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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 3 00:00:11,479 --> 00:00:13,481 (* "Gotta Get Out Of Kansas") 4 00:00:16,650 --> 00:00:18,819 * Wind blowing through my hair 5 00:00:18,852 --> 00:00:23,091 * Everybody telling me there's nowhere like home 6 00:00:23,124 --> 00:00:24,392 * No, no 7 00:00:26,660 --> 00:00:28,796 * There's somewhere else for me 8 00:00:28,829 --> 00:00:33,201 * I need to take the opportunity and go 9 00:00:33,234 --> 00:00:36,270 * And go, yeah 10 00:00:36,304 --> 00:00:38,206 * 'Cause 'round here it's all too far 11 00:00:38,239 --> 00:00:40,508 * And when I look up to the stars 12 00:00:40,541 --> 00:00:43,811 * I wanna be, I wanna be like they are 13 00:00:43,844 --> 00:00:46,114 * Oh, oh, oh 14 00:00:46,147 --> 00:00:50,318 * Sometimes you gotta get out of Kansas 15 00:00:50,351 --> 00:00:54,288 * And sometimes you gotta take your chances 16 00:00:54,322 --> 00:00:55,856 * Find the answer 17 00:00:55,889 --> 00:00:57,858 * 'Cause no one ever made it just waiting around 18 00:00:57,891 --> 00:01:01,295 * For their big 15 minutes in a two-bit town 19 00:01:01,329 --> 00:01:04,398 * And one thing I know is crystal-clear 20 00:01:04,432 --> 00:01:06,700 * I gotta get out of here 21 00:01:10,904 --> 00:01:13,641 * A new sound, a whole new crowd 22 00:01:13,674 --> 00:01:17,278 * Why whisper, when I want to sing out loud? 23 00:01:17,311 --> 00:01:20,814 * And let me hear you say, "Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah" 24 00:01:20,848 --> 00:01:23,184 * I'm on land but I can fly 25 00:01:23,217 --> 00:01:27,388 * Something in my heart saying I was meant to shine 26 00:01:27,421 --> 00:01:30,624 * Like a diamond in the sky 27 00:01:30,658 --> 00:01:33,194 * I wanna see my name in lights 28 00:01:33,227 --> 00:01:35,163 * And someone to buy the movie rights 29 00:01:35,196 --> 00:01:38,499 * I wanna hear my music come to life 30 00:01:38,532 --> 00:01:40,501 * Oh 31 00:01:40,534 --> 00:01:44,672 * Sometimes you gotta get out of Kansas 32 00:01:44,705 --> 00:01:48,442 * And sometimes you gotta take your chances 33 00:01:48,476 --> 00:01:50,711 * Find the answer 34 00:01:50,744 --> 00:01:52,646 * 'Cause no one ever made it just waiting around 35 00:01:52,680 --> 00:01:55,383 * For their big 15 minutes in a two-bit town 36 00:01:55,416 --> 00:01:58,452 * And one thing I know is crystal-clear 37 00:01:58,486 --> 00:02:01,121 * I gotta get outta here 38 00:02:03,224 --> 00:02:06,560 * I gotta get outta here 39 00:02:06,594 --> 00:02:08,729 * Mm-mm 40 00:02:08,762 --> 00:02:11,399 * I gotta get out of here 41 00:02:13,601 --> 00:02:16,370 (woman) Dorothy. I gotta get out of here. 42 00:02:16,404 --> 00:02:20,241 Dorothy! Enough daydreaming, Dorothy. 43 00:02:20,274 --> 00:02:22,610 You know, these ketchup bottles ain't gonna refill themselves. 44 00:02:22,643 --> 00:02:26,414 Sorry, Aunt Em. I just can't stop thinking about my audition today. 45 00:02:26,447 --> 00:02:28,782 So, how do I look? 46 00:02:28,816 --> 00:02:30,584 You look like one of them girls in one of them rap videos. 47 00:02:30,618 --> 00:02:33,254 Order's up! 48 00:02:33,287 --> 00:02:36,424 Uncle Henry, what do you think of my outfit? 49 00:02:36,457 --> 00:02:40,294 You look like one of them girls in a rap video. 50 00:02:40,328 --> 00:02:43,831 But we cannot allow you to walk around the street dressed like that. 51 00:02:43,864 --> 00:02:46,400 Dorothy's old enough to dress the way she wants, don't you think? 52 00:02:46,434 --> 00:02:49,403 Now, Em, don't get mad. Baby? Uh-oh. 53 00:02:51,839 --> 00:02:54,242 There you go. It's three o'clock. 54 00:02:54,275 --> 00:02:57,378 I've gotta go to my audition. And this is what I'm wearing. 55 00:02:57,411 --> 00:02:59,313 What? You can't leave. 56 00:02:59,347 --> 00:03:02,483 Hey, Early. Hey! Hey, Em. 57 00:03:02,516 --> 00:03:04,485 I need you for the early-bird rush. 58 00:03:06,754 --> 00:03:09,923 I know I'm leaving you short-handed, Aunt Em, but this is big. 59 00:03:09,957 --> 00:03:13,527 I mean, if they like me, I could get out of Kansas and become somebody. 60 00:03:13,561 --> 00:03:16,497 If they like you? See, that's your problem. 61 00:03:16,530 --> 00:03:19,967 Look, now, you can roll out of here in one of those stretch Hummers 62 00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:21,902 and sing all around the world, 63 00:03:21,935 --> 00:03:23,971 but you never gonna get to where you wanna be 64 00:03:24,004 --> 00:03:26,006 until you're happy with who you are. 65 00:03:26,039 --> 00:03:28,942 What? You can go to your audition after your shift is over. 66 00:03:28,976 --> 00:03:31,645 But I'm already gonna be late! (Uncle Henry whispers) Psst, Dorothy. 67 00:03:31,679 --> 00:03:34,382 Over here. Come, come, come, come, come, come, come. 68 00:03:34,415 --> 00:03:37,285 Nice to see you, Glen. (Uncle Henry) So that's it? 69 00:03:37,318 --> 00:03:40,020 You're just gonna pass up an opportunity to audition for the Muppets, 70 00:03:40,053 --> 00:03:42,690 the most powerful puppets in Hollywood? 71 00:03:42,723 --> 00:03:45,393 (Dorothy) You heard the wise one: 72 00:03:45,426 --> 00:03:47,628 "You're not gonna where you're going till you're where you're at." 73 00:03:47,661 --> 00:03:50,564 Well, you've been a great employee at my diner for years now, 74 00:03:50,598 --> 00:03:53,567 and it's time I repaid the favor. So, go on to your audition. 75 00:03:53,601 --> 00:03:55,269 Thanks! Go on. 76 00:03:56,904 --> 00:03:59,039 Excuse me. Henry! Hey, baby. 77 00:03:59,072 --> 00:04:01,975 Henry! Remember what I said. Ten percent. 78 00:04:02,009 --> 00:04:04,412 I'm kidding. Henry! Where's she off to? 79 00:04:04,445 --> 00:04:06,380 Who? Who? 80 00:04:06,414 --> 00:04:07,915 I don't see anybody, I don't know who you're talking to. 81 00:04:07,948 --> 00:04:10,584 Hey, have you ever seen an African avocado? 82 00:04:10,618 --> 00:04:14,488 They're orange, but they taste just like peanut butter. 83 00:04:14,522 --> 00:04:17,425 What? Guess what we're having for dinner. A basketful of kisses, honey. 84 00:04:17,458 --> 00:04:21,562 Oh, man! Who put a gym shoe in the deep fryer? 85 00:04:29,937 --> 00:04:33,707 Sir? Sir, hi. I'm here for the audition. 86 00:04:33,741 --> 00:04:37,711 I'm afraid auditions ended at four, due to slim pickin's. 87 00:04:37,745 --> 00:04:40,348 Please, I'm only five minutes late. 88 00:04:40,381 --> 00:04:43,451 Oh, alas, I feel your pain. 89 00:04:43,484 --> 00:04:46,320 But the Muppets have gone and where they are now, 90 00:04:46,354 --> 00:04:49,957 heaven only knows. 91 00:04:49,990 --> 00:04:54,462 (Kermit) OK, guys, if you gotta go, go. Next stop, Nebraska. 92 00:04:54,495 --> 00:04:56,897 Who'd have thought it would be so hard to find an all-American girl with talent? 93 00:04:56,930 --> 00:05:00,634 Yeah, how do the producers of Girls Gone Wild do it? 94 00:05:00,668 --> 00:05:03,471 Mr. Kermit! Miss Piggy! 95 00:05:03,504 --> 00:05:06,073 Oh, great, a groupie. Sorry, dear, no autographs. 96 00:05:06,106 --> 00:05:08,542 Actually, I wanted to sing for you, 97 00:05:08,576 --> 00:05:10,978 but if it's too late, do you think maybe you can listen to my demo? 98 00:05:11,011 --> 00:05:12,746 Oh, I... No time. 99 00:05:12,780 --> 00:05:15,383 We'll have to get your song off Napster. No, no, Piggy. 100 00:05:15,416 --> 00:05:18,519 Sure, uh, gee... And you're a singer? 101 00:05:18,552 --> 00:05:20,554 Yeah. And you did this demo yourself? 102 00:05:20,588 --> 00:05:23,791 All by myself. Time to go! 103 00:05:23,824 --> 00:05:26,126 Well, listen, I will try to listen to your CD! 104 00:05:26,159 --> 00:05:29,029 OK, thanks for your time. 105 00:05:52,553 --> 00:05:54,422 Why are you doing that? 106 00:05:54,455 --> 00:05:56,690 I thought it would make the moment more dramatic. 107 00:05:56,724 --> 00:05:58,426 (tuts) 108 00:06:16,977 --> 00:06:18,479 (man over radio) It's not looking pretty out there tonight 109 00:06:18,512 --> 00:06:21,482 with strong gusts of wind up to 90 miles an hour 110 00:06:21,515 --> 00:06:23,016 through the Central Plain area. 111 00:06:23,050 --> 00:06:25,453 Don't forget the toilet paper. This just in. 112 00:06:25,486 --> 00:06:30,424 The National Weather Bureau has raised the twister alert from right-foot green, 113 00:06:30,458 --> 00:06:32,893 to right-foot yellow. Do you know what that means, folks? 114 00:06:32,926 --> 00:06:37,698 All you people in Boomville and Washedup should take extra precautions tonight... 115 00:06:37,731 --> 00:06:41,068 Baby, what took you so long? Did you miss your bus? 116 00:06:41,101 --> 00:06:43,737 You got what you wanted, I'm still stuck here. 117 00:06:46,874 --> 00:06:49,009 You need to talk to your niece. 118 00:06:49,042 --> 00:06:52,813 You need to talk to your niece. 119 00:06:52,846 --> 00:06:55,716 OK, I'll talk to her. I'm just packing the box. 120 00:07:04,658 --> 00:07:06,894 Toto, is this it for me? 121 00:07:06,927 --> 00:07:08,596 Serving meatloaf to truckers 122 00:07:08,629 --> 00:07:11,131 and living in a Kansas trailer park? 123 00:07:21,842 --> 00:07:24,044 Now, I know you think show business 124 00:07:24,077 --> 00:07:26,614 is all glitz and glamour, but it's not. 125 00:07:26,647 --> 00:07:29,082 Well, that is true. That is very, very true. 126 00:07:29,116 --> 00:07:32,085 Hollywood is full of crime and flash fires, 127 00:07:32,119 --> 00:07:34,087 earthquakes, paparazzi... 128 00:07:34,121 --> 00:07:35,889 (imitates camera shutter) 129 00:07:35,923 --> 00:07:38,592 You know, it's not safe. Not like here. (thunder) 130 00:07:42,195 --> 00:07:44,632 Look, I know you wanna leave, but you still belong here 131 00:07:44,665 --> 00:07:46,266 with your family and your friends. 132 00:07:46,299 --> 00:07:49,537 What friends? What friends? Come on. 133 00:07:49,570 --> 00:07:51,772 Toto's your friend, and um... 134 00:07:51,805 --> 00:07:54,842 uh, you got, uh... 135 00:07:54,875 --> 00:07:57,678 Toto's your friend. Toto's a prawn I rescued from the diner 136 00:07:57,711 --> 00:08:00,113 because you won't let me have a dog. 137 00:08:00,147 --> 00:08:02,115 Well, dogs are funky. 138 00:08:02,149 --> 00:08:05,252 And they got fleas, OK? 139 00:08:05,285 --> 00:08:08,956 Look, how about this? When this blows over, 140 00:08:08,989 --> 00:08:11,759 we will go to the Karaoke Bar and Buffet. 141 00:08:11,792 --> 00:08:14,562 Sing, girl! Don't you guys get it? 142 00:08:14,595 --> 00:08:17,698 I don't want to sing karaoke in some little Kansas restaurant. 143 00:08:17,731 --> 00:08:20,167 I want an exciting life. 144 00:08:20,200 --> 00:08:22,870 I want to go somewhere where I can see a concert, 145 00:08:22,903 --> 00:08:25,973 or take dance lessons, or maybe even learn kabbalah. 146 00:08:26,006 --> 00:08:28,809 Kabbalah? Did she blaspheme? I don't think so, baby. 147 00:08:28,842 --> 00:08:31,645 I wanna go somewhere where I can be someone. 148 00:08:33,581 --> 00:08:35,983 Maybe even a star. OK, now, 149 00:08:36,016 --> 00:08:38,686 do you wanna be a star or a singer? 150 00:08:38,719 --> 00:08:41,689 Because they're not the same thing. 151 00:08:41,722 --> 00:08:44,257 Well, all I know is that I hate living here and I don't want to end up like you. 152 00:08:44,291 --> 00:08:46,894 (warning siren) Uh-oh. 153 00:08:46,927 --> 00:08:48,896 Uh-oh. Well... 154 00:08:48,929 --> 00:08:52,132 Hey, did you know that in the Northern Hemisphere, 155 00:08:52,165 --> 00:08:54,167 hurricanes, they twist counterclockwise, 156 00:08:54,201 --> 00:08:56,870 but in the Southern Hemisphere they twist clockwise? 157 00:08:56,904 --> 00:08:59,172 I'd hate to be the guy that figured that out. 158 00:08:59,206 --> 00:09:00,808 With the wind just blowing everything... 159 00:09:03,276 --> 00:09:07,280 Well, that's the round. Back to your corners. 160 00:09:07,314 --> 00:09:13,186 I'm heading to the storm shelter before this tornado hits and we all die. 161 00:09:13,220 --> 00:09:16,323 Anybody care to join me? 162 00:09:16,356 --> 00:09:18,992 Great. Now I'm stuck with these two knuckleheads in the storm shelter. 163 00:09:25,265 --> 00:09:27,334 Dorothy, come on! 164 00:09:35,843 --> 00:09:39,079 Henry, come on! Come on, I'll help you. 165 00:09:39,112 --> 00:09:41,248 Come on, babe. 166 00:09:46,820 --> 00:09:50,257 Wait! I forgot Toto! No, it's just a shrimp! 167 00:09:50,290 --> 00:09:52,926 He's not a shrimp, he's a king prawn! 168 00:09:52,960 --> 00:09:54,728 Dorothy! 169 00:09:57,931 --> 00:09:59,299 Dorothy! 170 00:10:02,069 --> 00:10:03,771 (screams) 171 00:10:06,807 --> 00:10:09,176 Toto! Toto! 172 00:10:16,249 --> 00:10:18,952 (screams) Sorry, Toto! 173 00:10:20,888 --> 00:10:24,257 When I make it big, I'm gonna buy a nice brick house 174 00:10:24,291 --> 00:10:25,993 that's anchored to the ground. 175 00:10:53,186 --> 00:10:55,122 Ouch! 176 00:10:58,892 --> 00:11:01,294 Toto! 177 00:11:01,328 --> 00:11:04,932 Toto! Come on, Toto! Where are you? 178 00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:09,469 Toto! 179 00:11:09,502 --> 00:11:13,140 (Spanish accent) Hola! (both scream) 180 00:11:13,173 --> 00:11:15,375 ¿Por qué? What is it? Why do we scream, OK? 181 00:11:15,408 --> 00:11:18,378 You're all big. And you're talking. 182 00:11:18,411 --> 00:11:22,482 Sí. But more importantly, I am naked, OK. 183 00:11:22,515 --> 00:11:23,483 (laughs) 184 00:11:23,516 --> 00:11:25,919 Wait! No! Huh? What? 185 00:11:25,953 --> 00:11:29,189 Here. Oh, no, no, no. He's not my type, OK. 186 00:11:29,222 --> 00:11:31,358 The clothes. OK. Oh, the clothes. 187 00:11:31,391 --> 00:11:33,126 You want me to put on the clothes, 188 00:11:33,160 --> 00:11:34,494 you just have to say, "Put on the clothes." 189 00:11:34,527 --> 00:11:35,729 (thud) 190 00:11:35,763 --> 00:11:37,430 OK. (fabric ripping) 191 00:11:41,001 --> 00:11:43,470 Hmm. Oh, it's a nice fit, OK? 192 00:11:43,503 --> 00:11:45,372 Yeah, it's kind of cute. I like how... 193 00:11:45,405 --> 00:11:47,307 Sí, sí. 194 00:11:47,340 --> 00:11:49,509 What am I doing? Hmm? 195 00:11:49,542 --> 00:11:52,445 You can't be talking to me. Oh. Oh, but I am. 196 00:11:52,479 --> 00:11:55,115 I need some air. Sí, sí. 197 00:11:55,148 --> 00:11:58,185 I have this effect on all the womens, OK. I'll come with you. 198 00:12:01,054 --> 00:12:03,190 Little help, please. Come on, Toto. 199 00:12:04,925 --> 00:12:06,894 Gracias. 200 00:12:06,927 --> 00:12:09,396 There. 201 00:12:09,429 --> 00:12:11,431 (both gasp) 202 00:12:13,500 --> 00:12:16,536 (Toto) Dios mío! It's incredible. 203 00:12:16,569 --> 00:12:19,439 They get satellite here. 204 00:12:19,472 --> 00:12:22,375 (gasps) Can't believe... 205 00:12:23,877 --> 00:12:26,279 Do you see what I see? Yeah. 206 00:12:26,313 --> 00:12:29,783 All the houses are so tiny. It's a small world, after all. 207 00:12:29,817 --> 00:12:32,820 Oh, my gosh. What...? I can't believe it. 208 00:12:32,853 --> 00:12:35,989 I can't believe it. 209 00:12:36,023 --> 00:12:37,791 (Dorothy) Oh, man! 210 00:12:39,292 --> 00:12:41,361 Toto... 211 00:12:41,394 --> 00:12:43,931 Where the...? Wait! 212 00:12:43,964 --> 00:12:46,934 For those of you who have Dark Side of the Moon, press play... 213 00:12:46,967 --> 00:12:49,169 (chattering) ...now. 214 00:12:49,202 --> 00:12:52,539 Ay, Chihuahua! No, wait. They're not Chihuahuas. 215 00:12:52,572 --> 00:12:54,541 Ay, rats! Rats in hats! 216 00:12:54,574 --> 00:12:57,444 (chuckles) Rats in hats, get it? 217 00:12:57,477 --> 00:12:59,913 I am a poet and I didn't even realize I had such capabilities. 218 00:12:59,947 --> 00:13:03,216 OK. I work in a diner, I know how to handle rats. 219 00:13:03,250 --> 00:13:04,551 Rats? We ain't rats. 220 00:13:04,584 --> 00:13:07,554 Excuse me. Pardon me. Coming through. 221 00:13:07,587 --> 00:13:09,556 We're the Munchkins of Munchkinland. 