All language subtitles for Ally.McBeal.S02E05.1998.Disney+.WEB-DL.1080p.H264.AAC-HDCTV_track6_[eng]

[ Vonda ]
♪ Oh, the red, red robin ♪

♪ Comes bebop a-bobbin' along
Along ♪

♪ There'll be no more sobbin' ♪

♪ When he starts throbbin'
his own sweet song ♪

♪ Oh, wake up
Wake up, you sleepyhead ♪

-[ Tape Slowing ]
-♪ Get up, get up and get outta bed ♪

-♪ Cheer up, cheer up... ♪
-[ Sobbing ]

♪♪ [ Slows, Stops ]

Excuse me. Are--
Are you all right?

Yeah. I'm okay.

Sometimes I'm just so okay
I have to sit and cry about it--

Let some of the joy out.

I-I-- I was just
being concerned.

Thank you.

Maybe I could help.

You've already done
more than enough.

-Really.
-Hmm.

You know, if you're gonna
sit on a sidewalk and cry,

you have to expect people
to stop and ask to help.

You shouldn't be rude
to them when they do.

The reason that I'm crying is because
I just came from the doctor's,

where he diagnosed me
with acute courtesy disorder,

which causes a compulsion
to be impolite.

So I'm sorry if I upset you--
bitch!

You made all of that up. There's no such
thing as a courtesy disorder.

If you could just
please leave me alone.

Okay?

[ Onlookers Murmuring ]

Sorry. I dropped my bag.

-Could you get it?
-Sure.

- [ Woman ] Don't get involved.
- [ Chuckles ]

-Here you go.
-Thanks.

[ Grunts ]

[ Onlookers Clamoring ]

- Get up.
- [ Groans ]

- It's your turn.
- [ Man ] Could I play?

[ Police Radio Chatter ]

Hey, hey. Hey, hey.
Officer.

H-H-How's it goin'?

♪ I've been down this road ♪

♪ Walkin' the line
that's painted by pride ♪

♪ And I have made mistakes
in my life ♪

♪ That I just can't hide ♪

♪ Oh, I believe I am ready ♪

♪ For what love has to bring
Yeah, yeah ♪

♪ I got myself together ♪

♪ Now I'm ready to sing ♪

♪ I've been searching
my soul tonight ♪

♪ I know there's
so much more to life ♪

♪ Now I know
I can shine a light ♪

♪ To find my way back home ♪

♪ Oh ♪

♪ Baby, yeah ♪

♪ Oh, yeah ♪

-[ Buzzer Buzzes ]
-This way.

-You're back.
-And I have my stationery.

-What'd you do this time?
-She assaulted me.

-[ Man ] Let's go.
-[ Together ] No, no, no.

-The same cell?
-I am afraid of her.

Come on. Let's go.

[ Man #2 ]
We're on a schedule.

[ Women Chattering ]

This is untenable.

-What do you mean, she got arrested?
-She wasn't that clear.

She evidently went to help
somebody in distress,

-and kicked her.
-That's clear.

What?

- Settle.
- [ Croaks ]

[ Richard ] Upcoming regionals.
This must be the stair "compulsories."

-John.
-Competition is Saturday.

-Ah. So he'll be hopping around all week.
-He won't interfere.

-Hey, John.
-Ah, Nelle. Stefan, Nelle.

[ Gasps, Screams ]

Aaah! Good God! Stefan.

-Is he hurt?
-I don't know. How could you do that?

Mmm, sorry.
[ Stammers ]

-Frogs gross me out.
-You could have killed him.

-He went for me.
-His heart is racing.

-Check myself for warts.
-Give him to me.

My father's a vet.
Give him to me.

[ Nelle ] What's he doing
with a frog, anyway?

Hey, buddy.
Oh. There you go.

He seems to be okay.
What happened?

-Nelle tried to kill him.
-I did not.

- I saw you.
- [ Nelle ] He scared me.

-No, he's fine.
-Yeah, may I see him, please?

-He's beautiful. White's tree frog?
-Uh-huh. Yeah.

You cracked a rib.
It hurts to breathe.

Yeah, well, tough fracture.
I-I mean break.

Can a bruised rib get
you out of a court date?

I-I just ask because
you look like you'd know.

-Do you have a record?
-No. I--

Well, maybe a little one.

