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1
00:00:04,238 --> 00:00:06,607
Miller: Morning, students!
Please settle.
2
00:00:06,640 --> 00:00:10,478
"What is this..." A-S --
"...assembly about?"
3
00:00:10,511 --> 00:00:12,546
I don't know.
Ray, what is this about?
4
00:00:12,580 --> 00:00:13,581
Shh!
5
00:00:13,614 --> 00:00:15,149
It's a celebration
of the Mexican
6
00:00:15,183 --> 00:00:16,917
Día de Los Muertos holiday.
7
00:00:16,950 --> 00:00:18,852
What? [ Laughs ]
Come on, man.
8
00:00:18,886 --> 00:00:20,321
That was just Dylan
messing with you.
9
00:00:22,323 --> 00:00:24,558
[ Laughter ]
You're kidding.
10
00:00:24,592 --> 00:00:26,694
Sorry, Ray.
It's Homecoming Week.
11
00:00:26,727 --> 00:00:28,196
Prank season, baby.
12
00:00:28,229 --> 00:00:29,963
[ Laughter ]
Miller: Can I have
your attention, please?
13
00:00:29,997 --> 00:00:33,867
I-It's a very exciting time.
It's Homecoming Week.
14
00:00:33,901 --> 00:00:37,438
And Lafayette is welcoming
our new students!
15
00:00:37,471 --> 00:00:40,040
Now, who better to welcome them
to Lafayette
16
00:00:40,074 --> 00:00:42,276
than Lafayette himself?
17
00:00:42,310 --> 00:00:43,411
What?
18
00:00:43,444 --> 00:00:45,179
From the hit musical "Hamilton"?
19
00:00:45,213 --> 00:00:46,480
Student: Don't rap!
20
00:00:46,514 --> 00:00:49,283
[ Hip-hop music plays ]
21
00:00:49,317 --> 00:00:51,152
Throw your hands
in the air!
22
00:00:51,185 --> 00:00:52,553
[ Feedback ]
23
00:00:52,586 --> 00:00:55,189
[ Rapping ] * Je suis Lafayette,
and I'm here to say *
24
00:00:55,223 --> 00:00:57,591
* My school is so inclusive,
and JJ paved the way *
25
00:00:57,625 --> 00:00:59,893
* We've got some new students,
or should I say friends *
26
00:00:59,927 --> 00:01:02,163
* I'm 'bout to introduce them,
so whip out them pens *
27
00:01:02,196 --> 00:01:04,898
* We have Cody who has autism,
and Nora with CP *
28
00:01:04,932 --> 00:01:07,435
* Davey's blind, and Bella has
muscular dystrophy *
29
00:01:07,468 --> 00:01:09,270
I say "muscular."
You say "dystrophy."
30
00:01:09,303 --> 00:01:12,140
Dystrophy! Yes, girl!
Look at her go!
31
00:01:12,173 --> 00:01:14,408
She got moves, man.
Unh!
32
00:01:14,442 --> 00:01:17,511
-- Captions by VITAC --
33
00:01:18,446 --> 00:01:21,014
[ School bell rings ]
34
00:01:21,048 --> 00:01:25,819
"Stacey, your shirt has
a stain on it."
35
00:01:25,853 --> 00:01:28,622
[ Laughing ] Oh!
Every time!
36
00:01:28,656 --> 00:01:30,891
I'm gonna get you
one of these days, DiMeo.
37
00:01:31,859 --> 00:01:33,194
Dang, that was smooth.
38
00:01:33,227 --> 00:01:35,963
You got an extra laser
I can borrow this weekend?
39
00:01:35,996 --> 00:01:38,432
Coming through.
Excuse me.
40
00:01:38,466 --> 00:01:45,038
**
41
00:01:45,072 --> 00:01:47,475
Seriously? You're just gonna
leave an aide hanging?
42
00:01:47,508 --> 00:01:49,343
Okay.
Oh, my God.
43
00:01:49,377 --> 00:01:52,413
You and Nora are so cute
together.
44
00:01:52,446 --> 00:01:54,648
"The girl who just
passed me?"
45
00:01:54,682 --> 00:01:57,351
Um, we could all feel
the electricity.
46
00:01:57,385 --> 00:01:58,719
Something to think about.
47
00:02:00,421 --> 00:02:02,590
So it begins.
48
00:02:02,623 --> 00:02:03,991
They're shipping you.
49
00:02:04,925 --> 00:02:06,794
When people are dying to get
a couple together,
50
00:02:06,827 --> 00:02:08,762
like Khaleesi and Jon Snow
51
00:02:08,796 --> 00:02:10,698
or Mulder and Scully.
52
00:02:10,731 --> 00:02:12,333
"But why her?"
53
00:02:12,366 --> 00:02:14,034
Because you both got CP.
54
00:02:14,067 --> 00:02:15,803
It's like when people always try
to get me to date
55
00:02:15,836 --> 00:02:17,104
their only black friend.
56
00:02:17,137 --> 00:02:19,373
"That's...stupid."
57
00:02:19,407 --> 00:02:22,876
That's shipping for you --
horny profiling.
58
00:02:22,910 --> 00:02:26,814
**
59
00:02:26,847 --> 00:02:28,882
Oi! Is Ray in there
with his girlfriend?
60
00:02:28,916 --> 00:02:29,883
And what does
that sign mean?
61
00:02:29,917 --> 00:02:31,219
I think it means
what it says --
62
00:02:31,252 --> 00:02:32,953
"I don't respect you
or your rules,
63
00:02:32,986 --> 00:02:35,256
and I want to make you
a grandmother."
64
00:02:36,724 --> 00:02:38,892
[ Inhales deeply ]
Cover yourselves!
65
00:02:38,926 --> 00:02:41,529
[ Door closes ]
I will not
have my children's room
66
00:02:41,562 --> 00:02:43,231
turned into a den
of iniquity.
67
00:02:43,264 --> 00:02:45,499
Mom, we're talking about
our 401(k)s.
68
00:02:45,533 --> 00:02:48,802
Oh, spare me the cute names for
your "Eyes Wide Shut" depravity!
69
00:02:48,836 --> 00:02:50,771
Wait -- Oh.
70
00:02:50,804 --> 00:02:53,674
Wait. Do you mean like a 401(k)
like the -- the money thingy?
71
00:02:53,707 --> 00:02:56,510
Oh, my God. This skin.
