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When I look back on mySophomore year in high school,
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I was...well...
a uniquely tragic wreck.
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In subsequent time,
there have been some,
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friend and foe alike who have cometo question this claim.
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But I come armed with proof.
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At times like these I like to thinkabout the moments
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before I go on a roller coaster
and feel the need
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to emulate announcements one mighthear while waiting in line for such a ride.
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Because what you are about to witness
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is not for the weak-of-heart,
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the easily offended
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or those individuals who sufferfrom a fragile constitution.
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If you fall into any of these categories,I would urge you:
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leave now.
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Pregnant women are cautioned as well.
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00:00:58,024 --> 00:01:01,289
Anyway, that's me:right there, Chance Marquis.
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A name my dear departedmother thought
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00:01:03,530 --> 00:01:05,395
apropos for the gambleshe took on having me.
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00:01:06,133 --> 00:01:08,624
High school's a mess
for a lot of us, I realize.
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But in comparison to my mess,
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you might feel a twinge of guilt
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for ever thinking yours was
at all challenging.
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After all,
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everything's about perspective,
is it not?
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So, allow me to provide you
with some...
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...Oh but this isn't
where my story begins.
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It starts one year earlierwhen I entered
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Brickland International High Schoolas a transfer.
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My fourth new school in the last four yearsand my first time in Europe.
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Keep in mind, this was the '80s.
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Sometimes known asthe decade fashion forgot.
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Like leg warmers,
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always essential when getting readyfor first period Algebra.
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There was also a preponderance ofthin ties and mullet haircuts.
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In any case,
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even then I recognized allthis conformity as tragic.
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That one day we'd look backon the parachute pants
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and obsession over Smurfsand ask ourselves...
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00:02:03,924 --> 00:02:04,413
Why?
40
00:02:05,158 --> 00:02:06,750
But if the fashion was nightmare-ish
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00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:08,325
at least the music was good...
42
00:02:08,595 --> 00:02:10,897
which provided a fairly accurate soundtrack
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to the comic tragedythat was my life back then.
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I was assigned locker No. 13.
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I was assigned locker No. 13.
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It was a bad omen...and then this:
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Within minutes, it was evident,
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I was in hell...
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literally.
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We've got spirit, yes we do!
51
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We've got spirit and how 'bout you?!
52
00:04:03,176 --> 00:04:04,541
I think it's in my locker...
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00:04:04,978 --> 00:04:06,104
trying to get out, apparently.
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Faggot.
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00:04:20,126 --> 00:04:21,718
Oh really, no...
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00:04:21,995 --> 00:04:22,963
don't feel the need to announce your
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00:04:22,963 --> 00:04:24,828
your sexual-persuasion for my benefit.
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00:04:25,665 --> 00:04:26,791
Not me, man. You!
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00:04:27,500 --> 00:04:30,298
I can smell the stench all over you.
It stinks!
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00:04:31,338 --> 00:04:32,973
Which begs the question:
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00:04:32,973 --> 00:04:34,804
What were you just sniffing
to pick up the scent?
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00:04:35,342 --> 00:04:36,331
Their jock-straps?
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00:04:39,579 --> 00:04:40,170
Listen,
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00:04:40,580 --> 00:04:42,070
here's the rule, Mr. Peanut.
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00:04:42,649 --> 00:04:44,718
You do not speak to me unless
I give you permission.
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00:04:44,718 --> 00:04:45,616
You understand?
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I understand.
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00:04:47,721 --> 00:04:48,949
I'm just not going to comply.
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00:04:50,423 --> 00:04:52,857
I did not give you permission to speak,
homo-breath!
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00:04:53,460 --> 00:04:54,620
He is making me crabby.
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00:04:55,261 --> 00:04:58,321
And here I thought
that was your natural state... Aahhh!
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00:04:58,398 --> 00:05:00,059
Brad, what are you doing?
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00:05:00,500 --> 00:05:01,568
And who's he?
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00:05:01,568 --> 00:05:03,468
Dead meat in about 2 seconds.
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00:05:04,104 --> 00:05:04,763
Can you like,
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00:05:04,971 --> 00:05:07,963
pull yourself away from
your senseless terrorizing?
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00:05:08,341 --> 00:05:09,603
We need to talk.
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00:05:09,909 --> 00:05:11,877
Did you 'like' get permission?
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00:05:12,112 --> 00:05:13,213
You better shut-it man!
80
00:05:13,213 --> 00:05:15,215
Oh my god, is he, like, raging again?
81
00:05:15,215 --> 00:05:16,614
You shut it too, Rachel!
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00:05:17,650 --> 00:05:18,776
Brad, Brad...
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00:05:20,553 --> 00:05:21,315
Come on, let's go.
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00:05:22,389 --> 00:05:24,584
I'm telling you, Willy Wonka is history.
85
00:05:26,860 --> 00:05:27,884
Brad Harden...
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00:05:27,994 --> 00:05:28,983
and cronies.
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00:05:29,362 --> 00:05:30,351
I would ruminate more,
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00:05:30,630 --> 00:05:32,530
but we'll just let Brad read his own lines,
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00:05:33,333 --> 00:05:35,767
only in the more Neanderthal mannerbefitting his 'character'.
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00:05:44,611 --> 00:05:46,044
Are you Chance Marquis?
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00:05:47,180 --> 00:05:48,408
The one and only.
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00:05:48,581 --> 00:05:49,377
Great!
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00:05:49,516 --> 00:05:50,574
I'm Loretta Getzick,
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00:05:50,884 --> 00:05:52,986
Devil's Advocate Senior Sports Editor...
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00:05:52,986 --> 00:05:54,544
And you're on my team.
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00:05:55,188 --> 00:05:57,213
Um, you know I don't really do sports.
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00:05:57,991 --> 00:05:59,859
I know that most baseball uniforms
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00:05:59,859 --> 00:06:02,128
are inexplicably
made of a cotton-polyester blend,
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00:06:02,128 --> 00:06:03,618
but that's about the extent of it.
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00:06:03,797 --> 00:06:05,598
Ah, you'll learn then.
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00:06:05,598 --> 00:06:08,795
We have an open slot and Ms. Utterbach
assigned you.
102
00:06:09,502 --> 00:06:12,072
Well, is Ms. 'Ootle-blagh' unaware of my knack
of
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00:06:12,072 --> 00:06:14,267
covering the daily antics of Rosemary Clooney?
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00:06:14,674 --> 00:06:17,575
Or my witty commentaries
on student fashion tragedies?
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00:06:18,144 --> 00:06:19,479
It was all in my resume...
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00:06:19,479 --> 00:06:21,743
I really have no idea
what you're talking about,
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00:06:22,082 --> 00:06:23,310
nor do I care.
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00:06:23,950 --> 00:06:24,882
Joey,
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five hundred words on newest
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swim team member, Sara Bagshawe.
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00:06:29,289 --> 00:06:31,951
'Is that a Dolphin in our pool?'
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00:06:32,492 --> 00:06:35,695
Kimmie, in-depth interview with
Reichen Froman,
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00:06:35,695 --> 00:06:36,663
the team mascot.
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00:06:36,663 --> 00:06:39,257
Some art students made
a new devil head for the costume.
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00:06:39,833 --> 00:06:42,461
'Too Scary or Too Merry?'
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00:06:43,703 --> 00:06:48,470
And, a big Brickland Devil's Times
welcome to...Chance!
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Full-feature on the varsity football team.
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I know!
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00:06:52,679 --> 00:06:54,408
We're going to see what he's made of.
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00:06:54,948 --> 00:06:57,974
In-depth interviews with players,
coaches and fans.
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00:06:58,585 --> 00:07:00,678
'Is this the year we win it all?'
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All what?
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00:07:22,242 --> 00:07:24,574
Hank Hudson, Staff Photographer.
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00:07:25,078 --> 00:07:26,546
Loretta Go-Get-Em assigned me to
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00:07:26,546 --> 00:07:28,343
snap some shots
for your football piece.
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00:07:29,315 --> 00:07:30,714
Where do you want to start?
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Over.
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00:07:33,253 --> 00:07:35,588
Let me ask you this,
staff-photographer-Hank-Hudson:
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00:07:35,588 --> 00:07:37,783
do you have knowledge
of this football?
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00:07:38,124 --> 00:07:38,749
Football?
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00:07:38,858 --> 00:07:39,392
Footooboo...
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00:07:39,392 --> 00:07:41,519
Well, I know that
when they play it in America,
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they call it soccer,
134
00:07:43,830 --> 00:07:44,797
but it looks the same
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00:07:45,265 --> 00:07:47,062
and if you touch the ball with your hands,
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00:07:47,567 --> 00:07:48,625
they kick you out.
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00:07:48,768 --> 00:07:49,564
Forever.
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00:07:50,870 --> 00:07:52,895
Or do they make you a goalie...?
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00:07:57,277 --> 00:07:58,642
What's in your case?
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00:07:59,746 --> 00:08:00,678
What's in yours?
141
00:08:02,215 --> 00:08:03,341
I don't have one.
142
00:08:04,284 --> 00:08:05,273
One what?
143
00:08:06,052 --> 00:08:06,780
Freak.
144
00:08:07,153 --> 00:08:09,417
But curiously enough,I was warming up to him.
145
00:08:10,557 --> 00:08:12,548
Huh! Urgh!
146
00:08:23,236 --> 00:08:25,363
Take a picture, it'll last longer.
147
00:08:26,172 --> 00:08:28,504
If that was her way of makinga witty first- impression,
148
00:08:28,908 --> 00:08:31,311
then my guess was that thepulled-too-tight pony tail
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00:08:31,311 --> 00:08:33,779
was cutting-off blood flow
to her brain.
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00:08:38,351 --> 00:08:39,682
I don't 'do' tennis.
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00:08:40,320 --> 00:08:42,311
Forty-love and deuce and shit...
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no wonder the British lost,
153
00:08:44,724 --> 00:08:46,492
can't even figure out
how to score stuff.
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00:08:46,492 --> 00:08:48,428
The origin of scoring
is French actually,
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bastardized into English.
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Deuce for instance,
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being a corruption of 'deux',
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meaning two consecutive exchanges
needed to win.
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00:08:54,968 --> 00:08:57,994
Now 'love' is either a vulgarisation
of the word 'l'oeuf'...
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00:08:58,137 --> 00:09:00,605
Please, your dorkiness
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was already established with
the top-hat and cane.
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Look,
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Heretic can't see over
to this backstop.
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Which means
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I don't have to hit a stupid ball
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against a wall for 45 minutes.
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So fascinating!
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Heretic?
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Coach Hera.
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00:09:19,425 --> 00:09:21,552
The troglodyte
from sex-reassignment hell.
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Really?
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She was a he?
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00:09:24,764 --> 00:09:25,924
In actuality,
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who the hell knows?
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in my made-up reality,
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yes!
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I'm Chance.
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Your reality just might fascinate me.
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Twyla.
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00:09:36,075 --> 00:09:37,702
And your pasty-white legs
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definitely repulse me.
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00:09:40,580 --> 00:09:42,844
If the shorts weren't so dark,
the contrast would be lessened.
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00:09:42,982 --> 00:09:46,110
Ergo, my legs would not appear
so falsely pale.
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00:09:47,287 --> 00:09:49,312
You don't have many friends,
do you Chance?
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I just moved here.
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00:09:52,325 --> 00:09:53,815
So far, I hate it.
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Not likely to change.
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00:10:02,135 --> 00:10:04,626
Chance Marquis,
please report to Administration.
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00:10:05,338 --> 00:10:06,066
Now.
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00:10:06,339 --> 00:10:07,499
Admin's that way...
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00:10:12,445 --> 00:10:14,413
Chance Marquis...
192
00:10:14,614 --> 00:10:16,775
Vice Principal Ophelia Smelker.
193
00:10:16,916 --> 00:10:19,407
As disturbing in-person as sheappears in her photos,
194
00:10:19,619 --> 00:10:23,020
and quite possibly the most odorous humanI've ever encountered...
195
00:10:23,423 --> 00:10:24,754
and not in a pleasing way.
196
00:10:25,024 --> 00:10:26,355
Remove the hat, please.
197
00:10:27,460 --> 00:10:30,258
Looking over your file here...
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00:10:31,597 --> 00:10:33,622
Transfer records, report cards,
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personal items.
200
00:10:35,935 --> 00:10:38,927
Why aren't you enrolled
in our mixed choir?
201
00:10:39,906 --> 00:10:41,464
Uh, polyps.
202
00:10:41,674 --> 00:10:42,766
I beg your pardon.
203
00:10:43,643 --> 00:10:45,668
Polyps. On my vocal cords.
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00:10:45,912 --> 00:10:47,436
I can't sing until they heal.
205
00:10:47,847 --> 00:10:49,610
What about surgery?
206
00:10:49,949 --> 00:10:51,075
It's against our religion.
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00:10:51,751 --> 00:10:53,048
Which is...?
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00:10:54,253 --> 00:10:55,550
Not to be discussed.
209
00:11:00,193 --> 00:11:04,664
Your permanent records show,
among other things,
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00:11:04,664 --> 00:11:06,966
instances of misbehavior,
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00:11:06,966 --> 00:11:10,002
insubordination and episodes of...
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00:11:10,002 --> 00:11:13,130
channelling deceased torch singers,
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00:11:13,473 --> 00:11:18,706
such as: Rosemary Clooney, Dionne Warwick
and Ethel Merman.
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00:11:19,112 --> 00:11:21,546
Care to explain that one?
215
00:11:21,647 --> 00:11:23,911
I'd rather not, it's personal.
216
00:11:24,050 --> 00:11:24,982
And quite frankly,
217
00:11:25,118 --> 00:11:27,609
I don't remember because
I'm not 'au courant' when it happens.
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00:11:32,825 --> 00:11:34,952
There's one thing you will have to explain:
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00:11:35,128 --> 00:11:36,095
your locker.
220
00:11:36,662 --> 00:11:40,325
Destruction of school property
is a severe offense.
