All language subtitles for Empty Nest s01e20 Cyrano de Weston.eng

uh-huh.

Uh-huh.

Uh-huh.

Laverne, would you confirm

my lunch reservation
at the sea grotto?

I'm doing it now.

Uh-huh, near the window.

Oh, hey, and they are saving me

my favorite table
overlooking the bay.

I'm doing it now.

- Laverne...
- You want to do this?

No, just go ahead.

That's right,
Dr. Weston at 1:00.

Don't forget to mention
the Teddy bear.

Do I have to?

Come on, Laverne;
It's our two-month anniversary.

You know, Fran loves
stuffed bears.

It's a very romantic touch.

There will also be
a six-foot Teddy bear arriving.

Uh-huh, from fay-oh schwarz.

Like it sounds, f-a-o, "fay-oh."

He wants the stupid thing
seated at the table

when they arrive.

Does it smoke?

Apparently not.

Thank you.

You're confirmed:
Idiot, party of three.

Billy, you're finished.

Tell your mother you're fine.

The o'reillys called.

Little Eric's fever's
gone back to normal.

Oh, that's good.

I was getting so worried
about him.

And your neighbor Charley called

to ask if you'd stop by
his place tonight.

He said it's urgent.

Urgent? Ah, Fran!

Oh, you look so pretty.

Oh, thank you.

I just wish I knew
where you were taking me.

Where is he taking me?

No, no, no, no, no.
You'll find out.

First I just got to get
my jacket.

The time and thought
he puts into these dates.

Yeah, his thought, my time.

Okay, shall we go?

You two have a real romantic
lunch, now, you hear?

Thank you, dear.

Be back by 2:30;
You have a boil to Lance.

Charley, you said it was urgent.

What's the problem?

I met a woman.

That sounds like a problem
for the woman.

Harry, I was driving
through the neighborhood,

and I saw this very classy,
very attractive lady.

So I followed her
to where she works.

She looks like an executive;

She had an attache case
and everything.

You know the type:
Real sophisticated,

looks like the kind who votes.

Charley, I'm still not
getting "urgent" here.

I need a favor.

You've dated women like this.

You know what to say to them.

So?

I want you to write
a love letter.

I'll put it on her windshield.

She'll think it's from me.

I'll get a date.

You want me to compose
a love letter for a windshield?

Right!

And I'll put my name on it,

just like in that
Steve Martin movie Roxanne.

You mean cyrano de bergerac.

Hold it.

Some guy ripped off
Steve Martin?

Charley, look,
I've been so busy lately,

I haven't had time
for my own romance.

Besides, another person cannot
write love letters for you.

If you really feel something
for this woman,

the words will just flow
from your heart.

Okay.

"Dear mystery lady,."

"I hate Harry."

Any mail for me, daddy?

No, dear, just this letter
from your uncle Gus.

Ah, that's a shame.

Your great-aunt Celia
from Syracuse died

three weeks ago.

Aunt Celia the crazy lady?

Barbara, aunt Celia
was not a crazy lady.

She was a little eccentric,
a little colorful.

She was from the old country.

Daddy, she was a nut bucket.

She claimed the first
three years of her life,

she existed on nothing but wood.

Good morning, everybody.

Oh, it's a beautiful day.

The sun is shining.

Isn't it great to be alive?

Aunt Celia's dead.

What?

Great-aunt Celia
from Syracuse died.

Oh, my god.

How?

She was 97 years old;
I'm guessing old age.

- When?
- Three weeks ago.

Three weeks ago?

Why didn't somebody tell us
before?

Uncle Gus just wrote us
about it.

Oh, my god.

Carol, we weren't that close.

You weren't that close.

I was close.

I loved that lady.

She was a vital, vibrant woman
with a wealth of stories.

Aunt Celia was a nut.

She used to talk to herself,
then complain of hearing voices.

You never understood her,
Barbara.

You and Emily used to taunt her
and then run off and play.

Some of the most important
moments of my life

were spent at her knee,

listening to her stories
of romance and intrigue,

all about her childhood
in pre-war Russia.

Carol, you are getting
all worked up

over woman who claimed
she double-dated

with kaiser Wilhelm.

Daddy, I want to visit
aunt Celia's grave.

