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1
00:00:01,359 --> 00:00:03,999
- Okay, so it's day four.
- It's actually day five.
2
00:00:04,000 --> 00:00:06,726
Right. Sorry. And you're on
your way to Fort Lauderdale...
3
00:00:06,752 --> 00:00:08,888
No, he's meeting his
sister-in-law outside Orlando
4
00:00:08,920 --> 00:00:10,923
to pick up the mysterious
product he stole from work.
5
00:00:10,948 --> 00:00:11,359
Right.
6
00:00:11,359 --> 00:00:13,695
And your wife was taking your
two kids, Jared and Delilah...
7
00:00:13,727 --> 00:00:15,587
The boy's name is actually
Jareb with a "B."
8
00:00:15,613 --> 00:00:16,981
All right. Yes. I'm sorry.
9
00:00:17,015 --> 00:00:18,750
And they were on their way home
to Syracuse...
10
00:00:18,789 --> 00:00:19,887
Because she was sick of his lies.
11
00:00:19,887 --> 00:00:21,589
Sharon, please.
They have a strong relationship.
12
00:00:21,622 --> 00:00:23,148
She's not even his wife.
They're not married.
13
00:00:23,149 --> 00:00:25,547
That's because she's actually
married to some guy named Carlos.
14
00:00:25,573 --> 00:00:26,120
[Files thud]
15
00:00:26,153 --> 00:00:27,955
- Tell me about this guy.
- What about Orlando?
16
00:00:27,989 --> 00:00:30,024
Why didn't your sister-in-law
meet you in Fort Lauderdale?
17
00:00:30,056 --> 00:00:31,792
Because she's a coke-fueled shit show.
18
00:00:31,826 --> 00:00:34,263
Yeah, but wait. You said
she's clean and sober now,
19
00:00:34,295 --> 00:00:35,933
and on the road with
a Christian rock band.
20
00:00:35,934 --> 00:00:36,340
How'd that happen?
21
00:00:36,366 --> 00:00:38,109
How the hell would he know?
He wasn't there.
22
00:00:38,135 --> 00:00:40,871
She could've taken a rideshare
for all he knows. Who cares?
23
00:00:40,904 --> 00:00:44,041
How does that have any
bearing on this story?
24
00:00:44,074 --> 00:00:45,876
This is my investigation!
25
00:00:45,908 --> 00:00:47,877
Kinda sucks to feel like
the dummy, doesn't it?
26
00:00:47,910 --> 00:00:49,078
- Shut up.
- Yep.
27
00:00:49,111 --> 00:00:51,481
All right, what was in the bag?
28
00:00:51,514 --> 00:00:54,718
- Was it drugs?
- Oh.
29
00:00:54,751 --> 00:00:57,455
30
00:00:57,487 --> 00:01:00,890
[Sniffing]
31
00:01:00,923 --> 00:01:02,560
- [Footsteps approaching]
- What is this?
32
00:01:02,593 --> 00:01:03,628
Is this drugs?
33
00:01:03,629 --> 00:01:05,598
- I can't mail drugs.
- You can't fly.
34
00:01:05,631 --> 00:01:07,498
Of course I can't fly, Marco!
35
00:01:07,532 --> 00:01:08,866
"Hi, I'd like to check in
36
00:01:08,899 --> 00:01:11,576
one bag of evil corporate science goo."
37
00:01:11,670 --> 00:01:12,631
How am I gonna get this to Florida?
38
00:01:12,658 --> 00:01:13,072
[Sniffing]
39
00:01:13,105 --> 00:01:14,599
[Knock on door]
40
00:01:14,600 --> 00:01:15,802
Morris: Nate?
41
00:01:15,835 --> 00:01:18,299
We're here on official P.F.R. business!
42
00:01:18,332 --> 00:01:19,679
[Crunches]
43
00:01:19,706 --> 00:01:20,723
What's P.F.R.?
44
00:01:20,749 --> 00:01:22,442
[Whispers] That's, like,
two levels above FBI.
45
00:01:22,475 --> 00:01:23,809
Shit!
46
00:01:23,843 --> 00:01:28,481
47
00:01:28,513 --> 00:01:29,948
I know y'all in there!
48
00:01:29,981 --> 00:01:32,319
Don't pretend like you're not home now!
49
00:01:34,686 --> 00:01:36,422
Come on, Morris. Let's go. [Crunching]
50
00:01:36,456 --> 00:01:37,924
51
00:01:37,957 --> 00:01:39,726
Oh, shit!
52
00:01:41,893 --> 00:01:43,762
Uhh! Shit.
53
00:01:44,529 --> 00:01:46,599
What the hell?
54
00:01:46,632 --> 00:01:48,968
Should we, like, follow her?
55
00:01:49,001 --> 00:01:51,303
I guess so.
56
00:01:51,337 --> 00:01:53,840
Man:
Somewhere behind the mountains
57
00:01:53,873 --> 00:01:56,609
There is a place I figured out...
58
00:01:56,641 --> 00:01:58,977
[Music warps, rewinds]
59
00:01:59,010 --> 00:02:01,147
[Whirring sound]
60
00:02:03,648 --> 00:02:05,744
What kind of car would you like?
61
00:02:05,744 --> 00:02:07,213
I think we'll take a 3-seater.
62
00:02:07,247 --> 00:02:08,547
We always get four seats 'cause of dad.
63
00:02:08,581 --> 00:02:10,717
I swear, you get dumber by the second.
64
00:02:10,749 --> 00:02:14,517
And it's returning to... Syracuse.
65
00:02:14,543 --> 00:02:17,724
- "S"..."R"...
- [Cellphone ringing]
66
00:02:17,756 --> 00:02:19,759
"Y"...
67
00:02:19,791 --> 00:02:21,494
- [Touchscreen clicks]
- "K"...
68
00:02:21,528 --> 00:02:24,614
Chazz's mom says children
of divorce are actually lucky.
69
00:02:24,640 --> 00:02:25,598
We're not getting divorced.
70
00:02:25,631 --> 00:02:27,300
Well, obviously. You're not married.
71
00:02:27,332 --> 00:02:29,844
Chazz's parents try to
outdo each other at Christmas.
72
00:02:29,877 --> 00:02:32,465
He winds up getting double the presents.
73
00:02:32,491 --> 00:02:34,192
And double chances at catching Santa
74
00:02:34,225 --> 00:02:35,732
and stealing his pot of gold.
75
00:02:35,732 --> 00:02:37,434
Hey, you're current
and only father will be home
76
00:02:37,468 --> 00:02:38,835
as soon as he's done doing
77
00:02:38,869 --> 00:02:40,437
whatever insane thing he's doing, okay?
78
00:02:40,470 --> 00:02:42,105
Is there a "Q" in Syracuse?
79
00:02:42,138 --> 00:02:44,107
Not anymore. No, they changed it.
80
00:02:44,141 --> 00:02:46,042
[Chuckles] Hey, Vanessa, it's Nate.
81
00:02:46,076 --> 00:02:47,745
- Still on the road?
