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Previously on "Web Therapy"...
2
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We bought the house next door.
3
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Okay, well let's just think
about this carefully, all right?
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- Okay.
- It's a big house.
5
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- I know.
- Very big for two adults
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- and a baby.
- Well, three.
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It's me and Hayley and Gina.
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Gina's already living there.
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- Jerome.
- Yeah?
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I don't know what to do.
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I keep getting these ridiculous bills...
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- Yeah, New York.
- From the building in New York.
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Yes. It's over...
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this time it's $20,000 this month.
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- You know what I was thinking?
- Mmhmm.
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That New York is really
lovely this time of year,
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and if you'd like, I'm happy to offer
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a stay in my penthouse, you know,
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'cause it's...
I think little Angus would have
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a lot of fun there.
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[Jazz music]
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S04E03
Trust Exercise
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sync and corrected by ninh
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- Hello.
- Hello.
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I'm Dr. Fiona Wallice.
And you are Steve Olson.
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- That's right. Steve Olson, yes.
- Yes.
27
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Hi. Thank you for meeting with me.
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Oh, my... it's what I do.
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[Both chuckle] That's what I hear.
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I'm... I'm a little nervous, so...
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Oh, no, nothing to be nervous about.
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- It's only three minutes.
- Okay.
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- And, you know.
- Oh, really? Okay.
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Oh, gosh, I should get going, then, huh?
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Yes, you should. So what's the issue?
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Um, well, I mean, it's... it's...
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- it's high-class problems.
- Oh?
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I've recently fallen into a-a "windfall"
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of, uh...
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- Cash.
- Oh.
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Uh, I have, uh, won
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the New York State Lottery Megamillions.
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- Oh, that's usually a big...
- Yeah, uh...
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- It's $124 million.
- That's a lot of money.
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It's a lot of money.
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Just you? Or do you share the ticket?
47
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- No, just me.
- Oh.
48
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I was obviously very excited to win that.
49
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But I'm having panic attacks
because of the amount of money.
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You know, people are sort of
coming out of the woodwork,
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and, uh,
I'm not sur who I can trust anymore.
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And everyone kind of...
kind of wants a piece.
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- Right, yes.
- And I'm in the... I'm in the...
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I'm in the waters with the piranhas,
so to speak.
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Yes, you are. Don't think you're not.
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I've been getting these
insane business proposals
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just sent to my doorstep.
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- Oh.
- Can I... do you...
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could I show you a few of them?
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Well, we can get to that later.
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- Yeah, later.
- I think we have
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- bigger fish to fry, so to speak.
- Okay, yeah.
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As long as we're staying
with the marine analogy...
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- um, metaphor.
- Mm-hmm. Yeah.
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- Bigger fish to fry... piranhas.
- [Chuckles]
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- Right.
- But I think you've contacted
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the right person.
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Not only am I a therapist,
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but I was in the world of finance.
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Don't know if you know that or not.
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Actually, I-I did... I did know that.
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- I googled you, and, uh...
- So you're very smart also.
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Good for you. You did your research.
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You know, I noticed that you're not working
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- in finance anymore, and...
- Right.
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That's... something that...
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I should not bring up or...
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Oh, you can bring it up.
It's perfectly fine.
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I have nothing to be ashamed of, you know.
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Right, and you are a victim of finance,
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- much like myself, you know.
- Right.
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So I-I definitely felt like maybe you'd be
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the right person to talk to me about this.
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- Yes, I think I am.
- Yeah.
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I think I can really help you a lot,
especially...
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the first thing, though, we need to work on
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- is that trust issue.
- Mm-hmm.
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- I'm swimming upstream...
- Yeah.
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- So to speak, so to speak.
- We can stay
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with that metaphor, I guess.
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Should we try forever?
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- Let's not.
- Okay, okay.
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I was going to say just for this session,
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but we can stop now.
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Well, let's work on something specific.
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We can work on your ability
to trust me, okay?
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So you can trust that what I tell you to do
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is going to be safe and okay.
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- Okay.
- So turn your head to the left.
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- Right now?
- Yes.
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And turn it back.
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Very good. Easy.
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- Yeah.
- Not trying to hurt you.
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No, I mean I-I-I...
also, I hurt myself in yoga,
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so that did hurt a little,
but nothing because of what you did.
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It was just...
- right.
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That's right.
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So try to do whatever I
say without questioning it.
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- That's the next step, okay?
- Oh, so I should...
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All right. Now take a sip of water.
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All right, very good.
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And now the other thing I think is,
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if you can, write a check.
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- Write a check?
- Write a check.
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Uh...
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And, uh, to whom?
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Write a check to Fiona Wallice.
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[Sighs]
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It's a trust exercise.
[Pen clicking rapidly]
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Okay, okay.
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All right.
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W-a-l-l-i-c-e.
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It's spelled a little di...
well, you know, 'cause you...
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Wall... Wall... like "lice"?
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Yes.
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And you make it out...
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And how am I making this out to?
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How much money?
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- Yeah, how much?
- $1 million.
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And in the memo line, what would I put?
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For services rendered.
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I'm wondering how that's going to look
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at the tax end of the year.
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Yeah, it's... okay, so I've done this.
135
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Great. Now rip it up.
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- Oh, gosh.
- You're so relieved.
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- Oh, man.
- So relieved.
138
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- Yes.
- I think that was
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the hardest thing that I made you do.
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Yeah, that was... I'm sweaty.
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Yes, I won't make you
pay me a million dollars.
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That's outrageous.
- [Chuckles]
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So I'm just trying to demonstrate
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that you can trust me.
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Fiona, I can't... I can't thank you enough.
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This is... this is great.
This has been so help...
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I feel like I've really
reeled in the right...
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the right person, you know.
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- Fish metaphor, all right.
- There it is.
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We'll figure out what
that's about too or not.
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Yeah, well, that'd be... to tackle.
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- Yeah.
- So we can tackle that later.
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Again. [Chuckles]
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But, no, this is great.
I mean, obviously, you know,
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trusting has been an issue for me
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and here you are in my home
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- on my computer.
- Right.
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I don't know how I'm going to operate
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with people in the real world yet,
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but that's to be, you know,
determined later, I suppose
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Yes. Well, listen, you know,
I'm going to be in New York
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- next week...
- Oh.
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And I know this is a little unorthodox,
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but I think you're special.
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So I'm going to arrange
for us to have lunch.
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- Oh, man.
- And then I will go over
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all of the proposals with you.
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- Would you do that?
- Yes, tell you which ones
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to cast aside. [Chuckles]
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- Oh, man.
- "Cast aside."
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Just to get some of these off my, uh...
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- Yes.
- Off my shoulders.
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That'd be great.
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Yeah, most of them will be gone.
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I'll do this this week.
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Baby pet perfume...
that one actually sounds like it might...
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We'll look at that.
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- Don't do anything yet without me.
- Okay.
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- Oh, my God.
- Hi, Gina.
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Hi. What's up, biznatch?
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What? I didn't understand everything.
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I am so sorry to be calling you again.