72
00:02:56,544 --> 00:02:58,145
We realized that even if
73
00:02:58,178 --> 00:03:00,348
we max out our retirement
contributions --
74
00:03:00,381 --> 00:03:01,649
Which you know we will.
75
00:03:01,682 --> 00:03:03,951
We'll still end up crawling
into our golden years
76
00:03:03,984 --> 00:03:06,086
with, what, 165 grand?
77
00:03:06,119 --> 00:03:08,322
What's that gonna buy us
in 2067?
78
00:03:08,356 --> 00:03:11,459
A semi-private room in
some bad neighborhood on Mars?
79
00:03:11,492 --> 00:03:13,261
Bloody hell.
Is this why you needed privacy?
80
00:03:13,294 --> 00:03:14,762
Yeah, why else
would we need it?
81
00:03:14,795 --> 00:03:16,664
Oh, yeah, no, why else?
Why else?
82
00:03:16,697 --> 00:03:18,532
Gosh, I don't know.
83
00:03:18,566 --> 00:03:19,867
**
84
00:03:19,900 --> 00:03:22,503
[ Laughing ] You okay?
Oh, my God.
85
00:03:22,536 --> 00:03:24,505
I'm so glad we're not like
Ray and Taylor.
86
00:03:24,538 --> 00:03:26,407
I'm with you on Ray,
but Taylor?
87
00:03:26,440 --> 00:03:28,309
That skin!
I know.
88
00:03:28,342 --> 00:03:29,910
But they talk
and they talk,
89
00:03:29,943 --> 00:03:31,612
and they worry about
the future --
90
00:03:31,645 --> 00:03:33,681
I mean, things you and I
haven't even thought about yet.
91
00:03:33,714 --> 00:03:36,016
They're getting
a 401(k) thingy.
92
00:03:36,049 --> 00:03:37,418
We have a 401(k).
93
00:03:37,451 --> 00:03:38,586
Oh, well,
that's a relief.
94
00:03:38,619 --> 00:03:40,053
Is it? Oh.
I'll get one.
95
00:03:40,087 --> 00:03:41,455
But I love
the way we live.
96
00:03:41,489 --> 00:03:43,424
We don't
overanalyze things.
97
00:03:43,457 --> 00:03:45,426
We don't plan things
to death.
98
00:03:45,459 --> 00:03:47,695
These aren't bills,
they're a fan.
99
00:03:47,728 --> 00:03:50,030
That's not a fan,
it's broken.
100
00:03:50,063 --> 00:03:52,766
But we sent Ray so far
in the other direction.
101
00:03:52,800 --> 00:03:55,569
I think
we made him weird.
102
00:03:55,603 --> 00:03:59,072
I'm a big
nature-over-nurture guy.
103
00:03:59,106 --> 00:04:00,408
It makes parenting
a lot easier.
104
00:04:00,441 --> 00:04:03,511
**
105
00:04:03,544 --> 00:04:05,346
Hi, everyone.
Dylan DiMeo.
106
00:04:05,379 --> 00:04:06,847
I'm usually not much
of a joiner,
107
00:04:06,880 --> 00:04:08,616
but I'm so pumped
for this meeting.
108
00:04:08,649 --> 00:04:10,384
I've been studying up
on our school's pranks
109
00:04:10,418 --> 00:04:11,385
through the ages.
110
00:04:11,419 --> 00:04:12,420
These yearbooks?
111
00:04:12,453 --> 00:04:13,921
Don't let the word "book"
scare you --
112
00:04:13,954 --> 00:04:14,955
They're money!
113
00:04:14,988 --> 00:04:16,690
Dylan, do you know
why we're here?
114
00:04:16,724 --> 00:04:18,191
Like the sign said --
115
00:04:18,225 --> 00:04:19,593
"Student Council
Prank Meeting."
116
00:04:19,627 --> 00:04:21,795
Right, to discuss
our school-wide
117
00:04:21,829 --> 00:04:24,064
"No pranks" initiative
we've instituted.
118
00:04:24,097 --> 00:04:25,766
The council voted
unanimously,
119
00:04:25,799 --> 00:04:28,769
and the student body agrees --
no more pranks.
120
00:04:28,802 --> 00:04:30,338
The time has come
to move past
121
00:04:30,371 --> 00:04:32,473
micro-aggressions
masquerading as tradition.
122
00:04:32,506 --> 00:04:35,776
But I love micro-aggressions
masquerading as tradition!
123
00:04:35,809 --> 00:04:38,879
Check out this crew
from the Class of '67 --
124
00:04:38,912 --> 00:04:40,881
The Prankenstein Monsters?
125
00:04:40,914 --> 00:04:43,116
They waterproofed
the principal's office
126
00:04:43,150 --> 00:04:44,885
and turned it
into a fishbowl.
127
00:04:44,918 --> 00:04:46,253
A fishbowl!
128
00:04:46,286 --> 00:04:48,589
What happened to the fish
afterwards?
129
00:04:48,622 --> 00:04:50,257
They stayed fish!
130
00:04:50,290 --> 00:04:52,360
Look, you guys,
we're kids.
131
00:04:52,393 --> 00:04:55,195
We have our whole lives
to be cautious and sensitive.
132
00:04:55,228 --> 00:04:57,698
That's all adulthood is --
worrying about fish.
133
00:04:57,731 --> 00:04:59,867
Let's be young
and fun together.
134
00:04:59,900 --> 00:05:01,635
Who's with me?
135
00:05:04,738 --> 00:05:05,639
[ Scoffs ]
136
00:05:05,673 --> 00:05:08,509
**
137
00:05:08,542 --> 00:05:12,279
I am so not voting
for any of you next year.
138
00:05:12,312 --> 00:05:15,783
JJ, we have the most
genius idea.
139
00:05:15,816 --> 00:05:17,485
You should date Nora.
140
00:05:17,518 --> 00:05:18,886
[ Laughter ]
141
00:05:18,919 --> 00:05:22,089
[ Sighs ]
142
00:05:22,122 --> 00:05:24,992
You know who you should date?
Nora.
143
00:05:25,025 --> 00:05:26,394
I feel like
this could've waited.
144
00:05:26,427 --> 00:05:28,962
**
145
00:05:28,996 --> 00:05:30,531
Want to cut
in front of me?
146
00:05:33,266 --> 00:05:34,402
You're JJ.