221
00:11:41,134 --> 00:11:42,066
As it should be.
222
00:11:42,635 --> 00:11:44,398
But my question to you would be this:
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00:11:44,604 --> 00:11:46,739
what branch of logic do you cleave to
224
00:11:46,739 --> 00:11:49,173
that would explain why I
would destroy my own locker?
225
00:11:54,380 --> 00:11:57,577
The first day of school
is often filled with rage...
226
00:11:57,717 --> 00:12:00,481
especially for transfer students.
227
00:12:04,490 --> 00:12:09,257
V-P Smelker runs a tight ship here
at Brickland High.
228
00:12:10,463 --> 00:12:13,523
Her tolerance is low for wiseacres.
229
00:12:13,666 --> 00:12:16,396
And even lower for weirdoes.
230
00:12:16,803 --> 00:12:17,929
CAPEESH?!
231
00:12:19,038 --> 00:12:23,099
I was unaware that overweight women from theEastern block used words like 'capeesh'.
232
00:12:36,923 --> 00:12:39,118
Then Mrs. Zito split us into groups.
233
00:12:39,392 --> 00:12:41,656
I'm in the 'Alligators' for math and science.
234
00:12:41,994 --> 00:12:43,586
And where do the Alligators rank?
235
00:12:43,996 --> 00:12:46,897
Starts with an 'A', Sir. Duh! Tippy-top.
236
00:12:47,166 --> 00:12:48,724
Outstanding. Excellent!
237
00:12:50,303 --> 00:12:51,600
What's that doing on the table?
238
00:12:53,206 --> 00:12:54,833
Chance wore it to school today.
239
00:12:56,008 --> 00:12:58,067
What next, a dress?
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00:12:58,511 --> 00:12:59,535
My dad.
241
00:12:59,812 --> 00:13:02,474
A man who never met a rulehe didn't try out at least once...
242
00:13:03,149 --> 00:13:04,173
or a firearm.
243
00:13:04,717 --> 00:13:07,117
What kind of reaction do you get when
you show up with something like that on?
244
00:13:07,954 --> 00:13:08,886
It varies.
245
00:13:09,522 --> 00:13:12,082
The people behind me get upset because
they can't see the blackboard...
246
00:13:12,592 --> 00:13:13,354
Due to the hat.
247
00:13:14,494 --> 00:13:16,018
Mostly, they just miss the point.
248
00:13:16,295 --> 00:13:17,523
Which is what, exactly?
249
00:13:17,897 --> 00:13:21,000
That my chosen expression of
individualism should be embraced,
250
00:13:21,000 --> 00:13:21,967
not ridiculed.
251
00:13:23,002 --> 00:13:24,697
Someone hit him in the head
with a tennis ball.
252
00:13:26,005 --> 00:13:28,040
Then he got sent
to the Vice Principal
253
00:13:28,040 --> 00:13:30,099
after a bully called him
a homosexual.
254
00:13:30,610 --> 00:13:31,372
Sienna,
255
00:13:31,544 --> 00:13:33,739
my real sister with the fake accent.
256
00:13:34,046 --> 00:13:37,038
I tell her everything and, quite often,live to regret it.
257
00:13:38,117 --> 00:13:40,415
Why did they send you
to the principal's office for that?
258
00:13:41,354 --> 00:13:42,150
Long story.
259
00:13:42,922 --> 00:13:44,514
She already has it out for me though.
260
00:13:44,891 --> 00:13:47,126
She's also one of the largest women
I've ever seen...
261
00:13:47,126 --> 00:13:48,525
like circus-large.
262
00:13:49,028 --> 00:13:50,463
I'm sure if she were to grow a beard,
263
00:13:50,463 --> 00:13:52,398
which I'm quite certain she's capable of-
264
00:13:52,398 --> 00:13:53,296
Chance,
265
00:13:54,200 --> 00:13:55,098
understood.
266
00:13:58,371 --> 00:14:00,202
Sounds like
you had a rough day, Cadet.
267
00:14:01,240 --> 00:14:02,675
But I think you forgot
rule number one,
268
00:14:02,675 --> 00:14:04,443
which is: when kids call you names,
269
00:14:04,443 --> 00:14:05,511
you stand up for yourself
270
00:14:05,511 --> 00:14:06,569
like a man.
271
00:14:08,281 --> 00:14:09,646
I think he needs more R-T-T.
272
00:14:11,017 --> 00:14:12,785
Retrograde Tactical Training?
273
00:14:12,785 --> 00:14:13,717
Roger that.
274
00:14:14,687 --> 00:14:16,416
What did you enjoy most about that?
275
00:14:17,990 --> 00:14:18,854
Jujitsu.
276
00:14:19,058 --> 00:14:19,524
Aye!
277
00:14:20,393 --> 00:14:21,724
When I was nine.
278
00:14:23,596 --> 00:14:24,961
'Kids' aren't calling me names.
279
00:14:25,364 --> 00:14:26,558
One of them, Brad Harden,
280
00:14:26,699 --> 00:14:27,666
called me 'homo-breath,'
281
00:14:27,967 --> 00:14:29,195
but he started off with 'faggot'.
282
00:14:29,669 --> 00:14:30,567
Chance,
283
00:14:31,604 --> 00:14:33,697
you know I don't like to hear
that word in this house.
284
00:14:35,975 --> 00:14:37,670
As opposed to just living with one?
285
00:14:55,728 --> 00:14:56,786
Getting settled in?
286
00:15:01,067 --> 00:15:02,125
Listen Chance,
287
00:15:03,269 --> 00:15:05,567
a unit is only as strong
as its weakest link.
288
00:15:07,039 --> 00:15:08,631
It's my job to shore up the links.
289
00:15:13,179 --> 00:15:14,237
Do you understand?
290
00:15:16,382 --> 00:15:17,076
Chance,
291
00:15:19,118 --> 00:15:19,982
understood?
292
00:15:24,323 --> 00:15:25,119
Lights out soon.
293
00:15:30,896 --> 00:15:33,057
I said come back here right now.
294
00:15:33,633 --> 00:15:36,193
Don't walk away from me,
we're not done discussing this!
295
00:15:36,435 --> 00:15:37,903
Well, I'm done discussing it!
296
00:15:37,903 --> 00:15:41,464
Did you ever think that playing football
is not the answer to everything?
297
00:15:41,907 --> 00:15:44,637
Then explain to me how you're
gonna pay for your tuition!
298
00:15:46,245 --> 00:15:47,803
How are you gonna pay
for your studies?!
299
00:15:48,648 --> 00:15:50,416
You think its me
who's gonna pay for that!
300
00:15:50,416 --> 00:15:52,151
I don't care,
I'll figure something out!
301
00:15:52,151 --> 00:15:54,120
Don't blow this
football scholarship, Lee.
302
00:15:54,120 --> 00:15:56,486
Start figuring that out and soon!!
303
00:16:58,551 --> 00:17:03,181
Sometimes life has a strange way of givingyou EXACTLY what you want.
304
00:17:12,531 --> 00:17:13,966
And then making you pay,
305
00:17:13,966 --> 00:17:15,297
dearly.
306
00:17:36,021 --> 00:17:38,888
So, does your dad keep like,
guns and artillery at home?
307
00:17:39,358 --> 00:17:40,620
Uh, affirmative.
308
00:17:41,193 --> 00:17:43,496
The hand-grenades are stored
in the dining buffet
309
00:17:43,496 --> 00:17:45,088
and he only loads the semi-automatics,
310
00:17:45,564 --> 00:17:47,156
but we feel very safe.
311
00:17:48,834 --> 00:17:50,669
Are you trying to piss me off on purpose?
312
00:17:50,669 --> 00:17:52,000
Because sittin' here
313
00:17:52,204 --> 00:17:54,940
with you two losers is doing
nothing for my reputation.
314
00:17:54,940 --> 00:17:57,340
And, for the record...you are poison.
315
00:17:57,810 --> 00:17:59,607
And you're... plain toxic.
316
00:18:00,746 --> 00:18:04,273
Well, your reputation, from what
I observe, is pretty much non-existent.
317
00:18:04,583 --> 00:18:06,886
So at least being seen with us,
you have fumes of relevance.
318
00:18:06,886 --> 00:18:08,148
It's a step up in my book.
319
00:18:12,525 --> 00:18:13,787
Do you smell that?
320
00:18:15,394 --> 00:18:16,554
Students...
321
00:18:17,763 --> 00:18:19,492
On the bench Miss Tiller.
322
00:18:19,799 --> 00:18:21,699
Tables are not chairs.
323
00:18:27,740 --> 00:18:29,332
Mr. Hudson,
324
00:18:30,142 --> 00:18:32,007
open your briefcase please.
325
00:18:33,212 --> 00:18:33,906
Why?
326
00:18:34,446 --> 00:18:35,981
A general inspection.
327
00:18:35,981 --> 00:18:37,778
This is private property.
328
00:18:39,018 --> 00:18:41,009
That's illegal search and seizure.
329
00:18:41,353 --> 00:18:42,547
Not on this campus.
330
00:18:43,088 --> 00:18:45,682
This school is beholden
to a different law:
331
00:18:46,192 --> 00:18:48,592
'V-P Smelker's Law.'
332
00:18:49,395 --> 00:18:50,987
OPEN IT!
333
00:19:00,573 --> 00:19:01,801
What happened to your eye?
334
00:19:02,641 --> 00:19:03,843
Nothing,
335
00:19:03,843 --> 00:19:05,003
why do you inquire?
336
00:19:13,919 --> 00:19:15,079
Could you move those?
337
00:19:20,860 --> 00:19:23,522
Ahh, I missed
the first two days of class...
338
00:19:24,563 --> 00:19:26,827
Ms. Hughes said you
were the only solo left.
339
00:19:27,833 --> 00:19:29,698
Guess that makes us lab partners.
340
00:19:30,336 --> 00:19:33,572
Well, I pride myself on being the last
chosen, not only in sports,
341
00:19:33,572 --> 00:19:35,631
but in combustible experiments as well.
342
00:19:38,911 --> 00:19:39,775
I'm Levi.
343
00:19:40,246 --> 00:19:41,213
Uh, Chance Marquis.
344
00:19:41,447 --> 00:19:43,711
Chance. C-H-A-N-C-E. Chance.
345
00:19:51,857 --> 00:19:53,484
I think we're neighbors...
346
00:19:57,029 --> 00:20:00,032
I don't suppose you'd believe
I have an identical twin brother
347
00:20:00,032 --> 00:20:01,556
who looks exactly like me...
348
00:20:06,839 --> 00:20:09,364
I can show you how to rig your
cable box for the porn channels.
349
00:20:12,544 --> 00:20:15,012
Hey, forget about it -
I already have. Okay?
350
00:20:18,083 --> 00:20:20,847
I wish my ex-girlfriend looked at me
like that a couple of times, though.
351
00:20:24,023 --> 00:20:25,115
What happened to your eye?
352
00:20:26,392 --> 00:20:27,192
Nothing.
353
00:20:27,192 --> 00:20:27,954
Why?
354
00:20:42,207 --> 00:20:43,333
Hey, Cinderfella,
355
00:20:43,842 --> 00:20:45,707
the women's locker room
is on the other side.
356
00:20:48,314 --> 00:20:51,442
Oh! Um...
Listen up sporty-type-fellas.
357
00:20:51,784 --> 00:20:53,385
Look, I'm doing a piece on the team
358
00:20:53,385 --> 00:20:54,820
for the paper and was really, really
359
00:20:54,820 --> 00:20:56,048
hoping for some interviews?
360
00:20:56,889 --> 00:20:58,686
You breakin' my no-talk rule again?
361
00:20:59,892 --> 00:21:01,519
Why do you have to defy me? Huh?!
362
00:21:02,027 --> 00:21:03,162
Call me a masochist.
363
00:21:03,162 --> 00:21:04,527
I'll call you a douche-bag,
364
00:21:05,698 --> 00:21:06,790
'cuz that's what you are.
365
00:21:09,268 --> 00:21:09,927
Listen up!
366
00:21:10,469 --> 00:21:12,767
As the team captain,
I'm giving a direct order here...
367
00:21:13,372 --> 00:21:15,774
Nobody talks to the douche-bag
about our team.
368
00:21:15,774 --> 00:21:16,365
You got it?
369
00:21:16,775 --> 00:21:17,867
Not one word, okay?
370
00:21:18,210 --> 00:21:18,869
How come?
371
00:21:19,445 --> 00:21:21,970
Well, you see Gus man...
that's why I'm here.
372
00:21:23,015 --> 00:21:24,448
To think when your brain pauses.
373
00:21:25,951 --> 00:21:27,714
You don't want homosexuals
in your head.
374
00:21:27,886 --> 00:21:30,480
Give 'em a crack and
375
00:21:30,656 --> 00:21:32,324
you're listenin' to 'Sister Christian'
376
00:21:32,324 --> 00:21:34,918
and jerking off
to pictures of Patrick Swayze!
377
00:21:35,294 --> 00:21:36,522
Night Ranger's gay?
378
00:21:36,895 --> 00:21:38,988
Well, who knows man,
but that fuckin' song is!
379
00:21:39,732 --> 00:21:41,367
Patrick Swayze pictures?
380
00:21:41,367 --> 00:21:43,130
Or Rick Springfield,
you know whoever!
381
00:21:44,036 --> 00:21:46,334
Look, the point is...
382
00:21:47,006 --> 00:21:48,769
he'll just write some girlie article
383
00:21:49,441 --> 00:21:50,931
that'll make us look like girls!
384
00:21:55,614 --> 00:21:56,672
I'm sorry fruit-fly,
385
00:21:58,751 --> 00:22:00,150
but that's the way the fudge is packed.
386
00:22:11,864 --> 00:22:13,991
Why do you let him call you those names?
387
00:22:15,167 --> 00:22:20,366
Well, where I show anger and agitation over
his derogatory comments regarding what I am,
388
00:22:20,773 --> 00:22:22,138
I bequeath him power, no?
