All language subtitles for Rick.and.Morty.S07E01.WEB

af Afrikaans
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic Download
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bn Bengali
bs Bosnian
bg Bulgarian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified) Download
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional) Download
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English Download
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
tl Filipino
fi Finnish Download
fr French Download
fy Frisian
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek Download
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew Download
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
km Khmer
ko Korean Download
ku Kurdish (Kurmanji)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Lao
la Latin
lv Latvian
lt Lithuanian
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay Download
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
ne Nepali
no Norwegian
ps Pashto
fa Persian Download
pl Polish Download
pt Portuguese Download
pa Punjabi
ro Romanian
ru Russian Download
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
st Sesotho
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhala
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish Download
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish Download
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
te Telugu
th Thai Download
tr Turkish
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese Download
cy Welsh
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
or Odia (Oriya)
rw Kinyarwanda
tk Turkmen
tt Tatar
ug Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:05,605 --> 00:00:07,507 Any clue when our houseguest 2 00:00:07,540 --> 00:00:08,742 is finally gonna leave? 3 00:00:08,775 --> 00:00:10,311 It'd be nice to have the living room back. 4 00:00:10,344 --> 00:00:11,611 I keep tripping on all his top hats. 5 00:00:11,645 --> 00:00:13,446 He's always messing with my TiVo! 6 00:00:13,480 --> 00:00:15,649 It's an antique, the buttons are fragile! 7 00:00:15,682 --> 00:00:17,651 Big surprise that Dad's avoiding all this. 8 00:00:17,684 --> 00:00:19,452 Guys, he's a family friend. 9 00:00:19,486 --> 00:00:20,754 He can stay as long as he needs. 10 00:00:20,787 --> 00:00:22,889 Hey, so I just sold some drugs 11 00:00:22,924 --> 00:00:24,491 to the weird little dude in there. 12 00:00:24,524 --> 00:00:25,625 He said you had cash? 13 00:00:25,659 --> 00:00:27,494 Oh, you kids in school? 14 00:00:27,527 --> 00:00:29,263 You having trouble focusing? Okay, that's it! 15 00:00:29,297 --> 00:00:30,430 Morty, find your grandfather while I go 16 00:00:30,463 --> 00:00:31,631 talk to our houseguest. 17 00:00:31,665 --> 00:00:32,899 Jerry, pay the dealer. 18 00:00:32,934 --> 00:00:35,102 Yeah, I prefer the term "pharmacist." 19 00:00:35,136 --> 00:00:37,038 So do they! 20 00:00:37,071 --> 00:00:38,272 Any chance you have-- 21 00:00:38,306 --> 00:00:41,641 Sorry, I left my wallet in space. 22 00:00:41,675 --> 00:00:43,311 Are you leaving to get it? 23 00:00:44,778 --> 00:00:46,880 Mr. Poopybutthole, this has gone far enough. 24 00:00:46,914 --> 00:00:49,582 We have been really cool to you in your time of need. 25 00:00:49,616 --> 00:00:52,286 I agree, Beth. 26 00:00:52,320 --> 00:00:54,888 I'm a pieeeece of garbage. 27 00:00:54,922 --> 00:00:55,990 Can you boost me up 28 00:00:56,023 --> 00:00:58,392 so I can hook my belt to the ceiling faaaaan? 29 00:00:58,426 --> 00:00:59,961 We don't have a ceiling fan. 30 00:00:59,994 --> 00:01:02,930 Oo weee, is that why it's so hooot? 31 00:01:02,964 --> 00:01:05,832 They're not expensivvve. 32 00:01:05,865 --> 00:01:09,003 Bet you didn't expect to see me in a cold open, huh? 33 00:01:09,036 --> 00:01:12,406 Looks like I've taken another turn for the worse. 34 00:01:12,440 --> 00:01:14,474 It all started when Beth shot me. 35 00:01:14,507 --> 00:01:16,676 I said I was sorry! I know... 36 00:01:16,710 --> 00:01:18,712 It tore you up inside... 37 00:01:18,745 --> 00:01:21,215 Like a bullet. It was an accident! 38 00:01:21,248 --> 00:01:25,419 Anyway, then I got fired from my joooob, my wife left me, 39 00:01:25,453 --> 00:01:28,855 I broke both my leeegs, failed the bar exam. 40 00:01:28,888 --> 00:01:31,558 Ooo wee, things went downhill from there. 41 00:01:31,591 --> 00:01:34,561 So I've been crashing with the Smiths for a while. 42 00:01:34,594 --> 00:01:36,629 Ooo wee, I'm Mr. Pooooopybutthole 43 00:01:36,663 --> 00:01:40,001 and this is "Rick and Morty" Seeeeason 7. 