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1
00:00:05,220 --> 00:00:08,352
Police Squad! In colour.
2
00:00:15,285 --> 00:00:17,165
Starring Leslie Nielsen.
3
00:00:22,218 --> 00:00:24,390
Also starring Alan North.
4
00:00:29,068 --> 00:00:31,323
And Rex Hamilton as Abraham Lincoln.
5
00:00:35,708 --> 00:00:39,342
Tonight's special guest star,
William Conrad.
6
00:00:45,523 --> 00:00:48,989
Tonight's episode,
Dead Men Don't Laugh.
7
00:01:02,605 --> 00:01:05,695
And all the rabbits
just kept hopping along.
8
00:01:08,660 --> 00:01:10,289
Well, things are really
rough all over, though.
9
00:01:10,414 --> 00:01:13,380
Last week I took my family
to Disneyland. We get off the freeway.
10
00:01:13,422 --> 00:01:16,136
Sign said
"Disneyland left," so we went home.
11
00:01:18,224 --> 00:01:20,229
Well, on behalf of the management,
12
00:01:20,313 --> 00:01:22,819
and I'd like to be
half of the management,
13
00:01:23,362 --> 00:01:26,744
please drink up,
enjoy yourselves and I'll see you later.
14
00:01:31,046 --> 00:01:33,343
That's a very good show, Joey.
15
00:01:34,429 --> 00:01:37,394
- Boss wants to see you.
- Yeah.
16
00:01:43,241 --> 00:01:45,497
Vic tells me that
some of the money I gave you
17
00:01:45,580 --> 00:01:47,752
to pay the Frenchman was missing.
18
00:01:52,931 --> 00:01:55,353
The Frenchman was very upset.
19
00:01:58,611 --> 00:02:00,198
Let me take your coat.
20
00:02:02,662 --> 00:02:04,500
And when he's upset,
21
00:02:08,384 --> 00:02:09,678
I'm upset.
22
00:02:10,514 --> 00:02:14,022
Look, I don't care what they say.
I didn't steal a thing.
23
00:02:15,024 --> 00:02:17,113
So, what do I tell the Frenchman?
24
00:02:17,447 --> 00:02:18,908
Just tell him
25
00:02:22,542 --> 00:02:24,672
I'll take care of everything.
26
00:02:35,155 --> 00:02:38,412
Veronica, I'd never double-cross you.
I swear on my life.
27
00:02:39,164 --> 00:02:41,879
Listen, Joey, that's good enough for me.
28
00:02:42,589 --> 00:02:45,930
Come on, let's have a drink
and forget about it.
29
00:02:47,058 --> 00:02:49,772
We make a great team, don't we?
30
00:02:50,065 --> 00:02:51,944
Let's toast to it.
31
00:02:54,868 --> 00:02:57,791
Here's to your health.
32
00:03:05,726 --> 00:03:08,901
That old black magic
Has me in its spell
33
00:03:09,485 --> 00:03:13,328
That old black magic
That you weave so well
34
00:03:14,246 --> 00:03:16,669
Those icy fingers up...
35
00:03:19,885 --> 00:03:23,643
Just tell the Frenchman
I'll take care of everything.
36
00:03:44,400 --> 00:03:46,238
Put up your hands!
37
00:04:02,317 --> 00:04:03,946
My name is Sergeant Frank Drebin,
38
00:04:04,030 --> 00:04:05,993
Detective Lieutenant, Police Squad.
39
00:04:06,076 --> 00:04:08,332
I was driving home Mary, the boss' wife
40
00:04:08,415 --> 00:04:10,921
when I received an urgent call
to report to the city morgue.
41
00:04:11,005 --> 00:04:12,425
I raced over.
42
00:04:12,508 --> 00:04:15,849
What had originally appeared to be
a routine drunk driving fatality
43
00:04:15,933 --> 00:04:18,856
was now developing into
a somewhat more involved situation.