389
00:22:23,776 --> 00:22:27,906
And I've deduced that since Brad's intelligence
hovers only slightly above that of burnt toast,
390
00:22:28,914 --> 00:22:30,643
why give him that kind of control over me?
391
00:23:10,289 --> 00:23:12,757
The 'Split Infinitives' ladies and gentlemen.
392
00:23:13,892 --> 00:23:14,916
Not bad, huh?
393
00:23:15,027 --> 00:23:16,392
A back-beat would help.
394
00:23:17,096 --> 00:23:18,256
Drummer's taking a leak.
395
00:23:19,731 --> 00:23:20,459
What do you think?
396
00:23:21,200 --> 00:23:23,402
Ah, I... I think,
397
00:23:23,402 --> 00:23:25,131
Foreigner songs
are better left to... Foreigner?
398
00:23:25,404 --> 00:23:26,735
That wasn't Foreigner.
399
00:23:27,106 --> 00:23:28,767
Do you ever cover the Carpenters?
400
00:23:29,074 --> 00:23:30,735
Karen has a lovely voice.
401
00:23:37,716 --> 00:23:39,411
Hey! What's the faggot doing here?
402
00:23:43,288 --> 00:23:44,721
Your band is dreadful.
403
00:23:44,990 --> 00:23:47,481
But they're actually
a lot better without you!
404
00:23:50,796 --> 00:23:51,660
A real cute kid.
405
00:24:04,776 --> 00:24:06,004
Take a chill-pill,
406
00:24:06,578 --> 00:24:09,741
you'll totally smell her before
she gets within 50 yards.
407
00:24:09,948 --> 00:24:11,381
A hundred if we're downwind.
408
00:24:12,050 --> 00:24:13,881
She's in my nightmares.
409
00:24:14,386 --> 00:24:17,082
She IS my nightmares...
410
00:24:18,357 --> 00:24:21,383
Hey, you guys wanna go into
the city this weekend?
411
00:24:21,593 --> 00:24:23,220
I have this day-long photo project,
412
00:24:23,495 --> 00:24:24,363
what I have to do, see,
413
00:24:24,363 --> 00:24:26,932
is take a picture
every hour of the same thing and-
414
00:24:26,932 --> 00:24:28,901
Okay. We'll go.
415
00:24:28,901 --> 00:24:30,266
And for future reference,
416
00:24:30,469 --> 00:24:33,199
we don't care that much about
your photo projects.
417
00:24:33,472 --> 00:24:34,666
So fascinating!
418
00:24:55,494 --> 00:24:56,518
Can I just ask:
419
00:24:56,728 --> 00:24:59,663
what's proper protocol should this
vehicle spontaneously combust?
420
00:25:00,132 --> 00:25:02,334
Look Prince Weird-Clothes,
421
00:25:02,334 --> 00:25:05,792
if his highness would rather walk,
I can pull over right now.
422
00:25:06,104 --> 00:25:07,230
Zip it...
423
00:25:49,248 --> 00:25:50,510
Finally.
424
00:25:50,616 --> 00:25:52,413
Can we do something interesting now?
425
00:25:53,518 --> 00:25:54,507
I thought we were.
426
00:25:54,987 --> 00:25:56,682
Do we look interested?
427
00:25:57,789 --> 00:25:59,091
It's sort of hard to tell,
428
00:25:59,091 --> 00:26:02,060
cuz the two of you never look
interested in anything.
429
00:26:05,664 --> 00:26:06,858
I have an idea...
430
00:26:07,332 --> 00:26:10,130
I'm just not sure if two of you
are man enough...
431
00:26:11,069 --> 00:26:11,967
Are you?
432
00:26:13,338 --> 00:26:14,906
Agreed. Stupid question.
433
00:26:14,906 --> 00:26:16,601
Of course you are, Sir.
434
00:26:18,210 --> 00:26:19,302
C'mon girls.
435
00:26:20,112 --> 00:26:22,342
This looks like a nice
upscale neighborhood.
436
00:26:23,215 --> 00:26:24,549
Look out for the curve...
437
00:26:24,549 --> 00:26:26,107
Relax... I'm parking.
438
00:26:38,797 --> 00:26:40,594
Those things will kill you.
439
00:26:41,066 --> 00:26:43,125
They're much like dark alleys that way.
440
00:26:45,337 --> 00:26:47,669
Club Red and Blue.
441
00:26:47,939 --> 00:26:49,341
Twenty-one and over.
442
00:26:49,341 --> 00:26:50,968
So we're going in the side entrance.
443
00:26:51,576 --> 00:26:52,338
With what?
444
00:26:52,477 --> 00:26:54,672
A battering ram and fake police badges?
445
00:26:56,381 --> 00:26:57,814
C'mon, just follow me.
446
00:26:59,318 --> 00:27:00,342
What kind of club is this?
447
00:27:00,652 --> 00:27:01,676
You'll see.
448
00:27:08,327 --> 00:27:09,191
Hey Sasha.
449
00:27:09,494 --> 00:27:11,359
Hi Twyla, how are you?
450
00:27:11,830 --> 00:27:12,631
I'm sixteen,
451
00:27:12,631 --> 00:27:15,031
in high school
and I got two losers in-tow.
452
00:27:15,500 --> 00:27:19,104
Life just continues
to suck big ostrich eggs.
453
00:27:19,104 --> 00:27:20,128
Yeah, yeah, yeah...
454
00:29:28,934 --> 00:29:30,299
You lost, sweetie?
455
00:29:30,869 --> 00:29:32,234
Help me with the dress, will you.
456
00:29:51,156 --> 00:29:52,521
So schoolboy,
457
00:29:52,657 --> 00:29:53,954
how do they call you?
458
00:29:54,226 --> 00:29:55,318
Chance Marquis.
459
00:29:56,061 --> 00:29:57,153
Claire Vuoyant.
460
00:29:57,996 --> 00:29:59,486
What a fabulous name.
461
00:29:59,931 --> 00:30:02,161
Give my regards
to the angel who named you.
462
00:30:02,834 --> 00:30:04,802
That would be my dear-departed mother.
463
00:30:05,070 --> 00:30:05,968
May she rest in peace.
464
00:30:07,839 --> 00:30:08,737
Claire Vuoyant,
465
00:30:09,140 --> 00:30:09,834
I like it.
466
00:30:10,342 --> 00:30:11,673
I can see queerly now!
467
00:30:13,845 --> 00:30:15,608
So, how old are you?
468
00:30:16,414 --> 00:30:17,608
Uh...twenty-two.
469
00:30:17,849 --> 00:30:20,545
Yeah, right. Six years from now, baby.
470
00:30:20,886 --> 00:30:23,116
Hum ! You don't bullshit a drag,
471
00:30:23,455 --> 00:30:25,855
especially when she's known for her
precognitive powers.
472
00:30:26,057 --> 00:30:28,992
It only leads to a heartache
and a sore rear.
473
00:30:29,561 --> 00:30:32,325
I think we're scaring
Oliver Twist over here, ladies!
474
00:30:32,764 --> 00:30:33,890
I'm not scared.
475
00:30:38,803 --> 00:30:42,107
Good, because with a little glitter
and a fabulous dress
476
00:30:42,107 --> 00:30:43,631
get your britches in a twist,
477
00:30:43,775 --> 00:30:46,369
you'll positively faint
when Lily Pad over there,
478
00:30:46,545 --> 00:30:47,910
takes her thong off.
479
00:30:50,282 --> 00:30:51,476
You were great out there tonight.
480
00:30:51,616 --> 00:30:53,243
Thank you, Rex Reed.
481
00:30:55,220 --> 00:30:56,881
Oh, don't mention the hair?
482
00:30:57,022 --> 00:30:59,752
The dress?
The dress was a star tonight!
483
00:31:00,492 --> 00:31:02,824
The whole package was astounding.
484
00:31:03,128 --> 00:31:06,188
Well, if done correctly,
the package was invisible.
485
00:31:08,700 --> 00:31:09,564
Where's Chance?
486
00:31:09,834 --> 00:31:10,994
He was right behind me.
487
00:31:11,136 --> 00:31:12,501
Go find him!
488
00:31:13,204 --> 00:31:14,330
What're you going to do?
489
00:31:14,873 --> 00:31:16,602
Wait. Have a cigarette.
490
00:31:17,042 --> 00:31:19,306
Ponder why dweebs are drawn to me.
491
00:31:22,647 --> 00:31:24,581
Well, you don't learn it, per se.
492
00:31:25,216 --> 00:31:27,684
It's more like...
it just pops out one day.
493
00:31:28,019 --> 00:31:29,418
Then you refine.
494
00:31:29,788 --> 00:31:32,052
Find the right dress, the right song,
495
00:31:32,357 --> 00:31:35,485
right name, and then you practice
till your feet bleed.
496
00:31:36,261 --> 00:31:36,818
Bitch,
497
00:31:37,162 --> 00:31:39,130
your feet wouldn't bleed if you'd admit
498
00:31:39,130 --> 00:31:43,692
to their actual big-ass largeness
and stop wearing size-sixes.
499
00:31:44,703 --> 00:31:48,469
Lily, until you stop menstruating,
talk to the hand!
500
00:31:49,708 --> 00:31:51,743
You're all so sassy and sarcastic,
501
00:31:51,743 --> 00:31:53,973
but no one retaliates
in a truly harmful way.
502
00:31:56,448 --> 00:31:57,938
I saw that bitch!
503
00:31:58,316 --> 00:32:01,308
Don't make me replace your
crack with baking soda!
504
00:32:04,589 --> 00:32:05,487
Chance?
505
00:32:08,226 --> 00:32:08,988
Here,
506
00:32:09,995 --> 00:32:11,292
you should try it some time.
507
00:32:11,529 --> 00:32:12,826
I think you'd be a natural.
508
00:32:17,602 --> 00:32:19,069
Just remember, Chance,
509
00:32:19,738 --> 00:32:21,000
this is an illusion.
510
00:32:21,139 --> 00:32:23,300
You have to make everyone believe.
511
00:32:24,609 --> 00:32:26,042
Starting with yourself.
512
00:32:50,969 --> 00:32:54,439
No-no, if you wait to jump
a half-second longer,
513
00:32:54,439 --> 00:32:56,771
the frog can make it across
in a straight shot, but--
514
00:32:56,841 --> 00:32:58,103
Hey, Tinkerbell!
515
00:33:00,445 --> 00:33:01,912
So how's the story going, man?
516
00:33:02,213 --> 00:33:02,941
You want a quote?
517
00:33:05,016 --> 00:33:05,778
Yup.
518
00:33:06,751 --> 00:33:08,378
Someday soon,
519
00:33:09,287 --> 00:33:10,777
when you least expect it,
520
00:33:11,389 --> 00:33:14,222
I am gonna totally kick
your fairy-ass.
521
00:33:15,794 --> 00:33:17,159
Brad, can we go?
522
00:33:17,762 --> 00:33:18,963
Just screwin' with him baby,
523
00:33:18,963 --> 00:33:20,123
just screwin' with him.
524
00:33:24,102 --> 00:33:25,262
Hmmm.... peanuts,
don't mind if I do.
525
00:33:29,974 --> 00:33:32,704
You familiar with the concept of REVENGE?
526
00:33:32,877 --> 00:33:36,813
Yeah, ever since Judy Hatteberg
appropriated my chalk in kindergarten.
527
00:33:37,882 --> 00:33:39,008
She paid.
528
00:33:40,485 --> 00:33:43,054
You're a shark, and Brad's the remora,
529
00:33:43,054 --> 00:33:46,387
suctioned to you tighter than spandex
on David Lee Roth.
530
00:33:47,092 --> 00:33:49,993
So, there's only one thing to do:
531
00:33:50,161 --> 00:33:51,696
grab it by its tail,
532
00:33:51,696 --> 00:33:54,096
rip it from your flesh
and then SMASH IT!
533
00:33:58,570 --> 00:34:02,336
High school is like Darwinism in a test tube:
survival of the fittest.
534
00:34:02,707 --> 00:34:06,268
Only here, because Brad outweighs
you by fifty pounds,
535
00:34:06,911 --> 00:34:09,209
fit equals smart.
536
00:34:12,550 --> 00:34:13,847
Hey Chance,
537
00:34:15,253 --> 00:34:18,120
you still need someone to interview
for your story?
538
00:34:18,556 --> 00:34:19,284
Why?
539
00:34:19,591 --> 00:34:20,992
Did you take pity on me and convince your
540
00:34:20,992 --> 00:34:23,859
best friend and favorite drummer,
Brad Harden, to sit for an interview?
541
00:34:23,995 --> 00:34:25,326
Brad hates you.
542
00:34:26,030 --> 00:34:28,658
Besides, the only thing
that convinces Brad of anything
543
00:34:29,167 --> 00:34:29,929
is Brad.
544
00:34:30,535 --> 00:34:31,433
Or Toni.
545
00:34:32,103 --> 00:34:34,503
But even then, it's only when
she's denying him sex.
546
00:34:36,808 --> 00:34:40,642
Anyway, I was thinkin' you
could interview me.
547
00:34:42,213 --> 00:34:45,410
Well, I hate to point out the fact that
you might be as dense as a redwood, Levi,
548
00:34:45,550 --> 00:34:47,819
but I need to interview someone who
actually plays on the team.
549
00:34:47,819 --> 00:34:49,548
Ergo, not you.
550
00:34:49,654 --> 00:34:51,144
I appreciate the insult.
551
00:34:51,556 --> 00:34:52,420
What insult?
552
00:34:52,690 --> 00:34:54,859
I'm a first-string forward.
553
00:34:54,859 --> 00:34:56,861
I haven't been practicing
because of a knee injury,
554
00:34:56,861 --> 00:34:58,988
but it should be okay by
the season opener.
555
00:34:59,130 --> 00:34:59,831
Wait, wait... What?
556
00:34:59,831 --> 00:35:01,696
You're getting around
to telling me this, now?
557
00:35:02,233 --> 00:35:04,701
I thought you'd appreciate the,
you know...
558
00:35:05,170 --> 00:35:06,535
dramatic pause.
