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1
00:00:19,185 --> 00:00:23,322
[Man] Mars surface ops,
this is Houston. We're go for data.
2
00:00:23,390 --> 00:00:27,693
[Man #2] Copy, Houston. Base pedal
temp good. Remote pedal actuator good.
3
00:00:27,761 --> 00:00:32,264
Probe primary and auxiliary
transponders a-okay.
4
00:00:32,332 --> 00:00:34,867
Shunt voltage three zero.
5
00:00:34,934 --> 00:00:39,938
[Man #1]
D.S.N. uplink rate is now 61.101.
6
00:00:40,006 --> 00:00:42,107
Copy. We'll see if we
can better that for you.
7
00:00:42,175 --> 00:00:44,309
This is the probe's
8
00:00:44,377 --> 00:00:46,645
We need all the data we can get.
9
00:00:46,713 --> 00:00:51,750
Uh, standby.
We're getting a low current level here.
10
00:00:51,818 --> 00:00:55,421
Voltage is down to, uh, 185.
11
00:00:55,488 --> 00:00:59,224
[Man #2]
Here's our rock, fellas. One-one-niner.
12
00:00:59,292 --> 00:01:01,493
-Beautiful.
-There it is again. There it is again.
13
00:01:01,561 --> 00:01:04,797
Voltage down to 113.
14
00:01:04,864 --> 00:01:06,965
-Can you repo the solar arrays?
-[Man #2] Uh, negative.
15
00:01:07,033 --> 00:01:09,301
M.P.C. load is critical.
16
00:01:09,369 --> 00:01:11,570
-[Beeping]
-Mars surface ops,
we're losing the signal.
17
00:01:11,638 --> 00:01:14,740
-We're losing the signal here!
-[Crackling]
18
00:01:14,808 --> 00:01:19,812
Roger that.
Transmission terminated.
19
00:01:19,879 --> 00:01:22,848
-Well, people, congratulations.
-[Smattering Of Applause]
20
00:01:22,916 --> 00:01:26,285
We collected data
on over a dozen new rocks.
21
00:01:26,352 --> 00:01:31,423
I'd say this was five years
and three trillion dollars well spent!
22
00:01:31,491 --> 00:01:35,494
[Cheering]
23
00:01:36,729 --> 00:01:39,832
[Brakes Screeching]
24
00:01:39,899 --> 00:01:42,534
[Horn Honking]
25
00:01:53,246 --> 00:01:55,714
[Tires Squealing]
26
00:02:07,927 --> 00:02:10,629
[Grunts]
27
00:02:10,697 --> 00:02:15,267
[Grunts]
28
00:02:17,370 --> 00:02:20,339
Come on, gentlemen, keep up with me.
I want an exclusive...
29
00:02:20,406 --> 00:02:22,508
with that policeman who was
in the Santa Barbara shootout.
30
00:02:22,575 --> 00:02:24,576
-I'll take it.
-Glad you could make it, O'Hara.
31
00:02:24,644 --> 00:02:27,212
Prescott, it's yours.
Take Harrison and camera car five.
32
00:02:27,280 --> 00:02:29,548
I want it for the 6:00.
It's no good at 10:00. You got that?
33
00:02:29,616 --> 00:02:32,584
-It's no good at 10:00.
-What are you, a parrot? Get movin'.
34
00:02:32,652 --> 00:02:36,188
I want footage of that 1st Monument Bank
that got knocked off down in Oxnard.
35
00:02:36,256 --> 00:02:38,257
-I'm all over it.
-Van Gundy?
36
00:02:38,324 --> 00:02:40,492
-Sir!
-And get that security camera's
videotape, you got that?
37
00:02:40,560 --> 00:02:42,728
-Yeah, mm-hmm.
-No tape, no story.
38
00:02:42,795 --> 00:02:45,497
You got it, boss.
Whatever you say, boss.
39
00:02:45,565 --> 00:02:49,935
I like Van Gundy.
I need something on that
shuttle launch tonight at Vandenberg.
40
00:02:50,003 --> 00:02:52,437
-Well, that's me.
I know Vandenberg, chief.
-Chief?
41
00:02:52,505 --> 00:02:55,040
Who are you, Clark Kent?
FFelix, it's yours.
42
00:02:55,108 --> 00:02:57,576
Get interviews
with all the top brass involved.
43
00:02:57,644 --> 00:03:00,846
Oh, take Brace with you. It's a good
story for her to cut her teeth on.
44
00:03:00,914 --> 00:03:04,750
Brace? Are you sure? Because I usually
produce Brace's on-camera segments.
45
00:03:04,817 --> 00:03:08,587
We're a team. I mean, we're more
than a team. Brace and I are--
46
00:03:08,655 --> 00:03:11,356
You and my daughter are what?
47
00:03:15,628 --> 00:03:19,364
-Um, nothing.
-That's right.
48
00:03:19,432 --> 00:03:22,267
I didn't send Brace to all those
fancy English boarding schools...
49
00:03:22,335 --> 00:03:25,737
to wind up with the likes of you.
50
00:03:25,805 --> 00:03:29,975
Oh, O'Hara, I've got something here
that's right up your alley.
51
00:03:30,043 --> 00:03:33,312
A senior citizens' tanning contest
being held tomorrow at Sunset Pier.
52
00:03:33,379 --> 00:03:36,415
The Hawaiian Tropic Senior
Cocoa Butter Classic.
53
00:03:36,482 --> 00:03:38,984
-Huh?
-[Reporters Laughing]
54
00:03:39,052 --> 00:03:41,220
I want footage
of all the old farts baking,
55
00:03:41,287 --> 00:03:45,757
an interview with the doctor on
the dangers of sunbathing, yadda, yadda.
56
00:03:45,825 --> 00:03:50,629
Something to fill time
if my idiot weatherman runs short.
57
00:03:52,899 --> 00:03:55,934
Mr. Channing? Mr. Channing?
Excuse me. Sir?
58
00:03:56,002 --> 00:04:01,006
You hired me because I had ten years'
experience as a newspaper reporter.
59
00:04:01,074 --> 00:04:04,977
Now, I will go to the ends of the Earth
to bring you a great story.
60
00:04:05,044 --> 00:04:08,180
But I need the chance.
61
00:04:08,248 --> 00:04:13,252
You know, Tim, when I look at you,
I see myself at your age.
62
00:04:13,319 --> 00:04:16,188
-Really?
-And I was a moron!
63
00:04:16,256 --> 00:04:19,658
-Huh.
-But you got a lot of nerve,
O'Hara, and I like that.
64
00:04:19,726 --> 00:04:22,327
Sometimes.
Okay, it's yours.
65
00:04:22,395 --> 00:04:24,796
-B-B-B-But you said--
-Shut up, Felix.
66
00:04:24,864 --> 00:04:27,132
You won't-- You won't regret this, sir.
You really won't.
67
00:04:27,200 --> 00:04:31,603
O'Hara! You screw up this Vandenberg
thing, you're fired. Is that clear?
68
00:04:31,671 --> 00:04:34,940
Yeah.
Crystal.
69
00:04:35,008 --> 00:04:37,009
[Man Over Loudspeaker]
Attention, all personnel.
70
00:04:37,076 --> 00:04:39,311
We are T minus five minutes
and counting.
71
00:04:39,379 --> 00:04:42,214
We're here at the Vandenberg Air Force
Base, where for the first time,
72
00:04:42,282 --> 00:04:44,783
-Cut. Brace?
-the shuttle Atlantis
will be launched...
73
00:04:44,851 --> 00:04:47,686
-Sweetie, could we lose the gum?
-Billy!
74
00:04:47,754 --> 00:04:49,788
Excuse me, Sergeant.
75
00:04:49,856 --> 00:04:51,890
-[Spits]
-I love show business.
76
00:04:51,958 --> 00:04:54,226
Yeah, okay. Everybody back
to one, please. Here we go.
77
00:04:54,294 --> 00:04:59,331
Same thing.
In five, four, three, two--
78
00:04:59,399 --> 00:05:01,400
We're here at Vandenberg Air Force Base.
79
00:05:01,467 --> 00:05:03,802
-We're here
at Vandenberg Air Force Base,
-Where just minutes from now,
80
00:05:03,870 --> 00:05:07,806
where just minutes from now,
the shuttle Atlantis will be
launching for the first time...
81
00:05:07,874 --> 00:05:09,908
-on the west coast.
-I understand that Project Deadhead...
82
00:05:09,976 --> 00:05:14,212
I understand that Project Deadhead
is carrying a sophisticated satellite...
83
00:05:14,280 --> 00:05:17,983
-to study the Fiona comet.
-to study the Fiona comet.
84
00:05:18,051 --> 00:05:21,053
Yes, the satellite has
a specialized guidance system...
85
00:05:21,120 --> 00:05:24,523
which will allow it to pass
closer to the comet than ever before.
86
00:05:24,590 --> 00:05:26,591
Yeah, yeah.
Is Jerry Garcia on board?
87
00:05:26,659 --> 00:05:28,860
What?
88
00:05:28,928 --> 00:05:32,164
Is Jerry Garcia on board?
89
00:05:32,231 --> 00:05:35,867
Is Jerry Garcia on board?
90
00:05:35,935 --> 00:05:39,171
-Well, yes, actually.
-Yes!
91
00:05:39,238 --> 00:05:41,907
Project Deadhead
gets its name from the fact...
92
00:05:41,974 --> 00:05:45,610
that its payload includes
the ashes of famous rocker...
93
00:05:45,678 --> 00:05:47,746
Jerry Garcia of the Grateful Dead.
94
00:05:47,814 --> 00:05:49,915
How in the world
did you know that?
95
00:05:49,982 --> 00:05:52,784
-It's my job to know that.
-It's my job to know these things.
96
00:05:52,852 --> 00:05:55,487
Well.
97
00:05:59,325 --> 00:06:04,029
[Cheering, Applause]
98
00:06:13,639 --> 00:06:17,409
-Okay, Lizzie, go to Brace.
-[Cheering Continues]
99
00:06:17,477 --> 00:06:20,112
All right, Brace, here we go.
The big wrap-up.
100
00:06:20,179 --> 00:06:23,382
-And so, on this the night
of the Fiona Comet,
-And so, on this,
101
00:06:23,449 --> 00:06:26,118
the night of the Fiona Comet,
our thoughts turn...
102
00:06:26,185 --> 00:06:29,654
to that satellite's only passenger--
Jerry Garcia.
103
00:06:29,722 --> 00:06:33,925
-I'm Brace Channing--
-I'm Brace Channing for KGSC.
104
00:06:33,993 --> 00:06:36,261
-Thank you, Captain Dalton.
-Thank you.
105
00:06:36,329 --> 00:06:40,799
-God, you're beautiful.
-God, you're beautiful.
106
00:06:40,867 --> 00:06:45,437
-[Gasps]
-Thank you. So are you.
107
00:06:45,505 --> 00:06:47,606
[Exhales]
And we're out.
108
00:06:47,673 --> 00:06:51,877
-Tim, I'd like a word with you.
-And I'm dead.
109
00:06:53,179 --> 00:06:56,648
-Colonel?
-Yes?
110
00:06:56,716 --> 00:07:00,185
-You might want to take
a look at this, sir.
-The Fiona Comet?
111
00:07:00,253 --> 00:07:03,321
-So what?
-It's changing direction, sir.
112
00:07:03,389 --> 00:07:06,491
That's impossible. Are you sure it's not
the trajectory of our own satellite?
113
00:07:06,559 --> 00:07:10,162
Yes, sir. Uh, the comet's
just changed direction again, sir.
114
00:07:10,229 --> 00:07:12,597
-It's gotta be the equipment.
-I've got down line confirmation.
115
00:07:12,665 --> 00:07:15,767
No, sir. Our backup computers
verify all systems go.
116
00:07:15,835 --> 00:07:18,670
It's-- It's coming down, sir.
117
00:07:18,738 --> 00:07:22,674
-The satellite?
-No, sir. The comet.
118
00:07:22,742 --> 00:07:24,843
Okay, let's go to general alert.
119
00:07:24,911 --> 00:07:26,945
-Major, scramble the F-16s.
-Yes, sir!
120
00:07:27,013 --> 00:07:29,114
-Sergeant, get SETI group on the line.
-Copy that.
121
00:07:29,182 --> 00:07:32,284
Showtime, boys.
We got ourselves a U.F.O.
122
00:07:32,351 --> 00:07:35,987
Excuse me.
123
00:07:36,055 --> 00:07:39,458
-What's this?
-It's Capt. Dalton's telephone number.
124
00:07:39,525 --> 00:07:42,561
Well, he's not really my type, but--
125
00:07:42,628 --> 00:07:45,230
-You made me look such an idiot.
-Brace, come on.
126
00:07:45,298 --> 00:07:48,400
-Let me explain.
-Just wait until I tell my daddy.
127
00:07:48,468 --> 00:07:51,036
-No, Br-- Brace, come on!
-Billy!
128
00:07:51,103 --> 00:07:53,138
-Wait a minute! Look, I--
-Nice knowin' ya.
129
00:07:53,206 --> 00:07:55,841
Ooh-hoo.
Let us know where you end up.
130
00:07:55,908 --> 00:07:58,510
-[Sighs]
-It wasn't a complete disaster.
131
00:07:58,578 --> 00:08:00,846
Oh, compared to what?
132
00:08:00,913 --> 00:08:02,914
-The Hindenburg?
-[Chuckles]
133
00:08:02,982 --> 00:08:05,750
Titanic.
I'm sorry, pal.
134
00:08:05,818 --> 00:08:08,153
[Chuckles]
Thanks. Thanks a lot.
135
00:08:08,221 --> 00:08:10,455
Sorry.
136
00:08:19,432 --> 00:08:22,868
The blues kept knockin'
upon my door
137
00:08:22,935 --> 00:08:24,870
-[Radio Stations Changing]
-[Voice On Radio]
Get your nose up! Pull up!
138
00:08:24,937 --> 00:08:27,939
I said up, not out of joint!
139
00:08:28,007 --> 00:08:31,243
We're goin' down!
140
00:08:31,310 --> 00:08:34,579
-Mayday! Mayday!
-Oh, not another ticket.
141
00:08:34,647 --> 00:08:36,781
[Engine Roaring]
142
00:08:42,755 --> 00:08:47,592
-Whoa!
-[Tires Squealing]
143
00:08:47,660 --> 00:08:51,997
[Electronic Bleeping]
144
00:09:01,440 --> 00:09:03,542
[Breathing Heavily]
145
00:09:05,878 --> 00:09:08,480
[Gasps]
146
00:09:08,548 --> 00:09:10,815
-[Tires Screeching]
-Aaah!
147
00:09:10,883 --> 00:09:13,618
Are you crazy?
You could have totalled my car!
148
00:09:13,686 --> 00:09:15,720
-Did you see it? Did you see it?
-See what?
149
00:09:15,788 --> 00:09:17,889
[Stammering]
There was a crash. A plane or some--
150
00:09:17,957 --> 00:09:19,958
It was like a stealth fighter!
I don't know!
151
00:09:20,026 --> 00:09:23,828
-It happened so fast!
-Oh, my God, a plane crash!
152
00:09:23,896 --> 00:09:27,299
Well, that's terrible!
We don't even have any video!
153
00:09:27,366 --> 00:09:30,068
Good! It's over here.
154
00:09:30,136 --> 00:09:32,804
-[Brace] Tim, wait for me!
-Humans.
155
00:09:32,872 --> 00:09:37,242
-Wait, not so fast!
It's my story too, remember?
-[Electronic Beeping]
156
00:09:43,149 --> 00:09:46,017
-[Tim] What was that?
-[Brace] Hmm? What was what?
157
00:09:46,085 --> 00:09:48,587
It was this flicker, this--
this light that--
158
00:09:48,654 --> 00:09:51,590
-Never mind.
-What, Tim?
159
00:09:51,657 --> 00:09:54,659
Tim, wait!
Oh, my heel!
160
00:09:54,727 --> 00:09:57,662
These are really expensive shoes,
you know!
161
00:09:59,865 --> 00:10:03,034
-[Gasps]
-[Breathing]
162
00:10:03,102 --> 00:10:05,203
Come on, Tim, where is it?
163
00:10:05,271 --> 00:10:08,440
It was this huge thing!
It was this--
164
00:10:08,507 --> 00:10:12,177
You know, it's really creepy out here.
165
00:10:12,244 --> 00:10:15,580
[Grunting]
Ow!
166
00:10:18,284 --> 00:10:20,318
Tim?
167
00:10:20,386 --> 00:10:24,289
-You've got 30 seconds and I'm leaving!
-Hmm.
168
00:10:24,357 --> 00:10:27,359
[Mumbling]
169
00:10:29,595 --> 00:10:32,063
[Groans]
170
00:10:32,131 --> 00:10:34,299
-Look at this.
-[Screams] What's that?
171
00:10:34,367 --> 00:10:37,002
I don't know.
I-I-- I don't know.
172
00:10:37,069 --> 00:10:40,972
-Is this your idea of a joke?
-No, I swear to you-- look at--
I mean, this thing was huge.
173
00:10:41,040 --> 00:10:44,976
Oh, really? And I thought
you were one of the normal ones!
174
00:10:45,044 --> 00:10:48,079
-[Alien Breathing Heavily]
-I am one of the normal ones, normally.
175
00:10:48,147 --> 00:10:50,515
[Scoffs]
Ha ha ha.
176
00:10:50,583 --> 00:10:54,219
[Scoffs]
Nice try, Tim.
177
00:10:54,286 --> 00:10:58,356
You and me, alone on the beach, on
the night of a lunar eclipse, no less.
178
00:10:58,424 --> 00:11:01,393
-I didn't make this up!
-Keep this as a memento
of our last date.
