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Downloaded from
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Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX
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End of the line.
4
00:01:31,221 --> 00:01:32,701
Are you
the comedian?
5
00:01:32,744 --> 00:01:33,832
Guilty.
6
00:01:48,456 --> 00:01:50,501
And who might you be?
7
00:01:50,545 --> 00:01:53,243
Oh, uh, I'm Stephanie
from Ha Ha's.
8
00:01:53,287 --> 00:01:55,245
My uncle Phil sent me
to pick you up.
9
00:02:00,555 --> 00:02:03,775
I don't think
you're supposed to do that. - Do what?
10
00:02:03,819 --> 00:02:06,169
Have open liquor while driving!
11
00:02:06,213 --> 00:02:07,953
I'm not driving.
12
00:02:17,920 --> 00:02:20,966
- Here we are.
- What happened to the Holiday Inn?
13
00:02:21,010 --> 00:02:23,055
My uncle
got a better deal here.
14
00:02:24,840 --> 00:02:27,190
Just tell them
you're the comedian.
15
00:02:27,234 --> 00:02:30,062
The-- the show is at 8:00.
Should I pick you up at 7:00?
16
00:02:30,106 --> 00:02:33,762
- Fifty.
- It takes ten minutes to get there.
17
00:02:33,805 --> 00:02:35,067
Exactly.
18
00:02:36,634 --> 00:02:38,506
Are you ready
for your headliner?
19
00:02:38,549 --> 00:02:40,856
Awesome.
20
00:02:40,899 --> 00:02:43,902
Now, it's a real pleasure
for me to introduce this man.
21
00:02:43,946 --> 00:02:45,600
Real legend.
22
00:02:45,643 --> 00:02:47,558
Please welcome
the Road Dog himself:
23
00:02:47,602 --> 00:02:48,864
Jimmy Quinn!
24
00:02:52,650 --> 00:02:54,391
Hey, keep it going for, uh...
25
00:02:54,435 --> 00:02:57,829
a truly insignificant comedian
26
00:02:57,873 --> 00:03:00,005
whose name escapes me.
27
00:03:01,703 --> 00:03:04,009
My name is Jimmy,
and I'm an alcoholic.
28
00:03:06,360 --> 00:03:07,491
Wrong room?
29
00:03:31,036 --> 00:03:33,169
Go away!
30
00:03:33,213 --> 00:03:35,127
I don't need any towels.
31
00:03:39,219 --> 00:03:40,742
No moleste.
32
00:03:42,526 --> 00:03:43,875
I'm not the maid!
33
00:03:48,489 --> 00:03:49,968
God damn it.
34
00:03:59,848 --> 00:04:01,632
What the fuck do you want?
35
00:04:01,676 --> 00:04:03,547
Uh...
36
00:04:03,591 --> 00:04:04,853
I'm your son.
37
00:04:40,192 --> 00:04:41,281
One more time.
38
00:04:42,891 --> 00:04:44,545
I-- I'm your son, David.
39
00:04:48,505 --> 00:04:49,550
Fair enough.
40
00:04:50,812 --> 00:04:52,422
What can I do for you?
41
00:04:52,466 --> 00:04:55,033
Well, you know,
I-- I just want to meet you.
42
00:04:56,383 --> 00:04:57,601
All right.
43
00:04:59,299 --> 00:05:00,430
Can I take you to lunch?
44
00:05:02,040 --> 00:05:04,304
It's a little early for lunch.
45
00:05:05,348 --> 00:05:06,784
It's three in the afternoon.
46
00:05:08,090 --> 00:05:09,178
Ugh.
47
00:05:10,353 --> 00:05:12,660
All right.
Just give me a minute.
48
00:05:12,703 --> 00:05:14,966
Okay, yeah.
I'll just, uh, just...
49
00:05:16,141 --> 00:05:17,229
...wait out here.
50
00:05:26,500 --> 00:05:27,631
So, uh, you hungry?
51
00:05:31,635 --> 00:05:35,160
I'm not really a big eater.
52
00:05:35,204 --> 00:05:37,119
Right, yeah.
53
00:05:39,817 --> 00:05:41,776
I'm sorry, kid.
54
00:05:41,819 --> 00:05:45,649
You got to understand,
this is a lot to process.
55
00:05:45,693 --> 00:05:48,217
I'm sure I'm not
what you expected.
56
00:05:48,260 --> 00:05:50,915
Actually, you're exactly
what I expected.
57
00:05:50,959 --> 00:05:55,180
Uh, my mom was
very descriptive of you.
58
00:05:55,224 --> 00:05:57,879
Yeah? So how's she?
59
00:05:57,922 --> 00:05:59,837
She's good.
60
00:05:59,881 --> 00:06:02,187
Still married
to that plastic surgeon?
61
00:06:02,231 --> 00:06:04,581
Yeah. Almost 20 years.
62
00:06:04,625 --> 00:06:07,105
Well, good for her.
She deserves it.
63
00:06:08,585 --> 00:06:11,632
Even if she is
a giant sack of nag.
64
00:06:14,765 --> 00:06:19,683
Sorry. I shouldn't talk bad
about your mother like that, but...
65
00:06:19,727 --> 00:06:22,469
she and I
didn't really get along.
66
00:06:22,512 --> 00:06:25,341
Yeah, she doesn't have good
things to say about you either.
67
00:06:26,864 --> 00:06:29,389
Y'all ready to order?
68
00:06:29,432 --> 00:06:32,348
Yeah, I'll have the,
uh, club sandwich.
69
00:06:32,392 --> 00:06:34,742
All right. And yourself?
70
00:06:34,785 --> 00:06:36,483
Uh, the...
71
00:06:37,745 --> 00:06:40,617
"Breakfast-ival Plate"?
72
00:06:40,661 --> 00:06:44,795
I'm sorry, darlin', but we stop
serving breakfast at 11:00.
73
00:06:44,839 --> 00:06:49,147
Really? After you made me say
that?
74
00:06:49,191 --> 00:06:51,628
All right, I'll just have
whatever the kid's having.
75
00:06:51,672 --> 00:06:55,153
All right, two clubs.
Anything to drink? - Um, just water.
76
00:06:56,198 --> 00:06:57,808
Yeah, uh, do you serve beer?
77
00:06:57,852 --> 00:06:59,680
No, sir.
78
00:06:59,723 --> 00:07:01,377
Would you like water?
79
00:07:01,421 --> 00:07:04,598
Water. Yeah.
80
00:07:04,641 --> 00:07:08,428
- I'll give it a shot.
- All right. I'll be right back.
81
00:07:08,471 --> 00:07:12,040
It's a little early in
the morning to hear that voice.
82
00:07:19,743 --> 00:07:21,571
So...
83
00:07:21,615 --> 00:07:22,920
how'd you find me?
84
00:07:23,921 --> 00:07:27,229
I, like, looked you up online.
You know, the club had a website.
85
00:07:27,272 --> 00:07:30,450
I just went over there,
and they told me where you were.
86
00:07:31,668 --> 00:07:34,584
Again, I'm sorry, but...
87
00:07:34,628 --> 00:07:37,152
I don't know
the slightest thing about you.
88
00:07:37,195 --> 00:07:39,459
I haven't seen you
since you were a little kid.
89
00:07:39,502 --> 00:07:41,939
Yeah, I-- I have
no memory of you at all.
90
00:07:41,983 --> 00:07:44,594
That's exact--
that's what I'm saying. - Okay, well, okay.
91
00:07:44,638 --> 00:07:46,553
I didn't come here
to give you shit, okay?
92
00:07:46,596 --> 00:07:48,206
I really did just
want to meet you.
93
00:07:48,250 --> 00:07:49,991
And I was on my way to New York.
94
00:07:50,034 --> 00:07:51,688
You're on the way.
95
00:07:51,732 --> 00:07:52,820
So I thought, why not?
96
00:07:53,995 --> 00:07:56,432
New York? What's out there?
97
00:07:56,476 --> 00:07:58,782
Well, I actually
want to be a comedian.
98
00:08:00,654 --> 00:08:02,873
Yeah, I was going to crash
on a friend's couch
99
00:08:02,917 --> 00:08:04,179
until I find a place.
100
00:08:07,008 --> 00:08:10,011
Are you funny?
101
00:08:10,054 --> 00:08:12,448
I mean, I do open mics
for a couple of years,
102
00:08:12,492 --> 00:08:14,798
and I won
a contest at my school.
103
00:08:14,842 --> 00:08:17,584
Then you must be hilarious.
104
00:08:17,627 --> 00:08:19,150
Yeah, I was in medical school,
105
00:08:20,674 --> 00:08:22,502
until I dropped out last week.
106
00:08:22,545 --> 00:08:24,286
Why would you do that?
107
00:08:24,329 --> 00:08:26,070
Well, I told you.
I want to be comedian.
108
00:08:26,114 --> 00:08:28,769
Maybe it's genetic.
109
00:08:32,381 --> 00:08:34,949
I don't know.
What's your mother think about all this?
110
00:08:34,992 --> 00:08:38,822
As long as she doesn't know
I dropped out of school,
111
00:08:38,866 --> 00:08:39,910
we're good.
112
00:08:42,913 --> 00:08:45,873
- There you go.
- Ah, thank you.
113
00:08:45,916 --> 00:08:47,875
And I'm just gonna
leave this right here.
114
00:08:47,918 --> 00:08:49,790
Let me know
if you need anything else.
115
00:08:49,833 --> 00:08:51,487
All right, thanks.
116
00:08:51,531 --> 00:08:53,620
So you have any plans for today?
117
00:08:54,795 --> 00:08:58,799
Guess at some point I better
start working on my set.
118
00:08:58,842 --> 00:09:01,279
I was thinking maybe
I'd come see your show tonight,
119
00:09:01,323 --> 00:09:04,239
if that's okay. I got a spot
at the Holiday Inn. Um...
120
00:09:04,282 --> 00:09:07,155
Pick you up, say, before 8:00?
121
00:09:08,330 --> 00:09:09,897
Sure.
122
00:09:11,028 --> 00:09:13,030
All right, cool.
123
00:09:13,074 --> 00:09:15,206
No, I got this.
124
00:09:22,605 --> 00:09:26,000
...taught by years and pounds.
125
00:09:26,043 --> 00:09:27,436
Trade this thing in.
126
00:09:27,479 --> 00:09:29,569
I just...
127
00:09:30,918 --> 00:09:32,833
Your old man's
pretty funny, huh?
128
00:09:32,876 --> 00:09:34,399
Oh, yeah.
129
00:09:34,443 --> 00:09:36,793
I've been booking Jimmy
20 years now.
130
00:09:37,881 --> 00:09:41,102
I have seen 'em all,
and he is one of the best.
131
00:09:41,145 --> 00:09:42,625
Two women walked out of the show
132
00:09:42,669 --> 00:09:44,540
and complained to the manager
133
00:09:44,584 --> 00:09:47,412
that I was drunk on stage.
134
00:09:47,456 --> 00:09:48,979
I mean,
135
00:09:49,023 --> 00:09:51,286
I'm not driving a bus,
motherfucker.
136
00:09:51,329 --> 00:09:53,288
I'm a comedian.
137
00:09:53,331 --> 00:09:54,942
The jokes are coming out.
138
00:09:54,985 --> 00:09:57,640
I'm saying the same words
as if I was sober.
139
00:09:57,684 --> 00:09:59,816
Too bad the business
ain't what it used to be.
140
00:10:01,078 --> 00:10:02,166
Uh-huh.
141
00:10:04,908 --> 00:10:06,823
Never told me he had a kid.
142
00:10:10,131 --> 00:10:13,482
Folks, don't take any of this
stuff too seriously 'cause
143
00:10:13,525 --> 00:10:15,658
I don't know
if anyone ever told you,
144
00:10:15,702 --> 00:10:18,618
spoiler alert,
You die in the end.
145
00:10:18,661 --> 00:10:21,403
So, don't take any shit.
Have a great night.
146
00:10:27,017 --> 00:10:29,193
Thank you.
Jimmy Quinn, everybody.
147
00:10:29,237 --> 00:10:32,109
Hey, that was awesome!
Like, the way you worked the crowd.
148
00:10:32,153 --> 00:10:35,025
It wasn't even like you were
telling jokes, but still funny.
149
00:10:35,069 --> 00:10:36,810
Thanks, kid.
150
00:10:36,853 --> 00:10:38,725
Hey, uh, I want--
151
00:10:38,768 --> 00:10:40,901
I want to talk to you
about this little
152
00:10:40,944 --> 00:10:44,165
New York adventure
you're gonna do. - Yeah?
153
00:10:44,208 --> 00:10:46,907
What do you say we, uh,
spend a little bit more time together?
154
00:10:46,950 --> 00:10:48,648
Yeah, what do you mean?
155
00:10:48,691 --> 00:10:51,041
Well, I got a gig
coming up in South Bend,
156
00:10:51,085 --> 00:10:52,913
and I thought maybe
you'd tag along,
157
00:10:52,956 --> 00:10:56,133
show you the ropes,
maybe get you some stage time.
158
00:10:56,177 --> 00:11:00,094
Oh, man, well,
I don't have to be in New York at any specific time, so...
159
00:11:00,137 --> 00:11:02,749
All right, then it's on.
We'll have some goofs.
160
00:11:02,792 --> 00:11:04,925
I'll show you what
the road's really like.
161
00:11:04,968 --> 00:11:07,492
- Great. Yeah, that'll be fun.
- All right, hang out here.
162
00:11:07,536 --> 00:11:09,581
- I gotta get paid from Phil.
- All right, cool.
163
00:11:12,584 --> 00:11:14,586
You got a nice kid there.
164
00:11:14,630 --> 00:11:16,414
Yeah.
165
00:11:16,458 --> 00:11:18,460
Certainly thinks highly of you.
166
00:11:18,503 --> 00:11:20,984
Yeah. He doesn't know me
that well, Phil.
167
00:11:23,683 --> 00:11:25,206
How you feeling, Jimmy?
168
00:11:25,249 --> 00:11:27,948
I'm surviving.
169
00:11:27,991 --> 00:11:29,689
You-- you look
a little worn out.
170
00:11:30,777 --> 00:11:34,128
I'm a road comic. I am worn out.
171
00:11:34,171 --> 00:11:35,999
So what's the take?
172
00:11:36,043 --> 00:11:38,436
It's 500.
173
00:11:38,480 --> 00:11:40,482
Of course we have your bar tab,
174
00:11:40,525 --> 00:11:42,876
which I knocked down
to an even 100.
175
00:11:44,007 --> 00:11:47,576
And there's the 20
you borrowed from my niece.
176
00:11:47,619 --> 00:11:49,709
That brings it to 380.
177
00:11:49,752 --> 00:11:51,580
Geez.
178
00:11:51,623 --> 00:11:54,235
I made more as an opener
30 years ago.
179
00:11:54,278 --> 00:11:56,498
Listen, Jimmy, I...
180
00:11:56,541 --> 00:12:00,763
I'm afraid I...
can't give you any... more dates.
181
00:12:03,287 --> 00:12:04,985
We're closing
at the end of the month.
182
00:12:06,290 --> 00:12:08,379
- Closing?
- Yeah.
183
00:12:08,423 --> 00:12:11,339
Comedy's just not cutting it
any more and I...
184
00:12:11,382 --> 00:12:13,384
I got an offer on the place.
185
00:12:14,603 --> 00:12:17,954
They want to turn it
into a friggin' sports bar or something.
186
00:12:19,129 --> 00:12:20,652
I just couldn't say no.
187
00:12:23,090 --> 00:12:25,832
Well, another one
bites the dust.
188
00:12:28,051 --> 00:12:31,141
I don't know what to say,
but, you know,
189
00:12:31,185 --> 00:12:33,317
thanks for all the years, Phil.
190
00:12:33,361 --> 00:12:35,537
And listen, Jimmy,
191
00:12:35,580 --> 00:12:37,539
you take care of yourself, huh?
192
00:12:37,582 --> 00:12:39,541
- I'll try.
- Okay.
193
00:12:46,330 --> 00:12:47,897
All right, off to South Bend?
194
00:12:47,941 --> 00:12:50,204
Let's do it.
195
00:13:20,060 --> 00:13:21,452
I had a thought.
196
00:13:23,890 --> 00:13:26,718
Know where we can
score any ketamine?
197
00:13:26,762 --> 00:13:29,069
What?
198
00:13:29,112 --> 00:13:31,332
I'm just fucking with you.
199
00:13:31,375 --> 00:13:33,943
No, I was thinking, uh,
200
00:13:33,987 --> 00:13:37,381
we have a few days
before South Bend, do you...
201
00:13:37,425 --> 00:13:40,515
- want to take a little detour?
- Yeah, where?
202
00:13:40,558 --> 00:13:44,214
I want to show you the first
place I ever did stand-up.
203
00:13:44,258 --> 00:13:45,912
It's just outside of Chicago.
204
00:13:45,955 --> 00:13:49,132
Uh,
I can chuck you some gas money.
205
00:13:49,176 --> 00:13:51,439
Maybe get a motel for us.
206
00:13:51,482 --> 00:13:55,225
Oh, you're fine.
I got my mom's credit cards.
207
00:13:55,269 --> 00:13:57,924
Fuck it, then.
We'll get the penthouse suite.
208
00:14:19,510 --> 00:14:21,730
Oh, you're starting early, huh?
209
00:14:21,773 --> 00:14:23,471
It's my day off.
210
00:14:31,871 --> 00:14:34,003
Sure beats the hell
out of the bus.
211
00:14:35,091 --> 00:14:36,440
Yeah, I bet.
212
00:14:38,965 --> 00:14:42,142
You know, I was wondering,
uh, how come you never made it on TV?
213
00:14:42,185 --> 00:14:46,711
You know, like, I think
you're way funnier than a lot of those guys that made it big.
214
00:14:46,755 --> 00:14:50,759
That shit you see on TV
isn't real comedy.
215
00:14:50,802 --> 00:14:54,197
Real comedy's live.
You know, in the moment.
216
00:14:54,241 --> 00:14:55,720
If shit goes wrong,
217
00:14:55,764 --> 00:14:57,853
people yell shit out,
you roll with it.
218
00:14:59,594 --> 00:15:01,509
Anything can happen.
219
00:15:01,552 --> 00:15:05,730
Stuff you see on TV
is all pre-scripted.
220
00:15:05,774 --> 00:15:08,820
You have to do it
the way they want you to do it.
221
00:15:08,864 --> 00:15:11,127
Yeah, but you know,
you're still doing your act
222
00:15:11,171 --> 00:15:13,173
and you can be seen
by more people.
223
00:15:13,216 --> 00:15:16,959
That's gotta help with, you
know, bookings and money, right?