559
00:35:08,006 --> 00:35:08,734
Why?
560
00:35:09,207 --> 00:35:12,040
Aren't your people all into
drama and stuff?
561
00:35:12,844 --> 00:35:16,541
You're so correct, right up there with
gingham and party-planning.
562
00:35:16,781 --> 00:35:20,080
My 'people' are also into
the fashionably ironic,
563
00:35:20,585 --> 00:35:22,576
but I'll make an exception in your case.
564
00:35:27,292 --> 00:35:29,760
Hey! I can be ironic!
565
00:35:34,632 --> 00:35:36,623
Dang, is this inside out?
566
00:35:40,371 --> 00:35:41,668
What's your favorite kind of music?
567
00:35:42,507 --> 00:35:43,439
I like lots of music.
568
00:35:45,176 --> 00:35:47,644
Correction. I love music.
569
00:35:51,015 --> 00:35:52,642
When is your band playing next?
570
00:35:57,555 --> 00:35:59,921
'Seventh Annual
Battle-of-the-High-School-Bands'
571
00:36:01,059 --> 00:36:03,528
The winner gets one-free-week studio time,
572
00:36:03,528 --> 00:36:07,294
and a guaranteed listen of their music by
some big London music producer.
573
00:36:07,632 --> 00:36:08,929
Pretty sweet, huh?
574
00:36:09,734 --> 00:36:11,361
I think we have a real shot.
575
00:36:12,537 --> 00:36:14,164
Who, 'we'?
576
00:36:15,106 --> 00:36:16,198
The Split-Infinitives!
577
00:36:16,407 --> 00:36:17,999
We're gonna rock the shit.
578
00:36:20,078 --> 00:36:21,568
Can I be honest with you, Chance?
579
00:36:22,113 --> 00:36:24,445
Music is my life.
580
00:36:24,883 --> 00:36:25,815
It's everything.
581
00:36:26,417 --> 00:36:28,248
I can feel it, in my soul.
582
00:36:28,686 --> 00:36:29,311
You know?
583
00:36:30,989 --> 00:36:32,149
Well, can I be honest with you?
584
00:36:33,358 --> 00:36:34,791
From what I heard, your band is...
585
00:36:35,560 --> 00:36:36,788
how do I best put this:
586
00:36:37,629 --> 00:36:38,618
God-awful.
587
00:36:39,430 --> 00:36:41,057
Fetid. Pedicular.
588
00:36:42,100 --> 00:36:43,727
And by pedicular, I mean lousy.
589
00:36:44,435 --> 00:36:45,766
I don't expect you to get it.
590
00:36:46,137 --> 00:36:47,805
People who feel the music,
591
00:36:47,805 --> 00:36:49,204
who can't live without it,
592
00:36:49,407 --> 00:36:50,374
they get it.
593
00:36:51,309 --> 00:36:52,571
Besides, we'll get better.
594
00:36:52,977 --> 00:36:53,745
Levi?
595
00:36:53,745 --> 00:36:55,110
Oh, didn't know you had company.
596
00:36:55,513 --> 00:36:56,314
This is Chance.
597
00:36:56,314 --> 00:36:57,303
He lives next door.
598
00:36:57,715 --> 00:36:59,205
How's the knee, you run today?
599
00:37:01,953 --> 00:37:04,285
Chance is writing an article on the team
for the school paper.
600
00:37:04,822 --> 00:37:05,720
That right?
601
00:37:06,190 --> 00:37:07,458
Lee's the best!
602
00:37:07,458 --> 00:37:10,621
He's gonna have U.S. university recruiters
salivating over him this year,
603
00:37:11,262 --> 00:37:12,229
right, Lee?
604
00:37:13,197 --> 00:37:14,289
Right, Dad.
605
00:37:21,539 --> 00:37:24,940
The rain in Spain
flows mainly in the plain...
606
00:37:30,181 --> 00:37:31,239
Braid my hair?
607
00:37:32,750 --> 00:37:34,652
'Split Infinitives'
608
00:37:34,652 --> 00:37:37,055
- that's a stupid name for a band, I think.
609
00:37:37,055 --> 00:37:38,955
You're a way better singer than he is.
610
00:37:40,525 --> 00:37:41,926
How is it you state things with such
611
00:37:41,926 --> 00:37:43,894
atypical certainty and authority?
612
00:37:44,562 --> 00:37:46,462
And in such a flawless, bogus accent?
613
00:37:48,066 --> 00:37:49,966
It's like you know exactly what everyone
should be doing...
614
00:37:51,035 --> 00:37:52,195
Or what they should be.
615
00:37:53,271 --> 00:37:54,761
Not what, who.
616
00:37:55,206 --> 00:37:57,140
For instance, I am a beauty queen.
617
00:37:57,342 --> 00:37:59,077
Do I push that away? No,
618
00:37:59,077 --> 00:38:00,169
I embrace it.
619
00:38:00,511 --> 00:38:03,071
And mastering this accent is the
final piece in the puzzle...
620
00:38:03,348 --> 00:38:05,612
that is, Miss U.K. Junior
twelve-and-under.
621
00:38:07,618 --> 00:38:09,313
Everyone should embrace who they are.
622
00:38:09,854 --> 00:38:10,946
Including you.
623
00:38:13,491 --> 00:38:14,892
Well, you'll learn as you get older,
624
00:38:14,892 --> 00:38:16,587
you actually know less about who you are.
625
00:38:19,197 --> 00:38:20,498
That's just silly talk.
626
00:38:20,498 --> 00:38:21,632
I know who you are.
627
00:38:21,632 --> 00:38:22,758
And what you should be.
628
00:38:26,738 --> 00:38:27,727
There you go.
629
00:38:29,507 --> 00:38:30,337
Thanks!
630
00:39:06,277 --> 00:39:08,012
Bee-rilliant!
631
00:39:08,012 --> 00:39:10,915
You really came through, Chance.
Good job!
632
00:39:10,915 --> 00:39:14,715
Hank, your photos are totally wicked!
633
00:39:15,553 --> 00:39:18,750
I think the team's going to read it
and be inspired.
634
00:39:19,223 --> 00:39:21,418
It's going to be a good season!
635
00:39:24,462 --> 00:39:25,929
They're going to blow.
636
00:39:26,264 --> 00:39:27,731
Most assuredly.
637
00:39:33,438 --> 00:39:34,769
Brilliant!
638
00:39:36,874 --> 00:39:38,307
Good to have your bender back.
639
00:39:38,509 --> 00:39:39,476
Yeah.
640
00:39:40,711 --> 00:39:42,838
So uh... I gotta ask,
641
00:39:43,081 --> 00:39:44,173
what were you thinking?
642
00:39:45,783 --> 00:39:48,047
You know, talkin' to
the jack-off for his story?
643
00:39:49,020 --> 00:39:50,721
It's just a stupid article, who cares?
644
00:39:50,721 --> 00:39:52,450
Well, everyone man.
645
00:39:53,124 --> 00:39:54,386
And now it's in print.
646
00:39:54,592 --> 00:39:55,422
Forever.
647
00:39:55,726 --> 00:39:57,929
Look, I don't know if you noticed lately,
648
00:39:57,929 --> 00:39:59,260
but we are the shit around here.
649
00:39:59,497 --> 00:40:03,126
Gods, man. And I've worked way too hard
to let you throw that away
650
00:40:03,468 --> 00:40:05,800
by hanging with some
lunatic-fringe fairy-queen.
651
00:40:06,404 --> 00:40:08,167
He's turning you into a joke, Levi.
652
00:40:08,639 --> 00:40:09,901
And you don't even see it.
653
00:40:10,208 --> 00:40:11,436
You give him too much credit.
654
00:40:11,609 --> 00:40:13,133
No, the credit's all yours!
655
00:40:15,379 --> 00:40:16,641
Stay away from him, man.
656
00:40:18,483 --> 00:40:19,643
Is that a threat?
657
00:40:31,696 --> 00:40:32,993
What are you looking for?
658
00:40:33,965 --> 00:40:35,398
A little peace and quiet.
659
00:40:44,909 --> 00:40:46,206
This was her favorite.
660
00:40:46,878 --> 00:40:48,243
It's beautifully crafted.
661
00:40:48,613 --> 00:40:50,012
Look at the beading detail.
662
00:40:50,715 --> 00:40:51,943
A timeless fashion.
663
00:40:52,316 --> 00:40:53,408
Exquisite...
664
00:40:55,987 --> 00:40:57,887
Why are you looking through
Mom's old dresses?
665
00:40:59,724 --> 00:41:01,191
Don't you have
a tiara to polish?
666
00:41:08,799 --> 00:41:09,424
Hey, Levi.
667
00:41:09,901 --> 00:41:12,665
I just wanted to say thanks again,
for aiding me with my article.
668
00:41:13,304 --> 00:41:15,966
I thought you might like some of Hank's
photos of you at soccer practice...
669
00:41:16,140 --> 00:41:17,334
Uh, hello?
670
00:41:17,909 --> 00:41:19,399
Thanks, but I'll pass.
671
00:42:17,635 --> 00:42:19,227
Chance do you have a--
672
00:42:19,670 --> 00:42:20,898
Close the door!
673
00:42:31,115 --> 00:42:32,082
It's not bad...
674
00:42:39,223 --> 00:42:41,214
Have you ever heard of lip-liner?
675
00:42:41,726 --> 00:42:42,784
Hello?!
676
00:42:42,994 --> 00:42:45,360
If Cyndi Lauper can manage it,
so can you.
677
00:42:58,042 --> 00:42:59,942
Your foundation is a tad uneven.
678
00:43:03,447 --> 00:43:05,381
Is this your outfit for school tomorrow?
679
00:43:09,587 --> 00:43:10,986
You're going to enter?
680
00:43:11,889 --> 00:43:13,948
Teenagers get to do all the fun stuff.
681
00:43:15,092 --> 00:43:18,084
I don't know how much fun it'll be
after ten minutes in heels.
682
00:43:18,896 --> 00:43:20,659
I can show you wear to put band-aids.
683
00:43:20,931 --> 00:43:22,660
They'll keep your feet from blistering.
684
00:43:24,168 --> 00:43:26,227
Hey, don't tell anyone about this.
685
00:43:26,637 --> 00:43:28,036
Especially not Sir.
686
00:43:28,906 --> 00:43:30,430
If anyone I know sees me like this,
687
00:43:30,675 --> 00:43:31,801
I am done for.
688
00:43:33,744 --> 00:43:35,507
No matter how well I pull it off.
689
00:43:41,252 --> 00:43:43,220
Jesus and Mary
and our Commander-in-Chief,
690
00:43:43,220 --> 00:43:44,021
Ronald Reagan!
691
00:43:44,021 --> 00:43:45,352
What the hell are we doing here?!
692
00:43:49,794 --> 00:43:50,852
Is that your mother's dress?
693
00:43:51,329 --> 00:43:52,591
It shouldn't go to waste.
694
00:43:52,897 --> 00:43:54,125
I did his make-up.
695
00:43:54,632 --> 00:43:57,066
Well, you did a very nice job, Honey...
696
00:43:59,303 --> 00:44:00,565
Okay.
697
00:44:04,742 --> 00:44:06,573
He wanted to spare your feelings,
698
00:44:06,944 --> 00:44:08,605
but truthfully, I could tell...
699
00:44:09,447 --> 00:44:11,176
he thinks your eye shadow is too dark.
700
00:44:12,783 --> 00:44:15,308
Doesn't anyone ever knock in this house?
701
00:45:30,661 --> 00:45:33,323
The Debbie-Gibson-Red
is definitely your color.
702
00:45:38,536 --> 00:45:39,935
Stay calm.
703
00:45:40,104 --> 00:45:44,675
Sasha means well, he thinks he can find for
every queen her name and 'inner song'.
704
00:45:44,675 --> 00:45:46,506
It only should take a second.
705
00:45:47,478 --> 00:45:48,570
Pepper Madison.
706
00:45:48,846 --> 00:45:49,778
Dancing Queen!
707
00:45:50,581 --> 00:45:51,513
Are you sure?
708
00:45:51,649 --> 00:45:54,618
Listen to me Pepper,
if you sing 'Dancing Queen'
709
00:45:54,618 --> 00:45:56,848
you will be the star performer of the night.
710
00:45:57,922 --> 00:45:59,719
I might even make you a regular.
711
00:46:02,259 --> 00:46:03,828
I didn't practice Dancing Queen.
712
00:46:03,828 --> 00:46:07,286
Don't worry, Sasha means well,
but he's a little bit funny in the head.
713
00:46:07,698 --> 00:46:10,258
He always want us to sing 'Dancing Queen.'
714
00:46:12,236 --> 00:46:13,260
Are you nervous?
715
00:46:14,171 --> 00:46:14,933
A little bit...
716
00:46:15,172 --> 00:46:15,840
Yeah...
717
00:46:15,840 --> 00:46:17,273
Okay, a lotta bit.
718
00:46:17,741 --> 00:46:19,143
Don't worry. Butterflies are good.
719
00:46:19,143 --> 00:46:20,269
But think about this:
720
00:46:20,711 --> 00:46:22,406
failure is not an option.
721
00:46:22,947 --> 00:46:25,950
And whatever you do tonight
don't turn on the mic.
722
00:46:25,950 --> 00:46:26,814
Ok?
723
00:46:27,051 --> 00:46:28,848
But you'll be a star tonight.
724
00:47:17,067 --> 00:47:19,403
Claire Vuoyant everyone...
725
00:47:19,403 --> 00:47:20,700
always hard to top.
726
00:47:21,138 --> 00:47:25,409
In fact, I have it on good authority
she has her ass tattooed:
727
00:47:25,409 --> 00:47:26,933
'No Entry.'
728
00:47:27,411 --> 00:47:29,140
'For eight-inches and under.'
729
00:47:30,581 --> 00:47:33,141
Okay, let's keep this train-wreck
of a night going.
730
00:47:33,684 --> 00:47:36,453
Next up is a first-timer, so ladies,
731
00:47:36,453 --> 00:47:39,081
keep those beer bottles in your
mouths where they belong.
