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1
00:00:04,630 --> 00:00:07,214
I'm just gonna attach
this lapel mic, sir.
2
00:00:10,261 --> 00:00:13,595
So, you want me to talk about
persephone odair? That's easy.
3
00:00:13,723 --> 00:00:16,265
She was a brilliant entrepreneur
who wanted to save the world.
4
00:00:16,434 --> 00:00:19,143
How I wish that was
her only shortcoming.
5
00:00:20,438 --> 00:00:24,106
My company, lifeboat, can
take an ocean of salt water
6
00:00:24,150 --> 00:00:26,650
And transform it into
clean drinking water,
7
00:00:26,819 --> 00:00:28,986
Cheaply and efficiently
with a machine
8
00:00:29,071 --> 00:00:31,822
Only the size of a can of oats.
9
00:00:31,907 --> 00:00:33,282
Oats!
10
00:00:33,409 --> 00:00:36,035
Now, the doubters call
this goal "impossible,"
11
00:00:36,162 --> 00:00:39,663
But I prefer to
say: "I'm possible."
12
00:00:46,589 --> 00:00:48,525
this story is about
a little girl who had a dream.
13
00:00:48,549 --> 00:00:50,215
But it begins with
another little girl
14
00:00:50,301 --> 00:00:51,592
Who allowed us
to use the footage
15
00:00:51,719 --> 00:00:54,011
From when she
interviewed the first little girl
16
00:00:54,138 --> 00:00:55,240
Who is no longer a little girl.
17
00:00:55,264 --> 00:00:57,890
I'm so excited
to be interviewing
18
00:00:58,059 --> 00:01:00,809
Persephone odair,
ceo of lifeboat.
19
00:01:00,895 --> 00:01:02,561
So, persephone,
20
00:01:02,730 --> 00:01:05,606
You were the most
be-badged girl scout of all time
21
00:01:05,733 --> 00:01:07,941
And then followed in
the footsteps of bill gates
22
00:01:08,027 --> 00:01:10,110
By dropping out
of harvard early.
23
00:01:10,196 --> 00:01:11,653
The earliest ever.
24
00:01:11,739 --> 00:01:14,990
Our car didn't even slow
down on freshmen move-in day.
25
00:01:17,161 --> 00:01:18,660
So inspirational.
26
00:01:18,788 --> 00:01:22,498
What was the "aha moment"
that gave you the idea
27
00:01:22,583 --> 00:01:23,583
To start lifeboat?
28
00:01:23,667 --> 00:01:24,875
Great question.
29
00:01:24,960 --> 00:01:27,544
And, lisa, great questions
are the jackhammers,
30
00:01:27,671 --> 00:01:30,255
Which demo the walls
built by distrupto-phobes
31
00:01:30,382 --> 00:01:33,300
To create the open
floorplan of innovation.
32
00:01:33,427 --> 00:01:36,011
I've always thought
that about questions.
33
00:01:36,097 --> 00:01:39,014
Lisa, my
grandfather was a world war ii sailor
34
00:01:39,100 --> 00:01:40,182
Whose ship was torpedoed.
35
00:01:40,267 --> 00:01:42,684
He was stranded
on a lifeboat, lisa,
36
00:01:42,812 --> 00:01:46,555
Surrounded by water
but not a drop to drink.
37
00:01:46,649 --> 00:01:48,190
Don't tell me he died.
38
00:01:48,275 --> 00:01:48,982
Worse.
39
00:01:49,068 --> 00:01:49,942
He gave up.
40
00:01:50,027 --> 00:01:52,069
And then he died, of quitting
41
00:01:52,196 --> 00:01:54,363
And super-duper dehydration.
42
00:01:54,532 --> 00:01:56,073
But I will never give up
43
00:01:56,200 --> 00:01:59,660
Until I've raised enough
capital to make lifeboat a reality.
44
00:01:59,745 --> 00:02:01,578
So if you
know any billionaires...
45
00:02:01,664 --> 00:02:04,540
Well, the only one in
our town is mr. Burns,
46
00:02:04,625 --> 00:02:05,749
And he's awful.
47
00:02:05,876 --> 00:02:08,252
Once, he clear-cut a forest
48
00:02:08,420 --> 00:02:10,754
Because he thought a squirrel
was looking at him funny.
49
00:02:13,801 --> 00:02:15,759
Montgomery burns.
50
00:02:15,803 --> 00:02:18,053
Interesting idea, lisa.
51
00:02:18,139 --> 00:02:19,972
No, I didn't say
it to be an idea!
52
00:02:20,099 --> 00:02:21,306
He's terrible.
53
00:02:21,433 --> 00:02:24,309
Whatever you
do, don't go to him.
54
00:02:24,395 --> 00:02:26,395
But the woman who once tried
55
00:02:26,480 --> 00:02:28,605
To clone sheryl sandberg
for a school project
56
00:02:28,691 --> 00:02:30,274
Would not be deterred.
