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1
00:00:51,151 --> 00:00:53,720
Telephone's ringing.
2
00:00:58,224 --> 00:01:00,160
Hello, Murray, where are you?
3
00:01:02,362 --> 00:01:05,231
No, Mrs. Klein,
I ain't Murray.
4
00:01:05,331 --> 00:01:08,101
I'm sorry, I'm Edith Bunker.
5
00:01:08,201 --> 00:01:11,071
I mean, I ain't sorry
I'm Edith Bunker,
6
00:01:11,171 --> 00:01:13,173
I'm sorry I ain't Murray.
7
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It's Murray's partner's wife
8
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with a long story.
9
00:01:19,712 --> 00:01:22,715
I'm sorry, I thought
you were my long-lost son
10
00:01:22,816 --> 00:01:24,984
who I haven't seen
since breakfast.
11
00:01:26,319 --> 00:01:28,054
Oh.
12
00:01:28,154 --> 00:01:30,223
I made the matzah ball soup,
13
00:01:30,323 --> 00:01:31,591
just the way you told me
14
00:01:31,691 --> 00:01:33,693
and it's delicious.
15
00:01:33,793 --> 00:01:35,595
If you don't
have trouble with gas,
16
00:01:35,695 --> 00:01:37,697
it's delicious.
17
00:01:38,631 --> 00:01:40,900
Hmm, it's so delicious
18
00:01:41,000 --> 00:01:42,836
I was hoping that
you and your sister
19
00:01:42,936 --> 00:01:44,170
would change your mind
20
00:01:44,270 --> 00:01:46,339
and come over
for dinner tonight.
21
00:01:47,640 --> 00:01:50,376
She wants us to eat
her matzah balls.
22
00:01:50,477 --> 00:01:51,911
I heard that.
23
00:01:53,746 --> 00:01:55,682
It's gonna be a nice party,
24
00:01:55,782 --> 00:01:57,350
just me, and Archie,
25
00:01:57,450 --> 00:01:59,819
and Murray, and his friend,
26
00:01:59,919 --> 00:02:02,122
and Stephanie.
27
00:02:02,222 --> 00:02:04,023
Murray and what friend?
28
00:02:04,124 --> 00:02:05,959
The friend he's bringing.
29
00:02:06,860 --> 00:02:07,860
A man friend
30
00:02:07,927 --> 00:02:09,162
or a lady friend?
31
00:02:09,262 --> 00:02:10,563
A lady friend.
32
00:02:12,332 --> 00:02:14,167
We'll be there in 15 minutes.
33
00:02:14,267 --> 00:02:15,168
Goodbye.
34
00:02:15,268 --> 00:02:16,903
Oh, good.
35
00:02:17,003 --> 00:02:18,104
Goodbye.
36
00:02:18,204 --> 00:02:19,706
Oh, Stephanie,
37
00:02:19,806 --> 00:02:21,074
would you help me
38
00:02:21,174 --> 00:02:24,043
put two more places
at the table?
39
00:02:24,144 --> 00:02:26,412
Murray's mother and his aunt
40
00:02:26,513 --> 00:02:28,148
are coming, too.
41
00:02:28,248 --> 00:02:30,817
Sure is nice of you
to do all this
just for me.
42
00:02:30,917 --> 00:02:34,254
Oh, I love doing it for you.
43
00:02:34,354 --> 00:02:37,524
And it's fun cooking
for the Jewish Sabbath.
44
00:02:37,624 --> 00:02:39,092
- Shebat.
- Huh?
45
00:02:39,192 --> 00:02:41,094
Shebat, that's Hebrew
for Sabbath.
46
00:02:41,194 --> 00:02:42,395
Sheba.
47
00:02:42,495 --> 00:02:44,931
Shebat with a T at the end.
48
00:02:45,031 --> 00:02:46,766
Oh, Shebat.
49
00:02:46,866 --> 00:02:48,301
- Stephanie: Yeah.
- Oh, my,
50
00:02:48,401 --> 00:02:49,903
ain't it wonderful?
51
00:02:50,003 --> 00:02:53,072
You learn something new
every day...
52
00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:55,441
if you keep your ears open.
53
00:02:58,444 --> 00:03:00,713
Hey, get a load of this here.
54
00:03:00,813 --> 00:03:02,815
Here's a woman who on her death
55
00:03:02,916 --> 00:03:04,651
was found to have no brain.
56
00:03:06,819 --> 00:03:08,488
And just before she died,
57
00:03:08,588 --> 00:03:11,457
they elected her to congress
from Nebraska.
58
00:03:16,196 --> 00:03:17,230
I told Rabbi Jacobs
59
00:03:17,330 --> 00:03:18,898
about our first shebat dinner.
60
00:03:18,998 --> 00:03:21,801
He said you're a wonderful lady.
61
00:03:21,901 --> 00:03:23,136
Did you tell him
62
00:03:23,236 --> 00:03:25,638
that you was gonna ask
your Uncle Archie
63
00:03:25,738 --> 00:03:27,340
to say the blessings?
64
00:03:27,440 --> 00:03:28,440
Uh-huh.
65
00:03:28,508 --> 00:03:29,642
What did he say?
