All language subtitles for Ally.McBeal.S05E21.2001.Disney+.WEB-DL.1080p.H264.AAC-HDCTV_track6_[eng]

ALLY:
I'm not sure how it all started

Hey! I quit!

This is perfect. I just started
my own practice.

-You will join us today!
-I'm married.

-Bygones.
-Bygones?

-Snappish.
-Chinese wattle.

-Bitch.
-Man.

Bite my head off.

-(together) Objection!
-(screams)

-Dink!
-Hit me.

(groans)

Anything can happen around here, Ally.

You keep forgetting we don't live
in a real world.

♪ Even now ♪♪

(screaming)

-(screaming)
-(screaming)

-(groaning)
-Oh, balls. Move on.

Who the hell is SpongeBob?

Res ipsa de facto.
Quid pro quo. E pluribus penis.

Sex.

Sex, sex, sex, sex, sex!

-Do my knee.
-I'm pregnant.

-She has a--
-(all) Penis! Penis! Penis!

♪ My first, my last ♪

-You're a wacko!
-Your plumbing's old.

-You're fired.
-I'm done!

-Do you know what you're doing?
-I do.

(yelling)

-Hello!
-I'm your daughter.

A serial dater?

That's what I've become.
I've gone out with every guy in Boston.

And not one of them
worked out?

Besides Larry?

Well, except Greg,
until Renee stole him away.

Your roommate
stole your boyfriend?

Well, sort of. They-They sang
a song together.

-They sang a song?
-(beeping)

Come on.
(groans)

Huh.
100.2.

You know, I wonder
if you do have strep,

and that's why this
just seems to recur.

Huh. All right.
Up to bed we go.

Mmm. Do you, uh--
Do you still feel nauseous?

-Not as much.
-Oh, wait.

Let me get the Motrin.

Uh-oh.

Maddie?

I don't feel so--

Maddie! Oh, my--
Maddie?

Oh!

♪ I've been down
down, down ♪

♪ I've been down this road ♪

♪ Walkin' the line
that's painted by pride ♪

♪ And I have made mistakes
in my life ♪

♪ That I just can't hide ♪

♪ Oh, I believe I am ready ♪

♪ For what love has to bring
Yeah ♪

♪ I got myself together, yeah ♪

♪ Now I'm ready to sing ♪

♪ I've been searching
my soul tonight ♪

♪ I know there's
so much more to life ♪

♪ Now I know
I can shine a light ♪

♪ To find my way back home ♪

-♪ Oh ♪
-♪ Hoo, hoo ♪

♪ Baby, yeah ♪

-♪ Hoo, hoo ♪
-♪ Oh, yeah ♪♪

I'm fine.
This is so embarrassing.

Honey, just-just-just try
to stay calm, okay?

Ally, I'm calm. You're the one who called
the fire department.

Well, everything seems perfectly normal.
She's not running a fever.

-Well, then why did she faint?
-Well, um--

Either she's had some sort
of panic attack, or--

-Or-Or what?
-She's pregnant.

Did you hear me?

Hello?

All right. Everybody, uh, here?
Uh, seats, please.

-I-I have an announcement.
-Oh, don't tell me.

You're changing the name
to Fish, McBeal and Bump.

Oh. That hurts
my feelings, Morgan.

I apologize, Debbie.

Uh, n-never mind. Actually, Nelle,
uh, you're close.

Uh--Well,
I'm just gonna... say it.

I'm taking Liza
for my first wife.

And I'm taking Richard
for my very first husband.

We're getting married.
(chuckling)

-You've got to be kidding.
-Well, we're in love now.

-Why not commit for now?
-Oh, wait, wait, wait.

Just-- (exhales sharply)
one second.

Now, you-you two
are getting married?

Well, you know what
they say, Ally.

After the age of 30, you have a better
chance of being struck by lightning.

(all growling)

Now, uh, the date is June 8,
so save the day and night.

Uh, big party. Gaudy.
(both chuckle)

-This June?
-What's the rush?

We thought it best to do it
while we're still in love.

-It'll be funner.
-So what are you two? Like, nuts?

RICHARD: Look, obviously, a lot of you
have doubts, and I can understand that.