44
00:04:19,357 --> 00:04:22,281
Even though the reported crash
had been a sizable one,
45
00:04:22,364 --> 00:04:23,952
various elements
of the victim's bloodstream
46
00:04:24,035 --> 00:04:27,251
had led the police coroner
to suspect something more.
47
00:04:27,877 --> 00:04:29,632
And we didn't need this kind of tsuris.
48
00:04:29,882 --> 00:04:32,304
A battery of pathologists
and reconstruction experts
49
00:04:32,388 --> 00:04:33,474
were assigned to the case.
50
00:04:34,017 --> 00:04:37,191
Crime can be a terrifying threat
to members of a community.
51
00:04:37,274 --> 00:04:41,367
And we had no intention of letting this
or any other go unchecked.
52
00:04:41,576 --> 00:04:43,999
When I arrived at the morgue,
my boss had already begun
53
00:04:44,082 --> 00:04:45,961
to investigate the physical evidence.
54
00:04:46,045 --> 00:04:49,344
As was our custom in such cases,
we began to talk.
55
00:04:49,720 --> 00:04:51,266
This is disgusting.
56
00:04:51,683 --> 00:04:54,565
Yeah, I can't take looking
at that sort of thing.
57
00:05:00,370 --> 00:05:03,085
Don, where have you got
the body of Joey Koldys?
58
00:05:03,168 --> 00:05:04,797
Right here. Excuse me.
59
00:05:06,969 --> 00:05:08,974
It's a typical 415.
60
00:05:09,642 --> 00:05:11,730
- Four fifteen?
- Yes.
61
00:05:11,814 --> 00:05:14,779
The body was found
415 feet from the car.
62
00:05:17,285 --> 00:05:20,626
- It must have been a terrible accident.
- Yes.
63
00:05:20,668 --> 00:05:23,550
But the crash didn't kill him.
64
00:05:23,800 --> 00:05:25,972
This man died of a drug overdose.
65
00:05:26,724 --> 00:05:27,977
Not only that, gentlemen,
66
00:05:28,060 --> 00:05:30,858
but the quantity involved
was so massive
67
00:05:31,192 --> 00:05:33,531
that it is my opinion Mr Koldys' death
68
00:05:33,615 --> 00:05:36,872
was either suicide or murder.
69
00:05:37,248 --> 00:05:39,545
Now, gentlemen, if you'll excuse me.
70
00:05:39,629 --> 00:05:42,761
You know, Frank,
there's another thing about Joey Koldys.
71
00:05:42,845 --> 00:05:45,476
He was a courier
for a major drug running operation
72
00:05:45,559 --> 00:05:47,272
and a police informant.
73
00:05:47,355 --> 00:05:48,734
I think he was murdered.
74
00:05:48,817 --> 00:05:50,989
You think
he was killed because he was a stoolie?
75
00:05:51,072 --> 00:05:52,200
Maybe.
76
00:05:52,284 --> 00:05:55,124
He was always bragging
about all the big money he handled.
77
00:05:55,207 --> 00:05:57,713
Maybe he got stupid
and tried to rip some off.
78
00:05:57,797 --> 00:06:00,052
- Thanks again, Don.
- You're welcome.
79
00:06:00,887 --> 00:06:03,727
Multiple bruises of the upper torso,
80
00:06:04,646 --> 00:06:07,862
some indication
of cardiovascular failure.
81
00:06:08,697 --> 00:06:10,201
Turning to the weather,
82
00:06:10,284 --> 00:06:12,247
we have a cold front
moving in from the west
83
00:06:12,331 --> 00:06:14,711
that'll bring us some showers tonight.
84
00:06:14,795 --> 00:06:17,384
Now, here's the latest
from Neil Diamond
85
00:06:17,593 --> 00:06:20,308
going out to Margot from Barry.
86
00:06:25,319 --> 00:06:26,698
- Ed?
- Frank.
87
00:06:26,781 --> 00:06:27,992
File on Koldys?
