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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:33,058 --> 00:00:35,456
月圓之夜
2
00:00:36,092 --> 00:00:38,489
紫禁之巔
3
00:00:38,725 --> 00:00:41,247
一劍西來
4
00:00:41,358 --> 00:00:45,018
天外飛僊
5
00:01:03,057 --> 00:01:06,080
今日有幸,見到當代兩大劍客決鬥
6
00:01:06,124 --> 00:01:09,022
我陸小鳳與你花滿樓,都不枉此生了
7
00:01:09,056 --> 00:01:12,682
是呀,西門吹雪和葉孤城兩人的寶劍
尚未出鞘
8
00:01:12,724 --> 00:01:15,053
劍氣已經瀰漫四周了
9
00:01:15,090 --> 00:01:18,079
此劍乃海外寒劍精英,吹毛斷髮
10
00:01:18,123 --> 00:01:21,089
劍鋒三尺三,淨重六斤四兩
11
00:01:21,123 --> 00:01:22,520
此劍乃天下利器
12
00:01:22,556 --> 00:01:25,488
劍鋒三尺七寸,淨重七斤十三兩
13
00:01:25,522 --> 00:01:29,011
西門吹雪
你有沒有把握接我這招天外飛僊?
14
00:01:29,056 --> 00:01:32,180
葉城主,我已經準備好了
15
00:01:38,055 --> 00:01:39,021
天
16
00:01:41,222 --> 00:01:42,449
外
17
00:01:44,456 --> 00:01:45,422
飛
18
00:01:47,155 --> 00:01:48,450
僊
19
00:01:52,622 --> 00:01:53,315
什麼人?
20
00:01:53,355 --> 00:01:56,048
是誰這麼大膽敢在
皇上屋頂打架?報上名來
21
00:01:56,255 --> 00:01:58,778
在下白雲城主葉孤城
22
00:02:00,755 --> 00:02:03,050
葉孤城?!
23
00:02:03,288 --> 00:02:09,187
還有我,冷如冰,寒如雪
劍客西門吹雪
24
00:02:10,520 --> 00:02:15,010
還有我,風流盲俠花滿樓
25
00:02:15,520 --> 00:02:20,145
還有我四條眉毛
人見人愛,陸小鳳!
26
00:02:21,053 --> 00:02:25,179
阿…陸…小鳳呀
27
00:02:27,487 --> 00:02:30,009
人見人愛呀?!
28
00:02:31,153 --> 00:02:33,516
你可知你妨礙了兩大高手決鬥?
29
00:02:33,553 --> 00:02:34,576
你是什麼人?
30
00:02:34,620 --> 00:02:36,246
保龍一族,靈靈發
31
00:02:36,287 --> 00:02:39,980
負責秘密保護皇上
還有保護皇宮內外一切產業
32
00:02:40,020 --> 00:02:45,008
現在聽著,陸小鳳、花滿樓
葉孤城、西門吹雪
33
00:02:45,052 --> 00:02:47,644
你們幾個老傢伙居然闖入私人禁地
34
00:02:47,686 --> 00:02:49,117
非法集會
35
00:02:49,152 --> 00:02:50,516
罪名是在公共地方行為不檢
36
00:02:50,553 --> 00:02:53,110
你不要老傢伙長老傢伙短的
37
00:02:53,152 --> 00:02:55,277
高手不一定要長得多英俊
38
00:02:55,319 --> 00:02:59,512
只不過是你們這些
星斗市民一廂情願的想法罷了
39
00:02:59,552 --> 00:03:02,018
是呀!難道大俠就不能禿頭嗎?
40
00:03:02,052 --> 00:03:05,381
也沒有像你們這麼不修邊幅的
41
00:03:08,685 --> 00:03:10,082
給我們一條生路吧?
42
00:03:10,818 --> 00:03:13,284
這是絕版獨家秘笈呀,拿去!
43
00:03:13,318 --> 00:03:15,079
送給你!快點開鎖呀
44
00:03:15,252 --> 00:03:19,082
就憑你這本爛書就想脫身?
做夢呀你!
45
00:03:19,484 --> 00:03:20,711
我葉孤城的名號你沒聽過?
46
00:03:20,751 --> 00:03:23,047
當然沒聽過啦,你不是很有名!閃開
47
00:03:23,085 --> 00:03:27,312
小老弟,給個面子
好歹我也是西…
48
00:03:27,351 --> 00:03:30,181
就是因為你不是東西!
所以我不給你面子
49
00:03:30,317 --> 00:03:33,078
混蛋,我是中原第一盲俠
50
00:03:35,084 --> 00:03:36,982
盲了就不要學人家爬得那麼高啦
51
00:03:37,017 --> 00:03:38,778
會摔死的!老伯!
52
00:03:39,217 --> 00:03:42,740
太過份了
我陸小鳳只要靈犀一指你就…
53
00:03:42,783 --> 00:03:47,113
我也會呀!一指呀
看到沒有?好好學著!
54
00:03:47,283 --> 00:03:49,977
全部趴下,雙手放在頭上
55
00:03:50,017 --> 00:03:53,039
少說派你們坐個十年八年的牢
56
00:03:53,083 --> 00:03:54,606
這一次真的不會放過你們了
57
00:03:54,650 --> 00:03:56,115
真是沒面子
58
00:03:56,149 --> 00:03:58,308
各位兄弟,我們不要跟他一般見識
59
00:03:58,350 --> 00:03:59,680
不如改日再戰
60
00:04:08,649 --> 00:04:10,342
這麼厲害?!
61
00:06:22,410 --> 00:06:24,773
保龍一族成員
62
00:06:24,810 --> 00:06:26,106
靈靈恭
63
00:06:26,710 --> 00:06:28,074
靈靈喜
64
00:06:28,376 --> 00:06:29,399
靈靈發
65
00:06:30,110 --> 00:06:31,167
靈靈財
66
00:06:31,743 --> 00:06:35,573
誓死效忠皇上
67
00:06:36,043 --> 00:06:38,031
誓死效忠皇上
68
00:06:44,009 --> 00:06:45,066
鐵布衫
69
00:06:52,142 --> 00:06:54,233
衣服破了 是呀…
70
00:07:22,107 --> 00:07:24,130
好…
71
00:07:36,040 --> 00:07:37,165
碎石腳
72
00:07:51,673 --> 00:07:52,661
五形拳
73
00:07:53,106 --> 00:07:53,663
龍
74
00:07:54,440 --> 00:07:55,201
蛇
75
00:07:56,540 --> 00:07:57,369
虎
76
00:07:58,006 --> 00:07:58,664
豹
77
00:07:58,772 --> 00:07:59,738
鶴
78
00:08:22,005 --> 00:08:22,629
好!
79
00:08:47,437 --> 00:08:48,369
幹什麼?
80
00:08:48,670 --> 00:08:51,034
這兩塊石頭產於北方極地之下
81
00:08:51,071 --> 00:08:53,332
共分兩面,有神奇的力量
82
00:08:53,370 --> 00:08:55,700
陽面和陽面在一起會同性相拒
83
00:08:55,737 --> 00:08:57,032
不能互碰
84
00:08:57,070 --> 00:08:59,502
而陰面跟陽面在一起就會異性相吸
85
00:08:59,537 --> 00:09:01,093
非常神奇
86
00:09:01,136 --> 00:09:03,295
實在是一個重大的發現
87
00:09:03,704 --> 00:09:06,363
微臣想將它獻給皇上
88
00:09:06,403 --> 00:09:08,028
這有什麼用呀?
89
00:09:11,636 --> 00:09:15,125
上面兩位宮女
以後就不用搖扇子搖得那麼辛苦了
90
00:09:15,170 --> 00:09:17,635
剛剛兩塊不合適,現在看看這一個
91
00:09:18,003 --> 00:09:19,559
將這兩塊葉子連在一起
92
00:09:19,603 --> 00:09:21,432
再用雙手快速轉動
93
00:09:21,469 --> 00:09:25,026
就會造成強烈的氣流,形成旋風
94
00:09:29,502 --> 00:09:32,797
你說,天氣熱的時候
有一把這個東西,不是挺好的嗎?
95
00:09:33,336 --> 00:09:36,234
不知道皇上有沒有興趣
代理我這個新產品?
96
00:09:36,269 --> 00:09:39,099
請皇上恕罪,微臣沒有好好管教部下
97
00:09:39,135 --> 00:09:40,191
實在是我失職
98
00:09:40,235 --> 00:09:42,167
靈靈發,你不要胡鬧!
99
00:09:42,201 --> 00:09:44,599
對了,我想到一個方法
可以破你的鐵布衫
100
00:09:44,635 --> 00:09:45,464
佛印
101
00:09:45,735 --> 00:09:46,723
來了
102
00:09:51,668 --> 00:09:54,565
我發現將木炭、硝石、硫磺
103
00:09:54,601 --> 00:09:56,760
擺在一個小小的空間裏
104
00:09:56,801 --> 00:09:58,358
比如,人的口中
105
00:09:59,101 --> 00:10:01,067
再加進一顆小小的鋼珠
106
00:10:03,134 --> 00:10:05,100
當裏面引爆的時候
107
00:10:05,133 --> 00:10:08,065
固體變成氣體
氣體澎漲產生強大力量
108
00:10:08,100 --> 00:10:08,997
將這顆鋼珠迫出來
109
00:10:09,033 --> 00:10:11,056
威力足以斷石分金
110
00:10:11,100 --> 00:10:13,123
鐵布衫馬上變成一件破衣服
111
00:10:13,167 --> 00:10:14,394
你說什麼?
112
00:10:14,434 --> 00:10:15,660
好,來!
113
00:10:17,633 --> 00:10:19,395
佛印,準備好沒有?
114
00:10:25,033 --> 00:10:26,623
這種武器唯一的缺點
115
00:10:26,666 --> 00:10:29,154
就是爆炸的時候嘴巴會產生高溫
116
00:10:30,033 --> 00:10:32,498
所以佛印的嘴一定要經過特別訓練
117
00:10:33,166 --> 00:10:36,462
剛開始在嘴巴最嫩的時候
先吃點很熱的灌湯餃和小籠包
118
00:10:36,666 --> 00:10:39,257
要不然就是喝熱湯的時候一飲而盡
119
00:10:40,566 --> 00:10:43,430
佛印的嘴已經能夠承受一百度的高溫
120
00:10:44,333 --> 00:10:47,355
我告訴你
就算吃魚翅也能夠吃得比別人快
121
00:10:47,398 --> 00:10:48,523
能多吃兩碗
122
00:10:48,565 --> 00:10:49,792
只不過!
123
00:10:50,132 --> 00:10:52,495
奉勸各位小朋友,千萬別學呀!
124
00:11:00,398 --> 00:11:01,727
成功了沒有呀?
125
00:11:05,098 --> 00:11:05,995
還差一點點
126
00:11:06,031 --> 00:11:08,259
我好像覺得我的嘴巴不見了
127
00:11:08,298 --> 00:11:09,388
只是變大了
128
00:11:09,431 --> 00:11:10,988
到底有多大呀?
129
00:11:11,031 --> 00:11:13,156
很大的,你放心吧!
130
00:11:13,664 --> 00:11:16,028
差不多成功,就差一點點
131
00:11:16,065 --> 00:11:19,053
如果多給我一點時間改良的話
我應該就可以…
132
00:11:19,097 --> 00:11:20,154
住口!
133
00:11:21,164 --> 00:11:22,187
請皇上息怒
134
00:11:22,231 --> 00:11:23,753
阿發,你到底在搞什麼?
135
00:11:23,797 --> 00:11:24,922
搞些小小新意
136
00:11:24,964 --> 00:11:26,294
我問你搞什麼?
137
00:11:26,464 --> 00:11:28,656
就是東搞一下西搞一下嘛
138
00:11:29,130 --> 00:11:30,493
說呀!你搞什麼呀?
139
00:11:31,064 --> 00:11:32,996
你到底搞什麼東西呀?
皇上問你
140
00:11:33,530 --> 00:11:34,723
你搞什麼? 快點說!
141
00:11:35,130 --> 00:11:38,028
當然我也是想搞點新的東西出來
142
00:11:38,064 --> 00:11:40,359
你給我上來說!站這兒!
143
00:11:41,029 --> 00:11:41,791
快點,走快點…
144
00:11:41,996 --> 00:11:42,792
我來了!
145
00:11:43,029 --> 00:11:44,961
如果不是保龍一族代代相傳
146
00:11:44,996 --> 00:11:46,394
我早就把你趕出去了
147
00:11:46,430 --> 00:11:48,191
你現在給我滾下去
148
00:11:49,396 --> 00:11:52,089
我給你一個大夫的職位
讓你用來掩飾身份
149
00:11:52,129 --> 00:11:53,492
他選的是婦科大夫
150
00:11:53,529 --> 00:11:54,995
你看看你多沒出息呀!
151
00:11:55,129 --> 00:11:57,061
平常也不見你勤練功夫
152
00:11:57,096 --> 00:11:58,721
每天不知道在搞什麼鬼
153
00:11:58,762 --> 00:12:00,751
他昨天晚上還沒來開會哩
154
00:12:00,796 --> 00:12:02,023
你昨晚跑到哪兒去了?
155
00:12:02,063 --> 00:12:03,688
我上屋頂捉賊了皇上
156
00:12:03,729 --> 00:12:04,626
捉什麼賊呀?
