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You can't have no without a robber
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00:00:35,818 --> 00:00:39,258
and marriage
3
00:00:40,538 --> 00:00:48,538
it's an institute you can't
miscarriage this i tell you lover
4
00:00:48,858 --> 00:00:54,577
you can't have meg without a robber
5
00:00:54,578 --> 00:01:00,417
and marriage and now for the local
news today a lifelong chicago resident was
6
00:01:00,418 --> 00:01:04,737
discovered by a hollywood talent scout
while having her hair done while in two
7
00:01:04,738 --> 00:01:08,417
sweet guys hair salon maryland
neighbors a single librarian
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00:01:08,418 --> 00:01:11,857
from east chicago was noticed
by the talent agent sent out
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00:01:11,858 --> 00:01:15,057
to cast the lead role for
stephen spielberg's next major
10
00:01:15,058 --> 00:01:18,657
motion picture entitled extra
testicles from gremlins of
11
00:01:18,658 --> 00:01:22,417
another kind god mom how
come nothing exciting like
12
00:01:22,418 --> 00:01:27,697
that ever happens to us girls
there's something i should tell you
13
00:01:27,698 --> 00:01:30,977
while you're still single now
that you're getting older you're
14
00:01:30,978 --> 00:01:33,297
gonna be faced with some
very important decisions
15
00:01:33,298 --> 00:01:36,337
if you don't make the right choices now
there will always be something holding
16
00:01:36,338 --> 00:01:40,417
you back hello loving
family your fearless leader
17
00:01:40,418 --> 00:01:47,401
is home oh sound the
trumpet the royal prince of
18
00:01:47,402 --> 00:01:53,002
poverty has arrived oh not
tonight beg not even your
19
00:01:53,162 --> 00:01:59,241
remarks can dampen my mood today
today is my day today is a day that i
20
00:01:59,242 --> 00:02:02,441
broke the chains of oppression that have
been holding me down ever since the day
21
00:02:02,442 --> 00:02:08,129
i said those two evil words i do
22
00:02:08,130 --> 00:02:12,049
you must be in the day the coach asked
who owned the stained boxers hanging
23
00:02:12,050 --> 00:02:15,402
from the flagpole
24
00:02:15,482 --> 00:02:19,962
if only you knew red goddess of gloom
25
00:02:20,682 --> 00:02:25,081
we gotta be going yeah finally hi
26
00:02:25,082 --> 00:02:30,042
bye miss undy bye how
27
00:02:30,362 --> 00:02:34,601
what happened daddy i have some news
is so good i want the whole family to hear
28
00:02:34,602 --> 00:02:39,081
it even the boy dad
29
00:02:39,082 --> 00:02:44,682
come on down here your daddy's
got some news to share with you
30
00:02:45,402 --> 00:02:51,441
so what's up dad the gods
of relief smile down upon your
31
00:02:51,442 --> 00:02:56,713
father today meg do you
remember a guy back in high
32
00:02:56,714 --> 00:03:01,673
school named squeaky bend over
yeah wasn't he the one that took off with
33
00:03:01,674 --> 00:03:03,913
all the money about a
week before graduation
34
00:03:03,914 --> 00:03:08,633
now now meg you know that was never
proven but the important thing is here
35
00:03:08,634 --> 00:03:12,553
he was a center on our football
team and he was a friend of mine
36
00:03:12,554 --> 00:03:16,473
well now it seems he owns a chain
of men's and women's shoe stores
37
00:03:16,474 --> 00:03:19,913
i'm proud family you're
now looking at a shareholder
38
00:03:19,914 --> 00:03:26,713
and regional manager of shoes are us
at a starting salary of one hundred and
39
00:03:26,714 --> 00:03:30,633
eighty thousand dollars a year
does that mean i can have a new car
40
00:03:30,634 --> 00:03:37,034
daddy sure pumpkin you
can have daddy's old car
41
00:03:37,674 --> 00:03:44,065
how long these days of pushing
over how much did you invest how
42
00:03:44,066 --> 00:03:47,825
take note dad these are the kind of
things that hold down great men like
43
00:03:47,826 --> 00:03:55,393
your father for years how much how
44
00:03:55,394 --> 00:03:58,433
three thousand dollars
a mere drop in a bucket
45
00:03:58,434 --> 00:04:03,206
for soon the undy river overflow at the tax
46
00:04:07,770 --> 00:04:13,769
$3,000? Would you do how? Sell
your bathwater to chemical research?
47
00:04:13,770 --> 00:04:17,802
No, just a little creative
financing. Nellie,
48
00:04:17,814 --> 00:04:21,769
honey, you like the
sun and sand, don't you?
49
00:04:21,770 --> 00:04:22,770
Sure, Daddy.
50
00:04:22,771 --> 00:04:25,769
And how do you feel
about dark men in turbans?
51
00:04:25,770 --> 00:04:28,769
You mean like a Porsche,
Daddy? I love them.
52
00:04:28,770 --> 00:04:31,769
I think that's turbo, Nellie.
53
00:04:31,770 --> 00:04:34,856
Now stay out of this,
Dud. This is none of your
54
00:04:34,868 --> 00:04:37,769
concern. Daddy's
talking to his little girl.
55
00:04:37,770 --> 00:04:40,858
Listen, Nellie, you're
out of school now, honey,
56
00:04:40,870 --> 00:04:43,905
and job prospects aren't
looking too promising.
57
00:04:43,906 --> 00:04:47,905
But I sure would like you
to go out and see the world.
58
00:04:47,906 --> 00:04:50,267
So I've arranged for
you to travel with some of
59
00:04:50,279 --> 00:04:52,905
your girlfriends on a short
trip to the Middle East.
60
00:04:52,906 --> 00:04:54,905
But don't worry, you'll
be home by Christmas.
61
00:04:54,906 --> 00:04:57,905
Do I get to stay in a nice hotel, Daddy?
62
00:04:57,906 --> 00:05:01,977
The finest palace in
the kingdom, my little girl.
63
00:05:01,978 --> 00:05:04,977
What about your job, Hal?
64
00:05:04,978 --> 00:05:10,977
That's behind me now, Meg. I told that
slave-driving boss of mine where to go.
65
00:05:10,978 --> 00:05:14,977
Hal Undy's days of smelling socks are over.
66
00:05:14,978 --> 00:05:19,977
What are you going to do,
Hal? Wear your shoes forever?