88
00:06:28,076 --> 00:06:30,707
Yeah, yeah,
it's a complete detailed report.
89
00:06:30,874 --> 00:06:33,171
Born 1942 in Philadelphia.
90
00:06:33,255 --> 00:06:36,303
In and out of foster homes
till the age of 15.
91
00:06:36,638 --> 00:06:38,642
Then he moved into Smith's home.
92
00:06:38,726 --> 00:06:42,401
He wasn't happy there either.
Then he fought Larry Holmes.
93
00:06:42,526 --> 00:06:46,118
Last known address
was a mobile home in Alabama.
94
00:06:47,120 --> 00:06:51,213
Married, one child. That didn't work out,
so he married a grown woman.
95
00:06:54,137 --> 00:06:56,810
I wonder how Joey
got involved with a dope ring.
96
00:06:56,893 --> 00:07:00,276
He was a comedian
at a nightclub called Mr V's.
97
00:07:00,443 --> 00:07:04,327
The place was a front
for a dealer named Veronica Rivers.
98
00:07:04,578 --> 00:07:08,838
Unfortunately, our contact
in the organisation is gone now, Frank.
99
00:07:08,922 --> 00:07:12,305
And what's worse is
we don't have a line on the supplier,
100
00:07:12,472 --> 00:07:14,059
some guy called the Frenchman.
101
00:07:14,142 --> 00:07:16,648
Until we get him, there's no sense going
after the little fish.
102
00:07:16,732 --> 00:07:20,866
That's right. And to get the big fish,
we're gonna need some bait.
103
00:07:20,950 --> 00:07:23,163
Can we get anyone else on the inside?
104
00:07:23,247 --> 00:07:26,463
Well, there is a job
at Mr V's open right now.
105
00:07:27,173 --> 00:07:28,342
Joey's.
106
00:07:29,762 --> 00:07:33,187
Mr V's is a high-class operation
in the exclusive Shorewood area
107
00:07:33,270 --> 00:07:34,356
that had launched the careers
108
00:07:34,440 --> 00:07:36,653
of some of the biggest names
in show business.
109
00:07:36,737 --> 00:07:40,329
Although alleged to be a mob hangout
by Ricky "The Weasel" Saltstein,
110
00:07:40,412 --> 00:07:42,918
we had no hard evidence
against the club.
111
00:07:43,001 --> 00:07:46,134
I decided to put in
my application for Joey Koldys'job.
112
00:07:49,183 --> 00:07:50,436
Madam.
113
00:07:59,874 --> 00:08:01,461
- Excuse me. You the manager?
- Yes.
114
00:08:01,545 --> 00:08:03,926
I'm an entertainer from out of town.
I hear you have an opening.
115
00:08:04,009 --> 00:08:05,429
Sorry, pal, we filled it.
116
00:08:05,513 --> 00:08:07,893
Nicky, where have you been?
Hurry up, will you? You're almost on!
117
00:08:07,977 --> 00:08:10,775
- I missed the bus.
- Look, we already got an entertainer.
118
00:08:10,858 --> 00:08:12,111
Why don't you come back
in a couple of weeks?
119
00:08:12,195 --> 00:08:14,200
- You Nicky McBreen?
- Yeah.
120
00:08:14,283 --> 00:08:16,121
- You're under arrest.
- For what?
121
00:08:16,204 --> 00:08:18,627
For reproducing the accounts,
pictures or descriptions
122
00:08:18,710 --> 00:08:19,963
of a major league baseball game
123
00:08:20,047 --> 00:08:22,260
without the express written
consent of the commissioner.
124
00:08:22,344 --> 00:08:25,685
- Okay, so I taped the game.
- All right, let's go.
125
00:08:25,768 --> 00:08:29,110
I had a few friends over,
but I didn't charge them.
126
00:08:29,402 --> 00:08:31,072
All right, a couple of bucks a head.
