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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:33,058 --> 00:00:35,456 月圓之夜 2 00:00:36,092 --> 00:00:38,489 紫禁之巔 3 00:00:38,725 --> 00:00:41,247 一劍西來 4 00:00:41,358 --> 00:00:45,018 天外飛僊 5 00:01:03,057 --> 00:01:06,080 今日有幸,見到當代兩大劍客決鬥 6 00:01:06,124 --> 00:01:09,022 我陸小鳳與你花滿樓,都不枉此生了 7 00:01:09,056 --> 00:01:12,682 是呀,西門吹雪和葉孤城兩人的寶劍 尚未出鞘 8 00:01:12,724 --> 00:01:15,053 劍氣已經瀰漫四周了 9 00:01:15,090 --> 00:01:18,079 此劍乃海外寒劍精英,吹毛斷髮 10 00:01:18,123 --> 00:01:21,089 劍鋒三尺三,淨重六斤四兩 11 00:01:21,123 --> 00:01:22,520 此劍乃天下利器 12 00:01:22,556 --> 00:01:25,488 劍鋒三尺七寸,淨重七斤十三兩 13 00:01:25,522 --> 00:01:29,011 西門吹雪 你有沒有把握接我這招天外飛僊? 14 00:01:29,056 --> 00:01:32,180 葉城主,我已經準備好了 15 00:01:38,055 --> 00:01:39,021 天 16 00:01:41,222 --> 00:01:42,449 外 17 00:01:44,456 --> 00:01:45,422 飛 18 00:01:47,155 --> 00:01:48,450 僊 19 00:01:52,622 --> 00:01:53,315 什麼人? 20 00:01:53,355 --> 00:01:56,048 是誰這麼大膽敢在 皇上屋頂打架?報上名來 21 00:01:56,255 --> 00:01:58,778 在下白雲城主葉孤城 22 00:02:00,755 --> 00:02:03,050 葉孤城?! 23 00:02:03,288 --> 00:02:09,187 還有我,冷如冰,寒如雪 劍客西門吹雪 24 00:02:10,520 --> 00:02:15,010 還有我,風流盲俠花滿樓 25 00:02:15,520 --> 00:02:20,145 還有我四條眉毛 人見人愛,陸小鳳! 26 00:02:21,053 --> 00:02:25,179 阿…陸…小鳳呀 27 00:02:27,487 --> 00:02:30,009 人見人愛呀?! 28 00:02:31,153 --> 00:02:33,516 你可知你妨礙了兩大高手決鬥? 29 00:02:33,553 --> 00:02:34,576 你是什麼人? 30 00:02:34,620 --> 00:02:36,246 保龍一族,靈靈發 31 00:02:36,287 --> 00:02:39,980 負責秘密保護皇上 還有保護皇宮內外一切產業 32 00:02:40,020 --> 00:02:45,008 現在聽著,陸小鳳、花滿樓 葉孤城、西門吹雪 33 00:02:45,052 --> 00:02:47,644 你們幾個老傢伙居然闖入私人禁地 34 00:02:47,686 --> 00:02:49,117 非法集會 35 00:02:49,152 --> 00:02:50,516 罪名是在公共地方行為不檢 36 00:02:50,553 --> 00:02:53,110 你不要老傢伙長老傢伙短的 37 00:02:53,152 --> 00:02:55,277 高手不一定要長得多英俊 38 00:02:55,319 --> 00:02:59,512 只不過是你們這些 星斗市民一廂情願的想法罷了 39 00:02:59,552 --> 00:03:02,018 是呀!難道大俠就不能禿頭嗎? 40 00:03:02,052 --> 00:03:05,381 也沒有像你們這麼不修邊幅的 41 00:03:08,685 --> 00:03:10,082 給我們一條生路吧? 42 00:03:10,818 --> 00:03:13,284 這是絕版獨家秘笈呀,拿去! 43 00:03:13,318 --> 00:03:15,079 送給你!快點開鎖呀 44 00:03:15,252 --> 00:03:19,082 就憑你這本爛書就想脫身? 做夢呀你! 45 00:03:19,484 --> 00:03:20,711 我葉孤城的名號你沒聽過? 46 00:03:20,751 --> 00:03:23,047 當然沒聽過啦,你不是很有名!閃開 47 00:03:23,085 --> 00:03:27,312 小老弟,給個面子 好歹我也是西… 48 00:03:27,351 --> 00:03:30,181 就是因為你不是東西! 所以我不給你面子 49 00:03:30,317 --> 00:03:33,078 混蛋,我是中原第一盲俠 50 00:03:35,084 --> 00:03:36,982 盲了就不要學人家爬得那麼高啦 51 00:03:37,017 --> 00:03:38,778 會摔死的!老伯! 52 00:03:39,217 --> 00:03:42,740 太過份了 我陸小鳳只要靈犀一指你就… 53 00:03:42,783 --> 00:03:47,113 我也會呀!一指呀 看到沒有?好好學著! 54 00:03:47,283 --> 00:03:49,977 全部趴下,雙手放在頭上 55 00:03:50,017 --> 00:03:53,039 少說派你們坐個十年八年的牢 56 00:03:53,083 --> 00:03:54,606 這一次真的不會放過你們了 57 00:03:54,650 --> 00:03:56,115 真是沒面子 58 00:03:56,149 --> 00:03:58,308 各位兄弟,我們不要跟他一般見識 59 00:03:58,350 --> 00:03:59,680 不如改日再戰 60 00:04:08,649 --> 00:04:10,342 這麼厲害?! 61 00:06:22,410 --> 00:06:24,773 保龍一族成員 62 00:06:24,810 --> 00:06:26,106 靈靈恭 63 00:06:26,710 --> 00:06:28,074 靈靈喜 64 00:06:28,376 --> 00:06:29,399 靈靈發 65 00:06:30,110 --> 00:06:31,167 靈靈財 66 00:06:31,743 --> 00:06:35,573 誓死效忠皇上 67 00:06:36,043 --> 00:06:38,031 誓死效忠皇上 68 00:06:44,009 --> 00:06:45,066 鐵布衫 69 00:06:52,142 --> 00:06:54,233 衣服破了 是呀… 70 00:07:22,107 --> 00:07:24,130 好… 71 00:07:36,040 --> 00:07:37,165 碎石腳 72 00:07:51,673 --> 00:07:52,661 五形拳 73 00:07:53,106 --> 00:07:53,663 龍 74 00:07:54,440 --> 00:07:55,201 蛇 75 00:07:56,540 --> 00:07:57,369 虎 76 00:07:58,006 --> 00:07:58,664 豹 77 00:07:58,772 --> 00:07:59,738 鶴 78 00:08:22,005 --> 00:08:22,629 好! 79 00:08:47,437 --> 00:08:48,369 幹什麼? 80 00:08:48,670 --> 00:08:51,034 這兩塊石頭產於北方極地之下 81 00:08:51,071 --> 00:08:53,332 共分兩面,有神奇的力量 82 00:08:53,370 --> 00:08:55,700 陽面和陽面在一起會同性相拒 83 00:08:55,737 --> 00:08:57,032 不能互碰 84 00:08:57,070 --> 00:08:59,502 而陰面跟陽面在一起就會異性相吸 85 00:08:59,537 --> 00:09:01,093 非常神奇 86 00:09:01,136 --> 00:09:03,295 實在是一個重大的發現 87 00:09:03,704 --> 00:09:06,363 微臣想將它獻給皇上 88 00:09:06,403 --> 00:09:08,028 這有什麼用呀? 89 00:09:11,636 --> 00:09:15,125 上面兩位宮女 以後就不用搖扇子搖得那麼辛苦了 90 00:09:15,170 --> 00:09:17,635 剛剛兩塊不合適,現在看看這一個 91 00:09:18,003 --> 00:09:19,559 將這兩塊葉子連在一起 92 00:09:19,603 --> 00:09:21,432 再用雙手快速轉動 93 00:09:21,469 --> 00:09:25,026 就會造成強烈的氣流,形成旋風 94 00:09:29,502 --> 00:09:32,797 你說,天氣熱的時候 有一把這個東西,不是挺好的嗎? 95 00:09:33,336 --> 00:09:36,234 不知道皇上有沒有興趣 代理我這個新產品? 96 00:09:36,269 --> 00:09:39,099 請皇上恕罪,微臣沒有好好管教部下 97 00:09:39,135 --> 00:09:40,191 實在是我失職 98 00:09:40,235 --> 00:09:42,167 靈靈發,你不要胡鬧! 99 00:09:42,201 --> 00:09:44,599 對了,我想到一個方法 可以破你的鐵布衫 100 00:09:44,635 --> 00:09:45,464 佛印 101 00:09:45,735 --> 00:09:46,723 來了 102 00:09:51,668 --> 00:09:54,565 我發現將木炭、硝石、硫磺 103 00:09:54,601 --> 00:09:56,760 擺在一個小小的空間裏 104 00:09:56,801 --> 00:09:58,358 比如,人的口中 105 00:09:59,101 --> 00:10:01,067 再加進一顆小小的鋼珠 106 00:10:03,134 --> 00:10:05,100 當裏面引爆的時候 107 00:10:05,133 --> 00:10:08,065 固體變成氣體 氣體澎漲產生強大力量 108 00:10:08,100 --> 00:10:08,997 將這顆鋼珠迫出來 109 00:10:09,033 --> 00:10:11,056 威力足以斷石分金 110 00:10:11,100 --> 00:10:13,123 鐵布衫馬上變成一件破衣服 111 00:10:13,167 --> 00:10:14,394 你說什麼? 112 00:10:14,434 --> 00:10:15,660 好,來! 113 00:10:17,633 --> 00:10:19,395 佛印,準備好沒有? 114 00:10:25,033 --> 00:10:26,623 這種武器唯一的缺點 115 00:10:26,666 --> 00:10:29,154 就是爆炸的時候嘴巴會產生高溫 116 00:10:30,033 --> 00:10:32,498 所以佛印的嘴一定要經過特別訓練 117 00:10:33,166 --> 00:10:36,462 剛開始在嘴巴最嫩的時候 先吃點很熱的灌湯餃和小籠包 118 00:10:36,666 --> 00:10:39,257 要不然就是喝熱湯的時候一飲而盡 119 00:10:40,566 --> 00:10:43,430 佛印的嘴已經能夠承受一百度的高溫 120 00:10:44,333 --> 00:10:47,355 我告訴你 就算吃魚翅也能夠吃得比別人快 121 00:10:47,398 --> 00:10:48,523 能多吃兩碗 122 00:10:48,565 --> 00:10:49,792 只不過! 123 00:10:50,132 --> 00:10:52,495 奉勸各位小朋友,千萬別學呀! 124 00:11:00,398 --> 00:11:01,727 成功了沒有呀? 125 00:11:05,098 --> 00:11:05,995 還差一點點 126 00:11:06,031 --> 00:11:08,259 我好像覺得我的嘴巴不見了 127 00:11:08,298 --> 00:11:09,388 只是變大了 128 00:11:09,431 --> 00:11:10,988 到底有多大呀? 129 00:11:11,031 --> 00:11:13,156 很大的,你放心吧! 130 00:11:13,664 --> 00:11:16,028 差不多成功,就差一點點 131 00:11:16,065 --> 00:11:19,053 如果多給我一點時間改良的話 我應該就可以… 132 00:11:19,097 --> 00:11:20,154 住口! 133 00:11:21,164 --> 00:11:22,187 請皇上息怒 134 00:11:22,231 --> 00:11:23,753 阿發,你到底在搞什麼? 135 00:11:23,797 --> 00:11:24,922 搞些小小新意 136 00:11:24,964 --> 00:11:26,294 我問你搞什麼? 137 00:11:26,464 --> 00:11:28,656 就是東搞一下西搞一下嘛 138 00:11:29,130 --> 00:11:30,493 說呀!你搞什麼呀? 139 00:11:31,064 --> 00:11:32,996 你到底搞什麼東西呀? 皇上問你 140 00:11:33,530 --> 00:11:34,723 你搞什麼? 快點說! 141 00:11:35,130 --> 00:11:38,028 當然我也是想搞點新的東西出來 142 00:11:38,064 --> 00:11:40,359 你給我上來說!站這兒! 143 00:11:41,029 --> 00:11:41,791 快點,走快點… 144 00:11:41,996 --> 00:11:42,792 我來了! 145 00:11:43,029 --> 00:11:44,961 如果不是保龍一族代代相傳 146 00:11:44,996 --> 00:11:46,394 我早就把你趕出去了 147 00:11:46,430 --> 00:11:48,191 你現在給我滾下去 148 00:11:49,396 --> 00:11:52,089 我給你一個大夫的職位 讓你用來掩飾身份 149 00:11:52,129 --> 00:11:53,492 他選的是婦科大夫 150 00:11:53,529 --> 00:11:54,995 你看看你多沒出息呀! 151 00:11:55,129 --> 00:11:57,061 平常也不見你勤練功夫 152 00:11:57,096 --> 00:11:58,721 每天不知道在搞什麼鬼 153 00:11:58,762 --> 00:12:00,751 他昨天晚上還沒來開會哩 154 00:12:00,796 --> 00:12:02,023 你昨晚跑到哪兒去了? 155 00:12:02,063 --> 00:12:03,688 我上屋頂捉賊了皇上 156 00:12:03,729 --> 00:12:04,626 捉什麼賊呀? 157 00:12:04,662 --> 00:12:07,991 我捉到葉孤城,西門吹雪,跟陸小鳳 158 00:12:08,028 --> 00:12:09,324 雖然後來讓他們跑了 159 00:12:09,362 --> 00:12:11,055 可是我拿到一本秘笈呀 160 00:12:11,095 --> 00:12:11,992 那你拿到什麼秘笈呀? 