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www.tvsubtitles.net
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As a kid, I wasn't superstitious,
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00:00:08,222 --> 00:00:09,979
but everybody in my family was.
4
00:00:09,980 --> 00:00:11,309
If my mother spilled salt,
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00:00:11,414 --> 00:00:13,563
she would always throw some
over her shoulder
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00:00:13,610 --> 00:00:15,070
for good luck.
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That's nine cents' worth of salt.
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00:00:22,260 --> 00:00:24,778
Drew wouldn't walk under a ladder,
no matter what.
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00:00:24,850 --> 00:00:26,422
Sonny! Help me!
10
00:00:26,537 --> 00:00:28,427
I've fallen and I can't get up!
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00:00:28,930 --> 00:00:30,142
You want me to help you,
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00:00:30,150 --> 00:00:32,721
you're going to have to crawl
from underneath this ladder first.
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00:00:32,733 --> 00:00:34,851
And Tonya believed that,
if she stepped on a crack,
14
00:00:34,896 --> 00:00:36,509
she'd break my mother's back.
15
00:00:46,237 --> 00:00:49,513
I wasn't superstitious,
but I did believe in bad luck.
16
00:00:52,860 --> 00:00:54,545
Mom, I need some socks.
17
00:00:55,042 --> 00:00:57,343
Julius, give Chris
a pair of your socks, please.
18
00:01:04,010 --> 00:01:05,589
These the only pair of socks you got?
19
00:01:05,742 --> 00:01:06,810
Yeah.
20
00:01:07,316 --> 00:01:09,558
Besides, those are my lucky socks.
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00:01:10,940 --> 00:01:13,510
I was wearing those socks
the night I met your mother.
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00:01:14,934 --> 00:01:17,998
Girl, he's cute,
but look at those socks!
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00:01:24,382 --> 00:01:27,280
I didn't think my father's lucky socks
would make a difference.
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00:01:28,920 --> 00:01:31,459
Hey, lil' dude from across the street!
25
00:01:31,605 --> 00:01:32,885
I just hit the numbers.
26
00:01:33,077 --> 00:01:34,333
Want to hold a dollar?
27
00:01:34,630 --> 00:01:35,663
Yeah. Thanks.
28
00:01:35,687 --> 00:01:36,810
That's all you.
29
00:01:37,902 --> 00:01:39,405
They not only made a difference,
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00:01:39,492 --> 00:01:40,784
they made a dollar.
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2x09 Everybody Hates Superstition
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Presync: YTET - www.ydy.com
Synchro: Sixe
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00:01:48,534 --> 00:01:50,946
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00:02:12,540 --> 00:02:13,878
I believed in good luck.
35
00:02:14,037 --> 00:02:16,197
I just never believed
it could happen to me.
36
00:02:18,240 --> 00:02:20,592
Man, I'm sorry.
I forgot my bus pass.
37
00:02:21,009 --> 00:02:22,864
It's all right, man. I know you.
38
00:02:23,501 --> 00:02:25,685
For real?
Thanks.
39
00:02:26,400 --> 00:02:29,000
On the second bus,
I got even luckier.
40
00:02:30,150 --> 00:02:32,632
Hi. I'm Darlene.
What's your name?
41
00:02:32,720 --> 00:02:33,727
I'm Chris.
42
00:02:33,860 --> 00:02:35,653
That's one of my favorite names.
43
00:02:35,825 --> 00:02:37,833
That's not even my favorite name.
44
00:02:38,253 --> 00:02:40,169
I was even getting lucky at school.
45
00:02:40,284 --> 00:02:41,928
Take that, Mr. Miyagi!
46
00:02:43,127 --> 00:02:44,889
Hey, Chris. Want to smack this kid?
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00:02:44,969 --> 00:02:46,480
No, I'm okay.
48
00:02:46,828 --> 00:02:49,510
This kid needs a pair
of lucky socks and a gun.
49
00:02:50,860 --> 00:02:53,255
Things were going so good,
I almost felt white.
50
00:02:53,326 --> 00:02:55,662
Chris, I bought you something.
51
00:02:55,910 --> 00:02:58,902
It's a copy of Roots 4:
Kunta's Revenge.
52
00:02:59,135 --> 00:03:00,591
It's not even out yet.
53
00:03:01,498 --> 00:03:02,696
Thanks.
54
00:03:02,926 --> 00:03:04,049
Roots 4 was good,
55
00:03:04,102 --> 00:03:07,343
but my favorite was Roots 6:
Hitler Strikes Back.
