All language subtitles for The Wistful Widow of Wagon Gap (1947)

(gentle music)

(lively orchestral music)

(dramatic orchestral music)

- [Man] All out, all out.

- [Duke] What's the matter, a holdup?

- Nope, they missed us this time.

This is as far as we go, gents.

- Well, now wait a minute.

Says three miles to Wagon Gap.

- That's as close as we go, partner.

That sign is a warning.

Nobody ain't a local ever goes closer.

- [Duke] Ah.

- Hope you sell your wares.

I hear tell there's a lot
of money in Wagon Gap.

The only problem is to live
long enough to get it out.

(bag thuds)

- [Chester] Partner, which way
you say it was to Wagon Gap?

- That way.
- That way?

Come on, Duke.
- Come here, wait a minute.

Now what are you scared of?

- Wagon Gap.

- We'll sell our wares tonight
and leave for California

first thing in the morning.

- If you boys are going into Wagon Gap,

take my advice and strap on
a couple of shooting irons.

If you can bluff 'em, you
might live till morning.

- He's got something there.

How much will you take for those guns?

- $50.

- It's a deal.

There you are.
- Thanks.

- Aw, Duke, that ain't fair.

- What's wrong?
- Look.

Yours is much longer than mine.

- So what?!

All you have to do is stand closer

to whoever's shooting at you.

- As long as you boys
are going into Wagon Gap,

would you mind taking
this mail in with you?

- Why, certainly.

There you are.

(gentle music)

- [Driver] Giddy up, horse.

- Joe Bazzo, Erskine Lakes.

Dear Sal, this is to let
you know we are building

a new log house where
the old log house stood.

We are using the logs
from the old log house

to build the new log house,

but we are going to let
the old log house stand

until the new log house is built.

I don't get it.

- You reading other people's mail for?

Put that away.

(lively orchestral music)

(guns firing)

(horse riders shouting)

What are you ducking for, you scared?

Come on, come on, get with it.

Come on, come on.

- Hey, Duke.
- What?

- Let's go in here. It's safe.

(door thuds)

(punches thudding)
(people shouting)

- Chester, come out of there.

You don't belong in there.

Get over here.

What's the matter? Tired?

- Yeah.
- Sit down.

Come on, let's go.

Come on, come on, Chester.

Look, don't let this town scare you.

What you've got to keep
saying to yourself is,

I must be brave.

I must be strong!

- Say it to myself?
- Certainly.

- I must be brave.
- Attaboy.

- I must be strong.
- Now you're talking.

- I must be brave.

I must be strong.

(horse rider shouting)

(gun firing)

I must be nuts.

(guns firing)
(horse riders shout)

- [Duke] Oh, no, you don't!

- Hey!

(gun firing)

- [Duke] Come back with that merchandise.

- Wait a minute, Duke,
what are you gonna do?

- Gonna be just as tough as they are!

- You never shot one of those
things off in your life.

- What's the difference, get out your gun.

- Get out my gun?
- Get out your gun!

- I never shot one either.

- Take the gun out.
- Okay.

- We'll fix them.
- What am I gonna do with it?

- Fire, shoot it off!

- Where?
- Up in the air.

What do you care?
- But it makes a noise.

- Come on, shoot it off!

(gun fires)
(body thuds)

- Fred Hawkins.

That's nice shooting, partner.

- Can't think of an ornery
critter who'll be missed less.

And you got him right through the heart.

- I got him?

I shot over there.

He fell over here.

- Then that really is nice shooting.

Jake Frame's been trying to
get rid of this here varmint.

Come on inside, and he'll set up

the drinks free for helping him out.

- I told you shooting was the only way

to come into this town.

- Now wait a minute.

This man's just been killed.

- [Man] So? Who's upset?

-Iam.

- Judge.

Judge Benbow.

(Judge Benbow snores)

Judge?

- Okay, Jim, what are you

and the Citizens'
Committee riled about now?

- Judge, I demand that
those men be charged

with murder and held for trial.

- Oh, well, now, I don't know, Jim.

Why, it looks like a friendly
shooting affair to me.

Self-defense.

Fred there's got a gun in his hand.

- There've been 10 killings
in this town in the last week

and not one man has been brought to trial.

What sort of law do we have around here?

- All right, Jim, if you insist.

What's the deceased got on him?

- [Man] $12 and this
knife in his hip pocket.

- I hereby fine the deceased $12

for carrying concealed weapons.

Court's adjourned.

- Now just a minute, Judge.

- [Chester] You heard what the judge said.

- Yeah, just a minute, Judge.

- Stay out of this, Frame.

This is one pair of killers
you're not getting off.

- Simmer down.

I'm on your side.

- Now, Judge, just what
kind of a trial was that?

- Why, Jake, that is I--

- Couple of strangers come into town

and shoot down one of our best

beloved citizens in cold blood,

and you want to let them get away with it.

- What's got into you?

- That's the fellow that
was gonna buy us a drink?

- Shut up.

- It's getting sorta unsafe

for a man to walk the
streets of Wagon Gap.

- You said it.

That fellow over there almost fell on me.

- Well, if the law don't
do something about it,

we better do something about it ourselves.

Eh, fellas?

I said, what about it?!

I'm thinking a little taste
of rope is called for!

(people shouting)

- Wait a minute, men, wait a minute.

Judge Benbow, I demand that you stop this.

- You nor anybody is stopping
this hanging, Simpson.

Now get outta the way,
you're obstructing justice.

- Come on, come on, come on.
(people chattering)

(ominous music)

- [Chester] Is that hard to do?

- No, no, you'll soon get the hang of it.

Try this on for size.

- 16 and a half.

- How's that?

- That tickles.
- Yeah?

- That didn't, it don't tickle no more.

- [Man In Black] Better hurry it up!

Citizens' Committee is headed this way.

- [Jake] Get going, boys.

- Chester, we gotta stall 'em.

- Stall 'em?

Oh, stall 'em.
- Yeah.

- Did you fellas ever hear the story

about the traveling salesman?

- Oh, certainly they've heard that one.

That's an oldie.
- Yes, and it ain't funny.

- Wait a minute, boys.

What about our personal possessions?

Chester, don't you want
to send something home

to your dear old mother for keepsake?

- My mother?
- Yes.

Yeah, to your mother.
- Oh, my mother.

- Certainly.
- Yes, sir.

I would like to send some of my stuff home

to my mother.
- Yes.

- Would you take care
of this stuff for me?

- I'd be very happy to.

- It's priceless, this stuff.

Here, hold that please.

Yes.

(kazoo buzzing)

- That's enough stalling.

String 'em up!

(gun firing)

- [Jim] Sorry to spoil your party, Frame,

but this is gonna be done legally.

- Since when are you the law?

I don't see you wearing
the sheriff's badge.

- Somebody got careless and
put a bullet hole through it.

50, till we can keep a
live sheriff around here,

the Citizens' Committee's taking over.

And we're seeing to it that
these men get a fair trial.

- Fair enough.

And I'll sure see to it that
Judge Benbow gives it to 'em.

Come on, boys.

- Just because he don't
like you, he's mad at us.

- Now, Chester, don't be ungrateful.

If it wasn't for Mr. Simpson
here, we'd be dead by now.

- If it wasn't for Mr. Simpson,

we'd be on our way to California by now.

Look, I'll tell you what you do.

Give us a couple of horses
and show us the road,

and we'll call it even.

- The only road you're
taking is back to Wagon Gap.

You're charged with a killing,

and you're gonna stand trial for it.

On your way back into town,
you can figure out your plea.

