All language subtitles for Ally.McBeal.S04E07.2000.Disney+.WEB-DL.1080p.H264.AAC-HDCTV_track6_[eng]

Previously on Ally McBeal.

I was disappointed that you didn't kiss me
last night. There. I said it.

-I kissed you.
-On the forehead.

You can't even catch anything from that.

I didn't want to blow it
by going too fast.

Are you seeing anyone?

She's really a--

-I didn't tell him.
-You were about to.

-Why don't you just say it?
-She has a penis!

I'm influenced
by the way others see us.

Well, then let's just be adult about this.
Good-bye, Mark.

-A date?
-Yes.

-With you? Yes.
-Yes.

I know this is a stupid question,
but I'm gonna ask anyway.

-I don't have a penis.
-Excellent.

I've never been this forward
with a man ever,

but would you like to
have dinner or something?

Yes, I'd love to.

I hope you don't mind
my bringing Mommy along.

Oh, no.

She usually comes
on all my dates.

♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey
What do you say ♪

♪ Sherry darling ♪

♪ Your mama's yappin'
in the backseat ♪

♪ Tell her to push over
and move them big feet ♪

♪ Every Monday morning
I gotta drive her down ♪

♪ To the unemployment agency ♪

♪ Well, this morning I ain't fightin'
Tell her I give up ♪

♪ Tell her she wins
if she'll just shut up ♪

Is he singing
about me and Mommy?

Of course not.

It sounds very on point.

♪ You can tell her there's a hot sun
beatin' on the blacktop ♪

Don't be ridiculous.

♪ She keeps talkin',
she'll be walkin' that last block ♪

♪ She can take
the subway back ♪

-♪ To the end of the line ♪
-He's really good.

[Chuckles]
Isn't he?

-Oh, please.
-Gross.

♪ But I didn't count
on this package deal ♪

He's singing about us.

He is!

Don't be--
[Stammers] silly.

♪ So you can tell her there's a hot sun
beatin' on the blacktop ♪

♪ She keeps talkin' she'll be walkin'
that last block ♪

♪ She can take the subway back
to the end of the line ♪♪

♪ I've been down
down, down ♪

♪ I've been down this road ♪

♪ Walkin' the line
that's painted by pride ♪

♪ And I have made mistakes
in my life ♪

♪ That I just can't hide ♪

♪ Oh, I believe I am ready ♪

♪ For what love has to bring
Yeah ♪

♪ I got myself together, yeah ♪

♪ Now I'm ready to sing ♪

♪ I've been searching
my soul tonight ♪

♪ I know there's
so much more to life ♪

♪ Now I know
I can shine a light ♪

♪ To find my way back home ♪

-♪ Oh ♪
-♪ Hoo, hoo ♪

♪ Baby, yeah ♪

-♪ Hoo, hoo ♪
-♪ Oh, yeah ♪♪

It's not natural that you
haven't slept with him yet.

Why?

Well, you've been together
over a month.

Well, not every couple just jumps right
into bed, Ling.

Oh, that's right, Elaine. You wait and
count to three first. I forgot.

[Nelle] Well, I don't think a
relationship has to be about sex,

but I would be asking myself
if he doesn't want it.

-He wants it.
-Just not from you.

All right. Look.

When you meet the right man, which none of
you have, with the possible exception...

of you, Ling--I-I do agree that Richard
Fish is probably your perfect soul mate--

you-you do not rush it.

You-You hold longing stares.

You have an extended courtship. Th-That
first touch of the hand--you relish it.

The first kiss--you savor it.

You-You become, um, uh, patient when you
know that it's right.

Y-Y-You don't race.

I love where I am
with Larry at this moment,

and I am not gonna let these times get
preempted by a horny moment.

[Pop, Air Hisses]

[Gasps]
It's--It--

-[Chuckles]
-No. D--

All right. First up.

Remember, we have that charity auction
tomorrow at lunch. We all--

-[All Groaning]
-N-Never mind.

It's one date for a good cause. This year
I think it's, uh, cripples.

