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1
00:00:26,903 --> 00:00:28,613
- Astrid?
- Yes, I'm fine.
2
00:00:28,654 --> 00:00:29,906
Let's do this, I'm up.
3
00:00:29,947 --> 00:00:31,741
Oh, you're not with them?
4
00:00:31,783 --> 00:00:33,451
- No, I thought
they were with you.
5
00:00:33,493 --> 00:00:35,036
Thought that it's your job to...
I just...
6
00:00:35,078 --> 00:00:36,662
I thought they were with you,
at this moment.
7
00:00:36,704 --> 00:00:39,332
- Relax, James. It's not like
anyone exploded.
8
00:00:39,373 --> 00:00:40,416
Viv with Betty.
9
00:00:40,458 --> 00:00:42,376
- One exploded.
Still pretty good.
10
00:00:44,587 --> 00:00:46,214
Look at the mess
you made!
11
00:00:46,255 --> 00:00:47,673
You're cleaning this up.
12
00:00:47,715 --> 00:00:49,675
I put you in jail for a reason.
13
00:00:49,717 --> 00:00:51,469
- I could get out
whenever I want!
14
00:00:51,511 --> 00:00:53,054
- No, you can't.
- You're poo-poo.
15
00:00:53,096 --> 00:00:54,680
- You're a poo-poo!
- You are!
16
00:00:54,722 --> 00:00:56,682
- Okay, Viv, Viv, come out
from the clothes, please.
17
00:00:56,724 --> 00:00:58,768
- Felix, what are you doing
here? Come on, buddy.
18
00:00:58,810 --> 00:01:00,394
- I put her in jail. She's dumb.
19
00:01:00,436 --> 00:01:01,979
- You can't call
your sister dumb.
20
00:01:02,021 --> 00:01:04,148
Anyone overhears that, you're
gonna get canceled very hard.
21
00:01:04,190 --> 00:01:05,566
- What's burning?
Did you burn cereal?
22
00:01:05,608 --> 00:01:07,068
I'm making eggs.
23
00:01:07,110 --> 00:01:09,403
- Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
- Okay, it's fine.
24
00:01:09,445 --> 00:01:10,947
Here we go. Back up!
25
00:01:10,988 --> 00:01:12,949
- Astrid: There's a lot of
research out there that shows
26
00:01:12,990 --> 00:01:16,285
people with kids are less happy
than people without kids.
27
00:01:16,869 --> 00:01:19,372
- And look, it's hard to argue
with the facts.
28
00:01:19,413 --> 00:01:21,124
Before kids, we had this.
29
00:01:23,501 --> 00:01:25,503
Now, we have this.
30
00:01:27,922 --> 00:01:30,842
Before,
it was kinda like this.
31
00:01:32,760 --> 00:01:34,512
Now, it's more like this.
32
00:01:34,929 --> 00:01:38,766
And we swapped this,
for this.
33
00:01:40,726 --> 00:01:43,312
So, it's very possible
that these big idiots
34
00:01:43,354 --> 00:01:47,108
have made a huge mistake
by having these little idiots.
35
00:01:47,150 --> 00:01:48,442
Idiots like us.
36
00:01:48,484 --> 00:01:51,112
These are our kids,
Felix and Vivian.
37
00:01:51,154 --> 00:01:52,738
I'm Astrid, this is James.
38
00:01:52,780 --> 00:01:55,324
- And I'm James.
- Now there's two of them.
39
00:01:55,366 --> 00:01:59,328
No! Anyway,
are parents less happy
40
00:01:59,370 --> 00:02:00,663
than childless people?
41
00:02:00,705 --> 00:02:02,123
How do you even
measure happiness?
42
00:02:02,165 --> 00:02:03,541
That's where I can help.
43
00:02:03,583 --> 00:02:05,126
You see, before becoming
a full-time mom,
44
00:02:05,168 --> 00:02:06,377
I was a data analyst.
45
00:02:06,419 --> 00:02:08,504
So, I take raw,
quantifiable data
46
00:02:08,546 --> 00:02:09,839
like money, free time,
47
00:02:09,881 --> 00:02:11,591
uninterrupted minutes
on the toilet,
48
00:02:11,632 --> 00:02:13,551
and I present them in ways
that people can understand.
49
00:02:13,593 --> 00:02:15,469
But what about the data
you can't measure?
50
00:02:15,511 --> 00:02:18,514
Like joy, pride,
and good vibes, man?
51
00:02:18,556 --> 00:02:20,266
Shouldn't that count too
- JAMES: Yeah, right?
52
00:02:20,308 --> 00:02:22,226
Maybe we don't have as much
money or time or fun,
53
00:02:22,268 --> 00:02:24,979
- but we do have...
- You know, kids.
54
00:02:26,439 --> 00:02:27,857
- Yeah, that stuff can
just go on the floor.
55
00:02:28,316 --> 00:02:29,817
- Think of the floor
as one big shelf.
56
00:02:29,859 --> 00:02:30,818
- Kids certainly do.
57
00:02:30,860 --> 00:02:32,278
- Chuck emailed me last night.
58
00:02:32,320 --> 00:02:34,280
- Hey, how is old Chucky?
59
00:02:34,322 --> 00:02:35,489
- That's my old boss.
60
00:02:35,531 --> 00:02:36,991
- Yeah, I didn't know.
You caught me.
61
00:02:37,033 --> 00:02:38,951
- He said my job's available
in a few months
62
00:02:38,993 --> 00:02:40,286
if I'm ready to go back.
63
00:02:40,328 --> 00:02:41,662
- Oh! That's amazing!
64
00:02:41,704 --> 00:02:43,581
Do you... It's totally
up to you. We need the money.
65
00:02:43,623 --> 00:02:45,708
- Yes, no, I'm definitely
going back. I need to earn.
66
00:02:45,750 --> 00:02:47,335
And also,
my brain's turning to mush.