67
00:05:19,978 --> 00:05:23,587
No, I'll laugh if you
like, Meg. But from now
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00:05:23,599 --> 00:05:26,978
on, Hal Undy eats
only steak and potatoes.
69
00:05:31,274 --> 00:05:33,274
Hello?
70
00:05:36,762 --> 00:05:39,762
It's for you, Al. It's the FBI.
71
00:05:40,762 --> 00:05:43,274
Yes?
72
00:05:44,274 --> 00:05:46,890
Yes, this is he?
73
00:05:48,442 --> 00:05:49,442
What?
74
00:05:52,434 --> 00:05:54,433
Oh, no, no, no. No, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
75
00:05:54,434 --> 00:05:56,434
Are you sure? Are you sure about this?
76
00:05:57,434 --> 00:05:58,986
Are you...
77
00:05:59,986 --> 00:06:03,362
Oh, God.
78
00:06:06,594 --> 00:06:08,594
Good news, Hal?
79
00:06:09,594 --> 00:06:13,594
Gee, kids, it looks like Howard
Hughes has lost another million.
80
00:06:15,594 --> 00:06:22,946
Well, it seems like Squeaky
had a bit of tax troubles,
81
00:06:23,946 --> 00:06:25,946
and he had to move his stores to...
82
00:06:26,946 --> 00:06:29,402
South America.
83
00:06:31,402 --> 00:06:34,442
Don't worry, Dad. There's going
to be lots of job opportunities
84
00:06:35,442 --> 00:06:37,442
for a man with your talent and experience.
85
00:06:38,442 --> 00:06:41,441
Maybe you could get a job as... a paperboy.
86
00:06:41,442 --> 00:06:45,514
Yeah, Dad, maybe you can be one of those
neat stunt demis on a speak-out commercial.
87
00:06:46,514 --> 00:06:49,514
Or collect a little new cans. You
can get two cents a piece from that.
88
00:06:53,514 --> 00:06:57,514
Come on, kids. Let's leave your
father to wellow in his own self-pity.
89
00:06:58,514 --> 00:06:59,674
We could ruffle up some food.
90
00:07:00,514 --> 00:07:02,514
Dad, get the keys from Marcia's drawer.
91
00:07:03,514 --> 00:07:04,514
Already got them.
92
00:07:05,514 --> 00:07:07,514
Ah, who needs them anyway?
93
00:07:08,554 --> 00:07:11,074
At least I still got my TV.
94
00:07:12,074 --> 00:07:18,610
My lawyer got me 2.1 million
dollars, and I can't even leave.
95
00:07:19,610 --> 00:07:23,409
And that's when the
schedule program will be seen,
96
00:07:23,410 --> 00:07:25,409
so we agree to the
following special presentation.
97
00:07:25,410 --> 00:07:28,122
Portrait of an Abused Housewife.
98
00:07:29,122 --> 00:07:31,122
Oh, God.
99
00:07:32,122 --> 00:07:35,634
I'm so sorry, Dad.
100
00:07:36,634 --> 00:07:38,633
I'm so sorry.
101
00:07:38,634 --> 00:07:40,634
Portrait of an Abused Housewife.
102
00:07:41,634 --> 00:07:44,570
Oh, God.
103
00:07:45,570 --> 00:07:48,186
Mother, I have to ask you something.
104
00:07:49,186 --> 00:07:51,186
Oh, God.
105
00:07:53,890 --> 00:07:55,890
I don't think you do, douche.
106
00:07:56,890 --> 00:07:58,890
And a one, and a two, and a three.
107
00:07:59,890 --> 00:08:02,890
Come on, girls. Stretch
it out. Make it hurt.
108
00:08:04,794 --> 00:08:06,962
And a two, and a three.
109
00:08:07,962 --> 00:08:10,961
Four, five. Stretch it out.
110
00:08:10,962 --> 00:08:15,962
Six, seven, eight, nine.
111
00:08:17,962 --> 00:08:19,962
So glad you can make it, Hal.
112
00:08:25,690 --> 00:08:27,690
Come here, Hal.
113
00:08:28,690 --> 00:08:31,690
Come on. Come and join us, Hal.
114
00:08:32,690 --> 00:08:34,690
Gotta make you hurt.
115
00:08:35,690 --> 00:08:36,690
Right, Hal?
116
00:09:15,514 --> 00:09:18,438
We have to thank you for sharing.
117
00:13:49,626 --> 00:13:52,626
Don't you wish you could wake her up?
118
00:14:14,874 --> 00:14:18,474
♪
119
00:17:24,450 --> 00:17:27,449
Why?
120
00:17:27,450 --> 00:17:28,450
Why Meg?
121
00:17:28,450 --> 00:17:29,450
Why?
122
00:17:29,450 --> 00:17:30,450
What do you want?
123
00:17:30,450 --> 00:17:31,450
Someone's at the door.
124
00:17:31,450 --> 00:17:32,450
So why don't you answer it?
125
00:17:32,451 --> 00:17:37,449
Can't you see my nails aren't dry yet?
126
00:17:37,450 --> 00:17:41,561
No, your honor.
127
00:17:41,562 --> 00:17:48,561
I have no idea how my
wife told me I'm a mysterious.
128
00:17:48,562 --> 00:17:49,562
See the difference?
129
00:17:49,563 --> 00:17:52,562
Buy one, get one free.
130
00:17:53,562 --> 00:17:56,561
Who called Tweedledum and Tweedledour, huh?
131
00:17:56,562 --> 00:17:57,562
I did.
132
00:17:57,563 --> 00:17:59,561
We have to eat something.
133
00:17:59,562 --> 00:18:05,561
Marcia's refrigerator is better
than your bank account, Hal.
134
00:18:05,562 --> 00:18:10,953
Uh, that'll be $12.50, plus for two eggs.
135
00:18:10,954 --> 00:18:12,953
Oh, uh...
136
00:18:12,954 --> 00:18:14,953
Heh heh heh.
137
00:18:14,954 --> 00:18:16,953
Uh...
138
00:18:16,954 --> 00:18:23,561
They'll take care of this.
139
00:18:23,562 --> 00:18:27,625
How can he keep the
pieces upstairs without me?
140
00:18:27,626 --> 00:18:32,625
Now he's paid them.
141
00:18:32,626 --> 00:18:36,169
That'll be $12.50, plus gratuity.