56
00:03:09,910 --> 00:03:11,039
Even though we were poor,
57
00:03:11,145 --> 00:03:13,141
it didn't stop us
from asking for stuff.
58
00:03:14,663 --> 00:03:17,175
Mama, can I have pink carpet
in my bedroom?
59
00:03:17,320 --> 00:03:20,236
Pink carpet?
What you need pink carpet for?
60
00:03:20,335 --> 00:03:23,024
Well, because Billy Ocean
has pink carpet in his bedroom.
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00:03:23,125 --> 00:03:26,401
Along with a baby giraffe,
a disco ball and three midgets.
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00:03:26,964 --> 00:03:28,859
Well, as soon as you get a hit record,
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00:03:28,933 --> 00:03:31,188
you can have any color carpet you want.
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00:03:31,310 --> 00:03:33,039
But, just because we asked for stuff,
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00:03:33,130 --> 00:03:34,657
it didn't mean we'd get it.
66
00:03:38,272 --> 00:03:39,459
Holy Ralph Tresvant!
67
00:03:41,881 --> 00:03:43,713
Hey, man, what you doing?
68
00:03:44,378 --> 00:03:46,538
Just getting ready
for the school talent show.
69
00:03:46,684 --> 00:03:48,199
Oh, I'm going to need a suit.
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00:03:48,305 --> 00:03:50,253
You gonna make some money
in that talent show?
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00:03:50,311 --> 00:03:51,759
What you need a new suit for?
72
00:03:51,869 --> 00:03:54,119
So I can pop my collar up
while I'm performing.
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00:03:54,203 --> 00:03:56,049
You know how much a new suit costs?
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00:03:56,237 --> 00:03:59,243
I'm not going to spend money on a suit
just so you can break the collar.
75
00:03:59,492 --> 00:04:00,699
You want to pop something,
76
00:04:00,811 --> 00:04:02,919
pop open a pen,
and fill out a job application.
77
00:04:03,002 --> 00:04:05,010
Then you can buy
all the suits you want.
78
00:04:08,003 --> 00:04:10,878
Some guys have all the luck,
and today that guy was me.
79
00:04:10,995 --> 00:04:12,401
Chris, how was your day, baby?
80
00:04:12,669 --> 00:04:15,786
It was strange. It was, like,
one of the greatest days of my life.
81
00:04:15,868 --> 00:04:17,101
Why? What happened?
82
00:04:17,160 --> 00:04:18,229
Nothing.
83
00:04:18,252 --> 00:04:20,345
- Nobody beat you up?
- Nope.
84
00:04:20,490 --> 00:04:22,206
- Nobody rapped you?
- Nope.
85
00:04:22,416 --> 00:04:23,469
Well, how was school?
86
00:04:23,537 --> 00:04:25,389
It was good.
I got a "B" on my math quiz.
87
00:04:25,937 --> 00:04:27,922
Starting to think
these socks really are lucky.
88
00:04:27,968 --> 00:04:30,949
Okay, Mr. Lucky Socks,
go wash your hands. Dinner's ready.
89
00:04:31,204 --> 00:04:32,425
What are we having?
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00:04:32,552 --> 00:04:36,180
My favorite meal was meat loaf,
mashed potatoes and peach cobbler.
91
00:04:36,390 --> 00:04:39,096
Meat loaf, mashed potatoes
and peach cobbler.
92
00:04:50,666 --> 00:04:51,805
What's wrong with you?
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00:04:53,176 --> 00:04:55,947
I asked Mama for pink carpet,
and she said no.
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00:04:56,242 --> 00:04:57,519
Why did you ask her?
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00:04:57,651 --> 00:04:59,319
You know Dad's
the one that spoils you.
96
00:04:59,458 --> 00:05:01,295
You think he'd give me pink carpet?
97
00:05:01,430 --> 00:05:03,258
Yeah. He never says no to you.
98
00:05:03,771 --> 00:05:06,553
But I asked him for a suit,
and he said no.
99
00:05:06,906 --> 00:05:08,855
- You asked him already?
- Yeah.
100
00:05:08,961 --> 00:05:10,137
You should have asked Mama.
101
00:05:10,184 --> 00:05:11,949
You know she don't like a suit raggedy.
102
00:05:12,030 --> 00:05:15,069
That was the moment Drew discovered
the oldest parent trick in the book.
