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1
00:00:16,200 --> 00:00:18,670
What's this? Metal detecting, are you?
2
00:00:18,720 --> 00:00:20,630
Oh...
3
00:00:20,680 --> 00:00:21,790
Pardon?
4
00:00:21,840 --> 00:00:23,320
Metal detecting?
5
00:00:25,160 --> 00:00:26,270
That's right.
6
00:00:26,320 --> 00:00:28,150
Found anything?
7
00:00:28,200 --> 00:00:29,310
Bits and bobs.
8
00:00:29,360 --> 00:00:31,830
Oh, good luck. Maybe you'll strike gold.
9
00:00:31,880 --> 00:00:34,040
Yes. See ya.
10
00:00:44,040 --> 00:00:45,080
Hello.
11
00:00:47,280 --> 00:00:48,440
Looking for treasure?
12
00:00:49,480 --> 00:00:50,510
Something like that.
13
00:00:50,560 --> 00:00:51,750
What have you found?
14
00:00:51,800 --> 00:00:53,430
Oh, bits and pieces.
15
00:00:53,480 --> 00:00:54,470
No gold?
16
00:00:54,520 --> 00:00:55,670
Nope.
17
00:00:55,720 --> 00:00:56,710
Well, fingers crossed.
18
00:00:56,760 --> 00:00:58,280
Yeah. See ya.
19
00:01:02,000 --> 00:01:02,990
All right.
20
00:01:03,040 --> 00:01:06,470
This is a problem. It's a public
footpath, there's bloody ramblers
21
00:01:06,520 --> 00:01:09,070
coming by asking the same
questions all the time.
22
00:01:09,120 --> 00:01:10,400
Oh, here come some more.
23
00:01:12,280 --> 00:01:17,030
Ah, metal detectors. We had a metal
detector once, didn't we, Rosemary?
24
00:01:17,080 --> 00:01:18,870
That's still in the garage.
25
00:01:18,920 --> 00:01:20,470
Is that so?
26
00:01:20,520 --> 00:01:22,950
- Have you found any gold?
- Ah, Jesus.
27
00:01:23,000 --> 00:01:25,790
- Pardon?
- No, no, no gold. No, no.
28
00:01:25,840 --> 00:01:28,990
- Fingers crossed.
- Fingers crossed, yeah.
29
00:01:29,040 --> 00:01:32,350
Tell me, how many more
of you are coming through?
30
00:01:32,400 --> 00:01:35,880
Of us? About 50 today, I think.
31
00:01:43,280 --> 00:01:44,670
Call it a day?
32
00:01:44,720 --> 00:01:45,960
Probably best.
33
00:01:56,160 --> 00:02:00,550
♪ Will you search through
the lonely earth for me?
34
00:02:00,600 --> 00:02:05,590
♪ Climb through the briar and bramble
35
00:02:05,640 --> 00:02:08,390
♪ I'll be your treasure... ♪
36
00:02:08,440 --> 00:02:10,230
Mate, that was a good couple of hours.
37
00:02:10,280 --> 00:02:12,390
Yeah. Were you getting good stuff?
38
00:02:12,440 --> 00:02:15,070
Me, too...
39
00:02:15,120 --> 00:02:17,190
.. bloody ramblers notwithstanding.
40
00:02:17,240 --> 00:02:20,990
It's all Roman. Nothing spectacular,
but five of these little bronzes.
41
00:02:21,040 --> 00:02:23,950
And that's part of
something, not sure what.
42
00:02:24,000 --> 00:02:26,350
Same here. Roman grots.
43
00:02:26,400 --> 00:02:27,840
Four or five of 'em.
44
00:02:29,720 --> 00:02:31,710
How many times have we searched this field
45
00:02:31,760 --> 00:02:33,950
and only now it starts
throwing up its treasure?
46
00:02:34,000 --> 00:02:38,590
Six weeks' time, this'll be solar
panels as far as the eye can see.
47
00:02:38,640 --> 00:02:40,520
Less than six weeks.
48
00:02:41,720 --> 00:02:43,790
Doesn't exactly make
your heart sing, does it?
49
00:02:43,840 --> 00:02:47,030
Oh, well. Sic biscuitus deteriatum.
50
00:02:47,080 --> 00:02:50,430
See University Challenge last night?
51
00:02:50,480 --> 00:02:52,270
Yeah.
52
00:02:52,320 --> 00:02:56,350
What three letter generic name is
given to the bird family Paridae?
53
00:02:56,400 --> 00:02:57,430
Bzz!
54
00:02:57,480 --> 00:02:59,270
- Balliol, Potts.
- Tit.
55
00:02:59,320 --> 00:03:01,830
Tit is correct, yes.
56
00:03:01,880 --> 00:03:04,590
- Classic.
- Classic.
57
00:03:04,640 --> 00:03:06,120
Hello there!
58
00:03:07,680 --> 00:03:09,320
Speaking of tits...
59
00:03:11,200 --> 00:03:13,990
Heeeeeello there.