I got names in a hat--
uh, cup.

First man and first woman drawn--
you'll do it.

I don't want to hear a single complaint.
Me. Damn it. Do-overs.

-Uh-uh. No--
-No, no.

All right. All right.
All right. Nelle.

Oh, yuck.

Uh, bid on me,
would ya, Ling?

I don't want to get stuck with a beast.
Okay. Uh, next up--

Ally, your--
Forgive me. One sec.

Ally, was your
little squeeze box...

making fun of my situation
with Kimmy last night?

My "little squeeze box"?

Yeah. I heard him sing
"package deal," uh,

"Tell the mother
to stop yapping."

He looked our way too. Now, I don't
appreciate that kind of garbage.

Um, John,

Bruce Springsteen
wrote that song.

I don't think he had you in mind
at the time.

Oh, yeah, yeah. Get flippant.

That'll mitigate
the offense just fine.

He marked on John's turf.

Yeah, we don't need to hear
from you either, Goldilocks.

Excuse me.
We've been sued by the Peanut.

-Excuse me?
-Sexual harassment.

Who's the Peanut?

This little librarian clerk,
left about a year ago.

Sexual harassment?
Anybody here harass him?

-[Scoffs]
-Right.

Well--

Elaine, in my office,
please. Ling, Mark,

you two will handle this.

I'm tired of getting sued for this.
Let's go.

[Chuckles]

What was that?

What?

Oh. It's nothing.

I think you know that Larry
wasn't ridiculing you, John.

Oh, maybe I feel
deserving of ridicule.

I'm a grown man.

I'm dating a woman who takes
her mother on dates.

-I mean, what the hell is that?
-Ah.

Well, didn't she go on the first
couple of dates alone?

Yes, but as
the relationship deepens,

she becomes more prone
to emotional intimacy.

For that, she needs
Mommy Dearest.

Look, Ally. I'm an odd man myself.

John.

Obviously you care about her--
so much so that you even pretended...

to be a rock-and-roll singer.
[Chuckles]

Why-Why don't you just talk to her and-and
tell her that the mother is unacceptable?

She's fine for holidays,
but not dates.

It says here you repeatedly offered
to have sex with him.

[Elaine] It was a joke.
He knew I was joking.

We're friends.
This doesn't make sense.

It says here also that you made him
eat your underwear?

I never made him. I would just demonstrate
my inventions for him.

I invented some edible
cherry-flavored underwear,

and I offered it to him once
as a light snack.

Uh, Ling, you're fired.

-What?
-This is real.

This man has a legitimate case, and I need
a real lawyer, preferably outside counsel.

Mark, hire Larry Paul.
Do it now.

I'm very disappointed.

Hey, bitch.
What's up?

[Sighs] You seem happy.

Richard fired me off the Peanut case.

-Want to go shopping?
-Might as well.

Gotta get something for this stupid
auction tomorrow.

Nelle, it's for a good cause.

Maybe somebody rich
and handsome will bid on you.

[Toilet Flushes]

Can you imagine how much money
I'd bring in?

No, Ling. How much?

Tell you what. Since it's such a great
cause, why don't you volunteer too?

I'll bet whatever's bid on you that it
won't be higher than what's bid on me.

-Nelle.
-Come on, Ling,

Ms. "Every Man Wants Me."

You couldn't possibly
be afraid of losing.

It's just, how do I know you won't
recruit somebody...

to bid on you
more than you're worth?

Here's a flash.
Men go nuts for me.

I'll admit you have this whole dark-haired
exotic thing going,

but when it comes to
a man's true fantasy,

I am it.

I'm tall, I'm gorgeous,
and I look like I have brains,

which I, in fact, do have.

You:
You're short,

and you bite.

[Door Opens]

Ladies.

-[Ringing]
-[Coins Clink]

[Vonda] ♪ Part of me wants to
break the ice ♪

♪ And part of me wants to leave it
exactly how it stands ♪

♪ Part of me
wants to roll the dice ♪

♪ And part of me wants to leave them
curled up in my hands ♪

Uh--Hmm. Huh?

