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1
00:00:00,253 --> 00:00:04,420
(cash register bell ringing rhythmically)
2
00:00:05,721 --> 00:00:07,273
♫ Ground floor, perfumery
3
00:00:07,273 --> 00:00:08,648
♫ Stationery and leather goods
4
00:00:08,648 --> 00:00:10,073
♫ Wigs and haberdashery
5
00:00:10,073 --> 00:00:14,156
♫ Kitchenware and food, going up
6
00:00:17,262 --> 00:00:19,638
♫ Third floor, telephones,
gents' ready made suits
7
00:00:19,638 --> 00:00:21,063
- Good morning, ladies.
- Morning.
8
00:00:21,063 --> 00:00:22,602
- How are we this morning?
9
00:00:22,602 --> 00:00:24,685
- Me chamois' gone stiff.
10
00:00:26,612 --> 00:00:27,498
- It's so cold,
11
00:00:27,498 --> 00:00:29,566
I have to keep breaking
the ice in my bucket.
12
00:00:29,566 --> 00:00:30,936
What's happened to the heating?
13
00:00:30,936 --> 00:00:32,159
- It's been turned off.
14
00:00:32,159 --> 00:00:33,856
Haven't you heard, there's a fuel crisis.
15
00:00:33,856 --> 00:00:34,689
- Typical.
16
00:00:34,689 --> 00:00:37,347
They would choose the
coldest morning of the year.
17
00:00:37,347 --> 00:00:41,045
(audience laughing)
18
00:00:41,045 --> 00:00:44,337
- Well, it's a little
brisk this morning, ladies.
19
00:00:44,337 --> 00:00:45,831
What's happened to the heating in here?
20
00:00:45,831 --> 00:00:48,281
- It's been turned off, by order.
21
00:00:48,281 --> 00:00:50,457
- Whose silly idea was that?
22
00:00:50,457 --> 00:00:51,624
- It was mine.
23
00:00:53,168 --> 00:00:54,371
- But surely, sir,
24
00:00:54,371 --> 00:00:56,312
this is one of the days
that we're allowed heating?
25
00:00:56,312 --> 00:00:59,324
- Grace Brothers' fuel
stocks are practically nil.
26
00:00:59,324 --> 00:01:01,618
It was a boardroom-level discussion,
27
00:01:01,618 --> 00:01:04,003
and it was agreed to make
this further sacrifice
28
00:01:04,003 --> 00:01:05,571
in the interests of eking them out.
29
00:01:05,571 --> 00:01:07,222
I shall be making a general announcement
30
00:01:07,222 --> 00:01:10,476
as soon as the rest of the staff are here.
31
00:01:10,476 --> 00:01:13,476
(audience laughing)
32
00:01:17,819 --> 00:01:19,652
- Well, hello, cheeky.
33
00:01:20,622 --> 00:01:21,838
- Saucebox.
34
00:01:21,838 --> 00:01:23,895
- Oh, it's the Masked Stranger.
35
00:01:23,895 --> 00:01:27,819
Take my body, but leave my jewels alone.
36
00:01:27,819 --> 00:01:29,144
- Good morning, Mr. Humphries.
37
00:01:29,144 --> 00:01:31,501
- I withdraw the offer.
38
00:01:31,501 --> 00:01:33,454
- Very useful for keeping out the cold.
39
00:01:33,454 --> 00:01:36,554
- Whatever has happened to
the central heating in here?
40
00:01:36,554 --> 00:01:40,517
My ballpoint will never
function in this weather.
41
00:01:40,517 --> 00:01:43,956
- Oh, oh, feels like an igloo in here.
42
00:01:43,956 --> 00:01:47,011
- I think it's warmer outside.
43
00:01:47,011 --> 00:01:48,620
- Morning, Mrs. Slocombe, Miss Brahms.
44
00:01:48,620 --> 00:01:50,025
- Good morning, Captain Peacock.
45
00:01:50,025 --> 00:01:51,411
- One minute late.
46
00:01:51,411 --> 00:01:54,149
- You're lucky to have me
at all, Captain Peacock.
47
00:01:54,149 --> 00:01:56,635
I had to thaw me pussy out before I came.
48
00:01:56,635 --> 00:01:58,827
(audience laughing)
49
00:01:58,827 --> 00:02:00,827
It'd been out all night.
50
00:02:06,082 --> 00:02:08,499
- Good morning, Mr. Grainger.
51
00:02:10,191 --> 00:02:13,291
- Good morning, Mr. Grainger.
52
00:02:13,291 --> 00:02:17,208
Oh, he's the rudest man
I ever clapped eyes on.
53
00:02:18,045 --> 00:02:19,360
- Morning, Mr. Grainger.
54
00:02:19,360 --> 00:02:22,209
- Oh, good morning, Mr. Humphries.
55
00:02:22,209 --> 00:02:25,843
I'm so sorry that I'm
late, Captain Peacock,
56
00:02:25,843 --> 00:02:29,324
but my pipes were absolutely frozen solid.
57
00:02:29,324 --> 00:02:30,462
- Never mind, Mr. Grainger.
58
00:02:30,462 --> 00:02:34,194
A nice hot cup of tea will
soon get them working again.
59
00:02:34,194 --> 00:02:36,988
- Mr. Lucas not here, I see.
60
00:02:36,988 --> 00:02:38,571
- He's just coming.
61
00:02:42,057 --> 00:02:44,307
Oh, look, it's Sonja Henie.
62
00:02:47,374 --> 00:02:49,625
- I'm sorry I'm late, Captain Peacock.
63
00:02:49,625 --> 00:02:52,154
- Don't tell me you
skated here, Mr. Lucas?
64
00:02:52,154 --> 00:02:54,222
- No no, I went skating last
night with a girlfriend,
65
00:02:54,222 --> 00:02:55,848
and she's got thin blood.
66
00:02:55,848 --> 00:02:57,643
- What has that to do
with your being late?
67
00:02:57,643 --> 00:02:58,776
- I had to stay the night with her
68
00:02:58,776 --> 00:03:01,670
to keep her circulation going.
69
00:03:01,670 --> 00:03:03,478
It's a bit taters in here
this morning, isn't it?
70
00:03:03,478 --> 00:03:05,147
- You needn't concern
yourself with the heat,
71
00:03:05,147 --> 00:03:06,723
Mr. Lucas, Mr. Rumbold is going to
72
00:03:06,723 --> 00:03:08,692
make an announcement about
that in a few moments.
73
00:03:08,692 --> 00:03:10,841
- Oh well, we've got nothing
to worry about then, have we?
