All language subtitles for Doctor.Who.Tales.of.the.TARDIS.S01E02.The.Mind.Robber.1080p.iP.WEB-DL.AAC2.0.H.264-playWEB_Subtitles01.ENG

DOCTOR WHO THEME

Where the devil am I?

I think it's a TARDIS.

Oh, I think it's THE TARDIS!

In a manner of speaking.

Zoe?

Hello, Jamie!

Zoe!

Oh! Oh, Jamie, Jamie!

You remember! Of course I remember.

Mind you, I forgot for so long.

Well, they made us forget,

the Time Lords,

when we left the Doctor.

They erased our memories.

But in here, it's all back.

Every adventure, every story,

every single moment!

Aye, but how did we get here?

And where's the Doctor?

Oh, he'll be out there somewhere

in the stars.

But I don't think this is for him.

I think this is meant for us.

Oh.

I've missed him every day of my life.

But I didn't realise it.

What they did to us was unforgivable.

And I think we've been
brought here to undo it.

One last gift from the Doctor.

I'd still be with him now if I could.

Try to keep up with him.

Oh, don't you have a family? Aye.

Five daughters. Oh!

Legs hairier than mine and 19 grandchildren.

19?! Aye, not so wee any more.

Well, I have a son.

A scientist.

I named him James.

A...after me?

I never realised before, but...

Well, of course after you! Oh.

Did you marry a man from the space Wheel?

No, no. We met on Earth in Australia.

Ha! I've been there.

Got shot at.

Oh, we got shot at all the time. Aye.

But look at you.

Ever so noble.

Oh, presidential robes, thank you very much.

This is my third inauguration.

President? Mm-hm.

The Doctor would be so proud.

Isn't it funny,

all the things he showed us,

and taught us,

I've been using them every
single day of my life

without realising?

All those experiences

were at the back of my mind,

pushing me forwards.

Me too.

Do you think we'll ever
see the Doctor again?

Oh, I'm not sure.

But we keep him alive
by telling our stories.

WHOOSHING

Oh. So, we tell our stories to each other

and to our families.

Yes. Pass them down,
generation after generation.

Ah, well, where do we begin?

And don't say Cybermen.

I want to forget about the Cybermen.

SHE CHUCKLES OK.

Er... The Krotons.

No! The Quarks.

The Quarks, aye.

The wee metal beasties.

And didn't the TARDIS get swallowed by lava?

Yes!

And then things got worse.

That's right.

I remember now.

Oh, my word! Come on, Jamie.
Into the TARDIS. Quickly.

Isn't it beautiful? Eh?

The volcanic eruption.
It's beautiful. Beautiful?

A great river of molten lava rolling down...

Quiet. Oh. Oh, dear.

Is something wrong?
This sort of thing has happened before.

The fluid links don't seem
to be able to take the load.

Oh, oh! Mercury vapour.

Well, we can't stay here.
We'll be buried by that lava.

It's nearly on us, look!

Oh, my word! What a wonderful sight.

Fantastic.

Listen, will you two stop gaping
at that and get us out of here.

Don't worry, Jamie.
We're safe in the TARDIS.

Are you sure? Well...

Has the TARDIS ever been buried
up to its neck in lava before?

Well, no. How can you be so sure
we're going to be all right?

Well, perhaps the fluid links
have cooled down by now.

That's a bit more power.
Zoe, can you read off

what that meter is registering, please?

Reading 987.3... Yes.

.4, .5... Oh, no.

6...

It's jumped to 991.
It's going up by numerals. Oh, no!

If I can't pull this down, we'll get stuck.

That stupid, idiotic...

Doctor, the lava's up to the TARDIS.

It's reached the 1,000 danger mark, Doctor.

If only I could unstick this stupid,
idiotic...

There we are. Have you done it?
Are we on our way?

It's stopped the fluid links from vaporising.
We shan't suffocate.

If you don't hurry up
and get us out of here,

we'll be fried by that lava!

Isn't there any way we can get away?

Well, there is an emergency unit, but...

Oh, no, I can't possibly use that.

But this is an emergency.

But it moves the TARDIS out
of the time-space dimension,

out of reality. Fine.
Reality's getting too hot, anyway.

Oh, all right.

Here we are.

Now, then, which end was...?

Yes...

No, look, I can't possibly use this.

We don't know what will happen.

Will you stop your jabbering
and get on with it. Look!

METALLIC THRUMMING

SONIC PULSES

Ah. There you are.

We're all right.
What was all the panic about?

Is there any reading on the meter, Zoe?

Yes, it's...

Well, that's funny.
There's no reading at all.

No. None of the meters are registering.

Not one.

But we're safe. We're out of that
lava stuff and we're all right here.

Yes, possibly.

I'd better get working on the
TARDIS controls right away.

Doctor, we're not actually in flight,
are we?

No. Why?

Well, then, presumably, we've landed,

so why isn't the scanner showing anything?

Well, because...

Well, we're nowhere.

It's as simple as that.

I'll be in the power room, Jamie.

Right.

Hey! What does he mean, we're nowhere?

I don't know.

I suppose he means that outside
the TARDIS now is nothing.

Just nothing.

Well, I'm away to change,
and I suggest you do the same.

You look like a wee McLarty. A what?

A ragamuffin. A... Oh, never mind.

Doctor? What's happened?

Nothing. It's all exactly the same.
Good, good.

You're worried by something,
Doctor, what is it?

Me, worried? No.

It's only the unknown that worries me, Zoe.

But if there's nothing outside
the TARDIS and we're nowhere,

then what is there to worry about?
I don't know.

The emergency unit is limited to
a certain time, simply because...

Because it's dangerous to stay
where we are for any longer, yes.

But we must be safe at the moment,

otherwise the unit wouldn't let us stay here,
would it?

You're interested in what's
outside the TARDIS now, aren't you?

Well, curious, yes. Zoe, listen to me.

If we move outside the TARDIS,

we step into a dimension
about which we know nothing.

We shall be at the mercy

of the forces,
outside time and space as we know it.

But, Doctor,
I still think we should go out and see...

Zoe, we must stay in the TARDIS.

BAGPIPE MUSIC

He's still got his head stuck in that...

Zoe, do you see that?
Do you see where we are? What?

Look, on the scanner. It's my home.
It's Scotland. Scotland? Aye.

Oh! It was there.

Oh, yeah. Now, look, I'm not seeing things.

It was there, I tell you. Really?

Aye. The mist must have covered it over.

You get a lot of mist in the Highlands.

So you think we've landed, then?

Yes. I couldn't have seen anything, could I?

Oh, just a minute. What?

There's a wee gadget on here
somewhere that warns you

to go elsewhere if there's any danger.

No, no. It's definitely switched off.
We've landed.

Well,
I think it's more likely that you saw...

It can't be, Jamie.
Aye, it's switched off, all right.