732
00:47:39,623 --> 00:47:43,081
Here she is: Lucky Chance!
733
00:48:30,708 --> 00:48:33,040
I was bom to run
734
00:48:33,544 --> 00:48:35,603
I was born to dream
735
00:48:36,146 --> 00:48:38,580
Craziest boy you've ever seen
736
00:48:39,216 --> 00:48:41,548
I've gotta do it my way
737
00:48:42,620 --> 00:48:44,918
Or no way at all
738
00:48:45,789 --> 00:48:48,417
And I was here to please
739
00:48:48,993 --> 00:48:50,858
I'm even on my knees
740
00:48:51,061 --> 00:48:53,825
Making love to whoever I please
741
00:48:54,231 --> 00:48:56,893
I've gotta do it my way
742
00:48:57,501 --> 00:48:59,833
Or no way at all
743
00:49:00,537 --> 00:49:02,767
And then you came around
744
00:49:03,073 --> 00:49:04,904
Tryin' to tie me down
745
00:49:05,275 --> 00:49:07,106
I was such a clown
746
00:49:07,678 --> 00:49:10,078
You had to have it your way
747
00:49:10,881 --> 00:49:13,076
Or no way at all
748
00:49:14,685 --> 00:49:17,677
Why don't you turn me loose
749
00:49:18,455 --> 00:49:21,618
Turn me loose, turn me loose
750
00:49:23,160 --> 00:49:25,458
I've gotta have it my way
751
00:49:27,297 --> 00:49:29,629
Or no way at all
752
00:49:30,668 --> 00:49:33,762
Why don't you turn me loose
753
00:49:34,304 --> 00:49:37,899
Turn me loose, turn me loose
754
00:49:39,043 --> 00:49:41,603
I've gotta have it my way
755
00:49:43,080 --> 00:49:45,480
Or no way at all
756
00:49:47,584 --> 00:49:49,987
And I'm here to please
757
00:49:49,987 --> 00:49:52,122
Even on my knees
758
00:49:52,122 --> 00:49:55,023
Making love to whoever I please
759
00:49:55,559 --> 00:49:58,221
I've gotta do it my way
760
00:50:49,613 --> 00:50:50,602
What's going on?
761
00:50:52,783 --> 00:50:54,774
The Split Infinitives have officially...
762
00:50:55,886 --> 00:50:56,614
split.
763
00:50:58,288 --> 00:51:00,017
Grammar police cracking down?
764
00:51:01,759 --> 00:51:03,784
Look Chance, I don't mean
to be a jerk or nothing, but--
765
00:51:04,094 --> 00:51:06,119
But you just decided to be one anyway.
766
00:51:09,500 --> 00:51:11,468
Listen, I can't really hang with you anymore.
767
00:51:12,703 --> 00:51:15,205
My dad's being a hard-ass about football,
768
00:51:15,205 --> 00:51:17,366
and concentrating on getting a scholarship.
769
00:51:19,009 --> 00:51:20,567
That's why he made you quit the band?
770
00:51:22,746 --> 00:51:25,214
What happened to your whole
'music is my life' mantra?
771
00:51:26,283 --> 00:51:26,942
Well,
772
00:51:27,751 --> 00:51:30,015
it's like you said, we're...
What was it?
773
00:51:30,487 --> 00:51:31,283
Pedicular?
774
00:51:32,923 --> 00:51:34,083
So, no big loss.
775
00:51:35,025 --> 00:51:37,994
I don't know a meteor could hit the earth,
causing you to get better.
776
00:51:38,829 --> 00:51:40,319
I think I saw it once in an Ed Wood film.
777
00:51:44,101 --> 00:51:45,966
I know the real reason you
don't want to be seen with me.
778
00:51:47,204 --> 00:51:48,193
It's not what you think.
779
00:51:48,872 --> 00:51:50,066
I don't care that you dig guys.
780
00:51:52,509 --> 00:51:53,806
I believe that.
781
00:51:55,012 --> 00:51:56,912
But you do care
if other people think you do...
782
00:51:58,348 --> 00:51:59,781
by way of association.
783
00:52:01,785 --> 00:52:03,946
I never realized Brad had
so much sway over you.
784
00:52:05,455 --> 00:52:07,024
Usually the drummer is the most expendable.
785
00:52:07,024 --> 00:52:08,725
Look, I don't expect you to get it.
786
00:52:08,725 --> 00:52:09,987
There's a news flash.
787
00:52:10,160 --> 00:52:11,889
You don't expect me to get much, do you?
788
00:52:12,563 --> 00:52:14,963
Continually underestimating me
for some unknown reason.
789
00:52:17,434 --> 00:52:19,136
You're not as complicated
as you think you are.
790
00:52:19,136 --> 00:52:20,125
How the hell would you know?
791
00:52:20,771 --> 00:52:21,999
I'm a teenager, too.
792
00:52:23,106 --> 00:52:24,869
And infinitely
more complicated than you.
793
00:52:26,310 --> 00:52:27,140
Is that so?
794
00:52:29,780 --> 00:52:31,771
I don't see any dresses in your closet.
795
00:52:36,153 --> 00:52:37,120
It's okay.
796
00:52:38,488 --> 00:52:40,183
Guys like you are never friends
with the likes of me.
797
00:52:41,358 --> 00:52:43,258
So in that regard,
you turned out true to form.
798
00:52:46,230 --> 00:52:47,094
Ouch.
799
00:52:51,001 --> 00:52:53,060
Someday, you're gonna have
to stand up to people.
800
00:52:54,538 --> 00:52:55,527
People like Brad...
801
00:52:56,974 --> 00:52:57,804
like your father.
802
00:52:59,643 --> 00:53:01,474
Eventually maybe even yourself.
803
00:53:21,231 --> 00:53:24,200
So, how's your
revenge-on-Brad plan coming?
804
00:53:24,935 --> 00:53:26,129
Yeah, what you got?
805
00:53:27,170 --> 00:53:28,102
A headache.
806
00:53:28,805 --> 00:53:30,540
Besides, I think
he's forgotten about me.
807
00:53:30,540 --> 00:53:32,235
I'm off his radar.
808
00:53:35,012 --> 00:53:35,910
Jerk!
809
00:53:36,246 --> 00:53:36,871
Hey!
810
00:53:37,314 --> 00:53:38,178
Look, Whoopi,
811
00:53:38,782 --> 00:53:41,751
it ain't my fault his big fat face
got in the way, okay?
812
00:53:42,786 --> 00:53:43,946
Hey! Marquis...
813
00:53:44,221 --> 00:53:45,381
next time, duck.
814
00:53:45,923 --> 00:53:46,947
Like the chicken you are.
815
00:53:47,491 --> 00:53:48,788
That makes no sense.
816
00:53:49,459 --> 00:53:50,994
On a pure poultry level.
817
00:53:50,994 --> 00:53:52,329
Hey! Jimmy Olsen,
818
00:53:52,329 --> 00:53:53,563
no one's talking to you.
819
00:53:53,563 --> 00:53:54,998
Why are you so angry all the time?
820
00:53:54,998 --> 00:53:56,329
What did I even do to you?
821
00:53:56,967 --> 00:53:58,400
Invaded my school.
822
00:53:59,036 --> 00:54:02,062
I mean, your presence alone is enough
to make me wanna puke.
823
00:54:02,205 --> 00:54:03,536
Don't you get it man?
824
00:54:04,374 --> 00:54:05,534
You don't belong here.
825
00:54:08,745 --> 00:54:09,939
So, leave.
826
00:54:11,081 --> 00:54:13,072
Fairy Academy is back in the states.
827
00:54:13,784 --> 00:54:15,149
They're waiting for you.
828
00:54:16,720 --> 00:54:17,778
Let's go, man.
829
00:54:21,525 --> 00:54:23,720
Forget about it man,
well beat him up tomorrow.
830
00:54:29,666 --> 00:54:33,067
So, what was that all about being
'off his radar'?
831
00:54:34,037 --> 00:54:35,595
A man can't go on like this.
832
00:54:35,872 --> 00:54:37,100
Or you, even.
833
00:54:38,208 --> 00:54:39,368
Do something!
834
00:54:40,711 --> 00:54:42,679
I know why he's so angry all the time.
835
00:54:46,683 --> 00:54:47,918
This plan is unwise.
836
00:54:47,918 --> 00:54:49,249
Not to mention, uncouth.
837
00:54:50,153 --> 00:54:52,417
It's high-risk, I agree.
838
00:54:52,889 --> 00:54:54,823
Grow some balls! The both of you.
839
00:54:55,058 --> 00:54:58,095
And stop talking like
a forty-year-old British fop.
840
00:54:58,095 --> 00:54:59,153
It's bizarro.
841
00:55:01,231 --> 00:55:02,596
If I do like this--
842
00:55:03,967 --> 00:55:04,592
Abort.
843
00:55:05,769 --> 00:55:06,861
and if I do this-
844
00:55:07,971 --> 00:55:10,273
Then the abort is off and we're back on.
845
00:55:10,273 --> 00:55:12,503
But then, if I do...
846
00:55:12,976 --> 00:55:15,444
Mr. Samsonite, shut it!
847
00:55:39,369 --> 00:55:42,634
Okay, Air Craft Carrier Smelker
has passed.
848
00:55:43,073 --> 00:55:43,732
C'mon!
849
00:55:59,523 --> 00:56:01,286
I need to see the nurse!
850
00:56:02,259 --> 00:56:03,460
I'm dying.
851
00:56:03,460 --> 00:56:04,927
Not before I get a petition form.
852
00:56:05,395 --> 00:56:09,695
The food at this institution is not fit for
sub-species consumption, let alone humans.
853
00:56:10,233 --> 00:56:13,066
One at a time, boys, please I am alone here.
854
00:56:15,705 --> 00:56:16,865
Are you okay?
855
00:56:18,909 --> 00:56:19,967
Oh my God!
856
00:56:24,047 --> 00:56:25,105
What's wrong with him?
857
00:56:25,382 --> 00:56:27,184
You know, I'm certainly no medical expert, but...
858
00:56:27,184 --> 00:56:29,049
...from the looks of it...
859
00:56:29,719 --> 00:56:31,414
I'd say... He's dying!
860
00:56:43,700 --> 00:56:44,901
It's moved from his throat!
861
00:56:44,901 --> 00:56:45,993
Maybe it's a parasite.
862
00:56:46,603 --> 00:56:48,071
I'm calling the nurse!
863
00:56:48,071 --> 00:56:49,197
Don't leave me!
864
00:56:49,406 --> 00:56:50,532
Not yet.
865
00:57:10,927 --> 00:57:12,519
Stay away from the light...
866
00:57:13,029 --> 00:57:14,621
Stay away from the light...
867
00:57:20,203 --> 00:57:21,602
I think he's trying to confess.
868
00:57:22,072 --> 00:57:24,233
Are you properly trained
in the giving of last rites?
869
00:57:24,841 --> 00:57:25,899
I don't know.
870
00:57:25,976 --> 00:57:28,035
Oh no! Don't go, Hank!..
871
00:57:28,278 --> 00:57:29,176
Don't go...
872
00:57:29,346 --> 00:57:32,716
GO!..He was so sweet--
873
00:57:32,716 --> 00:57:33,944
I'm okay...
874
00:57:35,819 --> 00:57:37,218
What's happening here?
875
00:57:37,521 --> 00:57:38,351
Allergies.
876
00:57:38,555 --> 00:57:39,715
They come and go.
877
00:57:40,824 --> 00:57:42,724
You were very comforting, though.
878
00:57:43,126 --> 00:57:46,527
Oh...you know...and on second thought...
the food is just fine.
879
00:57:53,870 --> 00:57:55,167
You got the combination?
880
00:57:55,438 --> 00:57:57,963
She might smell,
but at least her files are organized.
881
00:57:58,141 --> 00:57:59,733
So, when do we do it?
882
00:57:59,976 --> 00:58:01,044
After school.
883
00:58:01,044 --> 00:58:03,911
We just broke into
the Vice Principal's office!
884
00:58:04,047 --> 00:58:06,345
Knowing Smelker, she could parlay
that into my beheading.
885
00:58:06,650 --> 00:58:09,252
Dammit Marquis,
don't wussy out on me.
886
00:58:09,252 --> 00:58:11,720
Or do you like getting smacked
in the face by balls?
887
00:58:12,589 --> 00:58:13,613
Don't answer that.
888
00:58:14,090 --> 00:58:18,493
All I'm trying to say, if you want Brad to keep
wailing on you, then fine--
889
00:58:21,731 --> 00:58:22,663
Wait, wait, NO!
890
00:58:23,466 --> 00:58:26,060
Let me just see what's in his locker first,
then I'll decide.
891
00:58:33,610 --> 00:58:35,009
Someone loves himself.
892
00:58:35,812 --> 00:58:37,211
Hey! Wait up!
893
00:58:44,154 --> 00:58:45,121
What's that?
894
00:58:47,691 --> 00:58:49,682
The holy grail...
895
00:58:51,027 --> 00:58:51,925
'Roid Rage.
896
00:58:52,262 --> 00:58:54,355
He's been on it
for at least a year.
897
00:58:54,598 --> 00:58:55,860
How do you know all this?
898
00:58:56,266 --> 00:58:58,359
Toni Durazo, his fetching girlfriend,
899
00:58:58,802 --> 00:59:00,099
sits next to me in photo.
900
00:59:01,204 --> 00:59:03,006
Her best friend Rachel is behind me
901
00:59:03,006 --> 00:59:04,769
and when notes pass, I'm the go-between.
902
00:59:05,075 --> 00:59:06,906
Sometimes they don't bother to fold them.
903
00:59:07,110 --> 00:59:08,278
And this one time, Toni asked me--
904
00:59:08,278 --> 00:59:09,575
Okay, got it.
905
00:59:09,913 --> 00:59:12,575
You can read and you've got
a hard-on for Toni.
906
00:59:12,749 --> 00:59:14,148
So fascinating!