142
00:18:36,170 --> 00:18:40,170
I'll take care of you.
143
00:19:32,810 --> 00:19:35,874
Good thing we weren't extra sausage.
144
00:20:33,658 --> 00:20:35,658
I'm gonna come over to the couch.
145
00:20:37,158 --> 00:20:39,158
Let's play a game, okay?
146
00:20:39,658 --> 00:20:41,658
I'll be the pizza and you eat me.
147
00:20:42,158 --> 00:20:44,658
Sounds good to me, buddy.
Works with me, buddy.
148
00:21:03,402 --> 00:21:04,402
Oh, God.
149
00:21:37,426 --> 00:21:39,425
Isn't it fun?
150
00:21:39,426 --> 00:21:41,426
Mm-hmm. Uh-huh.
151
00:22:04,090 --> 00:22:06,090
Don't I have beautiful boobies?
152
00:22:08,090 --> 00:22:11,226
Dude, dude, dude. Excellent.
153
00:22:18,634 --> 00:22:19,634
Here's sausage.
154
00:23:56,826 --> 00:23:59,238
Switch!
155
00:24:02,266 --> 00:24:03,266
Yeah!
156
00:24:03,266 --> 00:24:04,266
Dude!
157
00:25:03,034 --> 00:25:05,744
Mmmmm.
158
00:25:51,226 --> 00:25:53,225
I think I did better than
the whole football team.
159
00:25:53,226 --> 00:25:55,226
Yeah!
160
00:26:11,226 --> 00:26:13,226
Oh yeah.
161
00:28:00,698 --> 00:28:02,697
Oh yeah.
162
00:28:02,698 --> 00:28:05,090
Switch, dude!
163
00:28:10,714 --> 00:28:13,714
Excellent, dude.
164
00:29:31,706 --> 00:29:37,386
Mmmmm.
165
00:30:14,754 --> 00:30:21,753
Hey, you just had an organism.
166
00:30:21,754 --> 00:30:24,753
Pizza twins, we deliver!
167
00:30:24,754 --> 00:30:27,754
Excellent, dude.
168
00:30:41,722 --> 00:30:48,721
Hey, Dweeb, pour me
some of that cereal, too.
169
00:30:48,722 --> 00:30:49,722
Yeah, sure thing, now.
170
00:30:58,170 --> 00:31:00,169
Breakfast of champions.
171
00:31:00,170 --> 00:31:02,169
Yes.
172
00:31:02,170 --> 00:31:05,626
I sure hope daddy gets a job soon.
173
00:31:06,626 --> 00:31:08,625
There's nothing good to eat around here.
174
00:31:08,626 --> 00:31:11,626
And this cocoa chocolate is stale.
175
00:31:12,626 --> 00:31:15,626
Yeah, I'm getting tired of pizza twins too.
176
00:31:20,490 --> 00:31:21,490
Me too.
177
00:31:21,491 --> 00:31:24,489
Phone rings.
178
00:31:24,490 --> 00:31:28,121
Hello?
179
00:31:28,122 --> 00:31:29,122
I'm not here.
180
00:31:29,123 --> 00:31:31,121
Yeah, she's right here.
181
00:31:31,122 --> 00:31:33,121
I'm not here, pizza face.
182
00:31:33,122 --> 00:31:34,122
Pizza slut.
183
00:31:34,123 --> 00:31:36,121
Go marry her, Ian.
184
00:31:36,122 --> 00:31:39,121
Hi, this is Kelly's answering machine.
185
00:31:39,122 --> 00:31:41,555
Kelly's not here right
now, so if you leave a
186
00:31:41,567 --> 00:31:44,121
message after the beep,
she'll get back to you.
187
00:31:44,122 --> 00:31:46,122
Beep!
188
00:31:53,306 --> 00:31:56,305
How's it going, daddy?
Have you found a job yet?
189
00:31:56,306 --> 00:31:58,305
Oh yeah.
190
00:31:58,306 --> 00:32:01,305
Yeah, it's going great, you know.
191
00:32:01,306 --> 00:32:06,305
I mean, I could be better than
hanging around a blood bank all day,
192
00:32:06,306 --> 00:32:10,305
talking about the current
market value of bodily fluids,
193
00:32:10,306 --> 00:32:17,305
about being poked and siphoned
dry by my own two-ton secretary.
194
00:32:17,306 --> 00:32:20,305
Life's just great.
195
00:32:20,306 --> 00:32:24,305
I think she meant your real job, dad.
196
00:32:24,306 --> 00:32:27,306
That's just it, dad.
197
00:32:28,306 --> 00:32:31,305
We need to have a family meeting.
198
00:32:31,306 --> 00:32:33,305
Now, who's missing?
199
00:32:33,306 --> 00:32:37,305
Hal, you stopped up the plumbing again.
200
00:32:37,306 --> 00:32:40,305
Never mind that, Meg.
201
00:32:40,306 --> 00:32:42,305
I have something very important to say.
202
00:32:42,306 --> 00:32:45,305
Now, everyone sit down on the couch.
203
00:32:45,306 --> 00:32:47,305
Sit down on the couch now.
204
00:32:47,306 --> 00:32:50,306
Come on, get over there.
205
00:32:54,970 --> 00:32:57,969
Macy, yesterday I had a vision.
206
00:32:57,970 --> 00:33:00,969
It was right after I gave
my eighth pint of blood,
207
00:33:00,970 --> 00:33:04,969
and just before my three o'clock blackout.
208
00:33:04,970 --> 00:33:07,969
Suddenly it came to me.
209
00:33:07,970 --> 00:33:11,969
If each member of this
family went out and got a job,
210
00:33:11,970 --> 00:33:14,969
this family would make it over the top.
211
00:33:14,970 --> 00:33:18,969
Is that all, Hal? I thought you
had something important to say.
212
00:33:18,970 --> 00:33:20,969
I'm serious, Meg.
213
00:33:20,970 --> 00:33:24,969
Now, you're all going to have to help out.
214
00:33:24,970 --> 00:33:27,969
Yeah, right, dad.
215
00:33:27,970 --> 00:33:31,969
It's either all for one or
everyone for themselves.
216
00:33:31,970 --> 00:33:34,969
I think you gave one too
many pints of blood, Hal.
217
00:33:34,970 --> 00:33:36,969
That's it.