44 00:02:14,101 --> 00:02:16,370 Hey, buddy. B-brought you a coffee. 45 00:02:16,404 --> 00:02:17,771 I can synthesize coffee. 46 00:02:17,804 --> 00:02:19,273 You don't need to make excuses to come see me -- 47 00:02:19,306 --> 00:02:21,976 Yeah, I knew you'd say that, so I didn't even bring a cup. 48 00:02:22,009 --> 00:02:23,411 Any progress? 49 00:02:23,444 --> 00:02:25,513 Yes, Morty, I found the version of me that killed my wife. 50 00:02:25,545 --> 00:02:27,081 You just missed it. Okay, I get it. 51 00:02:27,114 --> 00:02:29,582 I had a big sword fight with him on top of Hoover Dam. 52 00:02:29,616 --> 00:02:31,618 He fell and landed on a sharp spike, 53 00:02:31,651 --> 00:02:33,220 and then whispered, "Thank you," like a werewolf. 54 00:02:33,254 --> 00:02:34,788 I was asking to be polite. 55 00:02:34,821 --> 00:02:37,291 The family wants you upstairs to deal with Mr. Poopybutthole. 56 00:02:37,324 --> 00:02:38,959 It's finally time, huh? 57 00:02:38,993 --> 00:02:41,628 Well, lucky for you guys, I know how to make someone leave. 58 00:02:41,661 --> 00:02:44,498 Family, I present to you, Robo-Ghost. 59 00:02:44,532 --> 00:02:46,400 Rick! Your plan is to scare him away? 60 00:02:46,434 --> 00:02:48,202 Avoidance much? I'm listening. 61 00:02:48,235 --> 00:02:49,937 Assembling body. 62 00:02:52,605 --> 00:02:55,109 Activating sentience. 63 00:02:56,277 --> 00:02:58,845 Uploading business. 64 00:03:00,181 --> 00:03:02,715 Unfinished business detected. 65 00:03:02,749 --> 00:03:04,351 Terminating body. 66 00:03:10,458 --> 00:03:13,626 Okay. I need to make gravity part of its finished business 67 00:03:13,660 --> 00:03:15,496 and leave floors unfinished. 68 00:03:15,529 --> 00:03:16,763 Starting over. 69 00:03:16,796 --> 00:03:18,332 Dad, you can't keep putting this off. 70 00:03:18,365 --> 00:03:19,467 You're doing an intervention with us. 71 00:03:19,500 --> 00:03:20,633 Nope. Then we're sticking 72 00:03:20,667 --> 00:03:22,069 Poopybutthole downstairs with you. 73 00:03:22,103 --> 00:03:23,204 What is this? 74 00:03:23,237 --> 00:03:24,804 I-Is this an intervention of me not intervening? 75 00:03:24,838 --> 00:03:26,540 Y-You know this can't make the concept work, 76 00:03:26,574 --> 00:03:28,008 not comedically or clinically. 77 00:03:28,042 --> 00:03:29,809 Its success rate is 10% in both areas. 78 00:03:29,843 --> 00:03:31,579 Then you have to help him on your own. 79 00:03:31,611 --> 00:03:33,380 And not with a ghost. 80 00:03:34,982 --> 00:03:36,683 Oo, that -- that's interesting. 81 00:03:36,716 --> 00:03:38,552 You kind of gave him a little power by mentioning him. 82 00:03:38,586 --> 00:03:42,022 There's a lot of science to unpack about ghosts -- 83 00:03:42,056 --> 00:03:44,691 After I talk to my friend. 84 00:03:44,724 --> 00:03:46,293 He's in the living room, Rick. 85 00:03:46,327 --> 00:03:47,928 I'm not doing this by myself! 86 00:03:47,962 --> 00:03:49,696 Oh, so you're going to have an intervention? 87 00:03:49,729 --> 00:03:51,232 No. I'm going to get some friends 88 00:03:51,265 --> 00:03:52,933 to help me talk to a friend, and you'd know the difference 89 00:03:52,967 --> 00:03:54,701 if you weren't stupid and had friends. 90 00:03:54,734 --> 00:03:56,337 You're mean! Dad! 91 00:03:56,370 --> 00:03:57,605 Pick your battles, honey. Ha ha! 92 00:03:57,637 --> 00:03:59,706 Yeah you, Summer. 93 00:03:59,739 --> 00:04:01,442 God damn it. Your portal closed. 94 00:04:01,475 --> 00:04:02,842 Oh, did it? 95 00:04:02,876 --> 00:04:04,545 Have an intervention, or we'll intervention you, 96 00:04:04,578 --> 00:04:06,347 you bunch of stupids. 97 00:04:07,982 --> 00:04:10,551 Gearhead! Buddy! Listen. 98 00:04:10,584 --> 00:04:12,319 We gotta help Mr. Poopybutthole. 99 00:04:12,353 --> 00:04:13,587 He's in a bad place. 100 00:04:13,621 --> 00:04:15,289 Well, that sounds like an intervention, 101 00:04:15,322 --> 00:04:17,591 which Gearhead no Likehead. 102 00:04:17,625 --> 00:04:19,659 It's not an intervention. And you owe me. 103 00:04:19,692 --> 00:04:21,996 Okay, fine, but now I need a drink. 104 00:04:22,029 --> 00:04:23,964 Make it to go and make it two. 105 00:04:24,999 --> 00:04:26,733 Rick, you son of a squanch! 106 00:04:26,766 --> 00:04:28,768 Squanch! Told you he wasn't dead. 107 00:04:28,801 --> 00:04:30,171 We squanching? 108 00:04:30,204 --> 00:04:31,771 A little. We need to have a hang with Poopybutthole 109 00:04:31,804 --> 00:04:33,873 and talk to him about -- His drinking. 110 00:04:33,908 --> 00:04:35,943 Us? Not without a squanch. 111 00:04:35,976 --> 00:04:38,279 I'd love one if you're pouring. Make it three. 