157
00:12:04,662 --> 00:12:07,991
我捉到葉孤城,西門吹雪,跟陸小鳳
158
00:12:08,028 --> 00:12:09,324
雖然後來讓他們跑了
159
00:12:09,362 --> 00:12:11,055
可是我拿到一本秘笈呀
160
00:12:11,095 --> 00:12:11,992
那你拿到什麼秘笈呀?
161
00:12:12,295 --> 00:12:14,090
就是天外飛僊呀皇上
162
00:12:14,128 --> 00:12:15,684
那你練了沒有呢?
163
00:12:15,728 --> 00:12:17,024
練了一點呀!
164
00:12:17,062 --> 00:12:18,221
你馬上練給我看看
165
00:12:20,062 --> 00:12:22,687
這招就是天外飛僊
166
00:12:25,328 --> 00:12:27,317
他在耍你呀皇上
167
00:12:27,528 --> 00:12:31,255
馬上給我上來,快點,站這兒…
168
00:12:31,628 --> 00:12:33,820
來了… 快點…
169
00:12:33,861 --> 00:12:35,191
別裝蒜,快上來…
170
00:12:35,228 --> 00:12:35,750
來了…
171
00:12:35,794 --> 00:12:39,556
給我上來…
到了…
172
00:12:39,594 --> 00:12:40,151
現在立刻消失
173
00:12:40,194 --> 00:12:41,217
我告訴你
174
00:12:41,261 --> 00:12:43,726
我以後不要再看到你!
175
00:12:43,760 --> 00:12:45,783
連聲也不要聽到!
176
00:12:48,994 --> 00:12:55,222
保龍一族…
177
00:12:56,793 --> 00:12:57,623
好!
178
00:13:00,659 --> 00:13:01,590
好呀!
179
00:13:21,593 --> 00:13:22,785
大夫,我…
180
00:13:22,992 --> 00:13:24,288
我開點藥給你好嗎?
181
00:13:24,326 --> 00:13:28,951
你不要那麼急嘛
先聽我說完到底那裏不舒服呀
182
00:13:28,992 --> 00:13:32,015
有什麼不舒服都要開藥
沒別的辦法可行了
183
00:13:32,092 --> 00:13:33,058
拿藥
184
00:13:34,258 --> 00:13:35,281
給錢
185
00:13:36,158 --> 00:13:36,954
送客
186
00:13:36,992 --> 00:13:38,719
大夫,我大老遠到這裏來
187
00:13:38,758 --> 00:13:41,519
你先讓我說完那裏不舒服呀
188
00:13:41,558 --> 00:13:44,046
拜託你嘛,讓我說嘛
189
00:13:44,091 --> 00:13:46,580
我讓你一路回你家,一路說
190
00:13:46,625 --> 00:13:49,090
到你家還沒說完的話再從頭說一次
191
00:13:49,124 --> 00:13:49,987
下一位
192
00:13:51,091 --> 00:13:53,057
大夫,我不舒服呀
193
00:13:53,091 --> 00:13:54,386
我開點藥給你好嗎?
194
00:13:54,424 --> 00:13:56,583
我手腳冰冷,頭暈發熱
195
00:13:56,624 --> 00:14:00,181
氣虛血弱
有時候蹲下來再站起來還會頭暈呀
196
00:14:00,224 --> 00:14:02,349
那沒辦法了,連藥都省了
197
00:14:02,390 --> 00:14:03,980
回去準備辦後事吧
198
00:14:04,023 --> 00:14:06,989
有這麼嚴重?會不會是…
199
00:14:07,023 --> 00:14:09,682
女人一個月一次失血過多貧血怕冷
200
00:14:09,723 --> 00:14:11,985
生病或者是產後失調呀?
201
00:14:12,090 --> 00:14:13,283
有什麼根據呢?
202
00:14:13,324 --> 00:14:18,346
所謂脈象緩靜,血不養汗
舌頭發白,血不養肝嘛!
203
00:14:18,389 --> 00:14:20,514
那應該怎麼醫治呢?
204
00:14:21,256 --> 00:14:22,517
很簡單
205
00:14:22,556 --> 00:14:24,988
應該用天南星五錢,百合一錢半
206
00:14:25,022 --> 00:14:27,488
土丑星麻兩錢
史君子八分,夏枯草一兩
207
00:14:27,523 --> 00:14:31,649
以款冬花做藥引
再用文武火反覆互煎!
208
00:14:34,389 --> 00:14:37,616
藥已經抓好了,用八碗水煎成一碗
209
00:14:37,655 --> 00:14:38,985
藥到病除!
210
00:14:39,388 --> 00:14:40,547
多謝大夫
211
00:14:40,989 --> 00:14:41,784
送大夫
212
00:14:41,989 --> 00:14:43,080
下一…
213
00:14:46,388 --> 00:14:47,285
位?
214
00:14:49,088 --> 00:14:51,111
大夫,我的心好不舒服呀!
215
00:14:51,155 --> 00:14:53,018
開點藥給你吃好嗎?
216
00:14:53,288 --> 00:14:57,220
我家那個死鬼在外面養小老婆呀
217
00:14:58,988 --> 00:15:01,420
說他兩句就動手打人
218
00:15:02,055 --> 00:15:06,419
我受夠了
雖然粗暴的男人會讓我覺得刺激
219
00:15:06,688 --> 00:15:08,984
但是我真的受不了,我受不了啦
220
00:15:10,021 --> 00:15:12,384
大夫,你粗不粗暴?
221
00:15:14,987 --> 00:15:16,647
看情況呀…
222
00:15:17,588 --> 00:15:19,315
我也可以粗暴呀…
223
00:15:19,687 --> 00:15:23,983
好!我老公在外面玩,我也玩給他看
224
00:15:24,020 --> 00:15:25,077
來呀
225
00:15:27,054 --> 00:15:28,179
我看你有多粗!
226
00:15:31,120 --> 00:15:32,086
老婆!
227
00:15:32,420 --> 00:15:33,784
什麼事呀老公?
228
00:15:40,153 --> 00:15:41,483
這位姑娘…
229
00:15:41,752 --> 00:15:43,082
要我幫忙
230
00:15:43,119 --> 00:15:45,085
醫者父母心嘛
231
00:15:45,119 --> 00:15:48,573
人家大老遠趕來
你能夠幫忙就幫一下
232
00:15:49,320 --> 00:15:52,150
這位姑娘的手腳撐得這麼久
會不會累呀?
233
00:15:52,186 --> 00:15:53,481
我煮碗麵給你吃?
234
00:15:53,519 --> 00:15:55,110
我沒事了
235
00:15:58,752 --> 00:16:00,775
老婆,我乖不乖呀?
236
00:16:01,052 --> 00:16:02,609
我來了,你當然乖啦
237
00:16:02,652 --> 00:16:04,742
如果我沒有來,你會不會受誘惑呀?
238
00:16:04,785 --> 00:16:06,411
我可以對天發誓
239
00:16:06,452 --> 00:16:07,281
會!
240
00:16:09,018 --> 00:16:10,109
你這個死鬼!
241
00:16:13,085 --> 00:16:16,710
你再說一次
你是不是真的會受誘惑,講!
242
00:16:16,751 --> 00:16:17,648
會
243
00:16:18,218 --> 00:16:19,014
好!
244
00:16:31,184 --> 00:16:32,979
我不怕癢,傻瓜!
245
00:16:37,051 --> 00:16:38,516
咬就不玩了
246
00:16:38,550 --> 00:16:39,538
好呀!
247
00:16:51,283 --> 00:16:53,181
投降呀老婆!投降呀老婆!
248
00:16:53,217 --> 00:16:54,114
放手呀!
249
00:16:54,150 --> 00:16:56,082
我不放!我一放你就會撲過來
250
00:16:56,417 --> 00:16:58,406
我不會…我真的投降了
251
00:16:58,449 --> 00:16:59,972
我的手都快斷了,老婆快放手呀
252
00:17:00,016 --> 00:17:01,743
我不信!
253
00:17:07,249 --> 00:17:08,340
真的斷了!
254
00:17:10,783 --> 00:17:12,305
對不起呀老公
255
00:17:18,082 --> 00:17:19,173
你這個女人
256
00:17:19,482 --> 00:17:23,039
一手空手擒拿的武功練得這麼好
257
00:17:23,249 --> 00:17:26,942
師傅不單不會不高興
而且我的內心裏
258
00:17:26,982 --> 00:17:29,504
覺得很安慰,師傅…
259
00:17:31,015 --> 00:17:31,412
什麼?
260
00:17:31,448 --> 00:17:34,539
現在內心裏面正在
想些什麼你猜到了沒有?
261
00:17:34,582 --> 00:17:36,707
我還有獎品要給你哩
262
00:17:38,781 --> 00:17:40,644
你記不記得前兩天在廚房切蔥的時候
263
00:17:40,681 --> 00:17:41,738
切切切切
264
00:17:42,415 --> 00:17:44,040
切到了手指頭呀?
265
00:17:45,081 --> 00:17:47,070
現在我把這隻手送給你
266
00:17:47,114 --> 00:17:50,238
以後你就用自己的手抓住這隻手
267
00:17:50,280 --> 00:17:52,246
用這隻手按著那些蔥
268
00:17:52,280 --> 00:17:53,974
然後就算是切到也是切到這隻手
269
00:17:54,014 --> 00:17:55,979
不是切到自己的手
270
00:17:56,547 --> 00:17:58,536
你怎麼想到的?
271
00:17:59,980 --> 00:18:01,139
謝謝你呀老公!
272
00:18:01,180 --> 00:18:01,907
老婆!
273
00:18:01,947 --> 00:18:02,606
老公!
274
00:18:02,647 --> 00:18:03,442
老婆!
275
00:18:03,480 --> 00:18:04,343
老公!
276
00:18:04,980 --> 00:18:07,571
還有你說,掃地是最辛苦的?
277
00:18:07,613 --> 00:18:08,510
對呀
278
00:18:09,113 --> 00:18:11,136
我再送你這雙鞋
279
00:18:11,180 --> 00:18:13,146
你穿上之後呢,右腳就是掃帚
280
00:18:13,180 --> 00:18:14,202
左腳就是掃箕
281
00:18:14,246 --> 00:18:17,008
然後你可以一路走一路掃地
282
00:18:17,446 --> 00:18:18,707
張開嘴巴
283
00:18:19,313 --> 00:18:21,609
把垃圾都掃進你嘴裏
284
00:18:23,413 --> 00:18:25,174
不要!
285
00:18:26,745 --> 00:18:28,041
等等…
286
00:18:29,046 --> 00:18:30,205
你覺得怎麼樣?
287
00:18:31,712 --> 00:18:35,644
老公,我覺得你是
一個很偉大的發明家!
288
00:18:35,979 --> 00:18:37,239
還有呢?
289
00:18:37,979 --> 00:18:39,002
還有…
290
00:18:39,046 --> 00:18:41,068
我好愛你呀
291
00:18:41,212 --> 00:18:42,075
我都是…
292
00:18:42,111 --> 00:18:42,577
睡吧
293
00:18:42,612 --> 00:18:44,373
但是我想試一下
294
00:18:45,011 --> 00:18:46,568
要試就試這一個
295
00:18:53,412 --> 00:18:54,536
是老鼠呀
296
00:18:54,711 --> 00:18:57,643
這次我利用老鼠出力來產生力量
297
00:18:57,678 --> 00:19:00,439
再利用齒輪將這種力量大量增加
298
00:19:00,477 --> 00:19:02,204
繼而推動這個升降台
299
00:19:03,144 --> 00:19:06,702
於是呢就可以反覆
舉起一兩百斤重的東西
300
00:19:07,177 --> 00:19:10,632
老公,上次我們用
那個蒸氣發動不好嗎?
301
00:19:11,077 --> 00:19:14,373
蒸氣發動每次一到
緊要關頭水就燒幹不會動了!
302
00:19:14,411 --> 00:19:15,967
你說它好不好呀?
303
00:19:16,211 --> 00:19:17,199
說得也對呀
304
00:19:17,244 --> 00:19:18,709
就是差了一點嘛對不對?
305
00:19:18,743 --> 00:19:21,039
而且這一次我最大的突破
306
00:19:21,077 --> 00:19:24,009
是可以依不同的需要
選擇不同的速度
307
00:19:24,044 --> 00:19:25,032
你看!
308
00:19:36,176 --> 00:19:38,540
老婆,你說我厲不厲害呀?
309
00:19:39,109 --> 00:19:40,574
你好賤呀!
310
00:19:40,776 --> 00:19:41,969
那還用說?
311
00:19:43,176 --> 00:19:45,471
老公,那個『後』是什麼意思呀?
312
00:19:45,509 --> 00:19:46,975
後就是向後嘛
313
00:19:47,043 --> 00:19:48,031
讓我試試看!
314
00:19:48,076 --> 00:19:49,007
不要!
315
00:20:04,975 --> 00:20:05,702
行不行得通呀?
316
00:20:05,741 --> 00:20:09,503
行得通!
我用你這個搖控鴛鴦鏟來炒菜
317
00:20:09,541 --> 00:20:11,700
真的一滴油也不會噴到我身上呀!
318
00:20:11,741 --> 00:20:15,400
鴛鴦鏟當然好用啦!
我說的是那個抽油煙機呀
319
00:20:15,441 --> 00:20:16,464
抽油煙機?