103
00:05:15,323 --> 00:05:18,019
When one parent says no,
just ask the other one.
104
00:05:18,075 --> 00:05:20,740
You know what?
I got an idea.
105
00:05:21,620 --> 00:05:23,842
The next day,
my socks were still holding up,
106
00:05:23,930 --> 00:05:25,029
and so was my luck.
107
00:05:25,030 --> 00:05:26,849
Look,
there's no such thing as lucky socks.
108
00:05:27,059 --> 00:05:28,959
That's like believing
in four-leaf clovers,
109
00:05:28,960 --> 00:05:30,740
shooting stars
or Michael Landon.
110
00:05:30,775 --> 00:05:33,299
How do you explain all this luck
that's been happening to me?
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00:05:33,329 --> 00:05:34,350
It's probability.
112
00:05:34,374 --> 00:05:36,172
It's the number of times
an event can happen
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00:05:36,195 --> 00:05:38,168
divided by the total number
of possible outcomes.
114
00:05:38,203 --> 00:05:39,412
Hi, Chris.
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00:05:39,690 --> 00:05:42,491
If they were miracle socks,
I would have had a shot,
116
00:05:42,570 --> 00:05:44,149
but they were only lucky socks,
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00:05:44,241 --> 00:05:45,885
so I just got a smile.
118
00:05:46,930 --> 00:05:50,156
I don't care what you say--
the socks work.
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00:05:50,660 --> 00:05:53,009
If O. J. Simpson
had been wearing these socks,
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00:05:53,090 --> 00:05:55,009
he'd be covering football games now.
121
00:05:55,081 --> 00:05:59,216
Okay, don't forget to study
for your history test on Monday.
122
00:05:59,263 --> 00:06:00,934
It'll be on people in history
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00:06:01,016 --> 00:06:04,429
who have achieved their goals
against all odds.
124
00:06:05,099 --> 00:06:06,419
You want to study after school?
125
00:06:06,443 --> 00:06:07,453
I don't need to study.
126
00:06:07,478 --> 00:06:08,852
I got my lucky socks.
127
00:06:10,770 --> 00:06:12,131
Drew's plan was simple:
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00:06:12,318 --> 00:06:15,159
Act like this was the first time
they had asked for what they wanted.
129
00:06:15,244 --> 00:06:16,739
Like the no's never happened.
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00:06:16,839 --> 00:06:18,072
Hey, Daddy.
131
00:06:18,726 --> 00:06:20,252
Can I get pink carpet for my room?
132
00:06:20,490 --> 00:06:21,909
What do you need carpet for?
133
00:06:22,022 --> 00:06:23,748
Because Billy Ocean has pink carpet,
134
00:06:23,769 --> 00:06:25,836
and you know how much
I love Billy Ocean.
135
00:06:27,838 --> 00:06:29,153
I'll tell you what.
136
00:06:29,296 --> 00:06:31,456
We'll go look for
some pink carpet tomorrow.
137
00:06:31,520 --> 00:06:32,972
Thank you, Daddy.
138
00:06:45,890 --> 00:06:47,449
One down, one to go.
139
00:06:52,300 --> 00:06:54,899
Hey, Mom, can I get a new suit
for the school talent show?
140
00:06:55,020 --> 00:06:57,333
Not unless your talent
is wearing a suit.
141
00:06:57,560 --> 00:06:59,618
But I'm performing
"Candy Girl", by New Edition,
142
00:06:59,676 --> 00:07:01,656
and the whole school
is going to be there.
143
00:07:02,075 --> 00:07:03,519
Drew could do a lot of things,
144
00:07:03,582 --> 00:07:05,931
but my mother knew
singing wasn't one of them.
145
00:07:06,740 --> 00:07:09,380
Oh, well, that..
That... that's nice, baby.
146
00:07:10,310 --> 00:07:12,259
So can I get a new suit?
147
00:07:13,072 --> 00:07:14,751
I don't want to look raggedy.
148
00:07:15,340 --> 00:07:16,468
Raggedy?
149
00:07:17,170 --> 00:07:19,533
Oh, my baby is not going
to look raggedy.
150
00:07:19,620 --> 00:07:21,419
When I finish this, we'll go shopping.
151
00:07:21,540 --> 00:07:23,610
- Okay. Thanks, Mom.
- You're welcome, baby.
152
00:07:25,530 --> 00:07:26,734
Singing...
153
00:07:30,150 --> 00:07:32,413
That night, even my dreams were lucky.