161 00:12:12,295 --> 00:12:14,090 就是天外飛僊呀皇上 162 00:12:14,128 --> 00:12:15,684 那你練了沒有呢? 163 00:12:15,728 --> 00:12:17,024 練了一點呀! 164 00:12:17,062 --> 00:12:18,221 你馬上練給我看看 165 00:12:20,062 --> 00:12:22,687 這招就是天外飛僊 166 00:12:25,328 --> 00:12:27,317 他在耍你呀皇上 167 00:12:27,528 --> 00:12:31,255 馬上給我上來,快點,站這兒… 168 00:12:31,628 --> 00:12:33,820 來了… 快點… 169 00:12:33,861 --> 00:12:35,191 別裝蒜,快上來… 170 00:12:35,228 --> 00:12:35,750 來了… 171 00:12:35,794 --> 00:12:39,556 給我上來… 到了… 172 00:12:39,594 --> 00:12:40,151 現在立刻消失 173 00:12:40,194 --> 00:12:41,217 我告訴你 174 00:12:41,261 --> 00:12:43,726 我以後不要再看到你! 175 00:12:43,760 --> 00:12:45,783 連聲也不要聽到! 176 00:12:48,994 --> 00:12:55,222 保龍一族… 177 00:12:56,793 --> 00:12:57,623 好! 178 00:13:00,659 --> 00:13:01,590 好呀! 179 00:13:21,593 --> 00:13:22,785 大夫,我… 180 00:13:22,992 --> 00:13:24,288 我開點藥給你好嗎? 181 00:13:24,326 --> 00:13:28,951 你不要那麼急嘛 先聽我說完到底那裏不舒服呀 182 00:13:28,992 --> 00:13:32,015 有什麼不舒服都要開藥 沒別的辦法可行了 183 00:13:32,092 --> 00:13:33,058 拿藥 184 00:13:34,258 --> 00:13:35,281 給錢 185 00:13:36,158 --> 00:13:36,954 送客 186 00:13:36,992 --> 00:13:38,719 大夫,我大老遠到這裏來 187 00:13:38,758 --> 00:13:41,519 你先讓我說完那裏不舒服呀 188 00:13:41,558 --> 00:13:44,046 拜託你嘛,讓我說嘛 189 00:13:44,091 --> 00:13:46,580 我讓你一路回你家,一路說 190 00:13:46,625 --> 00:13:49,090 到你家還沒說完的話再從頭說一次 191 00:13:49,124 --> 00:13:49,987 下一位 192 00:13:51,091 --> 00:13:53,057 大夫,我不舒服呀 193 00:13:53,091 --> 00:13:54,386 我開點藥給你好嗎? 194 00:13:54,424 --> 00:13:56,583 我手腳冰冷,頭暈發熱 195 00:13:56,624 --> 00:14:00,181 氣虛血弱 有時候蹲下來再站起來還會頭暈呀 196 00:14:00,224 --> 00:14:02,349 那沒辦法了,連藥都省了 197 00:14:02,390 --> 00:14:03,980 回去準備辦後事吧 198 00:14:04,023 --> 00:14:06,989 有這麼嚴重?會不會是… 199 00:14:07,023 --> 00:14:09,682 女人一個月一次失血過多貧血怕冷 200 00:14:09,723 --> 00:14:11,985 生病或者是產後失調呀? 201 00:14:12,090 --> 00:14:13,283 有什麼根據呢? 202 00:14:13,324 --> 00:14:18,346 所謂脈象緩靜,血不養汗 舌頭發白,血不養肝嘛! 203 00:14:18,389 --> 00:14:20,514 那應該怎麼醫治呢? 204 00:14:21,256 --> 00:14:22,517 很簡單 205 00:14:22,556 --> 00:14:24,988 應該用天南星五錢,百合一錢半 206 00:14:25,022 --> 00:14:27,488 土丑星麻兩錢 史君子八分,夏枯草一兩 207 00:14:27,523 --> 00:14:31,649 以款冬花做藥引 再用文武火反覆互煎! 208 00:14:34,389 --> 00:14:37,616 藥已經抓好了,用八碗水煎成一碗 209 00:14:37,655 --> 00:14:38,985 藥到病除! 210 00:14:39,388 --> 00:14:40,547 多謝大夫 211 00:14:40,989 --> 00:14:41,784 送大夫 212 00:14:41,989 --> 00:14:43,080 下一… 213 00:14:46,388 --> 00:14:47,285 位? 214 00:14:49,088 --> 00:14:51,111 大夫,我的心好不舒服呀! 215 00:14:51,155 --> 00:14:53,018 開點藥給你吃好嗎? 216 00:14:53,288 --> 00:14:57,220 我家那個死鬼在外面養小老婆呀 217 00:14:58,988 --> 00:15:01,420 說他兩句就動手打人 218 00:15:02,055 --> 00:15:06,419 我受夠了 雖然粗暴的男人會讓我覺得刺激 219 00:15:06,688 --> 00:15:08,984 但是我真的受不了,我受不了啦 220 00:15:10,021 --> 00:15:12,384 大夫,你粗不粗暴? 221 00:15:14,987 --> 00:15:16,647 看情況呀… 222 00:15:17,588 --> 00:15:19,315 我也可以粗暴呀… 223 00:15:19,687 --> 00:15:23,983 好!我老公在外面玩,我也玩給他看 224 00:15:24,020 --> 00:15:25,077 來呀 225 00:15:27,054 --> 00:15:28,179 我看你有多粗! 226 00:15:31,120 --> 00:15:32,086 老婆! 227 00:15:32,420 --> 00:15:33,784 什麼事呀老公? 228 00:15:40,153 --> 00:15:41,483 這位姑娘… 229 00:15:41,752 --> 00:15:43,082 要我幫忙 230 00:15:43,119 --> 00:15:45,085 醫者父母心嘛 231 00:15:45,119 --> 00:15:48,573 人家大老遠趕來 你能夠幫忙就幫一下 232 00:15:49,320 --> 00:15:52,150 這位姑娘的手腳撐得這麼久 會不會累呀? 233 00:15:52,186 --> 00:15:53,481 我煮碗麵給你吃? 234 00:15:53,519 --> 00:15:55,110 我沒事了 235 00:15:58,752 --> 00:16:00,775 老婆,我乖不乖呀? 236 00:16:01,052 --> 00:16:02,609 我來了,你當然乖啦 237 00:16:02,652 --> 00:16:04,742 如果我沒有來,你會不會受誘惑呀? 238 00:16:04,785 --> 00:16:06,411 我可以對天發誓 239 00:16:06,452 --> 00:16:07,281 會! 240 00:16:09,018 --> 00:16:10,109 你這個死鬼! 241 00:16:13,085 --> 00:16:16,710 你再說一次 你是不是真的會受誘惑,講! 242 00:16:16,751 --> 00:16:17,648 會 243 00:16:18,218 --> 00:16:19,014 好! 244 00:16:31,184 --> 00:16:32,979 我不怕癢,傻瓜! 245 00:16:37,051 --> 00:16:38,516 咬就不玩了 246 00:16:38,550 --> 00:16:39,538 好呀! 247 00:16:51,283 --> 00:16:53,181 投降呀老婆!投降呀老婆! 248 00:16:53,217 --> 00:16:54,114 放手呀! 249 00:16:54,150 --> 00:16:56,082 我不放!我一放你就會撲過來 250 00:16:56,417 --> 00:16:58,406 我不會…我真的投降了 251 00:16:58,449 --> 00:16:59,972 我的手都快斷了,老婆快放手呀 252 00:17:00,016 --> 00:17:01,743 我不信! 253 00:17:07,249 --> 00:17:08,340 真的斷了! 254 00:17:10,783 --> 00:17:12,305 對不起呀老公 255 00:17:18,082 --> 00:17:19,173 你這個女人 256 00:17:19,482 --> 00:17:23,039 一手空手擒拿的武功練得這麼好 257 00:17:23,249 --> 00:17:26,942 師傅不單不會不高興 而且我的內心裏 258 00:17:26,982 --> 00:17:29,504 覺得很安慰,師傅… 259 00:17:31,015 --> 00:17:31,412 什麼? 260 00:17:31,448 --> 00:17:34,539 現在內心裏面正在 想些什麼你猜到了沒有? 261 00:17:34,582 --> 00:17:36,707 我還有獎品要給你哩 262 00:17:38,781 --> 00:17:40,644 你記不記得前兩天在廚房切蔥的時候 263 00:17:40,681 --> 00:17:41,738 切切切切 264 00:17:42,415 --> 00:17:44,040 切到了手指頭呀? 265 00:17:45,081 --> 00:17:47,070 現在我把這隻手送給你 266 00:17:47,114 --> 00:17:50,238 以後你就用自己的手抓住這隻手 267 00:17:50,280 --> 00:17:52,246 用這隻手按著那些蔥 268 00:17:52,280 --> 00:17:53,974 然後就算是切到也是切到這隻手 269 00:17:54,014 --> 00:17:55,979 不是切到自己的手 270 00:17:56,547 --> 00:17:58,536 你怎麼想到的? 271 00:17:59,980 --> 00:18:01,139 謝謝你呀老公! 272 00:18:01,180 --> 00:18:01,907 老婆! 273 00:18:01,947 --> 00:18:02,606 老公! 274 00:18:02,647 --> 00:18:03,442 老婆! 275 00:18:03,480 --> 00:18:04,343 老公! 276 00:18:04,980 --> 00:18:07,571 還有你說,掃地是最辛苦的? 277 00:18:07,613 --> 00:18:08,510 對呀 278 00:18:09,113 --> 00:18:11,136 我再送你這雙鞋 279 00:18:11,180 --> 00:18:13,146 你穿上之後呢,右腳就是掃帚 280 00:18:13,180 --> 00:18:14,202 左腳就是掃箕 281 00:18:14,246 --> 00:18:17,008 然後你可以一路走一路掃地 282 00:18:17,446 --> 00:18:18,707 張開嘴巴 283 00:18:19,313 --> 00:18:21,609 把垃圾都掃進你嘴裏 284 00:18:23,413 --> 00:18:25,174 不要! 285 00:18:26,745 --> 00:18:28,041 等等… 286 00:18:29,046 --> 00:18:30,205 你覺得怎麼樣? 287 00:18:31,712 --> 00:18:35,644 老公,我覺得你是 一個很偉大的發明家! 288 00:18:35,979 --> 00:18:37,239 還有呢? 289 00:18:37,979 --> 00:18:39,002 還有… 290 00:18:39,046 --> 00:18:41,068 我好愛你呀 291 00:18:41,212 --> 00:18:42,075 我都是… 292 00:18:42,111 --> 00:18:42,577 睡吧 293 00:18:42,612 --> 00:18:44,373 但是我想試一下 294 00:18:45,011 --> 00:18:46,568 要試就試這一個 295 00:18:53,412 --> 00:18:54,536 是老鼠呀 296 00:18:54,711 --> 00:18:57,643 這次我利用老鼠出力來產生力量 297 00:18:57,678 --> 00:19:00,439 再利用齒輪將這種力量大量增加 298 00:19:00,477 --> 00:19:02,204 繼而推動這個升降台 299 00:19:03,144 --> 00:19:06,702 於是呢就可以反覆 舉起一兩百斤重的東西 300 00:19:07,177 --> 00:19:10,632 老公,上次我們用 那個蒸氣發動不好嗎? 301 00:19:11,077 --> 00:19:14,373 蒸氣發動每次一到 緊要關頭水就燒幹不會動了! 302 00:19:14,411 --> 00:19:15,967 你說它好不好呀? 303 00:19:16,211 --> 00:19:17,199 說得也對呀 304 00:19:17,244 --> 00:19:18,709 就是差了一點嘛對不對? 305 00:19:18,743 --> 00:19:21,039 而且這一次我最大的突破 306 00:19:21,077 --> 00:19:24,009 是可以依不同的需要 選擇不同的速度 307 00:19:24,044 --> 00:19:25,032 你看! 308 00:19:36,176 --> 00:19:38,540 老婆,你說我厲不厲害呀? 309 00:19:39,109 --> 00:19:40,574 你好賤呀! 310 00:19:40,776 --> 00:19:41,969 那還用說? 311 00:19:43,176 --> 00:19:45,471 老公,那個『後』是什麼意思呀? 312 00:19:45,509 --> 00:19:46,975 後就是向後嘛 313 00:19:47,043 --> 00:19:48,031 讓我試試看! 314 00:19:48,076 --> 00:19:49,007 不要! 315 00:20:04,975 --> 00:20:05,702 行不行得通呀? 316 00:20:05,741 --> 00:20:09,503 行得通! 我用你這個搖控鴛鴦鏟來炒菜 317 00:20:09,541 --> 00:20:11,700 真的一滴油也不會噴到我身上呀! 318 00:20:11,741 --> 00:20:15,400 鴛鴦鏟當然好用啦! 我說的是那個抽油煙機呀 319 00:20:15,441 --> 00:20:16,464 抽油煙機? 320 00:20:16,708 --> 00:20:18,537 那你多轉幾次讓我看看 321 00:20:26,107 --> 00:20:30,233 真的可以! 