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3
00:00:30,943 --> 00:00:34,903
Ugh, why do we always
get cleanup duty
4
00:00:34,947 --> 00:00:36,383
when they've tortured a Reman?
5
00:00:36,427 --> 00:00:38,864
They leave behind
the biggest mess.
6
00:00:38,907 --> 00:00:42,041
Sub-Commander Vrek takes
pleasure in our misery.
7
00:00:42,085 --> 00:00:44,348
Hopefully, he doesn't
get too comfortable,
8
00:00:44,391 --> 00:00:47,046
for soon my plans
will come to fruition
9
00:00:47,090 --> 00:00:49,614
and his life will be disrupted.
10
00:00:49,657 --> 00:00:52,834
You are betraying
Sub-Commander Vrek?
11
00:00:52,878 --> 00:00:54,358
That is a pity
12
00:00:54,401 --> 00:00:57,448
because I am already
betraying him
13
00:00:57,491 --> 00:01:01,147
and my plans will come
to fruition first.
14
00:01:01,191 --> 00:01:03,889
[scoffs] Oh, please,
don't make me scoff.
15
00:01:03,932 --> 00:01:05,717
Your plans are
barely even schemes.
16
00:01:05,760 --> 00:01:08,763
You wouldn't know a
scheme from a conspiracy.
17
00:01:08,807 --> 00:01:10,548
- [alert chiming]
- Ooh, an alert.
18
00:01:10,591 --> 00:01:12,680
Our sinister plans
will have to wait.
19
00:01:12,724 --> 00:01:14,247
[chuckles]
20
00:01:14,291 --> 00:01:17,207
Ugh, Reman juice
never comes out.
21
00:01:17,250 --> 00:01:18,338
Status report.
22
00:01:18,382 --> 00:01:20,384
An unknown ship seems to have
23
00:01:20,427 --> 00:01:21,907
intentionally blocked our path.
24
00:01:21,950 --> 00:01:23,474
VREK: How did they detect us?
25
00:01:23,517 --> 00:01:27,433
Assassination plots against me
are one thing, but sabotage?
26
00:01:27,478 --> 00:01:29,741
Is this your doing, Malok?
27
00:01:29,784 --> 00:01:31,308
How dare you.
28
00:01:31,351 --> 00:01:34,049
Of course I crave your
demise, but not like...
29
00:01:34,093 --> 00:01:36,356
Silence. I've been stabbing
commanders in the back
30
00:01:36,400 --> 00:01:39,229
since before your mother
killed her first traitor.
31
00:01:39,272 --> 00:01:40,403
Wipe this crumb
32
00:01:40,447 --> 00:01:41,883
from our path so I can focus
33
00:01:41,927 --> 00:01:43,581
on being suspicious.
34
00:01:43,624 --> 00:01:46,453
Commander, our systems...
They're not responding!
35
00:01:46,497 --> 00:01:48,412
That's impossible.
Fire disruptors!
36
00:01:48,455 --> 00:01:50,979
No, it's true. Our
shields are deactivating.
37
00:01:51,022 --> 00:01:52,198
Go to cloak! [gasps]
38
00:01:56,463 --> 00:01:57,986
[all scream]
39
00:02:06,038 --> 00:02:08,040
?
40
00:02:24,404 --> 00:02:26,406
?
41
00:02:56,480 --> 00:02:58,482
?
42
00:03:17,457 --> 00:03:19,329
[Shaxs screams]
43
00:03:19,372 --> 00:03:21,026
Let me die!
44
00:03:21,069 --> 00:03:24,508
No, no, no. Stay with me, Shaxs.
You're gonna get through this.
45
00:03:24,551 --> 00:03:26,205
We're exploring the
galactic frontier,
46
00:03:26,249 --> 00:03:27,815
we need to stay flexible.
47
00:03:27,859 --> 00:03:30,340
- [grunts]
- Wow, you're really tight today.
48
00:03:30,383 --> 00:03:32,037
What's got you so tense, amigo?
49
00:03:32,080 --> 00:03:34,866
[groans] One minute,
T'Ana's all over me,
50
00:03:34,909 --> 00:03:36,824
the next, she says
I'm too clingy
51
00:03:36,868 --> 00:03:38,454
and she won't come out
from under the bed.
52
00:03:38,478 --> 00:03:40,891
Have you tried scratching your
fingers on the covers and going
53
00:03:40,915 --> 00:03:42,371
- "pss-pss-pss-pss"?
- Of course I have!
54
00:03:42,395 --> 00:03:45,093
[grunts] How's it going
with the new lieutenants?
55
00:03:45,137 --> 00:03:47,226
- [grunts]
- Good, except for Mariner.
56
00:03:47,270 --> 00:03:49,359
- Mm-hmm.
- I've got her right where I want her.
57
00:03:49,402 --> 00:03:51,317
She thinks she knows
the score, but trust me,
58
00:03:51,360 --> 00:03:53,406
she won't be my
problem for long.
59
00:03:53,449 --> 00:03:55,495
- [both laugh]
- [groans]
60
00:03:55,539 --> 00:03:58,150
- Hot fudge sundaes after this?
- Oh, yeah.
61
00:03:58,193 --> 00:04:00,065
[laughs] Cheat day.
62
00:04:02,067 --> 00:04:03,373
[sighs]
63
00:04:03,416 --> 00:04:06,158
We put a lot of light-years
on these orange slabs.
64
00:04:06,201 --> 00:04:08,552
[sniffles] I promised myself
I wouldn't get emotional.
65
00:04:08,595 --> 00:04:09,988
Aw, how could you not?
66
00:04:10,031 --> 00:04:11,642
We spent so much
time hanging out,
67
00:04:11,685 --> 00:04:14,122
staying up late ranking
captains by cuteness,
68
00:04:14,166 --> 00:04:16,560
swapping bodies because
of those cosmic rays.
69
00:04:16,603 --> 00:04:18,865
[shudders] We learned too much
about each other that day.
70
00:04:18,910 --> 00:04:21,173
I'm even gonna miss the dent
I made from all the times
71
00:04:21,216 --> 00:04:23,567
I slammed my head on the
ceiling during a red alert.
72
00:04:23,610 --> 00:04:25,351
[sniffles] Goodbye, Denty.