67
00:02:47,376 --> 00:02:48,753
The other day, I forgot the word
"Japan."
68
00:02:48,794 --> 00:02:50,421
- That was today.
- When I'm a working girl,
69
00:02:50,463 --> 00:02:53,174
I'll never forget Japan again.
So, I just need to let 'em know.
70
00:02:53,216 --> 00:02:55,760
- Viv's hogging the red crayons.
- No, I'm not.
71
00:02:55,801 --> 00:02:57,470
- Okay, guys,
we're having coffee.
72
00:02:57,511 --> 00:02:58,721
This is our time, remember?
73
00:02:58,763 --> 00:03:00,348
- You guys shouldn't be drawing
anyway
74
00:03:00,389 --> 00:03:02,141
unless you're ready for school.
Are you ready for school?
75
00:03:02,183 --> 00:03:03,517
- I need underwear.
- Well...
76
00:03:03,559 --> 00:03:04,977
- Buddy, you're wearing pants.
77
00:03:05,019 --> 00:03:06,771
- Yeah, that's called
going commando.
78
00:03:06,812 --> 00:03:09,065
That can't be right.
They, for sure, wore underwear.
79
00:03:09,106 --> 00:03:11,692
- Or bareback. No, that's
not right either. Raw dog!
80
00:03:13,069 --> 00:03:16,239
You know what we should do?
We should celebrate.
81
00:03:16,280 --> 00:03:17,156
- Yes.
82
00:03:17,198 --> 00:03:18,658
- A nice dinner,
just you and me.
83
00:03:18,699 --> 00:03:20,534
- Can we find
a last minute babysitter
84
00:03:20,576 --> 00:03:22,036
that can handle Viv?
85
00:03:25,081 --> 00:03:26,832
- The kids can't come.
Breakfast this morning
86
00:03:26,874 --> 00:03:28,000
was like a Vikings' banquet.
87
00:03:28,042 --> 00:03:29,252
- No, it's normal.
88
00:03:29,293 --> 00:03:30,628
My sister and I
used to have wet bread fights.
89
00:03:30,670 --> 00:03:31,837
- I'd like to go to a nice place
90
00:03:31,879 --> 00:03:33,422
where they don't let you
throw wet bread.
91
00:03:33,464 --> 00:03:35,633
- I thought you said it was
supposed to be a celebration.
92
00:03:37,802 --> 00:03:40,054
- Okay, well, all
the babysitters are booked.
93
00:03:40,096 --> 00:03:41,931
Anyway, aren't you going to
Ennis's tonight?
94
00:03:41,973 --> 00:03:43,182
- I'll just bail.
95
00:03:43,224 --> 00:03:44,934
We should do something nice.
We never do that anymore.
96
00:03:44,976 --> 00:03:47,436
- What? Didn't we just have that
turkey cranberry thing?
97
00:03:47,478 --> 00:03:48,771
- Christmas dinner?
98
00:03:48,813 --> 00:03:51,148
- Why don't we order
a fancy pizza?
99
00:03:51,190 --> 00:03:52,566
- No, no, no,
that's not nice enough.
100
00:03:52,608 --> 00:03:54,986
I'm gonna make us
the pork shoulder thing,
101
00:03:55,027 --> 00:03:56,279
and you are gonna love it.
102
00:03:56,320 --> 00:03:58,531
- So, do I have to buy
the stuff for that, too?
103
00:03:58,572 --> 00:04:01,575
- No. Yes, yes. Yes, please.
104
00:04:05,830 --> 00:04:07,081
- What?
105
00:04:07,123 --> 00:04:09,583
- Your coffee, your coffee.
- No, there's caffeine in that.
106
00:04:09,625 --> 00:04:11,127
- Tonight, we celebrate
two incomes.
107
00:04:11,168 --> 00:04:16,882
- Yatta! That means,
"we did it", in... place.
108
00:04:16,924 --> 00:04:17,758
- You can do it!
109
00:04:17,800 --> 00:04:19,927
- Japan!
- There it is!
110
00:04:19,969 --> 00:04:21,387
- Bye!
111
00:04:23,889 --> 00:04:26,934
- That one?
- We do that one?
112
00:04:26,976 --> 00:04:28,311
Hello, Astrid.
113
00:04:28,352 --> 00:04:29,562
- Oh, Dawn. Hi.
114
00:04:29,603 --> 00:04:31,397
- I'm so surprised
to see you in here.
115
00:04:31,439 --> 00:04:34,025
This place is so overpriced.
116
00:04:34,066 --> 00:04:36,610
Nine dollars for mustard?
117
00:04:37,820 --> 00:04:39,905
- Yes, well,
it's a special occasion.
118
00:04:39,947 --> 00:04:42,116
We're splurging on an animal
who's seen the sunlight.
119
00:04:42,158 --> 00:04:43,784
- Say hi to Dawn Aunty.
- Hi.
120
00:04:43,826 --> 00:04:46,829
Your cousin Cory and uncle Bo
are looking at the bone broth.
121
00:04:46,871 --> 00:04:48,998
- Go on.
- Hey!
122
00:04:49,040 --> 00:04:51,500
- How's Bo?
- He seems smiley.
123
00:04:51,542 --> 00:04:52,793
- Having a nervous breakdown
124
00:04:52,835 --> 00:04:54,253
and being ousted
from his own company
125
00:04:54,295 --> 00:04:56,505
was the best thing
that's ever happened to him.
126
00:04:56,547 --> 00:05:00,926
He loves homeschooling Cory and
is teaching himself to craft.
127
00:05:00,968 --> 00:05:03,137
Did he craft that fun hat?
128
00:05:03,637 --> 00:05:05,139
- Still learning.
129
00:05:05,514 --> 00:05:07,516
So, what's the occasion?
130
00:05:07,558 --> 00:05:11,270
Uh, well, in a few months, I'm
going back to work, paid work.