- I'll plead insanity,
and I can prove it too.

(people chattering)
(lively piano music)

- This court will now come to order.

(gun thudding)

Close down that bar!

And quit gambling for a few minutes!

Will the jury please file in?

- I object!

(gun thudding)
- Order in the court!

- [Chester] He objected to what you said.

- I figured you might be wanting a jury,

so, to save a little time,
I picked one for you.

(gasp5)

- Look.

- [Duke] That's the gang
that was gonna hang us.

- [Judge Benbow] And to
keep everything legal,

in case you don't like
any member of the jury,

you can challenge him.

- I'll fight that little shrimp there.

- Order, order, order in the court!

Young man, in about two shakes,
I'll hold you in contempt!

- Judge, quit stalling.

Let's get this over with.

- Okay, Jake.

As the judge of this here court,

I hereby sentence you two coyotes--

- Just a minute, Your Honor.

I'd like the court's permission

to say a few words to the defendants.

- [Judge Benbow] Oh, I don't know, Jim.

We're keeping Jake's business shut down,

and these delays are costing him money.

But 90 ahead and make it snappy.

- Thank you, Your Honor.

Boys, it strikes me mighty curious

that Jake Frame's so anxious
to get you fellas hung,

and I'd like to know why.

- Don't ask us, we're strangers.

- But I intend to find out,

and if fellas will string along with me,

I got an angle to keep
you alive until I do.

- All right, Mr. Simpson.

Go ahead. We're in back of you.

- Good.

Your Honor, the defendants in this case

are willing to plead guilty

to the charge of killing
Fred Hawkins in a gun duel.

- He did it again.

He said we did it.

Now they'll hang me.

- Well, are you guilty?

- No.

- Then what are you worrying about?

- 0h.

- Jim, the court thanks you
for simplifying matters.

I hereby sentence you two coyotes--

- Your Honor, may I remind
you that you have a jury?

- I picked them, didn't I?

- You picked some of them
before they were ripe.

- Shut up, you!
(hand slaps)

- What's the matter?

- You boys want to get your heads together

and bring in a verdict of--

- Your Honor, I suggest
you first acquaint the jury

with the statutes in the penal
code pertaining to dueling.

- Now, Jim, let's not get all
snarled up in legal folderol.

- I have the statutes before me.

Would you like for me to read them?

Or would you prefer to
quote them from memory?

- No, no.

Go ahead.

- Section 86-97 of the penal code

of the sovereign state of Montana.

If any person slays or
permanently disables

another person in a duel,

the slayer must provide
for the maintenance

of the wife of the person
slain or permanently disabled

and for the minor children.

And Section 86-98, said
slayer must pay all debts

of the person slain or
permanently disabled.

- What does he mean?

- Yes.
- Oh.

- In simpler language, Your Honor,

the law makes these men responsible

for all the obligations of the deceased,

both to his family and his creditors.

- Hawkins owed me $50, Your Honor.

- Considering what Hawkins owed me,

I'd say that's a right good law.

- Well, as a matter of fact,
Jake, I think so myself,

especially the part about
them maintaining the widow.

(people laughing)

(gentle music)

(chickens squawking)

(cow lowing)

Well, this is it!

- I don't see any corn growing.

- The widow don't grow corn.

- Then what's that
scarecrow doing in the yard?

- Who you calling a scarecrow?!

You scatterbrained numskull!

- [Judge Benbow] Ah, the Widow Hawkins.

- [Chester] Oh.

- [Judge Benbow] Howdy, Mrs. Hawkins.

These are them.

- The culprits, huh?

- Mrs. Hawkins, I'm awful sorry.

- Oh, think nothing of it.

I ain't hypocrite enough
to shed tears for Hawkins.

He just wasn't any good.

All he ever did was drink and gamble.

Hawkins, come here!

(thrilling music)

- All he ever did was drink and gamble.

Come on, Duke.

(whistles loudly)

(dog barking)

- [Chester] Bad dog.

- Go on, Wolf.

- [Judge Benbow] I can
see you have the situation

well under control, ma'am.

Guess we can get back to town.

- Just a minute, Judge, Your Honor.

As long as our main obligation

is to take care of Mrs.
Hawkins and the kids,

why can't we make some kind
of a financial arrangement?

- Such as?
- Well, we'll give her

some cash now and send a little
every month from California.

- How much you got?

- Well, now, let me see.

Mm, I have $70.

- Precisely the amount
the deceased owed me.

Poker the other night, Mrs. Hawkins.

- Duke, you better
think of something else.

Come on.
- I have.

You know, Judge, there was only one bullet

found in the body of the deceased,

and you can't hold both of us.

It's not legal.

- Duke, don't get technical.

- I think you got a point there, Egan.

- Yes, and he's pointing it right at me!

- Quiet.

- Ma'am, we have to keep this thing legal.

Now we've got to let one of them go.

Which one do you prefer?

Or have you a preference?

- Well, ain't much to pick from, is there?

The little one looks kinda good to me,

but maybe the big one
would be a better worker.

- Ahem.

Judge, you have no objections
if we gamble for this?

- Well, there's no law against gambling,

providing it's honest.

- I'll play it as honest as you would.

- [Judge Benbow] Well, go ahead.

Get it over with.

- Take a card.

- Any one?
- Any card.

I won't even look.

Don't look at it!
- You didn't give me a chance.

You hit it down so fast.

- Don't try to cheat.

Play it on the up and up.

Now what card were you thinking of?

- What card was I thinking of?

- What card were you thinking of?

Come on, get it over with.

- I was thinking of the nine of clubs.

- Oh, no, it was the eight of spades.

I'm terribly sorry.
- That's the card

you were thinking of?
- Yes, that was the card, yes.

- How do you know it
was the eight of spades?

- Just a minute.

What does that look like?
- The eight of spades.

- Well, what are you hollering about?!

- That ain't a bit fair.

- Just a minute, please!
(Chester hums)

- You always (hums).

- Just a minute, I'll
leave it to the judge.

- Go ahead.
- Judge, do you think

that was fair and square?

- That's the way I'd have done it.

- That's what I thought.

Good bye, ol' pal.

I'm going to miss you.

On my way to California,

I'm gonna be alone and desolate,

left with nothing but fond
memories of our long friendship.

Goodbye, Chester, ol' boy.

- Goodbye, Duke.

- Ma'am, take good care of him.

- I just feel terrible being the cause

of you two good friends parting.

- Well, it'll be hard for me for a while,

but I'll get over it.

Judge, my money.

- What money?

- You found me innocent,

therefore I don't have to
pay any of Hawkins's debts.

- That's right.

Son, it sort of cracks my heart
to separate you two fellas,

so I'm gonna do you a kindness.

I hereby appoint you
custodian of the guardian.

And as such, you will
see that he carries out

the terms of his sentence.

- Wait a minute, what's that for?

- Legal fees.

- But that's not legal.

- Just as legal as that
card trick of yours.

Ma'am, they're both yours.

Well, I'll get back to town.

Good afternoon, gents.

All right, then, here we go.

- Are you satisfied?

Now we're both stuck on
this broken-down ranch

with nothing to do but work.

Hey, it could be pretty nice work too.

- Juanita.

Come here!

This is Juanita, my eldest.

- How do you do? I'm Duke Egan.

This is my pal, Chester Wooley.

- This one's your new guardian.

And this, Mr. Wooley, is a
critter that needs guarding.

She's got some frisky notions
I'm expecting you to halter.

- I don't think you'll be
mean to me, Mr. Wooley,

or can I call you Daddy?