57
00:02:33,362 --> 00:02:35,320
Welcome to orlando.
Quick heads-up.
58
00:02:35,489 --> 00:02:37,447
We may have to
cut this panel short
59
00:02:37,533 --> 00:02:39,816
Due to our third
once-in-a-million-year
60
00:02:39,910 --> 00:02:41,535
Hurricane this season.
61
00:02:41,620 --> 00:02:43,787
Put this on my reel!
62
00:02:43,906 --> 00:02:46,540
- Terrible luck.
- No fault of anyone's.
63
00:02:46,625 --> 00:02:50,127
Mr. Burns, climate change
has left the earth in peril.
64
00:02:50,254 --> 00:02:52,880
Who sent you? John
muir? Friedrich engels?
65
00:02:53,007 --> 00:02:54,548
Mike doonesbury?
66
00:02:54,633 --> 00:02:57,092
I'm getting word that this
hurricane is meeting up
67
00:02:57,178 --> 00:02:59,386
With the everglades super fire.
68
00:03:00,389 --> 00:03:03,307
Montgomery, I'm the founder
of a desalination company.
69
00:03:03,434 --> 00:03:05,976
Our world is
running out of water,
70
00:03:06,061 --> 00:03:08,470
And we need a hero to rescue us.
71
00:03:08,480 --> 00:03:11,899
And I believe that that
hero is your money.
72
00:03:14,195 --> 00:03:16,528
We sell chemicals
that can put out that fire.
73
00:03:16,655 --> 00:03:19,489
Granted, those chemicals
turn alligators into godzillas,
74
00:03:19,575 --> 00:03:22,868
But we're working on
a bomb that can fix that.
75
00:03:22,953 --> 00:03:25,537
Sorry, miss.
Desalination is a snooze.
76
00:03:25,623 --> 00:03:28,498
But I do want in on
the godzilla bomb.
77
00:03:29,501 --> 00:03:32,127
Persephone was not
shy about hounding mr. Burns,
78
00:03:32,254 --> 00:03:34,796
And he wasn't shy
about hounding her.
79
00:03:36,300 --> 00:03:38,050
Some fish just
swim with the tide.
80
00:03:38,135 --> 00:03:40,427
I'm the kind of relentless fish
81
00:03:40,554 --> 00:03:44,640
That falls down ten times
before it runs up the mountain.
82
00:03:44,767 --> 00:03:46,725
On ocean shoes.
83
00:04:00,074 --> 00:04:02,783
Fine, you've got five minutes.
84
00:04:02,868 --> 00:04:04,785
Who are these goateed wastrels?
85
00:04:04,870 --> 00:04:06,328
A documentary crew.
86
00:04:06,497 --> 00:04:10,249
Only the most paradigm-shifting
start-up ceos have them.
87
00:04:10,334 --> 00:04:14,211
Mr. Burns, I see your life
as a beautiful business opera
88
00:04:14,296 --> 00:04:17,422
And investing in lifeboat
as the climactic aria
89
00:04:17,549 --> 00:04:20,509
That will put you in the
same pantheon as getty,
90
00:04:20,636 --> 00:04:22,636
Vanderbilt, the spanx lady.
91
00:04:22,721 --> 00:04:26,515
Desalination is an expensive
and inefficient industry
92
00:04:26,600 --> 00:04:28,058
Begging to be disrupted.
93
00:04:28,185 --> 00:04:30,143
Success is a decision.
94
00:04:30,271 --> 00:04:31,937
Dare to choose it, sir.
95
00:04:32,064 --> 00:04:34,022
- Dare to.
- Of course.
96
00:04:34,149 --> 00:04:36,149
Like how I chose
to be born rich.
97
00:04:36,277 --> 00:04:39,152
Together we can
disrupt big salt water.
98
00:04:39,196 --> 00:04:41,029
You mean... The ocean?
99
00:04:41,156 --> 00:04:43,657
Exactly, or should I say...
100
00:04:43,701 --> 00:04:45,492
excellent.
101
00:04:45,577 --> 00:04:48,078
Not only am I pledging
much of my personal wealth
102
00:04:48,163 --> 00:04:51,623
To lifeboat, but I'm giving
the company cooling tower a
103
00:04:51,750 --> 00:04:53,208
To use as its headquarters.
104
00:04:53,294 --> 00:04:56,211
Cooling tower a was
mr. Burns' favorite tower.
105
00:04:56,297 --> 00:04:59,381
He always said it held so
many precious memories.
106
00:05:01,176 --> 00:05:03,677
In addition, all
workers in sector 7-g
107
00:05:03,762 --> 00:05:05,345
Are immediately fired...
108
00:05:05,431 --> 00:05:07,514
Hey, that's me! Screw you, pig!
109
00:05:07,683 --> 00:05:10,767
And are rehired at
higher tech industry salaries.
