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1
00:00:03,000 --> 00:00:04,330
* My eyes aregettin' weary*
2
00:00:04,370 --> 00:00:07,130
* My back is gettin' tight*
3
00:00:07,170 --> 00:00:08,750
* I'm sittin' herein traffic*
4
00:00:08,800 --> 00:00:11,840
* On the Queensboro Bridgetonight*
5
00:00:11,880 --> 00:00:17,350
* But I don't care,'cause all I want to do*
6
00:00:17,390 --> 00:00:21,270
* Is cash my check and driveright home to you*
7
00:00:23,180 --> 00:00:24,980
* 'Cause, baby,all my life*
8
00:00:25,020 --> 00:00:29,190
* I will be drivin' hometo you*
9
00:00:57,800 --> 00:00:58,930
[TIRES SCREECH]
10
00:00:58,970 --> 00:01:01,100
[THUD]
11
00:01:01,930 --> 00:01:03,560
What the--
12
00:01:04,890 --> 00:01:06,600
[PEOPLE CHATTERING IN CHINESE]
13
00:01:06,640 --> 00:01:09,560
DOUG: Excuse me. Excuse me.
I'm sorry. Excuse me.
14
00:01:10,650 --> 00:01:12,190
Oh, my God.
15
00:01:13,690 --> 00:01:15,820
You saw. He ran right out
in front of me.
16
00:01:15,860 --> 00:01:20,370
Oh, my God.
Come on. Come on.
17
00:01:21,120 --> 00:01:23,080
Don't you die on me!
18
00:01:23,120 --> 00:01:24,120
[CHICKEN CLUCKING]
19
00:01:24,160 --> 00:01:26,500
Oh. He's...he's okay.
20
00:01:26,540 --> 00:01:29,330
Does anybody know
who he belongs to?
21
00:01:45,810 --> 00:01:47,190
MR. KAUFMAN: Hold it.
22
00:01:47,230 --> 00:01:49,980
Oh. Mr. Kaufman.
23
00:01:50,020 --> 00:01:51,820
Carrie.
24
00:01:52,820 --> 00:01:55,650
I guess I'm not the only
one late today, huh?
25
00:01:55,690 --> 00:01:57,820
I got here at 6 A.M.
26
00:01:57,860 --> 00:01:58,990
Mmm.
27
00:01:59,030 --> 00:02:00,450
What you got there,
a book?
28
00:02:00,490 --> 00:02:03,240
Oh. "The Contortionist'sDaughter."
29
00:02:03,280 --> 00:02:05,120
It follows
a bedridden professor
30
00:02:05,160 --> 00:02:06,450
and his growing
disillusionment
31
00:02:06,500 --> 00:02:10,040
in 17th-century
Prussia.
32
00:02:10,080 --> 00:02:12,840
Ooh. That sounds
fascinating.
33
00:02:12,880 --> 00:02:14,550
Well...then here.
34
00:02:14,590 --> 00:02:16,090
-What?
-I just finished it
35
00:02:16,130 --> 00:02:17,970
this morning.
You can have my copy.
36
00:02:18,010 --> 00:02:19,180
Oh, no, no, no, no.
37
00:02:19,220 --> 00:02:21,140
Oh, please. I'd love
to have someone
38
00:02:21,180 --> 00:02:22,470
to discuss it with.
39
00:02:22,510 --> 00:02:24,350
My wife thinks
1,100 pages
40
00:02:24,390 --> 00:02:26,560
is too long
for a book.
41
00:02:26,600 --> 00:02:30,190
Sometimes I forget
she's only 29.
42
00:02:30,730 --> 00:02:32,980
Well...enjoy.
43
00:02:33,020 --> 00:02:34,520
Will do.
44
00:02:35,150 --> 00:02:36,900
Crap.
45
00:02:41,160 --> 00:02:42,990
What do you mean
you don't take chickens?
46
00:02:43,030 --> 00:02:44,660
You're animal control.
47
00:02:44,700 --> 00:02:46,240
I betcha if I had
a dog or a cat,
48
00:02:46,290 --> 00:02:48,200
you'd be rolling out
the red carpet.
49
00:02:48,250 --> 00:02:50,790
Hello? Hello?
50
00:02:53,290 --> 00:02:57,840
So, uh...should I
drop you off here or...?
51
00:03:02,510 --> 00:03:05,560
"As Yergen applied an ointment
to his withered leg,
52
00:03:05,600 --> 00:03:09,430
"he thought back to his days
as an apprentice baker.
53
00:03:09,480 --> 00:03:13,730
The first bread Yergen made
was a pumpernickel."