147
00:05:34,435 --> 00:05:36,470
"And you're Nora."
148
00:05:36,504 --> 00:05:37,771
And together we're...
149
00:05:37,805 --> 00:05:39,607
Jora!
[ Cheers and applause ]
150
00:05:39,640 --> 00:05:40,974
It's offensive.
151
00:05:41,008 --> 00:05:43,444
Even my silent goon aide thinks
we should be together.
152
00:05:45,245 --> 00:05:49,149
"How long can this..."
S-H-- "...shipping go on?"
153
00:05:49,182 --> 00:05:50,484
Shippers never give up.
154
00:05:50,518 --> 00:05:52,319
Fighting it only makes them
ship harder.
155
00:05:52,352 --> 00:05:54,121
Why don't we give them
what they want, then?
156
00:05:54,154 --> 00:05:55,689
Let's date.
157
00:05:55,723 --> 00:05:57,858
"Nora, I'm flattered,
but..."
158
00:05:57,891 --> 00:06:00,193
I'll finish the thought.
You seem mean.
159
00:06:00,227 --> 00:06:03,096
Not a real relationship.
A fake one.
160
00:06:03,130 --> 00:06:04,364
Give the babies
their bottles,
161
00:06:04,398 --> 00:06:05,866
then break up
and get on with our lives.
162
00:06:05,899 --> 00:06:07,034
Huh.
163
00:06:07,067 --> 00:06:08,969
Y-You know what I kind of like
about that plan?
164
00:06:09,002 --> 00:06:11,371
You in a relationship
makes other girls
165
00:06:11,405 --> 00:06:12,840
see you as dateable.
166
00:06:15,042 --> 00:06:18,045
"I guess it's Jora time."
167
00:06:18,078 --> 00:06:20,648
It's happening!
168
00:06:20,681 --> 00:06:22,315
**
169
00:06:22,349 --> 00:06:23,884
Ray, I need your help.
170
00:06:23,917 --> 00:06:25,553
The kids at school stink.
171
00:06:25,586 --> 00:06:26,887
You and I
are gonna pull off
172
00:06:26,920 --> 00:06:29,823
a giant brother-sister
homecoming prank.
173
00:06:29,857 --> 00:06:31,959
Dylan, we're trying to plan
a future here.
174
00:06:31,992 --> 00:06:33,994
We don't have time
for micro-aggressions
175
00:06:34,027 --> 00:06:35,729
masquerading as tradition.
176
00:06:35,763 --> 00:06:36,730
[ Gasps ]
177
00:06:36,764 --> 00:06:37,931
You.
178
00:06:37,965 --> 00:06:39,132
You did this.
179
00:06:39,166 --> 00:06:40,668
You're welcome to use
the suggestion box
180
00:06:40,701 --> 00:06:41,835
just as much as I am.
181
00:06:41,869 --> 00:06:43,170
[ Grunts ]
182
00:06:43,203 --> 00:06:44,638
Okay, back to reality.
183
00:06:44,672 --> 00:06:45,906
In 2040,
184
00:06:45,939 --> 00:06:47,608
we'll move to Scottsdale
because of the...
185
00:06:47,641 --> 00:06:50,744
Both: Low income tax
and solar-based energy grid.
186
00:06:50,778 --> 00:06:52,179
But we'll need a house
that's big enough
187
00:06:52,212 --> 00:06:53,714
for us, our kids,
188
00:06:53,747 --> 00:06:55,849
and maybe both of our
special-needs brothers.
189
00:06:55,883 --> 00:06:59,052
I'm Logan's only sibling,
so can JJ live with Dylan?
190
00:06:59,086 --> 00:07:02,723
She'd be open to that,
but would her husband?
191
00:07:02,756 --> 00:07:05,726
She'd need to marry someone who
loves JJ and wants him around.
192
00:07:05,759 --> 00:07:08,028
Hey, y'all hear this mess
about Lafayette
193
00:07:08,061 --> 00:07:09,763
banning homecoming pranks?
194
00:07:09,797 --> 00:07:10,864
The hell!
195
00:07:10,898 --> 00:07:12,099
[ Ding! ]
196
00:07:12,132 --> 00:07:18,872
**
197
00:07:18,906 --> 00:07:21,408
Root beer --
You both like root beer.
198
00:07:21,441 --> 00:07:22,676
What is this?
What are you doing?
199
00:07:22,710 --> 00:07:24,044
We're not doing
anything.
200
00:07:24,077 --> 00:07:25,846
But when something's
meant to be,
201
00:07:25,879 --> 00:07:27,380
it just happens itself.
202
00:07:27,414 --> 00:07:28,448
What's with
the weird looks?
203
00:07:28,482 --> 00:07:29,850
Can I just get back
to my sandwich?
204
00:07:29,883 --> 00:07:32,553
You know who loves
sandwiches?
205
00:07:32,586 --> 00:07:35,055
This eligible
bachelorette.
206
00:07:35,088 --> 00:07:37,290
Did you see that look?
Chills.
207
00:07:37,324 --> 00:07:38,325
Wait a second!
208
00:07:38,358 --> 00:07:39,860
Are you trying
to ship me and Dylan?
209
00:07:39,893 --> 00:07:41,161
Oh, gross!
210
00:07:41,194 --> 00:07:44,632
Not until you're 18!
Just promise yourself to him.
211
00:07:44,665 --> 00:07:46,299
Ray, what are you doing?
What have we told you
212
00:07:46,333 --> 00:07:48,468
about trying to marry off
your sister, Ray?
213
00:07:48,502 --> 00:07:49,937
Somebody rich!
214
00:07:49,970 --> 00:07:51,572
You guys ruin
everything!
215
00:07:51,605 --> 00:07:52,773
If they don't
get together,
216
00:07:52,806 --> 00:07:54,708
it is bye-bye Scottsdale
for Taylor and me.
217
00:07:54,742 --> 00:07:55,643
We're doomed!
218
00:07:55,676 --> 00:07:57,144
Ray, pull yourself
together!
219
00:07:57,177 --> 00:07:59,212
Ooh! May I do that again?
It was very satisfying.
220
00:07:59,246 --> 00:08:02,249
Sorry!
Darling, you are weird.
221
00:08:02,282 --> 00:08:05,285
And, Taylor, you're far too
pretty for this nonsense.
222
00:08:05,318 --> 00:08:06,720
Your father and I
are to blame.