It's the city.

My home.

Jamie, you did see something,
but it wasn't Scotland.

Of course it was.
Look, I know Scotland when I see it.

And I know my home city.

Anyway, there's your proof.

Uh-huh.

But I don't understand. It was there.

Yeah, I know, Scotland! No.
It was quite plainly...

Anyway, we've both seen something,

so that proves we've landed, doesn't it?

Yes. Let's go out and see.

Now, not without the Doctor.

Oh, all right. Aye.

It is! Jamie, Doctor, it is my home.

Oh, come on.

Now, which one...?

Oh, come on.

No, we definitely saw something.

But, Jamie, it's not poss...

You say you both saw different things?

No, it was definitely Scotland.

Zoe thought she saw something else -
her home city or something,

but, no, it was very misty and
she couldn't have seen right.

So you both saw your homes?

No, Doctor. I'm saying that...

Zoe? Oh, my word!

Zoe, Zoe!

I told her to wait. I'll go and get her.

No, Jamie. Don't you see?

Those pictures that you and Zoe
saw on the scanner were put there.

Obviously put there to
tempt you to go outside.

Who by? I don't know.

But there's someone or something out there

that wants us to go out of the TARDIS.

You mean, some kind of danger? I don't know.

BEEPING Oh. Oh, no.

That's the first warning.
There isn't much more time.

But, Zoe, we can't leave her out there.
I'll go and find her.

No, Jamie. No.

Jamie! Jamie!

LOUDER ALARM SOUNDS

Oh! Oh, no.

WHOOSHING

Who are you?

Who are you?

Where are you?

What do you want with me?

No...

No, I must fight.

I must fight.

I will fight.

Jamie! Doctor, where are you?

Zoe!

Zoe.

Jamie. I thought I was lost for good. Aye.

It's funny out here, isn't it?

It's not the mist that we thought it was.
It's...

Opaque. Nothingness.
Just like the Doctor said.

It doesn't feel right, though.
Come on, back to the TARDIS.

Is that the right way?
Of course it's the right way.

Oh! No, it could be...

Oh! We're lost, aren't we?
No, I wouldn't say that.

We're just...

Well, the...

We're just a...

Do you want to know something? What?

I think we're lost. This isn't a joke,
Jamie.

No, you're right.

The Doctor was saying that those
images we saw on our scanner...

..were put here to tempt us out.

Well, if somebody was trying to
tempt us away, where are they?

And who are they?

Aye. Aye, well, let's not be in too
much of a hurry to find that out.

What are we going to do?
The TARDIS can't be that far away.

No, if we stand here and shout
for the Doctor, when he hears us,

he can guide us back.

Doctor!

Doctor, can you hear us?

Doctor. Doctor.

Answer if you can hear us. No, I will fight.

I will fight.

Oh, Jamie, this is hopeless.
We could be going round in circles.

Aye.

You know, I've got a funny
feeling that we're being watched.

Do you not feel it too?

Yes.

Can you see anyone? No. No-one at all.

Jamie, look.

What is it?

It's very faint,
but I think it's my home again.

Zoe, it's a trick. You know it is.

Oh, Jamie, it's gone.

That proves it, doesn't it?

A city like that doesn't just disappear,
does it?

But it is out there.
It's not, Zoe. You know it isn't.

No, I know.

For a moment, I thought it was real.

It was almost as though I was
seeing what I most wanted to see.

Jamie, you're right. We've got to get away.

Jamie?

BAGPIPE MUSIC

Jamie, it's not real.

I know, but it's there. No, Jamie, it's not.

I must... No, Jamie, no.

Oh! Why did you do...? BAGPIPES STOP

Oh, the Doctor's right.

There is something or someone
trying to tempt us away. Aye.

What are they? I don't know,

but they don't look very friendly.

Oh!

ZOE SCREAMS

Jamie, Zoe, don't go.

Don't go.

Follow them. Follow and save them.

Who are you? What do you want?

Follow them.

No. I won't. I won't give in.

You will. You will. You will.

ZOE SCREAMS

There is still time. Save them.

Save them.

I can't let it happen.

I can't.

Jamie?

Zoe?

Jamie, Zoe, concentrate only on my words.

Think of me. Think of the TARDIS.

They are the only real things here.

Everything else is unreality.

It is only in your minds. Now, concentrate.

Come to me now. Now.

Walk straight to the TARDIS. Don't stop.

Come on. Keep walking to the TARDIS.

Come on.

Don't look behind you.

Now go in. Go in.

Jamie. Zoe.

Go in before it's too late.

Go in.

Go in.

Doctor, what's been happening?
Sh, Jamie. Quiet.

Oh, how do you feel?

What happened? Where have we been?

Nowhere. But...

All mental images, Jamie. Pure imagination.

Why? What's all this about? I don't know.

We've got to be careful.
We've got to be very, very careful now.

Careful? We're safe enough
back in the TARDIS, aren't we?

Yes, possibly. WHINING NOISE

What's that?

I don't know.
It's not the TARDIS going wrong again?

No, no. We're on our way, all right,

but the trouble is I don't know where to.

That's not unusual.
Tell me when we get there.

I'm sorry, Doctor. It was my fault.
I shouldn't have gone outside.

It's all right, Zoe.
I don't think you could help it. Why not?

I think whoever it was that
was tempting you outside

made it irresistible.

Why! Even I gave in when the voice said...

What voice?

I don't know.

Perhaps there wasn't one.
Perhaps it was just illusion.

But we are safe now? Oh, yes, yes, yes.

The TARDIS is performing quite normally.
That's odd.

What?
Well, this meter's dropped below 1,000.

Is that critical?

It means we're using more
power than we're storing.

But don't worry.
We've got an emergency power booster unit

somewhere, if I can find the switch.

No. Oh, dear.

It's here somewhere.

STRANGE SONIC NEIGHING

Ah! Found it? Yes. Yes, that's the one.

Now, just a little bit more power.

Read off the meter for me, will you, Zoe?

Reading 990... Yes.

1... Good. 2... Fine.

3... Agh!

Quiet, Jamie.

What's been happening? 4...

Yeah. Steady at 4.

Oh, no. Is something wrong?

5. Good. 6... Fine.

7, 8... Let it creep up now.

I don't want to blow the fluid links again.

Just had the most peculiar dream.

There was this big white horse with a horn

right in the middle of his head...

A unicorn? Aye. Probably.

He was charging straight towards me.

9... 8... Head down, ready for the kill.
I thought any moment!

Really, Jamie, your imagination is...

What's the matter?

I don't... Jamie, look.

Doctor? Mm. What's up?

Quiet, Jamie. Quiet.

VIBRATING THROB

That sound.

That vibration. It's alien.

I can feel it too. In my head.

I can't seem to be able to concentrate.

Concentrate, both of you.
Concentrate on something.

