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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:05,672 --> 00:00:07,538 [THEME SONG] 2 00:00:32,499 --> 00:00:35,764 [GENTLE INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC] 3 00:00:42,276 --> 00:00:43,801 Morning, Dale. 4 00:00:46,513 --> 00:00:48,948 - DALE: Hi, John Redcorn. - JOHN: Dale. 5 00:00:56,123 --> 00:00:57,682 Morning, John Redcorn. 6 00:00:58,325 --> 00:01:01,784 Peggy. Just dropping off a new healing herb for Nancy, 7 00:01:01,895 --> 00:01:04,296 to help with her migraines. Ginkgo biloba. 8 00:01:04,398 --> 00:01:06,492 Yeah, sure, I've heard of that. 9 00:01:11,405 --> 00:01:14,864 [ROCK-AND-ROLL PLAYING ON STEREO] 10 00:01:17,344 --> 00:01:18,311 [CHUCKLING] 11 00:01:18,812 --> 00:01:21,440 Well, you must be reading Doyle Harcavy. 12 00:01:21,548 --> 00:01:23,380 What's he got for us this morning? 13 00:01:23,483 --> 00:01:25,535 "When it comes to starting the day, 14 00:01:25,659 --> 00:01:27,784 nothing wakes me up faster than coffee." 15 00:01:28,855 --> 00:01:30,687 Boy, he's got that right. 16 00:01:32,259 --> 00:01:36,059 "They say children are a blessing, but mine are holy terrors." 17 00:01:39,266 --> 00:01:41,234 Doyle Harcavy knows children. 18 00:01:41,335 --> 00:01:43,804 Of course, his daughter jumped out a window. 19 00:01:47,908 --> 00:01:49,000 [SIGHING] 20 00:01:51,645 --> 00:01:55,479 I don't believe it. Doyle Harcavy is retiring from the musings column. 21 00:01:55,582 --> 00:01:56,572 No. 22 00:01:56,683 --> 00:02:00,176 He's going to write product descriptions for Bradley Air and Heat. 23 00:02:00,278 --> 00:02:02,439 I don't know how they'll ever replace him. 24 00:02:02,522 --> 00:02:03,655 I know how. 25 00:02:03,757 --> 00:02:06,783 You can write that column, Aunt Peggy. You're a natural. 26 00:02:06,893 --> 00:02:09,954 Now, Luanne, Peggy has a musing now and then, 27 00:02:10,063 --> 00:02:12,657 but Doyle Harcavy is a musing machine. 28 00:02:12,766 --> 00:02:15,326 I think I could do it as well as anyone else could. 29 00:02:15,435 --> 00:02:17,961 I play Boggle, and that takes verbal ability. 30 00:02:18,071 --> 00:02:20,733 And I'm always making observations all day long. 31 00:02:20,841 --> 00:02:24,004 - Really? Go ahead. Come up with one. - You mean right now? 32 00:02:24,578 --> 00:02:27,047 Okay. All right. Well, let's see. 33 00:02:27,447 --> 00:02:29,575 [MUTTERING] 34 00:02:30,384 --> 00:02:33,046 I like milk. 35 00:02:34,321 --> 00:02:36,813 Hey, that's the best so far. 36 00:02:36,923 --> 00:02:38,448 Do one about cookies. 37 00:02:50,070 --> 00:02:51,037 [SIGHING] 38 00:02:56,710 --> 00:02:57,677 No. 39 00:02:59,613 --> 00:03:00,876 Stupid. 40 00:03:02,683 --> 00:03:04,014 Too obvious. 41 00:03:04,785 --> 00:03:07,880 Why don't you try some out on me? Give me your five best. 42 00:03:08,021 --> 00:03:11,924 I cannot work with you coming in here every two hours and yelling at me. 43 00:03:12,125 --> 00:03:13,092 [EXHALING] 44 00:03:13,293 --> 00:03:15,159 I'm going to Nancy's. 45 00:03:21,501 --> 00:03:23,765 [ROCK-AND-ROLL PLAYING ON STEREO] 46 00:03:23,970 --> 00:03:25,199 Nancy. 47 00:03:25,572 --> 00:03:26,903 [MOANING] 48 00:03:29,609 --> 00:03:30,576 Nancy! 49 00:03:30,977 --> 00:03:32,172 PEGGY: Hello. 50 00:03:32,579 --> 00:03:34,013 Where are you? 51 00:03:34,114 --> 00:03:35,377 [MUSIC STOPS] 52 00:03:35,482 --> 00:03:36,449 Nancy. 53 00:03:37,217 --> 00:03:38,184 Nancy. 54 00:03:41,722 --> 00:03:42,712 [GENTLE MUSIC PLAYING] 55 00:03:42,823 --> 00:03:45,292 There you are. Hello, John Redcorn. 