223
00:08:06,754 --> 00:08:08,421
We broke you,
and we're going to fix you.
224
00:08:08,455 --> 00:08:09,690
-How?
-Yeah, how?
225
00:08:09,723 --> 00:08:11,725
We're gonna teach you to let go,
stop thinking so much.
226
00:08:11,759 --> 00:08:13,627
Let's take them
on a double date tomorrow.
That sounds fun.
227
00:08:13,661 --> 00:08:15,563
We hav been looking
for couple friends.
228
00:08:15,596 --> 00:08:16,897
So weird.
229
00:08:21,268 --> 00:08:24,705
* I've got a crush on you
230
00:08:24,738 --> 00:08:28,308
* I hope you love me, too
231
00:08:28,341 --> 00:08:31,178
* I've got a crush on you
232
00:08:31,211 --> 00:08:35,348
* With a love that is so true
233
00:08:35,382 --> 00:08:39,419
* I know we could share
234
00:08:39,452 --> 00:08:42,890
* Our love's beyond compare
235
00:08:42,923 --> 00:08:45,826
* It would fill my heart
with joy *
236
00:08:45,859 --> 00:08:48,261
* Just be my loverboy
237
00:08:48,295 --> 00:08:49,763
* One more time
238
00:08:49,797 --> 00:08:51,231
What is your story,
man?
239
00:08:51,264 --> 00:08:54,434
* Oh, yeah
240
00:08:54,467 --> 00:08:56,670
Dylan?
What are you doing?
241
00:08:56,704 --> 00:08:58,138
Is this part of a prank?
242
00:08:58,171 --> 00:08:59,039
Nope.
243
00:08:59,072 --> 00:09:00,641
I'm off the whole
prank thing.
244
00:09:00,674 --> 00:09:01,909
So I figured
I'd try this.
245
00:09:01,942 --> 00:09:03,443
I just wanted to be
a part of something --
246
00:09:03,476 --> 00:09:05,078
check.
247
00:09:05,112 --> 00:09:07,247
And have some fun --
ch--
248
00:09:07,280 --> 00:09:08,348
[ Sighs ] I'm sorry.
249
00:09:08,381 --> 00:09:10,283
I can't in good conscience
say "check."
250
00:09:10,317 --> 00:09:13,220
Well, I'm glad you're here.
Take these.
251
00:09:13,253 --> 00:09:15,388
Go spruce up
Dr. Miller's office.
252
00:09:18,726 --> 00:09:22,963
**
253
00:09:22,996 --> 00:09:24,898
Dylan?
Are you okay?
254
00:09:24,932 --> 00:09:27,701
I was born
at the wrong time.
255
00:09:27,735 --> 00:09:31,038
You should be fish.
256
00:09:31,071 --> 00:09:33,206
You should all be fish!
257
00:09:33,240 --> 00:09:38,946
**
258
00:09:40,413 --> 00:09:43,083
I've seen people do this
on TV,
259
00:09:43,116 --> 00:09:44,384
but I'll be honest --
260
00:09:44,417 --> 00:09:46,119
I do not know
what I'm looking for.
261
00:09:46,153 --> 00:09:48,856
Well, if you see the last
20 minutes of my life,
262
00:09:48,889 --> 00:09:50,390
can I have it back?
263
00:09:50,423 --> 00:09:53,393
Darling, just hit the ball.
Don't overthink it.
264
00:09:53,426 --> 00:09:54,695
Well, I can help you
not think.
265
00:09:54,728 --> 00:09:55,763
Oh, good.
266
00:09:55,796 --> 00:09:57,330
I downloaded an app
that determines
267
00:09:57,364 --> 00:09:58,832
the best angle
for putting.
268
00:09:58,866 --> 00:10:00,600
Oh, no.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
269
00:10:00,634 --> 00:10:02,670
Just turn your brain off,
darling, and swing at it.
270
00:10:02,703 --> 00:10:04,037
Jimmy, go on --
show him.
271
00:10:06,640 --> 00:10:07,540
[ Thud ]
Man: Ow!
272
00:10:07,574 --> 00:10:09,109
Ooh.
Yeah, no, just like that,
273
00:10:09,142 --> 00:10:10,210
but don't hit the fat guy.
274
00:10:10,243 --> 00:10:11,712
He nailed him!
275
00:10:11,745 --> 00:10:13,346
What if he sues?
276
00:10:13,380 --> 00:10:14,815
It'll affect
your family's credit.
277
00:10:14,848 --> 00:10:15,849
Oh, no!
278
00:10:15,883 --> 00:10:17,617
What would we do
if our credit was bad?
279
00:10:17,651 --> 00:10:19,486
Maybe they'll take Ray's
college fund, as well.
280
00:10:19,519 --> 00:10:21,354
You're the reason
I'm like this!
281
00:10:21,388 --> 00:10:23,256
**
282
00:10:23,290 --> 00:10:25,859
And a little
red flair here.
283
00:10:25,893 --> 00:10:28,662
[ Chuckles ]
284
00:10:28,696 --> 00:10:30,698
"Wow, Nora.
285
00:10:30,731 --> 00:10:34,434
You're as good
at painting homecoming floats
286
00:10:34,467 --> 00:10:36,837
as you are at kissing."
287
00:10:38,438 --> 00:10:40,407
I have amazing news,
everyone.
288
00:10:40,440 --> 00:10:42,142
JJ and Nora
have been nominated
289
00:10:42,175 --> 00:10:44,177
for Homecoming King
and Queen!
290
00:10:44,211 --> 00:10:44,978
[ Cheers and applause ]
291
00:10:45,012 --> 00:10:46,379
Whoo-hoo!
292
00:10:46,413 --> 00:10:48,782
Do the Homecoming King and Queen
get to give a speech?
293
00:10:48,816 --> 00:10:50,550
Great, then we can
get up there
294
00:10:50,583 --> 00:10:53,486
and tell everybody
how stupid they've been.
295
00:10:53,520 --> 00:10:55,322
"I know these people.
296
00:10:55,355 --> 00:10:57,925
I don't want
to call anybody stupid."
297
00:10:57,958 --> 00:10:59,727
Sometimes you have to hit people
over the head
298
00:10:59,760 --> 00:11:01,461
to educate them.
299
00:11:01,494 --> 00:11:04,397
"I'm not here
to educate anybody.
