Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:01:01,262 --> 00:01:02,563
Good afternoon, sir.
2
00:01:02,596 --> 00:01:06,367
We'd like to talk to you about God.
3
00:01:06,400 --> 00:01:07,868
All right.
4
00:01:07,901 --> 00:01:09,036
What do you want to know?
5
00:01:09,069 --> 00:01:10,371
No.
6
00:01:10,404 --> 00:01:13,507
We'd just like to share
the good news that God
7
00:01:13,541 --> 00:01:16,377
has a plan for your life.
8
00:01:16,410 --> 00:01:20,013
You know, you seem like nice fellas,
9
00:01:20,047 --> 00:01:21,462
but I think you should leave now.
10
00:01:21,482 --> 00:01:23,651
You wouldn't like Brutus when he's angry.
11
00:01:26,220 --> 00:01:29,257
Allow me to ask you one question, sir.
12
00:01:29,290 --> 00:01:30,924
Do you know that God loves you?
13
00:01:33,727 --> 00:01:37,265
Hey, let me ask you a question.
14
00:01:37,298 --> 00:01:39,733
Do you believe in heaven?
15
00:01:39,767 --> 00:01:41,269
Yes, sir, I do.
16
00:01:41,302 --> 00:01:44,104
And do you believe
that you, as a believer,
17
00:01:44,138 --> 00:01:46,707
will be among the righteous
living in eternal bliss
18
00:01:46,740 --> 00:01:49,277
when you die?
19
00:01:49,310 --> 00:01:50,510
Yes, sir, I do.
20
00:01:53,947 --> 00:01:57,551
Well, then, allow me
to hasten your reward.
21
00:02:14,202 --> 00:02:16,170
Who loves you, D?
22
00:02:19,507 --> 00:02:20,921
Lucky for you, I persuaded the church
23
00:02:20,941 --> 00:02:23,123
to drop the charges by
assuring them that you're
24
00:02:23,143 --> 00:02:25,145
completely crazy but harmless.
25
00:02:25,179 --> 00:02:26,214
Come on.
26
00:02:26,247 --> 00:02:28,416
I was just messing with them.
27
00:02:28,449 --> 00:02:31,151
It wasn't even loaded.
28
00:02:31,185 --> 00:02:33,354
David, my friend, why don't you
29
00:02:33,387 --> 00:02:35,623
devote that passion and
that fine legal mind
30
00:02:35,656 --> 00:02:36,724
to pursuing real justice?
31
00:02:36,757 --> 00:02:38,239
You mean why don't I don't come back
32
00:02:38,259 --> 00:02:39,159
to be a corporate whore?
33
00:02:39,193 --> 00:02:40,127
Hey.
34
00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:43,264
I resemble that remark.
35
00:02:56,009 --> 00:03:00,147
Really love what you've
done with the place.
36
00:03:00,180 --> 00:03:01,148
Told you.
37
00:03:01,181 --> 00:03:04,818
Jail was a step up.
38
00:03:04,852 --> 00:03:07,288
Come on, man.
39
00:03:07,321 --> 00:03:10,424
It's time to move on.
40
00:03:10,458 --> 00:03:12,159
Crazy, sure.
41
00:03:12,192 --> 00:03:15,028
But harmless?
42
00:03:15,062 --> 00:03:16,464
How dare you.
43
00:03:24,472 --> 00:03:25,606
Oh, yes!
44
00:03:25,639 --> 00:03:26,307
Yes!
45
00:03:26,340 --> 00:03:28,742
Who's your daddy, huh?
46
00:03:28,776 --> 00:03:29,477
Huh?
47
00:03:29,510 --> 00:03:31,979
Did you miss me?
48
00:03:32,012 --> 00:03:35,449
Come, noble Brutus.
49
00:03:35,483 --> 00:03:37,718
You must be hungry.
50
00:03:37,751 --> 00:03:39,867
Thanks for holding down the
fort while I was inside.
51
00:03:39,887 --> 00:03:45,459
I tell you, I what it's
like to be in a cage.
52
00:03:45,493 --> 00:03:47,861
That's why I could never
put you in a kennel.
53
00:03:50,698 --> 00:03:54,234
There's no way I could
incarcerate your soul.
54
00:03:54,268 --> 00:03:57,405
You feel?
55
00:03:57,438 --> 00:03:59,540
Good.
56
00:03:59,573 --> 00:04:01,742
So we're in total accord on that point.
57
00:05:27,361 --> 00:05:28,496
Hola, muchacho.
58
00:05:28,529 --> 00:05:30,531
Are you ready to get your ass kicked?
59
00:05:30,564 --> 00:05:31,803
Oh, let the games begin.
60
00:05:41,108 --> 00:05:44,412
Oh, you want a welcome?
61
00:05:44,445 --> 00:05:45,746
Dirty!
62
00:05:45,779 --> 00:05:48,782
You know what happens to
girls who play that way?
63
00:05:48,816 --> 00:05:52,420
They owe their landlords $850.
64
00:05:52,453 --> 00:05:53,667
That is what I'm talking about.
65
00:05:53,687 --> 00:05:54,555
Whatever.
66
00:05:54,588 --> 00:05:55,789
You're still my bitch.
67
00:05:55,823 --> 00:05:58,258
Because you are a ruthless capitalist.
68
00:05:58,291 --> 00:06:00,060
Face it... you are the man.
69
00:06:00,093 --> 00:06:01,028
Hey.
70
00:06:01,061 --> 00:06:02,362
I work for a living.
71
00:06:02,396 --> 00:06:04,712
I ain't got no time for losers
who can't pay their rent.
72
00:06:04,732 --> 00:06:06,647
I didn't realize you
were such a Republican.
73
00:06:06,667 --> 00:06:07,701
I'm not.
74
00:06:07,735 --> 00:06:08,935
I'm a libertarian.
75
00:06:10,571 --> 00:06:12,453
I just don't get what
a smart girl like you
76
00:06:12,473 --> 00:06:15,008
is doing turning tricks.
77
00:06:15,042 --> 00:06:16,757
I don't get what a big-shot lawyer's
78
00:06:16,777 --> 00:06:19,580
doing sitting around the
house and acting like a homo.
79
00:06:19,613 --> 00:06:20,981
What, you think I'm gay?
80
00:06:21,014 --> 00:06:22,583
I don't know many straight guys
81
00:06:22,616 --> 00:06:25,185
paying me for my
stimulating conversation.
82
00:06:25,218 --> 00:06:26,454
You mean abuse.
83
00:06:26,487 --> 00:06:27,421
Your conversation's about as stimulating
84
00:06:27,455 --> 00:06:28,656
as a kick in the nuts.
85
00:06:31,625 --> 00:06:32,493
Oh.
86
00:06:32,526 --> 00:06:33,994
Pass Go.
87
00:06:34,027 --> 00:06:37,831
Collect $200.
88
00:06:37,865 --> 00:06:40,294
You sure you don't wanna
mess around or something?
89
00:06:43,170 --> 00:06:44,905
No.
90
00:06:44,938 --> 00:06:46,974
Thanks.
91
00:06:47,007 --> 00:06:48,576
Weird.
92
00:06:48,609 --> 00:06:49,777
Same time next week?
93
00:06:49,810 --> 00:06:52,212
Uh, I'm gonna be gone next week.
94
00:06:52,245 --> 00:06:54,915
Where you going?
95
00:06:54,948 --> 00:06:58,519
I'm gonna see my niece in Ocala.
96
00:06:58,552 --> 00:07:00,454
I didn't know you had a niece.
97
00:07:00,488 --> 00:07:02,022
Yeah.
98
00:07:02,055 --> 00:07:03,123
Lucy.
99
00:07:03,156 --> 00:07:04,191
She's nine.
100
00:07:04,224 --> 00:07:09,129
She's, uh... she's a little knucklehead.
101
00:07:22,075 --> 00:07:23,276
So.
102
00:07:23,310 --> 00:07:25,726
Just, uh... just feed him and,
uh, let him out twice a day.
103
00:07:25,746 --> 00:07:27,795
Make sure he's got plenty
of food and fresh water.
104
00:07:27,815 --> 00:07:29,950
And, uh... and that's about it.
105
00:07:29,983 --> 00:07:33,654
It's a... it's a pretty
easy gig since I... I killed
106
00:07:33,687 --> 00:07:35,823
the plants a long time ago.
107
00:07:35,856 --> 00:07:41,128
It's a... it's a long story.
108
00:07:41,161 --> 00:07:42,496
Come here, boy.
109
00:08:31,278 --> 00:08:32,245
Uncle David!
110
00:08:32,279 --> 00:08:33,479
Hey!
111
00:08:35,983 --> 00:08:37,751
Oh.
112
00:08:37,785 --> 00:08:40,954
It's good to see you.
113
00:08:47,394 --> 00:08:48,729
How is she doing?
114
00:08:48,762 --> 00:08:50,063
Not so great.
115
00:08:50,097 --> 00:08:52,666
We're looking at another
round of chemo, maybe
116
00:08:52,700 --> 00:08:53,900
a marrow transplant.
117
00:08:56,737 --> 00:08:58,739
You know, if you need some money...
118
00:08:58,772 --> 00:09:01,208
Look, all I know is
that little girl in there
119
00:09:01,241 --> 00:09:02,142
adores you.
120
00:09:02,175 --> 00:09:03,523
So why don't you quit your yapping
121
00:09:03,543 --> 00:09:04,924
and get washed up for supper?
122
00:09:08,582 --> 00:09:11,719
Dear Lord, please bless all
your children and all those in
123
00:09:11,752 --> 00:09:13,320
need tonight.
124
00:09:13,353 --> 00:09:17,557
And we ask that you bless Lucy
with strength and with health.
125
00:09:17,591 --> 00:09:20,427
And we thank you so for all
your many blessings, Lord.
126
00:09:20,460 --> 00:09:22,876
Please bless this food to
the nourishment of our bodies
127
00:09:22,896 --> 00:09:24,311
and our bodies to your service.
128
00:09:24,331 --> 00:09:25,365
In Jesus' name.
129
00:09:25,398 --> 00:09:26,199
Amen.
130
00:09:26,233 --> 00:09:27,434
Amen.
131
00:09:27,467 --> 00:09:29,603
Holy crap!
132
00:09:29,637 --> 00:09:33,006
...from the Atlantic with winds
of nearly 120 miles per hour.
133
00:09:33,040 --> 00:09:36,710
And meteorologists are warning
it could carry tornadoes as far
134
00:09:36,744 --> 00:09:38,578
inland as the Orlando area.
135
00:09:38,612 --> 00:09:40,160
This is David Frank calling again!
136
00:09:40,180 --> 00:09:42,716
I really need someone to
call me back urgently!
137
00:09:42,750 --> 00:09:43,784
Come on you little brat.
138
00:09:43,817 --> 00:09:46,153
Answer the damn phone!
139
00:09:46,186 --> 00:09:50,257
Isn't there anyone else you can call?
140
00:09:51,291 --> 00:09:52,559
Brutus?
141
00:09:52,592 --> 00:09:56,797
Brutus, if you can hear me,
press the speaker button.
142
00:09:56,830 --> 00:09:57,831
Come on, boy!
143
00:09:57,865 --> 00:09:58,899
Press the speaker button, boy!
144
00:09:58,932 --> 00:09:59,767
Come on, boy.
145
00:09:59,800 --> 00:10:00,533
Come on, Brutus.
146
00:10:00,567 --> 00:10:01,268
You can do it!
147
00:10:01,301 --> 00:10:02,501
Button!
148
00:10:03,771 --> 00:10:04,437
Good dog!
149
00:10:04,471 --> 00:10:05,305
Good dog!
150
00:10:05,338 --> 00:10:06,373
OK, daddy's coming.
151
00:10:06,406 --> 00:10:07,307
It's gonna be OK.
152
00:10:07,340 --> 00:10:08,540
Hang tight.
153
00:10:09,242 --> 00:10:11,478
I'm sorry, but I really gotta go, OK?
154
00:10:11,511 --> 00:10:13,947
OK.
155
00:10:13,981 --> 00:10:15,482
Evacuations are in effect.
156
00:10:15,515 --> 00:10:18,585
Residents are encouraged to
seek shelter or head inland
157
00:10:18,618 --> 00:10:19,818
to safety.
158
00:10:32,499 --> 00:10:33,600
Come on, people!
159
00:10:33,633 --> 00:10:34,833
Come on!
160
00:11:00,928 --> 00:11:02,863
He's not stopping.
161
00:11:24,785 --> 00:11:25,953
Listen to me.
162
00:11:25,986 --> 00:11:28,555
My associate is trapped inside my house.
163
00:11:28,588 --> 00:11:29,823
Comprende?
164
00:11:29,857 --> 00:11:31,792
He is disabled and needs my assistance.
165
00:11:31,825 --> 00:11:32,692
Now, look.
166
00:11:32,726 --> 00:11:34,194
You listen to me, sir.
167
00:11:34,227 --> 00:11:36,409
No one is going into that
area except qualified search
168
00:11:36,429 --> 00:11:37,430
and rescue teams.
169
00:11:37,464 --> 00:11:38,979
Now if you tell us your address, we'll
170
00:11:38,999 --> 00:11:41,334
try to send a team in
to rescue your friend.
171
00:11:41,368 --> 00:11:44,471
Sir, can you please tell
us where your house is?
172
00:11:44,504 --> 00:11:46,006
Right there.
173
00:11:46,039 --> 00:11:47,239
That's my house.
174
00:11:57,818 --> 00:11:59,753
Oh, hell no.
175
00:12:04,792 --> 00:12:05,592
Please.
176
00:12:05,625 --> 00:12:07,160
He's a good dog.
177
00:12:07,194 --> 00:12:09,362
He never hurt anyone.
178
00:12:09,396 --> 00:12:10,230
Take me.
179
00:12:10,263 --> 00:12:10,864
I'm ready.
180
00:12:10,898 --> 00:12:12,365
I'm old.
181
00:12:12,399 --> 00:12:14,733
But don't you dare harm a
hair on that dog's head.
182
00:13:33,146 --> 00:13:35,215
Well, the home is
definitely a total loss.
183
00:13:35,248 --> 00:13:38,118
There's no question about that.
184
00:13:38,151 --> 00:13:41,121
House can be rebuild.
185
00:13:41,154 --> 00:13:45,959
My sweet, noble Brutus
can never be replaced.
186
00:13:45,993 --> 00:13:47,227
Yes.
187
00:13:47,260 --> 00:13:50,830
Well, of course, the dog was not insured.
188
00:13:50,864 --> 00:13:53,400
Is that all you care about?
189
00:13:53,433 --> 00:13:55,002
Money?
190
00:13:55,035 --> 00:13:57,070
I'm deeply sorry for your loss.
191
00:13:57,104 --> 00:13:59,339
At times like this, the financial concern
192
00:13:59,372 --> 00:14:03,710
is definitely secondary to
the extreme and terrible
193
00:14:03,743 --> 00:14:05,245
emotional toll that...
194
00:14:05,278 --> 00:14:09,216
My house was covered for
full replacement value, right?
195
00:14:09,249 --> 00:14:11,851
I'm afraid your policy
196
00:14:11,885 --> 00:14:14,521
does not cover tornadoes.
197
00:14:17,090 --> 00:14:18,725
What are you talking about?
198
00:14:18,758 --> 00:14:20,427
It was a natural disaster.
199
00:14:20,460 --> 00:14:23,196
I'm covered for natural disasters, right?