127
00:08:31,156 --> 00:08:33,286
Hey! What're you doing?
Without him, I got no show!
128
00:08:33,370 --> 00:08:35,834
What about me?
I'm hot and ready to go.
129
00:08:37,212 --> 00:08:39,760
Looks like I got no choice.
What's your name?
130
00:08:39,843 --> 00:08:42,182
Dewonderful. Tony Dewonderful.
131
00:08:42,516 --> 00:08:44,521
Tony, you're on.
132
00:08:50,660 --> 00:08:53,709
Ladies and gentlemen,
the Johnny Friendly Trio.
133
00:08:56,048 --> 00:08:58,929
Well, I just flew in
from out of town and a guy in the airport
134
00:08:59,013 --> 00:09:01,519
came up to me and says,
"Give me $5 till payday,"
135
00:09:01,644 --> 00:09:03,231
and I said, "Well, when's payday?"
136
00:09:03,357 --> 00:09:06,071
And he said,
"How do I know? You got the job."
137
00:09:06,197 --> 00:09:08,535
I got a bad back, you know.
My father has a bad back, too.
138
00:09:08,577 --> 00:09:10,039
So I guess it runs in the family.
139
00:09:10,122 --> 00:09:12,962
In 50 years,
I haven't seen him pick up a cheque.
140
00:09:13,798 --> 00:09:18,434
But you know, seriously, I mean it.
We did come from a poor family.
141
00:09:18,517 --> 00:09:20,605
The health department
wouldn't condemn our house
142
00:09:20,689 --> 00:09:22,401
until we had it painted.
143
00:09:25,408 --> 00:09:28,958
Anyway, seriously,
seriously now, seriously, hold it.
144
00:09:29,042 --> 00:09:30,838
Hold it now, seriously.
145
00:09:30,921 --> 00:09:33,761
Anyway, the gal came back
from her honeymoon.
146
00:09:35,808 --> 00:09:38,982
She was alone and her parents
welcomed her with open arms
147
00:09:39,065 --> 00:09:40,652
and they said to her...
148
00:09:53,474 --> 00:09:55,688
Well, anyway, the guy
looked up at her and he said,
149
00:09:55,771 --> 00:09:58,820
"Lady, I don't think I can
take 67 more of those."
150
00:10:09,680 --> 00:10:11,643
You know, my sister was so ugly,
151
00:10:11,726 --> 00:10:13,188
they used to put a pork chop
around her neck
152
00:10:13,272 --> 00:10:15,360
to get the dog to play with her.
153
00:10:19,578 --> 00:10:22,460
She was also so dumb, she came in
one time with hot turd on her hand
154
00:10:22,585 --> 00:10:25,300
and she said,
"Look what I almost stepped in."
155
00:10:30,562 --> 00:10:32,525
Hey, that's some laughter here.
156
00:10:32,609 --> 00:10:36,159
Is that your wife beside you
or you just throw up on the seat?
157
00:10:50,526 --> 00:10:53,115
No, no, no, no,
just a minute now. Hold on.
158
00:10:53,366 --> 00:10:55,245
No, really, time to get in tune.
159
00:10:55,329 --> 00:10:59,380
I'd like now to do for you my tribute
160
00:11:01,259 --> 00:11:04,851
to that fantastic performer, a great lady,
161
00:11:05,811 --> 00:11:06,981
Judy.
162
00:11:13,496 --> 00:11:16,837
Clang, clang, clang went the trolley
163
00:11:17,088 --> 00:11:19,970
Ding, ding, ding went the bell
164
00:11:20,387 --> 00:11:23,269
Zing, zing, zing went my heartstrings
165
00:11:23,687 --> 00:11:28,323
You know you made me, yes, I do
166
00:11:28,406 --> 00:11:30,620
You know I do, indeed I do
167
00:11:30,703 --> 00:11:34,337
Give me, give me, give me
Give me what I cry for
168
00:11:34,462 --> 00:11:38,638
You know you got
the kind of kisses that I die for
169
00:11:42,230 --> 00:11:46,866
If happy little bluebirds fly
170
00:11:47,660 --> 00:11:50,625
Beyond the rainbow
171
00:11:50,708 --> 00:11:53,339
Why, why
172
00:11:53,674 --> 00:11:57,140
can't I?