I can't! What is it?
Read out the figures to me, Zoe, aloud.

9, 9, 1...

Louder. Both of you, read them off.

2, 3... It's getting stronger. It's...

3. 4... It's dragging me.

Concentrate. Both of you.

5... It's too strong.

It's too powerful. 6...

7... It's too powerful.

I must fight... I must fight...

I will fight!

Jamie, the Doctor.

SHE SCREAMS

Doctor?

Zoe.

What's happened?

Jamie! Jamie, over here!

Zoe? Is that you?

Redcoats. Am I back in my own time?

If I am, they'll shoot me down.

Shoot me down like a dog, would you?

Well,
a McCrimmon never died without a fight yet.

Creag an tuire!

Jamie? Jamie!

Jamie, I'm here.

Where are you?

Jamie, can you hear me?

Jamie...

Jamie, Doctor, help.
Somebody help me. I'm trapped.

DOOR CREAKS LOUDLY

SHE SCREAMS

Good. Good. Excellent.

And now the good Doctor, where is he?

Look around. He must be here somewhere.

Find him. Search.

I see. He has eluded us for the moment.

So he is not yet completely
under my control.

Perhaps it is better this way. Yes.

He'll soon find out.

Find him. Search all areas!

Jamie, Zoe... Jamie...

Fight... I must fight.

I must fight, fight!

Where in time and space am I?

Where are the others?

Jamie? Zoe?

Doctor. Hello! Jamie, is that you?

Jamie! Doctor!

Zoe?

Doctor, I'm trapped! Help me, please!

All right, Zoe. Stay where you are
and I'll see if I can find you.

Hello?

Call out to me.

Here! Over here! Yes, all right, Jamie.

Hello, Doctor! I'm over here.
All right, Zoe.

OVERLAPPING SHOUTS

No, no, no!

Not both together. One at a time.

Now, then, Jamie, you seem to be the nearer.

You first. Count up to ten.

One, two, three, four...

Find him. Search. Search!

Perhaps some light will help.

This is like exploring a maze in the dark.

Well, thank you, whoever you are.

HEAVY MARCHING

Spread out. Cover the whole area, slowly.

Keep moving. Look left to right.

Search every inch of the forest.

We know the Doctor is here somewhere.

Hm. No sign of him,
but he can't be far away.

We'll continue on this course.

Track him down! Those are your orders!
He must be found!

Jamie. Zoe.

Heckinah degul.

Tolgo fonac.

Langro dehul san?

Grildig? Splacknuck?

Yes, er... Parlez-vous francais?

Recalsitrat undique tutis! Glandack daytan!

Do you speak English, by any chance?

Sir, my birth was of honest parents
in an island called England.

Good gracious me.
Why didn't you say so at once?

I've spoken as many languages as
I have the least smattering of.

High and Low Dutch. Latin.

Well, let's start at the beginning again,
shall we?

What did you say to me?

I said, "Beware, false traitor, highwayman,

"robber, pickpocket, murderer."

You must be making some mistake.
Highwayman, indeed.

When were you last in England?

We set sail from Bristol on May 4th 1699.

We? What became of my companions
I cannot tell. They were all lost.

My dear sir, you and I are in the same boat.

You have a stout ship? Unfortunately, no.

Would you take that pop gun away?
It does unsettle me so.

Well, sir,
if you can assure me you are no traitor.

How can I be a traitor when
I don't even know where I am?

Where am I?

I cannot tell.

That makes two of us, doesn't it?

Oh, thank you. Oh, thank you.

Listen, I've lost my companions, too.

Two of them, a boy and a girl.
Jamie and Zoe.

Have you seen them? Alas, no.

I've got to find them.

Perhaps you could help me
if you know your way around.

It is not permitted. Who says so?

The Master. The Master?

He has articles of impeachment against you

for treason and other capital crimes.

Treason again? Really?

I leave to your prudence
what measures you will take,

and now, sir, to avoid suspicion...

..I must retire in as
private a manner as I came.

But, sir, don't go. I wanted to ask you...

A hallucination?

Ah, well.

Jamie!

Zoe!

Cooee. Is that you, Zoe?

Cooee. Who's that? Who are you?

Well... Well, well, well, well, well!

How do you do?

Why did the chicken cross the road?
This isn't the time for riddles.

You must answer.
Why did the chicken cross the road?

Very well. To get to the other side.

Or so I've always been led to believe.
Now would you mind telling me...

Which is it, the yolk of an egg is
white or the yolk of an egg are white?

Neither. It's yellow. How many beans make
five? Where was Moses when the lights went out?

Adam and Eve and Pinch Me
went to the river to bathe.

Adam and Eve got drowned.
Who do you think was saved?

Well, Pinch Me, obviously.

THEY GIGGLE Stop it. Don't do that.

Now it's my turn to ask you questions.

What can you make of a sword? Huh?

What can you make of it?

Rearrange it. Think.
This is your last chance.

S-W-O-R-D. Rearrange.

S-W-O-R-D...

Rearranged it makes...W-O-R-D-S. Words.

THEY CHEER

It's a dictionary. Words.

You have answered correctly.

You may be suitable. Suitable?

I do hope so. Come on. It's teatime.

I'm hungry. Race you home.

Words...

Doctor, over here. Jamie?

Jamie? Is that you?

Ah! Jamie.

It's just another trick.

Hello...

What's this?

A safe?

Locked, of course.

And a wishing well.

I wish...

I wish I believed in wishing wells.

MUTTERING FROM WELL

Ha! Ha! Ha!

Hello.

This is a puzzle. That's what it is.

Oh, yes.

I'm beginning to recognise this.
It's sort of picture writing.

Let me see now.

Jamie.

Mist.

Mist without the M or the T. I-S. Is.

Hand without the H. And.

So we have "Jamie...is...

"safe... and...well."

Oh! Oh, now I've lost his face!

Hello.

Oh, I see.

I'm supposed to provide the face, am I?
Mm-hm.

Very well. Now, then.

Yes. There we are.

Yes, that's his nose all right.

And...

Here. Yes...

Oh, no. I've done it wrong.

Doctor.

Oh, I'm glad to see you again!

But you're not Jamie. Eh?

MASTER CHUCKLES What are you on about?

Well, your face, it's different.

What do you mean, different?
Look in the mirror.

That's not my face!
It's the one you're stuck with for now.

Why should I suddenly be different?
I don't know.

It's a nasty trick played by
the person who brought us here.

Brought us here? What's happening?

I don't know.
Just a minute, if you really are Jamie,

you should know what's happened.
How did you get here?

Well, you know,
I was describing my dream with a unicorn.

Yes. He was charging straight for me,

head down, ready for the kill,

when suddenly everything
went crazy and I was off.

Off? Where to?

Where have you been?!

In the fog. Really.
Ever since the TARDIS broke up.

It did what? Broke up. It fell to bits.

