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1
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MOST WANTED
2
00:00:10,010 --> 00:00:12,035
Coming soon to a theater near you
3
00:00:12,112 --> 00:00:14,410
it's "Weekend at Bernie's Part 7".
4
00:00:14,515 --> 00:00:18,107
That's right, Bernie's still dead
and he's stiffer than ever.
5
00:00:18,118 --> 00:00:19,208
Cool.
6
00:00:19,853 --> 00:00:20,913
Yeah.
7
00:00:23,924 --> 00:00:25,749
We're back with a breaking story.
8
00:00:25,926 --> 00:00:28,224
Eyewitness Action News
has just learned
9
00:00:28,262 --> 00:00:30,128
that a deranged
serial killer
10
00:00:30,129 --> 00:00:31,664
has escaped from the county jail.
11
00:00:31,665 --> 00:00:33,292
- Cool.
- Yeah.
12
00:00:34,835 --> 00:00:38,271
Unfortunately, we only have
this crude sketch of the escaped killer.
13
00:00:38,872 --> 00:00:41,171
But it shouldn't be
too hard to identify
14
00:00:41,174 --> 00:00:45,038
since he has a jailhouse tattoo
of the word "killer" on his forehead.
15
00:00:47,147 --> 00:00:48,808
I wish all words
were that cool.
16
00:00:48,849 --> 00:00:50,180
Yeah. Me too.
17
00:00:51,151 --> 00:00:53,085
lf you should encounter this individual
18
00:00:53,353 --> 00:00:54,843
do not, repeat,
19
00:00:55,055 --> 00:00:57,649
do not attempt to bring him
into custody yourself.
20
00:00:58,191 --> 00:01:00,382
Contact the police immediately.
21
00:01:00,727 --> 00:01:03,094
This individual is
armed and dangerous.
22
00:01:03,430 --> 00:01:06,693
However if you're ignorant enough
to go after him yourself
23
00:01:07,000 --> 00:01:09,928
there is a $ 25,000 reward.
24
00:01:10,804 --> 00:01:13,805
Hey Beavis, l bet when we get
that reward money
25
00:01:14,808 --> 00:01:17,334
we can, like,
see that movie about stiffies
26
00:01:17,844 --> 00:01:20,208
and we can, like,
pay for our own tattoos.
27
00:01:20,247 --> 00:01:21,510
Yeah, yeah.
28
00:01:22,215 --> 00:01:23,744
Then we'll be cool.
29
00:01:25,419 --> 00:01:27,319
I'll get a tattoo
of a butt.
30
00:01:28,055 --> 00:01:30,922
I'll get a tattoo of a butt
on my butt.
31
00:01:32,960 --> 00:01:34,052
- Oh yeah?
- Yeah.
32
00:01:35,228 --> 00:01:39,062
Well, I'll get a tattoo of a butt
that has a butt-shaped tattoo on it...
33
00:01:39,866 --> 00:01:41,934
and I'll get it right on my butt.
34
00:01:43,437 --> 00:01:44,666
That would be cool.
35
00:01:47,774 --> 00:01:49,139
Yeah, me too.
36
00:02:10,998 --> 00:02:12,124
Well, there's a chick...
37
00:02:16,403 --> 00:02:17,493
She's singing...
38
00:02:22,609 --> 00:02:25,704
I think, like, a couple of minutes later
she is gonna shake her boobs.
39
00:02:26,235 --> 00:02:27,235
Yeah, yeah!
40
00:02:27,247 --> 00:02:29,046
We don't want to miss that.
41
00:02:38,625 --> 00:02:40,222
- Cool!
- Yes, yes!
42
00:02:41,261 --> 00:02:42,826
That part is pretty cool.
43
00:02:51,838 --> 00:02:53,465
I like chicks that
have their own room.
44
00:02:55,542 --> 00:02:57,940
She needs, like, some
posters and stuff.
45
00:02:57,944 --> 00:02:59,742
Yeah. As a barbed wire.
46
00:03:00,313 --> 00:03:01,872
Wire, wire, wire.
47
00:03:02,015 --> 00:03:03,915
Barbed wire? Why?
48
00:03:04,184 --> 00:03:07,376
I don't know. I have some barbed
wire in my room. It's pretty cool.