56 00:03:45,392 --> 00:03:48,157 Yes, we were just back here. 57 00:03:49,396 --> 00:03:51,228 I just had to get out of that house. 58 00:03:51,331 --> 00:03:54,266 I am trying to do some creative work, and Hank seems to think 59 00:03:54,367 --> 00:03:57,234 that he's helping by making me more and more stressed-out. 60 00:03:57,337 --> 00:03:59,396 It is giving me a whopping headache. 61 00:03:59,506 --> 00:04:01,941 Yes. Headaches can often be caused by stress. 62 00:04:02,042 --> 00:04:05,774 Of course, John Redcorn. You're a licensed New Age healer. 63 00:04:05,879 --> 00:04:08,678 Why don't I try a healing session with you? 64 00:04:08,782 --> 00:04:09,874 [HESITATING] 65 00:04:10,016 --> 00:04:12,849 I guess that would be all right. It is my job. 66 00:04:12,953 --> 00:04:16,218 That would be great. Okay, I'll call you for an appointment. 67 00:04:21,394 --> 00:04:24,295 That was awkward. What kind of game is she playing? 68 00:04:24,397 --> 00:04:26,729 Sug', I don't think she knows about us. 69 00:04:26,867 --> 00:04:28,625 Peggy's got such a trusting nature. 70 00:04:28,702 --> 00:04:30,895 She always believes the best in people. 71 00:04:31,505 --> 00:04:34,167 You know, all of a sudden, I feel dirty. 72 00:04:35,442 --> 00:04:37,934 - NANCY: I'm gonna take a shower. - JOHN: I'll join you. 73 00:04:44,017 --> 00:04:45,143 [CAR ALARM BEEPING] 74 00:04:56,730 --> 00:04:58,630 PEGGY: Isn't this lovely. 75 00:04:58,865 --> 00:05:02,028 I wasn't expecting carpet. I was expecting... 76 00:05:02,502 --> 00:05:05,096 I don't know what I was expecting. Not carpet. 77 00:05:05,305 --> 00:05:06,830 Peggy, relax. 78 00:05:09,276 --> 00:05:10,766 PEGGY: What an interesting chair. 79 00:05:10,877 --> 00:05:14,279 When I'm sitting in a chair, I never know quite what to do with my head. 80 00:05:14,381 --> 00:05:15,780 So this is wonderful. 81 00:05:15,882 --> 00:05:18,044 Thank you. It's from Brookstone. 82 00:05:19,553 --> 00:05:20,520 [MOANING] 83 00:05:22,055 --> 00:05:23,022 [CAR ALARM BEEPING] 84 00:05:24,224 --> 00:05:25,988 [WHALES SQUEALING ON STEREO] 85 00:05:26,226 --> 00:05:30,254 The whales sing of joy and sorrow, of gain and loss... 86 00:05:31,231 --> 00:05:32,824 like LeAnn Rimes. 87 00:05:33,333 --> 00:05:34,767 [MOANING] 88 00:05:37,470 --> 00:05:39,063 Now, there. 89 00:05:39,172 --> 00:05:41,402 Now lie quietly for as long as you want 90 00:05:41,508 --> 00:05:44,170 while I copy both sides of your insurance card. 91 00:05:48,682 --> 00:05:50,081 [SNORING] 92 00:05:51,751 --> 00:05:55,119 Peggy's gonna have a hard time replacing Doyle Harcavy. 93 00:05:55,222 --> 00:05:56,451 That guy's amazing. 94 00:05:56,556 --> 00:05:59,651 You look at his picture in the paper, he never gets a day older. 95 00:05:59,759 --> 00:06:02,820 She has to mail in a sample column this week. 96 00:06:03,129 --> 00:06:06,656 But she'll muse circles around him if she can just get past her headaches. 97 00:06:06,766 --> 00:06:08,825 Those headaches are good as gone. 98 00:06:08,935 --> 00:06:11,597 Peggy went to John Redcorn for a healing. 99 00:06:11,705 --> 00:06:12,695 What? 100 00:06:12,806 --> 00:06:16,436 Don't worry, old John R will fix her up just like he does for Nancy, 101 00:06:16,543 --> 00:06:18,272 three times a week. 102 00:06:18,445 --> 00:06:19,606 BILL: Oh, Hank, 103 00:06:19,746 --> 00:06:24,616 I'm sure Peggy's headache is nowhere near as serious as Nancy's. 104 00:06:24,985 --> 00:06:27,579 I tell you what, man. You don't want to know. 105 00:06:27,687 --> 00:06:29,917 I can't even know what it is with you. 106 00:06:30,023 --> 00:06:31,821 Don't worry about Peggy. 