110
00:05:10,853 --> 00:05:12,519
Bless you, pig!
111
00:05:12,646 --> 00:05:13,999
Burns brought
his wealthiest friends
112
00:05:14,023 --> 00:05:15,605
Into persephone's fold.
113
00:05:15,691 --> 00:05:19,568
When I invest, I look at the
business's key fundamental:
114
00:05:19,695 --> 00:05:24,364
Am I under the delusion that
I have a shot with the ceo?
115
00:05:27,202 --> 00:05:28,680
Burns and persephone were soon
116
00:05:28,704 --> 00:05:30,746
Running the new
company side by side,
117
00:05:30,873 --> 00:05:32,414
Overseeing a start-up culture
118
00:05:32,499 --> 00:05:34,374
Where everyone
had a creative title.
119
00:05:34,460 --> 00:05:38,086
Persephone odair, founder
and status quo demolitionist.
120
00:05:38,172 --> 00:05:40,964
Montgomery burns,
chief change alchemist.
121
00:05:41,050 --> 00:05:43,216
Waylon smithers,
purposefulness warlock.
122
00:05:43,302 --> 00:05:45,719
Carl carlson,
braindump magician.
123
00:05:45,763 --> 00:05:48,013
Lenny leonard,
storytelling ninja.
124
00:05:48,057 --> 00:05:50,265
Homer simpson,
"compet-ticy" rockstar.
125
00:05:50,309 --> 00:05:51,892
Competency?
126
00:05:51,935 --> 00:05:53,143
Say it again.
127
00:05:53,187 --> 00:05:54,853
If anyone can transform burns,
128
00:05:54,980 --> 00:05:56,271
It's a visionary
like persephone.
129
00:05:56,440 --> 00:05:58,482
Like, if you work at
lifeboat, you have to use
130
00:05:58,650 --> 00:05:59,983
These metal drinking straws.
131
00:06:00,110 --> 00:06:02,235
It's so easy to clean
after every use.
132
00:06:03,739 --> 00:06:05,197
I'm just...
133
00:06:05,282 --> 00:06:06,740
Why does it have to bend?
134
00:06:21,590 --> 00:06:24,424
My fellow lifeboaters!
135
00:06:24,593 --> 00:06:28,303
I'm so excited to have
you on this journey with me.
136
00:06:28,430 --> 00:06:32,474
Imagine a world with an
endless supply of drinkable water.
137
00:06:32,601 --> 00:06:36,103
A world where every hotel
towel can be used once
138
00:06:36,230 --> 00:06:39,815
And then dropped on the floor.
139
00:06:39,900 --> 00:06:41,817
There are a lot of changes.
140
00:06:41,944 --> 00:06:43,338
Unlike when this
was a nuclear plant,
141
00:06:43,362 --> 00:06:45,404
Security's super tight now,
142
00:06:45,531 --> 00:06:48,031
And we have to
sign stringent ndas.
143
00:06:48,158 --> 00:06:50,617
And I am bad at keeping secrets.
144
00:06:50,744 --> 00:06:53,036
Like how I'm not supposed
to talk about lenny's crush
145
00:06:53,122 --> 00:06:54,871
- On his italian tutor.
- Homer.
146
00:06:57,000 --> 00:06:58,542
Lifeboat was soaring,
147
00:06:58,669 --> 00:07:00,627
But no one could've
predicted what shocking turn
148
00:07:00,754 --> 00:07:02,587
Was in store for the company.
149
00:07:02,756 --> 00:07:04,297
Um, is this one of
those documentaries
150
00:07:04,425 --> 00:07:06,466
Where I'm not supposed
to look at the camera?
151
00:07:06,552 --> 00:07:09,261
Or is it like the office,
where I always look at it
152
00:07:09,388 --> 00:07:11,638
And do a big take so
the audience knows
153
00:07:11,723 --> 00:07:13,598
When to laugh?
154
00:07:15,644 --> 00:07:18,895
In richness and wealth,
for richer and richer,
155
00:07:18,981 --> 00:07:22,983
I now pronounce
you husband and wife.
156
00:07:31,660 --> 00:07:32,826
I'm still pinching myself.
157
00:07:32,995 --> 00:07:35,871
I'm married to montgomery burns.
158
00:07:35,998 --> 00:07:37,998
Nuclear industry legend.
159
00:07:38,125 --> 00:07:40,375
Chief s'more toaster
at the bohemian grove.
160
00:07:40,502 --> 00:07:42,377
The first man
with no blood type.
161
00:07:42,504 --> 00:07:44,671
What a joy to wake
up in the morning,
162
00:07:44,756 --> 00:07:45,964
Turn my head on the pillow
163
00:07:46,049 --> 00:07:47,883
And see her bedroom
door through the glass
164
00:07:47,968 --> 00:07:50,051
Of my hyperbaric chamber.