Uh, there is no grave.

Aunt Celia's last request
was that her body be cremated

and her ashes scattered
over a dance hall in Minsk.

Right.

She's normal.

Harry, gotta talk.

You were right
about the love letter.

It's got to come from me.

So I bought a dictionary,

and I've been searching
through it,

trying to find the right words.

By the way, Carol,
I don't appreciate

what you called me last year.

I wonder if there's
a discount airfare to Minsk.

I would think
there'd have to be.

Harry, I composed a letter
to this lady,

and I'd like to get
your feedback.

Okay, go ahead.

Okay.

"Dear classy lady,

"you're so pretty.

You'd even capture
the attention of an aardvark."

You didn't get very far
in that dictionary,

did you, Charley?

You're right.

The aardvark thing
sounds stupid to me now,

and it was the lynchpin
of the whole letter.

I'll never connect
with a lady like that.

Charley, don't say that.

I'm fine with bimbos,

but I'll never do better
than lolas and jodies

and heathers,

girls with big hoop earrings
and spandex.

You know what I am, Harry?

I'm a tramp.

- I'm a male tramp.
- Mm-hmm.

All I ever think about
is going to be with a woman.

Let's face it; That's all
I'm really good for.

But the funny thing is,
with this woman,

I'm not even thinking
about that right now.

I just want to get to know her.

Why didn't you put that kind
of sentiment in your letter?

That's what I was going for
with the aardvark thing.

All right, Charley,
I will do it for you.

I will write your letter.
I will play cyrano.

Oh, Harry, you're a great guy.

You're a good friend,
a neighbor,

and an aborigine.

Oh, Fran, I'm so sorry
about tonight,

but I have to cover
for Dr. Gordon.

Yeah, I know,
we were going to go sailing

under the full moon.

But we'll go next week.

It'll only be a half moon,

but I promise to be
twice as attentive.

Oh, that's sweet.

Mm-hmm.

All right, dear.
Thanks a lot. Bye.

Well, let's see if I can
at least get Charley fixed up.

All right, come on.

Tell me what you think of this.

"You'll excuse my boldness,

"but I can't let any possible
chance of meeting you slip away.

"I'd ask you to a movie,

"but I don't want to come away
from an evening with you

knowing a movie
and not knowing you."

Well, it's certainly
more romantic

than that Chinese takeout menu
I found on my windshield

this morning.

I like it.

If somebody left me a note
like that on my car,

I'd want to meet him.

If somebody left you
a Chinese takeout menu,

you'd want to meet him.

Ba-ba-ba-ba,
don't start with this.

What...

Oh, hi.

Hi, I got registered letters

for Barbara Weston
and Emily Weston.

Okay, I'll sign for them,
all right?

This is you, dear. Yeah.

Thank you.

And there's the rest
of your mail.

Thank you. Bye.

Barbara and Emily
got registered letters?

Yeah. Yes, they did.

And, oh wait, a whole bunch
of mail for you.

I don't believe this.

What?

It's from uncle Gus in Syracuse.

"As executor
of Celia Ludwig's estate,

"I am pleased to inform you

that your aunt Celia has
left you the sum enclosed."

$2,000!

Oh, $2,000!

Under the circumstances,
I don't think your sister Emily

would mind my rifling
through her mail.

$2,000 for Emily too.

Carol, what did you get?

I got, um, a telephone bill,
two catalogs,

and I'm due
for my distemper shot.

Carol, you know how screwy
the mail is.

Aunt Celia would never
forget you.

No, you're the one who
listened to all her stories.

You're right.

I was the loving
and attentive one.

I'm sure she's sending me
something very special.

After all, I was
her little caroluska.

She didn't have a name for you.

Funny, she managed
to get it right on the check.

All right, Benny, see ya.

All right, where do I go next?

Room one.

The o'reillys called;

Little Eric's temperature
is back up,

and he's got
severe stomach pains.

This doesn't sound good.

All right, let's check him
into the hospital,

and we'll run a blood culture
on him.

Right.

I'll get it.
I'll get it. I'll get it.

Dr. Weston's office.

- Harry, it's Charley.
- Hi Charles.

Hey, congratulate me
and congratulate yourself.

Your letter did the trick;
I got a lunch date with her.