- No, I'm here...
82
00:02:47,785 --> 00:02:49,518
Wherever the [Bleep] here is.
83
00:02:49,519 --> 00:02:51,153
Dashing through the snow...
84
00:02:51,838 --> 00:02:54,508
Woman: Welcome to salvation, Florida,
85
00:02:54,541 --> 00:02:58,512
where it's Christmas 364 days a year!
86
00:02:58,546 --> 00:02:59,981
We're closed on Christmas.
87
00:03:00,013 --> 00:03:02,183
I don't know, because
Christmas sucks maybe?
88
00:03:02,215 --> 00:03:04,753
- Bah humbug.
- Just get here!
89
00:03:04,785 --> 00:03:08,155
Looks like we found
ourselves a scrooge, folks.
90
00:03:08,189 --> 00:03:10,858
Tourists: Scrooge! Thank you. Thank you.
91
00:03:10,892 --> 00:03:13,161
Yes. Yes, I-I'm glad
my misery makes you happy.
92
00:03:13,194 --> 00:03:15,942
Come on, Ebeneezer,
everybody loves Christmas.
93
00:03:15,968 --> 00:03:17,427
- Yeah? Jews?
- Yeah.
94
00:03:17,428 --> 00:03:18,271
- Muslims?
- Uh-huh.
95
00:03:18,271 --> 00:03:19,116
- Buddhists?
- Uh-huh.
96
00:03:19,116 --> 00:03:20,084
- Taoists?
- Uh-huh.
97
00:03:20,116 --> 00:03:20,954
- Hindus?
- Uh-huh.
98
00:03:20,955 --> 00:03:21,923
- Ashantis?
- Uh-huh.
99
00:03:21,957 --> 00:03:23,189
- Jehovah's?
- Uh-huh.
100
00:03:23,215 --> 00:03:24,068
- Shintos?
- Uh-huh.
101
00:03:24,069 --> 00:03:25,067
- Atheists?
- Uh-huh.
102
00:03:25,067 --> 00:03:26,642
- Choctaws?
- That's their favorite.
103
00:03:26,668 --> 00:03:29,171
- Okay. Where's the bar?
- The bar?
104
00:03:29,204 --> 00:03:30,947
- Uh-huh.
- That way!
105
00:03:30,948 --> 00:03:32,081
- Great.
- Make way!
106
00:03:32,115 --> 00:03:34,784
Sad dad coming through! [Chuckles]
107
00:03:34,818 --> 00:03:38,422
In a one-horse open sleigh
108
00:03:38,461 --> 00:03:40,508
- elf: Hope you find some spirit!
- Clever.
109
00:03:40,509 --> 00:03:42,311
- Come this way, guys.
- [Whispers] God.
110
00:03:42,346 --> 00:03:43,144
[Stomps feet]
111
00:03:43,144 --> 00:03:45,093
That snow's really
coming down out there.
112
00:03:45,119 --> 00:03:48,135
Yeah. Whatever that snow is
made of is burning my skin.
113
00:03:48,161 --> 00:03:49,963
But it wouldn't be Christmas
without it though, pal.
114
00:03:49,997 --> 00:03:52,399
[Laughs] Yeah! Pal, it's not Christmas.
115
00:03:52,433 --> 00:03:53,797
Uh, whatcha drinkin'?
116
00:03:53,797 --> 00:03:56,066
Your darkest beer and
your cheapest bourbon.
117
00:03:56,098 --> 00:03:58,469
Sounds like somebody's trying
to forget his troubles.
118
00:03:58,501 --> 00:04:00,403
Oh, no, I'm actually celebrating.
119
00:04:00,687 --> 00:04:02,542
- My family left me and I lost my job.
120
00:04:02,568 --> 00:04:04,287
So... hooray!
121
00:04:04,320 --> 00:04:07,290
["Silent Night" playing]
122
00:04:07,922 --> 00:04:09,157
What the hell is that?
123
00:04:09,190 --> 00:04:09,938
Apple juice.
124
00:04:09,939 --> 00:04:12,242
It's a fake sad bar, not a real sad bar.
125
00:04:12,275 --> 00:04:13,476
[Shot glass thuds]
126
00:04:13,510 --> 00:04:15,245
- Another one?
- No.
127
00:04:15,770 --> 00:04:17,739
Hey, the kids and I are
coming home early,
128
00:04:17,771 --> 00:04:19,206
so get rid of the weirdos
and clean up the house,
129
00:04:19,240 --> 00:04:21,369
- would you?
- I'm not at your house.
130
00:04:21,369 --> 00:04:23,905
I'm on the road with my new family.
131
00:04:23,937 --> 00:04:25,534
Our car broke down.
132
00:04:25,535 --> 00:04:27,771
Caleb says Nate preyed upon
my generous nature to...
133
00:04:27,804 --> 00:04:30,006
Oh, Jesus. Did you join a cult?
134
00:04:30,040 --> 00:04:32,303
Caleb says others can't define me.
135
00:04:32,304 --> 00:04:34,134
Okay, I need you to
be normal right now.
136
00:04:34,160 --> 00:04:34,744
Yeah?
137
00:04:34,778 --> 00:04:36,379
Well, I'm not the one
whose husband got fired
138
00:04:36,412 --> 00:04:38,488
for stealing some weird, dangerous shit!
139
00:04:38,514 --> 00:04:39,030
What?
140
00:04:39,063 --> 00:04:41,098
Now government goons with guns
141
00:04:41,124 --> 00:04:44,808
and helicopters with intra-red
goggles are following me, too.
142
00:04:44,808 --> 00:04:46,577
What are you talking about?
143
00:04:46,609 --> 00:04:48,244
But it's okay. [Sighs]
144
00:04:48,277 --> 00:04:50,046
I'm gonna save Nate.
145
00:04:50,080 --> 00:04:52,049
- Caleb says...
- Where are you?
146
00:04:52,082 --> 00:04:54,719
- I'm really close to salvation.
- Holy shit.
147
00:04:54,751 --> 00:04:56,307
Vanessa, are you gonna kill yourself?
148
00:04:56,308 --> 00:04:58,314
Salvation, Florida. It's
really close to Orlando.
149
00:04:58,349 --> 00:05:00,016
Oh. Oh, yeah. Okay.
150
00:05:00,042 --> 00:05:01,140
Well, definitely don't kill yourself.
151
00:05:01,140 --> 00:05:02,775
I'll... I'll see you soon.
152
00:05:03,157 --> 00:05:04,721
Okay, ma'am, you're all set.
153
00:05:04,747 --> 00:05:07,783
Just press "confirm," and you're
on your way to Syracuse.
154
00:05:07,815 --> 00:05:09,818
- Ohh, you bastard.
- Yes?
155
00:05:09,851 --> 00:05:11,453
Nope, not you.
156
00:05:11,486 --> 00:05:15,690
D'oh. God. You do this every time!
157
00:05:15,723 --> 00:05:18,627
All right, kids... [sighs]
You know what?