173
00:12:23,034 --> 00:12:26,751
I've seen the greatest. Sinatra,
Wayne Newton, Carl Yastrzemski.
174
00:12:26,835 --> 00:12:28,881
That was the greatest performance
I've ever seen in my life.
175
00:12:28,965 --> 00:12:30,761
- Not really.
- Yeah.
176
00:12:30,844 --> 00:12:33,601
Listen, the boss is here.
She wants to meet you.
177
00:12:35,689 --> 00:12:37,652
Have a seat, Mr Dewonderful.
178
00:12:39,406 --> 00:12:40,492
Thank you.
179
00:12:43,081 --> 00:12:45,336
- Thanks, Vic.
- Right.
180
00:12:56,613 --> 00:13:00,413
You looked pretty good up there.
How'd you like a job at my club?
181
00:13:00,497 --> 00:13:02,251
So you must be Mr V?
182
00:13:02,919 --> 00:13:06,762
Veronica Rivers.
You work this room real well.
183
00:13:07,346 --> 00:13:10,604
I heard about it
from a friend of mine, Joey Koldys.
184
00:13:17,077 --> 00:13:19,458
Terrible thing that happened to him.
185
00:13:23,217 --> 00:13:25,514
- Would you like a drink?
- Why not?
186
00:13:25,681 --> 00:13:29,941
Good. I took the liberty
of ordering you our house special.
187
00:13:34,660 --> 00:13:36,206
To your health, kid.
188
00:13:58,007 --> 00:13:59,719
Tony, are you okay?
189
00:14:07,571 --> 00:14:09,868
Went down the wrong pipe.
190
00:14:12,123 --> 00:14:14,754
Listen, if you're gonna work here,
you'll need a contract.
191
00:14:14,838 --> 00:14:17,845
So, why don't we go over to my office,
and you can sign one.
192
00:14:17,928 --> 00:14:18,973
Fine.
193
00:14:24,653 --> 00:14:27,367
- Hold it right there, Rivers!
- Who are you?
194
00:14:27,451 --> 00:14:29,372
My name is Jerry Layne. This is Lester.
195
00:14:29,455 --> 00:14:31,544
We came here before.
You wouldn't even watch our act.
196
00:14:31,627 --> 00:14:33,465
Well, now I'm gonna force you
to give us an audition.
197
00:14:33,548 --> 00:14:35,177
Sit down, both of you.
198
00:14:35,678 --> 00:14:38,769
Now, Jerry,
you'll never get away with this.
199
00:14:38,852 --> 00:14:40,565
Why don't you give me that gun
and we'll forget about it.
200
00:14:40,648 --> 00:14:42,235
Sit down and shut up.
201
00:14:43,948 --> 00:14:47,748
Now, here's my act.
Lester, I heard you had a girlfriend.
202
00:14:47,832 --> 00:14:49,085
- Yes.
- Is she pretty?
203
00:14:49,168 --> 00:14:51,090
- Try repulsive.
- Repulsive.
204
00:14:51,173 --> 00:14:53,136
No, but you're getting close.
205
00:14:53,554 --> 00:14:56,895
And now, I'm gonna do an imitation
of a priest eating potato chips.
206
00:14:56,978 --> 00:14:58,315
Stay where you are, mister.
207
00:14:58,398 --> 00:15:00,319
You better do what he says.
He'll blow your brains out.
208
00:15:00,403 --> 00:15:04,204
Jerry, all I wanna do is tell you that
I think that your act is really good.
209
00:15:04,287 --> 00:15:05,916
- You do?
- No, he doesn't.