Ah, good!

But listen, she's waiting
at a table right now

to meet me, and I'm stuck
for an opening line.

Harry, what do I say to her?

I don't know.

Charley, just be yourself.

Wait, wait, wait.
Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

Maybe I should give you
something.

You could try,
"thank you for coming,

"and even if this doesn't
work out,

"you've already given me

one of the nicest moments
of my life."

Okay, I'll give it a shot.

Boy, I can't wait
for you two to meet.

Hi.

Hi.

Thank you for coming.

You know, even if this doesn't
work out,

you've already given me

one of the nicest moments
of my life.

Oh, Charley, that's very sweet.

Now, how's this
for a romantic getaway?

A bottle of wine,
some imported cheese,

and a hot air balloon ride
over the countryside?

Well, you certainly take Fran

on some interesting dates,
daddy.

No, this isn't for Fran,

although it's a great idea
for her.

I've been so busy lately,
I've really been neglecting her.

But this is balloon thing
is for Charley and his lady.

Charley. Hot air.
It ought to work.

Hey, hey.

What do you think?

Whoo! My daughter looks radiant.

It's part
of my inheritance money.

I thought I'd swing into spring
with a new wardrobe.

It's a lovely outfit, Barbara.

I just put a down payment
on a new oven mitt.

I'm sorry, Carol.
I didn't mean to flaunt it.

I'll go change.

- Hi, guys.
- Charles.

All right,
so did my sky-writing thing

get us another date?

It did.

I have us four dates in a row!

Am I doing some great work here
or what?

Oh, you are, daddy.
You really are.

Now, Charley,
a lady is leaving the room.

Oh.

Carol, have a good evening.

It was lovely seeing you,
especially your chest.

All right, all right,

so we have a few kinks
to work out, that's all.

Charley, I told you
about the chest thing.

Right, right.

I couldn't remember
if it was mention it or don't.

I'm glad we caught it
before your date tonight.

That's the crazy thing
about this woman.

Even when I screw up,
she doesn't mind.

She says I'm unpredictable
and amusing.

Well, that's great, Charley.

I got a little problem, though.

You know how you told me

not to rush
the physical contact?

Yeah, no, this is...
That's very important.

Like the lady I'm seeing
right now,

she respects the fact
that I'm moving very slowly.

Mine's different.

Really?

Yeah, last night
at the restaurant,

she grabbed my leg
under the table.

Well, obviously your lady

is a little more outgoing
than mine.

I really like her, Harry.

But, you know, she said
a couple of things

the other night.

I think she might be seeing
another guy.

Charley, don't worry.

You're with cyrano de Weston.

Sounds like it may be
an older man.

I'm sorry. An older guy.

I hope it isn't his last chance
at love,

because I am afraid

we are about to blow him
out of the water.

Listen...

What do you want?

What do you want?
Do you want to play?

My, dreyfuss?

Okay, dreyfuss, let's go.

Fetch, dreyfuss, fetch!

Okay, forget fetch.

Stay!

Good dog.

Ah, okay.

All right. All right.

Hello.

Did you cook
that Salisbury steak

for the full eight minutes?

No, I didn't. I didn't...

Wait a minute.
How did you know that?

It's Monday, ain't it?

Listen, the hospital called.

The O'Reilly boy's temperature

is going up and down
like a yo-yo.

Oh, he's spiking.

You want to up the dosage?

Yeah, all right.

Why don't we make it...

Wait a minute.
Wait a... wait a minute.

Better yet, have Dr. Miller
run an ultrasound on him.

Ultrasound?

Yeah, it's a rare possibility,

but we may be overlooking
an abscess.

I'll be here until 6:00;
Then I'll be back at the office.

All right, on a more
personal note,

Fran called.

Would you like me to send
her a birthday present?

Oh, my god,
today's her birthday?

Yesterday.

Oh, yesterday!

I completely forgot.

Laverne, do me a favor.

First thing in the morning,
you remind me

to do something very special
for her.

"Save his butt again." Got it.

Daddy, it's here.

- What?
- I don't know.

But it's postmarked Syracuse,
and it's for Carol.

I'm guessing huge wealth.

Carol, huge wealth!

Oh, it's clanky. It's not cash.