74
00:03:10,841 --> 00:03:12,398
The sheer excitement of an announcement
75
00:03:12,398 --> 00:03:13,887
by Mr. Rumbold is sending the blood
76
00:03:13,887 --> 00:03:15,873
pounding through my temples already.
77
00:03:15,873 --> 00:03:18,398
- That's not excitement,
that's a hangover.
78
00:03:18,398 --> 00:03:19,577
- Is everyone here?
79
00:03:19,577 --> 00:03:20,784
- Finally, yes.
80
00:03:20,784 --> 00:03:24,784
Gather round, Mr. Rumbold
wishes to address you.
81
00:03:26,069 --> 00:03:29,478
Departmental staff only, not cleaners.
82
00:03:29,478 --> 00:03:31,444
- Oh, buckets.
83
00:03:31,444 --> 00:03:34,444
(audience laughing)
84
00:03:36,231 --> 00:03:39,097
- Mr. Grainger, will you join us?
85
00:03:39,097 --> 00:03:42,445
- Oh, yes, it is very parky, isn't it?
86
00:03:42,445 --> 00:03:46,641
Yes, I had to put my long
underpants on this morning.
87
00:03:46,641 --> 00:03:47,558
- Allow me.
88
00:03:49,578 --> 00:03:51,998
He's ready to receive.
89
00:03:51,998 --> 00:03:53,921
- Would you mind joining us, Mr. Grainger?
90
00:03:53,921 --> 00:03:55,464
- Oh yes, yes. I'm sorry.
91
00:03:55,464 --> 00:03:57,713
But I have to keep this wool in my ears.
92
00:03:57,713 --> 00:04:00,130
Otherwise, the wax goes hard.
93
00:04:01,149 --> 00:04:03,778
- We must keep the wax
flowing, mustn't we?
94
00:04:03,778 --> 00:04:05,499
- Perhaps you could just keep it out
95
00:04:05,499 --> 00:04:07,655
while I make my announcement?
96
00:04:07,655 --> 00:04:10,720
As you know, the natural
fuel resources of the world
97
00:04:10,720 --> 00:04:12,005
are in jeopardy.
98
00:04:12,005 --> 00:04:15,012
- That's about 10 miles north of Mecca.
99
00:04:15,012 --> 00:04:18,665
- I used to go dancing there, you know.
100
00:04:18,665 --> 00:04:20,234
- Listen to this, listen, now.
101
00:04:20,234 --> 00:04:22,591
It took 70 million years
for nature to build
102
00:04:22,591 --> 00:04:24,794
these resources of coal and oil.
103
00:04:24,794 --> 00:04:28,867
In the space of 70 short
years, man has ravished them.
104
00:04:28,867 --> 00:04:30,700
- It's typical of men.
105
00:04:31,939 --> 00:04:34,223
- The fact is, we cannot get enough.
106
00:04:34,223 --> 00:04:35,473
- True.
- True.
107
00:04:37,732 --> 00:04:40,814
- Stocks of world oil have
never been at such a low ebb,
108
00:04:40,814 --> 00:04:43,153
the situation never more desperate.
109
00:04:43,153 --> 00:04:46,326
- We should never have pulled out of Suez.
110
00:04:46,326 --> 00:04:48,459
- Uh, quite, now, where was I?
111
00:04:48,459 --> 00:04:49,366
- Desperate.
112
00:04:49,366 --> 00:04:50,901
- Ah, oh, yes.
113
00:04:50,901 --> 00:04:54,372
World oil has never
been at such a low ebb.
114
00:04:54,372 --> 00:04:57,491
And neither has Grace
Brothers' coke source.
115
00:04:57,491 --> 00:04:59,160
We shall all have to do what we can
116
00:04:59,160 --> 00:05:00,629
to combat this critical crisis.
117
00:05:00,629 --> 00:05:03,911
- Does that mean we've
got to go down the mines?
118
00:05:03,911 --> 00:05:04,963
- Mr. Humphries.
119
00:05:04,963 --> 00:05:05,796
- Present.
120
00:05:07,211 --> 00:05:10,494
- It has been decided at boardroom level
121
00:05:10,494 --> 00:05:12,528
that the central heating of Grace Brothers
122
00:05:12,528 --> 00:05:15,546
will be turned off for one
additional day per week,
123
00:05:15,546 --> 00:05:16,995
starting with today.
124
00:05:16,995 --> 00:05:19,886
- Couldn't we wait until the summer?
125
00:05:19,886 --> 00:05:21,664
- I know that you're all behind me
126
00:05:21,664 --> 00:05:23,446
to help pull this country through.
127
00:05:23,446 --> 00:05:24,846
These are dark days,
128
00:05:24,846 --> 00:05:28,144
but I feel sure the end of
the tunnel cannot be far away.
129
00:05:28,144 --> 00:05:30,606
Before long, I'm certain
we shall burst forth
130
00:05:30,606 --> 00:05:32,046
into the light again.
131
00:05:32,046 --> 00:05:33,726
- Oh, when I hear words like that,
132
00:05:33,726 --> 00:05:36,285
it makes me proud to be British.
133
00:05:36,285 --> 00:05:38,155
- Thank you, Mrs. Slocombe.
134
00:05:38,155 --> 00:05:40,206
- But can't we just have
a little electric fire
135
00:05:40,206 --> 00:05:42,064
behind the counter?
136
00:05:42,064 --> 00:05:43,144
- No, certainly not.
137
00:05:43,144 --> 00:05:45,595
Electric heaters are absolutely forbidden.
138
00:05:45,595 --> 00:05:47,126
- Well, can we keep our coats on, then?
139
00:05:47,126 --> 00:05:50,042
- No no, no no no, really, and
you must remember, after all,
140
00:05:50,042 --> 00:05:51,911
it's the same for all of us.
141
00:05:51,911 --> 00:05:54,631
So, carry on, and good luck.
142
00:05:54,631 --> 00:05:58,626
- Now I wish I'd put on
thicker knickers this morning.
143
00:05:58,626 --> 00:06:01,660
- You young girls today
don't wear enough clothes.
144
00:06:01,660 --> 00:06:03,743
- And how would you know?
145
00:06:05,100 --> 00:06:07,706
- I keep warm with this, see?
146
00:06:07,706 --> 00:06:10,434
The commandos used to
wear them during the war.
147
00:06:10,434 --> 00:06:11,822
You'd do well to do the same.
148
00:06:11,822 --> 00:06:13,122
- What, string knickers?
149
00:06:13,122 --> 00:06:14,990
(audience laughter drowns out speaker)
150
00:06:14,990 --> 00:06:16,296
- Well, I think it's ridiculous,
151
00:06:16,296 --> 00:06:19,741
expecting us to fit a customer
with a bra in this weather.