131
00:05:11,312 --> 00:05:14,023
- Astrid, this is fantastic!
- I know.
132
00:05:14,065 --> 00:05:15,316
- Have you told Mom yet?
133
00:05:15,358 --> 00:05:17,526
She's worried you betrayed
your feminist ideals.
134
00:05:17,568 --> 00:05:18,861
- No, I didn't betray anything.
135
00:05:18,903 --> 00:05:20,571
I stayed home because James
makes more money
136
00:05:20,613 --> 00:05:22,823
because he has a valuable penis
and I have a garbage vagina.
137
00:05:22,865 --> 00:05:24,116
Please don't tell Mom
138
00:05:24,158 --> 00:05:25,826
because I really don't need
the career advice.
139
00:05:25,868 --> 00:05:27,828
- Oh, you don't wanna know
about what make-up to wear
140
00:05:27,870 --> 00:05:29,705
or how shiny your work clothes
should be?
141
00:05:29,747 --> 00:05:31,374
- No, I've already heard about
how shiny
142
00:05:31,415 --> 00:05:32,875
my at-home clothes should be.
143
00:05:32,917 --> 00:05:34,126
Speaking of Mom,
144
00:05:34,168 --> 00:05:36,212
did you get her email
about the vegan food...
145
00:05:36,253 --> 00:05:39,090
I think she read it on a blog...
146
00:05:42,009 --> 00:05:46,931
- ♪ My love must be a kind
of blind love ♪
147
00:05:50,226 --> 00:05:53,479
♪ I can't see anyone but... ♪
148
00:05:56,065 --> 00:05:58,734
- Hey, hey, hey!
- Does she know how to breathe?
149
00:05:58,776 --> 00:05:59,944
Really breathe?
150
00:05:59,985 --> 00:06:01,570
- Yes, she's an ace breather,
Bo, thank you.
151
00:06:01,862 --> 00:06:04,907
- It's natural, kiddo, all this
stuff used to be animals.
152
00:06:04,949 --> 00:06:06,158
- Okay, she's just never seen
153
00:06:06,200 --> 00:06:08,411
a decapitated animal before,
have you?
154
00:06:08,452 --> 00:06:09,495
- Oh.
155
00:06:09,537 --> 00:06:13,040
- Okay, maybe we skip
the meat for today?
156
00:06:16,293 --> 00:06:18,421
- Hey, James,
I sent you a work email.
157
00:06:18,712 --> 00:06:21,674
- You sent me a work email?
And...
158
00:06:22,341 --> 00:06:23,467
Hey, Ennis!
159
00:06:23,509 --> 00:06:26,011
You cannot send me
deep fake nudes of myself.
160
00:06:26,053 --> 00:06:28,472
- I'm an artist.
Are you confirmed for tonight?
161
00:06:28,514 --> 00:06:29,974
- Yeah, I'm gonna try
and make it, yes.
162
00:06:30,015 --> 00:06:32,560
- No, no, that is the battle-cry
of the no-show.
163
00:06:32,601 --> 00:06:33,727
- I have a family thing.
164
00:06:33,769 --> 00:06:35,271
- So, come after.
It's not complicated.
165
00:06:35,312 --> 00:06:37,314
Why am I the only one
working in this friendship?
166
00:06:37,356 --> 00:06:38,524
- Nice nudes, James.
167
00:06:38,566 --> 00:06:40,276
Hey, Marla, this is not...
This is a joke.
168
00:06:40,317 --> 00:06:42,486
Yeah, I know, relax.
Ennis already sent 'em to me.
169
00:06:42,528 --> 00:06:44,822
- How's it goin', boss?
- Considering what a goldmine
170
00:06:44,864 --> 00:06:46,532
the pandemic has been
for the grocery world,
171
00:06:46,574 --> 00:06:48,159
I'd say it's going
pretty freakin' well!
172
00:06:48,200 --> 00:06:50,870
- Except for the death
and the illness, though, right?
173
00:06:50,911 --> 00:06:53,372
- Sure. But we're opening
four new franchises
174
00:06:53,414 --> 00:06:54,915
in the next 15 months.
175
00:06:54,957 --> 00:06:56,167
I could kiss COVID.
176
00:06:56,208 --> 00:06:57,793
- That's definitely
how you get it.
177
00:06:57,835 --> 00:07:00,004
- We're gonna sweat, and we're
gonna bleed and we're gonna cry.
178
00:07:00,045 --> 00:07:01,464
And who knows
what fluids will leak?
179
00:07:01,505 --> 00:07:03,466
But once we crush
these openings,
180
00:07:03,507 --> 00:07:06,719
this gal is gonna be a VP.
181
00:07:07,094 --> 00:07:10,014
- Awesome! Is there anything
you needed?
182
00:07:10,055 --> 00:07:11,974
- Just your hard work.
Your loyalty.
183
00:07:12,016 --> 00:07:15,311
And James,
you're gonna need those balls.
184
00:07:16,103 --> 00:07:18,105
- Uh, not mine.
185
00:07:19,023 --> 00:07:21,025
- Why did she point at me
when she said fluids?
186
00:07:21,066 --> 00:07:22,359
- I'm asking Astrid.
187
00:07:22,401 --> 00:07:24,153
- Don't hide behind Astrid.
You promised you'd come
188
00:07:24,195 --> 00:07:26,530
and now you're using your family
as an excuse to suck.
189
00:07:26,572 --> 00:07:28,782
- She says I can go, it's cool.
- Great, okay!
190
00:07:28,824 --> 00:07:31,785
- Give me your buy-in
so I know you're locked in.
191
00:07:32,953 --> 00:07:34,747
It's a new policy.
192
00:07:35,789 --> 00:07:37,500
This is
a very special dinner
193
00:07:37,541 --> 00:07:39,335
because we're celebrating
Mom going back to work.