200
00:14:23,230 --> 00:14:26,033
Yes, certain natural
disasters... floods,
201
00:14:26,066 --> 00:14:27,800
rain storms, lightning strikes.
202
00:14:27,834 --> 00:14:32,605
But as it clearly states,
paragraph I, other damages
203
00:14:32,639 --> 00:14:34,421
due to extraordinary weather conditions,
204
00:14:34,441 --> 00:14:38,345
such as cyclones, tornadoes,
fire storms, locusts, geysers,
205
00:14:38,378 --> 00:14:41,281
tidal waves, and tsunamis
will be deemed acts of God
206
00:14:41,314 --> 00:14:42,896
and not covered under said policy.
207
00:14:42,916 --> 00:14:44,617
Let me see that.
208
00:14:44,651 --> 00:14:45,986
Acts of God?
209
00:14:46,019 --> 00:14:46,987
Acts of God?
210
00:14:47,020 --> 00:14:48,121
What kind of BS is that?
211
00:14:48,155 --> 00:14:48,956
I know.
212
00:14:48,989 --> 00:14:49,923
I hear you.
213
00:14:49,957 --> 00:14:51,124
It's... it's... it's arcane.
214
00:14:51,158 --> 00:14:52,059
It's ridiculous.
215
00:14:52,092 --> 00:14:53,460
But it's the law.
216
00:14:53,493 --> 00:14:55,608
Look, I'm a lawyer, and
this is a load of crap.
217
00:14:55,628 --> 00:14:58,011
As a lawyer, I'm sure you
understand that act of God
218
00:14:58,031 --> 00:15:01,068
is a traditional legal term to
denote natural disasters not
219
00:15:01,101 --> 00:15:03,216
covered under the standard
terms of the policy.
220
00:15:03,236 --> 00:15:04,884
Well, everything's a freaking act of God!
221
00:15:04,904 --> 00:15:08,441
I mean, when I take this putter
and I shove it up your ass,
222
00:15:08,475 --> 00:15:10,457
technically, that's an
act of God, too, right?
223
00:15:10,477 --> 00:15:12,212
There's no need
224
00:15:12,245 --> 00:15:13,580
to get hostile, Mr. Frank.
225
00:15:13,613 --> 00:15:14,347
Oh, really?
226
00:15:14,381 --> 00:15:16,316
You see, I think there is.
227
00:15:16,349 --> 00:15:17,864
Elaine, get security in here now!
228
00:15:17,884 --> 00:15:20,820
Mr. Frank,
I appreciate this has been
229
00:15:20,853 --> 00:15:21,989
a traumatizing circumstance...
230
00:15:22,022 --> 00:15:22,889
Ah!
231
00:15:22,922 --> 00:15:23,856
Please!
232
00:15:23,890 --> 00:15:27,027
I didn't destroy your house.
233
00:15:27,060 --> 00:15:28,761
No.
234
00:15:28,795 --> 00:15:29,995
God did.
235
00:15:37,104 --> 00:15:37,804
Why?
236
00:15:37,837 --> 00:15:39,219
What have I done to deserve this?
237
00:15:39,239 --> 00:15:40,173
Am I a bad person?
238
00:15:40,207 --> 00:15:42,275
Am I am evil person?
239
00:15:44,144 --> 00:15:46,113
Act of God?
240
00:15:46,146 --> 00:15:47,580
What kind of crap is that?
241
00:16:01,294 --> 00:16:02,695
All right, God.
242
00:16:02,729 --> 00:16:04,597
Here I am in your house.
243
00:16:04,631 --> 00:16:06,933
And I want to know, did
you destroy my house?
244
00:16:06,966 --> 00:16:07,634
Come on.
245
00:16:07,667 --> 00:16:08,668
Let's see an act of God, huh?
246
00:16:08,701 --> 00:16:09,169
Come on.
247
00:16:09,202 --> 00:16:09,936
Bring it!
248
00:16:09,969 --> 00:16:11,169
Strike me down!
249
00:16:13,306 --> 00:16:13,973
Yeah.
250
00:16:14,007 --> 00:16:16,943
Act of God, my ass.
251
00:16:16,976 --> 00:16:18,445
How can I help you, my son?
252
00:16:18,478 --> 00:16:20,960
Look, I am not your son,
so just step back, man, OK?
253
00:16:20,980 --> 00:16:22,282
I'm not in the mood.
254
00:16:22,315 --> 00:16:24,131
Well, perhaps you'd like to
tell me what's troubling you.
255
00:16:24,151 --> 00:16:24,951
Troubling me?
256
00:16:24,984 --> 00:16:26,286
Oh, I'm no trouble.
257
00:16:26,319 --> 00:16:28,368
I left trouble behind me
a long time ago, Padre.
258
00:16:28,388 --> 00:16:29,689
What happened, my son?
259
00:16:29,722 --> 00:16:30,890
You want to know what happened?
260
00:16:30,923 --> 00:16:32,239
I'll tell you what happened.
261
00:16:32,259 --> 00:16:33,840
The insurance company
told me that my house
262
00:16:33,860 --> 00:16:35,695
was destroyed by an act of God.
263
00:16:35,728 --> 00:16:41,368
Now, can you tell me why God
would want to destroy my house?
264
00:16:41,401 --> 00:16:43,703
Sometimes when we
suffer a terrible loss...
265
00:16:43,736 --> 00:16:46,306
Oh, just stop with the platitudes!
266
00:16:46,339 --> 00:16:47,340
How can I help you?
267
00:16:47,374 --> 00:16:48,541
You can answer the question.
268
00:16:48,575 --> 00:16:51,044
Did God destroy my house?
269
00:16:51,078 --> 00:16:53,746
It's a yes or no question.
270
00:16:53,780 --> 00:16:54,681
And what if He did?
271
00:16:54,714 --> 00:16:57,150
Well, if God destroyed my house,
272
00:16:57,184 --> 00:17:02,589
then God should pay for it!
273
00:17:42,195 --> 00:17:44,564
You filed a lawsuit?
274
00:17:44,597 --> 00:17:48,335
You're suing someone in a court of law.
275
00:17:48,368 --> 00:17:49,602
Mazel tov!
276
00:17:49,636 --> 00:17:51,704
Oh, I've been waiting for this day, man.
277
00:17:51,738 --> 00:17:52,672
Congratulations.
278
00:17:52,705 --> 00:17:54,774
So, who you naming in the suit?
279
00:17:54,807 --> 00:17:57,110
I'm suing God.
280
00:17:57,144 --> 00:17:57,710
I'm sorry.
281
00:17:57,744 --> 00:17:58,911
I thought you said God.
282
00:17:58,945 --> 00:17:59,812
That's right.
283
00:17:59,846 --> 00:18:01,981
For damages to my house.
284
00:18:03,983 --> 00:18:05,118
Oh.
285
00:18:05,152 --> 00:18:06,986
You're still the same crazy bastard.
286
00:18:07,019 --> 00:18:08,221
It's just a new package.
287
00:18:08,255 --> 00:18:09,389
I need your help.
288
00:18:09,422 --> 00:18:10,970
David, I love you like a brother,
289
00:18:10,990 --> 00:18:13,760
but I am not going to aid and
abet your self-destruction.
290
00:18:13,793 --> 00:18:15,603
My name's still on the door, Bennett.
291
00:18:19,366 --> 00:18:21,301
How the hell do you sue God anyway?
292
00:18:21,334 --> 00:18:24,337
Well, naturally you start by serving Him.
293
00:18:29,209 --> 00:18:32,111
The body of Christ.
294
00:18:32,145 --> 00:18:36,015
The body of Christ.
295
00:18:36,048 --> 00:18:37,817
Bishop Bernardo Rossini?
296
00:18:37,850 --> 00:18:39,152
Yes, my son?
297
00:18:39,186 --> 00:18:41,988
You've been served.
298
00:19:01,107 --> 00:19:03,042
Rabbi Max Grossman?
299
00:19:03,075 --> 00:19:04,244
Yes?
300
00:19:04,277 --> 00:19:05,477
You've been served.
301
00:19:17,056 --> 00:19:18,256
Imam al Bakri.
302
00:20:06,072 --> 00:20:07,206
This is Rachel.
303
00:20:07,240 --> 00:20:09,309
Ms. Levin, It's Sam Grossman.
304
00:20:09,342 --> 00:20:10,610
Rabbi.
305
00:20:10,643 --> 00:20:12,312
What can I do for you?
306
00:20:12,345 --> 00:20:14,547
I'm calling about a legal matter.
307
00:20:14,581 --> 00:20:16,215
A lawsuit, actually?
308
00:20:16,249 --> 00:20:17,850
Oh.
309
00:20:17,884 --> 00:20:20,267
Rabbi, you know I don't do
that kind of work anymore.
310
00:20:20,287 --> 00:20:21,488
I understand.
311
00:20:21,521 --> 00:20:23,623
But this is a unique case, something
312
00:20:23,656 --> 00:20:27,827
I think will be of
special interest to you.
313
00:20:27,860 --> 00:20:29,228
OK, I'll bite.
314
00:20:29,262 --> 00:20:30,462
Who's the defendant?
315
00:20:33,966 --> 00:20:36,303
God needs our help.
316
00:20:36,336 --> 00:20:37,837
Make no mistake.
317
00:20:37,870 --> 00:20:41,341
This case, as unorthodox and
frivolous as it may appear,
318
00:20:41,374 --> 00:20:43,089
is not only a legitimate legal challenge,
319
00:20:43,109 --> 00:20:46,313
but it is also a challenge
to our most core values
320
00:20:46,346 --> 00:20:47,647
and beliefs.
321
00:20:47,680 --> 00:20:49,849
And while there may be
a diversity of beliefs
322
00:20:49,882 --> 00:20:53,386
represented here, there is
one thing that joins us all,
323
00:20:53,420 --> 00:20:55,154
and that's our faith.
324
00:20:55,187 --> 00:20:56,456
We're spiritual beings.
325
00:20:56,489 --> 00:20:59,258
And as such, we are sometimes called upon
326
00:20:59,292 --> 00:21:00,960
to defend that faith.
327
00:21:00,993 --> 00:21:03,129
But to dignify this stunt with a response
328
00:21:03,162 --> 00:21:06,733
would give that schmuck the
attention he craves, right?
329
00:21:06,766 --> 00:21:08,435
I say we take the high road here
330
00:21:08,468 --> 00:21:09,849
and let the poets toss it out.
331
00:21:09,869 --> 00:21:10,603
No.
332
00:21:10,637 --> 00:21:12,004
Stakes are too high.
333
00:21:12,038 --> 00:21:14,541
If, God forbid, any sort
of legal precedent is set,
334
00:21:14,574 --> 00:21:15,888
we could potentially open the door
335
00:21:15,908 --> 00:21:18,778
to billions of dollars
of damaging litigation.
336
00:21:20,012 --> 00:21:23,316
We cannot sit idly by
and allow this blasphemy.
337
00:21:23,350 --> 00:21:25,685
We must defend the honor of Allah.
338
00:21:25,718 --> 00:21:29,489
If that is in a Florida
State court, so be it.
339
00:21:32,058 --> 00:21:36,596
Brothers, sisters, to speak
of defending God's honor
340
00:21:36,629 --> 00:21:39,532
it's paradoxical and only reflects out
341
00:21:39,566 --> 00:21:41,401
own egotism in the matter.
342
00:21:43,169 --> 00:21:45,538
Leave God out of it.
343
00:21:45,572 --> 00:21:46,939
This is a legal matter.
344
00:21:46,973 --> 00:21:50,443
And as my people know,
you cannot trust the court
345
00:21:50,477 --> 00:21:52,044
to deliver justice.
346
00:21:52,078 --> 00:21:53,079
He's right.
347
00:21:53,112 --> 00:21:55,615
This case demands a vigorous defense.
348
00:21:55,648 --> 00:21:57,049
Forgive me, Ms. Levin.
349
00:21:57,083 --> 00:21:59,952
This is all very noble, but
what's it going to cost?
350
00:21:59,986 --> 00:22:03,423
Are you hoping for some sort
of settlement or a retainer?
351
00:22:03,456 --> 00:22:04,757
Absolutely not.
352
00:22:04,791 --> 00:22:07,427
I would insist on doing
this entirely pro bono.
353
00:22:07,460 --> 00:22:09,261
I see.
354
00:22:09,295 --> 00:22:11,398
Why is that?
355
00:22:11,431 --> 00:22:16,035
Let's just say, uh, I owe Him one.
356
00:22:20,339 --> 00:22:22,241
All those in favor of retaining
357
00:22:22,274 --> 00:22:26,513
Miss Levin to represent us
collectively in this matter,
358
00:22:26,546 --> 00:22:28,047
raise your hand.
359
00:22:31,751 --> 00:22:34,454
Well, congratulations,
Ms. Levin.
360
00:22:34,487 --> 00:22:38,157
You are now officially God's lawyer.
361
00:22:47,900 --> 00:22:49,969
You're sure you want to give it up?
362
00:22:50,002 --> 00:22:51,337
Give what up?
363
00:22:51,370 --> 00:22:56,709
That last shred of dignity
that you've been holding on to.
364
00:22:56,743 --> 00:22:59,211
You're missing the point, Bennett.
365
00:22:59,245 --> 00:23:00,079
Oh.
366
00:23:00,112 --> 00:23:01,312
There's a point.
367
00:23:10,089 --> 00:23:14,193
Oh, you don't have to do this, you know.
368
00:23:14,226 --> 00:23:16,496
Actually, I think I do.
369
00:23:16,529 --> 00:23:17,930
Oh, David, my friend.
370
00:23:17,964 --> 00:23:19,746
There's nothing more
annoying and pathetic
371
00:23:19,766 --> 00:23:22,635
than a principled attorney.
372
00:23:25,572 --> 00:23:26,919
Mr. Frank, is
there a statement
373
00:23:26,939 --> 00:23:28,788
you'd like to make
before the hearing today?
374
00:23:28,808 --> 00:23:31,544
Well, I'd just like to
say that I'm looking forward
375
00:23:31,578 --> 00:23:32,945
to a good, clean fight.
376
00:23:32,979 --> 00:23:35,848
I know that God is a tough
and formidable opponent.
377
00:23:35,882 --> 00:23:38,951
But like all deities, He's
got weak spots in his game,
378
00:23:38,985 --> 00:23:39,619
you know.
379
00:23:39,652 --> 00:23:40,900
I think I can take Him, huh?
380
00:23:40,920 --> 00:23:42,349
Anyway, thanks for coming out.
381
00:24:02,742 --> 00:24:05,277
All rise for the Honorable
Justice Jordan Randall.
382
00:24:12,652 --> 00:24:13,852
Be seated.
383
00:24:19,325 --> 00:24:25,131
In the matter of David
Nathaniel Frank versus God,
384
00:24:25,164 --> 00:24:26,879
how does the Lord answer this complaint?
385
00:24:26,899 --> 00:24:28,247
Your Honor, the defense would like
386
00:24:28,267 --> 00:24:30,483
to move for an immediate
dismissal at this time.
387
00:24:30,503 --> 00:24:31,738
On what grounds?
388
00:24:31,771 --> 00:24:33,172
Where do I start?
389
00:24:33,205 --> 00:24:35,121
How about insufficient
cause, lack of jurisdiction,
390
00:24:35,141 --> 00:24:36,656
absence of a corporeal defendant.