- [Chester] Oh.

(Chester laughs)

- What's the matter with you?

- I'm sort of a guardian to the guardian,

but you can call me--

- [Chester] Just call him Duke.

- Juanita, get in the house

and rustle up something for supper.

You fellas go to the pump and wash up.

(whistles loudly)

Go with 'em, Wolf!
(dog barking)

I hope this soup's just right.

If I'm any judge of character,

the way to Mr. Wooley's
heart is through his stomach.

- You don't have to cotton to him, Ma.

He's sort of a prisoner of war.

- When a woman gets to be my age,

the only way she can be sure
of a man is to marry him.

We've got the young'uns to think of.

- Suppose Mr. Wooley
isn't the marrying kind?

- Oh, every man's the marrying kind.

All you got to know is how
to go about getting him.

More flies are caught
with honey than vinegar.

50 beginning right now, I'm
a woman of honeyed words.

Everything I say to Mr. Wooley
will be sweet as nectar.

My muted voice will be tuned
to the strings of his heart.

My touch will be feathery
light as I stroke those strings

to bring forth a dulcet melody of love.

- [Juanita] What if honey
doesn't work on Mr. Wooley?

- Then I'll hogtie him!

Come and get it!

Come and get it!

(children shouting)

Matt, you get outta there.

Beginning tonight, Mr. Wooley
sits at the head of the table.

- Aw, Ma--
- Get before I take

a ladle to you.

Take your rightful place, Mr. Wooley.

Mr. Egan, you sit on
Mr. Wooley's left hand,

and, Matt, you sit on his right hand.

- What do I eat with? My feet?

- 0h, sit down.

- Ha-ha, fooled you.

- [Matt] Ha!

- Ha.
- Ha, ha.

(Chester chuckles)

- Come on, sit down.

What's the matter with you?

- Okay.

- Mr. Wooley, help yourself to some bread,

fresh baked, especially for you.

- Duke, can I have a piece of bread?

- Help yourself.
- There's none there.

- 0h.

Have a piece of mine.
- Thank you.

- Hog, don't eat so fast.

- [Matt] Mr. Wooley,
have a piece of my bread.

- There you are.
- Thank you.

You're such a good child.

- Soup's one of my best dishes.

Try it, Mr. Wooley.

(frog croaks)
(soup splashes)

- Please excuse yourself.

- I didn't do nothing.

- See that it don't happen again.

Go on, eat your soup.

Go on, eat your soup.

- Yes, sir.

(frog croaks)
(soup splashes)

- I told you not to let
that happen again, didn't I?

Excuse yourself!

- I didn't do nothing.

It's the soup.

- Don't blame it on the soup.

- I don't have to brag
about my soup, Mr. Wooley.

It speaks for itself.

- You can say that again.

- Oh, eat your soup.

- Okay.

It's that good, huh?
- Mm-hm, delicious.

- That's okay with me.

- But listen, don't hurt
the widow's feelings,

otherwise we'll be here a long time.

- I won't say nothing to her.

- All right, but look,

eat the soup whether you like it or not.

- So I'll make a face, what do I care?

- Don't make no faces.

Just eat your soup.

- Will you stop talking
and let me eat my soup?

- Well, go ahead and eat it.

(Chester coughing softly)

What's the matter, you
got a frog in your throat?

- Of course not.

(Chester yelps)

- I'm sorry, it's the way he eats at home.

He don't know any...

What's the matter?

What?
(clapping)

Yeah, the soup, go ahead.

No, you can't dive into it.

Just eat it.

What's the matter with you?

Something wrong?

What is it?

You've got a tongue, haven't you?

Yeah, all right, well, what?

Huh?

(Chester shushing)

You're trying to say something.

(Chester mumbles)

Well, bring it out, bring it out.

(Chester wheezing)

It's a fine conversation.

(Chester wheezes)

Very interesting.

Eat your soup.

- Duke, will you eat my soup
and let me eat your soup?

- Will that make you happy?

- Very happy.
- My goodness, take it.

Go ahead.

- Thank you ever so much.

There you are.

All right, I'll take care of it.

Don't worry about it.
- Thank you very much.

- It's all right. Go ahead.

- How is it?

- You heard what the widow said.

- Mm-hm.
- Her soup speaks for itself.

- Not only that, it will talk back to you.

- Oh, you don't know what
you're talking about.

- I don't. Go ahead.

- [Duke] What are you, expecting company?

- No, but you are.

(whistles loudly)

- All right, all right, all right.

- You eat too dainty!

- Quiet.

- Go on, eat.

- Delicious.

- Dig right in!

Go right like that, then.

(frog croaking)

It ain't nice to do those things.

- Will you please make up your
mind, and get settled here?

Go ahead and eat your soup.

- Eat yours.

(frog sputtering)

(soup splashing)

(children shouting)

(sighs loudly)

What a night.

♪ I love the stars ♪

♪ I love the moon I

♪ I'd love December if it came in June ♪

♪I♪

Yi-yi-yi.

- Lovely!

(Mrs. Hawkins chuckles)
- Did you like it?

- Uh-huh.

Sit down, Mr. Wooley.

- [Chester] Thank you.

(gentle music)

- Loose your tie.

Go ahead, loose your tie.

- I don't know you that well.

- Oh, land sakes, man.

I want you to make yourself to home.

Now, Mr. Wooley, I ain't a
person to beat around the bush.

I'm a woman, you're a man.

- Mrs. Hawkins, that's the nicest thing

anybody ever said to me.

- Oh, well, Mr. Wooley, Chester,

a woman means a lot to a man,

and a man can mean a lot to a woman.

Me and Hawkins didn't get along.

He never come home.

Oh, I've been a lonesome woman around here

these past few years.

- I know just how you feel.

I've been awful lonesome myself.

- Have you?!

Mr. Wooley, haven't you ever
wanted somebody waiting for you

when you come home at night?

Somebody to...

Somebody to kiss you when
you open the front door?

Someone whose hair you
caress with a loving touch?

Someone whose presence
would cheer and warm you?

Haven't you ever wanted to
embark on the sea of matrimony?

Your boat of bridal
wreath and orange blossoms

crosses the shoals of acquaintance

into the sea of affection.

The tempest of love causes
the waves of emotion

to toss you helter-skelter,
hither and thither,

here and yon, round and round.

- Stop, stop.

Stop the boat.

I'm getting seasick.

- Mr. Wooley, I'm not a forward woman.

All my life, I've been shy and bashful,

just a rosebud afraid to bloom.

But now, I'm taking the bull by the horns!

Sit down!

I've been trying to convey
to you in an indirect way

that I'd consider matrimony.

That is, after you've been here a bit.

- You mean, me and you get married?

- Will you?

- Shh.

We shouldn't let the children hear this.

- Uh-uh.
- Shh, shh, shh.

(playful music)

No.

Duke.

Duke.

The widow wants to marry me.

- Well, congratulations.

My little pal embarking
on the sea of matrimony.

- Stop, stop, stop.
- In a boat--

- I just made that trip, and
I am not going to get married.

- I wouldn't be so hasty, Mr. Wooley.

There's ways of making you
change your mind, and you too!

Now get to bed.

There's work to be done in the morning.

(whistles loudly)

(dog barking)

Watch 'em, Wolf.

- I don't like the looks of this.

We better get out of here.

- You mean you think we
should make a getaway?

(dog barking)

- [Duke] Now wait a minute.

Wait a minute.

- Duke, that dog knows
what we're talking about.

- Well, that's silly.