194
00:07:39,376 --> 00:07:41,795
- Yes.
- Celebration pasta.
195
00:07:41,837 --> 00:07:43,422
No meat at all, Viv.
196
00:07:43,464 --> 00:07:45,382
- I like meat.
197
00:07:45,883 --> 00:07:48,302
- Okay, 'cause this morning,
you...
198
00:07:48,344 --> 00:07:49,553
You know what? Never mind.
199
00:07:49,595 --> 00:07:51,013
Just gonna blow
right past that one.
200
00:07:51,055 --> 00:07:53,766
- It's okay. Let's raise
our glasses to Mummy
201
00:07:53,807 --> 00:07:56,435
who put her career on hold,
a big sacrifice,
202
00:07:56,477 --> 00:07:58,896
that mostly women have to make
because we live in a patriarchy,
203
00:07:58,938 --> 00:08:01,482
- James?
- Yep, let's focus. Here it is.
204
00:08:01,524 --> 00:08:03,567
- Cheers.
- The cheers!
205
00:08:03,609 --> 00:08:05,778
- The cheers, to you, and you,
and to you...
206
00:08:05,819 --> 00:08:07,947
- And to all of us.
- To all of us.
207
00:08:07,988 --> 00:08:09,740
Okay. Now, Felix...
208
00:08:09,782 --> 00:08:11,992
- Cheers! Cheers!
209
00:08:12,034 --> 00:08:15,246
- Hey, Felix. Did something
happen at school today
210
00:08:15,287 --> 00:08:17,248
that maybe made you feel proud?
211
00:08:17,289 --> 00:08:18,541
Diarrhea.
212
00:08:18,582 --> 00:08:20,668
- Felix, your father's
asking you a question.
213
00:08:20,709 --> 00:08:21,877
- Diarrhea.
214
00:08:21,919 --> 00:08:25,714
- Let's just sit down
and commence the civilized meal.
215
00:08:25,756 --> 00:08:27,424
Toilet!
216
00:08:27,466 --> 00:08:29,760
- Toilet is a toilet word, Viv.
217
00:08:32,179 --> 00:08:33,806
I'll be the first one
to admit
218
00:08:33,847 --> 00:08:36,058
that children
are naturally jerks.
219
00:08:37,268 --> 00:08:39,562
As parents, you have to stop
jerk-like behavior
220
00:08:39,603 --> 00:08:41,689
or it will get worse
and worse as they get older.
221
00:08:41,730 --> 00:08:43,315
And the world
has enough adult jerks,
222
00:08:43,357 --> 00:08:45,609
so, you know,
please do your part.
223
00:08:45,651 --> 00:08:48,279
- My name is
DJ Poopy-in-the-house!
224
00:08:48,320 --> 00:08:50,781
My name is
DJ Peepee-in-the-house!
225
00:08:50,823 --> 00:08:53,325
- We don't need to
make the bread pee and poo.
226
00:08:53,367 --> 00:08:54,868
- That's enough.
Viv, go back to your seat.
227
00:08:54,910 --> 00:08:57,496
Felix, eat your food!
- Eat your food.
228
00:08:58,247 --> 00:09:00,541
- Viv, Felix, sit down.
Let's enjoy Mummy's great meal.
229
00:09:00,583 --> 00:09:03,711
I don't want it. It's gross.
230
00:09:05,045 --> 00:09:06,839
All right, enough! Enough!
231
00:09:06,880 --> 00:09:08,966
Everybody calm down.
232
00:09:10,301 --> 00:09:13,095
Now, this is really important
to Mummy and Daddy. Understand?
233
00:09:13,137 --> 00:09:16,390
So, I promise you, that if
we just stay in our seats,
234
00:09:16,432 --> 00:09:17,683
and we don't yell at each other
235
00:09:17,725 --> 00:09:19,727
and we don't make
gross noises...
236
00:09:22,521 --> 00:09:26,609
- I promise that we can have
a really nice time.
237
00:09:26,650 --> 00:09:28,402
- I love it.
- So, how about this?
238
00:09:28,444 --> 00:09:32,156
How about we reset this dinner?
Okay? A do-over.
239
00:09:32,197 --> 00:09:34,825
- Do-over!
- Yep. Okay?
240
00:09:34,867 --> 00:09:36,869
Starting with the cheers. Okay?
241
00:09:37,286 --> 00:09:38,495
- Do-over!
- Right.
242
00:09:38,537 --> 00:09:40,831
Cheers, everybody, ready?
243
00:09:41,624 --> 00:09:42,374
Cheers.
244
00:09:42,416 --> 00:09:44,126
- Oh, my God! Okay, okay.
245
00:09:44,168 --> 00:09:45,628
Don't move,
don't move!
246
00:09:45,669 --> 00:09:47,588
Don't move,
there's glass everywhere,
247
00:09:47,630 --> 00:09:49,548
it get in your eyes,
you need your eyes.
248
00:09:49,590 --> 00:09:51,717
James!
249
00:09:51,759 --> 00:09:54,094
- Shit!
- Toilet word!
250
00:09:59,350 --> 00:10:01,727
- Well, we'll try again
when they're teenagers.
251
00:10:01,769 --> 00:10:03,187
- Do you have to go to Ennis's?
252
00:10:03,228 --> 00:10:04,438
- I already bought in,
253
00:10:04,480 --> 00:10:06,315
and he gave me a whole thing
about bailing.
254
00:10:06,357 --> 00:10:09,193
- If you stay,
I'll make it worth your while.
255
00:10:10,611 --> 00:10:12,905
- The sad thing is
that this is working on me.
256
00:10:12,946 --> 00:10:15,741
- Like a little bit of this?
- Yeah, these are all the moves.
257
00:10:15,783 --> 00:10:17,910
These are all my favorites.
258
00:10:17,951 --> 00:10:20,204
- I've got glass in my bum.