49
00:03:07,487 --> 00:03:09,781
How come you have
barbed wire in your room?
50
00:03:09,923 --> 00:03:13,420
Well, sometimes at night, there's like, these
foreigners that try to come in my room.
51
00:03:14,728 --> 00:03:16,492
What are you
talking about, Beavis?
52
00:03:18,298 --> 00:03:19,298
You know...
53
00:03:19,299 --> 00:03:21,199
I think they're trying
to, like, steal secrets.
54
00:03:22,703 --> 00:03:24,364
You're stupid, Beavis.
55
00:03:24,404 --> 00:03:25,894
Yeah, thanks.
56
00:03:47,661 --> 00:03:49,654
He knows a chick
who makes toast?
57
00:03:50,530 --> 00:03:52,325
- So what?
- Yeah.
58
00:03:53,233 --> 00:03:55,262
- I can make toast.
- Yeah, really.
59
00:04:07,380 --> 00:04:09,380
I think this is
college music.
60
00:04:10,984 --> 00:04:13,480
You can tell because that
dude has orange hair.
61
00:04:14,621 --> 00:04:15,719
Yeah.
62
00:04:22,596 --> 00:04:24,189
That part is pretty cool.
63
00:04:26,700 --> 00:04:28,964
Then it's like, you can
also tell it's college music
64
00:04:29,002 --> 00:04:30,995
because it's like,
they are in a field.
65
00:04:32,506 --> 00:04:33,632
Fields suck.
66
00:04:41,615 --> 00:04:44,209
How come he keeps singing
about these people he knows?
67
00:04:45,519 --> 00:04:47,810
- Who gives a rat's ass?
- Yeah, yeah.
68
00:04:48,822 --> 00:04:52,122
I know a guy!
His hair is orange!
69
00:04:52,425 --> 00:04:53,617
He sucks!
70
00:05:28,895 --> 00:05:30,590
Butt tattoos are cool.
71
00:05:30,831 --> 00:05:31,893
Yeah.
72
00:05:31,998 --> 00:05:33,932
Butt tattoos
kick ass.
73
00:05:35,735 --> 00:05:37,703
And ass tattoos
kick butt.
74
00:05:42,209 --> 00:05:43,834
Speaking of butts, Beavis...
75
00:05:44,711 --> 00:05:46,506
did you just
cut the cheese?
76
00:05:48,114 --> 00:05:49,739
Sounded like it
came from outside.
77
00:05:50,116 --> 00:05:52,847
What are you,
some kind of butt-ventriloquist?
78
00:05:53,053 --> 00:05:54,113
Yeah.
79
00:05:55,021 --> 00:05:56,216
That would be cool.
80
00:06:00,760 --> 00:06:02,751
Are you sure you didn't
cut the cheese?
81
00:06:03,763 --> 00:06:04,796
Shut up, Butt-Head.
82
00:06:08,201 --> 00:06:11,171
Maybe it was, like,
a wild animal with rabies.
83
00:06:12,572 --> 00:06:13,668
Yeah, yeah.
84
00:06:13,907 --> 00:06:15,001
Let's catch it.
85
00:06:15,208 --> 00:06:17,006
I always wanted
a pet with rabies.
86
00:06:19,312 --> 00:06:20,408
Hey Beavis,
87
00:06:20,714 --> 00:06:22,182
did you know
when you get rabies...
88
00:06:23,216 --> 00:06:26,550
the doctor gives you, like,
200 shots in the stomach
89
00:06:26,586 --> 00:06:28,315
with this really
long needle?
90
00:06:29,823 --> 00:06:31,086
It feels like this.
91
00:06:46,006 --> 00:06:47,032
Whoa.
92
00:06:47,841 --> 00:06:49,409
That knife is cool.
93
00:06:49,809 --> 00:06:50,832
Yeah.
94
00:06:51,411 --> 00:06:53,602
Do you use that for, like,
cutting and stuff?
95
00:06:53,914 --> 00:06:56,246
Yeah. Cutting people.
96
00:06:57,517 --> 00:06:58,746
- Whoa!
- Yeah.
97
00:07:03,790 --> 00:07:04,852
Hey Beavis...
98
00:07:05,759 --> 00:07:08,729
remember that thing we were watching
about that escaped killer dude?