222 00:13:09,589 --> 00:13:12,425 The book, the book, the book! Come on, come on, come on. 223 00:13:14,127 --> 00:13:16,563 OK. And I quote: 224 00:13:16,596 --> 00:13:19,833 Ahem. "Rat: a long-tailed rodent, 225 00:13:19,867 --> 00:13:23,603 especially one of the genus Rattus. 226 00:13:23,636 --> 00:13:28,175 "Munchkin: a cuddly, cute and clean creature 227 00:13:28,208 --> 00:13:31,411 who resides in the land of Oz." 228 00:13:31,444 --> 00:13:32,846 Munchkins? Yeah. 229 00:13:32,880 --> 00:13:34,982 Sorry, but I know a rat when I see one. 230 00:13:35,015 --> 00:13:37,117 Hey. Whatever you say there, short stacks. 231 00:13:37,150 --> 00:13:39,219 All I know is, thanks to you, the Wicked Witch of the East 232 00:13:39,252 --> 00:13:41,221 is dead and we are free! 233 00:13:41,254 --> 00:13:43,456 (cheering) (woman) Free? 234 00:13:43,490 --> 00:13:47,627 You're not free! Get over here and get this tin can off me! Now! 235 00:13:47,660 --> 00:13:50,630 Oh, my gosh, she's alive! Quick, we gotta help her! 236 00:13:50,663 --> 00:13:52,832 (muttering) (woman) Please, help me up! 237 00:13:56,036 --> 00:13:58,171 Well, Munchkins, we're too late. 238 00:13:58,205 --> 00:13:59,572 Guys! But no tears - 239 00:13:59,606 --> 00:14:01,408 she's in a better place. 240 00:14:01,441 --> 00:14:03,376 (all) Yeah! 241 00:14:03,410 --> 00:14:05,578 (grunting) 242 00:14:09,516 --> 00:14:11,218 I'm gonna put you in a better place - 243 00:14:11,251 --> 00:14:13,887 in my oven! You hear me? 244 00:14:15,022 --> 00:14:17,124 Um... (giggles) 245 00:14:17,157 --> 00:14:19,426 Could someone spot me? 246 00:14:19,459 --> 00:14:22,329 Wow! This is a lot heavier than I... 247 00:14:26,099 --> 00:14:27,901 Ew! 248 00:14:30,570 --> 00:14:33,073 OK. Now she's dead! 249 00:14:35,242 --> 00:14:37,144 (Toto) What is that? 250 00:14:39,146 --> 00:14:43,016 Hey, look! Even the twisters are Munchkin-sized. 251 00:14:43,050 --> 00:14:45,018 Oh, that's no twister - that's her sister. 252 00:14:45,052 --> 00:14:46,686 She's the sister of the witch 253 00:14:46,719 --> 00:14:48,989 that you just crushed with a house. 254 00:14:50,523 --> 00:14:51,391 Sister? 255 00:14:54,427 --> 00:14:57,330 Bonjour, Munchie-kins! (giggles) 256 00:14:57,364 --> 00:14:59,933 Cuddles! Cuddles! 257 00:14:59,967 --> 00:15:02,035 (kissing noises) 258 00:15:02,069 --> 00:15:04,304 Each and every one of you! 259 00:15:04,337 --> 00:15:06,406 My speed dating ended early, 260 00:15:06,439 --> 00:15:08,708 so I thought I'd drop in for a cuddle 261 00:15:08,741 --> 00:15:10,443 and a visit with my wicked East-Coast sister. 262 00:15:10,477 --> 00:15:12,512 Uh... Yeah, well, 263 00:15:12,545 --> 00:15:15,715 a funny thing about the East-Coast sister. 264 00:15:15,748 --> 00:15:18,318 Not so much funny as... uh... uh... 265 00:15:18,351 --> 00:15:21,554 disturbing. Disturbing. Yes. 266 00:15:21,588 --> 00:15:24,024 You see, this giant girl right over here 267 00:15:24,057 --> 00:15:26,626 kinda squashed her to death with a double-wide. 268 00:15:26,659 --> 00:15:28,528 What? Yeah. 269 00:15:28,561 --> 00:15:31,498 Uh... Right here. 270 00:15:32,665 --> 00:15:34,334 (gasps) 271 00:15:34,367 --> 00:15:37,370 Excuse me, I just want you to know 272 00:15:37,404 --> 00:15:40,473 that I've never met this giant girl before in my entire life. 273 00:15:40,507 --> 00:15:43,243 Sorry, Dorothy... um... Giant Girl. 274 00:15:43,276 --> 00:15:45,445 It was an accident. I swear. 275 00:15:45,478 --> 00:15:49,182 Well, in that case, c'est la vie! La vie! La vie! 276 00:15:49,216 --> 00:15:52,519 I drop things all the time myself. 277 00:15:52,552 --> 00:15:54,354 Charmed to make your acquaintance. 278 00:15:54,387 --> 00:15:58,491 I am Tattypoo, the old and Good Witch of the North. 279 00:15:58,525 --> 00:16:00,193 But you're so young and beautiful. 280 00:16:00,227 --> 00:16:02,029 (giggles) Aren't you a cutie! 281 00:16:02,062 --> 00:16:03,696 (Munchkin) No, you are! You are! 282 00:16:03,730 --> 00:16:07,400 So tell me, what kind of magical abilities do you have? 283 00:16:07,434 --> 00:16:10,070 Well, I don't have any magical abilities, 284 00:16:10,103 --> 00:16:13,140 but I am a singer. I mean, I want to be a singer. 285 00:16:13,173 --> 00:16:16,109 (Toto) Mm, and she's very good, OK. A singer? 286 00:16:16,143 --> 00:16:18,345 Really? Oh, that's so funny! I'm a singer too. 287 00:16:18,378 --> 00:16:21,081 Yes, my sisters and I 288 00:16:21,114 --> 00:16:22,415 were once the hottest girl band in Oz. Yeah! 289 00:16:25,785 --> 00:16:29,589 But all that fame and fortune left me feeling empty inside. 290 00:16:29,622 --> 00:16:32,192 So I quit show biz and committed my life 291 00:16:32,225 --> 00:16:35,195 to advancing rights for the vertically challenged of Oz, 292 00:16:35,228 --> 00:16:37,230 my little Munchie-wunchies. 293 00:16:37,264 --> 00:16:39,199 Aw! Cuddles! 294 00:16:40,733 --> 00:16:42,202 (giggling) 295 00:16:42,235 --> 00:16:45,072 Oh, yes! 296 00:16:45,105 --> 00:16:47,040 (kissing noises) 297 00:16:48,741 --> 00:16:51,744 Well, it's been nice meeting you and all, 298 00:16:51,778 --> 00:16:54,447 but I should probably be on my way. 299 00:16:54,481 --> 00:16:56,449 Anyone know how to get to Kansas from here? 300 00:16:56,483 --> 00:16:59,686 Never heard of it. Is this Kansas a civilized country? 301 00:16:59,719 --> 00:17:02,589 Well, if by civilized you mean flat, boring and gray, 302 00:17:02,622 --> 00:17:04,491 yeah, it's civilized. 303 00:17:04,524 --> 00:17:05,825 Well, then, why do you want to go back? 304 00:17:05,858 --> 00:17:09,162 Yeah, why do we want to go back? Well, because... 305 00:17:09,196 --> 00:17:12,399 Aunt Em and... Well... 306 00:17:12,432 --> 00:17:15,468 I don't know what Kansas is, but if you want to be a famous singer, 307 00:17:15,502 --> 00:17:18,638 you must see the wonderful Wizard of Oz. Yeah! 308 00:17:18,671 --> 00:17:21,308 First... 309 00:17:21,341 --> 00:17:23,410 (grunts) (pop) 310 00:17:23,443 --> 00:17:25,512 ...you have to wear my sister's shoes. Here. 311 00:17:25,545 --> 00:17:29,849 You want me to wear shoes off a nasty old witch? I don't think so. 312 00:17:29,882 --> 00:17:32,752 Oh, but there's a powerful magic connected to them. 313 00:17:32,785 --> 00:17:35,155 And look how sparkly they are. 314 00:17:35,188 --> 00:17:36,756 Mm-mm. 315 00:17:39,759 --> 00:17:42,362 (laughs) 316 00:17:42,395 --> 00:17:45,198 (continues laughing) 317 00:17:45,232 --> 00:17:48,635 Listen, high pockets, here's how things work in enchanted lands. 318 00:17:48,668 --> 00:17:50,637 Shoes have magical powers. 319 00:17:50,670 --> 00:17:52,805 If you have the shoes, you get the powers. 320 00:17:52,839 --> 00:17:56,243 But if you're going to question every little detail, 321 00:17:56,276 --> 00:17:58,845 the whole thing's gonna fall apart and we might as well call it a day, OK? 322 00:17:58,878 --> 00:18:01,314 (Munchkins) OK? 323 00:18:01,348 --> 00:18:04,384 (singsong) They're Manolos. 324 00:18:04,417 --> 00:18:07,154 Manolos? Why didn't you say that? 325 00:18:08,855 --> 00:18:11,491 Check the label. Yeah, they're good. 326 00:18:11,524 --> 00:18:14,327 I'll help you, OK. (all) Ooh! 327 00:18:16,863 --> 00:18:19,366 Those are unbelievable, OK? 328 00:18:22,835 --> 00:18:26,206 Wow! They fit perfectly! 329 00:18:26,239 --> 00:18:28,808 If the power of these magic shoes is supposed to make you feel 330 00:18:28,841 --> 00:18:32,912 confident and sexy, then mission accomplished. 331 00:18:32,945 --> 00:18:34,681 So, take me to meet your wizard. 332 00:18:34,714 --> 00:18:36,916 To get to the wizard, 333 00:18:36,949 --> 00:18:41,488 just follow this road of yellow brick to Emerald City. 334 00:18:41,521 --> 00:18:43,756 It's in the exact center of our country. 335 00:18:43,790 --> 00:18:45,792 Wait, I gotta walk to the center of your country? 336 00:18:45,825 --> 00:18:47,427 There's not, like, a bus or something I can take? 337 00:18:47,460 --> 00:18:51,264 You wanna be a star or not? OK, OK, sorry. 338 00:18:51,298 --> 00:18:52,932 Well, let's go. 339 00:18:52,965 --> 00:18:56,336 Oh, hold up there, Giant Girl. The name's Dorothy. 340 00:18:56,369 --> 00:19:00,240 Well, Dorothy, we Munchkins kinda owe ya for saving us and all. 341 00:19:00,273 --> 00:19:03,543 You ever need a favor, you just give us a holler, like so... 342 00:19:04,877 --> 00:19:06,846 (blows pitch pipe) 343 00:19:06,879 --> 00:19:08,481 * Calling all Munchkins 344 00:19:08,515 --> 00:19:10,483 * Let's do lunchkins 345 00:19:10,517 --> 00:19:12,352 * One for all * And all for one 346 00:19:12,385 --> 00:19:16,256 * Calling all Munchkins Munchkins, Munchkins, Munchkins 347 00:19:16,289 --> 00:19:18,391 * Take our call 348 00:19:18,425 --> 00:19:21,361 You sing that and we'll come a-scampering. 349 00:19:21,394 --> 00:19:24,331 Uh, yeah, we'll be sure to do this, OK. Let's go, Dorothy. 350 00:19:24,364 --> 00:19:26,666 One more thing. (giggles) 351 00:19:26,699 --> 00:19:28,435 I don't know why I didn't mention this before. 352 00:19:28,468 --> 00:19:31,204 Whatever you do, avoid the west. 353 00:19:31,238 --> 00:19:33,206 My other evil sister rules there, 354 00:19:33,240 --> 00:19:35,942 and if she finds out you have the silver shoes, 355 00:19:35,975 --> 00:19:37,844 she'll hunt you down and pry them off your cold, dead carcass. 356 00:19:37,877 --> 00:19:40,447 What? (giggles) Bye. 357 00:19:40,480 --> 00:19:42,582 Why are you just now telling me this? 358 00:19:45,252 --> 00:19:47,654 Come on, Dorothy. You're not getting any younger, OK. 359 00:19:47,687 --> 00:19:49,856 Let's go get famous. 360 00:19:49,889 --> 00:19:52,925 I don't know. That Witch of the West thing sounds kind of dangerous. 361 00:19:52,959 --> 00:19:56,363 Don't worry about it. You're going to have to trust me, you know? 362 00:19:56,396 --> 00:19:57,964 I'm your agent, OK. I'm your agent. 363 00:19:57,997 --> 00:20:01,568 When did I make you my agent? Well, since you're asking, 364 00:20:01,601 --> 00:20:03,470 I thought possibly what we could do is... 365 00:20:03,503 --> 00:20:05,438 Come on, short stuff. (muffled talking) 366 00:20:12,345 --> 00:20:14,447 (Dorothy) I wish you'd stop with this whole agent thing. 367 00:20:14,481 --> 00:20:18,285 Yes, yes, I know. It's very awkward for you, OK. 368 00:20:18,318 --> 00:20:20,820 But I think it's very important that we discuss my commission. 369 00:20:20,853 --> 00:20:25,625 So, it seems that 50 percent is easiest. 370 00:20:25,658 --> 00:20:27,560 I think I liked it better when you couldn't talk. 371 00:20:27,594 --> 00:20:28,595 (laughs) 372 00:20:28,628 --> 00:20:30,997 Well, you think about it, OK. Take your time. 373 00:20:31,030 --> 00:20:33,766 I'm gonna get some corn. It's fresh on the cobs, OK. 374 00:20:35,868 --> 00:20:37,604 (laughs) 375 00:20:44,411 --> 00:20:47,447 What are you doing? What? 376 00:20:47,480 --> 00:20:51,318 You didn't by chance see that movie The Passion, huh? 377 00:20:51,351 --> 00:20:53,320 No, so don't ruin the ending. No, that's not what-- 378 00:20:53,353 --> 00:20:55,888 Personally, I liked The Birds. Figures. 379 00:20:55,922 --> 00:20:57,957 Hey, you got something in your eye. What? 380 00:20:57,990 --> 00:21:00,460 This! Yah! Yah! Yah! Hey, stop that! 381 00:21:00,493 --> 00:21:02,695 You...! 382 00:21:02,729 --> 00:21:04,030 Hey, stop that! (laughs) 383 00:21:04,063 --> 00:21:06,733 Hey! Oh, this is the last straw! 384 00:21:06,766 --> 00:21:08,835 No, I see one right here. Stop that! 385 00:21:08,868 --> 00:21:11,538 Get our grubby beak off him! Huh? 386 00:21:13,005 --> 00:21:14,874 (cuckoo clock chirping) 387 00:21:14,907 --> 00:21:17,377 Cuckoo! 388 00:21:17,410 --> 00:21:20,413 You OK? Huh? What? 389 00:21:20,447 --> 00:21:23,516 Oh, I'm fine. But lucky for that crow you showed up when you did 390 00:21:23,550 --> 00:21:25,985 'cause I was gonna come off of these sticks and I was gonna... 391 00:21:26,018 --> 00:21:27,987 I was... uh... 392 00:21:28,020 --> 00:21:30,723 Yeah, thanks. I think I owe you one. 393 00:21:30,757 --> 00:21:33,025 Name's Scarecrow. 394 00:21:33,059 --> 00:21:35,061 I'm Dorothy. And that's Toto. 395 00:21:35,094 --> 00:21:36,996 Mm-mm. Hola! 396 00:21:37,029 --> 00:21:39,399 Um... You got any butter? Oh, what the hey? 397 00:21:39,432 --> 00:21:43,069 Go ahead and eat the corn. Better you than the birds. 398 00:21:43,102 --> 00:21:46,806 I'm the worst scarecrow ever, but what can I do? 399 00:21:46,839 --> 00:21:51,344 I'm tied to a job I'm no good at... literally. 400 00:21:51,378 --> 00:21:54,847 Well, if you ask me, I think it's time for a career change. 401 00:21:54,881 --> 00:21:58,418 No, no. I can't do that. I'm not good at anything because... 402 00:22:01,053 --> 00:22:03,523 (whispers) ...I don't have a brain. 403 00:22:03,556 --> 00:22:06,058 You don't have a brain? Right. 404 00:22:06,092 --> 00:22:08,928 Why are you whispering? What? 405 00:22:08,961 --> 00:22:12,465 Uh... well, I can't really answer that because... 406 00:22:14,100 --> 00:22:16,803 I don't have a brain. 407 00:22:16,836 --> 00:22:18,805 Well, let's get you down from there. 408 00:22:18,838 --> 00:22:20,740 Now, why didn't I think of that? 409 00:22:20,773 --> 00:22:23,410 Oh, right. No brain. Whoa! 410 00:22:23,443 --> 00:22:26,479 Oh, why, thank you, Dorothy. 411 00:22:26,513 --> 00:22:27,847 You're welcome, Scarecrow. 412 00:22:27,880 --> 00:22:29,048 (burps) 413 00:22:29,081 --> 00:22:31,818 This was me. Ugh! 414 00:22:31,851 --> 00:22:34,854 What? What? You can smell it? 415 00:22:34,887 --> 00:22:37,524 You know, we're on our way to meet the Wizard of Oz 416 00:22:37,557 --> 00:22:39,892 and he's gonna make me a superstar singer. 417 00:22:39,926 --> 00:22:42,862 And if he can do that, I bet he can give you a brain. 418 00:22:42,895 --> 00:22:45,832 If I had a brain, I wouldn't be stupid. 419 00:22:45,865 --> 00:22:49,669 And if I wasn't stupid, I'd be able to do something important. 420 00:22:49,702 --> 00:22:51,738 You know, something that helps people's lives. 421 00:22:51,771 --> 00:22:53,673 Well, how about it, then? 422 00:22:53,706 --> 00:22:55,675 Will you come with us to Emerald City to meet the wizard? 423 00:22:55,708 --> 00:22:58,010 Emerald? You mean, it's green? 424 00:22:58,044 --> 00:23:00,747 You bet! I like it already. 425 00:23:00,780 --> 00:23:02,815 I can't believe. 426 00:23:02,849 --> 00:23:05,017 Thank you. I can't believe. 427 00:23:05,051 --> 00:23:09,188 She's got to pick up every Tom, Dick and Carlos on the road, OK. 428 00:23:09,221 --> 00:23:11,524 This is totally unacceptable, OK. These shoes are killing me. 429 00:23:11,558 --> 00:23:13,460 Totally unacceptable. 430 00:23:13,493 --> 00:23:15,662 Come on, come on. Quit busting my shell, OK. 431 00:23:15,695 --> 00:23:18,865 My client is A-list now, she deserves the A-list monies, OK. 432 00:23:18,898 --> 00:23:21,568 Will you knock it off! You're not an agent. 433 00:23:21,601 --> 00:23:24,837 And the cell phone isn't even real. What? 434 00:23:24,871 --> 00:23:26,573 It's a candy dispenser. 435 00:23:29,742 --> 00:23:31,478 Listen, I'm gonna have to call you back. 436 00:23:31,511 --> 00:23:33,580 The diva's having a meltdown, OK. 437 00:23:33,613 --> 00:23:36,849 Ooh! Cinnamints. Hey, do you hear that? 438 00:23:36,883 --> 00:23:39,586 (engine) Sounds like it's coming from over there. 439 00:23:41,721 --> 00:23:44,591 "T-i-n." Wonder what that means. 440 00:23:44,624 --> 00:23:47,627 Maybe, "trust in no one." It could be a sign. 441 00:23:47,660 --> 00:23:50,162 Yeah, there's another sign: "Danger. High Voltage." 442 00:23:50,196 --> 00:23:52,532 Wonder what that means? Hmm. 443 00:23:53,966 --> 00:23:56,503 (door creaks) 444 00:23:59,839 --> 00:24:02,174 Hello? 445 00:24:02,208 --> 00:24:04,711 Look! Look at all the computers, OK. Yeah. 446 00:24:07,146 --> 00:24:09,148 (Scarecrow) Is there somebody in that chair? 