All language subtitles for King of the Hill s04e23 Transnational Amusements.eng

[THEME SONG]

PEGGY: Okey-dokey. Now, we'll be
with Dale and Nancy at Chef Ling's.

I don't know the number,

but if there's any problem,
just penetrate the Gribbles' perimeter.

The alarm company will page them.

I don't need a baby-sitter.

Bobby, Luanne is
not here to baby-sit.

She is here because
she misses you,

and she wants to
spend time with you.

No, I...

[DOORBELL RINGS]

You'll get the other half when we get back.

HANK:
My turn.

Change of plans.
The reservations fell through.

We're gonna eat in the alley tonight.

The bowling alley!

What? No. I don't think...

I am not much of a bowler.

This shirt would beg to differ.

Look at yours, Hank.

"Flamer" for the propane man.

I guess I could have gone
with "Propane Man."

No. Flamer is cooler.

Look at yours, sug'.
It says, "Spare Peg."

I started with "Square Peg"
and then I gave it a twist.

And then Nancy said
"spare" was a bowling term.

So it works on both levels.

All right. This was very thoughtful,
but, really, I'm not much of a bowler.

Maybe we could wear them
to the movies, or--

Come on, Peggy.

The Gribbles are gonna think
you don't like them.

He's right, Peggy.

What do you have against my wife?

HANK:
Men's 12.

- Gent's 12.
- Men's nine, 42 European.

Ladies' five, sug'.

EMPLOYEE:
Gent's nine, gal size five.

[PINS CLATTERING]

EMPLOYEE:
Ma'am?

[PEGGY MURMURS]

The man needs to
know your shoe size.

I'm sure he does.
And I will tell it to him.

Why don't you go pick your shoes up,
and I will be with you shortly?

EMPLOYEE:
Shoe size, ma'am.

Look, I am willing to pay
your shoe-rental fee.

But I would like to bowl
in my own shoes, please.

Sorry, those aren't bowling shoes.

I can't let you on the lanes.

Come on, Peggy. We're putting
our nicknames up on the screen.

It's a lot of fun.

I am a size 16.

I'm sorry.
I thought you said size 16.

I did.

Oh, my God!
No one's ever asked for those before.

[TENSE INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]

[DRAMATIC INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]

EMPLOYEE:
Just give me a few minutes.

PEGGY: All right, Hank,
I'm just gonna go check on Bobby.

[SOLEMN INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]

But, Mommy,
I want my Mary Janes.

Peggy, it's not my fault
your feet are growing and you're not.

I found something that can fit her.

Nurse's shoes?

[YOUNG PEGGY SOBBING]

Watch your feet.

[PEGGY GASPS]

I'm looking for something
in a woman's size 16 bowling shoe

that says "eight" on the back.

No, I think you're looking
for a size sixteen-and-a-half

that says "eight" on the back.

Sixteen and a half? No.

No. I have been a size 16
since I was just a little girl.

It's actually quite common

for a woman's feet to keep growing
as she gets older.

They're getting bigger? Oh, God!

Yeah. At this rate I'd say
you've got a shot at the big two-o.

[GASPS]

[CRYING]

WOMAN:
Hello? It's okay.

It really is.

Oh, please!
Spare me your psychobabble.

I know exactly how you feel.

Honey, there's a man
you should talk to.

He can make you feel good
about your feet.

I don't hide mine anymore.

PEGGY:
Grant Trimble?

TRIMBLE:
Again.

One more time.

TRIMBLE: Have you ever
have back problems?

PEGGY:
No.

Of course not.
I'll bet you're a gifted athlete.

Well, I am one of the best
softball pitchers in the tri-towns.

That's because you have
really, really amazing feet.

They're long enough
to give you a perfect stride

and wide enough
to root you firmly on the ground.

I don't even have to ask
if you're a professional success.

I have three-peated the
Substitute-Teacher of the Year Award

at Tom Landry Middle School.

I would have been surprised
if you'd said otherwise.

Wait. Are you saying
that I owe my success to the fact

that my feet are so big?

Some might see them as big.

I see them as vibrant and alive.