♪ Where they will be safe ♪♪

Hey, Larry. I--
I-I was just coming to see you.

-I was on my way to see you.
-You were?

Mm-hmm! Hey, they say it's a good
sign when a couple can meet halfway.

-Are we a good couple?
-I see potential.

Uh, what are you thinking?

-I don't believe in that.
-Believe in what?

Uh, telling each other
what we're thinking.

You know, overtalking, uh,
can make you lazy.

I'm sorry?

Well, part of communication is silent body
language. Mood, you know.

Reading each other. You know, figuring it
out, instead of just...

flipping to the back page
for the answers.

I'm having a little trouble
reading you then.

All right. I'll tell you this...
one thing.

What?

Standing here, right now,

I'm totally freezing.

-Let's go.
-Where?

Uh, back to your office. Richard Fish, uh,
hired me.

[Bell Ringing]

-He-He did? Why?
-Mm-hmm. Uh, something about peanuts.

Even that nickname
I find insulting. Peanut.

-I never called you--
-Elaine. As I understand it,

you've had that
nickname all your life.

Yeah. That doesn't mean
I had to endure it here.

-But you're suing her for what she did.
-[Attorney] All right. Look.

You called this meeting, saying you wanted
to dispose of this matter.

Well, I'm not comfortable
letting him speak freely.

So, either an offer must be presented,
or I must let my, uh--

my discomfort prevail here.

Daniel,
you and I are friends.

[Chuckles] Oh, no. I'm sorry.
I can't allow that.

No, I cannot. I'm not comfortable off the
record. If you want to depose him,

then I suggest we adjourn and come back
with a stenographer--tomorrow.

Uh, why don't we
do that, then?

-[No Audible Dialogue]
-[Phone Rings]

-Something's goin' on here.
-What?

I don't know. They're friends a week ago,
now he's suddenly suing,

and he seems too angry
for something that happened--

Sorry.

You know, I didn't appreciate that little
"package deal" number last night,

and if you sing it again, I'll damn well
have something to say about it.

[Mouths Words]

[Elevator Bell Dings]

John, I came as soon
as I could.

What's wrong?

-Is there a problem?
-Well,

yes.

A little one. And I'd like to
discuss it alone--

as in the two of us.

Well, if it's a problem,
Mommy can help facilitate.

The problem is Mommy.

And not withstanding all of the benefits
with respect to facilitating intimacy,

I really don't need, or want,
an emotional chaperone.

I'm a big boy.
You're a big girl.

And I think we can navigate
this terrain without Mommy.

Oh.

C-Can she think about this?

Fine.

[Door Opens]

-[Phone Rings]
-You're in the auction?

What can I say?
My heart beats philanthropy.

Ling, what's going on?

That bitch Nelle thinks she can raise
more money than me.

-Ah.
-You think she can?

Well, that's a tough one.
Uh, of the women I've paid for,

the blondes have been more expensive,
but they don't have your warmth.

[Growls]

She had me try it on.
A bra.

-It was for the face, was it not?
-Yes, but--

And, sir, was there anything
remotely sexual

about either the bra or its stated
purpose?

-No, but--
-It was more about isolating...

facial muscles
to prevent wrinkles.

It's still a bra.

Sir, you've remained
friendly with Ms. Vassal...

-over the last year, have you not?
-Yes.

You've even had dinner together,
on occasion.

Have you not?

-Y--Yes.
-So, what changed?

-Since a year ago.
-When you left on good terms.

-A week ago, when you had dinner.
-And now?

-When you have--
-[Larry] Obvious animosity--

-Towards Ms. Vassal.
-[Attorney] Objection.

I'm not comfortable with you both teaming
up to form a single question.

-My mistake.
-I apologize.

-We both do.
-You're trying to rattle me--

because you know I'm easily thrown
when two people are talking.

It's this inner ear thing,
which she told you. Nice.

-Daniel--
-Objection.