320
00:20:16,708 --> 00:20:18,537
那你多轉幾次讓我看看
321
00:20:26,107 --> 00:20:30,233
真的可以!
你這台抽油煙機真的可以抽油煙呀
322
00:20:30,640 --> 00:20:32,106
還可以鍛煉身體哩!
323
00:20:32,141 --> 00:20:34,470
對呀,還可以鍛煉身體呀!
324
00:20:34,507 --> 00:20:35,268
老公
325
00:20:35,307 --> 00:20:36,069
老婆
326
00:20:36,107 --> 00:20:36,663
老公
327
00:20:36,707 --> 00:20:37,229
老婆
328
00:20:37,273 --> 00:20:38,001
老公
329
00:20:38,041 --> 00:20:38,631
我借給你玩一下
330
00:20:38,674 --> 00:20:39,731
好呀!
331
00:20:57,006 --> 00:20:59,267
好像鬼一樣的那個又來了!
332
00:21:02,172 --> 00:21:03,729
那裏不舒服呀?
333
00:21:04,072 --> 00:21:06,265
大夫…
334
00:21:07,039 --> 00:21:08,096
這裏只有我們兩個
335
00:21:08,139 --> 00:21:10,128
你扮女人已經夠了
336
00:21:10,172 --> 00:21:13,002
你還學女人說話你想殺死我呀?
337
00:21:13,072 --> 00:21:16,232
身為保龍一族的情報人員
338
00:21:16,272 --> 00:21:20,704
我應該神不知鬼不覺的隱藏身份
339
00:21:21,405 --> 00:21:22,530
小心點好
340
00:21:24,538 --> 00:21:27,163
大夫…
341
00:21:27,738 --> 00:21:30,203
我是不是有了?
342
00:21:31,338 --> 00:21:33,929
是呀,吃了這包藥把他打掉
343
00:21:33,971 --> 00:21:35,437
你還有什麼不舒服的快點說呀
344
00:21:35,671 --> 00:21:37,035
佛印說…
345
00:21:37,071 --> 00:21:39,003
不要再學女人說話了
346
00:21:39,038 --> 00:21:40,265
佛印說…
347
00:21:40,305 --> 00:21:43,032
躺低一點,不要讓我看到你的樣子
348
00:21:43,238 --> 00:21:48,465
佛印說
有重要任務叫你馬上返回秘密基地
349
00:21:48,504 --> 00:21:49,992
早點說嘛
350
00:21:54,070 --> 00:21:55,297
阿發,機靈點呀
351
00:21:55,671 --> 00:21:59,467
這次這個艱巨的任務
能不能完成就靠你了
352
00:22:00,970 --> 00:22:03,198
秘密基地這幾天晚上都在辦大食會
353
00:22:03,536 --> 00:22:05,593
要是今天不把這些碗洗好
354
00:22:06,204 --> 00:22:08,102
一定抓你去坐牢的
355
00:22:08,203 --> 00:22:11,169
皇上駕到
356
00:22:13,069 --> 00:22:15,501
微臣聽到消息說,在金國境內
357
00:22:15,536 --> 00:22:18,297
上月有巨星落在天府之西
358
00:22:18,336 --> 00:22:18,960
是嗎?
359
00:22:19,002 --> 00:22:21,195
金人稱之為『天外飛僊』
360
00:22:21,236 --> 00:22:23,532
並且召集了各地的名醫
361
00:22:23,569 --> 00:22:25,660
來主持解剖天外飛僊
362
00:22:26,002 --> 00:22:28,331
解剖天外飛僊?
363
00:22:28,402 --> 00:22:30,368
在皇上的英明領道之下
364
00:22:30,402 --> 00:22:32,664
怎麼會發生這麼無知荒誕之事?
365
00:22:32,702 --> 00:22:35,930
我看一定是江湖術士裝神弄鬼的把戲
366
00:22:35,969 --> 00:22:37,628
這樣你也去看呀?
367
00:22:37,669 --> 00:22:40,134
這種人渣,就是被騙也是活該呀
368
00:22:40,368 --> 00:22:41,664
朕想去看看
369
00:22:41,735 --> 00:22:45,962
明知有這種結果
皇上依然勇敢的去面對這些事
370
00:22:46,001 --> 00:22:49,058
這真是勇氣可加,多麼的勇敢!
371
00:22:49,101 --> 00:22:52,692
只有在這麼有勇氣和
求知慾又強的皇上領道之下
372
00:22:52,734 --> 00:22:56,030
國家才可以自強不息,繁榮安定
373
00:22:56,068 --> 00:22:57,465
皇上萬歲!
374
00:22:58,134 --> 00:23:01,032
金國人奸詐狡猾,一定有陰謀
375
00:23:01,067 --> 00:23:03,158
皇上去的話,必定會有危險
376
00:23:03,301 --> 00:23:04,665
別管這麼多了
377
00:23:04,701 --> 00:23:06,257
這些碗洗不完你更危險
378
00:23:06,301 --> 00:23:08,233
但是我有責任一定要提醒皇上呀
379
00:23:08,267 --> 00:23:09,528
皇上萬歲…
380
00:23:09,567 --> 00:23:10,555
好!
381
00:23:10,600 --> 00:23:12,930
恭喜財,準備護駕上路
382
00:23:12,967 --> 00:23:13,933
明天起程
383
00:23:13,967 --> 00:23:14,523
是
384
00:23:14,567 --> 00:23:19,431
皇上萬歲…
385
00:23:20,067 --> 00:23:22,123
阿發,不要再說了
386
00:23:22,166 --> 00:23:24,496
皇上不想聽到你的聲音呀
387
00:23:24,533 --> 00:23:26,021
再說小心被砍頭呀!
388
00:23:26,066 --> 00:23:28,692
洗碗吧!不要…
389
00:23:34,500 --> 00:23:38,522
阿彌陀佛,又救了你一命
390
00:23:38,566 --> 00:23:40,429
我的碗你幫我洗了
391
00:23:47,299 --> 00:23:49,197
當然有陰謀呀!
392
00:23:50,432 --> 00:23:52,295
中原繁榮安定
393
00:23:52,599 --> 00:23:54,689
美女特別美
394
00:23:55,032 --> 00:23:57,554
俊男又特別俊呀
395
00:23:59,232 --> 00:24:01,527
我真希望見到我們金山教的旗幟
396
00:24:01,565 --> 00:24:03,156
飄揚在中原土地上
397
00:24:03,199 --> 00:24:05,596
漢人體弱士兵多病
398
00:24:05,631 --> 00:24:09,654
這次借解剖天外飛僊為名
召集中土名醫
399
00:24:09,698 --> 00:24:11,596
接著去把他們殺個片甲不留
400
00:24:11,631 --> 00:24:13,688
這樣敵軍缺乏醫治
401
00:24:13,731 --> 00:24:15,526
我軍就可以長驅南下
402
00:24:15,565 --> 00:24:19,621
到時候席捲中原
可以說是易如反掌呀
403
00:24:28,964 --> 00:24:31,930
你這個小子
平常看起來已經夠生氣了
404
00:24:31,964 --> 00:24:33,156
笑起來樣子更生氣
405
00:24:33,197 --> 00:24:34,992
我真不曉得為什麼你這麼生氣!
406
00:24:36,297 --> 00:24:37,422
你還說
407
00:24:37,963 --> 00:24:40,020
我見到你的樣子就已經夠生氣了!
408
00:24:40,063 --> 00:24:42,256
見到爹的樣子,就更生氣了!
409
00:24:45,663 --> 00:24:48,061
你不喜歡看到爹現在的樣子嗎?
410
00:24:48,096 --> 00:24:51,153
你爹是因為練了無相神功走火入魔
411
00:24:51,197 --> 00:24:53,129
以致面目全非呀
412
00:25:08,462 --> 00:25:10,950
甲二
413
00:25:10,995 --> 00:25:13,188
壬四
414
00:25:13,328 --> 00:25:14,056
中了沒有?
415
00:25:14,095 --> 00:25:15,287
中了
416
00:25:17,128 --> 00:25:22,060
丁四七
417
00:25:22,094 --> 00:25:26,220
辛二五
418
00:25:26,628 --> 00:25:27,321
中了沒有?
419
00:25:27,361 --> 00:25:29,327
二六
420
00:25:29,361 --> 00:25:30,486
再試試二五
421
00:25:30,528 --> 00:25:31,459
二五
422
00:25:31,495 --> 00:25:32,460
還是二六
423
00:25:32,494 --> 00:25:33,551
二六
424
00:25:33,594 --> 00:25:34,151
中了沒有?
425
00:25:34,195 --> 00:25:35,252
中了
426
00:25:36,360 --> 00:25:37,951
還有哪兒癢呀?
427
00:25:38,294 --> 00:25:40,954
丙一三四六八,加上丁一
428
00:25:41,194 --> 00:25:43,490
再補一條甲二戊四雙寶
429
00:25:44,160 --> 00:25:45,353
中了沒有?
430
00:25:46,960 --> 00:25:48,426
你怎麼那麼笨呀?這那會中呀?
431
00:25:48,460 --> 00:25:50,653
我不笨怎麼表示你聰明呀?
432
00:25:50,693 --> 00:25:52,682
拜託你不要再說我聰明了
433
00:25:53,093 --> 00:25:54,649
可是你的發明真的很棒呀
434
00:25:54,693 --> 00:25:56,091
誰說的?
435
00:25:56,127 --> 00:25:57,058
我說的
436
00:25:57,093 --> 00:25:57,956
貴姓呀?
437
00:25:57,993 --> 00:25:58,959
姓劉呀
438
00:25:58,993 --> 00:26:00,050
那一位呀,閣下
439
00:26:00,093 --> 00:26:01,024
你老婆!
440
00:26:01,060 --> 00:26:02,026
哮 哮
441
00:26:02,493 --> 00:26:03,516
你不要哮我!
442
00:26:03,560 --> 00:26:05,355
是你哮我我才會哮你的
443
00:26:06,226 --> 00:26:09,919
現在全世界只有你稱讚我
有什麼用呀?
444
00:26:09,959 --> 00:26:11,152
我才不管它有沒有用
445
00:26:11,193 --> 00:26:12,352
我就是覺得你很棒
446
00:26:12,393 --> 00:26:13,620
你棒我當然稱讚你了!
447
00:26:13,660 --> 00:26:14,591
你不懂我說的話?
448
00:26:14,626 --> 00:26:16,057
那你想說什麼呀?
449
00:26:16,092 --> 00:26:17,058
你不知道呀?
450
00:26:17,092 --> 00:26:18,580
我在外面做事已經很辛苦
451
00:26:18,625 --> 00:26:20,614
我有多辛苦你知道個屁呀!
452
00:26:21,659 --> 00:26:24,023
對呀!你每天出去做事我真的不知道
453
00:26:24,059 --> 00:26:26,286
我只相信你做的是好事
454
00:26:26,325 --> 00:26:28,120
誰得罪你了,你去把他罵回來
455
00:26:28,158 --> 00:26:29,647
你不要拿我當出氣筒
456
00:26:29,692 --> 00:26:31,055
因為我跟你熟呀
457
00:26:31,091 --> 00:26:31,920
那我就活該倒霉呀?
458
00:26:31,958 --> 00:26:33,322
不怕他媽的告訴你
459
00:26:33,358 --> 00:26:34,051
沒錯!
460
00:26:34,091 --> 00:26:34,920
所以你就…
461
00:26:34,958 --> 00:26:36,584
就拿你當我的出氣筒
462
00:26:36,625 --> 00:26:37,681
Yeah!
463
00:26:38,492 --> 00:26:40,014
不服氣呀?走呀!
464
00:26:56,324 --> 00:26:59,290
你怎麼會知道我躲在卓下面?
465
00:26:59,324 --> 00:27:01,085
你每次都躲在卓下面呀
466
00:27:01,124 --> 00:27:03,954
我有什麼辦法能夠
不知道你躲在卓下面呢?
467
00:27:04,623 --> 00:27:05,646
拜託你用點腦子想一想
468
00:27:05,690 --> 00:27:07,281
再找幾個新的地方來躲
469
00:27:07,324 --> 00:27:09,051
好讓我有一點新鮮感好吧?
470
00:27:09,090 --> 00:27:12,249
可是我不躲在卓下面
我怕你找不到我嘛!
471
00:27:15,690 --> 00:27:16,678
我真受不了你!
472
00:27:16,723 --> 00:27:18,382
你不要這個樣子,我拜託你好不好?
473
00:27:18,423 --> 00:27:20,412
老婆,你不要這個樣子,謝謝…
474
00:27:20,456 --> 00:27:23,183
我只是一個血肉之軀
你每次都這樣罵我
475
00:27:23,223 --> 00:27:24,621
我不知道那天我忍不下去了
476
00:27:24,657 --> 00:27:26,088
忍不下去你就走呀
477
00:27:26,256 --> 00:27:27,085
我去洗澡了
478
00:27:27,123 --> 00:27:28,952
我叫你走呀
479
00:27:29,256 --> 00:27:30,381
你會不會肚子餓呀?
480
00:27:30,422 --> 00:27:32,013
我煮碗麵給你吃
481
00:27:53,122 --> 00:27:55,213
對不起呀,是我不對
482
00:27:56,955 --> 00:27:58,114
我發神經
483
00:28:00,388 --> 00:28:01,319
算了
484
00:28:02,087 --> 00:28:04,519
究竟是什麼事讓你生那麼大的氣呀?