They're also very hot.

Well, no one has ever
told me that before,

about my feet.

I have heard that before
about my eyes and my teeth.

Peggy, how would you like
to help others in your situation?

We're making a small inspirational film.

It's for all those people out there
who have foot issues.

We need to take them to a place

where they can feel better
about themselves.

Would you...

Could you appear in it?

Mr. Trimble, I've never let my feet
be photographed before. I--

Please, Peggy.
You have an exceptional gift.

Wouldn't it be wrong of you
not to share it with the world?

[SOFT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]

I can see how it might be. Yes.

[LIVELY INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]

Oh, yeah.

- Wonderful work, Peggy.
- Thank you.

Now go over there
and walk in some mud.

It's spa-grade, I assure you.

Guess what I did today.

Worked up an appetite for steak,
I hope.

Yep. I starred in a short film.

Hold on. Let me just...

Okay. So, tell me about it.

I was discovered in a parking lot,
just like Lana Turner.

And now I'm gonna star
in an educational video,

which Lana Turner
was never asked to do.

That's great.
I'll get to see my wife in a movie.

Actually, it's not
really me in the film.

It's mainly my feet.

HANK: Everyone has to start somewhere.
What's it about?

It is an empowerment video
for people in the foot community.

The director, who is a genius,
filmed me getting a foot massage

and soaking my feet in butter,

stimulating my soles
with a ping pong paddle.

Hank, he may even
distribute it on the Internet.

HANK:
The Internet?

Tell me, does a big movie star like you
still like her steaks medium-rare?

[HANK HUMMING]

[CLEARING THROAT]

Hank, I got something
you should take a look at.

And you might want to bring
a valid credit card with you.

[BILL CHUCKLES]

All right, what's so funny?

If it's that Tweety Bird made of X's,
I've already seen it.

Hank, welcome to Peggysfeet.com.

Wait a minute.
Is that a pornographic website?

It's not a pornographic website.
It's a fetish website.

And those are Peggy's feet.

Those aren't... Now...

ANNOUNCER:
You've got feet.

PEGGY:
Oh, yeah.

- What the heck is that?
- Ping pong paddle.

Peggy's been a bad, bad girl.

PEGGY:
Oh, yeah.

Oh, my God!

[SOBER INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]

PEGGY:
Oh, yeah.

Dang it, Dale, turn that thing off!

Just testing my new sound card.

I tell you what, man.
It all starting to make sense, man,

how you can afford
that old shop vac, man.

For God's sakes, Boomhauer!

You've known Peggy
longer than I have.

She respects herself
and hates her feet too much

to ever show up on
something like this.

DALE [SHUSHING]:
Here comes the fondue.

HANK:
No, it doesn't.

[DALE EXCLAIMS]

[OMINOUS INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]

PEGGY: And so, I have finally taken
my own advice

to combine my love of education
with my interest in edutainment.

But why are they only making videos
of your feet?

Very good question.

You may not have noticed
because I wear bold eyeglasses

to draw the attention to my head.

But your mother has
exceptionally long and handsome feet.

[GROANS]

And up until now,

I had been tricked by the media
into thinking that they were unattractive.

Who? Who in the media tricked you?

Bobby, I don't know their names.

It's more of a conspiracy.

There's my movie star.

[LAUGHS NERVOUSLY]

- Bobby, can you go watch TV?
- Can I!

So, Peggy, if I wanted
to shake the hand

of the director of this...

Where would I go to wait for him
to shake his hand?

Director, writer, cameraman,
Grant Trimble does it all.

He has his own motion picture warehouse
out by the truck scales.

HANK:
I'll be right back.

- Are you the tickler?
- [SIGHS] No.

Hello? Anyone there?

Hello? Trimble?

- HANK: Trimble!
- TRIMBLE: This is a closed set.

Trimble, I want you to stay away
from my wife.

- TRIMBLE: And who's your wife?
- HANK: Mrs. Peggy Hill.

Then you're a very lucky man.

But I'm afraid we're
gonna have to share.

You, sir, are nothing
but a low-rent smut hound,

and you're gonna delete
my wife's feet from your Internet

before she finds out
what you've done with them.