158
00:05:18,659 --> 00:05:20,628
We're gonna go save your idiot dad.
159
00:05:20,661 --> 00:05:22,464
I need to change my
destination to Florida.
160
00:05:22,497 --> 00:05:24,867
- Flo Rida?
- No, Florida.
161
00:05:24,899 --> 00:05:27,536
- "F"..."I"...
- [Machine beeping]
162
00:05:27,569 --> 00:05:28,738
- "Os"...
- Nope.
163
00:05:28,771 --> 00:05:30,005
- "Ur"...
- No, no "U."
164
00:05:30,038 --> 00:05:31,540
- Can I talk to somebody...
- [Sighs deeply]
165
00:05:31,572 --> 00:05:33,375
Whose first day it isn't?
166
00:05:35,743 --> 00:05:37,912
O Christmas tree, o Christmas tree
167
00:05:37,945 --> 00:05:41,583
How lovely are thy branches.
168
00:05:41,617 --> 00:05:43,045
O Christmas tree
169
00:05:43,071 --> 00:05:46,464
Jesus Christ. How many
presents does one kid need?
170
00:05:46,465 --> 00:05:47,732
We can't afford it!
171
00:05:47,765 --> 00:05:49,924
And then you go give money
to that filthy bum!
172
00:05:49,924 --> 00:05:51,291
It was the salvation army.
173
00:05:51,325 --> 00:05:54,796
[Scoffs] So a bum with a band uniform.
174
00:05:54,828 --> 00:05:56,797
Hey, Nate? I love you.
175
00:05:56,830 --> 00:05:59,366
You can't buy his love!
176
00:05:59,400 --> 00:06:01,469
And you can't buy mine, either!
177
00:06:01,501 --> 00:06:03,337
See this? You like what you see?
178
00:06:03,371 --> 00:06:06,306
Yeah, 'cause you're not gonna
see it again until march!
179
00:06:06,339 --> 00:06:08,142
I'm gonna step out for a bit, boy.
180
00:06:08,174 --> 00:06:09,477
Good! You get outta here
181
00:06:09,510 --> 00:06:11,479
and take your goddamned tree with you,
182
00:06:11,512 --> 00:06:13,481
you son of a bitch!
183
00:06:13,513 --> 00:06:14,982
Get out!
184
00:06:15,015 --> 00:06:18,018
Take your ugly face and never come back!
185
00:06:18,051 --> 00:06:22,756
[Crying] I hate you! Get out
of my house, you mother...
186
00:06:22,789 --> 00:06:25,058
Woman:
O, holy night
187
00:06:25,099 --> 00:06:27,747
the stars are brightly...
188
00:06:27,748 --> 00:06:29,684
You know, I like to think
that things have a way
189
00:06:29,717 --> 00:06:31,360
of working themselves
out on Christmas...
190
00:06:31,385 --> 00:06:32,219
I swear to god...
191
00:06:32,253 --> 00:06:34,322
Tourists: Scrooge!
Oh. Thank you! Thank you!
192
00:06:34,354 --> 00:06:35,890
Man: Thank you! Thank you!
193
00:06:35,922 --> 00:06:38,659
[All chattering]
194
00:06:38,693 --> 00:06:41,596
- Get outta here!
- Woman: Aah!
195
00:06:41,628 --> 00:06:42,996
Man: Scrooge is mad!
196
00:06:43,030 --> 00:06:44,265
197
00:06:45,296 --> 00:06:45,999
Oh! God!
198
00:06:46,032 --> 00:06:48,169
Oh, wow. Your dad must love this place.
199
00:06:48,201 --> 00:06:49,937
All right, Delilah, keep an eye out
200
00:06:49,970 --> 00:06:52,241
and let me know if you see
any FBI, any police, anything.
201
00:06:52,267 --> 00:06:53,535
- Just let me know, all right?
- Gotcha.
202
00:06:53,569 --> 00:06:54,938
- All right. Great.
- What's my job?
203
00:06:54,971 --> 00:06:56,141
Uh, you...
204
00:06:56,142 --> 00:06:58,012
Go get a pretzel and sit
on that bench right there.
205
00:06:58,045 --> 00:06:59,848
I'm gonna find your father.
206
00:06:59,880 --> 00:07:01,882
I won't let you down!
207
00:07:02,225 --> 00:07:03,527
My job's way better than yours.
208
00:07:03,553 --> 00:07:07,291
She only gave you that job 'cause
you're not smart enough for a real job.
209
00:07:07,324 --> 00:07:09,154
210
00:07:09,154 --> 00:07:10,856
Okay, but let me ask you this.
211
00:07:10,889 --> 00:07:12,540
If you could have one
wish on Christmas...
212
00:07:12,566 --> 00:07:12,824
Mm-hmm?
213
00:07:12,858 --> 00:07:13,812
What would it be?
214
00:07:13,813 --> 00:07:15,381
Some antifreeze for your sweet tea.
215
00:07:15,413 --> 00:07:16,748
216
00:07:16,788 --> 00:07:18,568
- Nate?
- Hmm?
217
00:07:18,595 --> 00:07:20,776
Babe! What are you doing here?
How did you find me?
218
00:07:20,802 --> 00:07:22,605
- I tracked your phone.
- What? How is that possible?
219
00:07:22,606 --> 00:07:24,208
- Family plan.
- We don't have the family plan.
220
00:07:24,224 --> 00:07:25,214
Do we need to do this right now?
221
00:07:25,241 --> 00:07:26,277
No, it's just, it's really expensive...
222
00:07:26,277 --> 00:07:27,276
I know, but I'm here.
Let's live in the moment.
223
00:07:27,301 --> 00:07:27,878
I know. I'm sorry, baby.
224
00:07:27,913 --> 00:07:28,923
I know. I am, too. I hated walking away.
225
00:07:28,948 --> 00:07:29,924
Oh, my god. Oh.
226
00:07:29,957 --> 00:07:31,152
- I hated the way that felt.
- Please, never again.
227
00:07:31,152 --> 00:07:33,171
- No, never. Mmm.
- Okay? Mmm.
228
00:07:33,578 --> 00:07:35,547
- Merry Christmas.
- Okay.
229
00:07:35,580 --> 00:07:36,131
Just... it's not...
230
00:07:36,157 --> 00:07:37,950
All right, I need you
to tell me everything.
231
00:07:37,976 --> 00:07:40,613
- I will, baby. Open book.
- Okay. Okay. Right now, though.
232
00:07:40,646 --> 00:07:42,949
- [Sighs deeply]
- [Sighs]
233
00:07:42,982 --> 00:07:48,288
234
00:07:48,978 --> 00:07:50,379
- I got...
- You got fired. Yeah, I know. I know.
235
00:07:50,413 --> 00:07:51,479
- How did you know?
- Vanessa.
236
00:07:51,480 --> 00:07:51,882
What?
237
00:07:51,908 --> 00:07:53,253
W... anyway, Vanessa says
you're in danger. What is that?