165
00:07:50,095 --> 00:07:54,306
Soon, persephone and
burns were the new it power couple.
166
00:07:59,104 --> 00:08:01,271
And the press couldn't
get enough of this may...
167
00:08:01,398 --> 00:08:04,015
Last-minute-of-December romance.
168
00:08:04,026 --> 00:08:06,151
It's so refreshing to
see a young person
169
00:08:06,195 --> 00:08:07,652
With the world at her feet
170
00:08:07,779 --> 00:08:11,448
Who also sees the glory
that is montgomery burns.
171
00:08:22,419 --> 00:08:24,085
Now it was up to persephone
172
00:08:24,254 --> 00:08:25,837
To create a working prototype of
173
00:08:25,923 --> 00:08:28,006
Her amazing
desalination technology.
174
00:08:28,050 --> 00:08:29,925
The water in front
of you comes from
175
00:08:29,968 --> 00:08:31,843
The functional prototype of
176
00:08:31,929 --> 00:08:33,970
The lifeboat
desalination machine.
177
00:08:34,014 --> 00:08:35,639
So everyone please raise a glass
178
00:08:35,682 --> 00:08:38,725
To milestone this
history-defining moment.
179
00:08:41,522 --> 00:08:43,522
No, you can't
drink it now. No.
180
00:08:43,649 --> 00:08:46,566
Our competitors could
steal the proprietary aquatech
181
00:08:46,610 --> 00:08:47,692
In your urine.
182
00:08:49,947 --> 00:08:52,822
And just in case any of our
patented evaporated mist
183
00:08:52,866 --> 00:08:54,241
Made it into your bladders,
184
00:08:54,368 --> 00:08:57,277
We've arranged to
have you all catheterized.
185
00:09:01,250 --> 00:09:04,209
So lifeboat was just following
the tech industry playbook:
186
00:09:04,294 --> 00:09:06,169
Fake it till you make it.
187
00:09:06,255 --> 00:09:09,256
Or as I call it,
"lie-po until you ipo."
188
00:09:09,299 --> 00:09:12,676
But the employees were
already dreaming of cashing out.
189
00:09:12,761 --> 00:09:14,594
Tech salaries are the greatest.
190
00:09:14,721 --> 00:09:17,097
This week, I gave
marge 200 stock options
191
00:09:17,140 --> 00:09:18,723
To go grocery shopping.
192
00:09:18,809 --> 00:09:20,016
It didn't work at all.
193
00:09:20,143 --> 00:09:22,852
I had to put all the food
back on the shelves.
194
00:09:23,021 --> 00:09:24,832
Meanwhile, the
newly minted tech workers
195
00:09:24,856 --> 00:09:28,108
Were adapting to a much
different corporate culture.
196
00:09:28,193 --> 00:09:30,860
At the new company,
people were so secretive
197
00:09:30,988 --> 00:09:33,572
They actually moved the
post-it notes with their passwords
198
00:09:33,657 --> 00:09:35,198
Off their monitor.
199
00:09:38,236 --> 00:09:40,704
Workers were getting
fired every day.
200
00:09:40,831 --> 00:09:44,291
That tattoo is the intellectual
property of the company.
201
00:09:46,837 --> 00:09:49,838
The whole company
got so paranoid.
202
00:09:49,923 --> 00:09:51,923
Because of those ndas he signed,
203
00:09:52,009 --> 00:09:55,093
Homer couldn't even
tell me how his day was.
204
00:09:55,262 --> 00:09:57,220
I can neither confirm
nor deny I had a day.
205
00:09:57,306 --> 00:09:59,764
Well, it was strange
they wouldn't let me
206
00:09:59,808 --> 00:10:02,517
Look inside the machines,
since my title was
207
00:10:02,603 --> 00:10:06,271
Chief engineer of
inside the machine.
208
00:10:06,398 --> 00:10:08,189
And whenever a reporter came by,
209
00:10:08,317 --> 00:10:11,985
It seemed like they were
trying to cover something up.
210
00:10:12,112 --> 00:10:16,072
Well, still better than
working for zuckerberg!
211
00:10:16,158 --> 00:10:19,659
They were hiding something,
and it was really freaking me out.
212
00:10:19,703 --> 00:10:21,077
So I emailed persephone.
213
00:10:21,163 --> 00:10:23,496
And the next day, carl was gone.
214
00:10:31,498 --> 00:10:33,898
Despite the red
flags flying from this lifeboat,
215
00:10:33,967 --> 00:10:35,842
There continued to be believers.
216
00:10:35,927 --> 00:10:38,553
Persephone dominates
my vision board.
217
00:10:38,639 --> 00:10:40,555
Sure, she married mr. Burns,
218
00:10:40,641 --> 00:10:43,224
But as ceo, a woman
had all the power.
219
00:10:43,310 --> 00:10:46,394
That's what made the
internet trolls so mad.