你這台抽油煙機真的可以抽油煙呀 322 00:20:30,640 --> 00:20:32,106 還可以鍛煉身體哩! 323 00:20:32,141 --> 00:20:34,470 對呀,還可以鍛煉身體呀! 324 00:20:34,507 --> 00:20:35,268 老公 325 00:20:35,307 --> 00:20:36,069 老婆 326 00:20:36,107 --> 00:20:36,663 老公 327 00:20:36,707 --> 00:20:37,229 老婆 328 00:20:37,273 --> 00:20:38,001 老公 329 00:20:38,041 --> 00:20:38,631 我借給你玩一下 330 00:20:38,674 --> 00:20:39,731 好呀! 331 00:20:57,006 --> 00:20:59,267 好像鬼一樣的那個又來了! 332 00:21:02,172 --> 00:21:03,729 那裏不舒服呀? 333 00:21:04,072 --> 00:21:06,265 大夫… 334 00:21:07,039 --> 00:21:08,096 這裏只有我們兩個 335 00:21:08,139 --> 00:21:10,128 你扮女人已經夠了 336 00:21:10,172 --> 00:21:13,002 你還學女人說話你想殺死我呀? 337 00:21:13,072 --> 00:21:16,232 身為保龍一族的情報人員 338 00:21:16,272 --> 00:21:20,704 我應該神不知鬼不覺的隱藏身份 339 00:21:21,405 --> 00:21:22,530 小心點好 340 00:21:24,538 --> 00:21:27,163 大夫… 341 00:21:27,738 --> 00:21:30,203 我是不是有了? 342 00:21:31,338 --> 00:21:33,929 是呀,吃了這包藥把他打掉 343 00:21:33,971 --> 00:21:35,437 你還有什麼不舒服的快點說呀 344 00:21:35,671 --> 00:21:37,035 佛印說… 345 00:21:37,071 --> 00:21:39,003 不要再學女人說話了 346 00:21:39,038 --> 00:21:40,265 佛印說… 347 00:21:40,305 --> 00:21:43,032 躺低一點,不要讓我看到你的樣子 348 00:21:43,238 --> 00:21:48,465 佛印說 有重要任務叫你馬上返回秘密基地 349 00:21:48,504 --> 00:21:49,992 早點說嘛 350 00:21:54,070 --> 00:21:55,297 阿發,機靈點呀 351 00:21:55,671 --> 00:21:59,467 這次這個艱巨的任務 能不能完成就靠你了 352 00:22:00,970 --> 00:22:03,198 秘密基地這幾天晚上都在辦大食會 353 00:22:03,536 --> 00:22:05,593 要是今天不把這些碗洗好 354 00:22:06,204 --> 00:22:08,102 一定抓你去坐牢的 355 00:22:08,203 --> 00:22:11,169 皇上駕到 356 00:22:13,069 --> 00:22:15,501 微臣聽到消息說,在金國境內 357 00:22:15,536 --> 00:22:18,297 上月有巨星落在天府之西 358 00:22:18,336 --> 00:22:18,960 是嗎? 359 00:22:19,002 --> 00:22:21,195 金人稱之為『天外飛僊』 360 00:22:21,236 --> 00:22:23,532 並且召集了各地的名醫 361 00:22:23,569 --> 00:22:25,660 來主持解剖天外飛僊 362 00:22:26,002 --> 00:22:28,331 解剖天外飛僊? 363 00:22:28,402 --> 00:22:30,368 在皇上的英明領道之下 364 00:22:30,402 --> 00:22:32,664 怎麼會發生這麼無知荒誕之事? 365 00:22:32,702 --> 00:22:35,930 我看一定是江湖術士裝神弄鬼的把戲 366 00:22:35,969 --> 00:22:37,628 這樣你也去看呀? 367 00:22:37,669 --> 00:22:40,134 這種人渣,就是被騙也是活該呀 368 00:22:40,368 --> 00:22:41,664 朕想去看看 369 00:22:41,735 --> 00:22:45,962 明知有這種結果 皇上依然勇敢的去面對這些事 370 00:22:46,001 --> 00:22:49,058 這真是勇氣可加,多麼的勇敢! 371 00:22:49,101 --> 00:22:52,692 只有在這麼有勇氣和 求知慾又強的皇上領道之下 372 00:22:52,734 --> 00:22:56,030 國家才可以自強不息,繁榮安定 373 00:22:56,068 --> 00:22:57,465 皇上萬歲! 374 00:22:58,134 --> 00:23:01,032 金國人奸詐狡猾,一定有陰謀 375 00:23:01,067 --> 00:23:03,158 皇上去的話,必定會有危險 376 00:23:03,301 --> 00:23:04,665 別管這麼多了 377 00:23:04,701 --> 00:23:06,257 這些碗洗不完你更危險 378 00:23:06,301 --> 00:23:08,233 但是我有責任一定要提醒皇上呀 379 00:23:08,267 --> 00:23:09,528 皇上萬歲… 380 00:23:09,567 --> 00:23:10,555 好! 381 00:23:10,600 --> 00:23:12,930 恭喜財,準備護駕上路 382 00:23:12,967 --> 00:23:13,933 明天起程 383 00:23:13,967 --> 00:23:14,523 是 384 00:23:14,567 --> 00:23:19,431 皇上萬歲… 385 00:23:20,067 --> 00:23:22,123 阿發,不要再說了 386 00:23:22,166 --> 00:23:24,496 皇上不想聽到你的聲音呀 387 00:23:24,533 --> 00:23:26,021 再說小心被砍頭呀! 388 00:23:26,066 --> 00:23:28,692 洗碗吧!不要… 389 00:23:34,500 --> 00:23:38,522 阿彌陀佛,又救了你一命 390 00:23:38,566 --> 00:23:40,429 我的碗你幫我洗了 391 00:23:47,299 --> 00:23:49,197 當然有陰謀呀! 392 00:23:50,432 --> 00:23:52,295 中原繁榮安定 393 00:23:52,599 --> 00:23:54,689 美女特別美 394 00:23:55,032 --> 00:23:57,554 俊男又特別俊呀 395 00:23:59,232 --> 00:24:01,527 我真希望見到我們金山教的旗幟 396 00:24:01,565 --> 00:24:03,156 飄揚在中原土地上 397 00:24:03,199 --> 00:24:05,596 漢人體弱士兵多病 398 00:24:05,631 --> 00:24:09,654 這次借解剖天外飛僊為名 召集中土名醫 399 00:24:09,698 --> 00:24:11,596 接著去把他們殺個片甲不留 400 00:24:11,631 --> 00:24:13,688 這樣敵軍缺乏醫治 401 00:24:13,731 --> 00:24:15,526 我軍就可以長驅南下 402 00:24:15,565 --> 00:24:19,621 到時候席捲中原 可以說是易如反掌呀 403 00:24:28,964 --> 00:24:31,930 你這個小子 平常看起來已經夠生氣了 404 00:24:31,964 --> 00:24:33,156 笑起來樣子更生氣 405 00:24:33,197 --> 00:24:34,992 我真不曉得為什麼你這麼生氣! 406 00:24:36,297 --> 00:24:37,422 你還說 407 00:24:37,963 --> 00:24:40,020 我見到你的樣子就已經夠生氣了! 408 00:24:40,063 --> 00:24:42,256 見到爹的樣子,就更生氣了! 409 00:24:45,663 --> 00:24:48,061 你不喜歡看到爹現在的樣子嗎? 410 00:24:48,096 --> 00:24:51,153 你爹是因為練了無相神功走火入魔 411 00:24:51,197 --> 00:24:53,129 以致面目全非呀 412 00:25:08,462 --> 00:25:10,950 甲二 413 00:25:10,995 --> 00:25:13,188 壬四 414 00:25:13,328 --> 00:25:14,056 中了沒有? 415 00:25:14,095 --> 00:25:15,287 中了 416 00:25:17,128 --> 00:25:22,060 丁四七 417 00:25:22,094 --> 00:25:26,220 辛二五 418 00:25:26,628 --> 00:25:27,321 中了沒有? 419 00:25:27,361 --> 00:25:29,327 二六 420 00:25:29,361 --> 00:25:30,486 再試試二五 421 00:25:30,528 --> 00:25:31,459 二五 422 00:25:31,495 --> 00:25:32,460 還是二六 423 00:25:32,494 --> 00:25:33,551 二六 424 00:25:33,594 --> 00:25:34,151 中了沒有? 425 00:25:34,195 --> 00:25:35,252 中了 426 00:25:36,360 --> 00:25:37,951 還有哪兒癢呀? 427 00:25:38,294 --> 00:25:40,954 丙一三四六八,加上丁一 428 00:25:41,194 --> 00:25:43,490 再補一條甲二戊四雙寶 429 00:25:44,160 --> 00:25:45,353 中了沒有? 430 00:25:46,960 --> 00:25:48,426 你怎麼那麼笨呀?這那會中呀? 431 00:25:48,460 --> 00:25:50,653 我不笨怎麼表示你聰明呀? 432 00:25:50,693 --> 00:25:52,682 拜託你不要再說我聰明了 433 00:25:53,093 --> 00:25:54,649 可是你的發明真的很棒呀 434 00:25:54,693 --> 00:25:56,091 誰說的? 435 00:25:56,127 --> 00:25:57,058 我說的 436 00:25:57,093 --> 00:25:57,956 貴姓呀? 437 00:25:57,993 --> 00:25:58,959 姓劉呀 438 00:25:58,993 --> 00:26:00,050 那一位呀,閣下 439 00:26:00,093 --> 00:26:01,024 你老婆! 440 00:26:01,060 --> 00:26:02,026 哮 哮 441 00:26:02,493 --> 00:26:03,516 你不要哮我! 442 00:26:03,560 --> 00:26:05,355 是你哮我我才會哮你的 443 00:26:06,226 --> 00:26:09,919 現在全世界只有你稱讚我 有什麼用呀? 444 00:26:09,959 --> 00:26:11,152 我才不管它有沒有用 445 00:26:11,193 --> 00:26:12,352 我就是覺得你很棒 446 00:26:12,393 --> 00:26:13,620 你棒我當然稱讚你了! 447 00:26:13,660 --> 00:26:14,591 你不懂我說的話? 448 00:26:14,626 --> 00:26:16,057 那你想說什麼呀? 449 00:26:16,092 --> 00:26:17,058 你不知道呀? 450 00:26:17,092 --> 00:26:18,580 我在外面做事已經很辛苦 451 00:26:18,625 --> 00:26:20,614 我有多辛苦你知道個屁呀! 452 00:26:21,659 --> 00:26:24,023 對呀!你每天出去做事我真的不知道 453 00:26:24,059 --> 00:26:26,286 我只相信你做的是好事 454 00:26:26,325 --> 00:26:28,120 誰得罪你了,你去把他罵回來 455 00:26:28,158 --> 00:26:29,647 你不要拿我當出氣筒 456 00:26:29,692 --> 00:26:31,055 因為我跟你熟呀 457 00:26:31,091 --> 00:26:31,920 那我就活該倒霉呀? 458 00:26:31,958 --> 00:26:33,322 不怕他媽的告訴你 459 00:26:33,358 --> 00:26:34,051 沒錯! 460 00:26:34,091 --> 00:26:34,920 所以你就… 461 00:26:34,958 --> 00:26:36,584 就拿你當我的出氣筒 462 00:26:36,625 --> 00:26:37,681 Yeah! 463 00:26:38,492 --> 00:26:40,014 不服氣呀?走呀! 464 00:26:56,324 --> 00:26:59,290 你怎麼會知道我躲在卓下面? 465 00:26:59,324 --> 00:27:01,085 你每次都躲在卓下面呀 466 00:27:01,124 --> 00:27:03,954 我有什麼辦法能夠 不知道你躲在卓下面呢? 467 00:27:04,623 --> 00:27:05,646 拜託你用點腦子想一想 468 00:27:05,690 --> 00:27:07,281 再找幾個新的地方來躲 469 00:27:07,324 --> 00:27:09,051 好讓我有一點新鮮感好吧? 470 00:27:09,090 --> 00:27:12,249 可是我不躲在卓下面 我怕你找不到我嘛! 471 00:27:15,690 --> 00:27:16,678 我真受不了你! 472 00:27:16,723 --> 00:27:18,382 你不要這個樣子,我拜託你好不好? 473 00:27:18,423 --> 00:27:20,412 老婆,你不要這個樣子,謝謝… 474 00:27:20,456 --> 00:27:23,183 我只是一個血肉之軀 你每次都這樣罵我 475 00:27:23,223 --> 00:27:24,621 我不知道那天我忍不下去了 476 00:27:24,657 --> 00:27:26,088 忍不下去你就走呀 477 00:27:26,256 --> 00:27:27,085 我去洗澡了 478 00:27:27,123 --> 00:27:28,952 我叫你走呀 479 00:27:29,256 --> 00:27:30,381 你會不會肚子餓呀? 480 00:27:30,422 --> 00:27:32,013 我煮碗麵給你吃 481 00:27:53,122 --> 00:27:55,213 對不起呀,是我不對 482 00:27:56,955 --> 00:27:58,114 我發神經 483 00:28:00,388 --> 00:28:01,319 算了 484 00:28:02,087 --> 00:28:04,519 究竟是什麼事讓你生那麼大的氣呀? 