224
00:15:17,003 --> 00:15:19,919
You want money,
you stay in med school.
225
00:15:19,962 --> 00:15:22,573
You don't get into comedy
for money.
226
00:15:22,617 --> 00:15:25,837
And if you really
want to do this, you have to make a decision.
227
00:15:25,881 --> 00:15:30,190
Do you-- do you want to be some
shiny game show host comic on TV,
228
00:15:30,233 --> 00:15:34,977
or do you want to be a real
legitimate, great stand-up?
229
00:15:35,021 --> 00:15:37,632
There's guys on TV
who are funny.
230
00:15:37,675 --> 00:15:39,329
Name two.
231
00:15:39,373 --> 00:15:41,114
Listen,
232
00:15:41,157 --> 00:15:45,509
I haven't had a day job
in over 30 years.
233
00:15:45,553 --> 00:15:47,685
I go on that stage,
I'm the talent,
234
00:15:47,729 --> 00:15:50,427
I'm the writer,
I'm the director.
235
00:15:50,471 --> 00:15:54,605
I go up, I work an hour a night
with a cocktail in my hand.
236
00:15:54,649 --> 00:15:56,651
And if the customer
doesn't like it,
237
00:15:56,694 --> 00:15:59,915
I tell the customer
to go fuck himself.
238
00:15:59,959 --> 00:16:01,612
Top that for a living.
239
00:16:04,354 --> 00:16:05,442
Yeah.
240
00:16:36,952 --> 00:16:38,998
This is where you started?
241
00:16:39,041 --> 00:16:41,957
That's where--
where it used to be.
242
00:16:43,132 --> 00:16:46,309
It was a little hole in the wall
called The Purple Fox.
243
00:16:46,353 --> 00:16:48,572
It wasn't much, but, uh...
244
00:16:48,616 --> 00:16:51,097
basically where my life
got started.
245
00:16:51,140 --> 00:16:54,752
Well, how'd you start here?
I thought you grew up in Boston.
246
00:16:54,796 --> 00:16:59,105
I left early.
I left when I was 17, joined the Navy.
247
00:16:59,148 --> 00:17:02,282
Came out here for boot camp.
Lasted for about six weeks,
248
00:17:02,325 --> 00:17:05,589
and they had enough of me,
so then I just bummed around.
249
00:17:05,633 --> 00:17:08,853
Got a job here as a fry cook
at The Fox, and...
250
00:17:08,897 --> 00:17:10,681
we started doing stand-up.
251
00:17:10,725 --> 00:17:13,293
Comedy night turned into
five nights a week
252
00:17:13,336 --> 00:17:16,905
and I'd just sit in the back
stoned and watch comics going,
253
00:17:16,948 --> 00:17:18,428
"I could do this shit."
254
00:17:19,516 --> 00:17:20,865
What was your first time like?
255
00:17:22,867 --> 00:17:26,915
First night was, uh,
it was Labor Day weekend, so the place is packed.
256
00:17:26,958 --> 00:17:28,482
And I was terrified.
257
00:17:28,525 --> 00:17:31,572
I just hammered shots
to loosen up.
258
00:17:31,615 --> 00:17:33,791
And I went on stage.
259
00:17:33,835 --> 00:17:36,142
And I had nothing.
And I was dying.
260
00:17:36,185 --> 00:17:38,622
And I made the classic mistake
that comics make.
261
00:17:38,666 --> 00:17:42,017
And I asked the audience,
"Hey, what do you guys wanna talk about?"
262
00:17:42,061 --> 00:17:45,151
And some beautiful asshole
in the back yells out,
263
00:17:45,194 --> 00:17:47,414
"Talk about sex!"
264
00:17:47,457 --> 00:17:49,894
And I said the first thing
that went through my head,
265
00:17:49,938 --> 00:17:52,462
I said, "Your parents
shouldn't have had any!"
266
00:17:52,506 --> 00:17:55,813
It wasn't genius, but it killed.
267
00:17:55,857 --> 00:17:57,728
So after that I was hooked.
268
00:18:00,862 --> 00:18:03,299
There ought to be a plaque here.
269
00:18:03,343 --> 00:18:05,649
A lot of funny comics
started here.
270
00:18:05,693 --> 00:18:06,781
Like who?
271
00:18:08,435 --> 00:18:10,176
Uh, Emo Philips.
272
00:18:10,219 --> 00:18:12,700
Uh, Larry Reeb.
273
00:18:12,743 --> 00:18:14,702
Paul Kelly.
274
00:18:14,745 --> 00:18:15,964
Will Richards.
275
00:18:16,007 --> 00:18:17,357
Will Richards?
276
00:18:17,400 --> 00:18:18,836
He started here?
277
00:18:18,880 --> 00:18:21,622
Yeah, he was my opening act.
278
00:18:21,665 --> 00:18:23,014
I give him his start.
279
00:18:23,058 --> 00:18:24,146
Really?
280
00:18:26,235 --> 00:18:27,889
Yeah, really.
281
00:18:32,285 --> 00:18:34,461
There's an open mic
in the city tonight
282
00:18:34,504 --> 00:18:36,158
I'm gonna go perform at.
283
00:18:36,202 --> 00:18:39,030
You wanna come with?
Maybe even do a set?
284
00:18:40,162 --> 00:18:43,034
Nah,
I'm just gonna sprawl out here
285
00:18:43,078 --> 00:18:45,515
and work on some material,
maybe.
286
00:18:45,559 --> 00:18:47,604
But you go ahead.
287
00:18:51,130 --> 00:18:52,348
All right.
288
00:18:57,527 --> 00:18:59,442
Well, let me know
if you change your mind.
289
00:18:59,486 --> 00:19:01,618
I can come back and get you.
Just give me a call.
290
00:19:02,967 --> 00:19:06,101
I got everything
I need right here, but...
291
00:19:06,145 --> 00:19:07,189
have fun.
292
00:19:08,756 --> 00:19:09,844
Okay.
293
00:20:13,124 --> 00:20:14,822
You're a fucking idiot.
294
00:20:19,653 --> 00:20:21,742
Um, room 249.
295
00:20:21,785 --> 00:20:26,050
Right, that was a--
a non-smoking room?
296
00:20:27,574 --> 00:20:31,491
Uh, yeah.
You might find there's a little problem with the mirror.
297
00:20:31,534 --> 00:20:33,841
Oh, I'm sorry.
298
00:20:33,884 --> 00:20:36,017
What was the problem?
299
00:20:36,060 --> 00:20:37,627
Uh, just like
a slight crack in it.
300
00:20:37,671 --> 00:20:38,976
Uh-huh.
301
00:20:39,020 --> 00:20:41,457
Um, how did that happen?
302
00:20:42,850 --> 00:20:44,852
I just look terrible
in the morning.
303
00:20:44,895 --> 00:20:47,420
I-- I doubt that.
304
00:20:48,856 --> 00:20:50,553
So is, uh...
305
00:20:50,597 --> 00:20:52,120
is that gonna cost
a lot of money,
306
00:20:52,163 --> 00:20:53,208
Heather?
307
00:20:54,775 --> 00:20:58,257
I am sure it was like that
when you checked in.
308
00:20:58,300 --> 00:20:59,954
Yeah.
309
00:20:59,997 --> 00:21:02,304
You are all set. Um...
310
00:21:02,348 --> 00:21:04,785
please come back
and see us soon.
311
00:21:04,828 --> 00:21:06,569
Thanks. I hope to.
312
00:21:08,267 --> 00:21:09,877
Nicely done.
313
00:21:14,403 --> 00:21:17,101
So I, uh, got up
at that open mic last night.
314
00:21:17,145 --> 00:21:20,931
- Fantastic.
- Yeah, I wish you could've been there.
315
00:21:20,975 --> 00:21:23,499
So, uh, who was that
with you in that picture?
316
00:21:26,328 --> 00:21:30,201
Oh, that was just, uh,
just a girl.
317
00:21:30,245 --> 00:21:32,682
Nosy feller, aren't ya?
318
00:21:32,726 --> 00:21:36,773
Well, you guys
look really happy. Was it, you know, serious?
319
00:21:36,817 --> 00:21:38,906
Define "happy."
320
00:21:38,949 --> 00:21:41,430
But, uh, that was
a long time ago.
321
00:21:42,431 --> 00:21:46,348
Well... ...you don't
wanna talk about the picture. That's-- that's fine.
322
00:21:46,392 --> 00:21:48,437
Did it have anything to do
with the broken mirror?
323
00:21:51,788 --> 00:21:53,573
- Shit.
- Who is it?
324
00:21:53,616 --> 00:21:54,878
It's Mom.
325
00:21:54,922 --> 00:21:56,184
Ugh!
326
00:21:58,708 --> 00:22:00,231
Hey, Mom.
327
00:22:00,275 --> 00:22:02,146
Good!
328
00:22:02,190 --> 00:22:04,366
Yeah, here just studying.
329
00:22:04,410 --> 00:22:05,628
Where?
330
00:22:05,672 --> 00:22:07,500
Uh, in my dorm room, you know?
331
00:22:07,543 --> 00:22:09,806
- Where else would I be?
- Oh, yeah? Really?
332
00:22:09,850 --> 00:22:11,678
Because I just left
your dorm room,
333
00:22:11,721 --> 00:22:13,810
and unless you're nappingin the mini fridge,
334
00:22:13,854 --> 00:22:16,247
I didn't see you.As a matter of fact,
335
00:22:16,291 --> 00:22:19,860
your roommate, Rajesh told meyou dropped out of school.
336
00:22:19,903 --> 00:22:22,079
Do you mind telling mewhere you are?
337
00:22:22,123 --> 00:22:24,081
And just what the hellis going on?
338
00:22:25,648 --> 00:22:28,564
Uh, well, you know what?
339
00:22:28,608 --> 00:22:31,350
Yeah. Yeah, I did drop out
of school to become a comedian.
340
00:22:31,393 --> 00:22:34,265
And, in fact, I'm here right now
341
00:22:34,309 --> 00:22:35,789
with someone you may know.
342
00:22:37,138 --> 00:22:41,534
- Your ex, my dad, Jimmy.
- What?
343
00:22:41,577 --> 00:22:44,798
In fact, we're right--
right now we're on our way to South Bend
344
00:22:44,841 --> 00:22:46,582
where Jimmy's
performing tonight.
345
00:22:46,626 --> 00:22:49,193
Put him on the phone
this second!
346
00:22:50,673 --> 00:22:53,676
Um, she's really excited
to talk to you.
347
00:22:53,720 --> 00:22:54,938
Oh, joy.
348
00:23:00,727 --> 00:23:03,294
Hello, Denise. How you been?
349
00:23:03,338 --> 00:23:05,296
I don't know what you
think you're doing,
350
00:23:05,340 --> 00:23:07,864
but you send him back
this instant.
351
00:23:07,908 --> 00:23:10,171
Hey, I-- I had nothing
to do with this.
352
00:23:10,214 --> 00:23:12,478
- He showed up at my door--
- Shut up!
353
00:23:12,521 --> 00:23:14,958
Do you honestly think I'm gonnalet you drag him down
354
00:23:15,002 --> 00:23:16,873
into the gutterand be a loser like you
355
00:23:16,917 --> 00:23:18,397
for the rest of his life?
356
00:23:19,441 --> 00:23:21,878
He's a big boy, Denise.
He can make his own decision.
357
00:23:21,922 --> 00:23:24,315
I should've known you had
something to do with this!
358
00:23:24,359 --> 00:23:27,928
You bring nothingbut destructionto everything you touch!
359
00:23:27,971 --> 00:23:30,191
Well, you're notgonna ruin his life
360
00:23:30,234 --> 00:23:32,889
any more than you already have.
361
00:23:32,933 --> 00:23:35,370
All right, Denise, it was
a pleasure talking to you.
362
00:23:35,414 --> 00:23:37,459
I'm gonna turn you
back over to David now.
363
00:23:37,503 --> 00:23:39,809
But we should--
we should talk again real soon.
364
00:23:39,853 --> 00:23:41,028
Bye-bye now.
365
00:23:43,117 --> 00:23:44,901
Hey, Mom?
366
00:23:44,945 --> 00:23:48,557
Mom, yeah.
Yeah-- 'Kay-- Calm down, Mom.
367
00:23:48,601 --> 00:23:51,865
You know I wanna do this, okay?
You know I wanna be a comedian.
368
00:23:51,908 --> 00:23:54,171
And I wanna spend some time
with Jimmy. You know,
369
00:23:54,215 --> 00:23:56,130
- just learn from him.
- Learn from him?
370
00:23:56,173 --> 00:23:59,786
Mom, come on! You know-- you
know I wanna do this. Come on.
371
00:23:59,829 --> 00:24:02,092
Let me tell you something
about this man.
372
00:24:02,136 --> 00:24:04,007
I know him.
373
00:24:04,051 --> 00:24:06,357
You don't.
374
00:24:06,401 --> 00:24:09,012
He only cares about himself.
375
00:24:09,056 --> 00:24:11,580
If you get close to him,you're going to wind up hurt--
376
00:24:11,624 --> 00:24:14,888
Okay, Mom?
I'm gonna call you back when you get a chance to calm down.
377
00:24:14,931 --> 00:24:17,238
But you gotta understand,
I'm gonna be a comedian.
378
00:24:17,281 --> 00:24:20,023
This is what I'm doing. There's
nothing you can do about it.
379
00:24:20,067 --> 00:24:22,417
Okay? I love you. Bye.
380
00:24:24,898 --> 00:24:26,943
Okay, well, uh...
381
00:24:26,987 --> 00:24:28,379
I think that went well.
382
00:24:29,468 --> 00:24:31,731
"And there's nothing
you can do about it!"
383
00:24:31,774 --> 00:24:34,168
That was a power move.
384
00:24:34,211 --> 00:24:36,562
Yeah, and she'll
come around, you know.
385
00:24:37,650 --> 00:24:40,304
You know, I never found out
how you two met.
386
00:24:40,348 --> 00:24:43,046
Oh, your mother.
Yeah, she, uh...
387
00:24:43,090 --> 00:24:46,136
she used to work out of
a brothel on the South Side.
388
00:24:46,180 --> 00:24:47,921
Mostly like, fetish stuff.
389
00:24:47,964 --> 00:24:50,837
She was, you know,
S&M, water sports,
390
00:24:50,880 --> 00:24:52,316
ass play.
391
00:24:52,360 --> 00:24:54,754
Yeah, discount.
392
00:24:54,797 --> 00:24:56,625
I'm fucking with you.
393
00:24:56,669 --> 00:24:59,802
She was a-- she was a waitress
at a comedy club.
394
00:24:59,846 --> 00:25:01,195
Mom was a waitress?
395
00:25:01,238 --> 00:25:02,805
- Really?
- She never told you that?
396
00:25:02,849 --> 00:25:06,026
No. I mean, she's married
to a surgeon, so...
397
00:25:06,069 --> 00:25:08,158
She was a waitress
and we'd hook up
398
00:25:08,202 --> 00:25:11,031
when I came to town
and fool around.
399
00:25:11,074 --> 00:25:14,425
And long story short, one day
she called me up and, uh,
400
00:25:14,469 --> 00:25:17,777
said she was in
the "family way," as she put it.
401
00:25:17,820 --> 00:25:22,303
And, uh,
so I just jumped the gun and married her.
402
00:25:22,346 --> 00:25:25,698
Probably mostly
for the story value, but, uh,
403
00:25:25,741 --> 00:25:27,090
it didn't work out.
404
00:25:27,134 --> 00:25:28,309
She, uh...
405
00:25:30,398 --> 00:25:31,704
gave it a shot.
406
00:25:31,747 --> 00:25:33,314
How long were you guys together?
407
00:25:33,357 --> 00:25:35,229
A while. Like...
408
00:25:35,272 --> 00:25:37,100
two, three months.
409
00:25:38,232 --> 00:25:40,800
She got tired of my shit
pretty quick and, uh,
410
00:25:40,843 --> 00:25:42,192
told me to beat feet.
411
00:25:43,716 --> 00:25:45,718
That's all right. We weren't--
412
00:25:45,761 --> 00:25:49,025
we didn't really see
eye to eye on a lot of stuff.
413
00:25:49,069 --> 00:25:53,334
And honestly, monogamy was
never really my strong suit,
414
00:25:53,377 --> 00:25:55,815
and chicks tend to frown
on that.
415
00:25:55,858 --> 00:25:57,773
Yeah.
416
00:25:57,817 --> 00:26:00,123
I'm still trying to picture
Mom as a waitress.
417
00:26:00,167 --> 00:26:02,865
I'm sorry.
The card was declined.
418
00:26:02,909 --> 00:26:04,563
Oh, it must be a mistake.
419
00:26:04,606 --> 00:26:06,129
Can you run it again?
420
00:26:06,173 --> 00:26:08,610
I already
tried it twice.
421
00:26:08,654 --> 00:26:12,092
I guess there was something
your mother could do about it.
422
00:26:13,136 --> 00:26:15,182
We'll be paying cash.
423
00:26:22,058 --> 00:26:23,799
- Boo!
- Oh!
424
00:26:23,843 --> 00:26:27,411
There he is,
the Road Dog himself.
425
00:26:27,455 --> 00:26:29,718
- How you doing, Jay?
- Hanging in there.
426
00:26:29,762 --> 00:26:31,372
Things ain't what
they used to be.
427
00:26:31,415 --> 00:26:33,635
Hey, this, uh, this is David.
428
00:26:33,679 --> 00:26:36,072
This is, uh... my boy.
429
00:26:36,116 --> 00:26:38,161
I'm his father,
if you can believe that.
430
00:26:38,205 --> 00:26:39,946
In sperm only.
431
00:26:39,989 --> 00:26:43,079
Get outta here.
Well, wonders never cease.
432
00:26:43,123 --> 00:26:45,778
- Good to meet you, kid.
- Nice to meet you, man.
433
00:26:45,821 --> 00:26:47,910
Jimmy!
434
00:26:47,954 --> 00:26:51,131
Holy shit. Mikey,
what are you doing here? - How you doing?
435
00:26:51,174 --> 00:26:54,438
Oh, my God.
Are you on the show? - I'm MCing.
436
00:26:54,482 --> 00:26:57,267
I heard you were coming to town.
I forced Jay to put me on it.
437
00:26:57,311 --> 00:26:59,182
- Fantastic.
- Yeah.
438
00:26:59,226 --> 00:27:02,621
God, it's... what, 17 years?
439
00:27:02,664 --> 00:27:05,232
- Yeah, 17 years.
- How you doing?
440
00:27:05,275 --> 00:27:09,802
You know, I'm, uh,
I'm-- I'm still here.
441
00:27:09,845 --> 00:27:12,369
- A lot of guys can't say that.