107 00:06:31,925 --> 00:06:34,155 She does not have the same kind of... 108 00:06:34,961 --> 00:06:38,261 medical condition that's causing Dale's wife 109 00:06:38,365 --> 00:06:41,426 to suffer unduly. Where is she? 110 00:06:43,236 --> 00:06:44,203 [EXHALING] 111 00:06:49,609 --> 00:06:53,671 [SINGING] ? Everything is beautiful In its own way ? 112 00:06:54,881 --> 00:06:56,144 Hi, Hank. 113 00:06:56,683 --> 00:06:59,983 Peggy. I guess dinner's gonna be a little late tonight. 114 00:07:00,220 --> 00:07:01,312 [PEGGY SIGHING] 115 00:07:01,655 --> 00:07:04,556 I just had a headache session with John Redcorn. 116 00:07:04,658 --> 00:07:07,093 He lit some sweetgrass and then I drifted off. 117 00:07:07,193 --> 00:07:10,322 The next thing I knew I felt fan-freaking-tastic. 118 00:07:11,531 --> 00:07:13,090 Good. Your headache's gone. 119 00:07:13,300 --> 00:07:16,292 Then I guess you're all done with John-freaking-Redcorn. 120 00:07:16,403 --> 00:07:18,098 No, this is just the beginning. 121 00:07:18,204 --> 00:07:21,174 I have already scheduled another treatment for next week. 122 00:07:21,274 --> 00:07:24,574 Peggy. I don't know how some guy rubbing your neck helps your head. 123 00:07:24,678 --> 00:07:26,578 I mean, what's the connection? 124 00:07:27,080 --> 00:07:28,775 My reporter's instincts tell me 125 00:07:28,882 --> 00:07:31,408 someone's a little grumpy without his dinner. 126 00:07:33,086 --> 00:07:34,645 I just got my first musing: 127 00:07:34,754 --> 00:07:37,189 "My husband calls me his better half, 128 00:07:37,290 --> 00:07:40,590 because I better half dinner on the table when he gets home." 129 00:07:40,794 --> 00:07:43,593 I'm gonna go write that up while it's still fresh. 130 00:07:47,267 --> 00:07:50,293 - What's wrong, Uncle Hank? - Nothing's wrong. 131 00:07:50,403 --> 00:07:53,930 It's good news. Peggy had her headache cured by John Redcorn. 132 00:07:54,040 --> 00:07:55,007 [GASPS] 133 00:07:55,141 --> 00:07:59,305 Stop that. Put your face back the way it was before somebody sees you. 134 00:07:59,412 --> 00:08:02,109 - What's wrong, Luanne? - Nothing's wrong, Bobby. 135 00:08:02,215 --> 00:08:05,241 Now go play outside. Dinner's gonna be a little late. 136 00:08:05,352 --> 00:08:06,319 [GASPS] 137 00:08:11,691 --> 00:08:13,682 Hank, would you like a beer? 138 00:08:13,793 --> 00:08:16,524 This is not a social call, John Redcorn. 139 00:08:16,629 --> 00:08:20,463 I think I know why you're here. Your wife came to me with a headache. 140 00:08:20,567 --> 00:08:22,092 A real headache. 141 00:08:22,202 --> 00:08:23,294 Her head actually hurt. 142 00:08:23,636 --> 00:08:27,402 I know that. But as I recall, that's how it started with Nancy Gribble. 143 00:08:27,507 --> 00:08:29,168 Hank, you are my friend. 144 00:08:29,476 --> 00:08:33,504 I promise I would never heal your wife the way I heal the wives of others. 145 00:08:33,613 --> 00:08:37,106 You better not. Because if you lay one unprofessional hand on Peggy, 146 00:08:37,217 --> 00:08:39,049 I'm gonna kick your ass. 147 00:08:39,419 --> 00:08:40,853 [WIND BLOWING] 148 00:08:43,590 --> 00:08:44,716 I will. 149 00:08:45,091 --> 00:08:46,923 [PEGGY AND NANCY LAUGHING] 150 00:08:47,093 --> 00:08:49,562 Oh, my Lord. Hank, I got it. 151 00:08:49,653 --> 00:08:51,347 They are giving me the musings column. 152 00:08:51,431 --> 00:08:52,927 Thank God. 153 00:08:53,400 --> 00:08:56,461 You got the job. The pressure's off. No more headaches, right? 