-Mm-hmm.
-What-What do you have to go to court for?

I'm being sued tomorrow,
and my lawyer dropped me.

Well, you can get a continuance.

They're not gonna make you
go forward without counsel.

-What-What are you getting sued for?
-Assault.

-Who did you assault?
-My best friend.

At least she was my best friend
until she slept with my boyfriend.

She slept with your boyfriend,
and she's suing you?

Well, I picked her up
and sort of threw her.

- Well, well, well.
- Oh, don't "well, well" me.

I stopped to be a good Samaritan--
And she has a history of violence.

-[ Buzzer Buzzes ]
-Oh, tell the world.

-You both can go.
-We can?

Unless you wanna make a citizen's arrest
against each other.

-We don't. Do we?
-No.

Well, let's go.

You know, I-I'm a lawyer.
Do you want me to represent you?

-What?
-Well, I could at least

help you get a continuance,

in exchange for you
agreeing not to sue me.

Are you any good?

Are you here to surprise me?
To take me out to lunch?

It's 9:30.

Well, lunch would
certainly surprise me then.

Actually, I'm here
because I've decided...

to quit the magazine,
like we talked about, and start up my own.

Excellent.

And I need to file corporation
papers and all that.

I thought Ally
could handle it.

Great. Actually--

Richard or Nelle
are better in corporate.

Ally's a litigator.

Oh, so I should talk
to Richard or Nelle.

-I can set up an appointment for you.
-Great.

-I'll talk to you later.
-[ Chuckles ] Sure.

-Aaah!
-[ Laughs ]

-Oh, I'm sorry. I-- Oh.
-It's okay.

Wait. Here.
Here, let-let me--

Oh, I really have to start
watching where I'm going.

- Actually, I came in here to see you.
-Really?

Yeah. Yeah.

Um, I'm starting a corporation
for my new magazine.

Do you do corporate work?

-M-Me? Sure.
-Elaine thought, uh, Richard or Nelle.

Oh. Well, they-they--

They do specialize in it
more than me. Yeah.

-Okay.
-Yeah. Mmm.

-[ Chuckles ]
-Well--

Uh, i-it was great
to see you again.

-Oh, you too.
-[ Clears Throat ]

Actually, um, you know,

since you were
my lawyer before,

I think I'd feel
more comfortable if--

-That is, if you think you can do it.
-Uh, sure. No problem.

-Should I set up an appointment?
-Uh, yeah.

Yeah, an-an appointment.

Uh, how about
the end of the day?

-Great. 6:00?
-Great.

Nice running into you.

-Sorry.
-Bye.

-Morning.
-Morning.

- [ Gasps, Screams ]
- [ Croaks ]

I'm sorry.

- They just, uh--
- Did you want something?

J-Just to apologize
for--

Did you know he's sitting
on your-- your head?

It's a place
of comfort to him.

Mmm. Uh--

I-I'm sorry
that I rattled him.

I know this competition
is-- is important...

to you.

Your Honor, in the interest of fairness,
we would like at least a month...

- so that we could prepare--
- This is her fourth continuance.

This case has been marked
"no further continuances."

So what are you gonna do,
let her proceed without counsel?

-She has you.
-But I just got the case.

Y-You can't penalize her for
getting dumped by her lawyer.

-She fired her lawyer.
-'Scuse me?

Just like she fired the lawyer before
that and the lawyer before that,

all on the eve of the trial, in order to
get another continuance.

Well, uh, Your Honor,
given that my client...

has not been truthful with me,
I would like to withdraw as counsel.

Too late.
We start tomorrow.

-You are her lawyer, hmm?
-You can't make me.

The bad news for you
is I can.

The good news--
Dress however you like.

10:00. Adjourned.

I didn't lie. I just didn't
volunteer information.

-Don't take it out on me.
-That's what you're here for, Elaine.

Your job, in part, is to be here for me
to take things out on.

I gotta be ready for a damn trial
12 hours after getting a case.

So you're unprepared.
It's not like people will notice.

-Excuse me?
-[ Elevator Bell rings, Door Opens ]

Well, I meant that in a good way.
You're so great off the cuff.

Hello?

-George-- Hi.
-Hi.

Twice in one day--
To what do I owe?

I-- I'm meeting with Ally,
getting my corporation started.