112 00:04:38,312 --> 00:04:41,748 You left a Gromflomite femur in the compost. 113 00:04:41,781 --> 00:04:43,951 Your human side is passionate but careless. 114 00:04:43,984 --> 00:04:46,520 I also found your Federation hit list -- 115 00:04:46,554 --> 00:04:48,055 Ugh! Don't go through my stuff! 116 00:04:48,088 --> 00:04:50,124 This place is worse than prison. 117 00:04:55,095 --> 00:04:57,431 Rick. BP! 118 00:04:57,464 --> 00:04:58,898 It's been a minute. 119 00:04:58,933 --> 00:05:01,435 Is...someone here? Birddaughter. 120 00:05:01,468 --> 00:05:02,869 You found her. Yes. 121 00:05:02,903 --> 00:05:05,639 She was imprisoned in a femme fatale training camp. 122 00:05:05,673 --> 00:05:07,041 That's great! 123 00:05:07,074 --> 00:05:08,875 L-Let's go celebrate with our closest friends 124 00:05:08,909 --> 00:05:12,680 by encouraging Poopybutthole to dial back his drinking! 125 00:05:12,712 --> 00:05:15,683 Suspect. But I find fatherhood exhausting 126 00:05:15,715 --> 00:05:16,849 and would like to show my daughter 127 00:05:16,883 --> 00:05:18,619 what real selfishness looks like. 128 00:05:18,652 --> 00:05:21,854 Perfect! Now, do we know anyone sober? 129 00:05:23,591 --> 00:05:25,593 Have you been drinking? On a Thursday? 130 00:05:25,626 --> 00:05:26,793 He seems ideal. 131 00:05:26,826 --> 00:05:28,963 Waah! So, where to? 132 00:05:28,996 --> 00:05:31,198 A coffee shop? No. He'll know something's up. 133 00:05:31,232 --> 00:05:32,865 Yeah! and I'm not squanching just coffee! 134 00:05:32,899 --> 00:05:34,435 Let's squanch him to a bar! 135 00:05:34,468 --> 00:05:35,970 It would undercut our messaging. 136 00:05:36,003 --> 00:05:38,038 So it is an intervention. No! 137 00:05:38,072 --> 00:05:39,573 We're not asking anybody to stop drinking 138 00:05:39,607 --> 00:05:41,041 because we're not hypocrites or squares, 139 00:05:41,075 --> 00:05:42,875 we're just concerned friends. 140 00:05:42,910 --> 00:05:46,046 Then we can at least do it at a place with a bar. 141 00:05:46,080 --> 00:05:49,016 Look, I think if it has food, it's allowed to have a bar. 142 00:05:53,087 --> 00:05:55,422 Appreciate you guys taking me out. 143 00:05:55,456 --> 00:05:56,856 It's been a rough week. 144 00:05:56,889 --> 00:06:00,060 Amy's taking pilaaaates from a guy named Guy. 145 00:06:00,094 --> 00:06:02,930 You've been surveilling your ex-wife? 146 00:06:02,963 --> 00:06:04,965 Oooweeee, not with the restraining order! 147 00:06:04,999 --> 00:06:07,401 I hired a Predator to follow her around. 148 00:06:07,434 --> 00:06:09,069 You can hire Predators? 149 00:06:09,103 --> 00:06:11,238 Yeah, they're cheap because they live for the hunt -- 150 00:06:11,272 --> 00:06:13,207 you just have to pay 'em to not kill your target, 151 00:06:13,240 --> 00:06:16,377 and if they stay cloaked, there's no licensing fee. 152 00:06:16,410 --> 00:06:17,645 Welcome to You's! 153 00:06:17,678 --> 00:06:19,947 - My name is Mart, and... - you! 154 00:06:19,980 --> 00:06:23,317 See, at You's, we lightly tease our customers. 155 00:06:23,350 --> 00:06:24,518 Oh, this is fun! 156 00:06:24,551 --> 00:06:26,453 What do you know, Gilligan? 157 00:06:26,487 --> 00:06:27,721 Nice! 158 00:06:27,755 --> 00:06:29,189 Look at this depressed pencil eraser. 159 00:06:29,223 --> 00:06:32,059 Did some middle schooler stick you up a cat's ass? 160 00:06:32,092 --> 00:06:34,028 I bet you had everything and you watched it 161 00:06:34,061 --> 00:06:36,297 slip through your powerless little fingers 162 00:06:36,330 --> 00:06:37,731 like the sands of time. 163 00:06:37,765 --> 00:06:39,333 Be right back to take your order, folks, 164 00:06:39,366 --> 00:06:41,402 or should I say, s! 165 00:06:41,435 --> 00:06:44,138 Perhaps this wasn't the best place to do this, Rick. 166 00:06:44,171 --> 00:06:45,838 What are you talkin' about? 167 00:06:45,872 --> 00:06:48,742 This is a great place to celebrate my birthdaaay! 168 00:06:48,776 --> 00:06:50,911 Birthday-- Birthday-- 169 00:06:50,944 --> 00:06:53,447 Birthday-- Birthday-- 170 00:06:53,480 --> 00:06:55,382 birthday-- birthday-- 171 00:06:55,416 --> 00:06:56,883 Your birthday? Ooo weee. 172 00:06:56,917 --> 00:06:59,086 I can't believe y'all remembered! 173 00:06:59,119 --> 00:07:00,454 I was at the end of my rope, 174 00:07:00,487 --> 00:07:03,791 thinking I'd worn out aaall my welcomeees. 175 00:07:03,823 --> 00:07:05,926 Thanks for doing all this, Riiick! 