220
00:10:46,521 --> 00:10:49,189
All the online
negativity stirred up
221
00:10:49,274 --> 00:10:52,484
The finger-tempted anger
of a different kind of troll.
222
00:10:59,201 --> 00:11:01,743
I wanted to give
my wife... wow, wife,
223
00:11:01,870 --> 00:11:03,139
Still getting used
to saying that...
224
00:11:03,163 --> 00:11:05,955
A little something
special for her birthday.
225
00:11:06,041 --> 00:11:07,624
A twitter gift card?
226
00:11:07,751 --> 00:11:09,709
No. I bought you twitter.
227
00:11:09,795 --> 00:11:12,453
The whole company.
It was a bargain.
228
00:11:12,547 --> 00:11:13,963
The previous
owner had to sell it
229
00:11:14,132 --> 00:11:15,799
After his self-driving
mars rocket
230
00:11:15,967 --> 00:11:18,343
Crashed into the
international space station.
231
00:11:20,180 --> 00:11:21,471
Mr. Burns, you deleted
232
00:11:21,598 --> 00:11:23,390
All negative tweets
about persephone.
233
00:11:23,475 --> 00:11:25,809
Is that evidence that
you're in a kind of cult
234
00:11:25,977 --> 00:11:28,103
And won't hear any
criticism of your leader?
235
00:11:28,188 --> 00:11:30,146
Yes, I am in a cult.
236
00:11:30,232 --> 00:11:32,273
It's called a marriage.
237
00:11:32,359 --> 00:11:35,235
My wife is the head of it,
and my job is to support her.
238
00:11:35,278 --> 00:11:38,154
Now, maybe you're the cult
leader in your marriage, andrew,
239
00:11:38,240 --> 00:11:40,990
But I know pilar, and I
suspect she'd disagree.
240
00:11:43,829 --> 00:11:46,413
But lifeboat was
rocked by a fresh scandal,
241
00:11:46,540 --> 00:11:48,957
When an anonymous
whistleblower bravely came forward
242
00:11:49,042 --> 00:11:50,917
With damning new information.
243
00:11:51,002 --> 00:11:52,772
My best friend carl was abducted
244
00:11:52,796 --> 00:11:54,337
Because he was
about to go public
245
00:11:54,464 --> 00:11:56,548
With a story that would
destroy this company.
246
00:11:56,633 --> 00:11:58,258
People need to know the truth.
247
00:11:58,301 --> 00:12:00,260
The lifeboat
machine doesn't work.
248
00:12:00,387 --> 00:12:03,471
The whistle was
blown and the damage was done.
249
00:12:10,480 --> 00:12:12,105
Ma'am, ma'am, the
whistleblower claims
250
00:12:12,190 --> 00:12:13,310
The only person who has seen
251
00:12:13,400 --> 00:12:15,442
The inside of your
desalination machine
252
00:12:15,485 --> 00:12:16,485
Has disappeared.
253
00:12:16,570 --> 00:12:17,570
Isn't that suspicious?
254
00:12:17,696 --> 00:12:19,362
Why do you doubt a female ceo
255
00:12:19,406 --> 00:12:20,989
But believe the
silhouette of a man
256
00:12:21,074 --> 00:12:22,282
Sitting in the dark?
257
00:12:22,451 --> 00:12:25,702
News flash! Women
have faces now.
258
00:12:25,829 --> 00:12:27,120
At this moment,
259
00:12:27,205 --> 00:12:28,663
Allegations that
its core technology
260
00:12:28,749 --> 00:12:32,083
Does not work are threatening
lifeboat's very survival.
261
00:12:32,252 --> 00:12:34,147
Is this the beginning of the end
262
00:12:34,171 --> 00:12:36,254
For this
once-promising start-up?
263
00:12:36,298 --> 00:12:37,797
And the answer is...
264
00:12:37,841 --> 00:12:39,174
Absolutely not.
265
00:12:39,217 --> 00:12:40,967
Lifeboat will save humanity
266
00:12:41,136 --> 00:12:43,511
And become the world's
most profitable company.
267
00:12:43,638 --> 00:12:46,139
Join us next time
for l ifeboat afloat,
268
00:12:46,183 --> 00:12:48,516
Persephone's total vindication.
269
00:12:48,602 --> 00:12:52,479
This documentary series
is now a burnsco production.
270
00:12:57,319 --> 00:12:58,860
Montgomery burns wasn't happy
271
00:12:58,904 --> 00:13:00,195
With the documentary
272
00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:02,008
About his wife's start-up,
so he bought the company
273
00:13:02,032 --> 00:13:03,509
That made it, but
that didn't stop others
274
00:13:03,533 --> 00:13:06,075
From telling the story,
because the business of
275
00:13:06,244 --> 00:13:09,329
Business documentaries
is big business.
276
00:13:11,374 --> 00:13:13,500
We've unearthed even more
never-before-seen footage
277
00:13:13,585 --> 00:13:15,835
Of the beatles,
including six hours
278
00:13:15,921 --> 00:13:17,712
Of them discussing
drinking water.