300
00:11:04,431 --> 00:11:07,267
All I want is
to meet some girls
301
00:11:07,300 --> 00:11:09,069
and eat some candy."
302
00:11:09,102 --> 00:11:11,772
If you're not gonna educate
them, who will?
303
00:11:11,805 --> 00:11:14,174
"I guess you, alone.
304
00:11:14,207 --> 00:11:16,476
It's been real.
305
00:11:16,509 --> 00:11:19,412
Well..." F-A --
"...fake real."
306
00:11:19,446 --> 00:11:22,549
**
307
00:11:22,582 --> 00:11:23,917
I'm finishing.
308
00:11:23,951 --> 00:11:26,253
It's not the float's fault
you can't hang on to a man.
309
00:11:26,286 --> 00:11:27,721
Beautiful.
310
00:11:27,755 --> 00:11:30,090
Man: ...the second time!
311
00:11:30,123 --> 00:11:31,658
[ Laughter ]
312
00:11:31,691 --> 00:11:34,694
Whoa.
Are you Cherry Bomb Dom?
313
00:11:34,728 --> 00:11:37,130
Been a long time since anyone
called me that.
314
00:11:37,164 --> 00:11:38,832
You guys were
the notorious pranksters --
315
00:11:38,866 --> 00:11:41,068
The Prankenstein Monsters!
316
00:11:41,101 --> 00:11:42,069
Oof.
317
00:11:42,102 --> 00:11:43,871
You've been pranked...
by time.
318
00:11:43,904 --> 00:11:45,605
Don't give time
all the credit.
319
00:11:45,638 --> 00:11:47,074
I'm also an alcoholic.
320
00:11:47,107 --> 00:11:48,608
[ Laughter ]
See ya, kid.
321
00:11:48,641 --> 00:11:50,577
Look, I've been trying
to get a crew to pull off
322
00:11:50,610 --> 00:11:52,245
the most memorable
homecoming prank
323
00:11:52,279 --> 00:11:54,114
Lafayette High
has ever seen.
324
00:11:54,147 --> 00:11:55,916
Who better to help me
than you guys?
325
00:11:55,949 --> 00:11:58,018
Well, uh...thanks
for the offer there, kiddo,
326
00:11:58,051 --> 00:12:00,320
but, uh, we hung it up
a long time ago.
327
00:12:00,353 --> 00:12:02,155
Except for Joey.
He stills streaks.
328
00:12:02,189 --> 00:12:03,791
Nobody wants that, man.
329
00:12:03,824 --> 00:12:05,058
Come on!
Don't you guys hate
330
00:12:05,092 --> 00:12:06,960
how sensitive
this school's become?
331
00:12:06,994 --> 00:12:09,129
We used to be the Vikings,
but that's "too violent,"
332
00:12:09,162 --> 00:12:10,663
so we're the Sea Slugs.
333
00:12:10,697 --> 00:12:13,066
And the student council
just outlawed pranks!
334
00:12:13,100 --> 00:12:14,301
The stupid council
did what?
335
00:12:14,334 --> 00:12:16,837
Whoa! No way.
I need you guys!
336
00:12:16,870 --> 00:12:19,206
Yeah?
Screw it. We're in.
337
00:12:19,239 --> 00:12:20,707
[ Laughter ]
338
00:12:20,740 --> 00:12:22,509
I've finally
found my people.
339
00:12:22,542 --> 00:12:23,977
And you guys are so old,
340
00:12:24,011 --> 00:12:26,246
I bet this will count
as my community service!
341
00:12:26,279 --> 00:12:28,248
**
342
00:12:28,281 --> 00:12:31,084
How are we still
on this same hole?
343
00:12:31,118 --> 00:12:32,719
I have no shot.
344
00:12:32,752 --> 00:12:34,922
I'm just gonna hit your ball
and knock it closer to the hole,
345
00:12:34,955 --> 00:12:37,825
so that way, at least one of us
has a chance to succeed.
346
00:12:37,858 --> 00:12:39,960
Guys, it's just
miniature golf.
347
00:12:39,993 --> 00:12:42,495
And no one is
succeeding.
348
00:12:42,529 --> 00:12:43,897
We've already lost
six balls.
349
00:12:43,931 --> 00:12:45,632
We're just trying
to communicate.
350
00:12:45,665 --> 00:12:47,034
Oh.
351
00:12:47,067 --> 00:12:48,535
Expressing yourself
352
00:12:48,568 --> 00:12:51,171
so you can feel heard
and get on the same page.
353
00:12:51,204 --> 00:12:52,205
Exactly.
354
00:12:52,239 --> 00:12:53,073
Yeah, don't do that.
355
00:12:53,106 --> 00:12:54,107
I mean, look at us.
356
00:12:54,141 --> 00:12:55,742
Plenty happens
in our relationship.
357
00:12:55,775 --> 00:12:57,010
We don't
over-examine it.
358
00:12:57,044 --> 00:12:58,478
Your dad doesn't like
Ryan Gosling films,
359
00:12:58,511 --> 00:13:00,347
so I go and see them
by myself.
360
00:13:00,380 --> 00:13:01,448
Several times.
361
00:13:01,481 --> 00:13:03,083
Your mom's got a drawer full
of rubber bands
362
00:13:03,116 --> 00:13:04,317
on her side of the bed.
363
00:13:04,351 --> 00:13:06,586
I don't know why.
Don't care to ask.
364
00:13:06,619 --> 00:13:08,555
Finger guns.
I shoot you while you sleep.
365
00:13:08,588 --> 00:13:09,556
Sounds fun.
366
00:13:09,589 --> 00:13:11,191
We used to go to Vegas
all the time.
367
00:13:11,224 --> 00:13:12,893
One day,
your dad hates Vegas.
368
00:13:12,926 --> 00:13:14,627
Why? It's a mystery.
369
00:13:14,661 --> 00:13:16,463
But one I'm not
interested in.
370
00:13:16,496 --> 00:13:17,998
Uh, let's not get into the Vegas
thing in front of the kids.
371
00:13:18,031 --> 00:13:19,867
Why?
You know why.
372
00:13:19,900 --> 00:13:22,669
What? No, I don't.
I really don't.
373
00:13:22,702 --> 00:13:23,971
Because he's too cheap
to gamble.
374
00:13:24,004 --> 00:13:25,805
That's not why.
You know.