66
00:03:29,742 --> 00:03:31,811
"Oy vey."
67
00:03:33,012 --> 00:03:34,480
What does that mean?
68
00:03:34,581 --> 00:03:38,051
I think it means,
"Have we got trouble."
69
00:03:42,822 --> 00:03:45,391
Oy vey and shebat,
70
00:03:45,491 --> 00:03:48,027
that's two things
I learned today.
71
00:03:49,229 --> 00:03:50,997
Two things in a one day, Edith,
72
00:03:51,097 --> 00:03:54,334
geez, that's kind of
a record for you, ain't it?
73
00:03:55,602 --> 00:03:58,504
Don't the table look pretty?
74
00:03:58,605 --> 00:04:01,174
Well, I think
it's too much fuss, you know.
75
00:04:01,274 --> 00:04:03,176
I mean, you had to get
all of the fancy dishes
76
00:04:03,276 --> 00:04:05,578
and the glasses,
all for you, kiddo.
77
00:04:06,913 --> 00:04:08,047
I wrote out a Jewish prayer
78
00:04:08,147 --> 00:04:09,458
for you to say at dinner,
Uncle Archie.
79
00:04:09,482 --> 00:04:11,184
Oh, hold... hold it, hold it...
80
00:04:11,284 --> 00:04:12,585
A Jewish prayer for me to say?
81
00:04:12,685 --> 00:04:14,320
I ain't gonna do that.
82
00:04:16,256 --> 00:04:17,824
Well, come on, what do you...
83
00:04:17,924 --> 00:04:19,993
If the Lord up there
was to hear Archie Bunker
84
00:04:20,093 --> 00:04:21,628
saying a Jewish prayer,
85
00:04:21,728 --> 00:04:24,664
he'd think I was pulling
some kind of a fast one.
86
00:04:24,764 --> 00:04:27,700
- Please, Uncle Archie.
- Ow!
87
00:04:33,673 --> 00:04:36,042
Would you kindly explain to her
88
00:04:36,142 --> 00:04:38,478
why she mustn't do that?
89
00:04:44,117 --> 00:04:46,786
All you got to say
is two little blessings.
90
00:04:46,886 --> 00:04:49,956
No, no, no.
I don't wanna do that.
91
00:04:50,056 --> 00:04:52,091
I ain't gonna...
92
00:04:52,191 --> 00:04:54,160
Oh, look at this.
93
00:04:56,663 --> 00:04:58,865
Youse all learn this crapola
94
00:04:58,965 --> 00:05:01,067
very young, don't you?
95
00:05:01,167 --> 00:05:02,935
Archie:
All right, all right,
all right.
96
00:05:03,036 --> 00:05:04,170
All right, all right,
97
00:05:04,270 --> 00:05:05,938
- all right, all right.
- I'll say it,
98
00:05:06,039 --> 00:05:08,174
but I draw the line
at wearing one of them beanies.
99
00:05:08,274 --> 00:05:10,176
- Thank you, thank you.
- Don't, don't, don't.
100
00:05:10,276 --> 00:05:11,744
Stop that, stop that.
101
00:05:11,844 --> 00:05:13,780
All right.
I'm gonna say the prayer.
102
00:05:13,880 --> 00:05:15,214
Here's the book.
103
00:05:18,351 --> 00:05:20,353
Well, what the hell did they do?
104
00:05:20,453 --> 00:05:21,821
Set it to music?
105
00:05:21,921 --> 00:05:23,456
Stephanie:
That's Hebrew.
106
00:05:23,556 --> 00:05:25,458
Oh.
107
00:05:25,558 --> 00:05:26,859
Oh, well.
108
00:05:26,959 --> 00:05:29,962
Well, I can't sing it
in that neither.
109
00:05:31,130 --> 00:05:32,565
Oh, I'll get it.
110
00:05:32,665 --> 00:05:33,933
Stephanie:
I'll get it.
111
00:05:34,033 --> 00:05:35,210
- I'll get it, I'll get it.
- Hey, wait a minute.
112
00:05:35,234 --> 00:05:36,636
Hold it, hold it, hold it, stop!
113
00:05:36,736 --> 00:05:39,472
Don't open that,
don't open that.
114
00:05:40,440 --> 00:05:42,575
Gee, the way the two of youse
115
00:05:42,675 --> 00:05:44,811
race over to that door,
116
00:05:44,911 --> 00:05:46,512
every time the bell rings
in this house,
117
00:05:46,612 --> 00:05:49,415
youse two make it
look like a jailbreak.
118
00:05:50,550 --> 00:05:53,386
Oh, hurry up, they're waiting.
119
00:05:53,486 --> 00:05:55,688
Open the door.
120
00:05:58,491 --> 00:06:00,793
- Edith! Hello.
- Hi, Murray.
121
00:06:00,893 --> 00:06:02,995
Edith, I want you to meet
Ruth Kendall,
122
00:06:03,096 --> 00:06:04,130
Edith Bunker.
123
00:06:04,230 --> 00:06:05,865
- How do you do?
- How do you do?
124
00:06:05,965 --> 00:06:07,967
And this is Stephanie.