176 00:07:05,959 --> 00:07:07,628 O- of course, Mr. PB. 177 00:07:07,661 --> 00:07:08,762 What are friends for? 178 00:07:08,796 --> 00:07:10,264 Heard we got a birthday boy?! 179 00:07:10,297 --> 00:07:12,099 Yeeeah, but please don't sing or -- 180 00:07:12,132 --> 00:07:13,000 Yah! 181 00:07:13,033 --> 00:07:14,401 you, head! 182 00:07:15,369 --> 00:07:16,804 Haha, yeah. 183 00:07:16,836 --> 00:07:18,772 That sure is a smart hat... 184 00:07:18,806 --> 00:07:21,809 Because even my son Poopy Jr. hates me! 185 00:07:21,841 --> 00:07:22,943 Ooooweehehehe! 186 00:07:22,976 --> 00:07:24,511 I can relate. 187 00:07:24,545 --> 00:07:26,347 Birddaughter is a total bitch. 188 00:07:26,380 --> 00:07:28,215 If you're a parent, you can say that. 189 00:07:28,248 --> 00:07:29,583 Weeeell. 190 00:07:29,616 --> 00:07:32,219 Should we do shooots? 191 00:07:32,252 --> 00:07:33,954 Rick? 192 00:07:33,987 --> 00:07:35,823 Let's get riggity-riggity-wrecked! 193 00:07:35,855 --> 00:07:37,524 ♪ I-I-I take a shot ♪ 194 00:07:37,558 --> 00:07:39,426 ♪ Do a pop, blow a line, huff turpentine ♪ 195 00:07:39,460 --> 00:07:42,162 ♪ Get wrecked, text your ex, fight a cop, feeling fine ♪ 196 00:07:42,196 --> 00:07:43,530 ♪ Punch your dick, turn some tricks ♪ 197 00:07:43,564 --> 00:07:44,765 ♪ Quit your job, buy a dog ♪ 198 00:07:44,798 --> 00:07:46,100 ♪ Have two beers, then ten more ♪ 199 00:07:46,133 --> 00:07:47,634 ♪ Pop a pill and meet the floor ♪ 200 00:07:50,337 --> 00:07:53,006 That one's not my bellybutton. 201 00:07:53,040 --> 00:07:54,541 Well, what is it? 202 00:08:01,348 --> 00:08:02,516 Oo weee! 203 00:08:03,684 --> 00:08:04,818 Whoa! 204 00:08:04,852 --> 00:08:07,321 -Whoo-hoo! -Hold on, everyone! 205 00:08:07,354 --> 00:08:08,389 Whoa! Ah! 206 00:08:08,422 --> 00:08:10,224 -Oh, God! -Oh, woah! 207 00:08:10,257 --> 00:08:12,860 I can't breathe! I can't breathe! 208 00:08:12,892 --> 00:08:13,861 Is there a restroom?! 209 00:08:13,893 --> 00:08:15,229 At the front. 210 00:08:16,463 --> 00:08:18,898 Oh, it was a bad idea! Oooo weee! 211 00:08:18,932 --> 00:08:20,768 -Yeah, ha ha! -Oh, man! 212 00:08:23,370 --> 00:08:24,705 Oooo weee! 213 00:08:26,607 --> 00:08:29,076 Whoo! Aah! 214 00:08:29,109 --> 00:08:31,445 Oh it's happening! 215 00:08:31,478 --> 00:08:33,614 Honey rave! 216 00:08:33,647 --> 00:08:35,682 Bee time, baby! 217 00:08:35,716 --> 00:08:37,618 Whoa, what world is this? 218 00:08:37,651 --> 00:08:39,386 We're on Earth. How do you know? 219 00:08:39,420 --> 00:08:41,655 Because I think that is Hugh Jackman. 220 00:08:44,725 --> 00:08:45,692 Oh it is. 221 00:08:45,726 --> 00:08:47,161 Hey, Jackman! 222 00:08:47,194 --> 00:08:49,830 Makes sense he recognizes me. We both hosted the Oscars. 223 00:08:49,863 --> 00:08:51,098 It's a pretty exclusive club. 224 00:08:51,131 --> 00:08:52,800 Listen, guys, don't make this tacky. 225 00:08:52,833 --> 00:08:54,968 Nobody call him "Wolverine." Just treat him like a regular -- 226 00:08:55,002 --> 00:08:56,905 Gene! Small world, mate! 227 00:08:56,937 --> 00:08:59,173 Hugh! Hugh married my cousin. 228 00:08:59,206 --> 00:09:02,176 Which I guess makes him a Wolver-ine-law. 229 00:09:02,209 --> 00:09:05,078 Ha ha! That is fantastic! 230 00:09:05,112 --> 00:09:06,346 Hey, didn't you host the Oscars? 231 00:09:06,380 --> 00:09:08,282 Yeah, I, uh -- Alright, alright, listen. 232 00:09:08,315 --> 00:09:09,883 Now, I'm not assuming you guys want to party 233 00:09:09,918 --> 00:09:11,118 with me tonight, but if you do -- 234 00:09:11,151 --> 00:09:12,586 Yes we do. Ooo wee! 235 00:09:12,619 --> 00:09:14,121 I wanna party with Hugh Jackman. Squanch yeah! 236 00:09:14,154 --> 00:09:16,723 If you do, you do it together, as a team. 237 00:09:16,757 --> 00:09:19,460 Now, I need to go take what I call a "Huge Ackman." 238 00:09:19,493 --> 00:09:21,328 Ackman is Australian slang for shit. 239 00:09:21,361 --> 00:09:23,330 Don't look it up. Do make a decision. 240 00:09:23,363 --> 00:09:26,333 Because from here, I'm heading to the Jack Shack. 241 00:09:26,366 --> 00:09:28,969 What's the Jack Shack? It's just his house. 242 00:09:29,002 --> 00:09:31,071 But, guys, I don't think we should go there. 243 00:09:31,104 --> 00:09:32,873 I challenge you to explain why not 244 00:09:32,907 --> 00:09:34,808 without making us want to go more. 245 00:09:34,842 --> 00:09:37,444 Well, Hugh's pretty anti-limitation. 246 00:09:37,478 --> 00:09:40,447 When he parties, it gets extreme. 247 00:09:40,481 --> 00:09:41,548 Challenge failed. 248 00:09:41,582 --> 00:09:43,484 Woah! What's extreme by the Gene metric? 249 00:09:43,517 --> 00:09:45,252 Does he have "Les Mis" shot glasses? 250 00:09:45,285 --> 00:09:46,854 We're not exactly squanchweights, brother. 