54
00:03:16,940 --> 00:03:19,360
How long is this recipe?
55
00:03:20,780 --> 00:03:22,910
Hey. I'm home.
56
00:03:23,700 --> 00:03:24,700
CARRIE: Hey.
57
00:03:24,740 --> 00:03:25,950
[SIGHS]
58
00:03:25,990 --> 00:03:27,990
Where you been? I had
dinner ready for 2 hours.
59
00:03:28,040 --> 00:03:29,500
You wouldn't
believe my day.
60
00:03:29,540 --> 00:03:31,750
I had to drive all the way
up to Plattsburg.
61
00:03:31,790 --> 00:03:33,080
What?
62
00:03:33,120 --> 00:03:35,290
Crazy story. I'm delivering
in Chinatown, right?
63
00:03:35,340 --> 00:03:37,000
-And all of a sudden--
-Ah, good.
64
00:03:37,050 --> 00:03:39,670
It's still
nice and juicy.
65
00:03:39,710 --> 00:03:42,630
* I see the crystalraindrops fall*
66
00:03:42,680 --> 00:03:44,890
* And the beautyof it all*
67
00:03:44,930 --> 00:03:49,600
* When the suncomes shining through*
68
00:03:49,640 --> 00:03:52,480
* To make those rainbowsin my mind*
69
00:03:52,520 --> 00:03:54,810
* When I think of yousometime*
70
00:03:54,850 --> 00:03:58,940
* And I want to spendsome time with you*
71
00:03:58,980 --> 00:04:01,440
* Just the two of us*
72
00:04:01,490 --> 00:04:03,990
* We can make itif we try*
73
00:04:04,030 --> 00:04:06,490
* Just the two of us*
74
00:04:06,530 --> 00:04:09,040
* Just the two of us*
75
00:04:09,080 --> 00:04:11,290
* Just the two of us*
76
00:04:11,330 --> 00:04:13,580
* Building castlesin the sky*
77
00:04:13,620 --> 00:04:18,840
* Just the two of us,you and I*
78
00:04:22,300 --> 00:04:24,380
Stop it!
79
00:04:24,430 --> 00:04:26,260
What's the matter
with you?
80
00:04:26,300 --> 00:04:28,600
I gotta get some air.
81
00:04:33,140 --> 00:04:34,770
Oh, my God.
82
00:04:35,730 --> 00:04:37,310
Hey, Doug.
83
00:04:37,860 --> 00:04:39,150
Hey, Glenn.
84
00:04:39,190 --> 00:04:40,940
What's wrong?
85
00:04:41,650 --> 00:04:43,610
Nothing.
It's stupid.
86
00:04:43,650 --> 00:04:45,660
Problems
aren't stupid.
87
00:04:45,700 --> 00:04:47,660
People who
ignore them are.
88
00:04:49,620 --> 00:04:52,660
It's just...today I helped
this injured chicken,
89
00:04:52,700 --> 00:04:55,210
and I sort of got
attached to him,
90
00:04:55,250 --> 00:04:57,250
and then when
I came home,
91
00:04:57,290 --> 00:04:59,170
Carrie had dinner
waiting for me.
92
00:04:59,210 --> 00:05:01,500
Let me guess.
Chicken?
93
00:05:02,550 --> 00:05:04,420
Yeah. I told you
it was stupid.
94
00:05:04,470 --> 00:05:07,140
No, Doug, it isn't.
95
00:05:07,180 --> 00:05:08,300
Do you have
any idea
96
00:05:08,350 --> 00:05:10,470
what goes on
at a poultry mill?
97
00:05:10,510 --> 00:05:12,560
It's barbaric.
98
00:05:12,600 --> 00:05:14,310
I guess I'm pretty much
done eating chicken.
99
00:05:14,350 --> 00:05:15,980
I'll tell you
that much.
100
00:05:16,020 --> 00:05:17,350
Hey, thank God I didn't
make friends with a cow.
101
00:05:17,400 --> 00:05:19,900
You know
what I'm saying? Heh.
102
00:05:19,940 --> 00:05:21,900
MALE NARRATOR:
After they're stunned,
103
00:05:21,940 --> 00:05:24,280
the cattle enterthe death chute,
104
00:05:24,320 --> 00:05:26,450
where they are killed,dismembered,
105
00:05:26,490 --> 00:05:30,030
and preparedfor processing.
106
00:05:30,080 --> 00:05:31,330
Is it almost over?
107
00:05:31,370 --> 00:05:33,750
Not until you learn
how hot dogs are made.