125
00:06:08,067 --> 00:06:09,602
- Hi.
- Hello, Stephanie.
126
00:06:09,702 --> 00:06:12,538
Maybe I should say, shalom,
127
00:06:12,638 --> 00:06:15,575
that's hello in your language.
128
00:06:15,675 --> 00:06:17,377
Oh, I'm not Jewish.
129
00:06:19,112 --> 00:06:21,447
Neither am I.
130
00:06:21,547 --> 00:06:23,383
I am. Shalom.
131
00:06:23,483 --> 00:06:24,884
Oh, shalom, Stephanie.
132
00:06:24,984 --> 00:06:27,019
And that is my partner,
133
00:06:27,120 --> 00:06:28,254
Archie Bunker.
134
00:06:28,354 --> 00:06:29,354
Hello.
135
00:06:29,422 --> 00:06:31,157
Hi, hi, hi,
136
00:06:31,257 --> 00:06:33,359
uh, that's hello in Gentile.
137
00:06:33,459 --> 00:06:35,395
- Hi.
- Nice to meet you,
Mr. Bunker.
138
00:06:35,495 --> 00:06:38,564
Oh, well, hey,
likewise, I'm sure.
139
00:06:40,500 --> 00:06:41,667
And for the hostess,
140
00:06:41,768 --> 00:06:43,536
sweets to the sweet.
141
00:06:43,636 --> 00:06:45,738
Oh, Murray,
142
00:06:45,838 --> 00:06:47,707
thank you.
143
00:06:47,807 --> 00:06:49,375
You shouldn't have.
144
00:06:49,475 --> 00:06:51,177
What do you mean?
Sure he should've.
145
00:06:51,277 --> 00:06:53,088
While he was at it,
he should have brung something
146
00:06:53,112 --> 00:06:54,247
for the host, too, huh?
147
00:06:54,347 --> 00:06:55,415
Huh?
148
00:06:56,215 --> 00:06:57,950
I think I did.
149
00:06:59,585 --> 00:07:02,155
- Well, sit down, everybody.
- Yeah. Sit down, sit down.
150
00:07:02,255 --> 00:07:04,175
No, not there,
get out of there,
get out of there.
151
00:07:04,223 --> 00:07:05,334
That's for the young lady here.
152
00:07:05,358 --> 00:07:06,358
Oh, thank you.
153
00:07:06,426 --> 00:07:07,927
No, not there, Murray.
154
00:07:08,027 --> 00:07:09,929
Come on,
there's other chairs, huh?
155
00:07:10,029 --> 00:07:11,664
Okay, Archie.
156
00:07:15,668 --> 00:07:18,871
So, uh, how long
have youse two been, uh,
157
00:07:18,971 --> 00:07:21,707
what do you call, uh, together?
158
00:07:21,808 --> 00:07:23,176
Archie.
159
00:07:26,446 --> 00:07:29,282
We've been dating for...
160
00:07:29,382 --> 00:07:30,883
Both:
Three months...
161
00:07:30,983 --> 00:07:33,553
and four days.
162
00:07:33,653 --> 00:07:37,056
Oh, well past the awkward stage.
163
00:07:38,324 --> 00:07:39,959
That's nice.
164
00:07:40,059 --> 00:07:42,028
Well, I couldn't say, Edith.
165
00:07:42,128 --> 00:07:44,363
I don't know what
they've been doing.
166
00:07:44,464 --> 00:07:46,766
Mind your own business.
167
00:07:46,866 --> 00:07:49,135
Now I know.
168
00:07:51,370 --> 00:07:53,072
Archie,
169
00:07:53,172 --> 00:07:57,310
"ere's the... an ild chi...
ere he."
170
00:07:58,778 --> 00:08:00,480
Huh?
171
00:08:01,714 --> 00:08:03,382
Oh, uh, oh, yeah.
172
00:08:03,483 --> 00:08:05,918
Uh, Edith is trying to say
that, uh...
173
00:08:06,018 --> 00:08:08,287
there's a child here,
so watch your conversation,
174
00:08:08,387 --> 00:08:09,755
huh, Murray?
175
00:08:09,856 --> 00:08:12,058
Do I have time to freshen up
before dinner, please?
176
00:08:12,158 --> 00:08:14,360
She wants to go
to the toilet, Edith.
177
00:08:17,129 --> 00:08:19,932
The powder room.
178
00:08:20,032 --> 00:08:21,534
Oh, well, take your pick,
179
00:08:21,634 --> 00:08:23,803
but it's, uh, right at the head
of the stairs there.
180
00:08:23,903 --> 00:08:25,605
- Thank you.
- Yeah. You can't miss it,
181
00:08:25,705 --> 00:08:28,307
it's the door
with the no knob on it.
182
00:08:30,743 --> 00:08:32,345
Stephanie:
I'll hold it
closed for you.
183
00:08:32,445 --> 00:08:34,213
Ruth:
Thank you, Stephanie.
184
00:08:35,448 --> 00:08:36,916
Well, not there, Murray,
185
00:08:37,016 --> 00:08:39,018
there's other chairs.