Look. All we're trying to do here is--
Daniel, what happened?

One minute you're friends.
The next, you're suing her.

I was traumatized by one of her
little inventions.

-[Larry] Which one?
-The Vi-Bra.

I can't even look at
another woman's breasts...

without experiencing
vertigo.

The Vi-Bra?
What is the Vi-Bra?

It is a device deliberately
designed to titillate.

And it was the last straw.

I knew I had to get out of here when
she demonstrated that one.

I thought maybe I could just get by it,
but I can't. I can't. I just can't.

-This is not why he quit.
-How does it vibrate?

Well, I hold a wireless remote,
and I control it.

All right. Show us.

Okay. [Clears Throat]
It has multiple features.

I can make them go
up and down, together,

-or in opposite directions.
-[Beeps]

[Whirring]

-[Beeps]
-Side-to-side.

Same thing--
together or opposite.

[Whirring]

Rolling, where they go
round and round.

I got that idea
from those massage chairs.

Soft vibrate, where
they just kind of shimmy.

[Giggles]
That feels kind of cool for me.

Nipple projection.
In and out, varying degrees.

-And then, augmented.
-[Beeps]

Sometimes you're in company
when you just want to be bigger.

-[Beeps]
-Sometimes not.

-You invented that?
-There are a few wrinkles still.

Cell phones.

[Rapid Beeping]

Okay. The bid is 2,500.

We're looking for 25. Who's gonna make
it 25?

I will!

We got 25 right there.
Now we're lookin' for 3,000.

3,000 all the way in the back. Now we're
looking for 3,250. 3,250 over here.

How about 3,500? Come on, ladies
and gentlemen. 3,500.

Look how lovely she is. She's beautiful.

You don't want to pass up
an opportunity like this. 3,500!

That girl is way overpriced.

-She does look pretty good.
-Hmm.

-Can we go now?
-No. We are here to bid on Richard.

Remember? He's afraid
that he won't get bid on.

-How high can we go?
-He said up to a thousand.

Now we're looking for a nice, even 4,000.
We got 4,000?

There, to the gentleman.
We got 4,000.

Now we're looking for 4,500.
There, sir. Thank you.

Now we're looking for 5,500.
Fifty-five down over here.

Now we're lookin' for a nice,
even six. $6,000. 6,000.

Back to you again, sir. Thank you for that
bid. We've got a bid of 6,000.

That bid of 6,000
is going once, going twice--

Sold, for $6,000...

to the lucky gentleman in blue.

[Knocks]

John?

-Lynnie. Hello.
-May I sit?

Certainly.

Obviously Kimmy has some rather severe
social issues.

She's very intelligent,
but--what can I say--

she needs to have
her mother there to--

She's in therapy.

And one day
she will hopefully...

feel the autonomy to allow her to have
a relationship without the--

I guess I'm here
right now because...

I sense something
different in you, John.

You seem to see the beauty of my daughter
beneath her eccentricities.

I'm here to--to beg
your continued tolerance,

if not indulgence.

Lynnie, I realize that
even the best of people...

come with their--
their little quirks,

but... I don't see
how anyone...

could carry on a relationship
under these circumstances.

Well, I--
I guess you couldn't.

Until you try.

Couldn't we get together
tonight and--

and try and talk it out?

She can come to talk it out.

Either she will choose
to trust me, or not.

Okay. I'll tell her.

Next up, another lawyer. Senior partner
in his own firm.

Please welcome Richard Fish.

-Richard!
-Whoo!

And we're gonna start
the bidding on Mr. Fish--

at just $500.

Do we have 500? 500 in the back.
We're looking for 750.

750 in the front. Thank you.
Now a nice, even thousand.

We got a thousand again in the back.
Thank you. Now we're looking for 1,250.

We got 1,250.
We're goin' to 15.

1,500. We got 1,500.
Now we're lookin' for 2,000.

We got 2,000 over here. Thank you.
Now we're lookin' for 3,000.

I think he wants you to bid.