251 00:09:46,887 --> 00:09:50,991 It's my birthday, and I wish to party with Huuugh Jackman. 252 00:09:51,024 --> 00:09:52,626 ♪ Then you shaaaaaalllllllll! ♪ 253 00:09:52,659 --> 00:09:54,027 That was a fast shit. 254 00:09:54,061 --> 00:09:55,028 But first everybody's taking these. 255 00:09:55,062 --> 00:09:56,430 What are they? 256 00:09:56,463 --> 00:09:58,899 Huh, maybe they're Tic Tacs. Maybe they're cyanide. 257 00:09:58,933 --> 00:10:00,701 Maybe I don't like to party 258 00:10:00,734 --> 00:10:02,135 with people that hesitate. 259 00:10:02,169 --> 00:10:03,938 Heh heh heh! There you go! 260 00:10:03,972 --> 00:10:05,072 That's the spirit! 261 00:10:05,105 --> 00:10:07,207 Now we're all completely... 262 00:10:07,241 --> 00:10:10,177 ♪ Fuuuuuuuuuuhhhhh! ♪ 263 00:10:12,813 --> 00:10:15,015 This was not oversold! 264 00:10:15,048 --> 00:10:18,685 "A, B, D, E" -- I lost my "C." 265 00:10:18,719 --> 00:10:20,187 My alphabet has no "C"! 266 00:10:20,220 --> 00:10:21,188 Did I do these already? 267 00:10:21,221 --> 00:10:23,557 D-Did I ask that already? 268 00:10:23,590 --> 00:10:25,626 Squanch, yeah! My turn! 269 00:10:26,928 --> 00:10:28,462 Did I win? 270 00:10:29,696 --> 00:10:30,965 Mm. Mm. 271 00:10:30,999 --> 00:10:33,066 Ahhh...The best bloody day of my life. 272 00:10:33,100 --> 00:10:35,202 My wedding was pretty great, too. 273 00:10:35,235 --> 00:10:37,137 I was talking about the Tony award. 274 00:10:37,170 --> 00:10:39,072 Yooohoho! Pull! 275 00:10:39,106 --> 00:10:40,207 -Yeah! -Woo-hoo! 276 00:10:40,240 --> 00:10:41,775 Yeah! We're squanching now! 277 00:10:41,808 --> 00:10:43,011 Why the long face, mate? 278 00:10:43,043 --> 00:10:44,311 Shape of my skull. 279 00:10:44,344 --> 00:10:45,914 You know, Mr. Poopybutthole, 280 00:10:45,947 --> 00:10:48,482 when I wrote "Caribbean Queen," you know what my agent said? 281 00:10:48,515 --> 00:10:50,417 Billy Ocean wrote that -- That's what he said. 282 00:10:50,450 --> 00:10:52,319 Exactly that. "Billy Ocean wrote this. 283 00:10:52,352 --> 00:10:53,887 Don't write it again. You're not Billy Ocean." 284 00:10:53,922 --> 00:10:56,256 You know what I did? I fired my agent. 285 00:10:56,290 --> 00:10:59,593 Don't accept other people's limitations. 286 00:10:59,626 --> 00:11:02,931 What does your heart want, lil' ripper? 287 00:11:02,964 --> 00:11:04,164 Right now, don't think. 288 00:11:04,197 --> 00:11:07,301 Right now, my heart wants Amy back. 289 00:11:07,334 --> 00:11:09,136 Everybody! Our friend wants Amy back. 290 00:11:09,169 --> 00:11:10,404 Squanch idea! 291 00:11:10,437 --> 00:11:12,406 I will agree to anything in this state. 292 00:11:12,439 --> 00:11:14,575 I do not think that's a good idea. 293 00:11:14,608 --> 00:11:17,477 Ladies and gentlemen! This man is a fake friend! 294 00:11:17,511 --> 00:11:18,612 Come on, Hugh. 295 00:11:18,645 --> 00:11:21,148 "Come on, Hugh. Come on, everybody. 296 00:11:21,181 --> 00:11:22,416 Don't call Hugh Jackman Wolverine. 297 00:11:22,449 --> 00:11:24,052 Don't call yourself Billy Ocean. 298 00:11:24,084 --> 00:11:25,352 Don't get Amy Back." 299 00:11:25,385 --> 00:11:27,321 You're a vampire, brother. 300 00:11:27,354 --> 00:11:29,023 You feed off other people's energy. 301 00:11:29,057 --> 00:11:31,258 That is kind of true. Are you kidding me?! 302 00:11:31,291 --> 00:11:33,260 You've been living on my daughter's sofa for months! 303 00:11:33,293 --> 00:11:35,529 Do you want me to leave? The entire family does! 304 00:11:35,562 --> 00:11:38,765 Why not say something? Because you're my friend! 305 00:11:38,799 --> 00:11:42,036 A real friend would have known it's not my birthday. 306 00:11:42,070 --> 00:11:44,104 Oooooooooh, shit! 307 00:11:44,137 --> 00:11:45,339 Fake friend! 308 00:11:45,372 --> 00:11:47,207 You're not helping, Hugh Jackman! 309 00:11:47,240 --> 00:11:50,210 Yoooooou do not tell meeeeee what to do! 310 00:11:50,243 --> 00:11:51,244 Or anyone here. Affirmative. 311 00:11:51,278 --> 00:11:52,512 -Woo! -Yeah, baby! 312 00:11:52,546 --> 00:11:54,314 Why would you pretend it was your birthday?! 313 00:11:54,348 --> 00:11:56,617 You think I don't know a half-assed intervention 314 00:11:56,650 --> 00:11:58,185 when I see one coming?! 315 00:11:58,218 --> 00:12:00,220 Oooooooooooooh, shit! Mm! 316 00:12:00,253 --> 00:12:01,455 I love where you are, man. 317 00:12:01,488 --> 00:12:02,656 You're just Wolverining right now. 318 00:12:02,689 --> 00:12:03,824 You -- You feel that? 319 00:12:03,857 --> 00:12:04,959 I think so. 320 00:12:04,993 --> 00:12:06,693 Does Wolverining hurt a little? 321 00:12:06,727 --> 00:12:07,962 Every time! 322 00:12:07,996 --> 00:12:09,563 Alright, grab a drink to go, gentlemen. 