186
00:08:42,755 --> 00:08:44,056
Well, well, well,
187
00:08:44,156 --> 00:08:46,826
you sly dog.
188
00:08:48,628 --> 00:08:50,588
How come you never brung
that swell-looking number
189
00:08:50,663 --> 00:08:52,365
around to the saloon?
190
00:08:52,465 --> 00:08:53,666
Oh, Murray,
191
00:08:53,766 --> 00:08:56,469
- she's a lovely girl.
- Yes.
192
00:08:56,569 --> 00:09:00,806
I'll bet your mother
is very pleased.
193
00:09:00,907 --> 00:09:02,675
My mother thinks
it's a sin for me
194
00:09:02,775 --> 00:09:05,678
to date girls who aren't Jewish.
195
00:09:05,778 --> 00:09:08,180
Well, it is,
but lie to your mother.
196
00:09:09,215 --> 00:09:11,250
I always do.
197
00:09:11,350 --> 00:09:13,419
She doesn't know
that I'm going with Ruthie.
198
00:09:24,897 --> 00:09:26,866
Oy vey.
199
00:09:31,404 --> 00:09:33,339
What did you say?
200
00:09:35,541 --> 00:09:36,876
Oy vey.
201
00:09:36,976 --> 00:09:40,146
It means,
"have we got trouble."
202
00:09:41,414 --> 00:09:42,515
Well, I know what it means,
203
00:09:42,615 --> 00:09:44,517
but why did you say it?
204
00:09:51,357 --> 00:09:54,894
Guess who's coming to dinner.
205
00:10:07,473 --> 00:10:09,709
Oy vey.
206
00:10:12,778 --> 00:10:14,447
Oh, Murray,
207
00:10:14,547 --> 00:10:16,515
I'm sorry.
208
00:10:17,817 --> 00:10:19,518
Oh,
209
00:10:19,619 --> 00:10:20,820
I get it.
210
00:10:21,921 --> 00:10:23,689
Oh, geez.
211
00:10:28,194 --> 00:10:30,396
Did you ever hear
of the word schlemiel?
212
00:10:33,666 --> 00:10:36,669
Well, that's Heb for dingbat.
213
00:10:43,342 --> 00:10:47,580
That's the third thing
I've learned today.
214
00:10:54,553 --> 00:10:55,921
Edith, I hate to do this to you,
215
00:10:56,022 --> 00:10:57,332
but I think it's best
for everybody
216
00:10:57,356 --> 00:10:58,858
for Ruthie and me
to leave right now.
217
00:10:58,958 --> 00:11:00,960
- Oh, no.
- Murray: Ruthie.
218
00:11:01,060 --> 00:11:03,062
Edith:
Please, Murray, don't go.
219
00:11:03,162 --> 00:11:04,964
Oh, geez, now ain't this a hoot.
220
00:11:05,064 --> 00:11:08,167
A grown up man
is scared of his mother.
221
00:11:08,267 --> 00:11:10,036
You don't know my mother.
222
00:11:10,136 --> 00:11:11,671
Ruthie, please, hurry up.
223
00:11:11,771 --> 00:11:14,140
Well,
my mother never told me
who to go out with.
224
00:11:14,240 --> 00:11:16,142
No, your father did.
225
00:11:16,242 --> 00:11:18,310
Murray:
Ruthie, please, hurry up.
226
00:11:22,548 --> 00:11:24,016
Uh-oh.
227
00:11:25,518 --> 00:11:28,921
Well, I don't see nobody
racing for the door now.
228
00:11:32,124 --> 00:11:33,392
Well, go on, Edith,
229
00:11:33,492 --> 00:11:35,928
face up
to the terrible thing
you've done.
230
00:11:41,367 --> 00:11:43,269
- Oh, hi, come right in.
- Hello.
231
00:11:43,369 --> 00:11:45,071
I'm Edith Bunker.
232
00:11:45,171 --> 00:11:46,439
I'm Rose Klein.
233
00:11:46,539 --> 00:11:47,539
This is Tante Gussie.
234
00:11:47,606 --> 00:11:48,774
Tante Gussie:
How do?
235
00:11:48,874 --> 00:11:51,577
I mean, shalom.
236
00:11:51,677 --> 00:11:52,878
She's saying hello.
237
00:11:52,978 --> 00:11:54,680
I heard that.
238
00:11:57,950 --> 00:11:59,351
Mama.
239
00:11:59,452 --> 00:12:01,821
Hello, Mama.
240
00:12:03,589 --> 00:12:07,159
- What am I, chopped liver?
- No.
241
00:12:07,259 --> 00:12:08,961
How are you, Mama?
242
00:12:09,061 --> 00:12:10,763
A lot you care.
243
00:12:10,863 --> 00:12:12,098
Where's the girl?
244
00:12:21,774 --> 00:12:23,809
She's up in the toilet.
245
00:12:26,011 --> 00:12:28,114
We heard that.
246
00:12:30,583 --> 00:12:32,318
Oh, uh, Tante Gussie, Mama,
247
00:12:32,418 --> 00:12:33,619
come meet my friend here,
248
00:12:33,719 --> 00:12:35,654
my partner, Archie Bunker,
249
00:12:35,755 --> 00:12:37,456
- Mama.