154
00:07:39,560 --> 00:07:41,655
Calm down! Calm down.
155
00:07:42,581 --> 00:07:44,119
You scared the heck out of me.
156
00:07:44,177 --> 00:07:46,666
Listen, I'm just looking for the woods.
157
00:07:47,030 --> 00:07:48,655
Wait. You're not going to kill me?
158
00:07:48,934 --> 00:07:50,155
Why would I do that?
159
00:07:51,009 --> 00:07:52,625
Okay, you go downstairs,
make a left.
160
00:07:52,672 --> 00:07:54,282
Go down the corner,
make another left,
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00:07:54,317 --> 00:07:56,426
and there should be a park
about a mile away.
162
00:07:56,620 --> 00:07:57,653
Thanks.
163
00:07:57,970 --> 00:08:00,303
Hey, by the way,
you know the date?
164
00:08:01,017 --> 00:08:02,074
Thursday the 12th.
165
00:08:02,672 --> 00:08:03,706
Thanks.
166
00:08:05,360 --> 00:08:06,846
Later, I had one of those dreams
167
00:08:06,904 --> 00:08:09,593
where I was falling
and Jennifer Beals caught me.
168
00:08:21,570 --> 00:08:24,049
Where are my lucky socks?
Who took my lucky socks?
169
00:08:24,388 --> 00:08:25,529
Wasn't me.
170
00:08:25,637 --> 00:08:27,859
Those socks were stinking up
this whole room.
171
00:08:27,901 --> 00:08:29,392
I got them things out of here.
172
00:08:29,524 --> 00:08:31,708
You're lucky you didn't die
from the smell.
173
00:08:32,800 --> 00:08:34,598
Hey, that was a lucky scent
174
00:08:37,720 --> 00:08:39,649
After my mother got rid of my socks
175
00:08:39,750 --> 00:08:43,226
I imagined whoever was wearing them
was having a lot better luck than me.
176
00:08:57,320 --> 00:08:58,670
We are all out of soup.
177
00:08:59,906 --> 00:09:01,099
You got any whiskey?
178
00:09:01,156 --> 00:09:02,601
This is your lucky day.
179
00:09:04,560 --> 00:09:06,618
Sure glad y'all ran out of food.
180
00:09:12,810 --> 00:09:15,320
My husband just died of a heart attack!
181
00:09:16,500 --> 00:09:17,653
Tragic!
182
00:09:18,461 --> 00:09:21,538
Well, since he's dead,
want to go out to dinner?
183
00:09:22,840 --> 00:09:24,114
I could.
184
00:09:24,800 --> 00:09:26,145
Without my lucky socks,
185
00:09:26,200 --> 00:09:28,139
I probably should have studied
for that test.
186
00:09:28,187 --> 00:09:30,489
But that seemed a lot harder
than finding more luck.
187
00:09:30,540 --> 00:09:32,078
How much for just the foot?
188
00:09:36,210 --> 00:09:38,149
What the hell makes you think
I'm a leprechaun?
189
00:09:38,259 --> 00:09:39,856
- Let me go!
- No!
190
00:09:40,780 --> 00:09:43,953
Oh, Louise! I'm sorry!
191
00:09:44,335 --> 00:09:46,742
Hey, man,
can I have one of these horseshoes?
192
00:09:48,450 --> 00:09:50,799
Tonya and Drew thought
they had pulled it off.
193
00:09:50,869 --> 00:09:52,665
Then the "it" hit the fan.
194
00:09:53,166 --> 00:09:55,866
Tonya,
why are you moving furniture?
195
00:09:57,040 --> 00:09:59,473
Because Daddy's giving me pink carpet.
196
00:10:11,440 --> 00:10:12,502
Where'd you get that suit?
197
00:10:12,537 --> 00:10:14,779
- The Peach Suit Warehouse.
- Mama bought it for me.
198
00:10:14,868 --> 00:10:17,510
That's $63.72 worth of suit.
199
00:10:23,047 --> 00:10:25,888
I told Tonya
she couldn't have pink carpet.
200
00:10:26,168 --> 00:10:28,699
Why would you say yes
when I said no?
201
00:10:28,798 --> 00:10:30,399
I didn't know she asked you first.
202
00:10:30,453 --> 00:10:31,599
But what I want to know is,
203
00:10:31,661 --> 00:10:34,659
why you spent money on a suit
for Drew after I told him no?
204
00:10:34,712 --> 00:10:37,559
Well, if you had asked me,
I would have told you it was okay.