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Well, yeah, I'm busy.
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I'm trying to get stuff done, so...
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I am just so bored out of my skulleton.
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- I'm bored.
- Oh.
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- It's so boring.
- Well, then you need
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to find something to occupy your time.
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[Chuckles]
Well, you know,
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I thought, you know,
I'd do this home renovation,
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'cause I've always wanted to do it.
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- Right.
- Because, like, who doesn't
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want to fuck the village people?
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But I fucked all of them.
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Oh, that's why you wanted to do it, yeah.
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The construction worker, the police man,
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the indian, the plumber.
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The indian's providing what service
199
00:07:10,201 --> 00:07:11,701
on the construction site?
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- [Laughing]
- Okay, listen...
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00:07:13,455 --> 00:07:16,673
The thing is,
is that the noise is too much.
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00:07:16,708 --> 00:07:18,341
- I agree, I agree.
- You know?
203
00:07:18,376 --> 00:07:20,126
- But they're prolonging it.
- Right.
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Why would they rush through something
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when they can save money on brothels?
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Well, I think you're totally right.
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And I mean, we've been deciding what to do
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with the pool, which is...
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it's a kidney-shaped pool.
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Right, like most of them are.
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And we're doing it, um...
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you know, it's like a big, giant selfie,
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- but of my vagina.
- Oh.
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And it's like when you dive into the pool,
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it's like you're going to
be diving into my vagina.
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- Right, so...
- Only drier.
217
00:07:52,077 --> 00:07:55,545
[Both laughing]
218
00:07:55,580 --> 00:07:57,580
That's porn comedy.
219
00:07:57,632 --> 00:07:59,999
That's so funny. Yeah.
220
00:08:00,051 --> 00:08:02,251
Well, let's... I liked the original idea.
221
00:08:02,304 --> 00:08:04,087
And, you know,
every time you make a change,
222
00:08:04,089 --> 00:08:06,172
it costs more money and takes more time.
223
00:08:06,224 --> 00:08:08,007
- It does.
- Every time you sleep
224
00:08:08,059 --> 00:08:09,809
with one of them,
they need to nap afterwards
225
00:08:09,844 --> 00:08:11,311
before they can go to work.
226
00:08:11,346 --> 00:08:13,680
Why don't you make a living for yourself?
227
00:08:13,732 --> 00:08:16,099
- Well...
- That's where I think
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00:08:16,151 --> 00:08:19,102
real fulfillment comes.
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- So I have to find a job?
- That's right.
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00:08:22,857 --> 00:08:25,108
All right, well, and I have a job
231
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that I need to get back to.
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So good luck to you, Gina.
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Okay. Bye, lover.
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00:08:30,615 --> 00:08:32,999
Well, I'm not.
235
00:08:37,389 --> 00:08:40,006
- Hello, Jerome.
- Hi, Dr. Wallice.
236
00:08:40,041 --> 00:08:42,291
- Oh, my goodness.
- That's my penthouse?
237
00:08:42,293 --> 00:08:43,960
Yes, thank you.
238
00:08:43,962 --> 00:08:45,345
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
239
00:08:45,380 --> 00:08:46,629
You moved everything around and...
240
00:08:46,681 --> 00:08:48,131
Well, we did a little shift.
241
00:08:48,133 --> 00:08:49,966
We had to "babify"
the penthouse a little bit.
242
00:08:50,018 --> 00:08:51,351
- Oh.
- Yeah, but Angus
243
00:08:51,386 --> 00:08:54,020
sort of dictated what
he wanted in what areas,
244
00:08:54,055 --> 00:08:55,805
and we let him push some things aside.
245
00:08:55,807 --> 00:08:57,974
- Really?
- We got his playpen...
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00:08:57,976 --> 00:08:59,275
you had two of the same chair,
247
00:08:59,310 --> 00:09:00,727
so we thought it was okay if we move
248
00:09:00,779 --> 00:09:02,278
one of the chairs into the bedroom.
249
00:09:02,313 --> 00:09:03,980
And I moved your desk out
250
00:09:03,982 --> 00:09:06,149
so we can have more feeding
area in the living room.
251
00:09:06,201 --> 00:09:07,116
He loves the living room.
252
00:09:07,152 --> 00:09:08,201
- Go figure.
- Oh.
253
00:09:08,236 --> 00:09:09,786
Angus is all sophisticated
254
00:09:09,821 --> 00:09:11,204
and likes to hang out in the living room,
so...
255
00:09:11,239 --> 00:09:12,321
- Right, I forgot...
- Yeah.
256
00:09:12,374 --> 00:09:14,040
- About all the...
- The baby.
257
00:09:14,075 --> 00:09:15,742
- Delicate furniture and things.
- Right.
258
00:09:15,794 --> 00:09:17,910
Well, we... no, don't...
oh, thank you for saying that.
259
00:09:17,962 --> 00:09:20,380
Don't worry.
He did not hurt himself on anything.
260
00:09:20,415 --> 00:09:24,050
We "babified" most of the
living room furniture with foam.
261
00:09:24,085 --> 00:09:25,551
We have a spray foam,
262
00:09:25,587 --> 00:09:27,637
which we sprayed all along the baseboards.
263
00:09:27,672 --> 00:09:28,671
So it's working out great.
264
00:09:28,673 --> 00:09:30,006
How does it come up, though?
265
00:09:30,058 --> 00:09:31,924
I mean, is it going to take the paint off?
266
00:09:31,976 --> 00:09:34,677
Let me check, let me see. Hold on.
267
00:09:34,679 --> 00:09:36,979
I mean,
are these permanent changes you've made?
268
00:09:37,015 --> 00:09:40,683
Yes, it takes out...
it takes off a layer of paint.
269
00:09:40,735 --> 00:09:43,152
It does.
It... it pulls a layer of paint right off,
270
00:09:43,188 --> 00:09:44,821
but I'm going to have...
271
00:09:44,856 --> 00:09:46,906
I'll have somebody come in.
I can have somebody come in.
272
00:09:46,941 --> 00:09:48,941
- Thank you. Yeah.
- My pleasure, my pleasure.
273
00:09:48,993 --> 00:09:50,443
And speaking of people coming in,
274
00:09:50,495 --> 00:09:52,111
we've been doing... you know, as you know,
275
00:09:52,163 --> 00:09:54,030
we've been doing some
potty-training for Angus.
276
00:09:54,032 --> 00:09:57,033
- Oh, right, except you don't.
- He's doing great.
277
00:09:57,085 --> 00:09:59,869
He's started to make a little poopy face.
278
00:09:59,921 --> 00:10:01,621
- Uh-huh.
- And he loves...
279
00:10:01,673 --> 00:10:04,340
he makes that face... this one.
280
00:10:04,375 --> 00:10:05,708
Right. [Chuckles]
281
00:10:05,760 --> 00:10:07,210
He makes that face a lot.
282
00:10:07,212 --> 00:10:09,512
And by the way,
he makes that face other times too, so...
283
00:10:09,547 --> 00:10:11,714
Right, so you rushed him
and put him on the toilet.