-But the truth is, and studies prove it,
-(elevator bell dings)

most couples' sexual passions begin to
wane before they actually marry.

Liza and I want to be husband and wife
for the sexual peak years.

Is it a gamble? Of course.
But what is love if not a risk?

And should it fail
for some reason--

(together)
Bygones.

-Divorce-a-rooni! (chuckles)
-(chuckles)

She's being
socially battered.

Socially battered?

Do you know what relational
aggression is?

Well, I, um-- (clears throat)
Uh, no.

Well, it's complicated.
But for the sake of simplifying it,

while boys bully with fists, girls do it
with gossip, exclusion, put-downs.

With boys, it's the enemies doing the
damage. With girls, it's the friends.

And the scars
go much deeper.

And girls, in a word,
are vicious.

It's causing your daughter a tremendous
amount of stress.

Hmm. Well, she-she hasn't...
said anything.

They never do. Maddie was involved
in a three-way last night.

Do you know what
a three-way is?

Ms. McBeal?

(stammers, clears throat)

Well, y-yeah.
Uh, it's-it's when, um,

three people engage
in-in-in--

-A phone call.
-A phone call.

Two friends conspire
against a third.

Last night, Maddie and Myra
called Jodi.

Myra didn't tell Jodi
that Maddie was listening.

Then she got Jodi to talk about Maddie,
and...

she said some
very nasty things.

That's the game-- to get the
unwitting girl...

to talk about the girl she doesn't know
is listening in.

-What did Jodi say?
-A lot.

But, you know,
on top of this,

Maddie is feeling
enormously displaced.

She had a lot of friends in New York.
They're gone.

Her father is gone. Her whole life seems
to have been ripped from her.

So it's, uh-- (sighs)
It's-It's serious?

Ms. McBeal, your daughter basically
had the form of a nervous breakdown.

She's 10.

I'm just so caught
to the quick.

-Marriage?
-It doesn't mean I don't love you.

Oh, come on.
That's not it.

And-And I want you to-- to be the
best man.

Richard, do you really
know this woman?

John, every relationship,
it's like a-a cave.

You explore it, you mine it,
but you have to be willing...

to venture into
a little darkness.

That's the--
the glory of love.

And with Liza, the-the best cave
is padlocked till after marriage.

-Love is the-the key.
-Richard, this is serious.

That's right. For once,
I'm being serious.

No, you're not. You're being insane.
This is worthy of Ally.

Are you afraid of Liza leaving you?
Is that it?

That is it, isn't it? Every love you've
had has died.

-I want to get married!
-You've known her a month!

-Hey!
-(screams)

Talkin' about me?
Oh, hi, John.

Oh, so cute.

Look, Liza, I don't mean to be a stick in
the mud here,

but I have a problem with this.

Now, what are your reasons
for getting married?

Oh.

Well, first, if a woman
goes too long without marrying,

men start to think there's
something wrong with her.

Divorcées fare better.

And second, well,
Fishy's so fun and exciting.

-Fishy--
-Listen. About the wedding.

I don't like
walking down the aisle.

It feels too formal. That's how we walk
into court, for God's sake.

I want to be suspended
from the ceiling.

Uh, the--

-If you love me, you'll say yes.
-Uh--

Hello? Liza! Liza!
(chuckling)

Oh, my dear!

Oh, thank you for coming.
This is Reverend Buck.

He's gonna perform
the ceremony.

Richard, great pleasure.
Oh, my son.

-(laughing heartily)
-(farts)

I can't believe it.
You're getting married!

She's like my own daughter. And you're
getting married! (muffled chuckle)

(groans)

-It's okay. Don't worry.
-(grunting)

-Did it happen?
-What?

-I guess it did.
-(objects clattering)

Emotions make him go
vasovagal.

-Vasovagal?
-Vasovagal.

That, and laughter.
But he wakes right back up.

Wait. Emotion and laughter,
uh, make him faint?

-No biggie.
-No biggie?

Uh, how can you perform
a wedding ceremony?

Reverend, when Liza and I,
uh, exchange our vows,

when we look into each other's eyes
and express our love,

-I can assure you it's gonna be funny.
-(groans)

You did that on purpose.

-What--
-Are you okay?

I'm fine. I'm fine.
I'm fine. I'm fine.