154 00:08:56,569 --> 00:08:59,129 Are you kidding? I have weekly deadlines now. 155 00:08:59,231 --> 00:09:01,825 I'll have to schedule a regular night with John Redcorn. 156 00:09:01,913 --> 00:09:03,325 What? No. 157 00:09:03,418 --> 00:09:06,242 You don't need John Redcorn to get rid of a headache. 158 00:09:06,479 --> 00:09:08,607 Here. I'll give you a massage. 159 00:09:09,282 --> 00:09:10,545 [PEGGY WINCING] 160 00:09:11,017 --> 00:09:13,008 Just let me know where you really need it. 161 00:09:13,119 --> 00:09:14,280 That's my kidneys. 162 00:09:14,387 --> 00:09:17,550 Breathe. Picture a wide-open field. 163 00:09:18,024 --> 00:09:19,992 Throw some birds in there if you want. 164 00:09:20,093 --> 00:09:23,028 Hank, stop it. You're just pinching, slapping, and poking me. 165 00:09:23,129 --> 00:09:25,393 What is it that you have against John Redcorn? 166 00:09:25,482 --> 00:09:29,180 Don't make me say it. You know what he does to his clients. 167 00:09:29,352 --> 00:09:31,025 You think he's overcharging me? 168 00:09:31,092 --> 00:09:33,100 For your information, I checked around. 169 00:09:33,206 --> 00:09:36,972 He is less expensive than both VIP and Oriental Massage. 170 00:09:37,477 --> 00:09:39,571 For God sakes, Peggy, come on. 171 00:09:39,779 --> 00:09:43,215 It's taken him 13 years to cure Nancy's headache. 172 00:09:43,316 --> 00:09:44,647 So you're saying... 173 00:09:44,751 --> 00:09:47,516 What are you... You're calling him a quack? 174 00:09:47,620 --> 00:09:49,782 You're saying his methods aren't effective? 175 00:09:49,889 --> 00:09:52,324 HANK: No. I'm saying they're very effective. 176 00:09:52,425 --> 00:09:54,655 Come on, you know what I'm talking about. 177 00:09:54,761 --> 00:09:57,890 Nancy. John Redcorn. Joseph. 178 00:10:07,474 --> 00:10:08,942 Good God! 179 00:10:14,547 --> 00:10:17,517 I just cannot believe that I could be so stupid. 180 00:10:17,617 --> 00:10:21,144 How could you not tell me what was going on in my own side yard? 181 00:10:21,254 --> 00:10:23,814 I thought you knew. How could you not know? 182 00:10:23,923 --> 00:10:26,756 Look at Joseph. Where do you think he came from? 183 00:10:26,860 --> 00:10:29,562 Nancy told me Dale had a Jamaican grandmother. 184 00:10:29,646 --> 00:10:30,956 I believed her. 185 00:10:31,798 --> 00:10:35,257 Oh, my God. Dale. Does Dale know? 186 00:10:35,368 --> 00:10:37,837 No, he's as slow as you. 187 00:10:38,304 --> 00:10:41,535 In a sweet, trusting sort of way. 188 00:10:42,942 --> 00:10:44,467 PEGGY: Shameless tramp. 189 00:10:44,577 --> 00:10:47,376 How can she? I just cannot believe. 190 00:10:47,680 --> 00:10:49,148 [GRUNTING] 191 00:10:49,282 --> 00:10:50,249 Ow. 192 00:10:53,119 --> 00:10:55,781 - You dirty bird. - What's wrong, sug'? 193 00:10:55,889 --> 00:10:58,881 Joseph is not Jamaican. And neither is Dale. 194 00:10:58,992 --> 00:11:02,485 And I am beginning to suspect that his grandmother isn't either. 195 00:11:02,896 --> 00:11:04,864 So you know. Who told you? 196 00:11:04,964 --> 00:11:07,524 No one had to tell me. How stupid do you think I am? 197 00:11:07,634 --> 00:11:10,763 You've been cheating for 12 years. Nancy, how could you? 198 00:11:10,870 --> 00:11:12,031 I have my reasons. 199 00:11:12,138 --> 00:11:15,904 Yes, and I've seen those reasons packed into his Sergio Valente jeans. 200 00:11:16,442 --> 00:11:18,934 I bet you don't even have headaches anymore. 201 00:11:22,109 --> 00:11:23,770 PEGGY: And you! 202 00:11:24,017 --> 00:11:25,535 Dale Gribble is your friend. 