218
00:33:36,970 --> 00:33:40,969
From now on, it's every man for himself.
219
00:33:40,970 --> 00:33:43,969
I'm out of here.
220
00:33:43,970 --> 00:33:45,970
See you later.
221
00:33:49,298 --> 00:33:52,297
Do you think he's really serious, mom?
222
00:33:52,298 --> 00:33:55,297
I don't know, dear, but just
in case we better humor him.
223
00:33:55,298 --> 00:33:57,297
Hey, you kids run along.
224
00:33:57,298 --> 00:34:00,298
Mommy has things to take care of.
225
00:34:05,754 --> 00:34:08,254
Hello, you stop and we pop a plummy?
226
00:34:19,658 --> 00:34:20,957
Trouble with your pipes, ma'am?
227
00:34:20,958 --> 00:34:21,958
You betcha!
228
00:34:21,959 --> 00:34:23,957
Aren't you the pizza man?
229
00:34:23,958 --> 00:34:26,957
Well, yes, but this is my day job.
230
00:34:26,958 --> 00:34:29,957
Hey, how do you plan on
paying for this anyways?
231
00:34:29,958 --> 00:34:30,958
Is your daughter here?
232
00:34:31,958 --> 00:34:35,150
Don't you worry about her.
233
00:34:36,150 --> 00:34:38,150
Mama has a better payment plan.
234
00:34:39,150 --> 00:34:40,150
I like this house.
235
00:35:17,250 --> 00:35:18,250
I'll pay for it.
236
00:35:22,834 --> 00:35:23,834
Oh, good.
237
00:36:01,658 --> 00:36:05,658
Show me what kind of tools you got.
238
00:36:06,658 --> 00:36:08,658
Oh yes.
239
00:36:31,762 --> 00:36:33,762
Oh yes.
240
00:36:34,762 --> 00:36:36,762
Oh yes.
241
00:36:37,762 --> 00:36:39,762
Oh yes.
242
00:36:40,762 --> 00:36:42,762
Oh yes.
243
00:36:43,762 --> 00:36:45,762
Oh yes.
244
00:36:46,762 --> 00:36:48,762
Oh yes.
245
00:36:49,762 --> 00:36:51,762
Oh yes.
246
00:36:52,762 --> 00:36:56,594
Oh yes.
247
00:36:57,594 --> 00:36:59,594
Oh yes.
248
00:37:00,594 --> 00:37:03,050
Oh yes.
249
00:37:08,466 --> 00:37:10,466
Oh yes.
250
00:37:15,914 --> 00:37:18,818
Yes.
251
00:37:27,802 --> 00:37:30,402
Oh, my God.
252
00:39:40,890 --> 00:39:44,738
Um
253
00:41:59,122 --> 00:42:00,122
Yeah.
254
00:42:00,122 --> 00:42:01,122
Yeah, fuck me.
255
00:42:05,914 --> 00:42:13,425
Ah, man, I'm deeper, you...
256
00:42:13,426 --> 00:42:21,426
Ah, ah, ah, man, ah, ah, ah, ah...
257
00:44:54,522 --> 00:44:56,522
Oh yeah.
258
00:45:24,250 --> 00:45:27,250
Oh, shit.
259
00:45:33,946 --> 00:45:41,946
Oh, yeah. Come over.
260
00:46:22,042 --> 00:46:27,297
Oh, it's funny.
261
00:46:27,298 --> 00:46:28,298
Yeah.
262
00:46:32,634 --> 00:46:34,634
I love this family.
263
00:46:36,634 --> 00:46:42,073
I guess I'll go take care
of those pipes now, huh?
264
00:46:42,074 --> 00:46:44,074
Yes.
265
00:46:47,658 --> 00:46:51,658
Do a good job on those as you did on mine.
266
00:46:52,658 --> 00:46:54,658
Sure thing, Miss Undie.
267
00:47:00,258 --> 00:47:04,258
Okay, you guys, get ready. Have
a seat, make yourself at home.
268
00:47:05,258 --> 00:47:10,257
You're gonna love this masterpiece.
If you love Nelly Does the Band,
269
00:47:10,258 --> 00:47:17,257
Nelly in the boys' room, this is gonna
blow your fucking socks off, dude.
270
00:47:17,258 --> 00:47:19,258
Hit it, dude.
271
00:47:22,258 --> 00:47:27,257
Okay, get ready. Hey, wait a
minute. Cough up the money first.
272
00:47:27,258 --> 00:47:29,258
Oh, man.
273
00:47:30,258 --> 00:47:37,058
Good. Thank you. Thank you.
274
00:47:38,058 --> 00:47:40,058
Hit it, dude. Showtime.
275
00:47:42,058 --> 00:47:44,642
Oh, man.
276
00:47:45,642 --> 00:47:47,641
I like this shot right here. Look at this.
277
00:47:47,642 --> 00:47:50,642
Dude, this is great.
Oh, I went out of focus.
278
00:47:52,642 --> 00:47:53,642
Oh, man.
279
00:47:56,642 --> 00:47:58,641
Dude, this is a freak.
280
00:47:58,642 --> 00:47:59,642
This is a freak.
281
00:47:59,643 --> 00:48:01,642
Tell me something I don't know.
282
00:48:04,194 --> 00:48:06,194
Oh, man. Check it out.
283
00:48:07,194 --> 00:48:09,193
Okay, now look at this shot.
284
00:48:09,194 --> 00:48:12,193
Dirt on her head and the plant.
285
00:48:12,194 --> 00:48:15,194
Kind of jumps and
explodes against each other.
286
00:48:16,194 --> 00:48:18,193
Oh, man. Right now.
287
00:48:18,194 --> 00:48:20,193
Dude, this is just bad.
288
00:48:20,194 --> 00:48:21,194
Oh, yeah.
289
00:48:22,194 --> 00:48:23,297
Yeah.
290
00:48:23,298 --> 00:48:25,297
She can take that whole thing.
291
00:48:25,298 --> 00:48:26,298
Oh, man.
292
00:48:26,299 --> 00:48:28,297
Oh, this is great, man.
293
00:48:28,298 --> 00:48:30,297
Oh, man. The camera shook off.
294
00:48:30,298 --> 00:48:32,298
I bumped it up against the table.
295
00:48:34,298 --> 00:48:35,434
Look at that.
296
00:48:37,434 --> 00:48:39,433
It came out better than I expected.