73
00:04:25,395 --> 00:04:26,807
You okay, Mariner?
Need any help packing?
74
00:04:26,831 --> 00:04:28,572
No thanks.
75
00:04:28,615 --> 00:04:30,027
Ransom's just gonna knock me
back down to ensign anyway.
76
00:04:30,051 --> 00:04:31,662
He promoted you last week.
77
00:04:31,705 --> 00:04:33,770
I just heard him bragging to
Shaxs that he's messing with me.
78
00:04:33,794 --> 00:04:35,492
- What? Why?
- I mean, who knows. His brain
79
00:04:35,535 --> 00:04:37,644
is, like, the only part of
his body he doesn't work out.
80
00:04:37,668 --> 00:04:39,931
But didn't he say he was
going to support you?
81
00:04:39,974 --> 00:04:42,542
No, they always do, and then
the second I speak my mind? Bam.
82
00:04:42,586 --> 00:04:44,152
Right back to being an ensign.
83
00:04:44,196 --> 00:04:46,217
They always think it's,
like, a learning experience.
84
00:04:46,241 --> 00:04:47,895
Wait, is he dumb or
playing mind games?
85
00:04:47,939 --> 00:04:49,767
Well, who cares. I'm
not falling for it.
86
00:04:49,810 --> 00:04:52,596
Ransom's just waiting for
me to mess up, huh? Fine.
87
00:04:52,639 --> 00:04:54,598
I'm gonna become an
insubordination supernova
88
00:04:54,641 --> 00:04:56,034
and control my own fate.
89
00:04:56,077 --> 00:04:58,601
But you're not actually gonna
blow anything up, right?
90
00:04:58,645 --> 00:05:00,778
No. I'm gonna talk
back, break the rules,
91
00:05:00,821 --> 00:05:02,886
crack some inappropriate jokes
in front of an ambassador.
92
00:05:02,910 --> 00:05:06,566
When I get demoted, it'll
be because I earned it.
93
00:05:06,610 --> 00:05:08,065
Well, that should
prove to be a disaster.
94
00:05:08,089 --> 00:05:09,153
Should we go check
out our rooms?
95
00:05:09,177 --> 00:05:11,397
Yeah, come on
Rutherfor... Oh, right.
96
00:05:11,441 --> 00:05:12,616
I'm sorry.
97
00:05:12,659 --> 00:05:15,140
You guys go ahead. I'm
still a lowly ensign.
98
00:05:15,183 --> 00:05:17,447
Ugh, I totally forgot you
didn't get promoted with us.
99
00:05:17,490 --> 00:05:19,536
You exude lieutenant
junior grade energy.
100
00:05:19,579 --> 00:05:21,189
[sighs] I don't know
if I'm going to like
101
00:05:21,233 --> 00:05:23,298
not bunking five feet away from
you. I mean, how will I sleep
102
00:05:23,322 --> 00:05:25,455
without someone muttering
about the warp threshold?
103
00:05:25,498 --> 00:05:26,978
Aw, Tendi, don't worry,
104
00:05:27,021 --> 00:05:28,956
I'll just get a promotion
today so I can join you guys.
105
00:05:28,980 --> 00:05:31,591
I... don't know
if it's that easy.
106
00:05:31,635 --> 00:05:33,550
I just have to do some
amazing engineering.
107
00:05:33,593 --> 00:05:35,116
How hard could it be?
108
00:05:35,160 --> 00:05:37,423
Oof. What I would give
for his confidence.
109
00:05:37,467 --> 00:05:39,867
Huh. Maybe you'd have it if you
didn't hit your head so much.
110
00:05:39,904 --> 00:05:42,428
[gasps] Don't say stuff
like that in front of Denty.
111
00:05:42,472 --> 00:05:43,908
[Tendi laughs]
112
00:05:52,264 --> 00:05:54,005
What up, nerds?
113
00:05:54,048 --> 00:05:55,025
Who's ready to get mission-y?
114
00:05:55,049 --> 00:05:56,834
Almost on time,
Mariner. Well done.
115
00:05:56,877 --> 00:05:58,879
This is Ensign Gary's
first away mission,
116
00:05:58,923 --> 00:06:01,447
so I'd like you to take him
under your wing. You know,
117
00:06:01,491 --> 00:06:03,101
once you change
into your uniform.
118
00:06:03,144 --> 00:06:05,495
No, you know, I thought
I'd keep it "caszh" today.
119
00:06:05,538 --> 00:06:08,106
Simple mission, simple
outfit. This guy gets it.
120
00:06:08,149 --> 00:06:10,978
Okay. Speaking of the mission,
121
00:06:11,022 --> 00:06:13,546
please fill Ensign Gary
in on the particulars.
122
00:06:13,590 --> 00:06:15,374
Can do, hoss. Boom.
123
00:06:15,418 --> 00:06:17,681
Today we're dealing
with a classic "menage."
124
00:06:17,724 --> 00:06:19,509
- "Menage"?
- A menagerie.
125
00:06:19,552 --> 00:06:21,772
Well, it's basically
just a big-ass alien zoo
126
00:06:21,815 --> 00:06:23,556
full of aliens run
by another alien.
127
00:06:23,600 --> 00:06:25,186
This one scooped up
a couple of humans...
128
00:06:25,210 --> 00:06:26,994
[short chuckle]
"by accident," so
129
00:06:27,038 --> 00:06:28,407
we got to bust them
the [bleep] out.
130
00:06:28,431 --> 00:06:30,607
Oh, I-I didn't know
it would be dangerous.
131
00:06:30,650 --> 00:06:34,349
It's not. And this place has
a strict no-weapons policy.
132
00:06:34,393 --> 00:06:36,264
Eh, menageries are
always capturing humans
133
00:06:36,308 --> 00:06:38,092
then turning them back
over to Starfleet.
134
00:06:38,136 --> 00:06:41,095
We'll be in and out,
no biggie. Right, Jack?
135
00:06:41,139 --> 00:06:42,706
Let's just get in the shuttle.
136
00:06:42,749 --> 00:06:44,534
Wait, when you're
a lieutenant JG
137
00:06:44,577 --> 00:06:46,231
you can call him Jack?