907
00:59:15,118 --> 00:59:16,847
What do we do now exactly?
908
00:59:17,187 --> 00:59:18,381
What do we do now?
909
00:59:19,923 --> 00:59:21,982
A student taking steroids...
910
00:59:22,559 --> 00:59:23,753
We blow the whistle.
911
00:59:24,427 --> 00:59:27,396
Brad gets caught red handed & BOOM!
912
00:59:27,497 --> 00:59:29,699
Expulsion. Poof!
913
00:59:29,699 --> 00:59:32,634
Gone from Brickland like
a bad case of ringworm.
914
00:59:33,003 --> 00:59:35,699
It's so perfect,
it makes me want to cry.
915
00:59:36,673 --> 00:59:37,537
How?...
916
00:59:39,109 --> 00:59:40,633
Does it go down, I mean?
917
00:59:41,244 --> 00:59:42,734
Go down?
918
00:59:45,282 --> 00:59:46,613
An anonymous tip.
919
00:59:48,218 --> 00:59:50,287
Seize the day, Chance.
920
00:59:50,287 --> 00:59:53,256
Rid our society from
pond-scum like Brad Harden.
921
00:59:53,456 --> 00:59:56,126
Opportunities like this
don't come along every day.
922
00:59:56,126 --> 01:00:00,062
So remember,
it's survival of the smartest.
923
01:00:05,502 --> 01:00:07,470
I know where you live, Dorkus.
924
01:00:09,439 --> 01:00:10,906
Hey, lighten up.
925
01:00:11,074 --> 01:00:12,837
I don't really think you're a dorkus.
926
01:00:13,376 --> 01:00:14,308
I know you don't.
927
01:00:15,312 --> 01:00:18,214
Why is it you so often
forget my superior intellect...
928
01:00:18,214 --> 01:00:21,451
and nascent ability to process your rudimentary
attempts at sarcasm?--
929
01:00:21,451 --> 01:00:24,215
Shut it! Before I
purposely drive into a pole.
930
01:00:27,223 --> 01:00:28,713
So, um...
931
01:00:30,894 --> 01:00:32,623
...when did you know you were...
932
01:00:34,364 --> 01:00:35,262
...you know...
933
01:00:37,000 --> 01:00:38,262
A homosexual?
934
01:00:39,536 --> 01:00:42,027
I don't know. When did you know
you were a breeder?
935
01:00:42,238 --> 01:00:44,468
Still not completely sure if I am.
936
01:00:44,974 --> 01:00:48,205
I've set for eighteen to twenty-three
to be my 'experimental years.'
937
01:00:48,445 --> 01:00:49,469
I have a plan.
938
01:00:51,581 --> 01:00:52,479
Four.
939
01:00:54,184 --> 01:00:55,276
Four what?
940
01:00:56,052 --> 01:00:57,314
When I was four,
941
01:00:58,788 --> 01:01:02,121
my dear-departed mother took me to a
production of The Nutcracker.
942
01:01:02,459 --> 01:01:06,190
It was colorful, and dramatic
and the music was great.
943
01:01:06,696 --> 01:01:09,256
But just one thing held my attention
above everything else:
944
01:01:11,000 --> 01:01:12,126
a dancer.
945
01:01:13,470 --> 01:01:14,402
Male.
946
01:01:15,372 --> 01:01:17,135
Shirtless through the entire play.
947
01:01:19,909 --> 01:01:22,070
I couldn't stop looking at him.
948
01:01:23,947 --> 01:01:27,041
Of course, I didn't really understand
why then, but...
949
01:01:29,319 --> 01:01:30,479
I do now.
950
01:01:31,988 --> 01:01:33,421
Very touching, Marquis.
951
01:01:33,556 --> 01:01:35,421
Excuse me while I vomit.
952
01:01:38,361 --> 01:01:40,029
Look, I don't care if you're gay,
953
01:01:40,029 --> 01:01:42,065
but most people in school do.
954
01:01:42,065 --> 01:01:42,554
So...
955
01:01:44,567 --> 01:01:45,864
It's just...
956
01:01:46,536 --> 01:01:48,902
If that alone
makes you such a huge target,
957
01:01:49,606 --> 01:01:53,064
why do you give 'em more ammo
by acting and dressing the way you do?
958
01:01:55,011 --> 01:01:56,069
Well,
959
01:01:56,513 --> 01:01:59,849
if you have the choice between being
ostracized for wearing a weird hat,
960
01:01:59,849 --> 01:02:00,611
or being gay...
961
01:02:01,951 --> 01:02:03,248
which one would you pick?
962
01:02:05,488 --> 01:02:06,648
Thanks for the ride home.
963
01:02:08,858 --> 01:02:10,485
And thanks for looking out for me.
964
01:02:28,845 --> 01:02:30,938
I loved your football pictures in the paper.
965
01:02:32,515 --> 01:02:33,573
You did?
966
01:02:36,920 --> 01:02:37,716
Thanks.
967
01:02:41,191 --> 01:02:42,488
Can I see?
968
01:02:43,159 --> 01:02:43,921
Umm...
969
01:02:48,364 --> 01:02:49,422
Sure.
970
01:02:51,768 --> 01:02:52,996
These are great.
971
01:02:53,536 --> 01:02:55,265
Who is this? Your sister?
972
01:02:56,005 --> 01:02:57,302
Not exactly.
973
01:03:02,879 --> 01:03:03,846
Is that...
974
01:03:05,515 --> 01:03:06,880
...Chance?
975
01:03:09,919 --> 01:03:10,954
Yeah!
976
01:03:10,954 --> 01:03:16,559
We went to this club in the city and he
performed with a bunch of other drag queens.
977
01:03:16,559 --> 01:03:18,083
It was great!
978
01:03:18,394 --> 01:03:19,952
He was awesome!
979
01:03:22,899 --> 01:03:25,197
Did you take these for the school paper?
980
01:03:26,903 --> 01:03:29,463
No. I'm just developing them for Chance.
981
01:03:30,039 --> 01:03:30,903
I mean...
982
01:03:31,407 --> 01:03:33,967
I don't think he really wants
anyone to know...
983
01:03:34,110 --> 01:03:34,872
you know?
984
01:03:35,111 --> 01:03:35,805
Oh,
985
01:03:36,546 --> 01:03:37,672
sure, yeah.
986
01:03:38,014 --> 01:03:39,879
His secret's safe with me.
987
01:03:41,985 --> 01:03:44,613
Umm... Hey, do you have
988
01:03:44,687 --> 01:03:47,554
any high-gloss paper I could borrow?
989
01:03:47,857 --> 01:03:48,881
Sure...
990
01:03:49,792 --> 01:03:52,784
Oh, I left it in the classroom.
991
01:03:56,966 --> 01:03:57,933
I'll go get it.
992
01:04:14,217 --> 01:04:18,721
All I know is I didn't risk my life
sneaking into Smelt-her's office
993
01:04:18,721 --> 01:04:21,155
to get information you're not
even gonna use now!
994
01:04:21,491 --> 01:04:22,253
But...
995
01:04:22,358 --> 01:04:24,794
I continue to appreciate the
creation of the plan
996
01:04:24,794 --> 01:04:26,625
and its stealth-like deployment.
997
01:04:29,532 --> 01:04:31,932
Yours is a leadership even my
father would hold dear.
998
01:04:32,402 --> 01:04:35,064
But I hate to point out the fact that you
didn't actually risk your life.
999
01:04:36,706 --> 01:04:39,004
Have you ever been in that office?
1000
01:04:39,542 --> 01:04:42,602
It took everything in me
to avoid asphyxiation.
1001
01:04:45,114 --> 01:04:46,081
Point taken.
1002
01:04:47,083 --> 01:04:49,176
So you're just gonna let Brad
keep beating on you?
1003
01:04:49,886 --> 01:04:51,046
UHH! Ahh!
1004
01:04:51,888 --> 01:04:53,923
Look, I've been
in this situation before...
1005
01:04:53,923 --> 01:04:57,415
eventually Brad will get tired of me and
move on to helpless freshmen.
1006
01:04:57,860 --> 01:04:58,792
Puppies.
1007
01:04:59,295 --> 01:05:00,363
And speaking frankly...
1008
01:05:00,363 --> 01:05:01,631
tattletale-ing is beneath me.
1009
01:05:01,631 --> 01:05:02,791
And you for that matter.
1010
01:05:02,932 --> 01:05:05,196
He's not going to move on, Chance.
1011
01:05:05,501 --> 01:05:06,703
I know his kind.
1012
01:05:06,703 --> 01:05:10,469
Brad is like a cat toying with a mouse
before going in for the kill.
1013
01:05:14,477 --> 01:05:17,614
You act like
none of this stuff bothers you,
1014
01:05:17,614 --> 01:05:18,842
like it's a nuisance.
1015
01:05:19,515 --> 01:05:21,117
You talk a good game.
1016
01:05:21,117 --> 01:05:25,417
It even made me think that you were
strong...like everyone underestimates you.
1017
01:05:25,588 --> 01:05:27,857
But that's all it is:
1018
01:05:27,857 --> 01:05:28,846
talk.
1019
01:05:29,292 --> 01:05:30,816
You're a coward, Chance.
1020
01:05:31,694 --> 01:05:32,718
A mouse.
1021
01:05:33,296 --> 01:05:34,627
Brad's mouse.
1022
01:05:37,834 --> 01:05:39,233
Marquis, you're out!
1023
01:05:41,070 --> 01:05:42,230
Dear students,
1024
01:05:42,472 --> 01:05:45,908
do not forget
your essays for next Monday.
1025
01:05:47,110 --> 01:05:51,206
You should write 500 words,
not less,
1026
01:05:51,481 --> 01:05:54,450
and I have a
very nice reading task for you:
1027
01:05:54,917 --> 01:05:57,715
you should read Act One of Macbeth,
1028
01:05:57,954 --> 01:06:01,117
one of Shakespeare's greatest tragedies.
1029
01:06:01,591 --> 01:06:04,287
There is also a reminder
on the blackboard,
1030
01:06:04,594 --> 01:06:07,290
you do not use cliff notes, okay?
1031
01:06:08,431 --> 01:06:10,194
Time for literature now...
1032
01:06:11,434 --> 01:06:14,232
this book: The Count of Monte Cristo
1033
01:06:14,637 --> 01:06:18,937
written by Alexandre Dumas...
1034
01:06:19,342 --> 01:06:23,142
Oh man, Boy-George is so going to wish he
never stepped foot in this school.
1035
01:06:39,929 --> 01:06:40,827
Hey Cadet,...
1036
01:06:41,931 --> 01:06:42,898
come on in here.
1037
01:06:44,801 --> 01:06:45,961
I thought we'd do this together.
1038
01:06:46,936 --> 01:06:47,925
Hai!
1039
01:07:10,226 --> 01:07:11,625
You gotta be tough, Chance.
1040
01:07:12,261 --> 01:07:13,853
It's the only way
to survive in this life.
1041
01:07:14,430 --> 01:07:16,591
Did it ever occur to you that maybe
I already am tough?
1042
01:07:16,833 --> 01:07:18,601
What? No, that's not what I meant-
1043
01:07:18,601 --> 01:07:19,295
I didn't think so.
1044
01:07:19,669 --> 01:07:20,770
But then again, why would you
1045
01:07:20,770 --> 01:07:23,806
when you've spent your entire adult life
being trained to discern that
1046
01:07:23,806 --> 01:07:25,637
which is only directly in
front of your face?
1047
01:07:26,109 --> 01:07:28,611
So when you look at me,
all you see is everything you aren't.
1048
01:07:28,611 --> 01:07:29,779
And would never want to be.
1049
01:07:29,779 --> 01:07:31,041
You don't see strength...
1050
01:07:31,547 --> 01:07:34,183
just cowardice and, let's face it, a big fag!
1051
01:07:34,183 --> 01:07:35,318
So if you'll excuse me,
1052
01:07:35,318 --> 01:07:37,377
I have a field of daisies
to go frolic through!
1053
01:07:38,221 --> 01:07:40,655
What did I tell you about using
that word in this house!
1054
01:07:48,664 --> 01:07:52,031
Hey, my girlfriend needs some lipstick,
can you help her out?
1055
01:09:29,799 --> 01:09:31,630
Someone must have swiped it.
1056
01:09:32,335 --> 01:09:33,769
Perceptive beyond belief.
1057
01:09:33,769 --> 01:09:34,837
It's impossible.
1058
01:09:34,837 --> 01:09:36,065
I was extra careful.
1059
01:09:36,172 --> 01:09:38,663
No one even saw them, except for...
1060
01:09:41,244 --> 01:09:42,211
Oh...
1061
01:09:43,446 --> 01:09:44,413
Oh...
1062
01:09:46,582 --> 01:09:48,482
Before you say anything,
1063
01:09:49,118 --> 01:09:51,313
just remember, she's very fetching.
1064
01:09:51,854 --> 01:09:53,890
And I'm a teenager in high school
1065
01:09:53,890 --> 01:09:55,289
who's not having sex.
1066
01:09:56,292 --> 01:09:58,954
You showed these to Toni Durazo?!
1067
01:10:00,630 --> 01:10:02,765
She's Brad's girlfriend...
1068
01:10:02,765 --> 01:10:04,300
you idiot!
1069
01:10:04,300 --> 01:10:06,461
What are you,
sniffing on photo chemicals again?!
1070
01:10:09,338 --> 01:10:11,363
It's like a voodoo spell, I think...
1071
01:10:13,342 --> 01:10:14,744
Look on the positive side,
1072
01:10:14,744 --> 01:10:17,372
it's definitely one of my better shots.
1073
01:10:18,147 --> 01:10:19,205
Ow!
1074
01:10:22,018 --> 01:10:23,280
It'll blow over.
1075
01:10:24,020 --> 01:10:26,250
I don't know if you've noticed,
but this is high school.
1076
01:10:26,622 --> 01:10:27,924
Things don't 'blow over'.
1077
01:10:27,924 --> 01:10:29,755
They stay with you forever...