152
00:06:19,741 --> 00:06:21,741
- Now, remember, as Mr. Rumbold says,
153
00:06:21,741 --> 00:06:24,083
it's the same for all of us.
154
00:06:24,083 --> 00:06:25,666
- Yellow and green.
155
00:06:26,939 --> 00:06:28,439
Must be the Earth.
156
00:06:29,522 --> 00:06:31,772
Oh that's it, switches off.
157
00:06:36,138 --> 00:06:38,471
All right, then, here we go.
158
00:06:39,429 --> 00:06:40,262
- Pssht!
159
00:06:40,262 --> 00:06:43,235
(audience laughing)
160
00:06:43,235 --> 00:06:44,902
Coffee, Mr. Rumbold?
161
00:06:46,360 --> 00:06:48,738
Having trouble with your
electric fire, are you?
162
00:06:48,738 --> 00:06:50,238
- Fire, what fire?
163
00:06:51,818 --> 00:06:53,218
- That fire.
164
00:06:53,218 --> 00:06:55,200
- Oh yes, that fire.
165
00:06:55,200 --> 00:06:56,558
I've just taken the plug off
166
00:06:56,558 --> 00:07:00,558
to make sure that no one
can use it by accident.
167
00:07:01,550 --> 00:07:03,230
- Never mind, Mr. Rumbold.
168
00:07:03,230 --> 00:07:05,150
I won't mention the special privileges
169
00:07:05,150 --> 00:07:07,670
of the managerial classes
while the poor old workers
170
00:07:07,670 --> 00:07:10,920
are out there freezing their knees off.
171
00:07:12,148 --> 00:07:12,981
Now, then.
172
00:07:13,851 --> 00:07:17,710
How would you like to invest
in a bottle of scotch, hey?
173
00:07:17,710 --> 00:07:19,181
Fell off the back of a lorry.
174
00:07:19,181 --> 00:07:20,514
- Certainly not.
175
00:07:22,163 --> 00:07:23,897
- Oh, all right, then.
176
00:07:23,897 --> 00:07:27,199
I'll just have to tell them out
there that you don't need it
177
00:07:27,199 --> 00:07:30,489
'cause you've got your
fire to keep you warm.
178
00:07:30,489 --> 00:07:31,556
- Mr. Mash.
179
00:07:31,556 --> 00:07:33,137
- Yes?
180
00:07:33,137 --> 00:07:34,396
- How much?
181
00:07:34,396 --> 00:07:37,063
- I think you'll find these
imitation rabbitskin gloves
182
00:07:37,063 --> 00:07:39,775
to your liking, sir, we've
had quite a run on them.
183
00:07:39,775 --> 00:07:41,024
- Imitation rabbit?
184
00:07:41,024 --> 00:07:42,552
- Yes, they're just like the real thing,
185
00:07:42,552 --> 00:07:44,135
aren't they, Mr. Lucas?
186
00:07:44,135 --> 00:07:47,001
- We daren't put two pairs in
the same drawer together, sir.
187
00:07:47,001 --> 00:07:50,001
(audience laughing)
188
00:07:50,913 --> 00:07:52,625
- Thank you, Mr. Lucas.
189
00:07:52,625 --> 00:07:54,385
- I suppose I'd better take them then.
190
00:07:54,385 --> 00:07:56,575
- Certainly, sir.
191
00:07:56,575 --> 00:07:59,325
- Captain Peacock, are you free?
192
00:08:01,015 --> 00:08:02,735
- At the moment, yes.
193
00:08:02,735 --> 00:08:03,945
- Could I have a word with you?
194
00:08:03,945 --> 00:08:05,095
- Yes, certainly.
195
00:08:05,095 --> 00:08:07,512
- Well, it's rather personal.
196
00:08:12,063 --> 00:08:16,313
Miss Brahms has just been
and it's frozen over.
197
00:08:16,313 --> 00:08:19,313
(audience laughing)
198
00:08:20,343 --> 00:08:22,535
- I beg your pardon?
199
00:08:22,535 --> 00:08:24,702
- The ladies', it's solid.
200
00:08:25,945 --> 00:08:29,953
- I see, but what exactly do
you expect me to do about it?
201
00:08:29,953 --> 00:08:34,120
- Well I, I thought I'd ask
you if we could use the gents'.
202
00:08:36,993 --> 00:08:38,511
It's rather urgent.
203
00:08:38,511 --> 00:08:41,844
- Yes, well, I'll, I'll have
a word with Mr. Grainger.
204
00:08:41,844 --> 00:08:43,995
You must go through the
right channels, you know.
205
00:08:43,995 --> 00:08:46,162
- Well, don't be too long.
206
00:08:49,243 --> 00:08:51,007
- Are you free, Mr. Grainger?
207
00:08:51,007 --> 00:08:52,340
- Yes, I'm free.
208
00:08:54,047 --> 00:08:56,825
- A slightly delicate
situation has arisen.
209
00:08:56,825 --> 00:08:57,908
It appears...
210
00:09:06,167 --> 00:09:07,495
- He's asking Grainger.
211
00:09:07,495 --> 00:09:11,162
- Oh, fancy telling
Grainger I wanted to go.
212
00:09:12,345 --> 00:09:14,916
- Yes, I understand, Captain Peacock.
213
00:09:14,916 --> 00:09:19,614
Of course, I shall have
to consult my colleagues.
214
00:09:19,614 --> 00:09:22,864
Mr. Humphries, Mr. Lucas, are you free?
215
00:09:25,065 --> 00:09:27,663
- We're free.
- We're free.
216
00:09:27,663 --> 00:09:31,615
- Oh, we'll be sending for
Dr. Kissinger in a minute.
217
00:09:31,615 --> 00:09:35,282
- It's degrading, he's
telling them all now.
218
00:09:37,854 --> 00:09:41,356
- Why can't she use the one
in the Bargain Basement?
219
00:09:41,356 --> 00:09:43,585
- Yes, or the public
one on the Sports floor?
220
00:09:43,585 --> 00:09:46,713
- No, no, no, you know those
are out of bounds to staff.
221
00:09:46,713 --> 00:09:48,031
- I think, Captain Peacock,
222
00:09:48,031 --> 00:09:51,223
in view of the apparent
urgency of the emergency,
223
00:09:51,223 --> 00:09:52,913
that we could allow the ladies
224
00:09:52,913 --> 00:09:56,644
to have access to our facilities, agreed?
225
00:09:56,644 --> 00:09:58,404
- I agree, Mr. Grainger.