447 00:24:09,181 --> 00:24:11,684 There's somebody in that chair! 448 00:24:11,718 --> 00:24:15,087 Dios mío! He's twitching, he's twitching. 449 00:24:15,121 --> 00:24:17,256 Think he's stuck? You think he needs our help? 450 00:24:17,289 --> 00:24:20,259 Do you think he could check my e-mails? 451 00:24:20,292 --> 00:24:23,830 Maybe we should press this restart button. 452 00:24:26,533 --> 00:24:28,467 (computers humming) 453 00:24:29,969 --> 00:24:32,104 Hey! Hey. 454 00:24:32,138 --> 00:24:34,907 Oh, my God. 455 00:24:34,941 --> 00:24:36,509 Oh! Oh! 456 00:24:36,543 --> 00:24:38,645 Welcome to the Total Intelligence Network. 457 00:24:38,678 --> 00:24:41,814 "TIN" for short. 458 00:24:41,848 --> 00:24:43,983 Ooh! 459 00:24:44,016 --> 00:24:47,053 Wow, I must have froze up trying to run too many programs. 460 00:24:47,086 --> 00:24:50,590 What in the name of all that is holy are you, OK? 461 00:24:50,623 --> 00:24:53,593 Oh, I'm a Tin Thing. A fully-robotic information-gathering device 462 00:24:53,626 --> 00:24:55,261 for the Wicked Witch of the West, 463 00:24:55,294 --> 00:24:57,797 and I can answer any question in the universe. 464 00:24:57,830 --> 00:24:59,799 Anything. I got one. 465 00:24:59,832 --> 00:25:02,535 Why are the women so confusing, OK? 466 00:25:02,569 --> 00:25:04,971 Let me process that. Huh! 467 00:25:07,039 --> 00:25:08,775 (grunting) 468 00:25:08,808 --> 00:25:11,143 (sighs) 469 00:25:11,177 --> 00:25:14,180 It only seems that way because men are so simple. 470 00:25:14,213 --> 00:25:16,583 Wow. He is a clever unit. Hmm. 471 00:25:16,616 --> 00:25:19,251 Yeah, you know, I'd give my stuffed foot for half of your brains. 472 00:25:19,285 --> 00:25:21,988 Take it from me - brains don't make you happy. 473 00:25:22,021 --> 00:25:24,190 I'm nothing but a brain, thanks to the Wicked Witch. 474 00:25:24,223 --> 00:25:26,826 She made you like this? Did she ever! 475 00:25:26,859 --> 00:25:28,260 When I was a young research assistant, 476 00:25:28,294 --> 00:25:30,663 I made the mistake of asking for a vacation 477 00:25:30,697 --> 00:25:34,233 so I could marry the love of my life Camilla. 478 00:25:34,266 --> 00:25:37,003 (Toto) She's a chicken? Weirdo. 479 00:25:37,036 --> 00:25:38,638 And the Wicked Witch got so angry, 480 00:25:38,671 --> 00:25:41,741 she waved her wand and ka-blowie! 481 00:25:41,774 --> 00:25:46,746 Next thing I know, I'm a walking, talking robotic... thing. 482 00:25:46,779 --> 00:25:48,815 Oh! That's terrible. 483 00:25:48,848 --> 00:25:50,850 Yeah, she could have just said no. 484 00:25:50,883 --> 00:25:52,685 Yeah, but why did she turn you into a robot? 485 00:25:52,719 --> 00:25:54,754 Because... (hollow knock) 486 00:25:54,787 --> 00:25:56,689 ...robots don't have hearts, 487 00:25:56,723 --> 00:25:58,691 and without a heart, I couldn't love Camilla. 488 00:25:58,725 --> 00:26:01,360 And without Camilla, I could work day and night. 489 00:26:01,393 --> 00:26:02,294 (sighs) 490 00:26:02,328 --> 00:26:07,199 Well, nice talking to you. Back to work. 491 00:26:07,233 --> 00:26:10,737 Um, excuse me. Mm? Huh? 492 00:26:10,770 --> 00:26:12,805 We're on our way to see the Wizard of Oz 493 00:26:12,839 --> 00:26:14,173 and he's gonna make me a famous singer. 494 00:26:14,206 --> 00:26:15,708 Yeah, and he's gonna give me a brain. 495 00:26:15,742 --> 00:26:18,077 Sí, and he probably give me lots of monies, OK. 496 00:26:18,110 --> 00:26:21,681 And if he can do that, I'm sure he can give you a heart. 497 00:26:21,714 --> 00:26:25,017 Really? Well, I'm sure if I had a heart, I could win Camilla back. 498 00:26:25,051 --> 00:26:27,353 Yeah! Maybe I will go with you. 499 00:26:27,386 --> 00:26:30,189 All right, well, let's go! All right! 500 00:26:30,222 --> 00:26:32,058 Aah! 501 00:26:32,091 --> 00:26:34,661 (grunts) Oh! 502 00:26:34,694 --> 00:26:38,665 Are you OK? Sure, I just forgot to untether. Heh-heh. 503 00:26:38,698 --> 00:26:41,267 I don't get out much. OK. 504 00:26:41,300 --> 00:26:43,102 Oh, where's my cell phone? 505 00:26:43,135 --> 00:26:45,872 Ah! (beeps) 506 00:26:45,905 --> 00:26:47,940 OK. OK. 507 00:26:47,974 --> 00:26:50,409 Let's go. Wait a second. 508 00:26:50,442 --> 00:26:52,411 That's your cell phone? Yeah. 509 00:26:52,444 --> 00:26:55,014 Interesting. What do these do? 510 00:26:55,047 --> 00:26:57,383 (squeaking) Nothing. They're my nipples. 511 00:27:00,219 --> 00:27:01,988 (moans) 512 00:27:03,389 --> 00:27:05,024 (yells) 513 00:27:06,425 --> 00:27:09,161 I feel dirty! 514 00:27:09,195 --> 00:27:12,198 What a weirdo. 515 00:27:12,231 --> 00:27:13,700 (hoots) 516 00:27:13,733 --> 00:27:15,267 (animals yelping) 517 00:27:19,105 --> 00:27:21,240 This creepy forest goes on forever. 518 00:27:21,273 --> 00:27:22,942 (all) You can say that again. 519 00:27:22,975 --> 00:27:25,444 Anyone know how much further? My feet are killing me. 520 00:27:25,477 --> 00:27:29,081 I gotta sit down. (Toto) Sí, me too. Scoot over. 521 00:27:29,115 --> 00:27:32,118 (Tin Thing) Oh, boy. 522 00:27:32,151 --> 00:27:36,022 These shoes may be magical, but they're not so comfortable. 523 00:27:36,055 --> 00:27:38,157 Sí, they can put a trailer in Munchkinland 524 00:27:38,190 --> 00:27:40,059 but they can't make a magic shoe that's comfortable. 525 00:27:40,092 --> 00:27:41,828 Go figure. 526 00:27:41,861 --> 00:27:43,963 (log) Ouch! 527 00:27:43,996 --> 00:27:47,466 This place is crazy. Even the logs talk. 528 00:27:47,499 --> 00:27:50,069 Hmm? 529 00:27:50,102 --> 00:27:53,305 Uh, Dorothy? Yeah? 530 00:27:53,339 --> 00:27:55,842 What is...? 531 00:27:55,875 --> 00:27:58,044 What do you...? Lion? Shrimp? 532 00:27:58,077 --> 00:28:00,146 No, prawn. Oh, prawn. 533 00:28:00,179 --> 00:28:01,814 (both scream) 534 00:28:01,848 --> 00:28:03,249 Toto! 535 00:28:03,282 --> 00:28:05,017 (continue screaming) 536 00:28:07,353 --> 00:28:10,256 (Lion) Get... off... OK. 537 00:28:10,289 --> 00:28:12,024 ...my... tail! Oh! OK! 538 00:28:12,058 --> 00:28:14,160 (screaming) 539 00:28:14,193 --> 00:28:15,327 Hey! 540 00:28:15,361 --> 00:28:17,096 Get your paws off my prawn! 541 00:28:20,299 --> 00:28:22,802 Please don't hit me. Take anything you want. 542 00:28:22,835 --> 00:28:25,404 Here, my wallet. It's Velcro. Take it. 543 00:28:28,140 --> 00:28:31,243 Well, look at you. You're nothing but a big coward. 544 00:28:31,277 --> 00:28:34,246 So are you going to eat me or not? 545 00:28:34,280 --> 00:28:38,017 Eat you? Why would we do that? Don't you work for... 546 00:28:38,050 --> 00:28:40,252 She Who Must Not Be Named? 547 00:28:41,921 --> 00:28:44,290 Who? Oh! You mean the Wicked Witch of the West? 548 00:28:44,323 --> 00:28:45,958 No, we don't even like her. 549 00:28:45,992 --> 00:28:50,863 B-b-b-because we love her so much! Ha-ha-ha-ha. 550 00:28:50,897 --> 00:28:53,933 Are you crazy? The Wicked Witch of the West has spies everywhere. 551 00:28:53,966 --> 00:28:58,237 The trees, the shrubs, the owls, the bunnies. 552 00:28:58,270 --> 00:29:01,941 Evil, savage bunnies. 553 00:29:01,974 --> 00:29:04,110 (sinister laughter) 554 00:29:06,412 --> 00:29:09,048 (Dorothy) You're king of the beasts. 555 00:29:09,081 --> 00:29:10,917 If some critter gives you attitude, all you gotta do is 556 00:29:10,950 --> 00:29:13,920 let out a big roar. (both) Yeah. 557 00:29:13,953 --> 00:29:16,856 But I don't want to scare anyone. I just want to make people laugh. 558 00:29:16,889 --> 00:29:19,225 Yeah. Kill 'em with comedy - that's my motto. 559 00:29:19,258 --> 00:29:22,328 I dream of one day being Oz's greatest stand-up comedian. 560 00:29:22,361 --> 00:29:24,463 Well, you ever play Emerald City? 561 00:29:24,496 --> 00:29:27,299 I've never played, period. I've got stage fright. 562 00:29:27,333 --> 00:29:29,802 OK. Tell us a joke now. 563 00:29:29,836 --> 00:29:32,138 There's no stage. Yeah, go ahead. 564 00:29:32,171 --> 00:29:34,140 No, I can't... Come on. 565 00:29:34,173 --> 00:29:36,475 OK. I can do this. Um... 566 00:29:36,508 --> 00:29:38,110 (drumroll) 567 00:29:38,144 --> 00:29:40,813 Wacka, wacka, wacka! 568 00:29:40,847 --> 00:29:42,348 Hey, there. Thanks for coming tonight. 569 00:29:42,381 --> 00:29:44,350 So, what's the deal with the wizard? 570 00:29:44,383 --> 00:29:48,054 For someone so wonderful, he certainly doesn't know how to... 571 00:29:48,087 --> 00:29:49,321 (stammers) 572 00:29:49,355 --> 00:29:51,824 S-s-sorry. Performance anxiety. 573 00:29:51,858 --> 00:29:54,560 (gasps for air) 574 00:29:54,593 --> 00:29:56,829 Hey, you know, we're on our way to Emerald City 575 00:29:56,863 --> 00:29:58,965 to ask the wizard for some help. (Scarecrow) Mm-hmm. 576 00:29:58,998 --> 00:30:01,333 Maybe he can give you some courage. Courage? 577 00:30:01,367 --> 00:30:04,436 Gosh, that sounds... scary. 578 00:30:04,470 --> 00:30:07,339 Oh, don't worry. It'll be OK. 579 00:30:07,373 --> 00:30:10,877 Yeah, I mean, so you're not so brave. I'm not so smart. 580 00:30:10,910 --> 00:30:13,112 And I'm so empty inside, I could cry. 581 00:30:13,145 --> 00:30:15,314 Sí, and I'm so gosh-darn sexy, it hurts. 582 00:30:15,347 --> 00:30:16,916 See, we all have our issues. 583 00:30:16,949 --> 00:30:19,385 But we're working 'em out... together. Yeah. 584 00:30:19,418 --> 00:30:22,254 Right. I mean, what are friends for? 585 00:30:22,288 --> 00:30:24,390 * Where my brain should be 586 00:30:24,423 --> 00:30:26,625 * There's a cavity 587 00:30:26,658 --> 00:30:28,895 * Where most folks have hearts 588 00:30:28,928 --> 00:30:31,397 * I've got old spare parts 589 00:30:33,499 --> 00:30:35,634 * Now I'm on my own 590 00:30:35,667 --> 00:30:40,472 * In the great unknown 591 00:30:40,506 --> 00:30:44,176 * And it's more than one person can bear 592 00:30:44,210 --> 00:30:46,578 Bear? Ah! Where? 593 00:30:46,612 --> 00:30:50,082 * Well, now I've got some smart new partners 594 00:30:50,116 --> 00:30:53,986 * Who can help me think things through 595 00:30:54,020 --> 00:30:56,455 * Folks say I'm just a hick on a stick 596 00:30:56,488 --> 00:30:58,557 * Well, that may be true Sí, it's true. 597 00:30:58,590 --> 00:31:01,560 * But when my stuffing's not enough 598 00:31:01,593 --> 00:31:05,531 * I know just what I should do-la-dee-doo 599 00:31:05,564 --> 00:31:08,100 * See, I don't miss the brains I'm missing 600 00:31:08,134 --> 00:31:11,370 * When I'm with you 601 00:31:11,403 --> 00:31:14,406 * I used to be romance compatible 602 00:31:14,440 --> 00:31:17,509 * I wrote sonnets and waltzes and more 603 00:31:17,543 --> 00:31:20,446 * But now that my heart is mechanical 604 00:31:20,479 --> 00:31:23,515 * It only beats four-on-the-floor 605 00:31:23,549 --> 00:31:25,617 (Tin Thing makes drumming noise) (Lion) Oh, nice! 606 00:31:25,651 --> 00:31:29,188 * But you've got friends to stand beside you 607 00:31:29,221 --> 00:31:32,191 * And we'll reboot your old CPU 608 00:31:32,224 --> 00:31:35,127 * Wow! I don't miss the heart I'm missing 609 00:31:35,161 --> 00:31:38,630 * When I'm with you 610 00:31:38,664 --> 00:31:41,500 * I wish my stage fright weren't so terrible 611 00:31:41,533 --> 00:31:44,503 * My jokes never garner a roar 612 00:31:44,536 --> 00:31:47,639 * With us you can try new material 613 00:31:47,673 --> 00:31:53,412 * You see, that's what friends are for 614 00:31:53,445 --> 00:31:56,515 * Now you can sleep without a night-light 615 00:31:56,548 --> 00:31:58,150 * And forget every... 616 00:31:58,184 --> 00:32:00,019 * Creak, bang and boo! 617 00:32:00,052 --> 00:32:02,554 * Hey! I don't miss the spine I'm missing 618 00:32:02,588 --> 00:32:05,657 * When I'm with you 619 00:32:05,691 --> 00:32:09,161 * Still we've got something great together 620 00:32:09,195 --> 00:32:12,498 * So let's all get up and go 621 00:32:12,531 --> 00:32:14,233 * We'll overachieve 622 00:32:14,266 --> 00:32:15,968 * Wear our hearts on our sleeves 623 00:32:16,002 --> 00:32:18,604 * Get on with the show 624 00:32:18,637 --> 00:32:21,974 * Now we are in the right direction 625 00:32:22,008 --> 00:32:25,311 * And I see all our dreams coming true 626 00:32:25,344 --> 00:32:28,547 * Yes, anything is possible 627 00:32:28,580 --> 00:32:31,317 * When I'm with you 628 00:32:31,350 --> 00:32:34,320 * I'm just so sexy! Wow, a shrimp that shimmies! 629 00:32:34,353 --> 00:32:37,389 * Our act's unfloppable * Troubles are hoppable 630 00:32:37,423 --> 00:32:40,526 * It's all so logical * We'll be unstoppable 631 00:32:40,559 --> 00:32:43,195 * Cashmere is washable * Anything is possible 632 00:32:43,229 --> 00:32:45,131 * When I'm 633 00:32:45,164 --> 00:32:49,768 * With you 634 00:32:49,801 --> 00:32:51,570 * I'm with you 635 00:32:53,205 --> 00:32:55,074 * I'm with you 636 00:32:56,208 --> 00:32:59,345 * I'm with you 637 00:32:59,378 --> 00:33:01,280 * I'm with... 638 00:33:02,581 --> 00:33:05,151 * You 639 00:33:05,184 --> 00:33:07,086 Great! Let's go! 640 00:33:07,119 --> 00:33:08,754 (Dorothy) Come on, guys. (Toto) Let's get rich, come on! 641 00:33:08,787 --> 00:33:10,156 (Tin Thing) Come on, Dorothy! 642 00:33:12,624 --> 00:33:15,127 It's dark. 643 00:33:15,161 --> 00:33:17,096 Anybody got a night-light? 644 00:33:17,129 --> 00:33:18,397 (all gasp) 645 00:33:22,434 --> 00:33:25,804 Just to let you know, nothing scares me more than heights. 646 00:33:25,837 --> 00:33:28,574 (laughter) 647 00:33:28,607 --> 00:33:30,309 (Tin Thing) There's a pair of vicious Kalidah Critics. 648 00:33:30,342 --> 00:33:32,111 Very rare in these parts. 649 00:33:32,144 --> 00:33:36,648 Those monstrous beasts just love to rip performers to shreds. 650 00:33:36,682 --> 00:33:39,551 Really? How? 651 00:33:39,585 --> 00:33:41,687 They do it with their... (gulps) 652 00:33:41,720 --> 00:33:43,522 words. 653 00:33:43,555 --> 00:33:46,558 So, all we gotta do is ignore their words 654 00:33:46,592 --> 00:33:48,727 and keep our balance all the way to other side. 655 00:33:48,760 --> 00:33:51,163 That's right. What? 656 00:33:51,197 --> 00:33:52,698 What are you...? 657 00:33:52,731 --> 00:33:54,766 You're going to cross? Follow me. 658 00:33:54,800 --> 00:33:56,635 Dorothy, don't. You're going to cross? 659 00:33:56,668 --> 00:33:58,637 (critic) You're gonna fall off! You're gonna fall! 660 00:33:58,670 --> 00:34:02,541 You're gonna fall! It's a long way down! 661 00:34:02,574 --> 00:34:05,611 Hey, that's Dorothy Gale, the new overnight sensation. 662 00:34:05,644 --> 00:34:07,146 She's really killing 'em in Munchkinland. 663 00:34:07,179 --> 00:34:09,215 Just ask the Wicked Witch of the East. 664 00:34:09,248 --> 00:34:11,750 I hear she's really bringing down the houses. 665 00:34:11,783 --> 00:34:15,221 (Tin Thing) Shut up! Dorothy. Concentrate, Dorothy. 666 00:34:15,254 --> 00:34:17,756 She made it! Whoo! 667 00:34:17,789 --> 00:34:19,358 All right, let's go. 668 00:34:19,391 --> 00:34:21,627 You go first. OK. You go next. 669 00:34:21,660 --> 00:34:23,662 (critic) I hear it's lonely at the top. (critic #2) Yeah. 670 00:34:23,695 --> 00:34:26,298 Wait till he hits the bottom. 671 00:34:26,332 --> 00:34:28,267 I did it, OK. That was easy for me. 672 00:34:28,300 --> 00:34:30,102 (Tin Thing) That's it, that's it. 673 00:34:30,136 --> 00:34:32,438 One things for sure about playing the Kalidah Bridge. 674 00:34:32,471 --> 00:34:35,307 You're sure to make a big splash! 675 00:34:35,341 --> 00:34:38,310 It's not that far down, anyway. 676 00:34:38,344 --> 00:34:40,712 We made it! We made it! 677 00:34:40,746 --> 00:34:44,283 OK, come on there, Lion. Come on, Lion. 678 00:34:44,316 --> 00:34:47,519 Nice log. (critic) Be careful - it's slippery up there! 679 00:34:47,553 --> 00:34:49,855 Ooh, I feel a wind coming on! 680 00:34:49,888 --> 00:34:52,858 Oh, there's Lion. He thinks he's a comedian. 681 00:34:52,891 --> 00:34:54,860 Yeah, but his jokes bomb so badly, 682 00:34:54,893 --> 00:34:57,896 the army tried to put a fuse on him! 683 00:34:57,929 --> 00:35:00,699 Whoa, whoa! Ahh... 684 00:35:03,269 --> 00:35:05,304 You know, there are two reasons why I don't like Lion's jokes. 