238
00:07:53,279 --> 00:07:55,521
- Oh, shit show. No. No.
- No?
239
00:07:55,547 --> 00:07:58,417
- I took something from work.
- Oh? What'd you take?
240
00:07:58,450 --> 00:08:00,320
- Huh?
- What did you take?
241
00:08:00,352 --> 00:08:02,354
242
00:08:02,388 --> 00:08:04,123
- I can't tell you.
- Mm, what?
243
00:08:04,155 --> 00:08:05,699
- Yet. Yet. I can't tell you yet.
- Why?
244
00:08:05,700 --> 00:08:07,785
I signed a nondisclosure agreement.
245
00:08:07,811 --> 00:08:09,070
Honey, you don't work there anymore!
246
00:08:09,103 --> 00:08:11,615
It had a very litigiously worded
noncompete clause.
247
00:08:11,656 --> 00:08:13,152
- Do you work for the CIA?
- No.
248
00:08:13,153 --> 00:08:13,553
No, no.
249
00:08:13,580 --> 00:08:14,755
But it's a highly
protected industry secret.
250
00:08:14,789 --> 00:08:15,957
They're just watching their backs.
251
00:08:15,989 --> 00:08:17,424
Oh, okay, so what you're saying
252
00:08:17,463 --> 00:08:18,527
is that I've been with
you over a decade,
253
00:08:18,528 --> 00:08:20,164
I give birth to your twins,
and I-I put up with your mother
254
00:08:20,196 --> 00:08:21,965
because I am a spy
255
00:08:21,999 --> 00:08:23,633
for a competing biotech
pharmaceutical company
256
00:08:23,667 --> 00:08:26,037
- or whatever it is you work for.
- It's just biotech...
257
00:08:26,070 --> 00:08:28,909
It's... you said you would
never walk away again! Baby!
258
00:08:28,942 --> 00:08:30,036
Why did I even come back?
259
00:08:30,036 --> 00:08:31,738
You're putting our children's
lives in danger?
260
00:08:31,771 --> 00:08:33,919
It's fine. I've got this
completely under control.
261
00:08:33,945 --> 00:08:35,480
- Do you, Nate? Really, do you?
- Yes.
262
00:08:35,513 --> 00:08:37,416
You're making a drop in a place
that has one viable exit.
263
00:08:37,449 --> 00:08:39,644
A drop? I'm picking up
a package from Vanessa.
264
00:08:39,670 --> 00:08:40,320
Oh, shit.
265
00:08:40,353 --> 00:08:41,487
- What?
- Stop. Stop.
266
00:08:41,520 --> 00:08:42,823
- What?
- Turn. Turn.
267
00:08:42,856 --> 00:08:44,825
- No, St... Just sit down.
- Why?
268
00:08:44,857 --> 00:08:45,738
- Down.
- What?
269
00:08:45,738 --> 00:08:47,006
Down. 7 o'clock.
270
00:08:47,185 --> 00:08:49,221
No. [Sighs] 7... 7 o'clock.
271
00:08:49,424 --> 00:08:51,024
Don't look, though.
But don't... don't look!
272
00:08:51,050 --> 00:08:51,593
What? What?
273
00:08:51,626 --> 00:08:53,328
I spotted him when we came in.
274
00:08:53,361 --> 00:08:54,997
He's like a robot. Every 30 seconds,
275
00:08:55,030 --> 00:08:58,333
he does the same thing.
Here we go. Paper down.
276
00:08:58,366 --> 00:08:59,535
Look around.
277
00:08:59,568 --> 00:09:01,203
Take a sip. Mm-hmm.
278
00:09:01,236 --> 00:09:02,671
Signal his team.
There it is. There it is!
279
00:09:02,704 --> 00:09:04,506
- That's a signal?
- Yeah.
280
00:09:04,539 --> 00:09:07,342
- His finger up his nose?
- Yeah. My god, this is insane.
281
00:09:07,374 --> 00:09:09,243
No, you are completely
overreacting here.
282
00:09:09,275 --> 00:09:10,476
Oh. I'm really... excuse me, sir?
Excuse me?
283
00:09:10,502 --> 00:09:10,922
Uh, yes.
284
00:09:11,060 --> 00:09:13,697
- Is this your daughter?
- Uh, yes.
285
00:09:13,731 --> 00:09:17,540
- How old is she?
- Um, uh... 7.
286
00:09:17,566 --> 00:09:19,436
7. Really, really adorable.
287
00:09:19,469 --> 00:09:21,037
- Thank you.
- Yeah.
288
00:09:21,070 --> 00:09:22,906
Man: Merry Christmas!
289
00:09:22,939 --> 00:09:24,575
[Lowered voice] He's doesn't
know how old his daughter is!
290
00:09:24,608 --> 00:09:26,243
- [Mouths words]
- I don't know how old my daughter is.
291
00:09:26,276 --> 00:09:29,378
- Yeah, I see you, too, asshole.
- What is your problem?
292
00:09:29,412 --> 00:09:31,415
This is your last chance, Nate.
Just tell me.
293
00:09:31,447 --> 00:09:33,549
Misfortune seemed his lot
294
00:09:33,583 --> 00:09:37,221
-
he got into a drifted bank
- I can't!
295
00:09:37,253 --> 00:09:39,388
Oh, come on. Really? Silent treatment?
296
00:09:39,421 --> 00:09:42,459
Because I won't talk to you
about something?
297
00:09:42,492 --> 00:09:44,962
Is... is your silent treatment
N.D.A. certified?
298
00:09:44,994 --> 00:09:46,330
Jared and Delilah: Dad!
299
00:09:46,363 --> 00:09:47,731
Oh, hey, hey!
300
00:09:47,763 --> 00:09:49,398
There's my kids!
301
00:09:49,431 --> 00:09:50,600
- Mmm! How are you guys?
- [Kisses]
302
00:09:50,633 --> 00:09:52,503
- No government goons yet.
- [Mouths word]
303
00:09:52,536 --> 00:09:54,505
- Oh, my god. No one is after me!
- Yes, they are.
304
00:09:54,538 --> 00:09:56,217
No, they're not! We are
meeting Vanessa here.
305
00:09:56,218 --> 00:09:58,516
She is gonna give me a product,
which I cannot tell you about.
306
00:09:58,542 --> 00:09:59,067
Yes, you can.
307
00:09:59,187 --> 00:10:00,755
And we're gonna be on the
beach before you know it.
308
00:10:00,781 --> 00:10:01,884
I have a better idea.
309
00:10:01,884 --> 00:10:04,771
Since everyone loves
Christmas... everyone...
310
00:10:04,797 --> 00:10:06,767
Let's have some, like, cake,
some pies and milkshakes
311
00:10:06,806 --> 00:10:07,837
and all that good stuff with mom.
312
00:10:07,837 --> 00:10:08,884
- Oh, come on. Don't do that.
- Yeah?
313
00:10:08,885 --> 00:10:10,268
If we're gonna eat, we're
gonna eat as a family.