138
00:06:46,274 --> 00:06:47,556
I always call him Jack
because, you know,
139
00:06:47,580 --> 00:06:48,973
socially, we're equals.
140
00:06:49,016 --> 00:06:50,409
Right, Jack?
141
00:06:50,452 --> 00:06:51,889
We're leaving now.
142
00:06:51,932 --> 00:06:53,717
- [chuckles]
- BOIMLER: Oh, boy,
143
00:06:53,760 --> 00:06:55,738
Mirror Universe Archer, you're
gonna love our new room.
144
00:06:55,762 --> 00:06:57,721
Aah...
145
00:06:57,764 --> 00:07:00,419
[groans]
146
00:07:00,463 --> 00:07:02,029
The nacelle is right there?
147
00:07:02,073 --> 00:07:03,727
Okay,
148
00:07:03,770 --> 00:07:05,598
not the best view,
149
00:07:05,642 --> 00:07:07,948
but I'm sure I'll
get used to it.
150
00:07:07,992 --> 00:07:10,037
Aah! Lil' Archer! Ah...
151
00:07:13,171 --> 00:07:14,389
Take her in nice and easy.
152
00:07:14,433 --> 00:07:18,045
Aye aye, sir. Nice and easy.
153
00:07:19,656 --> 00:07:21,329
- What are you doing?!
- Slow down, slow down,
154
00:07:21,353 --> 00:07:22,180
slow down!
155
00:07:22,223 --> 00:07:23,616
[grunts]
156
00:07:24,791 --> 00:07:25,879
[exclaims]
157
00:07:25,923 --> 00:07:27,402
I don't want to die!
158
00:07:27,446 --> 00:07:29,492
[screams]
159
00:07:31,711 --> 00:07:34,409
- Was that nice and easy enough?
- That...
160
00:07:34,452 --> 00:07:37,282
was some great piloting.
Let's get to work.
161
00:07:37,325 --> 00:07:41,025
[yelps] I need to
replicate some new pants.
162
00:07:42,679 --> 00:07:44,811
Oh-ho, greetings.
163
00:07:44,855 --> 00:07:46,334
Narj is happy to welcome you
164
00:07:46,378 --> 00:07:49,773
to Narj's Miraculous
Menagerarium,
165
00:07:49,816 --> 00:07:51,775
recently voted one of the
top thousand menageries
166
00:07:51,818 --> 00:07:52,993
in the quadrant.
167
00:07:53,037 --> 00:07:54,997
- [whinnies] - Narj will
be sad to lose the humans.
168
00:07:55,039 --> 00:07:56,736
They're incredibly popular.
169
00:07:56,780 --> 00:07:58,584
How did they even get locked
up here in the first place?
170
00:07:58,608 --> 00:08:00,740
Accidentally scooped up
with a shipment of bipedals.
171
00:08:00,784 --> 00:08:02,046
[laughs]
172
00:08:02,089 --> 00:08:04,831
Narj has to admit that
Narj does have a hard time
173
00:08:04,875 --> 00:08:06,398
telling non-botanical
creatures apart.
174
00:08:06,441 --> 00:08:07,834
[laughs] Happens all the time.
175
00:08:07,878 --> 00:08:09,923
Humans are always getting
stuck in menageries.
176
00:08:09,967 --> 00:08:12,012
But don't worry, I brought
my best team with me.
177
00:08:12,056 --> 00:08:14,972
We'll be out of your
leaves lickity split.
178
00:08:15,015 --> 00:08:17,278
His best team? What the hell
is that supposed to mean?
179
00:08:17,322 --> 00:08:19,106
I guess the commander likes us.
180
00:08:19,150 --> 00:08:21,500
What? No, he doesn't.
He's messing with me.
181
00:08:21,544 --> 00:08:22,980
He's setting me
up for humiliation
182
00:08:23,023 --> 00:08:24,087
when he comes down on me later.
183
00:08:24,111 --> 00:08:26,723
Are you guys breaking
up or something?
184
00:08:26,766 --> 00:08:28,855
Yeah, we are, as coworkers.
185
00:08:28,899 --> 00:08:30,465
And we're gonna
force it right now.
186
00:08:30,509 --> 00:08:31,815
I'm having a little trouble
187
00:08:31,858 --> 00:08:32,879
decoding the dynamic here,
188
00:08:32,903 --> 00:08:35,340
but I'd really like
to be left out of it.
189
00:08:39,649 --> 00:08:40,866
Hey, Narj.
190
00:08:40,911 --> 00:08:42,652
What got you in the
prison business, huh?
191
00:08:42,695 --> 00:08:44,654
Just a cruel weirdo who
loves locking people up?
192
00:08:44,697 --> 00:08:47,091
A prison is a place
for criminals.
193
00:08:47,134 --> 00:08:50,311
- I've given these sweet creatures a safe home.
- What about this little guy?
194
00:08:50,355 --> 00:08:52,618
He doesn't deserve to be
in your [bleep]-up hobby.
195
00:08:52,662 --> 00:08:54,664
NARJ: Hobby? The Moopsy
is Narj's favorite.
196
00:08:54,707 --> 00:08:56,056
Moopsy.
197
00:08:56,100 --> 00:08:57,500
Do you imprison
everything you like?
198
00:08:57,536 --> 00:08:59,756
- Of course.
- [laughs] Mariner,
199
00:08:59,799 --> 00:09:01,888
it's not our place to
judge the menagerie.
200
00:09:01,932 --> 00:09:03,716
We're just here to
collect the humans.
201
00:09:03,760 --> 00:09:05,109
No, you're here
to collect humans.
202
00:09:05,152 --> 00:09:07,154
I'm here to behuman,
203
00:09:07,198 --> 00:09:09,069
which means calling
bull[bleep] when I see it.
204
00:09:09,113 --> 00:09:10,636
Narj does not understand.
205
00:09:10,680 --> 00:09:12,769
Narj abides by Federation law.
206
00:09:12,812 --> 00:09:15,075
[chuckles] Don't worry
about it. She's a firebrand,
207
00:09:15,119 --> 00:09:16,990
but I trust her with my life.
208
00:09:17,034 --> 00:09:18,731
No, you're not
getting in my head.