391
00:24:36,676 --> 00:24:38,658
And, oh, yeah, how about
that the whole thing is
392
00:24:38,678 --> 00:24:39,959
completely and utterly absurd?
393
00:24:39,979 --> 00:24:41,313
Yeah, but aside from that?
394
00:24:43,049 --> 00:24:44,263
Mr. Frank, I have to agree.
395
00:24:44,283 --> 00:24:45,518
The case seems absurd.
396
00:24:45,552 --> 00:24:48,362
Can you inform me as to why I
shouldn't allow the dismissal?
397
00:24:53,893 --> 00:25:00,032
Your Honor, what is God?
398
00:25:02,468 --> 00:25:04,751
I'm sure there are as many
answers to that question
399
00:25:04,771 --> 00:25:09,208
as there are people in the world.
400
00:25:09,241 --> 00:25:11,377
But I think we can all agree in principle
401
00:25:11,410 --> 00:25:15,081
that God is an entity.
402
00:25:15,114 --> 00:25:17,263
Although we can't see Him
or prove His existence,
403
00:25:17,283 --> 00:25:21,020
He is nonetheless an
entity to which many of us
404
00:25:21,053 --> 00:25:24,223
are faithfully dedicated to.
405
00:25:24,256 --> 00:25:25,958
Your Honor, I respectfully submit
406
00:25:25,992 --> 00:25:29,428
that God is a corporation.
407
00:25:33,065 --> 00:25:36,803
The word "incorporate"
comes from the Latin.
408
00:25:36,836 --> 00:25:39,171
Corporeal, to bring that which is
409
00:25:39,205 --> 00:25:42,408
ethereal into the real
world, which is exactly what
410
00:25:42,441 --> 00:25:44,110
religion is all about.
411
00:25:44,143 --> 00:25:46,746
Like God, a corporation is an entity
412
00:25:46,779 --> 00:25:49,415
which only exists in the abstract sense,
413
00:25:49,448 --> 00:25:51,918
and just as the officers
of that corporation
414
00:25:51,951 --> 00:25:54,721
execute the will of the corporate entity,
415
00:25:54,754 --> 00:25:57,489
so the clergy act as intermediaries
416
00:25:57,523 --> 00:26:01,661
between the divine abstraction
and the great unwashed.
417
00:26:01,694 --> 00:26:07,033
You might say that religion is,
in essence, God, incorporated.
418
00:26:07,066 --> 00:26:08,615
Your Honor, using this corporate model,
419
00:26:08,635 --> 00:26:11,250
I intend to demonstrate that
if the destruction of my home
420
00:26:11,270 --> 00:26:14,774
is legally deemed an act of
God, then these religious groups
421
00:26:14,807 --> 00:26:16,976
must be held responsible for that damage
422
00:26:17,009 --> 00:26:21,180
or be in violation of
fair trade practice law.
423
00:26:21,213 --> 00:26:24,116
Your Honor, that's a
delightful little legal balloon
424
00:26:24,150 --> 00:26:26,485
animal that Mr. Frank
just twisted for us,
425
00:26:26,518 --> 00:26:29,335
but I don't see how that has
any real relevance to the motion
426
00:26:29,355 --> 00:26:30,555
to dismiss.
427
00:26:35,795 --> 00:26:37,163
Ten-minute recess.
428
00:26:39,265 --> 00:26:41,267
This man is a complete lunatic.
429
00:26:41,300 --> 00:26:46,605
He's flamboyant,
outrageous, and delusional.
430
00:26:46,639 --> 00:26:48,274
He's perfect.
431
00:26:48,307 --> 00:26:50,777
If I take his case,
I'll be the laughing stock
432
00:26:50,810 --> 00:26:52,178
of the 11th Circuit.
433
00:26:52,211 --> 00:26:54,126
No one's going to be
laughing at you, Judge.
434
00:26:54,146 --> 00:26:55,915
They'll be talking about you.
435
00:26:55,948 --> 00:26:59,118
Everyone will be talking about you.
436
00:26:59,151 --> 00:27:01,187
You give this nut job enough rope,
437
00:27:01,220 --> 00:27:03,122
let him inflame the religious right,
438
00:27:03,155 --> 00:27:07,459
then you get to be the hero who
executes justice and saves God.
439
00:27:07,493 --> 00:27:10,029
This is a gift.
440
00:27:10,062 --> 00:27:11,664
It's a divine gift.
441
00:27:11,698 --> 00:27:12,631
You think so?
442
00:27:12,665 --> 00:27:14,934
I do, Senator.
443
00:27:24,677 --> 00:27:26,378
Regarding the motion to dismiss,
444
00:27:26,412 --> 00:27:28,815
after careful
consideration, Mr. Frank
445
00:27:28,848 --> 00:27:30,362
has demonstrated to my satisfaction
446
00:27:30,382 --> 00:27:32,584
that this case is not without merit.
447
00:27:32,618 --> 00:27:33,818
Motion is denied.
448
00:27:36,756 --> 00:27:37,924
My house was destroyed.
449
00:27:37,957 --> 00:27:39,258
My dog was taken from me.
450
00:27:39,291 --> 00:27:39,959
Excuse me.
451
00:27:39,992 --> 00:27:42,628
Ms... yeah, Ms. Levin?
452
00:27:42,661 --> 00:27:44,496
Ms. Levin.
453
00:27:44,530 --> 00:27:45,832
Congratulations.
454
00:27:45,865 --> 00:27:47,446
That was some impressive
rhetorical gymnastics.
455
00:27:47,466 --> 00:27:50,536
I'm a world-class BS-er, but,
hey, you got God for a client.
456
00:27:50,569 --> 00:27:53,039
I mean, you must be feeling
pretty good about that.
457
00:27:53,072 --> 00:27:55,607
Do you even believe
in God, Mr. Frank?
458
00:27:55,641 --> 00:27:56,675
I'm suing him, aren't I?
459
00:27:56,709 --> 00:27:57,810
Yeah.
460
00:27:57,844 --> 00:27:59,311
But the question is, why?
461
00:27:59,345 --> 00:28:00,146
Hm.
462
00:28:00,179 --> 00:28:00,713
Why?
463
00:28:00,747 --> 00:28:01,881
What did He tell you?
464
00:28:01,914 --> 00:28:02,782
Mm.
465
00:28:02,815 --> 00:28:03,916
Sorry.
466
00:28:03,950 --> 00:28:05,522
That's attorney-client privilege.
467
00:28:17,396 --> 00:28:20,299
Does God exist?
468
00:28:20,332 --> 00:28:21,167
Yes.
469
00:28:21,200 --> 00:28:23,569
He most certainly does.
470
00:28:23,602 --> 00:28:25,004
How do you know?
471
00:28:25,037 --> 00:28:28,374
I know because I have
felt His love and grandeur
472
00:28:28,407 --> 00:28:29,675
in my own life.
473
00:28:29,708 --> 00:28:31,210
Really?
474
00:28:31,243 --> 00:28:32,411
How?
475
00:28:32,444 --> 00:28:34,847
Did God ever rain out a
ball game you were losing
476
00:28:34,881 --> 00:28:36,515
or pick up a check for lunch?
477
00:28:36,548 --> 00:28:37,683
Objection.
478
00:28:37,716 --> 00:28:38,998
This line of questioning
is immaterial, irreverent,
479
00:28:39,018 --> 00:28:40,352
and frankly, it's insulting.
480
00:28:40,386 --> 00:28:44,323
I'm simply trying to
establish God's existence.
481
00:28:44,356 --> 00:28:46,558
The heavens declare the glory of God.
482
00:28:49,228 --> 00:28:54,200
And the skies declare
the work of His hands.
483
00:28:54,233 --> 00:28:58,838
Proof of the existence of God
is all around us, Mr. Frank,
484
00:28:58,871 --> 00:29:00,807
if we choose to see it.
485
00:29:00,840 --> 00:29:02,321
Because faith in God is not a blind
486
00:29:02,341 --> 00:29:07,213
leap into the dark but a safe
step into a well-lit room.
487
00:29:14,120 --> 00:29:15,320
No evidence.
488
00:29:17,589 --> 00:29:22,929
So if God does exist, what's
He so pissed off about?
489
00:29:22,962 --> 00:29:25,131
Mr. Frank, we aren't
here to exercise
490
00:29:25,164 --> 00:29:26,779
your personal antipathy towards God.
491
00:29:26,799 --> 00:29:29,081
So if we could just stick
to the facts of the case,
492
00:29:29,101 --> 00:29:30,970
keep the heresy to a minimum.
493
00:29:33,439 --> 00:29:35,187
Where was God on the night in question?
494
00:29:35,207 --> 00:29:38,544
Was He, in fact, in the vicinity
of the 3500 block, Bristol
495
00:29:38,577 --> 00:29:39,511
Lane, Altamonte Springs?
496
00:29:39,545 --> 00:29:41,160
Because I will produce witnesses that
497
00:29:41,180 --> 00:29:42,862
place the defendant at the scene and will
498
00:29:42,882 --> 00:29:46,752
testify that He was, in fact,
behind the tornado, which
499
00:29:46,785 --> 00:29:48,587
destroyed my house.
500
00:29:48,620 --> 00:29:50,857
I don't know if God
brought your house down.
501
00:29:50,890 --> 00:29:52,491
I know He's all powerful, yes.
502
00:29:52,524 --> 00:29:55,227
But does He micro-manage the weather?
503
00:29:55,261 --> 00:29:58,430
Judaism doesn't really concern
itself with such things.
504
00:29:58,464 --> 00:30:02,468
We believe in the word of
God, the Torah, in fact.
505
00:30:02,501 --> 00:30:04,350
One doesn't even have to believe in God
506
00:30:04,370 --> 00:30:08,975
to be a Jew as long as
he follows God's law.
507
00:30:09,008 --> 00:30:12,945
So you can deny God and still be a Jew?
508
00:30:12,979 --> 00:30:20,979
Well, maybe not really
a Jew, but "Jew-ish."
509
00:30:22,088 --> 00:30:25,491
Did Allah destroy my house?
510
00:30:25,524 --> 00:30:28,660
A tornado destroyed your house.
511
00:30:28,694 --> 00:30:31,797
Sadly, Allah did not spare you.
512
00:30:31,830 --> 00:30:33,532
Perhaps if you were to demonstrate
513
00:30:33,565 --> 00:30:36,668
a little more respect for His word,
514
00:30:36,702 --> 00:30:42,108
His divine love would shine
upon you in the future.
515
00:30:42,141 --> 00:30:46,012
So if I just follow the Quran, my house
516
00:30:46,045 --> 00:30:47,713
would still be standing.
517
00:30:47,746 --> 00:30:48,946
Couldn't hurt.
518
00:30:51,717 --> 00:30:52,917
No further questions.
519
00:30:55,421 --> 00:30:58,190
Seriously, what is the point here?
520
00:30:58,224 --> 00:31:01,460
Point is I'm building my
case against God, seriously.
521
00:31:01,493 --> 00:31:04,563
Your subpoena list includes
the Dalai Lama and the pope.
522
00:31:04,596 --> 00:31:06,345
How am I supposed to take that seriously?
523
00:31:06,365 --> 00:31:08,414
The closer I get to
God, the stronger my case.
524
00:31:08,434 --> 00:31:10,849
And what do you expect to
find in all this searching?
525
00:31:10,869 --> 00:31:14,941
I guess that's why they
call this process discovery.
526
00:31:14,974 --> 00:31:16,542
What are you really after?
527
00:31:16,575 --> 00:31:18,790
I just want someone to pay for
my house, some accountability.
528
00:31:18,810 --> 00:31:19,611
Uh-uh.
529
00:31:19,645 --> 00:31:20,379
There's more.
530
00:31:20,412 --> 00:31:20,812
Nope.
531
00:31:20,846 --> 00:31:21,780
Sorry.
532
00:31:21,813 --> 00:31:23,115
It ain't that deep.
533
00:31:23,149 --> 00:31:24,250
It's just about the money.
534
00:31:24,283 --> 00:31:25,597
I'm actually pretty shallow.
535
00:31:25,617 --> 00:31:26,618
Really?
536
00:31:26,652 --> 00:31:28,300
So then it wasn't an act of integrity
537
00:31:28,320 --> 00:31:29,969
that caused a successful
attorney to quit practicing law
538
00:31:29,989 --> 00:31:30,789
three years ago?
539
00:31:30,822 --> 00:31:31,523
No.
540
00:31:31,557 --> 00:31:32,871
It was not an act of integrity.
541
00:31:32,891 --> 00:31:34,460
I had mine surgically removed.
542
00:31:34,493 --> 00:31:35,094
Really?
543
00:31:35,127 --> 00:31:36,028
Yeah.
544
00:31:36,062 --> 00:31:37,129
I had to go to Sweden for the operation,
545
00:31:37,163 --> 00:31:39,145
but I found it made me a
much more effective lawyer.
546
00:31:39,165 --> 00:31:39,865
You should try it.
547
00:31:39,898 --> 00:31:40,967
I can get you the number.
548
00:31:41,000 --> 00:31:41,667
No, thank you.
549
00:31:41,700 --> 00:31:42,801
I'm quite fond of mine.
550
00:31:42,834 --> 00:31:44,971
Yeah, well, I guess
if you're God's lawyer,
551
00:31:45,004 --> 00:31:46,538
it's probably a nice accessory.
552
00:31:46,572 --> 00:31:48,507
Yes, it does come in handy, you
553
00:31:48,540 --> 00:31:51,477
know, using my powers
for good instead of evil.
554
00:31:51,510 --> 00:31:52,979
You know, you should try it.
555
00:31:53,012 --> 00:31:54,480
I can get you the number.
556
00:31:54,513 --> 00:31:58,517
Thanks, but, uh, like
I said, I'm shallow.
557
00:31:58,550 --> 00:32:00,967
I used to think that money
would buy me happiness.
558
00:32:00,987 --> 00:32:02,788
You mean you don't care about money?
559
00:32:02,821 --> 00:32:04,103
What kind of lawyer are you?
560
00:32:04,123 --> 00:32:05,323
Retired.
561
00:32:10,596 --> 00:32:14,300
Can you tell me, what is an act of God?
562
00:32:14,333 --> 00:32:16,748
Well, "act of God" has been
common insurance-industry
563
00:32:16,768 --> 00:32:18,137
parlance for centuries.
564
00:32:18,170 --> 00:32:19,885
And what falls under that
clause is, of course,
565
00:32:19,905 --> 00:32:21,191
decided by the underwriter.
566
00:32:23,575 --> 00:32:26,778
Does God have any say in
what horrible atrocities
567
00:32:26,812 --> 00:32:28,714
are ascribed to Him?
568
00:32:28,747 --> 00:32:30,662
I decline to answer
any questions pertaining
569
00:32:30,682 --> 00:32:32,951
to the Almighty, aka God, or anything
570
00:32:32,985 --> 00:32:36,788
of a religious, theological,
or philosophical nature.
571
00:32:36,822 --> 00:32:40,126
Invoking God's actions
in a legal contract,
572
00:32:40,159 --> 00:32:43,795
uh, kind of brings up theology.
573
00:32:43,829 --> 00:32:47,166
I'm not qualified to comment on that.
574
00:32:47,199 --> 00:32:49,735
Perhaps you lawyer would care to comment.
575
00:32:49,768 --> 00:32:51,903
I'm not the one being deposed here.
576
00:32:51,937 --> 00:32:54,306
Are you sure?