203 00:11:25,702 --> 00:11:27,749 How could you be a look-the-other-wayer? 204 00:11:27,854 --> 00:11:32,087 Now, Peggy, you're sort of freaked out because it's still fresh for you. 205 00:11:32,192 --> 00:11:35,423 Live with it awhile. You'll see, you'll get used to it. 206 00:11:35,528 --> 00:11:39,465 The only thing I ever want to get used to is a cold glass of lemonade. 207 00:11:43,203 --> 00:11:45,467 I am still a journalist, darn it. 208 00:11:46,573 --> 00:11:47,540 [SNIFFING] 209 00:11:47,740 --> 00:11:50,232 Did anyone else sniff today's garbage? 210 00:11:50,343 --> 00:11:53,313 And I thought yesterday's garbage smelled good. 211 00:12:00,153 --> 00:12:01,643 Morning, Dale. 212 00:12:01,754 --> 00:12:03,381 You poor man. 213 00:12:05,191 --> 00:12:07,421 - DALE: Hi, John Redcorn. - JOHN: Dale. 214 00:12:12,165 --> 00:12:13,257 Well, well, well. 215 00:12:13,800 --> 00:12:15,996 - PEGGY: John Redcorn. - JOHN: Peggy. 216 00:12:16,469 --> 00:12:18,961 Nancy's headache's very severe this morning. 217 00:12:19,439 --> 00:12:20,873 Must be the pollen. 218 00:12:20,974 --> 00:12:23,136 - Well, well, well. - Well. 219 00:12:23,243 --> 00:12:25,075 [OVER-PRONOUNCING] John Redcorn. 220 00:12:25,345 --> 00:12:27,109 [OVER-PRONOUNCING] Peggy Hill. 221 00:12:29,082 --> 00:12:32,382 MINH: Peggy Hill, what's so important I have to jump off treadmill? 222 00:12:32,485 --> 00:12:35,580 I am so sorry, Minh, but I had to talk to someone. 223 00:12:36,189 --> 00:12:37,588 It's about Nancy. 224 00:12:38,858 --> 00:12:41,293 - She's having an affair. - Oh, my God. 225 00:12:41,394 --> 00:12:44,489 - She's cheating on John Redcorn? - You know about them? 226 00:12:44,697 --> 00:12:47,064 Not at first. It took me about an hour. 227 00:12:47,166 --> 00:12:49,533 But I am naive and trusting person. 228 00:12:50,103 --> 00:12:53,038 - Peggy Hill, you not know? - I knew. 229 00:12:53,273 --> 00:12:56,868 Peggy Hill not know. That is so funny. Okay, who I tell? 230 00:12:56,976 --> 00:12:58,466 I e-mail Kahn. 231 00:12:59,579 --> 00:13:01,911 Why are we drinking beer in front of my house? 232 00:13:02,015 --> 00:13:04,279 We always drink beer in the back of my house. 233 00:13:04,384 --> 00:13:05,715 This feels wrong. 234 00:13:07,987 --> 00:13:09,182 But I like it. 235 00:13:09,422 --> 00:13:12,915 Dale will never find us here. And we need to talk alone. 236 00:13:13,359 --> 00:13:15,953 Does it bother anyone that we've known for years 237 00:13:16,062 --> 00:13:18,531 what's going on with Nancy, and Dale doesn't? 238 00:13:18,631 --> 00:13:21,726 [OVERACTING] Nancy's having an affair with John Redcorn? 239 00:13:21,834 --> 00:13:23,734 This is the first I've heard of it. 240 00:13:23,836 --> 00:13:28,364 I am shocked, I mean, I am shocked. That's what I mean, I am appalled. 241 00:13:28,474 --> 00:13:31,136 You don't want to be prying into them family secrets. 242 00:13:31,244 --> 00:13:33,906 You don't want get any old skeletons in no closet, man. 243 00:13:34,013 --> 00:13:36,311 Just like that little turd Orville Redenbacher, man. 244 00:13:36,416 --> 00:13:38,407 Turns out he was just a dang old actor, man. 245 00:13:38,518 --> 00:13:41,488 Look, can't we just discuss it for five seconds? 246 00:13:41,587 --> 00:13:44,852 I don't believe it. I've known Dale and Nancy for years, 247 00:13:44,957 --> 00:13:47,119 and they have a fairy-book marriage. 248 00:13:47,593 --> 00:13:49,027 Shut up, Bill. 249 00:13:51,264 --> 00:13:52,231 [DOORBELL RINGING] 250 00:13:54,334 --> 00:13:56,996 Why, Dale, how nice to see you. 251 00:13:57,337 --> 00:13:59,829 I can't find Hank, Bill, or Boomhauer. 