485
00:28:06,321 --> 00:28:09,014
在金國有個很重要的醫學會議
486
00:28:09,054 --> 00:28:11,020
我想去但沒有資格參加
487
00:28:11,188 --> 00:28:12,552
誰說你沒有?
488
00:28:12,588 --> 00:28:13,554
我說你有
489
00:28:16,021 --> 00:28:18,078
全世界說我沒有都無所謂
490
00:28:18,654 --> 00:28:19,677
你說我有就…
491
00:28:19,720 --> 00:28:20,651
行了!
492
00:28:43,486 --> 00:28:44,509
停!
493
00:28:50,319 --> 00:28:50,910
什麼事呀?
494
00:28:50,953 --> 00:28:53,145
荒山野嶺,居然出現幾個樵夫
495
00:28:53,186 --> 00:28:54,652
小心有詐
496
00:28:55,352 --> 00:28:56,375
你們是什麼人?
497
00:28:56,952 --> 00:28:59,077
我們是砍柴的
498
00:28:59,652 --> 00:29:01,948
不要擋我的路呀
499
00:29:02,152 --> 00:29:03,981
我是皇上
500
00:29:04,085 --> 00:29:05,983
全部閃開
501
00:29:08,652 --> 00:29:11,379
你們在路上千萬不要張揚
502
00:29:11,418 --> 00:29:14,179
這次我是微服出巡
不想讓人家知道我是皇上
503
00:29:14,451 --> 00:29:15,576
知道嗎?
504
00:29:16,984 --> 00:29:17,609
知道
505
00:29:17,884 --> 00:29:18,578
起轎
506
00:29:18,618 --> 00:29:20,516
起轎
507
00:29:36,818 --> 00:29:40,511
帶頭那個人呼吸細密,眼神銳利
508
00:29:40,551 --> 00:29:42,540
一定是長練氣功的高手
509
00:29:43,017 --> 00:29:45,609
帶鞭子的那一個步法穩健
510
00:29:45,650 --> 00:29:48,446
他的下盤功夫一定非常了得
511
00:29:48,750 --> 00:29:51,773
還有那個雙臂揮動有力
512
00:29:51,817 --> 00:29:54,442
我看是練上三路的高手
513
00:29:54,483 --> 00:29:57,881
這三個相信就是保龍一族的鐵布衫
514
00:29:57,917 --> 00:29:59,940
碎石腳跟五形拳
515
00:30:00,449 --> 00:30:02,881
保龍一族三大高手全都到齊了
516
00:30:02,916 --> 00:30:05,712
轎裏面那一個一定是當今皇帝
517
00:30:05,916 --> 00:30:08,178
本來想抓那些白癡大夫
518
00:30:08,216 --> 00:30:09,977
誰知道來了一個皇帝
519
00:30:10,016 --> 00:30:14,381
這一次真是踏破鐵鞋無覓處
得來全不費功夫!
520
00:30:27,248 --> 00:30:28,838
又怎麼了?
521
00:30:47,881 --> 00:30:48,812
護駕
522
00:33:34,808 --> 00:33:35,705
正點
523
00:33:35,741 --> 00:33:36,399
好噁心呀
524
00:33:36,440 --> 00:33:37,531
可以進場了
525
00:33:38,541 --> 00:33:41,098
老婆,那個解剖大會好像要開始了
526
00:33:41,240 --> 00:33:42,705
我們去看看
527
00:33:43,107 --> 00:33:45,436
這個解剖大會真的要見識一下
528
00:33:45,473 --> 00:33:47,439
『射』一聲挖開肚子
529
00:33:47,473 --> 00:33:49,133
『劃』的拉開層皮
530
00:33:49,174 --> 00:33:50,969
『光』的一聲腸子拉出來了
531
00:33:51,007 --> 00:33:53,370
接住『砰』的一聲,大便都出來了
532
00:33:53,406 --> 00:33:55,031
真是精彩過癮呀
533
00:33:55,339 --> 00:33:57,532
老公,我剛剛看到
市集好多新衣服在賣
534
00:33:57,573 --> 00:33:58,596
我去買衣服
535
00:33:58,640 --> 00:33:59,537
那等一下怎辦呀?
536
00:33:59,573 --> 00:34:01,834
等一下散會了你就到
賣衣服那一邊去找我
537
00:34:01,872 --> 00:34:02,838
就這樣子!
538
00:34:03,772 --> 00:34:05,136
不要到處亂跑啊
539
00:34:08,405 --> 00:34:09,167
請柬呢?
540
00:34:09,206 --> 00:34:10,137
請柬?
541
00:34:10,173 --> 00:34:11,433
就這種請柬呀
542
00:34:12,206 --> 00:34:14,933
通融一下啦,我也是大夫呀
543
00:34:14,972 --> 00:34:16,063
你是大夫?
544
00:34:16,105 --> 00:34:18,469
是呀,我很出名的
545
00:34:18,672 --> 00:34:20,001
那好吧,進去吧
546
00:34:20,205 --> 00:34:21,694
謝謝你呀兄弟
547
00:34:23,071 --> 00:34:24,002
死到臨頭還不知道
548
00:34:24,038 --> 00:34:24,901
什麼?
549
00:34:35,638 --> 00:34:41,798
大夫… 大夫…
550
00:34:44,604 --> 00:34:47,229
大夫…
551
00:34:50,304 --> 00:34:53,202
我最近發現了把川貝、桔梗、蜂蜜
552
00:34:53,237 --> 00:34:54,497
提煉成一種枇杷膏
553
00:34:54,537 --> 00:34:57,129
功能主治煙酒過多,睡眠不足
554
00:34:57,171 --> 00:34:59,534
喉嚨痛,聲音啞,一瓶就搞定了
555
00:34:59,570 --> 00:35:00,593
那你發財了
556
00:35:00,937 --> 00:35:02,732
我最近發現一種植物
557
00:35:02,770 --> 00:35:05,930
吃了之後呢會大笑大鬧,生不如死
558
00:35:05,969 --> 00:35:08,094
當地的土人稱之為大麻
559
00:35:08,170 --> 00:35:08,999
你更發呀
560
00:35:09,036 --> 00:35:10,730
這個一聽就知道是害人之物
561
00:35:10,769 --> 00:35:11,996
勸你還是自己知道就好了
562
00:35:12,036 --> 00:35:13,763
還有,看這個樣子不要吃太多了
563
00:35:13,803 --> 00:35:14,360
說的也是
564
00:35:14,403 --> 00:35:15,198
身上有沒有?
565
00:35:15,236 --> 00:35:15,497
來一點
566
00:35:15,536 --> 00:35:16,627
晚一點…
567
00:35:17,069 --> 00:35:19,194
這一位大夫,未曾見過
568
00:35:19,236 --> 00:35:21,997
戴著頂帽子兵分兩路這麼奇特
569
00:35:22,036 --> 00:35:23,228
不知在那兒高就?
570
00:35:23,269 --> 00:35:25,394
在下在京城專醫婦科
571
00:35:25,435 --> 00:35:26,560
是專看女人的?
572
00:35:26,736 --> 00:35:28,031
那你最發財了
573
00:35:30,402 --> 00:35:31,924
各位,各位
574
00:35:33,369 --> 00:35:35,494
各位朋友大家好
575
00:35:35,536 --> 00:35:39,400
歡迎各位收看我們
這個天外飛僊的解剖過程
576
00:35:39,768 --> 00:35:42,326
這個飛僊是極其珍貴的
577
00:35:42,369 --> 00:35:45,233
今晚是首次獨家大揭露
578
00:35:45,268 --> 00:35:47,098
怎麼沒有看見皇上呢?
579
00:35:47,135 --> 00:35:48,395
為了讓大家能夠看得清楚
580
00:35:48,434 --> 00:35:52,833
我們一連五晚不斷的重複
重複再重複
581
00:35:52,868 --> 00:35:54,527
珍貴的解剖過程
582
00:35:54,568 --> 00:35:59,829
務求讓大家能夠重複重複
再重複的看個仔細
583
00:35:59,901 --> 00:36:00,696
不用吧
584
00:36:00,734 --> 00:36:05,224
另外呢,我們找到發現飛僊的
那位農夫上來現身說法
585
00:36:05,334 --> 00:36:07,856
不過,現在讓我們先來訪問一下
586
00:36:07,901 --> 00:36:11,424
這位農夫的母親的隔壁鄰居的小孩的
587
00:36:11,467 --> 00:36:12,558
那一條狗!
588
00:36:36,833 --> 00:36:38,526
天外飛僊的眼睛怎麼那麼大呀?
589
00:36:38,566 --> 00:36:40,088
這樣是不是看得清楚一點呀?
590
00:36:40,132 --> 00:36:42,030
他的翅膀呢?沒有翅膀怎麼飛呀?
591
00:36:42,065 --> 00:36:43,156
長得真奇怪呀!
592
00:36:43,199 --> 00:36:45,165
不會吧,跟我長得差不多嘛
593
00:36:45,199 --> 00:36:47,324
對!跟你一樣醜
594
00:36:47,366 --> 00:36:48,389
你幹嘛?
595
00:36:49,532 --> 00:36:50,896
我在檢查他的性別
596
00:36:51,099 --> 00:36:52,462
應該是個女的
597
00:36:52,598 --> 00:36:53,655
他本來就是女的
598
00:36:53,698 --> 00:36:55,459
我還知道她身懷六甲哩
599
00:36:55,965 --> 00:36:56,828
你幹什麼?
600
00:36:56,865 --> 00:36:59,024
我看看他是男的還是女的
601
00:36:59,065 --> 00:37:01,758
你不懂就不要在這裏瞎攪和了
602
00:37:01,799 --> 00:37:03,389
這裏有沒有婦科大夫呀?
603
00:37:03,431 --> 00:37:04,658
就是他羅
604
00:37:15,731 --> 00:37:18,458
動手呀,快點動手呀
605
00:37:18,497 --> 00:37:20,157
不如開點藥給她吃好嗎?
606
00:37:24,364 --> 00:37:25,352
你會不會解剖呀?
607
00:37:25,397 --> 00:37:26,454
我會呀
608
00:37:26,497 --> 00:37:27,861
快點拿這把刀動手呀
609
00:37:27,897 --> 00:37:29,761
動手就動手,怕你呀?
610
00:37:29,830 --> 00:37:31,853
不過,可不可用這一把呀?
611
00:37:37,663 --> 00:37:39,027
先不要動手呀
612
00:37:40,097 --> 00:37:41,323
你會不會解剖呀?
613
00:37:41,363 --> 00:37:44,057
從喉嚨一刀下去,先放血才對嘛
614
00:37:44,097 --> 00:37:46,063
還用你說?我早知道了
615
00:37:48,062 --> 00:37:49,119
你來吧
616
00:37:49,163 --> 00:37:50,595
其實我不是大夫
617
00:37:50,630 --> 00:37:51,687
我是殺豬的
618
00:37:51,896 --> 00:37:53,862
你這個膽小鬼,不要找藉口
619
00:37:53,896 --> 00:37:54,759
來,讓我來
620
00:38:35,261 --> 00:38:36,693
這麼久,你搞定了沒有?
621
00:38:37,094 --> 00:38:38,617
你問得好,剛剛搞定
622
00:38:45,894 --> 00:38:46,360
等一等
623
00:38:46,860 --> 00:38:48,258
幹嘛?
624
00:38:59,527 --> 00:39:01,152
皇上的聲音?
625
00:39:03,859 --> 00:39:06,121
皇上,我就猜到是你了
626
00:39:06,226 --> 00:39:07,851
是誰砍我?
627
00:39:07,893 --> 00:39:09,052
有人砍你呀?
628
00:39:09,093 --> 00:39:10,718
就是他!
629
00:39:10,759 --> 00:39:12,089
可是那把刀是他的
630
00:39:12,126 --> 00:39:13,455
又是你這個混蛋!
631
00:39:13,492 --> 00:39:15,549
我要回砍你兩刀
632
00:39:17,225 --> 00:39:18,657
怎麼會這樣子?
633
00:39:19,292 --> 00:39:20,588
你們拿刀幹什麼?
634
00:39:20,626 --> 00:39:22,148
冷靜!
635
00:39:22,726 --> 00:39:23,918
果然有陰謀!
636
00:39:23,958 --> 00:39:25,049
陰謀?!
637
00:39:25,292 --> 00:39:26,121
皇上
638
00:39:26,726 --> 00:39:29,283
今日就讓我靈靈發來保護你
639
00:39:37,591 --> 00:39:39,217
連我的刀都吸走,這麼厲害呀?
640
00:39:39,258 --> 00:39:40,281
來,一個人一把保護自己
641
00:39:40,324 --> 00:39:41,347
皇上,你先吧
642
00:39:43,025 --> 00:39:43,752
你們等一等!
643
00:39:55,291 --> 00:39:57,018
不要小看我們大夫
644
00:39:57,057 --> 00:40:00,046
我們也是拿刀混飯吃的
就是了
645
00:40:01,557 --> 00:40:03,648
不要太生氣,先喝點水
646
00:40:03,690 --> 00:40:04,713
裏面全死了
647
00:40:08,056 --> 00:40:09,147
何方妖怪?
648
00:40:10,824 --> 00:40:12,585
領教我老邪刀法
649
00:40:21,056 --> 00:40:23,419
我跟你拼了!給我吧
650
00:40:23,456 --> 00:40:24,513
這把刀是我的!