- Mr. Lucas?
226
00:09:58,404 --> 00:10:02,244
- Yes, and may I say, what
a triumph for democracy.
227
00:10:02,244 --> 00:10:04,895
- Then I will convey
your unanimous decision
228
00:10:04,895 --> 00:10:06,812
to the party concerned.
229
00:10:09,904 --> 00:10:10,815
- Well?
230
00:10:10,815 --> 00:10:11,825
- They've agreed.
231
00:10:11,825 --> 00:10:13,905
- There you are, Miss Brahms.
232
00:10:13,905 --> 00:10:15,988
- I don't want to go now.
233
00:10:26,234 --> 00:10:29,234
(audience laughing)
234
00:10:41,270 --> 00:10:44,305
- Mr. Humphries, what are you doing?
235
00:10:44,305 --> 00:10:47,555
- I'm warming me hands in the cashmere.
236
00:10:49,240 --> 00:10:50,810
It was so cold last night,
237
00:10:50,810 --> 00:10:54,462
I had to iron the sheets
before I got into bed.
238
00:10:54,462 --> 00:10:57,554
- I'll tell you these power
cuts make me wish I was married.
239
00:10:57,554 --> 00:10:58,387
- Psst!
240
00:10:58,387 --> 00:10:59,345
- What?
- What?
241
00:10:59,345 --> 00:11:00,928
- Psst, here, lads.
242
00:11:01,806 --> 00:11:04,577
What about a cup of
under-the-counter cocoa?
243
00:11:04,577 --> 00:11:05,410
- Oh, yeah.
244
00:11:05,410 --> 00:11:06,635
- Don't let Peacock see.
245
00:11:06,635 --> 00:11:08,795
- If he complains, he won't get one.
246
00:11:08,795 --> 00:11:10,184
- He's one of us.
247
00:11:10,184 --> 00:11:11,304
- 10 pence each.
248
00:11:11,304 --> 00:11:13,054
- He's not one of us.
249
00:11:14,885 --> 00:11:16,693
- You want to get a fire like old Rumbold?
250
00:11:16,693 --> 00:11:18,603
He ain't one of you either.
251
00:11:18,603 --> 00:11:21,270
- A fire, Rumbold's got a fire?
252
00:11:22,612 --> 00:11:23,473
That does it.
253
00:11:23,473 --> 00:11:24,602
- What are you going to do?
254
00:11:24,602 --> 00:11:25,849
- Cover for me.
255
00:11:25,849 --> 00:11:27,803
- You're wanted in the
fitting room, Mr. Lucas.
256
00:11:27,803 --> 00:11:31,970
- I'm just going to the
fitting room, Mr. Humphries.
257
00:11:36,002 --> 00:11:38,601
- Mash, what are you doing?
258
00:11:38,601 --> 00:11:40,745
- Little comfort for the troops, sir.
259
00:11:40,745 --> 00:11:45,184
- You're not allowed on
this floor after 9:30.
260
00:11:45,184 --> 00:11:48,585
- Nice hot cup of cocoa, Captain?
261
00:11:48,585 --> 00:11:50,835
- Leave the floor.
262
00:11:50,835 --> 00:11:52,635
- I'll leave one round the back for you.
263
00:11:52,635 --> 00:11:53,654
- I didn't hear that.
264
00:11:53,654 --> 00:11:56,212
- I said I'd leave one
round the back for you!
265
00:11:56,212 --> 00:11:59,212
(audience laughing)
266
00:12:00,234 --> 00:12:03,254
- May I congratulate you ladies on the way
267
00:12:03,254 --> 00:12:05,435
you're bearing up under
these arctic conditions?
268
00:12:05,435 --> 00:12:07,275
- Thank you, Captain Peacock.
269
00:12:07,275 --> 00:12:08,924
- I hope you're not too cold, Miss Brahms.
270
00:12:08,924 --> 00:12:11,355
- No, I borrowed a pair of earmuffs.
271
00:12:11,355 --> 00:12:13,012
- I trust you're not,
272
00:12:13,012 --> 00:12:14,305
I trust you're not contemplating
273
00:12:14,305 --> 00:12:16,115
wearing them in the department?
274
00:12:16,115 --> 00:12:17,365
- I already am.
275
00:12:20,355 --> 00:12:22,555
- Mrs. Slocombe, do you allow that?
276
00:12:22,555 --> 00:12:25,254
- I really don't see how I can complain,
277
00:12:25,254 --> 00:12:27,754
considering I'm wearing these.
278
00:12:30,515 --> 00:12:32,265
- What on earth are those?
279
00:12:32,265 --> 00:12:35,161
- A pair of Mr. Grainger's long johns.
280
00:12:35,161 --> 00:12:36,362
- Mr. Grainger's?
281
00:12:36,362 --> 00:12:38,195
- They're from Mr. Grainger's department.
282
00:12:38,195 --> 00:12:39,865
Apparently, they shrank in the wash
283
00:12:39,865 --> 00:12:43,437
and were returned as a complaint.
284
00:12:43,437 --> 00:12:45,097
- I'm not surprised.
285
00:12:45,097 --> 00:12:47,825
I'm afraid I shall have
to ask you to remove them.
286
00:12:47,825 --> 00:12:49,325
- Captain Peacock.
287
00:12:50,681 --> 00:12:53,848
Wild horses wouldn't drag them off me.
288
00:12:55,315 --> 00:12:57,963
- A pretty picture, indeed.
289
00:12:57,963 --> 00:12:59,402
But staff regulations require
290
00:12:59,402 --> 00:13:01,403
that you wear stockings or tights.
291
00:13:01,403 --> 00:13:04,305
- Ah, but it doesn't say I
can't wear anything over them.
292
00:13:04,305 --> 00:13:05,785
Anyway, nobody can see me
293
00:13:05,785 --> 00:13:07,128
when I'm behind the counter.
294
00:13:07,128 --> 00:13:08,745
- I'm afraid I must insist.
295
00:13:08,745 --> 00:13:11,283
- I see, then I shall
have to go over your head.
296
00:13:11,283 --> 00:13:13,243
- You won't find it easy in those.
297
00:13:13,243 --> 00:13:16,243
(audience laughing)
298
00:13:21,803 --> 00:13:22,754
- Mrs. Slocombe.
299
00:13:22,754 --> 00:13:24,363
- Yes, Mr. Humphries?
300
00:13:24,363 --> 00:13:27,323
- It's engaged at the moment.
301
00:13:27,323 --> 00:13:31,155
Mr. Grainger's adjusting his thermal pad.