- That's true.
442
00:27:12,413 --> 00:27:15,285
Uh, this is David.
This is my son.
443
00:27:15,329 --> 00:27:17,026
David?
444
00:27:17,070 --> 00:27:19,725
No, the kid from the waitress?
445
00:27:19,768 --> 00:27:21,901
No. He's too old!
446
00:27:21,944 --> 00:27:23,685
Time flies. That's him.
447
00:27:23,729 --> 00:27:26,035
Whoa! Nice to meet you.
448
00:27:26,079 --> 00:27:28,168
- How you doing?
- Nice to meet you, man.
449
00:27:28,211 --> 00:27:30,692
Me and your dad, we go way back.
450
00:27:30,736 --> 00:27:33,434
- Let's catch up later.
- Yeah.
451
00:27:33,477 --> 00:27:36,742
Yeah. Let me, uh--
let me get your intro. What do you want me to say?
452
00:27:36,785 --> 00:27:38,265
I got your intro.
453
00:27:41,442 --> 00:27:43,879
Yeah, he's funny, huh?
454
00:27:43,923 --> 00:27:45,881
Yeah. Just wait.
455
00:27:45,925 --> 00:27:48,231
Uh, so I'm dating
this girl named Wendy.
456
00:27:48,275 --> 00:27:51,321
And I'm trying to slip her
the Whopper, and she's like,
457
00:27:52,279 --> 00:27:53,846
"Where's the beef?"
458
00:27:55,195 --> 00:27:56,544
"Where's the beef?"
459
00:27:58,589 --> 00:28:00,983
Remember? Uh, by the way,
460
00:28:01,027 --> 00:28:03,943
I'll be selling these
after the show: $15.
461
00:28:03,986 --> 00:28:05,640
Uh, only got a few left.
462
00:28:07,033 --> 00:28:08,556
You ready for your headliner?
463
00:28:08,599 --> 00:28:10,166
All right,
464
00:28:10,210 --> 00:28:11,864
let's get some energy
going here.
465
00:28:11,907 --> 00:28:13,648
This next guy
coming on the stage,
466
00:28:13,692 --> 00:28:16,390
you're all here to see him.
He's The Road Dog.
467
00:28:16,433 --> 00:28:18,348
He's been doing it
for over 30 years.
468
00:28:18,392 --> 00:28:21,395
Killing!
Please welcome my good friend,
469
00:28:21,438 --> 00:28:22,788
Jimmy Quinn!
470
00:28:28,619 --> 00:28:30,317
Keep it going for Mikey, people!
471
00:28:30,360 --> 00:28:32,319
Come on!
472
00:28:32,362 --> 00:28:33,886
Give it up!
473
00:28:33,929 --> 00:28:36,018
He should.
474
00:28:36,062 --> 00:28:38,020
I've been
busting my balls, Jimmy.
475
00:28:38,064 --> 00:28:41,894
Single-handedly keeping
"where's the beef?" jokes alive
476
00:28:41,937 --> 00:28:44,723
into the new millennium.
477
00:28:44,766 --> 00:28:47,508
Your act has fallen
and it can't get up.
478
00:28:49,728 --> 00:28:52,513
Anyway, my name is Jimmy,
and I'm an alcoholic.
479
00:28:52,556 --> 00:28:54,254
Jimmy, you're still the best.
480
00:28:54,297 --> 00:28:55,908
- Aw, thanks, Mikey.
- Yeah.
481
00:28:55,951 --> 00:28:57,953
You staying at the, uh, condo?
482
00:28:57,997 --> 00:29:01,522
- No, no. I, uh, I live here now.
- Oh.
483
00:29:01,565 --> 00:29:03,698
So-- But I'll swing by,
we can shoot the shit.
484
00:29:03,742 --> 00:29:06,396
Sounds great.
See you over there. - Okay. See you over there.
485
00:29:06,440 --> 00:29:07,833
See ya, man.
486
00:29:07,876 --> 00:29:10,618
- Good show.
- Yeah.
487
00:29:10,661 --> 00:29:13,447
Hey, Jimmy, don't forget
about the church show tomorrow.
488
00:29:13,490 --> 00:29:15,971
- What?
- Oh, come on. We talked about this.
489
00:29:16,015 --> 00:29:17,494
I got you a church gig tomorrow.
490
00:29:17,538 --> 00:29:18,974
It's an extra 250.
491
00:29:19,018 --> 00:29:20,454
You just got to keep it clean.
492
00:29:21,455 --> 00:29:24,632
I didn't agree
to any church show. - What are you talking about?
493
00:29:24,675 --> 00:29:27,156
On the phone last week,
you said you were fine with it.
494
00:29:27,200 --> 00:29:29,898
I have zero recollection
of that conversation.
495
00:29:29,942 --> 00:29:32,379
Look,
you only gotta do 20 minutes.
496
00:29:32,422 --> 00:29:34,294
You get in, you get out.
497
00:29:34,337 --> 00:29:36,905
See Pastor Bennett when you're
done. He'll pay you after.
498
00:29:36,949 --> 00:29:39,255
Keep it clean. Good show.
499
00:29:43,738 --> 00:29:46,045
You remember
Hot Springs, Arkansas?
500
00:29:46,088 --> 00:29:47,829
No, not really.
501
00:29:47,873 --> 00:29:49,962
Yeah. Yeah, you do.
502
00:29:50,005 --> 00:29:51,267
It was a convention.
503
00:29:51,311 --> 00:29:53,139
It was like Avon or Mary Kay.
504
00:29:53,182 --> 00:29:55,576
It was a bunch of
overly made-up housewives
505
00:29:55,619 --> 00:29:57,317
without their husbands.
506
00:29:57,360 --> 00:29:59,232
Shit shows, but...
507
00:29:59,275 --> 00:30:01,538
I got laid every night
that week.
508
00:30:01,582 --> 00:30:03,758
Those were the days, man.
509
00:30:03,802 --> 00:30:05,151
Those were the days.
510
00:30:08,197 --> 00:30:10,765
Remember Joey Simpson?
511
00:30:10,809 --> 00:30:12,462
Was that the dude
with the balloons?
512
00:30:12,506 --> 00:30:14,247
Right, right.
That's the guy. Dead.
513
00:30:14,290 --> 00:30:15,639
- Really?
- Cancer.
514
00:30:17,163 --> 00:30:20,340
You know who else died is,
uh, Fat Mike.
515
00:30:20,383 --> 00:30:22,646
- Oh, shit.
- Suicide.
516
00:30:22,690 --> 00:30:24,083
Yeah.
517
00:30:24,126 --> 00:30:25,258
Ricky Conner.
518
00:30:25,301 --> 00:30:27,216
Diane Alaimo.
519
00:30:27,260 --> 00:30:29,871
- Bob Thomas.
- Bob Thomas.
520
00:30:31,090 --> 00:30:32,787
- Jimmy Higgins.
- Jimmy Higgins.
521
00:30:32,831 --> 00:30:34,876
- Yeah.
- They're just gone.
522
00:30:34,920 --> 00:30:37,009
They're just all gone.
523
00:30:37,052 --> 00:30:40,099
- God.
- There's some food in the fridge that comic left.
524
00:30:40,142 --> 00:30:42,666
- Did you guys want so--
- No, no, no, no, no.
525
00:30:42,710 --> 00:30:46,279
That's the first, uh, rule of the comedy condo,
526
00:30:46,322 --> 00:30:49,673
is you don't touch anything
that comics left behind.
527
00:30:50,892 --> 00:30:52,633
They tend to get creative.
528
00:30:52,676 --> 00:30:54,896
Especially with the mayonnaise.
529
00:30:54,940 --> 00:30:57,681
I remember being
in this condo in the nineties.
530
00:30:57,725 --> 00:31:00,510
I don't think they've
changed a single thing.
531
00:31:00,554 --> 00:31:02,861
Man, if these walls
could talk, Jimmy?
532
00:31:03,992 --> 00:31:05,646
If these walls could talk,
533
00:31:05,689 --> 00:31:07,474
they'd be testifying
in court a lot.
534
00:31:10,781 --> 00:31:13,784
Your dad was the best
to do hell gigs with.
535
00:31:13,828 --> 00:31:15,786
He would rip the crowd apart.
536
00:31:15,830 --> 00:31:17,440
Fearless.
537
00:31:17,484 --> 00:31:21,096
I remember this one time
in, uh, Andover, Mass.
538
00:31:21,140 --> 00:31:22,619
Remember Andover, Mass?
539
00:31:22,663 --> 00:31:24,621
- What happened there?
- Classic.
540
00:31:24,665 --> 00:31:27,886
Your dad's on stage
tripping balls on ecstasy,
541
00:31:27,929 --> 00:31:30,584
and he's talking about it.
And this chick stands up
542
00:31:30,627 --> 00:31:36,068
and she goes, "That's not funny!
My sister died on ecstasy."
543
00:31:36,111 --> 00:31:38,940
Whole crowd goes chill.
Nobody says anything.
544
00:31:38,984 --> 00:31:41,116
And then without missing a beat,
your dad goes,
545
00:31:41,160 --> 00:31:44,337
"Oh, then she must be
as horny as I am right now.
546
00:31:44,380 --> 00:31:45,904
Let's dig her up and fuck her!"
547
00:31:45,947 --> 00:31:47,427
Jesus! You said that?
548
00:31:47,470 --> 00:31:50,299
Oh, no. That was The Early Show.
549
00:31:50,343 --> 00:31:53,389
The Late Show,
now, I'm on stage,
550
00:31:53,433 --> 00:31:55,565
and the chick's husband--
Remember this? - Yeah.
551
00:31:55,609 --> 00:31:59,439
The husband walks up on stage
and slaps me across the face.
552
00:31:59,482 --> 00:32:04,052
He hits the wrong guy.
He goes, "You don't talk about my wife's sister!"
553
00:32:04,096 --> 00:32:07,447
But you know what?
I was proud to take a punch for your dad.
554
00:32:07,490 --> 00:32:08,883
That's funny, man.
555
00:32:08,927 --> 00:32:11,842
Man, those were the days.
556
00:32:11,886 --> 00:32:14,889
Mikey, you gotta stop
living in the past.
557
00:32:14,933 --> 00:32:16,717
No, man.
558
00:32:16,760 --> 00:32:18,632
Those were the great times.
559
00:32:18,675 --> 00:32:20,155
Clubs were packed.
560
00:32:20,199 --> 00:32:22,853
I was booked 52 weeks a year.
561
00:32:22,897 --> 00:32:26,248
I was getting laid
52 weeks a year.
562
00:32:26,292 --> 00:32:29,556
I was making more money
at 21 than I am now.
563
00:32:29,599 --> 00:32:33,038
Do you know that this summer,
completely wide open.
564
00:32:33,081 --> 00:32:35,127
I had to take a job
driving a limo
565
00:32:35,170 --> 00:32:36,780
just so I don't starve to death.
566
00:32:37,868 --> 00:32:40,045
Man, I wish somebody
would build a time machine
567
00:32:40,088 --> 00:32:42,961
- and take me back to those days.
- Mm-hmm.
568
00:32:44,788 --> 00:32:46,268
Hey, what ever happened
to Laura?
569
00:32:46,312 --> 00:32:49,097
Weren't you guys
supposed to get married?
570
00:32:49,141 --> 00:32:51,970
Yeah, that didn't really
come together.
571
00:32:52,013 --> 00:32:53,928
Well, sorry to hear that.
572
00:32:55,060 --> 00:32:59,325
I really liked her.
You guys were a good couple.
573
00:32:59,368 --> 00:33:01,762
So, who else
do you still talk to?
574
00:33:01,805 --> 00:33:03,633
I don't know.
It's like you said,
575
00:33:03,677 --> 00:33:06,549
there's not a lot of guys
from the old days still around.
576
00:33:06,593 --> 00:33:09,944
What about Ross Daniels?
You hear he's-- he's booking the night show?
577
00:33:09,988 --> 00:33:12,251
Yeah, heard something
about that.
578
00:33:12,294 --> 00:33:13,730
You guys were tight.
579
00:33:13,774 --> 00:33:15,602
- Really?
- Oh, yeah.
580
00:33:15,645 --> 00:33:17,517
They were good friends.
581
00:33:17,560 --> 00:33:19,606
You know, I sent that guy
a tape a while ago.
582
00:33:19,649 --> 00:33:22,304
- Never got back to me.
- Tape?
583
00:33:22,348 --> 00:33:26,134
Maybe it's still
stuck in his VCR. -
584
00:33:27,614 --> 00:33:29,398
You know you could call him.
585
00:33:29,442 --> 00:33:31,618
Maybe you could, uh,
say something about me.
586
00:33:31,661 --> 00:33:33,924
I don't do that, Mikey.
587
00:33:33,968 --> 00:33:36,536
And, uh, besides, I don't think
it's do a lot of good.
588
00:33:36,579 --> 00:33:40,279
If you remember correctly,
the last time I saw him, I broke his nose.
589
00:33:40,322 --> 00:33:42,020
Well, how did that happen?
590
00:33:42,063 --> 00:33:44,544
Oh, my memory's
a little foggy on that.
591
00:33:44,587 --> 00:33:48,113
It might have had something to
do with me banging his fiancée.
592
00:33:48,156 --> 00:33:50,985
Yes, his fiancée. Yeah.
593
00:33:54,380 --> 00:33:58,384
Well, listen, man,
this has been great, but, uh,
594
00:33:58,427 --> 00:34:00,995
I gotta pick a guy up
at the airport in, like, an hour.
595
00:34:02,649 --> 00:34:04,694
I'll walk you to the door.
596
00:34:07,088 --> 00:34:08,829
It's great meeting you, man.
597
00:34:08,872 --> 00:34:11,049
Yeah, good meeting
you, man. Really.
598
00:34:11,092 --> 00:34:14,617
Welcome to the...
whatever world this is. -
599
00:34:18,621 --> 00:34:20,493
It's really good
to see ya again, Mike.
600
00:34:20,536 --> 00:34:22,103
Take care of yourself.
601
00:34:22,147 --> 00:34:24,627
Yeah, you too, Jimmy.
602
00:34:24,671 --> 00:34:26,412
See you soon, old pal.
603
00:34:26,455 --> 00:34:28,327
Sure, Mikey.
604
00:34:28,370 --> 00:34:30,242
- He's gone, right?
- Yeah.
605
00:34:30,285 --> 00:34:31,895
Okay.
606
00:34:31,939 --> 00:34:34,637
I feel bad for that guy.
He's just, he seems sad.
607
00:34:35,986 --> 00:34:38,772
Well, that's the business.
608
00:34:38,815 --> 00:34:40,687
What are you gonna do?
609
00:34:40,730 --> 00:34:42,863
He's not very funny, is he?
610
00:34:42,906 --> 00:34:44,038
Well...
611
00:34:44,995 --> 00:34:48,999
Mikey's a nice guy, but it's
supply and demand, you know?
612
00:34:49,043 --> 00:34:51,263
Back in the day,
613
00:34:51,306 --> 00:34:53,700
any guy who could go on stage
and do, you know,
614
00:34:53,743 --> 00:34:56,616
20 minutes of fart sounds
could make a living.
615
00:34:56,659 --> 00:34:59,532
Now, so many clubs
are closing that...
616
00:35:00,576 --> 00:35:02,839
it doesn't really matter
how nice a guy you are
617
00:35:02,883 --> 00:35:04,450
if you don't respect the art.
618
00:35:06,756 --> 00:35:10,891
Yeah. Well, we should talk about
what we're doing next weekend,
619
00:35:10,934 --> 00:35:13,763
'cause, you know,
I gotta get to New York, so...
620
00:35:13,807 --> 00:35:16,897
New York?
How are you gonna go to New York
621
00:35:16,940 --> 00:35:20,335
before you've seen the
bright lights of Indianapolis?
622
00:35:20,379 --> 00:35:24,122
You want me to take you
to Indianapolis? Is that--
623
00:35:24,165 --> 00:35:25,601
If you wanted to.
624
00:35:26,950 --> 00:35:30,302
All right, sure.
Yeah, I'll take you to Indianapolis. Sure.
625
00:35:30,345 --> 00:35:32,130
Well, you should
get some sleep, though.
626
00:35:32,173 --> 00:35:34,219
You've got that
church gig tomorrow.
627
00:35:34,262 --> 00:35:36,830
Yeah, go to bed.
I'm gonna stay up a while.
628
00:35:38,571 --> 00:35:39,659
All right.
629
00:35:41,226 --> 00:35:42,531
Good night.
630
00:35:54,064 --> 00:35:55,153
Wake up, Jimmy.
631
00:35:56,197 --> 00:35:58,068
Jimmy, you gotta wake up now.
632
00:35:58,112 --> 00:36:00,070
- What?
- You have--
633
00:36:00,114 --> 00:36:01,550
you got a show to do,
remember?
634
00:36:02,551 --> 00:36:03,944
You got that church show.
635
00:36:04,858 --> 00:36:06,990
- Fucking church.
- Yeah.
636
00:36:07,034 --> 00:36:08,731
Well, we got--
we gotta be there at 11,
637
00:36:08,775 --> 00:36:10,037
so let's get going.
638
00:36:23,746 --> 00:36:24,791
All right.
639
00:36:28,011 --> 00:36:29,230
You really need to do that?
640
00:36:30,405 --> 00:36:32,625
It's part of my process.
641
00:36:33,191 --> 00:36:34,322
Okay.
642
00:36:37,847 --> 00:36:39,022
Hey, there.
Are you, Jimmy?
643
00:36:39,327 --> 00:36:41,590
Uh, no. That's Jimmy.
644
00:36:42,461 --> 00:36:44,506
Hey, uh,
how much time you need?
645
00:36:45,028 --> 00:36:47,379
Oh, gosh. Uh, 20 minutes?
646
00:36:47,422 --> 00:36:49,946
But just remember to keep it
squeaky clean.
647
00:36:50,643 --> 00:36:51,818
I've been told.
648
00:36:57,519 --> 00:36:58,825
And finally,
649
00:36:59,304 --> 00:37:03,090
let's offer a prayer
for the Anderson family
650
00:37:03,873 --> 00:37:07,007
who perished in the Fenwick fire
earlier this week.
651
00:37:08,269 --> 00:37:09,749
Let us bow our heads.
652
00:37:24,198 --> 00:37:25,243
Okay...
653
00:37:27,810 --> 00:37:29,377
We've got a little treat for ya.
654
00:37:30,160 --> 00:37:31,727
We have a comedian.
655
00:37:32,424 --> 00:37:33,773
He's gonna entertain us all,
656
00:37:33,816 --> 00:37:35,688
so get ready to laugh.