284
00:10:11,766 --> 00:10:13,933
People find that if you
rush a baby to a toilet,
285
00:10:13,968 --> 00:10:15,768
it makes them feel anxious.
286
00:10:15,804 --> 00:10:18,304
It makes them feel like what
they're doing is not okay.
287
00:10:18,356 --> 00:10:19,889
Well, pooping's not okay...
288
00:10:19,941 --> 00:10:21,691
- Well, pooping is...
- if it's not on a toilet.
289
00:10:21,726 --> 00:10:23,226
It's natural. It's natural.
290
00:10:23,278 --> 00:10:25,895
And we found that he makes poopy face a lot
291
00:10:25,897 --> 00:10:28,397
on your chinchilla duvet, so...
292
00:10:28,450 --> 00:10:30,283
- In my bedroom?
- Is that real fur?
293
00:10:30,318 --> 00:10:32,368
Chinchilla is chinchilla.
294
00:10:32,403 --> 00:10:34,287
So, yes.
295
00:10:34,322 --> 00:10:36,456
Okay, so we're going to take care of that.
296
00:10:36,491 --> 00:10:38,074
We're going to take care of that,
297
00:10:38,076 --> 00:10:39,959
because he's found that
as sort of his spot.
298
00:10:39,994 --> 00:10:41,828
Maybe train him when he can speak.
299
00:10:41,880 --> 00:10:43,746
Exactly. I mean, hopefully...
300
00:10:43,748 --> 00:10:45,331
And then you'll know
exactly what he wants and...
301
00:10:45,383 --> 00:10:47,300
but thank you, anyway.
This has worked out great.
302
00:10:47,335 --> 00:10:49,218
I'm happy you're enjoying it.
303
00:10:49,254 --> 00:10:50,503
- Thank you.
- Then you can come, you know,
304
00:10:50,555 --> 00:10:51,971
as often as you like, and, you know.
305
00:10:52,006 --> 00:10:54,757
Oh, thank you. We... we found a corner
306
00:10:54,759 --> 00:10:56,976
in Greenpoint, Brooklyn, which is...
307
00:10:57,011 --> 00:10:59,345
they call Little Edinburgh,
and it's scottish.
308
00:10:59,397 --> 00:11:01,097
It's really not a whole block. Uhhuh.
309
00:11:01,099 --> 00:11:03,399
It's like... it's like two storefronts...
310
00:11:03,434 --> 00:11:05,318
- Right.
- And this family.
311
00:11:05,353 --> 00:11:06,769
But they call it Little Edinburgh,
312
00:11:06,771 --> 00:11:08,938
and we've got Angus playing there...
313
00:11:08,940 --> 00:11:10,239
Right. Exactly.
314
00:11:10,275 --> 00:11:12,241
And sort of learning the Scottish ways.
315
00:11:12,277 --> 00:11:14,107
Right, he's not scottish.
316
00:11:14,127 --> 00:11:16,279
But... but Austen Clarke is,
317
00:11:16,281 --> 00:11:19,916
and we really want him to
feel what his benefactor
318
00:11:19,951 --> 00:11:21,417
- sort of was.
- All right, well, don't forget,
319
00:11:21,452 --> 00:11:25,421
you know,
the other parts of his actual heritage.
320
00:11:25,456 --> 00:11:26,956
Me? Sure, sure.
321
00:11:27,008 --> 00:11:28,758
- You and Gina.
- We want you to be aunt Fiona,
322
00:11:28,793 --> 00:11:30,426
and we talk about you all the time.
323
00:11:30,461 --> 00:11:32,261
I don't think I should be Aunt Fiona,
though.
324
00:11:32,297 --> 00:11:33,462
"Awnt"... "Awnt" Fiona, do you prefer that?
325
00:11:33,515 --> 00:11:35,014
- No.
- I know a lot of people
326
00:11:35,049 --> 00:11:36,349
- like that better.
- Some do, I don't.
327
00:11:36,384 --> 00:11:38,995
- He can call me Mrs. Wallice.
- Bubbie... I love that.
328
00:11:39,015 --> 00:11:40,803
I'm not a Bubbie.
329
00:11:40,805 --> 00:11:42,772
Anyway, Angus feels so at home in New York.
330
00:11:42,807 --> 00:11:44,357
It's like he took to it.
331
00:11:44,392 --> 00:11:46,192
Wonderful. So maybe you need to go there
332
00:11:46,227 --> 00:11:48,895
every month so he can
get the most out of it.
333
00:11:48,947 --> 00:11:51,814
Well, I would love that, I mean,
if it was okay with you.
334
00:11:51,866 --> 00:11:54,911
Oh, I have an idea that I just got.
335
00:11:54,931 --> 00:11:55,868
Yeah?
336
00:11:55,904 --> 00:11:58,538
Why don't you cover the
expenses in New York,
337
00:11:58,573 --> 00:12:01,824
and we can have the trust cover that.
338
00:12:01,876 --> 00:12:03,292
- Why don't I email you...
- That's better.
339
00:12:03,328 --> 00:12:04,827
this document that's called
340
00:12:04,829 --> 00:12:07,496
"Angus New York Manhattan Expenses"?
341
00:12:07,498 --> 00:12:08,881
- Thank you, thank you.
- Yeah.
342
00:12:08,917 --> 00:12:10,716
Because everything does have to be
343
00:12:10,752 --> 00:12:12,335
- an Angus-related expense.
- Right.
344
00:12:12,387 --> 00:12:14,003
- And this would be...
- well, this one's called...
345
00:12:14,005 --> 00:12:16,005
You got it. Did you get it? Do you see?
346
00:12:16,057 --> 00:12:18,057
- "Angus Manhattan Expenses."
- Oh, you did it already.
347
00:12:18,092 --> 00:12:19,892
Great. In that case,
348
00:12:19,928 --> 00:12:21,344
I would love to start using
the apartment right away,
349
00:12:21,396 --> 00:12:23,179
but if you need to use it,
350
00:12:23,181 --> 00:12:26,482
if it's okay,
you can give it a couple of weeks.
351
00:12:26,517 --> 00:12:27,900
- Oh?
- The suede wallpaper
352
00:12:27,936 --> 00:12:29,518
in the guest bathroom...
353
00:12:29,520 --> 00:12:32,071
that unfortunately was white,
354
00:12:32,106 --> 00:12:35,858
and Angus likes to play with his own
"defeca."
355
00:12:35,910 --> 00:12:38,995
He... he mushes it, and he...
is it called "defeca"?
356
00:12:39,030 --> 00:12:41,664
Well, that's what our...
our potty-training specialist...
357
00:12:41,699 --> 00:12:42,999
- Oh.
- The potty-whisperer calls it.
358
00:12:43,034 --> 00:12:44,867
- I call it "feces."
- Feces, yeah,
359
00:12:44,919 --> 00:12:46,335
well, we're cleaning it up,
360
00:12:46,371 --> 00:12:49,255
so you're going to want
to either wait and...
361
00:12:49,290 --> 00:12:51,424
- Till it's replaced.