- Hey, hi, hi.
250
00:12:37,556 --> 00:12:38,858
So, you're Archie Bunker?
251
00:12:38,958 --> 00:12:40,726
Yeah, that's who I am.
252
00:12:40,826 --> 00:12:42,895
- Murray told me all about you.
- -Oh, yeah?
253
00:12:42,995 --> 00:12:44,730
Well, he told me
a lot about you, too.
254
00:12:44,830 --> 00:12:46,932
Murray's got a big mouth.
255
00:12:49,668 --> 00:12:50,870
Well, everybody, sit down.
256
00:12:50,970 --> 00:12:52,380
Archie:
Yeah, yeah.
Everybody sit down,
257
00:12:52,404 --> 00:12:53,839
sure, yeah, go ahead.
258
00:12:53,939 --> 00:12:55,841
Sit down, uh, except, uh,
259
00:12:55,941 --> 00:12:57,777
I usually sit there.
260
00:12:57,877 --> 00:12:59,345
Well, you can sit there.
261
00:13:06,118 --> 00:13:07,486
Ma, you look so nice,
262
00:13:07,586 --> 00:13:10,156
I've never seen
that dress before.
263
00:13:10,256 --> 00:13:12,024
You would have seen it before
264
00:13:12,124 --> 00:13:14,026
if you'd had come to pick me up.
265
00:13:14,126 --> 00:13:15,394
Well, until two minutes ago,
266
00:13:15,494 --> 00:13:16,694
I didn't know you were coming.
267
00:13:16,729 --> 00:13:18,330
The day you were born,
268
00:13:18,430 --> 00:13:20,366
I didn't know you were coming,
269
00:13:20,466 --> 00:13:22,501
but I was there.
270
00:13:25,471 --> 00:13:26,472
See what I mean?
271
00:13:26,572 --> 00:13:29,408
I'm a little scared
of her myself.
272
00:13:31,043 --> 00:13:32,545
She's finished.
273
00:13:34,980 --> 00:13:37,716
Edith:
Oh, uh, Stephie,
this is Murray's mother,
274
00:13:37,817 --> 00:13:39,718
- Mrs. Klein.
- Hello, darling.
275
00:13:39,819 --> 00:13:41,029
- Tante Gussie:
Oh, how adorable.
- Hi, Mrs. Klein.
276
00:13:41,053 --> 00:13:43,055
Edith:
And this is his
Aunt Gussie.
277
00:13:43,155 --> 00:13:44,290
Hi, Aunt Gussie.
278
00:13:44,390 --> 00:13:46,625
Edith:
Stephie is our
little niece.
279
00:13:46,725 --> 00:13:47,927
Hello.
280
00:13:53,899 --> 00:13:56,535
And whose little niece is this?
281
00:13:58,003 --> 00:14:00,105
Well, Ruth,
this is my mother,
my Tante Gussie.
282
00:14:00,206 --> 00:14:01,206
Ruth:
Oh, how do you do?
283
00:14:01,240 --> 00:14:02,775
This is my friend, Ruth Kendall.
284
00:14:02,875 --> 00:14:05,945
Oh, how do you do?
285
00:14:06,045 --> 00:14:08,848
Murray, she's such
an adorable girl,
286
00:14:08,948 --> 00:14:10,416
Miss Mendel.
287
00:14:11,517 --> 00:14:13,586
What a beautiful head of hair,
288
00:14:13,686 --> 00:14:15,054
nice shape,
289
00:14:16,355 --> 00:14:18,724
Spiffy dresser, huh?
290
00:14:18,824 --> 00:14:20,226
Tell me, tell me,
291
00:14:20,326 --> 00:14:22,795
where did you two meet,
Miss Mendel?
292
00:14:22,895 --> 00:14:26,098
It's not Mendel, it's Kendall.
293
00:14:26,198 --> 00:14:28,200
Kendall?
294
00:14:30,302 --> 00:14:32,571
Her name is not...
295
00:14:32,671 --> 00:14:33,973
Not what, Ma?
296
00:14:34,073 --> 00:14:35,908
Rose:
Not...
297
00:14:36,008 --> 00:14:38,244
No, Ma, it's not a Jewish name.
298
00:14:42,248 --> 00:14:44,116
I heard that.
299
00:14:45,317 --> 00:14:46,317
Yeah, that's right, Mom,
300
00:14:46,385 --> 00:14:47,620
she's one of ours.
301
00:14:48,554 --> 00:14:50,556
Oy vey.
302
00:14:52,892 --> 00:14:54,226
Mama, you all right, Mama?
303
00:14:54,326 --> 00:14:55,326
- I'm all right.
- Mama.
304
00:14:55,394 --> 00:14:56,394
I'm all right,
305
00:14:56,462 --> 00:14:58,130
I'm better than all right.
306
00:14:58,230 --> 00:15:00,466
- I'm fine and dandy.
- Good.
307
00:15:00,566 --> 00:15:02,835
I'm so sorry,
Mrs. Klein.
308
00:15:02,935 --> 00:15:03,936
What's to be sorry?