The next thing I knew, I was here.

I heard you calling, but couldn't find you.

Jamie, help!

Zoe, where are you?
I'm trapped. You must help me!

It sounds as if she's over there.

Come on, then!

Zoe! I can't get out. Help me, please.

There's no handle. There's no lock either.

Don't you see? It's not a door at all.

It's a brick wall with a door painted on it.

That's crazy.
How do you open a door that isn't a door?

Let me think.

What's the good of thinking?
What we want is a battering ram.

When is a door not a door?

Och, this is no time for riddles.

No, no. When is a door not a door, hmm?

When it's ajar. Eh?

Get me out.

Get me out! Oh, get me out!

Oh, Zoe. THEY LAUGH

Get me out.

Not unless you promise to be a good girl.

Oh, you...

Go on. Get her out.

Come on, then. Up you come.

One, two, three...

I thought I was never going to get out of...
Who are you?

Don't you start, Zoe.

I've had enough from the Doctor. I'm me.

Jamie.

Why does he look so different?
Well, I'll...I'll tell you later.

It's time we got out of this wood.

Aye. This place gives me the creeps.

You go on ahead, Jamie.

Is that really Jamie? Well...well, yes.

He couldn't just have changed like that.
It's impossible.

I think we may be in a place where
nothing is impossible. Come on.

Oh, my feet ache.
I'm going to sit down and have a rest.

If only we could see over these trees.

If you give me a leg-up, I'll shin up one.

Yes. Good idea.

Up you go.

Can you manage? I think so.

It's a bit tricky, but...

Nearly there. There's a foothold.

I'm at the top.

Doctor... What is it? Can you see something?

I can see all right.

Do you know what this tree is? No. What?

It's a letter S.

The next one's an L,
and then an O and a W...

It's a forest of words.

This must be a world of words.
What do the words say?

"Slow but sure..."

"..in for a penny..." In for a pound.

They're all sayings, proverbs.

"Look before you leap."

I can't read any more. Never mind that.
Can you see a way out?

I think so...

Yes. Yes.

Down you come. There's a foothold.
Can you manage?

Steady.

There.

It's this way.

Oh, Doctor. It's all right, don't worry.

I've met this gentleman before.
He's a traveller like ourselves.

Delighted to meet you again, sir.

Allow me to present my two companions.

This is Zoe...

..and this is Jamie.

How do you do, sir?
We're trying to get out of this wood.

This resolution may appear
very bold and dangerous.

But we've got to get away.
Haven't you ever tried to escape?

No. I looked upon myself to
be fully settled for life.

These tests, what's the point of them?

In choosing persons for all employments,

they have regard to great abilities.

A course of study is required to qualify

any man for the service of his country.

But who's in charge here?

Who's setting all these tests for us?
The Master.

The Master again.

I suppose this army of robots
works for the Master as well.

Army? As to their military affairs,
I knew not what they meant.

Surely you've seen them.
I knew not what they meant.

Ah, now, but surely? RHYTHMIC MARCHING

That's the sound they make.
They're coming back.

What do we do? We hide! In among the trees.

There's a J. There's room for two.
Thank goodness there's a letter C.

You, sir! Aren't you going to take cover?

The best expedient I could
think on was to keep guard.

Whatever you do, don't give us away.

I could not forbear smiling, sir.

What you told me is mistaken.
There was no army here.

At last. Very well.

Round them up and lead them away.

You have your orders! You know what to do!

Thank you very much.
Why did you give us away?

But I said there was no army here.
MARCHING CONTINUES

Jamie, Zoe, don't you see?
As far as he's concerned,

they don't exist. He can't see them.

Now, sir,
I must forbear to trouble you further.

Having answered the only objection
you've raised against me,

I now take leave of you all. Sir.

Wait a bit.

I think the soldiers want us
to go in the other direction.

Doctor, these soldiers...

Am I mad, or do they look like toy soldiers?

Yes. Particularly dangerous toys, too.
Come along. Let's go.

MARCHING STOPS They've stopped.

Why have they brought us here?
We shall soon find out.

Mission is accomplished.

It's so dark.

I've got a funny sort of a
feeling I've been here before.

Sh! RUMBLING

Listen.

Sounds like a horse galloping.
It's getting nearer.

It's coming this way.

WHINNYING It's not a horse. Look!

A unicorn. My dream!
It's looking at us. Keep quite still.

It's coming straight for us. Run!
No! We don't stand a chance.

Stand still.

Hold your ground! Doctor!
Come on! This is my dream!

No! Stand still.

But we haven't got a chance!

Don't you see? It's my dream all over again!

It's real! No, it's not real. It's a legend.

You mustn't believe in it. You mustn't!

Say it doesn't exist. Say it!

It doesn't exist!

What... What happened?

Another test.

But it was alive. We all saw it.
It was terrifying.

He challenged us to believe in it.
Who? The Master?

Whoever it is who's setting
up all these conjuring tricks.

But I don't understand.

The unicorn appeared to be
real until you said it wasn't.

Then we were safe.
But WE believed in it, Jamie and I.

Yes, that was just the danger.
Your belief was affecting ME.

Who would think up a crazy notion like this?

I don't know.

A fantastic mind.

Too kind.

And if I may,
I'd like to return the compliment.

He's obviously supremely intelligent.

He's learning the rules
here with admirable speed.

Yes,
we were right to choose the good Doctor.

Doctor. The soldiers!

RHYTHMIC CREAKING

Stop. Let them go.

Wherever they run, whatever they do,

every step they take will
only bring them nearer.

The trap is set.

Let them walk into it.

Oh, how much further?

There's no sign of the toy soldiers now.

We've got to get out of this place. Look.

There's a house.

You again. I'll sort you this time!

Creag an tuire!

SHOT

Jamie!

Doctor! Now, it's all right, Zoe, hmm?

FAINT THUDDING

Well, come on, come on.

If you want to play games,
let's get on with it.

ECHOING CHUCKLES

What's that?
Well, I have to make up his face again.

You did this before. Yes.

And that's how Jamie's face got changed.

You got it all wrong! What? No. No, no.

Well, I-I-I was rushed.

Now, then... There we are.

All right, I know. Uh... There we are.

One...

Now, then... Oh, yes, that's his nose.

You can't mistake his nose, can you?

And...

DOCTOR CHUCKLES

Ah. There you are, you see.

Jamie! Jamie! Thank goodness you're back.

Back? What do you mean, back?
I haven't been anywhere.

You've got your face back.

I have? Yes. Look.

You're right, I have. That's much better.

Ah, the house. Yes. Come along.
Let's... Let's go inside.

DOOR CREAKS

DOOR SLAMS SHUT

Well, there must be somebody here.
These candles are alight.

Eurgh! Hello there!

ECHOING

One, two, three, four tunnels leading off.

It'd be easy to get lost in there.
Just a moment.

