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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:25,208 --> 00:00:28,875 Thirty days ago, our world shattered. 2 00:00:28,958 --> 00:00:33,208 Our beloved father left us to the world of truth. 3 00:00:33,291 --> 00:00:35,416 The Gemara teaches in maseches shabbos 4 00:00:35,500 --> 00:00:38,458 that only 30 days after the passing, 5 00:00:38,541 --> 00:00:41,333 as long as flesh remains on the body, 6 00:00:41,416 --> 00:00:43,958 anything said to the niftar 7 00:00:44,750 --> 00:00:46,125 will be heard by him 8 00:00:46,958 --> 00:00:50,041 until his fate is sealed. 9 00:00:51,125 --> 00:00:55,000 So today, on the thirtieth day, 10 00:00:56,541 --> 00:00:58,208 we would like to tell you, Father, 11 00:01:00,208 --> 00:01:01,375 we're sorry. 12 00:01:02,875 --> 00:01:04,833 Sorry if we ever offended you. 13 00:01:06,125 --> 00:01:08,083 Sorry if we ever hurt you. 14 00:01:09,291 --> 00:01:12,958 Everything we did, we did in your honor. 15 00:01:26,750 --> 00:01:27,916 Okay. 16 00:01:29,000 --> 00:01:31,833 So, where were we? 17 00:01:33,291 --> 00:01:34,726 Who made the final call? 18 00:01:34,750 --> 00:01:36,750 Arye for the top of the gravestone, 19 00:01:36,833 --> 00:01:38,000 and Mom for the bottom. 20 00:01:38,083 --> 00:01:39,458 Ah, got it. 21 00:01:41,416 --> 00:01:43,791 "Loved and loving." 22 00:01:43,875 --> 00:01:45,500 Yeah. What's the problem with that? 23 00:01:45,583 --> 00:01:47,458 No, just... Nothing. 24 00:01:47,541 --> 00:01:50,041 Just that neither is true. 25 00:01:50,125 --> 00:01:52,708 What do you care if that's how she wants to remember it? 26 00:01:54,041 --> 00:01:56,125 Yeah. Who cares about the truth? 27 00:01:57,333 --> 00:01:58,958 I really appreciate the offer, Poli. 28 00:01:59,041 --> 00:02:00,601 - No. - I mean, I hope you know that. 29 00:02:00,625 --> 00:02:02,791 Of course you appreciate it. 30 00:02:02,875 --> 00:02:05,458 - It's a great offer. Yes. - You know me. 31 00:02:05,541 --> 00:02:07,541 Do you really think I'm gonna change my mind? 32 00:02:10,333 --> 00:02:12,208 How much do you make in your consulting work? 33 00:02:12,291 --> 00:02:13,833 - Poli! - Why? What's wrong? 34 00:02:13,916 --> 00:02:16,500 - That is none of your business. - Baby, telling you, 35 00:02:16,583 --> 00:02:17,958 - it's a terrible waste. - Stop it. 36 00:02:18,041 --> 00:02:20,041 You're the best product manager in America. 37 00:02:20,125 --> 00:02:21,708 - Mm-hmm. - And I'm offering you here 38 00:02:21,791 --> 00:02:23,208 an amazing start up. Not some... 39 00:02:23,291 --> 00:02:25,041 - I know. - Fucking corporate gig. 40 00:02:25,125 --> 00:02:26,291 It's a hell of a ride. 41 00:02:27,291 --> 00:02:29,166 That's what always turned you on. 42 00:02:31,416 --> 00:02:33,250 Doesn't turn me on anymore. 43 00:02:33,333 --> 00:02:34,666 Mm-hmm. 44 00:02:36,083 --> 00:02:37,541 I don't believe that. 45 00:02:37,625 --> 00:02:39,476 - A drive like that doesn't... - How are you guys doing here? 46 00:02:39,500 --> 00:02:41,142 - Mind if I clear some plates? - Yeah, thanks. 47 00:02:41,166 --> 00:02:43,226 And would you be interested in any dessert today? 48 00:02:43,250 --> 00:02:45,166 Yeah, sure. Why not? What do you... -No. 49 00:02:46,000 --> 00:02:47,125 Sorry. 50 00:02:47,208 --> 00:02:48,851 You know, why don't I give you guys 51 00:02:48,875 --> 00:02:50,791 - a minute, okay? - Okay. Yeah. 52 00:02:50,875 --> 00:02:53,375 - Sorry. Did you want something? - No, it's okay. 53 00:02:53,458 --> 00:02:55,541 - I just... - Do you mean you don't want anything? 54 00:02:55,625 --> 00:02:58,958 Well, it's just, uh, I have to leave 'cause, uh, 55 00:02:59,041 --> 00:03:00,916 Ava's got a dentist appointment soon. 56 00:03:01,000 --> 00:03:04,250 Ah, okay. Okay. No problem. Uh... 57 00:03:07,333 --> 00:03:10,166 So, how about tonight? 58 00:03:12,833 --> 00:03:15,375 Can't tonight. I have Ava. 59 00:03:15,458 --> 00:03:16,666 Jonathan's out of town. 60 00:03:16,750 --> 00:03:19,666 Okay. Well, can't you get a babysitter? 61 00:03:20,708 --> 00:03:22,375 I try not to do that on the nights 62 00:03:22,458 --> 00:03:23,916 that I have her with me. 63 00:03:26,375 --> 00:03:28,041 Got it. Okay. 64 00:03:28,125 --> 00:03:30,333 - Whenever you guys are ready. - Uh-huh. 65 00:03:41,291 --> 00:03:42,666 Will you stay for coffee? 