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1
00:00:02,460 --> 00:00:05,210
[**]
2
00:00:07,170 --> 00:00:10,090
Doug, I'm back.
Sorry it took me so long.
3
00:00:10,130 --> 00:00:12,090
DOUG: It's okay.
Gotta level with you.
4
00:00:12,130 --> 00:00:13,470
I didn't know
you went anywhere.
5
00:00:14,720 --> 00:00:17,220
Hey, I dropped my dad off
at Mickey's
6
00:00:17,260 --> 00:00:19,060
and I brought the dog
to the kennel.
7
00:00:20,310 --> 00:00:21,810
Sweetie,
where are the bags?
8
00:00:21,850 --> 00:00:22,680
Deacon and Kelly
are gonna be here
9
00:00:22,730 --> 00:00:24,440
any minute
to pick us up.
10
00:00:24,480 --> 00:00:27,150
DOUG: Alright, I'm comin' down
right now, and I got 'em.
11
00:00:28,690 --> 00:00:29,860
Oh, God.
12
00:00:29,900 --> 00:00:31,360
What are you doing?
Make 2 trips.
13
00:00:31,400 --> 00:00:33,700
No, because I got them,
I got it. Out of the way.
14
00:00:38,410 --> 00:00:39,700
There you go.
Nice job, huh?
15
00:00:39,740 --> 00:00:41,790
Yeah, nice job,
but that there,
16
00:00:41,830 --> 00:00:44,080
that's our hamper.
17
00:00:44,120 --> 00:00:45,540
You put all the luggage
next to it.
18
00:00:45,580 --> 00:00:47,710
I just went in,
and I forklifted everything.
19
00:00:47,750 --> 00:00:49,290
Where are these guys
anyway?
20
00:00:49,340 --> 00:00:51,130
I want to get up there
before dinner.
21
00:00:51,170 --> 00:00:53,210
You see, that's the beauty
of taking a trip by car.
22
00:00:53,260 --> 00:00:54,800
You can change your mind
at the last minute,
23
00:00:54,840 --> 00:00:57,090
-go someplace else.
-Doug, don't start.
24
00:00:57,140 --> 00:00:58,890
Could you take
one more look at it, huh?
25
00:00:58,930 --> 00:01:01,560
Come on. Deluxe room,
Trump Tower and Casino.
26
00:01:01,600 --> 00:01:03,100
I'm not looking.
27
00:01:03,140 --> 00:01:05,350
$39 a night and...
28
00:01:05,390 --> 00:01:08,810
every room
has its own love tub.
29
00:01:08,860 --> 00:01:11,400
Doug, do you really want
to spend our anniversary
30
00:01:11,440 --> 00:01:12,900
at a craps table?
31
00:01:12,940 --> 00:01:16,200
There and in the love tub.
32
00:01:16,240 --> 00:01:17,490
Honey, this place
is supposed to be
33
00:01:17,530 --> 00:01:18,570
really nice.
34
00:01:18,620 --> 00:01:19,870
They have apple orchards
35
00:01:19,910 --> 00:01:21,790
and little brooks
with waterfalls.
36
00:01:21,830 --> 00:01:24,580
Hey, I bet ya 5 bucks
we see a bunny.
37
00:01:24,620 --> 00:01:26,330
I don't wanna see a bunny.
38
00:01:26,370 --> 00:01:29,460
I wanna 3 bunnies followed by
the sound of change dropping.
39
00:01:31,670 --> 00:01:33,340
Annoying.
Now, listen to me.
40
00:01:33,380 --> 00:01:36,170
I am going upstate
for a romantic weekend.
41
00:01:36,220 --> 00:01:37,260
You could come or not,
42
00:01:37,300 --> 00:01:39,640
but either way,
I'm gettin' some.
43
00:01:40,930 --> 00:01:42,600
Maybe I better be there
for that.
44
00:01:42,640 --> 00:01:44,100
Yeah. That's my boy. Okay.
45
00:01:44,140 --> 00:01:46,810
MALE SINGER: *My eyesare gettin' weary*
46
00:01:46,850 --> 00:01:49,900
*My back is gettin' tight*
47
00:01:49,940 --> 00:01:52,320
*I'm sitting herein traffic*
48
00:01:52,360 --> 00:01:54,570
*On the Queensboro Bridgetonight*
49
00:01:54,610 --> 00:01:59,910
*But I don't care'cause all I want to do*
50
00:01:59,950 --> 00:02:03,870
*Is cash my check and driveright home to you*
51
00:02:05,910 --> 00:02:07,830
*'Cause, baby,all my life*
52
00:02:07,870 --> 00:02:10,830
*I will be drivin' hometo you*
53
00:02:24,640 --> 00:02:27,980
Look at this:
apple soap, apple shampoo.
54
00:02:28,020 --> 00:02:31,060
These people took a theme
and really ran with it, huh?
55
00:02:31,100 --> 00:02:32,150
Uh-huh.
56
00:02:32,190 --> 00:02:34,150
Look, look, l-l-look.
57
00:02:34,190 --> 00:02:37,240
How do you like
them apples?
58
00:02:39,240 --> 00:02:40,990
All right, that's my joke
for the weekend,
59
00:02:41,030 --> 00:02:43,160
so get used to it.