314
00:10:10,294 --> 00:10:10,769
Oh, no, I'm sorry.
315
00:10:10,802 --> 00:10:12,772
I'm not speaking to you
or eating with you
316
00:10:12,805 --> 00:10:14,541
- until you tell me everything.
- Woman: Okay, everybody, follow me!
317
00:10:15,308 --> 00:10:17,898
Oh, and by the way, kids,
I'm lifting the soda ban, so...
318
00:10:17,924 --> 00:10:20,761
Oh. You're giving them
the gift of diabetes.
319
00:10:20,794 --> 00:10:22,728
Jingle bells, jingle bells
320
00:10:22,762 --> 00:10:24,897
- [elf humming "jingle bells"]
-
jingle all the way
321
00:10:24,930 --> 00:10:27,383
- where to sit? Where to sit?
- Can we sit with dad?
322
00:10:27,383 --> 00:10:29,331
- I'd rather not.
- Why not?
323
00:10:29,332 --> 00:10:31,439
Dad, why can't we sit
with mom and Delilah?
324
00:10:31,465 --> 00:10:33,871
I'm not sure your mom's
in a jolly enough mood to.
325
00:10:33,905 --> 00:10:36,319
- I want them to.
- Yeah, me, too.
326
00:10:36,345 --> 00:10:37,813
And you are welcome to.
327
00:10:37,847 --> 00:10:39,649
Well, tell your father
we would be happy to sit,
328
00:10:39,681 --> 00:10:42,309
only because there is
no other place to sit.
329
00:10:42,335 --> 00:10:42,844
Mm.
330
00:10:42,844 --> 00:10:44,646
Do I really need to
repeat that sentence?
331
00:10:44,679 --> 00:10:47,072
Please, I am way too
tired to play this game.
332
00:10:47,098 --> 00:10:49,567
Hi, folks! This seat taken?
333
00:10:49,599 --> 00:10:51,091
- No.
- Yes.
334
00:10:51,091 --> 00:10:52,860
- Think I could just squeeze in here?
- Yeah. Take it.
335
00:10:52,893 --> 00:10:54,361
- Oh, you think?
- Yeah, sure.
336
00:10:54,394 --> 00:10:55,864
[Strained voice] Think you can make it?
337
00:10:55,897 --> 00:10:57,364
- There we go!
- Oh, there he goes.
338
00:10:57,397 --> 00:10:58,867
[Chuckles] Nothing beats a holiday meal
339
00:10:58,899 --> 00:11:01,101
with family and new friends!
340
00:11:01,134 --> 00:11:03,270
America! [Laughs]
341
00:11:03,566 --> 00:11:05,535
Look, I know it's hard
to understand, let alone accept,
342
00:11:05,569 --> 00:11:07,137
- but...
- Do you hear that noise?
343
00:11:07,170 --> 00:11:09,040
Jared, could you please tell that noise
344
00:11:09,073 --> 00:11:10,808
- that I've decided I can't hear anything...
- [Scoffs]
345
00:11:10,840 --> 00:11:12,709
Until I get a full and
complete explanation?
346
00:11:12,742 --> 00:11:13,512
Did you get that?
347
00:11:13,513 --> 00:11:15,743
Yes, I heard all that
passive-aggressive B.S.
348
00:11:15,769 --> 00:11:17,153
- loud and clear.
- Oh, that wasn't passive.
349
00:11:17,154 --> 00:11:18,224
Sorry about the awkwardness.
350
00:11:18,224 --> 00:11:20,798
- It's day one of their maybe divorce.
- Okay, you know what?
351
00:11:20,798 --> 00:11:23,503
I'm gonna let your translators
go buy themselves a toy
352
00:11:23,529 --> 00:11:25,331
so we can actually talk like adults.
353
00:11:25,363 --> 00:11:27,532
Oh, well, then I'm going
to buy them an even bigger toy.
354
00:11:27,565 --> 00:11:28,143
Oh, what are you doing?
355
00:11:28,169 --> 00:11:29,401
There you go, sweetheart.
You're so welcome.
356
00:11:29,434 --> 00:11:31,736
- That is so stupid.
- No, you're stupid.
357
00:11:31,770 --> 00:11:33,524
- Excuse me?
- You're stupid.
358
00:11:33,525 --> 00:11:35,933
This relationship was built
on one bedrock principle,
359
00:11:35,965 --> 00:11:37,785
and you have managed to
completely unravel that bedrock
360
00:11:37,785 --> 00:11:38,269
in less than a week.
361
00:11:38,295 --> 00:11:39,721
Okay, first of all, bedrock crumbles.
It doesn't unravel.
362
00:11:39,756 --> 00:11:41,057
Oh, I'm so sorry, professor of rocks!
363
00:11:41,089 --> 00:11:42,725
And secondly, I think
our marriage is built
364
00:11:42,759 --> 00:11:43,994
on something more than
me not telling you
365
00:11:44,026 --> 00:11:45,895
one tiny, insignificant detail!
366
00:11:45,929 --> 00:11:50,029
Okay. Okay. Looks like someone
here is on the naughty list.
367
00:11:50,055 --> 00:11:51,258
- Am I right?
- Yeah.
368
00:11:51,264 --> 00:11:52,565
Now come on, folks.
369
00:11:52,591 --> 00:11:55,035
We are here to celebrate Christmas
370
00:11:55,061 --> 00:11:56,134
every day of the year.
371
00:11:56,134 --> 00:11:58,828
See, every day is the most special day.
372
00:11:58,861 --> 00:12:00,386
That is not how special works.
373
00:12:00,411 --> 00:12:02,052
Maybe I should just
sit on the other side.
374
00:12:02,078 --> 00:12:02,518
You think?
375
00:12:02,551 --> 00:12:04,469
- That'll be... yeah. [Sighs]
- Yeah? Good idea?
376
00:12:04,470 --> 00:12:06,021
- Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hey.
- What?
377
00:12:06,027 --> 00:12:07,073
Who do you work for
and why are you packing?
378
00:12:07,074 --> 00:12:07,967
- This?
- Yes.
379
00:12:07,968 --> 00:12:10,181
Oh, I keep this to keep
our government honest.
380
00:12:10,207 --> 00:12:10,723
[Gun thuds]
381
00:12:10,756 --> 00:12:12,815
Whoa! What is wrong with you?!
There's children here!
382
00:12:12,841 --> 00:12:13,912
They are safer now.
383
00:12:13,938 --> 00:12:14,764
No!
384
00:12:14,790 --> 00:12:18,025
No! They are statistically
way less safe now!
385
00:12:18,119 --> 00:12:19,383
Our founding fathers knew how...
386
00:12:19,383 --> 00:12:21,055
Our founding fathers
would shit their pants
387
00:12:21,056 --> 00:12:22,488
if they saw what this gun could do.
388
00:12:22,488 --> 00:12:24,756
- The constitution is the oldest...
- Is in dire need of an update.
389
00:12:24,782 --> 00:12:26,432
It's the most sacred
document ever written.