What's he found?

Yes, a ball of twine.

Hmm. Oh, yes,
this must have been an invitation.

Why? It's the classical way
of getting through a maze.

Jamie, tie that to the door, will you?

Hey, it's locked.

Then we ARE meant to go on.
Yes, I think we are.

But that means that wherever we go,
at any time, they know.

Yes. They're expecting us. Hmm.

Don't break the thread. Come along.

BEEPING Ah, at last!

The Doctor is commendably prompt.

I wonder how long it will
take him to get to the heart

of the mystery.

Which way, do you think? To the right.

They both look equally unattractive to me.

It must be to the right.

I've been working it out as we went along.

Doctor. Shush. How?

As soon as we avoided the dead ends,
it soon fell into a clear pattern.

One left, two right, three left,
four right and so on.

It's a simple arithmetical progression.

Yes, but, Doctor... Shh, Jamie.

What it is to have an arithmetical brain, eh?
What do you want?

The thread's run out.
Now, should we not go back?

No. You stay here,
and Zoe and I will explore a little further.

There must be another way out of this maze.
I need to find it.

See, they don't want us to find a way out,
only a way in!

WATER DRIPPING

HE WHISTLES

BEEPING Go on. Go on!

You're almost there!

I was right. This isn't the way out.

We're in the middle of the maze.

Oh, Doctor, I don't like it.
Let's go. Just a moment.

I was rather expecting a welcoming committee,
but perhaps I was wrong.

Well, I hope you were.

Ah, yes, but there has been someone here,
not so long ago either. Look!

Oh! Oh...

And there's some tracks of an animal too.

Oh, Doctor, let's go.

CREATURE ROARS

It couldn't be. What?

Well, I know it's silly, but do you
remember the story of the Minotaur?

Half-man, half-bull, yes.

And he lived in the heart of a labyrinth.

And there were human sacrifices.

Exactly,
but I-I don't think we need be too alarmed.

After all... CREATURE ROARS

As I was saying,
as long as we're quite certain

that the Minotaur is only a... Doctor, look!

ROARING

Doctor?

Are you all right? What's happening?

DISTANT ROARS

RHYTHMIC CREAKING

Oh, so that's how you can see, is it?

With that wee lighthouse of yours.

No! Brainless idiot!

Get yourself free. Don't let the boy escape.

Forward. Forward.

Doctor, it's moving.

It's coming closer!

ROARING It's going to attack!

It's a...it's a legend.

Another mythical beast, like the unicorn!

But it's there! No!

The Minotaur is a mythical beast. Say it!

The Minotaur is a mythical
beast. It doesn't exist!

It's gone.

Yes.

Yes, I'm afraid we made it
too difficult for it to stay.

Come on. Let's go and find Jamie.

I think this is the place. Yes.

There's no sign of him.

I'm sure he wouldn't
have gone off without...

What's that? His jacket.

Well, he must be around here somewhere.
Jamie!

Who's that?

Oh! Oh, my dear sir! Your servant, sir.

You have a knack of turning up unexpectedly.
Have you seen Jamie?

I walked alone but saw no
sign of any inhabitants.

Are you absolutely positive?

I would not impose any falsities upon you.

I adhere strictly to truth. Of course.

This...this person who
controls this place...

The Master? The Master. Yes.

Have you seen him?

Upon occasion he has been
pleased to grant me an audience.

Where might I find him?

The Master's palace is no
ordinary edifice but a citadel,

a walled town at the top of a hill or cliff,

which is reckoned the
highest in the kingdom.

Yes. Now I think I understand.

May I ask, sir, where you come from?

Would it not be Nottingham?

My father had a small estate in Nottingham,
sir.

I was the third of five sons.

He sent me to Emmanuel College
in Cambridge at 14 years old,

where I applied myself close to my studies,

learning navigation and other
parts of the mathematics...

"Useful for those who intend to travel..."

..as I always believed it would be,
some time or other,

my fortune to do.

Now I know who you are, sir!

Your name is Lemuel Gulliver.
Your servant, sir.

Gulliver? Yes, yes.

Oh, I'm looking forward to a long
talk with you one of these days.

I should like that above all things, but...

..it would not be proper at
this juncture to trouble you

with the particulars of my adventures.

I wouldn't dream of detaining you.

Having been condemned by nature and fortune

to a restless and active life,
I must take my leave of you.

Farewell. Farewell.

Why does he talk in such
an extraordinary way?

He can only speak the words
that Dean Swift gave him to say.

But that's ridiculous. I mean,
there never was such a person as Gulliver.

He's a fictional character.

Of course he is. Don't you understand?

This world that we've tumbled
into is a world of fiction -

unicorns, Minotaurs, Gulliver's Travels.

They're all alive here.

Then what are WE doing here?

What do they want with us?

I'm not sure I understand that yet.

Come along. Let's find Jamie.
You'd better put this on.

BIRDSONG

RHYTHMIC CREAKING

METALLIC SCRAPING

RHYTHMIC CREAKING CONTINUES

CREAKING STOPS

Oh, no.

I'd need to be a human
fly to get up that lot.

I can't go back, though.
What I really need is a...

Who says wishes don't come true?

RHYTHMIC CREAKING

So far, so good.

Some sort of castle.

Well, Jamie, now where?

Well, you don't have much choice, do you?

Ouch!

I suppose you know that hurts?

You mean this is your hair? Of course.

I don't object to people climbing it.
I'm quite used to it, actually.

But you would keep tugging so.
Oh, I'm terribly sorry.

Are you a prince? No. Why?

You're supposed to be.

I'm a princess, but I suppose you knew that.

My name's Rapunzel.
You're not a woodcutter's son, by any chance?

No. I'm the son of a piper.
Oh, how very disappointing.

In that case, you'd better go. Goodbye.

Oh, Your Highness, wait. Well?

I can't go back there. It's a sheer drop.

And, well, I can't just stand out here.

I'll have to climb in through the window.

Oh, well,
I don't know if that would be allowed.

Well, I won't stay long.

Just passing through, you might say.

Please.
It's a great pity you're not a prince.

You'd have made rather a good one.

Well, I suppose you'd better come inside.

But for goodness' sake, be quiet.

Rapunzel?

Your Highness, where have you gone?

Don't be silly. I'm not going...

Hey, this doesn't look like the inside

of a princess's castle to me.

"'Christmas won't be Christmas
without any presents,'

"grumbled Jo, lying on the rug.

"'It's so dreadful to be poor,'
sighed Meg, looking down at her..."

HE TURNS MACHINE OFF

CLICKING

"The Doctor and Zoe...

"..unable to find their
companion in the labyrinth,

"decided to return to the
cave in search of him,

"where a new terror awaited them."

I imagine there must be
at least one more test.

I wonder what it'll be.

I believe you're actually
beginning to enjoy all this.

That wasn't there before, was it?