279
00:13:17,798 --> 00:13:21,090
The thing about water,
you can't make tea without it.
280
00:13:21,218 --> 00:13:23,176
What if you made
tea out of coffee?
281
00:13:23,261 --> 00:13:25,345
What if you made
coffee out of tea?
282
00:13:25,430 --> 00:13:27,597
Fellas, maybe we
should play some music.
283
00:13:27,641 --> 00:13:30,850
Why do they call it h2o?
284
00:13:30,977 --> 00:13:32,977
I bet no reason at all.
285
00:13:34,648 --> 00:13:37,190
Just weeks ago,
lifeboat stopped payment
286
00:13:37,275 --> 00:13:39,442
On their stadium naming rights.
287
00:13:46,326 --> 00:13:48,117
Despite the glut of
lifeboat documentaries,
288
00:13:48,245 --> 00:13:51,412
The definitive version was made
by a storyteller so compelling,
289
00:13:51,456 --> 00:13:55,166
He made 12 hours on the
national parks feel like 11.
290
00:14:11,393 --> 00:14:13,538
The mysterious
whistleblower alleged that
291
00:14:13,562 --> 00:14:16,980
Persephone's desalination
machine was fraudulent.
292
00:14:17,065 --> 00:14:19,190
The lifeboat
machine doesn't work.
293
00:14:19,276 --> 00:14:20,711
Unfortunately for him,
294
00:14:20,735 --> 00:14:23,903
Mr. Burns' legal team had
acquired the raw footage
295
00:14:24,030 --> 00:14:27,240
Of the whistleblower's
damning interview.
296
00:14:27,367 --> 00:14:29,868
The machine doesn't work.
297
00:14:29,953 --> 00:14:31,911
Hey, I ordered this sub toasted.
298
00:14:31,997 --> 00:14:33,413
This is only lightly toasted.
299
00:14:33,498 --> 00:14:35,582
Is this how
you treat a whistleblower?
300
00:14:37,168 --> 00:14:39,168
Mr. Burns
and persephone now knew
301
00:14:39,296 --> 00:14:41,796
The identity of the
man who betrayed them.
302
00:14:41,840 --> 00:14:44,966
And the hiring of lawyers
to destroy homer simpson
303
00:14:45,135 --> 00:14:48,303
Proved to be quite
the aphrodisiac.
304
00:14:51,892 --> 00:14:53,244
Lifeboat lawyers were relentless
305
00:14:53,268 --> 00:14:55,226
In trying to subpoena homer...
306
00:14:55,312 --> 00:14:58,229
And sue him for
breaking his nda.
307
00:15:04,070 --> 00:15:05,862
My dad got an anonymous message
308
00:15:05,947 --> 00:15:07,864
Saying there was
something he had to see,
309
00:15:07,949 --> 00:15:09,115
So I went with him.
310
00:15:09,200 --> 00:15:10,575
What I saw changed
311
00:15:10,702 --> 00:15:13,620
The one thing I thought
could never be changed...
312
00:15:13,747 --> 00:15:15,204
My mind.
313
00:15:21,504 --> 00:15:24,297
Carl. You
sent the message.
314
00:15:24,341 --> 00:15:27,175
You've been working
in the lab all along?
315
00:15:29,721 --> 00:15:31,262
If I didn't do their dirty work,
316
00:15:31,306 --> 00:15:33,389
They'd tell the
world my dark secret.
317
00:15:33,433 --> 00:15:35,975
I've been to 700
jimmy buffet concerts!
318
00:15:36,061 --> 00:15:37,602
I'm a parrot-head.
319
00:15:37,729 --> 00:15:40,188
"cheeseburger in paradise"!
320
00:15:40,315 --> 00:15:41,898
So, what are they making you do?
321
00:15:42,025 --> 00:15:44,567
I'm putting something
in the lifeboat machines
322
00:15:44,694 --> 00:15:46,611
Called "jab-a-tose."
323
00:15:46,696 --> 00:15:48,488
Well, if I may frink-splain.
324
00:15:48,531 --> 00:15:49,781
In 1970,
325
00:15:49,866 --> 00:15:52,825
A very popular
diet soda called jab
326
00:15:52,953 --> 00:15:56,663
Was discontinued because
of the overpowering sweetness
327
00:15:56,748 --> 00:15:58,331
Of its artificial flavor.
328
00:15:59,334 --> 00:16:03,628
Lifeboat bought up thousands
of cases of unsold jab sodas
329
00:16:03,672 --> 00:16:06,756
Because jab-a-tose was so strong
330
00:16:06,883 --> 00:16:09,717
It could completely
mask the taste of salt.
331
00:16:09,844 --> 00:16:13,096
My god. This machine
doesn't take out the salt.