259
00:10:21,872 --> 00:10:23,499
- No, I don't think
you have glass in your bum.
260
00:10:23,540 --> 00:10:26,752
- Yes, I do. It's cutting me.
I can feel it right now!
261
00:10:26,794 --> 00:10:29,129
- It seems unlikely
'cause we were wearing pants.
262
00:10:29,171 --> 00:10:31,006
- Yeah, it seems...
- There is.
263
00:10:31,048 --> 00:10:32,841
You have to get it out.
264
00:10:33,133 --> 00:10:34,885
- Okay, okay, how about this?
265
00:10:34,927 --> 00:10:37,304
I think before Daddy goes
to have fun with his friends,
266
00:10:37,346 --> 00:10:40,015
maybe he should
check your bum for glass.
267
00:10:45,396 --> 00:10:47,815
Can be
a little depressing, but...
268
00:10:47,856 --> 00:10:48,982
Look at her.
269
00:10:49,024 --> 00:10:50,484
- Slow down.
- Not bad.
270
00:10:50,526 --> 00:10:51,694
You gotta move fast,
271
00:10:51,735 --> 00:10:53,237
or else you'll never find
what you're looking for.
272
00:10:53,278 --> 00:10:54,863
- How're you making decisions
this quick?
273
00:10:54,905 --> 00:10:56,448
What's wrong with her?
- She's wearing a sweater--
274
00:10:56,490 --> 00:10:58,534
- What about--
-She does cartwheels.
275
00:10:58,575 --> 00:11:00,661
- Can you go back?
- No, you don't want to.
276
00:11:00,703 --> 00:11:02,037
You gotta pay extra to do that.
277
00:11:02,079 --> 00:11:03,539
- Is that her dog?
- Okay, see this one?
278
00:11:03,580 --> 00:11:04,915
- Yeah?
- Yeah, you think yoga pose
279
00:11:04,957 --> 00:11:06,208
means bendy in a sexy way,
280
00:11:06,250 --> 00:11:07,710
but really it means
a lot of conversations
281
00:11:07,751 --> 00:11:09,503
about how you don't drink
enough water.
282
00:11:09,545 --> 00:11:10,713
How's Astrid?
283
00:11:11,088 --> 00:11:14,842
- No, yeah, she's great.
She's going back to work.
284
00:11:14,883 --> 00:11:16,260
We tried to celebrate tonight,
285
00:11:16,301 --> 00:11:18,429
but Felix and Viv were going
through a sabotage phase.
286
00:11:18,470 --> 00:11:21,265
- I keep telling you
having kids is a huge mistake.
287
00:11:21,306 --> 00:11:23,767
- And I thought you'd stop
telling me that once I had them.
288
00:11:23,809 --> 00:11:25,227
- Well, they keep
proving my point.
289
00:11:25,269 --> 00:11:27,354
But, unlike your kids,
I can actually help.
290
00:11:27,396 --> 00:11:29,815
I have a reservation
tomorrow night at Fauf Nine.
291
00:11:29,857 --> 00:11:31,400
It's a phenomenal new place,
but I can't go
292
00:11:31,442 --> 00:11:33,610
because my dodgeball team
made the playoffs.
293
00:11:33,652 --> 00:11:35,237
- Wait, you still play
ironic sports?
294
00:11:35,279 --> 00:11:37,322
- I take my dodgeball
very seriously.
295
00:11:37,364 --> 00:11:39,658
Try to hit me with that pillow.
- No.
296
00:11:39,700 --> 00:11:42,119
- Smart choice,
you would have missed.
297
00:11:42,494 --> 00:11:44,204
- So, this--
- Fauf--
298
00:11:44,246 --> 00:11:45,497
- All right. Is it expensive?
299
00:11:45,539 --> 00:11:47,458
'Cause last month
I got a parking ticket
300
00:11:47,499 --> 00:11:48,876
and I couldn't afford deodorant.
301
00:11:48,917 --> 00:11:50,836
- I'll tell you what.
Play your cards right tonight,
302
00:11:50,878 --> 00:11:53,881
and maybe you could win
the cash you need.
303
00:11:54,339 --> 00:11:57,468
♪
304
00:11:57,968 --> 00:12:00,137
- I need a hay.
- No, that's what sheeps do.
305
00:12:00,179 --> 00:12:02,848
Do you have any sheep?
306
00:12:04,308 --> 00:12:05,309
- Don't.
307
00:12:05,350 --> 00:12:07,019
You know where to put it!
308
00:12:07,060 --> 00:12:09,646
- That's gonna come back to
haunt you, I don't know how.
309
00:12:10,105 --> 00:12:12,274
All right, sheep for you.
310
00:12:16,612 --> 00:12:17,571
Always fun.
311
00:12:17,613 --> 00:12:19,448
I said I needed sheep!
312
00:12:23,452 --> 00:12:25,037
- Five.
- Okay, okay, okay.
313
00:12:26,330 --> 00:12:28,749
- Just so you know,
I am four points away
314
00:12:28,791 --> 00:12:30,375
from being your champion
of the evening.
315
00:12:30,417 --> 00:12:31,752
- James and I only need
one point.
316
00:12:31,794 --> 00:12:33,962
- I've faced worse odds.
Are you done?
317
00:12:34,004 --> 00:12:35,422
- I need a wheat.
- I've wheat.
318
00:12:35,464 --> 00:12:37,591
- I've wood. Wood for weed.
- I don't need wood.
319
00:12:37,633 --> 00:12:39,384
I need sheep. I need sheep.
320
00:12:39,426 --> 00:12:41,637
Okay, stop.
But if I had a wheat,
321
00:12:41,678 --> 00:12:44,223
I could build a town, you know,
322
00:12:44,264 --> 00:12:46,642
the kind of town that one
might take their wife out on.
323
00:12:46,683 --> 00:12:49,853
- Well, in this economy,
wheat will cost you a sheep.