685 00:35:05,337 --> 00:35:08,274 What are they? My ears. 686 00:35:08,307 --> 00:35:11,377 I can't do it. I can't do it! I can't do it, guys. I can't move! 687 00:35:11,410 --> 00:35:15,381 Ignore them. What they're saying has nothing to do with you. 688 00:35:15,414 --> 00:35:18,284 What? Unless there's another lion up here on this log, 689 00:35:18,317 --> 00:35:19,851 I think they're talking to me. 690 00:35:19,885 --> 00:35:22,521 I just think he needs a little help. I'm going up. 691 00:35:22,554 --> 00:35:24,890 Be careful. Come on. 692 00:35:24,923 --> 00:35:28,160 (critic) Yeah, your jokes are no good! (critic #2) You're not funny! 693 00:35:28,194 --> 00:35:30,462 Pay no attention to your critics. 694 00:35:30,496 --> 00:35:32,331 It's gonna be one step at a time, OK? 695 00:35:32,364 --> 00:35:36,302 Now take my hand. Put your tail down. 696 00:35:36,335 --> 00:35:39,371 Calm yourself. Now take my hand, come on. 697 00:35:39,405 --> 00:35:41,773 That's it. Now we're just gonna walk off. 698 00:35:41,807 --> 00:35:43,942 Come on. We're just walking. Hang on! 699 00:35:43,975 --> 00:35:46,345 That's it. Steady. You can do it! You can do it! 700 00:35:46,378 --> 00:35:48,614 You're all right. Come on, you've got it. 701 00:35:48,647 --> 00:35:50,849 You've got it. Yes! 702 00:35:54,386 --> 00:35:57,489 Oh, thank you, Tin Thing. 703 00:35:57,523 --> 00:35:59,725 Come on, guys. Let's go. 704 00:35:59,758 --> 00:36:02,294 Go on, get out of here! 705 00:36:02,328 --> 00:36:05,564 Yeah, you'll still never make it to where you're going. 706 00:36:05,597 --> 00:36:08,734 Good work, Lion. Wasn't he great, guys? 707 00:36:08,767 --> 00:36:10,336 He sure was. I don't know. 708 00:36:10,369 --> 00:36:11,837 Hey, what's that, guys? 709 00:36:14,806 --> 00:36:16,475 "Poppyfields." What's that? 710 00:36:19,245 --> 00:36:22,281 Poppyfields? Well, it's only the coolest club in Oz, baby. 711 00:36:22,314 --> 00:36:24,450 This day has been kind of crazy. 712 00:36:24,483 --> 00:36:26,385 It wouldn't hurt to stop and have a little fun. 713 00:36:26,418 --> 00:36:30,622 A little fun? Get ready to have the time of your life, girl. 714 00:36:30,656 --> 00:36:33,525 Come on, Dorothy. Let's get inside before this place is no longer cool. 715 00:36:33,559 --> 00:36:35,461 Yeah. After you. 716 00:36:35,494 --> 00:36:37,396 (* funky jazz) 717 00:36:51,843 --> 00:36:55,013 Heh-heh-heh. All right now, y'all follow me. 718 00:36:55,046 --> 00:36:56,915 I'll put you in the best seats in the house. 719 00:36:56,948 --> 00:36:59,217 Sounds great! 720 00:37:05,824 --> 00:37:08,594 * Nap time 721 00:37:08,627 --> 00:37:10,729 You know, I can't wait till I get a brain so I can understand 722 00:37:10,762 --> 00:37:12,864 what's fun about hanging out at trendy nightclubs. 723 00:37:12,898 --> 00:37:15,000 Yeah. What's the deal with all these poppies anyway? 724 00:37:15,033 --> 00:37:17,569 Whoa. Wait, here comes a fact. 725 00:37:17,603 --> 00:37:20,939 According to my database, the poppy has a powerful sleep-inducing effect. 726 00:37:20,972 --> 00:37:23,375 Sleep-inducing effect? Oh, that's silly. 727 00:37:23,409 --> 00:37:25,010 How could a little flower...? 728 00:37:25,043 --> 00:37:27,579 (snores) 729 00:37:27,613 --> 00:37:29,815 (Tin Thing) Lion? (Scarecrow) Lion, are you OK? 730 00:37:29,848 --> 00:37:32,451 Lion? Is he all right? 731 00:37:32,484 --> 00:37:35,287 He's fine. You know what? 732 00:37:35,321 --> 00:37:37,689 We don't need to go to Emerald City. 733 00:37:37,723 --> 00:37:41,493 We should just stay here at Poppyfields, 734 00:37:41,527 --> 00:37:44,496 where it's so... relaxing. 735 00:37:46,432 --> 00:37:47,733 Dorothy! Dorothy! 736 00:37:47,766 --> 00:37:50,636 Dorothy. Dorothy, wake up. 737 00:37:50,669 --> 00:37:53,839 Dorothy! Lion! Why won't they wake up? 738 00:37:53,872 --> 00:37:56,642 Why won't they wake up? I don't know! 739 00:37:56,675 --> 00:38:00,612 You know, the bathrooms here are so comfortable, OK. 740 00:38:00,646 --> 00:38:03,014 (yawns) 741 00:38:03,048 --> 00:38:05,351 It's the poppies. Come on, let's get Toto out of here 742 00:38:05,384 --> 00:38:07,018 and then we can figure out what to do about Dorothy and Lion. 743 00:38:07,052 --> 00:38:09,721 OK. 744 00:38:09,755 --> 00:38:11,890 Come on. You grab that arm right there. 745 00:38:11,923 --> 00:38:15,327 Nap time. 746 00:38:15,361 --> 00:38:17,696 Ooh, I'm so sleepy, OK. 747 00:38:17,729 --> 00:38:19,798 If something happens to Dorothy, 748 00:38:19,831 --> 00:38:21,833 I don't think I'll ever be able to forgive myself. 749 00:38:21,867 --> 00:38:25,604 I know, but we can't carry them out of there. We have to think. 750 00:38:25,637 --> 00:38:27,539 Oh, rats! I'm no good at thinking. 751 00:38:27,573 --> 00:38:29,908 Whoo, rats! Rats in hats. 752 00:38:29,941 --> 00:38:33,379 What? They said they could... could help us. 753 00:38:33,412 --> 00:38:34,913 Wait! How? How? How? 754 00:38:34,946 --> 00:38:37,015 By singing the song. What? 755 00:38:37,048 --> 00:38:39,785 You know, it goes... 756 00:38:39,818 --> 00:38:41,553 Wait! Sing the song! How does the song go? 757 00:38:41,587 --> 00:38:42,921 * Calling all Munchkins 758 00:38:42,954 --> 00:38:44,456 * Let's do lunchkins Yeah? 759 00:38:44,490 --> 00:38:46,992 * All for one and one for all 760 00:38:47,025 --> 00:38:48,494 * Come on... 761 00:38:48,527 --> 00:38:49,928 Come on, finish it! Come on, come on! 762 00:38:49,961 --> 00:38:52,130 * Munchkins take our... 763 00:38:52,163 --> 00:38:53,565 What? What? 764 00:38:53,599 --> 00:38:54,966 * ...call 765 00:38:55,000 --> 00:38:57,736 Somebody page me? 766 00:38:57,769 --> 00:39:00,672 Dorothy's in trouble. Poppy exposure. 767 00:39:00,706 --> 00:39:03,642 Poppies? Rats! Munchkins, fall in! 768 00:39:03,675 --> 00:39:05,477 We've got a girl to save. 769 00:39:07,112 --> 00:39:09,481 (all) Sir, yes, sir! 770 00:39:09,515 --> 00:39:10,816 Sergeant Bubba. 771 00:39:10,849 --> 00:39:13,585 Company, heel! 772 00:39:13,619 --> 00:39:16,021 Nice. 773 00:39:16,054 --> 00:39:18,824 All right, troops, Operation Gingham's a go! 774 00:39:18,857 --> 00:39:20,926 (chattering) 775 00:39:20,959 --> 00:39:23,395 (muffled) 776 00:39:30,001 --> 00:39:31,837 * Nap time 777 00:39:36,675 --> 00:39:38,810 (Munchkins chant) Hut, hut, hut, hut, hut, hut, hut, hut, 778 00:39:38,844 --> 00:39:40,912 hut, hut, hut, hut, hut, hut, hut, hut, 779 00:39:40,946 --> 00:39:43,749 hut, hut, hut, hut, hut, hut, hut, hut, hut. 780 00:39:43,782 --> 00:39:46,485 (* all sing muffled military cadence) 781 00:39:51,222 --> 00:39:52,924 * Nap time 782 00:39:52,958 --> 00:39:55,594 Oh, Dorothy, please don't be hurt. Wake up! 783 00:39:55,627 --> 00:39:57,663 OK, out of the way, peoples. Out of the way. 784 00:39:57,696 --> 00:39:59,598 It's time for Toto to give the mouth-to-mouth. 785 00:39:59,631 --> 00:40:01,767 I'll get the Dorothy, you get the lion, OK. 786 00:40:01,800 --> 00:40:05,103 Wait a minute! Wait a minute! I have a better idea. 787 00:40:05,136 --> 00:40:07,506 Charging! 788 00:40:07,539 --> 00:40:09,541 And clear! (beeping and buzzing) 789 00:40:12,978 --> 00:40:14,546 I'm up. I'm totally up! 790 00:40:14,580 --> 00:40:17,916 All right, she's alive. What happened? 791 00:40:17,949 --> 00:40:21,553 Well, it's lucky for you the Munchkins showed up. 792 00:40:21,587 --> 00:40:23,889 Thanks. I don't know what came over me. 793 00:40:23,922 --> 00:40:28,026 I'd say about maybe 20,000 volts there, Medusa. 794 00:40:28,059 --> 00:40:30,095 (yawns) 795 00:40:30,128 --> 00:40:31,897 Oh, big cat waking up, boys. Time to go. 796 00:40:31,930 --> 00:40:34,032 Good luck in Emerald City there, Giant Girl. 797 00:40:34,065 --> 00:40:37,002 (smacks lips) 798 00:40:37,035 --> 00:40:38,670 What'd I miss? 799 00:40:38,704 --> 00:40:40,939 Aah! 800 00:40:40,972 --> 00:40:43,675 (laughs) 801 00:40:43,709 --> 00:40:45,544 Very funny, guys. 802 00:40:45,577 --> 00:40:47,479 Next time you could at least tell me about my... 803 00:40:47,513 --> 00:40:49,748 (gasps) 804 00:40:49,781 --> 00:40:52,450 (Tin Thing) Emerald City! Look at it! 805 00:40:54,920 --> 00:40:56,888 It's so beautiful! 806 00:40:56,922 --> 00:40:58,890 And yet so terrifying all at the same time. 807 00:40:58,924 --> 00:41:01,860 Heh-heh. 808 00:41:01,893 --> 00:41:03,695 Wow. 809 00:41:06,064 --> 00:41:10,001 Well, this is the place. Whoa! 810 00:41:10,035 --> 00:41:13,872 We made it, Dorothy. Your dream's about to come true. 811 00:41:13,905 --> 00:41:16,575 OK, we agree now 812 00:41:16,608 --> 00:41:21,580 what happens in Emerald City stays in Emerald City, OK. 813 00:41:21,613 --> 00:41:24,616 (door opening) 814 00:41:44,936 --> 00:41:46,705 Can I help you? 815 00:41:46,738 --> 00:41:49,007 Hi. I'm Dorothy Gale, 816 00:41:49,040 --> 00:41:52,277 and we traveled all the way across Oz to see the wizard. 817 00:41:52,310 --> 00:41:56,181 Hmm... Dorothy Gale. Hmm... 818 00:41:56,214 --> 00:41:58,283 Nope. Not on the list. 819 00:41:58,316 --> 00:42:00,285 Are you sure? Check again. 820 00:42:02,588 --> 00:42:05,624 And who are you? 821 00:42:05,657 --> 00:42:07,626 We're friends of Dorothy. Right. 822 00:42:07,659 --> 00:42:11,663 Well, she's not on the list, so go away. 823 00:42:11,697 --> 00:42:13,131 Uh... 824 00:42:13,164 --> 00:42:15,601 Hold on a minute, big bird. Come here. Listen, listen. 825 00:42:15,634 --> 00:42:18,570 (guard) Huh. (whispering) 826 00:42:18,604 --> 00:42:20,105 Mm-hmm. Oh! 827 00:42:20,138 --> 00:42:24,209 Flattened by a double-wide? Oh! Oh! Oh! 828 00:42:24,242 --> 00:42:27,746 We don't want any trouble. Um... 829 00:42:27,779 --> 00:42:29,815 Oh, there's just been a cancellation. 830 00:42:29,848 --> 00:42:31,349 You may go in. 831 00:42:31,382 --> 00:42:34,552 Oh, great! (guard) Door! 832 00:43:07,352 --> 00:43:09,120 Weirdoes... (muffled whispering) 833 00:43:09,154 --> 00:43:11,389 Gale... (muffled whispering) double-wide... 834 00:43:11,422 --> 00:43:13,158 (clears throat) 835 00:43:13,191 --> 00:43:15,293 They're all yours, sir. 836 00:43:17,963 --> 00:43:21,366 Hello! Wait. You're the Wizard of Oz? 837 00:43:21,399 --> 00:43:26,337 Oh, no. I'm not the wizard. I'm Scooter. 838 00:43:26,371 --> 00:43:29,140 First assistant to the big man. 839 00:43:29,174 --> 00:43:31,209 Welcome, Dorothy. 840 00:43:31,242 --> 00:43:33,679 Why, we've heard a lot about you. 841 00:43:33,712 --> 00:43:36,081 You're all anyone's talking about. Ah! 842 00:43:36,114 --> 00:43:38,416 Really? Great! That's terrific! 843 00:43:38,449 --> 00:43:42,053 Yeah, but before the wizard can turn you into an overnight sensation, 844 00:43:42,087 --> 00:43:44,656 there are certain precautions that have to be taken. 845 00:43:44,690 --> 00:43:48,126 Precautions? Yup. Follow me. Come on. 846 00:43:48,159 --> 00:43:49,327 Let's go. Follow him. 847 00:43:49,360 --> 00:43:52,163 OK, here we are. Come on in. 848 00:43:52,197 --> 00:43:55,767 Oh, welcome to Emerald City, where the place is so bright, 849 00:43:55,801 --> 00:43:59,104 you've got to wear shades or your eyeballs will fry like a couple of eggs. 850 00:43:59,137 --> 00:44:01,840 (meeping) 851 00:44:01,873 --> 00:44:03,875 This spotlight here duplicates the brilliance of the wizard 852 00:44:03,909 --> 00:44:06,211 and his radiant wonderfulness. Radiant wonderfulness. 853 00:44:06,244 --> 00:44:09,414 Radiant wonderfulness. 854 00:44:09,447 --> 00:44:12,751 As you can see, thanks to my patented lenses, 855 00:44:12,784 --> 00:44:14,686 Beaker's retinas remain uncooked. 856 00:44:14,720 --> 00:44:16,822 (meeping) 857 00:44:16,855 --> 00:44:18,890 (meeps) 858 00:44:18,924 --> 00:44:21,159 And they will still protect his eyes 859 00:44:21,192 --> 00:44:22,694 even when the intensity is doubled. 860 00:44:22,728 --> 00:44:24,796 (meeps and yelps) 861 00:44:26,998 --> 00:44:28,466 Good grief! 862 00:44:28,499 --> 00:44:30,969 (scientist) OK, give me the glasses. 863 00:44:33,171 --> 00:44:36,842 (pop) (all gasp) 864 00:44:36,875 --> 00:44:39,845 So, do we get to see the wizard now? 865 00:44:39,878 --> 00:44:42,413 Oh, well, if you want to be the next big thing, 866 00:44:42,447 --> 00:44:45,050 you've got to look the part. 867 00:44:45,083 --> 00:44:49,087 Welcome to Emerald City's Magical Makeover Machine. 868 00:44:49,120 --> 00:44:51,289 Oh, wow. 869 00:44:51,322 --> 00:44:54,025 You want me to go in there? Absolutely. 870 00:44:54,059 --> 00:44:56,227 No way! You just fried that guy's head off. 871 00:44:56,261 --> 00:44:58,196 (whimpering) 872 00:45:02,100 --> 00:45:04,736 Well, you can't go see the wizard looking like that. 873 00:45:04,770 --> 00:45:07,739 I mean, what is that, a tablecloth? Check, please. 874 00:45:07,773 --> 00:45:10,475 (laughing) 875 00:45:10,508 --> 00:45:12,944 (all stop laughing) 876 00:45:14,813 --> 00:45:17,182 Fine. I'll get in your makeover machine. 877 00:45:21,052 --> 00:45:22,720 She's in. 878 00:45:26,224 --> 00:45:28,960 (Dorothy) Hey! What is that? 879 00:45:28,994 --> 00:45:30,929 Ow! 880 00:45:30,962 --> 00:45:32,898 Hey! 881 00:45:40,171 --> 00:45:42,240 This is cool. I can work with this. 882 00:45:42,273 --> 00:45:44,009 Look! You've been reborn! 883 00:45:44,042 --> 00:45:47,913 Correction - you've been Osbourne! (Scooter laughs) 884 00:45:47,946 --> 00:45:49,948 Good one. So, what do you guys think? 885 00:45:49,981 --> 00:45:53,251 Uh, well... It's really nice. It's nice. 886 00:45:53,284 --> 00:45:55,453 Different. Sí, sí. 887 00:45:55,486 --> 00:45:59,090 But you know, this is the Kelly Osbourne thing I think that you're doing, 888 00:45:59,124 --> 00:46:01,259 but I think we all thought you were going for more of 889 00:46:01,292 --> 00:46:04,295 the hot and sexy Ashanti thing. 890 00:46:04,329 --> 00:46:06,832 Ashanti. Ashanti, yeah. 891 00:46:06,865 --> 00:46:09,334 Fine. I'll get back in your stupid machine. 892 00:46:25,250 --> 00:46:26,852 (wolf whistle) 893 00:46:26,885 --> 00:46:28,019 Oh! 894 00:46:28,053 --> 00:46:30,989 Now you're talking, baby! Beautiful! 895 00:46:31,022 --> 00:46:33,959 What do you think? Oh, my! 896 00:46:36,928 --> 00:46:39,164 She's ready to see the wizard now. 897 00:46:39,197 --> 00:46:42,133 Come on! Follow me! Come on! 898 00:46:42,167 --> 00:46:44,535 All right. OK. Walk this way. Come on. 899 00:46:44,569 --> 00:46:47,105 Fabulous. Wow. 900 00:46:47,138 --> 00:46:49,440 (man) Who are those who seek an audience 901 00:46:49,474 --> 00:46:51,576 with the all-powerful Wizard of Oz? 902 00:46:51,609 --> 00:46:54,212 First, bring in the lion. 903 00:46:54,245 --> 00:46:57,248 The lion? Wait. Stop. Hold on. 904 00:46:57,282 --> 00:47:00,886 Wait, wait, wait! You heard him, Lion. You gotta go in first now. 905 00:47:15,300 --> 00:47:18,536 It's gonna be OK. It's gonna be OK. 906 00:47:21,272 --> 00:47:25,610 A wave of relaxation is flowing throughout your body. 907 00:47:25,643 --> 00:47:28,113 A feeling of peace and... 908 00:47:30,015 --> 00:47:32,183 Don't wet the floor! Don't wet the floor! 909 00:47:32,217 --> 00:47:35,486 Scooter, is there a bathroom? (door locks and Lion wails) 910 00:47:35,520 --> 00:47:37,455 Scooter? 911 00:47:41,192 --> 00:47:43,294 (Lion gasps) 912 00:47:47,665 --> 00:47:51,202 I am Oz, the great and terrible. 913 00:47:51,236 --> 00:47:55,073 Who are you, and why do you seek me? 914 00:47:55,106 --> 00:47:56,407 I... I... 915 00:47:56,441 --> 00:47:59,477 I wanna be a stand-up comedian. 916 00:47:59,510 --> 00:48:01,612 Really? Yes, sir. 917 00:48:01,646 --> 00:48:03,982 Well, then, tell me a joke. 918 00:48:04,015 --> 00:48:06,551 No, I-I-I can't do that. 919 00:48:06,584 --> 00:48:09,320 I... I... I have stage fright. 920 00:48:09,354 --> 00:48:11,222 I kind of lack courage in general, actually. 