-Ally's gonna do it?
-Y-Yeah, I just figured...

-I'd be more comfortable with her since--
-Oh. Well, that makes sense.

-Yeah.
-We gotta get started.

I'm suddenly in trial tomorrow, and I
don't have very much time.

Uh, have a seat.

And, Elaine,
could you hold all my calls?

Sure.

So-- First, you need to decide
who your officers are gonna be.

You-You might want to explore the idea
of a partnership instead of a corporation.

There are just
some tax consequences.

Plus, you can shield yourself
from liability.

Okay.

Do you wanna think about it,
or do you want me to just go ahead and--

What?

I don't care about some stupid
corporation.

I mean, I thought I did.
I do, but--

I'm just trying to invent a reason
to be in a room with you.

[ Inhales ]

Oh.

Ohh-- Um--

I cannot stop thinking about you.

I don't think that we should be
in a room talking about this.

Oh.

Well, I-- I kinda got the sense
that you-- I mean--

-That we, uh--
-I send out a lot of senses,

but--

You're Elaine's boyfriend.
That's the end of the story.

Okay.

Ally, Elaine and I
are not exclusive.

- I date different--
- Ah. You juggle.

I date. And until
I meet the right one, which--

No, I-- I'm in trial
tomorrow, and I--

- I-I-I really--
- Okay. I'm sorry.

It's okay. I mean, I--

- I'm flattered.
- Yeah.

But--

-[ Door Opens ]
-C-Could you, um--

- [ Indistinct ]
- close it?

Sure.

[ Door Shuts ]

[ Exhales ]

So, I'm workin' behind the bar,
servin' a patron.

I look up. There's Hannah.
Uh, her.

- The defendant?
- Yes.

I thought she was there
for her shift, maybe. Mm-mmm.

Then, suddenly,
she grabs me by the hair.

[ Screams ]

Then she knocks me down,

and she's calling me garbage.

And then she-she's coming towards me,
and she's saying stuff like,

"It's time to take out
the garbage."

And she's carrying me
to this big garbage canister,

and she just drops me in.

- Aaah!
- It was--

- [ Moans ]
- the most humiliating moment of my life.

You said you were minding
your own business.

Were you minding your own business when
you started dating Joel Burlington?

Well, yes, because my personal life
is my own business.

A-And you knew that she was dating
Mr. Burlington, didn't you?

Yes.

In fact, Hannah had shared
with you many times,

like friends do, that she was in love
with him, didn't she?

- Yes, but she falls in love a lot.
- Excuse me.

Um, I'm not a lawyer, I admit,
but is she allowed to just lie?

- [ Sighs ]
- Mm, mmm, mmm, mmm.

So knowing Hannah Puck
was falling in love with him,

you begin to date
Mr. Burlington?

- Okay, in my mind--
- Ah, ah, ah. I don't need you to explain.

I'm just looking
for a yes or a no.

-Yes.
-Oh.

Your good friend--

She tells you that she's falling in love
with a guy she's seeing,

and then you begin
to date him?

Ahh. I had fallen in love too.

I see.
And, uh, tell me.

This trash can she threw you in--
Did it fit?

- Objection!
- Oh, withdrawn.

Nothing further.

Do you think you're
in love with her?

How would I know?
We haven't had sex. Ling.

You have to have sex before you know
whether you're in love with her?

-Of course.
-Why?

Because men love any woman they wanna
sleep with. It's the ticket to admission.

Fishism.

- Oh! Oh, God.
- [ Billy ] What?

-John's frog. Why is he always in here?
-He escapes.

That's John's seat.
He probably likes the scent.

Ugh. He shouldn't
be hopping in here.

Come here, big guy.

-[ All Gasp ]
-Great.

- Uh, y-you get him.
- I'm not getting him.

-I'm senior partner. Georgia--
-Forget it.

-[ Flushes ]
-Oh!

Oh, my--

[ Door Opens ]

I like a fresh bowl.

- What?
- Richard has something to tell you.

What?

-[ Door Closes ]
-I just want to say, uh,

good luck
in the competition.

We're all
rooting for you.

Thank you.

-You didn't tell him?
-No.

- Richard.
- It's not something you can just spring.