210
00:15:05,999 --> 00:15:07,879
No, I do. I really do.
211
00:15:08,672 --> 00:15:11,011
It's a very good act. Now just relax.
212
00:15:12,348 --> 00:15:14,979
- Cigarette?
- Yes, I know.
213
00:15:16,190 --> 00:15:19,364
Well, I think that
214
00:15:19,448 --> 00:15:22,664
Thursday night here,
the 8:00 spot would be good for you.
215
00:15:22,747 --> 00:15:26,798
- Do you really?
- No, he doesn't. It's just a trick, stupid.
216
00:15:26,882 --> 00:15:28,761
Yeah, how do I know
you'll come through?
217
00:15:28,845 --> 00:15:31,476
That's easy. All you have to... Look out!
218
00:15:38,869 --> 00:15:42,419
Say, that was nice work.
You took a big chance doing that.
219
00:15:43,255 --> 00:15:45,385
Well, you take a chance
getting up in the morning,
220
00:15:45,468 --> 00:15:49,143
crossing the street
or sticking your face in a fan.
221
00:15:49,310 --> 00:15:53,612
Well, I like the way you did that.
I could use a man like you around here.
222
00:16:00,169 --> 00:16:02,759
How'd you like to make
a little extra cash?
223
00:16:03,469 --> 00:16:06,225
- What do I have to do?
- Just a little errand.
224
00:16:06,350 --> 00:16:08,439
Pick up my car tomorrow morning.
225
00:16:09,316 --> 00:16:11,028
It's down at the doc's.
226
00:16:12,907 --> 00:16:16,875
When I got to the doc's, everything was
in order as Veronica had said.
227
00:16:17,126 --> 00:16:20,926
Drug trafficking is the heart
and soul of criminal activity in the city
228
00:16:21,010 --> 00:16:25,019
and I knew we had tapped the source.
But now to find the evidence.
229
00:16:25,103 --> 00:16:28,653
I dropped the car off at the lab
for a more thorough investigation.
230
00:16:28,736 --> 00:16:30,073
So you see, Katie,
231
00:16:30,156 --> 00:16:33,748
objects get their shape from
the arrangement of their molecules.
232
00:16:33,832 --> 00:16:36,170
If you apply force to these molecules,
233
00:16:36,254 --> 00:16:40,180
their arrangement is altered,
and the shape of the object is changed.
234
00:16:40,514 --> 00:16:42,894
Now, did you bring me
your Crying Judy doll?
235
00:16:42,978 --> 00:16:44,690
Here she is, Mr Olson.
236
00:16:45,818 --> 00:16:47,029
All right.
237
00:16:47,530 --> 00:16:51,498
Let's see what happens when we put
Crying Judy in the trash compactor.
238
00:16:57,554 --> 00:16:58,849
Hi, Frank.
239
00:17:05,823 --> 00:17:08,037
Katie, why don't you run along now?
240
00:17:08,329 --> 00:17:11,378
Next week we'll learn
why cows look forward to giving milk.
241
00:17:11,461 --> 00:17:13,591
Thanks, Mr Olson. Bye.
242
00:17:14,552 --> 00:17:17,350
- What'd you come up with, Ted?
- The boys are working on the car.
243
00:17:17,434 --> 00:17:21,193
They haven't found anything yet.
Let me show you what we're doing.
244
00:17:23,239 --> 00:17:26,622
Now, Ed, I know the car is dirty.
245
00:17:27,624 --> 00:17:30,339
There's got to be drugs
here, somewhere.
246
00:17:47,797 --> 00:17:50,511
Going to Mississippi
247
00:17:50,595 --> 00:17:52,600
Going to see Delilah
248
00:17:53,852 --> 00:17:55,815
Going to Mississippi
249
00:17:56,609 --> 00:17:58,363
Going to see Delilah
250
00:18:12,730 --> 00:18:16,447
I don't know, Frank.
The pieces don't get much smaller.