332
00:16:13,181 --> 00:16:15,890
It masks it with sweetness!
333
00:16:15,976 --> 00:16:17,892
That's the jab-a-tose.
334
00:16:18,061 --> 00:16:19,978
Ocean water enters the machine,
335
00:16:20,063 --> 00:16:22,105
And when it comes
out, it tastes normal
336
00:16:22,190 --> 00:16:24,857
But still has more salt
than all the glasses
337
00:16:24,985 --> 00:16:26,109
In margaritaville.
338
00:16:26,236 --> 00:16:28,903
My god. Lifeboat
is built on a lie,
339
00:16:28,989 --> 00:16:31,114
And persephone is a fraud.
340
00:16:31,241 --> 00:16:32,949
But her merch is...
341
00:16:33,159 --> 00:16:34,409
solid.
342
00:16:34,494 --> 00:16:35,994
Action was needed,
343
00:16:36,121 --> 00:16:38,705
And island time was running out.
344
00:16:38,790 --> 00:16:40,248
The fateful demo day had arrived
345
00:16:40,333 --> 00:16:42,834
For lifeboat to finally
prove its concept
346
00:16:42,919 --> 00:16:44,752
At springfield elementary.
347
00:16:44,796 --> 00:16:47,171
The school's drinking
water had been replaced
348
00:16:47,298 --> 00:16:48,840
With lifeboat liquid...
349
00:16:48,883 --> 00:16:51,300
Jab-a-tose-infused salt water.
350
00:16:51,344 --> 00:16:54,595
Lifeboat employees
had drunk the kool-aid,
351
00:16:54,723 --> 00:16:57,473
And now it was being
served up to the children.
352
00:16:57,600 --> 00:16:58,600
Mr. Burns!
353
00:16:58,727 --> 00:17:00,059
The lifeboat water isn't safe.
354
00:17:00,145 --> 00:17:02,437
It's just super
sweetened ocean brine.
355
00:17:02,564 --> 00:17:05,398
Nonsense. My wife
is a beautiful genius,
356
00:17:05,567 --> 00:17:07,400
Who succeeds at
everything she touches.
357
00:17:07,527 --> 00:17:10,028
And everything she
says makes perfect sense.
358
00:17:10,113 --> 00:17:13,364
The wheel of tomorrow
is an aqua-circle.
359
00:17:13,533 --> 00:17:15,074
Let's make it rain.
360
00:17:15,243 --> 00:17:16,576
Buddy, buddy, buddy.
361
00:17:16,661 --> 00:17:19,704
What you're feeling towards
that lady is fresh love,
362
00:17:19,831 --> 00:17:20,872
Not married love.
363
00:17:20,957 --> 00:17:22,206
But we are married.
364
00:17:22,333 --> 00:17:25,168
Yes, but the married
love hasn't kicked in yet.
365
00:17:25,295 --> 00:17:27,962
When it does, you'll
see your spouse's flaws
366
00:17:28,048 --> 00:17:31,674
In 4k hdtv you
can never turn off.
367
00:17:31,760 --> 00:17:33,259
What are you driving at?
368
00:17:33,303 --> 00:17:36,846
I think you need to look at
your wife with marriage eyes.
369
00:17:36,973 --> 00:17:38,264
Water is the original crypto.
370
00:17:38,391 --> 00:17:41,100
Every drop is encoded on
the biological blockchain,
371
00:17:41,227 --> 00:17:44,729
And we are the aquanauts
of the potable future.
372
00:17:44,773 --> 00:17:47,148
This is wet 3.0!
373
00:17:47,192 --> 00:17:51,018
I don't understand a
thing she's ever said.
374
00:17:51,112 --> 00:17:53,112
Now you're married.
375
00:17:53,239 --> 00:17:55,406
And since you're
seeing things clearly...
376
00:17:56,701 --> 00:17:59,744
Dear. Those children
are going to drink poison.
377
00:17:59,829 --> 00:18:01,454
And the bad news is...
378
00:18:01,539 --> 00:18:02,997
I'm going to be liable.
379
00:18:03,166 --> 00:18:05,208
Liable!
380
00:18:10,673 --> 00:18:12,443
That is what would have happened
381
00:18:12,467 --> 00:18:15,384
Had homer not
turned the valve off.
382
00:18:17,806 --> 00:18:20,598
Sorry, we only put that
in there for the trailer.
383
00:18:20,725 --> 00:18:22,725
Do you know how hard it
is to get people to watch
384
00:18:22,852 --> 00:18:26,104
A documentary that's not
about a small-town murder?
385
00:18:26,189 --> 00:18:27,647
Please, honey, come clean.
386
00:18:27,732 --> 00:18:30,233
Your miracle invention
is nothing but claptrap.
387
00:18:30,276 --> 00:18:33,528
If you can just admit that,
maybe we have a chance.
388
00:18:33,613 --> 00:18:37,782
Babe, the underlying
imaginary technology still works.