99
00:07:08,730 --> 00:07:09,663
Yeah, yeah.
100
00:07:09,663 --> 00:07:11,959
I bet this guy is
tracking him down, too.
101
00:07:13,266 --> 00:07:16,201
If he sees him first,
he could get our reward money.
102
00:07:16,870 --> 00:07:19,171
- That would suck!
- Yeah.
103
00:07:21,574 --> 00:07:24,305
Are you, like, trying to
track down that escaped killer?
104
00:07:24,778 --> 00:07:25,868
'cause we need
the money.
105
00:07:26,780 --> 00:07:27,870
For tattoos.
106
00:07:28,882 --> 00:07:30,543
And we decided
to track him down first.
107
00:07:30,583 --> 00:07:31,606
Yeah.
108
00:07:32,185 --> 00:07:35,277
I wouldn't want to have to, you
know, kick your ass or anything.
109
00:07:35,288 --> 00:07:37,780
I'm tracking people
down too, man.
110
00:07:38,091 --> 00:07:41,186
But nobody on my list
is an escaped killer.
111
00:07:41,895 --> 00:07:44,227
See, l don't need money
for a tattoo...
112
00:07:45,131 --> 00:07:47,090
'cause I already have one.
113
00:07:52,939 --> 00:07:54,006
Check this out.
114
00:08:19,666 --> 00:08:22,165
You guys are not going to
get any chicks looking like this.
115
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Yes they will, dumbass.
116
00:08:24,070 --> 00:08:27,165
Didn't you know that, like,
all you have to do is be in a video
117
00:08:27,407 --> 00:08:29,405
and you automatically
get chicks?
118
00:08:30,176 --> 00:08:31,666
Oh yeah.
That's cool.
119
00:08:32,512 --> 00:08:34,612
It's like, all you gotta do
is go out and say:
120
00:08:34,981 --> 00:08:36,075
Hey baby...
121
00:08:36,983 --> 00:08:38,417
I'm, like, in a video...
122
00:08:40,020 --> 00:08:41,510
Wanna, you know...
123
00:08:43,623 --> 00:08:44,722
Hey, leave her alone.
124
00:08:45,291 --> 00:08:46,319
Leave her alone.
125
00:08:46,593 --> 00:08:47,689
Fartknocker!
126
00:08:48,428 --> 00:08:49,527
I'll kick your ass.
127
00:09:12,552 --> 00:09:14,286
These guys are, like,
a cross between...
128
00:09:14,354 --> 00:09:16,482
Danzig and Megadeth.
129
00:09:18,358 --> 00:09:21,887
I think they're like a cross
between Danzig and my butt.
130
00:09:24,864 --> 00:09:26,759
That wasn't very
nice, Butt-Head.
131
00:09:27,467 --> 00:09:29,367
Yeah it was. It was a compliment.
132
00:09:30,070 --> 00:09:31,565
My butt rules.
133
00:09:31,771 --> 00:09:32,867
Yeah.
134
00:09:40,313 --> 00:09:41,781
He said "number one".
135
00:09:53,793 --> 00:09:55,492
Eww, he stepped in it.
136
00:09:56,696 --> 00:09:58,395
Someobody has to clean it up.
137
00:10:03,303 --> 00:10:04,771
This video is all serious.
138
00:10:04,804 --> 00:10:07,239
Yeah, it seriously sucks.
139
00:10:17,917 --> 00:10:19,016
Hey Butt-Head.
140
00:10:19,519 --> 00:10:20,809
This sucks, huh?
141
00:10:22,122 --> 00:10:23,812
It sure does, Beavis.
142
00:10:25,558 --> 00:10:28,127
These guys are
skinny wimps, too.
143
00:10:29,729 --> 00:10:32,125
But they could
still kick Axl's ass.
144
00:10:36,836 --> 00:10:37,930
Whoa!
145
00:10:38,738 --> 00:10:40,672
- That was kinda cool.
- Where?
146
00:10:50,083 --> 00:10:51,682
I'm getting dizzy.
147
00:10:53,453 --> 00:10:54,549
Me too.
148
00:10:54,687 --> 00:10:55,754
I'm gonna vomit.
149
00:11:16,643 --> 00:11:17,733
Check out the bee.