390
00:12:26,458 --> 00:12:28,716
This "sacred document"?
It's been amended 27 times!
391
00:12:28,742 --> 00:12:30,761
And then those amendments
have been amended.
392
00:12:30,787 --> 00:12:32,923
- See you later, slavery.
- Yeah, hello, women's suffrage.
393
00:12:32,956 --> 00:12:34,792
- Goodbye, alcohol.
- [Deep voice] Welcome back, alcohol.
394
00:12:34,825 --> 00:12:36,927
- This guy.
- This stupid guy!
395
00:12:36,959 --> 00:12:38,305
- Me?
- Yes!
396
00:12:38,305 --> 00:12:38,977
Yeah.
397
00:12:38,977 --> 00:12:41,955
You two have ruined my
entire Christmas dinner!
398
00:12:41,989 --> 00:12:43,456
Jeez!
399
00:12:44,023 --> 00:12:45,779
- Your gun!
- Take it! Take your gun!
400
00:12:45,780 --> 00:12:47,180
I know! You've got me all flustered.
401
00:12:47,789 --> 00:12:50,425
Yeah. Responsible gun owner.
402
00:12:50,458 --> 00:12:52,827
403
00:12:52,861 --> 00:12:54,830
You see?
404
00:12:54,862 --> 00:12:56,364
We still have our love
405
00:12:56,398 --> 00:12:58,267
of chastising people we disagree with.
406
00:12:58,299 --> 00:13:00,669
I'm still mad at you.
407
00:13:00,702 --> 00:13:02,833
- Yeah, but you're way more mad at him.
- For sure.
408
00:13:02,834 --> 00:13:05,498
Guys! I saw them! Goons!
409
00:13:05,524 --> 00:13:07,192
They were showing around
a picture of dad,
410
00:13:07,226 --> 00:13:09,162
asking if anyone had seen him.
411
00:13:09,194 --> 00:13:10,887
- Shit! What are they doing here?
- See?
412
00:13:10,888 --> 00:13:12,790
I'm sor... I'm sorry!
What do we do? What do we do?
413
00:13:12,822 --> 00:13:14,391
Well, the good news is, the one
thing we have going for us
414
00:13:14,425 --> 00:13:16,060
- is they don't know you're here.
- Great. Great.
415
00:13:16,093 --> 00:13:18,729
- Yeah.
- Dad, this guy knows you!
416
00:13:18,762 --> 00:13:20,340
417
00:13:20,593 --> 00:13:23,511
- He's such an idiot!
- Morris: Nate!
418
00:13:23,511 --> 00:13:26,482
Shit! Go! Go! Just go!
Go, go, go! Go, go!
419
00:13:26,515 --> 00:13:27,750
Got to eat it.
420
00:13:27,782 --> 00:13:30,552
421
00:13:33,554 --> 00:13:36,638
Woman:
every day is Christmas
422
00:13:36,639 --> 00:13:38,908
- welcome!
-
with I-o-v-e
423
00:13:38,941 --> 00:13:41,210
- ho, ho, ho, ho, ho!
-
I-o-v-e
424
00:13:41,243 --> 00:13:43,613
every day is Christmas
425
00:13:43,647 --> 00:13:45,349
with I-o-v-e...
426
00:13:45,382 --> 00:13:46,537
Listen, here's the play.
427
00:13:46,537 --> 00:13:47,972
She and I are gonna throw some kind of
428
00:13:48,006 --> 00:13:48,855
- mother-daughter hissy fit.
- Yeah.
429
00:13:48,855 --> 00:13:50,873
And that should give you plenty of time
to make the drop to Vanessa.
430
00:13:50,873 --> 00:13:52,642
- Everybody got it? Everybody clear?
- Got it.
431
00:13:52,675 --> 00:13:54,701
- What do I do?
- Go get a pretzel. Another one. Yeah.
432
00:13:54,701 --> 00:13:57,029
Great. Go. Bye. Bye-bye.
433
00:13:57,357 --> 00:13:59,059
I am the ghost of Christmas past!
434
00:13:59,093 --> 00:14:00,627
- Hey! Terrific. Tell me all about it.
- Really?
435
00:14:00,660 --> 00:14:01,823
- Yeah.
- Oh!
436
00:14:01,823 --> 00:14:02,981
- Uh-huh.
- Oh! Oh, this is great.
437
00:14:02,982 --> 00:14:04,715
Okay, well, it all started
in the north pole, right?
438
00:14:04,741 --> 00:14:05,442
Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
439
00:14:05,475 --> 00:14:06,586
And give you a little
taste of Christmas joy.
440
00:14:06,612 --> 00:14:07,310
Yeah. Uh-huh. Okay. Okay.
441
00:14:07,342 --> 00:14:10,356
Right near the north pole.
But wait, I'm not done!
442
00:14:10,382 --> 00:14:12,853
Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho!
443
00:14:12,886 --> 00:14:15,279
- So what's your name, little boy?
- Jareb.
444
00:14:15,280 --> 00:14:17,349
Well, tell me, Jareb, what would
you like for Christmas?
445
00:14:17,382 --> 00:14:19,184
I'm good on presents.
446
00:14:19,218 --> 00:14:20,853
[Instrumental "angels we have
heard on high" playing]
447
00:14:20,886 --> 00:14:21,962
Am I dumb?
448
00:14:21,988 --> 00:14:25,190
Ooh. That's a lot to
unpack there, Jareb.
449
00:14:25,223 --> 00:14:28,294
I don't think you should
ever call yourself dumb.
450
00:14:28,327 --> 00:14:30,196
What if I am dumb?
451
00:14:30,228 --> 00:14:31,663
You know, it's funny you bring this up.
452
00:14:31,923 --> 00:14:33,759
But I was on my bathroom break earlier,
453
00:14:33,801 --> 00:14:35,536
and I was reading this article that said
454
00:14:35,569 --> 00:14:38,440
that people who had a more
accurate view of the world
455
00:14:38,473 --> 00:14:40,575
tended to be more depressed.
456
00:14:40,608 --> 00:14:42,511
And that's why I think
we need to hang on
457
00:14:42,544 --> 00:14:45,322
to the fantasies in life
that make us feel happier.
458
00:14:45,322 --> 00:14:47,625
- Is that really true?
- It is true.
459
00:14:47,657 --> 00:14:50,193
Santa does number twos.
460
00:14:50,227 --> 00:14:55,366
Well... I guess that's
one takeaway from that story.
461
00:14:55,398 --> 00:14:58,301
[Elf humming]
462
00:14:58,341 --> 00:15:00,944
- I'm not a horrible child!
- You are...
463
00:15:00,970 --> 00:15:02,010
You're so mean!
464
00:15:02,011 --> 00:15:04,787
You don't know my middle name!
You never hug my Teddy bear!
465
00:15:04,787 --> 00:15:05,698
Excuse me, little girl.
466
00:15:05,724 --> 00:15:07,995
You can't push me! You're
not my mommy either!