108
00:05:36,120 --> 00:05:39,040
It's okay.
It's okay, Doug.
109
00:05:41,800 --> 00:05:43,380
[SIGHS]
110
00:05:45,260 --> 00:05:46,340
What's the matter?
111
00:05:46,380 --> 00:05:47,680
Glenn just showed me
some movie
112
00:05:47,720 --> 00:05:49,090
about how meat
is made,
113
00:05:49,140 --> 00:05:51,050
and now
I can't eat it.
114
00:05:51,100 --> 00:05:52,560
Come on.
115
00:05:52,600 --> 00:05:53,770
Carrie, I'm serious.
116
00:05:53,810 --> 00:05:55,140
I was just down
in the refrigerator.
117
00:05:55,180 --> 00:05:57,060
You know what I ate?
An apple!
118
00:05:57,980 --> 00:05:59,560
Oh, my God.
119
00:06:00,400 --> 00:06:02,610
And a Yodel,
but still, I just...
120
00:06:03,650 --> 00:06:04,820
Doug, I don't understand.
121
00:06:04,860 --> 00:06:06,530
You eat fast food
2 or 3 times a week.
122
00:06:06,570 --> 00:06:09,820
It never occurred to you
that animals were involved?
123
00:06:09,860 --> 00:06:11,700
Because they don't make
it look like an animal.
124
00:06:11,740 --> 00:06:14,490
They're very clever
that way.
125
00:06:16,200 --> 00:06:17,580
What...
what are you doing?
126
00:06:17,620 --> 00:06:19,000
Just talk about meat
and do stuff to me, okay?
127
00:06:19,040 --> 00:06:20,540
I got to link it
to something good again.
128
00:06:20,580 --> 00:06:24,590
No. Okay, as flattering
as that is,
129
00:06:24,630 --> 00:06:26,260
I have another idea.
130
00:06:26,300 --> 00:06:28,380
Why don't you just
stop eating meat?
131
00:06:28,430 --> 00:06:29,880
I mean, you had
an apple, right?
132
00:06:29,930 --> 00:06:30,800
Oh, Carrie, no.
133
00:06:30,840 --> 00:06:33,890
My body tried
to reject it.
134
00:06:33,930 --> 00:06:36,810
Thank God the Yodel
kept it down.
135
00:06:37,930 --> 00:06:41,480
Doug, maybe this whole
thing is fate, you know,
136
00:06:41,520 --> 00:06:44,320
a chance for you
to start eating better.
137
00:06:44,360 --> 00:06:46,820
You know, stick around
a little longer...
138
00:06:46,860 --> 00:06:48,610
and burp less.
139
00:06:49,700 --> 00:06:51,910
I guess I could try.
I mean, you know...
140
00:06:51,950 --> 00:06:53,620
I've eaten meat
for over 40 years.
141
00:06:53,660 --> 00:06:56,450
It's not like they're
coming out with anything new.
142
00:06:59,540 --> 00:07:02,500
Come on. We've been here
all night.
143
00:07:02,540 --> 00:07:04,250
Any new burger ideas at all?
144
00:07:04,290 --> 00:07:05,460
Okay.
145
00:07:05,500 --> 00:07:07,260
How about we revisit
the Miami Stacker?
146
00:07:07,300 --> 00:07:09,420
We've been over that
a dozen times.
147
00:07:09,470 --> 00:07:11,510
No bun in the world
could support 5 patties.
148
00:07:11,550 --> 00:07:13,510
-It's just physics.
-Yeah.
149
00:07:13,550 --> 00:07:15,100
Yeah, you're right.
Nobody wants a burger
150
00:07:15,140 --> 00:07:16,970
that keeps falling down.
151
00:07:19,020 --> 00:07:21,230
Pen. Pen.
152
00:07:28,740 --> 00:07:31,820
"The Leaning Tower
of Pizza Burger."
153
00:07:31,860 --> 00:07:35,740
The bottom bun
is a mini pizza.
154
00:07:43,630 --> 00:07:46,090
I guess the old dog still has
one more trick in him.
155
00:07:46,130 --> 00:07:47,090
God, I love you.
156
00:07:47,130 --> 00:07:48,840
What?
Nothing.
157
00:07:55,220 --> 00:07:56,430
Well, look at you,
158
00:07:56,470 --> 00:07:58,430
enjoying
your tofu sausage
159
00:07:58,470 --> 00:08:00,230
and "I can't believe
they're not eggs."
160
00:08:00,270 --> 00:08:01,640
Yep.
161
00:08:01,690 --> 00:08:03,140
You know what makes
them taste better?