-Richard, Ally's called a meeting.
-Ally called a meeting?

You made her partner.
Now she gets to call meetings.

Oh, well--Um--

Well, where is she? She calls a meeting,
then she doesn't show up.

Easy, little guy.

Don't call me "little guy,"
youngster.

Thanks, everybody, for coming. Sorry about
the short notice, but-but it's important.

You're changing hair color?

No, it's not that important.
But, um, I am resigning.

Effective immediately.

-Ha, ha.
-No, I am.

Maddie's having emotional problems,
so I've decided...

to take her to New York so she can be
close to her friends.

And my house is on the market if anybody's
interested, and, um--

Well, that's it.

All I ever wanted was-was to be rich
and to be successful...

and to have three kids and a husband who
was waiting home for me at night...

to tickle my feet
and-and--

And look at me!
Look at how I've--

I don't even like my hair.
(sobbing)

-(door opens)
-Ally.

-Are you all right?
-Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. I'm fine.

I can see you're not.

(clears throat) You just announce that
in the staff meeting?

Well, uh, what did
you want me to do?

Call everybody in
one by one?

You could've called me in.
You owe me that.

Excuse me.

Oh, hello.
I'm Claire Otoms.

-Uh, A-Ally?
-Uh-uh, Richard. Not now.

Never mind "not now." You don't just
announce you're leaving and then--

-I said not now.
-When then?

ALLY:
Elaine!

I don't care!
This is way too rash.

Oh, don't-don't lecture me
on rash, Mr. Groom.

At least take some time
to think this through--

No. I don't have any time.

Why? Because Maddie's missing her
friends?

No, no! Maddie is cracking up.

-Well, it could be genetic.
-Richard, she's falling apart.

The doctors are telling me
that it is serious.

Her emotional health
is affecting her nervous system.

She needs to go back to New York,
and I need to go with her.

And I--

(inhales, exhales sharply) I just really
need you to accept this, Richard.

What about...
your career?

(sighs)
Well, they-they--

they have law firms
in-in New York.

You know, it could be temporary.
Maybe I'll be back--

It won't be temporary.

You wouldn't be resigning if you thought
it were temporary.

I want you at my wedding.

I'll be back. In three weeks?
Suppose Maddie's sick?

-She won't be.
-I just talked it over with Liza.

We can push it up.
When do you have to leave?

(chuckles) Tomorrow night.

-Then the wedding's tomorrow.
-Oh, Richard.

We'll have a small ceremony right here in
the office, do the church thing later.

Richard, you don't have to have
a ceremony--

I want you at my wedding.

-I will be back.
-Suppose Maddie's sick?

She is not that sick.

Well, we'll have a small ceremony...
here, tomorrow.

And if possible, you can come back, uh,
for the church thing...

later.

But we're
exchanging vows...

tomorrow.

-Tomorrow?
-I know. I know. It's insane. But--

They're gonna have a reception
at the bar afterwards,

and then I'm gonna come back here,
and we're still gonna make our flight.

Why do we have to rush?

Because Dr. Winston thinks
it's very important...

for you to go to school now
before summer break...

so you can reconnect
with your friends.

♪ Ooga, chucka
ooga, ooga ♪

♪ Ooga, chucka ooga, ooga
ooga, chucka ♪

Oh, no. No, no. What?
What? What, you think you're funny?

No, no. No, no, no. And-And-And you?
This--

This is not your moment.
Okay?

And-And you--You're not--
You're not even from New York.

-(snickering)
-Ally?

♪♪ (stops)

Who-Who are you
talking to?

Oh, just, uh,
one of my fantasies.

You know I told you I talk to them
sometimes.

Can you excuse me
for just one--

-one second?
-♪♪ (resumes)

Okay, if any of you plan on going with me,
you can forget about it.

You can forget about it right now, okay?
Are we clear? Do you hear me?

(doorbell buzzing)

Oh, brother. You know, this is just--
Well, what? What?

What now? What?

-True?
-True.

Oh, come on, Renee. Please, don't-don't
you start too.

It-It's tough enough as it is.
And, hey-- Hey, you and I, Renee,

we haven't seen all that much
of each other anyway.

And, you know, we might
see each other more now...

since we're forced
to make an effort.