60
00:02:43,200 --> 00:02:45,950
Oh, no. I think
I packed too fast.
61
00:02:45,990 --> 00:02:47,250
What do you mean?
62
00:02:47,290 --> 00:02:51,670
I have 7 T-shirts
and 12 pairs of socks.
63
00:02:51,710 --> 00:02:53,840
No pants and no underwear.
64
00:02:55,090 --> 00:02:56,170
Don't worry, honey.
65
00:02:56,210 --> 00:02:57,170
I packed you
some stuff.
66
00:02:57,210 --> 00:02:58,970
And look.
67
00:02:59,010 --> 00:03:00,970
What do you think
of this?
68
00:03:01,010 --> 00:03:04,720
Wow. I'm gonna have to diet
like a madman.
69
00:03:04,760 --> 00:03:06,180
Okay, do we get
the apple room,
70
00:03:06,220 --> 00:03:07,720
or is it
the whole place?
71
00:03:07,770 --> 00:03:09,230
Oh, God.
72
00:03:09,270 --> 00:03:11,600
I know.
Apples everywhere.
73
00:03:11,640 --> 00:03:13,690
And yet, the computer
at the front desk?
74
00:03:13,730 --> 00:03:14,730
IBM.
75
00:03:14,770 --> 00:03:16,230
Go figure.
76
00:03:16,270 --> 00:03:18,190
Hey, man, I got us
a 2:00 tee time.
77
00:03:18,230 --> 00:03:19,860
Cool.
78
00:03:19,900 --> 00:03:23,160
Wow. For a straight guy,
you pack a beautiful suitcase.
79
00:03:23,200 --> 00:03:25,330
Just like to keep things
organized.
80
00:03:25,370 --> 00:03:28,040
See, I got my dress pants
and dress shirts here,
81
00:03:28,080 --> 00:03:29,250
my golf shirts there,
82
00:03:29,290 --> 00:03:31,710
my dress socks,
golf socks, sweaters,
83
00:03:31,750 --> 00:03:33,750
T-shirts, vitamins.
84
00:03:33,790 --> 00:03:36,250
I have nothing to cover
the lower half of my body.
85
00:03:37,920 --> 00:03:39,710
I'm sure we can get
the other guests
86
00:03:39,760 --> 00:03:41,260
to chip in
and buy you something.
87
00:03:42,630 --> 00:03:44,220
Ah, look at this!
88
00:03:44,260 --> 00:03:46,180
Brought a little funk
to upstate, huh?
89
00:03:46,220 --> 00:03:49,310
Oh, yeah. Track one
is our special song,
90
00:03:49,350 --> 00:03:50,390
if you know
what I'm saying.
91
00:03:50,430 --> 00:03:52,310
Oh, yeah.
Music to shimmy by.
92
00:03:52,350 --> 00:03:54,230
That's what
I'm talking 'bout.
93
00:03:54,270 --> 00:03:56,980
[MARVIN GAYE'S
"LET'S GET IT ON"]
94
00:03:57,020 --> 00:04:02,900
*I've beenreally tryin', baby*
95
00:04:02,950 --> 00:04:08,910
*Tryin' to hold back thisfeeling for so long*
96
00:04:08,950 --> 00:04:13,120
*And if you feellike I feel, baby...*
97
00:04:14,460 --> 00:04:15,920
Should we cancel
the golf?
98
00:04:22,260 --> 00:04:24,090
Thanks again for dinner,
you guys.
99
00:04:24,130 --> 00:04:25,090
It's your anniversary.
100
00:04:25,140 --> 00:04:26,220
It's the least
we could do.
101
00:04:26,260 --> 00:04:27,850
That was very sweet.
Now, listen...
102
00:04:27,890 --> 00:04:30,100
do not get us a gift,
and I mean it.
103
00:04:30,140 --> 00:04:32,350
Um...we're not.
104
00:04:32,390 --> 00:04:33,810
Oh.
105
00:04:33,850 --> 00:04:35,230
Well, good.
106
00:04:37,270 --> 00:04:38,230
So...
107
00:04:39,320 --> 00:04:40,980
you starting to like
this place, hon?
108
00:04:41,030 --> 00:04:43,070
Yeah, it's okay.
A lot better than that resort
109
00:04:43,110 --> 00:04:44,950
we stayed at
in Florida last year.
110
00:04:44,990 --> 00:04:46,950
Oh, come on,
you can't compare the two.
111
00:04:46,990 --> 00:04:48,240
It's apples and oranges.
112
00:04:48,280 --> 00:04:50,240
Hah!
113
00:04:50,290 --> 00:04:53,290
What? Nothin' for that one,
either?
114
00:04:53,330 --> 00:04:55,710
There's no minibar key.
115
00:04:55,750 --> 00:04:56,880
Oh, I have that.
116
00:04:56,920 --> 00:04:58,290
Ah. Give it to me.
117
00:04:58,340 --> 00:05:00,130
No. You can't be trusted
with an open minibar.
118
00:05:00,170 --> 00:05:01,420
Would you give me
the key?
119
00:05:01,460 --> 00:05:03,470
No! Doug, remember last year
at the Marriott?
120
00:05:03,510 --> 00:05:04,840
I left you alone
for 2 minutes,
121
00:05:04,880 --> 00:05:08,470
and I found you passed out
on the $12 Bit-O-Honey.