- Yeah, and light a candle...
362
00:12:51,459 --> 00:12:53,125
It's expen...
363
00:12:53,177 --> 00:12:55,294
Always.
364
00:12:59,584 --> 00:13:01,884
- Hello, Fiona.
- Hello, Steve.
365
00:13:01,936 --> 00:13:03,519
Hello. How are you?
366
00:13:03,554 --> 00:13:05,855
I'm fine.
You don't seem to be doing as well.
367
00:13:05,890 --> 00:13:07,890
I'm not doing very good at all today.
368
00:13:07,892 --> 00:13:10,359
Thank you for asking.
Aren't you a cunning one?
369
00:13:10,395 --> 00:13:11,310
- I?
- Aren't you
370
00:13:11,362 --> 00:13:12,979
a clever little fox?
371
00:13:13,031 --> 00:13:14,981
- I...
- A sly little shark.
372
00:13:15,033 --> 00:13:16,899
Well, I really don't know
what you're talking about.
373
00:13:16,951 --> 00:13:18,701
- We had a lovely lunch.
- Oh, yeah. No, it was great.
374
00:13:18,736 --> 00:13:20,453
- Took you through exercises...
- Yeah.
375
00:13:20,488 --> 00:13:22,238
- Which you did beautifully...
- Oh, I did all the exercises.
376
00:13:22,290 --> 00:13:23,873
- Sure.
- Sending portions back.
377
00:13:23,908 --> 00:13:25,458
I didn't think the mango
chutney was watery,
378
00:13:25,493 --> 00:13:26,993
but I sent it back anyways.
379
00:13:27,045 --> 00:13:28,160
Say it's watery.
380
00:13:28,212 --> 00:13:29,629
Say the mango chutney's watery.
381
00:13:29,664 --> 00:13:32,081
I did that. I tried bone marrow.
382
00:13:32,083 --> 00:13:35,418
I paid the bill without looking
at the credit card receipt.
383
00:13:35,420 --> 00:13:37,086
- I-I did all these things.
- Yes.
384
00:13:37,088 --> 00:13:39,338
- I felt fantastic, Fiona.
- That's great.
385
00:13:39,390 --> 00:13:40,923
I felt empowered.
386
00:13:40,975 --> 00:13:43,009
I felt...
387
00:13:43,061 --> 00:13:44,260
wonderful.
388
00:13:44,262 --> 00:13:46,429
And then... and then I come home,
389
00:13:46,431 --> 00:13:48,314
and I open up the envelope that you said,
"do not open.
390
00:13:48,349 --> 00:13:50,099
"Do not open the sealed envelope
391
00:13:50,101 --> 00:13:51,400
- until you come home."
- Right.
392
00:13:51,436 --> 00:13:53,069
And I'm very excited.
393
00:13:53,104 --> 00:13:56,439
"Well,
what new task have you sent me off to?"
394
00:13:56,441 --> 00:13:58,274
- Yes.
- What is this?
395
00:13:58,276 --> 00:14:00,276
That's a web therapy proposal...
396
00:14:00,278 --> 00:14:01,827
- That's exactly what it is.
- To invest in.
397
00:14:01,863 --> 00:14:03,162
- That's exactly what it is.
- Why would...
398
00:14:03,197 --> 00:14:06,032
with a little "sign here" stickie.
399
00:14:06,084 --> 00:14:08,501
- Yes, why would that anger you?
- "Initial here."
400
00:14:08,536 --> 00:14:10,286
Becau... you don't understand.
401
00:14:10,288 --> 00:14:12,204
This is exactly what
I've been bombarded with,
402
00:14:12,256 --> 00:14:14,090
and then you throw it at me. You... this...
403
00:14:14,125 --> 00:14:17,009
I cannot tell you how angry
I am with you right now.
404
00:14:17,045 --> 00:14:19,428
But I helped you so much
with the other proposals.
405
00:14:19,464 --> 00:14:20,796
I threw out all of them...
406
00:14:20,798 --> 00:14:22,631
- All of them.
- Because they were all stupid.
407
00:14:22,633 --> 00:14:24,550
Well, that one, I'm sort of looking at.
408
00:14:24,602 --> 00:14:26,469
- But all of the other ones...
- The dogperfume one?
409
00:14:26,521 --> 00:14:28,637
- I don't think it's a good idea.
- I don't agree with you.
410
00:14:28,639 --> 00:14:31,607
Anyway,
I'm still not clear on why you're angry
411
00:14:31,642 --> 00:14:33,859
after I helped you so much.
412
00:14:33,895 --> 00:14:38,147
And then I sent you this last... last task.
413
00:14:38,149 --> 00:14:40,316
I know. No, you know...
414
00:14:40,368 --> 00:14:41,450
This was a task?
415
00:14:41,486 --> 00:14:43,152
Yes, it was a test.
416
00:14:43,154 --> 00:14:45,488
Of course it was a test.
417
00:14:45,540 --> 00:14:48,491
Oh, my gosh. You got me. I was...
418
00:14:48,543 --> 00:14:51,410
- I am so sorry.
- I'm not really going to...
419
00:14:51,462 --> 00:14:52,878
- Oh.
- Solicit web therapy
420
00:14:52,914 --> 00:14:54,880
however beneficial to the world it may be
421
00:14:54,916 --> 00:14:56,632
- or an excellent investment.
- You got me.
422
00:14:56,667 --> 00:14:58,250
- No, I wouldn't...
- No.
423
00:14:58,302 --> 00:14:59,719
- Do that.
- And I knew... I knew...
424
00:14:59,754 --> 00:15:01,137
see, and I knew that you wouldn't,
425
00:15:01,172 --> 00:15:02,588
and I was like, "don't be crazy."
426
00:15:02,640 --> 00:15:04,673
No, if you don't want to invest in it,
427
00:15:04,675 --> 00:15:06,175
- then of course don't.
- No, of course...
428
00:15:06,227 --> 00:15:09,061
- Well, that's...
- If you don't want to.
429
00:15:09,097 --> 00:15:10,513
- I don't.
- Okay.
430
00:15:10,565 --> 00:15:11,731
- Yeah.
- Then don't.
431
00:15:11,766 --> 00:15:13,315
No, but that... that... you got me.
432
00:15:13,351 --> 00:15:15,351
And you'll invest in the perfume loser.
433
00:15:15,403 --> 00:15:17,186
Well, yet to be determined, but, yeah.
434
00:15:17,238 --> 00:15:19,438
Well, good.
All right, so I'm so glad that we're okay.
435
00:15:19,490 --> 00:15:21,023
This is great. No, we're fine.
436
00:15:21,025 --> 00:15:22,358
And I'm here whenever you need me.
437
00:15:22,410 --> 00:15:24,026
Oh, thank you.
438
00:15:24,028 --> 00:15:25,745
I'm going to go and take
care of other people.
439
00:15:25,780 --> 00:15:28,080
And I do appreciate all the
work you've done for me.