209
00:09:18,775 --> 00:09:20,603
Moopsy.
210
00:09:27,914 --> 00:09:29,718
And I can't wait until we're
the same rank again because then
211
00:09:29,742 --> 00:09:31,918
we can get back to praising
people behind their backs.
212
00:09:31,962 --> 00:09:34,921
[chuckles] I think Boimler's
gonna be a great lieutenant.
213
00:09:34,965 --> 00:09:36,725
I don't want you to pressure
yourself to get a promotion
214
00:09:36,749 --> 00:09:39,056
just so we can hang
out. It can take years.
215
00:09:39,099 --> 00:09:41,972
Don't worry, I've been working
on something pretty impressive.
216
00:09:42,015 --> 00:09:43,451
Billups is gonna love it.
217
00:09:43,495 --> 00:09:45,932
Commander Billups. Can I
run something by you, sir?
218
00:09:45,976 --> 00:09:47,804
Of course,
Mr. Rutherford. What's up?
219
00:09:47,847 --> 00:09:49,247
For the past year,
I've been working
220
00:09:49,283 --> 00:09:50,981
to decrease vibration
in the warp manifold
221
00:09:51,024 --> 00:09:53,244
by a factor of .05.
222
00:09:53,287 --> 00:09:55,159
.05? That can't be right.
223
00:09:55,202 --> 00:09:57,683
Well, it wasn't easy, but with
a little ingenuity... [chuckles]
224
00:09:57,727 --> 00:09:59,008
BILLUPS: No, I mean
it can't be right
225
00:09:59,032 --> 00:10:00,947
because, a few minutes
ago, Ensign Livik
226
00:10:00,991 --> 00:10:03,689
decreased the vibration
by a factor of .06.
227
00:10:03,733 --> 00:10:05,125
Ensign Livik? Who's that?
228
00:10:05,169 --> 00:10:06,407
- The new guy.
- [whooping, cheering]
229
00:10:06,431 --> 00:10:07,954
[chanting]: Livik! Livik!
230
00:10:07,998 --> 00:10:09,564
Livik! Livik!
231
00:10:09,608 --> 00:10:10,740
Livik.
232
00:10:10,783 --> 00:10:12,785
[groaning]
233
00:10:17,268 --> 00:10:19,879
Ha! Stupid bussard light.
234
00:10:19,923 --> 00:10:21,359
You ain't so tough now.
235
00:10:21,402 --> 00:10:22,969
I'll tell you, if
Livik keeps this up,
236
00:10:23,013 --> 00:10:24,294
he'll have a
promotion in no time.
237
00:10:24,318 --> 00:10:25,600
Let's fire up his
protocol right now.
238
00:10:25,624 --> 00:10:27,887
I want to see that
.06 in action.
239
00:10:27,931 --> 00:10:30,107
[screaming]
240
00:10:31,369 --> 00:10:32,849
Help.
241
00:10:37,027 --> 00:10:38,158
And right this way.
242
00:10:38,202 --> 00:10:40,073
Hello, humans.
243
00:10:40,117 --> 00:10:42,597
Narj hopes you have enjoyed
your stay in the "menage."
244
00:10:42,641 --> 00:10:45,818
Now, it is time for you to
return to your natural habitat.
245
00:10:45,862 --> 00:10:47,777
I know you're taking a
hit losing these guys.
246
00:10:47,820 --> 00:10:49,189
We appreciate the
positive attitude.
247
00:10:49,213 --> 00:10:51,824
Not to worry. My
real moneymakers
248
00:10:51,868 --> 00:10:53,957
are the Pyrithian Swamp
Gobblers over there.
249
00:10:54,000 --> 00:10:56,089
[roars]
250
00:10:56,133 --> 00:10:57,569
[whines]
251
00:10:57,612 --> 00:10:58,918
Moopsy.
252
00:10:58,962 --> 00:11:00,267
Hm?
253
00:11:00,311 --> 00:11:02,008
Oh, [bleep]! The
Moopsy is free!
254
00:11:02,052 --> 00:11:04,010
Oh, no, your cuddliest
prisoner is loose.
255
00:11:04,054 --> 00:11:05,403
Whatever shall we do?
256
00:11:05,446 --> 00:11:07,013
NARJ: You don't understand.
257
00:11:07,057 --> 00:11:08,623
Everything here is
incredibly dangerous.
258
00:11:08,667 --> 00:11:09,973
MOOPSY: Moopsy.
259
00:11:10,016 --> 00:11:11,602
RANSOM: Can't be worse
than the Swamp Gobblers.
260
00:11:11,626 --> 00:11:14,499
Of course it's worse!
They only gobble you.
261
00:11:14,542 --> 00:11:16,240
The Moopsy drinks your bones!
262
00:11:16,283 --> 00:11:17,981
How does something drink bones?
263
00:11:19,243 --> 00:11:20,723
[roars]
264
00:11:21,724 --> 00:11:22,942
Holy [bleep]!
265
00:11:22,986 --> 00:11:24,639
NARJ: Run! Run for your lives!
266
00:11:24,683 --> 00:11:27,338
[others screaming]
267
00:11:30,471 --> 00:11:32,473
[fussing]
268
00:11:32,517 --> 00:11:34,345
Moopsy.
269
00:11:34,388 --> 00:11:36,410
RUTHERFORD: Come on, come on,
come on, show me that sweet
270
00:11:36,434 --> 00:11:37,957
incremental improvement.
271
00:11:38,001 --> 00:11:39,263
Yes!
272
00:11:39,306 --> 00:11:41,308
Commander Billups? You
might want to sit down.
273
00:11:41,352 --> 00:11:43,049
I increased the power output
274
00:11:43,093 --> 00:11:45,704
of the Tucker Tubes by
seven pico-cochrans.
275
00:11:45,748 --> 00:11:47,314
That's great, Rutherford.
276
00:11:47,358 --> 00:11:49,336
I just hope those adjustments
can apply to the Billups Tubes.
277
00:11:49,360 --> 00:11:50,404
The what now?
278
00:11:50,448 --> 00:11:52,363
Ensign Livik figured
out how to add
279
00:11:52,406 --> 00:11:55,018
a third tube without triggering
a Heisenberg collapse.