921 00:48:11,256 --> 00:48:14,960 Tell me a joke now! 922 00:48:14,993 --> 00:48:17,628 Aah! Why did the Wicked Witch throw a clock out the window to see time fly? 923 00:48:17,662 --> 00:48:21,166 No, wait, stop. I mean, when the witch had a clock and she threw it... 924 00:48:21,199 --> 00:48:24,269 Aah! Wacka, wacka! 925 00:48:24,302 --> 00:48:27,372 (sinister laugh) 926 00:48:27,405 --> 00:48:28,339 Next. 927 00:48:36,982 --> 00:48:41,219 I am Oz, the great and terrible. 928 00:48:41,252 --> 00:48:42,620 What do you want? 929 00:48:42,653 --> 00:48:45,957 (whimpers) Hi, there, Mr. Oz. Um... 930 00:48:45,991 --> 00:48:47,993 Are you, by chance, any relation to Frank Oz? 931 00:48:50,428 --> 00:48:51,997 Aah! 932 00:48:52,030 --> 00:48:55,266 I'll, uh, I'll take that as a no. Uh... 933 00:48:55,300 --> 00:48:59,304 Well, I'm here because I wanna ask you for a... I, uh... 934 00:48:59,337 --> 00:49:02,140 Hurry up, brainless. Oh! Oh! 935 00:49:02,173 --> 00:49:04,642 Yes, yes. A brain. That's right, a brain. 936 00:49:04,675 --> 00:49:08,379 I'd really love to have a brain. Uh... 937 00:49:08,413 --> 00:49:12,117 For my head. You know, the old noggin. 938 00:49:12,150 --> 00:49:13,518 You're fired. 939 00:49:15,320 --> 00:49:17,422 Aah! 940 00:49:17,455 --> 00:49:21,126 (laughing) 941 00:49:21,159 --> 00:49:22,227 Next. 942 00:49:27,698 --> 00:49:31,636 Well, hello. What is it you're looking for, 943 00:49:31,669 --> 00:49:36,241 tin, dark and handsome? 944 00:49:36,274 --> 00:49:38,509 Actually, I'm here looking for a heart. 945 00:49:38,543 --> 00:49:42,080 Oh, a heart. (giggles) 946 00:49:48,386 --> 00:49:51,556 Are you sure there isn't anything else I can do you for? 947 00:49:51,589 --> 00:49:53,524 No, no, no. You see, I already have a girlfriend. 948 00:49:53,558 --> 00:49:57,162 She's a chicken. Oh, a chicken, eh? 949 00:49:57,195 --> 00:49:59,664 Yeah. 950 00:49:59,697 --> 00:50:03,568 Well, does she have a big beak like this? 951 00:50:03,601 --> 00:50:05,203 How did you know? 952 00:50:05,236 --> 00:50:09,707 And does she have huge floppy wings like this? 953 00:50:09,740 --> 00:50:14,079 Look at the size of those wings. No, no, no, no, no. 954 00:50:14,112 --> 00:50:16,447 I'm not here for that. Um... uh... 955 00:50:16,481 --> 00:50:20,017 I've just come here to get a heart... (clucking) 956 00:50:23,221 --> 00:50:25,323 Whoo! Is it hot in here, or is it just me? 957 00:50:26,857 --> 00:50:28,293 Next! 958 00:50:30,695 --> 00:50:32,463 (screams) 959 00:50:34,565 --> 00:50:36,534 Bye-bye. 960 00:50:36,567 --> 00:50:39,637 That's it! What are you doing with my fr-- 961 00:50:39,670 --> 00:50:40,738 Whoa. 962 00:50:40,771 --> 00:50:43,808 What? No hello? 963 00:50:43,841 --> 00:50:48,213 Ooh! Aren't you the little girl who wanted to be a big star? 964 00:50:48,246 --> 00:50:51,749 Yeah. I heard that you were all-great and powerful, 965 00:50:51,782 --> 00:50:54,685 and I came all this way and I was kind of sort of hoping that maybe-- 966 00:50:54,719 --> 00:50:57,322 Blah-dee-blah. Let's just cut to the chase. 967 00:50:57,355 --> 00:50:59,724 I am prepared to give you all your heart desires - 968 00:50:59,757 --> 00:51:02,827 fame, hit records, 969 00:51:02,860 --> 00:51:05,796 and a tabloid story linking you romantically 970 00:51:05,830 --> 00:51:08,466 to the famous person of your choice. 971 00:51:08,499 --> 00:51:11,402 Really? Oh, God. So, what do I gotta do? 972 00:51:11,436 --> 00:51:14,339 Oh, nothing, really. 973 00:51:14,372 --> 00:51:20,545 Just bring me the Wicked Witch of the West's magic eye! 974 00:51:20,578 --> 00:51:23,248 Eye, eye... 975 00:51:23,281 --> 00:51:26,117 I'm sorry, the what? 976 00:51:26,151 --> 00:51:31,122 The Wicked Witch of the West's magic eye! Eye... 977 00:51:31,156 --> 00:51:33,291 Um... OK... 978 00:51:33,324 --> 00:51:35,160 the Wicked Witch of the West has this magic eye 979 00:51:35,193 --> 00:51:36,894 that gives her the power to see all in Oz. 980 00:51:36,927 --> 00:51:39,364 If you cross the mountains of death, 981 00:51:39,397 --> 00:51:41,799 remove her eye and bring it back to me, 982 00:51:41,832 --> 00:51:47,338 your wildest dreams shall come true. 983 00:51:47,372 --> 00:51:50,175 What about my friends? Brains, hearts, 984 00:51:50,208 --> 00:51:53,278 courage - done! If you bring me the eye. 985 00:51:53,311 --> 00:51:56,281 Jeez, you need anything else while we're there? A kidney or... 986 00:51:56,314 --> 00:51:58,383 Silence! 987 00:51:58,416 --> 00:52:01,352 That's the deal on the table. 988 00:52:01,386 --> 00:52:04,522 Now be gone from my sight! 989 00:52:09,194 --> 00:52:12,663 Ooh. Ooh. 990 00:52:12,697 --> 00:52:15,366 Uh... (clears throat) 991 00:52:15,400 --> 00:52:18,369 Um... This is embarrassing. 992 00:52:18,403 --> 00:52:22,740 Um... Would you mind, um... 993 00:52:22,773 --> 00:52:25,576 jumping? 994 00:52:26,877 --> 00:52:29,414 Uh... in there? 995 00:52:29,447 --> 00:52:33,184 Yeah. If you wouldn't mind. 996 00:52:33,218 --> 00:52:36,187 I guess. 997 00:52:36,221 --> 00:52:38,489 (screams) 998 00:52:38,523 --> 00:52:41,759 Excuse me. Are you busy? 999 00:52:41,792 --> 00:52:44,262 Uh... I thought she'd never leave, OK. 1000 00:52:44,295 --> 00:52:48,399 So for me, I would like a date with JLo, of course. 1001 00:52:48,433 --> 00:52:51,402 Nothing too serious. Maybe a little something between marriages. 1002 00:52:51,436 --> 00:52:52,703 (roars) 1003 00:52:52,737 --> 00:52:54,339 Aah! 1004 00:52:54,372 --> 00:52:55,873 (laughs) 1005 00:52:55,906 --> 00:52:57,375 (banging and screaming) 1006 00:52:57,408 --> 00:52:59,577 Do you guys hear something? Santa Maria! 1007 00:53:04,515 --> 00:53:06,917 Oh, dear. Oh, gracias, gracias. 1008 00:53:06,951 --> 00:53:08,919 Hey, good news, everyone. 1009 00:53:08,953 --> 00:53:11,856 The wizard is going to grant all our wishes, OK! 1010 00:53:11,889 --> 00:53:14,292 Yes! Yes! 1011 00:53:14,325 --> 00:53:16,427 Yes, that's great! Toto, I think I should tell 'em... 1012 00:53:16,461 --> 00:53:19,664 And all we have to do is cross the mountains of death, 1013 00:53:19,697 --> 00:53:22,567 poke out the Wicked Witch's eye and give it to the wizard! 1014 00:53:28,473 --> 00:53:30,508 It could happen. 1015 00:53:32,377 --> 00:53:33,611 (wild dogs howling) 1016 00:53:33,644 --> 00:53:35,513 Stupid wizard. 1017 00:53:35,546 --> 00:53:38,583 Make us climb the stupid mountains to find the stupid witch. 1018 00:53:38,616 --> 00:53:41,919 Yeah! And I was very clear about being a cowardly lion. 1019 00:53:41,952 --> 00:53:43,921 Mm-hmm. 1020 00:53:43,954 --> 00:53:45,756 I didn't know I'd have to do something like this 1021 00:53:45,790 --> 00:53:47,892 to become a famous singer. 1022 00:53:47,925 --> 00:53:49,894 I'm starting to think maybe being a star 1023 00:53:49,927 --> 00:53:51,696 isn't all it's cracked up to be. 1024 00:53:51,729 --> 00:53:53,864 Wait a second. Dorothy, 1025 00:53:53,898 --> 00:53:57,268 you know you'll always be a star with us, right? 1026 00:53:57,302 --> 00:54:00,738 Thanks. I never thought I'd say it, Scarecrow, 1027 00:54:00,771 --> 00:54:04,775 but Kansas never looked so good. 1028 00:54:04,809 --> 00:54:08,313 I miss home. I miss my family. (sobbing) 1029 00:54:08,346 --> 00:54:10,315 OK, OK. Boo-hoo, boo-hoo, OK. 1030 00:54:10,348 --> 00:54:14,385 I live in a stinking algae-covered fishbowl in a trailer park, OK. 1031 00:54:14,419 --> 00:54:15,920 We're going to poke the witch in the eye. 1032 00:54:15,953 --> 00:54:19,324 End of story. 1033 00:54:19,357 --> 00:54:22,293 Wah, wah, wah. Poor me, poor me. You guys are pathetic, OK. 1034 00:54:24,762 --> 00:54:26,631 (Toto) Let's talk about something else, OK? 1035 00:54:26,664 --> 00:54:29,600 'Cause there's an amazing coincidence happening here. 1036 00:54:29,634 --> 00:54:32,970 It's incredible, really. When you think about it, it blows the mind. 1037 00:54:33,003 --> 00:54:36,607 Kansas - '80s band. Toto - '80s band. 1038 00:54:36,641 --> 00:54:38,409 We're on a "Journey" - '80s band. 1039 00:54:38,443 --> 00:54:41,078 (witch) What have we here? Intruders? 1040 00:54:41,111 --> 00:54:44,081 ...'80s band. Oh, and when we see the witch - 1041 00:54:44,114 --> 00:54:46,551 "Wham!" - '80s band, OK. 1042 00:54:46,584 --> 00:54:49,554 (witch) And what's this? I can't believe my own evil eye! 1043 00:54:49,587 --> 00:54:51,456 How did she get the silver shoes? 1044 00:54:51,489 --> 00:54:53,858 I'm next in line to have 'em. 1045 00:54:53,891 --> 00:54:56,394 Sal... 1046 00:54:56,427 --> 00:54:58,663 Stupid dog. Sal, you gotta be kidding me. 1047 00:54:58,696 --> 00:55:00,531 You're not done yet? 1048 00:55:00,565 --> 00:55:03,868 I'm sorry. Why can't we just use regular water? 1049 00:55:03,901 --> 00:55:06,371 (gibbers) 1050 00:55:06,404 --> 00:55:09,607 All you need to know is that the witch's delicate diva pigskin 1051 00:55:09,640 --> 00:55:11,676 can only handle the nice bottled stuff. 1052 00:55:11,709 --> 00:55:14,445 And, confidentially, it ain't helping her. 1053 00:55:14,479 --> 00:55:16,080 (laughter) 1054 00:55:16,113 --> 00:55:19,083 (barking) (sighs) 1055 00:55:19,116 --> 00:55:21,619 Oh, hiya, sweetheart. I just finished your bottled-water bath. 1056 00:55:21,652 --> 00:55:25,055 Cancel it. Change of plans. I've just discovered some new talent 1057 00:55:25,089 --> 00:55:27,358 and it's right in our own backyard. 1058 00:55:27,392 --> 00:55:30,361 Isn't that right, poo-poo kiss? 1059 00:55:30,395 --> 00:55:34,098 That's wonderful. Hey, maybe you two could sing a duet. Hmm? 1060 00:55:34,131 --> 00:55:36,066 A do what? A do what? 1061 00:55:36,100 --> 00:55:38,703 What are you talking about, duets? She flies solo, Sal. 1062 00:55:38,736 --> 00:55:40,538 Right, sugar patch? 1063 00:55:40,571 --> 00:55:42,607 If I want those silver shoes, 1064 00:55:42,640 --> 00:55:44,609 I'll have to pry 'em off her cold, dead carcass. 1065 00:55:44,642 --> 00:55:45,876 (barks) 1066 00:55:45,910 --> 00:55:47,745 What's that? 1067 00:55:47,778 --> 00:55:49,880 You want one of her bones when I'm done with her? 1068 00:55:49,914 --> 00:55:53,117 Oh, yes, of course, dear. Yes! 1069 00:55:53,150 --> 00:55:54,985 Bring me the magic silver whistle. 1070 00:55:55,019 --> 00:55:59,390 The man-eating wolves are going to have an early supper tonight. 1071 00:55:59,424 --> 00:56:01,058 (cackles) 1072 00:56:04,429 --> 00:56:06,130 Pardon me, please. Yeah. 1073 00:56:06,163 --> 00:56:10,100 The, uh... the man-eating wolves are on a, um ... 1074 00:56:10,134 --> 00:56:12,002 ski vacation. 1075 00:56:12,036 --> 00:56:13,671 Oh. 1076 00:56:13,704 --> 00:56:16,841 Well, then bring me the magic trumpet of death. 1077 00:56:16,874 --> 00:56:20,177 I will send in the crows of despair instead. 1078 00:56:20,210 --> 00:56:22,046 (cackles) 1079 00:56:22,079 --> 00:56:25,483 The crows of despair are at a wedding. 1080 00:56:25,516 --> 00:56:27,552 Yeah. Huh? 1081 00:56:27,585 --> 00:56:29,687 Angry bees? Stomach flu. 1082 00:56:29,720 --> 00:56:31,522 Vicious squirrels? It's nut season. 1083 00:56:31,556 --> 00:56:33,891 Blood-thirsty cockatoos? Religious holiday. 1084 00:56:33,924 --> 00:56:34,992 (sighs) 1085 00:56:35,025 --> 00:56:39,564 All right. Bring me my enchanted biker cap... again! 1086 00:56:41,866 --> 00:56:43,568 Round up the flying monkeys. 1087 00:56:43,601 --> 00:56:46,170 There's only room for one diva in Oz, 1088 00:56:46,203 --> 00:56:48,138 and that's moi! 1089 00:56:48,172 --> 00:56:50,641 (* hums dramatic music) 1090 00:56:53,210 --> 00:56:55,813 Hah. Ahem. 1091 00:56:55,846 --> 00:56:58,816 All right, guys, quit shoving. Front and center. 1092 00:57:02,219 --> 00:57:04,589 The flying monkeys are ready to go, boss. 1093 00:57:04,622 --> 00:57:07,625 Fabulous. I want the girl caught and captured. 1094 00:57:07,658 --> 00:57:10,928 If she resists... destroy her. 1095 00:57:10,961 --> 00:57:14,499 Really? Knock off a girl? (witch laughs) 1096 00:57:14,532 --> 00:57:17,602 I-I-I'm sorry. What do you see on my head? 1097 00:57:17,635 --> 00:57:20,905 (all) Enchanted biker cap. 1098 00:57:20,938 --> 00:57:22,973 And what does it mean? 1099 00:57:23,007 --> 00:57:26,076 Your wish is our command. 1100 00:57:26,110 --> 00:57:28,078 Good. And gas up my ride, too. 1101 00:57:28,112 --> 00:57:30,881 I wanna make sure you knot-heads don't screw up. 1102 00:57:30,915 --> 00:57:33,217 All right, you mugs. Come on, let's go! 1103 00:57:35,052 --> 00:57:37,087 (yelps) 1104 00:57:37,121 --> 00:57:40,658 (* monkeys hum "The Ride of the Valkyries") 1105 00:57:50,067 --> 00:57:51,502 (sighs) 1106 00:57:56,674 --> 00:57:58,509 The witch! 1107 00:58:08,853 --> 00:58:10,921 Slow down, slow down, slow down, slow down! 1108 00:58:10,955 --> 00:58:12,890 Back it up. 1109 00:58:26,003 --> 00:58:27,772 Well, well, well. 1110 00:58:27,805 --> 00:58:30,841 Looks like someone forgot to take out the trash. 1111 00:58:30,875 --> 00:58:34,044 Trash? Pretty big talk coming from a hog on a hog. 1112 00:58:34,078 --> 00:58:35,646 (laughter) 1113 00:58:41,351 --> 00:58:44,021 Ha-ha-ha. Oh, so clever. Such wit. 1114 00:58:44,054 --> 00:58:46,056 I know your type, missy. 1115 00:58:46,090 --> 00:58:49,293 You sweet young things come in with stars in your eyes, 1116 00:58:49,326 --> 00:58:52,096 ready to show the world what you've got. 1117 00:58:52,129 --> 00:58:55,633 Well, now it's time to clear the stage for the real talent, 1118 00:58:55,666 --> 00:58:59,203 'cause the diva gig's a killer... and so am I. 1119 00:58:59,236 --> 00:59:02,139 Hey, you can't talk to my friend like that. 1120 00:59:02,172 --> 00:59:04,241 Oh, yeah? And who's gonna stop me? 1121 00:59:05,643 --> 00:59:06,644 Um... 1122 00:59:09,113 --> 00:59:11,015 He will. Uh... 1123 00:59:11,048 --> 00:59:13,918 Boo! 1124 00:59:13,951 --> 00:59:16,120 It never really worked on the crows either. 1125 00:59:16,153 --> 00:59:17,988 Capture the girl and the fur ball. 1126 00:59:18,022 --> 00:59:20,157 I'm in the mood for lion nuggets. 1127 00:59:20,190 --> 00:59:23,861 As for the others, shred 'em to pieces. 1128 00:59:23,894 --> 00:59:25,963 But why? They've done nothing to you. 1129 00:59:25,996 --> 00:59:28,098 Why, you ask? Why? 1130 00:59:28,132 --> 00:59:30,735 I'll tell you why, in a song. 1131 00:59:30,768 --> 00:59:33,070 Hit it! 1132 00:59:34,872 --> 00:59:37,908 Um... 1133 00:59:37,942 --> 00:59:40,310 Hmm. Nice digs. 1134 00:59:40,344 --> 00:59:42,079 You're late! 1135 00:59:42,112 --> 00:59:45,015 You know, like, not everyone has groovy flying motorbikes, OK? 1136 00:59:45,049 --> 00:59:47,051 Not my problem. 1137 00:59:47,084 --> 00:59:50,655 Yeah, we've been driving the same lousy bus since 1978. 1138 00:59:50,688 --> 00:59:53,023 We'll talk about it later! 1139 00:59:53,057 --> 00:59:54,859 I... Later! 1140 00:59:56,961 --> 00:59:58,328 (grunting) 1141 00:59:58,362 --> 00:59:59,697 Ah! 1142 00:59:59,730 --> 01:00:01,265 (grunting) 1143 01:00:04,802 --> 01:00:07,838 Get, get, get! Sorry! 