"Hey, John, what's up? Seen your frog
lately?" [ Imitates Toilet Flush ]

- So what are we gonna do?
- Just let him be missing for a while.

John will worry. In time he'll start
to panic, think the worst,

and when he finds out it is the worst,
at least it won't be a shock.

- Oh, that is--
- Well, then, you tell him.

-You chased him into the bowl.
-All right, look.

There is no way
that we are not gonna tell.

-It's the only decent thing to do.
-Excuse me.

Aaah! Sorry.

Startled me.

Stefan has escaped again.
Have any of you seen him?

-No.
-I haven't.

Me either.

- Damn.
- [ Door Shuts ]

-Mmm, nice going, Mr. Decent.
-Richard,

you've known John the longest.

You were nearest when the frog
jumped. You tell.

I-It went okay, but you need to convince
the jury, Hannah.

-Testify?
-Just speak from the heart.

-Do you have one?
-You know, you remind me of me.

Thanks for helping.

Well, I'm sure at one time you
were a very nice person.

I was.

-Okay, meet me here tomorrow, 10:00.
-Okay.

-Okay.
-Bye.

Bye.

-[ Gasps ]
-[ Laughs ]

-I'm sorry.
-Whoa.

That was close.

You're very flexible.
You could do my wiggle walk.

-Listen, George--
-I know. I came to apologize.

Over a cup of coffee?

I know I put you
in an awkward situation,

but under the heading
of "life is too short,"

I just got a hit the first time
I laid eyes on you.

Well, sometimes the best laid eyes
can end in disaster.

-Elaine--
-I know, but the fact...

that you're also admirable
doesn't help.

It was a treat.

Me too.

Uh-Uh, George? Um--

C-Could you... go...

doing your wiggle walk?

-Excuse me?
-[ Giggles ] Well, I--

I think letting you
just walk off could haunt me.

I think the image
will wash away easier if--

Do you want me to do the wiggle
walk here, on the street?

-Well, you said you were a fan of silly.
-I did?

You also said it made you feel
better when you were sad.

Did I say I was sad?

M-Maybe it's me who's sad.

Okay.

♪ No, no, no, no
Nobody can do the-- ♪

-Wh-What are you doing?
-Oh-- Oh, I--

You don't know. Um-- See,
whenever I do the walk,

I have to do it to this song,
and since I don't have a stereo handy--

Sometimes I hear
the songs in my head.

[ Laughs ] W-Well, that-that--
That's ridiculous.

Nobody hears music
in their heads.

I'm gonna have to get some other lawyer
to handle my corporate work.

-Okay.
-Okay.

-Bye, George.
-Yeah.

See ya.

[ Puffs ]

[ Vonda ] ♪ No, no, no, no
No, no, no, no, no, no ♪

♪ No, no, no
No, no, no, no ♪

♪ No, no, no, no
No, no, no, no ♪

♪ No, no, no, no, no
No, no, no ♪

♪ Nobody can do the shimmy
like I do ♪

♪ Nobody can do the skate
like I do ♪

♪ Nobody can do the boogaloo
like I do ♪

♪ Nobody can do the Philly
like I do ♪

♪ Well, don't you know
I gotta fish, I do ♪

-♪ Ain't nobody do it but me ♪
-♪ Nobody but me ♪

♪ Well, I gotta fish
I do ♪

♪ Ain't nobody do it
but me, babe ♪

♪ Well, let me tell you ♪

♪ But nobody but me ♪♪

[ Whistle Squeaking ]

[ Squeaking Continues ]

Frog call?

There's something wrong, 'cause even when
he wanders, he always comes back quickly.

He's not coming back, John.

He was on your toilet seat again.
I went to catch him.

He jumped into the bowl
right when you came in...

hitting
your automatic flusher.

I-I should have
told you then, but I--

We-We were thinking there'd be some
way to, uh, soften it.

[ Whispering ]
There isn't.

You, know, I wish, uh--

[ Exhales ]

I'm sorry.

-Sure he didn't get out?
-Positive.

-Will you excuse me?
-John, hey--

Like to be left alone,
Richard.

Sure. Uh--

[ Exhales ]

-Richard.
-Hmm.

-Well, what's wrong?
-John's frog--

He was accidentally killed.

Mmm.

Oh.

[ Sniffles ]

♪♪ [ Bagpipes:
"Amazing Grace" ]

What can we do?