577
00:32:54,340 --> 00:32:55,674
Don't underestimate Frank.
578
00:32:55,707 --> 00:32:56,708
He's not a crackpot.
579
00:32:56,742 --> 00:32:58,944
He's a shrewd and worthy adversary.
580
00:32:58,977 --> 00:33:00,326
Well, I think I can handle it.
581
00:33:00,346 --> 00:33:01,080
No doubt.
582
00:33:01,113 --> 00:33:02,448
This is your domain.
583
00:33:02,481 --> 00:33:04,283
But you're gonna need some help.
584
00:33:04,316 --> 00:33:06,132
I've been authorized
to offer my assistance
585
00:33:06,152 --> 00:33:08,200
in affecting a quick
and decisive resolution
586
00:33:08,220 --> 00:33:09,755
to this matter.
587
00:33:09,788 --> 00:33:11,870
That's very generous, but
as you said, this is my turf.
588
00:33:11,890 --> 00:33:13,059
That's true.
589
00:33:13,092 --> 00:33:15,041
And it's also true this case
should have been tossed out
590
00:33:15,061 --> 00:33:15,761
at the first hearing.
591
00:33:15,794 --> 00:33:19,931
Yet here we are.
592
00:33:19,965 --> 00:33:21,100
Thank you.
593
00:33:21,133 --> 00:33:23,869
So, uh, what's your interest here?
594
00:33:23,902 --> 00:33:26,672
It's not the insurance
companies being sued.
595
00:33:26,705 --> 00:33:28,220
Let's just consider for a moment
596
00:33:28,240 --> 00:33:30,509
that Frank is successful with his suit.
597
00:33:30,542 --> 00:33:32,058
If your clients are deemed financially
598
00:33:32,078 --> 00:33:35,281
responsible for every act
of God around the global,
599
00:33:35,314 --> 00:33:38,484
the liability would be staggering.
600
00:33:38,517 --> 00:33:43,122
Where will they turn to recover
their debilitating losses?
601
00:33:43,155 --> 00:33:44,823
To God?
602
00:33:44,856 --> 00:33:46,392
Perhaps.
603
00:33:46,425 --> 00:33:49,235
But more than likely, people
turn to the insurance industry.
604
00:33:52,298 --> 00:33:53,899
I suggest we go on the offensive.
605
00:33:53,932 --> 00:33:56,468
We take him down before he's
able to spin this thing.
606
00:33:56,502 --> 00:33:58,917
I don't want to win this
by intimidation or character
607
00:33:58,937 --> 00:34:00,472
assassination.
608
00:34:00,506 --> 00:34:04,943
This man has had the audacity
to drag our Lord in the mud.
609
00:34:04,976 --> 00:34:07,093
I think it's only fair
he should have to stand
610
00:34:07,113 --> 00:34:08,352
a little scrutiny himself.
611
00:34:18,190 --> 00:34:19,325
Well.
612
00:34:19,358 --> 00:34:20,492
Look what the cat dragged in.
613
00:34:20,526 --> 00:34:23,095
Don't start with me, muchacho.
614
00:34:23,129 --> 00:34:25,697
Aren't you glad to see me?
615
00:34:25,731 --> 00:34:26,932
I guess.
616
00:34:26,965 --> 00:34:28,534
Is that the best you can do?
617
00:34:28,567 --> 00:34:30,102
Sincerity costs extra.
618
00:34:30,136 --> 00:34:31,336
Oh, get in here.
619
00:34:48,120 --> 00:34:51,357
Did God destroy my house?
620
00:34:51,390 --> 00:34:54,293
What God are we speaking of?
621
00:34:54,326 --> 00:34:58,964
Uh, the big one?
622
00:34:58,997 --> 00:35:00,132
The great spirit.
623
00:35:00,166 --> 00:35:01,433
Yeah, Him.
624
00:35:01,467 --> 00:35:05,204
The great spirit does not do tornadoes.
625
00:35:05,237 --> 00:35:07,873
Well, which... which God does tornadoes?
626
00:35:07,906 --> 00:35:10,942
Indians do not separate God and nature.
627
00:35:10,976 --> 00:35:13,812
Heno is the spirit of the wind.
628
00:35:13,845 --> 00:35:15,447
And he is the wind.
629
00:35:15,481 --> 00:35:18,016
You cannot sue the wind.
630
00:35:18,049 --> 00:35:19,651
His breath is a cleansing.
631
00:35:19,685 --> 00:35:23,054
He blows away the old to
make room for the new.
632
00:35:25,857 --> 00:35:30,929
Well, this Heno...
Maybe he's an accessory.
633
00:35:30,962 --> 00:35:32,531
You people.
634
00:35:32,564 --> 00:35:35,767
Always looking for someone to blame.
635
00:35:35,801 --> 00:35:36,835
Us people?
636
00:35:36,868 --> 00:35:38,068
Lawyers.
637
00:35:50,316 --> 00:35:53,919
You ever worry about
hubris, Mr. Frank?
638
00:35:53,952 --> 00:35:55,421
Hubris?
639
00:35:55,454 --> 00:35:57,256
You mean do I ever think I'm gonna
640
00:35:57,289 --> 00:35:58,670
get struck down or something?
641
00:36:04,162 --> 00:36:05,531
What else could He do to me?
642
00:36:17,743 --> 00:36:20,078
Mr. Frank, I think it
would behoove you to take
643
00:36:20,111 --> 00:36:21,913
this a little more seriously.
644
00:36:21,947 --> 00:36:24,883
What I'm about to share with
you is some very damaging
645
00:36:24,916 --> 00:36:26,218
intelligence.
646
00:36:26,252 --> 00:36:30,789
This hatchet, this... this
could cause some real damage.
647
00:36:30,822 --> 00:36:32,858
Hey, war paint.
648
00:36:32,891 --> 00:36:35,861
Check it out.
649
00:36:35,894 --> 00:36:39,831
Now, what did you want to tell me?
650
00:36:39,865 --> 00:36:42,934
You are, I believe, quite
familiar with a Ms. Gina
651
00:36:42,968 --> 00:36:47,138
Rodriguez, professional prostitute.
652
00:36:47,172 --> 00:36:47,973
What about her?
653
00:36:48,006 --> 00:36:48,674
Excuse me.
654
00:36:48,707 --> 00:36:50,075
I need to get some air.
655
00:37:13,665 --> 00:37:15,233
Good morning, everybody.
656
00:37:15,267 --> 00:37:16,835
Thanks for coming out.
657
00:37:16,868 --> 00:37:18,837
I'll be brief.
658
00:37:18,870 --> 00:37:21,540
Uh, when I embarked upon
this course of action,
659
00:37:21,573 --> 00:37:23,809
I always knew that I
would become a target,
660
00:37:23,842 --> 00:37:26,124
that all the skeletons in my
closet would be brought out.
661
00:37:26,144 --> 00:37:30,516
And believe me, I got lots
of skeletons in my closet.
662
00:37:30,549 --> 00:37:32,984
I'm the first to admit
that I am the last man
663
00:37:33,018 --> 00:37:35,421
with the moral authority
to challenge God.
664
00:37:35,454 --> 00:37:38,490
I am far from a virtuous man.
665
00:37:38,524 --> 00:37:42,394
I'm a corporate defense
attorney for Christ sakes.
666
00:37:42,428 --> 00:37:44,075
Definitely in the fast track to hell.
667
00:37:44,095 --> 00:37:48,367
I break most of the
commandments on a weekly basis.
668
00:37:48,400 --> 00:37:49,535
I like to drink.
669
00:37:49,568 --> 00:37:51,036
I occasionally smoke weed.
670
00:37:51,069 --> 00:37:55,607
And much like Jesus, I enjoy
the company of hookers.
671
00:37:55,641 --> 00:37:57,075
What's a hooker?
672
00:37:57,108 --> 00:37:57,809
Come on, honey.
673
00:37:57,843 --> 00:37:58,977
Let me fix you a sandwich.
674
00:37:59,010 --> 00:38:00,359
But I want to watch Uncle David.
675
00:38:00,379 --> 00:38:01,079
Oh, no, you don't.
676
00:38:01,112 --> 00:38:02,548
Come on.
677
00:38:02,581 --> 00:38:08,354
Recently certain revelations
about my personal life
678
00:38:08,387 --> 00:38:11,523
have left me no choice but to make
679
00:38:11,557 --> 00:38:13,224
the following announcement.
680
00:38:13,258 --> 00:38:21,258
So at this time, I would like
to... introduce my new partner
681
00:38:24,235 --> 00:38:28,907
and co-counsel in this
case, Ms. Gina Rodriguez.
682
00:38:28,940 --> 00:38:31,677
Ms. Rodriguez has
been gracious enough
683
00:38:31,710 --> 00:38:34,780
to take a sizable pay
cut from the $200 an hour
684
00:38:34,813 --> 00:38:37,749
she makes in a covered
profession to the $20 an hour
685
00:38:37,783 --> 00:38:39,851
I can pay her as my legal assistant.
686
00:38:39,885 --> 00:38:44,656
So let he who is without
sin cast the first stone.
687
00:38:48,760 --> 00:38:51,229
So what do you think?
688
00:38:51,262 --> 00:38:54,132
I think I smell a book deal.
689
00:39:05,477 --> 00:39:07,345
Are you awake?
690
00:39:07,379 --> 00:39:10,215
It's me.
691
00:39:10,248 --> 00:39:11,448
Your lawyer.
692
00:39:14,586 --> 00:39:16,435
I just... I want you to know that you've
693
00:39:16,455 --> 00:39:19,024
got nothing to worry about, OK?
694
00:39:19,057 --> 00:39:21,893
Gonna beat this rap.
695
00:39:21,927 --> 00:39:22,661
I mean, come on.
696
00:39:22,694 --> 00:39:25,531
It's a layup, right?
697
00:39:31,870 --> 00:39:36,442
OK, here's a confession for you.
698
00:39:41,580 --> 00:39:42,780
I'm nervous.
699
00:39:45,383 --> 00:39:51,289
God, please grant
me the serenity to accept
700
00:39:51,322 --> 00:39:55,060
the things I cannot change, the
courage to change the things I
701
00:39:55,093 --> 00:40:00,432
can, and the wisdom to
know the difference.
702
00:40:00,466 --> 00:40:01,666
Amen.
703
00:41:16,875 --> 00:41:19,310
You ready to tango with the big guy?
704
00:41:19,344 --> 00:41:21,513
Let's do this, hefe.
705
00:41:21,547 --> 00:41:24,816
And the Lord said, all who profane me
706
00:41:24,850 --> 00:41:28,554
shall be guilty of blasphemy.
707
00:41:28,587 --> 00:41:32,290
And thou shalt smite the blasphemer!
708
00:41:32,323 --> 00:41:34,259
Smite the blasphemer!
709
00:41:39,430 --> 00:41:41,366
Smite the blasphemer!
710
00:41:41,399 --> 00:41:42,868
Smite the blasphemer!
711
00:41:45,937 --> 00:41:46,738
I
712
00:41:46,772 --> 00:41:47,972
Rabbi Grossman.
713
00:41:51,309 --> 00:41:54,012
Let's be honest here.
714
00:41:54,045 --> 00:41:58,516
You think I'm a complete nut job, right?
715
00:41:58,550 --> 00:41:59,785
No, sir.
716
00:41:59,818 --> 00:42:01,853
May I remind you that you're under oath?
717
00:42:01,887 --> 00:42:08,026
I would characterize you
more as a lost, misguided soul.
718
00:42:08,059 --> 00:42:09,527
Well, that's very generous.
719
00:42:09,561 --> 00:42:11,496
But I think most people would find
720
00:42:11,529 --> 00:42:16,668
dragging God into a court
of law a little meshuga.
721
00:42:16,702 --> 00:42:19,504
After all, God makes laws.
722
00:42:19,537 --> 00:42:22,440
He doesn't follow them, right?
723
00:42:22,473 --> 00:42:26,144
When the Israelites fled from
Egypt in the great Exodus
724
00:42:26,177 --> 00:42:29,414
and God spared them by
parting the Red Sea,
725
00:42:29,447 --> 00:42:32,183
the Jewish people made
a Covenant with God.
726
00:42:32,217 --> 00:42:35,787
He would protect them, and they
would become His chosen people.
727
00:42:35,821 --> 00:42:38,990
There are volumes of
interpretation and midrash
728
00:42:39,024 --> 00:42:40,338
on the meaning of the Covenant.
729
00:42:40,358 --> 00:42:43,161
But yes, there is a
sacred Covenant with God.
730
00:42:43,194 --> 00:42:46,097
You are doubtless aware,
Rabbi, that in ancient Egypt,
731
00:42:46,131 --> 00:42:50,936
Covenant is a term used for
a legally binding contract.
732
00:42:50,969 --> 00:42:52,638
The Covenant with the Jewish people
733
00:42:52,671 --> 00:42:59,010
was God entering into a legal
contract with human beings.
734
00:42:59,044 --> 00:43:02,080
Well, you could characterize it that way,
735
00:43:02,113 --> 00:43:05,250
but I think that description diminishes
736
00:43:05,283 --> 00:43:09,187
the sanctity and the
magnitude of the Covenant.
737
00:43:09,220 --> 00:43:12,758
Well, far be it from me, a lone heretic,
738
00:43:12,791 --> 00:43:14,592
to be the one to bring God to trial.
739
00:43:14,626 --> 00:43:18,897
But right here in the good
old book of Joshua, Joshua
740
00:43:18,930 --> 00:43:21,366
himself, angry with the Hebrew people
741
00:43:21,399 --> 00:43:24,169
for their idolatrous
ways, convened a court
742
00:43:24,202 --> 00:43:26,471
and put the Covenant on trial.
743
00:43:26,504 --> 00:43:30,141
Joshua himself represented
God in the proceedings.
744
00:43:30,175 --> 00:43:31,790
And I'm sure I don't have to tell you
745
00:43:31,810 --> 00:43:33,211
who got schooled in that one.
746
00:43:33,244 --> 00:43:35,981
And so we see that even in the Bible,
747
00:43:36,014 --> 00:43:40,518
God can be held accountable
in a court of law.
748
00:43:49,260 --> 00:43:50,909
Would you please read
the back of this bill,
749
00:43:50,929 --> 00:43:52,197
tell us what it says?
750
00:43:54,499 --> 00:43:55,633
You mean "In God we trust?"
751
00:43:55,667 --> 00:43:56,935
Correct.
752
00:43:56,968 --> 00:43:58,249
Now, would you infer
from that inscription
753
00:43:58,269 --> 00:43:59,885
that the dollar that you're holding
754
00:43:59,905 --> 00:44:03,541
is backed by the full faith
and credit of God, that
755
00:44:03,574 --> 00:44:06,611
being legal tender, a legal
document, should the US
756
00:44:06,644 --> 00:44:10,048
Treasury fail, you would be
able to recover the value
757
00:44:10,081 --> 00:44:12,884
of that dollar from God?
758
00:44:12,918 --> 00:44:13,719
No, ma'am.
759
00:44:13,752 --> 00:44:15,286
No.
760
00:44:15,320 --> 00:44:16,935
So you're able to distinguish
rudimentary legal semantics
761
00:44:16,955 --> 00:44:19,991
without too much difficulty?
762
00:44:20,025 --> 00:44:21,225
That's correct.
763
00:44:23,561 --> 00:44:25,977
This is a copy of the
policy issued by your company
764
00:44:25,997 --> 00:44:27,365
to Mr. Frank.