485 00:28:06,321 --> 00:28:09,014 在金國有個很重要的醫學會議 486 00:28:09,054 --> 00:28:11,020 我想去但沒有資格參加 487 00:28:11,188 --> 00:28:12,552 誰說你沒有? 488 00:28:12,588 --> 00:28:13,554 我說你有 489 00:28:16,021 --> 00:28:18,078 全世界說我沒有都無所謂 490 00:28:18,654 --> 00:28:19,677 你說我有就… 491 00:28:19,720 --> 00:28:20,651 行了! 492 00:28:43,486 --> 00:28:44,509 停! 493 00:28:50,319 --> 00:28:50,910 什麼事呀? 494 00:28:50,953 --> 00:28:53,145 荒山野嶺,居然出現幾個樵夫 495 00:28:53,186 --> 00:28:54,652 小心有詐 496 00:28:55,352 --> 00:28:56,375 你們是什麼人? 497 00:28:56,952 --> 00:28:59,077 我們是砍柴的 498 00:28:59,652 --> 00:29:01,948 不要擋我的路呀 499 00:29:02,152 --> 00:29:03,981 我是皇上 500 00:29:04,085 --> 00:29:05,983 全部閃開 501 00:29:08,652 --> 00:29:11,379 你們在路上千萬不要張揚 502 00:29:11,418 --> 00:29:14,179 這次我是微服出巡 不想讓人家知道我是皇上 503 00:29:14,451 --> 00:29:15,576 知道嗎? 504 00:29:16,984 --> 00:29:17,609 知道 505 00:29:17,884 --> 00:29:18,578 起轎 506 00:29:18,618 --> 00:29:20,516 起轎 507 00:29:36,818 --> 00:29:40,511 帶頭那個人呼吸細密,眼神銳利 508 00:29:40,551 --> 00:29:42,540 一定是長練氣功的高手 509 00:29:43,017 --> 00:29:45,609 帶鞭子的那一個步法穩健 510 00:29:45,650 --> 00:29:48,446 他的下盤功夫一定非常了得 511 00:29:48,750 --> 00:29:51,773 還有那個雙臂揮動有力 512 00:29:51,817 --> 00:29:54,442 我看是練上三路的高手 513 00:29:54,483 --> 00:29:57,881 這三個相信就是保龍一族的鐵布衫 514 00:29:57,917 --> 00:29:59,940 碎石腳跟五形拳 515 00:30:00,449 --> 00:30:02,881 保龍一族三大高手全都到齊了 516 00:30:02,916 --> 00:30:05,712 轎裏面那一個一定是當今皇帝 517 00:30:05,916 --> 00:30:08,178 本來想抓那些白癡大夫 518 00:30:08,216 --> 00:30:09,977 誰知道來了一個皇帝 519 00:30:10,016 --> 00:30:14,381 這一次真是踏破鐵鞋無覓處 得來全不費功夫! 520 00:30:27,248 --> 00:30:28,838 又怎麼了? 521 00:30:47,881 --> 00:30:48,812 護駕 522 00:33:34,808 --> 00:33:35,705 正點 523 00:33:35,741 --> 00:33:36,399 好噁心呀 524 00:33:36,440 --> 00:33:37,531 可以進場了 525 00:33:38,541 --> 00:33:41,098 老婆,那個解剖大會好像要開始了 526 00:33:41,240 --> 00:33:42,705 我們去看看 527 00:33:43,107 --> 00:33:45,436 這個解剖大會真的要見識一下 528 00:33:45,473 --> 00:33:47,439 『射』一聲挖開肚子 529 00:33:47,473 --> 00:33:49,133 『劃』的拉開層皮 530 00:33:49,174 --> 00:33:50,969 『光』的一聲腸子拉出來了 531 00:33:51,007 --> 00:33:53,370 接住『砰』的一聲,大便都出來了 532 00:33:53,406 --> 00:33:55,031 真是精彩過癮呀 533 00:33:55,339 --> 00:33:57,532 老公,我剛剛看到 市集好多新衣服在賣 534 00:33:57,573 --> 00:33:58,596 我去買衣服 535 00:33:58,640 --> 00:33:59,537 那等一下怎辦呀? 536 00:33:59,573 --> 00:34:01,834 等一下散會了你就到 賣衣服那一邊去找我 537 00:34:01,872 --> 00:34:02,838 就這樣子! 538 00:34:03,772 --> 00:34:05,136 不要到處亂跑啊 539 00:34:08,405 --> 00:34:09,167 請柬呢? 540 00:34:09,206 --> 00:34:10,137 請柬? 541 00:34:10,173 --> 00:34:11,433 就這種請柬呀 542 00:34:12,206 --> 00:34:14,933 通融一下啦,我也是大夫呀 543 00:34:14,972 --> 00:34:16,063 你是大夫? 544 00:34:16,105 --> 00:34:18,469 是呀,我很出名的 545 00:34:18,672 --> 00:34:20,001 那好吧,進去吧 546 00:34:20,205 --> 00:34:21,694 謝謝你呀兄弟 547 00:34:23,071 --> 00:34:24,002 死到臨頭還不知道 548 00:34:24,038 --> 00:34:24,901 什麼? 549 00:34:35,638 --> 00:34:41,798 大夫… 大夫… 550 00:34:44,604 --> 00:34:47,229 大夫… 551 00:34:50,304 --> 00:34:53,202 我最近發現了把川貝、桔梗、蜂蜜 552 00:34:53,237 --> 00:34:54,497 提煉成一種枇杷膏 553 00:34:54,537 --> 00:34:57,129 功能主治煙酒過多,睡眠不足 554 00:34:57,171 --> 00:34:59,534 喉嚨痛,聲音啞,一瓶就搞定了 555 00:34:59,570 --> 00:35:00,593 那你發財了 556 00:35:00,937 --> 00:35:02,732 我最近發現一種植物 557 00:35:02,770 --> 00:35:05,930 吃了之後呢會大笑大鬧,生不如死 558 00:35:05,969 --> 00:35:08,094 當地的土人稱之為大麻 559 00:35:08,170 --> 00:35:08,999 你更發呀 560 00:35:09,036 --> 00:35:10,730 這個一聽就知道是害人之物 561 00:35:10,769 --> 00:35:11,996 勸你還是自己知道就好了 562 00:35:12,036 --> 00:35:13,763 還有,看這個樣子不要吃太多了 563 00:35:13,803 --> 00:35:14,360 說的也是 564 00:35:14,403 --> 00:35:15,198 身上有沒有? 565 00:35:15,236 --> 00:35:15,497 來一點 566 00:35:15,536 --> 00:35:16,627 晚一點… 567 00:35:17,069 --> 00:35:19,194 這一位大夫,未曾見過 568 00:35:19,236 --> 00:35:21,997 戴著頂帽子兵分兩路這麼奇特 569 00:35:22,036 --> 00:35:23,228 不知在那兒高就? 570 00:35:23,269 --> 00:35:25,394 在下在京城專醫婦科 571 00:35:25,435 --> 00:35:26,560 是專看女人的? 572 00:35:26,736 --> 00:35:28,031 那你最發財了 573 00:35:30,402 --> 00:35:31,924 各位,各位 574 00:35:33,369 --> 00:35:35,494 各位朋友大家好 575 00:35:35,536 --> 00:35:39,400 歡迎各位收看我們 這個天外飛僊的解剖過程 576 00:35:39,768 --> 00:35:42,326 這個飛僊是極其珍貴的 577 00:35:42,369 --> 00:35:45,233 今晚是首次獨家大揭露 578 00:35:45,268 --> 00:35:47,098 怎麼沒有看見皇上呢? 579 00:35:47,135 --> 00:35:48,395 為了讓大家能夠看得清楚 580 00:35:48,434 --> 00:35:52,833 我們一連五晚不斷的重複 重複再重複 581 00:35:52,868 --> 00:35:54,527 珍貴的解剖過程 582 00:35:54,568 --> 00:35:59,829 務求讓大家能夠重複重複 再重複的看個仔細 583 00:35:59,901 --> 00:36:00,696 不用吧 584 00:36:00,734 --> 00:36:05,224 另外呢,我們找到發現飛僊的 那位農夫上來現身說法 585 00:36:05,334 --> 00:36:07,856 不過,現在讓我們先來訪問一下 586 00:36:07,901 --> 00:36:11,424 這位農夫的母親的隔壁鄰居的小孩的 587 00:36:11,467 --> 00:36:12,558 那一條狗! 588 00:36:36,833 --> 00:36:38,526 天外飛僊的眼睛怎麼那麼大呀? 589 00:36:38,566 --> 00:36:40,088 這樣是不是看得清楚一點呀? 590 00:36:40,132 --> 00:36:42,030 他的翅膀呢?沒有翅膀怎麼飛呀? 591 00:36:42,065 --> 00:36:43,156 長得真奇怪呀! 592 00:36:43,199 --> 00:36:45,165 不會吧,跟我長得差不多嘛 593 00:36:45,199 --> 00:36:47,324 對!跟你一樣醜 594 00:36:47,366 --> 00:36:48,389 你幹嘛? 595 00:36:49,532 --> 00:36:50,896 我在檢查他的性別 596 00:36:51,099 --> 00:36:52,462 應該是個女的 597 00:36:52,598 --> 00:36:53,655 他本來就是女的 598 00:36:53,698 --> 00:36:55,459 我還知道她身懷六甲哩 599 00:36:55,965 --> 00:36:56,828 你幹什麼? 600 00:36:56,865 --> 00:36:59,024 我看看他是男的還是女的 601 00:36:59,065 --> 00:37:01,758 你不懂就不要在這裏瞎攪和了 602 00:37:01,799 --> 00:37:03,389 這裏有沒有婦科大夫呀? 603 00:37:03,431 --> 00:37:04,658 就是他羅 604 00:37:15,731 --> 00:37:18,458 動手呀,快點動手呀 605 00:37:18,497 --> 00:37:20,157 不如開點藥給她吃好嗎? 606 00:37:24,364 --> 00:37:25,352 你會不會解剖呀? 607 00:37:25,397 --> 00:37:26,454 我會呀 608 00:37:26,497 --> 00:37:27,861 快點拿這把刀動手呀 609 00:37:27,897 --> 00:37:29,761 動手就動手,怕你呀? 610 00:37:29,830 --> 00:37:31,853 不過,可不可用這一把呀? 611 00:37:37,663 --> 00:37:39,027 先不要動手呀 612 00:37:40,097 --> 00:37:41,323 你會不會解剖呀? 613 00:37:41,363 --> 00:37:44,057 從喉嚨一刀下去,先放血才對嘛 614 00:37:44,097 --> 00:37:46,063 還用你說?我早知道了 615 00:37:48,062 --> 00:37:49,119 你來吧 616 00:37:49,163 --> 00:37:50,595 其實我不是大夫 617 00:37:50,630 --> 00:37:51,687 我是殺豬的 618 00:37:51,896 --> 00:37:53,862 你這個膽小鬼,不要找藉口 619 00:37:53,896 --> 00:37:54,759 來,讓我來 620 00:38:35,261 --> 00:38:36,693 這麼久,你搞定了沒有? 621 00:38:37,094 --> 00:38:38,617 你問得好,剛剛搞定 622 00:38:45,894 --> 00:38:46,360 等一等 623 00:38:46,860 --> 00:38:48,258 幹嘛? 624 00:38:59,527 --> 00:39:01,152 皇上的聲音? 625 00:39:03,859 --> 00:39:06,121 皇上,我就猜到是你了 626 00:39:06,226 --> 00:39:07,851 是誰砍我? 627 00:39:07,893 --> 00:39:09,052 有人砍你呀? 628 00:39:09,093 --> 00:39:10,718 就是他! 629 00:39:10,759 --> 00:39:12,089 可是那把刀是他的 630 00:39:12,126 --> 00:39:13,455 又是你這個混蛋! 631 00:39:13,492 --> 00:39:15,549 我要回砍你兩刀 632 00:39:17,225 --> 00:39:18,657 怎麼會這樣子? 633 00:39:19,292 --> 00:39:20,588 你們拿刀幹什麼? 634 00:39:20,626 --> 00:39:22,148 冷靜! 635 00:39:22,726 --> 00:39:23,918 果然有陰謀! 636 00:39:23,958 --> 00:39:25,049 陰謀?! 637 00:39:25,292 --> 00:39:26,121 皇上 638 00:39:26,726 --> 00:39:29,283 今日就讓我靈靈發來保護你 639 00:39:37,591 --> 00:39:39,217 連我的刀都吸走,這麼厲害呀? 640 00:39:39,258 --> 00:39:40,281 來,一個人一把保護自己 641 00:39:40,324 --> 00:39:41,347 皇上,你先吧 642 00:39:43,025 --> 00:39:43,752 你們等一等! 643 00:39:55,291 --> 00:39:57,018 不要小看我們大夫 644 00:39:57,057 --> 00:40:00,046 我們也是拿刀混飯吃的 就是了 645 00:40:01,557 --> 00:40:03,648 不要太生氣,先喝點水 646 00:40:03,690 --> 00:40:04,713 裏面全死了 647 00:40:08,056 --> 00:40:09,147 何方妖怪? 648 00:40:10,824 --> 00:40:12,585 領教我老邪刀法 649 00:40:21,056 --> 00:40:23,419 我跟你拼了!