Uh-huh. I'm only authorized
to a thousand.

-[Auctioneer] We got 4,000.
-[Foot Stamps]

I think he's trying
to authorize more.

Looking for 55. Fifty-five here.
Who's gonna make it 65?

Sixty-five right here.
We got 6,500. 6,500.

Does anybody want to
make any further bid?

We got 6,500 going once,
6,500 going twice--

[Mouths Words]

Sold for 6,500
to the gentleman in the front.

Thank you, sir.

Whoo! Yeah!

Whoo!

Next up, please welcome
Ling Woo.

-[Man] Yeah.
-[Man #2] Whoo!

Or should I say "wow"?

We are gonna open
the bidding at $5,000.

I've got 5,000 over here.

Now we're looking for six.
6,000. 7,000.

8,000. 9,000. 10,000.

Eleven. Twelve. Thirteen. Fourteen.
We've got $15,000.

Sixteen. Seventeen.
Eighteen. Nineteen.

Now we're looking for 20. Who's gonna make
it 20? $20,000!

21,000. Looking for 22.

You can sit
anywhere you like.

-Is there a required time limit thing?
-For what?

Our date.

Is this it? Uh, uh, a trip
to your office?

I'm really backed up. I can talk for
five minutes to make it official.

Are you serious?

Look. You don't expect me
to go out on a real date...

with a man who bids
on women at auctions.

Hey. If I'm willing to be with a woman who
allows herself to be bought--

That was for charity.

Yes. And you seem
like a real giver.

Hey. What do you know?
Time's up.

Guess it flies
when you're having fun.

Well, let's see if you can fly, Superman.
I'll open the window.

Funny. It's a testament to your
unlikability that I didn't laugh.

Ah. Are you confused
as to where the door is?

You said you would
open the window.

Here.

I'll give you a nice little hug
and a quick peck on the lips.

You'll get your
6,000 dollars' worth.

It was fun.
Don't call me.

[Exhales Deeply]

Look. I'm sorry.

I had no idea.

I'm really sorry.

Good.

Sorry about what?

I have a few therapist
friends that--

I really didn't realize.

Realize... what?

You have an intimacy disorder. I thought
it was just hostility,

but the rigidity of your body
and the tension.

-I do not have an intimacy disorder.
-It's okay, Nelle.

It's nothing
to be ashamed of.

I'm not ashamed
of-of anything.

You shouldn't be.
You're a beautiful woman.

I can be plenty
intimate, buster.

Okay.

Okay.

Well, it was nice
meeting you.

And if you ever
want to talk about it--

I don't need--
[Exhales Sharply]

How's that?

Wow. That was
amazing, actually.

But intimacy
isn't about giving.

-It's receiving.
-Well, kiss me, then. Go ahead.

-I'm not going to.
-Put your mouth where your diagnosis is.

-Look--
-Kiss me.

Well, okay.

Um--

Wow.

So,

date's over?

We've been here three hours.

Is that bad?

I only bought one date.

And I hate to think that this has been it,
and it's almost over.

Are you dying?

What?

I--I don't know
what made me say that.

I, uh--I just got this rush
that I would...

never see you again.

[Chuckles] Well, I certainly hope
you're not psychic.

-This is very unusual for me.
-What is?

[Sighs]
To blow off work.

To have feelings.

I mean, uh,

primal feelings.

I'm not sure
I like having them.

If you were never
to see me again,

-how would you want to spend the evening?
-Why do you say that?

Oh, I--I don't know.

I've always said you should live
life like there's no tomorrow.

And I suppose I never have.

Mmm. Yeah.

If there were no tomorrow.

-You did what?
-And I wanted to do more.

-Ling, can you believe it?
-No.

It's--It's not
like me to ever feel...

hot.

I mean, I--
I might even enjoy,

-you know--
-Sex?

Well, I don't understand it. I don't
even know him.

He's rich. He's a doctor.
What else is there to know?

Ling, you gotta help me.

What?

Paul, the man who bought me--You know,
it's his choice where we go on the date.