What I've done with them?
I've made them stars.

You made them wade
through pork and beans!

This isn't about
individual artistic decisions.

It's about something bigger than you,
or me, or any of us.

It's about a world wired together.

A future where,
at the click of a mouse,

a dream can start in Arlen

and end on a computer
in Johannesburg.

The generations joined,
united under the banner of a single ideal:

women's big, beautiful feet.

It's about an end to strife
and misunderstanding.

One world, one dream, one peace.

[SIGHING]
You leave me with no choice.

I'm gonna have to kick your ass.

Hold on. Let me
turn on the camera.

- Sorry.
- No, Hank.

No more painting my toenails
alone in the dark.

I don't care who sees!

[SIGHING]

Peggy, there's something
I want to show you on your computer.

HANK: This is an Internet site
called Peggysfeet.com.

I think that is wonderful.

Now women who are too embarrassed
to even go to the doctor

can be inspired by my feet
in the privacy of their own homes.

Peggy, your feet are
stepping on raw hamburger.

Yes. Mr. Trimble says that that is
a common European beauty treatment.

Here's some honey
being poured all over them.

PEGGY:
It tones the pores.

Yeah, and now a bunch of flies
get stuck to them.

Okay. Now, that was a mistake.

- Here's where you can buy the flies.
- They're selling the flies?

Well, I'm sure the money goes
to important foot-related charities.

Your socks are for sale, too.

HANK:
Peggy, they're foot-fetish videos.

Oh, my God.

Don't feel too bad.

Bill says a lot of college girls
get caught up in the dirty Internet world.

I'll give you some time.

[SAD INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]

[PEGGY CLEARS THROAT]

PEGGY:
Grant?

GRANT:
Peggy, what a terrific surprise!

I hope you brought your swim trunks.

I am not here to swim, Trimble.

I know what you're up to.

I have it on good authority, my own,

that you have been exploiting my feet
for unseemly purposes.

You have a computer.

Yes. I also have a moral compass
that always points to good.

All right, Peggy.
I understand you're a little annoyed.

We were shooting
for the women's-empowerment market.

But as it turns out, women
were not as interested as we'd hoped.

We did, however, find an audience.

And it was men.

I was ready to pull the plug
on Peggysfeet.com.

- But then I realized something.
- Yes?

Have you ever seen
a pair of big, beautiful feet like yours

in Playboy magazine, Peggy?

No, not on the cover.

And I certainly wouldn't open it
because I do not read pornography.

Let's use a Gap ad. Have you ever
seen them in a Gap ad? Ever?

- No.
- That's right. You haven't.

But what if someone, alone at first,

was out there
appreciating big, beautiful feet?

I mean, loving them,
the way they deserve.

Pretty soon you'd see them
in music videos.

Then Hollywood movies.

TRIMBLE:
And before too long,

on 60-foot billboards across America,
pushing Parker pens.

So, really, what you're saying is,

I will be helping create a better world
for men and women?

I'd be like Rosa Parks.

This website is your bus, Peggy.
Ride it to freedom.

[TRIUMPHANT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]

But you said the movies
were just for women.

Well, honey, ultimately they are.

But first we must reach the men.

All right. How can I put this
so you'll understand?

Bobby, some men
like ladies' bottoms.

And other men like ladies' bosoms.

And a small, small number,
too few, love ladies' big feet.

Now, Mommy is trying
to increase that number

and thus help women everywhere.

How does this help
the women with the big boobies?

They don't need any more help.

Hank, I am going to my book club.

We are reading
The Hunt for Red October,

which, luckily, I read 12 years ago.

That's why you haven't seen me
reading it recently. Okay?

I will be at Becky Bankey's house.

She does not have a phone,
or a cell phone, or a telegraph.

[DOOR CLOSES]

Okay, then.

TRIMBLE:
Beautiful, beautiful.

Oh, yeah. Cut.

Now let's rinse you off
and move on to some more eggs.

More eggs?
But we've done so many eggs.

How about if my feet
are on a silken cushion?

I see you have one.

That could be good. But wait.