302
00:13:31,155 --> 00:13:32,990
- I wasn't going there.
303
00:13:32,990 --> 00:13:34,323
- Sorry I spoke.
304
00:13:37,975 --> 00:13:39,271
(knocking)
305
00:13:39,271 --> 00:13:40,688
- Just a moment!
306
00:13:42,671 --> 00:13:43,504
Enter.
307
00:13:44,862 --> 00:13:48,193
- Mr. Rumbold, I'm so
sorry to disturb you,
308
00:13:48,193 --> 00:13:51,402
but Captain Peacock
asked me to remove these,
309
00:13:51,402 --> 00:13:53,235
so I said I'd ask you.
310
00:13:54,411 --> 00:13:59,197
- Well, you appear to have
got them halfway down already.
311
00:13:59,197 --> 00:14:02,233
Where exactly are they stuck?
312
00:14:02,233 --> 00:14:03,902
- They're not stuck.
313
00:14:03,902 --> 00:14:07,569
I just want to know how
you feel about them.
314
00:14:09,550 --> 00:14:14,190
- To be perfectly frank, they
don't do anything for me.
315
00:14:14,190 --> 00:14:16,821
- They're not supposed
to do anything for you.
316
00:14:16,821 --> 00:14:19,073
They're supposed to be keeping me warm.
317
00:14:19,073 --> 00:14:20,774
- I see, and are they?
318
00:14:20,774 --> 00:14:21,607
- Yes.
319
00:14:23,054 --> 00:14:25,113
- Then what's the problem?
320
00:14:25,113 --> 00:14:28,446
- Do you mind if I don't take them off?
321
00:14:29,873 --> 00:14:31,873
- I would prefer it.
322
00:14:31,873 --> 00:14:32,873
- Thank you.
323
00:14:34,534 --> 00:14:37,367
- Always glad to be of assistance.
324
00:14:42,593 --> 00:14:45,093
I wonder what the problem was?
325
00:14:48,760 --> 00:14:49,931
- Hold the fort, will you?
326
00:14:49,931 --> 00:14:54,098
I just want to go and get a
plug for this electric blanket.
327
00:14:55,060 --> 00:14:56,689
- Have a nice coffee break, Mr. Grainger?
328
00:14:56,689 --> 00:15:00,856
- Yes, but it's just as cold
in the canteen, you know.
329
00:15:02,761 --> 00:15:06,223
I don't think my thermal
pad is working at all.
330
00:15:06,223 --> 00:15:09,056
- Here, let me warm it up for you.
331
00:15:10,711 --> 00:15:12,111
- Where did you get?
332
00:15:12,111 --> 00:15:14,140
- It makes a lovely handwarmer.
333
00:15:14,140 --> 00:15:15,500
- Where did you get it?
334
00:15:15,500 --> 00:15:18,111
- Mr. Lucas did a foray to
the electrical department.
335
00:15:18,111 --> 00:15:20,049
He's done us proud.
336
00:15:20,049 --> 00:15:20,882
May I?
337
00:15:24,564 --> 00:15:26,981
Don't be silly, it's only me.
338
00:15:33,527 --> 00:15:36,385
Now, then, you'd better
take my hot-water bottle
339
00:15:36,385 --> 00:15:37,936
just for the time being.
340
00:15:37,936 --> 00:15:41,727
It'll take the chill off your kidneys.
341
00:15:41,727 --> 00:15:43,810
- That's neat, thank you.
342
00:15:45,310 --> 00:15:47,477
(humming)
343
00:15:52,314 --> 00:15:55,314
(audience laughing)
344
00:16:04,167 --> 00:16:06,417
- You shall go to the ball.
345
00:16:12,821 --> 00:16:15,174
- Are you free, Mr. Humphries?
346
00:16:15,174 --> 00:16:16,895
- Free, Captain Peacock.
347
00:16:16,895 --> 00:16:21,484
- [Captain] Good, we mustn't
keep a customer waiting.
348
00:16:21,484 --> 00:16:22,317
- The iron.
349
00:16:22,317 --> 00:16:23,746
- It's all right, I've fixed
the electric blanket now.
350
00:16:23,746 --> 00:16:24,876
- No, but listen, you don't seem.
351
00:16:24,876 --> 00:16:26,978
- [Captain] Mr. Humphries.
352
00:16:26,978 --> 00:16:29,362
- I think you're very wise, madam,
353
00:16:29,362 --> 00:16:31,906
to buy two pairs of the wooly ones.
354
00:16:31,906 --> 00:16:35,543
It can get very chilly up the Cairngorms.
355
00:16:35,543 --> 00:16:39,710
- It can, indeed, thank
you so much for your help.
356
00:16:40,703 --> 00:16:42,642
- You've had a long
coffee break, haven't you?
357
00:16:42,642 --> 00:16:44,890
- I didn't have a coffee break,
I was too busy queuing up
358
00:16:44,890 --> 00:16:46,947
in Wines and Spirits for your Wild Duck.
359
00:16:46,947 --> 00:16:48,619
- Keep your voice down.
360
00:16:48,619 --> 00:16:50,008
- They didn't have any half bottles.
361
00:16:50,008 --> 00:16:52,136
I had to get a whole one,
it's on your account.
362
00:16:52,136 --> 00:16:53,757
- A whole bottle?
363
00:16:53,757 --> 00:16:55,604
How can I take a discreet nip
364
00:16:55,604 --> 00:16:58,244
out of a whole bottle of brandy?
365
00:16:58,244 --> 00:17:00,015
I meant a miniature.
366
00:17:00,015 --> 00:17:02,983
- Can you put a drop of it in something?
367
00:17:02,983 --> 00:17:05,855
- Yes, pass me one of those
dummy perfume bottles.
368
00:17:05,855 --> 00:17:09,086
No, no, that one at the
top with the spray on.
369
00:17:09,086 --> 00:17:10,503
Now put it there.
370
00:17:14,116 --> 00:17:17,074
- Mrs. Slocombe, it's
free if you want to go.
371
00:17:17,074 --> 00:17:20,074
(audience laughing)
372
00:17:28,615 --> 00:17:30,948
(whistling)
373
00:17:34,916 --> 00:17:37,085
- That's lovely.
(buzzing)
374
00:17:37,085 --> 00:17:39,252
(popping)
375
00:17:48,489 --> 00:17:49,985
- Are you being served, sir?
376
00:17:49,985 --> 00:17:51,689
- I'd like to look at
some trousers, please.
377
00:17:51,689 --> 00:17:53,566
- One moment, sir.
- Thank you.
378
00:17:53,566 --> 00:17:55,041
- Mr. Humphries, where's Mr. Lucas?