309
00:15:04,036 --> 00:15:06,505
You're such an adorable girl.
310
00:15:06,605 --> 00:15:08,307
Thank you.
311
00:15:08,407 --> 00:15:10,943
My mother thought Murray
was adorable, too.
312
00:15:11,043 --> 00:15:13,412
Oh, oh, oh,
313
00:15:13,512 --> 00:15:15,247
so she already brung you over
314
00:15:15,347 --> 00:15:16,415
to meet her mother, huh?
315
00:15:16,515 --> 00:15:18,550
That's right.
316
00:15:18,651 --> 00:15:19,718
Well, I guess,
317
00:15:19,818 --> 00:15:21,387
we know what that means,
huh, Mom?
318
00:15:21,487 --> 00:15:22,621
- Oy vey.
- Oh, Mrs. Klein.
319
00:15:22,721 --> 00:15:24,423
I'm all right.
320
00:15:25,991 --> 00:15:28,427
So, they went out on a date.
321
00:15:28,527 --> 00:15:30,029
Big deal.
322
00:15:30,129 --> 00:15:32,898
Well, it could be
a big deal there, Tonto.
323
00:15:40,406 --> 00:15:41,840
I mean, after all, these two,
324
00:15:41,941 --> 00:15:43,309
they've been doing
their number now
325
00:15:43,409 --> 00:15:45,778
for three months and four days,
326
00:15:45,878 --> 00:15:48,147
which is a lot of nights.
327
00:15:50,950 --> 00:15:52,217
Archie.
328
00:15:52,318 --> 00:15:53,886
Well, so, it's nice
329
00:15:53,986 --> 00:15:55,654
he got a steady girlfriend.
330
00:15:55,754 --> 00:15:58,090
Sure, hey, I'm all for that.
331
00:15:58,190 --> 00:16:00,726
Romance, you know, marriage.
332
00:16:00,826 --> 00:16:02,561
Hey, they could have a family.
333
00:16:02,661 --> 00:16:04,697
You still up for that,
ain't you?
334
00:16:06,899 --> 00:16:08,701
Why don't you behave?
335
00:16:09,802 --> 00:16:11,070
I'm only interested
336
00:16:11,170 --> 00:16:12,905
in the family, the kids.
337
00:16:13,005 --> 00:16:15,174
How would you raise
the kids there Ruthie,
338
00:16:15,274 --> 00:16:16,909
Jewish or our way?
339
00:16:17,009 --> 00:16:18,978
- Oy vey.
- Oh, Mrs. Klein.
340
00:16:19,078 --> 00:16:20,112
I'm all right.
341
00:16:20,212 --> 00:16:22,614
Why does she keep hitting me?
342
00:16:22,715 --> 00:16:25,217
It's better than
throwing water on you.
343
00:16:27,886 --> 00:16:30,389
Maybe I better get dinner on.
344
00:16:30,489 --> 00:16:32,291
Can I help you,
Mrs. Bunker?
345
00:16:32,391 --> 00:16:34,460
Oh, are you sure
you feel like it?
346
00:16:34,560 --> 00:16:35,761
I'd love to.
347
00:16:35,861 --> 00:16:36,862
Yeah, let her help.
348
00:16:36,962 --> 00:16:39,331
She don't wanna
sit with us no more.
349
00:16:41,433 --> 00:16:43,535
What's with the face on you?
350
00:16:43,635 --> 00:16:46,105
There ain't much to do.
351
00:16:46,205 --> 00:16:47,439
Would you like to sit down?
352
00:16:47,539 --> 00:16:50,009
I'd like to drop dead.
353
00:16:50,109 --> 00:16:51,643
- Oy vey.
- How could he do this
354
00:16:51,744 --> 00:16:53,779
to his own mother?
355
00:16:53,879 --> 00:16:55,814
Well, let me get you
glass of water.
356
00:16:55,914 --> 00:16:56,982
I don't need water,
357
00:16:57,082 --> 00:16:59,084
I could use
a little Schnapps, please.
358
00:16:59,184 --> 00:17:00,753
Sure.
359
00:17:00,853 --> 00:17:02,488
What is that?
360
00:17:03,088 --> 00:17:04,623
Booze, whiskey.
361
00:17:04,723 --> 00:17:08,227
Oh, sure, we got that.
362
00:17:08,327 --> 00:17:11,697
Archie calls it
his Saturday night special.
363
00:17:13,065 --> 00:17:15,501
Thank God
Murray's father's not here.
364
00:17:15,601 --> 00:17:17,936
If he were alive,
he'd drop dead.
365
00:17:19,104 --> 00:17:21,940
It's good he's dead already.
366
00:17:25,844 --> 00:17:27,980
Children, children,
367
00:17:28,080 --> 00:17:30,149
sometimes I think God
put them on earth
368
00:17:30,249 --> 00:17:32,584
just to aggravate their mothers.
369
00:17:32,684 --> 00:17:34,386
Children are sweet,
370
00:17:34,486 --> 00:17:36,555
I love children.
371
00:17:37,790 --> 00:17:39,892
Sure, you don't have any.
372
00:17:39,992 --> 00:17:42,528
Oh, sure.