657
00:37:35,731 --> 00:37:38,778
Please welcome, Jimmy Quinn.
658
00:37:48,222 --> 00:37:49,789
Ugh,
659
00:37:50,616 --> 00:37:51,704
God.
660
00:37:53,532 --> 00:37:55,011
Wow, this is fun.
661
00:37:56,317 --> 00:37:57,884
Ugh.
662
00:37:57,927 --> 00:38:00,626
God, I haven't been
in a church for so long.
663
00:38:01,757 --> 00:38:03,498
If I burst into flames
664
00:38:03,542 --> 00:38:06,588
uh, remember,
the fire exits are located here
665
00:38:06,632 --> 00:38:08,721
and here.
666
00:38:08,764 --> 00:38:10,157
Comedy canard.
667
00:38:10,636 --> 00:38:12,202
A little nervous 'cause, uh,
668
00:38:13,073 --> 00:38:15,597
I know what you did
to your last headlining act.
669
00:38:15,641 --> 00:38:17,817
Tough crowd, huh, J.C.?
670
00:38:18,339 --> 00:38:20,385
It's what happens to you
when you're not funny.
671
00:38:22,082 --> 00:38:24,084
Jesus died for your sins.
672
00:38:24,127 --> 00:38:26,869
I'm dying up here for 250 bucks.
673
00:38:28,697 --> 00:38:31,004
And why would you die
for someone's sins?
674
00:38:31,047 --> 00:38:32,571
It doesn't make any sense.
675
00:38:32,875 --> 00:38:35,704
When you think about it,
your sins are the only
676
00:38:35,748 --> 00:38:38,925
interesting thing
about you sorry dullards.
677
00:38:39,404 --> 00:38:41,144
You're gonna go to confession.
678
00:38:41,188 --> 00:38:44,365
You should be trying to
one up your-- your sins.
679
00:38:44,409 --> 00:38:46,106
Hey, you think that's bad,
Father?
680
00:38:46,149 --> 00:38:47,977
Wait till you hear
what I do next week.
681
00:38:49,588 --> 00:38:52,417
And speaking of sin,
682
00:38:52,765 --> 00:38:55,463
isn't it basically 90%
of every war
683
00:38:55,507 --> 00:38:59,249
that's ever been fought because
of one of your stupid religions?
684
00:38:59,859 --> 00:39:03,428
You never turn on the news
and hear, "200 killed today
685
00:39:03,471 --> 00:39:06,518
when atheist rebels
took heavy shelling
686
00:39:06,561 --> 00:39:09,782
from the agnostic
stronghold in the North."
687
00:39:09,825 --> 00:39:12,262
No, it's your dumb religions
and I'm--
688
00:39:12,741 --> 00:39:14,526
I'm not trying to bag on you.
689
00:39:14,830 --> 00:39:18,747
I mean, I envy that
you have a belief system.
690
00:39:18,791 --> 00:39:20,619
I've tried it.
It didn't work for me.
691
00:39:20,662 --> 00:39:21,968
It didn't make sense.
692
00:39:22,360 --> 00:39:24,840
How do you... justify,
693
00:39:24,884 --> 00:39:28,278
how do you explain to
an eight year old child,
694
00:39:28,322 --> 00:39:33,371
who'd just lost his mother
in a horrific fashion,
695
00:39:33,414 --> 00:39:35,808
that it's part
of some divine plan?
696
00:39:36,286 --> 00:39:39,377
How do you say,
"Oh-- Oh, no. No, Jimmy,
697
00:39:39,420 --> 00:39:41,640
Mommy's not with us anymore.
698
00:39:41,988 --> 00:39:46,471
No. See, God decided
he loved Mommy so much
699
00:39:46,514 --> 00:39:49,038
he wanted her right there
in heaven with him.
700
00:39:49,996 --> 00:39:51,606
So he sent her careening
701
00:39:51,650 --> 00:39:55,393
through a car windshield
at 65 miles an hour.
702
00:39:55,697 --> 00:39:57,220
Such an impact
703
00:39:57,264 --> 00:39:59,440
it tore most of the flesh
off her skull--"
704
00:39:59,484 --> 00:40:01,834
All right,
thank you very much, Mr. Quinn!
705
00:40:01,877 --> 00:40:04,140
- I wasn't done!
- Oh, you are now.
706
00:40:04,184 --> 00:40:06,360
How about a nice
round of applause, everyone?
707
00:40:09,232 --> 00:40:12,627
Okay, let's turn
to first Psalms.
708
00:40:20,679 --> 00:40:23,029
Mr. Quinn, can I help you?
709
00:40:23,725 --> 00:40:25,684
Yeah, I came to get my money.
710
00:40:25,727 --> 00:40:28,382
You don't think
we're really going to
711
00:40:28,426 --> 00:40:30,993
pay you for that filth?
712
00:40:31,646 --> 00:40:34,040
What are you talking about?
I was on a roll up there,
713
00:40:34,083 --> 00:40:36,216
- and you cut me off.
- When I hired a comedian,
714
00:40:36,259 --> 00:40:38,392
I was expecting
something uplifting.
715
00:40:38,436 --> 00:40:41,221
You provided
something different.
716
00:40:41,787 --> 00:40:43,919
I'm afraid you won't be
receiving any money,
717
00:40:43,963 --> 00:40:45,355
but I will pray for you.
718
00:40:46,618 --> 00:40:48,620
First of all, this is bullshit
719
00:40:48,663 --> 00:40:52,145
'cause I did not swear
one time on that goddamn stage
720
00:40:52,188 --> 00:40:54,887
and I can't buy booze
with prayers.
721
00:40:56,062 --> 00:40:58,107
Have a blessed day, Mr. Quinn.
722
00:41:01,284 --> 00:41:03,199
Bless you with
a shoe in your ass!
723
00:41:21,217 --> 00:41:23,393
So what happened?
Are you-- did you get paid?
724
00:41:24,133 --> 00:41:25,831
Well, evidently, uh,
725
00:41:25,874 --> 00:41:29,922
my brand of "clean" wasn't
squeaky enough for them.
726
00:41:30,270 --> 00:41:32,054
Well, yeah, technically,
you were clean.
727
00:41:32,098 --> 00:41:33,752
They-- they didn't pay you?
728
00:41:33,795 --> 00:41:35,928
Well, I sort of paid myself.
729
00:41:37,712 --> 00:41:39,409
Oh, come on.
730
00:41:39,453 --> 00:41:41,586
You can't steal from a church,
Jimmy. Come on.
731
00:41:41,629 --> 00:41:44,414
They tried to rip me off. I ripped them off.
732
00:41:45,067 --> 00:41:46,242
Eye for an eye.
733
00:41:46,286 --> 00:41:47,374
It's in the Bible.
734
00:41:48,418 --> 00:41:51,117
Tell this car to find us
a pawnshop somewhere.
735
00:42:16,446 --> 00:42:18,013
Sorry guys.
I'm gonna call it.
736
00:42:18,057 --> 00:42:20,233
It's 8:15. I got two people.
737
00:42:20,625 --> 00:42:22,931
Sorry, Jimmy.
738
00:42:22,975 --> 00:42:25,630
Don't sweat it.
This kind of shit happens.
739
00:42:26,021 --> 00:42:29,242
I guess all the comedy fans are over at the Will Richards Show.
740
00:42:29,764 --> 00:42:30,896
Catch you next time?
741
00:42:32,941 --> 00:42:34,464
I'm gonna head
over there myself.
742
00:42:34,508 --> 00:42:36,205
I got a buddy that
works over there.
743
00:42:36,554 --> 00:42:38,643
- Well, can we come with?
- Sure.
744
00:42:39,208 --> 00:42:40,296
Jimmy?
745
00:42:40,775 --> 00:42:42,690
How about you
drop me at the hotel?
746
00:42:42,995 --> 00:42:45,171
Come on, you don't
wanna see Will's act?
747
00:42:45,824 --> 00:42:49,741
I think I'd rather be
catheterized with a garden hose.
748
00:42:50,568 --> 00:42:52,308
Okay, well,
just come watch, like,
749
00:42:52,352 --> 00:42:54,484
and you tell me everything
that's wrong with it.
750
00:42:55,964 --> 00:42:57,096
That I can do.
751
00:43:01,753 --> 00:43:04,016
Sit-- sit down,
sit down, stop it, stop it.
752
00:43:04,059 --> 00:43:05,278
Stop it. Y'all too much.
753
00:43:05,321 --> 00:43:06,758
Thank you, Indianapolis.
754
00:43:06,801 --> 00:43:08,760
Thank you so much
for coming out for this.
755
00:43:08,803 --> 00:43:10,109
This is-- this is amazing.
756
00:43:13,765 --> 00:43:16,028
I would love to stay to
keep performing for y'all,
757
00:43:16,071 --> 00:43:17,682
but as Matilda would say,
758
00:43:17,725 --> 00:43:19,988
- "Child, I'm tired!"
- I'm tired!
759
00:43:28,301 --> 00:43:29,868
We love you, Will!
760
00:43:35,134 --> 00:43:36,657
Man, that was awesome!
761
00:43:36,918 --> 00:43:39,007
Jesus, I remember
half of those bits
762
00:43:39,051 --> 00:43:41,836
- from his open mic days.
- Yeah, well, you gotta admit, though,
763
00:43:41,880 --> 00:43:44,447
he's got great energy,
he's got really good stage presence.
764
00:43:44,491 --> 00:43:46,145
Yeah, so do televangelists.
765
00:43:46,188 --> 00:43:47,320
Guys, guys!
766
00:43:47,363 --> 00:43:48,669
I just talked to my buddy.
767
00:43:48,713 --> 00:43:50,149
We're going backstage!
768
00:43:50,192 --> 00:43:52,368
Hi, I'm Angie,
Mr. Richard's assistant.
769
00:43:52,412 --> 00:43:53,892
Which one of you is Jimmy Quinn?
770
00:43:53,935 --> 00:43:55,328
- Oh, he is.
- Follow me.
771
00:43:55,589 --> 00:43:57,199
Let's go!
772
00:44:04,337 --> 00:44:05,555
Mr. Richards?
773
00:44:05,817 --> 00:44:08,036
I have Mr. Quinn
and his party to see you.
774
00:44:11,953 --> 00:44:14,303
Oh, come on.
Bring it in. Bring it in.
775
00:44:14,347 --> 00:44:15,827
Come on.
776
00:44:15,870 --> 00:44:17,567
Come on, baby.
Come on. Get in here.
777
00:44:17,916 --> 00:44:21,136
Oh, Jimmy fucking Quinn!
778
00:44:22,007 --> 00:44:24,009
Why didn't you tell me
you were coming, man? I would've got you tickets.
779
00:44:24,052 --> 00:44:25,837
Did you see the show?
What'd you think?
780
00:44:26,272 --> 00:44:27,490
You're never funnier.
781
00:44:28,753 --> 00:44:30,189
Oh, thanks.
782
00:44:30,232 --> 00:44:31,538
Who are these guys?
783
00:44:32,408 --> 00:44:33,671
That one's, uh, David.
784
00:44:33,714 --> 00:44:35,455
That's my son.
785
00:44:35,498 --> 00:44:37,109
Oh, shit. This is David?
786
00:44:37,762 --> 00:44:40,155
Do you know I was on the road
with your father the night you were born?
787
00:44:40,199 --> 00:44:42,288
Wow. Time flies, man.
Put it there.
788
00:44:42,984 --> 00:44:44,682
Great to meet you, man.
I'm a big fan.
789
00:44:45,944 --> 00:44:47,032
My name's Spike.
790
00:44:49,861 --> 00:44:51,819
So, Jimmy, man,
what you got going on, man?
791
00:44:51,863 --> 00:44:54,256
You, uh, working a gig in town?
What's going on?
792
00:44:54,300 --> 00:44:56,302
Well, Jimmy was gonna play
the YooHoo Room
793
00:44:56,345 --> 00:44:59,131
at the bowling alley, but,
well, they-- not tonight 'cause
794
00:44:59,174 --> 00:45:01,655
they had to cancel
'cause, well, nobody came.
795
00:45:01,960 --> 00:45:03,962
Oh, man I'm sorry to hear that,
but I mean,
796
00:45:04,005 --> 00:45:07,008
but you're still on a road,
right? I love it, man.
797
00:45:07,052 --> 00:45:09,010
I guess I am, too, man.
I'm blessed.
798
00:45:09,054 --> 00:45:11,143
Not like back in the day,
when we were hopeful
799
00:45:11,186 --> 00:45:13,058
and we could make
$200 in the night, huh?
800
00:45:13,101 --> 00:45:14,668
Yeah, you still doing
those movies
801
00:45:14,712 --> 00:45:16,496
where they make
you wear a dress?
802
00:45:22,807 --> 00:45:25,679
You talk about the franchise
that grossed half a billion dollars?
803
00:45:25,984 --> 00:45:27,768
Yeah, I'm still doing those.
804
00:45:28,595 --> 00:45:30,205
Yeah.
805
00:45:30,249 --> 00:45:32,120
Just to think
you would have sold out
806
00:45:32,164 --> 00:45:33,731
for so much less.
807
00:45:33,948 --> 00:45:36,908
I cry about it
every night in my hot tub,
808
00:45:36,951 --> 00:45:38,170
with my supermodel wife.
809
00:45:38,997 --> 00:45:41,260
Yeah, I'm sure
she loves you for you.
810
00:45:42,000 --> 00:45:44,829
Still looking down
on commercial success. Let me ask you this.
811
00:45:44,872 --> 00:45:47,745
When you play the bowling alley,
do you gotta wear the bowling shoes when you're on stage?
812
00:45:47,788 --> 00:45:51,139
- That's good.
- Well, you know, I think your movies are great.
813
00:45:51,183 --> 00:45:54,273
You know, I was telling David
on the way over that you were a hack.
814
00:45:54,316 --> 00:45:58,103
But then I watched your show,
and I realized "hack" is such a lazy word
815
00:45:58,146 --> 00:46:00,409
where so many better ones
would fit.
816
00:46:00,453 --> 00:46:01,846
Like pandering
817
00:46:01,889 --> 00:46:04,196
or, uh, mundane,
818
00:46:04,239 --> 00:46:05,675
pablum,
819
00:46:06,067 --> 00:46:08,853
milquetoast, corn ball,
820
00:46:09,331 --> 00:46:11,856
uh, vapid.
That's always a fun word.
821
00:46:12,421 --> 00:46:14,684
That's quite the vocabulary
you got there, Jimmy.
822
00:46:14,728 --> 00:46:17,426
You know any other words
for alcoholic? Degenerate?
823
00:46:17,470 --> 00:46:20,603
You know,
I think I just heard them announce last call at the bar.
824
00:46:20,647 --> 00:46:22,170
I'm pretty sure they got
a stool waiting for you,
825
00:46:22,214 --> 00:46:23,911
'cause that's what
you do, right? You drink.
826
00:46:23,955 --> 00:46:26,392
You know what? I think
I'm gonna do just that.
827
00:46:26,435 --> 00:46:29,090
Uh, so, guys, I'm out of here.
828
00:46:29,569 --> 00:46:32,006
Or as Matilda would say,
829
00:46:32,050 --> 00:46:34,835
"Fuck you!"
830
00:46:34,879 --> 00:46:36,532
Enjoy your success, Will.
831
00:46:36,924 --> 00:46:38,665
I'll see you clowns out front.
832
00:46:41,233 --> 00:46:42,538
Fucking guy, man.
833
00:46:43,322 --> 00:46:45,803
I'm really sorry
about Jimmy, man. - Ah, stop, stop, stop.
834
00:46:45,846 --> 00:46:47,892
You don't have to apologize
for your father.
835
00:46:47,935 --> 00:46:49,545
I don't hate him.
I pity him.
836
00:46:50,938 --> 00:46:52,722
I love him to death,
though, man, he...
837
00:46:52,766 --> 00:46:55,421
I got my start with him.
He took me on the road with him.
838
00:46:55,464 --> 00:46:58,511
You know, back in the day,
I had the Letterman people come see him?
839
00:46:58,554 --> 00:47:01,079
- Oh, really?
- Yeah, man. They loved him.
840
00:47:01,122 --> 00:47:03,168
Booked the show.
Flew him out and everything.
841
00:47:03,211 --> 00:47:05,083
The night of the show,
he gets drunk,
842
00:47:05,126 --> 00:47:07,085
hooks up with two prostitutes,
843
00:47:07,128 --> 00:47:08,738
and he misses the whole night.
844
00:47:09,565 --> 00:47:10,828
I didn't know that.
845
00:47:12,960 --> 00:47:14,701
Pretty much blackballed him
after that,
846
00:47:16,442 --> 00:47:18,836
and what can I say, man?
The guy's afraid of success.
847
00:47:19,967 --> 00:47:21,621
Look, man, I...
848
00:47:22,448 --> 00:47:25,712
Your father's probably
one of the funniest people I've ever met in my life.
849
00:47:25,755 --> 00:47:27,018
But he has no discipline.
850
00:47:28,454 --> 00:47:31,022
If you learn anything about
this industry, just know that
851
00:47:31,587 --> 00:47:34,634
this business is more than
what you do on stage.
852
00:47:37,506 --> 00:47:38,768
Well, thanks.
853
00:47:38,812 --> 00:47:40,379
I should
probably get back to him.
854
00:47:40,422 --> 00:47:41,902
Uh, thanks for meeting us, man.
855
00:47:41,946 --> 00:47:43,904
- I really appreciate it.
- Sure.
856
00:47:43,948 --> 00:47:47,516
You know, I'm a-- I'm a comic
and I love your work, man.
857
00:47:47,995 --> 00:47:49,779
Like, can I get, like,
your email or...?
858
00:47:50,737 --> 00:47:51,825
Thanks.
859
00:48:07,841 --> 00:48:08,973
Thank you.
860
00:48:12,019 --> 00:48:14,935
I should've known "out front"
meant nearest bar, huh?
861
00:48:15,327 --> 00:48:18,417
Hey, what are ya-- what are ya
drinking? I'm buying.
862
00:48:18,460 --> 00:48:21,115
No! Why would you
embarrass me like that?
863
00:48:21,159 --> 00:48:22,900
Like, you knew I was
a big fan of him.
864
00:48:23,378 --> 00:48:25,293
Wait, you're embarrassed for me?
865
00:48:25,685 --> 00:48:27,252
Have you seen that guy's movies?
866
00:48:27,295 --> 00:48:29,123
Well, he's a big star, Jimmy.
867
00:48:29,167 --> 00:48:31,169
Did you see how many people
came to his show?
868
00:48:31,212 --> 00:48:32,822
You think that matters?
869
00:48:32,866 --> 00:48:33,911
Yeah!