162
00:08:03,190 --> 00:08:05,480
Knowing I'm doing
the right thing...
163
00:08:05,520 --> 00:08:08,190
and a buttload
of hot sauce.
164
00:08:09,900 --> 00:08:12,650
I am really proud
of you, honey.
165
00:08:12,700 --> 00:08:15,530
Ah, it's no big deal,
really.
166
00:08:20,450 --> 00:08:22,540
When did you
get glasses?
167
00:08:22,580 --> 00:08:24,670
The doctor said I probably
needed them for years,
168
00:08:24,710 --> 00:08:27,090
but I didn't know it
until I started reading
169
00:08:27,130 --> 00:08:29,050
all the stuff
that Glenn gave me.
170
00:08:30,710 --> 00:08:33,880
Russian river, 5 letters.
171
00:08:36,300 --> 00:08:37,890
Volga.
172
00:08:44,350 --> 00:08:45,940
What?
173
00:08:45,980 --> 00:08:46,810
It's nothing.
174
00:08:46,860 --> 00:08:48,900
No, come on.
What? Tell me.
175
00:08:48,940 --> 00:08:50,190
It's just...
176
00:08:50,230 --> 00:08:53,070
you probably shouldn't
be drinking coffee.
177
00:08:53,860 --> 00:08:56,070
Why? Is there
meat in it? Heh.
178
00:08:57,620 --> 00:08:59,620
No, but the people
who pick the beans
179
00:08:59,660 --> 00:09:02,830
work under
very terrible conditions.
180
00:09:02,870 --> 00:09:06,620
Juan Valdez, that nice
guy with the donkey...
181
00:09:06,670 --> 00:09:09,590
he's an actor, Carrie.
I know that now.
182
00:09:27,480 --> 00:09:30,190
Wow. Page 480.
183
00:09:30,230 --> 00:09:31,900
You're almost
halfway through.
184
00:09:31,940 --> 00:09:35,490
Oh. I just can't seem
to put it down.
185
00:09:35,530 --> 00:09:37,450
You know, they should
make this into a movie.
186
00:09:37,490 --> 00:09:38,450
Have they?
187
00:09:38,490 --> 00:09:41,120
Oh, no.
It's considered unfilmable.
188
00:09:41,160 --> 00:09:43,910
Listen, we're having
a little shindig on Saturday
189
00:09:43,950 --> 00:09:46,710
to celebrate the opening
of Seven Water Plaza.
190
00:09:46,750 --> 00:09:48,290
I'd love
for you to come.
191
00:09:48,330 --> 00:09:51,210
Really? I thought that was
just for the partners
192
00:09:51,250 --> 00:09:54,010
and, you know, big shots.
193
00:09:54,670 --> 00:09:56,970
It is. Ha ha ha.
194
00:09:57,010 --> 00:09:58,510
Got to have
my book buddy there.
195
00:09:58,550 --> 00:10:01,640
We're going to have
a lot to talk about.
196
00:10:04,180 --> 00:10:05,980
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
197
00:10:06,020 --> 00:10:07,850
-Dugan Group.
-DOUG: Hey, babe.
198
00:10:07,890 --> 00:10:09,480
Hey, honey.
What's going on?
199
00:10:09,520 --> 00:10:11,560
Uh, nothing. Just telling younot to fill up on anything
200
00:10:11,610 --> 00:10:16,030
because for dinner,
I'm making bean steaks.
201
00:10:18,110 --> 00:10:21,530
Again? Ha ha ha.
202
00:10:21,570 --> 00:10:23,910
Yummy!
203
00:10:23,950 --> 00:10:26,120
Oh, actually,
I just remembered.
204
00:10:26,160 --> 00:10:28,080
I have to work
late tonight.
205
00:10:28,120 --> 00:10:29,920
-Really?
-Yeah.
206
00:10:29,960 --> 00:10:32,000
Oh, all right. Well,
if you get hungry,
207
00:10:32,040 --> 00:10:33,290
just look
in your purse.
208
00:10:33,340 --> 00:10:35,010
I put in
some snap peas.
209
00:10:35,050 --> 00:10:37,050
Yeah.
210
00:10:37,090 --> 00:10:38,170
Yeah, I saw that.
211
00:10:38,220 --> 00:10:39,300
But next time,
you might want to
212
00:10:39,340 --> 00:10:42,140
put them
in a little baggie.
213
00:10:43,010 --> 00:10:44,350
DOUG: Not biodegradable.
214
00:10:44,390 --> 00:10:46,390
Okay. I got to go, babe.