How about if your feet
are next to a rotting jack-o-lantern?

Sort of a Beauty and the Beast thing.

Well, I've always thought
I should play Beauty.

And you will. Inner beauty.

Inner beauty.

Good morning, Grant.
I brought coffee.

[EXCLAIMS]
Still hot.

That'll burn your feet.
Are you ready for that?

What? No. That's for you, to drink.

I did have an idea, though,
which is why I brought the flowers.

How about surrounding my beautiful feet
with beautiful flowers?

I figured we did Beauty and the Beast.

PEGGY: How about
"Beauty Finally Meets Her Match"?

Flowers smell good.
That's not gonna work.

What's wrong with smelling good?

People like feet that smell good.

Tell you what. We'll compromise
with a tub of corned beef hash.

No, Grant. That's just more food.

I brought these flowers from my own yard.
They're so pretty--

I've been around this business
for long enough to know what works.

No one wants pretty.

They want spinach, eggs,
and corned beef hash.

For some reason,
they don't like them together. Go figure.

Well, of course they want pretty.
They want my feet.

You said so yourself.

All right. You're a smart woman.

All the girls figure it out eventually.
That's when I start paying.

What?

It's $200 for a
five-minute smush video.

We shoot 10 a day.
I'm gonna need your social.

I bet you never thought
those big, ugly feet of yours

could buy you a fur coat.

You think my feet are ugly?

Let's be honest, Peggy.
You know your feet are ugly.

That's what a certain type
of very self-hating individual

will pay top dollar to see.

Now, let's fire up those stompers
and make some dirty.

[SEDUCTIVE INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]

What?

[PEGGY CRYING]

[PEGGY CRYING]

DALE:
Peggy's home.

Hey, Peggy.
Can I fix you a sandwich?

- Hank, I went back to Grant Trimble's.
- What?

I feel so stupid.

It turns out the only ones who want
to look at my ugly feet are perverts.

And the perverts only like my feet
because they're so big and ugly.

That's what I've been trying to tell you.
They're fetishists.

That means they obsess
on one weird little thing.

[SIGHING]

Look, I'll never love your feet
as much as they do.

But the way I look at it,
you're like a fully loaded truck.

The big tires are
part of the package.

You pay extra to get
those really big tires.

Now, why are you crying?
You know how much I want a new truck.

[PEGGY CONTINUES CRYING]

DOCTOR: I don't see any problems
with your feet.

- They're perfectly healthy.
- Very good.

Now, what I would like

is for you to smash them with a hammer
and then reset them

until they're a size five.

[STAMMERING]
I'm sorry. We don't do that.

[PEACEFUL INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]

[CHILDREN CHATTERING]

Mom, aren't you shooting
some foot movies tonight?

PEGGY:
No, Bobby, never again.

- Artistic differences?
- No.

Well... No.

PEGGY: All that stuff I told you
about empowerment? It was all lies.

The whole time
I was making smush videos.

And they only wanted me
for my ugly feet.

- That was mean of them.
- You don't understand, Bobby.

I actually let myself believe
that these were beautiful.

Can you imagine?
Peggy Hill, that stupid.

I can imagine, Mom. I'm fat.

Oh, no. No, honey, you're husky.
It says so on your jeans.

Mom. I'm fat. But big deal.

I don't feel bad about it.
You never made me feel bad about it.

And just because
there's some people in the world

who want me to feel bad about it,
doesn't mean I have to.

So Bobby Hill's fat.

BOBBY:
He's also funny, he's nice.

He's got a lot of friends, a girlfriend.

And, if you don't mind,

I think I'll go outside right now
and squirt her with water.

What are you gonna do?

[TENSE INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]

- HANK: Men's 12.
- DALE: Men's nine.

Ladies' five, sug'.

Gent's twelve and nine.
Gal's size five.

My name is Peggy Hill,

and I will take a
size sixteen-and-a-half.

We don't need to know your name.
We just need your shoes.

Fine. Sixteen-and-a-half.

MAN:
I think I saw her on a website.

[THEME SONG]

BOBBY: Who? Who in the media
tricked you?

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