1144 01:00:07,872 --> 01:00:10,007 (yelling and crashing) 1145 01:00:14,278 --> 01:00:17,915 Ready! Hit it! 1146 01:00:17,948 --> 01:00:21,385 * Maybe I need to spell it out, Dorothy Gale 1147 01:00:21,418 --> 01:00:25,823 * This is my show Sorry, you fail 1148 01:00:25,856 --> 01:00:28,993 * There's only room for one rock goddess in Oz 1149 01:00:29,026 --> 01:00:30,427 * You've lost your bloom 1150 01:00:30,460 --> 01:00:33,130 * Poor thing, already a "was" 1151 01:00:33,163 --> 01:00:37,702 * Pay attention Listen to moi 1152 01:00:37,735 --> 01:00:41,806 * This TV special is mine, comme ça? 1153 01:00:41,839 --> 01:00:45,876 * So you can leave the silver shoes at the door 1154 01:00:45,910 --> 01:00:48,913 * 'Cause the diva's got the floor Look out! 1155 01:00:48,946 --> 01:00:52,082 * The witch is in the house 1156 01:00:52,116 --> 01:00:55,152 * The witch is in the house * The witch is in the house 1157 01:00:55,185 --> 01:00:58,889 * She's hot The witch is in the house 1158 01:00:58,923 --> 01:01:01,692 * This is my scene, this is my set 1159 01:01:03,227 --> 01:01:05,730 * I may be gorgeous 1160 01:01:05,763 --> 01:01:07,197 * But I'm bad as they get * She's hot 1161 01:01:07,231 --> 01:01:10,768 * You better run 'cause you ain't seen nothing yet 1162 01:01:10,801 --> 01:01:12,336 * Watch out 1163 01:01:12,369 --> 01:01:15,773 * The witch is in the house 1164 01:01:15,806 --> 01:01:19,810 * Remember, missy, the eye sees all 1165 01:01:19,844 --> 01:01:22,847 * Time to get down on your knees and crawl 1166 01:01:22,880 --> 01:01:24,381 * You better stop 1167 01:01:24,414 --> 01:01:27,885 * You're gonna scream and shout 1168 01:01:27,918 --> 01:01:30,788 * 'Cause mama's gonna knock you out 1169 01:01:30,821 --> 01:01:33,290 * The witch is in the house 1170 01:01:33,323 --> 01:01:37,394 * The crazy, kooky house * The witch is in the house 1171 01:01:37,427 --> 01:01:40,497 * The witch is in the house 1172 01:01:40,530 --> 01:01:44,168 * I don't forgive, I never forget 1173 01:01:44,201 --> 01:01:49,073 * Think you can drop another house on my head? 1174 01:01:49,106 --> 01:01:52,142 * You're gonna wish that you were already dead 1175 01:01:52,176 --> 01:01:55,379 * Watch out The witch is in the house 1176 01:01:57,882 --> 01:02:00,785 * On a good day 1177 01:02:00,818 --> 01:02:04,488 * I'll have you begging for mercy * Mercy me 1178 01:02:04,521 --> 01:02:07,091 And let me tell ya, when she comes home at night... Oh, excuse me. 1179 01:02:07,124 --> 01:02:08,926 * On a bad day 1180 01:02:08,959 --> 01:02:11,061 * I'll make you wish you were never born 1181 01:02:11,095 --> 01:02:14,431 * As I insult your wardrobe, causing you such pain and humiliation 1182 01:02:14,464 --> 01:02:16,400 * That you scream from the depth of your soul 1183 01:02:16,433 --> 01:02:18,302 * As your eyes roll back into your head Eyes! 1184 01:02:18,335 --> 01:02:21,238 * And your toenails carve grooves into my Italian marble floor 1185 01:02:21,271 --> 01:02:23,507 Marble! (laughs) 1186 01:02:23,540 --> 01:02:25,910 But I digress. Digress. 1187 01:02:25,943 --> 01:02:28,178 Two, three, four! Get 'em, boys! 1188 01:02:28,212 --> 01:02:31,048 Come to Papa. 1189 01:02:31,081 --> 01:02:33,450 (screaming) 1190 01:02:36,586 --> 01:02:39,089 I'll stop 'em. 1191 01:02:39,123 --> 01:02:41,258 (screaming) 1192 01:02:45,229 --> 01:02:46,997 (alarm) 1193 01:02:53,838 --> 01:02:56,073 (monkeys) * Eye, eye, eye, eye, eye 1194 01:02:56,106 --> 01:02:57,541 * The eye, oh, no 1195 01:02:57,574 --> 01:03:00,911 * The eye, eye, eye, eye The eye sees all 1196 01:03:00,945 --> 01:03:02,813 * The eye, eye, eye, eye 1197 01:03:02,847 --> 01:03:05,983 * Here comes the eye 1198 01:03:06,016 --> 01:03:08,285 * The witch is in the house 1199 01:03:08,318 --> 01:03:11,822 * The witch is in the house 1200 01:03:11,856 --> 01:03:13,924 * Eye, eye, eye, eye * The witch is in the house 1201 01:03:13,958 --> 01:03:15,893 (witch) * Now give it up, I'm taking the shoes 1202 01:03:15,926 --> 01:03:19,964 * Audition's over and this time you lose 1203 01:03:19,997 --> 01:03:22,933 * Look for all the gory details on the ten o'clock news 1204 01:03:22,967 --> 01:03:24,301 * Watch out 1205 01:03:24,334 --> 01:03:26,837 * The witch is in the house 1206 01:03:26,871 --> 01:03:29,306 Watch out! The witch is in the house. 1207 01:03:33,177 --> 01:03:35,212 (revs engine) 1208 01:03:35,245 --> 01:03:37,281 (tires screech) 1209 01:03:37,314 --> 01:03:41,018 (Toto) Hey! I can't see! 1210 01:03:41,051 --> 01:03:44,321 I'm going to hyperventilate, OK. I can't even see, OK. 1211 01:03:44,354 --> 01:03:46,190 I'm going to hyperventilate. 1212 01:03:50,027 --> 01:03:52,296 Whoo-hoo! Nice meeting ya, fellas! 1213 01:03:52,329 --> 01:03:54,631 Too bad you went to pieces on us! 1214 01:03:54,664 --> 01:03:56,400 (laughs) 1215 01:04:14,051 --> 01:04:16,186 Sal, let's go, let's go. Come on. Time is money, huh? 1216 01:04:16,220 --> 01:04:20,925 We're on the air in three, two... 1217 01:04:20,958 --> 01:04:22,592 Bonjour! 1218 01:04:22,626 --> 01:04:26,030 Witch of the West coming at you from my lair of evil. 1219 01:04:26,063 --> 01:04:29,133 Good news, fans. In order to keep up with the Joneses, 1220 01:04:29,166 --> 01:04:33,203 I've decided to lend my talent to reality television. 1221 01:04:33,237 --> 01:04:35,605 Today, you'll see me do my hair, 1222 01:04:35,639 --> 01:04:38,108 take my daily bottled-water bath, 1223 01:04:38,142 --> 01:04:40,410 and as an added bonus... 1224 01:04:43,413 --> 01:04:45,582 I'll try on some awesome footwear 1225 01:04:45,615 --> 01:04:48,953 that will help me totally rule all of Oz. 1226 01:04:48,986 --> 01:04:50,520 I'm never giving you my shoes, Witch! 1227 01:04:50,554 --> 01:04:52,522 We'll see about that, won't we? 1228 01:04:58,128 --> 01:04:59,329 (Witch) Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha! 1229 01:04:59,363 --> 01:05:02,699 Why me? I don't have the magic shoes! Why me? 1230 01:05:02,732 --> 01:05:04,568 (cries) 1231 01:05:04,601 --> 01:05:08,138 So, Dorothy, any last words 1232 01:05:08,172 --> 01:05:11,942 before suffering the agony of... 1233 01:05:11,976 --> 01:05:13,944 "de-feat"? 1234 01:05:13,978 --> 01:05:16,113 Wait, wait! Hold that! Wait, that's a great pun, honey. 1235 01:05:16,146 --> 01:05:17,647 (Toto screams) 1236 01:05:17,681 --> 01:05:19,083 Ow! 1237 01:05:19,116 --> 01:05:21,585 Ow! Why are you poking me? 1238 01:05:21,618 --> 01:05:24,354 We're tenderizing you so you taste better! 1239 01:05:24,388 --> 01:05:26,223 Oh, well, then... (laughter) 1240 01:05:30,294 --> 01:05:33,463 He screamed good that time. Are you sure you want to eat me? 1241 01:05:33,497 --> 01:05:35,632 After all, I am a stand-up comic. 1242 01:05:35,665 --> 01:05:37,601 So? So? 1243 01:05:37,634 --> 01:05:40,137 You should never eat the comedian. They taste funny. 1244 01:05:40,170 --> 01:05:42,172 Ha! 1245 01:05:42,206 --> 01:05:46,076 Was that supposed to be a joke? Yes. 1246 01:05:46,110 --> 01:05:49,313 But seriously, it must be tough being a flying monkey, right? 1247 01:05:49,346 --> 01:05:52,216 Hey, you know why your motorbikes won't stand up on their own? 1248 01:05:52,249 --> 01:05:55,085 They're two-tired! Wacka, wacka! 1249 01:05:55,119 --> 01:05:56,586 (moans) 1250 01:05:58,655 --> 01:05:59,689 (laughter) 1251 01:05:59,723 --> 01:06:02,993 The motorbike has two tires! 1252 01:06:03,027 --> 01:06:06,030 Two tires! (laughs) 1253 01:06:06,063 --> 01:06:07,364 It's funny on many levels. 1254 01:06:12,036 --> 01:06:14,438 (gibbers) 1255 01:06:17,307 --> 01:06:19,109 Dorothy. 1256 01:06:19,143 --> 01:06:21,345 Before I die, just once, 1257 01:06:21,378 --> 01:06:23,513 I want to hear a woman say she loves me, OK? 1258 01:06:23,547 --> 01:06:26,516 Oh, Toto. That's so sweet. 1259 01:06:26,550 --> 01:06:28,718 Of course I love you. 1260 01:06:28,752 --> 01:06:32,389 Uh... Look, Dorothy, I'm flattered, OK. 1261 01:06:32,422 --> 01:06:35,025 But I can't commit myself to just one womens, OK. 1262 01:06:35,059 --> 01:06:36,593 I hope we can still be friends. 1263 01:06:36,626 --> 01:06:38,162 But you just told me to tell you-- Sí, sí, sí. 1264 01:06:38,195 --> 01:06:39,729 I know you're feeling hurt. I understand. 1265 01:06:39,763 --> 01:06:42,632 But time and a razor-sharp blade cutting into your leg 1266 01:06:42,666 --> 01:06:45,001 will help you forget all about me, OK. 1267 01:06:48,138 --> 01:06:50,440 Oh, the womens. 1268 01:06:50,474 --> 01:06:52,509 Oh, the razor blades. 1269 01:06:55,145 --> 01:06:57,314 (screams) 1270 01:06:57,347 --> 01:07:00,050 (laughter) 1271 01:07:00,084 --> 01:07:03,053 Hey, who here likes comedy magic tricks? Ooh, I do! 1272 01:07:03,087 --> 01:07:04,721 OK! 1273 01:07:04,754 --> 01:07:07,157 I will need some keys. 1274 01:07:07,191 --> 01:07:10,794 Like those used to open cages. 1275 01:07:10,827 --> 01:07:13,230 Who's got the keys? Sweetums has the keys. 1276 01:07:13,263 --> 01:07:16,400 Will these keys do for your comedy magic act? 1277 01:07:16,433 --> 01:07:19,503 Ah, they're perfect! Thank you! You're welcome. 1278 01:07:19,536 --> 01:07:21,705 OK, now everybody close your eyes 1279 01:07:21,738 --> 01:07:23,407 and put your hands on the floor. 1280 01:07:26,176 --> 01:07:31,381 Now, say the magic words, "owah tafoo lyam," four times. 1281 01:07:31,415 --> 01:07:35,719 (all) Owah tafoo lyam. 1282 01:07:35,752 --> 01:07:39,523 Owah tafoo lyam. 1283 01:07:39,556 --> 01:07:43,127 Owah tafoo lyam. 1284 01:07:43,160 --> 01:07:46,296 Owah tafoo lyam. 1285 01:07:51,135 --> 01:07:52,402 He's gone! He's gone! 1286 01:07:52,436 --> 01:07:54,438 That's comedy and magic! Yeah! 1287 01:07:58,208 --> 01:08:01,378 OK, big dramatic ending, babe. Here it comes. 1288 01:08:01,411 --> 01:08:03,213 Wait for it. 1289 01:08:04,848 --> 01:08:07,151 Hey, what are you doing, Johnny? Hmm? 1290 01:08:07,184 --> 01:08:09,553 Oh, I just got this jacket cleaned. OK. 1291 01:08:12,256 --> 01:08:14,124 I'll save you! Lion! 1292 01:08:14,158 --> 01:08:15,825 Whoa! Oh, gosh. 1293 01:08:15,859 --> 01:08:19,363 Don't just stand there - get him! I am getting him. 1294 01:08:19,396 --> 01:08:21,565 In a nice wide shot with you in the foreground. 1295 01:08:21,598 --> 01:08:22,566 Oh, good. Nice. 1296 01:08:22,599 --> 01:08:24,268 Hi, Mom! 1297 01:08:24,301 --> 01:08:26,403 Excuse me, could I trouble you to kill someone for me? 1298 01:08:26,436 --> 01:08:28,372 OK. (growls) Thank you. 1299 01:08:30,607 --> 01:08:33,143 (screams) 1300 01:08:36,746 --> 01:08:39,783 Whoa! 1301 01:08:39,816 --> 01:08:43,587 * Calling all Munchkins, let's do lunchkins, uh... * 1302 01:08:43,620 --> 01:08:46,156 Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on come on. 1303 01:08:46,190 --> 01:08:49,259 What took you so long? (Lion) Oh, ow! Oh! 1304 01:08:51,195 --> 01:08:53,163 It's hot. Let's get this. 1305 01:08:54,831 --> 01:08:57,767 That tickled. Take that. You're ticklish? 1306 01:08:57,801 --> 01:09:01,805 The big lug's ticklish! (laughs and groans) 1307 01:09:01,838 --> 01:09:04,908 Tickle, tickle, tickle! 1308 01:09:04,941 --> 01:09:07,577 All right, Alpha Team, Crustacean emancipation. 1309 01:09:07,611 --> 01:09:11,181 Delta Team, come with me. Disengage Dorothy. 1310 01:09:11,215 --> 01:09:13,850 All right, team leaders, isolate and secure these silver shoes. 1311 01:09:13,883 --> 01:09:16,420 (witch) No! 1312 01:09:16,453 --> 01:09:19,289 You know, you're a pest. Munchkin, actually. 1313 01:09:19,323 --> 01:09:21,391 And you know what I do to pests? 1314 01:09:21,425 --> 01:09:25,262 Well, you welcome us as part of an unconventional multispecies family? 1315 01:09:25,295 --> 01:09:28,632 I kill pests! Until they're dead! 1316 01:09:28,665 --> 01:09:30,367 (choking) 1317 01:09:34,704 --> 01:09:36,773 Check it out. Your little show's about to be canceled. 1318 01:09:36,806 --> 01:09:38,975 All right, Gale. 1319 01:09:39,008 --> 01:09:41,645 This ends now, once and for all. 1320 01:09:41,678 --> 01:09:43,580 Bring it! Let's go! 1321 01:09:43,613 --> 01:09:44,814 It's on! I'm ready! 1322 01:09:44,848 --> 01:09:47,284 Come with it. I... 1323 01:09:47,317 --> 01:09:49,986 You... 1324 01:09:50,019 --> 01:09:52,689 I'm out. Let's just fight now. Hiiii... 1325 01:09:52,722 --> 01:09:55,825 Uh-oh. Somebody's gonna get witch-slapped. We're outta here, boys. 1326 01:09:55,859 --> 01:09:57,627 ...iii... 1327 01:09:57,661 --> 01:10:00,697 And then, just as Dorothy and the Wicked Witch 1328 01:10:00,730 --> 01:10:02,632 charge at each other... Bam! 1329 01:10:02,666 --> 01:10:04,801 Blowout fight scene. 1330 01:10:04,834 --> 01:10:09,673 The gals whip out these huge samurai swords, 1331 01:10:09,706 --> 01:10:12,242 and they just tear it up. 1332 01:10:12,276 --> 01:10:15,512 I'm talking kung fu! (whimpers) 1333 01:10:15,545 --> 01:10:17,781 I'm talking walking on walls! 1334 01:10:17,814 --> 01:10:21,418 I'm talking explosions everywhere! 1335 01:10:21,451 --> 01:10:23,487 (explosions) (whimpers) 1336 01:10:23,520 --> 01:10:26,756 I'm talking Oz in flames! 1337 01:10:26,790 --> 01:10:29,826 Burn, baby, burn! 1338 01:10:29,859 --> 01:10:32,729 You digging it? Uh... Yeah... 1339 01:10:32,762 --> 01:10:35,332 That sounds a bit violent for a family film. 1340 01:10:35,365 --> 01:10:37,534 OK. Cool, cool. OK. 1341 01:10:37,567 --> 01:10:40,370 We pull back on the fight scene. 1342 01:10:40,404 --> 01:10:44,574 No explosions, no "burn, baby, burn." 1343 01:10:44,608 --> 01:10:45,942 Mm-hmm. 1344 01:10:45,975 --> 01:10:48,378 All right, you know, less kung fu. Yeah, yeah. 1345 01:10:48,412 --> 01:10:50,580 But instead, what we have... 1346 01:10:50,614 --> 01:10:52,316 Are you ready? You ready? Yeah. 1347 01:10:52,349 --> 01:10:55,051 Morphing. Morphing? 1348 01:10:55,084 --> 01:10:57,721 Morphing. Crazy morphing! 1349 01:10:57,754 --> 01:11:01,825 We're talking Piggy transforming into Gonzo. 1350 01:11:01,858 --> 01:11:04,961 Mutating into Scooter. 1351 01:11:04,994 --> 01:11:09,533 Scooter turning into a big, busty vampire vixen 1352 01:11:09,566 --> 01:11:14,871 who explodes in a sea of crimson blood! 1353 01:11:14,904 --> 01:11:17,674 All done in the classic Japanese anime style, you know, like, for the kids. 1354 01:11:17,707 --> 01:11:20,977 I... yeah. Sounds... expensive. 1355 01:11:21,010 --> 01:11:24,314 OK, OK. Uh... Think, think, think, 1356 01:11:24,348 --> 01:11:26,583 think, think, think, think, think, think, think. 1357 01:11:26,616 --> 01:11:29,653 I can work with this - don't worry. Think, think... 1358 01:11:29,686 --> 01:11:32,088 I got it. 1359 01:11:32,121 --> 01:11:36,526 Dorothy big, bad Dorothy 1360 01:11:36,560 --> 01:11:38,528 goes to kick the Wicked Witch... 1361 01:11:38,562 --> 01:11:39,696 Are you ready? Yeah. 1362 01:11:39,729 --> 01:11:41,798 You ready for this? Here it comes! Yes, yes! 1363 01:11:41,831 --> 01:11:44,701 ...in the face! 1364 01:11:44,734 --> 01:11:48,538 Oh, now, that we can afford! Yes! 1365 01:11:48,572 --> 01:11:50,574 Hiiii... 1366 01:11:55,144 --> 01:11:57,381 ...ya! 1367 01:12:01,451 --> 01:12:03,953 Hii-ya to you, too! 1368 01:12:05,855 --> 01:12:08,692 That all you got? A bottled-water bath? 1369 01:12:08,725 --> 01:12:11,761 What's next? A deadly pedicure? 1370 01:12:11,795 --> 01:12:13,930 (laughing) 1371 01:12:13,963 --> 01:12:17,901 Why am I itching? What kind of water is this? 1372 01:12:17,934 --> 01:12:19,035 Oh. Oh, I... 1373 01:12:19,068 --> 01:12:21,838 We most definitely filled it up with bottled water. 1374 01:12:21,871 --> 01:12:24,040 Ain't that right, Sal? Oh, yeah. Right, Johnny. 1375 01:12:24,073 --> 01:12:26,410 100 percent. Ain't that right, Angel Marie? 1376 01:12:26,443 --> 01:12:29,679 Oh, uh... well, when we ran out of that stuff, 1377 01:12:29,713 --> 01:12:31,581 I topped her off with a hose. 1378 01:12:31,615 --> 01:12:35,385 What? I told you to use only bottled water! 1379 01:12:35,419 --> 01:12:37,454 Oh, no! Oopsy. 1380 01:12:37,487 --> 01:12:40,089 What a horrible way to... My bad. 1381 01:12:40,123 --> 01:12:42,826 I'm not melting. I'm getting skinny! 1382 01:12:42,859 --> 01:12:45,028 Oh! I'm getting skinny! 1383 01:12:45,061 --> 01:12:47,564 (singsong) * Ha ha ha ha ha! I win! I win! 1384 01:12:48,965 --> 01:12:50,634 What? 1385 01:12:52,902 --> 01:12:54,671 Oh, nuts. 1386 01:12:54,704 --> 01:12:56,506 No! 1387 01:12:57,974 --> 01:13:00,877 (screams) 1388 01:13:02,712 --> 01:13:03,747 (snorts) 1389 01:13:03,780 --> 01:13:06,182 (bell) 1390 01:13:06,215 --> 01:13:09,553 Uh... should I cut? 1391 01:13:09,586 --> 01:13:11,821 What? What? Yeah, cut. 1392 01:13:11,855 --> 01:13:13,723 Whoa! Hey! 1393 01:13:13,757 --> 01:13:17,026 Fabulous performance, darling. Fabulous! That's incredible! 