122
00:05:08,510 --> 00:05:09,510
Come on. Give me the key,
123
00:05:09,550 --> 00:05:10,850
and we can get on
with our lives. Huh?
124
00:05:10,890 --> 00:05:12,180
No! Not so fast, buddy.
125
00:05:12,220 --> 00:05:14,350
No. How about this?
126
00:05:14,390 --> 00:05:17,350
You do a little something
to my satisfaction,
127
00:05:17,400 --> 00:05:21,150
and maybe I will
reward you with a treat.
128
00:05:22,110 --> 00:05:23,150
-Just give me the key.
-No.
129
00:05:23,190 --> 00:05:24,820
-Give me the key!
-Stop!
130
00:05:26,860 --> 00:05:28,110
["LET'S GET IT ON" PLAYING]
131
00:05:28,160 --> 00:05:32,290
*I been reallytryin', baby...*
132
00:05:34,950 --> 00:05:36,120
What is it?
133
00:05:36,160 --> 00:05:37,830
That's their song.
134
00:05:37,870 --> 00:05:39,000
What?
135
00:05:39,040 --> 00:05:40,340
Deacon and Kelly.
They play that music
136
00:05:40,380 --> 00:05:43,050
when they get
a little--hello...
137
00:05:44,460 --> 00:05:46,840
Oh...
138
00:05:46,880 --> 00:05:49,510
Oh, yeah. We have
cleared the tower.
139
00:05:49,550 --> 00:05:51,260
Don't listen!
140
00:05:51,300 --> 00:05:53,350
Godspeed,
Deacon Palmer.
141
00:05:55,060 --> 00:05:59,480
Doug, you really can't think
of anything better to do?
142
00:05:59,520 --> 00:06:01,820
Oh, yeah.
The minibar key.
143
00:06:01,860 --> 00:06:03,270
That's right.
144
00:06:03,320 --> 00:06:04,360
Now, why don't you
come over here
145
00:06:04,400 --> 00:06:08,070
and give meyour
minibar key?
146
00:06:11,870 --> 00:06:14,200
Sorry. I meant that cute,
but it came out hurtful.
147
00:06:14,240 --> 00:06:16,290
That's all right.
I'm shakin' it off.
148
00:06:16,330 --> 00:06:17,290
Okay.
149
00:06:21,960 --> 00:06:24,000
That was really something,
Dougie.
150
00:06:24,050 --> 00:06:25,050
Well, thank you.
151
00:06:25,090 --> 00:06:27,260
And you faked
more than usual tonight.
152
00:06:29,380 --> 00:06:31,510
Well, it is
our anniversary.
153
00:06:33,470 --> 00:06:36,270
So how's your
$7.00 bag of pretzels?
154
00:06:36,310 --> 00:06:37,390
Cheddar cheese
and honey pretzels,
155
00:06:37,430 --> 00:06:39,310
for your information.
156
00:06:39,350 --> 00:06:41,900
And not so good.
157
00:06:41,940 --> 00:06:43,900
Well, anyway,
you earned them.
158
00:06:45,360 --> 00:06:48,150
["LET'S GET IT ON" PLAYING]
159
00:06:48,190 --> 00:06:52,490
*I been reallytryin', baby... *
160
00:06:54,030 --> 00:06:55,870
Going for the repeat.
161
00:06:57,370 --> 00:06:59,460
Maybe they're just
playing the song again.
162
00:07:02,210 --> 00:07:04,340
Oh, gotta throw you a no
on that one.
163
00:07:04,380 --> 00:07:07,420
Stop! Stop listening!
Now, come on.
164
00:07:07,460 --> 00:07:09,800
We gotta get some sleep.
We got a big day tomorrow.
165
00:07:09,840 --> 00:07:11,430
What are we doing?
166
00:07:11,470 --> 00:07:13,930
After you play golf,
we're gonna go on a nature walk,
167
00:07:13,970 --> 00:07:17,810
canoeing, and we're gonna learn
how to make apple cider.
168
00:07:17,850 --> 00:07:20,140
Can't some things
just remain a mystery?
169
00:07:22,060 --> 00:07:23,190
Happy anniversary.
170
00:07:23,230 --> 00:07:24,520
-I love you.
-I love you, too.
171
00:07:24,560 --> 00:07:25,980
OK.
172
00:07:27,150 --> 00:07:29,570
*Let's get it on*
173
00:07:31,280 --> 00:07:33,320
*Whoo-hoo*
174
00:07:36,330 --> 00:07:38,540
["LET'S GET IT ON" PLAYING]
175
00:07:38,580 --> 00:07:44,540
*I've beenreally tryin', baby*
176
00:07:44,580 --> 00:07:50,510
*Tryin' to hold backthis feeling for so long*
177
00:07:50,550 --> 00:07:54,890
*And if you feellike I feel, baby...*
178
00:07:54,930 --> 00:07:56,100
What? What is it?
179
00:07:56,140 --> 00:07:57,010
Nothing. Nothing.
Go back to bed.
180
00:07:57,060 --> 00:07:59,140
*Oh, come on*
181
00:07:59,180 --> 00:08:00,350
*Whoo*
182
00:08:00,390 --> 00:08:02,230
*Let's get it on*
183
00:08:02,270 --> 00:08:05,520
-Big day tomorrow. Cider.