379
00:17:55,041 --> 00:17:59,208
- Excuse me, sir, he's round
the bend, Captain Peacock.
380
00:18:00,622 --> 00:18:03,084
- The circulation's coming back again.
381
00:18:03,084 --> 00:18:04,872
- Mr. Lucas, wake up, you have a customer.
382
00:18:04,872 --> 00:18:06,452
- Have I, where?
383
00:18:06,452 --> 00:18:08,102
- Over here, hurry.
384
00:18:08,102 --> 00:18:08,935
- Ah, yes.
385
00:18:10,297 --> 00:18:12,380
Can't he come over here?
386
00:18:13,364 --> 00:18:16,414
- He wants a pair of
trousers, not shirts and ties.
387
00:18:16,414 --> 00:18:18,822
- Right, yes, hang on.
388
00:18:18,822 --> 00:18:22,902
Where's my shoes, what'd
I do with my shoes?
389
00:18:22,902 --> 00:18:24,253
- Come on, come on, we'll lose him.
390
00:18:24,253 --> 00:18:26,732
- I'm just coming, Captain Peacock.
391
00:18:26,732 --> 00:18:28,254
- He won't be a moment, sir.
392
00:18:28,254 --> 00:18:30,385
It's a very busy day, you know.
393
00:18:30,385 --> 00:18:32,135
Lucas, your customer.
394
00:18:33,355 --> 00:18:36,166
- Ah, there you are, yes.
395
00:18:36,166 --> 00:18:37,833
Can I help you, sir?
396
00:18:39,054 --> 00:18:41,054
- Yes, please, I'd, ahem.
397
00:18:41,054 --> 00:18:44,012
I'd like a pair of trousers!
398
00:18:44,012 --> 00:18:45,814
- Bring your tape over here, Lucas.
399
00:18:45,814 --> 00:18:47,481
- My tape, yes, yes.
400
00:18:48,676 --> 00:18:50,556
I suppose, I suppose the
gentleman couldn't come
401
00:18:50,556 --> 00:18:51,834
and stick his leg up on the counter
402
00:18:51,834 --> 00:18:54,167
and I could do it from here?
403
00:18:55,846 --> 00:18:57,139
No, I suppose I couldn't.
404
00:18:57,139 --> 00:18:57,972
(buzzing)
405
00:18:57,972 --> 00:19:00,140
(popping)
406
00:19:00,140 --> 00:19:04,217
- Don't worry, sir, he'll
be with you any minute.
407
00:19:04,217 --> 00:19:05,050
Lucas!
408
00:19:05,050 --> 00:19:08,217
- I just dropped my tape measure, sir.
409
00:19:14,092 --> 00:19:17,087
I'll just take your inside leg, sir.
410
00:19:17,087 --> 00:19:20,754
- Mr. Lucas, what have
you got on your feet?
411
00:19:21,631 --> 00:19:22,781
- On my feet, Captain Peacock?
412
00:19:22,781 --> 00:19:24,783
- Yes, Mr. Lucas.
413
00:19:24,783 --> 00:19:28,700
- Ah, yes, well, it's a
new line, you see, sir.
414
00:19:29,652 --> 00:19:33,071
Continental novelty footwarmers.
415
00:19:33,071 --> 00:19:34,261
- They look like gloves.
416
00:19:34,261 --> 00:19:35,841
- Quite right, yes.
417
00:19:35,841 --> 00:19:37,961
They're dual-purpose, you see.
418
00:19:37,961 --> 00:19:39,120
They were designed especially
419
00:19:39,120 --> 00:19:41,120
because of the crisis in the Middle East.
420
00:19:41,120 --> 00:19:43,183
- I don't quite see what
gloves have got to do
421
00:19:43,183 --> 00:19:44,921
with the Middle East.
422
00:19:44,921 --> 00:19:45,754
- Yes.
423
00:19:48,441 --> 00:19:51,531
Well, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's.
424
00:19:51,531 --> 00:19:54,780
It's quite, it's quite,
it's quite simple, really.
425
00:19:54,780 --> 00:19:56,183
You see, because of the oil shortage,
426
00:19:56,183 --> 00:19:58,644
we're using more coal to make electricity,
427
00:19:58,644 --> 00:20:01,004
and we need the electricity
to boil our electric kettles
428
00:20:01,004 --> 00:20:03,012
to make the hot water
for our hot-water bottles
429
00:20:03,012 --> 00:20:04,845
to keep our feet warm.
430
00:20:07,084 --> 00:20:08,724
If you wear these novelty footwarmers,
431
00:20:08,724 --> 00:20:11,505
you don't need a hot-water
bottle to keep your feet warm,
432
00:20:11,505 --> 00:20:14,082
thereby saving electricity
and saving the fuel
433
00:20:14,082 --> 00:20:17,764
that our country so desperately needs.
434
00:20:17,764 --> 00:20:21,931
- Well, if it's going to help
the economy, I'll take a pair.
435
00:20:24,796 --> 00:20:26,296
Make it two pairs.
436
00:20:28,964 --> 00:20:30,724
- Well done, Mr. Lucas.
437
00:20:30,724 --> 00:20:33,891
- Oh, it was nothing, Captain Peacock.
438
00:20:35,364 --> 00:20:37,115
- Try this one, madam.
439
00:20:37,115 --> 00:20:39,653
It has a feeling of spring about it.
440
00:20:39,653 --> 00:20:42,153
- It has, rather, I'll try it.
441
00:20:47,486 --> 00:20:50,486
(audience laughing)
442
00:20:52,954 --> 00:20:54,871
By jove, I needed that.
443
00:20:57,182 --> 00:20:58,983
- Excuse me.
444
00:20:58,983 --> 00:21:02,373
You don't think this hides
too much of my face, do you?
445
00:21:02,373 --> 00:21:04,482
- Definitely not.
446
00:21:04,482 --> 00:21:05,680
- I'm not too sure.
447
00:21:05,680 --> 00:21:07,353
Perhaps you could show me some others?
448
00:21:07,353 --> 00:21:09,770
- Certainly, madam, this way.
449
00:21:21,207 --> 00:21:22,707
- Oh, most exotic.
450
00:21:27,144 --> 00:21:28,311
That's better.
451
00:21:29,802 --> 00:21:31,522
- There we are, sir, one pair of trousers
452
00:21:31,522 --> 00:21:33,371
and two pairs of warmers.
453
00:21:33,371 --> 00:21:34,384
If your wife's don't fit,
454
00:21:34,384 --> 00:21:36,133
we can always give you another size.