Nothing. Just let him know
you're there for him.

Of course, if you were there to grab
the frog, he'd be alive.

-You scared him into the bowl.
-All right.

You have to admit,
this was an overreaction.

Well, I wasn't just hurt.
I was betrayed.

By Ms. Payne?

And Joel. I--
I was in love with him.

I thought that we would--

And when he broke it off with me, the only
person that I could turn to was Laura.

She was my closest friend.

And then I find out
that-that she was--

-So you physically accosted her?
-Well, I think I just lost myself.

I mean, for me
to even be able to lift her...

shows I had to be on some sort
of adrenaline explosion.

She weighs at least 25 pounds
more than me.

[ Whispering ] She's lying.

Objection. My client would like
to have that stricken.

-Did you try to hurt her, Hannah?
-No. I still care for her.

I just-- It was more about acting out
my own hurt, you know?

I mean, I just couldn't believe
that she would--

I-I can't even
bring myself to say it.

Stab you in the back
and steal your lover?

Objection!

- Sustained.
- I'm working toward forgiving her.

I'm surprised she can't see
her way toward forgiving me.

Hmm. That's all
I have, Your Honor.

- Ms. Puck--
- Objection!

- Wh-Where did he come from?
- He filed an appearance.

- But they were hiding him.
- Objection.

You just can't sneak co-counsel
into the room.

[ Judge ] Miss McBeal--

-Who else is under there?
-Miss McBeal!

[ Onlookers Murmuring ]

[ Judge ]
Proceed, counsel.

Ms. Puck,

when you first met your lawyer, you
attacked her with your bag, didn't you?

We had a misunderstanding.

And what happened after
you hit her with your bag?

She kicked me.

- Objection.
- That woman kicked me, Your Honor.

- Objection.
- Get up to the bench right now.

I don't know what the hell is going on
here, but I assure you--

- Is he down there?
- He's down there.

Your Honor,
this is blatant abuse.

They are trying to attack the messenger
by undermining my credibility.

- Did you kick him?
- I thought he was a baby.

Mr. Koolie.

Would you please keep your focus
on the witness,

and not keep going
after opposing counsel?

- Yes, Your Honor.
- Step back.

Put me down.
Put me down.

Put me down!

Thank you.

-Why would they bring in a midget?
-He's not a midget.

He's a 10-year-old genius
with a hormone deficiency,

and they brought him in to make us
both look like bullies.

-Why did you kick him?
-Oh, i-it's a long story.

- [ Man ] Hold that elevator?
- Look. Here he comes.

You know, Oren, I am
really surprised at you.

You know you're being exploited
for your small stature.

- Gotta make a livin'.
- You're 10.

- 55,000, we walk away.
- Not a chance.

-I'll be back.
-[ Bell Dings ]

Cute little guy. He must have
really sailed when you kicked him.

-[ Richard ] What's that?
-It was his remote flusher.

He crushed it.
I found it on his desk.

-Where is John?
-I don't know.

Richard, we have to
do something.

He was so close
to that frog.

[ Knocking ]

- Richard?
- Hey, John. H-How ya doin'?

Okay.

Uh, I'd like to have
a memorial service.

I know it seems silly, but--

-It's not silly.
-Not at all.

Do-Do it here
in the office?

That's fine. Okay.
I'll circulate a memo.

[ Exhales ]

John?

I know I seemed hostile
to Stefan.

-You hated him.
-I didn't.

-I--
-You loathe "frogkind."

When I was seven years old,
I had a hamster.

Millie.

I loved her so much.
[ Chuckles ]

In high school I was
the star of my track team.

I'd win almost every meet.

People would ask,
"How do you train?"

And-And I'd say,
"Hard work."

The normal stuff.
But, uh, truth was,

i-it was because of Millie.

For three years,
from second grade on,

I would sprint home
after school...

because I-I just
missed her so much,

I-I couldn't wait
to see her.

Then one day,

my brother put
an Argentine horned frog...

in my terrarium,
and, uh,

he ate Millie.

It was a year before
I could forgive my brother.

I-I have never
forgiven the frog.

Well--
[ Clears Throat ]

Stefan never hurt anybody
or anything.

Yeah, I know.

I-I was just trying
to explain.

I'm sorry for your loss.