So we could kind of look at this as a--
as sort of a reunion.

Okay?

Okay.

Would you, I mean,
consider me?

Well...

I probably wouldn't
consider dating you...

because you're my boss,
and--and we work together.

But otherwise, yeah.

I would consider it.

I'm sure I would...
otherwise.

Nelle? Hello.

-How long have you been there?
-Have you talked to her?

-Who?
-Ally.

About what?

Nelle, we all move on at some point.
Richard's getting married.

Ling became a judge.
Ally's going to New York.

People move on. It's part of life.
People move on.

Right.

Why are you in this--
this thing?

Uh, emotion makes him
go vasovagal.

-Vaso what?
-Not to worry.

The robe will cover
the harness.

If I should black out, just give it a
quick, short, stiff tug.

-This is ridiculous.
-The harness keeps me from falling.

The tug wakes me up.
It's so I won't miss a beat.

Am I the best man,
or the designated rope tugger?

-You're both! Just do it!
-Richard, come here.

This is either an example of your newfound
maturity,

or your dumb stick's
defining moment.

John, truly. Have I ever
made sense to you?

-Yes. It's always been about the money.
-Exactly.

This time, it-it isn't. You know,
lots of people elope on a whim.

I just want to do it
with my friends there.

-And Ally there.
-Ah!

-Hey.
-Hey.

-So, are--are you ready for the wedding?
-Oh, yeah.

We've had some fun times in here,
haven't we, Renee?

Yeah.

Remember when
you lost the bet,

and you had to get up there
and tell the dirty joke?

(chuckling)
Oh, God!

First flea goes, "Well, okay.
Why are you cold?

Didn't you do what I said?" And the second
flea says, "I did exactly what you said.

I went into a bar.
I had a couple of drinks.

I climbed right up the leg of
a beautiful stewardess.

I nestled in, and I passed out
all snuggled up.

And the next thing you know, I am zoomin'
down the freeway...

in the mustache of some guy
on a motorcycle."

-(all groaning)
-(laughing)

That was terrible.
Oh!

Hello, Renee. Are we doing
one-on-ones now?

Oh, Elaine.

The wedding's about to start.
You're wanted upstairs.

Do you, Richard, take Liza to be your
wedded wife? To have and to hold--

-Why is the minister in a cage?
-Shh!

-You "shh!"
-Am I underdressed?

-Shh!
-You look like a float.

-Shh!
-To love and to cherish always?

I do.

And do you, Ally,
take Billy, Larry, Victor--

whoever--
to be your wedded husband?

To have and to hold
from this day forward,

for better, for worse,

for richer, for poorer,
in sickness and in health,

to love and
to cherish always?

Duh.
That's why I'm here.

-Hello?
-Hello, dear.

Now, you each have a ring.
You have written your own vows.

Would you care
to go first, Liza?

Richard, I know everyone thinks
I'm getting married...

because I'm sick
of being a virgin,

and 'cause I wanna have sex in
keeping with my values.

But...
the truth is...

I really do love you.

I'm not a person
who loves easily,

if at all.

But, Richard,
I love you.

(gasps)

That was beautiful.

-Richard?
-Oh, uh, yes. Um-- (clears throat)

I think the-the question
on a lot of your minds, uh,

since we haven't known
each other too long,

will we be having
safe sex tonight,

or will we, because
we're husband and wife,

automatically donate
the Trojans to a shelter?

(chuckles)
Well, the truth is,

safe sex has always
been easy for me.

Safe love--
That's something different.

Then I met you--

someone who's just
as afraid of it.

Just as outwardly...
dismissive of it.

But inside,
just as desperate for it.

Uh, I-I think, uh,
one of the reasons I, um--

I wanted to, uh,
get married today,

there's a risk that Ally
might not make it back in June.

And I was, uh--

I was unwilling
to assume that risk.

Ally, uh,

the Biscuit said that...

my marrying Liza today
was worthy of you.

And-- (sighs)
I would agree.

Without your influence, I don't think I
would be open to the--

Well,

the insanity that's just caused me
to go with what I feel.

And I know what I feel.

I love you, Liza.

(sniffles)

And I'm betting on that love,
as new as it is.

With this ring,

I give you something
I've never given anybody--

my heart.

And with this ring,
I give you mine.