179
00:11:01,460 --> 00:11:04,095
Last date?
We haven't even had our first date!
180
00:11:04,163 --> 00:11:06,731
-[Engine Starting]
-Well, consider this both.
181
00:11:06,799 --> 00:11:09,634
-Brace? Brace!
-[Tires Screeching]
182
00:11:11,937 --> 00:11:14,172
[Grunting]
183
00:11:14,240 --> 00:11:17,042
[Grunting]
Ahh.
184
00:11:17,109 --> 00:11:21,179
Nurplex.
Ay-yi-yi-yi mmm!
185
00:11:28,854 --> 00:11:31,690
[Car Sputtering]
186
00:11:35,828 --> 00:11:39,898
[Inhales Deeply]
Humans.
187
00:11:39,965 --> 00:11:42,967
-Come on, come on, come on.
-[Engine Sputtering]
188
00:11:46,806 --> 00:11:51,476
-Savages!
-[Car Sputters, Turns Over]
189
00:12:09,161 --> 00:12:11,796
[Backfires]
190
00:12:14,333 --> 00:12:19,337
[Car Sputtering, Backfiring]
191
00:12:32,585 --> 00:12:34,419
-Tim!
-Aaah! Mrs. Brown.
192
00:12:34,487 --> 00:12:37,255
-Too much lipstick?
-Uh, well,
193
00:12:37,323 --> 00:12:39,858
no, no, no, no.
194
00:12:39,925 --> 00:12:43,128
No, it's just that you, uh...
195
00:12:43,195 --> 00:12:45,330
kind of appeared, that's all.
196
00:12:45,397 --> 00:12:47,665
I saved you some
of my special brownies.
197
00:12:47,733 --> 00:12:50,001
Mrs. Brown, brownies. Get it?
[Chuckles]
198
00:12:50,069 --> 00:12:52,103
-Yes! That's good.
-There you go.
199
00:12:52,171 --> 00:12:54,706
-Thank you very much.
-[Chuckles] Did you see the eclipse?
200
00:12:54,774 --> 00:12:57,642
Wasn't it tr�s magnifique?
201
00:12:57,710 --> 00:13:00,011
-Those French tapes are really
paying off, aren't they?
-Oh, you noticed.
202
00:13:00,079 --> 00:13:02,380
-[Chuckles]
Thanks for the brownies, Mrs. Brown.
-[Chuckles]
203
00:13:02,448 --> 00:13:05,984
Oh, Tim.
I wanted to remind you...
204
00:13:06,051 --> 00:13:08,686
about the charity rummage sale
this weekend.
205
00:13:08,754 --> 00:13:11,556
If you have anything
you want to donate, leave it
in the garage and I'll pick it up.
206
00:13:11,624 --> 00:13:13,992
Well, trust me, this will be
right on top of the pile.
207
00:13:14,059 --> 00:13:17,662
-Ahh.
-Good night, Mrs. Brown.
208
00:13:17,730 --> 00:13:22,000
One more thing I wanted to tell you,
Tim! Oh, good night, Tim!
209
00:13:22,067 --> 00:13:24,636
[Sighs]
210
00:13:37,149 --> 00:13:39,651
I'm havin' a bad night.
211
00:13:39,718 --> 00:13:42,520
I couldn't agree with ya
more completely.
212
00:13:42,588 --> 00:13:45,990
-Shut up.
-How do you do it?
213
00:13:46,058 --> 00:13:49,227
-[Answering Machine Beeps]
-O'Hara here. Please leave a message.
Make it short.
214
00:13:49,295 --> 00:13:53,998
-[Answering Machine Beeps]
-Channing here. You're fired.
215
00:13:54,066 --> 00:13:56,367
-Short enough for ya?
-[Receiver Clicks]
216
00:13:56,435 --> 00:13:59,737
What more can I say?
When you're right, you're right!
217
00:14:00,973 --> 00:14:03,274
[Wheezing]
218
00:14:03,342 --> 00:14:08,413
[Coughing]
219
00:14:20,159 --> 00:14:22,260
[Electronic Whirring]
220
00:14:25,831 --> 00:14:28,199
[Gasps]
Hmm.
221
00:14:38,277 --> 00:14:41,279
[Groans]
222
00:14:46,652 --> 00:14:50,221
[Gasps]
Stay where you are, little Earth man,
223
00:14:50,289 --> 00:14:52,423
and no harm will come to you.
224
00:14:52,491 --> 00:14:55,994
Say, I wish I'd thought of that!
225
00:14:56,061 --> 00:14:59,797
-[Tim] Hello?
-What more can I say?
When you're right, you're right!
226
00:14:59,865 --> 00:15:02,433
-Be silent.
-How do you do it?
227
00:15:02,501 --> 00:15:05,103
I thought I told you to shut up.
228
00:15:05,170 --> 00:15:07,739
I couldn't agree with you more--
[Muffled]
229
00:15:07,806 --> 00:15:10,341
You leave me no choice.
230
00:15:10,409 --> 00:15:13,711
Who's there?
I got a gun!
231
00:15:26,759 --> 00:15:30,828
Static.
[Groans]
232
00:15:46,679 --> 00:15:51,482
-Hey, buddy. Hey. Hey.
-[Moans Softly]
233
00:15:51,550 --> 00:15:53,851
-Hey! [Grunts]
-That's it, Earthling!
234
00:15:53,919 --> 00:15:58,556
-[Grunting]
-It's alive!
235
00:16:00,059 --> 00:16:01,826
Hyah!
236
00:16:01,894 --> 00:16:05,330
Okay, you wanna play games?
237
00:16:05,397 --> 00:16:09,400
-Slide through.
-I must be going... [Grunts] nuts.
238
00:16:09,468 --> 00:16:13,137
[Laughs]
One strike, no balls.
239
00:16:13,205 --> 00:16:16,374
Over here, Tiger Woods.
[Chuckling]
240
00:16:16,442 --> 00:16:18,676
[Blows Raspberry]
Aaah!
241
00:16:18,744 --> 00:16:23,848
-Hey, look-- Jimmy Hoffa.
-Leisure suit from hell!
242
00:16:23,916 --> 00:16:26,718
[Whimpering]
243
00:16:26,785 --> 00:16:31,189
-I'm gonna...
-Ohh!
244
00:16:31,256 --> 00:16:33,424
mutilate you!
245
00:16:36,795 --> 00:16:40,431
Come on!
Show your face... if you have one.
246
00:16:43,836 --> 00:16:46,904
Where-- Where'd he go?
247
00:16:48,340 --> 00:16:54,412
What the heck
was in those brownies?
248
00:16:54,480 --> 00:16:57,081
When dealing with primitive life-forms,
249
00:16:57,149 --> 00:17:00,051
sometimes one must
resort to primitive acts.
250
00:17:00,119 --> 00:17:03,054
-Are you okay, Zoot?
-[Coughing]
251
00:17:03,122 --> 00:17:06,457
If you don't mind my asking,
where were you?
This alien was trying to kill me!
252
00:17:06,525 --> 00:17:08,226
Don't be such a wet blanket.
253
00:17:08,293 --> 00:17:11,396
Wait a minute.
Leave my mother out of this!
254
00:17:11,463 --> 00:17:13,564
It's your fault we ended up
on this no-good, carbon-based,
255
00:17:13,632 --> 00:17:16,701
-over-oxygenated,
miserable excuse of a--
-[Knock On Door]
256
00:17:16,769 --> 00:17:18,970
-[Woman] Tim?
-Oh, no. It's another one!
257
00:17:19,038 --> 00:17:21,773
I know you're not asleep yet.
258
00:17:21,840 --> 00:17:24,075
Tim, it's Lizzie!
259
00:17:24,143 --> 00:17:26,444
[Gasps]
Blotz! It's Lizzie!
260
00:17:26,512 --> 00:17:28,546
What's a Lizzie?
261
00:17:28,614 --> 00:17:31,482
I would say a Model T Ford,
but this one has better tires.
262
00:17:31,550 --> 00:17:35,119
-Ah-ooga! Ah-ooga!
-I know what a woman is,
but what do I do with it?
263
00:17:35,187 --> 00:17:38,756
Help, Mr. Lifeguard, I'm drowning.
I need mouth-to-mouth.
264
00:17:38,824 --> 00:17:41,225
Ugh, saliva exchange.
265
00:17:41,293 --> 00:17:43,961
I would never partake
in such an unsanitary interaction.
266
00:17:44,029 --> 00:17:46,431
There must be some other way
to greet a female and then be rid of it.
267
00:17:46,498 --> 00:17:48,499
-[Knock On Door]
-Tim!
-[Gasps]
268
00:17:48,567 --> 00:17:50,902
If it was me, I'd be he.
269
00:17:50,969 --> 00:17:54,172
-Tim, please.
-Good thinking, Zoot.
270
00:18:12,524 --> 00:18:15,993
Okay, Tim,
I'm picking up the hide-a-key.
271
00:18:17,696 --> 00:18:21,933
-Gonna open the door.
-[Key Turning]
272
00:18:23,368 --> 00:18:26,270
-Tim?
-Lizzie!
273
00:18:26,338 --> 00:18:28,473
My dear friend or family member.
274
00:18:28,540 --> 00:18:30,975
Uh, oh, my gosh.
275
00:18:31,043 --> 00:18:33,978
Oh, inappropriate.
276
00:18:34,046 --> 00:18:39,150
-Oh, boy.
-[Zoot] I told you
they cover their flingdat here.
277
00:18:39,218 --> 00:18:42,286
Lizzie, my dear friend
or family member.
278
00:18:42,354 --> 00:18:44,555
You sound funny.
Are you catching a cold?
279
00:18:44,623 --> 00:18:46,858
A cold, a virus?
[Deep Voice] Yes.
280
00:18:46,925 --> 00:18:49,393
[Voice Changing] A contagious
bubonic plague. You better leave.
281
00:18:49,461 --> 00:18:52,196
What? What in the world--
282
00:18:52,264 --> 00:18:55,333
Are-- Are you a Trekkie?
283
00:18:55,400 --> 00:18:58,469
Uh, yes, I am.
284
00:18:58,537 --> 00:19:01,005
Okay, what's going on?
285
00:19:01,073 --> 00:19:03,908
-What's going on?
-Tim, are you okay?
286
00:19:03,976 --> 00:19:06,310
-You don't seem like yourself.
-Oh, I'm Tim, all right.
287
00:19:06,378 --> 00:19:09,547
-Tim O'Hara, no reason to doubt it.
-Uh, what's going on?
288
00:19:09,615 --> 00:19:12,083
Lots.
289
00:19:17,256 --> 00:19:19,824
-Mmm.
-Mmm.
290
00:19:24,796 --> 00:19:27,565
-Lizzie.
-Yeah?
291
00:19:27,633 --> 00:19:30,668
If you're my sister,
an explanation is in order.
292
00:19:30,736 --> 00:19:33,938
[Chuckles]
Yeah.
293
00:19:34,006 --> 00:19:36,674
-Does this mean that you and I are--
-Indeed.
294
00:19:36,742 --> 00:19:40,511
-Now, if you'll excuse me,
I have work to do, and you...
-What?
295
00:19:40,579 --> 00:19:42,747
-need...to go.
-Huh?
296
00:19:42,814 --> 00:19:45,983
Wha--
297
00:19:48,353 --> 00:19:51,956
-Human emotions.
-Crazy monkeys.
298
00:19:55,627 --> 00:19:58,296
[Humming]
299
00:19:58,363 --> 00:20:03,100
[Siren]
300
00:20:11,643 --> 00:20:16,280
-[Beeping]
-[Chattering]
301
00:20:18,217 --> 00:20:20,851
Welcome, sir.
302
00:20:22,554 --> 00:20:24,589
Where's Coleye?
303
00:20:24,656 --> 00:20:28,993
Examining mucus-type protoplasm.
304
00:20:30,996 --> 00:20:33,731
Hmm. It's saline-based.
305
00:20:33,799 --> 00:20:37,001
Good God, Coleye,
put that on a slide next time.
306
00:20:37,069 --> 00:20:40,471
I want this stuff analyzed
and the cigarette dusted for prints.
307
00:20:40,539 --> 00:20:44,709
-I want to know whose this was.
-There's more, sir.
308
00:20:45,978 --> 00:20:49,780
[Coleye]
Quadroped becomes... biped?
309
00:20:49,848 --> 00:20:52,783
It must have taken human form!
310
00:20:52,851 --> 00:20:55,286
The footprints stop at the road.
311
00:20:55,354 --> 00:20:57,421
We think someone
may have picked them up.
312
00:20:57,489 --> 00:20:59,924
Evidence of a crash,
313
00:20:59,992 --> 00:21:02,526
no spaceship and alien
in human form?
314
00:21:02,594 --> 00:21:05,129
It's just like the incident of '64!
315
00:21:05,197 --> 00:21:07,765
Keep your mouth shut, you idiot.
316
00:21:07,833 --> 00:21:10,134
That incident is not only classified,
317
00:21:10,202 --> 00:21:12,870
but it never happened, you got it?
318
00:21:12,938 --> 00:21:16,774
-Yes, sir.
-Once again, we have no alien, no U.F.O.
319
00:21:16,842 --> 00:21:19,143
If you can't get me either one,
320
00:21:19,211 --> 00:21:21,279
then you'd better start
looking for another job.
321
00:21:21,346 --> 00:21:24,048
Well, you heard him! Move it!
It's out there somewhere!
322
00:21:24,116 --> 00:21:26,150
-So, move it! Go! Move!
-Yes, sir!
323
00:21:26,218 --> 00:21:30,354
And God help the poor soul...
324
00:21:30,422 --> 00:21:32,857
who picked him up.
325
00:21:42,467 --> 00:21:44,835
[Screams]
326
00:21:44,903 --> 00:21:46,904
Silence, subculturer!
327
00:21:46,972 --> 00:21:51,175
-Let me down!
-Look what you did to me. Barbarian!
328
00:21:51,243 --> 00:21:53,544
-Let me down!
-As you wish!
329
00:21:53,612 --> 00:21:56,314
-[Electronic Buzz]
-[Screams, Crashes]
330
00:21:56,381 --> 00:21:58,549
[Grunts]
331
00:22:00,252 --> 00:22:03,754
For a thief,
you are extremely clumsy.
332
00:22:03,822 --> 00:22:07,358
-Thief? I'm not a thief.
-So I see.
333
00:22:07,426 --> 00:22:10,394
Tim O'Hara.
You are a reporter.
334
00:22:10,462 --> 00:22:13,064
Reporter? No.
I'm a producer, pal!
335
00:22:13,131 --> 00:22:16,434
-Let me tell ya, I-- Aaah!
-[Electronic Buzzing]
336
00:22:16,501 --> 00:22:20,404
Look, I didn't steal anything, okay?
I don't know what you're talking about.
337
00:22:20,472 --> 00:22:23,074
-All right, all right.
-[Electronic Buzzing]
338
00:22:23,141 --> 00:22:26,210
No! No!
[Coughing]
339
00:22:26,278 --> 00:22:29,380
Warning, Tim O'Hara. Any attempt
to expose me will be useless.
340
00:22:29,448 --> 00:22:33,384
Martians use 100% of their brain
capacity, humans less than 10.
341
00:22:33,452 --> 00:22:38,255
-I think we use more than ten.
-Your astronauts
pee in their space suits.
342
00:22:38,323 --> 00:22:41,425
Case closed.
343
00:22:43,161 --> 00:22:45,296
[Grunting]
344
00:22:45,364 --> 00:22:47,798
Okay. Okay, just--
345
00:22:47,866 --> 00:22:52,136
[Electronic Whirring]
346
00:22:55,006 --> 00:22:58,642
Whoa!
347
00:23:04,349 --> 00:23:08,285
Okay, it's just a dream.
It's a very bad dream.
348
00:23:08,353 --> 00:23:13,391
[Panting] Just-- Come on.
Wake up. Wake up!
349
00:23:13,458 --> 00:23:15,993
What's with that?
350
00:23:16,061 --> 00:23:20,264
-I believe it's called
a nervous breakdown.
-Last night did not happen.
351
00:23:20,332 --> 00:23:23,567
-I don't believe in aliens.
-I heard that!
352
00:23:23,635 --> 00:23:27,304
To us, you are the alien.
353
00:23:27,372 --> 00:23:30,141
If you must know,
I am from the planet you call Mars.
354
00:23:30,208 --> 00:23:34,278
-And what, I'm from Uranus? I never--
-I was getting to you!
355
00:23:34,346 --> 00:23:36,514
Don't get a crease in your Sputnik.
356
00:23:36,581 --> 00:23:38,783
[Zoot] Please,
just introduce me to monkey boy.
357
00:23:38,850 --> 00:23:42,953
This is my Zoot.
358
00:23:43,021 --> 00:23:46,657
-A polymorphous Zootenex 3,000.
-Just look, don't touch.
359
00:23:46,725 --> 00:23:50,127
-Your suit talks?
-[Scoffs] Incessantly.
360
00:23:50,195 --> 00:23:52,196
Corduroys talk,
nobody gives them grief.
361
00:23:52,264 --> 00:23:54,298
-[Zoot] Whoosh, whoosh, whoosh.
-Mars? Wait a minute.
362
00:23:54,366 --> 00:23:58,269
[Stuttering] There's no life on Mars.
We've sent probes.
363
00:23:58,336 --> 00:24:01,939
I'd try to explain it, but you people
still think "E" equals "MC" squared.
364
00:24:02,007 --> 00:24:06,143
-You're still trying to
analyze our rocks. Ha-ha!
-[Hydraulic Hissing]
365
00:24:06,211 --> 00:24:09,847
Oh! Blasted sand particles.
366
00:24:09,915 --> 00:24:13,117
They've completely crystallized
the vortex generator.