651
00:40:34,856 --> 00:40:35,912
一人砍一邊 好
652
00:41:32,887 --> 00:41:33,818
這麼厲害呀
653
00:41:36,220 --> 00:41:37,117
住手
654
00:41:40,453 --> 00:41:41,646
你有沒有搞錯呀?
655
00:41:41,686 --> 00:41:43,413
怎麼每一次打到的都是我?
656
00:41:43,653 --> 00:41:44,516
大哥
657
00:41:45,219 --> 00:41:47,980
你那雙大腳在下面全穿梆了
658
00:41:48,019 --> 00:41:49,848
真以為我是笨蛋呀?
659
00:41:53,052 --> 00:41:55,075
快…
660
00:42:19,651 --> 00:42:20,674
我頂!
661
00:42:26,918 --> 00:42:28,941
我知道,同性相拒!
662
00:42:35,484 --> 00:42:36,609
阿發,你怎麼樣?
663
00:42:36,884 --> 00:42:41,044
怎麼樣?這個磁石呀真的是很了不起
664
00:42:49,517 --> 00:42:50,244
慘了!
665
00:42:50,283 --> 00:42:51,442
異性相吸呀
666
00:43:19,649 --> 00:43:20,512
有沒有搞錯呀?
667
00:44:00,202 --> 00:44:02,293
Yeah!
668
00:44:05,935 --> 00:44:07,424
阿發,你小子有一套呀
669
00:44:07,468 --> 00:44:09,626
多謝皇上,我們還是快走吧
670
00:44:09,668 --> 00:44:10,656
好,起駕
671
00:44:10,701 --> 00:44:11,564
走啦!
672
00:44:23,367 --> 00:44:25,162
老婆
673
00:44:28,534 --> 00:44:29,431
你老婆也來了嗎?
674
00:44:29,467 --> 00:44:30,490
介紹我認識一下
675
00:44:30,600 --> 00:44:32,328
先回去!這裏很危險
676
00:44:49,833 --> 00:44:51,731
怎麼還有一個活著?
677
00:44:51,766 --> 00:44:53,062
難道兒子在裏面有意外?
678
00:44:53,533 --> 00:44:54,725
我老婆呢?
679
00:44:54,799 --> 00:44:56,594
滿地都是呀!你自己找吧
680
00:44:56,766 --> 00:44:58,096
不要說那麼多,殺死他
681
00:45:14,332 --> 00:45:15,559
你躲到那裏都得死!
682
00:45:50,964 --> 00:45:51,827
殺死他
683
00:46:13,963 --> 00:46:15,189
怎麼這麼誇張!
684
00:46:31,829 --> 00:46:33,125
有沒有搞錯?
685
00:47:23,793 --> 00:47:24,554
老公
686
00:47:25,459 --> 00:47:26,254
老公
687
00:47:28,459 --> 00:47:29,947
怎麼會一模一樣的衣服?
688
00:47:31,493 --> 00:47:32,083
老婆
689
00:47:34,026 --> 00:47:34,617
老公
690
00:47:41,659 --> 00:47:42,647
你跑到哪裏去了?
691
00:47:43,458 --> 00:47:45,549
老公,我剛才碰到隔壁村的姐姐
692
00:47:45,592 --> 00:47:48,353
她說隔壁村大減價
於是帶我去搶購嘛
693
00:47:49,092 --> 00:47:50,058
你在這幹嘛?
694
00:47:50,292 --> 00:47:51,952
我在…找你呀
695
00:47:52,559 --> 00:47:54,184
這裏好像失火似的
696
00:47:54,225 --> 00:47:55,918
剛剛在這烤東西吃呀
697
00:47:56,659 --> 00:47:57,386
烤東西吃?
698
00:47:57,425 --> 00:47:58,550
烤雞翅膀啊
699
00:47:58,592 --> 00:48:00,558
那些人怎麼全都躺在地上?
700
00:48:00,991 --> 00:48:03,321
吃飽了嘛,躺一下很正常呀
701
00:48:04,225 --> 00:48:05,781
你又是怎麼搞的?吃得狼狽!
702
00:48:05,825 --> 00:48:07,291
衣服還弄到破破爛爛的
703
00:48:07,325 --> 00:48:08,347
到底怎麼回事呀?
704
00:48:08,558 --> 00:48:10,649
剛剛全村的人烤一隻雞翅膀
705
00:48:10,691 --> 00:48:12,680
我搶得太厲害就搞成這樣了
706
00:48:13,090 --> 00:48:15,147
你以為我是傻瓜?
707
00:48:21,357 --> 00:48:22,414
他…
708
00:48:22,658 --> 00:48:23,419
老婆
709
00:48:24,824 --> 00:48:29,314
你…
710
00:48:30,623 --> 00:48:32,089
你這皮衣那兒買的?
711
00:48:33,623 --> 00:48:34,384
這件?
712
00:48:35,290 --> 00:48:37,256
這件你喜歡,你拿去穿吧
713
00:48:37,290 --> 00:48:39,256
我不是喜歡你這件皮衣
714
00:48:39,290 --> 00:48:40,551
也不是想佔你的便宜
715
00:48:40,590 --> 00:48:43,283
如果我想要你這件皮衣的話
我就會叫我老公買給我
716
00:48:43,323 --> 00:48:44,811
我老公很有錢呀
717
00:48:44,856 --> 00:48:47,617
我是想告訴你這件衣服跟你根本不配
718
00:48:47,656 --> 00:48:49,350
光是顏色就不適合
719
00:48:49,390 --> 00:48:53,981
如果你的肚子這麼大的話
就不要穿這些衣服嘛
720
00:48:55,056 --> 00:48:59,147
我們可以到隔壁村去看看呀
721
00:48:59,189 --> 00:49:02,587
走吧,走…去隔壁村看看
722
00:49:09,721 --> 00:49:10,778
我老婆!
723
00:49:13,988 --> 00:49:15,215
很有內涵
724
00:49:16,255 --> 00:49:18,311
是啊!她是很好
725
00:49:21,188 --> 00:49:22,313
發哥
726
00:49:32,887 --> 00:49:34,876
來…
727
00:49:42,620 --> 00:49:43,984
來…
728
00:50:09,319 --> 00:50:11,945
老公,你從今天早上回來笑到現在
729
00:50:11,986 --> 00:50:14,713
有什麼事情這麼好笑的?
730
00:50:15,586 --> 00:50:19,074
早上看到一個肥婆掉進水渠裏
731
00:50:19,352 --> 00:50:23,579
肥婆掉進水渠裏有什麼好笑的?
732
00:50:23,718 --> 00:50:25,241
肥婆!
733
00:50:26,752 --> 00:50:28,241
水渠啊
734
00:50:32,285 --> 00:50:33,148
老婆
735
00:50:33,852 --> 00:50:35,283
這麼久以來…
736
00:50:35,885 --> 00:50:36,612
你聽我說
737
00:50:36,652 --> 00:50:37,447
說吧
738
00:50:37,918 --> 00:50:39,941
三餐都是粗茶淡飯
739
00:50:40,884 --> 00:50:42,248
你會不會介意啊?
740
00:50:42,318 --> 00:50:43,443
看你啦!
741
00:50:43,518 --> 00:50:45,847
如果你一天不介意吃我煮的菜
742
00:50:45,884 --> 00:50:47,350
我也無所謂了
743
00:50:48,418 --> 00:50:50,008
這麼久以來…
744
00:50:50,517 --> 00:50:54,143
我除了有一些偉大曠世的
發明送給你之外
745
00:50:54,185 --> 00:50:55,810
連一顆寶石都沒送給你
746
00:50:55,851 --> 00:50:56,908
你沒有意見吧?
747
00:50:56,951 --> 00:50:58,008
我有意見!
748
00:50:58,050 --> 00:51:00,039
那個什麼掃帚拖鞋
749
00:51:00,083 --> 00:51:02,379
搞得我要用兩隻腳掃地
750
00:51:02,417 --> 00:51:03,905
白白空出兩隻手來
751
00:51:03,950 --> 00:51:05,541
結果一隻手要擦窗戶
752
00:51:05,584 --> 00:51:07,277
另外一隻手還要洗衣服
753
00:51:07,317 --> 00:51:08,976
不知道有多麻煩呀
754
00:51:09,017 --> 00:51:10,381
你終於發覺了!
755
00:51:10,417 --> 00:51:11,314
對呀!對呀!
756
00:51:11,350 --> 00:51:13,907
還有呀,你那台爛抽油煙機呀
757
00:51:13,950 --> 00:51:14,813
怎麼樣?
758
00:51:14,850 --> 00:51:17,975
我實在懶得跟你講,我講起都生氣!
759
00:51:18,017 --> 00:51:18,948
應該的
760
00:51:18,983 --> 00:51:20,972
你呀,到底藏了什麼寶石?
761
00:51:21,017 --> 00:51:22,710
趕快拿出來給我看
762
00:51:38,982 --> 00:51:39,879
老婆
763
00:51:44,549 --> 00:51:45,378
你怎麼了?
764
00:51:49,715 --> 00:51:51,647
你是不是搶劫了?
765
00:51:53,115 --> 00:51:55,274
我…我沒有搶劫呀
766
00:51:55,581 --> 00:51:57,774
因為我醫好了一個很有錢的病人
767
00:51:57,815 --> 00:51:59,213
他拿了很多醫藥費給我
768
00:51:59,248 --> 00:52:00,975
我買來送給你的
769
00:52:17,947 --> 00:52:18,844
老婆!
770
00:52:18,880 --> 00:52:21,278
你不要過來,你不要管我
771
00:52:21,314 --> 00:52:22,405
你沒事吧?
772
00:52:22,547 --> 00:52:25,308
我一時太開心了,不能夠控制自己
773
00:52:27,713 --> 00:52:29,009
好漂亮呀
774
00:52:30,014 --> 00:52:31,206
我愛你,老公
775
00:52:34,380 --> 00:52:35,311
我也愛你
776
00:52:36,146 --> 00:52:37,112
一生一世
777
00:52:45,546 --> 00:52:48,637
阿發,我聽說城裏面
最大的一間妓院慧賢雅敘
778
00:52:48,679 --> 00:52:51,611
新來了一位金國美女,叫做琴操
779
00:52:51,712 --> 00:52:54,872
又琴又操
光聽這個名字就讓人流鼻血了
780
00:52:54,913 --> 00:52:56,344
你盡快去查查她的底
781
00:52:56,379 --> 00:52:58,607
如果沒有問題,就帶她來給我
782
00:52:59,145 --> 00:53:00,236
不會吧,皇上?
783
00:53:00,279 --> 00:53:02,767
這次怎麼派這麼好的任務給我?
784
00:53:03,345 --> 00:53:05,106
你是我的親信嘛
785
00:53:05,479 --> 00:53:08,501
而且,人人都知道你又專一又疼老婆
786
00:53:08,545 --> 00:53:10,102
絕不會搶我的女人
787
00:53:10,378 --> 00:53:11,901
這個任務非你莫屬了
788
00:53:12,212 --> 00:53:13,507
請恕微臣直言
789
00:53:14,244 --> 00:53:16,904
皇上已經有後宮佳麗三千
790
00:53:17,611 --> 00:53:20,099
為什麼還要出去偷吃呢?
791
00:53:32,477 --> 00:53:35,239
皇上你…
後宮佳麗到!
792
00:54:07,709 --> 00:54:08,800
你現在終於明白了?
793
00:54:12,075 --> 00:54:13,063
完全明白
794
00:54:14,242 --> 00:54:15,605
皇上,你再撐著點
795
00:54:16,276 --> 00:54:17,401
微臣…
796
00:54:18,542 --> 00:54:19,872
盡快為你搞定它
797
00:54:20,642 --> 00:54:22,301
他媽的,你兩個新來的嗎?
798
00:54:22,341 --> 00:54:25,069
慧賢雅敘是高級場所
你以為是低級妓院嗎?
799
00:54:25,208 --> 00:54:26,231
我們只招待會員
800
00:54:26,275 --> 00:54:28,138
回去帶夠錢再來入會
801
00:54:28,842 --> 00:54:31,467
豈有此理!我玩女人這麼多年了
802
00:54:31,508 --> 00:54:32,871
沒有像今天這麼沒面子
803
00:54:32,908 --> 00:54:34,965
老子帶人來砸這場子好不好?
804
00:54:35,808 --> 00:54:36,774
閉嘴
805
00:54:37,341 --> 00:54:57,003
豈有此理…豈有此理
806
00:54:57,507 --> 00:54:59,132
老鴇就是我呀
807
00:54:59,174 --> 00:55:01,140
老伯,聽說你想賣女兒
808
00:55:01,174 --> 00:55:02,140
先看看什麼貨色
809
00:55:03,073 --> 00:55:05,732
她可算得上是人間尤物呀
810
00:55:05,907 --> 00:55:06,930
你看
811
00:55:17,106 --> 00:55:18,402
怎麼樣呀?
812
00:55:18,840 --> 00:55:20,271
我很想打人
813
00:55:20,906 --> 00:55:23,031
能不能讓我狠狠的賞她幾記耳光呀?
814
00:55:23,672 --> 00:55:27,798
你不要那麼刻薄!出來撈的時候
也要給別人一點台階下呀
815
00:55:27,839 --> 00:55:30,896
你想打我幾耳光
我又何嘗不想用亂棍打你呢!