297
00:48:39,434 --> 00:48:40,434
Oh, man.
298
00:48:40,434 --> 00:48:41,434
Oh, shit.
299
00:48:41,434 --> 00:48:42,434
What the fuck's that, dude?
300
00:48:42,434 --> 00:48:43,434
Check it out.
301
00:48:43,434 --> 00:48:44,434
Oh, man. Look at that.
302
00:48:46,434 --> 00:48:47,434
Hello.
303
00:48:47,435 --> 00:48:49,434
Hi. It's Natalie here.
304
00:48:50,434 --> 00:48:53,434
Oh, no, sweet thing, but Dr. Dutt is.
305
00:48:54,434 --> 00:48:56,433
Oh, you're so cute.
306
00:48:56,434 --> 00:48:58,434
Too bad you're not a real man.
307
00:49:00,434 --> 00:49:02,434
Yeah, well, look.
308
00:49:03,434 --> 00:49:08,538
Does a real man carry
around a wand like this?
309
00:49:09,538 --> 00:49:12,537
Well, if you're such a real man,
310
00:49:12,538 --> 00:49:15,538
why don't you tell your friends
to go and you'll stay a while.
311
00:49:17,538 --> 00:49:18,538
Guys.
312
00:49:18,538 --> 00:49:19,538
Yo, guys.
313
00:49:20,538 --> 00:49:22,537
Gotta go.
314
00:49:22,538 --> 00:49:23,538
Come on.
315
00:49:24,538 --> 00:49:28,049
Same time, same place.
316
00:49:28,050 --> 00:49:29,050
Oh, man.
317
00:49:30,050 --> 00:49:32,049
Couple of bigos here.
318
00:49:32,050 --> 00:49:34,049
See you out there.
319
00:49:34,050 --> 00:49:35,050
Out.
320
00:49:35,050 --> 00:49:36,050
Goodbye.
321
00:49:36,051 --> 00:49:38,050
Yes, thank you for this.
322
00:49:40,050 --> 00:49:41,050
Now, where were we?
323
00:49:42,050 --> 00:49:45,050
You were gonna show us what a man you are.
324
00:49:46,050 --> 00:49:47,050
Oh, yeah.
325
00:49:48,050 --> 00:49:51,050
Well, it's adjourned up to my love chamber.
326
00:49:53,050 --> 00:49:54,050
Well, check it out.
327
00:50:07,226 --> 00:50:09,226
Dud the Stud's Boudoir.
328
00:50:10,226 --> 00:50:11,226
I don't care.
329
00:50:14,226 --> 00:50:16,226
Oh, let's see the goodies, ladies.
330
00:50:25,914 --> 00:50:27,913
Have you been a good little girl?
331
00:50:27,914 --> 00:50:28,914
Yeah.
332
00:50:28,915 --> 00:50:30,914
Oh, too bad.
333
00:50:33,914 --> 00:50:34,914
Let me help you with that.
334
00:50:34,915 --> 00:50:36,914
Just, uh, get in your working clothes.
335
00:50:40,914 --> 00:50:41,914
Hello.
336
00:50:42,914 --> 00:50:43,914
Hello.
337
00:50:44,914 --> 00:50:45,914
Tie you up.
338
00:50:46,914 --> 00:50:49,913
You don't charge extra for that, do you?
339
00:50:49,914 --> 00:50:51,913
No, I'm healthy.
340
00:50:51,914 --> 00:50:52,914
Yes.
341
00:50:54,914 --> 00:50:56,914
Let me help you with this.
342
00:51:00,914 --> 00:51:01,914
Come here.
343
00:51:02,914 --> 00:51:03,914
It's a pleasure.
344
00:51:15,914 --> 00:51:16,914
Yeah.
345
00:51:16,915 --> 00:51:18,913
Yeah, we'll get it.
346
00:51:18,914 --> 00:51:19,914
We'll get it.
347
00:51:20,914 --> 00:51:21,914
Here, I'll help you.
348
00:51:44,186 --> 00:51:46,186
Oh, you're a good boy.
349
00:51:49,626 --> 00:51:51,626
What a big coffee you have, bud.
350
00:52:00,746 --> 00:52:02,746
For such a little boy.
351
00:52:21,834 --> 00:52:27,466
Oh, you're so good, bud.
352
00:52:49,434 --> 00:52:51,434
Oh yeah.
353
00:53:32,410 --> 00:53:34,410
Mm, like a house.
354
00:53:35,410 --> 00:53:36,410
Yeah.
355
00:53:37,410 --> 00:53:38,410
Ooh, yeah.
356
00:53:41,410 --> 00:53:42,410
Get that.
357
00:53:46,658 --> 00:53:47,658
Yeah.
358
00:53:51,658 --> 00:53:53,402
Yeah.
359
00:53:54,402 --> 00:53:55,402
Ooh, yeah.
360
00:53:56,402 --> 00:53:58,402
That's so good.
361
00:53:59,402 --> 00:54:01,722
Oh, yeah.
362
00:54:02,722 --> 00:54:05,265
Like it. Yeah.
363
00:54:05,266 --> 00:54:08,266
Stick your tongue in me. Yeah.
364
00:54:09,266 --> 00:54:10,266
Oh, yeah.
365
00:54:17,266 --> 00:54:18,530
Oh, yeah.
366
00:54:19,530 --> 00:54:20,530
Yes.
367
00:54:37,594 --> 00:54:45,594
Yeah, yeah, yeah, oh yeah, oh, oh yeah.
368
00:56:55,674 --> 00:56:57,674
Oh, wow.
369
00:57:00,026 --> 00:57:03,026
Oh, wow.
370
00:57:05,058 --> 00:57:07,058
Oh, wow.
371
00:57:11,834 --> 00:57:15,834
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
372
00:57:38,202 --> 00:57:39,202
Oh yeah.
373
00:58:40,602 --> 00:58:46,038
I don't know.
374
00:59:59,386 --> 01:00:07,386
Oh yeah.
375
01:00:49,562 --> 01:00:52,006
Yeah, yeah.
376
01:00:55,386 --> 01:00:57,385
Yeah! Yeah!
377
01:00:57,386 --> 01:00:58,386
Mother bed!
378
01:00:58,387 --> 01:01:01,385
Yeah! Oh yeah! Yeah! Yeah!
379
01:01:01,386 --> 01:01:02,386
Yeah!