765
00:44:27,398 --> 00:44:30,001
Can you kindly read the
highlighted section aloud?
766
00:44:30,035 --> 00:44:31,717
"Other damages due to
extraordinary weather
767
00:44:31,737 --> 00:44:35,006
conditions, such as cyclones,
tornadoes, fire storms,
768
00:44:35,040 --> 00:44:37,508
locusts, geysers, tidal
waves, and tsunamis
769
00:44:37,542 --> 00:44:40,145
will be deemed acts of God and explicitly
770
00:44:40,178 --> 00:44:41,880
not covered under said policy."
771
00:44:41,913 --> 00:44:42,781
Thank you.
772
00:44:42,814 --> 00:44:44,129
And would you please read the signature
773
00:44:44,149 --> 00:44:45,250
at the bottom of that page.
774
00:44:45,283 --> 00:44:47,052
Signed by Mr. Frank.
775
00:44:47,085 --> 00:44:48,286
No further questions.
776
00:44:48,319 --> 00:44:49,519
Thank you.
777
00:44:52,357 --> 00:44:54,993
Imam al Bakri, is it fair to say
778
00:44:55,026 --> 00:44:59,397
that there is nothing of
which Allah is not capable of?
779
00:44:59,430 --> 00:45:00,498
Allah is supreme, yes.
780
00:45:00,531 --> 00:45:01,867
Right.
781
00:45:01,900 --> 00:45:04,102
So hurricanes, tornadoes,
earthquakes... that's
782
00:45:04,135 --> 00:45:05,536
child's play for Him, right?
783
00:45:05,570 --> 00:45:08,573
I mean, He created the
whole universe in six days.
784
00:45:08,606 --> 00:45:09,806
So it is written.
785
00:45:12,277 --> 00:45:17,515
In sworn testimony, you
said that the destruction
786
00:45:17,548 --> 00:45:22,854
of my home, and I quote,
was "Allah's will"
787
00:45:22,888 --> 00:45:24,756
and that "He chose
not to spare me."
788
00:45:24,790 --> 00:45:25,690
Objection.
789
00:45:25,723 --> 00:45:26,972
Your Honor, the witness is speaking
790
00:45:26,992 --> 00:45:28,526
in religious generalities.
791
00:45:28,559 --> 00:45:32,197
He's in no way ascribing motive
or intent to the defendant.
792
00:45:32,230 --> 00:45:33,678
Where are you going with this?
793
00:45:33,698 --> 00:45:36,147
I'm simply demonstrating
that if God is all-knowing
794
00:45:36,167 --> 00:45:38,536
and all-powerful, then
the destruction of my home
795
00:45:38,569 --> 00:45:41,172
had to have either
been an act of His will
796
00:45:41,206 --> 00:45:44,575
or the result of divine neglect
since He had foreknowledge
797
00:45:44,609 --> 00:45:46,945
and the power to stop it,
which makes Him clearly
798
00:45:46,978 --> 00:45:49,948
culpable under Florida emissions statutes
799
00:45:49,981 --> 00:45:51,817
and good Samaritan precedence.
800
00:45:57,388 --> 00:46:02,360
Bishop Rossini, why do bad
things happen to good people?
801
00:46:05,296 --> 00:46:10,802
Well, to answer that one would
need to know the unknowable,
802
00:46:10,836 --> 00:46:13,304
the mind of God Himself.
803
00:46:13,338 --> 00:46:14,986
Sometimes the meaning of the tragedy
804
00:46:15,006 --> 00:46:17,075
can be difficult to comprehend.
805
00:46:17,108 --> 00:46:23,281
But if one has faith,
all things have meaning.
806
00:46:23,314 --> 00:46:25,884
But why would a loving God allow
807
00:46:25,917 --> 00:46:27,418
these tragedies to happen?
808
00:46:27,452 --> 00:46:31,957
Does the Lord, as Mr. Frank
suggests, want us to suffer?
809
00:46:38,864 --> 00:46:40,098
I asked for strength.
810
00:46:42,567 --> 00:46:47,105
And God gave me difficulties
to make me strong.
811
00:46:47,138 --> 00:46:49,507
I asked for wisdom.
812
00:46:49,540 --> 00:46:53,478
And God gave me problems to solve.
813
00:46:53,511 --> 00:46:55,881
I asked for courage.
814
00:46:55,914 --> 00:46:59,484
And God gave me dangers to overcome.
815
00:46:59,517 --> 00:47:01,319
I asked for love.
816
00:47:01,352 --> 00:47:03,688
And God gave me troubled people to help.
817
00:47:06,691 --> 00:47:09,995
My prayers were answered.
818
00:47:10,028 --> 00:47:14,665
And in your opinion, can we, in fact,
819
00:47:14,699 --> 00:47:20,105
hold God accountable for every
tragedy, every stubbed toe,
820
00:47:20,138 --> 00:47:21,572
every broken heart?
821
00:47:21,606 --> 00:47:25,476
Does God owe us justice?
822
00:47:29,647 --> 00:47:31,349
God is justice.
823
00:47:34,152 --> 00:47:35,753
No further questions.
824
00:47:35,786 --> 00:47:36,986
Thank you.
825
00:47:40,458 --> 00:47:44,262
Your Eminence, can
you tell us the mission
826
00:47:44,295 --> 00:47:46,297
of the Catholic Church?
827
00:47:46,331 --> 00:47:49,000
Well, I suppose broadly defined,
828
00:47:49,034 --> 00:47:50,768
it is to do the Lord's work.
829
00:47:50,801 --> 00:47:55,206
So saving souls,
alleviating human suffering,
830
00:47:55,240 --> 00:47:56,807
that sort of thing.
831
00:47:56,841 --> 00:48:02,914
Yes, Mr. Frank, that sort of
righteous and merciful thing.
832
00:48:02,948 --> 00:48:07,118
Bishop, do you have any idea
how much the Catholic Church's
833
00:48:07,152 --> 00:48:09,587
holdings are worth?
834
00:48:09,620 --> 00:48:11,856
No, I do not.
835
00:48:11,889 --> 00:48:13,891
Course you don't.
836
00:48:13,925 --> 00:48:15,093
No one does.
837
00:48:15,126 --> 00:48:17,095
The church's assets are so vast, so
838
00:48:17,128 --> 00:48:21,266
swathed in secrecy as to be incalculable.
839
00:48:21,299 --> 00:48:24,002
Yet reliable estimates
value the Vatican's holdings
840
00:48:24,035 --> 00:48:26,904
at being greater than
the world's top five
841
00:48:26,938 --> 00:48:28,439
corporations combined.
842
00:48:28,473 --> 00:48:30,455
But of course, we'll never
know, because the Vatican is not
843
00:48:30,475 --> 00:48:32,543
required to disclose any of its assets
844
00:48:32,577 --> 00:48:35,113
or pay a penny of taxes
anywhere in the world.
845
00:48:35,146 --> 00:48:36,514
Objection.
846
00:48:36,547 --> 00:48:38,029
Your Honor, Mr. Frank is
antagonizing the witness.
847
00:48:38,049 --> 00:48:39,330
The church is not on trial here.
848
00:48:39,350 --> 00:48:41,586
Is there a point
to this, Mr. Frank?
849
00:48:41,619 --> 00:48:45,156
All I'm saying is if the
Vatican is God's house,
850
00:48:45,190 --> 00:48:47,143
then he sure as hell
can pay for my house!
851
00:48:47,959 --> 00:48:49,160
He done the wrath.
852
00:48:49,194 --> 00:48:50,394
He can do the math.
853
00:48:55,133 --> 00:48:56,333
Order.
854
00:48:58,336 --> 00:49:00,785
He's coming on a little
bit stronger than expected.
855
00:49:00,805 --> 00:49:03,374
But his arguments are
legally spurious at best.
856
00:49:03,408 --> 00:49:05,977
And when I present my
case, I will bury him.
857
00:49:06,011 --> 00:49:08,246
It may be too late by that point.
858
00:49:08,279 --> 00:49:09,514
How do you mean?
859
00:49:09,547 --> 00:49:11,229
I just mean the man's becoming popular.
860
00:49:11,249 --> 00:49:14,119
We need to put a stop to this right now.
861
00:49:14,152 --> 00:49:17,355
And how do you propose we do that?
862
00:49:17,388 --> 00:49:20,658
By appealing to Mr.
Frank's baser instincts.
863
00:49:24,029 --> 00:49:25,229
Moo shu pork?
864
00:49:38,776 --> 00:49:40,011
Ms. Levin.
865
00:49:40,045 --> 00:49:41,245
Please come in.
866
00:49:44,749 --> 00:49:47,618
Mr. Frank?
867
00:49:47,652 --> 00:49:49,820
Your 9:30's here.
868
00:49:49,854 --> 00:49:51,089
Huh?
869
00:49:51,122 --> 00:49:53,458
Shall I have Ms. Levin wait?
870
00:49:57,395 --> 00:50:00,165
So do you always work Saturdays?
871
00:50:00,198 --> 00:50:01,399
Isn't this the sabbath?
872
00:50:01,432 --> 00:50:03,048
Ah, well, I figure He'll forgive me.
873
00:50:03,068 --> 00:50:04,702
I'm working for Him, after all.
874
00:50:04,735 --> 00:50:07,838
Well, he's lucky to
have such devoted counsel.
875
00:50:07,872 --> 00:50:10,608
There's nothing like being
able to really believe
876
00:50:10,641 --> 00:50:13,010
in your client.
877
00:50:13,044 --> 00:50:14,279
What's that like?
878
00:50:14,312 --> 00:50:15,826
Mr. Frank, I have
to give you credit.
879
00:50:15,846 --> 00:50:18,383
You have prosecuted this
case very creatively.
880
00:50:18,416 --> 00:50:21,018
But do you really think
you can win this thing?
881
00:50:21,052 --> 00:50:22,387
Well, I don't know.
882
00:50:22,420 --> 00:50:25,290
I mean, I may be a hopeless sinner,
883
00:50:25,323 --> 00:50:27,192
but I do believe in miracles.
884
00:50:27,225 --> 00:50:30,595
And if Jesus can walk on water, why
885
00:50:30,628 --> 00:50:36,334
can't I extract a little justice
from the Florida legal system?
886
00:50:36,367 --> 00:50:39,537
Well, you know, it's not
too late to drop the suit,
887
00:50:39,570 --> 00:50:43,674
claim moral victory, and walk
away with your dignity intact.
888
00:50:43,708 --> 00:50:47,278
Do I look like a guy who
gives a damn about dignity?
889
00:50:47,312 --> 00:50:50,315
Look, that tornado not
only took my house,
890
00:50:50,348 --> 00:50:53,351
it also took my dog,
my poor, noble Brutus,
891
00:50:53,384 --> 00:50:56,221
who pathetically was the
only true companionship
892
00:50:56,254 --> 00:50:57,855
I had left in this world.
893
00:50:57,888 --> 00:50:59,056
And someone's gonna pay.
894
00:50:59,090 --> 00:51:00,625
And I think I smell fear.
895
00:51:00,658 --> 00:51:05,230
So give me one good reason
why I should just walk away.
896
00:51:08,333 --> 00:51:09,762
How about 3 million reasons?
897
00:51:12,403 --> 00:51:14,519
We would demand an immediate
release of liability
898
00:51:14,539 --> 00:51:18,743
and force a gag order.
899
00:51:18,776 --> 00:51:21,279
$3 million buys a lot
of house, Mr. Frank.
900
00:51:21,312 --> 00:51:26,151
So God's just trying
901
00:51:26,184 --> 00:51:29,120
to buy me off and shut me up.
902
00:51:29,154 --> 00:51:30,354
Sadly, yes.
903
00:51:36,627 --> 00:51:37,962
Well?
904
00:51:37,995 --> 00:51:39,424
What should I tell my clients?
905
00:52:15,633 --> 00:52:17,202
Three million bucks?
906
00:52:17,235 --> 00:52:18,803
How dare you?
907
00:52:18,836 --> 00:52:24,008
You go back and tell God that
my integrity is not for sale.
908
00:52:24,041 --> 00:52:27,678
I thought you had it surgically removed.
909
00:52:27,712 --> 00:52:30,315
So did I.
910
00:52:30,348 --> 00:52:33,050
Are you crazy?
911
00:52:33,083 --> 00:52:33,884
Don't answer that.
912
00:52:33,918 --> 00:52:35,320
It's rhetorical.
913
00:52:35,353 --> 00:52:36,801
It's not just about the money.
914
00:52:36,821 --> 00:52:37,988
Oh, yeah?
915
00:52:38,022 --> 00:52:41,226
That's a pretty proud
stand for a homeless guy.
916
00:52:41,259 --> 00:52:43,007
Freedom's just another word for nothing
917
00:52:43,027 --> 00:52:44,028
left to lose, amigo.
918
00:52:44,061 --> 00:52:45,496
No.
919
00:52:45,530 --> 00:52:47,612
Destitute is another word
for nothing left to lose.
920
00:52:47,632 --> 00:52:49,467
And since when do you live your life
921
00:52:49,500 --> 00:52:51,469
based on old Bob Dylan songs?
922
00:52:51,502 --> 00:52:52,850
You just don't get it, man.
923
00:52:52,870 --> 00:52:53,471
No.
924
00:52:53,504 --> 00:52:54,605
I do get it.
925
00:52:54,639 --> 00:52:55,240
You won.
926
00:52:55,273 --> 00:52:56,073
Jackpot.
927
00:52:56,106 --> 00:52:56,974
Ca-ching.
928
00:52:57,007 --> 00:52:58,243
$3 million.
929
00:52:58,276 --> 00:53:00,711
Why can't you take yes for an answer?
930
00:53:04,349 --> 00:53:06,684
Kris Kristofferson.
931
00:53:06,717 --> 00:53:08,319
What?
932
00:53:08,353 --> 00:53:11,522
It was Kris Kristofferson
who wrote "Me and Bobby McGee."
933
00:53:11,556 --> 00:53:14,892
Although Janis Joplin
had a huge hit with it.
934
00:53:18,429 --> 00:53:20,298
Dude.
935
00:53:20,331 --> 00:53:23,167
God wants to settle with you.
936
00:53:23,200 --> 00:53:24,400
What more do you want?
937
00:53:38,449 --> 00:53:42,420
This should be about the spot.
938
00:53:42,453 --> 00:53:45,390
You sure?
939
00:53:45,423 --> 00:53:47,525
You say that every time.
940
00:54:36,974 --> 00:54:38,174
Next time.
941
00:54:43,748 --> 00:54:48,786
David, fighting with God
isn't gonna bring her back.
942
00:55:48,513 --> 00:55:54,284
But take comfort knowing that it is
943
00:55:54,318 --> 00:55:58,288
God's will.
944
00:55:58,322 --> 00:56:00,958
Maybe he's just angry at God.
945
00:56:00,991 --> 00:56:02,940
If he's willing to walk
away from $3 million,
946
00:56:02,960 --> 00:56:04,595
then he's obviously less mercenary
947
00:56:04,629 --> 00:56:05,796
than we gave him credit for.
948
00:56:05,830 --> 00:56:07,698
Or craves attention more than money.
949
00:56:07,732 --> 00:56:10,134
Either way, he is not going to go away.
950
00:56:10,167 --> 00:56:12,770
Which means we must prevail in court.
951
00:56:12,803 --> 00:56:15,773
And you are certain
that you will prevail?