367
00:24:13,185 --> 00:24:15,653
-Hey, do you mind?
-[Knock On Door]
-[Mrs. Brown] Tim!
368
00:24:15,720 --> 00:24:17,488
-[Gasps]
-Now what?
369
00:24:17,556 --> 00:24:19,957
-Thank God, an eyewitness.
-Eyewitness? Negative.
370
00:24:20,025 --> 00:24:24,195
-You must tell no one.
-No offence, but your ship is
double-parked in my living room.
371
00:24:24,262 --> 00:24:26,730
You're the biggest story
in the history of mankind!
372
00:24:26,798 --> 00:24:29,500
There is intelligent life
out there in the universe!
373
00:24:29,568 --> 00:24:31,335
I hope you're not including yourself
in that statement!
374
00:24:31,403 --> 00:24:34,171
Tim, listen, I'm sorry to bother you
so early in the morning,
375
00:24:34,239 --> 00:24:36,240
but I got a hold of your mail,
and I wanted--
376
00:24:36,308 --> 00:24:39,910
Could you just-- please, come here.
Take a look at that!
377
00:24:39,978 --> 00:24:42,913
[Tim]
Aaah!
378
00:24:42,981 --> 00:24:47,918
Tim, you definitely need a maid!
Oh, hello!
379
00:24:50,121 --> 00:24:54,992
-Greetings.
-Oh, I'm sorry to catch you
in your... pyjamas.
380
00:24:55,060 --> 00:24:58,762
-Pyjamas? [Muffled]
-[Stammering] Where's the spaceship?
381
00:24:58,830 --> 00:25:01,398
-[Mrs. Brown] Spaceship?
-Right here.
382
00:25:01,466 --> 00:25:04,435
Oh, for the rummage sale!
Does it come with an action figure?
383
00:25:04,503 --> 00:25:07,438
-You're looking at him.
-[Chuckles]
Oh. I don't believe we've met.
384
00:25:07,506 --> 00:25:10,541
-No, don't touch him! He's a Martian.
-Tim, what's going on?
385
00:25:10,609 --> 00:25:12,610
-[Stuttering]
-I beg your-- Mart-- Martin?
386
00:25:12,677 --> 00:25:15,246
-Yes. Martin.
-No, no, no, no!
387
00:25:15,313 --> 00:25:17,715
-He's a-- uh--
-Uncle!
388
00:25:17,782 --> 00:25:21,051
-Martin.
-Oh.
389
00:25:21,119 --> 00:25:24,221
-Well, it's a pleasure to meet you.
-He turns invisible, okay?
390
00:25:24,289 --> 00:25:26,290
His suit talks--
he's got a talking suit.
391
00:25:26,358 --> 00:25:28,392
He's got these things that
pop out of his head-- You just--
392
00:25:28,460 --> 00:25:30,928
-Show her. Go ahead.
Come on, give her the finger.
-Tim!
393
00:25:30,996 --> 00:25:35,399
No, I didn't mean that.
I don't know what I mean. Forget it.
394
00:25:35,467 --> 00:25:38,469
You'll have to forgive Tim, Mrs. Brown.
He lost his job last night,
395
00:25:38,537 --> 00:25:40,571
and he's experiencing
a nervous breakdown.
396
00:25:40,639 --> 00:25:42,806
Oh, poor dear.
397
00:25:42,874 --> 00:25:44,909
-I hope it doesn't affect the rent.
-[Laughing Hysterically]
398
00:25:44,976 --> 00:25:47,945
-Don't worry,
I'm here to look after him.
-Ha!
399
00:25:48,013 --> 00:25:51,882
He's very lucky to have
an uncle like you in his life, Martin.
400
00:25:51,950 --> 00:25:55,753
And you, Mrs. Brown,
are like a brilliant quasar
in the black hole of my day.
401
00:25:55,820 --> 00:25:59,056
Oh! Call me Lorelei.
402
00:25:59,124 --> 00:26:01,992
Lorelei.
The sound of...
403
00:26:02,060 --> 00:26:06,096
pure mountain spring water
from the centre of the Earth.
404
00:26:06,164 --> 00:26:08,899
Oh, my.
[Chuckles]
405
00:26:12,070 --> 00:26:16,006
-[Slurping]
-[Stammering]
406
00:26:16,074 --> 00:26:19,009
Oh!
[Chuckles]
407
00:26:19,077 --> 00:26:22,680
I obviously misconstrued a custom.
I apologize.
408
00:26:22,747 --> 00:26:26,116
I'm from... New York.
409
00:26:26,184 --> 00:26:29,086
No, actually, it's--
[Stuttering] It's fine.
410
00:26:29,154 --> 00:26:32,823
[Stuttering]
It's perfect. [Sighs]
411
00:26:32,891 --> 00:26:35,759
-Oh, brother.
-Oh, Martin?
412
00:26:35,827 --> 00:26:37,828
Yes, Lorelei?
413
00:26:37,896 --> 00:26:43,801
Um, Mr. Brown... passed away
several years ago.
414
00:26:43,868 --> 00:26:48,806
-I thought you might like to know that.
-Hmm.
415
00:26:48,873 --> 00:26:52,610
Au revoir.
[Chuckles]
416
00:26:52,677 --> 00:26:54,645
Hmm?
417
00:26:54,713 --> 00:26:57,214
Just for the record,
a handshake will do for me.
418
00:26:57,282 --> 00:26:59,316
[Scoffs]
You think that I actually enjoyed...
419
00:26:59,384 --> 00:27:01,518
tasting that female's exoskeleton?
420
00:27:01,586 --> 00:27:05,489
[Shudders] I merely used my data on
your primitive species to determine...
421
00:27:05,557 --> 00:27:07,958
the optimum way
to avoid suspicion.
422
00:27:08,026 --> 00:27:11,629
-Yeah, but what's the optimum
way to get home?
-[Scoffs] Blotz!
423
00:27:11,696 --> 00:27:16,133
I don't know, Zoot. Where on this
barbaric swamp of a planet...
424
00:27:16,201 --> 00:27:19,470
can we find the makings
of an electron accelerator?
425
00:27:19,537 --> 00:27:22,539
-[Zoot]
Maybe your new girlfriend has one.
-Oh, that's very funny.
426
00:27:22,607 --> 00:27:25,976
Excuse me. Fellas,
I don't mean to interrupt, but...
427
00:27:26,044 --> 00:27:31,181
I-I, you know, I think I might be able
to help you find that electron thing.
428
00:27:31,249 --> 00:27:32,983
We're toast.
429
00:27:33,051 --> 00:27:35,819
I don't believe this.
You really think you can...
430
00:27:35,887 --> 00:27:37,888
repair your ship
with all this junk?
431
00:27:37,956 --> 00:27:40,257
Everything has been carefully chosen
for its potential to fashion...
432
00:27:40,325 --> 00:27:42,893
a crude vortex electron accelerator.
433
00:27:42,961 --> 00:27:45,929
Except for this.
A pooper scooper.
434
00:27:45,997 --> 00:27:48,732
I have no idea what it does,
but it's fascinating.
435
00:27:48,800 --> 00:27:53,337
Excuse me. Where are your
nuclear implosion couplers?
436
00:27:53,405 --> 00:27:55,839
For a garden hose?
437
00:27:57,642 --> 00:28:00,577
I'm never going to get off
this infernal planet.
438
00:28:00,645 --> 00:28:02,846
[Zoot]
The I.Q. of a pancake.
439
00:28:02,914 --> 00:28:04,948
You're right. Humans are truly
the amoebas of the universe!
440
00:28:05,016 --> 00:28:07,618
Yeah, this from a guy
who talks to his tin foil suit.
441
00:28:07,686 --> 00:28:10,788
-Hey, what was that for?
-It wasn't me, it was Zoot.
442
00:28:10,855 --> 00:28:14,958
-[Zoot Laughing]
-Come here a sec.
443
00:28:15,026 --> 00:28:17,761
Listen, you've been on Earth,
what, all of ten minutes?
444
00:28:17,829 --> 00:28:20,264
-It's not so bad here.
-[Chuckles] That's what Neenurt said.
445
00:28:20,331 --> 00:28:24,234
-Who?
-Exactly. One of my planet's
most gifted scientists,
446
00:28:24,302 --> 00:28:26,904
and now he's gone without a trace.
447
00:28:26,971 --> 00:28:30,774
He arrived on Earth in 1964,
and, I presume, was abducted
by your government.
448
00:28:30,842 --> 00:28:32,976
I shudder to think what they did to him
in the name of science.
449
00:28:33,044 --> 00:28:37,314
-What are they laughing at?
-[Laughing] Hey, space man!
450
00:28:37,382 --> 00:28:40,451
-I've been discovered!
-[Electronic Buzz]
-[Gasps]
451
00:28:40,518 --> 00:28:43,053
-[Grunting]
-Sorry about that.
452
00:28:43,121 --> 00:28:44,822
-Oh, my--
-What happened?
453
00:28:44,889 --> 00:28:47,157
They don't know anything.
They were just making fun of your--
454
00:28:47,225 --> 00:28:50,661
Making fun. I'm one of
the best-dressed beings on my planet.
455
00:28:50,729 --> 00:28:52,763
[Man]
Yo, Elvis! Nice suit.
456
00:28:52,831 --> 00:28:57,101
Well, Dorothy, I hate to tell you this,
but you're not in Kansas any more.
457
00:28:57,168 --> 00:28:59,269
[Zoot] That's great.
The minute I turn my back,
458
00:28:59,337 --> 00:29:01,772
you're getting into
someone else's pants!
459
00:29:01,840 --> 00:29:04,908
[Martin] I need to blend in,
and you stand out like a putt
stick at a blackbell convention.
460
00:29:04,976 --> 00:29:06,977
[Zoot] I should have known
by the way you've been gawking...
461
00:29:07,045 --> 00:29:09,113
at every T-shirt
and sweat pant we pass.
462
00:29:09,180 --> 00:29:12,516
-Don't come apart at the seams!
-Why is Zoot always the last to know?
463
00:29:12,584 --> 00:29:14,952
-All right, all right, all right!
-[Zoot Sobbing]
464
00:29:15,019 --> 00:29:18,856
-Martian footage, take one.
-Zoot, this is tearing me apart too.
465
00:29:18,923 --> 00:29:21,759
[Zoot]
I know I'm not what I used to be.
466
00:29:21,826 --> 00:29:24,661
I mean, a stretch mark here,
a line stain there.
467
00:29:24,729 --> 00:29:27,030
[Zoot Sobbing]
468
00:29:27,098 --> 00:29:30,701
[Screams]
469
00:29:30,769 --> 00:29:33,504
-Hey!
-Pervert!
470
00:29:33,571 --> 00:29:36,607
It's not safe
for a woman around here!
471
00:29:36,674 --> 00:29:38,742
I'm ready to blend in now.
472
00:29:43,281 --> 00:29:46,617
-Outstanding.
-Martin, that outfit looks ridic--
473
00:29:46,684 --> 00:29:49,386
-Stylin', bro!
-Thanks, bro.
474
00:29:49,454 --> 00:29:51,488
[Chuckles]
Real cool.
475
00:29:51,556 --> 00:29:53,557
I've got the touch on two planets.
476
00:29:53,625 --> 00:29:55,959
I gotta get out more.
How did your Zoot take the--
477
00:29:56,027 --> 00:29:58,328
Zoot, he's highly intelligent.
He understands.
478
00:29:58,396 --> 00:30:01,865
Aaaah!
You used me, you buttonhole!
479
00:30:01,933 --> 00:30:06,036
-Go and have your fling.
Colours fade! You'll see!
-[Knock On Door]
480
00:30:06,104 --> 00:30:08,472
-Hello?
-Huh? Oh, incoming.
481
00:30:08,540 --> 00:30:11,275
Hello?
Man.
482
00:30:12,577 --> 00:30:14,711
Oh, geez!
483
00:30:14,779 --> 00:30:17,514
Talk about a tacky suit!
484
00:30:17,582 --> 00:30:19,583
-[Chuckles]
-Tacky, huh?
485
00:30:21,586 --> 00:30:24,454
Hey! Hey! What?
486
00:30:26,758 --> 00:30:29,927
-Now turn the other cheek.
-[Slapping Sound]
-Ow! Hey!
487
00:30:29,994 --> 00:30:33,630
-[Shudders, Exhales]
-Catch you later, Spanky.
488
00:30:35,466 --> 00:30:37,835
[Exhales]
489
00:30:37,902 --> 00:30:40,170
All right, I'm bustin' out!
490
00:30:40,238 --> 00:30:42,272
-There.
-Go ahead, try 'em all on.
491
00:30:42,340 --> 00:30:45,742
See if I care.
Whoa!
492
00:30:45,810 --> 00:30:49,413
If love is a crime, lock me up!
493
00:30:49,480 --> 00:30:53,517
I'm guilty.
Look at her.
494
00:30:53,585 --> 00:30:56,186
A perfect size six,
495
00:30:56,254 --> 00:30:59,857
and never been worn!
496
00:30:59,924 --> 00:31:04,228
Darling, don't speak.
Just come to me. [Chuckles]
497
00:31:04,295 --> 00:31:08,065
Oh, this is crazy.
I'm a polymorph, and you're a polyester.
498
00:31:08,132 --> 00:31:11,134
Yes, you're synthetic,
but I like that in a girl!
499
00:31:11,202 --> 00:31:13,871
Give me some thread, baby!
[Kissing Sounds]
500
00:31:13,938 --> 00:31:17,274
-Oh, what's this, Velcro? Ohh!
-Zoot!
501
00:31:17,342 --> 00:31:20,110
Ah! No, thank you, little girl,
I don't want to buy any cookies!
502
00:31:20,178 --> 00:31:23,547
You lecherous leotard!
Have you no shame?
503
00:31:23,615 --> 00:31:26,750
Look who's talking,
Mr. Clothes Horse!
504
00:31:26,818 --> 00:31:30,821
Now, in you go, or you'll take
a long walk on a short hanger.
505
00:31:30,889 --> 00:31:32,923
Coming in for a landing!
Flaps down!
506
00:31:32,991 --> 00:31:36,894
-[Flatulent Sound]
-I said bag it, mister!
507
00:31:36,961 --> 00:31:40,397
All right, all right, you don't
have to throw me in the hamper.
508
00:31:40,465 --> 00:31:43,967
[Grunting, Speaking Gibberish]
509
00:31:44,035 --> 00:31:46,236
Dork.
510
00:31:48,673 --> 00:31:51,608
-Next time, the dry cleaner.
-Bite these.
511
00:31:51,676 --> 00:31:54,645
[Gasps]
You-- Blasted nurplex!
512
00:31:54,712 --> 00:31:59,182
Oh, Venus, Neptune!
513
00:31:59,250 --> 00:32:01,818
-Help me, Tim!
-Mm-hmm.
514
00:32:01,886 --> 00:32:04,621
Tim, it's a little blue one!
515
00:32:04,689 --> 00:32:07,357
No!
Give me that,
516
00:32:07,425 --> 00:32:10,027
you age-impaired little blotz.
517
00:32:10,094 --> 00:32:12,129
Mine! Gum!
518
00:32:12,196 --> 00:32:15,499
-Mine! Nurplex!
-[Blows Raspberry]
519
00:32:15,566 --> 00:32:19,703
-[Roars]
-[Screams]
520
00:32:19,771 --> 00:32:23,373
[Screaming Continues]
521
00:32:23,441 --> 00:32:26,043
Why wouldn't you give
the kid a piece of gum?
522
00:32:26,110 --> 00:32:29,613
[Scoffs] Okay, sure, right.
Here, have one.
523
00:32:29,681 --> 00:32:31,949
-Come on, let's go. No, no, come on.
-What are you doing?
524
00:32:32,016 --> 00:32:34,184
-What are you doing?
-Trust me.
525
00:32:34,252 --> 00:32:36,119
-Not the finger! Don't do the finger!
-Try some.
526
00:32:36,187 --> 00:32:38,555
-Why?
-You don't want to try Martian gum?
527
00:32:38,623 --> 00:32:42,859
-No, not particularly.
-Afraid, Earthling?
528
00:32:49,901 --> 00:32:52,536
You know what, that is not bad.
529
00:32:52,603 --> 00:32:57,507
-The centre's got
a nice little zing to it.
-Notice anything different?
530
00:32:57,575 --> 00:33:00,377
Hmm, no.
No, not really.
531
00:33:00,445 --> 00:33:03,647
What time do you have?
532
00:33:03,715 --> 00:33:05,716
Aaaah!
533
00:33:05,783 --> 00:33:08,819
[Gasps]
Aaaah!
534
00:33:08,886 --> 00:33:12,055
-[Gasps]
-Spit, spit, spit.
535
00:33:12,123 --> 00:33:14,758
[Groaning]
536
00:33:14,826 --> 00:33:20,364
-[Groaning Continues]
-Everything okay in there?
537
00:33:20,431 --> 00:33:24,267
-Zipper trouble.
-Yeeow.
538
00:33:24,335 --> 00:33:26,937
[Breathing Heavily]
539
00:33:27,005 --> 00:33:30,240
This "gum", as you call,
allows me to take on the outward
appearance of a human being.
540
00:33:30,308 --> 00:33:32,342
On you, it has the reverse effect.
541
00:33:32,410 --> 00:33:35,445
Oh, so that's what you
really look like.
542
00:33:35,513 --> 00:33:38,548
Don't be disgusting.
That was Fluvian Nurplex.
543
00:33:38,616 --> 00:33:41,585
-Oh.
-We carry many different planets.
544
00:33:41,652 --> 00:33:46,723
If you think that was bad,
this is Veenox Seven.