What God has joined together,
let no man tear asunder.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you
Mr. and Mrs. Richard Bump!

Kidding!
Fish. Fish.

♪ I know something
about love ♪

♪ You've gotta want it bad ♪

♪ If that guy's
got into your blood ♪

♪ Go out and get him ♪

♪ If you want him to be ♪

♪ Every part of you ♪

-♪♪ (continues)
-Stranger.

(gasps)
Georgia! Hey!

Hey!

-So he actually got married?
-Yes, he did, an hour ago.

And-And he's--
he's still married.

-What is going on?
-Well, you know what?

They really do love each other.
Evidently, it happens.

-And you?
-Oh, you heard.

I did.

She just needs to be in her old
environment...

you know,
at least for now.

It's not like I've been seeing
that much of you, but--

-I mean, to think that you're moving away.
-I know. I know.

(shudders)
You know what? Oh!

We shouldn't think
about it tonight.

Tonight is Richard's night,
and we should... celebrate.

-Okay.
-So... cheers.

Oh. Cheers.

♪ It's been that way
for man and woman ♪

♪ Hey, they were created ♪

♪ To make love their destiny ♪

♪ Why should true love
be so complicated ♪

♪ Oh, yeah ♪

♪♪ (continues)

-♪♪ (funk)
-(cheering)

♪ He met Marmalade
down in old New Orleans ♪

♪ Struttin' her stuff
on the street ♪

♪ She said
Hello, hey, Joe ♪

♪ You wanna give it a go ♪

♪ Gitchi, gitchi
ya, ya, da, da ♪

♪ Gitchi, gitchi
ya, ya, here ♪

♪ Mocha chocolata, ya, ya ♪

♪ Creole Lady Marmalade ♪

♪ Voulez-vouz coucher
avec moi ce soir ♪

♪ Voulez-vouz coucher
avec moi ♪♪

(sighs)

I just never figured...

you could meet the person of your dreams
at age eight.

Hey.
What are you thinkin' about?

Oh, uh, just, um...
stuff.

Hard to say good-bye,
isn't it?

Well, it-it really, uh,
isn't good-bye.

I wish that everybody would--
would stop thinking that.

I-I plan
to keep in touch.

I meant the room.

A lot happened
in this office.

Well, what do you mean?

Just... stuff happened.

A lot of memories.

Uh--

Well, you know, a room is a--
is a room.

(chuckles)
You know. Four walls.

Yeah.

Well, I'll give you some time with
these... four walls.

Larry, you've only seen the tip of the
neurotic iceberg. I'm demented.

-What else?
-Self-absorbed.

-What else?
-Vain.

What else?

Maybe incapable of
letting myself be loved.

That we need
to work on then.

Um, Ally?

John! Hey.

I thought you were
avoiding me.

-Me? No.
-Well, we--

(sighs)
We haven't talked about this.

Well, it's--

I mean, there's
nothing really to say.

I know why
you're leaving.

I know it's
the right decision.

You know... how I feel
about you leaving.

So I guess there's no need for--
for words.

Maybe not.

You're the soul
of this place.

In some way, you've become the soul
of all of us.

And I am afraid of what will happen
when you go.

I think you underestimate
your own soul, Mr. Cage.

I do have a parting gift.

Um--

It's a necklace.

A friend of mine
designed it.

It's remains
of the Trade Center.

I figured it was fitting,
since you're--

It's beautiful.

I'm sure it will look
beautiful on you.

-Well, I was right.
-Thank you.

(inhales sharply)
L-Look.

Um--
(clears throat)

(chuckling)
I know.

Well, there's probably a
party going on downstairs.

I think we should
join them.

Right.

♪♪ (funk)

Whoo-hoo-hoo!

It's their first match.
Possibly, their last.

They really got it together,
didn't they, baby?

Nothing but
Richard and Liza.

They really, really got it together,
didn't they?

And isn't that nice?