205
00:10:37,915 --> 00:10:38,929
Wait a minute.
206
00:10:39,012 --> 00:10:41,139
So when you say something's okay,
it's okay,
207
00:10:41,226 --> 00:10:43,280
but when I say something's okay,
it's not?!
208
00:10:43,570 --> 00:10:44,630
Sure.
209
00:10:45,680 --> 00:10:47,240
What kind of sense does that make?
210
00:10:47,440 --> 00:10:49,133
It makes perfect sense.
211
00:10:49,227 --> 00:10:51,969
And besides,
I am not going to have my baby on stage
212
00:10:52,045 --> 00:10:53,571
looking like he can't sing.
213
00:10:53,595 --> 00:10:55,630
Well, I'm not going to have
my baby walking around
214
00:10:55,654 --> 00:10:58,401
acting like she can't have
pink carpet on the floor.
215
00:10:59,148 --> 00:11:00,409
You know what? Fine.
216
00:11:00,476 --> 00:11:01,459
- Fine.
- Fine.
217
00:11:01,460 --> 00:11:03,434
- Nobody worried about you.
- About you either.
218
00:11:03,470 --> 00:11:04,919
Drew's plan was still working.
219
00:11:05,088 --> 00:11:07,229
My parents were so busy
fighting each other
220
00:11:07,340 --> 00:11:10,010
they forgot Tonya and Drew
should be the ones in trouble.
221
00:11:10,630 --> 00:11:13,189
It's too bad they didn't hear
the rest of that conversation.
222
00:11:13,220 --> 00:11:15,059
Wait, wait,
223
00:11:15,170 --> 00:11:16,755
wait a minute, Julius.
224
00:11:17,582 --> 00:11:19,238
I think we just been had.
225
00:11:20,206 --> 00:11:21,479
What are you talking about?
226
00:11:21,595 --> 00:11:24,483
Your kids just played us
against each other.
227
00:11:27,471 --> 00:11:28,569
Ain't this about a...
228
00:11:28,694 --> 00:11:30,021
Before you get mad,
229
00:11:30,381 --> 00:11:32,471
let's think about this for a minute.
230
00:11:32,942 --> 00:11:34,669
So whenever they ask us for something,
231
00:11:34,760 --> 00:11:36,287
let's come up with a system.
232
00:11:36,565 --> 00:11:37,798
What kind of system?
233
00:11:37,940 --> 00:11:39,138
This was their system.
234
00:11:39,652 --> 00:11:41,378
Daddy, can I have a popsicle?
235
00:11:41,800 --> 00:11:43,056
Go ask your mother.
236
00:11:43,238 --> 00:11:45,387
Hey, Dad, can I have a dollar?
237
00:11:46,260 --> 00:11:47,329
Go ask your mother.
238
00:11:47,665 --> 00:11:49,708
Dad, can I go to the hospital?
239
00:11:51,570 --> 00:11:52,803
Go ask your mother.
240
00:11:53,517 --> 00:11:54,503
Okay?
241
00:11:57,010 --> 00:11:58,171
That's my baby.
242
00:11:58,719 --> 00:11:59,879
Without my lucky socks
243
00:11:59,971 --> 00:12:03,212
I knew any chance of me doing good
on that test was history.
244
00:12:04,334 --> 00:12:06,318
Hey, man,
what's the matter?
245
00:12:07,370 --> 00:12:08,963
I lost your lucky socks.
246
00:12:11,340 --> 00:12:12,439
Chris...
247
00:12:14,790 --> 00:12:16,207
those socks aren't lucky.
248
00:12:16,801 --> 00:12:18,809
If they were lucky,
I'd still have my hair,
249
00:12:18,915 --> 00:12:20,359
I would have hit the number
250
00:12:20,922 --> 00:12:22,890
and I wouldn't still be
wearing a pair of socks
251
00:12:22,940 --> 00:12:24,524
I had when I met your mother.
252
00:12:24,681 --> 00:12:27,252
But I have a lot of big stuff
going on in school tomorrow.
253
00:12:27,367 --> 00:12:28,799
I need those socks.
254
00:12:31,370 --> 00:12:33,519
You need to make your own luck
in this world.
255
00:12:33,764 --> 00:12:37,474
Success comes from
opportunity and preparation.
256
00:12:37,750 --> 00:12:38,985
And being white.
257
00:12:39,091 --> 00:12:41,932
Do you think it was luck
when Rocky beat Mr. T?