373
00:17:42,628 --> 00:17:45,064
I got Stephie
374
00:17:45,164 --> 00:17:47,699
and I got a real daughter
375
00:17:47,800 --> 00:17:50,235
in California.
376
00:17:50,335 --> 00:17:51,503
No sons?
377
00:17:51,603 --> 00:17:53,005
No.
378
00:17:53,105 --> 00:17:55,274
No wonder you love children.
379
00:17:57,376 --> 00:18:00,012
I think my Murray
takes those shiksas out
380
00:18:00,112 --> 00:18:01,780
just to upset me.
381
00:18:05,584 --> 00:18:07,419
Mrs. Klein,
382
00:18:07,519 --> 00:18:09,788
I don't think it's important
383
00:18:09,888 --> 00:18:12,191
what a person's religion is.
384
00:18:12,291 --> 00:18:16,295
It don't matter
what church they go to.
385
00:18:16,395 --> 00:18:19,064
Just like, it don't matter
386
00:18:19,164 --> 00:18:21,200
what color their skin is,
387
00:18:21,300 --> 00:18:23,068
or how they vote,
388
00:18:23,168 --> 00:18:25,337
or anything.
389
00:18:26,538 --> 00:18:29,741
Remember that story
in the Bible?
390
00:18:29,842 --> 00:18:31,543
She was a Ruth, too.
391
00:18:31,643 --> 00:18:35,147
She said, I go where you goeth,
392
00:18:35,247 --> 00:18:37,216
and your people
393
00:18:37,316 --> 00:18:39,685
will be my people.
394
00:18:39,785 --> 00:18:43,355
And that Ruth
was a Gentile, too.
395
00:18:46,024 --> 00:18:48,927
You're a good person,
Mrs. Bunker.
396
00:18:49,027 --> 00:18:50,829
What a shame you're not Jewish.
397
00:18:50,929 --> 00:18:53,031
We could use someone like you.
398
00:18:56,268 --> 00:18:58,003
Mrs. Klein,
399
00:18:58,103 --> 00:19:00,072
I think Murray and Ruth
400
00:19:00,172 --> 00:19:03,275
are very happy together.
401
00:19:03,375 --> 00:19:06,145
Why should you let
their happiness
402
00:19:06,245 --> 00:19:08,714
make you so unhappy?
403
00:19:10,983 --> 00:19:12,684
Because it's wrong.
404
00:19:14,853 --> 00:19:16,989
What if they do have children?
405
00:19:18,357 --> 00:19:20,559
What will the children be?
406
00:19:20,659 --> 00:19:22,227
Nothing.
407
00:19:29,368 --> 00:19:32,571
Lots of people
marry outside their faith
408
00:19:32,671 --> 00:19:35,240
and they have children.
409
00:19:35,340 --> 00:19:37,276
My nephew, Floyd,
410
00:19:37,376 --> 00:19:39,745
he married a Jewish girl.
411
00:19:39,845 --> 00:19:41,680
Did it work out?
412
00:19:41,780 --> 00:19:43,115
- No.
- Hmm.
413
00:19:43,215 --> 00:19:45,484
But it might have
if she hadn't been killed
414
00:19:45,584 --> 00:19:47,853
in a car accident.
415
00:19:52,524 --> 00:19:54,259
And something good
416
00:19:54,359 --> 00:19:57,262
come out of their marriage.
417
00:19:57,362 --> 00:20:01,099
They had Stephie,
she's their daughter.
418
00:20:01,900 --> 00:20:04,236
- Stephie's Jewish?
- Yeah.
419
00:20:04,336 --> 00:20:06,438
And we all live together here,
420
00:20:06,538 --> 00:20:07,839
we have a fine time.
421
00:20:07,940 --> 00:20:09,074
Stephie's Jewish,
422
00:20:09,174 --> 00:20:10,342
I'm Episcopal,
423
00:20:10,442 --> 00:20:12,444
and Archie is...
424
00:20:12,544 --> 00:20:14,012
something else.
425
00:20:16,982 --> 00:20:19,384
And we all love each other.
426
00:20:24,756 --> 00:20:26,091
Mrs. Bunker,
427
00:20:26,191 --> 00:20:27,960
this is your home.
428
00:20:28,060 --> 00:20:30,262
That's nice.
429
00:20:32,931 --> 00:20:33,966
Let me bring something.
430
00:20:34,066 --> 00:20:36,168
Yeah, bring yourself.
431
00:20:37,436 --> 00:20:40,472
Okay, everybody, dinner.
432
00:20:40,572 --> 00:20:43,575
Edith:
You sit right there,
Mrs. Klein.
433
00:20:43,675 --> 00:20:45,310
Anywhere in particular for me?
434
00:20:45,410 --> 00:20:47,679
Ruth, why don't you sit by me?
435
00:20:47,779 --> 00:20:49,915
Thank you, Mrs. Klein.
436
00:20:50,015 --> 00:20:51,483
Murray:
Yeah, sit here, Mama.
437
00:20:51,583 --> 00:20:54,219
Tante Gussie:
Doesn't the table
look lovely?