How does the dog know
that you said "getaway"?

(dog barking)

(dog growling)
(Chester whimpers)

- Duke, don't say those words.

Nice doggy, nice doggy.

Lie down.

Lie down.

Uh-oh.
(Chester whistles)

Hey, Duke, I think I got him fooled.

When he ain't looking,
we'll make a G-E-T-A-W-A-Y.

(dog barking)

How do you like that?

He can spell too.

- Chester, we've got to find some way

of getting rid of that dog.

- Duke, fire stick.

- [Duke] Right.

- Nice doggy.
- Nice doggy.

Hold it.
- Nice doggy.

- Sit still.
- Nice doggy.

Duke.
- Sit still.

- Duke. Nice dog.

You go out and open up the door.

- Yeah, well, watch out, hold him.

- Nice doggy.

(dog growling)

Don't bite.

Look, doggy.

(Chester mumbling)

- Show him the stick.
- Come on, come on.

- Show him the stick.
- Doggy, come on.

- Come on.
- Come on.

- Give him the stick.
- Come on.

(dog barks)
(Chester yelps)

Take it easy now.

- Come on, out the door.
- Here, doggy.

Doggy, doggy-
- Make him come.

(dog barking)

- Shut the door, shut it!
(lively music)

(gun fires)

We were just on our way to bed.

Nighty-nighty-nighty.

(rooster crowing)
(gentle music)

(dog barking)

Hey, hey!

(loud chomp)
(Chester yelps)

That ain't fair, it's cold down here,

and furthermore, you got your coat on.

- [Mrs. Hawkins] And why
haven't you, Mr. Wooley?

- Well...

- It's time you were dressed.

There's the water to be
drawn, the cow to be milked,

the chicken coop to be fixed,
the fence whitewashed, the--

- I'll get the children up to help me.

- Don't you dare.

After all, you're not
their father, Mr. Wooley.

Or has your heart softened?

(loud thudding)

- No, ma'am.

- Then get to work.

The lower 40 needs plowing,
the harness needs sewing,

the fence needs fixing,
the butter needs churning--

- If I do all that work today,

I'll have nothing left for tomorrow.

- Don't worry, I'll think of something,

that is unless you've
reconsidered my offer of marriage.

- Mrs. Hawkins, marriage is
nothing but a three-ring circus.

First, the engagement ring,
and then the wedding ring,

and then suffering.

Duke.

Duke.
(loud chomp)

I'm not gonna take the bed.

You can stay there.
- What do you want?

- Hey, Duke, oh, the widow's awful mad.

She's gonna work my head off.

Will you help me?

- All right, I'll help you.

- Good.
- I'll stay here

and watch the kids.

(Chester groaning)

(loud chomp)
(Chester yelps)

(gentle music)

Oh.

Here's the water.

- Now look what you've done!

No water, no breakfast!

Get going!

(lively music)

(lever clacking)

(kick thudding)

(lever clacking)

(kick thudding)

(lever clacking)

(lever clacking)

- [Chester] Here's the water.

- [Mrs. Hawkins] Pour it in the kettle.

- [Chester] Yes, ma'am.

- [Matt] Oh, boy, am I full!

- [Girl] Oughta be after
all those pancakes.

- [Boy] How about those six eggs he ate?

- [Matt] Aw, shut up.

- [Chester] Mrs. Hawkins--

- Dinner will be at noon.

- But I haven't had my breakfast.

- Them that ain't here on time don't eat.

- If I don't eat, I can't work.

- Well, it's your own fault.

Mr. Wooley, I'm a tenderhearted woman.

I'm filled with the
milk of human kindness.

I'm overflowing with the love of mankind.

Mine is a tender heart, ever
ready to take into its fold

the tired, the sick, the weary.

Do you get what I'm driving at?

- Yes, ma'am, but you're
trying to hitch up

to the wrong horse.

Why don't you make Duke do some work?

- Chester, I hate to admit this,

but I had to tell Mrs. Hawkins
about my heart trouble.

- Heart trouble?!
- Hey, don't shout.

Don't shout like that.

- You--
- No, no, no, no.

Work makes me sick.

I guess I'll just have to lie around.

- Yes, and that won't
be hard for you to do.

You're the best liar around these parts.

- Don't talk to Mr. Egan like that.

Now get to work.

Betsy needs shoeing, 50's
I can drive her to town.

The children will meet you
in the barn, point her out.

Now get!

(Chester whimpering)

- Mrs. Hawkins, 1--
- Get!

Heart trouble.

Wish I'd have thought of it.

(Chester whimpering)

(playful music)

Which one is Betsy?

- That's Betsy.

- That one?
- Yup.

- Well, your mother
said I got to shoe her.

(horse whinnying)
(loud thudding)

- [Mrs. Hawkins] Land sakes,
what's the commotion?!

- [Matt] Mr. Wooley's
shoeing Betsy, so he thinks.

(Matt laughs)

- [Mrs. Hawkins] Mr.
Wooley, what on Earth?!

- [Chester] I had to lend her mine.

Come on.

- [Chester] Shh.

- [Duke] What are you
making all this noise for?

I can't sleep.

Give me that brush.

- Mrs. Hawkins, I'm not
gonna do it anymore.

I'm getting dishpan hands.

- It's your own fault.

Keep on scrubbing!

You make it around to the
front of the house quick!

There's gonna be trouble.

Juanita's talking on the
front porch with Jake Frame,

and I just saw Jim Simpson
coming down the road!

- I've had enough trouble with Jake Frame.

Wooley, chase him off the place!

Get going!

Mr. Wooley, when I tell
you to do something,

don't stop and play!

Come on!

Mr. Wooley, I want you to throw

that ornery skunk off my property!

- [Jim] I was fixing to
do that, Mrs. Hawkins.

- Well, why don't you
start trying to do it?

- This is a family affair, Jim.

Throw him out!

- Mr. Frame?

He don't wanna go.
- Oh.

- Jake only came here to get my answer

about coming to work at the Round-Up.

- There's that little matter of $1,100

still owed me by your late
husband, Mrs. Hawkins.

- And I think it's right generous of Jake

to want to give me a chance
to pay off the family debt.

- Young lady, as long
as I'm your guardian,

you will never step inside that saloon.

- Good for you, Wooley!

Watch out for the flowers.

- Hey.
- Well, I still have

got Hawkins's IOUs.

And if Juanita doesn't
come to work for me,

somebody else is gonna work off that debt.

- You know, Mrs. Hawkins,

working in a saloon might be
good experience for a girl.

- According to the law, Wooley,
that's your responsibility.

- But I work here all day!

- In that case, you'll
work for me all night.

Be at the Round-Up at seven.

(people chattering)
(lively piano music)

- Widow's on the warpath.

She's not getting enough work out of you.

You'd better do something about it.

- Do you think she could
use a 75-year-old man?

- 75?

- That's how old I'm gonna be
before I pay back Jake Frame

all the money I owe him.

Talking about money, this
is all the money I've made

since I've been working here.

Some guy tipped me a big penny,

thought he was doing me a big favor.

- Say, that's a 20-dollar gold piece.

- What's what?

- Chester, we're on our way.

We'll ride that 20-dollar gold
piece straight to California.

- Ain't it a little small
for both of us to sit on?

- I'm going in that poker
game, then watch my smoke.

- Suppose you lose?

- Oh, no, no, certainly not.

With your help, I can't.

Come here.

Well, what do you boys do?

- Bet 50.

- I'll see that, and up it 100.

- I'll call that, and
I'll raise it a hundred.