440
00:15:28,116 --> 00:15:29,615
But I'm better now,
441
00:15:29,667 --> 00:15:31,367
and I think that, you know,
I've really learned
442
00:15:31,369 --> 00:15:33,335
- how to stand up for myself...
- Yes.
443
00:15:33,371 --> 00:15:34,670
And also, I need to start
444
00:15:34,705 --> 00:15:36,672
looking at these things on my own.
445
00:15:36,707 --> 00:15:38,040
You know, you helped me greatly,
446
00:15:38,092 --> 00:15:40,092
- but, you know, I need to...
- Good. Okay.
447
00:15:40,128 --> 00:15:42,011
Like, there's this bookstore Internet cafe
448
00:15:42,046 --> 00:15:43,629
Counseling Skype thing... What?
449
00:15:43,681 --> 00:15:45,548
- That I want to look at.
- You said that very quickly.
450
00:15:45,550 --> 00:15:47,767
- There's this toe workout.
- Wait. What was that other one?
451
00:15:47,802 --> 00:15:49,552
You said it very quickly. The toe workout?
452
00:15:49,604 --> 00:15:51,804
No. That's silly.
453
00:15:51,856 --> 00:15:54,440
The... what did you say?
An Internet cafe book what?
454
00:15:54,475 --> 00:15:56,609
Yes, the Counseling Skype Center.
455
00:15:56,644 --> 00:15:58,527
- Counseling?
- Yeah, it's a...
456
00:15:58,563 --> 00:16:00,279
- Therapy counseling?
- Nah, it doesn't look good.
457
00:16:00,314 --> 00:16:01,781
Yeah, it's like a therapist.
458
00:16:01,816 --> 00:16:03,566
It's like you go into a cafe,
an Internet cafe,
459
00:16:03,618 --> 00:16:07,119
and you can meet with someone
on a computer and do counseling.
460
00:16:07,155 --> 00:16:09,238
It seems kind of out there for me, but...
461
00:16:09,290 --> 00:16:11,323
Well, I don't know. It seems... who...
462
00:16:11,375 --> 00:16:12,741
who sent that one to you?
463
00:16:12,743 --> 00:16:14,543
- It's a Starbucks...
- What?
464
00:16:14,579 --> 00:16:16,078
And Barnes & Noble Partnership.
465
00:16:16,080 --> 00:16:18,414
But those are two very
successful organizations.
466
00:16:18,466 --> 00:16:20,416
- Don't I know it?
- And they're going to get
467
00:16:20,468 --> 00:16:22,585
together to provide
therapy in a cafe setting?
468
00:16:22,637 --> 00:16:24,170
You know, you sit down,
469
00:16:24,222 --> 00:16:26,138
and you go into, like,
a little voting booth-type thing,
470
00:16:26,174 --> 00:16:27,890
- and you have a bagel and...
- It feels private.
471
00:16:27,925 --> 00:16:29,675
That's wonderful.
And they'll have baked goods?
472
00:16:29,727 --> 00:16:32,428
- Yeah.
- Maybe more than just bagels.
473
00:16:32,430 --> 00:16:33,646
Yeah, I mean, the idea sounds great,
474
00:16:33,681 --> 00:16:35,097
but, you know, it's all very...
475
00:16:35,149 --> 00:16:36,899
it's very grassroots at this point.
476
00:16:36,934 --> 00:16:38,651
- You know what I mean.
- I do. No, it sounds wonderful.
477
00:16:38,686 --> 00:16:40,402
Well, this is something...
478
00:16:40,438 --> 00:16:41,854
they don't even have a
therapist on board yet.
479
00:16:41,906 --> 00:16:43,489
It just seems like they really don't know
480
00:16:43,524 --> 00:16:45,241
what they're doing with this at this point,
so...
481
00:16:45,276 --> 00:16:46,442
Mm-hmm. I have to say I think
482
00:16:46,494 --> 00:16:48,194
that Starbucks and Barnes & Noble
483
00:16:48,246 --> 00:16:50,412
are people that you want
to be in business with
484
00:16:50,448 --> 00:16:52,331
because they're very successful,
485
00:16:52,366 --> 00:16:54,783
and I personally would invest in this.
486
00:16:54,785 --> 00:16:57,920
In fact,
I personally am going to invest in this,
487
00:16:57,955 --> 00:17:00,122
if you don't mind sending it along to me.
488
00:17:00,174 --> 00:17:02,625
- How much are they asking for?
- They're-they're asking for...
489
00:17:02,627 --> 00:17:05,177
I mean, it... it's a lot.
It's a $2 million block...
490
00:17:05,213 --> 00:17:06,679
- Oh.
- For each... you know, so...
491
00:17:06,714 --> 00:17:08,380
- That is a lot.
- It's a lot of money.
492
00:17:08,432 --> 00:17:10,466
- And it's... it's...
- Well, not for you, it's not.
493
00:17:10,468 --> 00:17:11,634
Well, no, no.
494
00:17:11,636 --> 00:17:13,135
And I... look, you know,
495
00:17:13,187 --> 00:17:15,221
I'll put my money where my mouth is, okay?
496
00:17:15,273 --> 00:17:18,724
- I will invest $50,000.
- Oh, wow.
497
00:17:18,776 --> 00:17:20,943
And you can invest the $1.95 million,
498
00:17:20,978 --> 00:17:23,529
and we can be equal partners in this.
499
00:17:23,564 --> 00:17:26,282
Right, and how... and so that would...
500
00:17:26,317 --> 00:17:28,784
and... and we would just make
all these decisions togeth...
501
00:17:28,819 --> 00:17:31,487
Well, that... that actually is...
it sounds intriguing.
502
00:17:31,489 --> 00:17:33,239
Very exciting. I'll write you a check.
503
00:17:33,291 --> 00:17:34,823
I'll write you a check right now.
504
00:17:34,825 --> 00:17:37,076
Oh, you... actually, it needs to be a...
505
00:17:37,128 --> 00:17:38,377
it needs to be a cashier's check.
506
00:17:38,412 --> 00:17:40,296
- Oh.
- Yeah, it's something
507
00:17:40,331 --> 00:17:42,665
that the banks are now doing.
I mean, you must know.
508
00:17:42,667 --> 00:17:45,417
I mean, it's that whole
standard investment policy...
509
00:17:45,469 --> 00:17:46,919
it's policy number 14.
510
00:17:46,971 --> 00:17:49,471
- Really? Oh, that's new.
- Yeah, the new policy.
511
00:17:49,507 --> 00:17:51,423
See, I haven't been in this in a while,
I'm embarrassed to say.
512
00:17:51,475 --> 00:17:52,925
Yeah, it's all changed.
A whole turnover thing.
513
00:17:52,977 --> 00:17:54,476
Maybe it's a New York thing too.
514
00:17:54,512 --> 00:17:56,095
It's a New York thing,
and it is just in new...
515
00:17:56,147 --> 00:17:57,846
'cause it's not happening in Philadelphia.
516
00:17:57,848 --> 00:17:59,315
No, it's... it's just New York.
517
00:17:59,350 --> 00:18:01,350
New York and, I think, like, Wisconsin,
518
00:18:01,352 --> 00:18:04,153
but it's... it's... it's policy 14.