545
00:33:46,791 --> 00:33:50,861
-Oh, well, that's--
-Don't ever mess with a Veenox Seven.
546
00:33:50,928 --> 00:33:54,698
When it comes to Veenox Seven,
just say no.
547
00:33:59,037 --> 00:34:01,071
Me man got fire
548
00:34:01,139 --> 00:34:03,907
Me so on fire
feeling hot, hot, hot
549
00:34:03,975 --> 00:34:06,810
All right, come on, the rest of you,
come on up on stage!
550
00:34:06,878 --> 00:34:10,313
The sun, while you can get it.
The sand, the surf.
551
00:34:10,381 --> 00:34:13,383
Usually, the beach conjures up
images of our youth,
552
00:34:13,451 --> 00:34:17,721
but come on down to Sunset Pier today,
and your contraceptions of--
553
00:34:17,789 --> 00:34:19,956
-Preconceptions!
-Contraceptions.
554
00:34:20,024 --> 00:34:21,892
-Preconceptions!
-Felix!
555
00:34:21,959 --> 00:34:24,327
I said preconceptions!
I swear, preconceptions!
556
00:34:24,395 --> 00:34:27,964
-Billy! Billy!
-Preconceptions!
I know I said preconceptions!
557
00:34:28,032 --> 00:34:31,134
I should listen to my parents
and be a doctor. I hate this!
558
00:34:31,202 --> 00:34:33,770
-Ooh!
-[Gasps]
559
00:34:33,838 --> 00:34:36,606
-Are we still rolling?
-Nobody said "cut."
560
00:34:36,674 --> 00:34:39,509
-Feeling hot, hot, hot
-What do you think?
561
00:34:39,577 --> 00:34:41,611
I think your bathing suit
should have a top.
562
00:34:41,679 --> 00:34:44,247
[Stammering]
Cut! Cut! Cut!
563
00:34:44,315 --> 00:34:47,851
-[Grunting]
-Felix!
564
00:34:47,919 --> 00:34:50,287
[Sighs]
Felix is toast.
565
00:34:50,354 --> 00:34:53,090
If Tim doesn't get here soon,
we could all be looking for work.
566
00:34:53,157 --> 00:34:58,528
[Chattering, Indistinct]
567
00:34:58,596 --> 00:35:02,265
Wait here.
568
00:35:02,333 --> 00:35:04,334
What is the meaning
of this divergence?
569
00:35:04,402 --> 00:35:07,370
-I gotta see some friends.
-Negative! Exclamation point.
570
00:35:07,438 --> 00:35:10,207
We're wasting valuable time.
My ship must--
571
00:35:10,274 --> 00:35:13,944
Look at that!
572
00:35:14,011 --> 00:35:16,179
Do you have any idea
how fortunate you are?
573
00:35:16,247 --> 00:35:19,382
The only water we get back on Mars
has to be squeezed from rocks.
574
00:35:19,450 --> 00:35:22,786
-Well, surf's up, dude.
-Tim, I'm so glad you came.
575
00:35:22,854 --> 00:35:25,489
-Hurricane Brace hit again.
-Oh, okay. Uh, Martin?
576
00:35:25,556 --> 00:35:27,858
-I gotta go. I'll be right--
-Lizzie!
577
00:35:27,925 --> 00:35:30,327
How nice to see you again.
578
00:35:30,394 --> 00:35:33,396
-Have we met?
-Of course!
579
00:35:33,464 --> 00:35:36,666
Not. How nice to see you again
for the first time.
580
00:35:36,734 --> 00:35:39,402
I'm Tim's Uncle Martin.
581
00:35:39,470 --> 00:35:44,608
-Oh, I--
-[Rumbling]
582
00:35:46,277 --> 00:35:48,812
-I, uh--
-[Rumbling Continues]
583
00:35:51,949 --> 00:35:56,052
-What was that?
-I must find nourishment.
584
00:35:56,120 --> 00:35:58,889
-That came from your stomach?
-Stomachs.
585
00:35:58,956 --> 00:36:02,225
Oh, he is-- [Chuckles]
He is such a kidder.
586
00:36:02,293 --> 00:36:04,561
Listen, I'll be with you
in couple minutes, okay?
587
00:36:04,629 --> 00:36:07,230
You just-- I'll be right over.
Tell her to--
588
00:36:07,298 --> 00:36:10,066
We gotta get you-- ah!
589
00:36:10,134 --> 00:36:13,170
[Stomach Rumbling]
590
00:36:14,438 --> 00:36:16,606
Excuse me, could I have
a double dip--
591
00:36:16,674 --> 00:36:19,109
actually, make that a triple dip,
chocolate chip, please.
592
00:36:19,177 --> 00:36:22,946
-Yes, sir.
-Tim, I need nourishment,
not coloured buckets of frozen lard.
593
00:36:23,014 --> 00:36:26,216
Look, this is very
nutritious food here on Earth.
We eat this for breakfast.
594
00:36:26,284 --> 00:36:29,853
Tim, you don't need to try poison
to know that it kills.
595
00:36:29,921 --> 00:36:33,023
Here, take this.
596
00:36:33,090 --> 00:36:35,725
Give me five minutes, okay?
I have to go to the news van.
597
00:36:35,793 --> 00:36:38,862
[Groans]
Blecch!
598
00:36:38,930 --> 00:36:42,432
-[Brace] Felix!
-I said "preconceptions", I swear!
Preconceptions!
599
00:36:42,500 --> 00:36:46,469
You unprofessional little man!
All you have to do is come up
with the dumb things I say!
600
00:36:46,537 --> 00:36:48,939
[Felix Groaning]
601
00:36:49,006 --> 00:36:54,077
-Billy!
-Brace! Brace!
602
00:36:54,145 --> 00:36:57,914
-You'd rate this tantrum?
-About a seven-five on the Brace scale.
603
00:36:57,982 --> 00:37:02,819
-I'll talk to Felix.
-You never told me about your uncle.
604
00:37:02,887 --> 00:37:05,488
Are you--
605
00:37:05,556 --> 00:37:09,426
Look, I'm glad you beeped me. We really
need to talk. This is really big.
606
00:37:09,493 --> 00:37:11,995
-I know.
-You do?
607
00:37:12,063 --> 00:37:14,464
Yes. Look, I've been thinking, and...
608
00:37:14,532 --> 00:37:18,401
our friendship really means a lot to me,
and I don't want to screw that up.
609
00:37:18,469 --> 00:37:20,770
-Okay.
-So I think it would be better...
610
00:37:20,838 --> 00:37:24,941
if we just pretended that nothing
ever happened between us last night.
611
00:37:25,009 --> 00:37:27,911
-What happened last night?
-Exactly!
612
00:37:27,979 --> 00:37:30,313
I'm not sure I understand what--
613
00:37:30,381 --> 00:37:32,482
Me either.
614
00:37:37,488 --> 00:37:40,724
I guess we're both a little confused,
huh, Tim?
615
00:37:44,762 --> 00:37:47,530
-[Gasps]
-Easy, easy.
616
00:37:47,598 --> 00:37:51,368
I thought you were her. She's terrible,
Tim. How did you last so long?
617
00:37:51,435 --> 00:37:53,470
She's a little high-maintenance,
but she's okay.
618
00:37:53,537 --> 00:37:58,308
-Oh, lust is blind.
-Do we still have that hidden camera
stuff somewhere?
619
00:37:58,376 --> 00:38:02,779
You're sitting on it.
Why?
620
00:38:02,847 --> 00:38:05,482
-Here, let me help you with this.
-Would you please?
621
00:38:05,549 --> 00:38:08,518
-These words are way too big.
-Huh? Humidity?
622
00:38:08,586 --> 00:38:11,221
-Hot.
-Oh, oh, oh, oh.
623
00:38:11,289 --> 00:38:13,623
[Announcer]
Wave for everybody!
624
00:38:13,691 --> 00:38:18,695
By God, if I were only 40 years older,
I'd be right there with 'em!
625
00:38:18,763 --> 00:38:21,331
[Muttering, Indistinct]
626
00:38:21,399 --> 00:38:23,400
-[Man] Miss Channing?
-Hmm?
627
00:38:23,467 --> 00:38:27,137
-Could I have a word with you, please?
-Okay.
628
00:38:29,073 --> 00:38:32,309
I've already signed it.
629
00:38:33,644 --> 00:38:36,012
Come on, who are you guys, huh?
630
00:38:36,080 --> 00:38:40,216
[Gasps, Muffled Screams]
631
00:38:47,925 --> 00:38:49,926
Okay, guys, you're all set.
632
00:38:49,994 --> 00:38:52,028
-Where's Brace?
-I don't know. She took off.
633
00:38:52,096 --> 00:38:54,564
She quit!
And her dad gonna blame me!
634
00:38:54,632 --> 00:38:56,900
Hey, what's going on
over there?
635
00:38:56,967 --> 00:39:00,870
-[Crowd Clamouring]
-Uh, Billy, put that in my car.
636
00:39:00,938 --> 00:39:03,173
-I gotta go.
-Call me!
637
00:39:03,240 --> 00:39:05,442
Martin!
638
00:39:09,914 --> 00:39:12,716
[Gulping]
639
00:39:12,783 --> 00:39:16,052
-[Gasps]
-[Martin Shouting]
640
00:39:16,120 --> 00:39:19,122
-I like it!
-Martin!
641
00:39:22,927 --> 00:39:27,197
Tim, you're here!
You've got to save me from myself!
642
00:39:27,264 --> 00:39:32,736
It's intoxicating.
Ooh, cookie dough!
643
00:39:32,803 --> 00:39:36,773
-I need to get you back to the home!
-[Gurgling]
644
00:39:36,841 --> 00:39:39,576
All they give him there is Jell-O.
There we go.
645
00:39:39,643 --> 00:39:43,747
[Muttering, Indistinct]
646
00:39:43,814 --> 00:39:46,216
Cookie dough!
647
00:39:46,283 --> 00:39:50,387
[Crowd Clamouring]
648
00:39:56,327 --> 00:40:00,497
[Beeps]
649
00:40:00,564 --> 00:40:03,066
Martian footage, take two.
650
00:40:05,503 --> 00:40:07,670
[Groaning]
651
00:40:08,706 --> 00:40:12,108
[Groaning Continues]
652
00:40:12,176 --> 00:40:14,744
-Chubby Hubby hangover, huh?
-[Groans]
653
00:40:14,812 --> 00:40:17,013
[Tools Clattering]
654
00:40:17,081 --> 00:40:19,816
I swear, I'll never
touch that stuff again.
655
00:40:19,884 --> 00:40:22,786
One scoop's too many,
and a million aren't enough!
656
00:40:22,853 --> 00:40:26,156
So, how's it coming, anyway?
657
00:40:26,223 --> 00:40:28,425
Oh, I converted a blow dryer,
two elastic bands...
658
00:40:28,492 --> 00:40:31,594
and an Acme Bug-Away insect bomb...
659
00:40:31,662 --> 00:40:33,663
into a temporary electron accelerator.
660
00:40:33,731 --> 00:40:36,166
-Is it working?
-Not at all, but on the positive side,
661
00:40:36,233 --> 00:40:38,301
your garage is now cockroach-free.
662
00:40:38,369 --> 00:40:41,037
Blasted rental!
663
00:40:41,105 --> 00:40:43,540
-This is a rental, is it?
-My regular ship is in the shop...
664
00:40:43,607 --> 00:40:46,176
for its mid-millennium tune-up.
665
00:40:46,243 --> 00:40:48,778
Where's your, uh, you know,
your suit, Zoot... thing.
666
00:40:48,846 --> 00:40:52,182
Oh ho, washing up.
667
00:40:52,249 --> 00:40:54,851
-Owwww! Spin me, mama!
-["I Feel Good"]
668
00:40:54,919 --> 00:40:57,720
So nice, so good
669
00:40:57,788 --> 00:41:00,156
Five more minutes, Zoot,
then into the dryer.
670
00:41:00,224 --> 00:41:03,493
You're bringing me down, man!
671
00:41:03,561 --> 00:41:07,964
[Groans] What I wouldn't give
to shed this grotesque human facade...
672
00:41:08,032 --> 00:41:12,035
and let the cool Earth waters
caress my Martian skin.
673
00:41:12,102 --> 00:41:15,472
-Oh!
-So why don't you?
674
00:41:15,539 --> 00:41:18,007
Why not, indeed?
675
00:41:18,075 --> 00:41:21,044
-["I Feel Good"]
-Move over, Zoot!
-Martin, I meant--
676
00:41:21,111 --> 00:41:24,147
I meant out in the hot tub, out back.
It would be private, by yourself.
677
00:41:24,215 --> 00:41:27,350
You mean spit out my Nurplex...
678
00:41:27,418 --> 00:41:29,886
and revert to Martian form
right outside your domicile?
679
00:41:29,954 --> 00:41:33,556
-Exactly.
-Oh, do you think that's safe?
680
00:41:33,624 --> 00:41:36,059
Oh, yes, of course it's safe.
681
00:41:36,126 --> 00:41:38,761
-I'll do it!
-Good. Let's go.
682
00:41:38,829 --> 00:41:40,830
Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy.
683
00:41:40,898 --> 00:41:43,199
-Tim? Thanks.
-Yeah?
684
00:41:43,267 --> 00:41:45,268
It's just a hot tub, Martin.
No big deal.
685
00:41:45,336 --> 00:41:47,370
I don't mean just that.
I know I must have...
686
00:41:47,438 --> 00:41:50,673
created complete havoc with your
simple life since the moment I arrived.
687
00:41:50,741 --> 00:41:54,310
Anyway, I just wanted to say...
thank you.
688
00:41:57,281 --> 00:41:59,082
[Whooping Excitedly]
689
00:41:59,149 --> 00:42:01,784
Hello!
690
00:42:01,852 --> 00:42:04,687
Hello!
Would somebody please...
691
00:42:04,755 --> 00:42:06,856
come and tell me
what's going on here?
692
00:42:09,693 --> 00:42:12,462
All right, Miss Channing.
693
00:42:13,497 --> 00:42:16,232
Do you know what this is?
694
00:42:16,300 --> 00:42:18,301
This has been
positively identified...
695
00:42:18,369 --> 00:42:20,904
by my team of experts
as your cigarette.
696
00:42:20,971 --> 00:42:24,874
It was discovered
at the site of a U.F.O. crash!
697
00:42:24,942 --> 00:42:27,744
-What?
-And on it are trace elements...
698
00:42:27,811 --> 00:42:31,814
of what we believe
to be alien DNA.
699
00:42:31,882 --> 00:42:35,718
-Alien?
-Oh, don't play dumb with me!
700
00:42:35,786 --> 00:42:38,755
You are an alien...
701
00:42:38,822 --> 00:42:41,724
inhabiting the body of a woman!
702
00:42:43,894 --> 00:42:47,297
A very, very attractive woman.
703
00:42:47,364 --> 00:42:49,299
Oh, please.
704
00:42:49,366 --> 00:42:52,235
Dr Coleye, we've run the tests
on the other cigarette.
705
00:42:52,303 --> 00:42:54,304
It's human DNA.
706
00:42:54,371 --> 00:42:57,607
Oh.
So sorry.
707
00:42:57,675 --> 00:43:02,312
An honest mistake.
So, Miss Channing,
708
00:43:02,379 --> 00:43:04,781
do you have any idea
how alien DNA...
709
00:43:04,848 --> 00:43:07,250
ended up on your cigarette?
710
00:43:07,318 --> 00:43:11,788
I might. First of all,
let's talk about what's in this for me.
711
00:43:11,855 --> 00:43:17,193
The safety of this entire planet
may depend on what you say to me.
712
00:43:17,261 --> 00:43:20,430
There's nothing in it for you!
713
00:43:20,497 --> 00:43:24,033
-[Frustrated Scream]
-Dr Coleye.
714
00:43:24,101 --> 00:43:27,670
May I call you... Doctor?
715
00:43:27,738 --> 00:43:30,673
Think about it.
When this story breaks,
716
00:43:30,741 --> 00:43:35,178
you will be the most
famous scientist in history.
717
00:43:35,245 --> 00:43:39,816
You will be on the cover
of Scientific... whatever.
718
00:43:39,883 --> 00:43:45,188
You will be the man
that proves that aliens exist.
719
00:43:45,255 --> 00:43:50,526
And I will be the woman
who tells the world your story.
720
00:43:52,529 --> 00:43:54,831
We'll do it together.
721
00:43:54,898 --> 00:43:57,834
Okay.
722
00:43:57,901 --> 00:44:04,073
-[Opera]
-[Singing Along]
723
00:44:19,823 --> 00:44:23,593
[Singing Opera]
724
00:44:27,264 --> 00:44:30,867
-Tim?
-[Gasps]
725
00:44:30,934 --> 00:44:33,102
What are you doing up there?
726
00:44:33,170 --> 00:44:35,705
[Whispering]
My Uncle Martin's in the hot tub,
727
00:44:35,773 --> 00:44:38,107
and I'm... watching.
728
00:44:39,343 --> 00:44:43,012
Oh.
729
00:44:44,248 --> 00:44:47,183
What a strange family.
730
00:44:47,251 --> 00:44:50,887
You can, uh--
You can sleep here.
731
00:44:50,954 --> 00:44:53,623
-You guys do sleep, don't you?
-Oh, most definitely.
732
00:44:53,691 --> 00:44:56,893
Oh, great.
We have something in common.
733
00:44:56,960 --> 00:44:59,062
You're very kind, Tim O'Hara.
734
00:44:59,129 --> 00:45:03,900
-No, just very tired.
-Ohh, enjoy your rest cycle.
735
00:45:03,967 --> 00:45:06,569
-[Electronic Buzz]
-I'll do the same.
736
00:45:06,637 --> 00:45:08,938
I could use a little shut-eye.