455
00:21:36,133 --> 00:21:38,383
Warmers, that is, not wife.
456
00:21:39,224 --> 00:21:40,057
- Oh, yes.
457
00:21:40,904 --> 00:21:43,053
Thank you very much.
458
00:21:43,053 --> 00:21:43,886
- Idiot.
459
00:21:46,171 --> 00:21:48,501
- We've sold right out
of wooly comforters.
460
00:21:48,501 --> 00:21:49,821
What did you do with the iron?
461
00:21:49,821 --> 00:21:50,779
- I haven't used the iron.
462
00:21:50,779 --> 00:21:52,277
I've been using my electric blanket.
463
00:21:52,277 --> 00:21:54,461
- Oh, no, Mr. Grainger's thermal pad.
464
00:21:54,461 --> 00:21:55,449
- What about it?
465
00:21:55,449 --> 00:21:56,421
- It's under the iron.
466
00:21:56,421 --> 00:21:57,254
- Where's the iron?
467
00:21:57,254 --> 00:21:58,586
- Under the hat.
- Where's the hat?
468
00:21:58,586 --> 00:22:00,169
- On the counter.
469
00:22:00,169 --> 00:22:03,169
(audience laughing)
470
00:22:07,706 --> 00:22:10,206
- Are you free, Mr. Grainger?
471
00:22:11,346 --> 00:22:13,966
- Yes, I'm free, Captain Peacock.
472
00:22:13,966 --> 00:22:16,477
- How long have we been
displaying electrical equipment
473
00:22:16,477 --> 00:22:19,060
in the Cardinal Wolsey cabinet?
474
00:22:30,088 --> 00:22:32,588
- Are you free, Mr. Humphries?
475
00:22:34,578 --> 00:22:37,218
- I'm afraid I am, Mr. Grainger.
476
00:22:37,218 --> 00:22:39,135
Mr. Lucas is free, too.
477
00:22:40,418 --> 00:22:41,418
- Thank you.
478
00:22:42,928 --> 00:22:45,966
- Mr. Lucas, I'm sure
that you, of all people,
479
00:22:45,966 --> 00:22:49,968
can tell us how an iron came
to be in the sock cabinet.
480
00:22:49,968 --> 00:22:50,885
- An iron?
481
00:22:56,377 --> 00:22:59,506
Well, perhaps it's a new sales
gimmick, Captain Peacock.
482
00:22:59,506 --> 00:23:02,768
- Yes, keep your toes as warm as toast.
483
00:23:02,768 --> 00:23:04,351
- And what is that?
484
00:23:05,833 --> 00:23:08,424
- It's my thermal pad (crying).
485
00:23:08,424 --> 00:23:11,257
- Glass of water for Mr. Grainger.
486
00:23:13,470 --> 00:23:16,344
(knocking)
487
00:23:16,344 --> 00:23:17,424
- Mr. Rumbold,
488
00:23:17,424 --> 00:23:19,794
something of a very
serious nature has arisen.
489
00:23:19,794 --> 00:23:21,923
- I do wish you'd wait
for me to say, come in
490
00:23:21,923 --> 00:23:23,872
before you come in, Captain Peacock.
491
00:23:23,872 --> 00:23:24,955
- I'm sorry, sir,
492
00:23:24,955 --> 00:23:27,773
but I would like you to
have a look at these,
493
00:23:27,773 --> 00:23:32,672
all discovered by me in
the Gentlemen's Outfitting.
494
00:23:32,672 --> 00:23:35,128
- I would suggest that the
Lost Property Department
495
00:23:35,128 --> 00:23:36,603
would be more appropriate.
496
00:23:36,603 --> 00:23:38,381
- No, sir, these are not lost.
497
00:23:38,381 --> 00:23:40,101
But I would draw your
attention to the fact
498
00:23:40,101 --> 00:23:42,280
that they are all heating devices.
499
00:23:42,280 --> 00:23:44,912
- It's hardly a startling revelation.
500
00:23:44,912 --> 00:23:48,031
- Isn't half hot in here, isn't it?
501
00:23:48,031 --> 00:23:50,540
- If that's all, Captain
Peacock, I am rather busy.
502
00:23:50,540 --> 00:23:52,718
- Perhaps, sir, if I
explained it step by step,
503
00:23:52,718 --> 00:23:55,506
it might perhaps help to clear the air.
504
00:23:55,506 --> 00:23:58,261
- I wouldn't bank on it.
505
00:23:58,261 --> 00:24:01,512
- Oh, I say, they've been
in there for 10 minutes.
506
00:24:01,512 --> 00:24:03,752
- There's nobody to
attend to their customers.
507
00:24:03,752 --> 00:24:05,478
- But there aren't any customers.
508
00:24:05,478 --> 00:24:08,341
- That's neither here nor there.
509
00:24:08,341 --> 00:24:10,421
That's no way to run a store.
510
00:24:10,421 --> 00:24:12,531
- We could always give them a hand.
511
00:24:12,531 --> 00:24:16,552
- I'm not measuring a man
for a pair of trousers.
512
00:24:16,552 --> 00:24:18,885
Unless it was Steve McQueen.
513
00:24:19,832 --> 00:24:21,971
- You'd never get him in Grace Brothers.
514
00:24:21,971 --> 00:24:22,804
- True.
515
00:24:24,261 --> 00:24:26,181
- You mean that, contrary
to my instructions,
516
00:24:26,181 --> 00:24:28,312
all these heating
appliances have been used
517
00:24:28,312 --> 00:24:30,672
behind my back, under my very nose?
518
00:24:30,672 --> 00:24:33,272
- It doesn't seem possible, does it, sir?
519
00:24:33,272 --> 00:24:37,048
I regret to say that Mr.
Lucas procured this equipment.
520
00:24:37,048 --> 00:24:40,465
- Well, I wasn't only thinking of myself.
521
00:24:41,637 --> 00:24:42,968
I mean, there was,
522
00:24:42,968 --> 00:24:46,248
there was Mr. Humphries and
Mr. Grainger to consider.
523
00:24:46,248 --> 00:24:48,768
- Were you a party to this, Mr. Grainger?
524
00:24:48,768 --> 00:24:51,667
- Me, most certainly not.
525
00:24:51,667 --> 00:24:52,797
- Of course he wasn't.
526
00:24:52,797 --> 00:24:57,499
He thought I took his thermal
pad just to breathe on it.
527
00:24:57,499 --> 00:24:58,683
- I'm appalled.
528
00:24:58,683 --> 00:25:01,477
- Then what are you going
to do about it, sir?
529
00:25:01,477 --> 00:25:04,836
- Can you smell something in here?