-He insists it be the bar.
-Well, that's nice, Richard.

-We'll all be there to rescue you.
-But I'll be seen with a man.

I'm going to the bar
with my date.

If not to a hotel room.

Hello! I need some help.

Paul says he has a feeling about me.
He thinks I'm special.

-Are you falling in love?
-[Groans] Forget it.

Should I wear
a different dress?

What if she's not
at our exact table?

No. She can't be there at all.

John, my problem
borders on a disorder.

Have you never
been with a man?

Of course not.
I'm chaste.

Is your acute
sense of morality...

a convenient way of dealing with
your intimacy problems?

Perhaps.

-Well--
-[Taps Chair]

it's time
to take the leap.

Will you catch me?

I'll try.

-[Phone Rings]
-[Woman] Cage & Fish. May I help you?

Elaine, Larry and I both think we should
make an offer.

Peanut's agreed
to come in tomorrow,

and we think we can
settle it within the policy.

Oh. Okay.

-Mark, is everything okay?
-Fine.

-Will I see you later?
-Oh. Sure.

-What's going on?
-Excuse me?

-Why are you being so cold?
-I'm not.

If you've got a problem,
just say it, Mark.

Don't make me be the one with the stones.
We know how much you hate that.

Okay. My problem.

-[Beeps]
-[Whirring]

That is my problem, along with
the cherry-flavored underwear.

Why?

Because I enjoy promiscuity less when it's
coming from the girl I'm dating.

-[Beeps]
-This is who I am, Mark.

You either choose to date me or not,
but this is who I am.

-[Cell Phone Rings]
-[Whirring]

Cell phone!

[Ringing]

-You two are dating?
-We were.

-Since when?
-Since last week.

But all good things
must end, I guess.

[Gasps]
Hi, stranger.

Uh--Oh, uh, Ally, right?

Funny. Mmm.

-I've been, um, missing you.
-On purpose.

Funny again.

Ally, I'm sorry to interrupt.
Hello, Mr. Larry.

I've agreed to go on a date with John
without my mother,

which has left me a
little fraught.

Anyway, I was wondering,

could you go with me tonight to the bar as
kind of a surrogate?

A surrogate mother?

Of course you can
invite Mr. Larry.

The truth is
you give me balance.

Um--Uh, K-Kimmy--

You wouldn't actually
have to do anything.

If you could just be in
the room, it could bolster--

We'll be there.

Ooh! Thank you.

Why is it when I come here I always feel
I've walked in halfway through the movie?

-I'll get you up to speed.
-Huh.

♪ You're just
too good to be true ♪

♪ Can't take my eyes
off of you ♪

♪ You'd be like
heaven to touch ♪

♪ I want to hold you
so much ♪

-I can't believe I've known you only--
-Ten hours and 13 minutes.

-You counted the minutes?
-I sort of have to.

Why?

-♪ You're just too good to be true ♪♪
-I have a long story.

A dance is part of
the date, Richard.

Uh, a fast dance maybe, but--

No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
See, I paid $6,500.

Paul, you seem like a swell guy,
but I'm homophobic.

I can show you a note from the doctor.
Tell him, Ling.

♪♪ [Up-tempo Pop]

-Ooh. This is a fast one.
-Ah--Oh--

♪ Goin' out of my head
over you ♪

♪ Out of my head over you ♪

♪ Out of my head
day and night ♪

♪ Night and day and night
day and night ♪♪

-♪ You're just too good to be true ♪
-[Richard Whimpers]

♪ Can't take my eyes
off of you ♪

Thank you for being
so understanding, John.

Is it difficult
being without her?

Well, I'm coping.

Well, I'm glad,
because the other--

♪ At long last
love has arrived ♪

♪ And I thank God I'm alive ♪

♪ You're just too good
to be true ♪

-Mommy's over there, Kimmy.
-♪ Can't take my eyes off of you ♪

Did you know?