870
00:48:35,173 --> 00:48:37,392
I guess I'm wasting
my time with you.
871
00:48:38,654 --> 00:48:40,439
Will told me about
the Letterman thing.
872
00:48:40,482 --> 00:48:42,310
It's funny you never mention it.
873
00:48:42,354 --> 00:48:43,877
Urban legend.
874
00:48:43,921 --> 00:48:45,618
Okay, well, he said
you got too drunk.
875
00:48:45,661 --> 00:48:47,272
You never even made it
to the taping.
876
00:48:48,142 --> 00:48:50,623
Yeah, that's probably the way
he wants to remember it.
877
00:48:51,189 --> 00:48:52,799
Well, what's your side
of the story?
878
00:48:54,932 --> 00:48:56,759
He wanted me to wear a suit.
879
00:48:58,065 --> 00:48:59,719
What? So?
880
00:48:59,762 --> 00:49:01,590
Can you picture me
in a fucking suit?
881
00:49:02,069 --> 00:49:04,506
I mean, that's how it starts.
They dress you up,
882
00:49:04,550 --> 00:49:06,247
they go through all your jokes,
883
00:49:06,291 --> 00:49:08,119
and they take all the teeth
out of them
884
00:49:08,162 --> 00:49:10,077
so they're not funny anymore.
885
00:49:10,121 --> 00:49:12,427
And they send you out there
with no guns.
886
00:49:12,471 --> 00:49:14,560
And for what? Like,
887
00:49:14,603 --> 00:49:16,431
so you can get a sitcom?
888
00:49:17,084 --> 00:49:20,044
Play the idiot dad
with the catchphrase?
889
00:49:20,653 --> 00:49:26,093
And then shilling
infomercials for some garbage.
890
00:49:26,441 --> 00:49:27,877
"Hi, do you remember me?
891
00:49:27,921 --> 00:49:31,229
I was Scooch
from My Nutty Cousin,
892
00:49:31,272 --> 00:49:32,926
and now I wanna talk to
893
00:49:33,318 --> 00:49:36,756
gullible old fucks
about reverse mortgages."
894
00:49:36,799 --> 00:49:38,453
Yeah, Okay. Yeah.
895
00:49:38,497 --> 00:49:40,455
So instead your working
the bowling alley.
896
00:49:41,195 --> 00:49:44,503
Yeah, I'm working in
a bowling alley with my words
897
00:49:44,938 --> 00:49:48,724
wearing my own clothes
and doing it my own way.
898
00:49:48,768 --> 00:49:50,813
Yeah, and with
my mom's credit card.
899
00:49:50,857 --> 00:49:53,642
So what are we doing?
We're going back to the hotel?
900
00:49:53,686 --> 00:49:55,079
That's...
901
00:49:55,470 --> 00:49:58,169
I gotta feeling I'm gonna be
closing this place down.
902
00:49:59,561 --> 00:50:01,302
Well, I should've known that.
Okay.
903
00:50:32,029 --> 00:50:35,032
Yo, no sign
of your sleepy time tea?
904
00:50:36,642 --> 00:50:41,908
Enjoy your backstage pass
to Captain Hot Tub?
905
00:50:44,041 --> 00:50:45,085
Hot tub.
906
00:50:46,304 --> 00:50:48,523
Real comics don't even bathe.
907
00:50:50,873 --> 00:50:53,572
You wouldn't even get
my backstage pass
908
00:50:54,051 --> 00:50:55,530
if you dropped my name.
909
00:50:56,401 --> 00:50:57,880
Because I am funny.
910
00:50:59,012 --> 00:51:00,318
People fucking know it.
911
00:51:02,407 --> 00:51:04,061
You're not even funny yet
912
00:51:04,365 --> 00:51:05,758
and you're funnier than that.
913
00:51:30,217 --> 00:51:31,784
All right, Jimmy.
Time to wake up.
914
00:51:33,220 --> 00:51:34,787
What time is it?
915
00:51:34,830 --> 00:51:36,223
It's, uh, it's 11:00.
916
00:51:37,790 --> 00:51:39,052
Am I on a bus?
917
00:51:40,358 --> 00:51:42,621
No, uh, I'm taking you to Akron
918
00:51:42,664 --> 00:51:44,710
since it's, uh, on my way.
919
00:51:44,753 --> 00:51:45,798
So...
920
00:51:47,104 --> 00:51:50,019
If that's what you want
it's okay by me.
921
00:51:51,717 --> 00:51:52,805
All right.
922
00:51:54,241 --> 00:51:55,286
Well, let's go.
923
00:52:18,004 --> 00:52:19,962
Well, I talked to my mom.
924
00:52:20,006 --> 00:52:23,401
Um, she seemed a lot better,
and both my parents agreed to
925
00:52:23,444 --> 00:52:25,098
give me a year to pursue this.
926
00:52:25,142 --> 00:52:27,405
Like, isn't that great?
927
00:52:27,448 --> 00:52:28,536
Full year, huh?
928
00:52:29,363 --> 00:52:32,192
Yeah, you ought to be
a huge star by then.
929
00:52:32,758 --> 00:52:33,846
Yeah.
930
00:52:39,504 --> 00:52:41,201
So you want to meet your aunt?
931
00:52:41,593 --> 00:52:42,942
Yeah, I have an aunt?
932
00:52:43,638 --> 00:52:45,988
I got a sister.
That means you have an aunt.
933
00:52:46,032 --> 00:52:47,599
Nancy.
934
00:52:48,034 --> 00:52:51,820
She lives in, uh, Findlay,
so it's not far off from Akron.
935
00:52:53,561 --> 00:52:54,954
Yeah. What's she like?
936
00:52:55,389 --> 00:52:57,304
She's cool.
937
00:52:57,348 --> 00:52:59,045
Lives with her partner, Julie.
938
00:53:10,230 --> 00:53:12,232
She'll probably make you
shovel her walk.
939
00:53:13,233 --> 00:53:14,278
It's nice of her.
940
00:53:17,933 --> 00:53:19,805
- Hey!
- Oh, my God. Jimmy!
941
00:53:19,848 --> 00:53:21,241
How you doing?
942
00:53:21,285 --> 00:53:22,895
Jimmy, oh,
it's so good to see you!
943
00:53:22,938 --> 00:53:24,810
It's been too long!
944
00:53:24,853 --> 00:53:27,552
Oh, let me look at you.
945
00:53:28,335 --> 00:53:29,510
You look like shit.
946
00:53:29,989 --> 00:53:31,991
Thank you very much.
I love you, too.
947
00:53:32,034 --> 00:53:33,427
- Jules.
- Jimmy.
948
00:53:34,689 --> 00:53:36,343
Oh, my goodness.
949
00:53:36,387 --> 00:53:38,040
You must be David.
950
00:53:38,084 --> 00:53:40,217
- In the flesh.
- Good to meet ya.
951
00:53:40,260 --> 00:53:42,393
Get over here!
Give me a hug!
952
00:53:42,436 --> 00:53:44,482
Oh, I haven't seen you
since you were a baby.
953
00:53:44,525 --> 00:53:47,136
Yeah, though it's great
to meet ya. Both you guys. Yeah.
954
00:53:47,180 --> 00:53:49,530
Well, come on in, it's cold!
It's freezing out here.
955
00:53:49,574 --> 00:53:51,140
Please, please,
please, this way.
956
00:53:55,144 --> 00:53:56,755
So you just
showed up at his door?
957
00:53:56,798 --> 00:53:58,322
That must have been a shock.
958
00:53:58,365 --> 00:54:00,715
Yeah, yeah, definitely.
959
00:54:00,976 --> 00:54:02,935
Well, I for one,
am just delighted.
960
00:54:02,978 --> 00:54:05,329
I was so happy
when Jimmy called last week.
961
00:54:05,372 --> 00:54:06,808
Said you two were coming.
962
00:54:09,681 --> 00:54:11,160
Oh, yeah, well,
963
00:54:11,204 --> 00:54:13,075
you're on the way to the gig,
964
00:54:13,119 --> 00:54:16,862
so how could I not stop in
and say hello?
965
00:54:16,905 --> 00:54:18,690
Family is so important.
966
00:54:19,168 --> 00:54:21,562
- Hear, hear.
- Oh, speaking of,
967
00:54:21,606 --> 00:54:24,086
you really should stop in
and see Dad before you leave.
968
00:54:24,565 --> 00:54:26,437
He's not doing too well.
969
00:54:26,480 --> 00:54:28,787
- This might be your last chance.
- Look...
970
00:54:29,570 --> 00:54:32,443
I said everything I had
to say to him the night I left.
971
00:54:33,705 --> 00:54:35,881
That was over 30 years ago.
972
00:54:35,924 --> 00:54:38,884
Well, you really owe it
to yourself and to David.
973
00:54:39,450 --> 00:54:41,190
Yeah, I would
really like to meet him.
974
00:54:41,843 --> 00:54:44,106
But I have nothing to say
to the guy.
975
00:54:44,150 --> 00:54:45,369
End of story.
976
00:54:47,588 --> 00:54:50,417
One of the things that Julie
has helped me to realize,
977
00:54:50,461 --> 00:54:52,376
you can't hold on to resentment.
978
00:54:52,419 --> 00:54:54,639
Dad did the best he could.
979
00:54:54,987 --> 00:54:56,945
Nancy, you know
that's bullshit.
980
00:54:58,338 --> 00:55:00,819
Well, you need to
try to forgive him
981
00:55:00,862 --> 00:55:03,082
for your own peace of mind.
982
00:55:03,125 --> 00:55:04,301
Fuck him.
983
00:55:06,085 --> 00:55:09,306
It wasn't easy for him
when Mom died
984
00:55:09,697 --> 00:55:11,830
raising two little kids
on his own,
985
00:55:11,873 --> 00:55:14,267
working at the factory.
986
00:55:14,311 --> 00:55:15,921
Besides,
it wasn't all his fault.
987
00:55:15,964 --> 00:55:18,010
He was basically an alcoholic.
988
00:55:18,402 --> 00:55:20,969
And you remember
what Grandpa was like. - Yeah, yeah, yeah.
989
00:55:21,013 --> 00:55:22,449
Grandpa, come on.
990
00:55:22,493 --> 00:55:24,103
Are you trying
to get me to leave?
991
00:55:24,146 --> 00:55:25,670
Can we talk about
something else?
992
00:55:25,713 --> 00:55:26,888
Does he live in town?
993
00:55:27,454 --> 00:55:29,021
He's at a nursing home.
994
00:55:29,456 --> 00:55:30,936
It's 5 minutes away.
995
00:55:32,024 --> 00:55:33,765
He's had a couple of strokes.
996
00:55:34,505 --> 00:55:37,203
I'm not even sure if he knows
when we are there.
997
00:55:42,469 --> 00:55:44,036
Who wants more potato salad?
998
00:55:45,951 --> 00:55:48,780
- Another bite?
- Nah, we gotta-- we gotta roll.
999
00:55:48,823 --> 00:55:51,043
We got a two-hour drive
to Akron,
1000
00:55:51,086 --> 00:55:52,523
so I'm gonna hit the head.
1001
00:55:52,566 --> 00:55:54,655
I will take this mess
into the kitchen.
1002
00:55:59,660 --> 00:56:02,141
I'm glad we've got
a minute alone.
1003
00:56:02,184 --> 00:56:03,621
I'm worried about Jimmy.
1004
00:56:03,664 --> 00:56:05,449
He really looks terrible.
1005
00:56:05,492 --> 00:56:07,494
Is he okay?
1006
00:56:09,104 --> 00:56:12,934
Ah, no, you know,
he's-- he's drinking a lot.
1007
00:56:12,978 --> 00:56:16,024
He just... he just doesn't
take care of himself at all.
1008
00:56:18,418 --> 00:56:19,593
You're a good kid.
1009
00:56:19,637 --> 00:56:21,203
I'm glad you two reconnected.
1010
00:56:21,247 --> 00:56:23,205
Oh, yeah. So am I.
No, yeah.
1011
00:56:23,249 --> 00:56:26,644
But, um, you know, what was
it like for you guys as kids?
1012
00:56:26,687 --> 00:56:28,994
Well, it wasn't easy.
1013
00:56:29,037 --> 00:56:31,823
Um, our dad was strict.
1014
00:56:32,737 --> 00:56:35,783
He was mad at the world,
and he took it out on Jimmy.
1015
00:56:35,827 --> 00:56:38,960
They would
get into horrible fights.
1016
00:56:39,004 --> 00:56:40,353
Sorry to hear about that.
1017
00:56:41,093 --> 00:56:44,531
But you know what?
That's all in the past.
1018
00:56:46,141 --> 00:56:51,103
I just think seeing him
might give Jimmy some closure.
1019
00:56:51,146 --> 00:56:54,106
And if he doesn't,
he might regret it.
1020
00:56:54,149 --> 00:56:55,586
Oh, definitely. Yeah.
1021
00:56:55,629 --> 00:56:57,239
Um, where's this place at?
1022
00:56:57,936 --> 00:57:00,460
It's right up the street
off Route 12.
1023
00:57:00,504 --> 00:57:02,331
Um, you can't miss it.
1024
00:57:03,420 --> 00:57:06,248
So, you'll be heading
out to New York soon?
1025
00:57:06,292 --> 00:57:09,861
Yeah, that's the plan.
I'm, uh, pretty excited. So...
1026
00:57:09,904 --> 00:57:11,210
You about ready?
1027
00:57:11,253 --> 00:57:12,951
Yeah. Yeah, let's do it.
1028
00:57:15,344 --> 00:57:16,737
I love you.
1029
00:57:18,478 --> 00:57:20,915
Don't take so long
between visits, hmm?
1030
00:57:21,786 --> 00:57:23,396
Thank you.
1031
00:57:23,440 --> 00:57:24,528
For everything.
1032
00:57:29,576 --> 00:57:31,360
And you, take care of her.
1033
00:57:31,404 --> 00:57:32,666
I will.
1034
00:57:33,624 --> 00:57:36,017
David, you know
you're welcome here anytime.
1035
00:57:36,061 --> 00:57:37,192
Well, thanks, Aunt Nancy.
1036
00:57:37,976 --> 00:57:40,587
I like the sound of that.
1037
00:57:41,936 --> 00:57:42,981
Thank you, again.
1038
00:57:43,024 --> 00:57:44,199
You, too. You, too
1039
00:57:45,331 --> 00:57:47,768
You guys were a pleasure.
So thanks for having us.
1040
00:57:47,812 --> 00:57:49,988
- Aww, drive safe.
- Have a good one.
1041
00:57:51,772 --> 00:57:54,383
Well, I'm glad we stopped. I-- I really like them.
1042
00:57:55,776 --> 00:57:57,212
She's the best.
1043
00:57:57,517 --> 00:57:59,084
Yeah, and Julie, too.
1044
00:57:59,127 --> 00:58:00,564
You should visit them
more often.
1045
00:58:01,086 --> 00:58:02,391
Mm-hmm.
1046
00:58:15,448 --> 00:58:16,928
Why are we stopped?
1047
00:58:26,285 --> 00:58:28,156
What the fuck
do you think you're doing?
1048
00:58:28,766 --> 00:58:31,159
I wanna meet my grandfather.
1049
00:58:31,203 --> 00:58:32,900
What are you trying
to prove with this?
1050
00:58:33,901 --> 00:58:36,121
Nothing. I have the right to
meet my grandfather.
1051
00:58:36,164 --> 00:58:38,123
And also, it's my car.
1052
00:58:40,299 --> 00:58:42,997
Fine. Knock yourself out.
1053
00:58:43,041 --> 00:58:44,129
I'll be right here.
1054
00:58:47,132 --> 00:58:48,612
This is your dad.
1055
00:58:48,655 --> 00:58:50,222
Are you really not
coming with me?
1056
00:58:50,875 --> 00:58:53,007
I've nothing to say to the guy.
1057
00:58:55,706 --> 00:58:58,622
Okay, well. I'm going in.
1058
00:59:02,713 --> 00:59:03,757
Going.
1059
00:59:05,106 --> 00:59:06,194
Bye-bye.
1060
00:59:08,849 --> 00:59:10,285
Hey, just come with me.
1061
00:59:10,329 --> 00:59:11,809
I haven't asked you
anything else.
1062
00:59:11,852 --> 00:59:13,506
Just do this one thing
for me, okay?
1063
00:59:17,118 --> 00:59:18,424
God damn it.
1064
00:59:27,389 --> 00:59:28,565
Five minutes.
1065
00:59:30,349 --> 00:59:32,133
Okay. Good. Let's go.
1066
00:59:37,835 --> 00:59:39,793
So this is Mr. Quinn's room.
1067
00:59:43,971 --> 00:59:45,364
I'll leave you all alone.
1068
00:59:55,200 --> 00:59:56,636
Hi, I'm your--
1069
00:59:57,158 --> 00:59:58,595
I'm your grandson, David.
1070
01:00:00,118 --> 01:00:01,380
How you doing, um...
1071
01:00:02,947 --> 01:00:04,557
This is your son Jimmy.
1072
01:00:09,562 --> 01:00:11,346
I don't think he hears us.
1073
01:00:18,353 --> 01:00:21,356
I'mma go find a vending machine.
1074
01:00:45,467 --> 01:00:46,860
Look at you now.
1075
01:00:49,471 --> 01:00:51,430
Used to be such a big man.
1076
01:00:54,128 --> 01:00:56,174
You're not King Shit anymore.
1077
01:00:59,090 --> 01:01:00,439
You're a fucking vegetable.
1078
01:01:02,571 --> 01:01:03,747
Serves you right.
1079
01:01:05,009 --> 01:01:06,445
Karma's a bitch.
1080
01:01:07,707 --> 01:01:09,578
Why did you have to be
such an asshole?
1081
01:01:11,580 --> 01:01:13,365
Supposed to be my father.
1082
01:01:14,758 --> 01:01:16,237
You have any idea
1083
01:01:17,369 --> 01:01:19,066
how much I tried to
1084
01:01:19,110 --> 01:01:21,982
just get one nod
of attention out of you?
1085
01:01:23,331 --> 01:01:24,724
And all you ever did was
1086
01:01:25,769 --> 01:01:26,944
make me feel...
1087
01:01:28,162 --> 01:01:29,337
awkward.
1088
01:01:30,251 --> 01:01:31,513
Stupid.
1089
01:01:35,082 --> 01:01:36,344
I hope you don't die.
1090
01:01:36,388 --> 01:01:38,520
I hope you just sit there,
1091
01:01:38,564 --> 01:01:40,697
rot, and think about that.
1092
01:01:41,872 --> 01:01:42,960
Do you hear me?
1093
01:01:45,440 --> 01:01:46,703
Do you?
1094
01:01:56,930 --> 01:01:58,018
Dad?