952
00:56:15,806 --> 00:56:18,909
I take my role as defender of
God very seriously, Mr. Krauss.
953
00:56:18,943 --> 00:56:21,812
And I have every
confidence we will prevail.
954
00:56:21,846 --> 00:56:23,414
Do you have a problem?
955
00:56:23,448 --> 00:56:26,917
It's just that so far, none
of the conventional strategies
956
00:56:26,951 --> 00:56:28,018
have worked.
957
00:56:28,052 --> 00:56:29,767
And I just feel that
the unorthodox nature
958
00:56:29,787 --> 00:56:32,389
of this litigation may require some more
959
00:56:32,423 --> 00:56:34,925
unorthodox legal strategies.
960
00:56:34,959 --> 00:56:38,395
What sort of strategies?
961
00:56:38,429 --> 00:56:44,502
Consider for a moment there is no God.
962
00:56:44,535 --> 00:56:45,903
I know.
963
00:56:45,936 --> 00:56:48,539
But think about it, not as
an existential question,
964
00:56:48,573 --> 00:56:49,940
but as a game-changer.
965
00:56:49,974 --> 00:56:53,143
The issue is no longer
did God destroy his house,
966
00:56:53,177 --> 00:56:56,280
but is there a God at all,
shifting the burden of proof
967
00:56:56,313 --> 00:56:57,682
on to Mr. Frank.
968
00:56:57,715 --> 00:56:59,584
And as you gentlemen are well aware,
969
00:56:59,617 --> 00:57:01,752
proving the existence of God is...
970
00:57:01,786 --> 00:57:04,855
Forgive me... quite impossible.
971
00:57:04,889 --> 00:57:06,757
That's very
clever, Mr. Krauss.
972
00:57:06,791 --> 00:57:10,127
And while we appreciate the
boldness of such a strategy,
973
00:57:10,160 --> 00:57:13,664
I don't think denying the Lord is for us.
974
00:57:13,698 --> 00:57:14,532
I understand that.
975
00:57:14,565 --> 00:57:15,432
No.
976
00:57:15,466 --> 00:57:17,201
I don't think you do.
977
00:57:17,234 --> 00:57:20,304
We answer to a higher
law, Mr. Krauss.
978
00:57:20,337 --> 00:57:26,010
And if we deny the Lord to win,
then we've lost everything.
979
00:57:26,043 --> 00:57:30,447
So, we'll take our chance in court.
980
00:57:30,481 --> 00:57:34,585
After all, God is on our side.
981
00:57:40,491 --> 00:57:42,693
Why are you lying to them?
982
00:57:42,727 --> 00:57:44,361
Excuse me?
983
00:57:44,394 --> 00:57:47,832
You don't actually believe
you're gonna win this, do you?
984
00:57:47,865 --> 00:57:49,346
You know, for God's co-counsel,
985
00:57:49,366 --> 00:57:50,681
you sure don't have much faith.
986
00:57:50,701 --> 00:57:52,236
My faith isn't the issue here.
987
00:57:52,269 --> 00:57:53,137
Thank God for that.
988
00:57:53,170 --> 00:57:54,539
Are you atheism?
989
00:57:54,572 --> 00:57:57,254
I simply want to win, which
makes me wonder what exactly it
990
00:57:57,274 --> 00:57:58,475
is you want.
991
00:57:58,509 --> 00:58:00,257
You know, this might be hard
for you to understand, Carl,
992
00:58:00,277 --> 00:58:02,026
but this has everything to do with faith.
993
00:58:02,046 --> 00:58:03,548
Oh, yeah.
994
00:58:03,581 --> 00:58:05,149
I know.
995
00:58:05,182 --> 00:58:07,598
You suddenly got real religious
after that Breslin case
996
00:58:07,618 --> 00:58:09,053
a few years, didn't you?
997
00:58:13,724 --> 00:58:15,225
Is there a point here?
998
00:58:15,259 --> 00:58:17,508
The point is this isn't
about your personal atonement,
999
00:58:17,528 --> 00:58:18,763
sweetheart.
1000
00:58:18,796 --> 00:58:20,578
It's about money,
potentially a great deal
1001
00:58:20,598 --> 00:58:21,899
of my client's money.
1002
00:58:21,932 --> 00:58:24,635
So instead of exorcising
your personal demons,
1003
00:58:24,669 --> 00:58:26,216
you better start doing what you need
1004
00:58:26,236 --> 00:58:29,907
to do to quash this thing now
or else get out of the way.
1005
00:58:48,993 --> 00:58:50,875
I guess we always knew
this day was coming,
1006
00:58:50,895 --> 00:58:56,466
but... but we keep praying
for a miracle, you know?
1007
00:59:02,039 --> 00:59:03,641
Oh yeah, that's right.
1008
00:59:03,674 --> 00:59:05,576
I forgot you don't believe in prayers.
1009
00:59:05,610 --> 00:59:06,844
Hey.
1010
00:59:06,877 --> 00:59:08,926
You know, here I am praying
for the life of my baby girl,
1011
00:59:08,946 --> 00:59:10,527
and you're out there on TV mocking Him!
1012
00:59:10,547 --> 00:59:11,929
That has nothing to do with...
1013
00:59:11,949 --> 00:59:13,050
How do you know?
1014
00:59:13,083 --> 00:59:14,799
What if it has everything
to do with this?
1015
00:59:14,819 --> 00:59:16,100
Did you ever think about that, brother?
1016
00:59:16,120 --> 00:59:16,386
Billy.
1017
00:59:16,420 --> 00:59:17,021
Huh?
1018
00:59:17,054 --> 00:59:17,788
Hey, don't do this.
1019
00:59:17,822 --> 00:59:18,422
Don't do this.
1020
00:59:18,455 --> 00:59:19,023
Sh.
1021
00:59:19,056 --> 00:59:19,890
Sh.
1022
00:59:19,924 --> 00:59:20,524
You know there's nothing I wouldn't
1023
00:59:20,557 --> 00:59:22,292
do for that little girl.
1024
00:59:52,189 --> 00:59:55,259
Please, God, have mercy on me.
1025
00:59:59,864 --> 01:00:01,064
Give me strength.
1026
01:00:07,838 --> 01:00:09,038
I'm scared.
1027
01:00:11,575 --> 01:00:17,181
I'm afraid that I'm
unworthy of the faith that's
1028
01:00:17,214 --> 01:00:18,414
been put in me.
1029
01:00:21,318 --> 01:00:22,518
Please.
1030
01:00:28,325 --> 01:00:30,995
Help me understand why I feel so alone.
1031
01:00:50,715 --> 01:00:52,950
How you doing, big guy?
1032
01:00:52,983 --> 01:00:54,785
Bet you're surprised to see me, huh?
1033
01:00:54,819 --> 01:00:58,155
Yeah, well, that makes two of us.
1034
01:01:01,258 --> 01:01:04,962
Look, I don't really know
how this works, but, uh, I
1035
01:01:04,995 --> 01:01:06,396
read your book, though.
1036
01:01:06,430 --> 01:01:07,630
It was good.
1037
01:01:09,734 --> 01:01:15,272
Look, I... I know I'm the last
guy to be asking any favors,
1038
01:01:15,305 --> 01:01:23,305
but if you are up there,
please, please help little Lucy.
1039
01:01:25,349 --> 01:01:33,349
But if you are up there,
please, please help little Lucy.
1040
01:01:34,892 --> 01:01:35,893
I'll do anything.
1041
01:01:35,926 --> 01:01:39,029
I'll... I'll join a monastery.
1042
01:01:39,063 --> 01:01:42,132
I'll... I'll do charity work for lepers.
1043
01:01:44,401 --> 01:01:45,202
Wait.
1044
01:01:45,235 --> 01:01:47,537
Do lepers even exist anymore?
1045
01:01:47,571 --> 01:01:48,538
Whatever.
1046
01:01:48,572 --> 01:01:50,440
My ass is yours.
1047
01:01:54,478 --> 01:01:55,980
I'm begging here.
1048
01:02:00,450 --> 01:02:02,486
Do you believe
in God, Mr. Frank?
1049
01:02:06,190 --> 01:02:08,192
Is this an essay question?
1050
01:02:08,225 --> 01:02:11,261
No, it's a yes or no question.
1051
01:02:11,295 --> 01:02:13,063
Do you believe in God or don't you?
1052
01:02:20,037 --> 01:02:28,037
I believe if God does
exist He could totally
1053
01:02:30,280 --> 01:02:33,818
kick Superman's ass in a fight.
1054
01:02:33,851 --> 01:02:35,119
Funny.
1055
01:02:35,152 --> 01:02:39,056
Seems that you find
God and religious faith
1056
01:02:39,089 --> 01:02:41,525
a source of great amusement.
1057
01:02:41,558 --> 01:02:45,429
Is this all just a big
joke to you, Mr. Frank?
1058
01:02:45,462 --> 01:02:47,945
Actually, I don't... I don't
think this is funny at all.
1059
01:02:47,965 --> 01:02:48,765
Right.
1060
01:02:48,799 --> 01:02:50,380
But here you are suing God, an entity
1061
01:02:50,400 --> 01:02:52,369
whom you don't appear to believe exists.
1062
01:02:52,402 --> 01:02:54,671
Some might consider this
suit a cynical attempt
1063
01:02:54,704 --> 01:02:57,574
to extort money from these
religious groups, money that
1064
01:02:57,607 --> 01:03:00,610
would otherwise be spent
helping the truly needy instead
1065
01:03:00,644 --> 01:03:03,013
of rebuilding the estates
of high-priced attorneys
1066
01:03:03,047 --> 01:03:04,247
like yourself.
1067
01:03:09,353 --> 01:03:12,156
Do you believe in anything
at all, Mr. Frank?
1068
01:03:15,692 --> 01:03:22,132
I believe that good digestion is the key
1069
01:03:22,166 --> 01:03:23,366
to health and happiness.
1070
01:03:26,570 --> 01:03:29,019
I believe that the Clash is
the greatest rock and roll
1071
01:03:29,039 --> 01:03:31,876
band ever.
1072
01:03:31,909 --> 01:03:37,547
I believe in the laws of physics
and that Einstein's theory
1073
01:03:37,581 --> 01:03:39,749
of relativity is the single greatest
1074
01:03:39,783 --> 01:03:43,353
insight of the 20th century.
1075
01:03:43,387 --> 01:03:45,956
I believe with the... the
right defensive line,
1076
01:03:45,990 --> 01:03:47,925
the Buccaneers could go all the way,
1077
01:03:47,958 --> 01:03:49,606
and the disparity between the salaries
1078
01:03:49,626 --> 01:03:52,462
of professional athletes
and public school teachers
1079
01:03:52,496 --> 01:03:53,931
is obscene.
1080
01:03:53,964 --> 01:03:58,202
I believe money doesn't buy happiness,
1081
01:03:58,235 --> 01:04:00,704
but it does buy freedom.
1082
01:04:00,737 --> 01:04:02,806
I believe in buying and holding companies
1083
01:04:02,839 --> 01:04:04,841
with solid fundamentals.
1084
01:04:04,875 --> 01:04:06,843
I believe in brushing before bedtime.
1085
01:04:06,877 --> 01:04:10,780
I believe in ghosts but not
UFOs, crop circles and Bigfoot.
1086
01:04:10,814 --> 01:04:14,851
And I believe the greatest
evidence of divine providence
1087
01:04:14,885 --> 01:04:16,853
is the gift of being able to truly,
1088
01:04:16,887 --> 01:04:23,060
selflessly, and tenaciously
love another human being.
1089
01:04:23,093 --> 01:04:25,029
You still haven't answered my question.
1090
01:04:25,062 --> 01:04:26,476
Perhaps I don't understand the question.
1091
01:04:26,496 --> 01:04:28,445
Then again, maybe you don't
understand the question.
1092
01:04:28,465 --> 01:04:30,367
The question is, how can you blame God
1093
01:04:30,400 --> 01:04:33,003
for destroying your
home when you don't even
1094
01:04:33,037 --> 01:04:36,173
believe that He exists?
1095
01:04:36,206 --> 01:04:38,275
I don't know if He exists or not.
1096
01:04:38,308 --> 01:04:40,610
You know, maybe I'm faith-challenged.
1097
01:04:40,644 --> 01:04:45,782
But if He does exist, yeah, I blame Him.
1098
01:04:45,815 --> 01:04:47,617
I blame Him for everything.
1099
01:04:47,651 --> 01:04:50,387
I blame Him for my house, for my dog,
1100
01:04:50,420 --> 01:04:53,323
for letting innocent
children suffer and die.
1101
01:04:53,357 --> 01:04:56,360
I blame Him for all the horrible
tragedies in this stinking
1102
01:04:56,393 --> 01:05:00,364
world He created, for all
the war and atrocities,
1103
01:05:00,397 --> 01:05:03,267
for all the killing and
death done in His name.
1104
01:05:03,300 --> 01:05:06,536
And I'm sick and tired of
people making excuses for Him,
1105
01:05:06,570 --> 01:05:09,506
thinking He is always righteous and there
1106
01:05:09,539 --> 01:05:12,309
has to be a purpose behind
every horrible tragedy.
1107
01:05:12,342 --> 01:05:15,145
I'm sorry, but bad things
happen to good people,
1108
01:05:15,179 --> 01:05:16,751
good things happen to bad people,
1109
01:05:16,780 --> 01:05:18,949
and horrible things
happen to innocent people.
1110
01:05:18,983 --> 01:05:21,818
Shit happens.
1111
01:05:21,851 --> 01:05:26,290
And I don't know how to
find any meaning in it.
1112
01:05:26,323 --> 01:05:28,625
So I'm left with two choices.
1113
01:05:28,658 --> 01:05:33,730
Either God is cruel, or He doesn't exist.
1114
01:05:36,766 --> 01:05:44,766
And quite frankly, most of the
time, it is a hell of a lot
1115
01:05:45,309 --> 01:05:48,812
easier to believe the latter.
1116
01:05:48,845 --> 01:05:51,181
That, of course the
emotional testimony today
1117
01:05:51,215 --> 01:05:53,650
from David Frank's lawsuit against God,
1118
01:05:53,683 --> 01:05:55,885
a trial that's garnered
national attention
1119
01:05:55,919 --> 01:05:57,287
and triggered heated debate.
1120
01:05:57,321 --> 01:05:58,735
And while Mr. Frank
is becoming sort
1121
01:05:58,755 --> 01:06:01,992
of a spokesman for a lot
of disenfranchised people,
1122
01:06:02,026 --> 01:06:03,893
he has also inflamed a lot of anger,
1123
01:06:03,927 --> 01:06:07,197
especially among evangelical
Christians and others who
1124
01:06:07,231 --> 01:06:08,645
have been very vocal in their...
1125
01:06:08,665 --> 01:06:10,534
Spokesman for the disenfranchised.
1126
01:06:10,567 --> 01:06:12,749
This clown's turning my
courtroom into a circus.
1127
01:06:12,769 --> 01:06:14,838
That's why you need to stop this now.
1128
01:06:14,871 --> 01:06:17,674
I can't just stop a
trial, Luis, especially one
1129
01:06:17,707 --> 01:06:18,642
as high profile as this.
1130
01:06:18,675 --> 01:06:20,457
And may I remind you
that you are the one who
1131
01:06:20,477 --> 01:06:21,611
advised me to hear this case?
1132
01:06:21,645 --> 01:06:23,455
And now I'm advising you to kill this
1133
01:06:23,480 --> 01:06:25,115
before it gets to the jury.