323 00:12:09,596 --> 00:12:11,665 Because we're either getting Amy back... 324 00:12:11,698 --> 00:12:12,934 or... we're going home. 325 00:12:12,967 --> 00:12:14,002 You're nuts! 326 00:12:14,035 --> 00:12:15,669 Then nut me up, bitch! 327 00:12:15,702 --> 00:12:17,404 Nut me up! 328 00:12:17,437 --> 00:12:19,040 Nut me up! Nut me up! 329 00:12:19,073 --> 00:12:20,108 It's not an expression! 330 00:12:20,140 --> 00:12:21,441 -Woo! -Ha ha! 331 00:12:21,475 --> 00:12:23,111 Amy's coming back dead or alive! 332 00:12:23,143 --> 00:12:24,645 Woah! Haha! 333 00:12:24,678 --> 00:12:26,680 -Yes! -Yeah! 334 00:12:26,713 --> 00:12:29,650 Fake friend, my ass. I know how to be there for my friends. 335 00:12:31,818 --> 00:12:33,320 Father?! Why?! 336 00:12:33,353 --> 00:12:34,788 Ah, crap. Hang on. 337 00:12:34,821 --> 00:12:36,124 Lemme go upstairs and grab the business finisher. 338 00:12:36,156 --> 00:12:37,624 From where I'm sitting, 339 00:12:37,658 --> 00:12:40,160 you're the one with unfinished business. 340 00:12:40,193 --> 00:12:42,063 Hey, mind your own business. 341 00:12:42,096 --> 00:12:44,065 Business is my business! 342 00:12:44,098 --> 00:12:47,969 And, brother, business is good. 343 00:12:52,372 --> 00:12:55,242 Oh, you come back to ruin our fuuun? 344 00:12:55,275 --> 00:12:56,911 No. To help you finish this. 345 00:12:56,944 --> 00:12:58,245 I made you guys come out 346 00:12:58,278 --> 00:13:00,380 because I didn't want to talk to PB alone. 347 00:13:00,414 --> 00:13:02,716 I'm here to go down with the ship. Respect, Rick. 348 00:13:02,749 --> 00:13:04,584 Hit it, Hugh! 349 00:13:04,618 --> 00:13:09,157 ♪ I lose my cool when she steps in the room ♪ 350 00:13:11,159 --> 00:13:12,759 ♪ Unh, unh ♪ 351 00:13:12,793 --> 00:13:16,596 ♪ And I get so excited just from her perfume ♪ 352 00:13:16,630 --> 00:13:19,733 Oo weee, there she is. My Amy! 353 00:13:21,468 --> 00:13:23,336 ♪ Electric eyes that you can't ignore ♪ 354 00:13:23,370 --> 00:13:25,405 Oh, she feels my love around her! Oowee! 355 00:13:25,439 --> 00:13:27,942 Wow. Your love is pretty strong. 356 00:13:29,276 --> 00:13:31,012 I guess that's not all she's feeling. 357 00:13:31,045 --> 00:13:32,846 ♪ And passion burns you like never before ♪ Predator P.I.? 358 00:13:32,879 --> 00:13:35,615 This is the opposite of what I hired you for! 359 00:13:35,649 --> 00:13:39,286 Now, now. Did you do this, Gul'Karna? 360 00:13:39,319 --> 00:13:42,522 ♪ I was in search of a good time ♪ You do this? You do this? 361 00:13:42,556 --> 00:13:44,391 ♪ Just running my game ♪ 362 00:13:44,424 --> 00:13:47,095 I'm gonna uncloak this later... Now. Now. Now. 363 00:13:47,128 --> 00:13:49,663 ♪ Love was the furthest, furthest from my mind, yeah ♪ 364 00:13:49,696 --> 00:13:51,999 Okay, honestly, PB, that could have gone a lot worse -- 365 00:13:52,033 --> 00:13:53,567 PB? 366 00:13:53,600 --> 00:13:55,736 ♪ Caribbean Queen ♪ Ooooweeee, gotta goooo! 367 00:13:55,769 --> 00:13:57,038 Run! 368 00:13:59,207 --> 00:14:01,875 I'm too drunk to flee a Predator right now! 369 00:14:01,909 --> 00:14:04,745 Mud! The -- The mud thing! Everyone mud up and hide! 370 00:14:06,047 --> 00:14:07,181 What's that smell? 371 00:14:07,215 --> 00:14:08,916 Ugh, Squanchy! That's not mud. 372 00:14:08,950 --> 00:14:10,184 Well, I'm not from this planet! 373 00:14:10,218 --> 00:14:11,718 Daddy, what's happening? 374 00:14:11,752 --> 00:14:13,754 Quiet, Poopy Jr.! I'm taking you home! 375 00:14:13,787 --> 00:14:15,322 Aah! 376 00:14:15,355 --> 00:14:16,924 Look, I just didn't think I could -- 377 00:14:16,958 --> 00:14:18,059 What? Be honest? 378 00:14:18,092 --> 00:14:19,227 Don't high-road me! 379 00:14:19,259 --> 00:14:20,460 It's just as dishonest to play dumb 380 00:14:20,494 --> 00:14:21,895 about wearing out your welcome! 381 00:14:21,929 --> 00:14:23,430 You could've just told me! 382 00:14:23,463 --> 00:14:25,732 You're an adult! Read the room and figure it out! 383 00:14:45,385 --> 00:14:48,055 I admit it -- that -- that was self destructive. 384 00:14:49,656 --> 00:14:52,160 Use me as a shield! I feel nothing! 385 00:14:52,193 --> 00:14:53,894 Ca-cawwww! 386 00:14:55,395 --> 00:14:57,231 Squanch this! 387 00:15:00,433 --> 00:15:02,502 I'm so -- 388 00:15:02,536 --> 00:15:04,604 I'm so squanched up, man. 389 00:15:07,041 --> 00:15:09,076 I-I'm not really with these guys. 390 00:15:09,110 --> 00:15:10,945 I was just walking in this park -- 391 00:15:10,978 --> 00:15:13,080 Aagh! 392 00:15:13,114 --> 00:15:14,381 No! 393 00:15:14,414 --> 00:15:16,483 Why is this my thing?! 