-Yeah, big day, big day.
184
00:08:05,560 --> 00:08:06,610
*Ah, babe*
185
00:08:06,650 --> 00:08:08,530
*Let's get it on*
186
00:08:08,570 --> 00:08:12,110
*Let's love, baby *
187
00:08:12,150 --> 00:08:15,070
*Let's get it on*
188
00:08:15,120 --> 00:08:17,200
*Sugar*
189
00:08:17,240 --> 00:08:19,910
*Let's get it on*
190
00:08:25,580 --> 00:08:27,210
[CHUCKLES]
191
00:08:29,420 --> 00:08:31,170
You should probably
start getting dressed.
192
00:08:31,210 --> 00:08:32,550
I told Kelly we would
meet them in the lobby at 9:00.
193
00:08:32,590 --> 00:08:34,380
Oh, right.
194
00:08:34,430 --> 00:08:35,470
Right.
195
00:08:36,590 --> 00:08:38,970
Uh, listen,
once again...
196
00:08:39,010 --> 00:08:41,890
last night
was very nice.
197
00:08:43,390 --> 00:08:46,900
And you were
extra special sexy.
198
00:08:46,940 --> 00:08:48,020
Oh, yeah?
199
00:08:48,060 --> 00:08:50,110
Well, you were
a real tiger.
200
00:08:50,150 --> 00:08:51,400
-You were.
-No, you were.
201
00:08:51,440 --> 00:08:53,570
All right. Let's just agree
we were both tigers.
202
00:08:53,610 --> 00:08:55,110
Okay.
203
00:08:55,160 --> 00:08:57,570
["LET'S GET IT ON" PLAYING]
204
00:09:04,290 --> 00:09:06,670
You can probably take your time
getting dressed.
205
00:09:16,470 --> 00:09:18,640
I hope they make it
in time for breakfast.
206
00:09:18,680 --> 00:09:20,390
Or at least in time
for lunch.
207
00:09:20,430 --> 00:09:23,390
-Ha ha ha!
-Ha ha ha!
208
00:09:46,160 --> 00:09:48,080
You two
wanna be alone?
209
00:09:48,120 --> 00:09:49,420
No, no. I'm just, uh,
210
00:09:49,460 --> 00:09:51,590
checking to see what kind
of apples they were.
211
00:09:53,420 --> 00:09:56,010
Just regular red ones.
212
00:09:56,050 --> 00:09:57,550
Sorry we're late.
213
00:09:57,590 --> 00:09:59,180
Oh, that's okay,
that's okay. No prob.
214
00:09:59,220 --> 00:10:01,220
It's hard to get going
in the morning, you know?
215
00:10:01,260 --> 00:10:02,100
So you wanna
hit the buffet?
216
00:10:02,140 --> 00:10:03,220
Yeah. I'm starving.
217
00:10:03,260 --> 00:10:04,680
Ooh. An omelet bar.
You with me?
218
00:10:04,720 --> 00:10:06,100
Yeah, let's do it.
219
00:10:10,020 --> 00:10:11,190
Mornin', my man.
220
00:10:11,230 --> 00:10:12,650
I'll have a 3-egg omelet
221
00:10:12,690 --> 00:10:16,070
with ham, tomato,
green peppers, and chives.
222
00:10:16,110 --> 00:10:18,110
Yeah, I'll have
the same.
223
00:10:18,150 --> 00:10:21,160
Oh. Oh, and mushrooms, too.
Yeah, and mushrooms, too.
224
00:10:22,280 --> 00:10:23,950
Sorry again about
being so late.
225
00:10:23,990 --> 00:10:26,120
Oh, that's okay.
226
00:10:26,160 --> 00:10:29,080
So, what was the hold-up?
227
00:10:29,120 --> 00:10:30,580
Lose a contact?
228
00:10:30,630 --> 00:10:34,340
Knot in a shoelace?
229
00:10:34,380 --> 00:10:36,550
No. Actually,
Deacon woke me up
230
00:10:36,590 --> 00:10:39,010
with a little
something-something on his mind.
231
00:10:39,050 --> 00:10:41,260
Oh, really?
232
00:10:41,300 --> 00:10:43,300
That's sweet.
233
00:10:44,510 --> 00:10:46,350
I guess being up here
away from the kids,
234
00:10:46,390 --> 00:10:49,350
you two finally have a chance
to go a little crazy, right?
235
00:10:50,770 --> 00:10:52,270
Not really.
236
00:10:52,310 --> 00:10:54,520
We manage to do
pretty well at home, too.
237
00:10:54,570 --> 00:10:56,990
Where there's a will,
there's a way, am I right?
238
00:10:58,820 --> 00:11:01,030
*Let's get it on*
239
00:11:01,070 --> 00:11:02,660
*Ow, baby*
240
00:11:02,700 --> 00:11:03,660
Mm!
241
00:11:03,700 --> 00:11:06,200
*Let's get it on*
242
00:11:06,240 --> 00:11:08,290
*Sugar*
243
00:11:08,330 --> 00:11:09,160
Whoo! Mmm!
244
00:11:09,210 --> 00:11:10,370
*Let's get it on*
245
00:11:10,420 --> 00:11:11,710
All right,
knock it off!