It's been on all the... yeah.
519
00:18:04,188 --> 00:18:06,155
All right, so a cashier's check to?
520
00:18:06,190 --> 00:18:08,357
Yes, and you're going to make it out to...
521
00:18:08,409 --> 00:18:10,192
well, I actually set up the trust
522
00:18:10,194 --> 00:18:11,610
like you had suggested, so, yeah.
523
00:18:11,662 --> 00:18:13,612
Oh, very good. What's it called?
524
00:18:13,664 --> 00:18:14,830
It's... it's called
525
00:18:14,865 --> 00:18:19,251
Capital Asset Security Holdings.
526
00:18:19,287 --> 00:18:21,203
That's a long name.
527
00:18:21,255 --> 00:18:22,838
Yeah, yeah, so you...
you could just abbreviate it.
528
00:18:22,873 --> 00:18:24,340
Just the initials are all right?
529
00:18:24,375 --> 00:18:25,624
- Yeah, that's fine.
- Okay.
530
00:18:25,676 --> 00:18:27,126
- Capital Assets Security...
- Holding.
531
00:18:27,178 --> 00:18:28,711
- Holding, okay.
- Mm-hmm.
532
00:18:28,713 --> 00:18:31,931
That says "cash."
Did you think that through?
533
00:18:31,966 --> 00:18:35,050
- You know, I-I saw that.
- Anyone can...
534
00:18:35,102 --> 00:18:36,635
I-I'm probably going to end up changing it.
535
00:18:36,687 --> 00:18:38,971
You change it now.
536
00:18:39,023 --> 00:18:41,890
I can't... I'm not sending you
a cashier's check for cash.
537
00:18:41,892 --> 00:18:45,194
Well, I-I actually... I-I understand.
538
00:18:45,229 --> 00:18:47,613
Well,
I have another trust as well that I set up.
539
00:18:47,648 --> 00:18:49,732
- Oh, okay, very smart.
- Well, yeah.
540
00:18:49,784 --> 00:18:51,567
Two, so you can have your assets scattered.
541
00:18:51,569 --> 00:18:53,402
- That's very smart.
- Exactly. Exactly.
542
00:18:53,404 --> 00:18:54,870
Okay, what's this one called?
543
00:18:54,905 --> 00:18:58,490
So that one you can make
it out to Joe Drake.
544
00:18:58,542 --> 00:18:59,908
Okay, who's that?
545
00:18:59,961 --> 00:19:01,410
You know, it was just something fu...
546
00:19:01,412 --> 00:19:03,245
I-I like ducks, and so...
547
00:19:03,297 --> 00:19:05,331
- Oh, Drake is a duck.
- Yeah.
548
00:19:05,383 --> 00:19:06,999
- Oh, that's funny.
- Isn't that fun?
549
00:19:07,051 --> 00:19:09,335
Part of the aquatic theme
that you love so well.
550
00:19:09,387 --> 00:19:10,970
Yeah. I do. I do. I love it.
551
00:19:11,005 --> 00:19:12,588
- Joe "everyman's name."
- And every...
552
00:19:12,640 --> 00:19:16,091
like a-a, you know, the...
the plumber Joe, and... yeah.
553
00:19:16,143 --> 00:19:18,310
- Joe the plumber.
- Yeah, well, whatever.
554
00:19:23,567 --> 00:19:26,602
Hello. Hi. You must be Jeb Masters.
555
00:19:26,654 --> 00:19:28,771
- I am. Hi.
- I'm Dr. Fiona Wallice.
556
00:19:28,823 --> 00:19:31,273
- It's lovely to meet you.
- Nice to meet you as well.
557
00:19:31,325 --> 00:19:33,909
Look at your view.
You're in Manhattan, so am I.
558
00:19:33,944 --> 00:19:35,527
Thank you. Yeah, downtown.
559
00:19:35,579 --> 00:19:37,946
So am I. I'm in a penthouse uptown, yeah.
560
00:19:37,948 --> 00:19:40,366
- Oh, that's impressive.
- Yes.
561
00:19:40,418 --> 00:19:42,451
I guess I should just
get right to the point.
562
00:19:42,503 --> 00:19:43,836
- Yeah.
- I'm having some trouble
563
00:19:43,871 --> 00:19:46,755
- with the woman in my life...
- Oh.
564
00:19:46,791 --> 00:19:50,259
And my job. They're not... they're not...
565
00:19:50,294 --> 00:19:51,877
compatible?
Going together.
566
00:19:51,929 --> 00:19:53,796
What is it?
It's too much time away from her
567
00:19:53,798 --> 00:19:55,514
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
568
00:19:55,549 --> 00:19:57,299
- Because you're ambitious.
- No, we met through my job.
569
00:19:57,351 --> 00:19:59,768
- It's just that she's...
- Obviously, you do very well.
570
00:19:59,804 --> 00:20:01,270
- Uh, yeah.
- And she must, you know,
571
00:20:01,305 --> 00:20:03,856
enjoy the creature comforts you provide.
572
00:20:03,891 --> 00:20:05,524
No, no, no. Yes, that part of it...
573
00:20:05,559 --> 00:20:07,443
What would she like for you to do...
574
00:20:07,478 --> 00:20:10,362
- quit and live as a pauper?
- No, I certainly can't do that.
575
00:20:10,398 --> 00:20:12,281
- Right.
- I'm good at it.
576
00:20:12,316 --> 00:20:14,233
It's kind of the only thing I'm good at.
577
00:20:14,285 --> 00:20:16,985
- Right, oh...
- Well, I mean, I can cook.
578
00:20:16,987 --> 00:20:19,621
- Uh-huh.
- I can paint.
579
00:20:19,657 --> 00:20:21,707
- But everyone can do that.
- Oh, well, not really.
580
00:20:21,742 --> 00:20:25,327
- No, it's super easy, but...
- Can I ask what your job is?
581
00:20:25,329 --> 00:20:27,579
- Maybe I could understand?
- I... uh, yeah.
582
00:20:27,631 --> 00:20:29,998
It's, um... you know, it's sort of
583
00:20:30,000 --> 00:20:32,751
it's tangentially related
to the service industry.
584
00:20:32,803 --> 00:20:34,303
Mostly I'm a voice actor.
585
00:20:34,338 --> 00:20:35,888
- Is she an actress?
- No.
586
00:20:35,923 --> 00:20:39,591
- Oh, that's good, yeah.
- No, but she was a client.
587
00:20:39,643 --> 00:20:41,844
And what I do... specifically, what I do...
588
00:20:41,846 --> 00:20:45,264
I run a company called Absolute Last Call.
589
00:20:45,316 --> 00:20:46,982
And it's probably what you're thinking,
590
00:20:47,017 --> 00:20:48,734
which is a...
591
00:20:48,769 --> 00:20:52,821
intimate erotic conversations
592
00:20:52,857 --> 00:20:56,658
with, um, older...
593
00:20:56,694 --> 00:21:00,079
geriatric...