60
00:03:14,040 --> 00:03:15,710
What are you doing here?
61
00:03:15,760 --> 00:03:18,190
Oh, just... passing by.
62
00:03:18,240 --> 00:03:19,830
You're always just passing by.
63
00:03:19,880 --> 00:03:22,160
You must come miles out
of your way to pass by.
64
00:03:23,520 --> 00:03:25,350
It must seem like that, yes.
65
00:03:25,400 --> 00:03:29,390
No, we haven't seen you
since your amazing find,
66
00:03:29,440 --> 00:03:31,670
your golden astel.
67
00:03:31,720 --> 00:03:33,750
Wanted to congratulate you, actually.
68
00:03:33,800 --> 00:03:37,190
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah. Really fantastic.
69
00:03:37,240 --> 00:03:38,670
How's it feel?
70
00:03:38,720 --> 00:03:42,910
What, to have a piece with my name
underneath it in the British Museum?
71
00:03:42,960 --> 00:03:45,520
Feels good.
72
00:03:46,920 --> 00:03:50,710
I imagine it does. Well, congratulations.
73
00:03:50,760 --> 00:03:51,790
Here's to you.
74
00:03:51,840 --> 00:03:53,190
Mrs Robinson.
75
00:03:53,240 --> 00:03:54,670
- Pardon?
- Nothing.
76
00:03:54,720 --> 00:03:57,030
Is that all you came to say?
77
00:03:57,080 --> 00:03:58,870
That and to...
78
00:03:58,920 --> 00:04:02,720
.. wave a white flag, so to speak.
79
00:04:04,160 --> 00:04:07,430
Don't you think it's time we
put our differences behind us?
80
00:04:07,480 --> 00:04:09,350
Maybe pool resources?
81
00:04:09,400 --> 00:04:10,750
What resources?
82
00:04:10,800 --> 00:04:12,870
Well, our permissions.
83
00:04:12,920 --> 00:04:15,310
We've got more than enough
land to detect on and...
84
00:04:15,360 --> 00:04:18,230
well, this farm here, it's...
85
00:04:18,280 --> 00:04:19,750
far too big for just the two of you.
86
00:04:19,800 --> 00:04:22,670
If you've got more than enough
land, why do you want to come here?
87
00:04:22,720 --> 00:04:24,670
- Well sometimes it's good...
- Duh-duh-duh-duh.
88
00:04:24,720 --> 00:04:26,200
I wasn't talking to you, Paul.
89
00:04:28,760 --> 00:04:30,950
More choice. Different topography.
90
00:04:31,000 --> 00:04:33,830
- You don't have any
permissions, do you? - We do.
91
00:04:33,880 --> 00:04:35,070
Oh, yeah. Where?
92
00:04:35,120 --> 00:04:37,670
Well, I'm not going to tell you, am I?
93
00:04:37,720 --> 00:04:39,270
Unless you agree to share.
94
00:04:39,320 --> 00:04:40,880
Oh! Right.
95
00:04:43,880 --> 00:04:46,630
We have some prime locations.
96
00:04:46,680 --> 00:04:47,840
Oh, do you?
97
00:04:51,520 --> 00:04:53,280
I know what you're doing.
98
00:04:54,480 --> 00:04:55,470
What am I doing?
99
00:04:55,520 --> 00:04:56,830
You're doing a Jimmy waffle-on.
100
00:04:56,880 --> 00:04:59,510
No, I'm not. No, I've just
got an itchy chin, that's all.
101
00:04:59,560 --> 00:05:02,030
Ooh, yeah, I've got a bit
of an itchy chin as well.
102
00:05:02,080 --> 00:05:03,830
Tell us about these permissions.
103
00:05:03,880 --> 00:05:05,390
And now you're both doing it.
104
00:05:05,440 --> 00:05:07,480
You're both doing a Jimmy waffle-on.
105
00:05:09,000 --> 00:05:10,030
Aren't they?
106
00:05:10,080 --> 00:05:11,430
- Chinny reckon? Yeah.
- Mm-hmm.
107
00:05:11,480 --> 00:05:13,030
- Mm-hmm.
- No, we're not.
108
00:05:13,080 --> 00:05:16,350
No, we've both just got
itchy chins, that's all.
109
00:05:16,400 --> 00:05:19,480
Really? Pathetic.
110
00:05:20,640 --> 00:05:21,880
Come on, Paul.
111
00:05:30,240 --> 00:05:32,160
Spanners.
112
00:05:53,360 --> 00:05:55,440
Kate, are you here?
113
00:05:57,600 --> 00:05:59,590
Kate, can I have a word?
114
00:05:59,640 --> 00:06:00,680
Just a minute!
115
00:06:06,120 --> 00:06:08,470
Hello, Dad. Sorry, I'm running late again.
116
00:06:08,520 --> 00:06:10,350
Now, Kate, we need to have a chat.
117
00:06:10,400 --> 00:06:12,870
Dad, can we maybe take
this down, this poster?
118
00:06:12,920 --> 00:06:15,230
What, the tennis lady? Why?
