All language subtitles for We Crashed (2020) - S1E1

Does anybody have any questions?

Parting
has long been a feature on this board.

- He's a maniac.
- Oh, for... A nutjob.

- This is humiliating.
- Those are the numbers.

Come.

We're ready to vote.

Is there a motion for Tom's presentation?

- So moved.
- Is there a second?

- Seconded.
- Properly moved and seconded.

All those in favor,
please signify by saying "aye."

Aye.

Any opposed?

The motion is passed.

- Call his office and get him down here.
- Call his office and get him down here.

Adam Neumann's office. I'm gonna
pull him out of this meeting right now.

- He's not picking up.
- Get Esther over there.

Yes, I understand it's urgent.

Yes, okay. Yes. Thank you.

He is in the country, right?

Oh.

His office says he'll be here soon.

Thank you.

Go inside the apartment.

Because this is
what the third assistant does, Esther.

I did much weirder shit when I was third.

So you see what the problem is.

Yeah. I see it.

Good. The last three didn't.

It's the feng shui. It's just... It's off.

Totally off.

- You know, you walk in, and you just feel...
- It's, like… …claustrophobic.

- Absolutely.
- So, I just wanna go up, blow it out.

Finally get some room to breathe.

First thing I thought when I walked in.
Open it up.

That's what it needs. It's just...

Rise and grind.

Rise and grind!

Yes!

Feel free to look around. I imagine you
need measurements. Et cetera, whatever.

- Mmm.
- Yes, my love.

- I'll meet you in the car. Mmm.
- Okay. You sure you're ready?

- Yes, yes, of course. Onward!
- All right.

My love, you're not wearing a shirt.

Will somebody grab me a shirt?

I have him.

- Good morning, Chris.
- Mr. Neumann.

Uh, do... Who are you?

- I'm Esther. Your third assistant.
- Esther?

Yes. I have Phil on the line.

No, no. Phil isn't good for my hangover.

He says it's urgent.

Phil is always urgent.

- -Mr. Neumann, please. -Chris.
- -Mr. Neumann, please. -Chris.

- Hi, can you take this? Can you...
- No.

Turn it up! Turn it up, Chris! Turn it up!

- Okay.
- Mmm.

Okay. Good morning!

- Good afternoon, Adam.
- Good morning!

- Nice to see you.
- Dead.

Adam, the board called
an emergency meeting.

Oh, great. You can do this next.

Do you mind going to Bonberi Mart

and picking me up a wakame Caesar
before they run out?

- Why didn't you call me?
- Adam…

…the article came out.

Fuck!

Pull it together, man! Pull it together!

Adam, your door is open.

Rivka, the board is going to kill the IPO.

We've personally taken $380 million out
against our shares.

380 million, Rivka.

- Look at me.
- 380 million.

Look at me. Look at me.

Fear is a choice.

Hi. You're precleared. Oh, okay.

Okay.

You're a supernova.

Perfect, perfect, perfect.

Oh, we're going to make
a great deal today, little man.

We're making a great deal.

- Thank you. You've rehearsed everything?
- You're welcome.

- Is he ready? Does he know his lines?
- We practiced.

- Yes.
- Okay.

Hello. Adam Neumann. Krawlers.

- We have, uh, something that's going to change your life today.
- We have, uh, something that's going to change your life today.

Onesies with kneepads for babies.

Baby. Come to me, baby.

- Come to me, baby. Baby, come.
- This is...

- Don't understand. It was doing it before.
- Sir.

- Just give me a moment.
- Sir.

Will your business scale?

The difference between a good idea
and a great idea is scalability.

This has the opportunity
to disrupt the fashion industry,

literally put your competitors
on their heels.

My sister, Adi, will now demonstrate.

A collapsible heel
for the woman on the go,

because you should never have to sacrifice
style for comfort. Right?

- Crawl, baby. Crawl, baby. Crawl to me.
- Sir.

You see? He's doing it.

Watch the knees. Watch the knees.

We have a variety of colors,

from oxblood to mauve.

We have taupe, cherry.

We have a brown, a dark brown…

Didn't want to have to do this,
but, Nicholas, we need the deal.

We have black to a, uh, chartreuse...

Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!

Nicholas, my little friend.
Please, we had a deal.

- I... Uh... That's...
- The slowest elevator in all of Manhattan.

Maybe even the entire world.

Right.

Big Friday night, huh?

- Yeah, you know it.
- Yeah.

- Thai food?
- Uh, Chinese.

- Chinese!
- Yeah, yeah.

Hey. You want to have a drink?

Hey. You want to have a drink?

Oh, well, you know,
I just... just got my food, so…

Yeah, well. Bring it. I don't care.

Stink up my apartment. I love it.

You want me to have a drink
in your apartment?