215
00:10:54,020 --> 00:10:55,110
DEACON: Hi, Carrie.
216
00:10:55,150 --> 00:10:57,240
What are you
doing here?
217
00:10:57,280 --> 00:10:58,610
Please don't tell Doug.
218
00:10:58,650 --> 00:11:02,030
I just needed to eat
something with a face.
219
00:11:02,070 --> 00:11:04,450
What's going on
with him, anyway?
220
00:11:04,490 --> 00:11:07,120
He just found something
that he's passionate about.
221
00:11:07,160 --> 00:11:09,330
It just so happens
that it's a little annoying.
222
00:11:09,370 --> 00:11:11,290
A little annoying?
Can you tell him
223
00:11:11,330 --> 00:11:12,960
to stop throwing
paint on my pants?
224
00:11:13,000 --> 00:11:15,630
He thinks corduroy
is an animal.
225
00:11:15,670 --> 00:11:17,090
-Hey.
-Hey.
226
00:11:17,130 --> 00:11:18,340
How's the new job?
227
00:11:18,380 --> 00:11:19,760
How do you think
it's going, man?
228
00:11:19,800 --> 00:11:21,680
I stand on the sidewalk
all day holding this.
229
00:11:21,720 --> 00:11:23,970
Yeah. Well, at least
no one's peeing on you,
230
00:11:24,010 --> 00:11:26,560
like when you worked
in the subway.
231
00:11:26,600 --> 00:11:28,430
Ha. Guess again.
232
00:11:28,480 --> 00:11:29,600
Uh...
233
00:11:29,640 --> 00:11:32,690
Oh! "The Contortionist'sDaughter."
234
00:11:32,730 --> 00:11:34,440
I heard a really good
review of this
235
00:11:34,480 --> 00:11:37,230
on NPR's "Book Nook"
the other day.
236
00:11:37,280 --> 00:11:38,530
-Really?
-Yeah.
237
00:11:38,570 --> 00:11:41,530
Hey, um...any chance
you want to read it
238
00:11:41,570 --> 00:11:42,990
and write a little
summary for me?
239
00:11:43,030 --> 00:11:44,410
Please. It would
help me out so much.
240
00:11:44,450 --> 00:11:46,200
I'd love to, but I don't
have the time.
241
00:11:46,240 --> 00:11:48,620
I have to be out
with my sign all week.
242
00:11:50,710 --> 00:11:54,790
Free phone. Free phone.
Free...phone.
243
00:11:59,670 --> 00:12:02,130
[CHUCKLING]
244
00:12:03,340 --> 00:12:05,600
Classic Yergen.
245
00:12:08,220 --> 00:12:10,390
-Oh, hey, babe.
-Hey.
246
00:12:10,430 --> 00:12:12,600
Oh, just so you know,
for our anniversary,
247
00:12:12,640 --> 00:12:14,850
I made reservations
at the Sproutback.
248
00:12:14,900 --> 00:12:17,320
Is that okay?
249
00:12:17,360 --> 00:12:19,570
Spence finished
the book already?
250
00:12:19,610 --> 00:12:23,150
No. He said he couldn't
get past page 5.
251
00:12:24,160 --> 00:12:25,990
Now I'm glad
I got him fired.
252
00:12:26,030 --> 00:12:27,490
Yeah.
253
00:12:27,530 --> 00:12:29,120
I don't know
what his problem is.
254
00:12:29,160 --> 00:12:31,620
I got to tell you,
it's pretty interesting.
255
00:12:31,660 --> 00:12:33,000
You're reading it?
256
00:12:33,040 --> 00:12:34,290
Yeah. First
hundred pages
257
00:12:34,330 --> 00:12:35,580
starts out
a little rough,
258
00:12:35,630 --> 00:12:37,460
but once you realize
it's meant to be
259
00:12:37,500 --> 00:12:40,710
allegorical, it's
a real page-turner.
260
00:12:42,170 --> 00:12:43,880
Hey, honey, any chance
you can finish this book
261
00:12:43,930 --> 00:12:47,350
by Kaufman's party
on Saturday and fill me in?
262
00:12:48,050 --> 00:12:49,060
Yeah, I guess.
263
00:12:49,100 --> 00:12:50,180
Oh, speaking
of the party,
264
00:12:50,220 --> 00:12:51,680
I got you something to wear.
265
00:12:51,730 --> 00:12:53,810
-Oh, really?
-Yeah.
266
00:12:55,900 --> 00:12:58,190
Check it out.
267
00:13:03,650 --> 00:13:05,200
Read the label.