252 00:14:00,006 --> 00:14:00,996 [CLEARS THROAT] 253 00:14:01,107 --> 00:14:05,408 If they're hiding behind the door, just nod slowly. 254 00:14:05,978 --> 00:14:07,673 You sweet man. 255 00:14:07,847 --> 00:14:10,179 You know, I have been thinking a lot about you. 256 00:14:10,283 --> 00:14:13,150 We never get to talk, you and I. Why is that? 257 00:14:14,587 --> 00:14:18,182 Anyway, Nancy should count herself lucky to have a man like you. 258 00:14:18,524 --> 00:14:23,189 Just look at you. The way that hat accents your head. 259 00:14:23,896 --> 00:14:27,161 Plenty of women would be happy to have you. Good women. 260 00:14:28,634 --> 00:14:30,625 Would you like to come in for some pie? 261 00:14:30,770 --> 00:14:31,737 [CLEARS THROAT] 262 00:14:31,971 --> 00:14:33,336 I should go. 263 00:14:33,740 --> 00:14:36,141 Hey, Dale. What's going on? 264 00:14:36,242 --> 00:14:40,372 Not much. Peggy Hill wants to leave Hank and run away with me. 265 00:14:40,513 --> 00:14:44,006 [OVERACTING] I don't believe it. They have a fairy-book marriage. 266 00:14:44,417 --> 00:14:47,614 "Let's face it. Angie Dickinson has lost her looks." 267 00:14:49,956 --> 00:14:54,325 "Mix pineapple juice with club soda, you've got yourself a big bucket of crap." 268 00:14:55,995 --> 00:14:58,987 Well, go ahead, say it. They're terrible. 269 00:14:59,399 --> 00:15:01,891 How can I appreciate the little things in life 270 00:15:02,001 --> 00:15:04,470 when so many big things are wrong and evil? 271 00:15:04,971 --> 00:15:06,803 Don't worry, Aunt Peggy. 272 00:15:07,039 --> 00:15:11,636 I'm sure that even Doyle Harcavy had trouble sometimes. 273 00:15:11,911 --> 00:15:15,575 Doyle Harcavy. If you ask me, Doyle Harcavy wasn't that good. 274 00:15:15,681 --> 00:15:16,648 [GASPS] 275 00:15:16,749 --> 00:15:20,549 Thank you, Mom. It's about time somebody said it. 276 00:15:20,686 --> 00:15:23,519 Of course coffee wakes you up in the morning. 277 00:15:23,623 --> 00:15:26,183 I mean, that's how they advertise it. 278 00:15:27,393 --> 00:15:28,758 HANK: You'll see. 279 00:15:28,861 --> 00:15:32,195 Being with the Gribbles when you know about Nancy is weird at first, 280 00:15:32,298 --> 00:15:34,323 but it goes away after a few years. 281 00:15:34,434 --> 00:15:36,835 It helps if you think of something else. 282 00:15:37,403 --> 00:15:39,872 I use sports. You can use Boggle. 283 00:15:40,139 --> 00:15:42,073 All right. You guys are just in time. 284 00:15:42,175 --> 00:15:45,338 Boomhauer's on second and Nancy's healer's at bat. 285 00:15:48,448 --> 00:15:52,146 Man, look at that John Redcorn. He sure can swing. 286 00:15:52,351 --> 00:15:53,318 [DALE HOOTING] 287 00:15:54,153 --> 00:15:55,780 [TENSE INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC] 288 00:15:58,057 --> 00:15:59,718 - Good eye. - Are you kidding? 289 00:15:59,826 --> 00:16:03,194 This guy never strikes out. Ain't that right, Nancy? 290 00:16:05,731 --> 00:16:07,597 Boggle. Think Boggle. 291 00:16:08,034 --> 00:16:10,025 All right, wingo, man. 292 00:16:11,170 --> 00:16:13,104 Redcorn's gonna score again. 293 00:16:13,506 --> 00:16:16,237 "Score." "Scores." "Core." "Cores." 294 00:16:16,375 --> 00:16:17,968 "Sore." "Sores." 295 00:16:18,077 --> 00:16:21,377 All right, come on, John. Come on. He's going all the way. 296 00:16:22,014 --> 00:16:23,880 I have to get out of here. 297 00:16:23,983 --> 00:16:25,610 Ball park nachos. 