Mmm, is that so weird?

We're... We're... We're neighbors here.

Well, in New York City,
yeah, it's a little weird.

Well, I'm not from New York City.
I'm from Israel.

And there it's not weird at all.

In fact, you're in and out
of each other's apartments all day long.

Your neighbors are your best friends.

Listen. My sister, she's on her way home.

It's her and I.
She's a supermodel, by the way.

But we'd love a little company
if you want to come by, have a drink.

No pressure.

Well, maybe one just quick beer.

…avoiding eye contact.

So I proposed a competition
with my sister.

Who could meet the most neighbors
in a month?

Guess who's winning.

Huh. Where is your, uh, sister?

- Uh, she'll be here any moment.
- Uh, she'll be here any moment.

Mmm... Ooh, eesh. Shit.

I thought I had a six-pack.

Well, I have some Heineken in my fridge.
I can run upstairs.

Perfect. Perfect. Great.

Great, great, great, great, uh, perfect.

Um, do you want soy sauce?

- Uh, yeah. Sure.
- Oh, grab some while you're up there.

Oh.

Up next, Adam Neumann.

Picture this.

You just graduated.
You have your fancy Baruch degree.

You scored your first job.
So, what are you making?

The starting salary for a college graduate
in New York City is $41,000.

After taxes, $29,000.

So, where are we going to live?

The median annual rent
for a one-bedroom in the city:

$38,000.

So forget the one-bedroom.

A studio: 32,000.

A studio: 32,000.

Forget Manhattan.

Uh, you could take the PATH from Hoboken?

Or maybe the ferry from Staten Island?

Now imagine living in the city,

in a modern building
with all the amenities

for a fraction of the cost.

I'm talking about communal living.

Shared spaces, shared expenses,
shared experiences, shared memories…

Shared lives.

Welcome to Concept Living.

Please. Please. Please.

Guys, you're the VCs. Jump in.

It sounds like a dorm.

Yes, exactly. Thank you very much.

Well, I'm going to college
so I can get a job

so I can make money
so I don't have to live in a dorm.

Yeah. And who cleans the bathrooms?

- You do. You and the other residents.
- You do. You and the other residents.

It's your bathroom. It's yours.

So it's actually worse than a dorm.

I'm a little bit older
than most of you here,

so I'm going to let you in
on a little secret.

You will spend the rest of your lives

trying to recapture
what you have right now.

Every Hamptons house,
every Vegas trip, every bachelor party.

It's all to recapture this. This moment.

You will chase this feeling
for the rest of your lives.

So, you can come in now
at a valuation of five million,

or you can come in later
with everyone else at 100 million.

- Thank you very much, but I wasn't talking to you.
- Thank you very much, but I wasn't talking to you.

Mr. Silvestro.

I'm not looking for an A
in a city college business course.

No offense. I'm looking for an investment.

Your firm has invested over 300 million
in real estate-related start-ups.

And whatever
your biggest success story is,

this will 10X it.

I think if you could
bottle your confidence,

that I'd invest in.

But this one's not for me.

I'm with your classmates.
I don't want to clean a communal bathroom.

I'll elevator pitch you two more.

Uh, Krawlers.
Onesies with kneepads for babies.

Just because they can't tell you
doesn't mean they don't hurt.

And a... a... a women's shoe
with a collapsible heel

that will disrupt the fashion industry.

- I'm a serial entrepreneur.
- I'm a serial entrepreneur.

All I need is, uh, some office space
and a bit of seed funding.

What do you think?

I think you're either gonna be
a billionaire,

or you're gonna get arrested.

Thank you for your time.

Okay, well... Next up…

Adam. Hey.

I might not have, uh, five million,

but, uh, I could get you
cheap office space.

- Um…
- In my building.

- Um…
- In my building.

- In Brooklyn.
- In Brooklyn?

Jordan Parnass.

Jordan.

Jordan Parnass.
Good to see you again, my brother.

- Good to see you too.
- Good to see you...

My name's Miguel.

I work at Jordan Parnass.

We do American Apparel.

American Apparel. Beautiful clothes.

- Yeah.
- I love the, uh, tube tops. Uh...

I... I work at the architecture firm
that designs the American Apparel stores.

- Oh. Oh, the architecture firm.
- Yeah.

So y-y-you don't...
Uh, you're not American Apparel?

No. We... We spoke already. You know that.

My girlfriend.

You were hitting on her
at the birthday party.

- What?
- Lisa.

I was buy... I was the one buying shots,
remember?

- I bought a...
- Shots.

- Shots! Shots! Shots! Shots! Shots!
- Shots! Shots! Shots! Shots! Shots!

- One, two, three, four.
- One, two, three, four.

Send it in the back door.

- Miguel. Miguel M...
- McKelvey.