268
00:13:05,240 --> 00:13:08,950
It's 100% pure
unprocessed hemp.
269
00:13:10,870 --> 00:13:13,200
It's from the Woody
Harrelson Collection.
270
00:13:14,370 --> 00:13:16,540
Honey, I appreciate all this.
I really do.
271
00:13:16,580 --> 00:13:18,420
But I think you're throwing
a lot at me at once.
272
00:13:18,460 --> 00:13:19,960
I mean, I'm just
getting used
273
00:13:20,000 --> 00:13:22,590
to the "one flush a day"
rule, so...
274
00:13:22,630 --> 00:13:26,970
But you are...you're
gonna wear it, right?
275
00:13:28,430 --> 00:13:30,640
Yes. You keep reading
that book, baby,
276
00:13:30,680 --> 00:13:32,100
and I'm going to
try it on
277
00:13:32,140 --> 00:13:33,220
for you right now.
278
00:13:33,270 --> 00:13:34,430
-All right.
-Okay.
279
00:13:34,480 --> 00:13:36,810
-That's my girl.
-Yeah.
280
00:13:38,020 --> 00:13:40,570
"Size--human."
281
00:13:57,710 --> 00:14:01,250
You're always worried about
someone wearing the same dress.
282
00:14:01,290 --> 00:14:03,130
Not tonight.
283
00:14:03,170 --> 00:14:04,710
All right. All right.
Forget about the dress.
284
00:14:04,760 --> 00:14:06,260
I want to go over
the notes you gave me
285
00:14:06,300 --> 00:14:07,680
for Kaufman, okay?
286
00:14:07,720 --> 00:14:10,430
Themes, symbolism,
bread as a motif.
287
00:14:10,470 --> 00:14:13,260
Is that how
you spell "motif"?
288
00:14:13,310 --> 00:14:15,600
What do you think?
289
00:14:15,640 --> 00:14:17,520
-Carrie. Doug.
-CARRIE: Oh!
290
00:14:17,560 --> 00:14:18,650
-Glad you could make it.
-CARRIE: Hey!
291
00:14:18,690 --> 00:14:20,770
You remember
my wife Amy.
292
00:14:20,810 --> 00:14:21,650
Hey.
293
00:14:21,690 --> 00:14:23,070
Yes. Of course.
294
00:14:23,110 --> 00:14:26,190
She was our intern
last summer. Ha ha.
295
00:14:26,240 --> 00:14:28,410
-Bacon-wrapped scallop?
-Amy made them.
296
00:14:28,450 --> 00:14:32,120
She's taking classes down
at the culinary institute.
297
00:14:32,160 --> 00:14:33,280
Have one.
298
00:14:33,330 --> 00:14:35,370
No. That's okay.
Thank you.
299
00:14:35,410 --> 00:14:36,870
You're not
hungry, Doug?
300
00:14:36,910 --> 00:14:39,670
Actually, I'm very hungry.
It's just, uh...
301
00:14:39,710 --> 00:14:42,710
mmm...I'm a vegetarian.
302
00:14:44,050 --> 00:14:46,670
Honey, it's just
a little itty-bitty thing.
303
00:14:46,720 --> 00:14:48,720
Why don't you
just have one?
304
00:14:48,760 --> 00:14:51,180
I'm afraid I don't
eat animals...
305
00:14:51,220 --> 00:14:54,390
especially when they're
wrapped in other animals.
306
00:14:54,430 --> 00:14:55,890
Well, I think
there's some melon.
307
00:14:55,930 --> 00:14:57,390
I'll pick off
the prosciutto.
308
00:14:57,430 --> 00:15:00,230
-No, no. He's okay.
-Yeah, that's not gonna work.
309
00:15:00,270 --> 00:15:03,440
You know what? I'll go
empty out some mushroom caps.
310
00:15:03,480 --> 00:15:04,690
Just make sure
there's no remnants.
311
00:15:04,730 --> 00:15:06,320
Okay? No remnants.
312
00:15:06,360 --> 00:15:08,070
So, Carrie,
have you finished
313
00:15:08,110 --> 00:15:10,950
"The Contortionist'sDaughter"yet?
314
00:15:10,990 --> 00:15:14,450
Finished it?
Devoured it. Ha!
315
00:15:14,490 --> 00:15:16,160
And...?
316
00:15:16,200 --> 00:15:17,700
Loved it!
317
00:15:17,750 --> 00:15:18,960
I knew you would.
318
00:15:19,000 --> 00:15:23,170
Yeah. You know
what I realized?