150
00:11:21,614 --> 00:11:22,704
Shut up, Beavis.
151
00:11:26,419 --> 00:11:27,818
That monkey was cool.
152
00:11:29,322 --> 00:11:30,619
I'd like to spank it.
153
00:11:33,026 --> 00:11:34,026
Hey Beavis...
154
00:11:34,027 --> 00:11:36,223
- he wants someone to pull his finger.
- Yeah.
155
00:11:36,563 --> 00:11:38,456
Now he's pointing
down there.
156
00:12:02,488 --> 00:12:03,580
Whoa!
157
00:12:04,791 --> 00:12:05,822
Cool.
158
00:12:06,326 --> 00:12:08,688
It says: "KILER".
159
00:12:08,795 --> 00:12:11,628
- Yeah, is that your name?
- "Kiler"?
160
00:12:12,832 --> 00:12:14,926
"Kiler", I like that.
161
00:12:25,445 --> 00:12:26,708
Good one, Kiler.
162
00:12:27,714 --> 00:12:30,115
Yeah, yeah, that was cool.
163
00:12:32,952 --> 00:12:34,014
You hear that?
164
00:12:34,520 --> 00:12:35,614
Hear what?
165
00:12:36,923 --> 00:12:39,815
The voices. Voices are everywhere.
166
00:12:40,059 --> 00:12:41,322
They're calling me.
167
00:12:41,628 --> 00:12:42,720
They guide me.
168
00:12:43,229 --> 00:12:44,355
They command me.
169
00:12:44,964 --> 00:12:47,831
And forever I must obey!
170
00:12:50,470 --> 00:12:52,302
Yeah, voices are cool.
171
00:12:52,338 --> 00:12:53,430
I hear voices, too.
172
00:12:53,473 --> 00:12:56,342
They, like, tell me to do stuff,
like stay home from school...
173
00:12:56,342 --> 00:12:58,834
and watch TV and, like, break stuff.
174
00:12:58,878 --> 00:13:00,136
And, like, just...
175
00:13:02,215 --> 00:13:03,683
Preach on,
Brother Beavis.
176
00:13:03,716 --> 00:13:06,344
Yeah, and sometimes the voices
tell me to do other stuff like...
177
00:13:06,386 --> 00:13:07,649
even cooler stuff.
178
00:13:07,687 --> 00:13:11,055
Like, this voice said: "Beavis,
go get a gum wrapper
179
00:13:11,056 --> 00:13:12,849
and, like, roll it up into a cone
180
00:13:12,925 --> 00:13:15,155
and, like, stick it in the butt
of a big old horsefly".
181
00:13:15,194 --> 00:13:17,293
And it's like, the fly
just flies straight up.
182
00:13:17,297 --> 00:13:19,561
And it's like, it keeps going up,
and it can't come down
183
00:13:19,561 --> 00:13:22,029
'cause it can't fly anywhere else,
and, like, keeps going up
184
00:13:22,030 --> 00:13:23,593
until it dies of exhaustion
185
00:13:24,003 --> 00:13:25,495
and then it falls down.
186
00:13:28,207 --> 00:13:29,499
Settle down, Beavis.
187
00:13:30,910 --> 00:13:32,400
You're twisted, man!
188
00:13:33,146 --> 00:13:34,409
Yours is twisted.
189
00:13:36,215 --> 00:13:38,047
You twisted yours
when you were chocking it.
190
00:13:49,028 --> 00:13:50,126
Yeah.
191
00:13:58,371 --> 00:13:59,469
Yeah.
192
00:14:06,112 --> 00:14:08,877
You know, l'm always
gonna remember you guys.
193
00:14:09,916 --> 00:14:14,513
And now it's time for me to give you
boys something to remember me by.
194
00:14:15,188 --> 00:14:16,380
Get moving!
195
00:14:23,596 --> 00:14:26,524
- This may hurt a little.
- Yeah.
196
00:14:28,601 --> 00:14:32,401
Let me get this straight.
You want a tattoo of a butt
197
00:14:33,005 --> 00:14:35,537
which has a butt-shaped tattoo on it?
198
00:14:35,641 --> 00:14:36,701
Yeah.
199
00:14:37,410 --> 00:14:39,103
And I want it right on my butt.