394 00:15:16,516 --> 00:15:18,986 No! I won't let you take my family from me! 395 00:15:20,922 --> 00:15:26,326 Ow! Oh, ohhhhhhh! 396 00:15:28,562 --> 00:15:31,765 Guess you didn't see season 4, episode 3! 397 00:15:31,798 --> 00:15:32,766 Let's go -- 398 00:15:32,799 --> 00:15:35,036 Oh! Oh! Ohh!! 399 00:15:35,069 --> 00:15:37,205 Oh! 400 00:15:37,238 --> 00:15:39,406 Who's got the three dots on their forehead now? 401 00:15:39,439 --> 00:15:41,608 Could have done that before he punched me. 402 00:15:44,178 --> 00:15:46,247 Suck my squanch! 403 00:15:46,280 --> 00:15:47,380 Ahhh! 404 00:15:51,052 --> 00:15:52,253 Gimme that big ol' tooth! 405 00:15:52,286 --> 00:15:54,121 Gullll'Karrrna... 406 00:16:00,094 --> 00:16:01,862 No, no, no, stop! 407 00:16:01,895 --> 00:16:04,031 What are you doing? I want that skull! 408 00:16:04,065 --> 00:16:05,599 No, Rick. No more. 409 00:16:05,632 --> 00:16:07,500 This is my fault. All of it. 410 00:16:07,534 --> 00:16:10,137 And if he's gonna protect my wife and chiiild, 411 00:16:10,171 --> 00:16:13,207 that's a great thing to know while I get my shit together. 412 00:16:13,241 --> 00:16:14,308 Wayne? 413 00:16:14,342 --> 00:16:15,943 Wayne? Aaaamy. 414 00:16:15,977 --> 00:16:18,445 I-I messed up real baaad. 415 00:16:18,478 --> 00:16:21,015 I came to say I don't know what to do without you, 416 00:16:21,048 --> 00:16:24,218 but I guess I can start by not kidnapping. 417 00:16:24,252 --> 00:16:27,154 That's definitely where you should start. 418 00:16:30,824 --> 00:16:33,227 I'm...sorry, Amy. 419 00:16:33,261 --> 00:16:35,428 You should be. But I'm not. 420 00:16:35,462 --> 00:16:39,833 We're a family now -- Me, Poopy Jr., and Gul'Karna, 421 00:16:39,866 --> 00:16:42,303 Clan Leader of The Skin-Thieves. 422 00:16:42,336 --> 00:16:44,071 Goodbye, Wayne. 423 00:16:44,105 --> 00:16:45,172 Goodbye. 424 00:16:46,406 --> 00:16:48,475 Ooo-weee, a musket? 425 00:16:48,508 --> 00:16:50,577 I'm starting to think it's like their currency. 426 00:16:50,610 --> 00:16:52,779 I hunt because I must. 427 00:16:52,812 --> 00:16:56,583 But man possesses a precious gift -- the power to change. 428 00:16:56,616 --> 00:16:59,186 More like the power of music, bitch! 429 00:16:59,220 --> 00:17:00,587 What the?! 430 00:17:00,620 --> 00:17:02,489 Jesus, Hugh, we were just resolving it. 431 00:17:02,522 --> 00:17:04,424 Well, I'm an actor, and I'm high. 432 00:17:04,457 --> 00:17:06,493 "'Caribbean Queen,' written by Hugh Jackman, 433 00:17:06,526 --> 00:17:07,627 age sixteen." 434 00:17:07,661 --> 00:17:09,729 How's that for a twist? 435 00:17:09,763 --> 00:17:10,830 Confusing. 436 00:17:10,864 --> 00:17:12,666 Well, sometimes you have to believe. 437 00:17:12,699 --> 00:17:14,936 Wow, that's reeeal inspiring. 438 00:17:14,969 --> 00:17:16,304 Makes me think of how -- 439 00:17:16,337 --> 00:17:18,838 Get the hell out of here! Okay, okay, sorry! 440 00:17:18,872 --> 00:17:20,908 Alright guys, I'm buying drive-through tacos, 441 00:17:20,942 --> 00:17:24,345 but nobody tells my nutritionist and we have to steal a car. 442 00:17:25,679 --> 00:17:26,948 "Wayne," huh? 443 00:17:26,981 --> 00:17:28,416 Oooweee. 444 00:17:28,448 --> 00:17:31,185 But I prefer Mr. Pooooopybutthole. 445 00:17:31,218 --> 00:17:32,320 More refined. 446 00:17:33,988 --> 00:17:35,755 It appears Birddaughter has broken into 447 00:17:35,789 --> 00:17:37,724 another Federation compound. 448 00:17:37,757 --> 00:17:39,093 I must go. 449 00:17:39,126 --> 00:17:41,728 Wayne, this counts as attending your actual birthday. 450 00:17:41,761 --> 00:17:44,564 Rick. It was... canonical to see you. 451 00:17:44,597 --> 00:17:46,167 Yeah, let's call it. 452 00:17:46,200 --> 00:17:48,768 I wanna pass out before I remember what we did tonight. 453 00:17:48,802 --> 00:17:50,704 I never want to forget it. 454 00:17:50,737 --> 00:17:52,739 And I never want to repeat it. 455 00:17:52,772 --> 00:17:54,641 Proud of you, little buddy. 456 00:17:55,142 --> 00:17:56,643 You too, Squanch. 457 00:17:56,676 --> 00:17:58,845 Awww,! Look at us! 458 00:17:58,878 --> 00:18:01,781 A bird guy, talking cat, uh, what are you? 459 00:18:01,815 --> 00:18:03,850 A robot man, and a mutant. 460 00:18:03,883 --> 00:18:06,153 Wow. Was a bonzer night, mates! 461 00:18:06,187 --> 00:18:07,554 That's one for the books. 462 00:18:07,587 --> 00:18:09,856 Oooo, bonzer night indeed. 463 00:18:09,889 --> 00:18:12,326 Kept in touch with the guys over the years. 464 00:18:12,360 --> 00:18:14,996 As much as ya can in this fast world. 