324
00:12:49,895 --> 00:12:52,356
- Help me out here.
- That's a good price!
325
00:12:52,898 --> 00:12:55,275
You won't make the deal?
No wheat off my back.
326
00:12:55,317 --> 00:12:56,777
- Wonderful!
- What?
327
00:12:56,819 --> 00:12:59,780
I'm now able to make
the longest roads.
328
00:12:59,822 --> 00:13:01,073
- What?
- A winning move!
329
00:13:01,114 --> 00:13:02,282
- Are you serious? Where?
330
00:13:02,324 --> 00:13:03,951
- Come on.
- Don't be shy, boy.
331
00:13:03,992 --> 00:13:06,411
- I still want that reservation.
332
00:13:14,503 --> 00:13:17,256
- Wake up, wake up, wake up!
333
00:13:17,297 --> 00:13:19,049
This shouldn't
be happening.
334
00:13:19,091 --> 00:13:21,385
- Wake up, wake up, wake up!
335
00:13:21,760 --> 00:13:22,803
- Can I get an hour?
336
00:13:22,845 --> 00:13:24,263
- Yeah, I already gave you
an hour.
337
00:13:24,304 --> 00:13:26,390
- Your turn to battle the kids.
- You can't win!
338
00:13:26,431 --> 00:13:27,599
- Thirty minutes.
- No!
339
00:13:27,641 --> 00:13:28,809
You can't go out
with your friends
340
00:13:28,851 --> 00:13:30,394
and sleep till 9:30. Get him!
341
00:13:30,435 --> 00:13:32,312
- No, wait! Time!
I made a reservation
342
00:13:32,354 --> 00:13:34,857
at Fauf Nine. Very nice,
hard to get into,
343
00:13:34,898 --> 00:13:36,775
dinner, just the two of us.
344
00:13:37,150 --> 00:13:38,610
- Did you book a babysitter?
345
00:13:38,652 --> 00:13:42,155
Okay, okay. I texted
your mom, I texted your mom.
346
00:13:42,197 --> 00:13:43,407
- What?
- I...
347
00:13:43,448 --> 00:13:44,449
- The last time,
348
00:13:44,491 --> 00:13:45,868
they were eating bowls
of whipped cream
349
00:13:45,909 --> 00:13:47,369
and watching
Fast and the Furious.
350
00:13:47,411 --> 00:13:48,620
- I know, Felix ruined
the ending for me.
351
00:13:48,662 --> 00:13:49,872
- Shaw killed Seoul-Oh.
352
00:13:49,913 --> 00:13:51,874
- Yes, Shaw killed me as well,
I feel like.
353
00:13:51,915 --> 00:13:53,500
- Okay, fine.
But just so you know,
354
00:13:53,542 --> 00:13:55,043
Viv's pretending
to water a garden
355
00:13:55,085 --> 00:13:56,962
by pouring milk on the couch,
so you're dealing with that.
356
00:13:57,004 --> 00:13:59,882
- Okay.
- Oh, my God!
357
00:14:06,889 --> 00:14:10,893
- Watch me, I'm Mummy.
And I'm cleaning.
358
00:14:11,310 --> 00:14:13,145
- No, Daddy cleans too.
359
00:14:13,186 --> 00:14:15,147
It's everyone's job
to tidy the house.
360
00:14:15,188 --> 00:14:18,066
Felix, tidy the slide,
both of you clean it!
361
00:14:25,449 --> 00:14:28,160
- Hello?
- Chuck, hi, it's Astrid.
362
00:14:28,201 --> 00:14:29,745
- Hi, how are ya?
- How's the family?
363
00:14:29,786 --> 00:14:31,496
- I'm good, I'm good,
yeah, they're good.
364
00:14:31,538 --> 00:14:34,666
Listen, I was just calling
because I wanted to take you up
365
00:14:34,708 --> 00:14:35,959
on that job offer.
366
00:14:36,001 --> 00:14:38,211
- So, you're coming back?
- Yes.
367
00:14:38,253 --> 00:14:40,005
Well, that's great news!
368
00:14:40,047 --> 00:14:42,925
♪
369
00:14:52,768 --> 00:14:54,019
- Stop! Stop it! Stop it!
370
00:14:54,061 --> 00:14:55,687
- What?
- No, no, not you.
371
00:14:55,729 --> 00:14:57,564
Sorry, no, not you.
372
00:14:57,606 --> 00:14:59,983
Yes, I'll totally learn
the new software.
373
00:15:00,025 --> 00:15:02,694
- Great!
- Yeah, that would be amazing.
374
00:15:02,736 --> 00:15:04,404
Thank you.
375
00:15:07,950 --> 00:15:11,286
Hey,
I'm cleaning this part.
376
00:15:12,829 --> 00:15:14,289
Nanima's here!
377
00:15:14,331 --> 00:15:16,541
- Astrid: Hi!
- I'm here to save the day.
378
00:15:16,583 --> 00:15:18,126
- Thank you so much
for babysitting.
379
00:15:18,168 --> 00:15:20,921
You know the rules. No boys,
don't touch the thermostat.
380
00:15:20,963 --> 00:15:23,215
- This is for lunch and dinner
tomorrow.
381
00:15:23,256 --> 00:15:24,967
Aloo gobi for you, bittoo!
382
00:15:25,008 --> 00:15:27,678
- My little vegetarian!
- She's not a... What?
383
00:15:27,719 --> 00:15:29,304
- And gummy candies
for the kids.
384
00:15:29,346 --> 00:15:31,765
Have they seen the movie
Pan's Labyrinth?
385
00:15:31,807 --> 00:15:33,642
- That's not a kid's movie.
386
00:15:33,684 --> 00:15:34,977
- We'll see.
387
00:15:35,560 --> 00:15:37,813
And congratulations on your job.