380
01:01:02,387 --> 01:01:04,385
Ah! Harder, harder, harder!
381
01:01:04,386 --> 01:01:06,385
Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!
382
01:01:06,386 --> 01:01:08,385
It's fucking me hard!
383
01:01:08,386 --> 01:01:10,386
It hurts me! Yeah! Yeah!
384
01:01:16,762 --> 01:01:24,762
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
385
01:02:15,146 --> 01:02:18,146
Yeah, yeah, oh, yeah, oh, yeah, oh, yeah.
386
01:02:21,646 --> 01:02:22,646
Yeah, woo!
387
01:02:31,146 --> 01:02:32,646
Oh, my God.
388
01:02:35,146 --> 01:02:36,146
How's my pussy?
389
01:02:51,034 --> 01:02:59,034
Help me!
390
01:03:07,162 --> 01:03:10,161
Yeah.
391
01:03:10,162 --> 01:03:13,161
Help me, Dad.
392
01:03:13,162 --> 01:03:14,162
Hit him harder.
393
01:03:59,610 --> 01:04:01,610
Come on, Dad.
394
01:04:09,946 --> 01:04:10,946
Oh, yeah.
395
01:04:10,947 --> 01:04:12,946
Come on.
396
01:04:23,482 --> 01:04:24,482
Geez.
397
01:04:30,146 --> 01:04:31,146
Oof.
398
01:04:37,946 --> 01:04:42,066
Dad, Dad. I feel bad,
Dad. I'll call you little
399
01:04:42,078 --> 01:04:45,946
boy again. That's a
dad. Thank you. I wonder
400
01:04:53,330 --> 01:05:01,330
why your parents named him Dad. It's an old
family name. Short for Dudsworth. Thanks,
401
01:05:07,250 --> 01:05:10,930
Dad. I'll call again
sometime. Work on shopping.
402
01:05:34,234 --> 01:05:37,233
Hey, buddy.
403
01:05:37,234 --> 01:05:40,233
You're lucky you were gone.
404
01:05:40,234 --> 01:05:42,234
What's this?
405
01:05:43,234 --> 01:05:47,562
Dear Hal, your dinner's at the market.
406
01:05:52,634 --> 01:06:00,634
Stay at the market, Peg.
407
01:06:07,234 --> 01:06:08,514
Stay late as you want.
408
01:06:24,654 --> 01:06:25,950
Yeah.
409
01:10:43,290 --> 01:10:45,290
Go away. Don't go away.
410
01:11:06,682 --> 01:11:08,682
It's better be good.
411
01:11:12,378 --> 01:11:14,217
Hal, you have to do something
about that wife of yours.
412
01:11:14,218 --> 01:11:15,537
She's a menace to the neighborhood.
413
01:11:15,538 --> 01:11:18,818
There isn't a man safe as long as that
red-headed barracuda is swimming around.
414
01:11:20,338 --> 01:11:24,018
I mean, just a few minutes ago,
I was lying by my pool, relaxing,
415
01:11:24,618 --> 01:11:30,658
casually admiring my pool man slowly
dip his long pole into my swimming pool,
416
01:11:31,778 --> 01:11:34,338
sweeping it side to side.
417
01:11:35,978 --> 01:11:37,618
And then I turned around and he was gone.
418
01:11:37,778 --> 01:11:39,938
And all I found was a
couple of red hairs in his neck.
419
01:11:40,818 --> 01:11:44,817
Gee, Marsha, did anybody ever tell you your
breasts look a little bit in that color?
420
01:11:44,818 --> 01:11:46,817
Gee, you think so, Hal?
421
01:11:46,818 --> 01:11:47,818
Oh, yeah.
422
01:11:49,818 --> 01:11:54,618
Is that a wallet in your pocket,
or are you just happy to see me?
423
01:11:55,618 --> 01:11:57,618
I haven't had a wallet for years.
424
01:11:59,618 --> 01:12:03,650
So, uh, put your stuff inside, Marsha, Hal.
425
01:12:05,650 --> 01:12:09,578
That's inside Hal's love palace.
426
01:12:16,890 --> 01:12:19,090
You look as good as in your pool for years.
427
01:12:25,082 --> 01:12:29,082
Ah, yeah.
428
01:12:32,522 --> 01:12:34,522
Sometimes life is better
than dreaming, you know.
429
01:12:53,466 --> 01:12:56,466
Ah, yeah.
430
01:13:12,482 --> 01:13:13,482
Good.
431
01:13:16,098 --> 01:13:19,234
Good.
432
01:13:26,970 --> 01:13:34,970
Oh, oh yeah.
433
01:13:45,514 --> 01:13:51,018
Mm, oh yeah.
434
01:13:52,018 --> 01:13:55,242
Put your hand on my cock, will ya?
435
01:13:56,242 --> 01:14:00,946
When I was a kid, usually my hand, but.
436
01:14:01,946 --> 01:14:04,434
Oh yeah.
437
01:14:05,434 --> 01:14:06,434
Yeah.
438
01:14:11,098 --> 01:14:16,098
Oh, yeah.
439
01:14:19,098 --> 01:14:21,097
Get your eye out, Meg.
440
01:14:21,098 --> 01:14:22,098
Where are you going?
441
01:14:23,098 --> 01:14:24,098
Over there.
442
01:14:24,098 --> 01:14:25,098
Over there?
443
01:14:25,099 --> 01:14:27,097
All right.
444
01:14:27,098 --> 01:14:30,098
All right, I'll come over there.
445
01:14:31,098 --> 01:14:34,138
I'll come over anywhere you want.
446
01:14:37,746 --> 01:14:39,746
You're a native, baby.
447
01:14:40,746 --> 01:14:42,745
I'll be your pool man.
448
01:14:42,746 --> 01:14:45,745
I'll slowly stir my long pole and...
449
01:14:45,746 --> 01:14:48,745
What the fuck are you saying?
450
01:14:48,746 --> 01:14:49,746
Uh-huh.
451
01:15:04,042 --> 01:15:07,401
We're lucky girlfriends, too.
452
01:15:07,402 --> 01:15:09,401
Yeah.
453
01:15:09,402 --> 01:15:12,762
Like you and Sue.
454
01:15:24,922 --> 01:15:26,922
What happened?
455
01:15:40,922 --> 01:15:42,921
Am I still with you?