200
00:14:40,146 --> 00:14:43,673
Hey Butt-Head, how come
you're so interested in butts?
201
00:14:43,716 --> 00:14:45,047
Shut up, Beavis.
202
00:14:47,353 --> 00:14:48,411
Yeah.
203
00:15:00,099 --> 00:15:01,396
Oh man!
204
00:15:02,869 --> 00:15:03,959
What is this?
205
00:15:06,005 --> 00:15:08,372
This guy really sucks.
206
00:15:09,509 --> 00:15:10,972
And I'm not just saying that either.
207
00:15:19,318 --> 00:15:21,213
Where's he going
with that magazine?
208
00:15:22,889 --> 00:15:24,357
He's going into the bathroom...
209
00:15:24,390 --> 00:15:26,085
and he's taking
those guys with him.
210
00:15:27,093 --> 00:15:28,189
Yeah.
211
00:15:39,238 --> 00:15:42,037
"Sing me a song,
you're the piano man".
212
00:15:51,717 --> 00:15:52,749
Whoa!
213
00:15:53,119 --> 00:15:54,348
That’s a pretty cool shirt.
214
00:15:54,454 --> 00:15:56,218
Yeah, that guy is cool.
215
00:15:56,923 --> 00:15:59,820
- Whoa, spit, spit! Cool!
- Yeah.
216
00:16:05,965 --> 00:16:07,455
Whoa, look at the nads on that pig.
217
00:16:12,205 --> 00:16:13,973
You know, I got
nads like that.
218
00:16:15,308 --> 00:16:17,067
Really, you got pig nads?
219
00:16:20,379 --> 00:16:21,402
Sort of.
220
00:16:33,125 --> 00:16:35,587
Whoa, that concubine
is gonna run them over.
221
00:16:36,829 --> 00:16:38,428
- Yes!
- No way, dumbass.
222
00:16:39,131 --> 00:16:40,724
That's not really
running them over.
223
00:16:40,800 --> 00:16:42,199
Yeah it is! Look!
224
00:16:42,902 --> 00:16:43,992
No way, Beavis.
225
00:16:45,338 --> 00:16:47,966
That is just, like, one of
those tricks, uh...
226
00:16:48,007 --> 00:16:50,066
trick pornography... things.
227
00:16:50,109 --> 00:16:52,243
No way, Butt-Head. They were
gone as soon as it left.
228
00:16:52,311 --> 00:16:55,242
Beavis, if that thing killed him,
how come they're still singing?
229
00:16:57,750 --> 00:16:58,910
I don't know.
230
00:17:00,853 --> 00:17:01,979
Dumbass.
231
00:17:07,660 --> 00:17:11,062
You know, like, with those monster
trucks and like, that pig and everything...
232
00:17:12,031 --> 00:17:14,159
this video is turning
out to be pretty cool.
233
00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:15,260
Yeah, yeah.
234
00:17:15,668 --> 00:17:17,299
And don't forget about
the big nads.
235
00:17:19,405 --> 00:17:20,463
I didn't forget, Beavis.
236
00:17:21,674 --> 00:17:23,000
That's part
of the pig.
237
00:17:23,209 --> 00:17:24,308
Oh yeah.
238
00:17:32,518 --> 00:17:34,516
- Now we're cool.
- Yeah. Yeah.
239
00:17:38,190 --> 00:17:41,558
We have a bizarre but
welcome update on a breaking story.
240
00:17:42,228 --> 00:17:45,528
The serial killer who escaped yesterday
from the state penitentiary
241
00:17:45,529 --> 00:17:47,567
is now back behind bars
242
00:17:47,567 --> 00:17:49,695
and authorities say
he turned himself in.
243
00:17:50,803 --> 00:17:53,904
He claims voices have directed him
to a new calling.
244
00:17:54,073 --> 00:17:57,566
A warden at the state penitentiary
described him as a new man
245
00:17:57,610 --> 00:17:59,073
a model prisoner.
246
00:17:59,845 --> 00:18:03,839
According to officials he says
he will now serve out his life sentence
247
00:18:03,840 --> 00:18:07,399
administering tattoos to the derrières
of his fellow inmates.
248
00:18:09,522 --> 00:18:11,756
These are tattoos of derrières
249
00:18:11,757 --> 00:18:14,053
with derrière-shaped tattoos on them.