119
00:06:15,280 --> 00:06:16,990
Don't you think it's a bit tacky?
120
00:06:17,040 --> 00:06:19,070
Tacky? No.
121
00:06:19,120 --> 00:06:22,310
And a bit... well, degrading to women.
122
00:06:22,360 --> 00:06:24,550
Kate, she's scratching her bottom.
123
00:06:24,600 --> 00:06:27,040
Dad, she's got no knickers on.
124
00:06:28,080 --> 00:06:29,830
Hasn't she?
125
00:06:29,880 --> 00:06:32,160
I'm late. I'll talk to you later.
126
00:06:34,040 --> 00:06:36,870
Oh, Dad?
127
00:06:36,920 --> 00:06:40,030
- Mm? - I think there's
a squirrel in the flat.
128
00:06:40,080 --> 00:06:41,520
See ya.
129
00:07:02,200 --> 00:07:03,760
Huh!
130
00:07:05,440 --> 00:07:06,520
Haa!
131
00:07:10,080 --> 00:07:11,960
Hoo-yoo!
132
00:07:28,280 --> 00:07:29,320
Aargh!
133
00:07:38,160 --> 00:07:41,950
Ow! Ow! Ooh! Ooh!
134
00:07:42,000 --> 00:07:43,550
Ooh, bloody hell!
135
00:07:43,600 --> 00:07:45,640
Ooh, bloody, bloody hell!
136
00:07:46,840 --> 00:07:48,550
It was terrible.
137
00:07:48,600 --> 00:07:52,390
I was going from room to room
with a saucepan and a mop handle,
138
00:07:52,440 --> 00:07:54,990
poking under furniture, shaking curtains.
139
00:07:55,040 --> 00:07:57,550
It took me an hour and a
half to search the flat.
140
00:07:57,600 --> 00:07:58,630
And no squirrel?
141
00:07:58,680 --> 00:07:59,830
I didn't find one.
142
00:07:59,880 --> 00:08:01,680
She was winding you up.
143
00:08:03,440 --> 00:08:04,950
You think she was winding me up?
144
00:08:05,000 --> 00:08:06,320
Sounds like a wind-up.
145
00:08:08,440 --> 00:08:12,470
Well, that's what it's like -- chaos.
146
00:08:12,520 --> 00:08:14,590
And she never makes a
plan and sticks to it,
147
00:08:14,640 --> 00:08:15,950
so I never know if she's in.
148
00:08:16,000 --> 00:08:17,070
So where does that leave us
149
00:08:17,120 --> 00:08:19,350
if you can't come and
stay with me on my boat?
150
00:08:19,400 --> 00:08:22,430
I know. I've been looking
into remedies for seasickness.
151
00:08:22,480 --> 00:08:26,160
So have I. I think you
should try hypnotherapy.
152
00:08:27,880 --> 00:08:30,790
I've always tried to steer
clear of the mystical.
153
00:08:30,840 --> 00:08:32,270
It's not mystical.
154
00:08:32,320 --> 00:08:34,350
It is a bit mystical.
155
00:08:34,400 --> 00:08:38,630
I mean, I'm not afraid of
boats, it's the movement.
156
00:08:38,680 --> 00:08:41,030
Hypnotists can't stop
the boat from moving.
157
00:08:41,080 --> 00:08:43,550
Well, maybe he CAN... in your head.
158
00:08:43,600 --> 00:08:47,080
Let me get you an appointment.
159
00:08:48,080 --> 00:08:53,470
Well... take a brave man
to go poking around in here.
160
00:08:53,520 --> 00:08:56,720
Who knows what might be unleashed?
161
00:09:06,320 --> 00:09:09,480
I don't understand what we're doing here.
162
00:09:11,280 --> 00:09:13,950
Tim, there's nothing down here.
163
00:09:14,000 --> 00:09:15,560
Let's give it another hour.
164
00:09:17,400 --> 00:09:18,750
Tim!
165
00:09:18,800 --> 00:09:23,270
Tim, I think you better come and see this.
166
00:09:23,320 --> 00:09:24,510
Where's this?
167
00:09:24,560 --> 00:09:25,840
Just over here.
168
00:09:38,720 --> 00:09:39,960
Amazing.
169
00:09:41,480 --> 00:09:43,390
You see the flagstones protecting it?
170
00:09:43,440 --> 00:09:45,630
It's as if it was preserved
on purpose, a layer of sand
171
00:09:45,680 --> 00:09:48,150
- and then these stones on top.
- Do we know how far it extends?
172
00:09:48,200 --> 00:09:50,270
Well, at least another four
foot in that direction,
173
00:09:50,320 --> 00:09:52,390
- but maybe even further.
- Cover it up.
174
00:09:52,440 --> 00:09:53,910
Huh?
175
00:09:53,960 --> 00:09:56,160
Get a tarp or something.
176
00:09:57,960 --> 00:09:59,280
Cover it up.
177
00:10:02,920 --> 00:10:03,960
Hello!
178
00:10:07,800 --> 00:10:10,190
Oh, back there. How are you?