737
00:45:09,006 --> 00:45:11,441
-[Sighs] So could I.
-[Light Switch Clicks]
738
00:45:11,508 --> 00:45:14,143
[Yawns]
739
00:45:14,211 --> 00:45:16,913
-Rise and shine!
-Yeah, yeah right.
740
00:45:16,980 --> 00:45:18,981
What's on tap for today, Tim O'Hara?
741
00:45:19,049 --> 00:45:21,150
I feel like a million radix.
742
00:45:21,218 --> 00:45:23,453
Hey, it's still tonight.
You've been asleep for 30 seconds.
743
00:45:23,520 --> 00:45:27,090
Thirty seconds?
Wow, I really was tired.
744
00:45:27,157 --> 00:45:29,926
[Martin]
What are we waiting for?
745
00:45:29,993 --> 00:45:33,596
There's a whole metropolis out there
just waiting to be discovered!
746
00:45:33,664 --> 00:45:35,665
[Tim] No, not in the middle
of the night, there isn't.
747
00:45:35,733 --> 00:45:38,301
[Martin] I feel like ice cream,
and there's no time like the present.
748
00:45:38,368 --> 00:45:42,739
[Martin]
Hello? Why aren't they open?
749
00:45:42,806 --> 00:45:46,776
-What's wrong with this planet?
-I told you they don't open till 10:00.
750
00:45:46,844 --> 00:45:50,012
-I could be first in line.
-They aren't gonna let you in
when they do open,
751
00:45:50,080 --> 00:45:53,249
not after that little stunt
you pulled yesterday.
752
00:45:55,719 --> 00:45:57,754
[Electronic Buzz]
753
00:45:57,821 --> 00:46:02,325
-We call that breaking and entering.
-[Electronic Buzz]
754
00:46:02,392 --> 00:46:06,863
Ah, the smell of moist air.
755
00:46:06,930 --> 00:46:10,800
I'll never forget this.
Your ocean!
756
00:46:10,868 --> 00:46:13,603
Ice cream!
757
00:46:13,670 --> 00:46:16,038
This primitive planet
may not compare to Mars,
758
00:46:16,106 --> 00:46:18,341
but it's not the rotten rock
I thought it was.
759
00:46:18,408 --> 00:46:20,643
Don't look now,
but I think we're being followed.
760
00:46:20,711 --> 00:46:22,812
Impossible.
My acute sensory perception...
761
00:46:22,880 --> 00:46:24,881
would have detected that immediately.
762
00:46:24,948 --> 00:46:28,050
[Electronic Whirring]
Now it's working.
763
00:46:28,118 --> 00:46:30,052
Hey! Hey, buddy!
764
00:46:30,120 --> 00:46:32,388
-What are you doing?
-I've been discovered!
765
00:46:32,456 --> 00:46:34,657
-I'm doomed!
-No, no, no, just calm down.
766
00:46:34,725 --> 00:46:36,726
It's probably
just some tourist or something.
767
00:46:36,794 --> 00:46:40,329
Besides, even if you did get caught,
you'd probably be, you know, welcomed.
768
00:46:40,397 --> 00:46:43,132
Welcomed?
Tim, where do Earthlings put...
769
00:46:43,200 --> 00:46:46,235
their most beautiful
and rare animals?
770
00:46:46,303 --> 00:46:48,337
If I don't get that spaceship fixed,
I'm finished,
771
00:46:48,405 --> 00:46:50,473
just like Neenurt.
772
00:46:50,541 --> 00:46:53,242
[Zoot] Can you fix it?
'Cause I'm dyin' here.
773
00:46:53,310 --> 00:46:56,045
I need a drink, is what I need.
774
00:46:56,113 --> 00:46:58,181
[Humming]
775
00:46:58,248 --> 00:47:01,050
Yeah.
Downy the hatch.
776
00:47:01,118 --> 00:47:04,921
[Zoot Coughing]
777
00:47:04,988 --> 00:47:08,324
-What was that?
-What in blazes?
778
00:47:08,392 --> 00:47:11,227
-What is it?
-[Beeps]
779
00:47:11,295 --> 00:47:14,263
Oh, blotz!
780
00:47:14,331 --> 00:47:17,366
Zoot, an I.S.S.!
781
00:47:17,434 --> 00:47:19,769
[Screams]
782
00:47:19,837 --> 00:47:23,206
[Screams]
783
00:47:23,273 --> 00:47:25,274
[Tape Rewinding]
784
00:47:25,342 --> 00:47:28,945
-Blasted rental!
-[Tape Rewinding]
785
00:47:29,012 --> 00:47:32,882
-[Tape Rewinding]
-Owww! Spin me, mama!
786
00:47:32,950 --> 00:47:36,519
-So nice, so good
-[Tape Rewinding]
787
00:47:36,587 --> 00:47:42,592
-[Tape Playing At Fast Speed]
-[Opera]
788
00:47:42,659 --> 00:47:45,928
[Chuckles]
Uncle Martin, what are you--
789
00:47:52,436 --> 00:47:54,804
[Phone Ringing]
790
00:47:54,872 --> 00:47:57,039
-Tech department.
-[Tim] Hi, it's me.
791
00:47:57,107 --> 00:48:00,142
-Oh, hi.
-What are you doin'?
792
00:48:00,210 --> 00:48:02,879
Uh, research.
793
00:48:02,946 --> 00:48:06,415
Have you ever got into your head how--
how you felt about somebody,
794
00:48:06,483 --> 00:48:10,786
and then something they said or did
just suddenly changed your mind?
795
00:48:10,854 --> 00:48:13,489
Well, yeah, I--
796
00:48:13,557 --> 00:48:15,825
Could you come over?
797
00:48:15,893 --> 00:48:19,128
Please, I really need to see you.
It's important.
798
00:48:19,196 --> 00:48:22,565
Sure. Could you give me
like a half an hour?
799
00:48:22,633 --> 00:48:26,736
-[Sighs] You're the best, Lizzie.
-Okay, see ya!
800
00:48:26,803 --> 00:48:28,804
Oh, my gosh.
801
00:48:28,872 --> 00:48:32,675
[Exhales]
802
00:48:32,743 --> 00:48:34,777
[Martin Shouting]
803
00:48:34,845 --> 00:48:38,114
-[Shouts]
-Martin?
804
00:48:38,181 --> 00:48:40,783
-[Growling]
-I'm not like you.
805
00:48:40,851 --> 00:48:43,586
I need more than
twelve seconds of sleep.
806
00:48:43,654 --> 00:48:47,957
All I need is one lousy
electron accelerator...
807
00:48:48,025 --> 00:48:50,026
for a vortex generator.
808
00:48:50,093 --> 00:48:52,795
But can I build it?
No.
809
00:48:52,863 --> 00:48:55,798
You'll do it. You just gotta
give yourself a little time, that's all.
810
00:48:55,866 --> 00:48:59,468
Time! I have no time!
811
00:48:59,536 --> 00:49:01,604
I just discovered
that this blasted rental...
812
00:49:01,672 --> 00:49:04,106
is equipped with an I.S.S.!
813
00:49:04,174 --> 00:49:07,043
-Yeah, what's that?
-Interstellar Safety System.
814
00:49:07,110 --> 00:49:09,979
A detonation mechanism
designed to prevent...
815
00:49:10,047 --> 00:49:13,449
advanced technology
from falling into the wrong hands.
816
00:49:13,517 --> 00:49:17,019
It's timer activates automatically
at the point of a crash.
817
00:49:17,087 --> 00:49:19,689
Okay, wait,
I heard "detonation" somewhere in there.
818
00:49:19,756 --> 00:49:23,492
If I don't take off by 9:00 tonight,
you'll hear a lot more than that.
819
00:49:23,560 --> 00:49:27,630
-Uh, how much more?
-[Makes Explosion Sound]
820
00:49:27,698 --> 00:49:30,833
-Uh-huh.
-Lublick.
821
00:49:30,901 --> 00:49:36,038
-Uh, you b--
-[Gulping]
822
00:49:42,112 --> 00:49:44,747
[Belches]
Ahhh!
823
00:49:48,051 --> 00:49:52,088
I know you've done your best
to help me, but it's no use.
824
00:49:52,155 --> 00:49:55,591
[Gasps]
Oh, no.
825
00:49:55,659 --> 00:49:59,562
I'm sinking into
a Martian depression.
826
00:49:59,629 --> 00:50:02,098
Sinking? No, no sinking.
Come on, we gotta go fix this thing.
827
00:50:02,165 --> 00:50:04,333
I'm falling apart, Tim.
828
00:50:04,401 --> 00:50:06,402
Oh, no, you're not.
829
00:50:06,470 --> 00:50:09,772
-[Sobbing]
-Come on.
830
00:50:09,840 --> 00:50:13,175
-Yes you are.
-On Mars, when we get depressed,
831
00:50:13,243 --> 00:50:17,546
we literally fall apart!
832
00:50:17,614 --> 00:50:20,182
-[Screams]
-Okay, no problem.
833
00:50:20,250 --> 00:50:22,752
Don't move, don't make it
any worse than it already is.
834
00:50:22,819 --> 00:50:25,755
-What we're gonna do is
we're gonna put you back together.
-[Screams]
835
00:50:25,822 --> 00:50:28,891
Does it screw in?
It's not--
836
00:50:28,959 --> 00:50:33,396
-Okay, just---aaah! No!
-I wanna go home!
837
00:50:33,463 --> 00:50:35,965
-We're gonna put our heads together--
-[Gasps]
838
00:50:36,033 --> 00:50:38,534
-Aaaah!
-[Knock On Door]
839
00:50:38,602 --> 00:50:40,403
-Coming!
-Who's that?
840
00:50:40,470 --> 00:50:42,705
-It's Lizzie!
-Lizzie? Oh, no.
841
00:50:44,107 --> 00:50:46,108
You wait here.
842
00:50:46,176 --> 00:50:48,444
-Where are you going with those?
-Just tidying up!
843
00:50:48,512 --> 00:50:51,414
Give 'em back! Give me back my arms!
Give me back--
844
00:50:51,481 --> 00:50:54,450
Why do I have to die here?
[Groaning]
845
00:50:55,485 --> 00:50:57,453
Hello?
846
00:50:57,521 --> 00:50:59,922
-Yoo-hoo!
-Don't move.
847
00:50:59,990 --> 00:51:01,824
Tim!
848
00:51:01,892 --> 00:51:04,293
Does anything in this room
strike you as odd?
849
00:51:04,361 --> 00:51:06,395
-Tim?
-[Gasps]
850
00:51:06,463 --> 00:51:08,564
[Martin]
Just a minute!
851
00:51:08,632 --> 00:51:10,466
-Aaah!
-Would you just be quiet?
852
00:51:10,534 --> 00:51:13,803
Coming! Lizzie!
Oh, Br-Br-Brace!
853
00:51:13,870 --> 00:51:16,272
Tim!
Are you decent?
854
00:51:16,339 --> 00:51:20,076
Oh, yeah! Yes, I am.
[Stuttering] What a surprise!
855
00:51:20,143 --> 00:51:22,611
-Yes, now get lost!
-What did you say?
856
00:51:22,679 --> 00:51:25,981
Uh, I'm lost.
I mean, [Chuckles]
857
00:51:26,049 --> 00:51:28,150
I'm at a loss
for how beautiful you look.
858
00:51:30,253 --> 00:51:32,555
Hey, hey, hey, hey--
[Screams]
859
00:51:34,991 --> 00:51:37,259
Now, Tim, I hope you're gonna
let me make it up to you.
860
00:51:37,327 --> 00:51:39,462
Oh, no, you don't have to do that.
I mean, that--
861
00:51:39,529 --> 00:51:45,201
Well, you know, that's up to you.
I mean, if that's--
862
00:51:47,671 --> 00:51:50,172
I brought a little peace offering.
863
00:51:50,240 --> 00:51:52,374
-Where are your wine glasses?
-No, no, no--
864
00:51:52,442 --> 00:51:55,377
That's the bedroom.
No glasses up there.
865
00:51:55,445 --> 00:51:57,480
Oh, well,
maybe I'll get a little tour later.
866
00:51:57,547 --> 00:51:59,849
-[Martin] Don't miss the bathroom!
-I'm sorry?
867
00:51:59,916 --> 00:52:01,984
I have to go to the bathroom later.
Later.
868
00:52:02,052 --> 00:52:04,820
Um, glasses are in the kitchen.
869
00:52:04,888 --> 00:52:07,022
Why don't I go get them,
and you just...
870
00:52:07,090 --> 00:52:09,225
kind of make yourself at home.
871
00:52:09,292 --> 00:52:11,794
Okay.
872
00:52:13,864 --> 00:52:16,832
-Fantastic apartment, Tim.
-Thank you very much.
873
00:52:16,900 --> 00:52:19,135
-[Cork Pops]
-Ah, yeah, there we go.
874
00:52:19,202 --> 00:52:22,872
Oh! What a slob!
875
00:52:22,939 --> 00:52:28,043
[Humming]
876
00:52:29,312 --> 00:52:32,014
[Martin Grunting]
Cut it out!
877
00:52:32,082 --> 00:52:36,085
-Hey!
-Yes, let's fall in love
878
00:52:36,153 --> 00:52:38,254
-Ooh!
-Why shouldn't we
879
00:52:38,321 --> 00:52:41,657
-Fall in love
-Mmm, that's the spot.
880
00:52:41,725 --> 00:52:44,527
Let's take a chance
881
00:52:44,594 --> 00:52:48,664
-Ooh, yeah. Mmm.
-Why be afraid of it, ba-ba-doo-day
882
00:52:48,732 --> 00:52:51,100
-Let's close our eyes
-[Moaning]
883
00:52:51,168 --> 00:52:54,103
And make our own paradise
884
00:52:54,171 --> 00:52:59,275
-Little we know
-Oh, oh, no, harder, like before.
885
00:52:59,342 --> 00:53:02,444
-Ahhh.
-Oh, baby
886
00:53:02,512 --> 00:53:05,214
-Where's the wine?
-Uh, uh--
887
00:53:05,282 --> 00:53:09,118
Why shouldn't
we fall in love
888
00:53:09,186 --> 00:53:11,787
-I'll get it.
-Now is the time for it
While we are young
889
00:53:11,855 --> 00:53:14,523
Let's fall in love
890
00:53:14,591 --> 00:53:16,625
You know, I asked Daddy
about giving you another chance.
891
00:53:16,693 --> 00:53:18,961
Oh, oh, good!
892
00:53:21,765 --> 00:53:25,668
-Here we go.
-Oh, lovely. Thanks.
893
00:53:28,305 --> 00:53:31,240
Hmm. You know, I thought
that crash of yours...
894
00:53:31,308 --> 00:53:33,576
might make a kind of
cute little story.
895
00:53:33,643 --> 00:53:36,745
-Oh, really? Good. That's--
-Mm-hmm.
896
00:53:36,813 --> 00:53:38,881
[Grunts]
Ow, ow, ow, ow.
897
00:53:38,949 --> 00:53:41,617
Cut it out!
898
00:53:41,685 --> 00:53:43,919
-What was that?
-Uh, I didn't hear anything.
899
00:53:43,987 --> 00:53:47,423
Tim, get rid of--
[Groaning]
900
00:53:47,490 --> 00:53:49,825
Are you all right?
901
00:53:49,893 --> 00:53:53,429
Yes, I just--
I really have to go to the bathroom.
902
00:53:53,496 --> 00:53:58,100
-Well, hurry back.
-[Chuckles]
903
00:53:58,168 --> 00:54:01,337
-Why shouldn't we fall in love
-Be a minute.
904
00:54:01,404 --> 00:54:04,106
-Now's the time while we're young
-[Sighs]
905
00:54:04,174 --> 00:54:07,910
Tim!
Get me outta here!
906
00:54:07,978 --> 00:54:10,746
Stop making all that noise!
907
00:54:10,814 --> 00:54:13,816
Tell her to stop punching me!
Besides, what are you doing...
908
00:54:13,883 --> 00:54:15,918
letting that female
in your apartment?
909
00:54:15,986 --> 00:54:19,188
I've been waiting a long time
to get Brace Channing into my apartment.
910
00:54:19,256 --> 00:54:22,124
But you like Lizzie! I could tell
through your saliva exchange.
911
00:54:22,192 --> 00:54:24,960
-Excuse me?
-Look, Tim, the other night,
912
00:54:25,028 --> 00:54:27,096
when you were unconscious,
Lizzie came here.
913
00:54:27,163 --> 00:54:29,798
-And you what, you kissed her?
-Yes-- No, no--
914
00:54:29,866 --> 00:54:32,101
Well, you did.
915
00:54:32,168 --> 00:54:34,203
I did a molecular
identiclone of your body.
916
00:54:34,271 --> 00:54:36,805
-What? You what?
-You'd never understand.
917
00:54:36,873 --> 00:54:38,874
You people think E-mail is amazing.
918
00:54:38,942 --> 00:54:41,644
The point is, while I was you,
919
00:54:41,711 --> 00:54:44,113
I tapped into your subconscious,
and trust me, you like Lizzie.
920
00:54:44,180 --> 00:54:47,483
That's why I thought it was okay
for you to kiss her.
921
00:54:47,550 --> 00:54:49,918
I-I-I didn't kiss her, you did!
922
00:54:57,294 --> 00:55:00,562
[Gasps]
Bingo!
923
00:55:00,630 --> 00:55:05,801
Tim? I let myself
in the back door.
924
00:55:05,869 --> 00:55:08,704
Hello?
925
00:55:08,772 --> 00:55:13,008
-Oh, isn't this nice?
-Lizzie, is that you?
926
00:55:13,076 --> 00:55:16,745
Oh, you look, um, nice.