Will you stop...

That's your sister's
personal property.

I don't know.
This could be jewelry.

What's up?

Oh, this just arrived
from Syracuse.

Syracuse!

The inheritance capital
of the world.

I knew it. I knew it.

It sounds jiggly.
Does gold bullion jiggle?

Stop with the shaking.

Why are we shaking?

Come on; Just open it.

Wait, there's a note.

"Dear Carol, you were
aunt Celia's favorite niece.

"You were very special to her.

"She left this for you.

Love, uncle Gus."

It's a cassette player.

Ooh, play it!

It could be the combination

to a bank vault in Switzerland.

My dearest caroluska,

you were the only one
who was ever willing

to listen to my stories.

At last, your Patience and love
can be rewarded

with my most priceless
position...

I think we've hit
the mother lode.

My stories.

Story number one.

1913.

It was the year
all the goats died.

I was in the house,
scraping a carp,

when the czarina of Russia
knocked on my door.

You know...

My first instinct

was to smash this machine
on the floor.

But the truth is,
what aunt Celia's left me

is a living legacy.

I mean, money is nice,
but it gets spent.

A dress is fine,
but fashions fade.

This, this...

This is something
that I will have forever.

I have no time for the czarina.

The lentils in my soup
were getting soft,

something that happens
every spring.

Hold it; The cat has something
to say.

Yes! I was right about
Eric O'Reilly's ultrasound.

It is an abscess,

and it can be treated
with antibiotics,

and he's going to be fine.

Oh, congratulations, doctor.

You should be very proud
of yourself.

You know, it's times like these
that make it worthwhile

to work for such a sloppy,
impossible, tardy,

disorganized mess of a doctor
like yourself.

Thank you, Laverne.

And you're fired.

- See ya in the morning.
- See you in the morning.

Hello, Harry.

Oh, Fran! What a great surprise.

Your service told me
you'd be here.

This is wonderful.

Listen,
I am just about to leave.

Let's go out
and have some dinner together.

Harry, I can't see you anymore.

I've met someone else.

Okay, Fran, but that's going
to put a real pall

over our dinner conversation.

I'm sorry to hit you
with this now,

but it just couldn't wait.

The more I see him
and the more I like him,

I realize I can't go out
with two people

at the same time.

Fran, I know
I've been neglecting you,

and I know I forgot
your birthday...

it's not just the birthday,
Harry.

It's a lot of things.

You disappeared out of my life,
while this man is attentive.

He writes me notes.
He excites my imagination.

He's everything you used to be.

Well, Fran,
I'm not giving up this easily.

I'm not.

I mean, you and I
enjoy each other too much.

I tell you what; Tomorrow
I will cancel everything

and I will take you
for a hot air balloon ride

over the countryside.

He took me for one
the other day.

He did that?

I mean, he did the balloon ride?

Yeah, he even brought wine
and cheese.

Fran, come on, please,

some guy brings you wine
and camemberte.

And you fall for him?

No, he brought Cheez whiz.

It's one of the things I like
about him.

He's so unpredictable.

I...

hi, I just thought I'd... Leave.

Charley.

Fran, what are you doing here?

Harry is the gentleman
I've been telling you about.

Whoops.

You two, uh, know each other?

This is very awkward.

Harry, Charley is the man
I've been telling you about.

This is the balloon ride,
the wine, and the camembert?

Camembert!

Charley, what are you doing here?

Me?

Uh, I followed you here.

Why? I don't know.

Call me unpredictable.
Call me amusing.

I just can't stop following you.

Where are we going next?

I can't believe this is the guy.

Maybe we should go.

Harry, I'm sorry. I really am.

Good-bye.

Wait, wait, wait. Just a minute.

I think there's something
you should know about this guy,

this guy right here.

He's a very lucky man,

and I wish you both
the very best.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

Cheez whiz?
She left me for Cheez whiz.

I only have a second, Harry.

Believe me; I didn't realize
that was your lady.

I know that, Charley.

And the truth is,

you didn't lose her to me.

You lost her to you.

Thank you, Charley.

Oh, I almost forgot

why I came down here
to begin with.

I'd really like
to get you a gift

that expresses how I feel
about all you've done for me.

Think of something, would you?

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