389
00:18:37,867 --> 00:18:39,283
And in that moment,
390
00:18:39,327 --> 00:18:43,454
This unlikely and super
gross love affair died.
391
00:18:43,540 --> 00:18:47,583
Yes, I was besotted,
blind to her machinations.
392
00:18:47,710 --> 00:18:49,210
She cost me billions.
393
00:18:49,337 --> 00:18:51,170
It wasn't that she
was evil, I love evil.
394
00:18:51,297 --> 00:18:54,257
It's that she still
insists she's good.
395
00:18:55,718 --> 00:18:58,177
Lifeboat
had finally hit the reef,
396
00:18:58,263 --> 00:19:00,388
Drowning its investors
and employees
397
00:19:00,431 --> 00:19:03,850
In poisoned water and
counterparty risk lawsuits.
398
00:19:03,935 --> 00:19:06,435
But to this day,
persephone has refused
399
00:19:06,604 --> 00:19:08,271
To admit any failure.
400
00:19:08,314 --> 00:19:11,524
Testing showed your
de-salinator did absolutely nothing,
401
00:19:11,609 --> 00:19:14,277
Your company is
bankrupt, and in the divorce,
402
00:19:14,445 --> 00:19:17,363
Mr. Burns somehow got
your high school friends.
403
00:19:20,618 --> 00:19:22,034
What happens from here?
404
00:19:22,120 --> 00:19:23,556
Well, christiane
amanpour, as you say,
405
00:19:23,580 --> 00:19:25,663
Things have never looked
better for the company.
406
00:19:25,748 --> 00:19:26,748
I didn't say that.
407
00:19:26,875 --> 00:19:28,040
The reality is,
408
00:19:28,168 --> 00:19:30,251
You're in jail.
409
00:19:30,336 --> 00:19:32,003
Christiane, have I
ever told you about
410
00:19:32,046 --> 00:19:35,298
My grandfather's
experience on a lifeboat?
411
00:19:36,134 --> 00:19:37,383
Even that was a lie.
412
00:19:37,543 --> 00:19:39,177
Her grandfather
wasn't in the war,
413
00:19:39,262 --> 00:19:40,553
And he didn't die on a lifeboat.
414
00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:43,890
He's a cpa whose hobby
is fixing british spellings
415
00:19:44,017 --> 00:19:45,600
On wikipedia.
416
00:19:51,107 --> 00:19:52,440
Not only did I miss out
417
00:19:52,567 --> 00:19:54,525
On once-in-a-lifetime
start-up riches,
418
00:19:54,611 --> 00:19:56,944
But I lost the most
amazing woman I ever met.
419
00:19:56,988 --> 00:20:00,239
I think, in a few more months
she might've even slept with me.
420
00:20:00,366 --> 00:20:01,657
It's great to meet you in person
421
00:20:01,784 --> 00:20:04,827
After seeing so much footage
of you in our documentary
422
00:20:04,913 --> 00:20:07,496
The man who sold
horse meat sandwiches.
423
00:20:09,667 --> 00:20:10,708
Anything else to add?
424
00:20:10,877 --> 00:20:11,751
Just this.
425
00:20:11,878 --> 00:20:13,211
Don't feel sorry for me.
426
00:20:13,296 --> 00:20:15,254
Time to rebuild and reconquer.
427
00:20:15,381 --> 00:20:17,882
If I know one
thing about myself,
428
00:20:18,009 --> 00:20:21,594
Montgomery burns
always bounces back.
429
00:20:48,081 --> 00:20:51,332
We also have over 90 hours
of them talking about umbrellas.
430
00:20:51,334 --> 00:20:52,875
Maybe that could be
a documentary, too.
431
00:20:53,628 --> 00:20:56,128
I once brought an
umbrella into the shower.
432
00:20:56,214 --> 00:20:58,214
- How did you get clean?
- I didn't,
433
00:20:58,299 --> 00:21:01,384
But at least I didn't have
to take off my clothes.
434
00:21:01,552 --> 00:21:04,720
As soon as I open my
umbrella, it stops raining.
435
00:21:04,764 --> 00:21:06,389
You need a sunroof on it.
436
00:21:06,516 --> 00:21:09,517
What about a giant umbrella
you keep in the trunk?
437
00:21:09,644 --> 00:21:13,479
Sounds like you're talking
about an "umbrellaphant."
438
00:21:13,523 --> 00:21:15,273
Can we get back to work?
439
00:21:15,316 --> 00:21:17,316
Wait. I like the sound of that.
440
00:21:17,402 --> 00:21:18,402
Get back.
441
00:21:18,486 --> 00:21:20,528
I saw an umbrellaphant
at the circus.
442
00:21:20,655 --> 00:21:22,488
He was working for peanuts.
443
00:21:31,249 --> 00:21:32,498
Shh!
444
00:21:32,522 --> 00:21:34,522
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