467
00:15:08,021 --> 00:15:09,406
- [Morris speaks indistinctly]
- [High-pitched screaming]
468
00:15:09,407 --> 00:15:11,481
Oh, lord. Can you take
the battery out of her?
469
00:15:11,507 --> 00:15:12,032
Uhh! Oh!
470
00:15:12,065 --> 00:15:13,900
- Morris: Hey, let's... let's go.
- [Continues screaming]
471
00:15:13,932 --> 00:15:15,835
Go. [Groans]
472
00:15:15,868 --> 00:15:17,939
- [Panting]
- Okay. Yeah, okay. That was great.
473
00:15:17,965 --> 00:15:20,969
[Playing slow-tempo rock ballad]
474
00:15:24,071 --> 00:15:27,374
Some guys like Muhammed
475
00:15:27,407 --> 00:15:30,478
Some girls like Buddha
476
00:15:30,510 --> 00:15:33,696
Some look to L. Ron
477
00:15:33,722 --> 00:15:36,383
I say coulda, shoulda, woulda
478
00:15:36,417 --> 00:15:38,386
Say goodbye to your sons...
479
00:15:38,418 --> 00:15:40,020
This isn't right Nate,
480
00:15:40,053 --> 00:15:42,556
putting it out in the
world for god to see.
481
00:15:42,590 --> 00:15:44,024
God, what is wrong with you?
Put it down.
482
00:15:44,057 --> 00:15:45,456
What's the matter with you?
483
00:15:45,457 --> 00:15:48,068
He, or should I say her,
is going to judge you.
484
00:15:48,069 --> 00:15:49,970
Why do you always have
to make this about you
485
00:15:50,004 --> 00:15:51,304
and your stupid, insane life?
486
00:15:51,304 --> 00:15:52,540
I have to go to sound check.
487
00:15:52,574 --> 00:15:53,776
Why? You don't play an instrument.
488
00:15:53,809 --> 00:15:55,611
- Tambourine.
- That's not an instrument.
489
00:15:55,643 --> 00:15:57,445
- It's a percussion.
- It's not... give me the package.
490
00:15:57,478 --> 00:15:59,714
- You'd like that, wouldn't you, huh?
- Hey, hey, hey!
491
00:15:59,748 --> 00:16:01,450
Is everyone having a Merry
Christmas over here?
492
00:16:01,457 --> 00:16:02,120
Tourists: Scrooge!
493
00:16:02,146 --> 00:16:04,777
How many times do I have
to tell you to buzz off?
494
00:16:04,777 --> 00:16:05,285
What's in the package?
495
00:16:05,286 --> 00:16:06,458
- It's drugs.
- It's not drugs!
496
00:16:06,458 --> 00:16:08,505
Okay, we're gonna need backup
at Cheery Lane.
497
00:16:08,506 --> 00:16:10,970
Hey, sir, you're gonna need
to hand that package over to me.
498
00:16:10,996 --> 00:16:12,895
I am gonna tell you for the last time,
499
00:16:12,921 --> 00:16:15,491
[bleep] You and [Bleep] Christmas.
500
00:16:15,523 --> 00:16:18,995
- [Sprays]
- [Screaming] Ow!
501
00:16:19,028 --> 00:16:21,797
- Are you okay?
- Aah!
502
00:16:21,830 --> 00:16:22,489
Tourists: Scrooge!
503
00:16:22,515 --> 00:16:24,466
[Voice breaks] I really couldn't...
no, don't film me.
504
00:16:24,499 --> 00:16:25,100
Aah!
505
00:16:25,126 --> 00:16:26,902
Oh, my god, Nate. I'm so
sorry we couldn't hold them.
506
00:16:26,935 --> 00:16:28,108
- I'm so sorry, Honey.
- [Cries]
507
00:16:28,134 --> 00:16:29,913
- Are you crying?
- [Voice breaks] No, it's no crying.
508
00:16:29,913 --> 00:16:31,973
- Oh, my god. Are you crying again?
- It's chemicals!
509
00:16:31,999 --> 00:16:33,903
- It's tears.
- Mr. Parker, you're in possession
510
00:16:33,936 --> 00:16:36,138
of P.F.R. intellectual property
that we are here to collect.
511
00:16:36,164 --> 00:16:38,134
Code candy cane. Code candy cane.
512
00:16:38,166 --> 00:16:40,168
Okay, security's just gonna be a second.
513
00:16:40,208 --> 00:16:41,012
No need for that.
514
00:16:41,013 --> 00:16:42,815
Look, Nate, just give us
the stuff, Honey.
515
00:16:42,848 --> 00:16:44,049
- We'll be on our way.
- I can't.
516
00:16:44,081 --> 00:16:45,383
- What is it?
- It's drugs.
517
00:16:45,416 --> 00:16:47,364
- It's not drugs!
- Then what is it?
518
00:16:47,390 --> 00:16:49,359
Don't answer that. Gene will
bury you in litigation.
519
00:16:49,391 --> 00:16:51,294
I need you to tell me
what this is, okay?
520
00:16:51,328 --> 00:16:53,130
- I know, but...
- I can't tell you. I can't tell you.
521
00:16:53,163 --> 00:16:54,630
It's me. Honey, it's us.
You can tell me.
522
00:16:54,664 --> 00:16:55,521
- I don't wanna get in trouble.
- You tell them.
523
00:16:55,521 --> 00:16:57,120
All right! What's happening here?
524
00:16:57,146 --> 00:16:58,948
- [Gasps loudly] These guys! I told you!
- You didn't say the elf was.
525
00:16:58,954 --> 00:17:00,656
- Are you serious?
- What?
526
00:17:00,689 --> 00:17:02,324
- What are the contents of that bag?
- It's my bag.
527
00:17:02,358 --> 00:17:04,646
- Boys, can we discuss this in private?
- What's in the bag?!
528
00:17:04,672 --> 00:17:05,906
- It's drugs!
- Just give 'em the drugs!
529
00:17:05,948 --> 00:17:07,753
- It's not drugs!
- I got this!
530
00:17:07,753 --> 00:17:09,955
- Nate: Whoa! No!
- Who's the bad guy here, huh?
531
00:17:09,981 --> 00:17:11,486
- Oh, are you the bad guy?
- No, you are!
532
00:17:11,512 --> 00:17:13,182
- It was him. He caused all of this.
- Vanessa!
533
00:17:13,214 --> 00:17:14,582
All right, no more dicking around.
534
00:17:14,615 --> 00:17:16,417
- Lower your weapon!
- Tell us what's in the bag!
535
00:17:16,451 --> 00:17:17,517
It's not what you think it is.
536
00:17:17,518 --> 00:17:18,970
You will not tell them
what the product is.
537
00:17:18,970 --> 00:17:20,651
- [Whispers] Just tell me what it is.
- Man: Lower the gun!
538
00:17:20,677 --> 00:17:22,053
Morris: P.F.R. N.D.A.
declares confidential
539
00:17:22,054 --> 00:17:23,589
and/or proprietary information,
shall include all material
540
00:17:23,590 --> 00:17:25,218
that has or could have
commercial value or...