1078
01:10:30,826 --> 01:10:32,191
like low self-esteem.
1079
01:10:34,764 --> 01:10:37,633
May I take this opportunity
to mention that
1080
01:10:37,633 --> 01:10:41,069
an anonymous phone call is still
very much an option.
1081
01:10:41,938 --> 01:10:43,973
The cat is no longer toying,
1082
01:10:43,973 --> 01:10:46,134
and its teeth are
in the mouse's neck.
1083
01:10:46,575 --> 01:10:48,372
It's not how I fight my battles.
1084
01:10:53,115 --> 01:10:54,912
This isn't just going to go away....
1085
01:11:07,830 --> 01:11:11,664
C'mon Marquis, English Lit rates
at least a ballroom gown, Man.
1086
01:11:17,039 --> 01:11:20,406
So exactly how mad does your mom get
when you steal her bras, huh?
1087
01:11:22,645 --> 01:11:24,246
...Or her tits, for that matter.
1088
01:11:24,246 --> 01:11:25,543
Shut up!
1089
01:11:38,227 --> 01:11:40,695
You do this sort of thing often?
1090
01:11:42,365 --> 01:11:43,457
One time.
1091
01:11:44,734 --> 01:11:46,861
That's all it usually takes.
1092
01:11:49,138 --> 01:11:50,969
They can't handle this, you know...
1093
01:11:51,941 --> 01:11:53,272
The students here.
1094
01:11:54,110 --> 01:11:59,047
They tolerate the misfits among them,
but if you rub their faces in it...
1095
01:12:00,282 --> 01:12:04,241
That's too much for the hormone-engorged
teenager to deal with.
1096
01:12:07,123 --> 01:12:08,351
So now what?
1097
01:12:09,759 --> 01:12:12,353
You need to find a way for
them to handle it.
1098
01:12:12,895 --> 01:12:14,096
Otherwise,
1099
01:12:14,096 --> 01:12:16,929
I don't really see a future for you
here at Brickland.
1100
01:12:19,702 --> 01:12:22,227
This will excuse you
for the rest of the week.
1101
01:12:26,175 --> 01:12:28,700
Use the time to think.
1102
01:12:31,280 --> 01:12:33,077
We'll have the flyers removed.
1103
01:12:41,123 --> 01:12:42,351
Where's your brother?
1104
01:12:42,491 --> 01:12:44,220
Said he's not feeling well.
1105
01:12:56,105 --> 01:12:57,003
Hi.
1106
01:12:57,139 --> 01:12:59,073
Is, uh, Chance around?
1107
01:12:59,341 --> 01:13:00,308
Who are you?
1108
01:13:00,509 --> 01:13:02,238
He's Chance's ex-friend from next door.
1109
01:13:02,912 --> 01:13:04,243
He has his own band.
1110
01:13:05,347 --> 01:13:06,371
Chance is upstairs.
1111
01:13:20,796 --> 01:13:22,354
Here to revel in Brad's victory?
1112
01:13:23,365 --> 01:13:24,696
Kind of a tough day, huh?
1113
01:13:26,202 --> 01:13:27,803
Why? Were you
tarred and feathered, too?
1114
01:13:27,803 --> 01:13:28,895
I hadn't noticed.
1115
01:13:30,673 --> 01:13:31,662
Look,
1116
01:13:32,308 --> 01:13:34,708
I'm the first to admit
Brad crossed a line.
1117
01:13:36,145 --> 01:13:37,578
What he did was...
1118
01:13:38,881 --> 01:13:40,712
...was expose me for who I really am?
1119
01:13:42,251 --> 01:13:43,650
Maybe I should be thanking him.
1120
01:13:44,520 --> 01:13:45,554
This might surprise you, Levi,
1121
01:13:45,554 --> 01:13:47,488
but I'm not embarassed
about what happened.
1122
01:13:48,491 --> 01:13:49,617
If you say so.
1123
01:13:50,626 --> 01:13:54,562
It just sort of looked that way when you
were ripping that flyer off the wall.
1124
01:13:55,865 --> 01:13:58,663
So now everyone thinks I'm ashamed of
the fact that I dressed in drag.
1125
01:14:00,302 --> 01:14:02,065
Like it was some horrible secret.
1126
01:14:02,972 --> 01:14:05,741
When the truth is, the guy
who goes to school every day...
1127
01:14:05,741 --> 01:14:07,072
he's the lie.
1128
01:14:09,211 --> 01:14:12,078
Why do I let it be okay for people
to think less of me?
1129
01:14:13,883 --> 01:14:17,375
...for my friends just to decide they
no longer wanna be my friends.
1130
01:14:21,257 --> 01:14:23,555
Man, I take all of it..
1131
01:14:24,393 --> 01:14:26,623
and I try to rise above it.
1132
01:14:28,397 --> 01:14:31,389
But I don't think you're supposed
to do that in high school.
1133
01:14:31,967 --> 01:14:34,697
Nothing heroic ever came of 'rising above it.'
1134
01:14:38,040 --> 01:14:39,530
Hey! What do you write in that?
1135
01:14:40,609 --> 01:14:42,474
My brilliant and insightful thoughts.
1136
01:14:45,381 --> 01:14:47,679
And some poems, song lyrics...
1137
01:14:48,250 --> 01:14:49,185
Lyrics?
1138
01:14:49,185 --> 01:14:50,243
You write songs?
1139
01:14:52,755 --> 01:14:53,744
What?
1140
01:14:54,056 --> 01:14:55,683
C'mon. Suddenly you're shy?
1141
01:14:55,991 --> 01:14:57,960
I thought they were
brilliant and insightful.
1142
01:14:57,960 --> 01:14:58,927
They are.
1143
01:14:59,161 --> 01:15:00,856
And potentially highly embarrassing.
1144
01:15:05,801 --> 01:15:07,234
Hey, you know what?
1145
01:15:07,469 --> 01:15:09,096
Why don't we write a song.
1146
01:15:09,705 --> 01:15:11,730
I'll do the music, you write the lyrics.
1147
01:15:12,975 --> 01:15:13,964
Okay.
1148
01:15:18,080 --> 01:15:20,913
I thought your father banned
music from your heart.
1149
01:15:21,217 --> 01:15:23,515
Oh yeah, that.
1150
01:15:25,054 --> 01:15:28,717
Well, like you said,
I have to stand up to him someday.
1151
01:15:29,858 --> 01:15:33,521
So...Screw Lawrence and his scholarships.
1152
01:15:36,398 --> 01:15:38,923
So... Are we cool?
1153
01:15:51,013 --> 01:15:52,037
Chance?!
1154
01:16:01,090 --> 01:16:02,682
Is your brother really sick?
1155
01:16:04,426 --> 01:16:05,916
Okay, what's the deal?
1156
01:16:06,462 --> 01:16:07,796
Apparently his entire school
1157
01:16:07,796 --> 01:16:10,287
found out he dressed up in drag
and performed at a club.
1158
01:16:10,833 --> 01:16:11,800
What?!
1159
01:16:12,368 --> 01:16:14,461
Then they put his picture
on a bunch of flyers
1160
01:16:14,870 --> 01:16:18,897
labelling him an embarrassment to all that is
held holy in the high school male.
1161
01:16:21,477 --> 01:16:23,775
Why can't you kids have normal problems?
1162
01:16:24,146 --> 01:16:25,238
Like acne.
1163
01:16:27,182 --> 01:16:28,274
Time for school.
1164
01:16:35,624 --> 01:16:37,524
Well, he's not at the loser-table...
1165
01:16:38,527 --> 01:16:39,892
...he wasn't in Lit...
1166
01:16:41,297 --> 01:16:44,130
Looks like
'Operation: Get-Rid-Of-Fag' worked.
1167
01:16:46,335 --> 01:16:47,563
Stop calling him that.
1168
01:16:49,338 --> 01:16:50,737
What'd you say Sparks?
1169
01:16:51,373 --> 01:16:53,102
This wasn't cool.
1170
01:16:53,409 --> 01:16:56,139
If he wants to dress up like a girl,
that's his business.
1171
01:16:57,980 --> 01:17:01,746
How'd you like it if everyone knew you fooled
around with Kenny Ellis in sixth grade?
1172
01:17:05,120 --> 01:17:06,588
So tell me Sparks,
1173
01:17:06,588 --> 01:17:08,613
when exactly did you grow a pair, huh?
1174
01:17:09,358 --> 01:17:11,656
When I figured out
you don't really have friends.
1175
01:17:12,561 --> 01:17:14,927
Just subjects who live in fear of you.
1176
01:17:17,399 --> 01:17:18,991
You don't want to do this, Man.
1177
01:17:19,468 --> 01:17:20,492
Trust me,
1178
01:17:20,769 --> 01:17:22,669
you don't want to go there with me.
1179
01:17:23,339 --> 01:17:25,933
You know what, Brad?
I feel sorry for you.
1180
01:17:26,909 --> 01:17:29,139
Because right here, right now...
1181
01:17:29,745 --> 01:17:32,145
is the best it'll ever be for you.
1182
01:17:32,514 --> 01:17:34,539
Well, you never were too bright.
1183
01:17:40,422 --> 01:17:41,980
Take your best shot.
1184
01:17:49,798 --> 01:17:50,856
Brad!
1185
01:17:52,434 --> 01:17:53,662
Are you okay?
1186
01:17:55,270 --> 01:17:56,794
Oh my God, you're like... bleeding.
1187
01:17:58,841 --> 01:18:01,867
Yeah, that's what I thought would happen.
1188
01:18:11,053 --> 01:18:12,281
Are you looking for something?
1189
01:18:13,088 --> 01:18:14,419
Inspiration.
1190
01:18:25,768 --> 01:18:29,363
You know, Chance, there's a link
between inspiration and perspiration.
1191
01:18:31,240 --> 01:18:33,105
What you need is focus.
1192
01:18:34,877 --> 01:18:37,246
How about I send you back Stateside.
1193
01:18:37,246 --> 01:18:39,314
I found a military academy
in the Midwest--
1194
01:18:39,314 --> 01:18:40,576
Please...
1195
01:18:40,983 --> 01:18:42,245
Just stop.
1196
01:18:43,552 --> 01:18:47,079
I'm never gonna understand you the way
your mother did, I know that.
1197
01:18:47,222 --> 01:18:48,951
Well, I don't need you to.
1198
01:18:49,191 --> 01:18:50,522
Then, what do you need?
1199
01:18:51,360 --> 01:18:54,523
For you to stop running this house
like a military operation.
1200
01:18:56,131 --> 01:18:57,894
We're not a team, we're a family.
1201
01:18:59,134 --> 01:19:02,865
Sienna and I,
we're not your soldiers or cadets.
1202
01:19:04,273 --> 01:19:05,570
We're your kids.
1203
01:19:05,941 --> 01:19:09,378
No kid I know enjoys discipline.
I'm not gonna apologize for that.
1204
01:19:09,378 --> 01:19:10,970
I'm not talking about discipline.
1205
01:19:11,447 --> 01:19:12,744
I don't mind rules.
1206
01:19:13,382 --> 01:19:14,974
But you need to let me be
who I'm gonna be.
1207
01:19:15,350 --> 01:19:16,715
I think I do.
1208
01:19:17,152 --> 01:19:21,088
Except every time you look at me, all I see
is you wishing I were someone else.
1209
01:19:21,523 --> 01:19:22,854
Anyone else.
1210
01:19:24,159 --> 01:19:26,127
Nothing about me makes you proud.
1211
01:19:27,996 --> 01:19:29,395
How do you know that?
1212
01:19:31,066 --> 01:19:34,832
Because every time you look at Sienna, I see
exactly what that pride looks like.
1213
01:19:39,575 --> 01:19:41,634
Put this stuff away when you're done.
1214
01:20:19,414 --> 01:20:20,403
What?!
1215
01:20:21,049 --> 01:20:22,880
Have you talked to Chance?...
1216
01:20:23,218 --> 01:20:24,987
'cause he won't return our calls.
1217
01:20:24,987 --> 01:20:27,922
Yeah, we've gotta make sure he didn't kill
himself.
1218
01:20:30,192 --> 01:20:31,921
You're a photographer, right?
1219
01:20:32,294 --> 01:20:33,727
What gave it away?
1220
01:20:34,530 --> 01:20:35,827
Who are you?
1221
01:20:37,699 --> 01:20:39,564
We're scared of her.
1222
01:20:43,071 --> 01:20:45,039
Meet me here, after school today.
1223
01:20:45,707 --> 01:20:46,969
And bring that.
1224
01:20:49,344 --> 01:20:51,312
Can we stop following him now?
1225
01:20:51,947 --> 01:20:53,471
Okay, c'mon.
1226
01:21:11,833 --> 01:21:12,822
Hey guys!
1227
01:21:13,068 --> 01:21:14,236
What's this?
1228
01:21:14,236 --> 01:21:15,294
New band:
1229
01:21:15,504 --> 01:21:16,732
'Dramatic Pause.'
1230
01:21:17,172 --> 01:21:18,774
Chance is our lead singer.
1231
01:21:18,774 --> 01:21:20,207
Wow! That's neat.
1232
01:21:20,776 --> 01:21:22,835
We need some band photos -
for flyers and stuff.
1233
01:21:22,978 --> 01:21:23,912
Can you do it?
1234
01:21:23,912 --> 01:21:25,880
Yeah, sure I can.
1235
01:21:27,482 --> 01:21:29,518
We're competing at
the battle of the bands
1236
01:21:29,518 --> 01:21:30,485
and we require a manager.
1237
01:21:31,053 --> 01:21:32,179
Interested?
1238
01:21:32,287 --> 01:21:33,322
Manager?
1239
01:21:33,322 --> 01:21:35,722
You're a high-school band
doing Toto covers...
1240
01:21:35,924 --> 01:21:36,992
badly.
1241
01:21:36,992 --> 01:21:39,552
What you really need is to be
put out of your misery.
1242
01:21:46,902 --> 01:21:48,164
I'm in.
