All language subtitles for Batman S01E31 - Death In Slow Motion

♪ Batman ♪♪

A small theater inside
Washington center.

Gotham City's
new palace of the arts.

Wednesday afternoon
the silent film festival

draws to its close.

This tittle is incorrect.

It is not the end,
but the beginning.

The cue for one of the most
baffling crime waves

ever to confront
the dynamic duo.

Good afternoon, Mr. Van Jones.

Ah, how do you do?

On behalf of the committee
I want to thank you

for loaning us these rare films
from your matchless collection.

My pleasure, sir.

Always delighted
to do my bit for the lost art

of the silent film.

What the devil is this?

Where did you come from?

Well, I'm afraid,
you're not allowed in here.

Sorry, it's against the..

Your idea, Mr. Van Jones?

Certainly not.

I've spent a fortune collecting
prints of old movies.

But I'm hardly impressed
by an amateur group

who takes
all the attention from them.

Good day, sir.

- The Riddler?
- Correct, Chief O'Hara.

The Prince of Puzzlers, that
master of criminal conundrum.

Our hopes for his reform
have been blasted once again.

Let's hope our unknown friend
behind the mask is home.

Yes, commissioner.

We'll be right there.

- What is it, Bruce?
- The Riddler.

Holy Triple Feature!
Will that crook ever learn?

That's a good question. While we
pounder it...to the Bat-poles.

Excuse me.

♪ Batman ♪

♪ Batman ♪

♪ Batman ♪

♪ Batman ♪

♪ Batman Batman ♪

♪ Batman ♪

♪ Batman Batman ♪

♪ Batman ♪

♪ Na na na na na na ♪

♪ Batman ♪♪

"Why is a musician's
bandstand like an oven?"

Hmm!

The manager found that,
at the scene of the crime?

- Right, Batman.
- I just can't figure it out.

All that thieving devil got for
his trouble was 200 bucks.

Make anything
out of that riddle, Robin?

I think I do.

It depends on
digging musician's slang.

What do you mean, Boy Wonder?

"Why is a musician's
bandstand like an oven?"

Because that's where
he makes his bread.

- That's it of course.
- Makes bread?

Precisely, Chief O'Hara.

"Bread" in the musician's
vernacular means money.

Astonishing!
But where can this clue point?

- To an oven.
- A bakery.

Sure.

Mother Gotham's Bakery.
The biggest one in the city.

I'll bet you a dollar
the Riddler is after a fat roll.

- The Riddler?
- After a roll?

Yes, commissioner.
A fat and tasty roll.

Mother Gotham's payroll.

Come on, Robin.
Let's race there fast.

- Camera loaded, C.B.
- Ready to roll, Riddler baby.

Set it up.

Remember everybody, stay
in the range of C.B's camera.

Mr. Van Jones has commissioned
me to make him the greatest

silent films since the days
of immortal Charlie.

Oh, I hope his budget
is big enough

to take care of us all,
aye, Riddler?

Silence, Von Bloheim.

As I tried to tell you
our silent film is merely

a diversion, a clever ploy
essential to our real crime.

Ah! You mean,
heisting the payroll?

I do not.
I do not..

Petty cash this payroll, a
red herring for the dynamic duo.

- Wolf, ready with the pies?
- Ready.

C.B, ready with the camera?

Pauline...prepare.

Do your stuff.

Oh, please, sir.
Please, you must help me.

- Help you?
- Oh, yes.

I must have some bread,
to save my poor starving mother.

Oh, well, I'm sorry.
We don't sell bread back here.

It doesn't matter.

For I have no money
with which to buy.

Therefore I must beg.

Oh, charity, kind sir.
Charity.

Well.

I've had to sell
everything I own.

All except this torn,
tattered shall.

- Take it if you must.
- Oh, no, no..

No, I insist.

- Hold it.
- What's wrong?

- You can't come in here.
- Why? We have pies to deliver.

Take those pies down to
shipping.

That's at the other end.

Ah, but these are special pies.