1134
01:06:25,149 --> 01:06:26,816
If Frank prevails, you will forever
1135
01:06:26,850 --> 01:06:30,220
be known as the liberal
judge who ruled against God.
1136
01:06:30,254 --> 01:06:31,969
You wouldn't be elected dog catcher.
1137
01:06:34,591 --> 01:06:36,673
The defense has raised
the issue of jurisdiction.
1138
01:06:36,693 --> 01:06:38,642
The court has reviewed
the issue and concluded
1139
01:06:38,662 --> 01:06:40,830
that while, in fact, it
does have jurisdiction
1140
01:06:40,864 --> 01:06:43,767
over the action at hand, it
may lack personal jurisdiction
1141
01:06:43,800 --> 01:06:46,670
over the primary defendant, God Almighty.
1142
01:06:46,703 --> 01:06:48,672
And since the defendant is not present,
1143
01:06:48,705 --> 01:06:50,287
is not known to make Seminole County
1144
01:06:50,307 --> 01:06:53,577
his primary business
location, I have no choice
1145
01:06:53,610 --> 01:06:56,280
but to restrict the
arguments to those addressing
1146
01:06:56,313 --> 01:06:58,148
the defendants present.
1147
01:06:58,182 --> 01:07:00,850
Any and all references
to God and His actions
1148
01:07:00,884 --> 01:07:02,452
will be excluded.
1149
01:07:02,486 --> 01:07:05,989
The jury is now instructed to
disregard all such references.
1150
01:07:06,022 --> 01:07:08,325
Your Honor, with all due respect,
1151
01:07:08,358 --> 01:07:10,994
how am I supposed to
conduct a suit against God
1152
01:07:11,027 --> 01:07:12,596
without referencing God?
1153
01:07:12,629 --> 01:07:15,212
Mr. Frank, this court has
given you a tremendous amount
1154
01:07:15,232 --> 01:07:16,866
of latitude in prosecuting God.
1155
01:07:16,900 --> 01:07:19,183
But if the accused is not
present to defend Himself,
1156
01:07:19,203 --> 01:07:22,572
this court will simply not allow
Him to be party to this suit.
1157
01:07:22,606 --> 01:07:25,275
So what do you want, a burning bush?
1158
01:07:25,309 --> 01:07:26,876
Save it for appeal.
1159
01:07:26,910 --> 01:07:28,878
Why are you doing this?
1160
01:07:29,879 --> 01:07:30,814
Order.
1161
01:07:30,847 --> 01:07:32,015
Why are you doing this?
1162
01:07:32,048 --> 01:07:33,248
Order.
1163
01:07:35,519 --> 01:07:37,954
Man, I am screwed.
1164
01:07:37,987 --> 01:07:40,090
Without God, I got nothing.
1165
01:07:40,124 --> 01:07:42,459
He's killing me.
1166
01:07:42,492 --> 01:07:44,694
Killing would be merciful.
1167
01:07:44,728 --> 01:07:49,199
He's just crippling you, letting
you limp along mortally wounded
1168
01:07:49,233 --> 01:07:50,534
and bleeding.
1169
01:07:50,567 --> 01:07:52,749
Why don't we challenge
personal jurisdictional
1170
01:07:52,769 --> 01:07:54,338
on quasi and rem?
1171
01:07:58,308 --> 01:08:00,090
Shaffer versus Heitner, the Supreme Court
1172
01:08:00,110 --> 01:08:02,679
ruled that minimum dealings
with the form jurisdiction
1173
01:08:02,712 --> 01:08:05,315
may be sufficient to exercise
personal jurisdiction
1174
01:08:05,349 --> 01:08:06,921
over an individual or corporation
1175
01:08:06,950 --> 01:08:09,319
with which the state has
no ties or relations.
1176
01:08:12,622 --> 01:08:14,504
I've been thinking about
going to law school.
1177
01:08:14,524 --> 01:08:15,525
Well, you know what?
1178
01:08:15,559 --> 01:08:17,327
You'd make an amazing lawyer.
1179
01:08:17,361 --> 01:08:19,028
Damn right I would.
1180
01:08:19,062 --> 01:08:20,264
Thank you.
1181
01:08:20,297 --> 01:08:21,731
De nada.
1182
01:08:21,765 --> 01:08:23,380
That's great, Gina, but
what they don't teach you
1183
01:08:23,400 --> 01:08:26,903
in law school is that if
the judge wants you to lose,
1184
01:08:26,936 --> 01:08:28,071
you're gonna lose.
1185
01:08:28,104 --> 01:08:29,706
I did a judge once.
1186
01:08:29,739 --> 01:08:31,120
I've been screwed by justice.
1187
01:08:33,643 --> 01:08:36,246
It's time to punt, partner.
1188
01:08:36,280 --> 01:08:39,783
Fourth and goal?
1189
01:08:39,816 --> 01:08:42,586
David, grab the money
before it goes away.
1190
01:08:49,659 --> 01:08:51,074
At this point, my clients are only
1191
01:08:51,094 --> 01:08:53,343
willing to offer the
replacement value of the house
1192
01:08:53,363 --> 01:08:58,168
as stipulated in the
original policy, $275,000.
1193
01:08:58,202 --> 01:09:01,771
That's a pretty steep discount
from $3 million two days ago.
1194
01:09:01,805 --> 01:09:04,374
Well.
1195
01:09:04,408 --> 01:09:05,909
Things have changed.
1196
01:09:11,014 --> 01:09:14,050
God saved me from drinking.
1197
01:09:14,083 --> 01:09:16,620
I see.
1198
01:09:16,653 --> 01:09:21,591
But Rabbi, how could I represent Him?
1199
01:09:21,625 --> 01:09:26,530
Ms. Levin, I've been in
this business a long time.
1200
01:09:26,563 --> 01:09:31,501
And I've experienced my
share of crises of faith.
1201
01:09:31,535 --> 01:09:37,474
And all I can tell you is God is a verb.
1202
01:09:53,323 --> 01:09:56,260
Hey.
1203
01:09:56,293 --> 01:10:00,096
You got a birthday coming up.
1204
01:10:00,129 --> 01:10:04,401
When you get out of here,
I wanna take you to,
1205
01:10:04,434 --> 01:10:07,604
uh... to Disneyland.
1206
01:10:07,637 --> 01:10:12,041
Not Disney World, but the
original in California.
1207
01:10:20,183 --> 01:10:24,254
Why can't you pick on
someone your own size, huh?
1208
01:10:24,288 --> 01:10:25,655
Take me.
1209
01:10:25,689 --> 01:10:29,025
Cause I deserve it.
1210
01:10:29,058 --> 01:10:31,728
You shouldn't say bad things to God.
1211
01:10:37,200 --> 01:10:38,502
Hey, honey.
1212
01:10:38,535 --> 01:10:41,538
I... I... I didn't know you were listening.
1213
01:10:41,571 --> 01:10:44,508
God is always listening.
1214
01:10:56,085 --> 01:10:57,454
How'd you do?
1215
01:10:57,487 --> 01:11:00,089
I got three Qurans, four Bibles, Talmud,
1216
01:11:00,123 --> 01:11:01,371
Zohar, illustrated I Ching.
1217
01:11:01,391 --> 01:11:03,172
And a new translation of the Upanishads
1218
01:11:03,192 --> 01:11:05,929
is coming by expedited
shipping in the morning.
1219
01:11:05,962 --> 01:11:07,867
OK, you take these, I'll take the rest,
1220
01:11:07,897 --> 01:11:09,446
and we'll meet somewhere
around Turkestan.
1221
01:11:09,466 --> 01:11:10,534
It's gonna be a long night.
1222
01:11:10,567 --> 01:11:11,835
No problem, hefe.
1223
01:11:11,868 --> 01:11:15,038
I'm used to working nights.
1224
01:11:20,043 --> 01:11:21,745
Smite the blasphemer!
1225
01:11:21,778 --> 01:11:24,314
Smite the blasphemer!
1226
01:11:24,348 --> 01:11:26,316
Smite the blasphemer!
1227
01:11:26,350 --> 01:11:27,851
Smite the blasphemer!
1228
01:11:47,704 --> 01:11:52,576
All rise for the Honorable
Justice Jordan Randall.
1229
01:11:52,609 --> 01:11:53,809
Be seated.
1230
01:11:57,747 --> 01:11:59,896
Your Honor, both parties
have reached an agreement,
1231
01:11:59,916 --> 01:12:02,198
and we would like to move
for an immediate dismissal
1232
01:12:02,218 --> 01:12:03,152
at this time.
1233
01:12:03,186 --> 01:12:04,988
Is this true, Mr. Frank?
1234
01:12:09,793 --> 01:12:11,728
It was, Your Honor.
1235
01:12:16,099 --> 01:12:22,171
At this time, I would like to
enter into evidence this King
1236
01:12:22,205 --> 01:12:25,675
James Bible as exhibit A,
wherein it states, Psalms
1237
01:12:25,709 --> 01:12:28,378
139, verse 7, and I quote, "Where can I
1238
01:12:28,412 --> 01:12:30,313
go from your spirit?
1239
01:12:30,346 --> 01:12:31,928
Where can I flee from your presence?
1240
01:12:31,948 --> 01:12:34,651
If I go up to the heavens, you are there.
1241
01:12:34,684 --> 01:12:36,886
If I make my bed in the
depths, you are there.
1242
01:12:36,920 --> 01:12:38,822
If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
1243
01:12:38,855 --> 01:12:41,625
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
1244
01:12:41,658 --> 01:12:45,962
even there your
hand will guide me."
1245
01:12:45,995 --> 01:12:50,500
Exhibit B, the Al Quran, in
which the prophet Muhammad
1246
01:12:50,534 --> 01:12:54,037
tells us, "To God belong
the east and the west,
1247
01:12:54,070 --> 01:12:57,073
with us wherever you turn,
there is the presence of Hi.
1248
01:12:57,106 --> 01:13:00,243
God is with you
wheresoever you go."
1249
01:13:00,276 --> 01:13:05,314
Exhibit C, the Old
Testament, Jeremiah verse 23,
1250
01:13:05,348 --> 01:13:08,818
"'Do you think that I am some
local deity?' the Lord asked.
1251
01:13:08,852 --> 01:13:12,188
'Do you really think anyone can
hide himself where I cannot see
1252
01:13:12,221 --> 01:13:13,723
him?' the Lord asks.
1253
01:13:13,757 --> 01:13:18,762
'Do you not know that I am
everywhere?'" Exhibits D to Z,
1254
01:13:18,795 --> 01:13:22,666
sacred texts from religions
all around the world confirming
1255
01:13:22,699 --> 01:13:29,405
the same truth, that God
is, in fact, omnipresent.
1256
01:13:29,439 --> 01:13:30,940
He is everywhere.
1257
01:13:30,974 --> 01:13:33,877
Therefore, not only was he
present and doing business
1258
01:13:33,910 --> 01:13:36,880
in the state of Florida the
night my house was destroyed,
1259
01:13:36,913 --> 01:13:40,717
but the Almighty is right here
in this courtroom right now,
1260
01:13:40,750 --> 01:13:43,520
and He has been for this entire trial.
1261
01:13:43,553 --> 01:13:45,622
And unless the defense wants to challenge
1262
01:13:45,655 --> 01:13:47,591
the validity of these sacred texts,
1263
01:13:47,624 --> 01:13:49,893
then the Almighty is, in fact, present.
1264
01:13:49,926 --> 01:13:54,163
And the personal jurisdiction
exclusion simply cannot apply
1265
01:13:54,197 --> 01:13:55,397
to this trial.
1266
01:13:56,099 --> 01:13:57,066
Objection!
1267
01:13:57,100 --> 01:13:58,448
Your Honor, the plaintiff is once again
1268
01:13:58,468 --> 01:13:59,716
trying to use rhetorical gimmicks
1269
01:13:59,736 --> 01:14:01,117
to distort the facts of this case
1270
01:14:01,137 --> 01:14:02,719
and renege on the agreed settlement.
1271
01:14:02,739 --> 01:14:03,573
Gimmicks?
1272
01:14:03,607 --> 01:14:04,574
This is no gimmick.
1273
01:14:04,608 --> 01:14:06,142
This is the big truth, man.
1274
01:14:06,175 --> 01:14:09,979
If these are acts of God, then
let God be held accountable!
1275
01:14:10,013 --> 01:14:13,049
Omniscient, omnipotent, omnipresent...
1276
01:14:13,082 --> 01:14:16,720
He knows everything, he can
do anything, he is everywhere,
1277
01:14:16,753 --> 01:14:19,422
and I reserve the right
to call God to the stand.
1278
01:14:19,455 --> 01:14:20,657
Can I get a witness?
1279
01:14:20,690 --> 01:14:21,491
Yeah!
1280
01:14:21,525 --> 01:14:22,391
Halleleujah!
1281
01:14:22,425 --> 01:14:23,960
Halleleujah!
1282
01:14:30,233 --> 01:14:32,043
Ah, you should have seen me in there.
1283
01:14:34,904 --> 01:14:36,906
Man, I kicked some biblical ass.
1284
01:14:40,309 --> 01:14:45,682
You probably would have just
laughed that funny little snort
1285
01:14:45,715 --> 01:14:46,915
of yours.
1286
01:14:58,061 --> 01:14:59,909
I'm sorry, Ms. Levin,
but it's the Sabbath,
1287
01:14:59,929 --> 01:15:02,198
and, uh, I'm afraid I'm
forbidden from doing
1288
01:15:02,231 --> 01:15:03,733
any work after sundown.
1289
01:15:03,767 --> 01:15:07,604
So any business is gonna
have to wait until Monday.
1290
01:15:07,637 --> 01:15:09,005
No,
no, Mr. Frank, I'm
1291
01:15:09,038 --> 01:15:13,076
not gonna be there on Monday.
1292
01:15:13,109 --> 01:15:14,423
What are you talking about?
1293
01:15:14,443 --> 01:15:17,113
I'm... I'm not... I'm off the case.
1294
01:15:17,146 --> 01:15:21,918
And I'm just calling
to warn you, Mr. Frank,
1295
01:15:21,951 --> 01:15:27,090
in the interest of full
bipartisan disclosure
1296
01:15:27,123 --> 01:15:34,363
that Carl is gonna bust
your kneecaps, my friend.
1297
01:15:34,397 --> 01:15:37,066
So you're... what?
1298
01:15:37,100 --> 01:15:38,635
You're just walking away?
1299
01:15:38,668 --> 01:15:39,803
Mhm. I am.
1300
01:15:39,836 --> 01:15:42,405
I'm turning my back on God.
1301
01:15:42,438 --> 01:15:46,075
I am no longer God's lawyer.
1302
01:15:46,109 --> 01:15:47,309
Uh-huh.
1303
01:15:49,478 --> 01:15:51,080
Are you OK?
1304
01:15:51,114 --> 01:15:52,381
Yeah.
1305
01:15:52,415 --> 01:15:53,917
I'm good.
1306
01:15:53,950 --> 01:15:58,988
I mean, I could
use some pizza with ham on it,
1307
01:15:59,022 --> 01:16:02,291
maybe some... you know, why
don't you throw some shrimp on
1308
01:16:02,325 --> 01:16:03,126
there too, right?
1309
01:16:03,159 --> 01:16:04,093
Shabbat Shalom.
1310
01:16:04,127 --> 01:16:06,295
OK, here's what I need you to do.