給我吧 650 00:40:23,456 --> 00:40:24,513 這把刀是我的! 651 00:40:34,856 --> 00:40:35,912 一人砍一邊 好 652 00:41:32,887 --> 00:41:33,818 這麼厲害呀 653 00:41:36,220 --> 00:41:37,117 住手 654 00:41:40,453 --> 00:41:41,646 你有沒有搞錯呀? 655 00:41:41,686 --> 00:41:43,413 怎麼每一次打到的都是我? 656 00:41:43,653 --> 00:41:44,516 大哥 657 00:41:45,219 --> 00:41:47,980 你那雙大腳在下面全穿梆了 658 00:41:48,019 --> 00:41:49,848 真以為我是笨蛋呀? 659 00:41:53,052 --> 00:41:55,075 快… 660 00:42:19,651 --> 00:42:20,674 我頂! 661 00:42:26,918 --> 00:42:28,941 我知道,同性相拒! 662 00:42:35,484 --> 00:42:36,609 阿發,你怎麼樣? 663 00:42:36,884 --> 00:42:41,044 怎麼樣?這個磁石呀真的是很了不起 664 00:42:49,517 --> 00:42:50,244 慘了! 665 00:42:50,283 --> 00:42:51,442 異性相吸呀 666 00:43:19,649 --> 00:43:20,512 有沒有搞錯呀? 667 00:44:00,202 --> 00:44:02,293 Yeah! 668 00:44:05,935 --> 00:44:07,424 阿發,你小子有一套呀 669 00:44:07,468 --> 00:44:09,626 多謝皇上,我們還是快走吧 670 00:44:09,668 --> 00:44:10,656 好,起駕 671 00:44:10,701 --> 00:44:11,564 走啦! 672 00:44:23,367 --> 00:44:25,162 老婆 673 00:44:28,534 --> 00:44:29,431 你老婆也來了嗎? 674 00:44:29,467 --> 00:44:30,490 介紹我認識一下 675 00:44:30,600 --> 00:44:32,328 先回去!這裏很危險 676 00:44:49,833 --> 00:44:51,731 怎麼還有一個活著? 677 00:44:51,766 --> 00:44:53,062 難道兒子在裏面有意外? 678 00:44:53,533 --> 00:44:54,725 我老婆呢? 679 00:44:54,799 --> 00:44:56,594 滿地都是呀!你自己找吧 680 00:44:56,766 --> 00:44:58,096 不要說那麼多,殺死他 681 00:45:14,332 --> 00:45:15,559 你躲到那裏都得死! 682 00:45:50,964 --> 00:45:51,827 殺死他 683 00:46:13,963 --> 00:46:15,189 怎麼這麼誇張! 684 00:46:31,829 --> 00:46:33,125 有沒有搞錯? 685 00:47:23,793 --> 00:47:24,554 老公 686 00:47:25,459 --> 00:47:26,254 老公 687 00:47:28,459 --> 00:47:29,947 怎麼會一模一樣的衣服? 688 00:47:31,493 --> 00:47:32,083 老婆 689 00:47:34,026 --> 00:47:34,617 老公 690 00:47:41,659 --> 00:47:42,647 你跑到哪裏去了? 691 00:47:43,458 --> 00:47:45,549 老公,我剛才碰到隔壁村的姐姐 692 00:47:45,592 --> 00:47:48,353 她說隔壁村大減價 於是帶我去搶購嘛 693 00:47:49,092 --> 00:47:50,058 你在這幹嘛? 694 00:47:50,292 --> 00:47:51,952 我在…找你呀 695 00:47:52,559 --> 00:47:54,184 這裏好像失火似的 696 00:47:54,225 --> 00:47:55,918 剛剛在這烤東西吃呀 697 00:47:56,659 --> 00:47:57,386 烤東西吃? 698 00:47:57,425 --> 00:47:58,550 烤雞翅膀啊 699 00:47:58,592 --> 00:48:00,558 那些人怎麼全都躺在地上? 700 00:48:00,991 --> 00:48:03,321 吃飽了嘛,躺一下很正常呀 701 00:48:04,225 --> 00:48:05,781 你又是怎麼搞的?吃得狼狽! 702 00:48:05,825 --> 00:48:07,291 衣服還弄到破破爛爛的 703 00:48:07,325 --> 00:48:08,347 到底怎麼回事呀? 704 00:48:08,558 --> 00:48:10,649 剛剛全村的人烤一隻雞翅膀 705 00:48:10,691 --> 00:48:12,680 我搶得太厲害就搞成這樣了 706 00:48:13,090 --> 00:48:15,147 你以為我是傻瓜? 707 00:48:21,357 --> 00:48:22,414 他… 708 00:48:22,658 --> 00:48:23,419 老婆 709 00:48:24,824 --> 00:48:29,314 你… 710 00:48:30,623 --> 00:48:32,089 你這皮衣那兒買的? 711 00:48:33,623 --> 00:48:34,384 這件? 712 00:48:35,290 --> 00:48:37,256 這件你喜歡,你拿去穿吧 713 00:48:37,290 --> 00:48:39,256 我不是喜歡你這件皮衣 714 00:48:39,290 --> 00:48:40,551 也不是想佔你的便宜 715 00:48:40,590 --> 00:48:43,283 如果我想要你這件皮衣的話 我就會叫我老公買給我 716 00:48:43,323 --> 00:48:44,811 我老公很有錢呀 717 00:48:44,856 --> 00:48:47,617 我是想告訴你這件衣服跟你根本不配 718 00:48:47,656 --> 00:48:49,350 光是顏色就不適合 719 00:48:49,390 --> 00:48:53,981 如果你的肚子這麼大的話 就不要穿這些衣服嘛 720 00:48:55,056 --> 00:48:59,147 我們可以到隔壁村去看看呀 721 00:48:59,189 --> 00:49:02,587 走吧,走…去隔壁村看看 722 00:49:09,721 --> 00:49:10,778 我老婆! 723 00:49:13,988 --> 00:49:15,215 很有內涵 724 00:49:16,255 --> 00:49:18,311 是啊!她是很好 725 00:49:21,188 --> 00:49:22,313 發哥 726 00:49:32,887 --> 00:49:34,876 來… 727 00:49:42,620 --> 00:49:43,984 來… 728 00:50:09,319 --> 00:50:11,945 老公,你從今天早上回來笑到現在 729 00:50:11,986 --> 00:50:14,713 有什麼事情這麼好笑的? 730 00:50:15,586 --> 00:50:19,074 早上看到一個肥婆掉進水渠裏 731 00:50:19,352 --> 00:50:23,579 肥婆掉進水渠裏有什麼好笑的? 732 00:50:23,718 --> 00:50:25,241 肥婆! 733 00:50:26,752 --> 00:50:28,241 水渠啊 734 00:50:32,285 --> 00:50:33,148 老婆 735 00:50:33,852 --> 00:50:35,283 這麼久以來… 736 00:50:35,885 --> 00:50:36,612 你聽我說 737 00:50:36,652 --> 00:50:37,447 說吧 738 00:50:37,918 --> 00:50:39,941 三餐都是粗茶淡飯 739 00:50:40,884 --> 00:50:42,248 你會不會介意啊? 740 00:50:42,318 --> 00:50:43,443 看你啦! 741 00:50:43,518 --> 00:50:45,847 如果你一天不介意吃我煮的菜 742 00:50:45,884 --> 00:50:47,350 我也無所謂了 743 00:50:48,418 --> 00:50:50,008 這麼久以來… 744 00:50:50,517 --> 00:50:54,143 我除了有一些偉大曠世的 發明送給你之外 745 00:50:54,185 --> 00:50:55,810 連一顆寶石都沒送給你 746 00:50:55,851 --> 00:50:56,908 你沒有意見吧? 747 00:50:56,951 --> 00:50:58,008 我有意見! 748 00:50:58,050 --> 00:51:00,039 那個什麼掃帚拖鞋 749 00:51:00,083 --> 00:51:02,379 搞得我要用兩隻腳掃地 750 00:51:02,417 --> 00:51:03,905 白白空出兩隻手來 751 00:51:03,950 --> 00:51:05,541 結果一隻手要擦窗戶 752 00:51:05,584 --> 00:51:07,277 另外一隻手還要洗衣服 753 00:51:07,317 --> 00:51:08,976 不知道有多麻煩呀 754 00:51:09,017 --> 00:51:10,381 你終於發覺了! 755 00:51:10,417 --> 00:51:11,314 對呀!對呀! 756 00:51:11,350 --> 00:51:13,907 還有呀,你那台爛抽油煙機呀 757 00:51:13,950 --> 00:51:14,813 怎麼樣? 758 00:51:14,850 --> 00:51:17,975 我實在懶得跟你講,我講起都生氣! 759 00:51:18,017 --> 00:51:18,948 應該的 760 00:51:18,983 --> 00:51:20,972 你呀,到底藏了什麼寶石? 761 00:51:21,017 --> 00:51:22,710 趕快拿出來給我看 762 00:51:38,982 --> 00:51:39,879 老婆 763 00:51:44,549 --> 00:51:45,378 你怎麼了? 764 00:51:49,715 --> 00:51:51,647 你是不是搶劫了? 765 00:51:53,115 --> 00:51:55,274 我…我沒有搶劫呀 766 00:51:55,581 --> 00:51:57,774 因為我醫好了一個很有錢的病人 767 00:51:57,815 --> 00:51:59,213 他拿了很多醫藥費給我 768 00:51:59,248 --> 00:52:00,975 我買來送給你的 769 00:52:17,947 --> 00:52:18,844 老婆! 770 00:52:18,880 --> 00:52:21,278 你不要過來,你不要管我 771 00:52:21,314 --> 00:52:22,405 你沒事吧? 772 00:52:22,547 --> 00:52:25,308 我一時太開心了,不能夠控制自己 773 00:52:27,713 --> 00:52:29,009 好漂亮呀 774 00:52:30,014 --> 00:52:31,206 我愛你,老公 775 00:52:34,380 --> 00:52:35,311 我也愛你 776 00:52:36,146 --> 00:52:37,112 一生一世 777 00:52:45,546 --> 00:52:48,637 阿發,我聽說城裏面 最大的一間妓院慧賢雅敘 778 00:52:48,679 --> 00:52:51,611 新來了一位金國美女,叫做琴操 779 00:52:51,712 --> 00:52:54,872 又琴又操 光聽這個名字就讓人流鼻血了 780 00:52:54,913 --> 00:52:56,344 你盡快去查查她的底 781 00:52:56,379 --> 00:52:58,607 如果沒有問題,就帶她來給我 782 00:52:59,145 --> 00:53:00,236 不會吧,皇上? 783 00:53:00,279 --> 00:53:02,767 這次怎麼派這麼好的任務給我? 784 00:53:03,345 --> 00:53:05,106 你是我的親信嘛 785 00:53:05,479 --> 00:53:08,501 而且,人人都知道你又專一又疼老婆 786 00:53:08,545 --> 00:53:10,102 絕不會搶我的女人 787 00:53:10,378 --> 00:53:11,901 這個任務非你莫屬了 788 00:53:12,212 --> 00:53:13,507 請恕微臣直言 789 00:53:14,244 --> 00:53:16,904 皇上已經有後宮佳麗三千 790 00:53:17,611 --> 00:53:20,099 為什麼還要出去偷吃呢? 791 00:53:32,477 --> 00:53:35,239 皇上你… 後宮佳麗到! 792 00:54:07,709 --> 00:54:08,800 你現在終於明白了? 793 00:54:12,075 --> 00:54:13,063 完全明白 794 00:54:14,242 --> 00:54:15,605 皇上,你再撐著點 795 00:54:16,276 --> 00:54:17,401 微臣… 796 00:54:18,542 --> 00:54:19,872 盡快為你搞定它 797 00:54:20,642 --> 00:54:22,301 他媽的,你兩個新來的嗎? 798 00:54:22,341 --> 00:54:25,069 慧賢雅敘是高級場所 你以為是低級妓院嗎? 799 00:54:25,208 --> 00:54:26,231 我們只招待會員 800 00:54:26,275 --> 00:54:28,138 回去帶夠錢再來入會 801 00:54:28,842 --> 00:54:31,467 豈有此理!我玩女人這麼多年了 802 00:54:31,508 --> 00:54:32,871 沒有像今天這麼沒面子 803 00:54:32,908 --> 00:54:34,965 老子帶人來砸這場子好不好? 804 00:54:35,808 --> 00:54:36,774 閉嘴 805 00:54:37,341 --> 00:54:57,003 豈有此理…豈有此理 806 00:54:57,507 --> 00:54:59,132 老鴇就是我呀 807 00:54:59,174 --> 00:55:01,140 老伯,聽說你想賣女兒 808 00:55:01,174 --> 00:55:02,140 先看看什麼貨色 809 00:55:03,073 --> 00:55:05,732 她可算得上是人間尤物呀 810 00:55:05,907 --> 00:55:06,930 你看 811 00:55:17,106 --> 00:55:18,402 怎麼樣呀? 812 00:55:18,840 --> 00:55:20,271 我很想打人 813 00:55:20,906 --> 00:55:23,031 能不能讓我狠狠的賞她幾記耳光呀? 