280
00:11:55,061 --> 00:11:56,236
A third tube?
281
00:11:56,280 --> 00:11:59,022
Yeah, and he named
it the Billups Tubes.
282
00:11:59,065 --> 00:12:00,588
[laughs] Classic Livik.
283
00:12:00,632 --> 00:12:02,044
-I-I don't even know what
we use these for, -[grunts]
284
00:12:02,068 --> 00:12:02,982
but I love them.
285
00:12:03,026 --> 00:12:04,854
- GROUP [chanting]: Livik! Livik!
- Livik.
286
00:12:06,159 --> 00:12:09,641
Wow, so close to the holodecks.
This is gonna be awesome.
287
00:12:09,684 --> 00:12:12,905
[sighs] That's more like it.
288
00:12:12,949 --> 00:12:14,994
Thanks for helping me
get my new quarters, sir.
289
00:12:15,038 --> 00:12:16,648
Happy to help, baby bear.
290
00:12:16,691 --> 00:12:19,172
Well, have fun getting
settled in. I've got to run.
291
00:12:19,216 --> 00:12:21,740
Dr. T'Ana and I have a
date on the holodeck.
292
00:12:21,784 --> 00:12:23,176
Have fun.
293
00:12:23,220 --> 00:12:25,526
You ready to get disgusting?
294
00:12:25,570 --> 00:12:28,225
Has that ever
stopped you before?
295
00:12:31,271 --> 00:12:33,534
T'ANA: Computer, activate
T'Ana program 35.
296
00:12:33,578 --> 00:12:37,016
Uh, how thin are these walls?
297
00:12:37,060 --> 00:12:38,254
ROBIN HOOD: With
me, my merry men.
298
00:12:38,278 --> 00:12:39,976
We must make haste to the castle
299
00:12:40,019 --> 00:12:41,760
to save the Maid Marion.
300
00:12:41,804 --> 00:12:43,501
Ow! What are you doing?
301
00:12:43,544 --> 00:12:46,112
T'ANA: Shut your [bleep]
face. I'm Robin Hood now.
302
00:12:46,156 --> 00:12:48,636
Toodley doo! Shaxs,
hold him down.
303
00:12:48,680 --> 00:12:50,421
SHAXS: You've already
hurt him pretty bad.
304
00:12:50,464 --> 00:12:52,858
- T'ANA: Kick his head!
- ROBIN HOOD: Help! A cat
305
00:12:52,902 --> 00:12:56,296
- has stolen my hat and arrows.
- [thumping]
306
00:12:56,340 --> 00:12:58,646
SHAXS: Can't we just do the
program as intended for once?
307
00:12:58,690 --> 00:13:00,431
T'ANA: Oh!
308
00:13:00,474 --> 00:13:02,583
- [loud banging] - [sighs, clears
throat] - [microphone feedback]
309
00:13:02,607 --> 00:13:05,088
FREEMAN: And now
that I am president
310
00:13:05,131 --> 00:13:06,524
-of all Starfleet, -[groans]
311
00:13:06,567 --> 00:13:08,134
allow me to present
312
00:13:08,178 --> 00:13:10,920
my inaugural
scatting. [scatting]
313
00:13:10,963 --> 00:13:13,661
Why is there a room
between two holodecks?
314
00:13:13,705 --> 00:13:15,291
- T'ANA: Don't make me arrow you!
- [scatting continues]
315
00:13:15,315 --> 00:13:16,534
SHAXS: Ow! Stop that.
316
00:13:16,577 --> 00:13:18,275
- T'ANA: Make me!
- SHAXS: Ow!
317
00:13:18,318 --> 00:13:20,122
T'ANA: I steal from the
[bleep] and give to my [bleep]!
318
00:13:20,146 --> 00:13:22,105
[Narj screaming]
319
00:13:25,151 --> 00:13:26,283
[fussing]
320
00:13:26,326 --> 00:13:27,980
Moopsy.
321
00:13:28,024 --> 00:13:29,503
[all panting]
322
00:13:29,547 --> 00:13:31,027
[screams]
323
00:13:33,029 --> 00:13:34,465
[thud]
324
00:13:34,508 --> 00:13:36,771
[grunts]
325
00:13:36,815 --> 00:13:39,774
So much... [gasps]
for these new pants.
326
00:13:39,818 --> 00:13:40,969
MARINER: Uh, no-weapons policy
327
00:13:40,993 --> 00:13:42,995
in a death-trap
zoo? [bleep] genius.
328
00:13:43,039 --> 00:13:46,042
- What's your problem?
- Do I really have to say it?
329
00:13:46,085 --> 00:13:47,739
Wait, you think I
let that thing out?
330
00:13:47,782 --> 00:13:49,456
You've been pulling
insubordinate crap all day.
331
00:13:49,480 --> 00:13:50,611
Oh, that is rich.
332
00:13:50,655 --> 00:13:51,656
You're the one who let
333
00:13:51,699 --> 00:13:53,266
a bone-eating monster
out of its cage.
334
00:13:53,310 --> 00:13:54,591
Uh, Narj will make
sure the Moopsy
335
00:13:54,615 --> 00:13:56,139
is still attacking the door.
336
00:13:56,182 --> 00:13:57,551
Yeah, I've been pushing
your buttons, because
337
00:13:57,575 --> 00:13:59,379
I knew you were looking
for a reason to demote me,
338
00:13:59,403 --> 00:14:01,120
and of course it's for
something I didn't even do.
339
00:14:01,144 --> 00:14:02,623
Wait, why would I
want to demote you?
340
00:14:02,667 --> 00:14:05,757
Gee, I don't know, how about
our entire working relationship?
341
00:14:05,800 --> 00:14:07,237
What? I'm a good boss.
342
00:14:07,280 --> 00:14:09,120
You stabbed me in the
foot with a battle blade,
343
00:14:09,152 --> 00:14:12,329
you-you turned into a giant
head and tried to eat me,
344
00:14:12,372 --> 00:14:13,784
you tried to trick
me into messing up
345
00:14:13,808 --> 00:14:15,569
- on that space elevator...
- That was an orbital lift.