816
00:55:31,039 --> 00:55:33,800
你媽的頭,居然敢這樣跟我講話?
817
00:55:33,839 --> 00:55:36,862
我們這兒的姑娘,個個都是國色天香
818
00:55:37,006 --> 00:55:39,870
尤其是那幾個金國來的佳麗
819
00:55:39,906 --> 00:55:41,337
說了你都不相信
820
00:55:41,372 --> 00:55:45,065
大大的眼睛,高高的鼻子,小小的嘴
821
00:55:45,838 --> 00:55:47,304
叫她們出來比一比啊
822
00:55:47,438 --> 00:55:50,801
比什麼!人家連挖鼻孔的
樣子都比你美上一百遍!
823
00:55:50,838 --> 00:55:52,031
你們倆個趕快滾吧
824
00:55:52,071 --> 00:55:53,559
要不然我真的賞你幾耳光呀
825
00:55:53,604 --> 00:55:54,695
出來了
826
00:55:54,738 --> 00:55:56,966
金國佳麗出場了
827
00:56:48,936 --> 00:56:49,697
小姐
828
00:56:50,836 --> 00:56:52,392
賞面跳舞嗎?
829
00:57:48,533 --> 00:57:49,829
幹嘛?
830
00:57:49,866 --> 00:57:53,457
你站在那兒既不動也不吭聲
831
00:57:53,499 --> 00:57:57,431
你是不會跳舞呢還是不會說話呀?
832
00:57:58,599 --> 00:57:59,496
我不認識你
833
00:58:01,032 --> 00:58:04,294
我姓琴,單名一個操!
834
00:58:09,832 --> 00:58:11,627
阿發,好多女人呀
835
00:58:12,299 --> 00:58:14,628
阿發…阿發
836
00:58:27,832 --> 00:58:29,058
老婆!
837
00:58:29,398 --> 00:58:31,261
老公,你回來啦?
838
00:58:35,798 --> 00:58:38,787
老公呀,我做了一件
衣服準備生日那天來穿的
839
00:58:38,831 --> 00:58:39,762
你看漂不漂亮?
840
00:58:40,397 --> 00:58:42,795
紅紅綠綠的,好花俏啊
841
00:58:44,697 --> 00:58:48,629
那天我還請了爹娘跟
親戚朋友一起來吃飯
842
00:58:48,664 --> 00:58:50,687
你呀,要記得早點回來
843
00:58:52,863 --> 00:58:54,523
記不記得?
844
00:59:03,730 --> 00:59:07,355
老公,怎麼你的身上會有香味呀?
845
00:59:08,596 --> 00:59:11,892
你的鼻子還真靈
我特地買了胭脂水粉送你
846
00:59:12,329 --> 00:59:14,659
你為什麼要買胭脂水粉送給我呢?
847
00:59:14,696 --> 00:59:15,956
你生日嘛
848
00:59:16,663 --> 00:59:17,753
好乖!
849
00:59:18,329 --> 00:59:19,226
你快點去洗澡吧
850
00:59:19,263 --> 00:59:20,320
好呀!一起洗
851
00:59:20,595 --> 00:59:22,459
我洗過了,死鬼,你快點去洗澡吧
852
00:59:22,496 --> 00:59:25,393
再洗一次會死呀?
你快點去洗澡呀
853
00:59:45,895 --> 00:59:49,657
老鴇就是我
歡迎閣下成為慧賢雅敘的新會員
854
00:59:52,128 --> 00:59:53,116
看到閣下的樣子
855
00:59:53,162 --> 00:59:57,685
我硬是有一點不知道是什麼十分的
心裏面又…
856
00:59:57,728 --> 01:00:00,853
感覺到有一些神奇的那種…
857
01:00:00,894 --> 01:00:03,360
當然就是想狠狠打幾個耳光的那種呀
858
01:00:06,394 --> 01:00:07,553
是了…
859
01:00:07,693 --> 01:00:09,182
是了…
860
01:00:09,227 --> 01:00:09,920
是了!
861
01:00:10,261 --> 01:00:11,249
對了!
862
01:00:11,994 --> 01:00:13,482
你這裏是不是有一位琴操姑娘?
863
01:00:13,760 --> 01:00:14,691
有!有
864
01:00:14,860 --> 01:00:15,826
我想馬上見她
865
01:00:15,894 --> 01:00:17,189
你想見琴操姑娘?
866
01:00:17,627 --> 01:00:20,354
這裏所有人都要見琴操姑娘呀
867
01:00:20,693 --> 01:00:25,318
排隊啦!別以為自己英俊
又有才華就可以不用排隊了
868
01:00:25,493 --> 01:00:26,550
有才華都讓你看得出來?
869
01:00:26,593 --> 01:00:28,354
我還看得出你很真誠
870
01:00:28,393 --> 01:00:29,983
又有愛心
871
01:00:30,026 --> 01:00:31,117
當朋友真是一流
872
01:00:31,326 --> 01:00:32,655
糟了!居然讓你看出來
873
01:00:32,692 --> 01:00:33,885
那我一會要請吃飯了!
874
01:00:34,126 --> 01:00:35,455
當然要啦!
875
01:00:35,492 --> 01:00:36,822
排隊啦!
876
01:00:37,492 --> 01:00:38,822
臭小子!
877
01:01:02,125 --> 01:01:03,454
琴操姑娘!…我等了你好久了
878
01:01:03,491 --> 01:01:07,253
大家冷靜一點!…
879
01:01:07,291 --> 01:01:10,018
琴操姑娘說想請大家喝一杯酒
880
01:01:10,057 --> 01:01:12,023
先到那邊去拿個杯子
881
01:01:14,658 --> 01:01:15,953
我要一杯
882
01:01:19,291 --> 01:01:21,848
琴操姑娘!我們先飲為敬
883
01:01:23,224 --> 01:01:27,451
很難喝…什麼來的?
884
01:01:27,490 --> 01:01:28,387
好酒!
885
01:01:30,557 --> 01:01:34,489
所謂葡萄美酒夜光杯
欲飲琵琶馬上摧
886
01:01:34,990 --> 01:01:39,684
這杯葡萄酒,芳香醇厚
應該有一百多年的歷史
887
01:01:39,723 --> 01:01:42,780
相信是西域上貢給周王的貢品
888
01:01:43,157 --> 01:01:44,214
真的那麼有價值?
889
01:01:44,257 --> 01:01:45,552
太誇大其詞了吧,兄弟?
890
01:01:45,890 --> 01:01:47,220
你完全錯了!
891
01:01:47,257 --> 01:01:48,916
你骨碌一聲就吞下去了
892
01:01:48,956 --> 01:01:50,115
別說是酒呀
893
01:01:50,157 --> 01:01:52,020
尿你也分不出是甜的咸的
894
01:01:52,056 --> 01:01:55,385
飲酒有如美人,要喝得其法
895
01:01:56,422 --> 01:01:58,149
那一位把舌頭借我用一用?
896
01:01:58,889 --> 01:02:00,048
有沒有長一點的?
897
01:02:01,089 --> 01:02:02,055
對了
898
01:02:02,656 --> 01:02:05,712
我們的味蕾分佈在舌頭的表面
899
01:02:05,755 --> 01:02:07,221
下面就沒有了
900
01:02:07,256 --> 01:02:09,744
甜的味蕾呢是分佈在舌尖
901
01:02:09,789 --> 01:02:13,243
苦的味蕾呢,就在喉嚨的附近
902
01:02:13,789 --> 01:02:14,846
不要插太深
903
01:02:14,889 --> 01:02:16,514
好好,我弄前面一點
904
01:02:16,789 --> 01:02:19,687
酸的味蕾就分佈在舌頭的兩側
905
01:02:19,722 --> 01:02:21,153
所以我們品嚐美酒的時候
906
01:02:21,188 --> 01:02:23,279
要把舌頭捲成一圈
907
01:02:25,588 --> 01:02:27,383
你差得遠了,有得練了!
908
01:02:30,088 --> 01:02:32,553
這樣就可以避開兩邊酸的味蕾
909
01:02:32,587 --> 01:02:36,179
而讓酒在甜跟苦的味蕾之間徘徊
910
01:02:36,221 --> 01:02:39,209
先甜後苦,亦苦亦甜
911
01:02:40,420 --> 01:02:41,943
就好像…
912
01:02:44,220 --> 01:02:46,118
初戀的感覺一樣
913
01:02:56,987 --> 01:03:00,544
恭喜…琴操姑娘請你到花廳一聚
914
01:03:03,419 --> 01:03:04,942
琴操姑娘…
別急…
915
01:03:16,119 --> 01:03:18,516
公子何以…
916
01:03:18,619 --> 01:03:20,279
好像很不舒服似的?
917
01:03:20,319 --> 01:03:23,716
又坐立難安,莫非掛念家中嬌妻?
918
01:03:23,752 --> 01:03:27,684
姑娘…怎知我家中已有妻子?
919
01:03:28,352 --> 01:03:30,477
中原人士大多早婚
920
01:03:30,918 --> 01:03:32,782
我看公子成熟穩重
921
01:03:32,818 --> 01:03:34,182
想必成婚已久
922
01:03:34,818 --> 01:03:35,875
過獎了
923
01:03:36,118 --> 01:03:39,550
聽姑娘語氣,不像是中原人士
924
01:03:39,651 --> 01:03:41,140
我是金國人
925
01:03:41,185 --> 01:03:42,616
你不會有種族歧視吧?
926
01:03:42,785 --> 01:03:44,808
怎麼會呢?別傻了…
927
01:03:46,484 --> 01:03:48,110
姑娘你好像
928
01:03:48,251 --> 01:03:49,342
胖了又瘦了
929
01:03:50,284 --> 01:03:51,716
你好悶呀
930
01:03:51,751 --> 01:03:52,774
給我一點驚喜
931
01:03:52,950 --> 01:03:54,177
姑娘想要驚喜嗎?
932
01:03:54,551 --> 01:03:55,278
你有沒有呀?
933
01:03:55,584 --> 01:03:57,072
不要太小看我
934
01:03:57,384 --> 01:03:57,974
拿出來
935
01:03:58,251 --> 01:03:59,978
真的要我拿出來?
936
01:04:00,251 --> 01:04:00,773
拿呀
937
01:04:03,683 --> 01:04:04,478
送給你
938
01:04:10,184 --> 01:04:11,513
很漂亮,謝謝
939
01:04:12,617 --> 01:04:14,082
姑娘果然不同凡響
940
01:04:14,483 --> 01:04:16,540
尋常女子如果見到這顆夜明珠
941
01:04:16,583 --> 01:04:17,844
輕則驚呼狂叫
942
01:04:17,883 --> 01:04:19,349
重則吐血身亡
943
01:04:19,383 --> 01:04:22,645
姑娘視珠寶錢財如糞土
這份情操,真是…
944
01:04:22,916 --> 01:04:24,439
驚天地泣鬼神
945
01:04:35,083 --> 01:04:37,742
公子今晚是否有時間留下
946
01:04:37,783 --> 01:04:39,339
促膝長談呀?
947
01:04:40,649 --> 01:04:43,114
家中已經燒好了飯菜,不太方便!
948
01:04:43,415 --> 01:04:44,880
不方便你又來?
949
01:04:46,681 --> 01:04:51,239
如此良辰美景,貓兒也動情
950
01:04:51,948 --> 01:04:54,176
你曉不曉得那隻貓在說什麼?
951
01:04:54,782 --> 01:04:55,907
那隻貓說:
952
01:04:56,548 --> 01:04:58,377
別搞了,媽媽會罵!
953
01:05:07,114 --> 01:05:09,739
姑娘為何要這樣作賤自己呀?
954
01:05:12,680 --> 01:05:15,374
不作賤又怎麼會痛快呢?
955
01:05:15,647 --> 01:05:16,544
這麼神奇
956
01:05:17,014 --> 01:05:20,446
還有很多神奇的,公子一定沒試過
957
01:05:21,180 --> 01:05:23,044
如果今晚你留下
958
01:05:23,081 --> 01:05:26,274
小女子一定施展渾身解數
959
01:05:26,547 --> 01:05:29,035
保證公子大開眼界
960
01:05:38,213 --> 01:05:38,735
我不能這麼做
961
01:05:38,780 --> 01:05:40,871
我已經有老婆,我愛我老婆
962
01:05:40,913 --> 01:05:43,310
雖然我想,但是我要控制自己
963
01:05:43,479 --> 01:05:44,604
死就死吧,誰怕誰呀?
964
01:05:44,646 --> 01:05:46,111
來…
965
01:05:48,179 --> 01:05:51,612
正所謂易求無價寶,難得有情郎
966
01:05:51,646 --> 01:05:53,635
公子既然心中只有嬌妻
967
01:05:53,679 --> 01:05:54,974
我也不必勉強
968
01:05:55,012 --> 01:05:55,841
送客!
969
01:05:55,879 --> 01:05:56,607
是
970
01:05:57,146 --> 01:05:58,771
等… 公子請回
971
01:05:58,812 --> 01:06:00,539
不是,我剛剛想通了
972
01:06:00,578 --> 01:06:01,601
公子請回
973
01:06:01,645 --> 01:06:03,168
真是冤枉,褲子也脫了一半了
974
01:06:03,212 --> 01:06:04,109
給個機會嘛
975
01:06:04,146 --> 01:06:05,338
算了吧!公子
976
01:06:06,578 --> 01:06:08,840
琴操姑娘
977
01:06:26,511 --> 01:06:30,705
乾杯…
978
01:06:32,377 --> 01:06:33,809
好酒…
979
01:06:34,677 --> 01:06:37,643
老公,你怎麼一整個
晚上都傻呼呼的?