Whipped sleeping cream
and nuts.

Whipped sleeping cream
and nuts?

Nuts to you!

Ah!

Von Bloheim,
the explosive eclair.

Quickly, quickly.

Back to the truck
for our new camera set up.

I'll be with you, soon as I've
decorated this place a bit.

- How'd it go, fellows.
- Oh, wunderbar.

- Even the Oscar undoubtedly.
- Inside, inside.

Pauline into
the front with me.

Aim your camera
through the slot, C.B

our stars should arrive
any moment now.

'Ready when you're,
Riddler baby.'

'Hey, here they come now.'

Action. Action.

No sign of crime here, Batman.
Looks like business as usual.

We could have been deceived
by that tricky clue.

On the other hand..

Let's race inside and take a
look at that payroll office.

'Got it all, Riddler baby.'

Good. Hold tight, everybody.
On to the next location.

Mother Gotham
never baked this pie.

It's topped with sleeping cream.

We're too late.
Look at that blow safe.

Look at that wall.

"Batman!
As one baker to another.

"How do you make
a dishonest shortcake?"

"Dishonest shortcake?"

- There's strawberry shortcake.
- And blueberry shortcake.

- A dishonest shortcake.
- I've got it.

A lie-berry. That would make it
a dishonest shortcake.

Right, Robin.
Lie-berry.

Clearly a corrupted version
of the word library.

"As one baker to another."

Hey, isn't there a branch
library on Baker Street?

Of course and Aunt Harriet
goes there all the time.

We haven't a moment to lose.
Let's race to the Batmobile.

Gotham City Library,
Bakers Street Branch.

Right again, dynamic duo.
Be careful.

- Roll on, C.B.
- Roll on.

Look at that crump.

'Right in a well marked,
no parking zone.'

He's within his rights, Robin.

Observe. Diplomatic plates.

The heart of diplomats
in our city

is a small prize to pay
for world leadership.

Now, let's check out
that library.

"Baker Street Branch
closed on Wednesdays

"because of lack of funds."

Shocking, shocking.

Looks like this lock
has been tampered with, Batman.

You're right.
We'll use the Bat-key.

- Cut.
- Cut!

Quickly now,
before the duo awake.

Back to our screening room
to see how this crime develops.

- Oh!
- Holy headache! What hit us?

A clever booby trick.

A bash on the head
by this weighty tome.

"A Pictorial History
of Silent Films."

Here it is.
It's the same theme that's run

through this entire
caper from the outset.

Look, Batman.
Two more riddles on the flyleaf.

Tough ones too.

Let's race back to the Bat-cave.

This needs more research.

Meanwhile in the abandoned
cutting room

of a bankrupt movie studio

the new secret headquarters
of the Riddler

and his felonious filmsters.

So, this rough cut is ready.

Roll 'em, Von Bloheim.
Roll 'em..

First sequence
in Mother Gotham's Bakery.

Wow! What a gasser.

Our stars. Our unwitting stars,
Von Bloheim.

- Where are they?
- Oh, just a moment.

They make their appearance
in the picture...now.

'Action.'

Now comes the topper!

Oh!

Watch. Watch these
costume clowns dance to my tune.

Oh!

But we have an even more
dazzling one to film.

My tricky brew.

All ready for the fatal party.

Are you sure Batman and Robin
will be there, Riddler baby?

Of course they'll be there.

On the flyleaf of that book,
I left them

the clearest clues conceivable.

"Riddle number one.

"What do you find
in a kitchen cabinet

"that is not alive?"

I should hope, sir,
that in the cabinet

of a properly run kitchen
one would find

nothing whatever alive.

Alfred's right, Batman.

In a clean kitchen cabinet,
everything should be dead.

Dead knifes,
dead forks, dead spoons--

Dead pots, dead pans..

Deadpans!

- Beg pardon, sir.
- Don't you see, Alfred.

It fits right in
with the criminal theme.

Deadpans,
like those comics used to use

in the old silent films.
Deadpan expressions.