346
00:14:15,593 --> 00:14:17,856
And then, after you promised
you would believe in me,
347
00:14:17,900 --> 00:14:19,094
I heard you tell
Shaxs in the gym
348
00:14:19,118 --> 00:14:20,946
that I wasn't gonna be
your problem anymore.
349
00:14:20,990 --> 00:14:23,079
W-What? The gym?
You heard that?
350
00:14:23,122 --> 00:14:24,602
Ha! You admit it.
351
00:14:24,645 --> 00:14:27,170
All I meant is that you're
not gonna be my problem
352
00:14:27,213 --> 00:14:29,452
because I'm not gonna take the
bait with your insubordination.
353
00:14:29,476 --> 00:14:31,217
Bait? What-what are
you talking about?
354
00:14:31,261 --> 00:14:32,281
Ugh, it's all in your file.
355
00:14:32,305 --> 00:14:34,046
You've been promoted
a dozen times,
356
00:14:34,090 --> 00:14:36,179
then you always get
demoted for acting out.
357
00:14:36,222 --> 00:14:38,113
- Yeah, 'cause I'm a, you know, I'm a free spirt.
- No.
358
00:14:38,137 --> 00:14:40,444
Because you're manipulating
your commanding officers.
359
00:14:40,487 --> 00:14:42,465
I'm gonna be the first one
who doesn't fall for it.
360
00:14:42,489 --> 00:14:44,013
Trust me, it's not easy.
361
00:14:44,056 --> 00:14:46,450
[scoffs] I do not
try to get demoted.
362
00:14:46,493 --> 00:14:48,452
What have you been
doing all day?
363
00:14:48,495 --> 00:14:50,454
No. I... I was... You...
364
00:14:50,497 --> 00:14:52,412
Uh... Okay, fine,
that was just today.
365
00:14:52,456 --> 00:14:54,806
- You always do.
- No, I don't. I...
366
00:14:54,849 --> 00:14:57,156
Shut up. [sighs]
367
00:14:57,200 --> 00:14:59,158
- Why would I do that?
- I don't know.
368
00:14:59,202 --> 00:15:02,074
But I'm sorry to say you still
have my unwavering support,
369
00:15:02,118 --> 00:15:03,641
no matter how hard you make it.
370
00:15:03,684 --> 00:15:05,425
[sighs]
371
00:15:05,469 --> 00:15:06,861
I didn't let the Moopsy out.
372
00:15:06,905 --> 00:15:08,602
I believe you.
373
00:15:08,646 --> 00:15:10,561
Okay. Thank you.
374
00:15:10,604 --> 00:15:12,911
I'm glad you two worked
your whole thing out,
375
00:15:12,955 --> 00:15:15,305
but can we maybe focus on
the bone-drinking monster
376
00:15:15,348 --> 00:15:17,350
this plant guy
probably set loose?
377
00:15:17,394 --> 00:15:19,570
You accuse Narj
of Moopsy freeing?
378
00:15:19,613 --> 00:15:21,311
Narj would never
do such a thing.
379
00:15:21,354 --> 00:15:24,227
Not even if we got killed and
you kept your valuable humans?
380
00:15:24,270 --> 00:15:26,551
Plus, you're a tree... you
probably don't even have bones.
381
00:15:26,577 --> 00:15:29,014
Ridiculous! Narj is
ossified. Narj...
382
00:15:29,058 --> 00:15:30,146
- [gasps]
- Hm?
383
00:15:30,189 --> 00:15:32,278
Moopsy.
384
00:15:32,322 --> 00:15:33,583
- [growls]
- [screaming]
385
00:15:34,454 --> 00:15:37,240
GARY: It's chugging him!
386
00:15:39,982 --> 00:15:41,722
Wait, the door.
387
00:15:43,289 --> 00:15:45,509
- [yawns]
- Phew, no ladders.
388
00:15:45,552 --> 00:15:47,182
Now it can't get back
through those vents.
389
00:15:47,206 --> 00:15:49,817
Yeah. Now it's trapped in the...
390
00:15:49,861 --> 00:15:52,907
station's main control room.
391
00:15:54,387 --> 00:15:55,998
Moopsy.
392
00:16:09,228 --> 00:16:10,795
Ah, this is perfect.
393
00:16:10,838 --> 00:16:12,884
A nice, dark Jefferies Tube
394
00:16:12,927 --> 00:16:15,713
where we can't hear anyone
decapitate Peter Pan.
395
00:16:15,756 --> 00:16:17,932
Ah, this is much
better than the bunks.
396
00:16:17,976 --> 00:16:19,282
- Hey, Boimler.
- Aah!
397
00:16:19,325 --> 00:16:20,283
What you doing in here?
398
00:16:20,326 --> 00:16:21,588
Hey, Rutherford.
399
00:16:21,632 --> 00:16:25,288
Uh, I live here now. You
doing a systems check?
400
00:16:25,331 --> 00:16:26,917
Nah, I'm trying to find a way
to diffuse heat conduction
401
00:16:26,941 --> 00:16:28,291
by a few nanojoules.
402
00:16:28,334 --> 00:16:30,423
Oh, some ensign just
came through here
403
00:16:30,467 --> 00:16:32,425
doing the exact same thing.
404
00:16:32,469 --> 00:16:34,186
Seemed like a real
wunderkind. I was impressed.
405
00:16:34,210 --> 00:16:35,559
[scoffs] Livik.
406
00:16:35,602 --> 00:16:38,475
Leave some minor improvements
for the rest of us, guy!
407
00:16:38,518 --> 00:16:40,085
- Dinner later?
- Sure.
408
00:16:41,434 --> 00:16:43,741
[Gary screaming]
409
00:16:43,784 --> 00:16:45,308
Hey, calm down.
410
00:16:45,351 --> 00:16:47,919
You calm down! If you two
hadn't been bickering,
411
00:16:47,962 --> 00:16:50,356
we wouldn't be
falling into a planet!
412
00:16:50,400 --> 00:16:51,966
Nobody's dying today
413
00:16:52,010 --> 00:16:54,330
because I'm gonna crawl through
the vents, unlock the door,
414
00:16:54,360 --> 00:16:55,468
and get the Moopsy
to chase me out,
415
00:16:55,492 --> 00:16:56,773
so you two can rush
in and stabilize
416
00:16:56,797 --> 00:16:58,625
the orbit while it
drinks my bones.