179
00:10:10,240 --> 00:10:11,880
Good to see you.
180
00:10:17,840 --> 00:10:19,990
It's all there, Becks, it has to be.
181
00:10:20,040 --> 00:10:23,540
I reckon the stones were put down
deliberately to protect the mosaic.
182
00:10:25,320 --> 00:10:26,920
I can see you.
183
00:10:46,400 --> 00:10:48,750
I think the whole floor might be complete.
184
00:10:48,800 --> 00:10:51,470
Honestly, I took off the edge
stone, the mosaic was right there.
185
00:10:51,520 --> 00:10:53,240
It's so beautiful, look.
186
00:10:59,240 --> 00:11:00,270
Oh, weird.
187
00:11:00,320 --> 00:11:01,550
What?
188
00:11:01,600 --> 00:11:03,510
I took at least five
photos, they're not here.
189
00:11:03,560 --> 00:11:05,390
Are you sure you saved them?
190
00:11:05,440 --> 00:11:06,910
Balls! Where are they?
191
00:11:06,960 --> 00:11:09,750
Oh, it doesn't matter, I'll take
some more when we lift the stones.
192
00:11:09,800 --> 00:11:11,710
That's brilliant. Congratulations.
193
00:11:11,760 --> 00:11:13,230
Thank you. And you know what?
194
00:11:13,280 --> 00:11:15,710
I saw, at last, some enthusiasm in Tim.
195
00:11:15,760 --> 00:11:19,110
Usually nothing stirs him,
but he got quite emotional.
196
00:11:19,160 --> 00:11:21,710
Well, good, it sounds
like it's working out.
197
00:11:21,760 --> 00:11:25,960
Yeah. Yeah, I think it's working out.
198
00:11:30,040 --> 00:11:32,910
He can't make me do
anything against my will?
199
00:11:32,960 --> 00:11:36,470
You're always fully conscious,
just in a very relaxed state.
200
00:11:36,520 --> 00:11:41,430
So... he can't make me say
anything I'll regret later?
201
00:11:41,480 --> 00:11:43,200
No.
202
00:11:44,440 --> 00:11:47,360
Nothing specific. I'm
not hiding anything...
203
00:11:49,120 --> 00:11:50,470
.. to my knowledge.
204
00:11:50,520 --> 00:11:51,830
Just chill.
205
00:11:51,880 --> 00:11:55,320
Yeah, I'm just saying, I don't
want to blurt anything out.
206
00:11:57,080 --> 00:11:59,550
Do people tend do blurt?
207
00:11:59,600 --> 00:12:01,790
There's very little blurting.
208
00:12:01,840 --> 00:12:03,560
Oh, good, good.
209
00:12:05,520 --> 00:12:06,710
Mr Stater?
210
00:12:06,760 --> 00:12:07,750
Yes.
211
00:12:07,800 --> 00:12:09,150
Would you like to come through?
212
00:12:09,200 --> 00:12:10,190
Why?
213
00:12:10,240 --> 00:12:12,280
For your treatment. I'm Dr Hoffman.
214
00:12:14,120 --> 00:12:17,230
Are you? Is she?
215
00:12:17,280 --> 00:12:19,040
Yes, that's Dr Hoffman.
216
00:12:20,440 --> 00:12:23,040
Oh, yeah, great. Good, yeah.
217
00:12:24,120 --> 00:12:25,360
Let's go.
218
00:12:28,080 --> 00:12:30,350
- Don't be nervous.
- I'm not nervous.
219
00:12:30,400 --> 00:12:31,640
Try to relax.
220
00:12:34,800 --> 00:12:36,230
I want this to work.
221
00:12:36,280 --> 00:12:37,360
Me, too.
222
00:12:50,680 --> 00:12:53,910
That's it, just take a seat there
and make yourself comfortable.
223
00:12:53,960 --> 00:12:55,320
Oh...
224
00:12:56,560 --> 00:13:00,830
I was expecting, you know... hangings.
225
00:13:00,880 --> 00:13:02,040
Hangings?
226
00:13:03,040 --> 00:13:07,430
Tie-dyed wall hangings, wind
chimes, smell of patchouli.
227
00:13:07,480 --> 00:13:09,720
Oh, I see, like a mystic.
228
00:13:11,720 --> 00:13:14,030
You're not going to have
me doing Elvis, are you?
229
00:13:14,080 --> 00:13:15,750
No, no, nothing like that.
230
00:13:15,800 --> 00:13:18,230
Cos that's the thing, isn't it?
231
00:13:18,280 --> 00:13:21,230
You know, someone says
the word "fish and chips"
232
00:13:21,280 --> 00:13:24,910
and I am compelled to
sing and dance like Elvis.
233
00:13:24,960 --> 00:13:26,000
I suppose so.
234
00:13:27,760 --> 00:13:28,790
Could you do that?
235
00:13:28,840 --> 00:13:31,670
I'm not a stage hypnotist, Mr
Stater. Can I call you Lance?