251
00:18:18,076 --> 00:18:20,874
We got it! We got it!
252
00:18:25,552 --> 00:18:27,640
It was in the glove compartment.
253
00:18:28,976 --> 00:18:31,566
Well, look what we've got here.
254
00:18:31,984 --> 00:18:35,951
- Are you sure that's the real thing?
- There's only one way to find out.
255
00:18:36,411 --> 00:18:39,042
Frank, you know
we've had this car over six hours.
256
00:18:39,125 --> 00:18:40,838
Yeah, Veronica's gonna get suspicious.
257
00:18:40,921 --> 00:18:43,678
- Let's get this car back together fast.
- Right.
258
00:19:01,344 --> 00:19:05,061
Shine, little glow-worm
Glimmer, glimmer
259
00:19:05,479 --> 00:19:08,068
Wow, these guys are incredible!
260
00:19:08,110 --> 00:19:09,948
Ed, we know how
Veronica gets this stuff.
261
00:19:10,031 --> 00:19:12,412
Now we gotta flush out the source,
the Frenchman.
262
00:19:12,495 --> 00:19:14,335
To do that, Frank,
we're gonna have to find out
263
00:19:14,375 --> 00:19:16,337
when the next drop will be.
264
00:19:16,421 --> 00:19:18,384
The car is all back together.
265
00:19:18,927 --> 00:19:22,477
We did the best we could.
There were a few pieces left over.
266
00:19:23,772 --> 00:19:25,108
You know, Frank?
267
00:19:25,317 --> 00:19:28,992
I'll bet that doctor who gave you the car
could give us some answers.
268
00:19:29,117 --> 00:19:31,080
You're right. Let's go.
269
00:19:38,598 --> 00:19:40,770
Sponge on this side, please.
270
00:19:44,946 --> 00:19:46,492
All right, take him!
271
00:19:46,534 --> 00:19:49,249
After I returned the car,
my boss and I grabbed the doctor
272
00:19:49,333 --> 00:19:51,671
- and booked him for drug trafficking.
- What's going on here?
273
00:19:51,755 --> 00:19:54,762
After a lengthy interrogation,
he told us the next drop-off
274
00:19:54,846 --> 00:19:57,936
was going to be that night,
but he didn't know where.
275
00:19:58,103 --> 00:20:01,152
I decided to see
if one of my sources knew anything.
276
00:20:08,294 --> 00:20:12,637
Johnny, what do you know
about illegal narcotics?
277
00:20:15,477 --> 00:20:19,654
The city's been bone-dry because
of the unstable political situation
278
00:20:19,737 --> 00:20:22,619
in the drug-producing countries
of Latin America.
279
00:20:23,705 --> 00:20:25,668
I understand
there's gonna be a drop tonight.
280
00:20:25,751 --> 00:20:27,213
Do you know where?
281
00:20:29,719 --> 00:20:33,770
Word on the street has it
the action's happening at Mr V's.
282
00:20:35,065 --> 00:20:36,360
Thanks, Johnny.
283
00:20:43,752 --> 00:20:46,759
Johnny, some kids
on the show yesterday
284
00:20:46,801 --> 00:20:49,265
mentioned a new kind of music, ska.
285
00:20:50,058 --> 00:20:53,065
- Do you know anything about it?
- How should I know?
286
00:20:56,323 --> 00:20:58,704
Nothing but a modern offshoot
of reggae.
287
00:20:58,954 --> 00:21:02,838
Updated white rock influences,
definitely upbeat.
288
00:21:03,507 --> 00:21:05,511
It'll never become really popular
289
00:21:05,595 --> 00:21:09,228
because even though they've made
the back beat more conventional,
290
00:21:09,270 --> 00:21:12,110
it's still too exotic for mass acceptance.
291
00:21:14,198 --> 00:21:17,748
Johnny, I need some more
of that secret formula youth cream.
292
00:21:26,686 --> 00:21:28,022
Thanks, Johnny.