594
00:21:00,114 --> 00:21:02,448
elderly women.
595
00:21:02,500 --> 00:21:04,166
That's not at all what I thought it was.
596
00:21:04,201 --> 00:21:05,868
Just women. I don't... I don't do men.
597
00:21:05,870 --> 00:21:08,837
That's a different guy,
who's a lovely guy... no judgment.
598
00:21:08,873 --> 00:21:10,706
There is someone who does that?
599
00:21:10,758 --> 00:21:11,840
- Steve.
- Ooh.
600
00:21:11,876 --> 00:21:13,342
I've known him for years.
601
00:21:13,377 --> 00:21:14,877
Don't get me wrong. It's just not my thing.
602
00:21:14,879 --> 00:21:16,378
And I'm not good at it. I'm good at this.
603
00:21:16,430 --> 00:21:17,796
- I'm good at what I do.
- Right. Right.
604
00:21:17,848 --> 00:21:19,715
And I'm physically invested in it.
605
00:21:19,767 --> 00:21:22,718
I get, for want of a better word, aroused.
606
00:21:22,770 --> 00:21:24,636
- Oh, no.
- Oh, yes.
607
00:21:24,688 --> 00:21:27,606
Could I just...
I'm curious of the kind of things
608
00:21:27,641 --> 00:21:31,059
that an elderly woman would want to hear.
609
00:21:31,112 --> 00:21:34,363
You can talk about maybe
movie stars from the '20s.
610
00:21:34,398 --> 00:21:37,116
- You can talk about, uh...
- That's 90 years ago.
611
00:21:37,151 --> 00:21:39,952
- Yeah, yeah, okay, right.
- Yeah, I mean, you can talk
612
00:21:39,987 --> 00:21:43,455
about, you know, coming home from the war.
613
00:21:43,491 --> 00:21:45,290
You can talk about, uh, you know...
614
00:21:45,326 --> 00:21:46,875
- Which war?
- specifically... exactly.
615
00:21:46,911 --> 00:21:48,660
- The civil war?
- And then you can move
616
00:21:48,712 --> 00:21:51,130
into, like, the modern, the now.
617
00:21:51,165 --> 00:21:53,165
"Let me get that walker for you."
618
00:21:53,217 --> 00:21:55,884
"What if I open that door?" You know?
619
00:21:55,920 --> 00:21:57,085
Oh, and that's what they want to hear?
620
00:21:57,087 --> 00:21:58,504
Are you hungry? It's 4:00.
621
00:21:58,556 --> 00:21:59,972
Let's go get some dinner.
622
00:22:00,007 --> 00:22:01,473
- You know what I'm saying?
- Right.
623
00:22:01,509 --> 00:22:04,593
It can get real specific
once you get into the now,
624
00:22:04,595 --> 00:22:06,562
because that's the
person you're talking to.
625
00:22:06,597 --> 00:22:09,598
You're trying to stimulate the young woman,
626
00:22:09,600 --> 00:22:11,600
but you're talking to the older woman.
627
00:22:11,652 --> 00:22:14,937
- What? Is it raunchy or...
- It can be.
628
00:22:14,989 --> 00:22:17,606
- It's phone sex?
- It can be.
629
00:22:17,658 --> 00:22:18,907
You're a rare commodity.
630
00:22:18,943 --> 00:22:20,442
- I enjoy it.
- Right.
631
00:22:20,444 --> 00:22:22,444
It's something I-I-I look forward to,
in fact.
632
00:22:22,496 --> 00:22:25,497
Right. Is it... is it, though, really?
633
00:22:25,533 --> 00:22:28,534
Because now I'm wondering...
perhaps you do have an issue
634
00:22:28,586 --> 00:22:31,086
with the fact that your girlfriend
635
00:22:31,121 --> 00:22:33,422
doesn't like your work.
636
00:22:33,457 --> 00:22:38,126
But is it that your
girlfriend is 100 years old,
637
00:22:38,128 --> 00:22:40,262
and you don't like your girlfriend?
638
00:22:40,297 --> 00:22:43,098
'Cause you're a somewhat attractive man,
you know?
639
00:22:43,133 --> 00:22:44,766
- That's kind of you to say.
- Well...
640
00:22:44,802 --> 00:22:48,520
And, um, I just wonder if
that's not the issue. I mean...
641
00:22:48,556 --> 00:22:50,856
Well, I mean, no, my girlfriend is,
642
00:22:50,891 --> 00:22:52,975
uh, older than me.
643
00:22:53,027 --> 00:22:57,145
- Well, yes.
- Uh, she's... she's in her 70s...
644
00:22:57,198 --> 00:23:00,566
Uh, and funny and fun
645
00:23:00,618 --> 00:23:02,401
and, uh...
646
00:23:02,453 --> 00:23:04,653
- bright and smart.
- And old.
647
00:23:04,705 --> 00:23:07,155
And I think...
I think the sticking point is that
648
00:23:07,208 --> 00:23:09,825
she doesn't want to share me anymore.
649
00:23:09,827 --> 00:23:11,543
Oh, you think that's what it is?
650
00:23:11,579 --> 00:23:14,997
Not physically,
but even emotionally, aurally,
651
00:23:14,999 --> 00:23:16,498
- uh, in...
- Verbally.
652
00:23:16,500 --> 00:23:18,000
- Verbally.
- Aurally, right.
653
00:23:18,002 --> 00:23:21,169
- Well, aurally, to hear.
- Right, right, okay.
654
00:23:21,171 --> 00:23:23,338
Um, it's... it's...
655
00:23:23,340 --> 00:23:26,058
I'm just trying to keep down my lunch.
656
00:23:26,093 --> 00:23:27,809
- Oh, well, honestly...
- I'm sorry.
657
00:23:27,845 --> 00:23:30,679
- That was unkind and insensitive.
- Well, but I do understand.
658
00:23:30,731 --> 00:23:32,681
A lot of people don't understand it.
659
00:23:32,683 --> 00:23:34,316
Yeah, I'm having trouble, I have to say.
660
00:23:34,351 --> 00:23:35,767
I'm telling you,
if you could see us together,
661
00:23:35,819 --> 00:23:37,269
you would totally get it.
662
00:23:37,321 --> 00:23:39,021
Right. Okay, you know what?
I want to help you.
663
00:23:39,073 --> 00:23:40,939
I'm going to take you on.
664
00:23:40,991 --> 00:23:42,691
You didn't know this was
sort of an audition to see
665
00:23:42,743 --> 00:23:44,526
- if I can help you or I can't.
- I honestly didn't.
666
00:23:44,578 --> 00:23:47,079
But I think I can help you,
and I'd like to try.
667
00:23:47,114 --> 00:23:49,915
Thank you, um,
so I'd love to figure out a time
668
00:23:49,950 --> 00:23:51,533
- where we can set a regular...
- Okay.
669
00:23:51,535 --> 00:23:53,285
[Cell phone vibrating]
a regular situation.
670
00:23:53,337 --> 00:23:54,620
Hold on. I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry.
671
00:23:54,672 --> 00:23:56,171
- No problem.