417
00:16:58,669 --> 00:17:00,323
- [grunts]
- Stand down, Mariner.
418
00:17:00,366 --> 00:17:01,498
Jack, we are plummeting.
419
00:17:01,541 --> 00:17:03,500
Even if this works,
we'll only stop re-entry
420
00:17:03,543 --> 00:17:05,241
by the skin of our teeth.
421
00:17:05,284 --> 00:17:07,765
Wait, that's it. Mariner,
422
00:17:07,808 --> 00:17:09,071
punch me in the face.
423
00:17:10,027 --> 00:17:11,420
That's an order, Lieutenant.
424
00:17:11,464 --> 00:17:12,987
Okay. [grunts]
425
00:17:13,031 --> 00:17:15,381
Come on, as hard as
you can. [grunts]
426
00:17:15,425 --> 00:17:17,340
[grunts]
427
00:17:17,382 --> 00:17:18,708
- That thing wants bones?
- [exclaiming]
428
00:17:18,732 --> 00:17:19,863
We'll give it bones.
429
00:17:19,907 --> 00:17:21,343
MARINER: Oh, you're a genius.
430
00:17:21,387 --> 00:17:23,389
- [grunting]
- [both laughing]
431
00:17:24,782 --> 00:17:28,219
I should have been
an outpost scientist.
432
00:17:28,264 --> 00:17:30,353
- [panting]
- Wait, Rutherford,
433
00:17:30,396 --> 00:17:31,939
you've been working
yourself to death all day.
434
00:17:31,963 --> 00:17:33,704
- You don't have to do this.
- No.
435
00:17:33,747 --> 00:17:35,358
This time I nailed it.
436
00:17:35,401 --> 00:17:37,205
I sped up the replicators
by nine whole femtoseconds.
437
00:17:37,229 --> 00:17:38,926
I'm definitely getting
a promotion now.
438
00:17:38,970 --> 00:17:41,494
You and I'll be the same rank
and stay friends forever.
439
00:17:41,538 --> 00:17:42,993
Billups. Whew. It
took an unbelievable
440
00:17:43,017 --> 00:17:44,845
amount of engineering,
but I finally
441
00:17:44,889 --> 00:17:46,780
managed...
- I'm sure whatever you did is great, Mr. Rutherford,
442
00:17:46,804 --> 00:17:49,372
- but it'll have to wait until after the pip ceremony.
- Huh?
443
00:17:49,415 --> 00:17:50,155
[cheering]
444
00:17:52,201 --> 00:17:53,898
Livik!
445
00:17:56,422 --> 00:17:58,424
I'm sorry, Tendi.
446
00:17:58,468 --> 00:18:00,731
I let you down.
447
00:18:00,774 --> 00:18:03,299
- Mr. Rutherford, stand at attention.
- What?
448
00:18:03,342 --> 00:18:05,779
I am your superior,
Ensign. Do it.
449
00:18:05,823 --> 00:18:07,694
We'll be friends no
matter what our ranks are.
450
00:18:07,738 --> 00:18:09,455
We're going to spend
tons of time hanging out
451
00:18:09,479 --> 00:18:11,674
and talking about science and
telling jokes and, you know,
452
00:18:11,698 --> 00:18:13,874
do all the things we used
to do. And that's an order.
453
00:18:13,918 --> 00:18:16,486
- Yes, ma'am.
- [both laugh]
454
00:18:16,529 --> 00:18:18,401
Oh, my gosh, I just
gave my first order.
455
00:18:18,444 --> 00:18:20,968
- Oh.
- Man, now I wish
456
00:18:21,012 --> 00:18:23,623
I hadn't turned down
all those promotions.
457
00:18:23,667 --> 00:18:24,668
Sorry, what?
458
00:18:24,711 --> 00:18:26,104
You know, for
saving the Cerritos
459
00:18:26,148 --> 00:18:27,279
from the Pakleds
460
00:18:27,323 --> 00:18:28,952
and the Rubidoux from
the space jellyfish,
461
00:18:28,976 --> 00:18:29,977
stuff like that.
462
00:18:30,021 --> 00:18:32,066
Wait, why did you
turn them all down?
463
00:18:32,110 --> 00:18:34,678
[sighs] Because I
didn't want my own room
464
00:18:34,721 --> 00:18:36,245
where I wouldn't be near you.
465
00:18:36,288 --> 00:18:39,857
Aw, Rutherford, but can't you
just go accept one right now?
466
00:18:39,900 --> 00:18:42,294
Nah, they took it really
seriously in engineering.
467
00:18:42,338 --> 00:18:44,446
- You have to earn it with a scientific...
- Hey, Billups!
468
00:18:44,470 --> 00:18:45,491
Can Rutherford
have his promotion
469
00:18:45,515 --> 00:18:47,299
for that time he
removed the hull?
470
00:18:47,343 --> 00:18:50,737
Oh, sure. Ah, sorry,
Livik, maybe next time.
471
00:18:52,783 --> 00:18:55,481
Wait, I can just ask
for stuff I deserve?
472
00:18:55,525 --> 00:18:58,702
-I guess.
-[chanting]: Rutherford! Rutherford!
473
00:18:58,745 --> 00:19:01,879
Hooray! [laughs, whoops]
Thanks, everyone.
474
00:19:03,010 --> 00:19:04,490
Rutherford.
475
00:19:04,534 --> 00:19:06,449
And also Tendi.
476
00:19:06,492 --> 00:19:08,190
[alarm blaring]
477
00:19:11,976 --> 00:19:13,456
Moopsy.
478
00:19:17,068 --> 00:19:18,548
[grunting]
479
00:19:23,161 --> 00:19:24,554
Moopsy.
480
00:19:24,597 --> 00:19:27,644
[grunts] Got you, you
cuddly little murderer.
481
00:19:27,687 --> 00:19:30,864
[laughs] We say-bih-eye
da say-sa orbih!
482
00:19:30,908 --> 00:19:32,518
[snorts] What's that, Gummy?
483
00:19:32,562 --> 00:19:34,303
We stabilized the
station's orbit.