- That's right. Miguel McKelvey.
- Miguel McKelvey. Of course.

- -Yes. -Don't be silly. Don't be silly.
- -Yes. -Don't be silly. Don't be silly.

- Of course I remember you. I remember.
- Of course.

Now, tell me about this office space.

I can show it to you.

Okay, let's go.

- Shots! Shots! Shots! That's right.
- Shot! Shots! Shots! Yeah, I was there.

- Wait, wait, wait. Five mothers?
- Yeah.

Oh, you did a lot of breastfeeding.
No wonder you're so tall.

It was a matriarchal collective. No men.

I was raised on a commune.

- Wait, you were raised on a commune?
- Yeah.

I was raised in a kibbutz.

We're like kindred spirits, you and I.

- Wow. Wow.
- I love it.

This is it.

Yes!

Wow. This is where it begins.

- I know.
- I'm shutting up now.

Do you wanna see it?

Uh, see it?

Larry and Sergey started Google
in a garage.

Bezos started at a Starbucks.

You're gonna be the first billionaire
to start in a supply closet.

It'll make for a great story.

I don't want to be a billionaire.
I want to be a trillionaire.

Tell me the rent again.

750 a month.

- Can you swing it?
- I'll figure it out.

Have a blast. Have a blast. Have a blast.
Thank you for coming.

Maybe you should be a party planner.

- No, no, no. I'm not a party planner. I'm a serial entrepreneur.
- No, no, no. I'm not a party planner. I'm a serial entrepreneur.

You know this. Okay?

I'm only doing this
to pay for my office space.

- Excuse me. Uh...
- Thank you for coming. Thank you. Enjoy.

Excuse me. Sorry.
I'm trying to get to the exit.

I'm sorry. Excuse me.

No, no, no. There are no refunds.

- That's fine.
- Zero.

Keep the money. Buy a shirt.

- Buy a shirt?
- Yeah.

This is my sister's favorite shirt.
It's mesh.

Do you... Do you know mesh?

- We've met.
- You've met?

- Yeah.
- Well, uh, have you met a peacock?

- You ever met a peacock?
- No.

Because tonight I'm peacocking.

Ah. Well, peacocks don't have nipples.

Of course they have nipples.
Everything has nipples!

Hey, who... who is that?

I don't know.

I'm going to ask her out.

Whoa, whoa. Hey, hey.

Shalom.

I didn't, uh, catch your name.

Am I going to tell
the mesh-wearing stranger

- who just followed me onto an elevator my name?
- Who just followed me onto an elevator my name?

- No, I'm not.
- Well, I'm Adam.

Adam Neumann. This is my party.

See, we're not strangers anymore.

You're still wearing mesh.

Uh, well, uh, if I wasn't wearing mesh,
would you go on a date with me?

I don't date. Thanks.

Do you eat?

- We could have dinner.
- Bye.

You could tell me why you're not dating.

Wait. At least tell me
who brought you to the party.

Sweeping the arms forward,
sit back into chair, utkatasana.

Hands down to the blocks.
Optional, straighten your back leg.

Exhale.

Coming up.

Moving now to sukhasana. Easy pose.

Ooh.

Bring your hands to your heart.

Namaste.

Namaste.

- Lehayim.
- Lehayim.

Let's hear it for the teacher.

Come on. Come, come, come. Come.

- What a class.
- Thank you.

- What a class. I mean, whoo. I'm...
- Thank you so much.

The flow in the flowing was...
Um, it's flowy.

- That's very kind. Thank you.
- Yeah.

I'm tingling still.

Usually, I take, uh, the advanced courses,

but, uh, I thought I'd drop by
and see how the beginners were doing.

- Really?
- Yeah.

- Oh, who did you study under?
- Oh, all the top gurus.

- All of them? That's amazing.
- Mmm. Yeah.

- Yeah, but I'm between gurus now.
- Mmm.

Looking for a new one.

Oh, well, unfortunately for you,
I am not a guru. I'm a yogini.

A "yoganini"?

That's not what I said.

Well, uh, maybe you could explain
the difference to me

over a little bite to eat?

Maybe you could just Google it.

Well, to be honest, I'll be too busy
googling how to fix a ruptured groin.

Well, thank you very much
for coming to class.

Feel free to leave a donation in the bowl.

Namaste.

Hi.

Well, well, well.

You shop here too. What a small city.

You shop here?
Seventy blocks from where you live?

The meatless meatballs are...
Poof, uh, incredible.

And you came here for a single banana.

I like my produce fresh.

Thank you.

2.49.

For a banana?

Don't you want to know if it's worth 2.49?

Well, was it worth it
coming all the way up here?

Mmm, for a date with you? Absolutely.

- A drink.
- A drink.

- I love drinks.
- Uh, singular. One drink.