456
01:15:42,922 --> 01:15:44,921
Do you mind playing with your pussy?
457
01:15:44,922 --> 01:15:46,921
I can never get Meg to do that.
458
01:15:46,922 --> 01:15:49,922
She never can get her to play with my dick.
459
01:15:50,922 --> 01:15:54,281
I just like the way that looks.
460
01:15:54,282 --> 01:15:58,418
I never get my head down there.
461
01:16:02,418 --> 01:16:05,417
Must get real hot laying by that bull, huh?
462
01:16:05,418 --> 01:16:08,418
Get all sweaty and sticky.
463
01:16:11,418 --> 01:16:13,417
What if I clean you off?
464
01:16:13,418 --> 01:16:14,418
Yeah.
465
01:16:31,018 --> 01:16:34,017
I'm surprised I even let her do this.
466
01:16:34,018 --> 01:16:36,018
Like a bike.
467
01:17:30,042 --> 01:17:31,042
Yeah.
468
01:18:03,706 --> 01:18:04,706
Yeah.
469
01:18:49,338 --> 01:18:50,338
Yeah.
470
01:19:15,802 --> 01:19:19,801
Peter!
471
01:19:19,802 --> 01:19:27,802
Oh, Marcia, I want to see your ass.
472
01:19:31,258 --> 01:19:33,257
I see your ass.
473
01:19:33,258 --> 01:19:36,417
Oh yeah.
474
01:19:36,418 --> 01:19:38,417
You wanna fuck.
475
01:19:38,418 --> 01:19:40,490
I'm gonna fuck your ass.
476
01:20:35,418 --> 01:20:43,418
Oh, yeah.
477
01:20:49,434 --> 01:20:50,993
Get a load of that noise.
478
01:20:50,994 --> 01:20:53,033
Oh, God.
479
01:20:53,034 --> 01:20:54,153
It will take me for a ride.
480
01:20:54,154 --> 01:20:55,154
Oh, God.
481
01:20:55,634 --> 01:20:56,634
Oh, God.
482
01:20:58,870 --> 01:21:00,870
Oh, God.
483
01:21:01,370 --> 01:21:02,870
Oh, yeah.
484
01:21:04,870 --> 01:21:07,870
Oh, oh, oh, oh, yeah.
485
01:22:23,290 --> 01:22:26,289
Hey, you still got it, Undy.
486
01:22:26,290 --> 01:22:28,289
Hey, you still got it.
487
01:22:28,290 --> 01:22:31,289
Yes, now you got it,
Marcia, but you loved it.
488
01:22:31,290 --> 01:22:33,290
Hey, you loved it.
489
01:22:37,290 --> 01:22:40,290
That's better than TV.
490
01:22:44,858 --> 01:22:48,846
Four, three, seven,
one, three, eight, one,
491
01:22:48,858 --> 01:22:52,858
three, nine, three,
two, three, two, three,
492
01:22:55,858 --> 01:22:57,857
just like your father said.
493
01:22:57,858 --> 01:22:59,857
I think this one's counterfeit.
494
01:22:59,858 --> 01:23:01,857
Hey, where'd you get the money?
495
01:23:01,858 --> 01:23:03,857
We got jobs, pal.
496
01:23:03,858 --> 01:23:05,857
Yeah, Dad, we all got our own jobs.
497
01:23:05,858 --> 01:23:09,857
I'm now an up-and-coming film director.
498
01:23:09,858 --> 01:23:13,857
Look, Daddy, I'm a model.
499
01:23:13,858 --> 01:23:18,857
My photographer says I'm a natural.
500
01:23:18,858 --> 01:23:22,857
I can do it at will, you know.
501
01:23:22,858 --> 01:23:25,857
Nellie, come over here right now.
502
01:23:25,858 --> 01:23:31,857
What, Daddy?
503
01:23:31,858 --> 01:23:36,697
Now, Nellie, honey, you
can't do this nude modeling.
504
01:23:36,698 --> 01:23:38,697
It's important for your future.
505
01:23:38,698 --> 01:23:41,697
Now, take your mother, for example.
506
01:23:41,698 --> 01:23:46,833
Had she posed nude, she'd just be a...
507
01:23:46,834 --> 01:23:49,833
Well, your mother's not
really a good example.
508
01:23:49,834 --> 01:23:52,833
How much did they pay you
for this nude modeling, anyway?
509
01:23:52,834 --> 01:24:00,833
Well, Daddy, it's, for two
years, $280,000 a year.
510
01:24:00,834 --> 01:24:02,834
Let me see that.
511
01:24:08,770 --> 01:24:10,370
Now, now, now Nellie,
512
01:24:10,670 --> 01:24:11,969
you know my leg is in art form.
513
01:24:11,970 --> 01:24:15,169
I would let you start sooner, but your
mother in the county wouldn't let me.
514
01:24:15,170 --> 01:24:19,170
Now, you may need a manager, someone you
can trust, maybe even a family member, huh?
515
01:24:19,770 --> 01:24:22,170
It's too late now. I've already cut a deal.
516
01:24:22,570 --> 01:24:23,870
Come over here, dear.
517
01:24:24,770 --> 01:24:26,370
Come on, keep counting your money.
518
01:24:30,454 --> 01:24:32,454
Oh, uh, Kelly, honey,
519
01:24:32,854 --> 01:24:35,154
you can lend a few bucks to
your dear old dad, can't you?
520
01:24:35,754 --> 01:24:39,554
Sorry, daddy, my photographer
says I need it for facials and manicures.
521
01:24:41,026 --> 01:24:42,626
Son, what about you, son?
522
01:24:43,826 --> 01:24:45,626
Dad, as you've always said,
523
01:24:45,826 --> 01:24:47,426
every man for himself.
524
01:24:47,626 --> 01:24:48,626
Forget it.
525
01:24:51,082 --> 01:24:52,082
Meg?
526
01:24:53,378 --> 01:24:55,178
You know what you gotta do, Hal?
527
01:24:55,778 --> 01:24:57,977
And this time I want a
full minute and a half.
528
01:24:57,978 --> 01:24:59,578
Oh, God.
529
01:25:00,378 --> 01:25:01,778
Help me!
530
01:25:04,602 --> 01:25:06,002
I'd better get my camera.
531
01:25:08,002 --> 01:25:09,002
Oh, God.
532
01:25:19,018 --> 01:25:20,217
Oh, thanks, dude.