927
00:55:16,813 --> 00:55:19,181
He's in the bathroom,
928
00:55:19,249 --> 00:55:21,717
and he's all yours.
929
00:55:21,785 --> 00:55:24,053
I got what I came for.
930
00:55:28,191 --> 00:55:31,393
-Oh, this is great.
-Tim!
931
00:55:31,461 --> 00:55:34,697
-We don't have a lot of time here!
-I'm confused, all right?
932
00:55:34,764 --> 00:55:37,566
-Everything was going along fine
until you came along.
-Don't kid yourself.
933
00:55:37,634 --> 00:55:40,569
Even a substandard species
such as yours has feelings.
934
00:55:40,637 --> 00:55:44,773
Just slow down for one millisecond
and look into your heart.
935
00:55:44,841 --> 00:55:47,309
Whose face do you see?
936
00:55:54,150 --> 00:55:57,019
Look, Brace, I think--
Lizzie!
937
00:55:58,188 --> 00:56:01,290
Whoa!
Lizzie, no, wait, wait--
938
00:56:01,358 --> 00:56:04,560
-No, please!
-This better be good.
939
00:56:04,627 --> 00:56:06,328
Oh, it is. It is.
940
00:56:06,396 --> 00:56:09,231
Uh, remember that guy
I was with at the pier yesterday?
941
00:56:09,299 --> 00:56:12,468
-Your Uncle Martin.
-He's not my uncle.
942
00:56:12,535 --> 00:56:14,570
He's a Martian!
943
00:56:14,637 --> 00:56:16,505
-[Chuckles]
-Yeah.
944
00:56:16,573 --> 00:56:20,242
-You are such a jerk!
-No, no, no. He's a Martian!
945
00:56:20,310 --> 00:56:23,412
It's the truth. In fact,
he's the one who kissed you, not me.
946
00:56:23,480 --> 00:56:25,280
-Really?
-Yeah.
947
00:56:25,348 --> 00:56:27,850
His head's in my sink right now.
948
00:56:27,917 --> 00:56:30,819
-[Grunts]
-Get some sleep. You look awful.
949
00:56:30,887 --> 00:56:34,089
-Lizzie--
-And if there was anything kinky
on that videotape,
950
00:56:34,157 --> 00:56:37,693
you better get Brace to give it back.
951
00:56:41,898 --> 00:56:45,934
[Zoot Grunts] Fine!
Since when did I become a mechanic?
952
00:56:46,002 --> 00:56:49,671
-[Drill Whirring]
-Do I look like overalls?
953
00:56:52,942 --> 00:56:54,977
Uncle Martin!
954
00:56:55,044 --> 00:56:57,880
-[Scissors Snipping]
-[Zoot] Okay. Don't cut the red one.
955
00:56:57,947 --> 00:57:00,549
-Or was it the blue one? [Mumbling]
-Ooh!
956
00:57:00,617 --> 00:57:03,719
I can't see a thing down here!
957
00:57:03,787 --> 00:57:05,888
Oh, thanks.
958
00:57:08,925 --> 00:57:11,160
-[Electricity Zapping]
-Ow! Geez, that hurt!
959
00:57:11,227 --> 00:57:13,395
-[Screams]
-No!
-[Screams]
960
00:57:13,463 --> 00:57:15,998
Lady, please!
Put a sock in it! Quiet!
961
00:57:16,065 --> 00:57:18,066
The baby's sleeping!
962
00:57:18,134 --> 00:57:20,536
Martin, I told you.
We gotta get to the...
963
00:57:20,603 --> 00:57:22,638
TV station before Brace does.
964
00:57:22,705 --> 00:57:24,973
-[Martin] Open the bag!
-Okay, okay.
965
00:57:25,041 --> 00:57:27,342
-[Gasping] I can't breathe!
-I'm sorry.
966
00:57:27,410 --> 00:57:30,245
-Where is that confounded Zoot?
-Zoot? Uh--
967
00:57:30,313 --> 00:57:34,016
Zoot! Zoot! I think he's
in the middle of a spin cycle.
968
00:57:34,083 --> 00:57:37,920
Leave him! Quick, Tim!
Get my arm out of the other bag!
969
00:57:37,987 --> 00:57:40,522
-All right. Okay, okay, okay.
-Okay.
970
00:57:40,590 --> 00:57:44,026
-Okay.
-Yes! Excellent! Toward the ship!
971
00:57:44,093 --> 00:57:45,994
-Huh? What?
-Higher! Higher! Okay, here!
972
00:57:46,062 --> 00:57:48,931
Here we go!
[Grunts] Yes!
973
00:57:48,998 --> 00:57:51,600
-[Whimpering]
-[Martin] Easy. Oh, no!
974
00:57:51,668 --> 00:57:55,337
-[Screaming]
-Oh, no! Don't send me
to the shrink!
975
00:57:55,405 --> 00:57:57,206
-[Whimpering]
-Ohh!
976
00:57:57,273 --> 00:58:00,242
-What was that?
-Uh-oh.
977
00:58:02,245 --> 00:58:04,279
Sweetie-pie,
978
00:58:04,347 --> 00:58:06,415
this is the most amazing footage
I've ever seen.
979
00:58:06,483 --> 00:58:08,851
Felix!
O'Hara's tapes are going on the 6:00.
980
00:58:08,918 --> 00:58:11,053
-Van Gundy, call the network.
-Yeah?
981
00:58:11,120 --> 00:58:13,956
Brace is going out live
with the story of the century!
982
00:58:16,593 --> 00:58:18,627
[Martin]
I'm feeling a little carsick!
983
00:58:18,695 --> 00:58:20,729
-Oh!
-Sorry.
984
00:58:20,797 --> 00:58:23,432
[Martin Grunting]
985
00:58:23,500 --> 00:58:27,069
I can't take it any more.
I can't take it any more!
986
00:58:27,136 --> 00:58:31,206
-We're running out of time.
Try and pull yourself together.
-Why? We're all doomed anyway.
987
00:58:31,274 --> 00:58:34,810
Without my blasted electron accelerator,
the I.S.S. will blow!
988
00:58:34,878 --> 00:58:37,112
I feel like a hacksaw murderer.
989
00:58:37,180 --> 00:58:39,615
What the heck is
an electron accelerator anyway?
990
00:58:39,682 --> 00:58:42,751
It's a simple low-amperage power source
that activates the main thrusters.
991
00:58:42,819 --> 00:58:46,622
-Oh. Kind of like an alternator?
-What's an alternator?
992
00:58:46,689 --> 00:58:49,725
-It, uh, turns over the engine in a car.
-[Gasps] A car?
993
00:58:49,792 --> 00:58:52,461
That's it! That should work!
We're saved!
994
00:58:52,529 --> 00:58:54,563
-Not quite.
-Yes, we are.
995
00:58:54,631 --> 00:58:57,332
-Whoo-hoo! Ha, ha, ha.
-Listen, I've been--
996
00:58:57,400 --> 00:59:00,269
I've been videotaping you.
I've got everything. I got the ship.
997
00:59:00,336 --> 00:59:03,505
I got Zoot.
I even got you in your Martian form.
998
00:59:03,573 --> 00:59:06,308
I was putting together a story,
and I was gonna get it on the air,
999
00:59:06,376 --> 00:59:08,477
-but I couldn't do it.
-Why not?
1000
00:59:08,545 --> 00:59:10,279
Because I like you, Martin.
1001
00:59:10,346 --> 00:59:12,481
I like you. I--
1002
00:59:12,549 --> 00:59:14,516
And I'm sorry.
I-I just-- I'm sorry.
1003
00:59:14,584 --> 00:59:18,020
I I-- I apologize.
I shouldn't have lied to you.
1004
00:59:18,087 --> 00:59:20,923
-You're a good human, Tim O'Hara.
-Oh, oh, yeah. I'm a terrific--
1005
00:59:20,990 --> 00:59:23,091
Martin!
You're back!
1006
00:59:23,159 --> 00:59:25,360
And I like you too.
1007
00:59:25,428 --> 00:59:28,096
-Oh-ho!
-I've never had feelings before!
1008
00:59:28,164 --> 00:59:30,132
-Oh.
-[Chuckles]
1009
00:59:30,199 --> 00:59:33,201
Now, let's go fix my ship.
1010
00:59:33,269 --> 00:59:35,370
Yeah, okay-- No!
No, we got a problem-- the tapes.
1011
00:59:35,438 --> 00:59:38,974
-Brace goes on with the
Martian story in five minutes.
-Oh, blotz.
1012
00:59:39,042 --> 00:59:42,778
Yeah, and I got to get these tapes and
get to Brace before she gets on the air.
1013
00:59:42,845 --> 00:59:45,480
But there's not enough time.
You can't be in two places at once.
1014
00:59:45,548 --> 00:59:48,984
Yeah. Wait a minute!
Come on!
1015
00:59:49,052 --> 00:59:51,520
Is there an alien amongst us?
1016
00:59:51,588 --> 00:59:55,490
Is there an alien amongst us?
1017
00:59:55,558 --> 00:59:57,993
-Is there an alien among--
-[Knocking]
1018
00:59:58,061 --> 01:00:01,663
Billy, now what?
1019
01:00:01,731 --> 01:00:04,399
I want to be Brace Channing.
1020
01:00:04,467 --> 01:00:06,902
Yeah, well, get in line.
I'm sorry.
1021
01:00:06,970 --> 01:00:08,570
I really don't have time
to do any auto--
1022
01:00:10,206 --> 01:00:13,408
-[Gasps]
-Quaint, aren't they?
1023
01:00:13,476 --> 01:00:16,144
These days, most of our young
are born cable-ready.
1024
01:00:16,212 --> 01:00:18,180
You're the--
[Gasps]
1025
01:00:18,247 --> 01:00:21,450
[Gasps] Daddy!
[Screams]
1026
01:00:22,885 --> 01:00:24,820
[Director]
Heads up. Four minutes to air.
1027
01:00:24,887 --> 01:00:28,156
First positions, everyone.
1028
01:00:28,224 --> 01:00:32,094
Tim! What are you doing here?
You look, uh, tired.
1029
01:00:32,161 --> 01:00:35,364
Oh, yeah. I was up all night with Brace
working on the alien story.
1030
01:00:35,431 --> 01:00:38,900
I made a couple of mistakes
in tape number two,
but that's the corrected version.
1031
01:00:38,968 --> 01:00:43,705
Now if I could just get through this
without having to look in a mirror.
1032
01:00:43,773 --> 01:00:47,309
-Hmm.
-[Director]
Coming up on three minutes to air.
1033
01:00:50,179 --> 01:00:52,280
[Grunts]
1034
01:00:58,821 --> 01:01:00,922
Tim!
1035
01:01:00,990 --> 01:01:04,192
-Martin, is that you?
-Does a wild bear blotz in the woods?
1036
01:01:04,260 --> 01:01:08,196
Good, good. Okay. Just--
Just read the copy as written. Go.
1037
01:01:10,099 --> 01:01:12,100
-Hi, Brace.
-[Chuckling Nervously]
1038
01:01:12,168 --> 01:01:15,203
-Congratulations, Brace.
-Yes, I'm Brace Channing.
1039
01:01:15,271 --> 01:01:17,806
[Man]
Let's hear it for Brace!
1040
01:01:17,874 --> 01:01:21,376
[Whistling, Applauding]
1041
01:01:21,444 --> 01:01:25,414
-Dr Coleye, you're going
to become a very famous man.
-Thirty I.D. and open.
1042
01:01:25,481 --> 01:01:27,582
-[Announcer] KGSC.
-Ready camera one live.
1043
01:01:27,650 --> 01:01:29,785
-The news for southern California...
-[Grunting]
1044
01:01:29,852 --> 01:01:34,656
with anchor Howard Greenly and
on special assignment, Brace Channing.
1045
01:01:34,724 --> 01:01:37,159
-What the hell is she wearing?
-You know Brace.
1046
01:01:37,226 --> 01:01:41,229
-Yeah. Must be trendy.
-[Director] Fifteen seconds, people.
1047
01:01:41,297 --> 01:01:46,268
[Mr. Channing]
Sweetie-pie, get rid of the gum.
1048
01:01:46,335 --> 01:01:49,504
-Billy!
-Come on, Brace!
-Leave the gum, Billy!
1049
01:01:49,572 --> 01:01:53,075
-Get the gum, Billy!
-[Man] Brace, ten seconds.
-No.
1050
01:01:53,142 --> 01:01:55,277
Ready?
Camera two live in five--
1051
01:01:55,344 --> 01:01:56,945
-Give me the gum, Brace!
-No! No! No!
1052
01:01:57,013 --> 01:01:59,281
-Four--
-No!
-Leave it! Leave it!
1053
01:01:59,348 --> 01:02:01,950
-Three--
-Get the damn gum!
1054
01:02:02,018 --> 01:02:05,320
-[Roars]
-[Announcer]
Are there aliens amongst us?
1055
01:02:05,388 --> 01:02:07,823
This report is being broadcast live.
1056
01:02:07,890 --> 01:02:10,592
-The gum is out.
-Oh, good. Thanks to you, Felix.
1057
01:02:10,660 --> 01:02:14,529
[Announcer]
And now, Howard Greenly...
1058
01:02:14,597 --> 01:02:16,865
-And cue Howard.
-and Brace Channing!
1059
01:02:16,933 --> 01:02:19,267
-Good evening. I'm Howard Greenly.
-[Groaning]
1060
01:02:19,335 --> 01:02:22,003
-What's up with her?
-I don't know.
1061
01:02:22,071 --> 01:02:27,375
...a story developing throughout the day
right here in southern California.
1062
01:02:27,443 --> 01:02:32,147
Our own Brace Channing has been
following the events as they take place.
1063
01:02:32,215 --> 01:02:34,549
-Brace?
-[Groans]
1064
01:02:34,617 --> 01:02:37,052
-What is she doing?
-Howard--
1065
01:02:37,120 --> 01:02:39,187
-Camera two go.
-No!
1066
01:02:39,255 --> 01:02:41,890
[Greenly]
Brace?
1067
01:02:41,958 --> 01:02:44,159
-Brace!
-Just read the copy!
1068
01:02:44,227 --> 01:02:47,162
[Groans]
Just get the nurplex.
1069
01:02:47,230 --> 01:02:49,531
What's going on here?
1070
01:02:49,599 --> 01:02:51,633
Is there an alien amongst us?
1071
01:02:51,701 --> 01:02:54,636
-Oh. It's all right.
-According to Dr Elliot Coleye,
1072
01:02:54,704 --> 01:02:58,173
chief biologist and head researcher
for the SETI group,
1073
01:02:58,241 --> 01:03:00,575
the answer is--
1074
01:03:00,643 --> 01:03:03,411
-[Gasping]
-Yes.
1075
01:03:03,479 --> 01:03:06,982
-She's an alien!
-She's not an alien. She's my daughter!
1076
01:03:07,049 --> 01:03:09,417
[Voice Tonality Wavering] What you're
about to see is that evidence...
1077
01:03:09,485 --> 01:03:12,187
[Squawks]
of the actual footage of the alien.
1078
01:03:12,255 --> 01:03:14,823
But I warn you--
it's appearance is unlike...
1079
01:03:14,891 --> 01:03:17,526
[Gasps] anything you are
likely to have seen before.
1080
01:03:17,593 --> 01:03:20,762
She's going under the table.
She's going under the table!
1081
01:03:20,830 --> 01:03:23,665
-[Continues, Voice Wavering]
-And go.
1082
01:03:23,733 --> 01:03:27,035
-Feelin' hot, hot, hot
-What the hell is this?
1083
01:03:27,103 --> 01:03:30,505
-Somebody mislabelled the tapes!
-Come on. Got it!
1084
01:03:30,573 --> 01:03:33,074
-I don't know. Let's go back live.
-Tim!
1085
01:03:33,142 --> 01:03:35,510
What is O'Hara doing with my daughter?
1086
01:03:35,578 --> 01:03:38,446
-I-I-I don't know. I--
-Get me out of here!
1087
01:03:38,514 --> 01:03:40,949
-[Chattering]
-[Muffled Screaming]
1088
01:03:41,017 --> 01:03:43,852
-[Shouting]
-Get me the network!
1089
01:03:43,920 --> 01:03:46,388
-You're a dead man, O'Hara!
-Come on!
1090
01:03:46,455 --> 01:03:50,058
I think that went pretty well,
don't you?
1091
01:03:50,126 --> 01:03:52,761
-[Muffled Shouting]
-[Martin] All right. Calm down.
1092
01:03:52,829 --> 01:03:55,297
Search everywhere!
1093
01:03:55,364 --> 01:03:58,433
Boy, her head was dark and empty.
1094
01:03:58,501 --> 01:04:00,936
-There they are! There they are!
-[Muffled Shouting]
1095
01:04:01,003 --> 01:04:03,205
Wait!
1096
01:04:05,107 --> 01:04:08,076
I think Miss Channing might have been
contaminated by the alien.
1097
01:04:08,144 --> 01:04:11,112
-Hmm?
-I'm just going to give her
a quick examination.
1098
01:04:11,180 --> 01:04:13,381
[Muffled Shout]
No!
1099
01:04:13,449 --> 01:04:15,584
I'll just be a moment.
1100
01:04:15,651 --> 01:04:17,752
Ah.
There we go.
1101
01:04:17,820 --> 01:04:19,888
Let's see.
Am I forgetting something?
1102
01:04:19,956 --> 01:04:22,891
Oh.
[Humming]
1103
01:04:22,959 --> 01:04:25,760
There it is.
1104
01:04:25,828 --> 01:04:27,829
[Humming Resumes]
1105
01:04:27,897 --> 01:04:29,898
-Mrs. Brown! Down here!
-[Martin] Lady, please.