319
00:15:23,210 --> 00:15:25,550
Yergen was never as free
320
00:15:25,590 --> 00:15:27,920
as when he was
confined to that bed.
321
00:15:27,960 --> 00:15:31,510
Yes! And what about
his obsession
322
00:15:31,550 --> 00:15:34,100
with the umbrella?
What was that all about?
323
00:15:34,140 --> 00:15:36,010
Oh. Oh, yeah.
The umbrella...
324
00:15:36,060 --> 00:15:39,640
Um...was his need
for shelter...
325
00:15:39,680 --> 00:15:42,440
in a...
in an unfriendly world.
326
00:15:42,480 --> 00:15:45,520
How astute.
Well, I'm glad
327
00:15:45,570 --> 00:15:47,480
you enjoyed it
as much as I did.
328
00:15:47,530 --> 00:15:48,610
Oh, yes, I did.
329
00:15:48,650 --> 00:15:50,070
I'll tell you
something.
330
00:15:50,110 --> 00:15:51,780
There's nothing
I enjoy more
331
00:15:51,820 --> 00:15:53,870
than curling up
with a good book
332
00:15:53,910 --> 00:15:55,620
and a nice cup
of coffee.
333
00:15:55,660 --> 00:15:57,370
Mm-hmm.
334
00:15:59,620 --> 00:16:03,290
Doug, I was really scoring some
big points on that stupid book.
335
00:16:03,330 --> 00:16:05,710
And then you had to go on
ranting to Mr. Kaufman
336
00:16:05,750 --> 00:16:09,050
about Juan Valdez
and his donkey.
337
00:16:09,090 --> 00:16:13,010
I wasn't ranting.
I was educating.
338
00:16:13,050 --> 00:16:14,800
Sweet. My seeds
are here.
339
00:16:14,840 --> 00:16:17,640
Hello,
fresh radishes.
340
00:16:17,680 --> 00:16:19,470
Enough already.
341
00:16:19,520 --> 00:16:20,560
What is
your problem?
342
00:16:20,600 --> 00:16:22,100
What's my problem?
343
00:16:22,140 --> 00:16:25,020
Okay. Well, ever since
you stopped eating meat
344
00:16:25,060 --> 00:16:29,070
and started reading,
you've been acting like an ass.
345
00:16:29,110 --> 00:16:30,820
Okay? How long are you
going to keep this up?
346
00:16:30,860 --> 00:16:34,070
Okay. First of all,
don't like the language.
347
00:16:35,450 --> 00:16:38,830
Second of all,
this is forever.
348
00:16:38,870 --> 00:16:40,080
This is for life.
349
00:16:40,120 --> 00:16:43,080
Oh my God,
would you stop it already?
350
00:16:43,120 --> 00:16:44,580
-Stop what?
-That whole thing
351
00:16:44,620 --> 00:16:45,830
where you say something
352
00:16:45,880 --> 00:16:47,880
and then pause
for emphasis
353
00:16:47,920 --> 00:16:49,500
and then say
the same exact thing
354
00:16:49,550 --> 00:16:53,430
only slightly differently.
It's so sickening, man.
355
00:16:54,800 --> 00:16:56,590
I get it.
356
00:16:56,640 --> 00:16:59,220
You're...you're
threatened by me.
357
00:16:59,260 --> 00:17:00,020
What?
358
00:17:00,060 --> 00:17:01,680
Yeah.
That's right.
359
00:17:01,730 --> 00:17:03,640
Because...[CLEARS THROAT]
360
00:17:03,690 --> 00:17:06,190
I am evolving,
361
00:17:06,230 --> 00:17:07,690
and you--
362
00:17:07,730 --> 00:17:09,270
[SNAP]
363
00:17:13,360 --> 00:17:15,240
You...
364
00:17:16,360 --> 00:17:21,040
are remaining stagnant
in your ignorant ways.
365
00:17:21,080 --> 00:17:23,540
Okay. You know what?
I really--I had enough.
366
00:17:23,580 --> 00:17:24,710
That's it. Okay?
367
00:17:24,750 --> 00:17:26,960
I had enough
of the compost heaps
368
00:17:27,000 --> 00:17:28,290
and the straw mattress,
369
00:17:28,340 --> 00:17:30,170
and let me tell you
something else, buddy.
370
00:17:30,210 --> 00:17:33,340
Your reading days
are over. Yeah.
371
00:17:33,380 --> 00:17:35,510
Hey. Hey!
372
00:17:36,930 --> 00:17:39,510
Throw it out! Throw out
all the books you want!
373
00:17:39,550 --> 00:17:43,890
The new Doug Heffernan's here,
and he ain't going anywhere!