- Oh, let's bump it again.

- [Man] That's a raise.

- I'll see that, and
up it another hundred.

- That's all for me.

- I'll call that.

I got a straight.

- All blue, boys.

- [Man With Cigar] Back
to the mines for me.

- What do you know?
- Sure had a lucky streak.

- Finished with me too.
- How much did we win?

- Well, not enough to pay off everything,

but a couple more games like this

and we're on our way to California.

- Good.
- Cash me in.

- Look, don't let Frame
know that we won this money.

- No.
- We're gonna...

Frame.

- That's me.

- Frame!

- Frame.

Here you are, put your
ashes right in here.

I'm so busy and so tired, Mr. Frame.

- [Joe] Here it is.

- Looks like you had a
streak of luck, Egan.

How about you and me sitting
down to a couple of hands?

Head-and-head.
- Oh, no, he can't.

He's gotta go home right away.

Mrs. Hawkins is waiting for him.

- [Mrs. Hawkins] Oh, no, I ain't!

- Oh, yes, you!

- I'm here to see you, Frame.

You and me's got to have a
showdown about Wooley here.

- Wooley's going home.

- Stay where you are.

This day and night work ain't working out.

He no more gets through working for me

when he goes to work for you.

Then he no more gets
through working for you

when he goes to work for me.

He'll be an old man before his time.

- My offer still stands.

I'll be glad to replace him for Juanita.

- Juanita's staying
home where she belongs.

- Well, in that case,
we can't do business.

Or maybe we can.

I was just talking to Egan
here about a little poker game.

We'll play it three ways.

We each get a stack of chips.

Egan here puts up his roll
against our interest in Wooley.

Whoever wins all the chips

gets the money and full
possession of Wooley.

- [Duke] Oh, no, you can count me out.

- Oh, no, Duke.

- No.
- Go ahead and play.

If you win, I'm free.

- No, I...

Yeah, yeah, all right, I'm in!

- How about you, Mrs. Hawkins?

- I don't believe in gambling, Mr. Frame.

Gambling's a sinful, crime-breeding curse!

It...

Where's the cards?

- [Jake] Sit down, Mrs. Hawkins.

I'll take over, Joe.

- There you are.

Wait a minute, wait a minute.

Women first.

How about Mrs. Hawkins dealing?

- Land sakes, all I know about cards

is what Hawkins told me.

I never played before.

- We won't have any trouble with her.

- Certainly not.

(Chester chuckles)

- You never played cards before?

- Uh-uh.

- Cut 'em.
- Cut 'em?

Where'd you learn that?

- Hawkins.
- Hawkins.

You heard what the lady said, cut 'em.

- Ante up.

Hawkins.

- [Both] Hawkins.

(Chester whimpers)

- [Jake] I'll open.

- I'll stay.

- What do I do now?

- Give me two cards.

- I'll take one.

- I'm standing pat.

- Hawkins?

- [Mrs. Hawkins] Mm.

- [Jake] Two reds.

- Well...

I'll see your two, and I'll raise you two.

- I don't want to cast any reflections,

but person has to think twice

before bucking luck like both of yours.

You may have me beat,
then again, you mightn't.

Wooley, stop skittering.

And put that spittoon down.

- I gotta--
- Put it down!

- Yes, ma'am.

- I'll see your bet,
and sweeten it a little.

- [Jake] I'll stay.

- Well, I'll see that,
and I'll raise you two.

- I'll tell you what,

let's get this over with in one hand.

Shoot the works.

- All I can lose is Wooley,
and that ain't much.

I'm in.

(Chester gasps)

(loud thud)
- Overworked.

Let him lay.

Needs the rest.

- [Duke] You pay him, dear.

- Sure.

- [Bartender] Thank you.

- You see, I have invested all my cash

in Widow Hawkins's property.

I've got a fat deal there though.

Oh, it'll come out swell--
- Duke.

Duke.
- Pardon me just a minute.

- We've got to get out,
or I'm gonna be a bride.

- [Duke] Oh, beat it.

I'm trying to do a little promoting.

- Got a lot of symphony I get from you.

- [Duke] Go ahead.

Sweetheart, how would you like

to finance an expedition to California?

- [Jake] Wooley, come here.

- [Chester] Would you excuse me, please?

- Okay, bub.

(Chester coughs)
(head thuds)

- I thought you went home with the widow.

- I did, but I came back again.

Mr. Frame, I wish you'd
won me in the game.

Working here is much
easier than marrying her.

- So that's it.

Wooley, I'm beginning to
really feel sorry for you.

How would you like to earn
a couple of fast horses

and a stake to California?

- 0h, gee, if you'd give us the horses,

you can forget the steak.

I'm not hungry, just tired.

- Well, now, a miner friend of mine

is getting a little worried

about the amount of gold he's got on hand.

Now, if you can get the information

from your friend, Jim Simpson,

as to when the next bullion
shipment is coming through,

I can ship my friend's gold along with it.

- You mean if I go over and ask him that,

you'll give us the horses?

- That's right, he's over at the bar.

- I'll go over and ask him.

- Only don't give him any reasons.

My friend wants to keep it confidential.

- Oh, secret.

You don't want the stage holdup
guys to find out about it.

- [Jake] That's right.

- I won't tell them.

I won't tell nobody but you.

I'm smart.

I got brains I haven't used yet.

- Well, don't let them go to your head.

- Hello, Chester.

- Just the man I'm looking for.

- Well, what'll it be?

- I'll have a shot of milk.

Make it a double.

- What do you want to talk to me about?

- Shh, shh, shh.

When is the next gold shipment coming in?

- Why do you want to know?

- Mr. Frame says I mustn't tell.

But if I find out, he
will do me a big favor.

- 0h.

Well, in that case, I'll be glad to help.

- The next shipment's clue on Thursday.

- Thursday?

(Chester gasps)

Oh, good.

Let's have a drink on that.

Thursday. Good luck.

(wheezes)

Thursday.

- [Jim] Thursday.

- Hey, what's up?

You know the gold's coming
through on Wednesday.

- Which means that we can set a trap

for Frame and his gang the day after,

and catch 'em robbing
the coach red-handed.

- Sweetheart, California's the
land of golden opportunity.

Why, you'll have a stocking full of gold.

- [Woman] Well, honey, I've got that now,

and I'm gonna keep it.

- Duke, we're practically
on our way to California.

- What are you talking about?

- The gold shipment is coming in Thursday.

Now, all I've got to do is tell Frame,

then he'll give us a couple
of horses, the money,

and we're on our way.

- You can't tell him that.

He's the one they suspect.

- Suspect of what?

- Of all the stagecoach robberies.

- 0h.

Now what am I gonna do?

- Tell him the shipment's
going through Wednesday.

In that way, you'll be doing yourself

and the Citizens' Committee a big favor.

- Tell him Wednesday?
- Yes.

- Yeah.

Then when he finds out,
what will he do to me?

- By that time, we'll be
on our way to California.

Come on.

- Mr. Frame.

Wednesday.
- Good.

- When do we get the horses?

- They'll be in the barn Wednesday night

after I've checked your information.

- Mr. Frame...

You and your big ideas.

Now I'm in worse trouble.

- But if you tell Frame the truth,

think of the hole it'll put Jim in.

- Duke, if Frame finds out I'm lying,

think of the hole he'll put me in.

(people cheering)

I was just coming home.

- I'll take care of you later.

Where's Juanita?

- She should be home in bed.

- Well, she should be, but she ain't.

♪ Fail to keep your hands I

♪ In your pocket ♪
- That's her voice.