I appreciate that.

[ Vonda ] ♪ As I walk this
land with broken dreams ♪

♪ I have visions
of many things ♪

♪ Love's happiness
is just an illusion ♪

♪ Filled with sadness
and confusion ♪

♪ What becomes
of the brokenhearted ♪

-♪♪ [ Continues, Indistinct ]
-Fifty-five isn't a bad out.

She doesn't have $55,000.

Plus, isn't the other girl the Cruella
here? She took her boyfriend.

Boyfriends are not taken.

People find each other, and sometimes
there's a bump involved.

I'm telling you, Renee,
when I saw him do that wiggle walk--

-Then go out with him.
-I can't.

I--

♪ Every day heartaches
grow a little stronger ♪

Is he here because he knows
you'd be here?

I don't think so.

And though she brought him,
he doesn't know that we all come.

♪ I walk in shadows
searching for light ♪

- ♪ Cold and alone ♪
- Mmm. He does now. He just saw us.

♪ Hoping and praying
for someone to care ♪

♪ Always moving
and going nowhere ♪

♪ What becomes
of the brokenhearted ♪

♪ Who had love
that's now departed ♪

♪ I know I've got to find ♪

♪ Some kind of peace of mind ♪♪

-Where's Ally?
-She went straight to court.

Why am I here?

Because anyone who plans
to be at the service later--

What's goin' on?

The Biscuit will be taking this memorial
thing very seriously.

It would be a disaster for any of us
to crack up, and the likelihood,

with the strange things he says--
We might be tempted to laugh.

So I think we should get it
out of our system now.

That's why you called me here?
To practice a funeral?

For a frog?

Elaine and I have written
a little mock eulogy,

hitting the points John
will probably touch on.

If you have to laugh,
do it now.

You've got
to be kidding me.

No, he's got a point. We don't want
to laugh during the real thing.

Let's just do it, hmm?
Elaine.

[ Clears Throat ]

He wasn't just
a beloved frog.

He was an amphibian
who loved others.

Many reptiles see things
as they are and say, "Why?"

- He is not gonna say that.
- Billy, we're dealing with John Cage.

Who knows what he'll say?
Go on.

He was a giving frog.

Feelings, we can't
really control,

but behavior,
we can and we should.

Is it understandable that Hannah Puck
suffered hurt feelings?

Of course it is.

Is it acceptable behavior for
her to assault Laura Payne--

To throw her into
a trash bin?

Of course not.

And Miss Puck-- She took that stand
defending her actions,

basically saying emotion
just took her over--

Saying that Laura Payne
was the wrongdoer.

For what? For letting her emotion
take her over?

She fell in love.
She fell in love.

Is it unfortunate that the man
was her best friend's boyfriend? Yes.

But love-- true love--

It isn't something that just comes
along like a--

a train where you can say, "Hey, I'll just
catch the next one."

If everything we've been told about
true love is, in fact, true,

maybe it comes along once.

Does it make sense to exalt
the protocol of friendship...

over your one chance of--
[ Exhales ]

Now imagine...

two people being right
for each other,

knowing they're right for each
other and letting it pass...

because she dates my friend.

Any woman who does that--

Well, she sort of dumps herself
in that trash bin, doesn't she?

Her best friend.

Not a friend.
Her best friend.

Leaving her in a big heap.

And then-- [ Chuckles ] she sues her.

And then, because she knows
she looks like the villain she is,

she goes out and hires
a diminutive lawyer...

for the sole purpose
of making me the heavy.

He struts up in court and announces
that I kicked him once.

No relevance except
to make you not like me,

and hopefully then
not like my client--

A gross attempt
at manipulating you,

and he should be
ashamed for it.

-Ashamed.
-[ Bawling ]

Oh. Oh, no.

[ Murmuring, Laughing ]

Mr. Koolie?

She hurt my feelings!

[ Bawling ]

♪♪ [ Bagpipes ]

♪♪ [ Ends ]

I don't want to be
ridiculous about this.

Um, I know
he wasn't human.

But he was a little soul
who touched me,

and I'm not embarrassed
to have loved him.

I'm not ashamed to miss him.

The only thing left
for me to do is to--

[ Exhales, Sniffles ]

honor him,
and I do that...

by sharing my love for him
with those people I love.