375
00:13:25,839 --> 00:13:27,507
Blackjack math makes him
feel dumb?
376
00:13:27,540 --> 00:13:28,675
Just shoot your ball.
377
00:13:28,708 --> 00:13:30,443
Well, now I care.
So what is it?
378
00:13:30,477 --> 00:13:32,579
[ Scoffs ]
You're kidding, right?
379
00:13:32,612 --> 00:13:35,415
Last time I was in Vegas
was 16 years ago,
380
00:13:35,448 --> 00:13:37,417
Eddie's bachelor party?
381
00:13:37,450 --> 00:13:39,052
You wanted to bring JJ
to the doctor
382
00:13:39,086 --> 00:13:40,220
'cause you thought
something was up,
383
00:13:40,253 --> 00:13:41,654
and I said,
"You're nuts!"
384
00:13:41,688 --> 00:13:43,891
So I go off, and you take him
to the doctor alone,
385
00:13:43,924 --> 00:13:45,292
and I learn that
386
00:13:45,325 --> 00:13:47,794
our son has this
life-changing diagnosis
387
00:13:47,827 --> 00:13:50,797
on a pay phone in a casino
300 miles away.
388
00:13:50,830 --> 00:13:53,000
And whatever I do,
if I live to be 500,
389
00:13:53,033 --> 00:13:55,568
I'm not gonna make up for
the fact that I left you alone
390
00:13:55,602 --> 00:13:57,604
at the scariest moment
of our life.
391
00:13:57,637 --> 00:13:59,206
You hold on to all that?
392
00:14:02,475 --> 00:14:06,046
I don't think they're gonna be
our couple friends.
393
00:14:06,079 --> 00:14:07,480
Hi, JJ.
394
00:14:07,514 --> 00:14:10,250
You and Nora
are so cute together.
395
00:14:10,283 --> 00:14:11,952
You know,
I have to admit,
396
00:14:11,985 --> 00:14:14,421
I am a little disappointed
that you're taken.
397
00:14:14,454 --> 00:14:16,890
JJ is listening.
398
00:14:16,924 --> 00:14:19,526
Well, um, if you're
ever available,
399
00:14:19,559 --> 00:14:22,229
I would love to introduce you
to my cousin Sue.
400
00:14:22,262 --> 00:14:24,164
She's single,
ready to mingle,
401
00:14:24,197 --> 00:14:27,634
and, most importantly,
she has spina bifida.
402
00:14:27,667 --> 00:14:29,636
She's in a wheelchair
like you!
403
00:14:29,669 --> 00:14:35,808
**
404
00:14:35,842 --> 00:14:37,945
Kenneth: Nora!
405
00:14:37,978 --> 00:14:40,747
"I changed my mind.
406
00:14:40,780 --> 00:14:42,449
Screw these people.
407
00:14:42,482 --> 00:14:44,351
Let's win
and give that speech."
408
00:14:44,384 --> 00:14:45,518
Let's do it.
409
00:14:45,552 --> 00:14:50,023
Vote for Jora --
Homecoming King and Queen!
410
00:14:50,057 --> 00:14:54,261
[ Cheers and applause ]
411
00:14:54,294 --> 00:14:56,229
Hey, hey, hey, hey!
No, no, no, no, no, no, no!
412
00:14:56,263 --> 00:14:57,230
Hey, hey!
413
00:14:57,264 --> 00:14:58,999
That's not how we want to win.
Okay?
414
00:15:02,002 --> 00:15:03,370
Another hole in one?
415
00:15:03,403 --> 00:15:04,671
That's like five in a row.
416
00:15:04,704 --> 00:15:06,506
Do I not
suck at something?
417
00:15:06,539 --> 00:15:08,541
You weren't
overanalyzing it.
418
00:15:08,575 --> 00:15:10,944
You were kind of
just mindlessly chitchatting.
419
00:15:10,978 --> 00:15:12,845
I wouldn't say
mindlessly.
420
00:15:12,879 --> 00:15:16,349
Your parents might be right
about us overthinking things.
421
00:15:16,383 --> 00:15:17,484
Maybe they were.
422
00:15:17,517 --> 00:15:19,086
Are they okay?
423
00:15:19,119 --> 00:15:20,620
Do you want to go back
and talk to them?
424
00:15:20,653 --> 00:15:21,854
I should.
425
00:15:21,888 --> 00:15:24,091
Dear God!
They're catching up!
426
00:15:24,124 --> 00:15:25,658
Gotta get it.
427
00:15:25,692 --> 00:15:28,861
I hate, hate, hate
that you've held onto this
428
00:15:28,895 --> 00:15:30,030
for so many years.
429
00:15:30,063 --> 00:15:31,164
You're right.
430
00:15:31,198 --> 00:15:32,765
It's good that I wasn't
there for you.
431
00:15:32,799 --> 00:15:35,535
I was there for Eddie,
my most racist friend,
432
00:15:35,568 --> 00:15:37,270
who turned out to be
the least racist
433
00:15:37,304 --> 00:15:38,605
of hi group of friends.
434
00:15:38,638 --> 00:15:41,841
We don't talk about things.
Let's go back to doing that.
435
00:15:41,874 --> 00:15:43,543
Jimmy, we've got to talk
about this.
436
00:15:43,576 --> 00:15:45,678
Uh [Sighs]
437
00:15:45,712 --> 00:15:47,714
Nothing would've been different
if you'd been there.
438
00:15:47,747 --> 00:15:49,916
It was just one night.
439
00:15:49,949 --> 00:15:54,087
You've been there every day
and every night ever since.
440
00:15:54,121 --> 00:15:55,888
I don't hold it
against you, Jimmy.
441
00:15:55,922 --> 00:15:59,159
[ Inhales sharply ]
That makes one of us.
442
00:15:59,192 --> 00:16:01,728
Well...
443
00:16:01,761 --> 00:16:03,796
I was gonna wait
till you were asleep
444
00:16:03,830 --> 00:16:06,266
to give you this.
445
00:16:06,299 --> 00:16:07,700
But I think
it's probably better now.
446
00:16:10,670 --> 00:16:12,072
Hurts a lot, actually.
447
00:16:12,105 --> 00:16:13,506
[ School bell rings ]
448
00:16:13,540 --> 00:16:15,408
Pete, you'll be on lookout.
449
00:16:15,442 --> 00:16:18,778
Doug, gonna set you
in the stands before the game.