1394 01:13:17,060 --> 01:13:20,764 What a performance. Unbelievable, ba... by. 1395 01:13:22,766 --> 01:13:24,468 Oh! 1396 01:13:24,501 --> 01:13:27,637 No, sugar patch. How could it be? 1397 01:13:27,671 --> 01:13:30,674 You were deathly allergic to tap water! 1398 01:13:30,707 --> 01:13:32,742 Oh. 1399 01:13:32,776 --> 01:13:34,444 I don't think she can hear you, Johnny... 1400 01:13:34,478 --> 01:13:35,845 I know she can't hear me! 1401 01:13:35,879 --> 01:13:38,114 (sobbing) (dog barking) 1402 01:13:38,147 --> 01:13:40,517 No, no, baby. Don't look. D-d-d-don't look. 1403 01:13:40,550 --> 01:13:42,686 Don't look. 1404 01:13:42,719 --> 01:13:45,221 Mama melted. What? 1405 01:13:45,254 --> 01:13:46,990 (whimpering) 1406 01:13:47,023 --> 01:13:48,492 Ugh. 1407 01:13:48,525 --> 01:13:51,227 We must be strong. 1408 01:13:51,260 --> 01:13:53,597 Go to your happy place, you rotten little dog. 1409 01:13:55,064 --> 01:13:57,166 What does she got there? Got it! 1410 01:13:57,200 --> 01:13:59,569 Her magic eye! (sobs) 1411 01:14:02,906 --> 01:14:04,808 What happened? 1412 01:14:04,841 --> 01:14:07,711 Oh, the witch is no longer in the house, OK? 1413 01:14:07,744 --> 01:14:09,879 She is down the drain. We melted her. 1414 01:14:09,913 --> 01:14:11,981 (cheering) 1415 01:14:14,150 --> 01:14:16,820 Wait, why are you guys hugging me? 1416 01:14:16,853 --> 01:14:18,822 You're her vile henchmen. 1417 01:14:18,855 --> 01:14:21,791 Vile? No. 1418 01:14:21,825 --> 01:14:25,762 We were just a gentle band of motorcycle enthusiasts 1419 01:14:25,795 --> 01:14:29,533 until the witch put us under an evil spell 1420 01:14:29,566 --> 01:14:34,504 and enslaved us with her... her enchanted biker cap. 1421 01:14:34,538 --> 01:14:38,942 (all gasp) Enchanted biker cap! 1422 01:14:38,975 --> 01:14:41,144 Since you wasted her, 1423 01:14:41,177 --> 01:14:44,147 this hat rightfully belongs to you. Give her the hat. 1424 01:14:44,180 --> 01:14:48,184 And now we must obey any order you give us! 1425 01:14:48,217 --> 01:14:51,688 Yeah, like, you can have everyone spank me 1426 01:14:51,721 --> 01:14:53,256 and call me names! 1427 01:14:56,092 --> 01:14:57,927 Or not. 1428 01:14:57,961 --> 01:15:00,930 First, we need to pick up some friends of mine. 1429 01:15:00,964 --> 01:15:02,932 (all) Yeah! 1430 01:15:04,834 --> 01:15:06,903 OK, here's how we get out of this place. 1431 01:15:06,936 --> 01:15:08,672 Quick, get me a soldering iron, 1432 01:15:08,705 --> 01:15:10,874 a jar of flux and some corn chips. 1433 01:15:10,907 --> 01:15:14,811 Oh, no! Flying monkeys! Roll away, roll away! 1434 01:15:14,844 --> 01:15:17,246 (screams) (motorcycle engine) 1435 01:15:21,685 --> 01:15:24,554 Oh, Dorothy! Dorothy! 1436 01:15:24,588 --> 01:15:26,556 Thank goodness! 1437 01:15:26,590 --> 01:15:29,125 Dorothy! 1438 01:15:29,158 --> 01:15:31,194 You guys didn't think I'd forget you, did you? 1439 01:15:31,227 --> 01:15:32,662 No, but what happened? Yeah! 1440 01:15:32,696 --> 01:15:34,130 It would take too long to explain. 1441 01:15:34,163 --> 01:15:35,899 No, no, no. I explain, I explain. 1442 01:15:35,932 --> 01:15:38,267 What happened was, the witch, she decided... 1443 01:15:38,301 --> 01:15:40,336 Flying monkeys, put 'em back together. 1444 01:15:40,369 --> 01:15:42,972 (Scarecrow) Oh, great. 1445 01:15:43,006 --> 01:15:45,141 (metal clanking and motors whirring) 1446 01:15:47,010 --> 01:15:49,679 (buzzing) (Scarecrow) Ouch. 1447 01:15:49,713 --> 01:15:51,948 Hey, easy. OK... 1448 01:15:51,981 --> 01:15:54,117 Thank you. (Scarecrow) You're all backwards. 1449 01:15:54,150 --> 01:15:56,920 Gee, I can see my rear end. 1450 01:15:56,953 --> 01:16:00,757 I must be working out, huh? (laughter) 1451 01:16:00,790 --> 01:16:03,126 Flying monkeys, take us to Emerald City. 1452 01:16:03,159 --> 01:16:05,629 We have an appointment with the wizard. (cheering) 1453 01:16:07,831 --> 01:16:09,866 Come on, everybody! Come on! 1454 01:16:09,899 --> 01:16:13,036 What are you doing here so... alive? 1455 01:16:13,069 --> 01:16:15,371 With flying monkeys? 1456 01:16:15,404 --> 01:16:18,241 We're here to see the wizard. But you don't have an appointment. 1457 01:16:18,274 --> 01:16:20,043 This is our appointment. (all) Yeah! 1458 01:16:20,076 --> 01:16:21,811 No! Come on, guys. 1459 01:16:21,845 --> 01:16:23,747 No, you can't! No! 1460 01:16:23,780 --> 01:16:26,015 The wizard won't... No, you can't do that. 1461 01:16:26,049 --> 01:16:27,751 (Scarecrow) You can't stop us now. Ow! 1462 01:16:27,784 --> 01:16:29,619 That's right, that's right! (Tin Thing) Open the door! 1463 01:16:29,653 --> 01:16:31,921 Come on. Come on, guys. 1464 01:16:31,955 --> 01:16:33,890 Follow me. 1465 01:16:33,923 --> 01:16:36,893 (Dorothy) We got the eye. We want what you prom... ised. 1466 01:16:36,926 --> 01:16:39,195 (murmuring) 1467 01:16:39,228 --> 01:16:41,397 (Lion) This is what I was afraid of? 1468 01:16:41,430 --> 01:16:43,366 (Scarecrow) It's not even green. 1469 01:16:43,399 --> 01:16:45,401 What's going on? Wait, stop. 1470 01:16:45,434 --> 01:16:48,337 Stop! You must wear the glasses 1471 01:16:48,371 --> 01:16:52,408 or you will fry from the wizard's brilliance! 1472 01:16:52,441 --> 01:16:56,045 Really? 'Cause... you're not frying. Yeah. 1473 01:16:56,079 --> 01:16:58,247 (meep) 1474 01:16:58,281 --> 01:17:01,184 Oh. Well, uh... um... 1475 01:17:01,217 --> 01:17:02,986 It burns! Oh! 1476 01:17:03,019 --> 01:17:08,825 My face sizzles and cooks before your very eyes! 1477 01:17:08,858 --> 01:17:11,928 Oh, the horror! The horror! 1478 01:17:11,961 --> 01:17:15,231 (meeping) 1479 01:17:15,264 --> 01:17:16,666 Huh? (meep) 1480 01:17:16,700 --> 01:17:18,367 Oh. (clears throat) 1481 01:17:18,401 --> 01:17:20,904 Um... Well... (clears throat) 1482 01:17:20,937 --> 01:17:24,107 I guess they're not buying it, Beakie. 1483 01:17:24,140 --> 01:17:26,876 So, we must away. (clears throat) 1484 01:17:26,910 --> 01:17:28,277 Toodle-oo. 1485 01:17:28,311 --> 01:17:33,049 (wizard) I am Oz, the great and terrible! 1486 01:17:33,082 --> 01:17:35,685 Jeepers, fellas, the joint is haunted! 1487 01:17:35,719 --> 01:17:37,754 Yeah! Make like we're running away! 1488 01:17:37,787 --> 01:17:40,890 It's OK! It's all right! Get back here. 1489 01:17:40,924 --> 01:17:43,359 (wizard) Why do you seek me? 1490 01:17:43,392 --> 01:17:46,029 Because we want what you promised! Yeah! 1491 01:17:46,062 --> 01:17:48,832 (wizard) Oh, dear me. This is sudden. Uh... 1492 01:17:48,865 --> 01:17:51,167 Come back tomorrow 1493 01:17:51,200 --> 01:17:54,871 during normal business hours 8:30am and 5:30pm. 1494 01:17:54,904 --> 01:17:56,940 No way! You've had enough time already! Yeah. 1495 01:17:56,973 --> 01:17:59,976 Sí. You better keep your promise or... 1496 01:18:00,009 --> 01:18:02,078 I'll go cyclone in here! 1497 01:18:04,247 --> 01:18:06,916 Hey! 1498 01:18:06,950 --> 01:18:09,318 (gibberish) 1499 01:18:14,958 --> 01:18:16,092 (gibberish) 1500 01:18:21,064 --> 01:18:23,166 (gasps for air) 1501 01:18:25,869 --> 01:18:26,970 Ah! 1502 01:18:33,442 --> 01:18:35,779 (on PA) We're done here! 1503 01:18:35,812 --> 01:18:38,381 Uh... Yeah... We can see you. 1504 01:18:38,414 --> 01:18:42,118 No, you can't! I'm invisible! 1505 01:18:42,151 --> 01:18:44,888 Stop. Seriously, you're embarrassing yourself. 1506 01:19:02,271 --> 01:19:03,239 Oh! 1507 01:19:03,272 --> 01:19:05,441 Oh, boy. 1508 01:19:07,811 --> 01:19:09,445 Hello. 1509 01:19:09,478 --> 01:19:12,215 So you're the wonderful Wizard of Oz? 1510 01:19:12,248 --> 01:19:14,117 I'm a little afraid of heights. Uh... 1511 01:19:14,150 --> 01:19:16,352 Hi, how are ya? Good to see ya. Hi. 1512 01:19:16,385 --> 01:19:17,954 Well, so, uh... 1513 01:19:17,987 --> 01:19:21,858 I'm Francis Kornfine at your service. Let me see this! 1514 01:19:21,891 --> 01:19:24,493 I'm sorry. It says I'm from Hollywood, California. 1515 01:19:24,527 --> 01:19:26,295 And it says that I drive a tour bus. 1516 01:19:26,329 --> 01:19:30,199 I gotta tell you, this is more than a little disappointing. 1517 01:19:30,233 --> 01:19:32,335 So that's why you wanted the eye. 1518 01:19:32,368 --> 01:19:34,137 You were afraid the Wicked Witch 1519 01:19:34,170 --> 01:19:36,973 would see you for what you really are - a big phony! 1520 01:19:37,006 --> 01:19:39,275 No, um... Yes. 1521 01:19:39,308 --> 01:19:42,145 Something... Well, something like that. 1522 01:19:42,178 --> 01:19:43,880 You're a bad man. No. 1523 01:19:43,913 --> 01:19:45,949 I have to disagree. I'm not a bad man. 1524 01:19:45,982 --> 01:19:47,951 I'm... You know... But I'm a bad wizard. 1525 01:19:47,984 --> 01:19:51,520 I gotta tell ya, I-I never set out to trick anyone. 1526 01:19:51,554 --> 01:19:53,522 It's just, I got here, and everybody, 1527 01:19:53,556 --> 01:19:55,959 they just, they assumed that I had this thing. 1528 01:19:55,992 --> 01:19:59,162 That I was this all-powerful wizard. 1529 01:19:59,195 --> 01:20:01,430 Why would they think that about you? You know why? 1530 01:20:01,464 --> 01:20:04,834 Because I-I-I could do this. (gasping) 1531 01:20:04,868 --> 01:20:07,236 Oh, my goodness! Wow! 1532 01:20:07,270 --> 01:20:10,439 Oh, do that again! Do that again! It's amazing! 1533 01:20:10,473 --> 01:20:13,376 They're simple people, but, oh, they're loving. 1534 01:20:13,409 --> 01:20:16,145 Did you ever tell anyone you weren't a wizard? 1535 01:20:16,179 --> 01:20:18,447 No! You know, one of the secrets of show business 1536 01:20:18,481 --> 01:20:21,450 you gotta give them what they want, you know. 1537 01:20:21,484 --> 01:20:23,152 Then give us what we want! 1538 01:20:23,186 --> 01:20:24,587 Yeah, and explain how you turned into 1539 01:20:24,620 --> 01:20:27,490 such a sexy chicken. 1540 01:20:27,523 --> 01:20:29,358 All right, all right. I'll do it. 1541 01:20:29,392 --> 01:20:31,895 I'm not really a wizard, but I-I'll do it. 1542 01:20:31,928 --> 01:20:34,463 I'll give you - every one of you - what I, uh, promised. 1543 01:20:34,497 --> 01:20:37,566 Give me two hours. Two hours. 1544 01:20:37,600 --> 01:20:40,403 (crowd noises) 1545 01:20:40,436 --> 01:20:43,072 (man) She's coming out! (man #2) Dorothy! Dorothy! 1546 01:20:43,106 --> 01:20:46,642 Dorothy! Over here! Ooh, ooh, Dorothy! Dorothy! 1547 01:20:46,675 --> 01:20:49,478 Would you sign my boomerang fish? Sure. 1548 01:20:49,512 --> 01:20:51,480 He's your biggest fan! 1549 01:20:51,514 --> 01:20:54,283 (chuckles) 1550 01:20:54,317 --> 01:20:57,453 Wow! Thank you! You're welcome. 1551 01:20:57,486 --> 01:20:59,956 I wish they could see this back in Kansas! 1552 01:20:59,989 --> 01:21:03,159 And here she comes - Emerald City's Dorothy Gale. 1553 01:21:03,192 --> 01:21:06,195 So, Dorothy, how does it feel to be the biggest star in Oz? 1554 01:21:06,229 --> 01:21:08,597 I don't know! I'm surprised everyone likes me so much. 1555 01:21:08,631 --> 01:21:11,200 They haven't even heard me sing! 1556 01:21:11,234 --> 01:21:14,437 You heard it, folks. Dorothy Gale, the biggest star in Oz. 1557 01:21:14,470 --> 01:21:16,139 Even though no one's ever heard her sing! 1558 01:21:16,172 --> 01:21:17,140 (glass shatters) 1559 01:21:17,173 --> 01:21:21,377 Dorothy! Dorothy! This way! 1560 01:21:21,410 --> 01:21:23,446 No, no, no. No, no, no. 1561 01:21:23,479 --> 01:21:26,082 No, listen, Eisner, baby. 1562 01:21:26,115 --> 01:21:27,616 If you think we're going for that deal, 1563 01:21:27,650 --> 01:21:30,286 you're out of your Mickey mind, OK? 1564 01:21:30,319 --> 01:21:33,022 I can't talk right now. I gotta run. I gotta run. I gotta run! 1565 01:21:33,056 --> 01:21:35,091 (* theme music over TV) 1566 01:21:35,124 --> 01:21:36,659 (static) 1567 01:21:39,695 --> 01:21:42,265 Ladies and gentleman - and unisex penguins 1568 01:21:42,298 --> 01:21:44,600 live from Emerald City, 1569 01:21:44,633 --> 01:21:46,469 it's the wonderful Wizard of Oz! 1570 01:21:46,502 --> 01:21:48,671 (cheering and applause) 1571 01:21:50,673 --> 01:21:52,241 (wizard) Ah, thank you. 1572 01:21:52,275 --> 01:21:55,011 Oh, this is so exciting! 1573 01:21:55,044 --> 01:21:59,482 Oh, thanks. Thank you. Please. Come on! 1574 01:21:59,515 --> 01:22:01,484 Thank you. Thank you. Listen... 1575 01:22:03,719 --> 01:22:07,323 Um... I-I-I called you all together tonight, so... 1576 01:22:07,356 --> 01:22:11,995 so the good folks of Emerald City and Oz at large can... 1577 01:22:12,028 --> 01:22:15,231 finally know the truth. I... 1578 01:22:15,264 --> 01:22:16,532 (sighs) 1579 01:22:16,565 --> 01:22:19,602 I am not who I appear to be. (gasping) 1580 01:22:19,635 --> 01:22:22,171 You see, I'm just... 1581 01:22:22,205 --> 01:22:25,208 an ordinary guy... from Hollywood. 1582 01:22:25,241 --> 01:22:28,244 That's a beautiful place where people keep their word 1583 01:22:28,277 --> 01:22:30,646 and a deal is always honored. 1584 01:22:30,679 --> 01:22:32,715 (all) Nah-uh. 1585 01:22:32,748 --> 01:22:35,418 You see, I made a promise to some brave folks, 1586 01:22:35,451 --> 01:22:38,421 and I want to keep that promise in front of everyone! 1587 01:22:38,454 --> 01:22:40,623 So... 1588 01:22:40,656 --> 01:22:43,759 your wizard is gonna grant some wishes! 1589 01:22:43,792 --> 01:22:46,662 (applause and cheering) Come on. Come on! 1590 01:22:46,695 --> 01:22:48,998 Oh, I love wizards! First of all, 1591 01:22:49,032 --> 01:22:50,766 let's bring out... the lion. 1592 01:22:50,799 --> 01:22:52,635 (cheering) 1593 01:22:58,074 --> 01:22:59,642 (mumbling) 1594 01:23:01,377 --> 01:23:03,579 Welcome, Mr. Lion. 1595 01:23:03,612 --> 01:23:06,015 I-I believe you asked for some courage. 1596 01:23:06,049 --> 01:23:07,616 Yes. Yes, I did. 1597 01:23:07,650 --> 01:23:09,485 And-And courage you shall have. 1598 01:23:09,518 --> 01:23:12,355 This golden microphone of bravery 1599 01:23:12,388 --> 01:23:15,624 will certainly end any debate 1600 01:23:15,658 --> 01:23:18,427 as to who's really the king of beasts. 1601 01:23:18,461 --> 01:23:20,263 There you go. Let me turn this on for you. 1602 01:23:20,296 --> 01:23:22,665 Whoa! Uh-huh. 1603 01:23:22,698 --> 01:23:25,334 Wow! I guess I do feel a little braver. 1604 01:23:25,368 --> 01:23:27,303 So, two ducks waddle into a bar. 1605 01:23:27,336 --> 01:23:29,572 Bartender says... 1606 01:23:29,605 --> 01:23:31,474 Get off. That's not what he says. 1607 01:23:31,507 --> 01:23:34,677 No, no, no. Get off. Oh, that's me. Yeah. 1608 01:23:34,710 --> 01:23:36,445 (* theme music) 1609 01:23:38,314 --> 01:23:41,417 And now, ladies and gentlemen... Tin Thing. 1610 01:23:41,450 --> 01:23:43,786 (* theme music) (applause) 1611 01:23:47,256 --> 01:23:48,691 Now, Tin Thing, you asked for a heart, 1612 01:23:48,724 --> 01:23:51,227 and thanks to my clever scientists 1613 01:23:51,260 --> 01:23:53,729 at the Emerald City labs, 1614 01:23:53,762 --> 01:23:56,232 your chest... (gasps) 1615 01:23:56,265 --> 01:23:58,434 ...will never be empty again. 1616 01:23:58,467 --> 01:23:59,735 This won't hurt. (beeps) 1617 01:23:59,768 --> 01:24:01,404 (* theme music) (applause) 1618 01:24:01,437 --> 01:24:03,372 Gosh! 1619 01:24:03,406 --> 01:24:05,841 This is... this is so nice! 1620 01:24:05,874 --> 01:24:11,414 What if there were someone to share that heart... with? 1621 01:24:11,447 --> 01:24:14,150 (applause) Camilla! 1622 01:24:14,183 --> 01:24:17,420 Oh, my darling! I've missed you so much! 1623 01:24:17,453 --> 01:24:19,555 (all) Aw! 1624 01:24:19,588 --> 01:24:21,690 (all) Aw! 1625 01:24:21,724 --> 01:24:25,761 Oh, dar-- Look who's filled out! 1626 01:24:25,794 --> 01:24:27,496 (clucking) I don't mean chubby. 1627 01:24:27,530 --> 01:24:29,398 I mean in a nice-- Would you excuse us? 1628 01:24:29,432 --> 01:24:31,100 Yes, take it offstage. Come on. 1629 01:24:31,134 --> 01:24:33,169 (applause) 1630 01:24:33,202 --> 01:24:36,339 Let's not forget... the scarecrow. 1631 01:24:36,372 --> 01:24:39,308 (* theme music) Oh! 1632 01:24:39,342 --> 01:24:41,610 Hey, guys. Hey, Scarecrow! 