236
00:13:31,720 --> 00:13:32,790
Please do.
237
00:13:32,840 --> 00:13:35,430
Great. So...
238
00:13:35,480 --> 00:13:40,270
the only way this can work is if
you are completely comfortable
239
00:13:40,320 --> 00:13:41,920
and relaxed.
240
00:13:54,640 --> 00:13:55,880
So, sit back.
241
00:13:57,120 --> 00:14:02,390
Success depends on you being
able to completely switch off,
242
00:14:02,440 --> 00:14:06,110
trust my voice and let it carry you away.
243
00:14:06,160 --> 00:14:07,950
I suppose it'd be difficult
244
00:14:08,000 --> 00:14:11,040
if you had an annoying
accent or a squeaky voice.
245
00:14:12,600 --> 00:14:14,390
So try and put those sorts of thoughts
246
00:14:14,440 --> 00:14:16,230
out of your mind for a while.
247
00:14:16,280 --> 00:14:18,680
Try to empty your mind.
248
00:14:20,200 --> 00:14:22,830
I will do exactly as you say.
249
00:14:22,880 --> 00:14:25,070
Well done.
250
00:14:25,120 --> 00:14:29,430
Just close your eyes and
listen to the sound of my voice.
251
00:14:29,480 --> 00:14:30,750
Listening.
252
00:14:30,800 --> 00:14:33,760
You don't have to tell me
you're listening, just listen.
253
00:14:37,560 --> 00:14:38,550
Got it.
254
00:14:38,600 --> 00:14:40,630
You don't have to say anything.
255
00:14:40,680 --> 00:14:43,150
Oh, I thought you were
waiting for a reply.
256
00:14:43,200 --> 00:14:44,470
- No.
- Cos you hesitated.
257
00:14:44,520 --> 00:14:45,830
I might do a lot of hesitating,
258
00:14:45,880 --> 00:14:47,980
but you don't need to
say anything, or worry.
259
00:14:49,520 --> 00:14:52,520
Just relax... and listen.
260
00:15:07,800 --> 00:15:14,350
So I want you to imagine that
you are lying on soft warm sand,
261
00:15:14,400 --> 00:15:15,950
on a beach.
262
00:15:16,000 --> 00:15:21,630
And it is a beautiful summer's
day and the sun is on your face.
263
00:15:21,680 --> 00:15:26,830
You've not got a care in the
world, or anything to do.
264
00:15:26,880 --> 00:15:32,070
You can just enjoy the sun all day.
265
00:15:32,120 --> 00:15:38,070
Sorry, sorry, I'm very sensitive
to the sun, I burn very easily.
266
00:15:38,120 --> 00:15:41,390
I wouldn't just sunbathe.
267
00:15:41,440 --> 00:15:44,270
Is carpet the same as sand?
268
00:15:44,320 --> 00:15:46,080
Could I lie in my flat?
269
00:15:47,440 --> 00:15:53,710
Yes. So you are lying on
the carpet in your flat.
270
00:15:53,760 --> 00:15:57,910
You are very comfortable
and warm, just right.
271
00:15:57,960 --> 00:16:02,710
And you can feel yourself
sinking into the carpet,
272
00:16:02,760 --> 00:16:06,710
sinking down through the carpet.
273
00:16:06,760 --> 00:16:09,990
Down. Down.
274
00:16:10,040 --> 00:16:11,910
And the carpet...
275
00:16:11,960 --> 00:16:13,670
No, no, the problem is...
276
00:16:13,720 --> 00:16:14,830
You live on the first floor?
277
00:16:14,880 --> 00:16:16,070
I live on the first floor.
278
00:16:16,120 --> 00:16:20,350
Exactly. So I'm sinking down
now into Mrs Morris's flat.
279
00:16:20,400 --> 00:16:21,630
She's going to be terrified.
280
00:16:21,680 --> 00:16:23,630
This is why it works best on a beach,
281
00:16:23,680 --> 00:16:25,830
because you can just keep on sinking.
282
00:16:25,880 --> 00:16:28,270
Have you got one of those sunshades?
283
00:16:28,320 --> 00:16:32,080
Maybe I could sit under one
of those big umbrellas.
284
00:16:33,800 --> 00:16:35,590
Yes, do that.
285
00:16:35,640 --> 00:16:38,550
Right, here we go, back on the beach.
286
00:16:38,600 --> 00:16:40,160
Carry on.
287
00:16:42,440 --> 00:16:44,040
Carry on-ez vous.
288
00:16:55,400 --> 00:16:56,710
You were very quick.
289
00:16:56,760 --> 00:17:00,270
I was out like a light.
Yeah, like that, sparko.
290
00:17:00,320 --> 00:17:01,350
Really?
291
00:17:01,400 --> 00:17:03,990
Yeah. No. I feel different.
292
00:17:04,040 --> 00:17:07,390
I feel like I don't suffer
from seasickness any more.
293
00:17:07,440 --> 00:17:10,070
Why did the doctor have
her head in her hands?