533
01:25:20,218 --> 01:25:21,417
Hey, where's my...
534
01:25:21,418 --> 01:25:22,418
Oh, I mean...
535
01:25:22,418 --> 01:25:23,218
Oh, whoa.
536
01:25:23,218 --> 01:25:23,818
Yeah.
537
01:25:23,819 --> 01:25:25,018
Oh, Tommy.
538
01:25:26,618 --> 01:25:27,618
Oh, shit.
539
01:25:28,618 --> 01:25:30,017
Wait, my name is Dud.
540
01:25:30,018 --> 01:25:31,018
That's good.
541
01:25:34,218 --> 01:25:35,218
Okay, keep going, come on.
542
01:25:35,219 --> 01:25:36,617
Okay, position one.
543
01:25:36,618 --> 01:25:37,618
Okay.
544
01:25:38,018 --> 01:25:40,018
It came out better than I expected.
545
01:25:40,418 --> 01:25:41,018
Oh, man.
546
01:25:41,018 --> 01:25:41,818
Oh, shit.
547
01:25:41,818 --> 01:25:42,818
What the fuck's that, dude?
548
01:25:42,819 --> 01:25:44,218
Oh, man, look at that.
549
01:25:46,418 --> 01:25:47,418
Yes?
550
01:25:47,419 --> 01:25:48,618
Is Kelly here?
551
01:25:49,618 --> 01:25:53,018
Uh, no, actually, Nellie's not home.
552
01:25:54,018 --> 01:25:56,217
Uh, but, uh, we gotta do that again.
553
01:25:56,218 --> 01:25:57,418
I'm gonna go get my shoes.
554
01:25:59,218 --> 01:26:00,618
Girls, knock on the door.
555
01:26:02,418 --> 01:26:03,818
Oh, shoot.
556
01:26:07,418 --> 01:26:08,418
Oh, hello there.
557
01:26:08,419 --> 01:26:09,818
Hi, is Nellie here?
558
01:26:10,418 --> 01:26:14,618
Uh, no, sweet thing, but Dr. Dud is in.
559
01:26:16,218 --> 01:26:18,017
Fucking doorstop under the building.
560
01:26:18,018 --> 01:26:18,818
Here we go.
561
01:26:18,818 --> 01:26:19,818
Nellie.
562
01:26:21,618 --> 01:26:23,017
Nellie, don't forget.
563
01:26:23,018 --> 01:26:24,418
I just met Nellie.
564
01:26:25,018 --> 01:26:26,617
Yes, that was very good.
565
01:26:26,618 --> 01:26:27,618
Okay, ready?
566
01:26:30,818 --> 01:26:34,617
Oh, I thought they were all
fake, but then they actually...
567
01:26:34,618 --> 01:26:36,418
Oh, be good, Sam.
568
01:26:37,218 --> 01:26:38,218
Here we go, Ann.
569
01:26:41,026 --> 01:26:43,426
Nothing exciting like
that ever happens to us.
570
01:26:45,426 --> 01:26:49,026
Girls, there's something I should
tell you while you're still single.
571
01:26:49,826 --> 01:26:52,626
Now, you're gonna be faced
with some very important decisions.
572
01:26:56,730 --> 01:26:57,530
Let me do this again.
573
01:26:57,530 --> 01:26:58,130
No, no, no.
574
01:26:58,131 --> 01:27:01,730
There's something very important that I
want to tell you while you're still single.
575
01:27:02,330 --> 01:27:05,930
Now, there's some very important
decisions that you're gonna make.
576
01:27:10,802 --> 01:27:11,802
Yes, Mom?
577
01:27:14,122 --> 01:27:15,922
George, wait, can I do this?
578
01:27:16,322 --> 01:27:17,322
Just go from there.
579
01:27:17,323 --> 01:27:19,321
You click it, and then
you turn to the girls.
580
01:27:19,322 --> 01:27:20,322
Okay.
581
01:27:21,322 --> 01:27:22,322
Now, you got speed.
582
01:27:23,322 --> 01:27:24,322
Action.
583
01:27:24,922 --> 01:27:28,322
Girls, there's something I'm gonna
tell you while you're still single.
584
01:27:30,122 --> 01:27:31,122
There's...
585
01:27:31,522 --> 01:27:32,522
Try it, tell them to stop.
586
01:27:32,523 --> 01:27:34,321
Girls, there's something I should
tell you while you're still single.
587
01:27:34,322 --> 01:27:36,482
Now that you're getting
older, let me tell them again.
588
01:27:36,722 --> 01:27:40,722
Girls, there's something I'm gonna
tell you while you're still single.
589
01:27:41,122 --> 01:27:42,122
There's many...
590
01:27:42,122 --> 01:27:43,122
Wait, George, what?
591
01:27:43,322 --> 01:27:45,322
Girls, there's something
I want to tell you.
592
01:27:47,922 --> 01:27:50,521
Now, you're gonna make
some very important decisions,
593
01:27:50,522 --> 01:27:52,921
and there's always gonna be
something holding you back.
594
01:27:52,922 --> 01:27:53,922
No, I'm gonna talk again.
595
01:27:53,922 --> 01:27:54,922
Fuck.
596
01:28:00,666 --> 01:28:02,666
Be patient.
597
01:28:07,130 --> 01:28:09,130
Girls, you're gonna be faced with...
598
01:28:11,258 --> 01:28:13,257
I don't know why I can't fucking get this.
599
01:28:13,258 --> 01:28:15,257
Girls, there's something I can't tell you.
600
01:28:15,258 --> 01:28:17,297
Why you're still single?
601
01:28:17,298 --> 01:28:19,298
You're gonna be faced with many decisions.
602
01:28:20,298 --> 01:28:22,297
Girls, there's something I should tell you.
603
01:28:22,298 --> 01:28:22,798
Yeah?
604
01:28:22,799 --> 01:28:24,297
That you're still single.
605
01:28:24,298 --> 01:28:26,298
Now you're gonna be faced with many...
606
01:28:28,370 --> 01:28:29,370
What's this?
607
01:28:31,370 --> 01:28:34,922
Dear Al, your market's at the dinner.
608
01:28:35,922 --> 01:28:36,922
Oh shit.
609
01:28:36,922 --> 01:28:37,922
I'm sorry.
610
01:28:37,923 --> 01:28:39,003
It's alright, it's alright.
41498
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