530
00:25:04,836 --> 00:25:06,188
- If you'd all like to leave now,
531
00:25:06,188 --> 00:25:08,376
I'd like a few moments to think it over.
532
00:25:08,376 --> 00:25:09,209
- The place is rather close in here.
533
00:25:09,209 --> 00:25:12,244
- Mr. Lucas, I'm coming
over faint, I'm sure--
534
00:25:12,244 --> 00:25:13,327
- I give off a lot of body heat.
535
00:25:13,327 --> 00:25:15,787
- Must be his metabolism.
536
00:25:15,787 --> 00:25:16,728
- It's on fire!
537
00:25:16,728 --> 00:25:17,561
- What?
538
00:25:17,561 --> 00:25:19,026
- It's all right!
- Good heavens!
539
00:25:19,026 --> 00:25:20,381
- It's all right, I'll get it!
540
00:25:20,381 --> 00:25:22,457
It's all right, Mr. Rumbold!
541
00:25:22,457 --> 00:25:26,624
(audience laughing)
(audience applauding)
542
00:25:30,588 --> 00:25:32,683
- I think we must congratulate Mr. Lucas
543
00:25:32,683 --> 00:25:33,839
on his timely action.
544
00:25:33,839 --> 00:25:35,617
- I think we should
congratulate Mr. Rumbold
545
00:25:35,617 --> 00:25:36,919
on his explanation of how
546
00:25:36,919 --> 00:25:38,188
he put the electric fire in the drawer
547
00:25:38,188 --> 00:25:39,590
so that nobody could use it,
548
00:25:39,590 --> 00:25:41,228
then accidentally switched it on
549
00:25:41,228 --> 00:25:44,517
by kicking his foot
against the wall switch.
550
00:25:44,517 --> 00:25:48,047
- It's a most extraordinary
chain of events.
551
00:25:48,047 --> 00:25:49,399
I think, in the circumstances,
552
00:25:49,399 --> 00:25:51,257
we should close the department for the day
553
00:25:51,257 --> 00:25:52,847
due to the extreme cold.
554
00:25:52,847 --> 00:25:53,889
- Hear, hear.
555
00:25:53,889 --> 00:25:57,276
- I shall notify Mr. Grace of my decision.
556
00:25:57,276 --> 00:25:58,943
- Now's your chance.
557
00:26:03,569 --> 00:26:05,020
- Morning, everybody.
558
00:26:05,020 --> 00:26:07,187
- Good morning, Mr. Grace.
559
00:26:08,289 --> 00:26:10,969
- I think you've all done very well
560
00:26:10,969 --> 00:26:13,655
working in these cold conditions.
561
00:26:13,655 --> 00:26:16,347
- [All] Thank you, Mr. Grace.
562
00:26:16,347 --> 00:26:17,796
- I've brought you good news.
563
00:26:17,796 --> 00:26:20,052
- We've had good news,
we'll be going home.
564
00:26:20,052 --> 00:26:22,900
- I've just got the
heating turned on again.
565
00:26:22,900 --> 00:26:25,483
- But I thought there was no fuel left.
566
00:26:25,483 --> 00:26:28,018
- Well you see, I happen to own
567
00:26:28,018 --> 00:26:30,268
the Wharfside Coke Company.
568
00:26:31,271 --> 00:26:34,409
- How very fortuitous, Mr. Grace.
569
00:26:34,409 --> 00:26:35,679
- But I thought your men
570
00:26:35,679 --> 00:26:37,289
were all on strike, Mr. Grace.
571
00:26:37,289 --> 00:26:40,527
- Ah, yes, yes, but I've sacked the men
572
00:26:40,527 --> 00:26:43,169
and had the warehouse chopped up.
573
00:26:43,169 --> 00:26:46,919
That should keep our
boilers going for a bit.
574
00:26:48,317 --> 00:26:49,995
- That's the way to treat the workers,
575
00:26:49,995 --> 00:26:50,828
Mr. Grace.
576
00:26:50,828 --> 00:26:52,245
- Well, carry on.
577
00:26:55,068 --> 00:26:57,241
You've all done very well.
578
00:26:57,241 --> 00:26:59,595
- [All] Thank you, Mr. Grace.
579
00:26:59,595 --> 00:27:03,195
(audience applauding)
580
00:27:03,195 --> 00:27:05,875
- Well, I think in the circumstances,
581
00:27:05,875 --> 00:27:09,147
we can overlook the illicit
use of heating appliances.
582
00:27:09,147 --> 00:27:11,145
Back to your places, everyone.
583
00:27:11,145 --> 00:27:13,857
- Actually, I have a confession to make.
584
00:27:13,857 --> 00:27:16,678
I took the liberty of having
a little nip of something
585
00:27:16,678 --> 00:27:18,564
to keep me warm.
586
00:27:18,564 --> 00:27:21,158
- I wouldn't have minded
a drop myself, Betty.
587
00:27:21,158 --> 00:27:23,075
- Be my guest, Stephen.
588
00:27:25,398 --> 00:27:28,390
It's secreted in the perfume display.
589
00:27:28,390 --> 00:27:30,038
- How ingenious.
590
00:27:30,038 --> 00:27:31,259
- Open your mouth.
591
00:27:31,259 --> 00:27:33,358
- As there are no customers around.
592
00:27:33,358 --> 00:27:37,017
- This'll put the roses
back in your cheeks.
593
00:27:37,017 --> 00:27:38,838
(gagging)
594
00:27:38,838 --> 00:27:43,005
(audience laughing)
(audience applauding)
595
00:27:45,104 --> 00:27:46,474
♫ Ground floor, perfumery
596
00:27:46,474 --> 00:27:47,925
♫ Stationery and leather goods
597
00:27:47,925 --> 00:27:49,324
♫ Wigs and haberdashery
598
00:27:49,324 --> 00:27:53,407
♫ Kitchenware and food, going up
599
00:27:56,525 --> 00:27:59,533
♫ First floor, telephones,
gents ready made suits
600
00:27:59,533 --> 00:28:01,304
♫ Shirts, hats, ties
601
00:28:01,304 --> 00:28:05,387
♫ Underwear, and shoes, going up
602
00:28:08,045 --> 00:28:09,434
♫ Second floor, carpets
603
00:28:09,434 --> 00:28:10,944
♫ Travel goods and bedding
604
00:28:10,944 --> 00:28:12,573
♫ Materials, soft furnishings
605
00:28:12,573 --> 00:28:15,351
♫ Restaurant and teas, going down
606
00:28:15,351 --> 00:28:18,518
(audience applauding)
43922
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