Riddler's telling us his next
will be a deadpan caper.

Ah, yes.
Most ingenious.

Now, let's apply our brain power
to riddle number two.

"When is a new car
considered to be seedy?"

Holy kindergarten!
That's almost too easy.

A new car is seedy
when it's a lemon.

- Right.
- You don't fancy, sir.

That this famous desperado

intends to stoop to
the robbery of a lemonade stand?

You've hit it!
It fits like my glove.

What, Batman?

Mr. Van Jones
is a famous collector

of deadpan silent films.

He's also
a noted Temperance leader.

And he's invited Bruce Wayne
to a party this afternoon

in which nothing
will be served but lemonade.

Wow!

Will Mr. Wayne attend, sir?

Send his regrets, Alfred,
he will not.

But Batman will.

Come on, Robin,
we may still have time

to spike Riddler's punch.

Watch what this liquid does
when it is introduced

into the drinks,
you will see a Temperance Party

shot into...a Temper Party.

Alas, too late,
for even as the dynamic duo

speeds towards the residence
of Millionaire Van Jones

someone else is
in Van Jones' pantry first.

Spiking the punch.

That should bring out the temper
in these Temperance fellows.

Got the camera handy, C.B?

Where I can grab it
in a jiffy.

Happy shooting.
Enjoy...the comedy to come.

Maury Wills is better
than Honus Wagner?

Fifty times better.

You're an ignorant oaf,
Chief O'Hara.

I wonder why
I keep you in my department?

Your Royal Highness, often
I wondered why I don't resign.

Oops!

You clumsy brut,
did you bump into me on purpose?

I'm sorry. Terribly.

I didn't think Batman was on
your guest list, Mr. Van Jones?

Considering these louds
who were, dearie.

'I'd say that's
entirely in his favor.'

Pretty sour lemonade,
Van Jones.

You don't like it, lump it.

Personally I think,
it's unusually sweet.

The boors a man
in my position has to tolerate.

Is it worth it? Nah!

Batman to Batmobile.

All quite here, Batman.
Any sign of the Riddler?

Not a trace, Robin.

But there's something strange
going on here.

Everyone seems to be in the most
incredibly bad temper.

- 'It's pink.'
- In fact..

Say that once again, stupid.

Your dress is pink,
color blind.

I'll call you back.

Give him a solid..

Oh, sir.
Sir, please help me. Please.

What's the matter?

A horrible man
dressed in green tights

just leapt out of the bushes
and seized my little brother.

What? Dress in green?

Yes. And he shouted
the strangest thing.

He said, "A clue."

He shouted at me and
"When is a bonnet not a bonnet?"

The Riddler.
And that clue's a snap.

A bonnet is not a bonnet,
when it becomes a young woman.

Oh, how clever you are.

Citizens! Stop it.

Stop it!

Stop this.

Have you all lost your senses?

The Batman spots us.

Batman to, Robin.

Batman calling, Robin.

'Do you read me, Robin?'

'Robin.'

Riddle me this,
my criminal crew.

When does a Boy Wonder,
rhyme with bubble?

When he's in trouble.

Wrong. When he's double.

Split in two halves..

...right down the middle.

Camera ready to roll, C.B?

Rollin, Riddler baby.

How would you like
your sideburns, Boy Wonder?

Long or short?

Batman will get you for this,
Riddler.

- Oh!
- 'But will he get you?'

I believe you said,
he'd be here in no time?

Question?
Is no time, in time?

Uh!

After many gassers...
here's the real buzzer!

Is Robin going to wind up
as his own double?

Incredible but true.

Batman will not arrive in time!

Will we see
the Boy Wonder sawed in two?

Tune in tomorrow!

Same Bat-time!

Same Bat-channel!

♪ Batman ♪

♪ Batman ♪

♪ Batman ♪

♪ Batman ♪

♪ Batman Batman ♪

♪ Batman ♪

♪ Batman Batman ♪

♪ Batman ♪

♪ Na na na na na na ♪

♪ Batman ♪♪