438
00:20:54,319 --> 00:20:55,454
Well, come on, let's put on
439
00:20:55,554 --> 00:20:57,189
the kosher feedbag here.
440
00:20:57,289 --> 00:20:59,324
Not yet.
441
00:20:59,424 --> 00:21:01,426
What are you doing
with that on your head?
442
00:21:01,526 --> 00:21:02,861
Come on, Murray,
this is a dinner,
443
00:21:02,961 --> 00:21:05,063
it ain't a funeral.
444
00:21:05,163 --> 00:21:06,298
This one's for you.
445
00:21:06,398 --> 00:21:08,200
Oh, come on. No.
446
00:21:15,240 --> 00:21:16,308
Mm.
447
00:21:16,408 --> 00:21:18,810
What do you mean, "uhh"?
448
00:21:18,910 --> 00:21:21,813
- You know what we look like?
- A couple of fat chinks.
449
00:21:23,415 --> 00:21:24,655
And this is for you Aunt Edith.
450
00:21:24,716 --> 00:21:26,752
Edith:
Oh, yeah.
451
00:21:37,229 --> 00:21:38,829
Is there any way
to hurry this up, Edith?
452
00:21:43,001 --> 00:21:44,569
Edith:
There.
453
00:21:44,670 --> 00:21:46,805
- Three times.
- Oh, yeah.
454
00:21:46,905 --> 00:21:49,508
One...
455
00:21:49,608 --> 00:21:51,777
two...
456
00:21:51,877 --> 00:21:53,512
three.
457
00:21:56,248 --> 00:21:59,484
Blessed is the eternal power
458
00:21:59,584 --> 00:22:01,720
that inspires our people
459
00:22:01,820 --> 00:22:04,323
to kindle the Sabbath lights.
460
00:22:04,423 --> 00:22:05,424
Oh, amen.
461
00:22:05,524 --> 00:22:07,426
No, wait a minute, there's more.
462
00:22:10,295 --> 00:22:12,364
May we be blessed
463
00:22:12,464 --> 00:22:14,866
with a life of joy
464
00:22:14,966 --> 00:22:16,601
and peace.
465
00:22:16,702 --> 00:22:17,803
Stephanie:
Amen.
466
00:22:17,903 --> 00:22:19,071
All:
Amen.
467
00:22:19,171 --> 00:22:21,306
All right, now,
can we begin, huh?
468
00:22:21,406 --> 00:22:22,974
Stephanie:
Not until you bless the wine.
469
00:22:23,075 --> 00:22:25,043
Oh, yeah, I said
I was gonna do this.
470
00:22:25,143 --> 00:22:26,578
Let's see this.
471
00:22:26,678 --> 00:22:28,714
- Uh, blessed are you...
- Stephanie: Stand up!
472
00:22:28,814 --> 00:22:30,315
Don't holler at me, huh.
473
00:22:33,318 --> 00:22:35,320
Blessed are you, our God,
474
00:22:35,420 --> 00:22:37,089
ruler of the universe,
475
00:22:37,189 --> 00:22:39,591
creator of the fruit
of the vine.
476
00:22:39,691 --> 00:22:40,691
Stephanie:
Amen.
477
00:22:40,759 --> 00:22:42,094
All:
Amen.
478
00:22:42,194 --> 00:22:43,362
Stephanie:
Drink, everybody.
479
00:22:46,198 --> 00:22:47,642
Tante Gussie:
Oh, this wine is delicious.
480
00:22:47,666 --> 00:22:50,068
- Murray: Isn't that good?
- Terrific, can we begin now?
481
00:22:50,168 --> 00:22:52,003
Not until you bless the bread.
482
00:22:52,104 --> 00:22:53,572
Oh, we're not...
483
00:22:54,606 --> 00:22:56,541
Oh, yeah,
this is the Jewish one.
484
00:23:01,346 --> 00:23:03,382
Come on,
can't you read this, huh?
485
00:23:03,482 --> 00:23:04,850
You're the Jew here.
486
00:23:04,950 --> 00:23:06,351
I don't need that.
487
00:23:14,760 --> 00:23:15,760
Stephanie:
Amen.
488
00:23:15,827 --> 00:23:17,462
All:
Amen.
489
00:23:17,562 --> 00:23:19,364
Gee, what a show-off.
490
00:23:20,665 --> 00:23:22,000
Now, pass the bread,
491
00:23:22,100 --> 00:23:23,468
pass the bread.
492
00:23:23,568 --> 00:23:25,103
Here Mama, here Archie,
493
00:23:25,203 --> 00:23:26,280
don't eat all of it,
pass them along.
494
00:23:26,304 --> 00:23:27,439
This is for you.
495
00:23:27,539 --> 00:23:29,241
- Thank you.
- Here you are.
496
00:23:30,442 --> 00:23:31,442
Thanks, Mama.
497
00:23:31,510 --> 00:23:33,178
Don't mention it.
498
00:23:45,624 --> 00:23:48,360
If you're checking this out,
Lord, uh,
499
00:23:48,460 --> 00:23:49,661
hold the lightning, huh?
500
00:23:49,761 --> 00:23:52,597
I'm only doing it for the kid.
32118
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