980
01:06:38,577 --> 01:06:41,100
我從來沒有像現在這麼聰明呀
981
01:06:42,011 --> 01:06:43,943
你的碗裏沒有添飯
982
01:06:47,577 --> 01:06:51,737
老公,我發現那天晚上
你送給我的胭脂水粉
983
01:06:51,776 --> 01:06:54,833
跟你那天回來時候
身上的味道不一樣啊
984
01:06:55,243 --> 01:06:56,539
我沒告訴你嗎?
985
01:06:57,010 --> 01:06:59,669
那是用一種叫做神奇麝香做成的
986
01:06:59,709 --> 01:07:02,334
它的味道會隨著不同的時辰而轉變
987
01:07:02,376 --> 01:07:04,501
到了晚上,就會變成臭臭的
988
01:07:05,843 --> 01:07:08,172
沒有呀,沒有臭臭的
989
01:07:09,142 --> 01:07:09,938
臭氣撲鼻了
990
01:07:11,042 --> 01:07:14,940
還有呀
那天你送我那顆特大號的珍珠
991
01:07:14,975 --> 01:07:16,907
我本來想今天晚上拿出來揚一下
992
01:07:16,942 --> 01:07:18,840
可是我找來找去都找不到
993
01:07:18,875 --> 01:07:20,398
你知不知道放在哪兒呀?
994
01:07:20,808 --> 01:07:21,865
世事就是這樣
995
01:07:21,908 --> 01:07:23,272
你越是急於找一樣東西呢
996
01:07:23,309 --> 01:07:24,774
它就偏偏不讓你找到
997
01:07:24,808 --> 01:07:26,172
你聰明的話就根本別找
998
01:07:26,209 --> 01:07:28,107
它就會自己慢慢的出現了
999
01:07:29,308 --> 01:07:32,069
岳父,來,吃個雞屁股
1000
01:07:33,074 --> 01:07:34,131
我忽然想起來了
1001
01:07:34,174 --> 01:07:35,834
那天你去妓院幹什麼?
1002
01:07:35,941 --> 01:07:36,669
妓院?
1003
01:07:36,708 --> 01:07:37,537
妓院呀!
1004
01:07:37,575 --> 01:07:38,472
你說什麼?
1005
01:07:38,708 --> 01:07:42,935
我說我親眼看到他去妓院
1006
01:07:50,874 --> 01:07:51,635
你們聽我說
1007
01:07:51,674 --> 01:07:52,571
等一下
1008
01:07:56,107 --> 01:07:57,403
不要說謊話
1009
01:07:57,440 --> 01:07:58,928
我聽一下就知道了
1010
01:08:05,607 --> 01:08:08,198
雞也是女人,也會生病
1011
01:08:08,840 --> 01:08:13,295
我作為一個婦科聖手
到妓院去幫她們看病
1012
01:08:13,339 --> 01:08:16,499
天經地義呀
1013
01:08:16,840 --> 01:08:18,931
女兒,他的心跳有沒有加快?
1014
01:08:25,573 --> 01:08:26,334
沒有
1015
01:08:29,439 --> 01:08:31,371
還好
1016
01:08:31,639 --> 01:08:32,900
對不起呀老公
1017
01:08:37,372 --> 01:08:39,270
你不相信我你真是該死呀
1018
01:09:19,570 --> 01:09:21,729
好香呀老公,你聞到嗎?
1019
01:09:35,737 --> 01:09:37,498
這位姑娘請問找那一位?
1020
01:09:37,869 --> 01:09:39,062
我來買藥的
1021
01:09:39,370 --> 01:09:41,097
請問有沒有『當歸』呀?
1022
01:09:41,569 --> 01:09:44,195
你是不是真的這麼急呀!改天再來嘛
1023
01:09:44,802 --> 01:09:46,098
我有一個心愛的男人
1024
01:09:46,136 --> 01:09:47,499
他沒有來找我
1025
01:09:47,535 --> 01:09:50,093
我買『當歸』只不過求一個意頭
1026
01:09:50,136 --> 01:09:51,431
盼他當夜歸來
1027
01:09:54,269 --> 01:09:56,735
姑娘,我建議你買『獨活』
1028
01:09:57,402 --> 01:09:59,425
獨自生活,別再那麼多事了
1029
01:10:00,801 --> 01:10:04,733
你身上的味道好特別呀
好像似曾相識
1030
01:10:04,768 --> 01:10:08,825
是呀,我用的水粉叫奪魄勾魂
1031
01:10:08,868 --> 01:10:10,925
全省城只我一個有
1032
01:10:12,002 --> 01:10:15,195
聽說奪魄勾魂
可以迷盡天下男人,是嗎?
1033
01:10:20,835 --> 01:10:22,959
可惜沒辦法迷到我心愛的男人
1034
01:10:24,067 --> 01:10:25,794
無論我怎麼作賤自己
1035
01:10:25,834 --> 01:10:28,595
他還是丟下我,回來陪老婆吃飯
1036
01:10:29,368 --> 01:10:31,334
所以我專誠來見一見夫人
1037
01:10:36,634 --> 01:10:38,600
今天我女兒過生日
1038
01:10:38,634 --> 01:10:40,031
你不要來搗蛋呀
1039
01:10:42,200 --> 01:10:43,223
你現在見到了
1040
01:10:44,066 --> 01:10:45,225
好美呀
1041
01:10:46,100 --> 01:10:46,725
比你美
1042
01:10:48,033 --> 01:10:48,556
送客
1043
01:10:48,600 --> 01:10:49,463
夫人
1044
01:10:51,066 --> 01:10:52,622
原來今天是你的生日
1045
01:10:52,866 --> 01:10:54,264
我沒準備什麼
1046
01:10:54,400 --> 01:10:57,059
不如就將這個小玩意送給夫人
1047
01:11:08,798 --> 01:11:10,025
你有沒有搞錯?
1048
01:11:10,566 --> 01:11:14,657
沒錯!我已經說了你不想找它的時候
它就會自己出現了
1049
01:11:15,732 --> 01:11:18,255
開什麼玩笑?送給她?
1050
01:11:19,431 --> 01:11:22,226
你送給我的東西
我怎麼捨得送人呢?
1051
01:11:22,498 --> 01:11:24,987
你們兩個到底是什麼關係?
快點講清楚
1052
01:11:27,031 --> 01:11:30,361
看起來,已經很清楚了嘛
1053
01:11:30,765 --> 01:11:31,923
你這個混蛋!
1054
01:11:33,131 --> 01:11:35,154
你這樣對我女兒,你還算是人嗎?
1055
01:11:35,897 --> 01:11:37,090
這位老先生不要衝動呀
1056
01:11:37,131 --> 01:11:38,392
快把珍珠還給我
1057
01:11:38,731 --> 01:11:40,220
夫人,你不要衝動嘛
1058
01:11:44,164 --> 01:11:46,288
你這個狐貍精,我跟你拼了!
1059
01:11:50,130 --> 01:11:50,892
不要動 不要動
1060
01:11:51,831 --> 01:11:53,126
你戳她,我戳死你
1061
01:11:54,697 --> 01:11:55,957
你戳我,我戳他
1062
01:11:56,597 --> 01:11:57,857
不關我的事呀大姐
1063
01:11:58,197 --> 01:11:59,356
你們快阻止她
1064
01:12:03,097 --> 01:12:04,256
賤人!
1065
01:12:09,596 --> 01:12:10,721
把馬放下來
1066
01:12:11,363 --> 01:12:12,351
你說什麼,老公?
1067
01:12:13,162 --> 01:12:15,253
把馬放下來
1068
01:12:15,296 --> 01:12:17,558
你嚇到我的朋友了
1069
01:12:19,062 --> 01:12:20,221
你說謊話
1070
01:12:20,762 --> 01:12:22,353
你說過你會愛我一生一世
1071
01:12:22,762 --> 01:12:24,126
你也說謊呀
1072
01:12:24,162 --> 01:12:26,390
你說你屬兔,結果你屬虎
1073
01:12:26,662 --> 01:12:28,026
足足大我一歲
1074
01:12:29,662 --> 01:12:32,594
你說謊話,你說謊話
1075
01:12:32,929 --> 01:12:34,224
把馬放下來
1076
01:12:34,262 --> 01:12:35,319
別想趁我不注意丟過來
1077
01:12:35,362 --> 01:12:36,623
你以為我不知道你呀?
1078
01:12:44,462 --> 01:12:45,553
全部給我放下!
1079
01:12:47,961 --> 01:12:49,052
你沒事吧?
1080
01:12:49,095 --> 01:12:49,924
沒事
1081
01:12:49,961 --> 01:12:52,189
對不起,破壞你們的宴會
1082
01:12:52,694 --> 01:12:54,284
全因為我太想見你
1083
01:12:54,327 --> 01:12:56,157
我實在太任性了,告辭
1084
01:12:57,028 --> 01:12:58,186
我跟你一起走
1085
01:12:58,227 --> 01:13:00,250
這種鬼地方我留下來也沒意思
1086
01:13:00,294 --> 01:13:01,021
走!
1087
01:13:02,960 --> 01:13:04,119
老公
1088
01:13:07,294 --> 01:13:09,351
你肚子餓不餓?我煮碗麵給你吃
1089
01:13:19,426 --> 01:13:20,221
你等等
1090
01:13:28,892 --> 01:13:30,051
丟臉
1091
01:13:30,093 --> 01:13:32,718
不要生氣嘛,我們回到慧賢雅敘
1092
01:13:32,759 --> 01:13:33,816
我幫你那個
1093
01:13:33,859 --> 01:13:34,620
那個?
1094
01:13:34,659 --> 01:13:36,057
就是那個嘛
1095
01:13:37,626 --> 01:13:41,683
沒人性呀,你不是人!
1096
01:13:42,126 --> 01:13:43,352
老天爺呀
1097
01:14:14,057 --> 01:14:16,455
我們總算有情人終成眷屬了
1098
01:14:16,757 --> 01:14:20,246
就在今天閃電之夜
正是我們辦事之時
1099
01:14:20,824 --> 01:14:22,381
你的樣子好賤呀
1100
01:14:22,424 --> 01:14:24,083
更賤的你還沒見過哩
1101
01:14:24,124 --> 01:14:26,283
好!聽我說嘛
1102
01:14:26,324 --> 01:14:27,721
我有點內疚呀!
1103
01:14:27,757 --> 01:14:29,814
剛剛害得你老婆好傷心!
1104
01:14:29,857 --> 01:14:32,254
為了你,不要說是我老婆
命都可以不要
1105
01:14:32,290 --> 01:14:33,654
不可以亂講話
1106
01:14:34,423 --> 01:14:37,877
我真的不想騙你
其實我是皇上身邊的大內密探
1107
01:14:37,923 --> 01:14:41,481
人稱保龍一族
專門負責秘密保護皇上
1108
01:14:41,523 --> 01:14:44,045
我當初來這找你是皇上看上了你
1109
01:14:44,090 --> 01:14:45,454
叫我來摸清你的底細
1110
01:14:46,756 --> 01:14:49,881
皇上叫你來摸清我的底細
現在你摸我
1111
01:14:49,923 --> 01:14:51,411
豈不是犯了欺君之罪
1112
01:14:51,756 --> 01:14:53,278
為了要摸你有什麼辦法呢?
1113
01:14:53,756 --> 01:14:55,278
管他去死呀
1114
01:14:56,155 --> 01:14:57,416
靈靈發!
1115
01:15:04,322 --> 01:15:06,810
皇上,還好你及時趕到
1116
01:15:08,422 --> 01:15:10,546
他剛剛說的話你都聽到了?
1117
01:15:10,588 --> 01:15:11,213
你
1118
01:15:11,289 --> 01:15:13,652
如果不是琴操姑娘以密函通知皇上
1119
01:15:13,688 --> 01:15:17,984
也不知道靈靈發
你這個狗奴才跟皇上搶女人!
1120
01:15:18,188 --> 01:15:19,211
你…
1121
01:15:19,488 --> 01:15:23,318
為了讓這只禽獸露出他本來的面目
1122
01:15:23,355 --> 01:15:26,617
我不惜用清白之軀作賭注
1123
01:15:27,088 --> 01:15:30,486
皇上,如果你來遲半步
1124
01:15:30,954 --> 01:15:32,783
那麼我不曉得…
1125
01:15:33,321 --> 01:15:34,650
你…
1126
01:15:34,854 --> 01:15:38,581
靈靈發
你知不知道你犯了誅九族之罪
1127
01:15:38,721 --> 01:15:39,812
皇上,我…
1128
01:15:39,854 --> 01:15:40,649
抓住他
1129
01:15:53,087 --> 01:15:54,746
皇上,為何鎖住我?