465 00:18:15,029 --> 00:18:17,465 Birdperson went home to take on a challenge 466 00:18:17,497 --> 00:18:19,967 way more difficult than a Predator -- 467 00:18:20,001 --> 00:18:21,902 raising Birddaughter. 468 00:18:21,936 --> 00:18:23,803 Gearhead went back to The Gear System 469 00:18:23,837 --> 00:18:26,307 and got a spinal replacement. 470 00:18:26,340 --> 00:18:28,175 He's still paying it off. 471 00:18:28,209 --> 00:18:29,477 Squanchy? 472 00:18:29,509 --> 00:18:31,811 Checked himself into a nice rehab. 473 00:18:31,845 --> 00:18:34,148 No one thought it would stick, and it didn't. 474 00:18:34,181 --> 00:18:36,649 He was later arrested for smuggling toad venom 475 00:18:36,683 --> 00:18:38,386 across the border. 476 00:18:38,419 --> 00:18:40,087 Hugh Jackman went to the Jack Shack 477 00:18:40,121 --> 00:18:43,157 to glue back together the Tony award that Gene shot. 478 00:18:43,190 --> 00:18:44,791 And possibly to put a bullet 479 00:18:44,824 --> 00:18:47,261 in all future Wolverine references. 480 00:18:47,294 --> 00:18:48,496 Thanks to us. 481 00:18:48,528 --> 00:18:49,829 And what came of Rick? 482 00:18:49,863 --> 00:18:51,898 I think he learned something that night. 483 00:18:51,932 --> 00:18:53,334 About friendship. 484 00:18:53,367 --> 00:18:54,969 About honesty. 485 00:18:55,002 --> 00:18:58,638 And maybe he learned something about himseelllf. 486 00:18:58,671 --> 00:19:01,375 Oh. Here. Forgot to give you a fading pill. 487 00:19:01,409 --> 00:19:03,710 Great for hangovers. Just to clarify, 488 00:19:03,743 --> 00:19:05,745 I-I had to take an un-fading pill 489 00:19:05,779 --> 00:19:08,449 to counteract the original fading pill I just took. 490 00:19:08,482 --> 00:19:10,151 Oh. Uh. Okay? 491 00:19:10,184 --> 00:19:11,919 And if you're hung up on why the taxi disappeared, 492 00:19:11,952 --> 00:19:13,421 the -- the pills aren't sentient, 493 00:19:13,454 --> 00:19:14,989 but they do detect human coverings, 494 00:19:15,022 --> 00:19:18,392 so it saw the taxi as some sort of large overcoat -- 495 00:19:18,426 --> 00:19:19,527 doesn't matter. 496 00:19:19,559 --> 00:19:21,694 You, uh, gonna be alright? 497 00:19:21,728 --> 00:19:23,164 Got a place to stay? 498 00:19:23,197 --> 00:19:25,266 I can 3D print you an apartment on the moon. 499 00:19:25,299 --> 00:19:27,801 I'll figure it out, Rick. Thanks. 500 00:19:27,834 --> 00:19:31,405 Well, here I go pill'in again. 501 00:19:31,439 --> 00:19:36,776 Yep. Don't any of you worry about Mr. Pooooopybutthole. 502 00:19:36,810 --> 00:19:38,079 I got a lot of work to do, 503 00:19:38,112 --> 00:19:40,247 but I'll land on my poopy little feet. 504 00:19:40,281 --> 00:19:42,249 I always do! 505 00:19:42,283 --> 00:19:44,717 Owww! This burns like hell! 506 00:19:44,751 --> 00:19:46,719 How did the other guys not react? 507 00:19:46,753 --> 00:19:47,787 Is mine different? 508 00:19:47,821 --> 00:19:50,458 It's like my skin is boiling! 509 00:19:50,491 --> 00:19:53,027 Guys, I got the Best Buds Burrito Box! 510 00:19:53,060 --> 00:19:54,828 They normally ask for proof of friendship, 511 00:19:54,861 --> 00:19:57,331 but the cashier trusted me that you guys were out... 512 00:19:58,631 --> 00:19:59,967 ...heeere. 513 00:20:01,402 --> 00:20:03,037 Not cool, man. 514 00:20:04,438 --> 00:20:06,207 Aah. 515 00:20:41,774 --> 00:20:43,710 You don't have to do this, Sheriff! 516 00:20:43,743 --> 00:20:45,212 It's your last day on the job! 517 00:20:45,246 --> 00:20:47,481 That's exactly why I must. 518 00:20:47,515 --> 00:20:49,649 I ain't retiring a coward. 519 00:20:49,682 --> 00:20:51,418 Now get out of here, Officer. 520 00:20:51,452 --> 00:20:54,255 And go take care of my granddaughter. 521 00:21:26,753 --> 00:21:30,024 ♪ When I was young and in my prime ♪ 522 00:21:30,057 --> 00:21:33,793 ♪ My mind being free from care ♪ 523 00:21:33,826 --> 00:21:35,996 I ain't scared of you! 524 00:21:36,030 --> 00:21:39,866 ♪ Whilst leaving all in Donegal ♪ 525 00:21:39,899 --> 00:21:42,102 ♪ That I might plough ♪ 526 00:21:42,136 --> 00:21:44,905 ♪ The raging main ♪ 527 00:21:44,939 --> 00:21:50,710 ♪ Going to Amerikay-- ♪ 528 00:22:01,522 --> 00:22:02,923 W-What happened? 529 00:22:02,957 --> 00:22:05,025 I think it ran out of gas. 530 00:22:05,059 --> 00:22:06,427 Oh. 531 00:22:06,460 --> 00:22:07,727 Sooo, he could have survived 532 00:22:07,760 --> 00:22:10,231 if he just stood back five feet? 533 00:22:10,264 --> 00:22:11,632 Well... 534 00:22:11,665 --> 00:22:14,235 let's not tell his granddaughter that. 535 00:22:15,669 --> 00:22:17,238 Did you get any of that? 38387

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.