1106
01:04:29,966 --> 01:04:33,468
-[Both Shouting]
-Oh, this is darling.
1107
01:04:33,536 --> 01:04:35,937
-I'm gonna hurl!
-[Shouting]
1108
01:04:36,005 --> 01:04:39,507
This will make some child very happy...
if he's got a buck or two.
1109
01:04:45,381 --> 01:04:48,583
-Hey, Mrs. B. How are you?
-Hello, fellows.
1110
01:04:50,319 --> 01:04:53,688
Zoot!
Blotz!
1111
01:04:53,756 --> 01:04:55,957
My ship! Where's my ship?
1112
01:04:56,025 --> 01:04:58,627
-We only have two hours
before it explodes!
-I'll check upstairs.
1113
01:04:58,694 --> 01:05:00,762
Hurry!
Zoot!
1114
01:05:01,831 --> 01:05:03,965
Zoot?
Where are you?
1115
01:05:04,033 --> 01:05:07,202
Blotz! You're not Zoot.
Where could he be?
1116
01:05:07,270 --> 01:05:10,138
I'm not leaving this planet
without Zoot. Tim!
1117
01:05:10,206 --> 01:05:12,807
Not upstairs.
1118
01:05:12,875 --> 01:05:15,644
-What's a "rummaggie" sale?
-"Rummaggie" sale?
1119
01:05:15,711 --> 01:05:19,080
R-- Rummaggie--
Rummage. Mrs. Brown.
1120
01:05:24,420 --> 01:05:26,288
-[Tires Squealing]
-[Siren Wailing]
1121
01:05:26,355 --> 01:05:28,657
-Looks like we got company.
-Blotz!
1122
01:05:28,724 --> 01:05:32,160
It's them!
After them!
1123
01:05:32,228 --> 01:05:37,799
-[Sirens Wailing]
-Hang on.
-[Horns Honking]
1124
01:05:37,867 --> 01:05:40,068
-Ooh.
-I repeat, Gilford and Third.
1125
01:05:40,136 --> 01:05:44,306
Give me that thing.
I want a roadblock!
1126
01:05:44,373 --> 01:05:48,710
-We're never gonna lose 'em!
-Can't you drive any faster,
you pinhead?
1127
01:05:53,115 --> 01:05:55,250
-Uh-oh, we're in trouble.
-[Martin] Maximum thrust!
1128
01:05:55,318 --> 01:05:57,752
-What?
-Stand on it, Stan!
1129
01:05:59,155 --> 01:06:01,489
-We're gonna crash!
-[Triggers Cocking]
1130
01:06:01,557 --> 01:06:03,992
-I think not!
-[Device Beeps]
1131
01:06:04,060 --> 01:06:07,896
[Tires Squealing]
1132
01:06:07,964 --> 01:06:10,098
-[Tires Squealing]
-Aah!
1133
01:06:11,233 --> 01:06:13,768
-Oh!
-Shoot it! Come on!
1134
01:06:15,838 --> 01:06:18,239
-They're shooting at us!
-Duck in that garage.
1135
01:06:18,307 --> 01:06:20,842
-What garage?
-There!
-Hang on!
1136
01:06:22,144 --> 01:06:24,579
[Both Screaming]
1137
01:06:24,647 --> 01:06:27,816
Oh. Tim, why are we stopping?
1138
01:06:29,618 --> 01:06:32,721
-[Car Ignition Grinding]
-They're right there.
1139
01:06:32,788 --> 01:06:36,458
God!
1140
01:06:36,525 --> 01:06:39,861
-Get me that thing over there!
We're gonna flush 'em out!
-Yes, sir.
1141
01:06:39,929 --> 01:06:42,397
-I dropped it!
-What? Dropped what?
1142
01:06:42,465 --> 01:06:45,133
-My molecular compressor!
-Here.
1143
01:06:45,201 --> 01:06:47,369
Use this.
1144
01:06:47,436 --> 01:06:51,439
-This won't work!
-No, use it to find it.
1145
01:06:53,009 --> 01:06:56,244
That'll do very nicely.
Now, get it in there!
1146
01:06:56,312 --> 01:06:58,313
Uh! Uh!
Nuts!
1147
01:06:58,381 --> 01:07:00,415
Ahh! I found it!
1148
01:07:00,483 --> 01:07:02,717
[Coleye]
We've got you now!
1149
01:07:03,853 --> 01:07:06,054
-Tim!
-I see it!
1150
01:07:08,624 --> 01:07:11,326
-[Martin Groans]
-[Tim] Sorry.
1151
01:07:12,795 --> 01:07:16,398
[Shouting]
1152
01:07:20,970 --> 01:07:24,572
-Faster. Faster.
-It's getting closer!
1153
01:07:24,640 --> 01:07:28,276
-I'm going as fast as I can!
-That's not fast enough!
1154
01:07:28,344 --> 01:07:31,513
[Screaming]
1155
01:07:37,920 --> 01:07:41,723
Martin! Martin, up ahead!
We're trapped! Quick, make us smaller.
1156
01:07:46,095 --> 01:07:49,030
We're not gonna make it!
1157
01:07:49,098 --> 01:07:51,933
Hang on!
1158
01:07:55,104 --> 01:07:59,441
-Are we clear?
-[Martin] Whoa-ho, I think we did it!
1159
01:07:59,508 --> 01:08:02,310
-I see light ahead!
-Oh. Whoa, whoa-ooh!
1160
01:08:02,378 --> 01:08:05,213
[Both Screaming]
1161
01:08:15,691 --> 01:08:19,994
-Where the heck are we?
-[Man] Hey, Elma,
where's my new Field and Stream?
1162
01:08:20,062 --> 01:08:23,131
[Woman] It's in the bathroom,
right where you left it.
1163
01:08:23,199 --> 01:08:25,700
Oh, yeah.
I see it now.
1164
01:08:25,768 --> 01:08:28,670
By the way,
where's my tuna sandwich?
1165
01:08:28,737 --> 01:08:31,973
-You want it in there?
-Ha-ha. Ohh!
1166
01:08:32,041 --> 01:08:35,410
Why'd I eat that fourth burrito?
[Grunting]
1167
01:08:35,478 --> 01:08:38,580
-Uh-oh.
-[Grunting Continues]
1168
01:08:41,917 --> 01:08:44,886
[Flatulent Sounds]
1169
01:08:46,288 --> 01:08:50,091
-Do it. Do it now.
-[Device Beeping]
1170
01:08:50,159 --> 01:08:52,760
Uh! Uh, uh, uh--
[Screaming]
1171
01:09:02,505 --> 01:09:04,839
-Sorry, buddy.
-I'll get you, you son of a b--
1172
01:09:04,907 --> 01:09:08,743
-No!
-Sir, the police just had a crank call.
1173
01:09:08,811 --> 01:09:11,846
-A '62 Plymouth just came out
of a toilet on Woodlawn.
-Aah!
1174
01:09:15,484 --> 01:09:17,552
[Martin]
Stop! Pull over! Pull over!
1175
01:09:17,620 --> 01:09:19,621
We need to talk!
Pull over!
1176
01:09:19,688 --> 01:09:21,856
[Brakes Squealing]
1177
01:09:21,924 --> 01:09:23,925
-Pull over there.
-Where? Oh.
1178
01:09:23,993 --> 01:09:26,761
-Get the alternator. I'll get the ship!
-Okay.
1179
01:09:26,829 --> 01:09:31,132
Oh, my goodness! Martin!
What's wrong?
1180
01:09:31,200 --> 01:09:33,234
Forgive me, Lorelei,
but this is urgent.
1181
01:09:33,302 --> 01:09:35,737
-You have something I need desperately.
-Oh, wow.
1182
01:09:35,804 --> 01:09:39,240
-Martin, don't say that
unless you mean it.
-You don't know the half of it.
1183
01:09:39,308 --> 01:09:44,445
-I'm from another world.
-Oh, well, I could have told you that.
1184
01:09:50,519 --> 01:09:53,621
-[Grunts]
-Oh! Mmm!
1185
01:09:53,689 --> 01:09:56,491
Mar-- Martin?
1186
01:09:56,559 --> 01:09:58,960
Martin, come on!
1187
01:10:01,030 --> 01:10:03,631
When you look at the stars,
think of me.
1188
01:10:03,699 --> 01:10:06,401
-Oh. [Giggles]
-[Barks]
1189
01:10:06,468 --> 01:10:10,805
[Gasps]
Oh! Whew!
1190
01:10:10,873 --> 01:10:13,441
Feelings for an Earth woman--
I've gotta get off this planet.
1191
01:10:13,509 --> 01:10:15,510
I've got it!
1192
01:10:15,578 --> 01:10:18,012
I don't have the right tools,
so I'm having trouble getting--
1193
01:10:18,080 --> 01:10:21,749
Oh!
Or we could do it your way.
1194
01:10:21,817 --> 01:10:25,286
But wait! This means your vehicle
will cease to function.
1195
01:10:25,354 --> 01:10:27,989
I know how much it means to you.
1196
01:10:28,057 --> 01:10:31,492
Well, that's too bad.
Just had the darn thing washed too.
1197
01:10:38,500 --> 01:10:40,835
That's good!
That's--
1198
01:10:40,903 --> 01:10:43,004
Martin? Martin?
1199
01:10:45,407 --> 01:10:48,243
-[Coleye] Direct hit!
-Uncle Martin?
1200
01:11:00,422 --> 01:11:03,658
[Tim]
Hey! Hey, what--
1201
01:11:03,726 --> 01:11:07,328
Hey, you don't know what you're doing!
Hey, hey!
1202
01:11:07,396 --> 01:11:12,066
Don't mess with that spaceship!
It's gonna explode!
1203
01:11:12,134 --> 01:11:14,235
-Narrow the beam.
-Intensify.
1204
01:11:14,303 --> 01:11:17,138
[Lizzie Groaning]
1205
01:11:17,206 --> 01:11:19,841
I'm not flame-retardant!
1206
01:11:19,908 --> 01:11:22,977
We're in here!
Stop it!
1207
01:11:23,045 --> 01:11:25,046
-[Sobbing]
-We're gonna die.
1208
01:11:25,114 --> 01:11:29,183
-Die? And I'm still virgin wool!
-It's okay.
1209
01:11:29,251 --> 01:11:31,819
I'm scared! Hold me!
[Sobbing]
1210
01:11:31,887 --> 01:11:33,888
Oh, this is nice.
1211
01:11:33,956 --> 01:11:36,257
[Beeping]
1212
01:11:38,961 --> 01:11:43,531
[Coleye]
Easy does it.
1213
01:11:43,599 --> 01:11:46,501
Great.
1214
01:11:46,568 --> 01:11:50,872
-Wow. Fascinating.
-[Woman] Doctor.
1215
01:11:50,939 --> 01:11:53,374
It appears to be some sort of...
1216
01:11:53,442 --> 01:11:56,010
biomechanical transmitting device.
1217
01:11:56,078 --> 01:11:58,413
Doctor, there's some chewing gum
wedged back in his molar.
1218
01:11:58,480 --> 01:12:01,182
Leave it!
Pestering me with Juicy Fruit!
1219
01:12:01,250 --> 01:12:04,886
This guy's got a radio station
inside of his skull! Here.
1220
01:12:04,953 --> 01:12:08,523
We'll put this under the electron
microscope later. Whoa-ho!
1221
01:12:08,590 --> 01:12:12,260
Excellent.
Armitan's gonna be eating his words!
1222
01:12:12,328 --> 01:12:15,897
Perfect ending
to an already perfect day.
1223
01:12:15,964 --> 01:12:19,867
-He's a little pale.
-I think he's having a negative
reaction to the tranquilizers.
1224
01:12:19,935 --> 01:12:22,270
Well, two CCs of adrenaline, stat!
1225
01:12:22,338 --> 01:12:25,273
-Doctor, I think we're losing him.
-[Yelling, Pounding]
1226
01:12:25,341 --> 01:12:27,942
-Nothing.
-[Man] Shut it down.
1227
01:12:28,010 --> 01:12:31,813
-Get ready to try it again.
This time, full power.
-He's pointing to something.
1228
01:12:33,515 --> 01:12:35,883
-He's pointing to the thing.
-Pick it up. Pick--
1229
01:12:35,951 --> 01:12:38,119
Pick it-- Yeah.
No. No, no, no.
1230
01:12:38,187 --> 01:12:40,555
No, that one. That one.
1231
01:12:40,622 --> 01:12:43,624
Yeah, yeah. Yeah.
1232
01:12:43,692 --> 01:12:46,661
This. Do this.
1233
01:12:46,729 --> 01:12:51,165
-[Beeping]
-Yes!
1234
01:12:53,202 --> 01:12:56,137
[Shouting]
1235
01:12:59,475 --> 01:13:02,009
Whoa-oh-oh!
1236
01:13:05,147 --> 01:13:07,482
No. No, no. Oh.
1237
01:13:07,549 --> 01:13:09,751
-Tim!
-Oh!
1238
01:13:09,818 --> 01:13:12,253
All right, back off, Gomer.
Hey.
1239
01:13:12,321 --> 01:13:14,288
Give me that, dipstick!
1240
01:13:14,356 --> 01:13:16,357
You get Tim.
I'll scare the locals.
1241
01:13:16,425 --> 01:13:18,593
[Shouts]
1242
01:13:18,660 --> 01:13:20,528
-Let's get out of here!
-Call security!
1243
01:13:20,596 --> 01:13:23,030
-[All Shouting]
-Nobody will take on the suit!
1244
01:13:23,098 --> 01:13:25,600
My zipper is stuck,
and I'm mad as hell!
1245
01:13:25,667 --> 01:13:28,436
-Lizzie, what--
-Tim! Oh, are you okay?
1246
01:13:28,504 --> 01:13:30,872
-Fine, fine. Are you okay?
-Oh, you wouldn't believe--
1247
01:13:30,939 --> 01:13:34,976
-Yeah.
-[Beeping]
1248
01:13:35,043 --> 01:13:38,179
-We got to find Martin.
-Yeah.
1249
01:13:38,247 --> 01:13:41,215
Back off!
You heard me.
1250
01:13:41,283 --> 01:13:43,818
You don't understand. That spaceship's
gonna explode in 20 minutes.
1251
01:13:43,886 --> 01:13:46,587
-It is?
-On the floor. Now.
1252
01:13:48,023 --> 01:13:50,324
Excuse me.
Arnold, Jean-Claude?
1253
01:13:50,392 --> 01:13:53,895
[Shouts]
Not working. Oh.
1254
01:13:53,962 --> 01:13:56,664
-It's an empty suit.
-Empty suit?
1255
01:13:56,732 --> 01:13:59,901
Now you've done it, Grasshopper.
Whoo-aah!
1256
01:14:02,704 --> 01:14:05,473
Boxing?
[Chuckles]
1257
01:14:05,541 --> 01:14:07,675
-You should be boxing groceries.
-[Grunts]
1258
01:14:07,743 --> 01:14:10,211
[Laughs]
That tickles, ya big ox!
1259
01:14:10,279 --> 01:14:13,314
Say, aren't you
one of the Spice Girls?
1260
01:14:13,382 --> 01:14:16,083
-[Growling]
-Alley-oop!
1261
01:14:16,151 --> 01:14:17,885
[Crashes]
1262
01:14:17,953 --> 01:14:19,987
Beavis down, Butt-head to go.
1263
01:14:20,055 --> 01:14:23,491
So, is it true you peed your bunk
in summer camp? Ouch!
1264
01:14:23,559 --> 01:14:26,093
-[Screams]
-[Gasping]
1265
01:14:26,161 --> 01:14:30,064
Oh, Gee-- Tim! Lizzie!
1266
01:14:30,132 --> 01:14:32,900
-[Zoot Muttering]
-[Grunts]
1267
01:14:39,408 --> 01:14:41,909
-[Grunting]
-Ooh!
1268
01:14:41,977 --> 01:14:45,279
[Groaning]
1269
01:14:46,482 --> 01:14:48,382
-[Growls]
-[Screams]
1270
01:14:48,450 --> 01:14:50,685
-[Growling]
-[Groaning]
1271
01:14:52,654 --> 01:14:55,590
[Groaning Continues]
1272
01:14:56,758 --> 01:14:59,227
-Uh-oh.
-[Grunts]
1273
01:14:59,294 --> 01:15:01,429
-This is gonna hurt.
-Ooh!
1274
01:15:01,497 --> 01:15:04,298
-Ow!
-[Lizzie Gasps]
1275
01:15:04,366 --> 01:15:07,435
-[Blows Landing, Both Grunting]
-Lizzie!
1276
01:15:07,503 --> 01:15:09,403
The ship's going to explode!
1277
01:15:09,471 --> 01:15:12,039
Veenox Seven.
Chew this.
1278
01:15:12,107 --> 01:15:15,276
-[Punching Continues]
-[Tim] You gotta believe it!
1279
01:15:25,621 --> 01:15:28,389
Whoa-oh-oh-oh!
1280
01:15:28,457 --> 01:15:30,992
-[Growls]
-[Screaming]
1281
01:15:41,670 --> 01:15:45,039
-[Snarls, Roars]
-[Screams]
1282
01:16:00,989 --> 01:16:03,424
[Belches]
Uh-oh.
1283
01:16:03,492 --> 01:16:06,160
Did you do something with your hair?
1284
01:16:06,228 --> 01:16:10,164
Glad you noticed.
[Roars]
1285
01:16:17,339 --> 01:16:19,874
[Mutters]
Whoop!
1286
01:16:19,942 --> 01:16:22,043
[Sighs]
1287
01:16:25,180 --> 01:16:28,316
-I think I liked you
better the other way.
-Oh, really?
1288
01:16:28,383 --> 01:16:31,686
-[In Raspy Voice]
Well, that can be arranged.