1095
01:02:10,727 --> 01:02:14,034
I, uh, couldn't
find any vending machines.
1096
01:02:17,298 --> 01:02:18,386
Yeah.
1097
01:02:18,430 --> 01:02:19,736
Let's get out of here.
1098
01:02:39,320 --> 01:02:40,365
Thank you.
1099
01:02:42,889 --> 01:02:45,936
Think I, uh, need to apologize.
1100
01:02:45,979 --> 01:02:47,067
For what?
1101
01:02:48,852 --> 01:02:50,201
For not being your father.
1102
01:02:52,638 --> 01:02:54,161
I had a great father.
1103
01:02:54,205 --> 01:02:55,641
I had a great childhood.
1104
01:02:55,684 --> 01:02:57,774
There's no hard feelings,
really.
1105
01:03:15,400 --> 01:03:17,924
Okay, we got a problem.
1106
01:03:17,968 --> 01:03:19,186
Feature act isn't here.
1107
01:03:19,230 --> 01:03:20,840
I can't get him on the phone,
1108
01:03:20,884 --> 01:03:24,626
so I'm going to need you
to do an hour and a half.
1109
01:03:25,018 --> 01:03:26,933
- Kidding?
- I don't know what else to do.
1110
01:03:28,326 --> 01:03:30,589
- Can you do 20?
- Yeah, I can do 20.
1111
01:03:30,632 --> 01:03:32,373
All right. Cool.
Bring my son up.
1112
01:03:32,417 --> 01:03:33,940
He'll do a set.
I'll close it out.
1113
01:03:33,984 --> 01:03:36,160
- Are you a comedian?
- Yeah.
1114
01:03:36,203 --> 01:03:37,509
Great. What's your name?
1115
01:03:37,552 --> 01:03:38,902
Dave Moranto.
1116
01:03:39,293 --> 01:03:40,991
Okay, I'm gonna start the show.
1117
01:03:41,034 --> 01:03:42,296
All right, cool.
1118
01:03:43,428 --> 01:03:44,559
Thanks, Jimmy.
1119
01:03:44,908 --> 01:03:46,779
- Just be funny.
- Yeah.
1120
01:03:49,434 --> 01:03:52,219
Welcome to the show, everybody.
You ready to have a good time?
1121
01:03:53,742 --> 01:03:55,657
I love this group.
1122
01:03:55,701 --> 01:03:58,008
Well, listen, you know,
we only have one rule here.
1123
01:03:58,051 --> 01:04:00,401
It's real simple.
The more you drink,
1124
01:04:00,445 --> 01:04:02,316
the funnier
those comics are gonna be.
1125
01:04:02,360 --> 01:04:04,884
You got that?
So let's get it started.
1126
01:04:04,928 --> 01:04:07,495
Your first comic.
How about it, everybody?
1127
01:04:07,539 --> 01:04:10,542
A big round of applause.
David Moranto. Keep it going!
1128
01:04:17,636 --> 01:04:20,421
All right.
Give it up for, uh, that guy.
1129
01:04:20,465 --> 01:04:22,206
Okay. Yeah.
1130
01:04:24,251 --> 01:04:25,992
Good to be here, man.
Good to be here.
1131
01:04:26,036 --> 01:04:28,952
Hey, it's my girlfriend.
1132
01:04:28,995 --> 01:04:30,562
All right.
Good to be here, man.
1133
01:04:30,605 --> 01:04:32,520
I, uh, I know
I kinda look like a, uh
1134
01:04:32,564 --> 01:04:34,566
John Cusack
before he hit puberty.
1135
01:04:38,048 --> 01:04:40,746
I, uh, I just dropped out
of med school.
1136
01:04:41,138 --> 01:04:43,314
Hold your applause.
1137
01:04:43,357 --> 01:04:44,968
Let me show you guys
an impression
1138
01:04:45,011 --> 01:04:47,796
of what our group study sessions
look like.
1139
01:05:04,030 --> 01:05:05,075
Kid's funny.
1140
01:05:09,209 --> 01:05:10,384
"Dude...
1141
01:05:11,951 --> 01:05:14,736
...if humans can see water,
1142
01:05:14,780 --> 01:05:16,608
can fish see air?"
1143
01:05:18,262 --> 01:05:20,220
I'm just like,
that's a lot of pressure.
1144
01:05:23,310 --> 01:05:25,834
I'm not sure I can
follow that command.
1145
01:05:26,357 --> 01:05:27,488
You guys have been great.
1146
01:05:27,532 --> 01:05:29,055
Thanks so much. Appreciate it.
1147
01:05:29,099 --> 01:05:31,057
You gonna love your headliner,
everybody.
1148
01:05:31,449 --> 01:05:33,973
Good room.
I'm Dave Moranto. Thank you.
1149
01:05:34,017 --> 01:05:35,932
Keep it going!
1150
01:05:37,629 --> 01:05:39,196
Good job!
1151
01:05:40,066 --> 01:05:41,502
Good job!
1152
01:05:41,546 --> 01:05:43,461
How 'bout it? Dave Moranto.
1153
01:05:51,817 --> 01:05:52,949
Hey, thanks.
1154
01:05:56,909 --> 01:05:58,650
That's what I'm talking about.
1155
01:05:58,693 --> 01:06:00,652
Are we having a good time? Yes.
1156
01:06:00,695 --> 01:06:02,741
Well, are you ready
for your headliner?
1157
01:06:02,784 --> 01:06:04,395
Uh, what did you think?
1158
01:06:04,438 --> 01:06:06,353
I think so.
Let's put it together.
1159
01:06:06,397 --> 01:06:08,094
- Good crowd.
- Love this crowd.
1160
01:06:08,138 --> 01:06:09,791
He is The Road Dog.
Put it together.
1161
01:06:09,835 --> 01:06:11,532
Jimmy Quinn, everybody!
1162
01:06:17,408 --> 01:06:18,757
Thank you!
1163
01:06:18,800 --> 01:06:20,541
Louis, Ladies and gentlemen.
1164
01:06:22,195 --> 01:06:24,763
Hey, my name's Jimmy,
and I'm an alcoholic.
1165
01:06:33,467 --> 01:06:35,382
Ready to hit the road?
1166
01:06:35,426 --> 01:06:36,993
Yeah, I guess.
1167
01:06:37,036 --> 01:06:39,169
Thank you so much.
Great set. Great set.
1168
01:06:39,212 --> 01:06:41,040
I thought you might want this.
1169
01:06:41,084 --> 01:06:44,043
Uh, we record all the comics,
so here's a copy for you.
1170
01:06:44,087 --> 01:06:45,958
I finally got a hold
of the feature act.
1171
01:06:46,002 --> 01:06:47,786
He will be here tomorrow.
1172
01:06:47,829 --> 01:06:50,180
But I'm telling you,
any time you want a booking,
1173
01:06:50,223 --> 01:06:52,530
just give me a call.
We would love to have you.
1174
01:06:52,573 --> 01:06:54,227
And really, thanks again.
All right?
1175
01:06:54,271 --> 01:06:55,924
And, Jimmy, good job as usual!
1176
01:06:55,968 --> 01:06:57,187
Thanks, Lou.
1177
01:06:58,101 --> 01:06:59,537
You were so funny!
1178
01:06:59,580 --> 01:07:01,234
Yeah, you were, like,
the funniest.
1179
01:07:01,278 --> 01:07:03,671
Oh, thanks.
Appreciate it.
1180
01:07:03,715 --> 01:07:09,112
Um, we're heading over
to Shea for drinks if you wanna join us?
1181
01:07:09,155 --> 01:07:11,027
Uh, that's really nice.
1182
01:07:11,070 --> 01:07:13,029
I-- I gotta get back, though.
1183
01:07:14,421 --> 01:07:16,119
Okay.
1184
01:07:16,162 --> 01:07:17,729
Sorry.
1185
01:07:17,772 --> 01:07:18,860
Sorry.
1186
01:07:20,645 --> 01:07:21,733
"Shea?
1187
01:07:21,776 --> 01:07:23,865
I'd love to go to Shea!
1188
01:07:23,909 --> 01:07:26,216
Appletinis on me, girls."
1189
01:07:27,347 --> 01:07:28,957
Let's get the fuck out of here.
1190
01:07:30,872 --> 01:07:31,960
Yeah.
1191
01:07:44,930 --> 01:07:47,933
You know, you haven't said
a word about my set tonight.
1192
01:07:49,978 --> 01:07:52,633
What do you want me to say?
1193
01:07:52,677 --> 01:07:54,461
You know,
what'd you think of it?
1194
01:07:56,028 --> 01:07:58,683
It shouldn't matter
what anybody thinks.
1195
01:07:58,726 --> 01:08:00,293
Well, it matters
what you think.
1196
01:08:00,337 --> 01:08:01,686
I respect your opinion.
1197
01:08:06,560 --> 01:08:07,648
So?
1198
01:08:08,301 --> 01:08:09,650
So...
1199
01:08:10,303 --> 01:08:14,133
It's all style and no substance.
1200
01:08:14,177 --> 01:08:15,830
You got no voice.
1201
01:08:17,354 --> 01:08:18,877
You got no point of view.
1202
01:08:18,920 --> 01:08:22,663
There was none of you
in that set.
1203
01:08:22,707 --> 01:08:28,060
You gotta understand...
fuckin' comedy's about pain.
1204
01:08:28,104 --> 01:08:31,194
What pain have you ever felt?
1205
01:08:31,237 --> 01:08:33,805
You've had a perfect childhood,
1206
01:08:33,848 --> 01:08:37,113
perfect teeth, girls like you.
1207
01:08:37,156 --> 01:08:40,725
So you get nothing 'cause
you got nothing to work with.
1208
01:08:41,639 --> 01:08:43,728
Okay, well,
sorry I'm not Kurt Cobain,
1209
01:08:43,771 --> 01:08:46,165
but that crowd
seemed to like me. - Ugh!
1210
01:08:46,209 --> 01:08:51,344
Never underestimate
the stupidity of large groups of people.
1211
01:08:52,128 --> 01:08:53,912
So you're saying
my act is stupid?
1212
01:08:54,521 --> 01:08:56,741
No. I just let you
say it for me.
1213
01:08:57,872 --> 01:09:00,788
Just saying there's more to it
than just standing up there
1214
01:09:00,832 --> 01:09:02,312
and telling jokes.
1215
01:09:05,532 --> 01:09:07,534
There wasn't one part
that you liked?
1216
01:09:08,753 --> 01:09:11,538
What was your favorite part?
1217
01:09:16,630 --> 01:09:17,849
You're a dick!
1218
01:09:22,506 --> 01:09:24,072
You know what I think?
1219
01:09:24,116 --> 01:09:26,074
I think you're kind of jealous,
you know,
1220
01:09:26,118 --> 01:09:28,164
because you can't
stand the fact that--
1221
01:09:29,817 --> 01:09:31,384
Oh, my God, that's blood!
1222
01:09:31,428 --> 01:09:32,690
Get out of here!
1223
01:09:32,733 --> 01:09:34,648
No, that's hematemesis!
1224
01:09:34,692 --> 01:09:36,346
We need to get you
to a hospital!
1225
01:09:36,389 --> 01:09:38,609
I don't need a fucking hospital!
1226
01:09:38,652 --> 01:09:40,915
No, you're sick!
You need to see a doctor!
1227
01:09:41,742 --> 01:09:44,310
I've already seen a doctor.
1228
01:09:45,485 --> 01:09:46,965
When?
1229
01:09:47,008 --> 01:09:48,227
Get the fuck out!
1230
01:10:01,545 --> 01:10:03,851
Okay, well, I wanna know
what this doctor told you.
1231
01:10:04,939 --> 01:10:06,767
I think that would be a breach
1232
01:10:06,811 --> 01:10:09,640
of doctor/patient
confidentiality.
1233
01:10:09,683 --> 01:10:11,642
Well, goddammit, Jimmy,
he told you
1234
01:10:11,685 --> 01:10:13,731
if you don't quit drinking,
you're going to die, right?
1235
01:10:13,774 --> 01:10:15,341
We're all gonna die.
1236
01:10:16,081 --> 01:10:17,343
So you don't care?
1237
01:10:18,126 --> 01:10:19,998
That's what this
whole thing's been about?
1238
01:10:20,041 --> 01:10:22,043
Just-- just you saying goodbye?
1239
01:10:22,914 --> 01:10:25,438
I'm going out doing
what I do best.
1240
01:10:25,482 --> 01:10:28,136
And you expect me to sit here
and watch you kill yourself?
1241
01:10:28,180 --> 01:10:31,705
I was never
expecting you at all.
1242
01:10:31,749 --> 01:10:33,577
You're a big boy now.
1243
01:10:33,620 --> 01:10:36,754
You can do
whatever it is you like.
1244
01:10:36,797 --> 01:10:38,408
Yeah, I am.
1245
01:10:38,451 --> 01:10:40,714
What the fuck
do you think you're doing?
1246
01:10:40,758 --> 01:10:42,238
You gotta stop drinking!
1247
01:10:42,281 --> 01:10:45,241
Fuck are you
to tell me what to do?
1248
01:10:45,284 --> 01:10:48,069
You're--
You don't mean shit to me.
1249
01:10:48,113 --> 01:10:49,810
You'd have figured that out.
1250
01:10:49,854 --> 01:10:51,769
You're nothing but my ride.
1251
01:10:54,032 --> 01:10:56,295
All right, fuck this. I'm--
1252
01:10:56,339 --> 01:10:59,080
I'm out. I'm not dealing
with this fucking shit.
1253
01:10:59,124 --> 01:11:00,908
David!
1254
01:11:02,388 --> 01:11:03,868
David,
1255
01:11:03,911 --> 01:11:06,087
I'm sorry.
1256
01:11:06,131 --> 01:11:07,480
I shouldn't have said that.
1257
01:11:07,524 --> 01:11:09,352
Listen, just,
1258
01:11:09,395 --> 01:11:12,398
just bear with me
for a little bit longer.
1259
01:11:16,576 --> 01:11:18,970
I can't sit here and watch you
commit suicide.
1260
01:11:19,013 --> 01:11:21,973
- I'm not--
- Just one-- just get me to Columbus.
1261
01:11:22,016 --> 01:11:24,541
- Just one more gig.
- All right.
1262
01:11:24,584 --> 01:11:29,241
I'll take you to Columbus,
but then I'm going. Okay?
1263
01:11:38,032 --> 01:11:41,340
You know,
I-- I just don't get it. Like, why can't you stop?
1264
01:11:43,516 --> 01:11:45,997
I'm a lost cause, kid.
1265
01:11:46,040 --> 01:11:48,695
Don't start caring
about me too much.
1266
01:11:53,134 --> 01:11:54,222
Too late.
1267
01:12:10,108 --> 01:12:11,675
Is this the place?
1268
01:12:11,718 --> 01:12:13,546
Yeah,
I just gotta drop off a letter.
1269
01:12:16,070 --> 01:12:19,726
Hey, is that the girl from the pictures? What--
1270
01:12:19,770 --> 01:12:22,338
Why are you ducking?
Is there a sniper?
1271
01:12:22,381 --> 01:12:26,385
I-- I wrote her a letter
and I just wanna stick it in her mailbox.
1272
01:12:26,429 --> 01:12:29,257
- Is she gone?
- Yeah, she went inside.
1273
01:12:31,259 --> 01:12:34,045
Okay, well, I don't get it.
She's right there. Just...
1274
01:12:34,088 --> 01:12:36,526
Nah, I can't talk to her
face-to-face.
1275
01:12:36,569 --> 01:12:39,659
Come on, man.
You really can't just go and talk to her?
1276
01:12:39,703 --> 01:12:43,968
You don't-- Shut up.
You don't understand. We were engaged.
1277
01:12:44,011 --> 01:12:48,929
And I completely disappeared
on her. I just... ghosted her.
1278
01:12:48,973 --> 01:12:51,236
I wouldn't even
answer her phone calls.
1279
01:12:51,279 --> 01:12:53,194
I haven't seen her
in over 20 years.
1280
01:12:53,238 --> 01:12:56,067
Okay, well, at least you could
go talk to her, you know...
1281
01:12:56,110 --> 01:12:57,155
like a man?
1282
01:12:58,243 --> 01:12:59,897
Pretty sure I'm the last person
1283
01:12:59,940 --> 01:13:02,334
she wants to see
at her doorstep, so...
1284
01:13:02,378 --> 01:13:03,422
keep the car runnin'.
1285
01:13:36,063 --> 01:13:37,587
- Jimmy?
- Laura.
1286
01:13:37,630 --> 01:13:41,155
I wrote you a letter, and...
1287
01:13:41,199 --> 01:13:44,115
well, I was just
gonna stick it in your...
1288
01:13:45,377 --> 01:13:46,422
Uh...
1289
01:13:49,337 --> 01:13:51,514
Wait!
1290
01:13:51,557 --> 01:13:54,038
If you have something
to say to me...
1291
01:13:56,083 --> 01:13:58,216
say it to my face.
1292
01:14:00,174 --> 01:14:02,133
All right. Uh...
1293
01:14:02,176 --> 01:14:05,876
Well, it's like I said
in the letter. I--
1294
01:14:05,919 --> 01:14:08,661
You know, I was
reflecting on my life, and...
1295
01:14:08,705 --> 01:14:11,490
it wasn't you, it was me,
1296
01:14:11,534 --> 01:14:14,145
and... I was stupid.
1297
01:14:15,538 --> 01:14:21,065
That was basically
what's in the letter. That's the meat of it.
1298
01:14:22,936 --> 01:14:24,547
I wrote it so much better.
1299
01:14:26,374 --> 01:14:31,684
Laura, I was scared,
and, I mean...
1300
01:14:31,728 --> 01:14:34,034
you were real,
and it was a good thing,
1301
01:14:34,078 --> 01:14:37,168
and I w-- I wasn't used to
having good things in my life.
1302
01:14:37,211 --> 01:14:39,736
So I panicked.
1303
01:14:40,824 --> 01:14:44,480
And I've regretted it
every day of my life since.
1304
01:14:46,003 --> 01:14:48,745
You were the love of my life.
You still are.
1305
01:14:50,268 --> 01:14:51,704
It hasn't stopped.
1306
01:14:55,534 --> 01:14:57,318
So this is you
saying you're sorry?
1307
01:14:57,362 --> 01:15:01,322
Yes! Yes, incredibly sorry.
1308
01:15:01,366 --> 01:15:03,411
Nothing but sorry.
1309
01:15:05,109 --> 01:15:06,197
I believe you.
1310
01:15:07,546 --> 01:15:10,331
I forgave you, years ago.
1311
01:15:12,812 --> 01:15:14,684
But it's nice
to hear you say it.