♪ And your feet on the ground ♪
- She's in there.

- She can't be, we just left there.

- Well, now you're going back in.

Egan, find Jim Simpson and bring him here.

Lead the way, Wooley.

- You heard what Ma said.

- "Lead the way, Wooley."

I Make the cash box
ring, ting, ting-a-ling ♪

♪ Before the night's any older I

♪ Set 'em up, Bill, and fill up the till ♪

♪ If you have gold, then you're welcome I

- Juanita!

Juanita!

(people shouting)

Shut up, yourselves!

♪ You can have what's nice
if you have the price ♪

- Wooley, go up there and
drag her off that stage!

- Me?
- Yes, you!

Ain't you the one that forbid her

to set a foot in this place?!

Go on, go ahead!

♪ You've got I
- Juanita?

♪ Everything I want ♪
- Your mama wants you

to go home.

♪ And I want I
- Sit down!

♪ Everything you've got I

♪So♪

- Get her off there, Wooley!

- All right.
♪ We gotta make dough ♪

- Juanita, you've gotta
come home with the family.

(people shouting)

- No!
- Juanita, come on home.

Your mama wants you!

- Juanita, come on home!

- [Man With Gun] Wait a minute!

Frame says let her stay.

- And I say, take her out!

- I gotta take her out.
- Stop that!

- Ow!
- Ma!

(foot
stom
- 0h! ps)

(hand slaps)
- Leave that child alone!

- Are you gonna let her
get up on that stage?!

(children screaming)

Are you?!
- Shut up!

- Go ahead.

Go ahead and shoot me
and inherit this family.

Go ahead.

- Not me.
- Oh, come on.

- Oh, no!

Now, I don't want 'em.
- You don't want 'em?

- [Mrs. Hawkins] Quiet, all of you.

- He don't want 'em?

Oh.

Anybody else want my job?

- No.
- Huh?!

- No.

No.
- Huh?!

Anybody wanna take my job?!

Juanita, you heard your mother.

Home. Come on.

- [Mrs. Hawkins] Come on!

- Come on. Home.

(mug crashes)

(snaps fingers)

- Wooley!
- Yeah?

- Look at that.

Not a man in town who'd
dare lay a hand on him.

- Hey, Jim, are you thinking
the same thing I am?

-Iam.

There you are, Chester.

Now you can take your place

with the famous sheriffs of the West.

- Why didn't you hire one of them?

- They're all dead.

- They're all dead?

Dead?
- Don't worry, Chester.

Keep this picture with you always

and show it when you have to,

and you'll bear a charmed life.

- Suppose I should happen to
meet some nearsighted gunman?

- That'll be his tough luck.

- Oh, I see.

And if he kills me, he'll have
to take care of the widow.

That would make him a dead duck.

(laughs)

And me too.

- Where's the sheriff?!

Where's the sheriff?!

There's gonna be lead flying
at the Round-Up any minute.

Some drunk's fixing for a fight.

- Chester?

Where'd he go?

- [Chester] He went thataway!

- Oh, Chester, get up out of there.

This is your big chance.

- Go over and tell 'em
to stop the shooting,

or you'll run 'em all in!

- Show 'em you're not afraid!

Go on in there, draw your
guns, throw out your chest.

- And they'll fill it full of holes.

- Go ahead, 90 ahead.
- Duke, don't push.

- Go ahead, 90 ahead.
- All right, all right.

All right. don't push.

I didn't get this badge for nothing.

- Go ahead.

That boy's got what it takes.

- I don't wanna go.
(loud slap)

I'll go.

- You just get us some
law and order, Wooley,

and we'll get the railroad to
come through Wagon Gap yet.

- Remember, Wooley, I'm donating you

in the interest of good government.

Me and the family are
with you all the way.

- I'm depending on it.

Oh, yes.

Oh.

- Mrs. Hawkins--
- Oh, go on down there

and act like a sheriff,

or I'll send you to the ranch
and really put you to work.

- All right.

Oh.

- Law and order.

If you had any nerve,

you'd go in there and stop them yourself.

- Well, if this doesn't work--

- You'll think of something
else for somebody else to do.

- [Man] I'm in town for a good time, see?

(gun firing)

I'll blast your heads off.

- Stop disgracing me.

Haven't you got any red
blood in your veins?

- Yes, and I'm gonna keep it there too.

- 0h, 90 on in.

- Don't move, anybody, see.

If you're tired of living,
come on, we'll shoot it out.

(gun firing)

I don't want another
word outta any of you.

Oh, no, you don't.

- Now you fellas in here
will have to stop shooting

because you're making a lot of noise.

The horses out here are
jumping up and down.

They're scaring the women.

Now remember,

don't aggravate me.

No more shooting.

(gun fires)

(gun thudding)

Now look, everybody, now
this shooting has gotta stop!

(whimpering softly)

(man laughs)

- Hey, little boy.

You, fat little boy.

You, come here, little boy.

(man laughs)

Hey, little boy, what are you
doing wearing a man's pants?

- I'm the new sheriff.

I want law and order.

- You take care of the
law, and I'll order.

What'll you have?

- I don't drink whiskey.

It goes to my head.

- Well, that's just great.

I'll put it right on your
head, and I'll shoot it off.

- That's much better because
the other way, I get sick.

What am I saying?
- Get it back up there,

or I'll drill you through and through.

- Look, mister, please don't.

I didn't want to get in this mess.

I didn't ask to be the sheriff.

It's all her fault.

It's her fault, right here.

Go ahead and shoot me.

You can have her.

- The Widow Hawkins.

That drunk I'm not.

- Come on, everybody up!

- Everybody up, you heard--
- Shut up, shut, shut up.

- Yes, sir. Yes, sir.

- Come on, get those tables up.

Put your shooting irons out on
the table, every one of you.

Come on.

Get 'em up there.

Hey, you, get this roof
fixed, and don't forget it!

- [Man] You heard the sheriff.

Get this roof--
- Shut up!

- [Man] Yes, sir.

- From now on, I want you
all to treat me with respect

and very little of that.

Go on back to your tables.

- You heard the sheriff!

- Shut up!
- Yes, sir.

(glass crashes)

- Go on!

- You heard the sheriff!

- [Mrs. Hawkins] Land sakes, he's done it!

- That's my boy.

- Yes.

You can all go back to
your homes now, folks.

There'll be no more shooting in Wagon Gap.

(people cheering)

(guns firing)

(man laughs)

- The sawed-off runt's scared.

- What sawed-off runt are
you calling a sawed-off runt?

- You, fatso.

Any objections?

- Yeah.

- Oh, I must've meant somebody else.

- I guess you did.

- [Man] Yeah.

- Here.

(match scratches)

You're too young to smoke cigarettes.

Just a minute.

I don't want you going around

calling anybody here a sawed-off runt,

or I'll run you outta town.

And I'm the sawed-off
runt that can do it too.

- Yes, sir.

(Chester chuckles)

- Chester, you're wonderful!

I'm proud of you.

- Ma'am, while I'm wearing
this badge of office,

I'll have no hugging
and chalking in public.

And another thing--
- Yes?

- That goes for any other place too.

- Mr. Wooley, I'm apologizing.

- Don't let it happen again, ma'am.

- I won't, Chester.

- See what I mean?

I'm not to be trifled with.

- Chester, I wouldn't overdo it.

If you get the widow mad,
she'll really pour it on you.

- 0h.

So you're still hanging around
trying to tell me what to do.

- 0h, now--
- Now listen, you.