I love a drink.

- Don't blow it.
- Why would I blow it?

- I blew it. I'm sorry.
- You hound me for a date for two weeks,

and then you're 45 minutes late?

I know, I know, I know, I know.

You're right. You're right.
You're right. Right, I apologize.

Please. Please, let me explain.

I was closing a deal.
A very big, big deal.

I don't know if I already told you,
but, uh, I'm a serial entrepreneur.

Yes, you told everyone at the party.

- What can I get you to drink, sir?
- Uh, I'll have whatever she's having.

Here's how it's gonna go.

I'm gonna finish this glass of wine
that I spent $22 on,

and then I'm going to leave.

If you're going to storm out of here,
you'll need your energy.

So I suggest little nibble.

Oh, uh, the appetizers look
even better than the main courses.

I'm a serious vegan.

Not even a taquito?

No, not... No, I can't. I write a column
for my cousin Gwyneth's wellness blog.

Wait, Gwyneth? As in, uh… Paltrow?

She's just a person, okay?

A very pretty person.

I've almost finished my glass.

Well, uh, we... we... we should order.

Just so you know,
I'm a... I'm a... I'm a health nut.

There's nothing impure
that goes into my body.

My body, my temple.

Oh, bullshit. Bullshit.

Bullshit.

- Bullshit?
- Bullshit.

You, my friend, are full of shit.

Every word out of your mouth
since you sat down has been a lie.

You're sweating because you biked here.

Your pants are wrinkled
where you pushed them into your socks.

You're not a health nut.
You're a chain-smoker.

Your fingertips are stained,
and you reek of smoke, by the way.

You only wanna order appetizers
because you're broke.

- And lastly, you're not late because you closed a big deal.
- And lastly, you're not late because you closed a big deal.

You're late because you're an asshole.

And what about you?

What about me?

What about you? A yoga teacher?

You're going to make the world
a brighter, shinier place

by teaching a bunch of bored
Upper East Side housewives

how to smell their own buttholes?

Talk about being full of shit.

I saw how much money you made
at the end of your class.

It was a mountain of cash.

Are you talking about the donation box?

- Donation box. It's always a donation.
- The yogi takes all of that.

I'm in training,
so I get paid one dollar per student.

Like a stripper.

And I'll get the check.

Your companies are never going to succeed.

You're never going to find
enlightenment that way.

Well, at least I believe in something.

- And what is that supposed to mean?
- Baby clothes? Really?

- Do you even know about babies?
- Know what the world has a lot of? Babies.

- Know what babies always need? Clothes.
- More importantly, why do you care?

Want to get out of here?

Are you fucking kidding me?

- Ah. I thought I saw the look.
- Oh, my God.

No, no, no. Wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

I, uh, forgot my wallet.

And bring your elbows to your ribs,
lowering on an exhale. Four, three...

Adam?

What are you doing?

I'm so sorry for this interruption.

Please, um, uh, rest in child's pose.

- You can't be here.
- I have an appointment.

- Oh, my God.
- You don't fool me, mister "yoganini" man.

- What are you doing?
- You don't fool me for one minute.

Rebekah, is there a problem?

Yes, the problem is I see you.

- I see you.
- Oh, my God.

Under all the namaste, incense,
Buddha statues, you're just a bullshitter.

Well, you can't bullshit me.

I went on your website.

Eight classes a day, plus T-shirts,
plus overpriced holy water.

- You're making good money.
- You're making good money.

He's making good money. Good money.

And you're making really good money

because you call your instructors
"students," but you pay them like interns.

So here's what's going to happen.

Instead of you giving Rebekah
one dollar per student,

she's going to keep the donations
and pay you one dollar per student.

Do you understand?

Technically, you shouldn't be making any...

Or I'll stick her
in her own studio.

We'll take
every single one of your students.

They'll come because we'll pay them.

And because your customers are here
for her and not for you,

we'll take every single one
of your customers as well.

She's the one with all the light, not you.

I'm an entrepreneur,

and I live for disruption.

Thank you for the drink.

Oh, my God.

So after college, I went to LA,
and I did the acting thing.

And, you know, I just learned some things
about myself and the world.

And the end.

What did you learn?

How to win the game of life.

How to win the game of life?

- Yeah, I know. It's...
- Okay, you've got to tell me.

- You got to share this secret with...
- No, I can't. You wouldn't get it.

- I wouldn't get it?
- No, no, you wouldn't get it.

Okay, I'm going to get it.

- No, I don't think...
- Yes, I will.

- Tell me, tell me, tell me.
- Stop.

- Oh, no. Stop.
- How do you win the game of life?

- How do you win the game of life?
- Stop it!

How do you win? Huh?

- What's the secret? I need to know.
- Hmm.