258
00:12:42,250 --> 00:12:43,880
Do you think the Ghostbusters were lucky
259
00:12:43,930 --> 00:12:47,130
when they saved New York
from the Stay-Puff Marshmallow Man?
260
00:12:47,230 --> 00:12:48,910
Do you think Godzilla was lucky
261
00:12:48,960 --> 00:12:51,520
when he beat Ghidrah
the three-headed monster?
262
00:12:52,022 --> 00:12:54,182
I don't know. I guess not.
263
00:12:54,554 --> 00:12:55,940
That's right.
264
00:12:59,389 --> 00:13:02,136
Chris,
the only thing lucky about those socks
265
00:13:02,402 --> 00:13:04,798
is that I couldn't find
the matching pants.
266
00:13:05,201 --> 00:13:06,868
Now go find your own luck.
267
00:13:08,147 --> 00:13:09,638
You don't need those socks.
268
00:13:10,560 --> 00:13:11,670
Thanks.
269
00:13:11,720 --> 00:13:12,898
You're welcome.
270
00:13:16,596 --> 00:13:19,226
Talking to my father
always made me feel better.
271
00:13:19,285 --> 00:13:20,764
And maybe he was right.
272
00:13:20,858 --> 00:13:22,995
Maybe it wasn't the socks after all.
273
00:13:24,747 --> 00:13:25,903
Wrong
274
00:13:33,402 --> 00:13:34,893
Looks kind of crooked.
275
00:13:37,940 --> 00:13:39,444
That's better. Love it.
276
00:13:39,660 --> 00:13:41,122
That's my girl. Come here.
277
00:13:41,678 --> 00:13:44,719
Look, Tonya,
next time me or your mother say no,
278
00:13:44,789 --> 00:13:47,008
we mean no, got it?
279
00:13:47,225 --> 00:13:48,481
Yes, Daddy.
280
00:13:49,251 --> 00:13:50,220
Good.
281
00:13:50,270 --> 00:13:51,931
Meanwhile,
my mother had another way
282
00:13:51,943 --> 00:13:53,082
of getting her point across.
283
00:13:53,106 --> 00:13:55,404
The next time you ask me to do something
284
00:13:55,462 --> 00:13:56,883
after your father told you no,
285
00:13:56,989 --> 00:13:59,770
I'm going to pop the pores
off your face, do you understand me?
286
00:13:59,820 --> 00:14:00,883
Yes, ma'am.
287
00:14:01,739 --> 00:14:05,215
As for me, I was still
as lucky as a three-leaf clover.
288
00:14:05,438 --> 00:14:07,269
Hey, man, I forgot my bus pass again.
289
00:14:07,305 --> 00:14:08,590
Can I just go ahead?
290
00:14:08,640 --> 00:14:09,840
Yeah, you can just go ahead.
291
00:14:09,890 --> 00:14:12,330
You can just go ahead
and jog alongside the bus.
292
00:14:12,420 --> 00:14:14,007
Go on, go on.
293
00:14:16,305 --> 00:14:17,432
Kids.
294
00:14:17,561 --> 00:14:19,968
On the second bus,
my luck got worse.
295
00:14:20,656 --> 00:14:21,889
Hi, Darlene.
296
00:14:22,367 --> 00:14:23,517
Who are you?
297
00:14:23,588 --> 00:14:25,748
I'm... Chris. Remember?
298
00:14:26,065 --> 00:14:27,674
You said you liked my name.
299
00:14:27,932 --> 00:14:29,247
I really don't care.
300
00:14:29,720 --> 00:14:31,117
Who the hell do you think you are?
301
00:14:31,141 --> 00:14:32,444
Just because somebody sits down,
302
00:14:32,503 --> 00:14:34,079
doesn't mean you have
to talk to them.
303
00:14:34,114 --> 00:14:35,723
Do I look like I want to talk?
304
00:14:35,770 --> 00:14:37,766
And what the hell
kind of name is Chris anyway?
305
00:14:37,812 --> 00:14:39,714
What you need to do,
is you need to sit down,
306
00:14:39,761 --> 00:14:42,332
shut up and ride the bus
to wherever you got to go.
307
00:14:42,761 --> 00:14:44,099
And back at school...
308
00:14:48,570 --> 00:14:52,151
I hope everyone is prepared
for today's history quiz.
309
00:14:53,178 --> 00:14:57,218
And, Chris, I hope
you weren't too busy taking care
310
00:14:57,300 --> 00:15:00,140
of all of your half-brothers
and sisters to study.