If you don't start working regular

and show some means of support,

I'm gonna run you in as a vagrant!

- But, Chester, I'm your pal.

You owe everything to me.

- And I am a man that pays off.

- What?
- I'm gonna start

paying you off right now.

I'm gonna make you my deputy.

- Aw.

Well, you really are my pal.
- You like that?

- Swell.
- Now, your first duty

is to get to the ranch
and take over my chores!

- Me?!
- Yes, you!

You've been bossing me around long enough!

Now the worm has turned,
and every dog has his day.

Now get out!

- Wait a minute, just (mumbles).

- Partner, when you say that, smile.

- [Woman In Dark Dress]
Good morning, Sheriff.

- [Woman In Light Dress]
Good morning, Sheriff.

- Good morning, ladies.

Good morning.

(Chester whistling)

- [Joe] Howdy, Sheriff.

- Hello, Joe!

(Chester whistling)

Juanita, how are you?

Where's your mama?
- She just came into town.

She's right over there.

- Goodbye.

(Mrs. Hawkins yelping)

- Wait a minute, Sheriff Wooley.

I brought you your dinner.

It's roast beef today.

- Roast beef, just when I
was in the mood for chicken.

- Well, now I got chicken
stewing for supper.

I'll just send Egan
here back to the ranch--

- Never mind, no need.

Roast beef will do.

You wait here for me.

I'm going over there to the saloon

to stop them from fighting.

- They're not fighting in there now.

- I know, but why wait
until the last minute?

- I'll be right back, I've gotta see

somebody about something.

(people chattering)

- [Man] Hey, there's the sheriff.

- The sheriff.
- It's the sheriff.

- You don't all have to stop
talking on account of me!

(people chattering)

Shut up!

What'd you say?

- I didn't say nothing.

- Well, don't say it again.

Come on, folks, everybody
have a good time.

Enjoy yourselves.

But don't nobody sneak up behind me.

(Chester yelping)

- Put the gun away.

Chester, the widow is working me to death.

- So?

- We've gotta get out of town.

Now's our chance.

Tonight, you arrest me,
and throw me in jail.

Then we get away while the town's asleep.

You like that?
- Only the part

about putting you in jail.

- Don't tell me you're
starting to like it here.

- Yes, being sheriff has its advantages.

- Now, listen, Chester--
- Get your hands off me.

Get 'em off!

(Duke coughs)

- [Chester] Mm.

(snaps fingers)

- I've had enough of your flirting.

I'm through arguing.

If another man even looks
at you, I'll kill him.

Why, you...

Hello, Sheriff.

Have another one.

It's on me.

- Chester, you're living
in a fool's paradise.

It's not you they're
afraid of, it's the widow.

And speaking of the widow,
she's out to marry you or else.

- Or else what?

- Or else she'll find
somebody else to marry.

Oh, then what?

Without her protection,

you'd just be another little fat man,

and a lovely target for these men

that you've been pushing around.

- Oh, who would want to marry the widow?

- Who?
- Who.

Nobody.

Come on, everybody.

Drinks are on the sheriff!

(people shouting)

- Who would marry the widow?

Judge.
- Huh?

- Sit down and have a drink.

It's a little crowded over there.

- But it's free at the bar.

- Bartender, milk for everybody.

- [Bartender] Milk?

- What's the matter, any objections?

Milk!

- Milk.

My boy, I should've listened
to you in the first place.

- I have something else I
think you'd like to listen to.

Have you heard the news about the railroad

coming through the widow's property?

- No.

- They're buying her
property for a right-of-way.

- You don't say.

That'll probably make her the
richest woman in the state.

- [Judge Benbow] Hmm.

- Bottoms up.

Bottoms up.

(sighs)

Drink up.

- This stuff will ruin a man's stomach.

- So will this.

- Looks like the little fat boy

is gonna keep dealing us misery.

- We'll worry about him later.

Right now, we've got
the stage to think of.

- Hey, Duke.

- [Duke] What's the matter?

- What day is today?

- Wednesday.

- Thought so.

(Chester whistles)

(Chester laughs)

Jim, is Frame and his
gang gonna be fooled.

- [Jim] What are you getting at?

- You know you told me
that the gold shipment

was coming in tomorrow?

- [Jim] Yeah.

- I told him it was coming in today.

Ha, pretty smart, huh?

- Well, it was my suggestion.

Send 'em on a wild goose chase.

- [Jim] Well, the gold
is coming through today.

- [Both] What?!

- That wild goose chase of yours

is gonna lay a golden egg for Frame.

- Sheriff, try to get through
and head off the stage

before it reaches Dead Man's Pass.

I'll round up the men and follow.

- I get it.

We stop the stage,

the bandits are waiting for the stage,

and then you show up instead of the stage.

- Hey, that's well-staged.

- [Jim] Exactly.

Providing, of course, you reach the stage.

(Chester chuckles)

- Don't worry about that.

I ain't got that for nothing.
- Yeah, sure.

- Madam, you'll have to get
down off that buckboard.

We're going after the bandits!

- Yeah.
- Come on now,

you'll have to make it snappy!

- Go ahead.
- Come on now.

- Hey, wait a minute, what do you mean

we're going after the bandits?

Hey, you're the sheriff.
- What?

- You wanna play tag with the
bandits, go ahead and play--

- Just a minute, you.
- 0h, take it easy.

- I deputized you, didn't I?

Now get in there and start driving.

- Wooley, I'm agin the whole idea.

When you start riding by those bandits,

they're liable to get
excited and start shooting.

- Don't worry.

They're not crazy.
- Well, I am worried.

I'm just sentimental enough not
to want my intended shot up.

- Madam, it's about time

that you and I had an understanding.

Now, you may be intending, but I'm not.

Now step aside and let me do my duty.

- Don't rile me, Mr. Wooley.

Remember, it's me that's protecting you.

And if you want to keep that protection,

you better be thinking
about us getting wed.

- I got all the protection
I need right here.

Now, go on home before I
throw you in the hoosegow

for trying to scare the sheriff.

- Mrs. Hawkins, I've been considering

making you a proposition.

- Ain't got time, Judge.

- I can wait.

Wedding bells and train
whistles, most melodious.

Yes, indeedy.

Yes, indeedy.

(lively music)

- What are you slowing down for?

Come on, get going.

- 0h, Chester, let's
not pass up this chance.

We have horses and a wagon.

Nobody's watching.

California's out that way.

- What kind of a sheriff
do you think I am?

I was put in office to uphold the law.

And you're my deputy,
and you're gonna help me.

Now, come on, get going.

- Sure, the bandits might not shoot you,

but it's open season on me.

- You got nothing to worry
about, nothing at all.

You're safe as long as
I've got this picture.

- What's the matter?

What's the matter?

- Picture's gone.

- Gone?
- It's gone.

Duke.
- What?

- Don't go another step.

Hold the horses.

Don't go no further, Duke.

- Well, the bandits are
right down that road.

Should I keep going?

- No.

No.

Duke.
- What?

- Which way does that road 90?

- To California.
- California?

California.

There.

(thrilling orchestral music)

The widow.

- Just had a faint notion
you'd be heading this way

once you found the picture gone.

Let's ride back together.

You and me can discuss terms
for keeping my protection.

What do you say?

- Giddy up!

(thrilling orchestral music)

- Mr. Wooley!

Mr. Wooley!

- [Man] Hurry up, get down off of there.

Keep your hands up.

Get over here. Come on.

Get over.

(thrilling orchestral music)

- Frame. Frame!

(loud crash)

- Sheriff.