450
00:16:18,811 --> 00:16:21,748
Joey, you head
into that storage room
451
00:16:21,781 --> 00:16:23,750
and bring out
all the Viking stuff --
452
00:16:23,783 --> 00:16:25,752
with clothes on.
453
00:16:25,785 --> 00:16:28,021
Meanwhile, we'll get
Miller's car keys
454
00:16:28,055 --> 00:16:29,722
while she's addressing
the crowd.
455
00:16:29,756 --> 00:16:31,024
Gonna need somebody fast.
456
00:16:31,058 --> 00:16:32,492
How 'bout Ben's wife?
457
00:16:32,525 --> 00:16:33,660
[ Laughter ]
458
00:16:33,693 --> 00:16:34,961
Hey, hey, hey, hey!
459
00:16:34,994 --> 00:16:36,696
Come on!
Keep it clean.
460
00:16:36,729 --> 00:16:38,731
That's not what your mom said
last night.
461
00:16:38,765 --> 00:16:40,867
[ Laughter ]
462
00:16:40,900 --> 00:16:45,405
**
463
00:16:45,438 --> 00:16:47,540
Oh, you're leaving me.
That seems fair.
464
00:16:47,574 --> 00:16:49,008
I'm leaving with you.
465
00:16:49,042 --> 00:16:50,877
Our flight leaves
in 30 minutes.
466
00:16:50,910 --> 00:16:52,045
Where are we going?
467
00:16:52,079 --> 00:16:53,746
Oh, I'm not talking.
It's our thing.
468
00:16:53,780 --> 00:16:54,947
[ Chuckles ] All right.
469
00:16:54,981 --> 00:16:55,948
But you're gonna
have to check that.
470
00:16:55,982 --> 00:16:57,217
It's way too big
for a carry-on.
471
00:16:57,250 --> 00:16:58,418
It's okay.
I know a guy.
472
00:16:58,451 --> 00:16:59,919
A guy who can make
overhead bins larger?
473
00:16:59,952 --> 00:17:01,721
[ Marching band plays ]
474
00:17:01,754 --> 00:17:03,290
[ Laughter ]
475
00:17:03,323 --> 00:17:06,059
I feel a little
conspicuous.
476
00:17:06,093 --> 00:17:07,260
Be cool.
477
00:17:07,294 --> 00:17:08,995
We're just five old dudes
and a young girl
478
00:17:09,028 --> 00:17:10,797
wearing all black
at a football game.
479
00:17:10,830 --> 00:17:11,964
[ Chuckles ]
480
00:17:11,998 --> 00:17:14,734
Look at us being
all spontaneous.
481
00:17:14,767 --> 00:17:17,837
The old us would've agonized
over where to sit for an hour.
482
00:17:17,870 --> 00:17:19,639
But these were
the first seats we saw,
483
00:17:19,672 --> 00:17:20,773
and they're great.
484
00:17:20,807 --> 00:17:22,709
And this $6 popcorn?
485
00:17:22,742 --> 00:17:24,043
An impulsive delight.
486
00:17:24,077 --> 00:17:26,346
I like the new
no-thinking us.
487
00:17:26,379 --> 00:17:27,947
You know what?
488
00:17:27,980 --> 00:17:29,516
So do I.
489
00:17:29,549 --> 00:17:31,484
Forget thinking.
490
00:17:31,518 --> 00:17:32,885
Taylor...
491
00:17:32,919 --> 00:17:34,487
I love you.
492
00:17:34,521 --> 00:17:36,289
Whoa!
493
00:17:36,323 --> 00:17:39,058
Ray, it's --
it's way too soon for that.
494
00:17:39,092 --> 00:17:40,860
Get it, Taylor?
495
00:17:40,893 --> 00:17:43,363
That's -- That's what
I'm talking about.
496
00:17:43,396 --> 00:17:45,532
Some thinking.
497
00:17:45,565 --> 00:17:47,066
Balance.
498
00:17:47,100 --> 00:17:50,737
**
499
00:17:50,770 --> 00:17:52,272
Hello, everyone.
500
00:17:52,305 --> 00:17:55,408
Are you ready to crown
your Homecoming King and Queen?
501
00:17:55,442 --> 00:17:56,309
Yay!
502
00:17:56,343 --> 00:17:57,410
Student:
Don't rap again!
503
00:17:57,444 --> 00:17:59,078
[ Laughter ]
Let the white lady rap!
504
00:17:59,112 --> 00:18:01,148
I wasn't going to.
505
00:18:01,181 --> 00:18:03,216
What's up, homies?
506
00:18:03,250 --> 00:18:05,118
It's going down.
507
00:18:05,152 --> 00:18:09,021
The king and the queen,
they 'bout to get crowned.
508
00:18:09,055 --> 00:18:10,957
[ Drumroll, fanfare ]
And the lucky couple is...
509
00:18:10,990 --> 00:18:13,526
Josh Porter
and Mariabelle Jackson!
510
00:18:13,560 --> 00:18:14,827
Yay!
511
00:18:14,861 --> 00:18:16,196
[ Marching band plays ]
[ Cheers and applause ]
512
00:18:16,229 --> 00:18:18,331
Wow. I really
thought we'd win,
513
00:18:18,365 --> 00:18:19,499
but they went with
a run-of-the-mill
514
00:18:19,532 --> 00:18:20,600
hot white couple.
515
00:18:20,633 --> 00:18:21,701
Our king...
516
00:18:21,734 --> 00:18:24,237
"Guess that's..." P-R--
"...progress?"
517
00:18:24,271 --> 00:18:27,707
I guess this school
isn't as far gone as I thought.
518
00:18:27,740 --> 00:18:29,709
"I guess you're right."
519
00:18:29,742 --> 00:18:31,511
Yeah.
520
00:18:31,544 --> 00:18:33,413
Too bad we have
to break up,
521
00:18:33,446 --> 00:18:36,015
because I got jealous
that Kendall Jenner
522
00:18:36,048 --> 00:18:39,018
kept sending you e-mails
constantly!
523
00:18:39,051 --> 00:18:42,189
**
524
00:18:42,222 --> 00:18:45,292
Am I nuts?
I'm kinda feeling you two.
525
00:18:45,325 --> 00:18:46,726
**
526
00:18:46,759 --> 00:18:48,428
At a time where
no one understood me,
527
00:18:48,461 --> 00:18:50,397
you guys were there.