311
00:15:04,050 --> 00:15:05,150
What's wrong?
312
00:15:05,200 --> 00:15:07,373
I didn't study
and I lost my lucky socks.
313
00:15:07,457 --> 00:15:08,760
Dude, you're toast.
314
00:15:08,786 --> 00:15:09,810
No, I'm not.
315
00:15:09,850 --> 00:15:12,131
Toast would get a better grade
on this quiz.
316
00:15:12,346 --> 00:15:16,080
But today we're going to do something
a little differently.
317
00:15:16,170 --> 00:15:19,892
Instead of a written exam,
it's going to be an oral exam.
318
00:15:20,960 --> 00:15:23,530
Chris...
you're so very well-spoken.
319
00:15:23,580 --> 00:15:25,146
Why don't you go first?
320
00:15:25,457 --> 00:15:27,160
Come up here in front of the class.
321
00:15:27,183 --> 00:15:28,733
I didn't have my lucky socks,
322
00:15:28,792 --> 00:15:31,680
and now I needed
a new pair of lucky underwear.
323
00:15:31,982 --> 00:15:33,778
Well, what did you want me
to talk about?
324
00:15:33,826 --> 00:15:36,104
I want you to talk about
people in history
325
00:15:36,450 --> 00:15:40,097
who have achieved their goals
against all odds.
326
00:15:40,510 --> 00:15:42,694
Do you know what goals are, Chris?
327
00:15:44,903 --> 00:15:46,688
I had no idea what to say.
328
00:15:46,950 --> 00:15:49,330
Without my lucky socks
and without studying
329
00:15:49,383 --> 00:15:51,027
I was in big, big trouble.
330
00:15:53,323 --> 00:15:56,282
Many people think that
when you succeed
331
00:15:56,318 --> 00:15:59,121
against all odds...
it's by luck.
332
00:16:00,229 --> 00:16:01,873
Well, I don't believe in luck.
333
00:16:02,023 --> 00:16:03,491
At least not anymore.
334
00:16:06,059 --> 00:16:08,947
I mean, was... was it lucky...
was it lucky when...
335
00:16:10,050 --> 00:16:11,662
when Rocky beat Mr. T?
336
00:16:12,450 --> 00:16:14,105
No, he prepared for it.
337
00:16:14,943 --> 00:16:17,655
He prepared by beating Apollo Creed.
338
00:16:18,503 --> 00:16:20,053
So now who pities the fool?
339
00:16:20,929 --> 00:16:24,228
Was it lucky
when Indiana Jones
340
00:16:24,263 --> 00:16:26,635
saved those kids
from the Temple of Doom?
341
00:16:26,996 --> 00:16:28,628
No, he prepared.
342
00:16:28,710 --> 00:16:31,552
He prepared by saving the world
in Raiders of the Lost Ark.
343
00:16:31,681 --> 00:16:34,191
I mean,
if you could save the whole world,
344
00:16:34,295 --> 00:16:37,043
it's not going to be too hard
to save a couple of kids.
345
00:16:37,163 --> 00:16:41,366
Was it lucky when King Kong
defeated those planes?
346
00:16:41,952 --> 00:16:44,500
No,'cause he didn't defeat the planes.
347
00:16:45,179 --> 00:16:47,891
They shot his behind
clear off the Empire State Building.
348
00:16:47,916 --> 00:16:49,980
Now if King Kong had spent some time
349
00:16:50,030 --> 00:16:51,369
learning how to fight some planes
350
00:16:51,404 --> 00:16:53,050
instead of chasing
a white girl around,
351
00:16:53,100 --> 00:16:55,566
he would be alive to this very day.
352
00:16:58,240 --> 00:17:01,620
Many people believe
that you can succeed against all odds.
353
00:17:01,930 --> 00:17:03,175
I don't believe that.
354
00:17:03,222 --> 00:17:06,486
I believe the odds are,
that if you don't prepare,
355
00:17:06,615 --> 00:17:08,118
you won't succeed.
356
00:17:08,590 --> 00:17:11,481
Yes! Yes! Yes!
357
00:17:16,348 --> 00:17:18,661
It turns out
I didn't need lucky socks.
358
00:17:18,852 --> 00:17:21,388
All I needed
was to listen to my father.
359
00:17:24,005 --> 00:17:25,919
The Lord had answered my prayers,
360
00:17:25,989 --> 00:17:28,584
and my mother was praying
he would answer hers.