814 00:55:23,672 --> 00:55:27,798 你不要那麼刻薄!出來撈的時候 也要給別人一點台階下呀 815 00:55:27,839 --> 00:55:30,896 你想打我幾耳光 我又何嘗不想用亂棍打你呢! 816 00:55:31,039 --> 00:55:33,800 你媽的頭,居然敢這樣跟我講話? 817 00:55:33,839 --> 00:55:36,862 我們這兒的姑娘,個個都是國色天香 818 00:55:37,006 --> 00:55:39,870 尤其是那幾個金國來的佳麗 819 00:55:39,906 --> 00:55:41,337 說了你都不相信 820 00:55:41,372 --> 00:55:45,065 大大的眼睛,高高的鼻子,小小的嘴 821 00:55:45,838 --> 00:55:47,304 叫她們出來比一比啊 822 00:55:47,438 --> 00:55:50,801 比什麼!人家連挖鼻孔的 樣子都比你美上一百遍! 823 00:55:50,838 --> 00:55:52,031 你們倆個趕快滾吧 824 00:55:52,071 --> 00:55:53,559 要不然我真的賞你幾耳光呀 825 00:55:53,604 --> 00:55:54,695 出來了 826 00:55:54,738 --> 00:55:56,966 金國佳麗出場了 827 00:56:48,936 --> 00:56:49,697 小姐 828 00:56:50,836 --> 00:56:52,392 賞面跳舞嗎? 829 00:57:48,533 --> 00:57:49,829 幹嘛? 830 00:57:49,866 --> 00:57:53,457 你站在那兒既不動也不吭聲 831 00:57:53,499 --> 00:57:57,431 你是不會跳舞呢還是不會說話呀? 832 00:57:58,599 --> 00:57:59,496 我不認識你 833 00:58:01,032 --> 00:58:04,294 我姓琴,單名一個操! 834 00:58:09,832 --> 00:58:11,627 阿發,好多女人呀 835 00:58:12,299 --> 00:58:14,628 阿發…阿發 836 00:58:27,832 --> 00:58:29,058 老婆! 837 00:58:29,398 --> 00:58:31,261 老公,你回來啦? 838 00:58:35,798 --> 00:58:38,787 老公呀,我做了一件 衣服準備生日那天來穿的 839 00:58:38,831 --> 00:58:39,762 你看漂不漂亮? 840 00:58:40,397 --> 00:58:42,795 紅紅綠綠的,好花俏啊 841 00:58:44,697 --> 00:58:48,629 那天我還請了爹娘跟 親戚朋友一起來吃飯 842 00:58:48,664 --> 00:58:50,687 你呀,要記得早點回來 843 00:58:52,863 --> 00:58:54,523 記不記得? 844 00:59:03,730 --> 00:59:07,355 老公,怎麼你的身上會有香味呀? 845 00:59:08,596 --> 00:59:11,892 你的鼻子還真靈 我特地買了胭脂水粉送你 846 00:59:12,329 --> 00:59:14,659 你為什麼要買胭脂水粉送給我呢? 847 00:59:14,696 --> 00:59:15,956 你生日嘛 848 00:59:16,663 --> 00:59:17,753 好乖! 849 00:59:18,329 --> 00:59:19,226 你快點去洗澡吧 850 00:59:19,263 --> 00:59:20,320 好呀!一起洗 851 00:59:20,595 --> 00:59:22,459 我洗過了,死鬼,你快點去洗澡吧 852 00:59:22,496 --> 00:59:25,393 再洗一次會死呀? 你快點去洗澡呀 853 00:59:45,895 --> 00:59:49,657 老鴇就是我 歡迎閣下成為慧賢雅敘的新會員 854 00:59:52,128 --> 00:59:53,116 看到閣下的樣子 855 00:59:53,162 --> 00:59:57,685 我硬是有一點不知道是什麼十分的 心裏面又… 856 00:59:57,728 --> 01:00:00,853 感覺到有一些神奇的那種… 857 01:00:00,894 --> 01:00:03,360 當然就是想狠狠打幾個耳光的那種呀 858 01:00:06,394 --> 01:00:07,553 是了… 859 01:00:07,693 --> 01:00:09,182 是了… 860 01:00:09,227 --> 01:00:09,920 是了! 861 01:00:10,261 --> 01:00:11,249 對了! 862 01:00:11,994 --> 01:00:13,482 你這裏是不是有一位琴操姑娘? 863 01:00:13,760 --> 01:00:14,691 有!有 864 01:00:14,860 --> 01:00:15,826 我想馬上見她 865 01:00:15,894 --> 01:00:17,189 你想見琴操姑娘? 866 01:00:17,627 --> 01:00:20,354 這裏所有人都要見琴操姑娘呀 867 01:00:20,693 --> 01:00:25,318 排隊啦!別以為自己英俊 又有才華就可以不用排隊了 868 01:00:25,493 --> 01:00:26,550 有才華都讓你看得出來? 869 01:00:26,593 --> 01:00:28,354 我還看得出你很真誠 870 01:00:28,393 --> 01:00:29,983 又有愛心 871 01:00:30,026 --> 01:00:31,117 當朋友真是一流 872 01:00:31,326 --> 01:00:32,655 糟了!居然讓你看出來 873 01:00:32,692 --> 01:00:33,885 那我一會要請吃飯了! 874 01:00:34,126 --> 01:00:35,455 當然要啦! 875 01:00:35,492 --> 01:00:36,822 排隊啦! 876 01:00:37,492 --> 01:00:38,822 臭小子! 877 01:01:02,125 --> 01:01:03,454 琴操姑娘!…我等了你好久了 878 01:01:03,491 --> 01:01:07,253 大家冷靜一點!… 879 01:01:07,291 --> 01:01:10,018 琴操姑娘說想請大家喝一杯酒 880 01:01:10,057 --> 01:01:12,023 先到那邊去拿個杯子 881 01:01:14,658 --> 01:01:15,953 我要一杯 882 01:01:19,291 --> 01:01:21,848 琴操姑娘!我們先飲為敬 883 01:01:23,224 --> 01:01:27,451 很難喝…什麼來的? 884 01:01:27,490 --> 01:01:28,387 好酒! 885 01:01:30,557 --> 01:01:34,489 所謂葡萄美酒夜光杯 欲飲琵琶馬上摧 886 01:01:34,990 --> 01:01:39,684 這杯葡萄酒,芳香醇厚 應該有一百多年的歷史 887 01:01:39,723 --> 01:01:42,780 相信是西域上貢給周王的貢品 888 01:01:43,157 --> 01:01:44,214 真的那麼有價值? 889 01:01:44,257 --> 01:01:45,552 太誇大其詞了吧,兄弟? 890 01:01:45,890 --> 01:01:47,220 你完全錯了! 891 01:01:47,257 --> 01:01:48,916 你骨碌一聲就吞下去了 892 01:01:48,956 --> 01:01:50,115 別說是酒呀 893 01:01:50,157 --> 01:01:52,020 尿你也分不出是甜的咸的 894 01:01:52,056 --> 01:01:55,385 飲酒有如美人,要喝得其法 895 01:01:56,422 --> 01:01:58,149 那一位把舌頭借我用一用? 896 01:01:58,889 --> 01:02:00,048 有沒有長一點的? 897 01:02:01,089 --> 01:02:02,055 對了 898 01:02:02,656 --> 01:02:05,712 我們的味蕾分佈在舌頭的表面 899 01:02:05,755 --> 01:02:07,221 下面就沒有了 900 01:02:07,256 --> 01:02:09,744 甜的味蕾呢是分佈在舌尖 901 01:02:09,789 --> 01:02:13,243 苦的味蕾呢,就在喉嚨的附近 902 01:02:13,789 --> 01:02:14,846 不要插太深 903 01:02:14,889 --> 01:02:16,514 好好,我弄前面一點 904 01:02:16,789 --> 01:02:19,687 酸的味蕾就分佈在舌頭的兩側 905 01:02:19,722 --> 01:02:21,153 所以我們品嚐美酒的時候 906 01:02:21,188 --> 01:02:23,279 要把舌頭捲成一圈 907 01:02:25,588 --> 01:02:27,383 你差得遠了,有得練了! 908 01:02:30,088 --> 01:02:32,553 這樣就可以避開兩邊酸的味蕾 909 01:02:32,587 --> 01:02:36,179 而讓酒在甜跟苦的味蕾之間徘徊 910 01:02:36,221 --> 01:02:39,209 先甜後苦,亦苦亦甜 911 01:02:40,420 --> 01:02:41,943 就好像… 912 01:02:44,220 --> 01:02:46,118 初戀的感覺一樣 913 01:02:56,987 --> 01:03:00,544 恭喜…琴操姑娘請你到花廳一聚 914 01:03:03,419 --> 01:03:04,942 琴操姑娘… 別急… 915 01:03:16,119 --> 01:03:18,516 公子何以… 916 01:03:18,619 --> 01:03:20,279 好像很不舒服似的? 917 01:03:20,319 --> 01:03:23,716 又坐立難安,莫非掛念家中嬌妻? 918 01:03:23,752 --> 01:03:27,684 姑娘…怎知我家中已有妻子? 919 01:03:28,352 --> 01:03:30,477 中原人士大多早婚 920 01:03:30,918 --> 01:03:32,782 我看公子成熟穩重 921 01:03:32,818 --> 01:03:34,182 想必成婚已久 922 01:03:34,818 --> 01:03:35,875 過獎了 923 01:03:36,118 --> 01:03:39,550 聽姑娘語氣,不像是中原人士 924 01:03:39,651 --> 01:03:41,140 我是金國人 925 01:03:41,185 --> 01:03:42,616 你不會有種族歧視吧? 926 01:03:42,785 --> 01:03:44,808 怎麼會呢?別傻了… 927 01:03:46,484 --> 01:03:48,110 姑娘你好像 928 01:03:48,251 --> 01:03:49,342 胖了又瘦了 929 01:03:50,284 --> 01:03:51,716 你好悶呀 930 01:03:51,751 --> 01:03:52,774 給我一點驚喜 931 01:03:52,950 --> 01:03:54,177 姑娘想要驚喜嗎? 932 01:03:54,551 --> 01:03:55,278 你有沒有呀? 933 01:03:55,584 --> 01:03:57,072 不要太小看我 934 01:03:57,384 --> 01:03:57,974 拿出來 935 01:03:58,251 --> 01:03:59,978 真的要我拿出來? 936 01:04:00,251 --> 01:04:00,773 拿呀 937 01:04:03,683 --> 01:04:04,478 送給你 938 01:04:10,184 --> 01:04:11,513 很漂亮,謝謝 939 01:04:12,617 --> 01:04:14,082 姑娘果然不同凡響 940 01:04:14,483 --> 01:04:16,540 尋常女子如果見到這顆夜明珠 941 01:04:16,583 --> 01:04:17,844 輕則驚呼狂叫 942 01:04:17,883 --> 01:04:19,349 重則吐血身亡 943 01:04:19,383 --> 01:04:22,645 姑娘視珠寶錢財如糞土 這份情操,真是… 944 01:04:22,916 --> 01:04:24,439 驚天地泣鬼神 945 01:04:35,083 --> 01:04:37,742 公子今晚是否有時間留下 946 01:04:37,783 --> 01:04:39,339 促膝長談呀? 947 01:04:40,649 --> 01:04:43,114 家中已經燒好了飯菜,不太方便! 948 01:04:43,415 --> 01:04:44,880 不方便你又來? 949 01:04:46,681 --> 01:04:51,239 如此良辰美景,貓兒也動情 950 01:04:51,948 --> 01:04:54,176 你曉不曉得那隻貓在說什麼? 951 01:04:54,782 --> 01:04:55,907 那隻貓說: 952 01:04:56,548 --> 01:04:58,377 別搞了,媽媽會罵! 953 01:05:07,114 --> 01:05:09,739 姑娘為何要這樣作賤自己呀? 954 01:05:12,680 --> 01:05:15,374 不作賤又怎麼會痛快呢? 955 01:05:15,647 --> 01:05:16,544 這麼神奇 956 01:05:17,014 --> 01:05:20,446 還有很多神奇的,公子一定沒試過 957 01:05:21,180 --> 01:05:23,044 如果今晚你留下 958 01:05:23,081 --> 01:05:26,274 小女子一定施展渾身解數 959 01:05:26,547 --> 01:05:29,035 保證公子大開眼界 960 01:05:38,213 --> 01:05:38,735 我不能這麼做 961 01:05:38,780 --> 01:05:40,871 我已經有老婆,我愛我老婆 962 01:05:40,913 --> 01:05:43,310 雖然我想,但是我要控制自己 963 01:05:43,479 --> 01:05:44,604 死就死吧,誰怕誰呀? 964 01:05:44,646 --> 01:05:46,111 來… 965 01:05:48,179 --> 01:05:51,612 正所謂易求無價寶,難得有情郎 966 01:05:51,646 --> 01:05:53,635 公子既然心中只有嬌妻 967 01:05:53,679 --> 01:05:54,974 我也不必勉強 968 01:05:55,012 --> 01:05:55,841 送客! 969 01:05:55,879 --> 01:05:56,607 是 970 01:05:57,146 --> 01:05:58,771 等… 公子請回 971 01:05:58,812 --> 01:06:00,539 不是,我剛剛想通了 972 01:06:00,578 --> 01:06:01,601 公子請回 973 01:06:01,645 --> 01:06:03,168 真是冤枉,褲子也脫了一半了 974 01:06:03,212 --> 01:06:04,109 給個機會嘛 975 01:06:04,146 --> 01:06:05,338 算了吧!