A statue. Like the unicorn.

Yes,

only the unicorn was alive
first and then became a statue.

Only this time... What? Have a care, Zoe.

I have a feeling the situation
is going to be reversed.

It IS coming to life!

HISSING

Medusa!

CLICKING

"The Doctor and Zoe

"were face-to-face with Medusa.

"One glance from her eyes would...

"..would turn them to stone!"

Now, we know what we have to do, Zoe. Yes.

HISSING

She's moving. She's going to look at us!

Zoe, we have to say,

"Medusa does not exist." But she does!

Zoe, Medusa is a myth!

If you believe in her, she can turn
us BOTH to stone. Now, Zoe, say it.

The Medusa is a myth. Say it!

But she's alive! No! She's real! No!

Don't look in her eyes! Don't look!

HISSING

The Medusa does not exist.
You must believe that.

I can feel her fingertips like ice!
No. That's marble.

Think of her as a marble statue. A legend.

But she's real!
I've got to look at her! I've got to!

One glance from her eyes
would turn them to stone...

..but all was not yet lost.

Suddenly, the Doctor found a
sword at his feet, picked it up...

..and with one stroke slew the monster.

A sword.
You're meant to use it like Perseus.

Maybe it's another trap. Doctor, please!

No. How can I kill something
that doesn't exist?

I've got to open my eyes. I've got to see.

Wait!

Perseus. Of course. A mirror.

There. Look at her reflection in the mirror.
Look.

Can you see her? Yes.

This is how Perseus escaped.

He looked at her reflection
in his polished shield.

There's no danger in the reflection.

It's safe now. You can look now.

The statue has become a statue again.

Cancel. Cancel. Cancel.

The Doctor test, report failure.

Failure?

ALARM SOUNDS

Attention. Attention.
There is a stranger inside the building.

Call out the search party.

Ah, the young traveller. I had wondered.

Have you been sent to find me?

His companions were in a state
of anxiety about his whereabouts.

Companions! Zoe and the Doctor.
Where are they?

Safe and well. You've spoken to them?

The gentleman desired to
know where I came from

and whither I was bound. STATIC BUZZES

What's that?

I heard nothing. Probably that search party.

By the laws of this kingdom,
every chamber must be searched.

If they find me, I'm done for.
You should be put to death.

What about you? I should come to no harm.

If you give me away this time, I'm finished!

I was ready with the hazard of
my life to defend his person.

Where have they gone? Hm? The white robots.

Young sir, I do assure you,
there were no such persons here.

Aye. Robots or not,
I'm getting out of this place.

You desire your liberty!

Yes. I got in all right,
but how do I get out?

After some consideration,
I was of the opinion that...

Go on, go on.

..this was altogether impossible.

Oh, yes. That's the citadel, all right.

The question is, how do we get up there?

It's a long way to climb. ZAPPING

Zoe, duck.

The Karkus. You are my prisoners.

It's the Karkus. What?

Come out and put ze hands above ze head.

You know. He's fictional too.
Obey or I fire.

With that thing? What sort of a gun is that?

An anti-molecular ray disintegrator.

Rubbish.
Such a weapon is scientifically impossible.

It doesn't exist.

Argh!

That seems to have taken care of that.

I shall tear you limb from limb.

Doctor, be careful. He could do it.

The Karkus has superhuman strength!

You will be mincemeat.

Doctor, say it.
You know he's a fictional character!

But I've never heard of him!

THEY ALL SHOUT

What are you doing?

Please, I'm sure we can talk this over. Oh!

Argh!

Zoe. Lesson 17!

Be careful. Oh, dear.

Lesson 32.

GROWLING

Ah!

Oh!

Don't do anything rash.

YELLING

GROWLING

HE GROANS

Mercy. You'd better submit...

The neck can't take much pressure. Help...!

Do you submit? I submit!

That's better.

I am your slave. Command me.

Do you know the way to the citadel?
I know it.

Take us up there, there's a good chap.

I obey.

We all follow his adventures in the
"Hourly Telepress".

A strip cartoon of the year 2000?

You've been in the year 2000?

Yes, but I had no time to follow cartoons.

You'd better start following this one.
He's halfway there. Come on!

Well, thank you, Mr...
What did you say his name was?

K-A-R-K-U-S. Oh, yes. Mr Karkus. Thank you.

We won't be needing you any longer.
Run along.

I obey.

Come along.

You can't just ring the bell.

Why not? It's the usual way.

BELL RINGS

Are you sure this is a good idea?

State your name and attribution.

I am the Karkus.

And your attribution? What's that? Sh!

Year 2000 comic strip creation.

"The Hourly Telepress".

Authenticated. You may enter.

DOOR CREAKS

Come on!
You heard them giving orders to look for me.

Why do you suppose that happened?

These were orders given by
some person in authority.

The Master? It is possible.

Now I'm getting somewhere. Listen...

If there aren't any robots,

who do you think was
carrying out those orders?

Who was I hiding from?

Why, sir, the Yahoos. Who's the Yahoos?

Inferior creatures.
I never beheld so disagreeable an animal.

I haven't seen any Yahoos,
you haven't seen any robots...

Jamie! Stay where you are.

There's an electrical gadget
that sets off an alarm.

The gong went off and
they sent robots after me.

Robots? The ones we saw before?
Big white ones, aye.

Doctor, did you hear that?
Yes. I thought they'd turn up.

It's a simple photo-electric cell.
I'd better lift you over it.

Careful, because... Oh, my jacket.

What happened when you left the tunnel?
I was chased

by one of those tin soldiers.
I climbed up the cliff.

How do we get out? I'm not leaving yet.
I'm here on business.

The Doctor's going to see the Master.

This resolution may
appear bold and dangerous.

You see? Why do you say that?

I think you should not be here.

The Master makes rules for his kingdom.
It is unwise to disobey.

So we shouldn't see the Master?

My advice is to swear a
peace with the Master.

Find a place to lodge, stay with the
expectation that things would mend.

Yes. Well, I'll see.
I'll think it over very carefully.

Your servant. Your servant.

Your servant.

You're not going to do as he says? No.

I said I'd think it over.
I've thought it over. We're staying.

We'll be fighting in the dark!

We won't know where the
next attack will come from.

Medusa was bad enough. Ah, Medusa.

I read about that on this machine.

Wee words keep coming out of it.
Let's have a look.

There. Look.

Cancel...
The Doctor, test report - failure...

I'm beginning to understand. I wish I was.

When somebody writes about an
incident after it's happened,

that is history. Yes...

But when the writing comes first,
that's fiction.

If we'd have fallen into the Master's trap,

we would have become fiction.

That's horrible. Let's get out of here.
Zoe, don't go...

Not from there!

BEEP

Oh, no! TANNOY: Attention.
There are still strangers at large.

Renew the search.
The strangers must be found.