To know that it was...

my own hand
that pushed the button,

to know that it was me
who had the toilet altered...

so that there'd be
a stronger flush,

'cause I like a fresh bowl,
and remnants upset me--

Imagine what it must have
been like for him...

to be suddenly caught
in a violent whirlpool...

cascading him.

Well, I can only hope
the bowl was, indeed, fresh--

- [ Giggling ]
- when he fell into it.

- [ Giggling ]
- [ Giggling ]

I'm sorry. Sorry. Sorry.

I just-- I use humor
to preempt the pain.

-[ Giggling ] Me-- Me too.
-It does work.

- [ Suppressing Laughter ]
- [ Sputters ]

[ Stammering ]
Yeah.

Oh. Oh, oh, John--

John. John.

John. John, I--

I-- Oh.

I think you tried
to make us laugh.

-Why would I--
-Because you're angry right now,

and it's easier
than being sad.

It was not my intention
to be funny.

But sometimes you are,
just the same.

Do you remember how you said
people see you as "funny" strange,

while I said I see you
as "special" strange?

Well, I've got news for you. Everybody in
that room thinks you're special,

and that's why they're there.

So go finish your service.

I-If we laugh, we laugh,

but-but go. Finish.

Okay.

I can't walk away
from you.

I won't.

[ Pager Beeping ]

Verdict.

See ya.

[ Chattering ]

-What do you think?
-It's close, Hannah.

Do you think the midget
made the difference?

He's not a midget.

[ Bailiff ]
All rise.

Mr. Foreman,
has the jury reached its verdict?

- We have, your honor.
- What say you?

In the matter of Payne versus Puck,
we find in favor of the plaintiff--

-Yeah!
-Laura Payne, and order the defendant,

Hannah Puck, to pay damages
in the amount of one dollar.

-One dollar?
-That's great.

[ Bawling ]
One dollar?

- [ Judge ] Mr. Koolie?
- Give it a rest, Oren.

- Court dismissed.
- Thank you so much.

You really do remind me of me.

Thank you.

-[ Laughs ] Bye.
-Bye.

- Until we meet again?
- Yes, Oren. Until.

Elaine, what--

What-What are you doing here?

You could have any man
you want, Ally.

Please don't take mine.

-Hey.
-Hello.

I got something for you.

I-I was looking to get
a nice card or--

But I remember
when I lost Millie,

my mother went
right out and--

Here.

She's not a replacement,
but--

Well, she is cute--

for a frog.

-She's an American tree frog.
-Yeah.

She's got those little gecko hands
like Stefan had.

She is so tiny.

- [ Squeaks ]
- [ Gasps ]

Oh.

[ Laughing ]
She likes you.

-She needs training.
-Yes.

Yes, we don't want her
jumping on people's noses.

May I call her Millie?

Sure.

You're a kind person, Nelle.

You won't tell?

Be our secret.

[ Woman ]
Good night. I'll see you in the morning.

Hey.

Look, Elaine's a great girl.

Last thing I want
is to hurt her, but--

Mmm.
[ Clears Throat ]

You know, um,

your wiggle walk?

When I was sad,

sometimes I'd skip.

A-And the way that you can hear
songs in your head?

But, see, underneath all that fun
stuff in common--

What?

we're not right
for each other.

Now, how I know that, I-I can't really
explain, but I do know.

You're lying.

I-- I can't.

Ally, I'm not going
to end up with Elaine.

Well, maybe you will or maybe you won't,
but I am not gonna be the one.

It'll--- It'll hurt her
more if-if I--

I haven't so much
as held your hand,

and already
I'm in love with you.

It's not gonna happen,
George.

[ Vonda ]
♪ Take me home ♪

♪ You silly boy ♪

If you tell me
you don't feel...

a little of what I feel,
I'll leave.

♪ Put your arms ♪

♪ Around me ♪

I...

don't feel what you feel.

♪ Take me home ♪

♪ You silly boy ♪

♪ Oh, the world's
not round ♪

♪ Without you ♪

♪ I'm so sorry ♪

♪ That I broke your heart ♪

♪ Please don't leave ♪

♪ My side ♪

♪ Take me home ♪

♪ You silly boy ♪

♪ 'Cause I'm still in love ♪

♪ With you ♪

[ Woman ]
You stinker!