公子 976 01:06:06,578 --> 01:06:08,840 琴操姑娘 977 01:06:26,511 --> 01:06:30,705 乾杯… 978 01:06:32,377 --> 01:06:33,809 好酒… 979 01:06:34,677 --> 01:06:37,643 老公,你怎麼一整個 晚上都傻呼呼的? 980 01:06:38,577 --> 01:06:41,100 我從來沒有像現在這麼聰明呀 981 01:06:42,011 --> 01:06:43,943 你的碗裏沒有添飯 982 01:06:47,577 --> 01:06:51,737 老公,我發現那天晚上 你送給我的胭脂水粉 983 01:06:51,776 --> 01:06:54,833 跟你那天回來時候 身上的味道不一樣啊 984 01:06:55,243 --> 01:06:56,539 我沒告訴你嗎? 985 01:06:57,010 --> 01:06:59,669 那是用一種叫做神奇麝香做成的 986 01:06:59,709 --> 01:07:02,334 它的味道會隨著不同的時辰而轉變 987 01:07:02,376 --> 01:07:04,501 到了晚上,就會變成臭臭的 988 01:07:05,843 --> 01:07:08,172 沒有呀,沒有臭臭的 989 01:07:09,142 --> 01:07:09,938 臭氣撲鼻了 990 01:07:11,042 --> 01:07:14,940 還有呀 那天你送我那顆特大號的珍珠 991 01:07:14,975 --> 01:07:16,907 我本來想今天晚上拿出來揚一下 992 01:07:16,942 --> 01:07:18,840 可是我找來找去都找不到 993 01:07:18,875 --> 01:07:20,398 你知不知道放在哪兒呀? 994 01:07:20,808 --> 01:07:21,865 世事就是這樣 995 01:07:21,908 --> 01:07:23,272 你越是急於找一樣東西呢 996 01:07:23,309 --> 01:07:24,774 它就偏偏不讓你找到 997 01:07:24,808 --> 01:07:26,172 你聰明的話就根本別找 998 01:07:26,209 --> 01:07:28,107 它就會自己慢慢的出現了 999 01:07:29,308 --> 01:07:32,069 岳父,來,吃個雞屁股 1000 01:07:33,074 --> 01:07:34,131 我忽然想起來了 1001 01:07:34,174 --> 01:07:35,834 那天你去妓院幹什麼? 1002 01:07:35,941 --> 01:07:36,669 妓院? 1003 01:07:36,708 --> 01:07:37,537 妓院呀! 1004 01:07:37,575 --> 01:07:38,472 你說什麼? 1005 01:07:38,708 --> 01:07:42,935 我說我親眼看到他去妓院 1006 01:07:50,874 --> 01:07:51,635 你們聽我說 1007 01:07:51,674 --> 01:07:52,571 等一下 1008 01:07:56,107 --> 01:07:57,403 不要說謊話 1009 01:07:57,440 --> 01:07:58,928 我聽一下就知道了 1010 01:08:05,607 --> 01:08:08,198 雞也是女人,也會生病 1011 01:08:08,840 --> 01:08:13,295 我作為一個婦科聖手 到妓院去幫她們看病 1012 01:08:13,339 --> 01:08:16,499 天經地義呀 1013 01:08:16,840 --> 01:08:18,931 女兒,他的心跳有沒有加快? 1014 01:08:25,573 --> 01:08:26,334 沒有 1015 01:08:29,439 --> 01:08:31,371 還好 1016 01:08:31,639 --> 01:08:32,900 對不起呀老公 1017 01:08:37,372 --> 01:08:39,270 你不相信我你真是該死呀 1018 01:09:19,570 --> 01:09:21,729 好香呀老公,你聞到嗎? 1019 01:09:35,737 --> 01:09:37,498 這位姑娘請問找那一位? 1020 01:09:37,869 --> 01:09:39,062 我來買藥的 1021 01:09:39,370 --> 01:09:41,097 請問有沒有『當歸』呀? 1022 01:09:41,569 --> 01:09:44,195 你是不是真的這麼急呀!改天再來嘛 1023 01:09:44,802 --> 01:09:46,098 我有一個心愛的男人 1024 01:09:46,136 --> 01:09:47,499 他沒有來找我 1025 01:09:47,535 --> 01:09:50,093 我買『當歸』只不過求一個意頭 1026 01:09:50,136 --> 01:09:51,431 盼他當夜歸來 1027 01:09:54,269 --> 01:09:56,735 姑娘,我建議你買『獨活』 1028 01:09:57,402 --> 01:09:59,425 獨自生活,別再那麼多事了 1029 01:10:00,801 --> 01:10:04,733 你身上的味道好特別呀 好像似曾相識 1030 01:10:04,768 --> 01:10:08,825 是呀,我用的水粉叫奪魄勾魂 1031 01:10:08,868 --> 01:10:10,925 全省城只我一個有 1032 01:10:12,002 --> 01:10:15,195 聽說奪魄勾魂 可以迷盡天下男人,是嗎? 1033 01:10:20,835 --> 01:10:22,959 可惜沒辦法迷到我心愛的男人 1034 01:10:24,067 --> 01:10:25,794 無論我怎麼作賤自己 1035 01:10:25,834 --> 01:10:28,595 他還是丟下我,回來陪老婆吃飯 1036 01:10:29,368 --> 01:10:31,334 所以我專誠來見一見夫人 1037 01:10:36,634 --> 01:10:38,600 今天我女兒過生日 1038 01:10:38,634 --> 01:10:40,031 你不要來搗蛋呀 1039 01:10:42,200 --> 01:10:43,223 你現在見到了 1040 01:10:44,066 --> 01:10:45,225 好美呀 1041 01:10:46,100 --> 01:10:46,725 比你美 1042 01:10:48,033 --> 01:10:48,556 送客 1043 01:10:48,600 --> 01:10:49,463 夫人 1044 01:10:51,066 --> 01:10:52,622 原來今天是你的生日 1045 01:10:52,866 --> 01:10:54,264 我沒準備什麼 1046 01:10:54,400 --> 01:10:57,059 不如就將這個小玩意送給夫人 1047 01:11:08,798 --> 01:11:10,025 你有沒有搞錯? 1048 01:11:10,566 --> 01:11:14,657 沒錯!我已經說了你不想找它的時候 它就會自己出現了 1049 01:11:15,732 --> 01:11:18,255 開什麼玩笑?送給她? 1050 01:11:19,431 --> 01:11:22,226 你送給我的東西 我怎麼捨得送人呢? 1051 01:11:22,498 --> 01:11:24,987 你們兩個到底是什麼關係? 快點講清楚 1052 01:11:27,031 --> 01:11:30,361 看起來,已經很清楚了嘛 1053 01:11:30,765 --> 01:11:31,923 你這個混蛋! 1054 01:11:33,131 --> 01:11:35,154 你這樣對我女兒,你還算是人嗎? 1055 01:11:35,897 --> 01:11:37,090 這位老先生不要衝動呀 1056 01:11:37,131 --> 01:11:38,392 快把珍珠還給我 1057 01:11:38,731 --> 01:11:40,220 夫人,你不要衝動嘛 1058 01:11:44,164 --> 01:11:46,288 你這個狐貍精,我跟你拼了! 1059 01:11:50,130 --> 01:11:50,892 不要動 不要動 1060 01:11:51,831 --> 01:11:53,126 你戳她,我戳死你 1061 01:11:54,697 --> 01:11:55,957 你戳我,我戳他 1062 01:11:56,597 --> 01:11:57,857 不關我的事呀大姐 1063 01:11:58,197 --> 01:11:59,356 你們快阻止她 1064 01:12:03,097 --> 01:12:04,256 賤人! 1065 01:12:09,596 --> 01:12:10,721 把馬放下來 1066 01:12:11,363 --> 01:12:12,351 你說什麼,老公? 1067 01:12:13,162 --> 01:12:15,253 把馬放下來 1068 01:12:15,296 --> 01:12:17,558 你嚇到我的朋友了 1069 01:12:19,062 --> 01:12:20,221 你說謊話 1070 01:12:20,762 --> 01:12:22,353 你說過你會愛我一生一世 1071 01:12:22,762 --> 01:12:24,126 你也說謊呀 1072 01:12:24,162 --> 01:12:26,390 你說你屬兔,結果你屬虎 1073 01:12:26,662 --> 01:12:28,026 足足大我一歲 1074 01:12:29,662 --> 01:12:32,594 你說謊話,你說謊話 1075 01:12:32,929 --> 01:12:34,224 把馬放下來 1076 01:12:34,262 --> 01:12:35,319 別想趁我不注意丟過來 1077 01:12:35,362 --> 01:12:36,623 你以為我不知道你呀? 1078 01:12:44,462 --> 01:12:45,553 全部給我放下! 1079 01:12:47,961 --> 01:12:49,052 你沒事吧? 1080 01:12:49,095 --> 01:12:49,924 沒事 1081 01:12:49,961 --> 01:12:52,189 對不起,破壞你們的宴會 1082 01:12:52,694 --> 01:12:54,284 全因為我太想見你 1083 01:12:54,327 --> 01:12:56,157 我實在太任性了,告辭 1084 01:12:57,028 --> 01:12:58,186 我跟你一起走 1085 01:12:58,227 --> 01:13:00,250 這種鬼地方我留下來也沒意思 1086 01:13:00,294 --> 01:13:01,021 走! 1087 01:13:02,960 --> 01:13:04,119 老公 1088 01:13:07,294 --> 01:13:09,351 你肚子餓不餓?我煮碗麵給你吃 1089 01:13:19,426 --> 01:13:20,221 你等等 1090 01:13:28,892 --> 01:13:30,051 丟臉 1091 01:13:30,093 --> 01:13:32,718 不要生氣嘛,我們回到慧賢雅敘 1092 01:13:32,759 --> 01:13:33,816 我幫你那個 1093 01:13:33,859 --> 01:13:34,620 那個? 1094 01:13:34,659 --> 01:13:36,057 就是那個嘛 1095 01:13:37,626 --> 01:13:41,683 沒人性呀,你不是人! 1096 01:13:42,126 --> 01:13:43,352 老天爺呀 1097 01:14:14,057 --> 01:14:16,455 我們總算有情人終成眷屬了 1098 01:14:16,757 --> 01:14:20,246 就在今天閃電之夜 正是我們辦事之時 1099 01:14:20,824 --> 01:14:22,381 你的樣子好賤呀 1100 01:14:22,424 --> 01:14:24,083 更賤的你還沒見過哩 1101 01:14:24,124 --> 01:14:26,283 好!聽我說嘛 1102 01:14:26,324 --> 01:14:27,721 我有點內疚呀! 1103 01:14:27,757 --> 01:14:29,814 剛剛害得你老婆好傷心! 1104 01:14:29,857 --> 01:14:32,254 為了你,不要說是我老婆 命都可以不要 1105 01:14:32,290 --> 01:14:33,654 不可以亂講話 1106 01:14:34,423 --> 01:14:37,877 我真的不想騙你 其實我是皇上身邊的大內密探 1107 01:14:37,923 --> 01:14:41,481 人稱保龍一族 專門負責秘密保護皇上 1108 01:14:41,523 --> 01:14:44,045 我當初來這找你是皇上看上了你 1109 01:14:44,090 --> 01:14:45,454 叫我來摸清你的底細 1110 01:14:46,756 --> 01:14:49,881 皇上叫你來摸清我的底細 現在你摸我 1111 01:14:49,923 --> 01:14:51,411 豈不是犯了欺君之罪 1112 01:14:51,756 --> 01:14:53,278 為了要摸你有什麼辦法呢? 1113 01:14:53,756 --> 01:14:55,278 管他去死呀 1114 01:14:56,155 --> 01:14:57,416 靈靈發! 1115 01:15:04,322 --> 01:15:06,810 皇上,還好你及時趕到 1116 01:15:08,422 --> 01:15:10,546 他剛剛說的話你都聽到了? 1117 01:15:10,588 --> 01:15:11,213 你 1118 01:15:11,289 --> 01:15:13,652 如果不是琴操姑娘以密函通知皇上 1119 01:15:13,688 --> 01:15:17,984 也不知道靈靈發 你這個狗奴才跟皇上搶女人! 1120 01:15:18,188 --> 01:15:19,211 你… 1121 01:15:19,488 --> 01:15:23,318 為了讓這只禽獸露出他本來的面目 1122 01:15:23,355 --> 01:15:26,617 我不惜用清白之軀作賭注 1123 01:15:27,088 --> 01:15:30,486 皇上,如果你來遲半步 1124 01:15:30,954 --> 01:15:32,783 那麼我不曉得… 1125 01:15:33,321 --> 01:15:34,650 你… 1126 01:15:34,854 --> 01:15:38,581 靈靈發 你知不知道你犯了誅九族之罪 1127 01:15:38,721 --> 01:15:39,812 皇上,我… 1128 01:15:39,854 --> 01:15:40,649 抓住他 1129 01:15:53,087 --> 01:15:54,746 皇上,為何鎖住我? 