What are we going to do?
Gulliver walked through.

Gulliver is not real - we are.

They're coming. Where can we hide?

No need to hide.
If they find us... STATIC BUZZES

Let them find us. Just wait?!

Yes. We'll ask for an
interview with the Master.

They may not give us time to ask... Look!

Are you looking for us?

STATIC BUZZES

We demand an interview with the Master!

CHUCKLING

How very fortunate. Do come in, Doctor.

I've been expecting you.

Oh, don't be alarmed.
Won't you walk into my parlour?

Said the spider to the fly...

Come along.

It's hard to see anything. Where are you?

Here. Patiently waiting.

Oh, Doctor. This is a great pleasure.

And your two young companions.
Let me see. Oh, yes.

Zoe and Jamie. I have your dossiers here.

You're well organised. Yes. We have to be.

Running this place requires
enormous attention to detail.

It's a responsible position,
but very rewarding.

Responsible, eh?

To someone else?
Not to someone. Another power.

Higher than any you could begin to imagine.

I must congratulate you on the great skill

in which you tackled your examination.

What is the purpose of all these tests?

When I was first brought here myself,

I was as bewildered as you are.

How long have you been here?

I left England in the summer of 1926.

HE CHUCKLES

It was a very hot day, I remember.

Hm.

I think I must have dozed off over my desk,
and when I awoke...

Ho-ho-ho! But that's a long story.

Did you ever hear of the adventures
of Captain Jack Harkaway?

No, I can't say that I...

Wait a minute!

A serial in a boys' magazine?
The Ensign! The Ensign...

And for 25 years,
I delivered 5,000 words every week.

You're a writer.

25 years, 5,000 words a week.

That's over half a million words.
Yes. It was probably a record.

That's why I was selected to work here.

You're in charge of all this?
In one sense, yes.

Yes. Or is all this in charge of you?

My brain...is the source
of the creative power,

which keeps this whole operation going.

I see. That means that you
are virtually a prisoner.

Oh, no, no, no, no...

ALARM BLARES

CRACKLING

Oh...

You must excuse me for one moment.

Let's get out of here.
It gives me the creeps.

No, I need to find out more.

Keep him talking and Zoe
and me will find a way out.

I think it'll be safer
to all stick together.

Oh, sorry to have kept you.

Where were we?

You were about to answer my question.
Are you a prisoner here?

Well, no. No, I wouldn't say that...

In fact, I rather like being here.

I have everything I could possibly want.

This vast library with all
the known works of fiction.

All the masterpieces written by Earthmen

since the beginning of time!

I don't think he noticed.
No. Let's try down there.

I see, yes.
And only an Earthman-type creature

has the power to create fiction.
The power to imagine.

Exactly!

This is one field in which the
intelligence I serve cannot compete.

They need a man,
of boundless imagination as a...

..a powerhouse, a lifeline, you might say.

What is this intelligence you
serve and why was I brought here?

Well, as you see, I'm no longer young,

whereas you, Doctor, are ageless.

You exist outside the
barriers of time and space.

And you want me...

To take over this unique situation!

To take my place.

I refuse.

ALARM BLARES

CRACKLING

Refusal is impossible.

You are here to serve us.

There is no alternative.

STATIC BUZZES

We've got to find a way out!
There must be a door somewhere.

We've got to get the Doctor away before...
Jamie!

Stop!

No. Back this way.

Resistance is useless.

Submit your will for the
sake of the greater good.

It has been decided.

I refuse.

I shall make that decision for myself.

You will find there is only
one decision open to you.

Mission accomplished. Procedure as arranged.

What does that mean?

The latest chapter of the serial story.

I'll read you the last sentence.

Zoe and Jamie attempted to escape,

but...in making through the library,

they were ambushed by a party
of guards and overpowered.

Oh, no! Jamie. Zoe!

Are you prepared to co-operate now?

Your life in return for theirs?

Is that a bargain?

HE LAUGHS

Look.

HE MOANS, STRAINS

Oh, Jamie, my eyes!

I can't see. Where are you?

Quick, back. Get away.

Zoe, here, quick.

Oh!

No. It's a book. Back out again! Oh, no!

Oh, push. Open up. It's closing.

No! Argh!

What have you done?!

They're no longer human,
just fictional characters.

If you consent to take my place here,
they can be released.

You really would do that?
No, my dear sir. YOU would.

Once you take up your post here,

it can be your first official
task as the new controller.

I see. How very ingenious.
I take it, then, that you agree?

No! My answer is still no.

How very unfortunate.

I'm sorry to have to use violent methods,
but you must submit.

You have no alternative.

I have yet to see a robot that can climb!

You cannot escape...

..but we will play your
game a little longer.

HE LAUGHS WICKEDLY

Doctor! Ah, Zoe! Jamie!

Am I glad to see you?!
The Master said you'd been...

Where do we go from here?
Back to the TARDIS.

We can't. It fell apart. Don't you remember?

It's all over now, thank goodness.
The TARDIS broke up.

Yes, you said that. I'm tired.
I think I'll sit down.

Is something wrong, Zoe?

Where do we go? To the TARDIS.

We can't. It broke up. Don't you remember?

But you...keep saying the same things.

The TARDIS broke up.

Then, it's true. They're not real.

They've been turned into fiction.

What's this?

The master tape!

I wonder...

Perhaps if I were to create

a few immortal words of fiction of my own...

Yes. It's worth trying.

What I need is the strength of Karkus.

I am at your command!

Oh, thank you, my dear sir.

Perhaps you could release this for me.

This is what you want?

No. I want to get down here somehow.

Ah. Wait. Oh, thank you.

Jamie.

Jamie, Zoe. You are being controlled.

Jamie, listen. Listen.

Oh, it's no use.

A rope.

Oh, thank you. Ouch! Careful.

Oh. Yes, of course.

You are the Princess Rapunzel.

Are you a prince? No, I'm afraid not.

Would you mind if I used
your hair to get down there?

No, of course not. Everybody else uses it.

Thank you. Where can we attach the...?
Oh, yes, of course.

KEYS CLACK

Yes, yes. Go on!

The enemy had been finally
defeated by the Doctor.

No, no. I can't say that. If I say that...

I nearly fell for it.

Another two seconds,
and I should have turned myself into fiction!

Halt.

Now we shall play games no longer.

I'm very obliged to you both.
Always happy to be of assistance.

Jamie and Zoe. I left them here.
Where are they? Jamie! Zoe!

They had to make a departure.
It was necessary.

They'll be back soon. What's been happening?

You must have SOME idea. Is it a game?

Please! Please! I must think!

There must be a way out of this.
There's GOT to be.

"Jamie and Zoe realised at last

"that the Doctor was, in fact,

"the most monstrous and cunning villain.

"There was no punishment too severe

"for the crimes that he had committed."

Splendid. Splendid.
Come closer, my children.