541
00:17:25,244 --> 00:17:25,760
What?!
542
00:17:25,793 --> 00:17:28,925
- Morris: Disclosing party is engaged.
- That's what this is about?
543
00:17:28,951 --> 00:17:31,930
-
Lord Jesus.
- [All shouting inaudibly]
544
00:17:31,930 --> 00:17:34,796
You please us
545
00:17:34,822 --> 00:17:37,859
Just teach us
546
00:17:37,891 --> 00:17:40,861
Come seize us
547
00:17:40,895 --> 00:17:44,032
Leave me speechless
548
00:17:44,064 --> 00:17:51,205
My Jesus!
549
00:17:51,236 --> 00:17:52,973
- [Clank, feedback whines]
- Nate: No!
550
00:17:53,005 --> 00:17:54,707
Everybody, stop!
551
00:17:54,741 --> 00:17:56,609
- Look in Santa's bag!
- [Crowd gasps and murmurs]
552
00:17:56,642 --> 00:17:58,611
It's just some weed. It's for my gout.
553
00:17:58,645 --> 00:18:02,516
- [Gunshot]
- Oh! Damn! Christmas morning!
554
00:18:02,549 --> 00:18:04,551
Everybody, put your weapons down.
555
00:18:04,583 --> 00:18:07,987
- It's just hand sanitizer.
- Okay.
556
00:18:08,021 --> 00:18:09,598
You have got to be shitting me.
557
00:18:09,598 --> 00:18:11,534
- It wasn't just hand sanitizer.
- Mm-hmm.
558
00:18:11,566 --> 00:18:13,626
It was an industrial
strength prototype.
559
00:18:13,725 --> 00:18:14,824
[Clicks pen]
560
00:18:15,437 --> 00:18:16,805
That stuff doesn't even work.
561
00:18:16,839 --> 00:18:19,978
I'm sorry, what part
of "99.9% effective"
562
00:18:20,004 --> 00:18:22,774
suggests that it doesn't work?
Are you a [Bleep] scientist?
563
00:18:22,808 --> 00:18:25,011
- Well, soap and water works better.
- Yeah, I know it works better.
564
00:18:25,048 --> 00:18:26,246
But what about the areas of the world
565
00:18:26,272 --> 00:18:28,733
with limited potable water that
has to be saved for consumption?
566
00:18:28,733 --> 00:18:30,033
Okay, what about that then?
567
00:18:30,067 --> 00:18:32,570
Okay, hand sanitizer's impor'ant.
568
00:18:32,602 --> 00:18:34,972
Yes, it is impor'ant.
569
00:18:35,005 --> 00:18:37,809
Okay? And that's what this is all about.
570
00:18:37,841 --> 00:18:40,978
P.F.R. has added dangerous
levels of chemicals
571
00:18:41,012 --> 00:18:43,648
to their product to give society what?
572
00:18:43,680 --> 00:18:47,718
.1% more?!
573
00:18:47,752 --> 00:18:48,919
That's wrong!
574
00:18:48,953 --> 00:18:50,088
[Hands hit lap, crowd gasps]
575
00:18:50,120 --> 00:18:54,292
And what's wrong is wrong.
576
00:18:54,324 --> 00:18:56,894
- [Hands hit lap]
- [Crying] I'm right.
577
00:18:56,927 --> 00:18:58,162
Woman: Oh, sad dad.
578
00:18:58,196 --> 00:19:00,732
- [Crying] I was right.
- Man: Aw.
579
00:19:00,764 --> 00:19:02,734
Could somebody call a doctor?
580
00:19:02,766 --> 00:19:05,437
- Nate: Oh, my god! Oh, shit!
- Oh! Oh, my god! Oh!
581
00:19:05,438 --> 00:19:06,806
- Nate: Oh, god.
- Robin: That whole area...
582
00:19:06,840 --> 00:19:08,909
You're missing your toe. [Crying]
583
00:19:11,591 --> 00:19:13,460
[Cheering]
584
00:19:13,819 --> 00:19:16,111
[Amplified voice] Everybody,
I want you to lower your phones
585
00:19:16,118 --> 00:19:17,857
- and take a selfie with god.
- [Microphone feedback whines]
586
00:19:17,857 --> 00:19:21,685
He retweets your victories
and unfollows your sins.
587
00:19:21,711 --> 00:19:22,979
[Rattling]
588
00:19:23,012 --> 00:19:26,081
_
589
00:19:26,115 --> 00:19:30,453
- [Caleb singing indistinctly]
- [Sighs deeply]
590
00:19:30,485 --> 00:19:31,987
Maybe we should just go home.
591
00:19:32,021 --> 00:19:34,153
There's no point in going to the
conference without the sample.
592
00:19:34,153 --> 00:19:37,323
- I have a present for you.
- What's this?
593
00:19:37,349 --> 00:19:38,651
The drugs.
594
00:19:38,684 --> 00:19:40,850
Just say goodbye to your uncle...
595
00:19:40,897 --> 00:19:42,232
How did you get this?
596
00:19:42,264 --> 00:19:43,785
597
00:19:43,785 --> 00:19:46,889
Everybody, stop! Look in Santa's bag!
598
00:19:46,923 --> 00:19:48,892
Santa: It's just some weed.
It's for my gout.
599
00:19:48,924 --> 00:19:50,505
Kid's a dummy.
600
00:19:50,506 --> 00:19:53,175
How awesome is this guy? Huh?
He just saved my job.
601
00:19:53,678 --> 00:19:56,547
I gotta admit, that was pretty smart.
602
00:19:56,581 --> 00:19:58,217
603
00:19:58,249 --> 00:20:00,818
You know, maybe I've got
this Christmas thing all wrong.
604
00:20:00,852 --> 00:20:02,988
Maybe it's just who you spend it with.
605
00:20:03,020 --> 00:20:05,556
Speaking of which, what do
we do about the shit show?
606
00:20:05,589 --> 00:20:06,736
Oh, I say we leave her.
607
00:20:06,737 --> 00:20:08,305
I think the structure
will be good for her.
608
00:20:08,336 --> 00:20:10,606
[Caleb sings indistinctly]
609
00:20:10,640 --> 00:20:12,941
It's...
610
00:20:12,975 --> 00:20:16,379
This is truly the best Christmas ever.
611
00:20:16,412 --> 00:20:19,215
Merry Christmas.
612
00:20:19,248 --> 00:20:21,651
Mm.
613
00:20:21,683 --> 00:20:23,652
614
00:20:23,685 --> 00:20:27,489
Jesus Christ, you must love this song.
615
00:20:27,523 --> 00:20:29,859
Come seize us
616
00:20:29,892 --> 00:20:32,828
Leave me speechless
617
00:20:32,862 --> 00:20:41,037
My Jesus!
618
00:20:42,263 --> 00:20:45,528
- Synced and corrected by hawken45 -
- www.addic7ed.com -
619
00:20:45,578 --> 00:20:50,128
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