246
00:11:12,630 --> 00:11:14,090
Why?
247
00:11:14,130 --> 00:11:15,300
You're making me
look bad!
248
00:11:15,340 --> 00:11:16,550
What are you
talking about?
249
00:11:16,590 --> 00:11:18,550
You and Kelly
3 times last night,
250
00:11:18,590 --> 00:11:20,380
and then what was this
little thing this morning?
251
00:11:20,430 --> 00:11:21,470
What was that
all about?
252
00:11:21,510 --> 00:11:23,010
Were you just tryin'
to zetz me?
253
00:11:24,510 --> 00:11:26,810
So come on, there's gotta be
something up here
254
00:11:26,850 --> 00:11:28,390
that's getting you going?
255
00:11:28,430 --> 00:11:31,100
What is it?
The clean air, the water,
256
00:11:31,140 --> 00:11:33,150
apples turn you on?
What?
257
00:11:33,190 --> 00:11:35,480
No. What is going on
with you?
258
00:11:35,520 --> 00:11:37,650
Nothing.
259
00:11:37,690 --> 00:11:39,570
No, seriously, tell me.
260
00:11:39,610 --> 00:11:41,240
What's wrong?
261
00:11:42,860 --> 00:11:45,330
Well, I've always thought
that Doug and I
262
00:11:45,370 --> 00:11:47,120
had a good sex life,
263
00:11:47,160 --> 00:11:48,120
and I mean, we do,
264
00:11:48,160 --> 00:11:50,410
but I started
thinking that...
265
00:11:50,460 --> 00:11:53,830
maybe I just don't
turn Doug on anymore.
266
00:11:53,880 --> 00:11:56,380
I'm still really
turned on by her, Deac, I am.
267
00:11:56,420 --> 00:11:58,130
It's just that
you know what it is?
268
00:11:58,170 --> 00:12:00,380
I'm just built
to fire once.
269
00:12:01,720 --> 00:12:03,680
Like a musket.
270
00:12:06,220 --> 00:12:07,470
What do you want
from me?
271
00:12:07,510 --> 00:12:09,310
I guess I would just
feel better
272
00:12:09,350 --> 00:12:11,270
if Doug and I
were having more sex.
273
00:12:11,310 --> 00:12:12,600
I'd just feel better
if you and Kelly
274
00:12:12,640 --> 00:12:14,400
were having less sex.
275
00:12:20,150 --> 00:12:21,530
Okay, so we set aside
276
00:12:21,570 --> 00:12:25,200
a little too much time
to watch cider-making.
277
00:12:25,240 --> 00:12:26,530
I mean,
who'd have thought?
278
00:12:26,570 --> 00:12:27,700
It's basically just
279
00:12:27,740 --> 00:12:29,580
squeezing the crap
out of an apple.
280
00:12:31,830 --> 00:12:33,330
So what do you want to do now?
281
00:12:33,370 --> 00:12:34,540
You want to go for a walk?
282
00:12:34,580 --> 00:12:35,880
I don't know.
We were out all day.
283
00:12:35,920 --> 00:12:37,590
I'm kinda beat.
284
00:12:37,630 --> 00:12:40,300
-Wanna just hang out here?
-Yeah, I'm a little tired too.
285
00:12:40,340 --> 00:12:41,800
Hey, you wanna
watch a movie?
286
00:12:41,840 --> 00:12:43,630
Way ahead of ya.
287
00:12:43,680 --> 00:12:45,300
How aboutBloodsport?
288
00:12:45,340 --> 00:12:47,680
No. I read the book.
289
00:12:47,720 --> 00:12:49,850
Come on, honey,
pick a regular movie, will ya?
290
00:12:49,890 --> 00:12:51,390
I'm gonna go wash up.
291
00:12:53,180 --> 00:12:55,520
["LET'S GET IT ON" PLAYING]
292
00:12:55,560 --> 00:12:59,320
*I've beenreally tryin', baby*
293
00:13:01,280 --> 00:13:05,700
*Tryin' to hold backthis feelin' for so long*
294
00:13:05,740 --> 00:13:07,410
You're killin' me here!
295
00:13:07,450 --> 00:13:10,490
I thought you guys were out
watching 'em make cider.
296
00:13:10,540 --> 00:13:13,370
We got back early, all right?
It's a very simple process.
297
00:13:13,410 --> 00:13:15,500
Well, How was I supposed to know
you were back?
298
00:13:15,540 --> 00:13:16,920
Fine! Next time,
I'll put a tie on the door
299
00:13:16,960 --> 00:13:18,880
when Carrie and I
are insidenothaving sex!
300
00:13:18,920 --> 00:13:20,800
Okay, why don't you just
take it easy, huh?
301
00:13:20,840 --> 00:13:23,590
Me? You know,
I ask you one thing, you know.
302
00:13:23,630 --> 00:13:24,760
Stay away
from your wife.
303
00:13:24,800 --> 00:13:27,300
Is that too much?
304
00:13:27,340 --> 00:13:29,390
For your information,
this is not totally up to me.
305
00:13:29,430 --> 00:13:31,350
I mean, Kelly has a little bit
of say in this, too.
306
00:13:31,390 --> 00:13:33,350
Hey, she can't make you,
all right?