♪ You're just too good
to be true ♪

-♪ Can't take my eyes off of you ♪
-[Whimpers]

♪ You'd be like heaven
to touch ♪

♪ I want to hold you
so much ♪

-You doing okay?
-Fine.

-Just thinking?
-Yeah.

And I'm still not allowed
to ask you what about?

♪ You're just too good
to be true ♪

♪ Can't take my eyes
off of you ♪

I may not be psychic, Greg, but I can see
something's wrong.

Well, I'm afraid
you are psychic.

That rush that you got earlier that you
would never see me again?

I'm-I'm not dyin'.

But tomorrow, I do go away.

-♪ You're just too good to be true ♪
-Forever.

[Sighs]
What are you talking about?

You ever read about that doctor convicted
of euthanizing his A.L.S. patient?

♪ To be true ♪

♪ Can't take my eyes
off of you ♪

I get formally sentenced
tomorrow in court,

then begin serving
a life term.

♪ I want to hold you so much ♪

♪ At long last
love has arrived ♪

♪ And I thank God I'm alive ♪♪

Murder?

Well, that's why
he looked so familiar.

I'd seen his face
in the news.

He gets sentenced today.

And he spent his last day
of freedom with you?

I mean,
doesn't he have family?

He does. He, uh--

He said he wanted to spend his last day
anonymously, not as a victim.

Are you okay?

Me? Sure.

Hey. It's not as if I loved the guy, Ling.
I only knew him a day.

Sometimes you can
love somebody in a day.

Well, I guess you could
still visit him.

Nah.

No. He, uh--

He-He doesn't want that.

I'm fine.
It's just...

funny, huh?

Hysterical.

[Elevator Bell Dings]

Oh. Elaine.

Everyone's assembled in the
conference room. You should get in there.

-What about you?
-I'll be in in a second.

-Mark.
-Richard.

-John.
-Richard.

-Oh, here. Here he is.
-Oh, John.

I didn't know.

You know, chastity
is a virtue I prioritize...

far less than honesty, Kimmy.

I just needed her to be in the room.
I'm sorry.

Uh, it's difficult to make a relationship
work under any circumstances these days,

but, uh, I find it impossible
to make one work under these.

If I could just have
one more chance.

It's not about chances, Kimmy.
You're not ready.

You need to get some more
work done before--

So that's it, then?

You're just dismissing me?

Without prejudice.

Come on, Mommy.

Something wasn't right.
I couldn't figure out what.

You leave on friendly terms, you continue
to be friends with Ms. Vassal,

then suddenly a week ago
you become angry, you sue.

What happened
a week ago, Daniel?

I object to the informality. Please
address my client as Peanut.

Mr. Robin.

You found out she was seeing him, didn't
you? She told you about her new boyfriend.

-I don't know what you're talking about.
-I'm talking about...

detecting an undercurrent of emotion

in this case that has nothing to do with a
nickname.

Do you love Elaine?

No.

Do you like her?

I'm not comfortable
with that.

Daniel.

Please, talk to me.

Do you have any idea what it feels like
to be singled out...

as the one male that you don't
want to be with?

And you walk around
throwing yourself at--

But with me, it's just--Uh, it's just
insulting. That's all.

I offered to have sex with you
all the time.

Yeah, as a joke.

Wasn't it a fun joke? And then, uh, dress
me up in the face bra.

How fun. You treated me
like I was a pet.

Daniel,

it seems that I'm perceived as this
promiscuous woman who--

It's more about--

I do things for attention.

I do things to get noticed.

Are you suing to be noticed?

It just seems like everybody's your type,
Elaine, but me.

And it hurts.

[Man] And I'll remind the court
just one last time.

This was a mission of mercy.

Dr. Barrett acted to spare
a patient intense suffering.

The only reason
we're all here...

is because he didn't play games with
some Kevorkian machine that...

would have allowed us all
to wink and...

circumvent the law.

-Thank you.
-[Judge] I understand that, counsel.

But by not allowing us to wink, he has
left me with no choice.

Dr. Barrett,
would you stand, please?

As the judge
who sat on your trial,

I must say I have
a deep admiration for you.