- What's the secret? I need to know.
- Hmm.

- On our, uh, date…
- Mm-hmm.

…you said, um…

You said my businesses would fail.

Did you mean that?

Um…

Yes.

I think it's because…

You don't care about what you're selling.

There's no intention behind your work.

What's important to you?

Uh...

What do you care about?

Right? You have to love something
other than money.

- Of course.
- Mm-hmm.

When were you happiest?

- -Oh, that's easy. When I was a boy. -Mm-hmm.
- -Oh, that's easy. When I was a boy. -Mm-hmm.

On the kibbutz.

- You grew up on a kibbutz?
- Yeah.

I didn't realize that was still a thing.

- Wait, what was that like?
- It's a thing.

It was like, uh, summer camp in America.

Perfect. Perfect.

Make a business out of that feeling.

Do what you love.

That is how you win the game of life.

Will you marry me?

No.

Not yet.

You think I care if it's Thanksgiving?

Work through it,
you useless pieces of shit.

Just get the store open.

It's not about Thanksgiving,
it's about the supply chains. If you…

- Ah. Hey.
- Hey.

Oh. Should I come back?

- No.
- I need it open.

Hey.

How are you?

Get off your ass and get it done.

You came up with the schedule.

I hear you,
and we are on top of it.

Do you want to start a business with me?

- This is for the January opening.
- Absolutely.

Don't you want to know what it is?

Oh, yeah. Yeah, absolutely.

It's shared office space.

Everything I pitched in class
for Concept Living,

but, uh, for the workplace.

- I love it.
- You like it?

- I love it.
- You love it?

Why me?

Mmm, I need an architect
I don't have to pay.

Do you even fucking hear
what I said?

- Okay, I'm in.
- Hey, Miguel. Shit-for-brains,

are you listening to me? Are you on mute?

- I'll set the meeting with the landlord.
- You better take this call off mute…

- Okay. No. I know.
- …or I swear to God…

- I completely understand.
- You understand?

Are you even listening to me?

I've been listening this whole time.

It's the dawn of a new age.

The age of the gig economy,
of the solopreneur.

An age where each of us
is a business owner,

and the business is us.

- Like, uh, JAY-Z says...
- I know what a coworking space is.

Well, then you know that conservatively,
this is a billion-dollar idea.

Billions?

- Billions.
- Billions.

- Maybe even more.
- Easily.

You can, uh, hardly cover your rent…

…and you want me to give you
a whole floor?

Look, you run a... I'm sorry to say this...
A really dumb idea

for a children's clothing company.

- Dumb? Lots of babies in the world. It's recession-proof.
- Dumb? Lots of babies in the world. It's recession-proof.

And you don't know anything
about real estate.

I mean, I have a degree in architecture.

He has a degree in architecture.

You know what, Randall?
You don't know a thing about real estate.

And do you know how I know?

Because if you did,
you wouldn't have empty floors, Randall.

- All right, have a great day.
- No, no, no.

- We'll bring you our deck tomorrow.
- Please don't.

- We're bringing you our deck tomorrow.
- Please, don't bring me your deck.

- I promise you... No.
- No, no. It's a deck.

- It's what? Uh, 17 pages?
- Yeah.

It's mostly pictures.

- Please, don't bring me your deck.
- No, no, no.

What have you got to lose,
other than a billion-dollar opportunity?

- Tomorrow.
- Okay, time to go.

Whoo!

We need a business plan.

Yeah, I know. You told him
we'd have one by tomorrow.

Every great business story
has an all-nighter.

Okay. All right, well, then,
I guess we get some food, some drinks.

No, no, no. Not we. You.

My strength is in sales, and I sold him.

You're up. And, uh, make it 17 pages.

You're up. And, uh, make it 17 pages.

- Seventeen.
- Yeah, but you didn't close him.

Oh, yes, I did.
He just doesn't know it yet.

Fu...

Let's go! We're going to be late.

- Come on. Come on, come on, come on.
- Okay. Five minutes!

Hmm. Perfect.

- Hey, you're sweating like a pig.
- I know.

Randall, as promised, one 17-page deck.

Right here. Greendesk.

Greendesk.

So, Greendesk, uh,
is for eco-conscious clientele.

Um, we're talking about desk space.

You know, companies
with a mind towards an eco-bent.

- Eco-warriors.
- Eco-warriors.

- Focus on the future.
- Exactly.

Sharing the planet.

- I hate to admit…
- I hate to admit…

It's actually pretty impressive.

But, uh, when it comes to the build-out
and short-term leases

and unknown sub-lessees,

uh, it's a little too risky for my taste.

No, no, no. Keep it. Keep it.

We... We printed one
for each prospective investor.

It's yours. It's a souvenir.

Okay, thank you for your time.