528
00:18:50,430 --> 00:18:53,533
It's been an absolute honor
working with you.
529
00:18:53,566 --> 00:18:55,368
Thanks for bringing us in
on this, Dylan.
530
00:18:55,402 --> 00:18:57,304
From now on,
consider yourself
531
00:18:57,337 --> 00:18:59,606
an honorary
Prankenstein Monster.
532
00:18:59,639 --> 00:19:01,541
[ Laughter ]
533
00:19:01,574 --> 00:19:03,210
Dylan, we'll take
the back.
534
00:19:03,243 --> 00:19:05,445
It's your idea.
You drive.
535
00:19:05,478 --> 00:19:07,714
Whoa.
536
00:19:07,747 --> 00:19:11,551
I won't let you guys down.
537
00:19:11,584 --> 00:19:15,188
Saddle up, boys,
because this is gonna be huge.
538
00:19:15,222 --> 00:19:17,790
All right, you heard the lady!
Saddle up, fellas!
539
00:19:17,824 --> 00:19:20,293
**
540
00:19:20,327 --> 00:19:24,464
[ Cheers and applause ]
541
00:19:24,497 --> 00:19:28,134
Death to Sea Slugs!
Go, Vikings!
542
00:19:28,167 --> 00:19:29,569
[ Cheering continues ]
543
00:19:29,602 --> 00:19:31,404
That's my car, dawg.
544
00:19:31,438 --> 00:19:32,872
**
545
00:19:32,905 --> 00:19:35,342
We did it, guys.
546
00:19:35,375 --> 00:19:36,776
Guys?
547
00:19:39,078 --> 00:19:42,882
[ Crowd chanting "Dylan!" ]
548
00:19:42,915 --> 00:19:44,584
Wait. What?
549
00:19:46,453 --> 00:19:47,987
[ Laughter ]
550
00:19:48,020 --> 00:19:50,790
You guys pranked me?
No way!
551
00:19:50,823 --> 00:19:52,759
You guys are
frickin' legends!
552
00:19:52,792 --> 00:19:53,493
[ Laughter ]
553
00:19:53,526 --> 00:19:54,427
Hey!
554
00:19:54,461 --> 00:19:56,929
Hey, hey, hey!
555
00:19:56,963 --> 00:19:58,030
[ Chanting continues ]
556
00:19:58,064 --> 00:20:00,199
Dylan DiMeo, you come
back here right now!
557
00:20:00,233 --> 00:20:02,669
Give me my keys,
girl!
558
00:20:02,702 --> 00:20:03,803
[ Crowd cheers ]
559
00:20:03,836 --> 00:20:06,639
Oh, my God!
Streaker!
560
00:20:06,673 --> 00:20:07,607
[ Laughs ]
561
00:20:07,640 --> 00:20:08,941
Woo-hoo!
562
00:20:08,975 --> 00:20:10,610
[ Slot machines dinging ]
563
00:20:10,643 --> 00:20:11,911
I-I kind of figured
564
00:20:11,944 --> 00:20:13,580
some of the clothes
in that suitcase
565
00:20:13,613 --> 00:20:14,847
would've been mine.
566
00:20:14,881 --> 00:20:16,816
Oh, no, you get the surprise,
I get the costume change.
567
00:20:16,849 --> 00:20:18,751
Oh.
This is very sweet.
568
00:20:18,785 --> 00:20:21,254
Well, I thought it was time
for us to make a new memory.
569
00:20:21,288 --> 00:20:22,221
[ Chuckles ]
570
00:20:22,255 --> 00:20:24,156
Can you forgive
yourself?
571
00:20:24,190 --> 00:20:25,625
Well,
by all appearances,
572
00:20:25,658 --> 00:20:27,226
I'm paying you
by the hour.
573
00:20:27,260 --> 00:20:30,129
It would be dumb to waste it
beating myself up.
574
00:20:30,162 --> 00:20:32,131
Maybe Ray and Taylor
were right.
575
00:20:32,164 --> 00:20:34,200
We could stand to talk
a bit more.
576
00:20:34,233 --> 00:20:36,002
Yeah, let's.
577
00:20:36,035 --> 00:20:37,837
But not tonight.
578
00:20:37,870 --> 00:20:38,971
Should we go back
up to the room
579
00:20:39,005 --> 00:20:40,673
I have no idea how
we're going to pay for?
580
00:20:40,707 --> 00:20:42,275
[ Scoffs ]
Honey, I got this.
581
00:20:42,309 --> 00:20:44,377
Hmm?
582
00:20:44,411 --> 00:20:47,314
Okay. Come on!
Money for a room!
583
00:20:47,347 --> 00:20:48,848
And whatever a 401(k) is!
584
00:20:48,881 --> 00:20:50,182
Man: Here we go!
585
00:20:50,216 --> 00:20:51,050
Dealer: Winner, 4!
586
00:20:51,083 --> 00:20:52,319
Yes! Ha!
587
00:20:55,254 --> 00:20:56,088
Let's do it.
Wait.
588
00:20:56,122 --> 00:20:57,089
Uh, my physical therapist
589
00:20:57,123 --> 00:20:58,525
is coming to pick me up
any second,
590
00:20:58,558 --> 00:20:59,859
and I want you
to meet her.
591
00:20:59,892 --> 00:21:01,628
We got to get home.
592
00:21:01,661 --> 00:21:06,032
"We really want you
to meet..." A-Y-E --
593
00:21:06,065 --> 00:21:08,335
"...Ayeisha."
594
00:21:08,368 --> 00:21:09,569
Seriously?
595
00:21:09,602 --> 00:21:11,604
We think you'll have a lot
in common with her.
596
00:21:11,638 --> 00:21:13,039
Oh, is that so?
597
00:21:13,072 --> 00:21:15,007
After all you two
just been through.
598
00:21:15,041 --> 00:21:17,444
Let me guess one small detail
about Ayeisha.
599
00:21:18,778 --> 00:21:20,079
**
600
00:21:20,112 --> 00:21:23,816
It's that she completes me.
[ Chuckles ]
601
00:21:23,850 --> 00:21:25,885
Well, there's shipping,
and then there's fate.
602
00:21:25,918 --> 00:21:27,587
[ Chuckles ]
603
00:21:27,620 --> 00:21:28,688
Hey, girl!
41533
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