You sent for us, Master?

Now you know what the Doctor is really like,
don't you?

He's the most monstrous and cunning villain.

No punishment is too severe for his crimes.

Word perfect.
That is why I sent for you both

at this moment of crisis.

We need your help. What must we do?

Well...

# A pocketful of posies

# A-tishoo. A-tishoo

# We all fall down! #

You are in an unhappy situation.

Is there anything we can do to help?

I only wish there was. Look!

What's that?! I never saw it before.

The TARDIS!

Safe and sound! By all that's wonderful!

Are you ready? The time has come.
The time? To leave!

How did you find the TARDIS?
We'll explain later. Come on!

Just as I was thinking that all was over.

Oh, no. It's not over yet, Doctor.

Not yet.

THEY LAUGH

Agh! Jamie! Zoe!

THEY LAUGH

What's happening?!

The children obeyed perfectly.

Their mission is completed.

Now perhaps we can get down to business.

As you refused to take over at the controls,

we were forced to incorporate
you into the computer.

To what purpose?

To bring planet Earth under our control.

And its people?
We have no wish to destroy them.

Merely adjust their minds
to suit our purpose.

Sausages. Man would become like a
string of sausages - all the same.

Man will simply vanish from
the Earth and reappear here.

Leaving Earth undamaged and
uninhabited for you to take over.

Precisely. If I co-operate.

You have no alternative.
You are part of the Master Brain.

So the computer feeds off my thoughts,
does it?

Correct.

Then, it will create what I think.

Oh, no. No.
You're now under control of the Master Brain.

Are you so sure?
You couldn't control my mind before

and you can't control it now.

Submit! No!

You've given me equal power.
It's a battle of wits between you and me.

Oh, no. No. No!

Stop. Stop.

Jamie, Zoe.

Can you hear me? Think for yourselves.
Don't be afraid.

You CAN open the book. Go on, you can do it.

Oh. Oh, dear.

This is against everything
we ever worked for.

Warning, warning! WHIRRING

Emergency action. Emergency. Emergency!

Don't worry about fiction.
Hang on to real life. You've got to get out.

Calling white robots.

Guards will enter the control centre.

The Master Brain must be protected.

What IS it? What are you saying?

A game? We are not in the same service.

You're going away from us.

Push, Zoe. Push hard.

We WILL get out.

Soldiers! To the roof. Immediately!

Jamie, Zoe, concentrate.

You've got to get out of there.
Now push. Harder!

Harder!

Splendid!

Soldiers, forward! Seize them. Destroy them.

No! Jamie, Zoe, run.

Get back, Zoe!

Can't you help us?

We obey our creator.
That is all that can be expected

of any character,
unless the Master says otherwise.

And now, Doctor, obey me.

No!

Suddenly the Karkus came to their rescue.

I am at your command.

He raised his anti-molecular
disintegrator gun

and destroyed the soldiers.

No! But the Karkus realised his mistake,

and turned back to face his real enemies,
Jamie and Zoe.

What's he doing? Duck, Zoe!

With Jamie and Zoe firmly in his sights,

the Karkus pressed the trigger of his gun.

But all the power had been used up
on the soldiers and it was useless.

Ooh, you'll have to do better than that!

Suddenly, a swashbuckling figure appeared.

Poet and swordsman,
the famous Cyrano de Bergerac.

Remorselessly, Cyrano advanced on those

who had dared to poke fun at his nose.

But wait.

He found himself face-to-face
with the fearless musketeer

and fearless swordsman, D'Artagnan.

Jamie, Zoe, get away from there!

Come on, Zoe.

Princess Rapunzel,
can we use your hair again? Of course.

Why are we going down there?
We've got to find the Doctor.

Stop them. Substitute cutlass for rapier.
Cancel Cyrano.

Blackbeard the Pirate.

Cancel D'Artagnan.

Substitute Sir Lancelot in full armour.

This way.

The Doctor is expendable.
Expendable. He will be destroyed.

Oh, no, no. He's the only person.
There's nobody else.

I can't go on for ever.

Please give me another chance.

You have failed.

The Master Brain must be
protected against overloading.

Robot force will deal with him.

Change robot weapon to destructor beam.

BUZZING, WHIRRING

Remove him.

Oh, my goodness.

Uh, as...as the white robots
advanced on the Doc...

No, I can't say that! I can't say that.

No, Doctor.
You can't save yourself this time.

Bring him out.

What can we do? We can't fight those brutes.

No, but the computer

must control everything,
the robots included.

The Master said it must be
protected against overloading.

It is a pity that we have to destroy

such an intelligent mind as yours, Doctor,

but you leave us no alternative.

Disintegrate.

SCREECHING, BEEPING, WHIRRING

Stop them!

They will overload the Master Brain!

Destroy them. Destroy!

Zoe, duck!

BANGING, EXPLOSIONS

Zoe? Jamie? Oh, my goodness!

Shouldn't we go? Yes. Jamie, give me a hand.

What do you want to bring him for?
Don't argue, Jamie, give me a hand.

I don't see why we had to bring him.
He caused all this trouble.

Are you all right, sir?
I'm not altogether sure where I am.

Is this the office of the Ensign magazine?

You were kidnapped, like we were.
They've been using your mind.

What happens to us now?

That depends on the white robots.

Their last order was to destroy.

Let's hope they're destroying one another.

What about the Karkus and
Gulliver and our friends?

You can't blow up a fictional character.

But what about us, though?

We'll have to hope the destruction

of the computer returns us all to reality.

Do you mean I'm going home? I hope so.

But it could just as well
send us into oblivion.

Vanish for ever?! We shall soon know.

Hang on. Here it comes.

Oh, that was scary.

Those clockwork soldiers
gave me the shivers.

Still, we got away by the skin of our teeth.

The story of our lives.

And you've got a different face.

Sorry about that. Aye.

Maybe we should go back there,
swap this old one for a new one.

No chance. You look very distinguished.

Ah, thank you.

Well, who'd have thought,
president and a Highlander sharing stories.

I can get used to this.

Well, we can't stay here forever, Jamie.
There's people who need us.

But suppose we went back
and forgot all over again.

Well, whatever this place is,
it's restored our memories, for good.

I think all we need to do,
if we want to come back here,

is to close our eyes and remember it.

Maybe we're in heaven.

I hope not. I'm a very busy woman.

Oh, so does Madame President
have time for another story?

Go on, then.

Ice Warriors.

Oh, how can I forget those
great lumbering lizards?

And poor Victoria, screamed her
lungs out when she first saw them.

Nearly brought down a mountain.

I wonder if she's still out there somewhere?

Oh, I bet she is.

I wonder if we all come here eventually?

All the Doctor's friends?

I hope she had a nice life.

I'm sure she did.

I bet she thought of you every single day.

Because there's one thing I know for sure,

I will never, ever forget this again.