484
00:19:34,346 --> 00:19:37,610
Oh, man, victory really
is that much sweeter
485
00:19:37,654 --> 00:19:39,308
when you almost got killed.
486
00:19:39,351 --> 00:19:40,676
I just wish we could
have figured out
487
00:19:40,700 --> 00:19:42,746
how this little guy got
out in the first place.
488
00:19:42,789 --> 00:19:45,028
I mean, it clearly wasn't Narj,
dude was brimming with bones.
489
00:19:45,052 --> 00:19:46,445
[lisping]: Let's
get these humans
490
00:19:46,489 --> 00:19:48,578
out of here. Starfleet
security can figure it out.
491
00:19:48,621 --> 00:19:50,841
Well, at least it
wasn't our fault.
492
00:19:50,884 --> 00:19:52,669
You know, humans are
always being blamed
493
00:19:52,712 --> 00:19:55,759
for being dangerous, but we
don't have claws or fangs
494
00:19:55,802 --> 00:19:57,064
- or...
- Hey, that umbrella
495
00:19:57,108 --> 00:19:58,675
is upside down, yeah?
496
00:20:03,897 --> 00:20:06,117
Did you [bleep] rewire
the Moopsy door?
497
00:20:06,160 --> 00:20:08,206
- You could've got us all killed.
- RANSOM: Wow.
498
00:20:08,250 --> 00:20:11,383
I guess humans really are
the most dangerous game.
499
00:20:11,427 --> 00:20:13,342
Damn it.
500
00:20:15,213 --> 00:20:17,171
MARINER: Lieutenant
junior grade's log..
501
00:20:17,215 --> 00:20:20,044
Nope, no, too weird.
Uh, let's go with
502
00:20:20,087 --> 00:20:22,960
Mariner's log. So,
yeah, of course
503
00:20:23,003 --> 00:20:24,353
it was the humans
in the menagerie
504
00:20:24,396 --> 00:20:26,006
that set the Moopsy free.
505
00:20:26,050 --> 00:20:28,115
They'd seen how profitable
they were as an attraction,
506
00:20:28,139 --> 00:20:31,229
so they wanted to kill Narj and
keep the station for themselve.
507
00:20:31,273 --> 00:20:33,536
Humans... we really
are the worst.
508
00:20:33,579 --> 00:20:34,928
- [laughs]
- MARINER: So, anyway,
509
00:20:34,972 --> 00:20:37,409
instead of bringing them to
theCerritos, we left them
510
00:20:37,453 --> 00:20:39,977
in the menagerie until somebody
else has time to pick them up.
511
00:20:40,020 --> 00:20:41,370
Could take a while.
512
00:20:41,413 --> 00:20:43,546
As for Ransom, it
took some doing,
513
00:20:43,589 --> 00:20:45,548
but Dr. T'Ana was
able to fix him up
514
00:20:45,591 --> 00:20:46,940
with a new set of chompers.
515
00:20:46,984 --> 00:20:48,657
Just don't eat any hard
stuff for a few days
516
00:20:48,681 --> 00:20:51,162
while the veneers set.
Now, if you'll excuse me,
517
00:20:51,205 --> 00:20:53,077
I have to go kill the
sheriff of Nottingham
518
00:20:53,120 --> 00:20:54,470
for being a little [bleep] face.
519
00:20:54,513 --> 00:20:55,732
[laughs]
520
00:20:55,775 --> 00:20:58,038
So, uh, sorry I knocked
all your teeth out.
521
00:20:58,082 --> 00:20:59,779
I ended up only needing,
like, ten of them.
522
00:20:59,823 --> 00:21:02,173
I was just happy you
were following my orders.
523
00:21:02,216 --> 00:21:04,218
I'm sorry I doubted you, sir.
524
00:21:04,262 --> 00:21:06,371
I haven't always been the most
supportive over the years,
525
00:21:06,395 --> 00:21:08,416
but at least now you know I'm
definitely not gonna let you
526
00:21:08,440 --> 00:21:09,963
self-sabotage anymore.
527
00:21:10,007 --> 00:21:12,401
So, maybe we can cool it
on the reign of terror.
528
00:21:12,444 --> 00:21:15,099
Yeah. Yeah. That'll
be, uh, interesting.
529
00:21:15,142 --> 00:21:16,187
Trust me, Mariner,
530
00:21:16,230 --> 00:21:18,189
you're gonna be a great officer.
531
00:21:18,232 --> 00:21:19,930
Just like me.
532
00:21:22,672 --> 00:21:24,258
- Congrats on the promotion, man.
- Thanks.
533
00:21:24,282 --> 00:21:25,849
And great call on
us being roommates.
534
00:21:25,892 --> 00:21:28,044
We're gonna get even better
quarters than if we were alone.
535
00:21:28,068 --> 00:21:30,593
Oh, really? No way.
536
00:21:30,636 --> 00:21:31,811
[chuckles] Aah!
537
00:21:31,855 --> 00:21:34,248
No! Oh, no, no, no, no, no,
this can't be happening.
538
00:21:34,292 --> 00:21:35,511
Whoa! That's bright.
539
00:21:35,554 --> 00:21:38,252
Just got to dim the view ports,
540
00:21:38,296 --> 00:21:40,211
and we're all set.
541
00:21:40,254 --> 00:21:41,865
[whimpers]
542
00:21:41,908 --> 00:21:44,258
Hope you don't mind me tinkering
on projects all night. Ow!
543
00:21:44,302 --> 00:21:47,174
[chuckles] If you see any
sparks, just stamp them out.
544
00:21:47,218 --> 00:21:48,393
[sighs]
545
00:21:48,437 --> 00:21:50,177
Ooh! Ah...
546
00:21:52,615 --> 00:21:53,964
Huh.
547
00:21:54,007 --> 00:21:55,313
You know what?
548
00:21:55,357 --> 00:21:57,968
This is already starting
to feel like home.
549
00:22:00,710 --> 00:22:03,408
Captioned by Media Access
Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org
550
00:22:58,855 --> 00:23:00,334
[man imitates weapons firing]
551
00:23:02,424 --> 00:23:04,295
Chirp.
552
00:23:05,305 --> 00:24:05,884
-== [ www.OpenSubtitles.com ] ==-
553
00:24:05,934 --> 00:24:10,484
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