307
00:13:33,390 --> 00:13:34,600
No means no.
308
00:13:36,270 --> 00:13:37,440
What are those?
309
00:13:37,480 --> 00:13:38,900
My vitamins.
310
00:13:38,940 --> 00:13:40,610
Oh, no. No more
supersonic sex pills
311
00:13:40,650 --> 00:13:42,150
for you, my friend.
Come on.
312
00:13:42,190 --> 00:13:43,320
Get off.
313
00:13:44,990 --> 00:13:46,820
All right.
Great. Just great.
314
00:13:46,860 --> 00:13:49,280
Hey, you ever think
you can solve this
315
00:13:49,320 --> 00:13:50,780
by just having more sex
with your wife?
316
00:13:50,830 --> 00:13:52,740
Don't try and make this
about me.
317
00:13:52,790 --> 00:13:54,450
'Cause I'm tellin' you,
man, me and Kelly
318
00:13:54,500 --> 00:13:56,620
are going on a moonlight
boat ride tonight
319
00:13:56,670 --> 00:13:59,290
and having some brandies
by that fireplace downstairs,
320
00:13:59,330 --> 00:14:00,630
so when we
get back up here--
321
00:14:00,670 --> 00:14:02,420
Hey, enough!
322
00:14:04,840 --> 00:14:06,470
So this is the way
it's gonna be, huh?
323
00:14:06,510 --> 00:14:07,970
You're just gonna
continue on
324
00:14:08,010 --> 00:14:09,760
with this sick behavior?
325
00:14:11,350 --> 00:14:13,470
Yeah.
Look, I love my wife.
326
00:14:13,520 --> 00:14:15,390
I wanna enjoy her
and make her happy.
327
00:14:15,430 --> 00:14:18,350
Okay, good. Well,
thanks for nothin'.
328
00:14:22,690 --> 00:14:24,400
Hi.
329
00:14:24,440 --> 00:14:26,610
Oh, Mrs. Heffernan.
330
00:14:26,650 --> 00:14:29,450
I hope you and your husband
are enjoying your stay.
331
00:14:29,490 --> 00:14:33,280
Yes. We love your, um,
your apples.
332
00:14:38,960 --> 00:14:41,840
Uh, something
I can do for you?
333
00:14:41,880 --> 00:14:44,380
Uh, yes. Actually,
334
00:14:44,420 --> 00:14:46,760
it's kind of our
anniversary weekend.
335
00:14:46,800 --> 00:14:48,630
Oh, that's lovely.
336
00:14:48,680 --> 00:14:50,010
Thank you.
337
00:14:50,050 --> 00:14:55,640
Um, I was wondering if
there was a place around here...
338
00:14:55,680 --> 00:14:56,980
uh...
339
00:14:57,020 --> 00:15:01,690
you know, like a store
that might sell clothes...
340
00:15:01,730 --> 00:15:03,610
other items...
341
00:15:03,650 --> 00:15:07,400
funitems that, uh...
342
00:15:07,440 --> 00:15:09,950
might enhance or...
343
00:15:09,990 --> 00:15:12,990
spice up,
if you will...
344
00:15:14,740 --> 00:15:17,700
a young couple's
anniversary?
345
00:15:17,750 --> 00:15:19,370
Uh...
346
00:15:21,330 --> 00:15:24,250
There's a Sears
down on Route 40.
347
00:15:26,880 --> 00:15:28,590
Uh...
348
00:15:28,630 --> 00:15:30,590
no.
349
00:15:30,630 --> 00:15:32,260
Ahem.
350
00:15:32,300 --> 00:15:35,350
I meant more of
a specialty store.
351
00:15:35,390 --> 00:15:36,600
[CHUCKLES]
352
00:15:36,640 --> 00:15:38,390
Uh-huh.
353
00:15:38,430 --> 00:15:39,770
LL Bean?
354
00:15:42,020 --> 00:15:43,310
I'll go there,
thank you.
355
00:15:45,860 --> 00:15:48,320
[**]
356
00:16:20,890 --> 00:16:22,730
Oh, Mr. Heffernan...
357
00:16:22,770 --> 00:16:24,440
If you're looking for your wife,
she went up to your room
358
00:16:24,480 --> 00:16:25,770
about 10 minutes ago.
359
00:16:25,810 --> 00:16:27,070
Oh, thanks.
360
00:16:27,110 --> 00:16:29,480
And, uh, happy anniversary,
by the way.
361
00:16:29,530 --> 00:16:30,530
Thanks again.
362
00:16:30,570 --> 00:16:31,820
My wife and I,
363
00:16:31,860 --> 00:16:34,530
we're celebrating
our 42nd this month.
364
00:16:34,570 --> 00:16:37,330
Forty-two years, wow.
Congratulations.
365
00:16:37,370 --> 00:16:39,700
I tell ya,
I love her more every day.
366
00:16:39,740 --> 00:16:41,410
Really?
367
00:16:41,450 --> 00:16:43,750
Do you ever love her twice
in one day?
368
00:16:45,130 --> 00:16:46,460
Sorry.
369
00:16:56,930 --> 00:16:58,510
[CLEARS THROAT]
370
00:17:01,850 --> 00:17:03,350
Hi, Dougie.