361
00:17:32,991 --> 00:17:34,881
That was lovely, Christina.
362
00:17:35,160 --> 00:17:38,150
Okay, our next performer
is someone who is
363
00:17:38,200 --> 00:17:40,718
very popular here
at Dolemite Elementary.
364
00:17:41,260 --> 00:17:42,610
First there was Cher,
365
00:17:42,660 --> 00:17:46,000
then there was Madonna,
Sting, and Rockwell...
366
00:17:46,176 --> 00:17:49,147
Ladies and gentlemen,
I bring you Drew!
367
00:17:49,435 --> 00:17:51,040
That's my boy!
That's my baby!
368
00:17:53,100 --> 00:17:55,229
Oh, you look good. Look at my boy!
369
00:17:55,981 --> 00:17:57,789
Look at the little girls.
370
00:17:59,760 --> 00:18:02,663
Drew couldn't sing,
but he lip-synched like an angel.
371
00:18:12,520 --> 00:18:14,390
Ma, look, he's lip-synching.
372
00:18:14,440 --> 00:18:16,613
I know, isn't it great? Thank God.
373
00:18:22,739 --> 00:18:24,980
Go ahead, girl,
you can go up there, too.
374
00:18:29,244 --> 00:18:31,077
That's my baby!
375
00:18:31,219 --> 00:18:33,438
Man, this kid is incredible.
376
00:18:35,425 --> 00:18:36,990
Even before video
377
00:18:37,090 --> 00:18:39,150
Drew learned the secret
to being a good singer
378
00:18:39,240 --> 00:18:40,620
is to not sing at all.
379
00:18:42,944 --> 00:18:46,419
Goodness.
Oh, Drew, you were great.
380
00:18:46,614 --> 00:18:48,669
You looked great,
you danced great
381
00:18:48,693 --> 00:18:50,912
and your lip-synching--
oh, thank goodness.
382
00:18:50,947 --> 00:18:53,225
I mean,
you were really incredible, baby.
383
00:18:53,272 --> 00:18:55,140
You didn't think
I was going to sing, did you?
384
00:18:55,174 --> 00:18:56,665
Mama, I can't sing.
385
00:18:56,816 --> 00:18:57,884
We know.
386
00:18:57,916 --> 00:18:59,080
Hush, Tonya.
387
00:18:59,130 --> 00:19:01,149
Now go on upstairs
and take off that suit.
388
00:19:01,220 --> 00:19:03,298
And hang it up if it's not too smelly.
389
00:19:03,390 --> 00:19:06,302
Hey, man,
how'd it go without the socks today?
390
00:19:06,657 --> 00:19:09,534
Well, everything is back
to being as bad as usual.
391
00:19:09,950 --> 00:19:11,724
But I did get an "A"
on my history test.
392
00:19:11,865 --> 00:19:12,870
"A"?
393
00:19:12,930 --> 00:19:14,153
That's great.
394
00:19:14,214 --> 00:19:15,258
I'm proud of you.
395
00:19:15,305 --> 00:19:17,125
Well, I did have a pretty good teacher.
396
00:19:17,249 --> 00:19:19,280
Here, boy, here's your socks.
397
00:19:20,202 --> 00:19:21,858
I thought you said
you got rid of them.
398
00:19:21,905 --> 00:19:23,396
I just wanted to clean them.
399
00:19:23,950 --> 00:19:25,277
You going to put them on?
400
00:19:25,575 --> 00:19:27,712
No, I don't think so.
401
00:19:28,550 --> 00:19:30,680
I don't need them anymore. Here.
402
00:19:34,450 --> 00:19:38,610
Well, I guess I could keep them
for just a little while longer.
403
00:19:38,843 --> 00:19:40,170
You know, just in case.
404
00:19:40,296 --> 00:19:42,140
Yeah, just in case.
405
00:19:42,341 --> 00:19:45,653
Yeah, just in case
the circus comes back in town.
406
00:19:47,660 --> 00:19:49,710
I wasn't prepared
to spend the rest of my life
407
00:19:49,742 --> 00:19:51,609
at the mercy of a pair of socks.
408
00:19:51,751 --> 00:19:53,771
Any luck from this point forward,
409
00:19:53,806 --> 00:19:55,391
I would make on my own.
410
00:20:05,629 --> 00:20:08,832
YDY/Birdyben/Sixe
411
00:20:08,882 --> 00:20:13,432
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