1243
01:21:48,670 --> 01:21:49,864
Cool.
1244
01:22:40,489 --> 01:22:41,490
Whoa...
1245
01:22:41,490 --> 01:22:44,050
This is a whole lot of people!
1246
01:22:46,528 --> 01:22:50,897
Hey! Listen, I arranged for some insurance
to make sure Dramatic Pause stands out.
1247
01:22:51,233 --> 01:22:52,501
You bought off the judges?!
1248
01:22:52,501 --> 01:22:53,468
Even better-
1249
01:22:53,669 --> 01:22:56,297
You... killed the judges?
1250
01:22:56,538 --> 01:22:59,098
Will you just shut up and listen?!
1251
01:23:17,592 --> 01:23:18,752
Where's Chance?
1252
01:23:19,561 --> 01:23:20,653
With you...
1253
01:23:21,663 --> 01:23:22,960
Weren't you picking him up?
1254
01:23:26,334 --> 01:23:29,497
So, what are we supposed to do
if Chance doesn't show?
1255
01:23:34,409 --> 01:23:35,467
Hi, Lawrence.
1256
01:23:35,877 --> 01:23:37,572
Do you know about that?
1257
01:23:39,948 --> 01:23:41,316
When did this happen?
1258
01:23:41,316 --> 01:23:43,443
It's been brewing
for the past two weeks, or so.
1259
01:23:43,952 --> 01:23:45,886
Levi and Chance wrote a song together.
1260
01:23:46,822 --> 01:23:47,880
Is it any good?
1261
01:23:48,457 --> 01:23:49,658
I haven't heard it yet.
1262
01:23:49,658 --> 01:23:52,027
Look, Levi's grounded,
and now he's gone.
1263
01:23:52,027 --> 01:23:54,359
And I'm willing to bet your son has
got something to do with that.
1264
01:23:54,963 --> 01:23:56,465
I wanna talk to him right now-
1265
01:23:56,465 --> 01:23:57,932
Chance isn't here.
1266
01:23:58,767 --> 01:24:00,291
His band goes on at five.
1267
01:24:00,535 --> 01:24:01,559
Can we go?
1268
01:24:04,473 --> 01:24:05,565
Get your coat.
1269
01:24:06,041 --> 01:24:07,838
But wait, I have to get changed first.
1270
01:24:11,847 --> 01:24:15,977
You know what someone should really invent?
Portable phones.
1271
01:24:17,853 --> 01:24:20,155
C'mon, let's go and see
if we can find him.
1272
01:24:20,155 --> 01:24:22,487
You go over there and you
check back there, okay?
1273
01:24:32,667 --> 01:24:33,634
Chance!
1274
01:24:34,269 --> 01:24:35,429
You guys, go look up there.
1275
01:24:36,438 --> 01:24:37,302
Chance?!
1276
01:24:46,515 --> 01:24:49,245
Maybe it's better if we split up.
1277
01:24:58,794 --> 01:24:59,954
Chance!
1278
01:25:00,195 --> 01:25:01,062
Where were you?
1279
01:25:01,062 --> 01:25:02,529
We were starting to think you bailed.
1280
01:25:03,131 --> 01:25:04,166
Oh look,
1281
01:25:04,166 --> 01:25:05,534
it's the Flock-of-Faggots.
1282
01:25:05,534 --> 01:25:07,331
What are you playing,
'Disco Up The Ass'?
1283
01:25:09,805 --> 01:25:11,602
Have you seen Levi anywhere?
1284
01:25:11,840 --> 01:25:13,102
I don't see either of them.
1285
01:25:18,480 --> 01:25:20,380
Is that Chance over there?
1286
01:25:46,608 --> 01:25:49,202
Look at them, they're spectacular!
1287
01:25:58,520 --> 01:26:00,121
What are you doing up here?
1288
01:26:00,121 --> 01:26:01,748
Nice introduction, your idea?
1289
01:26:03,458 --> 01:26:04,652
I can't go on...
1290
01:26:05,026 --> 01:26:05,927
Why?
1291
01:26:05,927 --> 01:26:06,689
What's wrong?
1292
01:26:07,495 --> 01:26:09,463
Stage fright is my best guess.
1293
01:26:09,965 --> 01:26:11,762
Or maybe an intestinal parasite.
1294
01:26:12,267 --> 01:26:13,427
Ladies...
1295
01:26:15,770 --> 01:26:18,238
Okay, you hormonal mess of a crowd,
1296
01:26:18,473 --> 01:26:20,373
are you ready for the next band?!
1297
01:26:25,113 --> 01:26:27,206
Please welcome my Rockettes!
1298
01:26:29,317 --> 01:26:31,285
What the hell is that?!
1299
01:26:31,887 --> 01:26:33,354
A chorus line, duh!
1300
01:26:33,722 --> 01:26:35,246
Aren't they fabulous?
1301
01:26:35,924 --> 01:26:38,449
I said, aren't they FABULOUS!
1302
01:26:43,765 --> 01:26:45,133
Listen to me.
1303
01:26:45,133 --> 01:26:47,702
If singing in a dress and high-heels
in front of two-hundred drunks
1304
01:26:47,702 --> 01:26:51,160
isn't going to prepare you for this,
then nothing ever will.
1305
01:26:51,406 --> 01:26:52,407
This is cake!
1306
01:26:52,407 --> 01:26:53,874
You don't understand...
1307
01:26:54,509 --> 01:26:56,534
pretending to be someone else is easy.
1308
01:26:56,978 --> 01:26:59,347
It's an act...dress-up.
1309
01:26:59,347 --> 01:27:00,916
I can hide behind top hats--
1310
01:27:00,916 --> 01:27:02,747
I thought you were done hiding.
1311
01:27:03,318 --> 01:27:05,343
Don't you want them
to see the real Chance?
1312
01:27:06,621 --> 01:27:08,452
Just go out there and sing.
1313
01:27:09,090 --> 01:27:10,057
Great advice.
1314
01:27:10,258 --> 01:27:12,694
And besides,
if they start throwing anything,
1315
01:27:12,694 --> 01:27:15,094
it'll be at Levi
and his lousy guitar playing.
1316
01:27:17,966 --> 01:27:19,524
Just stand up to all of 'em.
1317
01:27:20,035 --> 01:27:21,332
Now's your chance.
1318
01:27:22,070 --> 01:27:23,401
Stand up.
1319
01:27:26,708 --> 01:27:30,245
So, I want you all to put your hands
together for the next band.
1320
01:27:30,245 --> 01:27:33,114
It's led by a close, personal friend of mine.
1321
01:27:33,114 --> 01:27:35,050
And honeys, if you like good music,
1322
01:27:35,050 --> 01:27:37,746
you can turn on the radio after the concert.
1323
01:27:38,887 --> 01:27:42,914
In the meantime, here they are...
in all their Oxy-cream glory:
1324
01:27:43,491 --> 01:27:45,425
The Dramatic Pause!
1325
01:28:15,790 --> 01:28:19,361
I live in a different world
1326
01:28:19,361 --> 01:28:22,888
See things my own way
1327
01:28:23,598 --> 01:28:27,125
Got no shame for what I do
1328
01:28:27,535 --> 01:28:30,595
What else should I say
1329
01:28:31,473 --> 01:28:34,374
Who do we become
1330
01:28:35,610 --> 01:28:38,511
Add up all the sums
1331
01:28:39,481 --> 01:28:42,746
Part of me will be okay
1332
01:28:43,218 --> 01:28:46,210
The rest will be undone
1333
01:28:46,821 --> 01:28:49,024
Stand Up for all of your dreams
1334
01:28:49,024 --> 01:28:51,126
Leave the ones that have been
1335
01:28:51,126 --> 01:28:53,128
See how far we have come
1336
01:28:53,128 --> 01:28:55,263
Never have to succumb
1337
01:28:55,263 --> 01:28:57,465
Take your friends by your side
1338
01:28:57,465 --> 01:28:59,300
And just go for that ride
1339
01:28:59,300 --> 01:29:01,770
Don't worry who you are
1340
01:29:01,770 --> 01:29:04,102
Stand Up and you'll go far
1341
01:29:05,807 --> 01:29:08,605
Stand Up and you'll go far
1342
01:29:11,413 --> 01:29:14,678
Some people have all the luck
1343
01:29:15,450 --> 01:29:17,884
Born with looks and a buck
1344
01:29:19,287 --> 01:29:22,654
And then there is the rest of us
1345
01:29:23,158 --> 01:29:26,218
The strange and messed up
1346
01:29:27,362 --> 01:29:30,092
You think you are one
1347
01:29:30,965 --> 01:29:34,025
Boy you sure are dumb
1348
01:29:35,170 --> 01:29:38,606
Look at us and then decide
1349
01:29:39,140 --> 01:29:42,041
Who is Jekyll, who is Hyde?
1350
01:29:42,343 --> 01:29:44,712
Stand Up for all of your dreams
1351
01:29:44,712 --> 01:29:46,648
Leave the ones that have been
1352
01:29:46,648 --> 01:29:48,750
See how far you can go
1353
01:29:48,750 --> 01:29:50,479
Then get ready to blow--
1354
01:29:50,685 --> 01:29:52,277
Mr. Harden!
1355
01:29:53,421 --> 01:29:55,412
I want a word with you.
1356
01:30:00,762 --> 01:30:02,787
Care to explain?!
1357
01:30:07,869 --> 01:30:10,138
Stand Up for all of your dreams
1358
01:30:10,138 --> 01:30:12,173
Leave the ones that have been
1359
01:30:12,173 --> 01:30:14,109
See how far you can go
1360
01:30:14,109 --> 01:30:16,377
Then get ready to blow
1361
01:30:16,377 --> 01:30:18,213
Take the low-times in stride
1362
01:30:18,213 --> 01:30:20,248
Bring the high-times inside
1363
01:30:20,248 --> 01:30:22,917
Don't worry who you are
1364
01:30:22,917 --> 01:30:25,147
Stand Up and you'll go far
1365
01:30:26,654 --> 01:30:29,851
Stand Up and you'll go far
1366
01:30:30,692 --> 01:30:33,160
Stand Up and you'll go far
1367
01:30:34,662 --> 01:30:37,825
Stand Up and you'll go far
1368
01:30:38,700 --> 01:30:41,032
Stand Up and you'll go far
1369
01:30:42,637 --> 01:30:45,731
Stand Up and you'll go far
1370
01:31:17,739 --> 01:31:19,673
Why didn't you tell me you had a band?
1371
01:31:20,341 --> 01:31:22,605
I didn't think you were ready
for another singer in the family.
1372
01:31:25,113 --> 01:31:28,879
Well, maybe you should let me decide what
I may or may not be ready for.
1373
01:31:30,418 --> 01:31:32,511
But thanks for looking out for me.
1374
01:31:34,989 --> 01:31:36,251
I got your back.
1375
01:31:37,659 --> 01:31:39,957
I'm sorry, I haven't always had yours.
1376
01:31:42,063 --> 01:31:43,792
You were great out there today, Son.
1377
01:31:46,434 --> 01:31:48,493
You know,
they have bands in the Army...
1378
01:31:51,606 --> 01:31:52,664
Think about it.
1379
01:31:52,807 --> 01:31:53,831
Go.
1380
01:32:02,650 --> 01:32:03,918
Expelled?
1381
01:32:03,918 --> 01:32:05,977
As in, total expulsion?
1382
01:32:06,955 --> 01:32:10,558
And the best part is,
the idiot practically tumed himself in.
1383
01:32:10,558 --> 01:32:13,895
He started raging at a practice while
Smelt-her was watching...
1384
01:32:13,895 --> 01:32:15,863
so, she got suspicious.
1385
01:32:15,863 --> 01:32:17,262
Hey, Twyla...
1386
01:32:19,634 --> 01:32:22,470
Oh hey, don't forget about the gig
I booked you on Saturday night.
1387
01:32:22,470 --> 01:32:24,038
My cousin Claudia's wedding.
1388
01:32:24,038 --> 01:32:27,201
So start boning up
on your Barry Manilow.
1389
01:32:31,045 --> 01:32:33,275
Hey, I got concert photos for you.
1390
01:32:33,348 --> 01:32:34,372
Oh good!
1391
01:32:38,386 --> 01:32:39,648
Thank you.
1392
01:32:44,859 --> 01:32:46,224
Anything else?
1393
01:32:47,462 --> 01:32:49,430
You want to know what's inside?
1394
01:32:49,764 --> 01:32:50,958
Of course.
1395
01:32:51,299 --> 01:32:52,333
But you can't tell me.
1396
01:32:52,333 --> 01:32:53,334
To wit, Hank:
1397
01:32:53,334 --> 01:32:55,928
should I become privy, and Smelker finds out...
1398
01:32:56,304 --> 01:32:59,535
and finds some way to circumvent
standard administrative protocol
1399
01:32:59,707 --> 01:33:03,666
and torture me to the point where I have no
choice but to reveal what I know.
1400
01:33:05,079 --> 01:33:06,239
Torture...
1401
01:33:06,948 --> 01:33:08,176
Torture.
1402
01:33:09,684 --> 01:33:11,049
Good point.
1403
01:33:16,924 --> 01:33:18,949
I know you wanted to know...
1404
01:33:19,060 --> 01:33:22,655
but I think my well-being supersedes yourlow-minded curiosity in this case.
1405
01:34:04,772 --> 01:34:08,538
I know what you're thinking:another 'Chance-Fantasy-Sequence.'
1406
01:34:08,943 --> 01:34:10,843
Maybe...maybe not.
1407
01:34:11,145 --> 01:34:13,204
But, let's be clear about one thing,
1408
01:34:13,348 --> 01:34:15,509
this is my version of the story...
1409
01:34:26,427 --> 01:34:28,554
I told you, you were in for some perspective...
1410
01:34:29,430 --> 01:34:30,398
No doubt about it...
1411
01:34:30,398 --> 01:34:33,333
high school's mostly irritatingand an abomination.
1412
01:34:33,468 --> 01:34:35,561
But, you make the best of it...
100319
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