294
00:17:10,120 --> 00:17:13,480
Did she? Oh, I think she
had a migraine coming on.
295
00:17:14,720 --> 00:17:16,550
Can children get migraines?
296
00:17:16,600 --> 00:17:17,790
She wasn't that young.
297
00:17:17,840 --> 00:17:19,750
She didn't know who Uri Geller was.
298
00:17:19,800 --> 00:17:21,470
Why were you talking about Uri Geller?
299
00:17:21,520 --> 00:17:25,150
No, I was talking about
fraudsters in general. Not her!
300
00:17:25,200 --> 00:17:28,270
I was just saying that there
must be some out there.
301
00:17:28,320 --> 00:17:31,600
But, no, yeah, I think
it's done some good.
302
00:17:34,680 --> 00:17:36,590
What's this?
303
00:17:36,640 --> 00:17:39,230
That's for being brave.
304
00:17:39,280 --> 00:17:40,800
Aw, cheers.
305
00:17:41,960 --> 00:17:44,510
Well, better get off to the scout hut.
306
00:17:44,560 --> 00:17:47,230
Do you want to stay tomorrow
night and see if it worked?
307
00:17:47,280 --> 00:17:48,510
Yeah, go on, then.
308
00:17:48,560 --> 00:17:51,230
We can get a takeaway. I'll
treat you to fish and chips.
309
00:17:51,280 --> 00:17:55,080
Thank you very much.
310
00:18:02,040 --> 00:18:08,030
Very nice! House of
Constantine, circa 224 to 330 AD.
311
00:18:08,080 --> 00:18:09,510
That's what I said.
312
00:18:09,560 --> 00:18:13,510
And this one is third
century, possibly Claudius II.
313
00:18:13,560 --> 00:18:15,070
I said that as well.
314
00:18:15,120 --> 00:18:16,550
And all this out of the same field?
315
00:18:16,600 --> 00:18:19,150
There's something good
going on down there, Terry.
316
00:18:19,200 --> 00:18:20,600
We're close, I can feel it.
317
00:18:22,440 --> 00:18:25,200
What's Russell doing? Russell?
318
00:18:27,040 --> 00:18:28,480
Russ!
319
00:18:30,200 --> 00:18:31,230
Whatcha doin'?
320
00:18:31,280 --> 00:18:32,630
I'm on my new app.
321
00:18:32,680 --> 00:18:33,990
Your what?
322
00:18:34,040 --> 00:18:37,390
It's my new app on my phone,
it's a metal detecting app.
323
00:18:37,440 --> 00:18:41,470
It's great. You can go on different
historical sites to detect.
324
00:18:41,520 --> 00:18:43,720
I'm currently on Hadrian's Wall.
325
00:18:44,760 --> 00:18:46,390
Well, now I've seen everything.
326
00:18:46,440 --> 00:18:50,280
Oh! Here we go. Good signal, 12.5.
327
00:18:58,680 --> 00:19:00,400
It's deep.
328
00:19:05,040 --> 00:19:11,320
Ah! Roman Centurion's
helmet. Good condition.
329
00:19:12,720 --> 00:19:14,280
I'm keeping it.
330
00:19:20,720 --> 00:19:24,190
So, did Andy tell you
who's been snooping around?
331
00:19:24,240 --> 00:19:25,230
Who?
332
00:19:25,280 --> 00:19:27,910
- Simon and Garfunkel.
- What, the Antiquisearchers?
333
00:19:27,960 --> 00:19:31,200
Didn't they change their
name to something ridiculous?
334
00:19:32,320 --> 00:19:34,240
The Dirt Sharks.
335
00:19:38,880 --> 00:19:43,550
Right, well, there you
go, then. It's decided.
336
00:19:43,600 --> 00:19:46,190
We are no longer the Dirt Sharks.
337
00:19:46,240 --> 00:19:48,270
What are we?
338
00:19:48,320 --> 00:19:49,630
Terra Firma.
339
00:19:49,680 --> 00:19:50,720
Yes.
340
00:19:51,720 --> 00:19:53,990
But we're spelling Terra
the proper Latin way,
341
00:19:54,040 --> 00:19:55,830
not the way you want to spell it.
342
00:19:55,880 --> 00:19:57,550
It's scarier my way.
343
00:19:57,600 --> 00:20:00,670
Right then, new name, new start.
344
00:20:00,720 --> 00:20:03,590
This year, I am determined,
will be the year
345
00:20:03,640 --> 00:20:07,350
we are finally accepted onto
a proper organised rally.
346
00:20:07,400 --> 00:20:10,270
And when we are, I want us to be prepared.
347
00:20:10,320 --> 00:20:12,990
- I want to see the Dirt Sharks...
- Terra Firma.
348
00:20:13,040 --> 00:20:18,670
I want to see Terra Firma get the
best finds in every category.
349
00:20:18,720 --> 00:20:21,440
Gavin, what are you going to find?
350
00:20:24,680 --> 00:20:26,310
James I, hammered groat.
351
00:20:26,360 --> 00:20:27,630
Is it real?