- Okay. Let's go.
- Hold on a second.

What other investors are you talking to?

Uh, well, who's up next, mmm?

- Arker, right?
- Arker.

It was Arker and then, uh, Two Trees.

Onward. Onward.

Hol... Hold on a second there.

Let me take another look.

If you look at page six.

- Well?
- Great energy.

Great. Great energy, great energy.

We start, uh, tours tomorrow, right?

- -Tours? -Tours.
- -Tours? -Tours.

Uh, we need desks.

Miguel, we're not selling desks.

We're selling an experience.

- We?
- A lifestyle.

- A community.
- Mmm, yeah.

Okay, uh, can we at least agree
that desks would help?

No, we can't.

But, um…

A two-desk pod is basically, um, a...

- 80... 80-by-60, right?
- 80-by-60. Yeah.

Do me a favor. Lie down.

- On the ground?
- Yes, lie down.

Come, come. Lie down. Just sit here.

Uh, your head, uh... th...
Yeah. Perfect. Perfect.

Then... And Rivka. For me?

- Seriously? It's dirty.
- Yes, lie down. Please, please.

It's not too bad. It's not too bad.

- Yes. Just right next to his big head.
- I don't even know. It's filthy.

That big, big, beautiful head of his.

- Is this good? What you were imagining?
- Yeah, that's perfect.

This is amazing. Okay.

So, basically, uh,

- -a two-desk pod is a Miguel by a Rivka. -
- -a two-desk pod is a Miguel by a Rivka. -

It was a chocolate factory in the '20s.

If you inhale deeply enough…
…you can still smell the cocoa.

- So, the masking tape is the desks?
- Exactly.

Yeah.

What kind of desks?

Um, Miguel?

Uh, I'll get the catalog.

Yeah.

This is my favorite part.

We're putting in a stand-up arcade
over here.

A full bar over there.

All complimentary.

It'll be, uh, kombucha by day
and happy hour every night.

Yeah.

I don't know. I don't know.

Listen, listen.

If you're looking for an office
to punch in and out of,

this isn't for you, okay?

Just being honest.

I want you to, uh, take your two-desk pod
and turn it into an entire floor.

I want you to meet your wife here, yeah?

- Okay, I want you to find a... to find a new business partner
- Okay, I want you to find a... to find a new business partner

Over a game of beer pong

and get so wasted
you don't show up the next day till noon.

Okay? I want you to read an article
in our newsletter that gives you an idea

that just changes your life.

- Yeah.
- I want you to build your dreams,

to find yourself.

And I want you to not be afraid to fail.

That's important.

The most important.

Can I put down a deposit?

Absolutely.

Hey, Miguel, get the contract.

Okay, no butter, no cheese.
None of that, okay?

- Absolutely. Anything to drink?
- Uh…

All right, then. That's fine.

- Fantastic.
- Thank you.

Anything for you, sir?

Um, uh...

Adam, are you all right?

Give me a moment, please.

Just a moment.

- You okay? Where you going?
- Uh, yeah.

Um, I'm sorry.
Can we just have a second? Thank you.

After the crash,
market short sales, closures.

My idea works.

- A version of it, anyway.
- A version of it, anyway.

You were the judge
for our business competition at Baruch.

- Right.
- Adam. Adam Neumann.

Right. Sorry, that was a while ago.

Ah, well, you made a big mistake
not investing.

Big mistake. I... I started the company,

and, uh, we're projected to make 200,000
our first year.

- Whew. Wow.
- Yeah.

- 200,000, you said?
- 200,000. Yes, yes.

- Congrats.
- 200,000.

Nice. That's what my secretary makes.

Missing a few zeros.

Good to see you, Adam.

Enjoy your meal.

Hey.

Can we... Can we go? Can we just go?

- Are you sure?
- Yeah, just come. Please.

- Okay.
- Okay.

- What just happened back there?
- What just happened back there?

- I shouldn't have gone over there.
- Why? Who were those guys?

That doesn't matter.

- Doesn't matter.
- Adam, can you just look at me, please?

I-I-I've accomplished shit. Shit!

You're right.

- You've accomplished nothing…
- Uh…

…compared to what you are going to do.

I know. You're bigger than Greendesk.

But you have to show them.

Otherwise, they're never
gonna respect you.

You have to make them see.

See what?

See what, Rivka?

You're a supernova.

Rivka.

You're getting good at this.

154 Grand.

A block off Broadway,
walking distance to a farmer's market.

- Tons of restaurants. Tons of restaurants.
- Lots.

- It's perfect.
- Oh, you... you... you're talking Manhattan.

Look, I've got a perfectly good building
at 195 Plymouth. Forget Manhattan.

Miguel. Right?

I'm not just talking about Manhattan.