-No, no. We gotta find Martin.
1289
01:16:31,753 --> 01:16:35,790
-Where's Zoot?
-[Moaning]
1290
01:16:35,857 --> 01:16:38,593
Oh, no.
1291
01:16:39,895 --> 01:16:42,396
Come on!
Come on!
1292
01:16:42,464 --> 01:16:45,199
Doctor, he's gone.
1293
01:16:45,267 --> 01:16:48,469
He's not gone till I say he's gone,
so back off!
1294
01:16:48,537 --> 01:16:51,205
-Back off! Now!
-[Nurse] Charge the paddle.
1295
01:16:51,273 --> 01:16:54,408
-[Man] All right, we're charged.
-[Coleye] Clear! Clear!
1296
01:16:54,476 --> 01:16:57,678
All right. Clear!
1297
01:16:57,746 --> 01:17:01,048
-Come on, Martin.
-[Electricity Buzzing]
1298
01:17:01,116 --> 01:17:03,250
-Oh, damn!
-There's no pulse, Doctor.
1299
01:17:03,318 --> 01:17:07,555
All right, all right.
I'm calling it. 8:15.
1300
01:17:07,623 --> 01:17:11,826
-We're too late.
-[Zoot] No, hurry!
1301
01:17:11,893 --> 01:17:15,329
-[Man] Would you like me
to do the autopsy, Doctor?
-Are you insane?
1302
01:17:15,397 --> 01:17:17,898
-You get out of here! Get out!
-All right. All right.
1303
01:17:17,966 --> 01:17:20,534
All of you idiots, you get out.
You get out.
1304
01:17:20,602 --> 01:17:23,237
-I'm goin'!
-You get right out. Clowns!
1305
01:17:23,305 --> 01:17:25,406
Come on.
1306
01:17:25,474 --> 01:17:30,511
Okay, my sorry little Martian.
1307
01:17:30,579 --> 01:17:33,681
Have it your way.
1308
01:17:33,749 --> 01:17:36,550
Let's open you up.
1309
01:17:36,618 --> 01:17:40,955
-[Lizzie] Assistance, Doctor?
-What? No! You--
1310
01:17:41,023 --> 01:17:43,524
Hey, wait a minute.
You're not--
1311
01:17:43,592 --> 01:17:46,193
-She came with me.
-Oh.
-Clear.
1312
01:17:46,261 --> 01:17:48,929
[Electricity Zapping]
1313
01:17:48,997 --> 01:17:51,766
[Moans]
1314
01:17:56,338 --> 01:17:59,373
[Zoot's Voice]
Must... be together.
1315
01:18:19,227 --> 01:18:21,062
Zoot!
1316
01:18:33,375 --> 01:18:35,910
-[Gasps]
-Martin?
1317
01:18:38,647 --> 01:18:42,349
-Martin!
-[Groans] Tim! Lizzie!
1318
01:18:42,417 --> 01:18:45,252
-You're-- You're--
-[Zoot] Breathin', baby!
I still got the touch.
1319
01:18:45,320 --> 01:18:48,089
Oh, you beauteous bathrobe!
[Laughs]
1320
01:18:48,156 --> 01:18:50,291
-Martin--
-Let's see cotton do that, huh? Easy.
1321
01:18:50,358 --> 01:18:53,294
-I got an image!
-[Martin] Okay, okay.
1322
01:18:53,361 --> 01:18:55,362
Martin! Martin!
1323
01:18:55,430 --> 01:18:58,499
-We don't have much time.
-Blotz!
1324
01:18:58,567 --> 01:19:01,268
-[Man, Over Loudspeaker]
Shut down and monitor all exits.
-[Sirens Wailing]
1325
01:19:01,336 --> 01:19:03,604
[Men Chattering, Indistinct]
1326
01:19:03,672 --> 01:19:06,607
[Woman, Over Loudspeaker]
All units stand by for total lockup.
1327
01:19:08,376 --> 01:19:10,611
-Martin, can you get the lock?
-I think so.
1328
01:19:12,047 --> 01:19:14,415
-[Electricity Humming]
-Come on!
1329
01:19:16,351 --> 01:19:19,286
-[Man, Over Loudspeaker]
Biotech units on alert.
-[Siren Wailing]
1330
01:19:19,354 --> 01:19:22,323
[Woman, Over Loudspeaker]
All non-security personnel...
1331
01:19:22,390 --> 01:19:25,359
-are to report to their holding areas.
-Come on. Stay down!
1332
01:19:25,427 --> 01:19:29,130
-Stay down.
-Here's a place!
1333
01:19:29,197 --> 01:19:31,398
All right.
Stand back, you two.
1334
01:19:31,466 --> 01:19:33,567
[Device Beeping]
1335
01:19:41,209 --> 01:19:44,145
-[Siren Wailing]
-What's going on? Where's the alien?
1336
01:19:44,212 --> 01:19:47,314
-There's been a slight problem.
-Open that gate. Let's find Dr Coleye.
1337
01:19:47,382 --> 01:19:49,250
-Yes, sir, yes, sir. Right away.
-Come on!
1338
01:19:49,317 --> 01:19:51,252
Let 'em through!
1339
01:19:52,487 --> 01:19:54,655
Here.
1340
01:19:57,225 --> 01:20:00,094
There. [Grunts]
Contact.
1341
01:20:00,162 --> 01:20:02,997
There.
I think that's going to work.
1342
01:20:04,633 --> 01:20:06,667
I'm gonna miss you, Martin.
1343
01:20:06,735 --> 01:20:10,871
-[Zoot Giggles]
-You too, Zoot.
-You're so full of starch!
1344
01:20:10,939 --> 01:20:13,574
Hey, let 'em know how you feel!
[Chuckles]
1345
01:20:13,642 --> 01:20:15,676
You're the best pet I ever had!
1346
01:20:15,744 --> 01:20:18,012
Stop being such a baby blanket!
1347
01:20:18,079 --> 01:20:20,948
[Mutters]
1348
01:20:21,016 --> 01:20:23,617
Lizzie, my dear friend.
1349
01:20:24,653 --> 01:20:27,788
Take care, Uncle Martin.
1350
01:20:30,125 --> 01:20:34,628
I've done that before. It's very nice.
I highly recommend it.
1351
01:20:37,132 --> 01:20:40,467
Good luck, you two.
1352
01:20:44,806 --> 01:20:47,908
Something tells me
you're gonna miss your flight!
1353
01:20:47,976 --> 01:20:51,111
-Then in two minutes, we all die.
-You're lying.
1354
01:20:51,179 --> 01:20:54,949
Are you certain about that, Coleye?
1355
01:20:55,016 --> 01:20:57,985
-Because I'm not.
-What are you saying?
1356
01:20:58,053 --> 01:21:01,288
-Release him.
-Release him?
1357
01:21:01,356 --> 01:21:04,992
I have spent an entire career
trying to prove that aliens exist.
1358
01:21:05,060 --> 01:21:08,395
Now he's my proof!
1359
01:21:08,463 --> 01:21:10,564
Dead or alive,
he's staying with me!
1360
01:21:10,632 --> 01:21:12,433
Oh. Ohh! Ohh!
1361
01:21:12,500 --> 01:21:14,935
Whoa! Aah!
1362
01:21:15,003 --> 01:21:18,439
-Martin?
-I don't understand! I-- I--
1363
01:21:18,506 --> 01:21:22,142
Coleye, you always were a little blotz.
1364
01:21:22,210 --> 01:21:25,646
-[Coleye] What?
-Neenurt!
1365
01:21:25,714 --> 01:21:29,416
Ha ha ha! I haven't heard that name
in a long time.
1366
01:21:29,484 --> 01:21:33,854
-Pronounced properly, anyway.
-You mean it was you all along?
1367
01:21:33,922 --> 01:21:39,159
I can't believe this!
I should have known! You're a Martian?
1368
01:21:39,227 --> 01:21:41,295
I was--
Uhh! Aah!
1369
01:21:41,363 --> 01:21:44,164
[Screaming]
1370
01:21:51,072 --> 01:21:54,675
Waaah!
[Grunting]
1371
01:21:54,743 --> 01:21:58,545
-[Chuckling]
-Wait. You're the one I saw at the pier.
1372
01:21:58,613 --> 01:22:00,281
I was trying to get to you
before they did.
1373
01:22:00,348 --> 01:22:03,317
I've been trying
to hitch a ride home for 30 years!
1374
01:22:03,385 --> 01:22:06,820
What a beauty!
Oh, by the way,
1375
01:22:06,888 --> 01:22:09,223
I believe these belong to you.
1376
01:22:09,291 --> 01:22:12,126
[Gasps]
My antennae.
1377
01:22:12,193 --> 01:22:15,663
I can't go home without these. I have a
hard enough time getting dates as it is.
1378
01:22:15,730 --> 01:22:19,700
Mine's always giving me trouble too.
And everything's in black and white.
1379
01:22:19,768 --> 01:22:23,137
-[Groaning]
-And those commercials--
"Plop, plop, fizz, fizz"--
1380
01:22:23,204 --> 01:22:26,740
That gum lost its flavour in '66.
1381
01:22:26,808 --> 01:22:29,710
All right. Let's go.
Let's go. Come on.
1382
01:22:29,778 --> 01:22:32,913
-Got to go. Farewell.
-Come back for a visit sometime.
1383
01:22:32,981 --> 01:22:35,649
Maybe.
1384
01:22:35,717 --> 01:22:38,719
I'm beginning to see a glimmer
of potential among you Earthlings.
1385
01:22:38,787 --> 01:22:42,656
One word of advice: You'll never
completely advance as a culture...
1386
01:22:42,724 --> 01:22:46,560
until you take care of your oceans
and do away with daytime talk shows.
1387
01:22:48,897 --> 01:22:51,198
Goodbye, you crazy lovebirds!
1388
01:22:51,266 --> 01:22:54,068
Ah, stop being such
a hysterical housecoat.
1389
01:22:54,135 --> 01:22:59,573
-See ya, Zoot.
-Rollin', rollin', rollin'
Keep them doggies rollin'
1390
01:23:01,109 --> 01:23:04,611
[Growling]
Aliens!
1391
01:23:07,983 --> 01:23:11,285
Wait! No!
1392
01:23:11,353 --> 01:23:13,554
Please! No! You can't!
1393
01:23:13,621 --> 01:23:16,457
Don't go! Come back!
1394
01:23:16,524 --> 01:23:20,194
No-o-o!
1395
01:23:20,261 --> 01:23:22,896
[Growls]
1396
01:23:22,964 --> 01:23:24,264
Aah!
1397
01:23:24,332 --> 01:23:26,633
What the--
Eeew!
1398
01:23:26,701 --> 01:23:30,204
Gum. Gum!
1399
01:23:30,271 --> 01:23:33,574
Wait, this is the alien gum!
Yes!
1400
01:23:33,641 --> 01:23:35,876
Wait, wait.
I wouldn't do that if I were you.
1401
01:23:35,944 --> 01:23:39,179
Well, you're not me, are ya?
[Laughs]
1402
01:23:40,949 --> 01:23:42,983
I can learn more about them...
1403
01:23:43,051 --> 01:23:45,285
from their leftover--
1404
01:23:45,353 --> 01:23:47,488
Wha--
That's brilliant!
1405
01:23:47,555 --> 01:23:50,124
I can feel every molecule of my body...
1406
01:23:50,191 --> 01:23:52,292
starting to change!
1407
01:23:52,360 --> 01:23:55,496
[Laughing]
1408
01:23:56,965 --> 01:23:59,033
Aah!
1409
01:24:00,068 --> 01:24:02,503
Oh, no.
1410
01:24:06,508 --> 01:24:09,009
Hold it! Don't move!
1411
01:24:09,077 --> 01:24:12,413
-No!
-Stop! Don't shoot!
Get the tranquillizer gun.
1412
01:24:12,480 --> 01:24:14,982
No, not that, you idiots!
1413
01:24:15,050 --> 01:24:18,485
-I'm not a Martian.
-We got him, boys.
Get the tranquillizer gun.
1414
01:24:18,553 --> 01:24:20,788
We've got one--
a real live Martian!
1415
01:24:20,855 --> 01:24:24,992
It's me. Coleye. No! No!
1416
01:24:25,060 --> 01:24:27,361
Aah!
1417
01:24:27,429 --> 01:24:30,197
[Man]
The truth is out there!
1418
01:24:30,265 --> 01:24:33,834
We are not leaving until they
listen to us! We've got proof!
1419
01:24:33,902 --> 01:24:37,104
I saw one!
He cloned my body!
1420
01:24:37,172 --> 01:24:39,106
He could be anywhere by now!
1421
01:24:39,174 --> 01:24:41,608
The truth is out there!
1422
01:24:41,676 --> 01:24:43,677
The truth is out there!
1423
01:24:43,745 --> 01:24:47,147
So that's the story here
from Santa Barbara City Hall.
1424
01:24:47,215 --> 01:24:50,284
-I'm Bill Randall, KGSC.
-[Crowd Chanting]
The truth, the truth,
1425
01:24:50,351 --> 01:24:53,053
the truth, the truth, the truth!
1426
01:24:53,121 --> 01:24:55,289
It's all I--
1427
01:24:59,060 --> 01:25:03,730
-Hey, sleepy. Brought you some tea.
-[Chuckles]
1428
01:25:06,801 --> 01:25:11,338
Listen, I've been thinking. Now that
I really know what happened between us,
1429
01:25:11,406 --> 01:25:14,641
I think maybe we should just go back
to the way things used to be.
1430
01:25:14,709 --> 01:25:18,312
-Mmm.
-Our friendship really does
mean a lot to me.
1431
01:25:18,379 --> 01:25:21,915
Yeah, well, I've been thinking too,
and, uh,
1432
01:25:21,983 --> 01:25:24,318
I think I've got enough friends.
1433
01:25:29,724 --> 01:25:31,792
[Whooshing Sound]
1434
01:25:48,409 --> 01:25:50,744
[Rattling]
1435
01:25:50,812 --> 01:25:55,616
-[Hissing]
-One giant leap for man,
one step backward for Martians.
1436
01:25:55,683 --> 01:25:59,019
-Zoot?
-Hey, Tim, Lizzie! We're back!
1437
01:25:59,087 --> 01:26:02,856
-[Chuckles]
-Zoot-- [Grunts]
1438
01:26:02,924 --> 01:26:06,126
Oh! Geez!
Call a skycap, for cryin' out loud.
1439
01:26:06,194 --> 01:26:08,395
-What's wrong?
-Nothing.
1440
01:26:08,463 --> 01:26:11,698
We've decided to stay here with you.
1441
01:26:11,766 --> 01:26:15,636
-Y-You what?
-I kept thinking how lonely
I was gonna be without you.
1442
01:26:15,703 --> 01:26:17,871
And since you said
you were gonna miss me,
1443
01:26:17,939 --> 01:26:21,441
I thought I'd save us both
the heartache of separation.
1444
01:26:21,509 --> 01:26:23,610
Ya-hah! Whoo-hoo-hoo!
1445
01:26:23,678 --> 01:26:28,482
B-B-B-But, Martin, I can't miss you
if you don't go!
1446
01:26:28,550 --> 01:26:32,085
Exactly!
Isn't it wonderful?
1447
01:26:32,153 --> 01:26:35,556
Farewell, Neenurt!
1448
01:26:35,623 --> 01:26:38,125
Wait a minute, wait a minute.
Where's he going?
1449
01:26:38,193 --> 01:26:40,894
To Mars, of course!
1450
01:26:40,962 --> 01:26:44,364
[Whooshing]
1451
01:26:45,733 --> 01:26:48,635
-Whoo! [Chuckling]
-Wh--
1452
01:26:48,703 --> 01:26:51,338
Martin. Martin.
What are you doing?
1453
01:26:51,406 --> 01:26:54,975
Tim, since we'll be living together,
let's do something about this furniture.
1454
01:26:55,043 --> 01:26:57,678
-Living together? What do you mean--
-I say we get rid of this couch,
1455
01:26:57,745 --> 01:27:01,248
and buy a hyperbolic resting chamber
like normal beings have.
1456
01:27:01,316 --> 01:27:04,017
-No! No! You're not staying here.
-Hey, who wants ice cream?
1457
01:27:04,085 --> 01:27:07,087
-[Chuckles]
-Tonight I'm craving praline swirl.
1458
01:27:07,155 --> 01:27:09,289
-Martin-- You think this is funny?
-[Chuckling]
1459
01:27:09,357 --> 01:27:11,291
You haven't seen him eat ice cream.
It's not pretty!
1460
01:27:11,359 --> 01:27:14,995
Rocky road! Rocky road! Rocky road!
[Shouts]
1461
01:27:15,063 --> 01:27:17,197
-Martin, you can't-- He doesn't sleep.
-[Shouting Continues]
1462
01:27:17,265 --> 01:27:19,533
He doesn't let me sleep.
This can't happen.
1463
01:27:19,601 --> 01:27:21,635
I can't have a Martian for a roommate.
1464
01:27:21,703 --> 01:27:24,104
I can't. I just--
1465
01:27:24,172 --> 01:27:26,340
-Oh, maybe I can.
-[Chuckles]
1466
01:27:26,407 --> 01:27:31,178
Zoot! We've got cookie dough.
Want some?
1467
01:27:31,246 --> 01:27:33,547
Zoot.
Zoot, where are you?
1468
01:27:33,615 --> 01:27:37,818
Bartender, a Mai "Tide", please.
1469
01:27:37,885 --> 01:27:41,021
Ah, Victoria's Secret.
1470
01:27:41,089 --> 01:27:44,491
You people know how to live!
1471
01:27:44,559 --> 01:27:47,094
[Chuckles]
Lycra.115201
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