1312
01:15:18,252 --> 01:15:19,689
You wanna come inside?
1313
01:15:19,732 --> 01:15:21,604
Yeah.
1314
01:15:30,395 --> 01:15:32,310
Can I get you anything?
1315
01:15:32,353 --> 01:15:34,530
I could really use a drink.
1316
01:15:34,573 --> 01:15:37,445
I can't help with that. I don't
have anything in the house.
1317
01:15:38,446 --> 01:15:39,970
Really?
1318
01:15:40,013 --> 01:15:41,841
All right.
1319
01:15:41,885 --> 01:15:45,541
Well, you do look fantastic.
You haven't aged a day.
1320
01:15:45,584 --> 01:15:46,629
Thank you.
1321
01:15:47,804 --> 01:15:50,502
Who is in the car?
1322
01:15:50,546 --> 01:15:52,504
Oh, that's David.
1323
01:15:52,548 --> 01:15:54,201
He's my son.
1324
01:15:55,681 --> 01:15:57,291
Uh...
1325
01:15:57,335 --> 01:16:00,207
listen, it's a long story,
but he's 21.
1326
01:16:00,251 --> 01:16:02,645
It was-- it was after us.
1327
01:16:02,688 --> 01:16:04,124
Did you marry her?
1328
01:16:05,125 --> 01:16:07,911
I-- I guess on paper.
1329
01:16:07,954 --> 01:16:10,609
But it didn't last long.
I didn't love her.
1330
01:16:13,569 --> 01:16:15,614
If that makes any sense.
1331
01:16:15,658 --> 01:16:21,054
Yeah. Um, so, you loved me, but
you ran out on our engagement.
1332
01:16:21,098 --> 01:16:23,274
Then you met a woman
who you didn't love,
1333
01:16:23,317 --> 01:16:26,190
so you married her
and had a baby with her.
1334
01:16:26,233 --> 01:16:31,195
Actually, she was pregnant
before I married her.
1335
01:16:31,238 --> 01:16:33,240
Well,
that makes everything better.
1336
01:16:33,284 --> 01:16:34,894
Please invite him in.
1337
01:16:42,685 --> 01:16:46,166
So, basically, I went with
the best and the safest option,
1338
01:16:46,210 --> 01:16:50,344
which was to drop out of
med school, and here we are.
1339
01:16:50,388 --> 01:16:53,826
Well, there's no one better
to learn comedy from than Jimmy.
1340
01:16:55,436 --> 01:16:59,702
- So what are your plans now?
- I got a show next Friday
1341
01:16:59,745 --> 01:17:02,661
at Magooby's Comedy Club
in town.
1342
01:17:02,705 --> 01:17:05,925
And, uh, I'm just gonna
get a motel till then.
1343
01:17:05,969 --> 01:17:08,014
And I'm heading
to New York soon.
1344
01:17:08,058 --> 01:17:10,060
- That's exciting.
- Yeah.
1345
01:17:10,103 --> 01:17:12,410
But, you know,
you should go see Jimmy's show.
1346
01:17:12,453 --> 01:17:14,934
It's been a long time
since I've seen his act.
1347
01:17:14,978 --> 01:17:16,457
Maybe I will.
1348
01:17:16,501 --> 01:17:18,721
We met at a comedy club.
Did you know that?
1349
01:17:18,764 --> 01:17:21,811
- No. No, really?
- Yeah.
1350
01:17:21,854 --> 01:17:26,859
I went up to him after his show
and told him how funny he was, and he asked me out.
1351
01:17:26,903 --> 01:17:29,383
I'm sure I'm the only girl
that's ever happened to.
1352
01:17:30,820 --> 01:17:34,301
You're the only one
that mattered.
1353
01:17:34,345 --> 01:17:37,696
Well, listen, David,
if you're sticking around...
1354
01:17:37,740 --> 01:17:39,959
You know, why don't
you guys just stay here?
1355
01:17:40,003 --> 01:17:42,701
I-- It's better than
wasting money on a motel,
1356
01:17:42,745 --> 01:17:45,530
and I've got plenty of room.
1357
01:17:45,573 --> 01:17:48,794
Yeah, that's--
that's fine with me. Thanks.
1358
01:17:50,361 --> 01:17:53,756
- Yeah.
- That's, uh-- that's really nice.
1359
01:17:53,799 --> 01:17:56,976
I'm gonna grab something
out of my car. I'll-- I'll be right back.
1360
01:18:01,807 --> 01:18:04,201
You really care about him,
don't you? - Yeah, I--
1361
01:18:04,244 --> 01:18:06,072
I haven't known him
that long, but...
1362
01:18:06,116 --> 01:18:07,508
yeah, I do a lot. Yeah.
1363
01:18:07,552 --> 01:18:09,815
How bad is it?
1364
01:18:09,859 --> 01:18:11,730
He doesn't look well.
1365
01:18:11,774 --> 01:18:17,388
I mean-- I mean,
he's dying, so... - Cirrhosis?
1366
01:18:17,431 --> 01:18:21,522
I mean, he-- he saw a doctor,
you know? That doctor, you know, must've told him that
1367
01:18:21,566 --> 01:18:23,873
if he doesn't quit drinking,
he's gonna die.
1368
01:18:23,916 --> 01:18:28,181
But he doesn't give a shit.
It's like he doesn't even care.
1369
01:18:28,225 --> 01:18:31,358
It's not that simple.
He's an addict.
1370
01:18:31,402 --> 01:18:33,534
Until he decides he wants
to do it for himself,
1371
01:18:33,578 --> 01:18:36,450
there's nothing you
or anyone else can do for him.
1372
01:18:40,411 --> 01:18:42,326
You, uh, get what you needed?
1373
01:18:42,369 --> 01:18:45,111
Yeah. Thanks.
1374
01:18:46,112 --> 01:18:49,550
So, why don't you guys
get cleaned up, and I'll make us some dinner?
1375
01:18:49,594 --> 01:18:51,248
- Great.
- Okay.
1376
01:18:52,684 --> 01:18:54,947
Well,
you guys must be having fun.
1377
01:18:54,991 --> 01:18:58,777
I used to love going on the road
with Jimmy, seeing America.
1378
01:18:58,821 --> 01:19:02,563
Oh, I-- I love it.
I mean, this is what I wanna do with my life, so.
1379
01:19:02,607 --> 01:19:05,175
I-- I'd love to see
your act some time.
1380
01:19:05,218 --> 01:19:10,006
As a matter of fact,
I actually just uploaded a set I did at Dad's show in Akron.
1381
01:19:10,049 --> 01:19:13,052
Um... you, uh--
you wanna see it?
1382
01:19:13,096 --> 01:19:16,752
- Yeah, that'd be great.
- Cool. Um, yeah, I'll go get my computer.
1383
01:19:21,800 --> 01:19:24,585
He is a good kid. I like him.
1384
01:19:25,630 --> 01:19:27,153
Yeah, he is.
1385
01:19:28,981 --> 01:19:32,332
You're real quiet.
What's going on?
1386
01:19:34,857 --> 01:19:37,598
It's just,
I don't know, overwhelming?
1387
01:19:37,642 --> 01:19:41,602
Just, you know,
being here with you. Again.
1388
01:19:43,387 --> 01:19:44,562
I get it.
1389
01:19:46,782 --> 01:19:49,610
I had a bad couple of years
after you left.
1390
01:19:49,654 --> 01:19:51,569
I got married too.
1391
01:19:51,612 --> 01:19:53,353
He was a good guy.
1392
01:19:54,746 --> 01:19:58,794
But I was dealing with
a lot of grief back then, and I got angry.
1393
01:20:00,143 --> 01:20:03,059
Angry at him
for being so decent.
1394
01:20:05,409 --> 01:20:07,672
Angry...
1395
01:20:07,715 --> 01:20:11,241
at him caring so much
when I couldn't.
1396
01:20:11,284 --> 01:20:14,592
That made me hate myself.
1397
01:20:14,635 --> 01:20:17,334
Pretty much climbed inside
a bottle of Merlot, and...
1398
01:20:18,944 --> 01:20:24,210
then I watched him struggle
and beg and try to fix me.
1399
01:20:24,254 --> 01:20:26,430
And eventually
I watched him leave.
1400
01:20:28,475 --> 01:20:29,825
I was by myself.
1401
01:20:30,869 --> 01:20:31,914
Alone.
1402
01:20:33,132 --> 01:20:34,742
That's when I hit my bottom.
1403
01:20:34,786 --> 01:20:37,963
Then I realized
I had two choices:
1404
01:20:39,573 --> 01:20:41,314
die inside that bottle,
1405
01:20:42,489 --> 01:20:44,317
or fight for my life.
1406
01:20:44,361 --> 01:20:46,537
I've been sober 15 years.
1407
01:20:47,494 --> 01:20:52,543
That's-- that's good.
1408
01:20:52,586 --> 01:20:55,676
I'm going to a meeting tomorrow.
Wanna come with me?
1409
01:20:55,720 --> 01:20:57,809
Uh...
1410
01:20:57,853 --> 01:21:02,205
I-- I don't think so. That's--
It's kind of off-brand for me.
1411
01:21:04,250 --> 01:21:07,863
It's just that
I think David and...
1412
01:21:07,906 --> 01:21:10,866
some other people might like
to have you around for a while.
1413
01:21:11,997 --> 01:21:13,129
Um...
1414
01:21:14,782 --> 01:21:17,350
uh, I'm gonna hit the bathroom.
1415
01:21:31,364 --> 01:21:33,889
Hey. Don't blow this.
She's really great.
1416
01:21:34,890 --> 01:21:35,934
Yeah...
1417
01:21:43,637 --> 01:21:44,725
All right.
1418
01:21:46,727 --> 01:21:50,906
So, uh, it's on its own browser.
1419
01:21:50,949 --> 01:21:53,343
- It's queued up?
- Yep. There it is. Okay.
1420
01:21:53,386 --> 01:21:55,954
...I knowI kinda look like a, uh,
1421
01:21:55,998 --> 01:21:58,261
John Cusackbefore he hit puberty...
1422
01:21:58,304 --> 01:22:02,352
That's good.
It's a good opener. - Appreciate it.
1423
01:22:02,395 --> 01:22:04,745
...I, uh-- I justdropped out of med school.
1424
01:22:04,789 --> 01:22:06,573
Kind of a stupid joke.
1425
01:22:06,617 --> 01:22:08,401
I like stupid.
1426
01:22:11,491 --> 01:22:12,753
Oh, good morning!
1427
01:22:12,797 --> 01:22:14,233
- Morning!
- How'd you sleep?
1428
01:22:14,277 --> 01:22:16,540
Great, yeah.
Thanks for letting us stay here.
1429
01:22:16,583 --> 01:22:19,978
My pleasure.
Is, uh, Jimmy awake?
1430
01:22:20,022 --> 01:22:22,198
Uh, yeah, I think
I heard him moving around.
1431
01:22:24,069 --> 01:22:26,550
- I hope you like waffles.
- Oh, yeah.
1432
01:22:26,593 --> 01:22:30,119
- So, New York is next?
- Yeah, yeah. I'm pretty excited.
1433
01:22:30,162 --> 01:22:33,296
Uh, got some friends out there,
so, you know, should be good.
1434
01:22:34,514 --> 01:22:37,387
I like New York. It's just
a little "big city" for me.
1435
01:22:37,430 --> 01:22:39,824
- Yeah.
- These days, I like things quieter.
1436
01:22:39,867 --> 01:22:41,695
Good morning, sleepyhead!
1437
01:22:41,739 --> 01:22:43,741
- Yeah...
- Can I make you some waffles?
1438
01:22:43,784 --> 01:22:46,570
Ugh. God, no. Uh...
1439
01:22:47,571 --> 01:22:49,312
just coffee if you got it.
1440
01:22:49,355 --> 01:22:52,358
- You still take it black?
- Good memory.
1441
01:22:53,403 --> 01:22:57,973
So, I took the day off work.
What would you guys like to do?
1442
01:22:58,974 --> 01:23:00,584
Why don't we hang out here?
1443
01:23:10,724 --> 01:23:11,812
"Mices"?
1444
01:23:13,727 --> 01:23:15,599
Yeah, like a lot of mice.
1445
01:23:16,992 --> 01:23:20,473
You know you can't add an "S"
to a word that's already plural.
1446
01:23:22,040 --> 01:23:24,564
All right, if you're
gonna be all technical,
1447
01:23:24,608 --> 01:23:28,133
then I ain't got shit.
1448
01:23:28,177 --> 01:23:32,355
Listen, why don't you guys
just play together? I'm gonna go lay down for a bit.
1449
01:23:41,103 --> 01:23:43,366
Okay! What do you got?
1450
01:23:48,588 --> 01:23:49,676
"Queeve"?
1451
01:23:52,114 --> 01:23:54,029
That's... not a word.
1452
01:23:54,072 --> 01:23:56,814
Oh, sure it is.
That's-- that's a medical term.
1453
01:23:56,857 --> 01:23:59,121
You are such a bullshitter!
1454
01:23:59,164 --> 01:24:02,211
All right, where's my phone?
I'm gonna look this up. Uh...
1455
01:24:05,083 --> 01:24:08,608
- That works!
- No, no, no. Um...
1456
01:24:08,652 --> 01:24:10,958
Where's my phone?
I'm gonna Google this.
1457
01:24:11,002 --> 01:24:13,135
Just admit it, you got nothing!
1458
01:24:13,178 --> 01:24:16,312
- Ow, my "queeve"!
- God.
1459
01:24:16,355 --> 01:24:17,704
Jimmy!
1460
01:24:19,532 --> 01:24:20,664
Jimmy?
1461
01:24:22,318 --> 01:24:23,362
Jimmy?
1462
01:24:27,758 --> 01:24:29,064
What are you doing?
1463
01:24:37,289 --> 01:24:38,595
I wanna stop.
1464
01:24:39,596 --> 01:24:41,076
I do. I just...
1465
01:24:42,686 --> 01:24:45,080
I wanna stop.
I just gotta figure out how.
1466
01:24:45,123 --> 01:24:48,909
Good!
We'll help you. Right, Laura?
1467
01:24:48,953 --> 01:24:50,650
I'll stay as long
as it takes, Dad.
1468
01:24:54,306 --> 01:24:55,351
You can do this.
1469
01:25:37,132 --> 01:25:41,353
Okay. Okay.
Doing good. All right.
1470
01:25:41,397 --> 01:25:44,051
- Okay, I'll take care of this.
- Yes, thank you.
1471
01:25:44,095 --> 01:25:46,967
Um, David,
why don't you get some rest?
1472
01:25:47,011 --> 01:25:51,058
We can do this in shifts
until he's out of danger.
1473
01:25:51,102 --> 01:25:54,236
Okay, but call me if
you need anything, all right? - Yep, I will.
1474
01:25:58,109 --> 01:26:01,112
All right.
It's okay. It's okay.
1475
01:26:01,156 --> 01:26:03,941
You...
1476
01:26:10,730 --> 01:26:12,079
Okay.
1477
01:26:16,867 --> 01:26:20,044
That's a good sign.
You got your appetite back.
1478
01:26:20,087 --> 01:26:22,002
Yeah, how-- how ya feeling?
1479
01:26:23,003 --> 01:26:24,875
Like shit.
1480
01:26:24,918 --> 01:26:28,531
So, that's an improvement.
1481
01:26:28,574 --> 01:26:34,101
Listen, I'm not good with
"thank yous," so I'm gonna skip all that, but, uh...
1482
01:26:34,145 --> 01:26:37,235
I know this couldn't
have been easy on you guys.
1483
01:26:37,279 --> 01:26:38,845
- It wasn't.
- It was terrible.
1484
01:26:38,889 --> 01:26:40,456
- The worst.
- Awful.
1485
01:26:40,499 --> 01:26:43,459
Thanks.
Starting to get some optimism,
1486
01:26:43,502 --> 01:26:44,982
and you're busting my balls.
1487
01:26:46,592 --> 01:26:48,638
You've got a long road
ahead of you.
1488
01:26:48,681 --> 01:26:50,901
But at least you're
out of physical danger.
1489
01:27:01,738 --> 01:27:04,219
And I'd like to thank
my family and my sponsor
1490
01:27:04,262 --> 01:27:07,134
for getting me to the point
that I'm at today. Thank you.
1491
01:27:09,311 --> 01:27:11,878
Thank you, Alexa.
You did a great job.
1492
01:27:11,922 --> 01:27:14,577
Would anybody else like to
come up and share this evening?
1493
01:27:15,839 --> 01:27:17,406
Yeah. Come on up, come on up.
1494
01:27:21,627 --> 01:27:25,631
Hey, keep it going for Greg,
ladies and gentlemen. -
1495
01:27:25,675 --> 01:27:29,287
Sorry, force of habit. Uh...
1496
01:27:29,331 --> 01:27:32,247
uh, my name's Jimmy,
and I'm an alcoholic.
1497
01:27:32,290 --> 01:27:36,338
- Hi, Jimmy.
- Yeah, it's strange that, uh,
1498
01:27:36,381 --> 01:27:41,125
I've used that as
an opening line on stage in comedy for a million years.
1499
01:27:42,039 --> 01:27:44,563
Honestly, it kind of
stings to say it for real
1500
01:27:44,607 --> 01:27:48,175
and not get the laugh.
But, um... -
1501
01:27:48,219 --> 01:27:51,135
I started drinking
as a teenager.
1502
01:27:51,178 --> 01:27:54,007
I grew up thinking
I was worthless, and...
1503
01:27:55,008 --> 01:27:58,360
when I found alcohol, I don't
think it changed it that much,
1504
01:27:58,403 --> 01:28:02,799
but it just made me not care
that I was a piece of shit.
1505
01:28:02,842 --> 01:28:05,149
You know,
it deadens your emotions.
1506
01:28:05,192 --> 01:28:08,674
Uh, which I thought
was a good thing.
1507
01:28:08,718 --> 01:28:14,289
Like that line from Pet Sematary
where the guy says, "Yeah, sometimes dead is better."
1508
01:28:14,332 --> 01:28:17,030
I believed that.
1509
01:28:17,074 --> 01:28:19,119
And I would lie to myself.
1510
01:28:19,163 --> 01:28:23,210
Uh, denial,
as I guess you guys could say.
1511
01:28:23,254 --> 01:28:27,998
I mean, I remember I would be--
You know, booze shakes so bad in the morning
1512
01:28:28,041 --> 01:28:32,829
that I would be white-knuckling
a breakfast sandwich and having to move my mouth to it
1513
01:28:32,872 --> 01:28:38,225
and still thinking, "I don't
have an alcohol problem. It's probably just a little bit
1514
01:28:38,269 --> 01:28:42,621
of Parkinson's disease going
on there. I'm fine." But, uh... -
1515
01:28:42,665 --> 01:28:47,887
I know this is gonna be
a lot of hard work, and I hope to be where you are someday.