388
00:15:37,854 --> 00:15:40,357
Dawn was worried you'd given up
on your feminist ideals.
389
00:15:40,399 --> 00:15:42,901
- What? No!
- Oh, I forgot to tell you.
390
00:15:42,943 --> 00:15:45,445
I ran into Christine's mom
in Hyde Park.
391
00:15:45,487 --> 00:15:47,322
- I haven't seen Christine
in 20 years.
392
00:15:47,364 --> 00:15:48,907
- Well, her brother's
a gambling addict,
393
00:15:48,949 --> 00:15:52,828
and he stole Marco's van.
So, that's where she's at.
394
00:15:53,120 --> 00:15:54,454
- Okay, I don't--
395
00:15:54,496 --> 00:15:56,707
- Okay, well, why don't you go
get changed for your big night?
396
00:15:56,748 --> 00:15:57,874
- This is what I'm wearing.
397
00:15:57,916 --> 00:15:59,418
- You don't have
something shinier?
398
00:15:59,459 --> 00:16:02,546
- Uh-oh. Is that the in-laws?
Get out of here, Nisha!
399
00:16:02,587 --> 00:16:05,298
- You ruined my daughter's life,
you sack of crap!
400
00:16:05,340 --> 00:16:07,092
- Oh, my God! Okay.
- Okay.
401
00:16:07,134 --> 00:16:09,302
- Just put a little extra
mustard on that one, this time.
402
00:16:09,344 --> 00:16:11,388
We're just having fun.
403
00:16:17,019 --> 00:16:19,604
- Are we underdressed?
- Almost always.
404
00:16:20,355 --> 00:16:25,736
- Hello, we've reservations
for eight under Ennis, I think.
405
00:16:27,070 --> 00:16:29,656
- Looks like you guys
are already here.
406
00:16:30,574 --> 00:16:32,409
- And I said, "It's more
like reodorant."
407
00:16:32,451 --> 00:16:34,119
- You know what I mean?
- Yeah.
408
00:16:34,161 --> 00:16:37,122
- Thank you very much.
- Hey, Ennis.
409
00:16:37,456 --> 00:16:39,207
- Hi.
410
00:16:42,294 --> 00:16:43,420
Right.
411
00:16:43,754 --> 00:16:45,297
I was supposed to give you
this table.
412
00:16:45,338 --> 00:16:46,590
Mm-hm.
413
00:16:46,631 --> 00:16:48,759
- But then I met Penelope here
while I was at Zara's,
414
00:16:48,800 --> 00:16:50,719
shopping for socks.
- Good evening.
415
00:16:50,761 --> 00:16:51,803
- What's this?
416
00:16:51,845 --> 00:16:53,555
- Astrid, you look great.
- Thank you.
417
00:16:53,597 --> 00:16:54,723
I just dressed up
418
00:16:54,765 --> 00:16:56,391
'cause I was looking forward
to the night out.
419
00:16:56,433 --> 00:16:58,685
- Yeah, I thought you guys
couldn't afford this place.
420
00:16:58,727 --> 00:17:00,145
- We can't.
- Yeah.
421
00:17:00,187 --> 00:17:03,523
We're only here because
you gave us the reservation.
422
00:17:04,066 --> 00:17:06,568
- Now what do you want me to do?
423
00:17:12,991 --> 00:17:14,618
James, how's your duck?
424
00:17:14,910 --> 00:17:16,995
- It's great, Ennis, thank you.
425
00:17:17,037 --> 00:17:18,663
- It's cool.
426
00:17:19,623 --> 00:17:21,500
- So, Penelope, um,
427
00:17:21,541 --> 00:17:23,877
you work at Zara?
- No, I work for an NGO.
428
00:17:23,919 --> 00:17:28,298
I help develop non-GMO enriched
rice for developing countries.
429
00:17:30,425 --> 00:17:33,095
- That's cool.
Sounds fulfilling.
430
00:17:33,136 --> 00:17:35,263
- Yeah, it really is.
How about you?
431
00:17:35,305 --> 00:17:40,102
- Oh. Job-wise, I'm a data
analyst for the city.
432
00:17:40,143 --> 00:17:42,646
Well, I was,
but now I'm just a mom.
433
00:17:42,687 --> 00:17:45,107
- No such thing as just a mom,
she's amazing.
434
00:17:45,148 --> 00:17:47,943
- You guys have kids.
I love kids.
435
00:17:47,984 --> 00:17:52,155
You do? Well, that's great.
436
00:17:52,781 --> 00:17:55,075
- Oh, my God, my mom's saying
something's wrong.
437
00:17:55,117 --> 00:17:57,911
She says it's Felix.
It's his stomach.
438
00:17:57,953 --> 00:18:00,122
It's a stabbing pain,
he's in tears!
439
00:18:00,163 --> 00:18:03,959
- Oh, my God, did he actually
eat glass last night?
440
00:18:11,258 --> 00:18:13,301
- I'll get the check.
441
00:18:19,558 --> 00:18:21,601
- So hungry.
442
00:18:26,565 --> 00:18:28,191
Yeah.
443
00:18:30,777 --> 00:18:33,822
- He didn't eat the food
after the glass broke.
444
00:18:33,864 --> 00:18:37,284
- I did. Somebody had to.
445
00:18:39,786 --> 00:18:40,912
- Do you need help?
446
00:18:40,954 --> 00:18:42,873
- Could you just hold him
for a second?
447
00:18:42,914 --> 00:18:44,708
- Yeah, sure.
- Thank you.
448
00:18:44,749 --> 00:18:46,376
- Remember when
Viv ate a spider?
449
00:18:46,418 --> 00:18:49,796
Just smashed it up with a block
and put it in her mouth.
450
00:18:49,838 --> 00:18:51,256
Like a...
451
00:18:54,718 --> 00:18:59,931
♪ I only have eyes ♪
452
00:19:01,349 --> 00:19:05,228
♪ For you ♪
453
00:19:05,687 --> 00:19:07,856
- I wanna have another baby.