1633 01:24:41,644 --> 01:24:44,413 Well, Mr. Scarecrow, you've asked for nothing more than a brain. 1634 01:24:44,447 --> 01:24:46,715 Mm-hmm. Now, from this day forth, 1635 01:24:46,749 --> 01:24:48,751 your knowledge shall know no bounds. 1636 01:24:48,784 --> 01:24:49,952 Oh. 1637 01:24:49,985 --> 01:24:53,789 But, um... to grant your wish, I have to take your head off. 1638 01:24:53,822 --> 01:24:55,424 (gasps) 1639 01:24:55,458 --> 01:24:56,725 Uh... Could I... 1640 01:24:56,759 --> 01:24:57,726 could I think about it? 1641 01:24:57,760 --> 01:24:59,895 No. You have no brains. 1642 01:24:59,928 --> 01:25:01,430 Oh. Good point. 1643 01:25:01,464 --> 01:25:02,865 Bring in the brains. 1644 01:25:02,898 --> 01:25:04,433 (applause) 1645 01:25:04,467 --> 01:25:07,803 (speaks mock Swedish) 1646 01:25:07,836 --> 01:25:09,672 Thank you. (hums) 1647 01:25:09,705 --> 01:25:12,808 All right, quiet, please. I need absolute... 1648 01:25:12,841 --> 01:25:13,876 concentration. 1649 01:25:13,909 --> 01:25:16,179 Sh, sh! Quiet! Sh! 1650 01:25:16,212 --> 01:25:17,446 Drum roll, please. 1651 01:25:17,480 --> 01:25:19,515 (drum roll) 1652 01:25:19,548 --> 01:25:20,649 Uh... 1653 01:25:20,683 --> 01:25:22,585 Huh... 1654 01:25:26,955 --> 01:25:28,857 (all scream) 1655 01:25:30,393 --> 01:25:31,627 What are you...? What are you...? Oh! 1656 01:25:31,660 --> 01:25:33,128 (giggling) 1657 01:25:35,364 --> 01:25:37,500 (Kermit) This is surreal! 1658 01:25:37,533 --> 01:25:39,602 Or should I say, cereal? 1659 01:25:41,604 --> 01:25:44,173 (cheering) 1660 01:25:44,207 --> 01:25:47,210 (applause) 1661 01:25:47,243 --> 01:25:49,578 And now you will be a great man. 1662 01:25:49,612 --> 01:25:53,316 For I have given you a lot of bran new brains! 1663 01:25:53,349 --> 01:25:55,951 (laughter) 1664 01:25:55,984 --> 01:25:57,253 That's funny? 1665 01:25:57,286 --> 01:25:58,687 Excuse me. Excuse me. 1666 01:25:58,721 --> 01:26:00,489 (whispering) Oh, right down there, to the left. 1667 01:26:00,523 --> 01:26:02,591 Left. Thanks! 1668 01:26:02,625 --> 01:26:08,264 And finally, it's time for Oz's newest overnight sensation to sing. 1669 01:26:08,297 --> 01:26:12,468 My spotlight now belongs to Miss Dorothy Gale. 1670 01:26:12,501 --> 01:26:15,704 (cheering) 1671 01:26:15,738 --> 01:26:19,342 * It's a good life 1672 01:26:19,375 --> 01:26:21,977 * A happy ending where you landed 1673 01:26:22,010 --> 01:26:25,414 * It's a good life 1674 01:26:25,448 --> 01:26:27,983 * Don't you love how it's turning out? 1675 01:26:28,016 --> 01:26:32,588 * It's a good life Oh! 1676 01:26:32,621 --> 01:26:34,657 * See what happens when you take your chances 1677 01:26:34,690 --> 01:26:38,427 * It's a good life 1678 01:26:38,461 --> 01:26:41,597 Stop! Stop the music. 1679 01:26:41,630 --> 01:26:42,598 (cheering) 1680 01:26:42,631 --> 01:26:44,833 (music stops) 1681 01:26:44,867 --> 01:26:48,337 I'm sorry, but this whole thing is a lie. 1682 01:26:48,371 --> 01:26:50,906 It's no different than those fake green glasses in Emerald City! 1683 01:26:50,939 --> 01:26:52,308 Or that applause machine. 1684 01:26:52,341 --> 01:26:54,910 Oh! Oh, oh... 1685 01:26:54,943 --> 01:27:00,015 You see, this wizard hasn't given you anything you didn't already have! 1686 01:27:00,048 --> 01:27:03,652 I've never had such a shiny microphone before. 1687 01:27:03,686 --> 01:27:05,888 The point is, wizard or no wizard, 1688 01:27:05,921 --> 01:27:10,459 you were already brave, kind and smart. 1689 01:27:10,493 --> 01:27:12,661 Well, gee, I didn't think I was thinking, 1690 01:27:12,695 --> 01:27:15,864 but, come to think of it, I think I was thinking. Ha. 1691 01:27:15,898 --> 01:27:17,433 Makes you think. 1692 01:27:17,466 --> 01:27:19,835 (Wizard) OK, I'm... I'm really upset. 1693 01:27:19,868 --> 01:27:23,038 Dorothy, you say I-I didn't grant your wish. 1694 01:27:23,071 --> 01:27:24,540 But you're on television. 1695 01:27:24,573 --> 01:27:27,510 Millions hang on your every word. 1696 01:27:27,543 --> 01:27:30,045 Yes, I control the programming and nothing else is on, 1697 01:27:30,078 --> 01:27:33,482 but you're famous, Dorothy. You're a star. 1698 01:27:33,516 --> 01:27:35,951 And that, I gotta say it, that's, uh... 1699 01:27:35,984 --> 01:27:37,953 that's because of me. 1700 01:27:37,986 --> 01:27:41,357 You really want to grant my wish, Wizard? 1701 01:27:41,390 --> 01:27:45,661 Send me home, to Kansas, to my family. 1702 01:27:45,694 --> 01:27:48,797 Dorothy, you consider it done. 1703 01:27:48,831 --> 01:27:50,933 Really? Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you. 1704 01:27:50,966 --> 01:27:54,036 I knew you couldn't be completely useless. When do we leave? 1705 01:27:54,069 --> 01:27:58,040 Well, um, actually, you have to visit the fourth witch, Glinda, 1706 01:27:58,073 --> 01:28:00,843 the Good Witch of the, um... 1707 01:28:00,876 --> 01:28:02,411 of the South. 1708 01:28:02,445 --> 01:28:04,079 You gotta be kidding me! 1709 01:28:04,112 --> 01:28:07,816 Another witch? Great. How do I find this one? 1710 01:28:07,850 --> 01:28:10,486 Sí, sí. What freaky land we got to visit now, guy? 1711 01:28:10,519 --> 01:28:13,422 Tomorrowland, Adventureland, Canada. 1712 01:28:13,456 --> 01:28:16,825 The wizard possesses a magic eye 1713 01:28:16,859 --> 01:28:20,062 to, uh... give us all the, uh, answer. 1714 01:28:20,095 --> 01:28:23,866 Dude, I know all about the magic eye. I gave it to you, remember? 1715 01:28:23,899 --> 01:28:26,435 Oh, yes. Ah! Well, there she is. 1716 01:28:26,469 --> 01:28:27,035 She's in Munchkinland. 1717 01:28:27,069 --> 01:28:29,372 Can you see that? 1718 01:28:29,405 --> 01:28:31,874 She's... she's, uh... 1719 01:28:31,907 --> 01:28:34,643 She's visiting her sister, Tattypoo. 1720 01:28:34,677 --> 01:28:38,381 the Good Witch of the, um... North. 1721 01:28:39,682 --> 01:28:42,785 All right, guys. Back to Munchkinland. 1722 01:28:45,454 --> 01:28:46,655 Oh, well. 1723 01:28:46,689 --> 01:28:47,923 OK. 1724 01:28:52,495 --> 01:28:53,696 You're not so scary. 1725 01:28:53,729 --> 01:28:55,498 Hmph! (* theme music) 1726 01:28:55,531 --> 01:28:57,466 (applause) 1727 01:28:59,835 --> 01:29:01,470 Yeah, this is it. I definitely... 1728 01:29:01,504 --> 01:29:03,839 This is Munchkinland. I've seen it in the postcards. 1729 01:29:03,872 --> 01:29:05,574 Welcome back, Dorothy. 1730 01:29:05,608 --> 01:29:08,577 I'm glad to see your quest for fame was such a triumph. 1731 01:29:08,611 --> 01:29:11,814 You're now the most talked-about diva in all the land. 1732 01:29:11,847 --> 01:29:15,951 I saw you on TV. TV! I saw her on TV! 1733 01:29:15,984 --> 01:29:18,887 Yes, I know. Yeah, yeah. 1734 01:29:18,921 --> 01:29:20,789 Excuse me, but where can I find your sister Glinda? 1735 01:29:20,823 --> 01:29:21,790 (muppet) Here's your cattuccino, Glinda. 1736 01:29:21,824 --> 01:29:23,058 Right here, dear. 1737 01:29:23,091 --> 01:29:23,959 Where you goin'? 1738 01:29:23,992 --> 01:29:26,128 Shoo, shoo, shoo. 1739 01:29:26,161 --> 01:29:27,696 Enchanté. 1740 01:29:27,730 --> 01:29:29,832 Oh! Mm. 1741 01:29:29,865 --> 01:29:33,869 And who is this sophisticated and distinguished gentleman? 1742 01:29:33,902 --> 01:29:35,771 Well, my name is Toto. It's a pleasure... 1743 01:29:35,804 --> 01:29:37,806 Not you. 1744 01:29:37,840 --> 01:29:39,775 How is it we've never met? 1745 01:29:39,808 --> 01:29:42,578 Well, I've spent a lot of time hanging around on the farm... 1746 01:29:42,611 --> 01:29:43,812 literally. 1747 01:29:43,846 --> 01:29:45,814 Ah, good one! 1748 01:29:45,848 --> 01:29:48,484 Thanks. Ooh, how intriguing. 1749 01:29:48,517 --> 01:29:50,486 I love agriculture. Oh? 1750 01:29:50,519 --> 01:29:53,856 Plowing the fields, rolling in the hay... 1751 01:29:53,889 --> 01:29:55,858 Um, guys? Hate to interrupt, 1752 01:29:55,891 --> 01:29:58,894 but the wizard said you can help me get home. 1753 01:29:58,927 --> 01:30:00,729 It's true. 1754 01:30:00,763 --> 01:30:04,600 Just say goodbye to your friends and... I will show you the way. 1755 01:30:05,968 --> 01:30:07,202 Well, guys. 1756 01:30:07,235 --> 01:30:11,173 Guess this is goodbye. (all) Aw! 1757 01:30:11,206 --> 01:30:13,075 (muppet) We're really gonna miss you, darling. (squeak) 1758 01:30:13,108 --> 01:30:13,909 (muppet #2) Yeah. What? 1759 01:30:13,942 --> 01:30:16,211 You were the best boss we ever had. 1760 01:30:16,244 --> 01:30:19,715 I think it's time for you to be your own boss. 1761 01:30:21,149 --> 01:30:23,151 Oh, I don't believe you're gonna do it! 1762 01:30:26,555 --> 01:30:29,458 (all cheer) 1763 01:30:29,492 --> 01:30:31,560 I'm sorry, I'm not following. 1764 01:30:31,594 --> 01:30:32,728 The monkey gets the hat? 1765 01:30:32,761 --> 01:30:34,196 The monkey gets the hat? 1766 01:30:34,229 --> 01:30:35,498 The monkey gets the hat. 1767 01:30:37,700 --> 01:30:39,067 Huh. 1768 01:30:40,869 --> 01:30:42,505 Looks like this is finally it. 1769 01:30:44,206 --> 01:30:47,843 We must be brave, Dorothy. 1770 01:30:47,876 --> 01:30:49,612 Oh, oh! 1771 01:30:49,645 --> 01:30:53,081 (sobs) 1772 01:30:53,115 --> 01:30:57,486 Goodbyes always break my heart. (sobs) 1773 01:30:57,520 --> 01:30:58,487 Aw. 1774 01:30:58,521 --> 01:31:00,823 I love you guys. 1775 01:31:00,856 --> 01:31:02,558 I'll never forget you. 1776 01:31:02,591 --> 01:31:03,726 Oh. 1777 01:31:05,561 --> 01:31:07,462 I'll never forget you, either. 1778 01:31:13,869 --> 01:31:15,604 Toto, you sure... 1779 01:31:15,638 --> 01:31:19,207 No! Don't speak, my little Dorothita. 1780 01:31:20,643 --> 01:31:22,511 Just go! 1781 01:31:22,545 --> 01:31:25,247 Don't look back, OK? 1782 01:31:25,280 --> 01:31:29,618 Because if you do, I fear my tears would... 1783 01:31:29,652 --> 01:31:31,554 So how do these things work, anyway? 1784 01:31:31,587 --> 01:31:33,889 Is there a bus or something? 1785 01:31:33,922 --> 01:31:37,526 No, it's your shoes. They have the power to take you anywhere. 1786 01:31:37,560 --> 01:31:38,861 Really? Anywhere? 1787 01:31:38,894 --> 01:31:41,897 Well, I wish someone would have told me this 1788 01:31:41,930 --> 01:31:46,101 before these magic shoes gave me these magic blisters. 1789 01:31:47,936 --> 01:31:51,039 What? Look, this is how things work in enchanted lands. 1790 01:31:51,073 --> 01:31:53,776 The thing you were looking for was there all along! Jeez! 1791 01:31:53,809 --> 01:31:55,010 Do you wanna get home or not? 1792 01:31:55,043 --> 01:31:57,980 Thanks, sis. 1793 01:31:58,013 --> 01:32:01,784 All you have to do is knock your heels together three times, 1794 01:32:01,817 --> 01:32:05,788 and command the shoes to take you wherever you wish to go. 1795 01:32:05,821 --> 01:32:07,823 (sighs) 1796 01:32:07,856 --> 01:32:09,291 I hope this works. 1797 01:32:11,594 --> 01:32:13,829 (muppets) One, two, three! 1798 01:32:13,862 --> 01:32:17,265 Take me home to Aunt Em! 1799 01:32:23,005 --> 01:32:24,039 Bye, Dorothy! 1800 01:32:24,072 --> 01:32:27,309 Yeah. We'll miss you. 1801 01:33:02,210 --> 01:33:05,013 Hey, need any help with the early-bird rush? 1802 01:33:05,047 --> 01:33:06,314 Dorothy! 1803 01:33:06,348 --> 01:33:08,250 You're alive! 1804 01:33:08,283 --> 01:33:12,187 Look at you! Man, when that twister hit 1805 01:33:12,220 --> 01:33:12,921 and flew off with the house, 1806 01:33:12,955 --> 01:33:15,824 well, we thought that you were... 1807 01:33:15,858 --> 01:33:19,261 Well, where on earth have you been, Dorothy? 1808 01:33:19,294 --> 01:33:20,763 And what are you wearing? 1809 01:33:20,796 --> 01:33:22,665 What's wrong with my clothes now? 1810 01:33:22,698 --> 01:33:25,100 Guess which refrigerator broke down when you were gone? The... 1811 01:33:25,133 --> 01:33:27,069 Don't worry, Uncle Henry. I don't want to fight. 1812 01:33:27,102 --> 01:33:30,138 I just want to say... you were right. 1813 01:33:30,172 --> 01:33:35,911 Wanting to be a big star made me forget what I really love about singing. 1814 01:33:35,944 --> 01:33:38,380 When you're doing it right, I mean really singing, 1815 01:33:38,413 --> 01:33:40,749 you don't notice where you are anyway. 1816 01:33:40,783 --> 01:33:44,319 I don't think I'm leaving Kansas for a while! 1817 01:33:44,352 --> 01:33:46,121 Well, somebody's gonna be sorry to hear that. 1818 01:33:46,154 --> 01:33:47,990 He's been in here every day asking about you. 1819 01:33:48,023 --> 01:33:50,358 And eatin' up all the flowers. Mm-hmm. 1820 01:33:50,392 --> 01:33:51,259 Mr. Kermit? 1821 01:33:53,061 --> 01:33:54,963 Oh, Miss Gale! 1822 01:33:54,997 --> 01:33:56,965 Oh, I'm so glad that you're all right! 1823 01:33:56,999 --> 01:33:58,366 Hey, we listened to your demo, 1824 01:33:58,400 --> 01:34:00,736 and you're the best singer that we heard anywhere! 1825 01:34:00,769 --> 01:34:02,871 We're hoping you'll join our tour! 1826 01:34:02,905 --> 01:34:06,041 Oh, wow! I can't believe it! 1827 01:34:06,074 --> 01:34:08,443 But... I can't leave now. 1828 01:34:08,476 --> 01:34:11,814 I just got home with my family. 1829 01:34:11,847 --> 01:34:12,948 Oh. 1830 01:34:12,981 --> 01:34:15,684 Well, OK. Uh... 1831 01:34:15,718 --> 01:34:17,953 Thank you for your time. Um... 1832 01:34:17,986 --> 01:34:20,923 I mean, there was that one other girl in Nebraska 1833 01:34:20,956 --> 01:34:21,957 who was all right... 1834 01:34:21,990 --> 01:34:23,992 Kermit, w-wait. Don't leave yet. 1835 01:34:24,026 --> 01:34:26,294 OK. 1836 01:34:26,328 --> 01:34:29,965 Dorothy, when that wind picked up our house and blew it away, 1837 01:34:29,998 --> 01:34:33,435 it gave me a whole new perspective on what home is really about. 1838 01:34:33,468 --> 01:34:37,372 If you want to go on tour and sing, I want you to go. 1839 01:34:37,405 --> 01:34:39,875 because now I know you'll always be home with us, 1840 01:34:39,908 --> 01:34:41,276 no matter where you are. 1841 01:34:41,309 --> 01:34:45,080 You mean it? Come on. 1842 01:34:45,113 --> 01:34:46,782 Wanna get some, Kermit? We're family now. 1843 01:34:46,815 --> 01:34:49,084 Ah. 1844 01:34:49,117 --> 01:34:50,352 You guys are great. 1845 01:34:50,385 --> 01:34:52,855 Well, Kermit. Yeah? 1846 01:34:52,888 --> 01:34:53,822 Guess I'm going with you! 1847 01:34:53,856 --> 01:34:55,157 Great! 1848 01:34:55,190 --> 01:34:57,359 Ladies and gentlemen, Miss Dorothy Gale! 1849 01:34:57,392 --> 01:34:59,862 (applause and cheering) 1850 01:34:59,895 --> 01:35:02,931 * Ah-ha, whoa 1851 01:35:02,965 --> 01:35:05,968 * Yeah, yeah, yeah 1852 01:35:06,001 --> 01:35:08,771 * I got a feeling that we did something right 1853 01:35:08,804 --> 01:35:10,973 * Everything looking up, future shining bright 1854 01:35:11,006 --> 01:35:13,341 * I gotta get the message out, send it loud and clear 1855 01:35:13,375 --> 01:35:15,778 * All you need is right here 1856 01:35:15,811 --> 01:35:18,146 * Who said happiness is so far away? 1857 01:35:18,180 --> 01:35:20,849 * Closer than you might think, find it every day 1858 01:35:20,883 --> 01:35:25,287 * Step back, you'll see you're part of a family 1859 01:35:25,320 --> 01:35:27,856 * It's a good life 1860 01:35:27,890 --> 01:35:29,925 * A happy ending is where you landed 1861 01:35:29,958 --> 01:35:32,394 * It's a good life 1862 01:35:32,427 --> 01:35:34,429 * Don't you love how it's turning out? 1863 01:35:34,462 --> 01:35:37,265 * It's a good life 1864 01:35:37,299 --> 01:35:39,768 * See what happens when you take your chances? 1865 01:35:39,802 --> 01:35:41,469 * It's a good life 1866 01:35:41,503 --> 01:35:45,107 * Come on and find what I've found 1867 01:35:45,140 --> 01:35:46,474 (Animal) Good life! Good life! 1868 01:35:46,508 --> 01:35:48,343 Oh, that's my niece! 1869 01:35:48,376 --> 01:35:50,145 It's my niece. That's my niece! 1870 01:35:50,178 --> 01:35:51,513 * Yeah 1871 01:35:51,546 --> 01:35:53,816 Ladies and gentlemen, Miss Dorothy Gale! 1872 01:35:53,849 --> 01:35:54,883 (applause and cheering) 1873 01:35:54,917 --> 01:35:58,453 Yay! Yay! 129051