- I'm so sorry.
672
00:23:56,206 --> 00:23:58,090
- I have to take this.
- Do you mind if I watch?
673
00:23:58,125 --> 00:23:59,841
Please do, please do, yes.
674
00:23:59,877 --> 00:24:01,760
And then I'll know and maybe
understand what you do.
675
00:24:01,795 --> 00:24:02,711
Please do.
676
00:24:02,763 --> 00:24:04,546
Agatha?
677
00:24:04,598 --> 00:24:07,015
Well, yes.
678
00:24:07,051 --> 00:24:09,587
How are you, my dear?
679
00:24:11,221 --> 00:24:13,458
And what was it?
680
00:24:14,058 --> 00:24:16,337
Applesauce.
681
00:24:16,944 --> 00:24:19,778
That's impressive.
Did you eat the whole thing?
682
00:24:21,899 --> 00:24:24,956
And what are we wearing?
683
00:24:25,569 --> 00:24:27,369
Well, let me just tell you...
684
00:24:27,404 --> 00:24:30,155
and I know you don't have a lot of time...
685
00:24:30,207 --> 00:24:34,102
but if I was there right now...
686
00:24:34,411 --> 00:24:37,746
that pink housecoat would not be on.
687
00:24:37,798 --> 00:24:39,881
It would be off...
688
00:24:39,917 --> 00:24:42,834
under the bed.
689
00:24:42,886 --> 00:24:45,137
I'd take your wig off.
690
00:24:48,225 --> 00:24:51,760
And I think you remember what we'd do.
691
00:24:52,318 --> 00:24:54,146
Okay?
692
00:24:54,181 --> 00:24:57,683
So why don't you think about that?
693
00:24:57,735 --> 00:24:59,518
Are you wet?
694
00:25:01,855 --> 00:25:03,905
Was it an accident?
695
00:25:03,941 --> 00:25:06,089
Okay.
696
00:25:06,777 --> 00:25:09,117
I'll talk to you tomorrow.
697
00:25:09,747 --> 00:25:11,279
Yeah. I'll just... I'll bill...
698
00:25:11,281 --> 00:25:14,032
I'll bill Jeremy.
699
00:25:14,084 --> 00:25:16,084
Okay. Good night, sweetheart.
700
00:25:16,120 --> 00:25:18,370
- Sorry. I had to...
- That's all right.
701
00:25:18,422 --> 00:25:20,872
Yeah, like I said,
this is kind of rush hour for me, so...
702
00:25:20,924 --> 00:25:22,290
Right. Did she have an accident?
703
00:25:22,343 --> 00:25:24,259
- Was it an accident?
- Oh, no.
704
00:25:24,294 --> 00:25:26,545
- Oh.
- It was on purpose.
705
00:25:26,597 --> 00:25:28,096
Right. No, yeah, you do...
706
00:25:28,132 --> 00:25:31,216
- you do have a very sexy voice.
- It is what I do...
707
00:25:31,268 --> 00:25:32,634
- Again.
- I started to get, like,
708
00:25:32,636 --> 00:25:34,302
"Oh, I get it." [Laughs]
709
00:25:34,355 --> 00:25:36,054
You know, and then you said, "housecoat,"
710
00:25:36,106 --> 00:25:37,556
and I remembered who you were talking to.
711
00:25:37,608 --> 00:25:39,141
Oh, well, thank you. [Cell phone vibrating]
712
00:25:39,143 --> 00:25:40,726
Hold on, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.
713
00:25:40,778 --> 00:25:42,144
- No problem.
- It's a text.
714
00:25:42,146 --> 00:25:45,614
I was supposed to, um...
715
00:25:45,649 --> 00:25:48,316
[Sighs] I was supposed to go on a date...
716
00:25:48,318 --> 00:25:50,068
- Tomorrow.
- Oh, the girlfriend.
717
00:25:50,120 --> 00:25:54,156
And, uh,
we were supposed to go out tomorrow night.
718
00:25:54,158 --> 00:25:55,957
- Uh...
- But she died?
719
00:25:55,993 --> 00:25:56,825
to a concert.
No, no, no.
720
00:25:56,877 --> 00:25:58,160
Oh.
721
00:25:58,212 --> 00:26:01,129
- Well.
- And see Barry Manilow,
722
00:26:01,165 --> 00:26:03,665
- who is one of her favorites.
- Yes, oh.
723
00:26:03,667 --> 00:26:05,250
And, uh, she just canceled on it,
724
00:26:05,302 --> 00:26:06,752
and I don't know if
that has to do with this
725
00:26:06,804 --> 00:26:08,220
or if that has to do with something else...
726
00:26:08,255 --> 00:26:09,971
So you have a free ticket.
727
00:26:10,007 --> 00:26:11,840
- Well, I do, I guess.
- Yeah, I love Barry Manilow.
728
00:26:11,842 --> 00:26:14,342
I'll probably just not go, but...
729
00:26:14,344 --> 00:26:17,179
No, I love him.
730
00:26:17,231 --> 00:26:19,431
- Well, uh...
- I'm a little young for you.
731
00:26:19,483 --> 00:26:21,650
I don't want you to be
embarrassed to be seen with me.
732
00:26:21,685 --> 00:26:23,435
Well, no, it certainly wouldn't be that.
733
00:26:23,487 --> 00:26:25,437
It would be completely platonic,
obviously, but if you'd like...
734
00:26:25,489 --> 00:26:26,688
- I just heard that, "well"...
- to go...
735
00:26:26,690 --> 00:26:28,443
Yes, well, thank you. I would.
736
00:26:33,914 --> 00:26:36,248
If you could just hold on for...
737
00:26:36,283 --> 00:26:39,000
- How do I have a fly here?
- [Laughs]
738
00:26:39,036 --> 00:26:41,953
I think I have, uh,
the same one in my house.
739
00:26:42,005 --> 00:26:44,172
[Laughter]
740
00:26:46,877 --> 00:26:49,428
You're kind of in that weird spot,
like you're not...
741
00:26:49,463 --> 00:26:51,880
young enough to be, like,
attractive in that way.
742
00:26:51,932 --> 00:26:53,465
And you're definitely not old enough,
743
00:26:53,517 --> 00:26:55,100
so you're, like,
in that weird middle place...
744
00:26:55,135 --> 00:26:58,103
- Uh-huh.
- Uh, that doesn't really...
745
00:27:00,441 --> 00:27:02,974
[Laughing]
746
00:27:05,764 --> 00:27:08,780
And I know you don't have a lot of time,
747
00:27:08,816 --> 00:27:12,984
but if I was there right now...
748
00:27:13,036 --> 00:27:16,071
that pink housecoat would not be on.
749
00:27:16,123 --> 00:27:18,039
It would be off...
750
00:27:18,075 --> 00:27:19,934
under the bed.
751
00:27:23,413 --> 00:27:24,996
I'd take your wig off.
752
00:27:25,048 --> 00:27:26,715
[Laughter]
753
00:27:27,188 --> 00:27:30,030
sync and corrected by ninh
57017
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