1130
01:15:55,653 --> 01:15:59,142
你這招一石三鳥之計,真是天衣無縫
1131
01:15:59,320 --> 01:16:02,013
先要我家破人亡
1132
01:16:02,486 --> 01:16:05,350
再讓皇上誅我九族
1133
01:16:05,386 --> 01:16:08,648
順便捉住皇上,然後要脅朝廷
1134
01:16:08,686 --> 01:16:11,481
接著大軍南下
到時候佔領我們中原土地
1135
01:16:11,519 --> 01:16:12,848
就易如反掌
1136
01:16:12,885 --> 01:16:13,613
哮
1137
01:16:14,353 --> 01:16:15,148
可惜我送你一個
1138
01:16:15,186 --> 01:16:18,482
凡是女人見到就會
發狂的夜明珠給你的時候
1139
01:16:18,519 --> 01:16:21,007
你表現得非常冷靜,我就已經知道你
1140
01:16:21,052 --> 01:16:23,540
不是女人
1141
01:16:24,552 --> 01:16:26,609
普天之下,跟我有深仇大恨
1142
01:16:26,652 --> 01:16:28,208
又整容整得那麼美的
1143
01:16:28,252 --> 01:16:30,241
就只有一個沒臉的老傢伙
1144
01:16:30,685 --> 01:16:32,776
無相皇,你這個賤人
1145
01:16:32,819 --> 01:16:34,375
我最恨人家扮女人來騙我
1146
01:16:34,418 --> 01:16:35,883
尤其扮這麼美的美女來勾引我
1147
01:16:35,918 --> 01:16:37,646
還好我們發哥聰明
1148
01:16:37,685 --> 01:16:38,809
一早就把你給揭穿了
1149
01:16:39,118 --> 01:16:39,674
皇上
1150
01:16:40,485 --> 01:16:41,451
你千萬別信他
1151
01:16:41,485 --> 01:16:43,916
他為了佔有我不惜拋妻棄家
1152
01:16:43,951 --> 01:16:46,110
甚至在我的面前毒打他的老婆
1153
01:16:46,684 --> 01:16:47,650
他簡直不是人
1154
01:16:47,918 --> 01:16:49,508
為了引你入局
1155
01:16:49,551 --> 01:16:52,381
我們一家大小剛剛是在家裏演戲呀
1156
01:16:52,718 --> 01:16:54,377
各位觀眾
1157
01:16:54,417 --> 01:16:55,474
最佳女主角
1158
01:17:04,917 --> 01:17:06,076
在剛才的戲裏面
1159
01:17:06,117 --> 01:17:08,810
她充份表現出一個被
老公拋棄的妻子的那份…
1160
01:17:08,850 --> 01:17:10,611
唏噓跟坎坷
1161
01:17:10,883 --> 01:17:13,076
不論是在眼神
表情以至動作行為方面
1162
01:17:13,117 --> 01:17:15,776
她都能夠演得出絲絲入扣,入木三分
1163
01:17:16,216 --> 01:17:18,079
尤其最後摔掉那隻馬的動作
1164
01:17:18,116 --> 01:17:22,549
更加能夠表現出後現代主義
跟對這個社會的強烈控訴
1165
01:17:22,583 --> 01:17:24,139
我們再來看看她是如何摔斷那隻馬的
1166
01:17:24,183 --> 01:17:25,978
她摔了,她摔了!
1167
01:17:28,516 --> 01:17:29,913
發嫂,恭喜你了,恭喜
1168
01:17:29,949 --> 01:17:31,881
謝謝…
1169
01:17:33,449 --> 01:17:35,813
首先,我要謝謝我爹跟我娘
1170
01:17:35,849 --> 01:17:38,144
因為他們一直在我身邊支持我
1171
01:17:38,182 --> 01:17:40,648
另外我要謝謝我的老公
1172
01:17:40,682 --> 01:17:43,045
因為他給我這個機會讓我演這場戲
1173
01:17:43,082 --> 01:17:45,173
他很辛苦的跟我排練了好久
1174
01:17:45,215 --> 01:17:47,874
所以這個獎有一半是屬於你的
1175
01:17:47,915 --> 01:17:49,074
老公,謝謝你
1176
01:17:51,515 --> 01:17:54,639
好了,馬上頒發今晚的壓軸大獎
1177
01:17:54,681 --> 01:17:57,147
相信大家一定猜到,沒錯
1178
01:17:57,182 --> 01:17:59,773
最佳男主角就是
1179
01:17:59,815 --> 01:18:01,111
阿發的岳父!
1180
01:18:02,548 --> 01:18:04,377
太好了!
1181
01:18:09,880 --> 01:18:13,278
其實這個獎不是我拿還有誰拿呢?
1182
01:18:13,647 --> 01:18:15,613
我親眼看到他進妓院!
1183
01:18:16,614 --> 01:18:18,205
對不起,請等等
1184
01:18:18,248 --> 01:18:20,146
剛剛那場戲我從頭帶到尾
1185
01:18:20,181 --> 01:18:22,271
看上去是水準之作,有目共睹
1186
01:18:22,313 --> 01:18:23,279
你怎會把獎給那個人?
1187
01:18:23,313 --> 01:18:26,075
你也不錯,但是流於表面
1188
01:18:26,113 --> 01:18:28,602
就像剛剛你老婆聽你心跳那場戲
1189
01:18:28,647 --> 01:18:31,306
表情做足,略嫌浮誇
1190
01:18:31,347 --> 01:18:33,370
那些是世俗人對我的看法
1191
01:18:33,413 --> 01:18:35,106
你該不會也不識貨吧?
1192
01:18:35,146 --> 01:18:37,634
不對了,老公,我聽心跳的時候
1193
01:18:37,679 --> 01:18:40,271
真的感覺不到我跟你有交流
1194
01:18:40,313 --> 01:18:42,471
只覺得你好像完全沒有辦法入戲
1195
01:18:42,512 --> 01:18:43,944
你真的不是很會演戲呀
1196
01:18:43,980 --> 01:18:45,139
你…
1197
01:18:45,180 --> 01:18:46,805
聽我說句公道話
1198
01:18:46,846 --> 01:18:48,175
一句就好
1199
01:18:48,212 --> 01:18:50,144
你不懂演戲呀
1200
01:18:50,179 --> 01:18:52,805
閉嘴!現在琴操的身份未明
1201
01:18:52,846 --> 01:18:55,209
你們還有心情在這裏搞什麼頒獎典禮
1202
01:18:55,246 --> 01:18:56,041
根本是亂來的
1203
01:18:56,878 --> 01:18:58,242
皇上,我…
1204
01:18:58,279 --> 01:18:59,609
小心鼻毛呀!
1205
01:19:00,945 --> 01:19:04,400
我是一個願意為皇上上刀山的人
1206
01:19:04,446 --> 01:19:07,310
今日,就讓我用我的肉體
1207
01:19:07,345 --> 01:19:09,368
去檢驗琴操的真身
1208
01:19:11,578 --> 01:19:12,771
閃開
1209
01:19:16,044 --> 01:19:16,476
小心
1210
01:19:35,444 --> 01:19:37,672
靈靈發,你殺我妻兒
1211
01:19:37,711 --> 01:19:39,404
就算不能夠誅你九族
1212
01:19:39,444 --> 01:19:41,569
今日我也要你碎屍萬段
1213
01:19:41,611 --> 01:19:42,906
你們一個也不能走
1214
01:19:42,943 --> 01:19:43,806
保護皇上
1215
01:19:43,843 --> 01:19:45,639
佛印,把我那個百寶箱扔過來
1216
01:19:47,110 --> 01:19:49,667
百寶箱在此,接住
1217
01:19:54,409 --> 01:19:57,398
你幹嘛叫我把它丟給你呀?
1218
01:19:57,443 --> 01:19:58,409
這下玩完了!
1219
01:19:58,810 --> 01:20:00,207
那我對不起了!
1220
01:20:03,576 --> 01:20:04,542
不痛呀!
1221
01:20:07,042 --> 01:20:09,065
打中的沒事,隔壁的那個倒霉了
1222
01:20:09,176 --> 01:20:10,937
這就是無相神功
1223
01:20:10,976 --> 01:20:13,965
是一種可以將能量移轉的武功
1224
01:20:28,642 --> 01:20:29,801
兄弟,你沒事吧?
1225
01:20:29,975 --> 01:20:31,202
我好怕呀
1226
01:20:31,874 --> 01:20:33,431
不過我沒事
1227
01:20:33,475 --> 01:20:34,906
還舒服哩!
1228
01:20:35,008 --> 01:20:36,338
真是打中了都沒事呀
1229
01:20:36,375 --> 01:20:37,306
那我就不怕了
1230
01:20:37,342 --> 01:20:38,273
讓我來
1231
01:20:45,808 --> 01:20:48,433
兄弟,你不是說很舒服嗎?
1232
01:20:48,941 --> 01:20:50,531
真的很舒服嘛
1233
01:20:50,574 --> 01:20:51,562
算啦
1234
01:20:51,974 --> 01:20:53,997
你還是打那位兄弟吧
1235
01:20:59,140 --> 01:21:00,537
這也不是辦法
1236
01:21:01,673 --> 01:21:04,503
算了,麻煩你還是打我吧
1237
01:21:11,807 --> 01:21:13,204
世事難預料
1238
01:21:18,573 --> 01:21:23,732
無色無相,幻化萬象
無相無色,萬壽無疆
1239
01:21:23,772 --> 01:21:25,863
天下唯我獨尊
1240
01:21:43,072 --> 01:21:44,333
是誰?
1241
01:21:44,439 --> 01:21:45,530
好姐妹
1242
01:21:45,571 --> 01:21:46,764
全靠你啦!
1243
01:21:48,504 --> 01:21:50,561
移魂大法
1244
01:22:14,837 --> 01:22:16,064
頭暈!撐不住了
1245
01:22:17,804 --> 01:22:20,167
這種彫蟲小技,你想嚇唬誰呀?
1246
01:22:25,503 --> 01:22:27,628
你以為普通一條鐵鐵
就可以鎖住我嗎?
1247
01:22:28,570 --> 01:22:32,899
這條鐵鐵主要不是鎖住你
只用來連接屋頂上那個引雷燈
1248
01:22:32,936 --> 01:22:36,130
不是說打雷閃電之夜
就是我們辦事之時嗎?
1249
01:22:36,170 --> 01:22:38,499
今晚就賞你一個五雷轟頂
1250
01:22:42,736 --> 01:22:43,463
Yeah!
1251
01:22:43,502 --> 01:22:43,991
Yeah!
1252
01:22:44,036 --> 01:22:44,626
Yeah!
1253
01:22:44,703 --> 01:22:46,191
Yeah…
1254
01:23:57,233 --> 01:23:58,392
別動!
1255
01:24:20,232 --> 01:24:20,993
天
1256
01:24:23,031 --> 01:24:23,928
外
1257
01:24:25,931 --> 01:24:26,919
飛
1258
01:24:29,898 --> 01:24:30,625
僊
1259
01:25:59,628 --> 01:26:03,185
原來就是五雷轟頂打中了阿發
1260
01:26:03,228 --> 01:26:06,023
讓他身體裏面的細胞變大
1261
01:26:06,061 --> 01:26:09,027
功力等於武林高手苦練了一百年
1262
01:26:09,061 --> 01:26:12,084
所以阿發能夠使用天外飛僊
1263
01:26:12,393 --> 01:26:16,758
但是那個時候我好像
隱約見到個美女飛翔於天際
1264
01:26:16,794 --> 01:26:19,884
到底是氣流撞擊所產生的幻覺
1265
01:26:19,926 --> 01:26:22,085
還是我喝醉了呢?
1266
01:26:22,893 --> 01:26:24,223
當然是你喝醉了!
1267
01:26:24,893 --> 01:26:26,552
那你不是喝得更多?
1268
01:26:26,593 --> 01:26:28,116
我每天都喝醉
1269
01:26:29,093 --> 01:26:31,718
奇怪,阿發怎麼今天
這麼晚還沒來上班呢?
1270
01:26:32,126 --> 01:26:34,489
發哥,你在哪裏?
1271
01:26:35,060 --> 01:26:36,753
我們沒有你不行呀
1272
01:26:36,793 --> 01:26:37,884
發哥,回來吧
1273
01:26:39,159 --> 01:26:41,216
老公!好偉大呀
1274
01:26:41,259 --> 01:26:45,692
你這個發明拂拂拂拂拂
就可以垂直升降,任意飛翔
1275
01:26:45,726 --> 01:26:47,521
不如我們幫它取個名字叫做…
1276
01:26:47,559 --> 01:26:48,388
直升機呀?
1277
01:26:48,426 --> 01:26:50,289
不好…這個名字不夠威風呀!
1278
01:26:50,326 --> 01:26:51,451
不如叫做
1279
01:26:51,491 --> 01:26:53,616
拂拂拂拂拂拂機
1280
01:26:53,658 --> 01:26:54,555
好聰明呀老婆
1281
01:26:54,592 --> 01:26:57,115
對呀…不然怎麼做你老婆呢?
1282
01:26:57,258 --> 01:26:59,554
老公,我們再飛去看一看
1283
01:27:01,992 --> 01:27:04,651
好浪漫呀 對
1284
01:27:04,692 --> 01:27:07,885
我要幫你生一個兒子
1285
01:27:07,924 --> 01:27:09,822
真的嗎? 真的
1286
01:27:09,857 --> 01:27:12,618
好!我們馬上回家做
1287
01:27:12,724 --> 01:27:13,951
不行…我等不及了
1288
01:27:13,991 --> 01:27:16,014
不如我們就在這兒做!
1289
01:27:16,058 --> 01:27:18,649
不是吧 來吧!
86553