♪ You're the first
my last ♪

♪ My everything ♪

♪ The answer to ♪

♪ All my dreams ♪

♪ You're my sun
my moon ♪

♪ My guiding star ♪

♪ My kind of wonderful ♪

♪ That's what you are ♪

♪ I know there's only ♪

♪ Only one like you ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ There's no way ♪

♪ They could make two ♪

♪ You're all
I'm livin' for ♪

♪ I'll keep you forevermore
You're the first ♪

♪ The last ♪

♪ My everything ♪

-♪ And with you, I've found ♪
-(cheering)

-Oh, my God!
- ♪ So many things ♪

♪ A love so new
only you ♪

♪ Only you could bring ♪

-Did you get him for me?
-I did. For you and Debbie.

-Well, it's a party now.
-Yes, it is.

Won't you miss this?

I never said
I wouldn't miss it.

Come on.
Let's dance.

-Oh, come on, Nelle.
-♪ So many ways ♪

♪ That I can love you, baby ♪

♪ I will love you until ♪

♪ Until the day I die ♪

♪ You're all I'm livin' for ♪

♪ Your love I'll keep
forevermore ♪

♪ You're my first
my last ♪

♪ My everything ♪

♪ I've seen so many ways ♪

-♪ That I ♪
-♪ Will love you, baby ♪

♪ I will love you until ♪

♪ Until the day I die ♪

♪ You're all
I'm livin' for ♪

♪ Your love I'll keep
forevermore ♪

♪ You're my first ♪

♪ My last
My everything ♪♪

♪♪ (ends)

Ooh!

-What time's your flight?
-At 10:00.

Yeah, I-I guess I'm gonna have
to leave pretty soon.

Uh, you don't mind if I take your office,
do you? It has better light than mine.

Fine.

Listen, Ally, I know we've had our
differences. But I--

(chuckles)

Is there anything I need to know in
particular about your office?

Just that it's lucky.

Oh.

Good. That's, uh--
That's good to know.

♪ Here's a photo
I've been looking for ♪

♪ It's a picture
of the boy next door ♪

Ally, uh--
You all right?

Yeah, I-I just need
to get some air.

♪ Never knew it
till he moved away ♪

♪♪ (continues: faint)

(shudders)

Mmm.

You okay?

Hi.

Well, I must not be okay.
Otherwise, you wouldn't be here.

I summon you up
whenever I'm-I'm--

You know, I'm-I'm--
I'm fine.

How can I help you?

Living without me is one thing.
Living without them--

Maddie needs to go,
and I'm her mother.

You have to do
what you have to do.

Oh, that-that's
an Ally McBealism.

Are you seein'
anyone up there?

I'm not supposed to be giving out
inside information, Ally.

But, uh, your life,

it all works out.

Mmm.

Yeah.

It's workin' out, Billy.

It's-It's been...
working out.

And you summoned me
now because--

I don't know.

Maybe I need to say
good-bye to you too.

I had a feeling.

Don't ever forget.

And don't... you.

All of my heart.

Forever and ever.

Oh. Hey.

My, uh--
My-My flight is-is, uh--

So I'm gonna leave now.
And, um--

You know, this isn't good-bye. So if
anybody's about to get all emotional--

My dam's about to break.

You know, Nelle, you are the biggest fraud
I've ever met.

You have a huge heart,
and you don't fool anybody.

And... I'm gonna miss you.

(sighs)

Don't, uh,
be a stranger, okay?

Like we were this year?

Exactly.

(chuckles)
Oh, Richard.

I just--I can't believe that you got
married before I did.

Bygones.

Oh, God.

(sobs)
You see?

(sobbing)
I'm sorry.

You know how
I feel about you.

Renee, Renee.

It's like you said.

We'll be forced to make
an effort now.

That's right.

I think--

I think I'll miss you
most of all, Scarecrow.

You know, I--
I love you all so much.

Every one of you.

And-And the last
five years have--

I love you all, and, um--

And I'll, uh--

I'll call.

♪♪ (soft rock)

♪♪ (Vonda vocalizing)

♪ And all those friends ♪

♪ Where did they go ♪

♪ I don't know ♪

♪ And all those friends ♪

♪ We used to know ♪

♪ In the neighborhood ♪

ALLy NARRATING:
Looking backwards,

many of the saddest times in my life
turn out to be the happiest.

So I must be happy now.

Yeah.
This is gonna be good.

Why else would I be crying?

♪ In the neighborhood ♪

♪♪ (vocalizing)

♪♪ (ends)

WOMAN:
You stinker!