371
00:17:04,850 --> 00:17:07,440
Wh-wh-what are you...
what are you wearing?
372
00:17:07,480 --> 00:17:09,440
Oh, this?
373
00:17:09,480 --> 00:17:11,820
Just a little
apple princess outfit
374
00:17:11,860 --> 00:17:13,990
I picked up in town.
375
00:17:14,030 --> 00:17:15,660
Why?
376
00:17:17,450 --> 00:17:19,660
To mix it up
a little bit.
377
00:17:19,700 --> 00:17:20,870
I saw you eyeing
that big cutout
378
00:17:20,910 --> 00:17:22,370
in the lobby, so...
379
00:17:22,410 --> 00:17:23,660
here you go.
380
00:17:23,710 --> 00:17:25,790
And hey, with me,
no paper cuts, hmm?
381
00:17:27,040 --> 00:17:30,090
Doesn't Doug likey?
382
00:17:30,130 --> 00:17:31,800
Oh, yeah!
Dougie likey, yeah.
383
00:17:31,840 --> 00:17:33,670
Okay, so come on.
384
00:17:33,720 --> 00:17:35,630
Let's make
some cider.
385
00:17:43,730 --> 00:17:45,140
What's the matter?
386
00:17:45,190 --> 00:17:46,810
Nothing. Just,
for a second there,
387
00:17:46,850 --> 00:17:48,400
you reminded me
of my mother.
388
00:17:49,860 --> 00:17:51,820
Wait! Ew!
389
00:17:51,860 --> 00:17:53,690
Your mother?
390
00:17:53,740 --> 00:17:55,860
You don't look like her.
391
00:17:55,900 --> 00:17:58,200
You look like the lady
on the box of cocoa
392
00:17:58,240 --> 00:18:00,200
my mother
used to make for me.
393
00:18:00,240 --> 00:18:01,160
And that's what
you were thinking
394
00:18:01,200 --> 00:18:02,490
when I was
kissing your neck?
395
00:18:02,540 --> 00:18:04,040
At first, yeah.
396
00:18:04,080 --> 00:18:06,120
Then I was thinking about
397
00:18:06,160 --> 00:18:09,710
how I used to like
2 packets in one mug.
398
00:18:09,750 --> 00:18:11,710
Make it extra cocoay.
399
00:18:11,750 --> 00:18:13,130
Okay. I'm guessing
the outfit's not working.
400
00:18:13,170 --> 00:18:15,170
No, no, no, it's fine!
Come on, stay!
401
00:18:15,220 --> 00:18:16,720
You look hot, apple wench!
Let's go!
402
00:18:16,760 --> 00:18:17,800
Okay.
403
00:18:17,840 --> 00:18:19,180
Come on.
404
00:18:24,100 --> 00:18:25,100
If you could just
lose the braids.
405
00:18:25,140 --> 00:18:27,230
Oh, forget it!
This is stupid!
406
00:18:27,270 --> 00:18:28,400
I'm sorry! I'm trying!
407
00:18:28,440 --> 00:18:30,480
We should've just
gone to Atlantic City.
408
00:18:30,520 --> 00:18:32,110
Then the sex stuff
never would've even come up.
409
00:18:33,610 --> 00:18:35,990
["LET'S GET IT ON" PLAYING]
Oh, God.
410
00:18:36,030 --> 00:18:39,990
*I've beenreally tryin', baby*
411
00:18:41,700 --> 00:18:44,740
Yeah, you're comin' on
the next vacation, right!
412
00:18:47,830 --> 00:18:50,080
*Like I feel, baby*
413
00:18:50,130 --> 00:18:51,580
*Come on*
414
00:18:51,630 --> 00:18:54,670
*Oh, come on...*
415
00:18:54,710 --> 00:18:55,920
Hey,
what's the matter?
416
00:18:55,960 --> 00:18:58,590
Um, nothing.
417
00:18:58,630 --> 00:19:00,590
I just thought, you know,
418
00:19:00,640 --> 00:19:03,010
why don't we go learn
how cider is made?
419
00:19:04,720 --> 00:19:06,520
You don't wanna
fool around?
420
00:19:06,560 --> 00:19:08,690
Uh...
421
00:19:08,730 --> 00:19:10,020
not right now.
422
00:19:10,060 --> 00:19:12,060
Why not?
423
00:19:12,110 --> 00:19:14,650
You gettin' tired
of your baby?
424
00:19:16,610 --> 00:19:17,570
Yes?
425
00:19:19,200 --> 00:19:20,990
Yes. The couple next door.
426
00:19:21,030 --> 00:19:22,530
Yeah. They're in room 21.
427
00:19:22,570 --> 00:19:25,580
Yeah. The music
is just way too loud.
428
00:19:25,620 --> 00:19:27,660
Doug, stop it!
429
00:19:30,170 --> 00:19:32,250
It's not their fault.
430
00:19:32,290 --> 00:19:33,840
Oh, then I guess
it must be my fault, huh?
431
00:19:33,880 --> 00:19:34,790
Captain Inadequate.
432
00:19:34,840 --> 00:19:36,300
What?
433
00:19:36,340 --> 00:19:38,590
I see the look in your face
when that music comes on.
434
00:19:38,630 --> 00:19:40,220
The longing,
the disappointment,
435
00:19:40,260 --> 00:19:42,800
the "Oh,
what might have been."