1130 01:15:55,653 --> 01:15:59,142 你這招一石三鳥之計,真是天衣無縫 1131 01:15:59,320 --> 01:16:02,013 先要我家破人亡 1132 01:16:02,486 --> 01:16:05,350 再讓皇上誅我九族 1133 01:16:05,386 --> 01:16:08,648 順便捉住皇上,然後要脅朝廷 1134 01:16:08,686 --> 01:16:11,481 接著大軍南下 到時候佔領我們中原土地 1135 01:16:11,519 --> 01:16:12,848 就易如反掌 1136 01:16:12,885 --> 01:16:13,613 哮 1137 01:16:14,353 --> 01:16:15,148 可惜我送你一個 1138 01:16:15,186 --> 01:16:18,482 凡是女人見到就會 發狂的夜明珠給你的時候 1139 01:16:18,519 --> 01:16:21,007 你表現得非常冷靜,我就已經知道你 1140 01:16:21,052 --> 01:16:23,540 不是女人 1141 01:16:24,552 --> 01:16:26,609 普天之下,跟我有深仇大恨 1142 01:16:26,652 --> 01:16:28,208 又整容整得那麼美的 1143 01:16:28,252 --> 01:16:30,241 就只有一個沒臉的老傢伙 1144 01:16:30,685 --> 01:16:32,776 無相皇,你這個賤人 1145 01:16:32,819 --> 01:16:34,375 我最恨人家扮女人來騙我 1146 01:16:34,418 --> 01:16:35,883 尤其扮這麼美的美女來勾引我 1147 01:16:35,918 --> 01:16:37,646 還好我們發哥聰明 1148 01:16:37,685 --> 01:16:38,809 一早就把你給揭穿了 1149 01:16:39,118 --> 01:16:39,674 皇上 1150 01:16:40,485 --> 01:16:41,451 你千萬別信他 1151 01:16:41,485 --> 01:16:43,916 他為了佔有我不惜拋妻棄家 1152 01:16:43,951 --> 01:16:46,110 甚至在我的面前毒打他的老婆 1153 01:16:46,684 --> 01:16:47,650 他簡直不是人 1154 01:16:47,918 --> 01:16:49,508 為了引你入局 1155 01:16:49,551 --> 01:16:52,381 我們一家大小剛剛是在家裏演戲呀 1156 01:16:52,718 --> 01:16:54,377 各位觀眾 1157 01:16:54,417 --> 01:16:55,474 最佳女主角 1158 01:17:04,917 --> 01:17:06,076 在剛才的戲裏面 1159 01:17:06,117 --> 01:17:08,810 她充份表現出一個被 老公拋棄的妻子的那份… 1160 01:17:08,850 --> 01:17:10,611 唏噓跟坎坷 1161 01:17:10,883 --> 01:17:13,076 不論是在眼神 表情以至動作行為方面 1162 01:17:13,117 --> 01:17:15,776 她都能夠演得出絲絲入扣,入木三分 1163 01:17:16,216 --> 01:17:18,079 尤其最後摔掉那隻馬的動作 1164 01:17:18,116 --> 01:17:22,549 更加能夠表現出後現代主義 跟對這個社會的強烈控訴 1165 01:17:22,583 --> 01:17:24,139 我們再來看看她是如何摔斷那隻馬的 1166 01:17:24,183 --> 01:17:25,978 她摔了,她摔了! 1167 01:17:28,516 --> 01:17:29,913 發嫂,恭喜你了,恭喜 1168 01:17:29,949 --> 01:17:31,881 謝謝… 1169 01:17:33,449 --> 01:17:35,813 首先,我要謝謝我爹跟我娘 1170 01:17:35,849 --> 01:17:38,144 因為他們一直在我身邊支持我 1171 01:17:38,182 --> 01:17:40,648 另外我要謝謝我的老公 1172 01:17:40,682 --> 01:17:43,045 因為他給我這個機會讓我演這場戲 1173 01:17:43,082 --> 01:17:45,173 他很辛苦的跟我排練了好久 1174 01:17:45,215 --> 01:17:47,874 所以這個獎有一半是屬於你的 1175 01:17:47,915 --> 01:17:49,074 老公,謝謝你 1176 01:17:51,515 --> 01:17:54,639 好了,馬上頒發今晚的壓軸大獎 1177 01:17:54,681 --> 01:17:57,147 相信大家一定猜到,沒錯 1178 01:17:57,182 --> 01:17:59,773 最佳男主角就是 1179 01:17:59,815 --> 01:18:01,111 阿發的岳父! 1180 01:18:02,548 --> 01:18:04,377 太好了! 1181 01:18:09,880 --> 01:18:13,278 其實這個獎不是我拿還有誰拿呢? 1182 01:18:13,647 --> 01:18:15,613 我親眼看到他進妓院! 1183 01:18:16,614 --> 01:18:18,205 對不起,請等等 1184 01:18:18,248 --> 01:18:20,146 剛剛那場戲我從頭帶到尾 1185 01:18:20,181 --> 01:18:22,271 看上去是水準之作,有目共睹 1186 01:18:22,313 --> 01:18:23,279 你怎會把獎給那個人? 1187 01:18:23,313 --> 01:18:26,075 你也不錯,但是流於表面 1188 01:18:26,113 --> 01:18:28,602 就像剛剛你老婆聽你心跳那場戲 1189 01:18:28,647 --> 01:18:31,306 表情做足,略嫌浮誇 1190 01:18:31,347 --> 01:18:33,370 那些是世俗人對我的看法 1191 01:18:33,413 --> 01:18:35,106 你該不會也不識貨吧? 1192 01:18:35,146 --> 01:18:37,634 不對了,老公,我聽心跳的時候 1193 01:18:37,679 --> 01:18:40,271 真的感覺不到我跟你有交流 1194 01:18:40,313 --> 01:18:42,471 只覺得你好像完全沒有辦法入戲 1195 01:18:42,512 --> 01:18:43,944 你真的不是很會演戲呀 1196 01:18:43,980 --> 01:18:45,139 你… 1197 01:18:45,180 --> 01:18:46,805 聽我說句公道話 1198 01:18:46,846 --> 01:18:48,175 一句就好 1199 01:18:48,212 --> 01:18:50,144 你不懂演戲呀 1200 01:18:50,179 --> 01:18:52,805 閉嘴!現在琴操的身份未明 1201 01:18:52,846 --> 01:18:55,209 你們還有心情在這裏搞什麼頒獎典禮 1202 01:18:55,246 --> 01:18:56,041 根本是亂來的 1203 01:18:56,878 --> 01:18:58,242 皇上,我… 1204 01:18:58,279 --> 01:18:59,609 小心鼻毛呀! 1205 01:19:00,945 --> 01:19:04,400 我是一個願意為皇上上刀山的人 1206 01:19:04,446 --> 01:19:07,310 今日,就讓我用我的肉體 1207 01:19:07,345 --> 01:19:09,368 去檢驗琴操的真身 1208 01:19:11,578 --> 01:19:12,771 閃開 1209 01:19:16,044 --> 01:19:16,476 小心 1210 01:19:35,444 --> 01:19:37,672 靈靈發,你殺我妻兒 1211 01:19:37,711 --> 01:19:39,404 就算不能夠誅你九族 1212 01:19:39,444 --> 01:19:41,569 今日我也要你碎屍萬段 1213 01:19:41,611 --> 01:19:42,906 你們一個也不能走 1214 01:19:42,943 --> 01:19:43,806 保護皇上 1215 01:19:43,843 --> 01:19:45,639 佛印,把我那個百寶箱扔過來 1216 01:19:47,110 --> 01:19:49,667 百寶箱在此,接住 1217 01:19:54,409 --> 01:19:57,398 你幹嘛叫我把它丟給你呀? 1218 01:19:57,443 --> 01:19:58,409 這下玩完了! 1219 01:19:58,810 --> 01:20:00,207 那我對不起了! 1220 01:20:03,576 --> 01:20:04,542 不痛呀! 1221 01:20:07,042 --> 01:20:09,065 打中的沒事,隔壁的那個倒霉了 1222 01:20:09,176 --> 01:20:10,937 這就是無相神功 1223 01:20:10,976 --> 01:20:13,965 是一種可以將能量移轉的武功 1224 01:20:28,642 --> 01:20:29,801 兄弟,你沒事吧? 1225 01:20:29,975 --> 01:20:31,202 我好怕呀 1226 01:20:31,874 --> 01:20:33,431 不過我沒事 1227 01:20:33,475 --> 01:20:34,906 還舒服哩! 1228 01:20:35,008 --> 01:20:36,338 真是打中了都沒事呀 1229 01:20:36,375 --> 01:20:37,306 那我就不怕了 1230 01:20:37,342 --> 01:20:38,273 讓我來 1231 01:20:45,808 --> 01:20:48,433 兄弟,你不是說很舒服嗎? 1232 01:20:48,941 --> 01:20:50,531 真的很舒服嘛 1233 01:20:50,574 --> 01:20:51,562 算啦 1234 01:20:51,974 --> 01:20:53,997 你還是打那位兄弟吧 1235 01:20:59,140 --> 01:21:00,537 這也不是辦法 1236 01:21:01,673 --> 01:21:04,503 算了,麻煩你還是打我吧 1237 01:21:11,807 --> 01:21:13,204 世事難預料 1238 01:21:18,573 --> 01:21:23,732 無色無相,幻化萬象 無相無色,萬壽無疆 1239 01:21:23,772 --> 01:21:25,863 天下唯我獨尊 1240 01:21:43,072 --> 01:21:44,333 是誰? 1241 01:21:44,439 --> 01:21:45,530 好姐妹 1242 01:21:45,571 --> 01:21:46,764 全靠你啦! 1243 01:21:48,504 --> 01:21:50,561 移魂大法 1244 01:22:14,837 --> 01:22:16,064 頭暈!撐不住了 1245 01:22:17,804 --> 01:22:20,167 這種彫蟲小技,你想嚇唬誰呀? 1246 01:22:25,503 --> 01:22:27,628 你以為普通一條鐵鐵 就可以鎖住我嗎? 1247 01:22:28,570 --> 01:22:32,899 這條鐵鐵主要不是鎖住你 只用來連接屋頂上那個引雷燈 1248 01:22:32,936 --> 01:22:36,130 不是說打雷閃電之夜 就是我們辦事之時嗎? 1249 01:22:36,170 --> 01:22:38,499 今晚就賞你一個五雷轟頂 1250 01:22:42,736 --> 01:22:43,463 Yeah! 1251 01:22:43,502 --> 01:22:43,991 Yeah! 1252 01:22:44,036 --> 01:22:44,626 Yeah! 1253 01:22:44,703 --> 01:22:46,191 Yeah… 1254 01:23:57,233 --> 01:23:58,392 別動! 1255 01:24:20,232 --> 01:24:20,993 天 1256 01:24:23,031 --> 01:24:23,928 外 1257 01:24:25,931 --> 01:24:26,919 飛 1258 01:24:29,898 --> 01:24:30,625 僊 1259 01:25:59,628 --> 01:26:03,185 原來就是五雷轟頂打中了阿發 1260 01:26:03,228 --> 01:26:06,023 讓他身體裏面的細胞變大 1261 01:26:06,061 --> 01:26:09,027 功力等於武林高手苦練了一百年 1262 01:26:09,061 --> 01:26:12,084 所以阿發能夠使用天外飛僊 1263 01:26:12,393 --> 01:26:16,758 但是那個時候我好像 隱約見到個美女飛翔於天際 1264 01:26:16,794 --> 01:26:19,884 到底是氣流撞擊所產生的幻覺 1265 01:26:19,926 --> 01:26:22,085 還是我喝醉了呢? 1266 01:26:22,893 --> 01:26:24,223 當然是你喝醉了! 1267 01:26:24,893 --> 01:26:26,552 那你不是喝得更多? 1268 01:26:26,593 --> 01:26:28,116 我每天都喝醉 1269 01:26:29,093 --> 01:26:31,718 奇怪,阿發怎麼今天 這麼晚還沒來上班呢? 1270 01:26:32,126 --> 01:26:34,489 發哥,你在哪裏? 1271 01:26:35,060 --> 01:26:36,753 我們沒有你不行呀 1272 01:26:36,793 --> 01:26:37,884 發哥,回來吧 1273 01:26:39,159 --> 01:26:41,216 老公!好偉大呀 1274 01:26:41,259 --> 01:26:45,692 你這個發明拂拂拂拂拂 就可以垂直升降,任意飛翔 1275 01:26:45,726 --> 01:26:47,521 不如我們幫它取個名字叫做… 1276 01:26:47,559 --> 01:26:48,388 直升機呀? 1277 01:26:48,426 --> 01:26:50,289 不好…這個名字不夠威風呀! 1278 01:26:50,326 --> 01:26:51,451 不如叫做 1279 01:26:51,491 --> 01:26:53,616 拂拂拂拂拂拂機 1280 01:26:53,658 --> 01:26:54,555 好聰明呀老婆 1281 01:26:54,592 --> 01:26:57,115 對呀…不然怎麼做你老婆呢? 1282 01:26:57,258 --> 01:26:59,554 老公,我們再飛去看一看 1283 01:27:01,992 --> 01:27:04,651 好浪漫呀 對 1284 01:27:04,692 --> 01:27:07,885 我要幫你生一個兒子 1285 01:27:07,924 --> 01:27:09,822 真的嗎? 真的 1286 01:27:09,857 --> 01:27:12,618 好!我們馬上回家做 1287 01:27:12,724 --> 01:27:13,951 不行…我等不及了 1288 01:27:13,991 --> 01:27:16,014 不如我們就在這兒做! 1289 01:27:16,058 --> 01:27:18,649 不是吧 來吧! 86553

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