298 00:16:26,085 --> 00:16:28,816 You don't buy them. You only rent them. 299 00:16:29,055 --> 00:16:31,786 I'm done, Hank. My rose-colored glasses are off, 300 00:16:31,891 --> 00:16:34,690 and the world looks flesh-colored and unappealing. 301 00:16:34,794 --> 00:16:36,762 I cannot live the lie anymore. 302 00:16:36,863 --> 00:16:38,524 It takes two to talk about it, 303 00:16:38,631 --> 00:16:41,566 and everyone else already knows and isn't interested. 304 00:16:42,435 --> 00:16:44,096 No, not everybody knows, Hank. 305 00:16:44,203 --> 00:16:48,299 I can think of one person who doesn't. The one person who really should. 306 00:16:49,008 --> 00:16:50,169 [DALE CHEERING] 307 00:16:50,276 --> 00:16:54,179 All right. Way to go, Big Bad John. 308 00:16:58,384 --> 00:16:59,681 Hold up, Peggy. 309 00:16:59,785 --> 00:17:03,722 You can't just walk back over there and tell Dale his wife's cheating on him. 310 00:17:03,823 --> 00:17:05,985 Just let sleeping dogs lie. 311 00:17:06,092 --> 00:17:09,551 Interesting choice of words, Mr. Hill. "Lie!" 312 00:17:09,662 --> 00:17:11,323 I meant lie down. 313 00:17:11,430 --> 00:17:15,424 I know that, Hank. Dogs don't tell lies. Only people lie. 314 00:17:15,935 --> 00:17:17,767 They lie like dogs. 315 00:17:23,509 --> 00:17:25,375 [SANDER WHIRRING] 316 00:17:27,179 --> 00:17:30,843 Hank, there's something I just figured out and you need to know. 317 00:17:31,517 --> 00:17:33,349 Sorry, I can't hear you. 318 00:17:33,452 --> 00:17:36,251 Probably none of my business anyway. Sander. 319 00:17:39,225 --> 00:17:40,192 [GRUNTING] 320 00:17:42,128 --> 00:17:44,119 Hank, it's important. 321 00:17:47,133 --> 00:17:50,569 Your wife loves me and wants us to run off together. 322 00:17:50,703 --> 00:17:53,172 I've not yet been able to ascertain where. 323 00:17:53,272 --> 00:17:56,333 - Dale-- - No problemo on this end. 324 00:17:56,426 --> 00:17:58,520 I don't even find her attractive. 325 00:17:58,644 --> 00:18:01,006 Of course you do, and I appreciate the lie. 326 00:18:01,130 --> 00:18:03,172 But Peggy's just being nice to you. 327 00:18:03,282 --> 00:18:06,081 But you're a good friend for wanting to tell me. 328 00:18:07,987 --> 00:18:11,116 If the shoe were on the other foot, would you want to know? 329 00:18:11,223 --> 00:18:12,952 Don't flatter yourself, Hank. 330 00:18:13,059 --> 00:18:15,994 Nancy likes her men thin and pale of face. 331 00:18:16,228 --> 00:18:18,663 I thank God every day for sending me an angel 332 00:18:18,764 --> 00:18:21,756 with the hots for my track team physique. 333 00:18:29,875 --> 00:18:32,367 PEGGY: "You hear the expression, 'Lie like a dog,' 334 00:18:32,478 --> 00:18:34,810 often enough that it is almost a clich�. 335 00:18:35,147 --> 00:18:36,842 But more often than not, 336 00:18:36,949 --> 00:18:39,611 if someone is lying to you, they are a person. 337 00:18:39,785 --> 00:18:42,914 We all know a certain person who is lying to her husband. 338 00:18:43,022 --> 00:18:46,617 Every time we look the other way, we add a lie to a lie. 339 00:18:47,059 --> 00:18:49,858 Well, this reporter is not gonna lie anymore. 340 00:18:50,796 --> 00:18:52,491 And you can print that." 341 00:19:00,473 --> 00:19:02,407 - Excuse me. - Sug', listen. 342 00:19:02,508 --> 00:19:05,375 I love Dale, but in a lights-on sort of way. 343 00:19:05,511 --> 00:19:07,377 I feel for you, I really do. 344 00:19:07,480 --> 00:19:11,144 But you married for better or worse, and worse includes Dale. 345 00:19:11,484 --> 00:19:14,784 - Now, either you tell him or I will. - Peggy, please. 