1311
01:16:06,329 --> 01:16:09,899
You need to give me your address
and step away from the phone.
1312
01:16:09,933 --> 01:16:11,500
Don't think that that's
1313
01:16:11,534 --> 01:16:12,969
a very good idea, Mr. Frank.
1314
01:16:13,002 --> 01:16:14,483
Ms. Levin, anyone
willing to put
1315
01:16:14,503 --> 01:16:18,608
ham and shrimp on the same
pizza is a ticking time bomb.
1316
01:16:18,642 --> 01:16:19,976
I know what I'm doing.
1317
01:16:20,009 --> 01:16:22,311
Hm.
1318
01:16:43,599 --> 01:16:44,799
Morning.
1319
01:16:51,941 --> 01:16:56,112
Oh, man, Manischewitz.
1320
01:16:56,145 --> 01:16:57,446
Please.
1321
01:16:57,480 --> 01:16:59,582
Please.
1322
01:16:59,615 --> 01:17:01,184
Sorry.
1323
01:17:01,217 --> 01:17:06,656
Look, um, I appreciate
your help, but, uh,
1324
01:17:06,690 --> 01:17:08,591
could you please just leave me alone?
1325
01:17:08,624 --> 01:17:11,194
I tell you what, why
don't we have a quick bite,
1326
01:17:11,227 --> 01:17:14,931
and then you got the rest of
the day to beat yourself up.
1327
01:17:19,568 --> 01:17:22,005
Why are you doing this?
1328
01:17:22,038 --> 01:17:23,472
Because you need protein.
1329
01:17:28,812 --> 01:17:31,280
If I eat this, do you
swear to never mentioned
1330
01:17:31,314 --> 01:17:34,417
the events of the last 12
hours to another living soul?
1331
01:17:34,450 --> 01:17:35,952
So help me God.
1332
01:17:46,362 --> 01:17:47,562
You got skills.
1333
01:17:49,799 --> 01:17:51,534
Yeah, I like to cook.
1334
01:17:51,567 --> 01:17:54,838
Usually just for me
and my dog, but Brutus,
1335
01:17:54,871 --> 01:18:00,076
he doesn't love garlic, which,
um, makes it pretty limiting.
1336
01:18:00,109 --> 01:18:01,457
How do you feel about garlic?
1337
01:18:01,477 --> 01:18:02,677
Love it.
1338
01:18:05,915 --> 01:18:07,483
So nothing happened last night?
1339
01:18:11,154 --> 01:18:17,260
Well, if you call puking
your guts up nothing.
1340
01:18:17,293 --> 01:18:20,129
Personally, I consider
it a very intimate thing.
1341
01:18:20,163 --> 01:18:22,866
You consider that intimacy?
1342
01:18:22,899 --> 01:18:24,400
Well, yeah.
1343
01:18:24,433 --> 01:18:26,716
I mean, when you get to
see someone at their worst,
1344
01:18:26,736 --> 01:18:30,874
you really get to see them.
1345
01:18:30,907 --> 01:18:32,641
And last night, I got to see a lot.
1346
01:18:35,511 --> 01:18:36,679
Yeah.
1347
01:18:36,712 --> 01:18:44,220
What did you see, a, uh,
wretched, weak hypocrite?
1348
01:18:49,658 --> 01:18:52,328
I saw an amateur.
1349
01:18:56,599 --> 01:19:00,003
Who gets drunk off sweet wine?
1350
01:19:00,036 --> 01:19:01,537
That's all I had.
1351
01:19:04,440 --> 01:19:08,611
I will say you're a sweet drunk.
1352
01:19:14,317 --> 01:19:16,786
Are you flirting with me?
1353
01:19:16,820 --> 01:19:18,020
Hm.
1354
01:19:20,523 --> 01:19:21,723
I don't know.
1355
01:19:24,794 --> 01:19:31,868
Look, David, um, I don't know
what you're still doing here,
1356
01:19:31,901 --> 01:19:33,937
but I think you should do us both a favor
1357
01:19:33,970 --> 01:19:38,607
and just run away as fast as you can.
1358
01:19:56,960 --> 01:19:58,607
You probably... probably
have a lot of work
1359
01:19:58,627 --> 01:20:01,831
to do, prepare for your closing argument.
1360
01:20:01,865 --> 01:20:03,399
Yeah.
1361
01:20:03,432 --> 01:20:07,736
And, uh, you probably have a
lot of, uh, self-loathing to do.
1362
01:20:07,770 --> 01:20:08,704
Yeah.
1363
01:20:08,737 --> 01:20:10,974
Get right on that.
1364
01:20:11,007 --> 01:20:13,843
If you need any help,
just give me a call.
1365
01:20:13,877 --> 01:20:15,378
I'm pretty good at loathing.
1366
01:20:15,411 --> 01:20:16,045
Mhm.
1367
01:20:16,079 --> 01:20:16,946
Thank you.
1368
01:20:16,980 --> 01:20:18,547
That's very generous.
1369
01:20:18,581 --> 01:20:20,649
Happy to help, loser.
1370
01:20:21,985 --> 01:20:23,619
Just a taste.
1371
01:20:23,652 --> 01:20:24,852
You're good.
1372
01:20:34,998 --> 01:20:36,565
Hey.
1373
01:20:36,599 --> 01:20:38,414
There's actually a launch out
at the Cape tomorrow morning.
1374
01:20:38,434 --> 01:20:44,207
Any chance you want to...
You know, check it out?
1375
01:20:44,240 --> 01:20:50,113
That sounds like a really,
really terrible idea.
1376
01:20:50,146 --> 01:20:54,283
True, but it's really, really awesome.
1377
01:21:04,293 --> 01:21:07,363
I can't decide if you're brave or stupid.
1378
01:21:12,201 --> 01:21:17,140
Is it bravery when
you've got nothing to lose?
1379
01:21:17,173 --> 01:21:18,793
There's always something to lose.
1380
01:21:28,117 --> 01:21:30,886
Just over there about six miles.
1381
01:21:30,920 --> 01:21:34,423
You can just make it out.
1382
01:21:34,457 --> 01:21:35,458
Yeah.
1383
01:21:35,491 --> 01:21:36,691
I see it.
1384
01:21:41,430 --> 01:21:48,571
After my wife died, I
started coming out here.
1385
01:21:48,604 --> 01:21:50,119
I'd watch the sun go down, stay up
1386
01:21:50,139 --> 01:21:52,608
all night looking at the stars.
1387
01:21:52,641 --> 01:21:54,677
Then in the morning
I'd watch the liftoff.
1388
01:21:59,382 --> 01:22:02,618
You know, the ancients used
to look up into the night sky
1389
01:22:02,651 --> 01:22:06,689
and they'd see gods.
1390
01:22:06,722 --> 01:22:12,361
Even astronauts had religious
experiences out in space.
1391
01:22:12,395 --> 01:22:14,497
Maybe heaven really is up there.
1392
01:22:20,236 --> 01:22:26,375
The world just became incredibly dull.
1393
01:22:26,409 --> 01:22:30,679
For years I managed to sustain
myself on anger and self-pity
1394
01:22:30,713 --> 01:22:38,713
alone, but I just don't
know what the point is.
1395
01:22:43,126 --> 01:22:44,627
Maybe there is no point.
1396
01:22:52,101 --> 01:22:53,669
How can you say that?
1397
01:22:53,702 --> 01:22:58,174
Because who knows?
1398
01:23:06,482 --> 01:23:10,453
Do you remember the Breslin
case a few years ago?
1399
01:23:10,486 --> 01:23:12,555
The guy who killed those kids?
1400
01:23:17,593 --> 01:23:18,793
I knew.
1401
01:23:22,765 --> 01:23:25,901
I knew he was a killer,
and I got him off.
1402
01:23:25,934 --> 01:23:27,134
But I knew.
1403
01:23:33,242 --> 01:23:37,580
You were just doing your job.
1404
01:23:37,613 --> 01:23:40,183
That's what I told myself.
1405
01:23:40,216 --> 01:23:41,630
And for a long time, it worked.
1406
01:23:41,650 --> 01:23:45,688
But... Just
have to stay numb.
1407
01:23:49,092 --> 01:23:50,393
Not this time.
1408
01:23:50,426 --> 01:23:55,698
Just... I couldn't live with it.
1409
01:23:58,501 --> 01:24:05,674
So I, uh, pumped myself full
of what should have killed me.
1410
01:24:05,708 --> 01:24:13,708
And when I didn't die,
I knew He wanted me to live.
1411
01:24:15,751 --> 01:24:21,757
And when I didn't die,
I knew He wanted me to live.
1412
01:24:21,790 --> 01:24:27,363
There is some reason,
but I've failed Him.
1413
01:24:27,396 --> 01:24:29,465
I've forsaken Him, lost.
1414
01:24:36,372 --> 01:24:39,342
You're not lost.
1415
01:24:39,375 --> 01:24:42,911
You're right here, right now.
1416
01:24:42,945 --> 01:24:45,448
And this is exactly where
you're supposed to be.
1417
01:24:52,955 --> 01:24:54,155
Please don't.
1418
01:24:58,093 --> 01:24:59,293
Why not?
1419
01:25:01,930 --> 01:25:03,432
So many reasons.
1420
01:25:06,935 --> 01:25:08,871
Have a little faith.
1421
01:25:54,850 --> 01:25:57,820
That was awesome.
1422
01:26:21,610 --> 01:26:24,580
I'd like to thank you for a really
1423
01:26:24,613 --> 01:26:29,151
beautiful and unconscionable
conflict of interest.
1424
01:26:29,184 --> 01:26:31,354
I am not the enemy.
1425
01:26:31,387 --> 01:26:33,522
No, but you're still a dangerous heretic.
1426
01:26:33,556 --> 01:26:37,226
You know, I don't think
heresy is contagious.
1427
01:26:37,260 --> 01:26:38,627
No, I'm sorry.
1428
01:26:38,661 --> 01:26:41,464
I refused to subscribe
to your moral relativism.
1429
01:26:41,497 --> 01:26:44,032
Why don't you leave
my relatives out of it
1430
01:26:44,066 --> 01:26:45,934
and invite me inside.
1431
01:26:53,976 --> 01:26:55,478
Good luck tomorrow.
1432
01:26:55,511 --> 01:27:01,317
I'm gonna go inside now,
pray for your defeat.
1433
01:27:01,350 --> 01:27:02,550
Understood.
1434
01:27:46,829 --> 01:27:48,115
I don't have any answers.
1435
01:27:51,867 --> 01:27:54,236
Only questions.
1436
01:27:54,269 --> 01:27:55,469
Lots of questions.
1437
01:27:59,775 --> 01:28:07,182
So at this time, I would like
to call God to the stand.
1438
01:28:07,215 --> 01:28:08,651
Objection.
1439
01:28:08,684 --> 01:28:11,420
Haven't we heard enough
of this farce, Your Honor?
1440
01:28:11,454 --> 01:28:14,423
You are skating dangerously
close to contempt, Mr. Frank.
1441
01:28:14,457 --> 01:28:17,292
Oh, I'm way past contempt, Your Honor.
1442
01:28:17,326 --> 01:28:21,229
But if God is everywhere and in all
1443
01:28:21,263 --> 01:28:23,899
things, then why not in that chair?
1444
01:28:26,569 --> 01:28:32,975
Imagine if I could put God in that chair
1445
01:28:33,008 --> 01:28:36,812
and I could ask Him anything and He
1446
01:28:36,845 --> 01:28:39,515
was sworn to tell the truth,
the whole truth, and nothing
1447
01:28:39,548 --> 01:28:43,018
but the truth, so help Him... Him.
1448
01:28:46,955 --> 01:28:54,955
As God as my witness, I would
ask Him all those questions
1449
01:28:58,300 --> 01:29:05,974
that we poor mortals have
hungered for the answer to.
1450
01:29:06,008 --> 01:29:07,208
Why?
1451
01:29:09,612 --> 01:29:10,812
Why are we here?
1452
01:29:13,081 --> 01:29:18,153
Why is there so much strife
and suffering in this world?
1453
01:29:18,186 --> 01:29:22,290
How come all the really good
stuff is illegal, immoral,
1454
01:29:22,324 --> 01:29:25,027
and fattening?
1455
01:29:25,060 --> 01:29:30,365
Finally, I would... I would ask
the witness, did you, in fact,
1456
01:29:30,399 --> 01:29:31,700
destroy my house?
1457
01:29:34,102 --> 01:29:42,102
And I believe that if God were
sitting here, He would say,
1458
01:29:42,210 --> 01:29:47,349
yes, I gave you that gift.
1459
01:29:47,382 --> 01:29:49,652
And I would be like, gift?
1460
01:29:49,685 --> 01:29:53,589
And He'd be like, yeah, you heard me.
1461
01:29:53,622 --> 01:29:54,890
Think about it.
1462
01:29:54,923 --> 01:29:56,839
If I hadn't destroyed
your house, none of this
1463
01:29:56,859 --> 01:29:59,294
would have happened.
1464
01:29:59,327 --> 01:30:06,301
And you'd still be wallowing in
bitterness, your heart turned
1465
01:30:06,334 --> 01:30:10,739
to stone, dead inside.
1466
01:30:15,844 --> 01:30:22,284
Because what is God if not love?
1467
01:30:28,924 --> 01:30:30,305
And even though I look around me,
1468
01:30:30,325 --> 01:30:33,729
and I still see a world
full of senseless tragedy
1469
01:30:33,762 --> 01:30:36,999
and suffering, I
recognize the possibility
1470
01:30:37,032 --> 01:30:39,935
that the destruction of my house may have
1471
01:30:39,968 --> 01:30:43,205
been a blessing in disguise.
1472
01:30:45,941 --> 01:30:52,715
Therefore, Your Honor, this time, I
1473
01:30:52,748 --> 01:30:56,118
withdraw my claim in this action.
1474
01:30:56,151 --> 01:31:01,456
And as for God, I have
no further questions.
1475
01:31:31,787 --> 01:31:32,987
Heretic.
1476
01:31:36,258 --> 01:31:37,459
Time to meet your maker.
1477
01:32:23,672 --> 01:32:24,973
Where am I?
1478
01:32:29,845 --> 01:32:31,346
You're in the ambulance.
1479
01:32:45,227 --> 01:32:46,427
Is this heaven?
1480
01:32:48,797 --> 01:32:49,997
This is your heaven.
1481
01:32:55,270 --> 01:32:58,206
Why?
1482
01:32:58,240 --> 01:33:00,976
Why what?
1483
01:33:01,009 --> 01:33:09,009
Why... why everything?
1484
01:33:12,988 --> 01:33:15,858
I don't understand the question.
1485
01:33:15,891 --> 01:33:21,563
Then again, maybe you don't
understand the question.
1486
01:33:21,596 --> 01:33:24,266
Hey, that's my line.
1487
01:33:24,299 --> 01:33:25,499
Is it?
1488
01:33:31,306 --> 01:33:35,811
Are you sure you're
ready for the answers?
1489
01:34:16,218 --> 01:34:19,855
Well, did you see a tunnel
of light or something?
1490
01:34:26,661 --> 01:34:29,264
Not exactly.
1491
01:34:29,297 --> 01:34:30,497
But something.
1492
01:34:32,701 --> 01:34:35,470
I don't know.
1493
01:34:35,503 --> 01:34:39,607
They say those things are
just, uh... just a lack of blood
1494
01:34:39,641 --> 01:34:40,841
to the cortex, right?
107273
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.