352
00:20:27,680 --> 00:20:29,910
I think so. I got it on eBay.
353
00:20:29,960 --> 00:20:31,670
How deep will it be?
354
00:20:31,720 --> 00:20:32,710
Four, five inches.
355
00:20:32,760 --> 00:20:33,910
Reading?
356
00:20:33,960 --> 00:20:35,870
53. A bit scratchy.
357
00:20:35,920 --> 00:20:38,280
Nice. Michael?
358
00:20:44,600 --> 00:20:46,310
Be realistic.
359
00:20:46,360 --> 00:20:50,510
So I said, "If that
turns out to be the case,
360
00:20:50,560 --> 00:20:55,720
"I will change my name by
deed poll to Belinda Carlisle."
361
00:21:01,240 --> 00:21:03,310
What a wonderful story!
362
00:21:03,360 --> 00:21:05,790
True as I'm sitting here now.
363
00:21:05,840 --> 00:21:09,000
That restores your faith
in humanity, doesn't it?
364
00:21:11,080 --> 00:21:12,380
Another cup of tea, Belinda?
365
00:21:15,480 --> 00:21:16,790
There she goes.
366
00:21:16,840 --> 00:21:17,950
You know...
367
00:21:18,000 --> 00:21:21,830
she has got the timing
of Ken Dodd, that one.
368
00:21:21,880 --> 00:21:23,600
I'll give you that one, Sheila.
369
00:21:25,320 --> 00:21:27,400
We have a laugh, don't we, eh?
370
00:21:42,520 --> 00:21:44,350
You idiot!
371
00:21:44,400 --> 00:21:47,070
How can you get it so wrong?
372
00:21:47,120 --> 00:21:48,550
I just thought...
373
00:21:48,600 --> 00:21:50,430
What? What?
374
00:21:50,480 --> 00:21:52,560
It doesn't matter.
375
00:21:53,800 --> 00:21:56,510
Why don't you think before
you open your mouth?
376
00:21:56,560 --> 00:21:57,600
Knobhead.
377
00:22:01,760 --> 00:22:06,240
Well, we've had a very busy week.
378
00:22:07,680 --> 00:22:11,750
After a typically infuriating encounter
with those two goons from the DMDC,
379
00:22:11,800 --> 00:22:16,710
Paul and I decided to
drop in on the landowner,
380
00:22:16,760 --> 00:22:19,510
- see if we couldn't...
- Butter him up.
381
00:22:19,560 --> 00:22:21,920
Curry favour, I was going to say.
382
00:22:24,920 --> 00:22:27,150
And the information he gave us was...
383
00:22:27,200 --> 00:22:28,190
Weapons grade.
384
00:22:28,240 --> 00:22:30,080
Can you stop interrupting, please?
385
00:22:32,080 --> 00:22:36,390
Turns out the church farm has been
acquired by a solar energy company.
386
00:22:36,440 --> 00:22:39,830
They're due to start converting
the land in just under five weeks.
387
00:22:39,880 --> 00:22:41,750
So did he give you permission?
388
00:22:41,800 --> 00:22:43,280
He didn't, no.
389
00:22:47,200 --> 00:22:52,870
But Photon Harvest Solar
Electricity did. Paul's idea.
390
00:22:52,920 --> 00:22:55,590
Cut out the middleman,
go straight to the top,
391
00:22:55,640 --> 00:22:58,030
offer them a service
they can't live without.
392
00:22:58,080 --> 00:22:59,390
What service?
393
00:22:59,440 --> 00:23:02,990
Obstruction clearance, farm
machinery, unexploded bombs.
394
00:23:03,040 --> 00:23:04,030
That was my idea.
395
00:23:04,080 --> 00:23:06,870
I just said it was your idea.
396
00:23:06,920 --> 00:23:11,240
I gave you credit about two seconds
ago, you don't have to repeat it.
397
00:23:14,520 --> 00:23:17,190
Well, it was when I
mentioned unexploded bombs,
398
00:23:17,240 --> 00:23:19,150
and what happened to
that idiot Terry Seymour
399
00:23:19,200 --> 00:23:22,830
a couple of years ago, that
their ears pricked right up.
400
00:23:22,880 --> 00:23:27,630
And the permission, ladies and gentlemen,
401
00:23:27,680 --> 00:23:29,270
- is...
- Ours.
402
00:23:29,320 --> 00:23:31,000
Oh, God!
403
00:23:42,280 --> 00:23:43,990
Are you the metal detectors?
404
00:23:44,040 --> 00:23:46,030
Are we THE metal detectors?
405
00:23:46,080 --> 00:23:48,750
Bloke I spoke to on the phone?
406
00:23:48,800 --> 00:23:49,910
No.
407
00:23:49,960 --> 00:23:51,390
Oh, right, we got some.
408
00:23:51,440 --> 00:23:52,590
Some what?
409
00:23:52,640 --> 00:23:56,110
We got some metal detectors who can
do all this, so we don't need you.
410
00:23:56,160 --> 00:23:57,670
Sorry wait, what?