- [Mrs. Hawkins] Mr. Wooley!

Mr. Wooley!

- Widow.

Yah!

- [Mrs. Hawkins] Why, Wooley.

- Now we lost the gold.

Why didn't you shoot the sheriff?

- Why didn't you?!

- Me?!

And have her chasing me instead of him?

Uh-uh!

(thrilling orchestral music)

- [Jim] Where's the sheriff?

(thrilling orchestral music)

- It's here, Jim.

He did it.

He saved the gold!

- [Duke] Well, if I wouldn't have seen it,

I wouldn't believe.

- Aw, shucks, it was nothing.

I went for my guns, and
they went for the hills.

Or vice versa.

- Wooley.

Wooley.

Wooley, you're a hero.

I seen it with my own eyes.

You don't need my picture to be brave.

- How did you--
- But I'd like you to have it,

Chester, to keep close to your heart.

- Thank you, ma'am.

I sure will.

- Those bandits were Frame and his gang.

I recognized them.

- Well, this is it.

They're probably on their
way back to the Round-Up.

Phil, take a bunch of men and ride ahead.

We're gonna get 'em.

- Now wait a minute, Jim.

There's no need of bloodshed.

I'm going in to bring that
gang in single-handed.

- [Duke] But you're only one man.

- There's only one gang, ain't there?

Well, I'll see you all later.

So long!

What happened there? Which way?

How do you get outta here?
- Just go ahead.

Get on your horse.
- Okay.

- Fine bunch of soft-headed
idiots I tied in with.

- I didn't notice you
taking a shot at him.

- Hmm, leaving town, I see.

Not a bad idea.

- Yes, and it's all your fault.

You and your fancy laws.

That fat, tubby sheriff's
got everyone hog-tied.

- Not necessarily, Jake.

If someone would marry the widow,

that would relieve the culprit

of his responsibilities, also his power.

- [Jake] Huh, any of you boys
want to cut yourselves in?

- I'd rather leave town.
- Not me.

- I was speaking of myself.

- [Jake] I thought you
could hold your liquor

better than that.

- I'm cold sober, Jake.

It's just that I desire to settle down

in my declining years.

Although the money the little woman

will receive from the railroad company,

which is coming through her property,

has a slight attraction.

(chuckles)

- Oh, so that's it.

I'm sorry, Judge,

but if anybody's in line
for that money, it's me.

As the one who really killed Hawkins,

it's high time I confessed.

And I'll thank you to appoint
me the family guardian.

- No deal, Jake.

That's merely hearsay testimony,

and I can't accept it as evidence.

- In that case, I'll shoot
the little butterball

and inherit the family from him!

- You'll have to beat me to it, Jake.

This is my deal!

- Hey, the sheriff is
coming to take you in.

(men shouting)

(gun thudding)

- Order!

If we're not careful, we'll
be shooting each other.

- The judge is right, it's
every man for himself.

But the shot closest to the heart wins.

- And to avoid any
argument, mark your bullets.

This thing's got to be
done nice and legal.

(people chattering)

- Wait a minute!

Chester, 90 on in there,
but bring 'em out alive.

- Don't worry about me.

Worry about yourselves, all of you.

Now take cover.

I don't want any of you getting hurt!

Go on, take cover!
- Come on, Hawkins.

(dramatic music)

- Here's to the widow.

- And her money.

- May the best shot win.

- Here's where I get rich.

- I never missed a sheriff in my life.

Here's to it.

- Hey!

Here he comes.

(window crashing)

(dramatic music)

- Frame, I want you and your gang

to come out with your hands up,

or I'm a-coming in a-shooting!

(gun fires)

I'll--
(gun fires)

(guns firing)

(veIPS)

Now listen, Frame, someone
is liable to get hurt!

(guns firing)

- Those dirty skunks,
shooting at Mr. Wooley.

- Isn't it about time somebody
on our side used a gun?

- It is.

Phil, take 10 men and break
in through the back entrance.

- All right, Jim.
- Rest of you men

come with me, we'll draw their
fire to keep them up front.

Wooley, you stay here with the women.

- Thanks.

(gun fires)

(guns firing)

- Jim Simpson and the Citizens' Committee.

Barricade the doors and windows.

Get back here, you yellow-livered skunks!

This brawl's gonna decide
who runs this town,

and it's time you started picking sides!

(guns firing)

- Unless something or somebody
draws their attention,

Jim and them fellers are goners.

- I'll do it!

They won't dare shoot a woman!

- No, you won' , you have
a family to think of.

Chester here will do it.

Shut up!

- But I didn't say (sputters).

I didn't say anything.

- Well, that's in case you do.

- What's that?

- Duke, get around and
tell Phil to hurry up.

Jim needs help.

- Look, when Chester gets there,

they'll stop shooting at Jim, but I'll go.

- Are you sure this is gonna work?

- [Mrs. Hawkins] Even Frame
wouldn't shoot a woman.

- Why don't we all go?

- That's a good--
- 0h!

(Chester sputters)
Come on, Wooley, get going.

Pick up the clubs, girls.

Come on, lead the way, Wooley!

Go on, lead the way.

Come on, Wooley.

(guns firing)

- Hold your fire, men.

Hold it.

(gun fires)
- Hold your fire!

You women go home where you belong.

This is a man's fight.

- All right, girls.

Forward!

Frame, we're coming in.

- The sheriff.

(gun clicks)

(Ches
ter gas
- 0h! ps)

(gun fires)

- Hey, hey.

Frame!
(women shouting)

(people shouting)

(chair crashes)

(punches thudding)

(mug crashes)

(mug crashes)

Hey.

(loud thud)

(chandelier thuds)

- Hawkins.

- Duke!

(m Oh!
ug crashes)

(table crashes)

(mug thuds)

(mug thuds)

- I'll show you we'll have
law and order in this place!

(mug crashes)

- Oh, you poor little thing.

(gun fires)

(window crashes)

- Frame!

(gun fires)

Come on.

Come on.

(gun firing)

You might as well quit, boys!

You're all through in this town.

- Yeah.

Corral 'em all and take
'em to the hoosegow!

I'll see that you all get
life, and maybe longer!

- The federal marshal will take care

of that for you, Chester.

We're riding the whole bunch
into Butte to turn 'em over.

- Okay, you got my permission.

Come on, everybody.

- [Juanita] Jim.

- [Jim] You better come along too.

I wanna talk to you.

- Mr. Wooley, the citizens of Wagon Gap

are deeply indebted to you.

You're a fine man and a good sheriff,

and you've been carrying
another man's burden.

Frame just confessed

that he was the man that killed Hawkins.

- Well, Chester, at
last, we're on our way.

- Mr. Wooley, I was kinda hoping

you might have reconsidered,
you know, about hitching up.

- California, here I come.

- In that case, Judge Benbow,

I accept your proposal of marriage.

- [Chester] Come on, Duke, let's go!

- Just a minute.

Judge, I have a confession to make.

In regards to the railroad--

- Well, how'd you know about the railroad?

Just got the offer this morning.

It's gonna make me the
richest woman in these parts.

- You chump.

If you'd married the widow,

we wouldn't have to work
the rest of our lives.

- You wouldn't, but she'd have
found something for me to do.

- You never do anything right.

- Oh, I don't, huh?
- No.

- Didn't I clean up all the bandits?

Didn't I make the town of Wagon Gap safe

for women and children?

In fact, so safe that nobody
even has to carry a gun?

Hm.

(gun fires)

(both yelping)

(people yelping)

Giddy up!

(lively orchestral music)