454
00:19:08,231 --> 00:19:11,359
- I'll just take him back now.
455
00:19:11,401 --> 00:19:12,611
- Sure.
456
00:19:12,652 --> 00:19:13,987
- Since when?
457
00:19:14,029 --> 00:19:16,072
- Since I can't stop
thinking about it.
458
00:19:17,699 --> 00:19:19,367
We agreed on two.
And we did it!
459
00:19:19,409 --> 00:19:21,578
We get one of each gender,
it's like the perfect--
460
00:19:21,620 --> 00:19:23,455
I mean, I know
gender's a spectrum...
461
00:19:23,496 --> 00:19:26,416
Okay, but I can't shake
this feeling
462
00:19:26,458 --> 00:19:28,084
that someone is missing,
463
00:19:28,126 --> 00:19:30,545
like our family is
not totally complete.
464
00:19:30,962 --> 00:19:32,923
- Can we try getting
a guinea pig
465
00:19:32,964 --> 00:19:34,507
and see if that hits the spot?
466
00:19:34,549 --> 00:19:36,885
What about going back to work?
What about money?
467
00:19:36,927 --> 00:19:40,013
I'm almost 40, we're just
starting to go back out again.
468
00:19:40,055 --> 00:19:42,098
- I get that
it doesn't make sense.
469
00:19:42,140 --> 00:19:43,683
- I'm just telling you
how I feel.
470
00:19:43,725 --> 00:19:46,228
- And I appreciate that
and I support how you feel.
471
00:19:46,269 --> 00:19:48,104
But I feel the opposite.
472
00:19:48,146 --> 00:19:50,232
- Person: Mr. and Mrs. Berney?
- Yes.
473
00:19:50,273 --> 00:19:51,733
- I had a look at the X-rays,
474
00:19:51,775 --> 00:19:54,277
and I haven't been able
to locate any glass.
475
00:19:54,319 --> 00:19:56,488
- Yeah, we didn't find any
when we checked his bum.
476
00:19:56,529 --> 00:19:58,073
- "We."
- The intestines
477
00:19:58,114 --> 00:20:01,952
are here, and you see these
black circles here and here?
478
00:20:01,993 --> 00:20:04,913
- Why are they perfectly round?
What are the black circles?
479
00:20:04,955 --> 00:20:06,248
- It's gas.
480
00:20:06,289 --> 00:20:09,334
He just needs to vacate the gas
and he'll probably feel fine.
481
00:20:09,626 --> 00:20:12,045
- So, you're prescribing a fart?
- Yes.
482
00:20:12,087 --> 00:20:14,673
A warm bath,
or gently massaging--
483
00:20:14,714 --> 00:20:18,093
- No, no, he knows how.
He'll be thrilled.
484
00:20:18,843 --> 00:20:20,303
- Thank you.
485
00:20:21,137 --> 00:20:23,056
- Astrid: So,
are the studies right?
486
00:20:23,098 --> 00:20:25,767
Are parents less happy
than the childless people
487
00:20:25,809 --> 00:20:27,978
who have all their free time
and money to themselves?
488
00:20:28,019 --> 00:20:29,854
- Probably.
- Definitely.
489
00:20:29,896 --> 00:20:31,273
- Hey! Look at this.
490
00:20:31,314 --> 00:20:33,525
It's the who's who
of the vegan food scene.
491
00:20:33,566 --> 00:20:34,693
- You made it!
492
00:20:34,734 --> 00:20:36,486
Being
a parent can suck.
493
00:20:36,528 --> 00:20:39,239
Every injury, every heartache,
every mess, you're in charge.
494
00:20:39,281 --> 00:20:42,075
- I'm sorry you didn't get to
celebrate going back to work.
495
00:20:42,117 --> 00:20:43,410
- We're celebrating now.
496
00:20:43,451 --> 00:20:45,078
- Yes, we are. To Astrid.
497
00:20:45,120 --> 00:20:46,496
- To Astrid.
498
00:20:46,538 --> 00:20:48,707
- To Astrid.
- Cheers.
499
00:20:48,748 --> 00:20:50,208
But there are moments,
500
00:20:50,250 --> 00:20:54,421
incredible moments that
you can't find anywhere else.
501
00:20:54,754 --> 00:20:57,340
Life isn't always as fun or cool
as it was before.
502
00:20:57,382 --> 00:20:58,842
Never. Not even close.
503
00:20:58,883 --> 00:21:01,177
But those moments,
they make up for it.
504
00:21:01,219 --> 00:21:03,513
So, we just try
to have as many as we can.
505
00:21:03,555 --> 00:21:05,056
She means moments,
not kids.
506
00:21:05,098 --> 00:21:06,349
You don't know
what I mean.
507
00:21:06,391 --> 00:21:08,935
Okay, all right, that's nice.
508
00:21:09,519 --> 00:21:11,229
Okay, hi, hi.
509
00:21:12,480 --> 00:21:13,315
- Okay.
510
00:21:18,528 --> 00:21:20,196
- Try to hit me with
one of those pillows.
511
00:21:20,238 --> 00:21:21,948
- No.
- No, go ahead, give it a shot.
512
00:21:21,990 --> 00:21:23,575
See how fast I can move.
- I'll believe you.
513
00:21:23,616 --> 00:21:25,243
- I choose to believe you.
- Look ahead.
514
00:21:25,285 --> 00:21:27,162
Ready? Wanna see
how fast I can move?
515
00:21:27,203 --> 00:21:28,163
Oh.
516
00:21:28,496 --> 00:21:30,290
In the face,
see that's not allowed.
517
00:21:30,332 --> 00:21:33,668
You can't hit me in the face.
So, that's how I get you.
518
00:21:34,586 --> 00:21:36,087
- Okay.
39001
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