1516
01:28:47,931 --> 01:28:49,541
Uh...
1517
01:28:49,585 --> 01:28:51,630
I just hate-- hate
saying "quitting."
1518
01:28:51,674 --> 01:28:55,112
I always thought of "quitting"
as a word of weakness, and...
1519
01:28:56,374 --> 01:28:58,985
I know now that
I'm not a weak person,
1520
01:28:59,029 --> 01:29:02,380
so instead of saying "I quit"
from now on-- for--
1521
01:29:02,424 --> 01:29:06,123
from now on, I'm just gonna say
"I retired undefeated."
1522
01:29:06,166 --> 01:29:09,387
So. Thank you,
and tip your waitresses.
1523
01:29:17,874 --> 01:29:23,227
You have no idea how it felt
to be that clearheaded on stage tonight.
1524
01:29:23,270 --> 01:29:27,971
I like that
sharing at an AA meeting is "on stage" for you.
1525
01:29:28,014 --> 01:29:31,061
- Well... I got some chuckles.
- Yeah, you did.
1526
01:29:32,932 --> 01:29:36,545
So, uh, how would you feel
if I told you that
1527
01:29:36,588 --> 01:29:42,725
now you're pretty much
my sole and only solitary reason for living?
1528
01:29:42,768 --> 01:29:45,641
Does that put too-- too much pressure on you?
1529
01:29:45,684 --> 01:29:48,165
Does that put you
in an awkward position?
1530
01:29:53,866 --> 01:29:56,216
Well... I'm, uh, going to bed.
1531
01:29:57,957 --> 01:30:00,743
- You say something?
- Nope.
1532
01:30:00,786 --> 01:30:01,961
Good night.
1533
01:30:05,661 --> 01:30:10,230
Yeah, you know,
I think maybe you should sleep in my room tonight.
1534
01:30:10,274 --> 01:30:12,102
For safety.
1535
01:30:13,451 --> 01:30:16,149
Yeah, all right.
If it's a safety issue.
1536
01:30:28,901 --> 01:30:32,296
Listen, I know that
couldn't have been easy on you.
1537
01:30:32,339 --> 01:30:34,472
It wasn't.
1538
01:30:37,519 --> 01:30:40,435
You don't by any chance
still have that ring I got you?
1539
01:30:45,440 --> 01:30:47,267
Do you mean...
1540
01:30:50,227 --> 01:30:51,663
this?
1541
01:30:52,795 --> 01:30:54,710
I think we should pawn it.
1542
01:30:54,753 --> 01:30:56,189
I thought about it.
1543
01:30:58,148 --> 01:31:02,761
Why don't we just consider this
the world's longest engagement?
1544
01:31:05,111 --> 01:31:06,809
It still fits.
1545
01:31:06,852 --> 01:31:08,941
It's a good sign.
1546
01:31:08,985 --> 01:31:10,465
We could do it right this time.
1547
01:31:11,988 --> 01:31:13,772
I'm a different person now.
1548
01:31:15,339 --> 01:31:18,168
- Than you were eight days ago?
- Oh, come on.
1549
01:31:20,953 --> 01:31:23,042
I know how this can go.
1550
01:31:23,086 --> 01:31:24,783
I'm not gonna get hurt again.
1551
01:31:24,827 --> 01:31:26,393
You won't.
1552
01:31:26,437 --> 01:31:27,656
I'm serious.
1553
01:31:29,179 --> 01:31:31,224
I don't wanna
be that person anymore.
1554
01:31:33,313 --> 01:31:35,577
Let's take it one day at a time.
1555
01:31:35,620 --> 01:31:37,666
I'm just so happy
you're here now.
1556
01:31:54,596 --> 01:31:56,119
- Jimmy!
- Mark.
1557
01:31:56,162 --> 01:31:57,686
It's been a long time!
1558
01:31:57,729 --> 01:31:59,775
- How are you, sir?
- Good. How you doing?
1559
01:31:59,818 --> 01:32:02,647
- Good.
- You're a little early, pal. We're not even open yet.
1560
01:32:02,691 --> 01:32:05,171
Trying to beat the paparazzi.
1561
01:32:05,215 --> 01:32:07,217
This is my son, David,
and, uh... - Hey, how you doing?
1562
01:32:07,260 --> 01:32:09,219
- Nice to meet you, man.
- ...my girlfriend, Laura.
1563
01:32:09,262 --> 01:32:12,918
Nice to meet ya.
So, uh, what are we drinking?
1564
01:32:12,962 --> 01:32:15,268
You know, just a--
just a bottle of water.
1565
01:32:15,312 --> 01:32:18,794
- "Water," yeah.
- Yeah. Yeah, just-- just water.
1566
01:32:18,837 --> 01:32:21,840
Who are you and what have you
done with the real Jimmy Quinn?
1567
01:32:23,450 --> 01:32:24,756
Just water.
1568
01:32:24,800 --> 01:32:25,844
Okay!
1569
01:32:26,802 --> 01:32:28,804
All right. A table?
1570
01:32:36,768 --> 01:32:38,640
Well, how you feeling?
1571
01:32:38,683 --> 01:32:40,772
Better once I'm on that stage.
1572
01:32:40,816 --> 01:32:42,687
Well, I'm excited to see you.
1573
01:32:42,731 --> 01:32:44,950
- It's really been too long.
- Yeah.
1574
01:32:45,951 --> 01:32:49,607
Hey, I-- I don't wanna beat
a dead horse with this, but...
1575
01:32:49,651 --> 01:32:55,613
thank you both again,
'cause I couldn't have done this without your support, and...
1576
01:32:55,657 --> 01:32:57,963
I was a dead man in my own eyes
a week ago,
1577
01:32:58,007 --> 01:33:01,053
and... here we are, so.
1578
01:33:01,097 --> 01:33:03,665
And you! I just wanted to say...
1579
01:33:05,101 --> 01:33:07,407
you're everything
I could've wanted in a son,
1580
01:33:07,451 --> 01:33:11,760
and I'm really sorry I wasn't
there to watch you grow up.
1581
01:33:11,803 --> 01:33:14,110
But I was really
hoping for a girl.
1582
01:33:17,287 --> 01:33:18,375
Okay.
1583
01:33:19,768 --> 01:33:22,292
Okay, you guys ready
for your headliner? -
1584
01:33:22,335 --> 01:33:25,469
Come on! You could do
better than that! You guys ready for your headliner?
1585
01:33:25,512 --> 01:33:29,473
There you go! You guys are in for a real treat.
1586
01:33:29,516 --> 01:33:32,215
This guy has been entertaining
audiences for over 30 years.
1587
01:33:32,258 --> 01:33:35,914
I'm talking about the legendary
Road Dog himself, Jimmy Quinn!
1588
01:33:42,921 --> 01:33:45,315
Vince! Keep it going for Vince!
1589
01:33:50,494 --> 01:33:53,715
Weird gynecological instrument.
1590
01:33:53,758 --> 01:33:57,370
Yeah. Hey, my name's Jimmy, and I'm an alcoholic.
1591
01:33:59,764 --> 01:34:04,639
Actually, I-- I quit
drinking a week ago. Uh...
1592
01:34:06,075 --> 01:34:10,427
So, uh--
But I'm still an alcoholic, so the jokes should still work.
1593
01:34:10,470 --> 01:34:14,170
Uh... yeah, I used to say that,
uh...
1594
01:34:15,737 --> 01:34:18,914
yeah, I lost more friends
to AA than, uh--
1595
01:34:18,957 --> 01:34:22,918
than St. Jude's did
to dead kids with cancer.
1596
01:34:25,137 --> 01:34:29,359
You know,
you see that chip on their ring, and it's like, uh--
1597
01:34:29,402 --> 01:34:34,843
it's like seeing a toe tag
on their dead corpse. -
1598
01:34:34,886 --> 01:34:38,934
My doctor told me that
I had to quit-- quit drinking 'cause, uh...
1599
01:34:38,977 --> 01:34:41,110
And I told him, you know, uh--
1600
01:34:41,153 --> 01:34:47,594
You know, uh, I prefer to
think of it as, uh, I retired--
1601
01:34:48,726 --> 01:34:52,643
Ah, I-- I fucked up the--
fucked the punchline up.
1602
01:34:52,687 --> 01:34:55,994
Maybe that's what I should quit.
Fucking up punchlines.
1603
01:34:56,038 --> 01:34:58,518
Can I get a sponsor for that?
1604
01:34:58,562 --> 01:35:02,784
It's supposed to be,
"I've-- I didn't quit drinking, I retired undefeated."
1605
01:35:02,827 --> 01:35:06,701
Which... probably be funnier
if I didn't fuck it up.
1606
01:35:06,744 --> 01:35:07,789
Uh...
1607
01:35:11,270 --> 01:35:14,360
I had, uh, two ladies walk out
of my show last night 'cause--
1608
01:35:14,404 --> 01:35:19,322
uh, complaining that I was
drunk on stage-- uh, before.
1609
01:35:19,365 --> 01:35:23,718
Like, before I quit drinking.
They walked out of the show, and they were complaining
1610
01:35:23,761 --> 01:35:26,111
that I was-- you know,
'cause I was drunk.
1611
01:35:26,155 --> 01:35:30,463
And I'm like, I'm not--
I'm not driving a bus, you know?
1612
01:35:30,507 --> 01:35:32,552
I'm a comedian.
1613
01:35:32,596 --> 01:35:37,906
Bus...
1614
01:35:37,949 --> 01:35:40,430
You guys want some easy comedy?
1615
01:35:40,473 --> 01:35:42,345
What's the problem?
1616
01:35:42,388 --> 01:35:43,955
Uh...
1617
01:35:45,261 --> 01:35:48,481
Yeah,
here's a-- here's an impression of me when I start in comedy.
1618
01:35:56,533 --> 01:35:59,362
It's supposed to
sound like a bong. But you--
1619
01:36:03,018 --> 01:36:06,543
Bring back the last guy! - Yeah!
1620
01:36:06,586 --> 01:36:09,589
You know what? That's-- Fine.
1621
01:36:09,633 --> 01:36:11,766
You know, it's not a bad idea.
1622
01:36:11,809 --> 01:36:16,988
Vince, why don't you, uh,
control this sinking ship?
1623
01:36:17,032 --> 01:36:20,209
I'm sorry.
This was a fucking mistake.
1624
01:36:26,868 --> 01:36:28,957
Okay!
Well, that was legendary.
1625
01:36:35,267 --> 01:36:37,313
Hey, a-- a whiskey.
1626
01:36:37,356 --> 01:36:40,664
- What the fuck was that?
- I'm gonna fix it in the second show.
1627
01:36:40,707 --> 01:36:42,666
Mark, I-- I swear to you.
1628
01:36:44,407 --> 01:36:46,191
You better.
1629
01:37:13,436 --> 01:37:16,352
- What the hell are you doing?
- What does it look like?
1630
01:37:18,397 --> 01:37:21,357
You had one bad show! Just--
You gotta give it some time!
1631
01:37:22,314 --> 01:37:24,229
Did you see that?
1632
01:37:24,273 --> 01:37:26,275
It was a fucking embarrassment.
1633
01:37:26,318 --> 01:37:29,844
That wasn't me up there.
This is what I do, David.
1634
01:37:29,887 --> 01:37:31,976
This is who I am, and...
1635
01:37:32,020 --> 01:37:33,499
if I can't have that,
1636
01:37:33,543 --> 01:37:35,980
the rest of it
doesn't mean shit.
1637
01:37:36,024 --> 01:37:38,853
I'm never gonna feel
that way on stage again.
1638
01:37:41,159 --> 01:37:42,639
Mom was right about you.
1639
01:37:42,682 --> 01:37:44,902
You hurt everyone
who cares about you,
1640
01:37:44,946 --> 01:37:46,861
'cause you don't know
what it's like to care.
1641
01:37:48,297 --> 01:37:50,865
I'm taking Laura home,
and I'm leaving tonight.
1642
01:37:50,908 --> 01:37:52,867
And you're never
seeing me again.
1643
01:37:52,910 --> 01:37:54,216
Bye!
1644
01:37:58,002 --> 01:37:59,438
Thanks for the lessons.
1645
01:38:37,781 --> 01:38:40,175
Is that your phone?
1646
01:38:41,437 --> 01:38:43,439
Hold on. Let me take this.
1647
01:38:46,355 --> 01:38:47,878
Ross Daniels.
1648
01:38:47,922 --> 01:38:51,621
Ross! It's your old pal Jimmy.
1649
01:38:55,407 --> 01:38:57,888
You got a lot of
fuckin' nerve calling me.
1650
01:38:58,933 --> 01:39:03,111
Hey, before you get started,
listen, I've-- I fucked up.
1651
01:39:04,112 --> 01:39:07,898
You were a really good friend to
me, and what I did was shitty.
1652
01:39:09,378 --> 01:39:13,034
But if it's any consolation,
I-- I did stop you
1653
01:39:13,077 --> 01:39:16,515
from marrying a girl
that'd sleep with a guy like me.
1654
01:39:16,559 --> 01:39:18,648
You sorry piece of shit.
1655
01:39:18,691 --> 01:39:22,130
Listen to me. If you're calling
to try and get on the show,
1656
01:39:22,173 --> 01:39:26,221
let me tell you,
it'll be a cold day in hell before I let that happen.
1657
01:39:26,264 --> 01:39:29,876
Goodbye. And go fuck yourself!
1658
01:39:29,920 --> 01:39:31,400
Ross, I'm dyin'.
1659
01:39:33,054 --> 01:39:34,098
What?
1660
01:39:35,621 --> 01:39:38,233
Yeah, my liver's blown out.
1661
01:39:38,276 --> 01:39:39,886
Big surprise, huh?
1662
01:39:39,930 --> 01:39:44,152
I'm-- I'm dyin'.
1663
01:39:44,195 --> 01:39:46,545
If you expect me
to feel bad for you,
1664
01:39:46,589 --> 01:39:48,504
you called the wrong place.
1665
01:39:49,548 --> 01:39:51,637
I get it. I-- I don't blame you.
1666
01:39:51,681 --> 01:39:56,207
I just needed to say
that I'm sorry and that I regret it, and...
1667
01:39:57,643 --> 01:40:00,733
and that's not
the only reason I'm calling.
1668
01:40:00,777 --> 01:40:03,171
You remember my son, David?
1669
01:40:04,215 --> 01:40:06,565
You mean the kid you ran out on?
1670
01:40:06,609 --> 01:40:11,092
Yeah. Well, he's 21 now,
and guess what?
1671
01:40:11,135 --> 01:40:13,355
He's a stand-up comedian.
1672
01:40:13,398 --> 01:40:17,837
And, uh, I'm telling you,
Ross, the kid's funny.
1673
01:40:19,361 --> 01:40:21,450
You-- Listen to me.
1674
01:40:21,493 --> 01:40:26,455
Whatever you think about me,
I-- I take it. I deserve it.
1675
01:40:26,498 --> 01:40:28,848
But you know that I know funny.
1676
01:40:29,936 --> 01:40:32,635
And, uh, I just want you
to take a look at him.
1677
01:40:32,678 --> 01:40:35,638
His name's Dave Moranto.
1678
01:40:35,681 --> 01:40:39,555
He's in New York.
He's got a set up on YouTube.
1679
01:40:39,598 --> 01:40:43,341
Uh, we don't talk anymore,
but...
1680
01:40:43,385 --> 01:40:48,085
And he doesn't know
that I'm calling you, and I'd prefer he doesn't know.
1681
01:40:48,129 --> 01:40:49,260
And...
1682
01:40:51,306 --> 01:40:52,829
and that's it.
1683
01:40:55,092 --> 01:40:57,921
And Ross, you know...
1684
01:40:57,964 --> 01:41:01,707
try to remember
some of the laughs we had.
1685
01:41:01,751 --> 01:41:05,494
I'd rather you remember me
like that than,
1686
01:41:05,537 --> 01:41:08,932
you know, over some
bullshit transgression.
1687
01:41:15,982 --> 01:41:17,071
Jimmy?
1688
01:42:13,736 --> 01:42:15,912
Oh, shit. What time is it?
1689
01:42:17,696 --> 01:42:18,784
Can I...
1690
01:42:43,418 --> 01:42:44,854
Hey, comedian.
1691
01:42:46,421 --> 01:42:49,685
You're not here
to drink or watch TV.
1692
01:42:50,860 --> 01:42:52,949
Come on. You're up.
1693
01:43:32,249 --> 01:43:38,995
♪ Now the time has comeTo say goodbye ♪
1694
01:43:39,038 --> 01:43:45,393
♪ I'm sorry for the timesI made you cry ♪
1695
01:43:45,436 --> 01:43:52,008
♪ But there's one thing thatI wish on my behalf ♪
1696
01:43:53,227 --> 01:43:55,446
♪ Remember me ♪
1697
01:43:55,490 --> 01:44:01,104
♪ For how I made you laugh ♪
1698
01:44:06,631 --> 01:44:10,461
♪ Don't dwell onMy transgressions ♪
1699
01:44:10,505 --> 01:44:13,682
♪ And my selfish ways ♪
1700
01:44:13,725 --> 01:44:19,818
♪ Try instead rememberingBrighter days ♪
1701
01:44:19,862 --> 01:44:25,259
♪ Because I hope thatFor my epitaph ♪
1702
01:44:26,869 --> 01:44:29,480
♪ You'll think of me ♪
1703
01:44:29,524 --> 01:44:34,833
♪ And how I made you laugh ♪
1704
01:44:36,835 --> 01:44:40,274
♪ Time goes by so fast ♪
1705
01:44:40,317 --> 01:44:43,755
♪ And today becomes the past ♪
1706
01:44:43,799 --> 01:44:46,584
♪ The only thing to last ♪
1707
01:44:46,628 --> 01:44:51,372
♪ Is what we remember ♪
1708
01:44:55,854 --> 01:45:02,252
♪ So now it's time to travelDown that lonesome road ♪
1709
01:45:02,296 --> 01:45:08,563
♪ Thank you for the loveYou always showed ♪
1710
01:45:08,606 --> 01:45:14,351
♪ Though I often strayed farFrom that righteous path ♪
1711
01:45:15,613 --> 01:45:18,094
♪ Remember me ♪
1712
01:45:18,137 --> 01:45:25,057
♪ For how I made you laugh ♪
1713
01:45:25,101 --> 01:45:28,017
♪ Remember me ♪
1714
01:45:28,060 --> 01:45:34,937
♪ For how I made you laugh ♪
119698
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