I'm talking about LA,
London, Paris, Dubai.

Okay, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Look, look, look.

At... At some point in life,

you have to ask yourself,
"How much is enough?"

So buy us out.

I see.

You weren't trying to convince him
to move into Manhattan.

Well, if he had said yes...

Yeah, but you knew he wouldn't.

Miguel, at your last job,
you made, what, uh, $15 an hour?

Eighteen.

We just made 500,000 in 20 minutes.

We just made 500,000 in 20 minutes.

Congratulations.

We've proven the concept.

Now it's impossible for them to say no.

Cheers.

- No.
- No.

- No.
- Nope.

- No.
- Actually...

- No.
- Never.

No.

No. No? That's it? Just no?

Look, guys, we are still crawling
out of the wreckage of the housing crash.

We want big-credit tenants.

You two have credit scores
like college kids.

I'm not gonna rent to you,
and, to be honest,

I don't think anyone else is either.

Go back to DUMBO.

A market you know.

Uh, we... we signed a non-compete
with our old partner.

We...
We can't go back to Brooklyn.

Well, now, that wasn't very smart.

- No, no, no. I...
- I'm sorry, sir.

- -I'm not seeing you on the calendar. -Bridget, I... Yes.
- -I'm not seeing you on the calendar. -Bridget, I... Yes.

I sent the email on Thursday.

Okay, what was your name again, sir?

- Adam. Adam Neumann.
- Okay, Adam Neumann.

We're looking for our flagship location
in Manhattan, and, uh...

I'm sorry.
We have no available appointments.

Well, is there a better time to call?

We have your info.
We'll call you to schedule an appointment.

No... Well, okay, thank you.
One last question.

Again, we have no appointments.

Well, I could come tomorrow,

- directly to the office.
- Tomorrow is all booked up.

- One last...
- Have a great day, sir.

What a day, what a day,
what a day.

Ah, people.

How was your day?

Oh, it was fine.

Uh, just fine?

Yeah, it was fine.

Fine-fine, or just fine?

Just fine.

Fine.

Hey.

I'm sorry. It's just so stupid.

Um... I just...

I used to feel really at home
at the studio,

and now, every time I walk in there,

I just smell Cup-a-Soup.

He's not a real "yoganini" anyway.

I know, but I just, like,
I feel the concentration of the salts

and the animals suffering
and the phoniness and the bullshit.

- Hey, hey.
- I just thought it was my thing.

I thought, "That's it. That's my thing.
That's your thing. You have a thing.

You're home."

- Oh. No, no, no.
- I can't. I just...

I can't be nothing again.

I just can't be nothing again.

You'll never be nothing.

Rivka, Rivka, Rivka.

I didn't want to tell you this, but
I saw him in line at Popeye's once, okay?

You're bigger than this.

You're a leader.

You're a teacher. An artist.

A phenomenal talent.

A phenomenal talent.

There are so many more things
to explore in life.

You're on a journey. And you'll find it.

Do you really think that?

No, no.

I believe it.

Get down on the floor.

Get down on the floor.

- On the floor?
- Yes.

Okay. Getting down on the floor.

Ooh, hello.

One knee.

One knee, hmm?

Yes.

Yes?

Yes.

Yes?

- Yes.
- No.

No.

- Yes.
- Let's do it.

Yes. Yes. Yes!

I manifested you.

Mmm, is that what you call that?

It's true. I did. It works.

No. Does it?

Close your eyes.

- Okay, eyes closed.
- Okay.

If you put positive vibes
out into the world…

…the universe will open doors.

- Mmm.
- Don't you dare. No.

Focus on your spiritual energy,

on emanating those vibrations.

Okay, can you feel it?

- Mmm, I feel it.
- You feel it?

Yeah.

Okay.

Adam.

- It's the universe calling.
- What?

Oh, shit.

Yevgeny Risakov.

I've got a meeting with Yevgeny Risakov.

You're a sorceress.

I've got to tell Miguel.

It was you. I didn't.

No, I don't know.

Something is going on here, but I like it.

It's not bad. It's not bad.

You should have worn a tie though.

But I have on a V-neck.

No, no. He's a schnorrer.

He's from a family of schnorrers.

First, it was parking spots.

Now we are giving him money
to update his HVAC?

You got this.

Go to Duane Reade and buy him a fan.

Let me deal with Frick and Frack.

Guys…

I've got ten minutes.

All right. Well, uh...

The thing that sets our company apart
is that we're not just a coworking space.

We're a lifestyle.

Mmm, thank you, human Ambien.

You know what? This... This... This space,
it doesn't work for us a-actually.

Doesn't work. Doesn't work.

But thank you. Thank you.

- Miguel, let's go.
- It's not?

- No, no, no.
- But thank you for your time.

Thank you so much.
We appreciate it and, um...