293
00:21:31,155 --> 00:21:35,582
Everything's all set, Frank.
We've got men covering all the exits.
294
00:21:37,962 --> 00:21:41,262
The Frenchman's gotta be here tonight.
Don't worry, I'll flush him out.
295
00:21:41,345 --> 00:21:43,559
It shouldn't be too hard
to find a Frenchman in this crowd.
296
00:21:43,642 --> 00:21:47,025
- Tony? Showtime.
- All right, here you go.
297
00:21:48,779 --> 00:21:51,912
- Gotta go.
- Good luck, Mr Dewonderful.
298
00:22:02,854 --> 00:22:06,613
There are chicks
just right for the kissin'
299
00:22:07,365 --> 00:22:11,499
And I mean to kiss me a few!
300
00:22:11,750 --> 00:22:16,219
Man, those chicks don't know
what they're missin'
301
00:22:16,678 --> 00:22:21,314
I've got a lot of living to do!
302
00:22:22,734 --> 00:22:26,075
Thank you.
Thank you, ladies and gentlemen.
303
00:22:27,328 --> 00:22:29,124
Thank you. Thank you.
304
00:22:30,126 --> 00:22:32,256
- Where do you live, lady?
- Right here.
305
00:22:32,340 --> 00:22:35,639
At the table? Where'd you put your car?
In the coat room?
306
00:22:36,976 --> 00:22:39,189
- What do you do, sir?
- Nothing.
307
00:22:39,273 --> 00:22:41,152
How do you know when you're done?
308
00:22:42,572 --> 00:22:45,663
- How about you, sir? What do you do?
- I'm an engineer.
309
00:22:45,746 --> 00:22:47,083
Lionel or HO?
310
00:22:48,837 --> 00:22:53,640
How about you, sir? What do you do?
Now be careful. Don't get it wrong.
311
00:22:55,352 --> 00:22:57,357
Where are you from? Baldymore?
312
00:23:01,867 --> 00:23:03,872
- Where are you from, sir?
- Milwaukee.
313
00:23:04,958 --> 00:23:07,130
Why, that's my hometown.
314
00:23:08,007 --> 00:23:10,137
- Where, where are you from?
- Seattle.
315
00:23:10,220 --> 00:23:12,768
Why that's my hometown.
316
00:23:14,606 --> 00:23:16,568
- Where are you from?
- Chicago.
317
00:23:16,652 --> 00:23:18,866
Why, that's your hometown.
318
00:23:22,416 --> 00:23:25,130
Now I'd like to tell you
about my dumb sister.
319
00:23:25,464 --> 00:23:27,970
She was so dumb
that she thought that a zebra
320
00:23:28,054 --> 00:23:30,601
was the largest size it came in.
321
00:23:30,685 --> 00:23:33,775
All right, Frenchman, the ruse is up!
322
00:23:51,525 --> 00:23:54,407
- You got nothing on us!
- I do now.
323
00:24:07,521 --> 00:24:09,902
Well, Frank, this case is all wrapped up.
324
00:24:09,985 --> 00:24:12,784
Veronica Rivers confessed
to killing Joey Koldys
325
00:24:12,867 --> 00:24:14,621
and we've got her and Vic
and the Frenchman
326
00:24:14,705 --> 00:24:16,208
on the dope smuggling rap.
327
00:24:16,292 --> 00:24:19,717
Yeah, from now on they'll all be up there
together in the Statesville prison.
328
00:24:19,800 --> 00:24:24,394
Yep, along with Martin and Dutch
and Lana, Thames and Sally Decker.
329
00:24:24,478 --> 00:24:25,998
Captain, can I
use your phone a minute?
330
00:24:26,065 --> 00:24:27,234
Yeah, go ahead.
331
00:24:27,318 --> 00:24:31,076
And you know, Ed, what all this
goes to show is that the only real dope
332
00:24:31,160 --> 00:24:33,290
is the one who sells it or buys it.
26895
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