436
00:19:42,840 --> 00:19:44,970
What are you talking about?
437
00:19:45,010 --> 00:19:46,560
It's not you.
It's me.
438
00:19:46,600 --> 00:19:47,890
What?
439
00:19:47,930 --> 00:19:50,640
Yeah. I mean, obviously,
I don't turn you on anymore.
440
00:19:50,690 --> 00:19:52,650
[SCOFFS]
You don't turn me on?
441
00:19:52,690 --> 00:19:54,980
Well, yeah.
Not the way I used to.
442
00:19:55,020 --> 00:19:56,860
Have you ever seen
the look on my face
443
00:19:56,900 --> 00:19:58,320
when you get naked?
444
00:19:58,360 --> 00:20:01,610
It's like a kid
looking at Halloween candy.
445
00:20:01,650 --> 00:20:03,990
Or me
looking at Halloween candy.
446
00:20:05,780 --> 00:20:07,160
Really?
447
00:20:07,200 --> 00:20:08,750
Yeah. Believe me,
you're not the problem.
448
00:20:08,790 --> 00:20:10,210
The problem's right here,
the one-hit wonder.
449
00:20:11,790 --> 00:20:13,920
Would you stop it?
You're fine.
450
00:20:13,960 --> 00:20:14,960
I'm not fine, all right?
451
00:20:15,000 --> 00:20:16,210
I do it once,
and then I pass out
452
00:20:16,250 --> 00:20:17,750
like a grizzly bear
that got shot in the ass
453
00:20:17,800 --> 00:20:19,800
with, like, a sedative dart,
you know?
454
00:20:19,840 --> 00:20:21,720
"Oooohhhh!"
455
00:20:21,760 --> 00:20:24,050
"Oooohhhh!"
456
00:20:24,090 --> 00:20:26,550
And that is fine
with me.
457
00:20:26,600 --> 00:20:28,600
Look, after we make love,
I want to stop.
458
00:20:29,970 --> 00:20:33,140
Because I'm happy,
and I'm fulfilled.
459
00:20:33,190 --> 00:20:36,360
Plus, I like
to watch you sleep.
460
00:20:36,400 --> 00:20:39,190
You drool a little.
It's cute.
461
00:20:40,150 --> 00:20:43,910
If you're happy...
and I'm happy,
462
00:20:43,950 --> 00:20:45,910
then why are
we getting so crazy?
463
00:20:46,870 --> 00:20:48,990
I don't know.
464
00:20:49,040 --> 00:20:50,330
*Let's get it on*
465
00:20:50,370 --> 00:20:53,920
*Ooh*
466
00:20:53,960 --> 00:20:55,250
Deacon,
what is going on?
467
00:20:55,290 --> 00:20:56,250
Nothing's going on?
468
00:20:56,290 --> 00:20:57,340
Oh, something's going on.
469
00:20:57,380 --> 00:20:58,840
I just don't wanna
have sex with you.
470
00:20:58,880 --> 00:21:00,880
Why can't you
respect that?
471
00:21:02,840 --> 00:21:04,180
So you wanna open up
472
00:21:04,220 --> 00:21:06,890
some of that apple wine
in the minibar?
473
00:21:06,930 --> 00:21:10,060
Yeah. I'll get some ice.
It'll dull the taste.
474
00:21:10,100 --> 00:21:12,180
Okay. While you're
doing that,
475
00:21:12,230 --> 00:21:13,940
I will change out
of this stupid thing.
476
00:21:13,980 --> 00:21:16,060
Now, you did say naked
works for you, right?
477
00:21:16,100 --> 00:21:17,690
Oh, yeah.
Naked's a crowd-pleaser.
478
00:21:17,730 --> 00:21:18,770
OK.
479
00:21:20,280 --> 00:21:22,400
Kelly, c-come on!
480
00:21:22,440 --> 00:21:24,320
Don't be like that,
Kelly!
481
00:21:26,070 --> 00:21:27,820
Trouble in paradise?
482
00:21:34,000 --> 00:21:35,210
MALE NARRATOR:
After harvesting,
483
00:21:35,250 --> 00:21:38,170
the apples are sortedby size and color,
484
00:21:38,210 --> 00:21:40,050
then carefully packedfor their journey
485
00:21:40,090 --> 00:21:42,510
to dinner tablesacross the country.
486
00:21:42,550 --> 00:21:44,170
Mm-mmm!
487
00:21:44,220 --> 00:21:46,510
These beautiesshould keep the doctor away.
488
00:21:46,550 --> 00:21:49,300
Apples...
What are you watching?
489
00:21:49,350 --> 00:21:51,510
It's a tape. I bought it
in the hotel gift shop.
490
00:21:52,430 --> 00:21:53,890
Why?
491
00:21:53,930 --> 00:21:55,600
It was on sale.
492
00:21:55,640 --> 00:21:58,480
NARRATOR:Truly nature'smost versatile fruit.
493
00:21:58,520 --> 00:22:00,480
Well, Mr. and Mrs. America,
494
00:22:00,520 --> 00:22:02,440
how do you like them apples?
495
00:22:02,480 --> 00:22:04,570
Hey! That'smybit!
496
00:22:05,610 --> 00:22:08,910
[**]
34411
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