250
00:18:14,794 --> 00:18:17,695
- In other news, the 5...
- Hey Butt-Head, what did that guy say?
251
00:18:19,665 --> 00:18:20,796
I don't know.
252
00:18:35,291 --> 00:18:37,016
I wanna spit in their faces…
253
00:18:37,016 --> 00:18:38,575
She's gonna spit on someone?
254
00:18:39,385 --> 00:18:41,149
Yeah, yeah. Go for it.
255
00:18:41,187 --> 00:18:42,586
That would be pretty cool.
256
00:18:48,394 --> 00:18:50,123
Is that Dave Mustaine?
257
00:18:50,896 --> 00:18:51,995
Yeah, yeah.
258
00:18:53,299 --> 00:18:56,098
"I got a bowling ball
in my stomach...
259
00:18:56,102 --> 00:18:58,730
I got a desert
in my mouth…".
260
00:18:59,705 --> 00:19:01,264
That was pretty good, Beavis.
261
00:19:02,341 --> 00:19:03,533
Yeah, thanks.
262
00:19:13,185 --> 00:19:16,348
How many videos are they gonna make
with chicks in a bathtub?
263
00:19:17,356 --> 00:19:20,417
At least if they showed
them naked it would be cool.
264
00:19:20,459 --> 00:19:23,360
Yeah. How come they never
have chicks in showers?
265
00:19:24,664 --> 00:19:26,059
Like in soap commercials.
266
00:19:26,599 --> 00:19:29,398
Did you ever see that soap commercial
where that chick gets stabbed?
267
00:19:32,672 --> 00:19:34,167
No, buttmunch...
268
00:19:35,007 --> 00:19:37,203
that's that movie
about those guys in the woods.
269
00:19:38,277 --> 00:19:40,602
They're not in the woods.
They're in the shower.
270
00:19:48,888 --> 00:19:51,687
Is this, like, a commercial for VH1?
271
00:19:53,492 --> 00:19:55,324
"The difference between
you and your parents".
272
00:19:56,395 --> 00:19:57,421
Yeah.
273
00:19:57,997 --> 00:19:59,396
That's stupid.
274
00:20:04,303 --> 00:20:05,600
What's that
red thing?
275
00:20:06,439 --> 00:20:08,200
I think it's
toilet paper.
276
00:20:09,842 --> 00:20:10,904
Yeah.
277
00:20:11,711 --> 00:20:13,001
It's toilet paper!
278
00:20:25,858 --> 00:20:28,623
This sounds pretty cool
for Ugly Kid Joe.
279
00:20:29,328 --> 00:20:30,354
Yeah, yeah.
280
00:20:31,163 --> 00:20:33,563
Hey Butt-Head, I don't
think this is Ugly Kid Joe.
281
00:20:33,833 --> 00:20:34,925
Well...
282
00:20:35,434 --> 00:20:36,458
He's ugly...
283
00:20:38,070 --> 00:20:40,138
I don't know,
I don't think he's that bad.
284
00:20:49,248 --> 00:20:51,883
- This part of the song rules.
- Yeah, yeah.
285
00:20:58,958 --> 00:20:59,989
That was cool.
286
00:21:00,025 --> 00:21:03,689
But it's like, then he gets all tired and
he has to take a break. See?
287
00:21:11,537 --> 00:21:12,629
Hey Butt-Head,
288
00:21:12,629 --> 00:21:14,939
have you ever, like, stuck your
face on the xerox machine
289
00:21:14,940 --> 00:21:16,401
and like, xeroxed your face?
290
00:21:17,209 --> 00:21:18,235
Yeah.
291
00:21:18,844 --> 00:21:20,808
I xeroxed my butt once.
292
00:21:21,714 --> 00:21:24,706
Remember that time
we enlarged your butt
293
00:21:25,151 --> 00:21:26,812
like, 141%?
294
00:21:27,319 --> 00:21:30,983
Yeah. I think I'm gonna go back
there and like, enlarge my wiener.
295
00:21:31,023 --> 00:21:32,252
Yeah, yeah.
296
00:21:33,225 --> 00:21:36,718
Then you can like, make 100 copies
and like, pass them out all over school.
297
00:21:39,932 --> 00:21:41,026
Ok.
20799
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