346 00:19:15,121 --> 00:19:17,920 - I'm not going to-- - Well, then get out of my way. 347 00:19:19,058 --> 00:19:20,958 [TENSE INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC] 348 00:19:28,367 --> 00:19:29,334 [SIGHING] 349 00:19:30,102 --> 00:19:31,160 Hey, Dale. 350 00:19:31,437 --> 00:19:34,634 I thought I'd like to take a little of my own advice this morning. 351 00:19:34,740 --> 00:19:38,176 - Having some waffles, are you? - No, I meant the longer one. 352 00:19:38,277 --> 00:19:39,745 About sleeping dogs. 353 00:19:40,346 --> 00:19:43,475 Dale, I have to tell you something very important. 354 00:19:45,584 --> 00:19:46,813 HANK: Oh, no. 355 00:19:47,019 --> 00:19:47,986 Dale... 356 00:19:48,587 --> 00:19:51,488 Nancy is not the wife you think she is. 357 00:19:51,590 --> 00:19:53,354 And John Redcorn, 358 00:19:53,459 --> 00:19:55,928 he is not the friend that you think he is. 359 00:19:56,028 --> 00:19:58,360 Wait a minute. Let me get this straight. 360 00:19:58,497 --> 00:20:02,866 Nancy and John Redcorn did something to your dog? 361 00:20:02,968 --> 00:20:05,369 No, damn it, Dale. Nancy and John Redcorn are-- 362 00:20:05,471 --> 00:20:08,702 - Hey, Dad! - Just a sec, Peggy. Yes, son? 363 00:20:09,175 --> 00:20:12,611 Me and Bobby are bored. What do we do? 364 00:20:12,812 --> 00:20:14,610 How about renting a videotape? 365 00:20:14,714 --> 00:20:18,082 Yeah, we want to see Encino Man, but we don't have any money. 366 00:20:18,250 --> 00:20:22,209 Pauly Shore, 1992 classic. 367 00:20:23,389 --> 00:20:27,348 I got two fives, one for you, one for me. 368 00:20:27,660 --> 00:20:28,957 Thanks, Dad. 369 00:20:30,029 --> 00:20:32,396 Wait. I found some more. 370 00:20:33,866 --> 00:20:36,494 Can't watch Encino Man without milk balls, huh? 371 00:20:37,203 --> 00:20:38,637 Thanks, Dad! 372 00:20:42,475 --> 00:20:44,307 Sorry about that, Peggy. 373 00:20:45,044 --> 00:20:47,138 Now, what is it that I don't know? 374 00:20:47,346 --> 00:20:48,313 Dale... 375 00:20:49,715 --> 00:20:51,479 I just found out... 376 00:20:52,451 --> 00:20:55,580 that Vikings were the first visitors to the moon. 377 00:20:56,088 --> 00:20:57,283 I knew that. 378 00:20:57,389 --> 00:21:00,324 Why do you think we named our spacecraft after them? 379 00:21:00,860 --> 00:21:04,194 - Poor naive Peggy. - That makes sense. 380 00:21:04,897 --> 00:21:07,298 I'm so glad you and I could have this little talk. 381 00:21:07,399 --> 00:21:08,958 I feel so much better. 382 00:21:09,535 --> 00:21:11,230 Okay, I guess. 383 00:21:13,806 --> 00:21:15,069 Peggy? 384 00:21:15,975 --> 00:21:17,670 You got a good husband there. 385 00:21:17,777 --> 00:21:20,303 He doesn't have the best body on the alley, 386 00:21:20,713 --> 00:21:23,182 but he's got a good head on his shoulders. 387 00:21:24,016 --> 00:21:25,347 Yeah, I know. 388 00:21:31,791 --> 00:21:33,782 Well, how'd he take it? 389 00:21:35,094 --> 00:21:36,960 I couldn't tell him. 390 00:21:37,062 --> 00:21:39,793 I guess some things are best left unsaid. 391 00:21:39,999 --> 00:21:40,966 Yep. 392 00:21:41,333 --> 00:21:43,301 - You know, Hank, I really-- - I know. 393 00:21:43,402 --> 00:21:44,426 - And, Peggy-- - I got you. 394 00:21:44,537 --> 00:21:46,027 All right, then. 395 00:21:46,672 --> 00:21:48,436 Great, pepperoni it is. 396 00:21:58,317 --> 00:21:59,751 [THEME SONG] 397 00:22:28,514 --> 00:22:30,346 JOHN [OVER-PRONOUNCING]: Peggy Hill. 398 00:22:30,396 --> 00:22:34,946 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 30525

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