411
00:23:57,720 --> 00:24:01,550
We've got five weeks until
this farm's converted.
412
00:24:01,600 --> 00:24:03,190
Five weeks till the panels go up.
413
00:24:03,240 --> 00:24:06,110
We've acquired the land, we need
someone to get rid of the obstructions.
414
00:24:06,160 --> 00:24:08,590
What, and you've got your own
detectorists to do it for you?
415
00:24:08,640 --> 00:24:11,070
They're freelance. They wrote
to us, we've employed them.
416
00:24:11,120 --> 00:24:12,310
What are they called?
417
00:24:12,360 --> 00:24:15,110
A company called... Terra Firma.
418
00:24:15,160 --> 00:24:16,510
Never heard of 'em.
419
00:24:16,560 --> 00:24:18,310
And when are they showing up?
420
00:24:18,360 --> 00:24:20,630
Well, I thought they
were going to be here,
421
00:24:20,680 --> 00:24:23,280
I was supposed to meet them.
I thought you were them.
422
00:24:30,040 --> 00:24:32,320
You are kidding me!
423
00:24:41,200 --> 00:24:42,590
Are you the metal detectors?
424
00:24:42,640 --> 00:24:47,070
Indeed we are. Terra Firma
at your service, sir.
425
00:24:47,120 --> 00:24:49,590
And I can see from our friends' faces,
426
00:24:49,640 --> 00:24:51,350
they've heard the good news.
427
00:24:51,400 --> 00:24:53,350
It's a sneaky bloody trick.
428
00:24:53,400 --> 00:24:54,790
Quite the opposite, in fact.
429
00:24:54,840 --> 00:24:57,350
We've been through all
the correct channels,
430
00:24:57,400 --> 00:25:00,630
as can be proved with this paper trail.
431
00:25:00,680 --> 00:25:02,710
We've been on this farm five years.
432
00:25:02,760 --> 00:25:05,630
Can't you all do it? I don't
care if they do it as well.
433
00:25:05,680 --> 00:25:07,430
No, no, no, no, no, no.
434
00:25:07,480 --> 00:25:11,350
You gave us the permission,
as stated in this email.
435
00:25:11,400 --> 00:25:13,830
We have the permission of the landowner.
436
00:25:13,880 --> 00:25:16,030
Overruled, actually.
437
00:25:16,080 --> 00:25:18,470
Oh, come on, there's only
four of you and 300 acres.
438
00:25:18,520 --> 00:25:20,230
Why can't you all work together?
439
00:25:20,280 --> 00:25:23,110
We gave them a chance to share
and they turned it down.
440
00:25:23,160 --> 00:25:24,750
Why should we? We got here first.
441
00:25:24,800 --> 00:25:27,110
We got here first. Why
should we share it with you?
442
00:25:27,160 --> 00:25:29,030
- You should share.
- Shut up. - You shut up.
443
00:25:29,080 --> 00:25:32,230
Jesus, it's like a school playground.
444
00:25:32,280 --> 00:25:33,870
How old are you lot?
445
00:25:33,920 --> 00:25:35,710
Look, we'll do it first
come, first served.
446
00:25:35,760 --> 00:25:38,110
Whoever gets here first gets
the choice of their field.
447
00:25:38,160 --> 00:25:39,310
Not fair.
448
00:25:39,360 --> 00:25:42,150
Oh, all right, well, you can all
sling your hooks, I don't care!
449
00:25:42,200 --> 00:25:44,110
Hang on, hang on, wait.
I can go along with that.
450
00:25:44,160 --> 00:25:46,320
First come, first served.
451
00:25:53,640 --> 00:25:55,150
OK.
452
00:25:55,200 --> 00:25:57,510
See, we don't have to behave like kids.
453
00:25:57,560 --> 00:26:00,670
Yeah, but after we've chosen the field,
454
00:26:00,720 --> 00:26:04,310
there is an invisible force
field all the way around
455
00:26:04,360 --> 00:26:06,030
and you cannot enter it.
456
00:26:06,080 --> 00:26:07,630
What if we haven't got our detectors?
457
00:26:07,680 --> 00:26:09,950
It's impenetrable --
impenetrable force field.
458
00:26:10,000 --> 00:26:12,190
Right. Now shake hands.
459
00:26:12,240 --> 00:26:13,470
No way.
460
00:26:13,520 --> 00:26:15,000
Never.
461
00:26:16,280 --> 00:26:18,790
Childish.
462
00:26:18,840 --> 00:26:21,520
I know you are. What am I?
463
00:26:26,640 --> 00:26:28,200
Huh?
464
00:27:40,080 --> 00:27:42,190
Feeling any better?
465
00:27:42,240 --> 00:27:43,720
I think so.
466
00:27:45,200 --> 00:27:47,680
Did it all come up?
467
00:27:51,200 --> 00:27:53,230
I saw some fish eating it.
468
00:27:53,280 --> 00:27:54,560
Did you?
469
00:27:55,840 --> 00:27:56,880
Yeah.
33401
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