Why not?

Well, uh…

You only have north and east exposures,
both into other buildings.

- The windows are acrylic. The floors are a disaster.
- The windows are acrylic. The floors are a disaster.

It's like a war zone in here.

Definitely have to repour.

- Right? Repour.
- Correct, yep.

Yeah, it's a disaster.

I bet... I bet in March, it must look
like a concrete coffin, right?

From... From September to March?

And there's so much asbestos

that Miguel will have a tumor
before he leaves the building.

No. The best that we could hope for...
You agree?

The best we could hope for is, uh,
bland and functional.

Isn't bland and functional the point?

No, it's not. It's the opposite.

We're doing something different.

We're building a community.

A lifestyle.

Uh, no offense,
but no one's going to walk around

with a shirt that says
"Risakov and Associates."

- But they will with us.
- All right, all right, mouth.

How are you going to go about that?

Well, I'll tell you.

Better yet,

I'll show you.

- Please. Please come with me.
- Please. Please come with me.

This… This is what tomorrow looks like.

Let there be light.

And wide-open spaces for people to talk
and create and eat and play.

To create businesses,
friendships, memories and…

Maybe even... maybe even fall in love.

If you still can't see it,
uh, maybe you can feel it.

Have you seen these photos?

This building sucks.

It's not about the building.

It's about the man.

He's an investor. Right?

Do we need an investor?

An investor gets us the money.

The money gets us the buildings
that don't suck.

- What's the plan then? How are you getting him to invest?
- What's the plan then? How are you getting him to invest?

Adam will manifest it.

I want to be your partner.

We're not looking for a partner.
I'm sorry.

Not a partner. An investor.

You got a number in your head?

- Can't be too low.
- Mm-hmm.

And it can't be obscene.

Everyone has a number.

I want to hear that number.

- Can I... Are you gonna let me see the number?
- Can I... Are you gonna let me see the number?

Guys, is this a joke?

'Cause we can't go into this meeting
with Yevgeny Risakov saying,

"Hey, our... our... our company

that has no employees,
no sales, no buildings"...

We... We don't even have a name.

And we're saying it's worth
four and a half million dollars?

Miguel, we have hundreds of buildings.

We just haven't acquired them yet.

The valuation is just the amount
someone is willing to pay.

It's not about money. It's about worth.

It's about how you view your own value.

Adam, this is insane.

Adam. Hey, we... we can't do this.

We'll look like idiots.

$4.5 million?

- Adam. Adam, please.
- Miguel. Miguel.

You missed a zero.

Forty-five million.

Fifteen million for one-third stake.

I can't do that number.

What's chai?

Eighteen.

Eighteen is a lucky number in Hebrew.

It means you are blessing me
and my investment for a good, long life.

Add 18 cents to the end of it,
and you've got a deal.

Fifteen million and 18 cents
for a one-third stake.

- I'll have my lawyer go and get into it.
- I'll have my lawyer go and get into it.

I haven't asked you.

What's the name?

We need a name.

We do.

"We."

We.

- We, uh... We live.
- We dream.

We dream.

- We dream.
- We wor...

- Adam.
- Bruce.

I'm guessing you're not all here
to congratulate us on opening WeWork Lima.

20,000 square feet,
right in the heart of San Isidro.

Ninety-six percent rented.

Pretty good.

No, I'm guessing you're here

because your Wall Street Journal
online subscription notified you

about a new WeWork article

that, instead of touting our global reach
or our Q3 projections,

which are very good, by the way,

set out to destroy us.

We have 425 locations
in 100 cities around the world

and over 400,000 members.

So the Journal article,
it didn't upset me.

No. No.

It inspired me.

Our current valuation, $47 billion,

some people think it's… uh, ridiculous.

And, to be honest, I agree.

We're worth a trillion.

I have not even begun to realize my vision
of what this company could be.

I have zero doubt. Zero.

I have zero doubt. Zero.

But when you, uh,
call an emergency board meeting,

it's clear that some of you have doubt.

So, I want to say to all of you,

if you can't see what we're building here,
now is the moment to leave.

Because we are about to head into battle,

and if one tiny, little article
is going to shake you to your core,

I don't want you on my side.
Do you understand?

I don't need you on my side.

So, what will it be, huh?

Because we are going to IPO in two weeks.

You came here thinking
you were fighting for the IPO?

Of course.

Adam, an IPO is out of the question.

As CEO, I don't accept that.

As CEO, I don't accept that.

- Adam.
- I don't accept it.

- And furthermore…
- Adam. Adam.

…I don't believe
you have the faith in me...

Adam.

The board voted this morning.

We want you out.

Adam. Let's go.

Are we done pouting?

Good.

Call the lawyers.

Yeah. Which one?

All of them.