374
00:17:47,940 --> 00:17:49,440
So the numbers
are pretty clear,
375
00:17:49,480 --> 00:17:50,860
if you just...
if you just look
376
00:17:50,900 --> 00:17:51,900
at the comparison
between--
377
00:17:51,940 --> 00:17:53,610
-[AHEM]
-Yes? What is it?
378
00:17:53,650 --> 00:17:55,280
This is from my mole
at Ultra Burger.
379
00:17:55,320 --> 00:17:56,860
They've got
a whole new burger.
380
00:17:56,910 --> 00:17:59,660
They're taking it
national on May 1st.
381
00:17:59,700 --> 00:18:03,500
The bottom bun
is a pizza?
382
00:18:03,540 --> 00:18:05,330
Oh, my God.
383
00:18:06,540 --> 00:18:07,790
Okay. Listen up.
You all scrap
384
00:18:07,830 --> 00:18:09,500
whatever
you're working on.
385
00:18:09,540 --> 00:18:11,750
We're going to launch
our answer to this on the 1st.
386
00:18:11,800 --> 00:18:13,250
[WORKERS RESPOND POSITIVELY]
387
00:18:13,300 --> 00:18:15,670
If those bastards
want a burger war,
388
00:18:15,720 --> 00:18:17,930
we're going to
give them one.
389
00:18:23,600 --> 00:18:25,100
Ah...
390
00:18:26,310 --> 00:18:27,890
[CLEARS THROAT]
391
00:18:30,150 --> 00:18:31,690
MAN [OVER RADIO]:
[ITALIAN ACCENT] 5 patties?
392
00:18:31,730 --> 00:18:33,940
Mamma mia!That's a-gonna fall!
393
00:18:33,980 --> 00:18:35,690
MAN [OVER RADIO]: The LeaningTower of Pizza Burger,
394
00:18:35,740 --> 00:18:38,780
now at Ultra Burger.Prices may vary.
395
00:18:38,820 --> 00:18:40,700
[CHANGING RADIO STATIONS]
396
00:18:40,740 --> 00:18:42,490
MAN [SOUTHERN ACCENT]:
The Smokehouse--
397
00:18:42,530 --> 00:18:44,490
it ain't about layers.
398
00:18:44,540 --> 00:18:46,160
It's about flavor.
399
00:18:46,200 --> 00:18:49,170
One burgersmoked to perfection.
400
00:18:49,210 --> 00:18:52,210
Get it now at D.C. Jr.'s.
401
00:18:52,880 --> 00:18:54,380
[TURNS OFF RADIO]
402
00:18:55,510 --> 00:18:57,420
[ENGINE STARTS]
403
00:19:03,470 --> 00:19:04,970
MAN [OVER RADIO]:
[ITALIAN ACCENT] 5 patties?
404
00:19:05,020 --> 00:19:07,270
Mamma mia!That's a-gonna fall!
405
00:19:07,310 --> 00:19:09,520
MAN [OVER RADIO]: The LeaningTower of Pizza Burger,
406
00:19:09,560 --> 00:19:11,520
now at Ultra Burger.
407
00:19:28,500 --> 00:19:30,170
Aah!
408
00:19:30,210 --> 00:19:31,620
Hey.
409
00:19:31,670 --> 00:19:32,880
What are you doing?
410
00:19:32,920 --> 00:19:34,290
Carrie got me fired
from the other job,
411
00:19:34,340 --> 00:19:35,960
but this one's
so much better.
412
00:19:36,000 --> 00:19:37,460
Here. Have a coupon.
413
00:19:37,510 --> 00:19:38,720
Get away from me.
414
00:19:38,760 --> 00:19:40,180
Where are you going?
415
00:19:40,220 --> 00:19:42,970
I'll give you all
the coupons you want!
416
00:20:14,250 --> 00:20:15,670
Oh.
417
00:20:27,600 --> 00:20:29,140
Oh, yeah.
418
00:20:35,980 --> 00:20:38,860
[CHICKENS CLUCKING]
419
00:20:42,030 --> 00:20:43,610
He's okay.
420
00:20:43,660 --> 00:20:44,450
He's okay.
421
00:20:44,490 --> 00:20:46,990
* Just the two of us *
422
00:20:47,030 --> 00:20:49,330
* We can make itif we try*
423
00:20:49,370 --> 00:20:52,040
* Just the two of us*
424
00:20:52,080 --> 00:20:54,460
* Just the two of us*
425
00:20:54,500 --> 00:20:57,840
[**]
29809
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