And compassion--
though I doubt...

it would rise up
to the level of yours.

But pursuant to the statute,

I must nevertheless
sentence you to a life term.

I do so now,
to be served at Cedar Junction.

God bless you.

Bailiff,
take him into custody.

[Gavel Raps]

It's all right.
It's all right, Mom.

-It's all right, Dad.
-We love you, Son.

The Peanut loves Elaine?

Seem so.
We settled it, anyway.

-Richard's happy.
-Mmm.

-And how did you figure this out?
-Well, just did.

Wow.

You seem to be really intuitive about
what's going on with other people.

Uh, look. Ally.

I, uh--

I know you're probably wondering why
things maybe haven't,

uh, accelerated as fast
as--as maybe--

You know, last week, I-I opened up to you
more than I ever--

That was exhilarating
and, uh, a little scary.

-And it's--it, uh--
-Scared you.

Well, I'm not afraid of this.

I'm really, really excited.
If you only knew... how.

I'm doin' a lousy job
of explaining it.

No, you're not.

You...

want to take it really slow...

because you want it to be right.

Well, slow doesn't
bother me, Larry.

You and me--
we're-we're gonna get there,

and we should just
enjoy the ride.

[Exhales]

How about tonight we--

How about tonight
you let me cook you dinner?

That'd be great.

[Knocks]

One date with a gay man and you're already
going down under desks?

Cindy.

-[Thuds]
-Ow.

Hi. How's it going?

-Fine, Richard.
-So, how'd you know about my, uh--

Slow dance?

I orchestrated it, Richard.
That's why I'm here.

I've come to apologize.
It was cruel of me.

What--You orchestrated it?

What are you talking about?

I knew your firm
was involved in the auction,

and I figured you'd be--

So I sent some guys
to bid on you.

Wh--And paid $6,500?

Well, that's how much
your homophobia hurt me.

Anyway, it was cruel of me,

and today I feel foolish.

Uh, so, uh, uh, Paul--

He-He wasn't, uh, really gay.
He was just pretending?

-No, he's gay.
-Oh. Well, no biggie.

Seemed nice.

-Good dancer.
-Look. Um, again, I'm sorry.

It was childish.
[Clears Throat]

But at least it was for
a good cause anyway.

-[Door Closes]
-[Woman] Thank you for holding.

-Cindy.
-Mark. [Chuckles]

How's--You know.

-How's it hangin'?
-Going. How's it going?

Fine. You?

[Mark]
Oh, uh, fine. Fine.

-That's great.
-What--What brings you here?

Oh, I just had some business with Richard.
That's all.

-You seein' anybody?
-No.

-You?
-Well, a little.

Great.

Um--

-Merry Christmas.
-You too.

[Elevator Bell Dings]

Listen.
About what I said--

It's okay.
I'm over it.

You want to grab
some dinner tonight?

Mark, I try not to date men
on the rebound.

What are you talking about?

I think you know
what I'm talking about.

-[Sighs]
-[Vonda] ♪ Mmm, mmm ♪

♪ Nobody feels my pain ♪

♪ Tonight as I stand
inside the rain ♪

-♪ Everybody knows ♪
-[No Audible Dialogue]

♪ That baby's got new clothes ♪

♪ But lately
I see her ribbons ♪

♪ And her bows ♪

♪ She takes
just like a woman ♪

♪ And she makes love
just like a woman ♪

♪ Yes, she does ♪

♪ And she aches
just like a woman ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ But she breaks
just like a little girl ♪

♪ And when we meet again ♪

♪ And are introduced
as friends ♪

♪ Please don't let on ♪

♪ That you knew me when ♪

♪ You take
just like a woman ♪

♪ Yes, you do ♪

♪ And you make love
just like a woman ♪

♪ And you ache
just like a woman ♪

♪ Ooh
But you break ♪

♪ Just like a little girl ♪

♪ Yeah, and you break ♪

♪ Just like a little girl ♪♪

[Woman]
You stinker!