66 00:03:45,541 --> 00:03:48,125 Uh, I have to get back. I can't. 67 00:03:49,125 --> 00:03:50,791 I'm sorry. 68 00:03:50,875 --> 00:03:52,583 Why don't you stay one more night 69 00:03:52,666 --> 00:03:54,250 and leave first thing tomorrow morning? 70 00:03:54,333 --> 00:03:55,583 Mom, I can't. 71 00:03:56,583 --> 00:03:58,125 Whoa, whoa, whoa, watch out, watch out. 72 00:03:58,208 --> 00:04:00,059 - Slow down, slow down. - Sorry, sorry, sorry. Okay. 73 00:04:00,083 --> 00:04:01,726 Okay. Slow down. 74 00:04:01,750 --> 00:04:03,309 Sorry, sorry, sorry. 75 00:04:03,333 --> 00:04:05,708 Okay. Just drive a little slower, okay? 76 00:04:08,958 --> 00:04:10,918 - I'm still not used to driving. - Yeah. 77 00:04:11,041 --> 00:04:12,916 Your father hardly ever let me. 78 00:04:14,166 --> 00:04:16,458 And I always really liked it. 79 00:04:19,375 --> 00:04:21,625 So, that's a silver lining, right? 80 00:04:21,708 --> 00:04:23,333 What? What do you mean? 81 00:04:23,416 --> 00:04:25,333 No, no, nothing. 82 00:04:25,916 --> 00:04:27,333 What nothing? 83 00:04:28,583 --> 00:04:32,166 I mean, it's just... I think it's okay to... 84 00:04:32,250 --> 00:04:36,458 I don't know. To recognize the positive aspects of... 85 00:04:38,375 --> 00:04:40,291 not living with him anymore, you know, 86 00:04:40,375 --> 00:04:42,375 not always worrying what Dad thinks. 87 00:04:42,458 --> 00:04:43,708 What? 88 00:04:43,791 --> 00:04:46,458 Do you think I'm supposed to be happy your father is dead? 89 00:04:46,541 --> 00:04:49,083 No, I didn't say that. Did I say that? 90 00:04:49,166 --> 00:04:50,916 No, I'm saying that I... 91 00:04:51,000 --> 00:04:53,541 Look, he wasn't the easiest guy to live with. 92 00:04:53,625 --> 00:04:56,083 Right? Let's say he was very free with his judgments. 93 00:04:56,166 --> 00:04:57,208 So what? 94 00:04:57,291 --> 00:04:59,708 He had high standards, especially for himself. 95 00:04:59,791 --> 00:05:00,871 Oh, Mom, come on. 96 00:05:00,916 --> 00:05:02,708 Most of the time you were just scared of him. 97 00:05:02,791 --> 00:05:04,125 - Scared? - Yeah, you were scared. 98 00:05:04,208 --> 00:05:05,684 You were scared that he was gonna accuse you 99 00:05:05,708 --> 00:05:07,948 - of some mortal... - Yonatan, where is this coming from? 100 00:05:08,625 --> 00:05:10,000 Why are you talking like this? 101 00:05:10,083 --> 00:05:11,809 What's wrong with talking? 102 00:05:11,833 --> 00:05:13,458 Maybe if you and Dad spoke more, then... 103 00:05:13,541 --> 00:05:14,666 We spoke a lot. 104 00:05:14,750 --> 00:05:16,630 We had five children, we had a household to run. 105 00:05:16,708 --> 00:05:18,726 - All right. - What, you think we didn't speak? 106 00:05:18,750 --> 00:05:19,976 - Okay. - So cut it out. 107 00:05:20,000 --> 00:05:22,583 I'm just saying that you spent many, many years 108 00:05:22,666 --> 00:05:24,833 living with someone you didn't love, okay? 109 00:05:24,916 --> 00:05:26,356 Not to mention, you know, attraction. 110 00:05:26,416 --> 00:05:27,333 What? 111 00:05:27,416 --> 00:05:28,767 I just don't want you to feel guilty 112 00:05:28,791 --> 00:05:30,375 about feeling the tiniest bit relieved. 113 00:05:30,458 --> 00:05:32,000 Well, I'm not relieved. 114 00:05:32,083 --> 00:05:34,601 - Okay. - Would you like to force me to feel relieved? 115 00:05:34,625 --> 00:05:36,958 - Okay. - I loved your father. 116 00:05:38,666 --> 00:05:40,666 Yes, yes. 117 00:05:40,750 --> 00:05:42,541 Maybe not by your standards. 118 00:05:42,625 --> 00:05:44,666 All right. Well, I'm not interested 119 00:05:44,750 --> 00:05:46,041 in having a fight with you, okay? 120 00:05:46,125 --> 00:05:47,125 Mmm. 121 00:05:47,166 --> 00:05:49,125 - I'm just saying... - I'm not. 122 00:05:49,208 --> 00:05:53,875 Before you disrespect what I had with your father, 123 00:05:53,958 --> 00:05:55,625 - think hard... - Mm-hmm? 124 00:05:55,708 --> 00:05:57,541 About whether you did everything you could 125 00:05:57,625 --> 00:06:01,000 to stay together, you know, to get sholom bayis. 126 00:06:01,083 --> 00:06:03,833 All right. Stay together for the kids. 127 00:06:03,916 --> 00:06:05,392 - And even if so... - The kids. 128 00:06:05,416 --> 00:06:07,333 What's so wrong about that? 129 00:06:07,416 --> 00:06:10,458 What? Is that anything to look down on? 130 00:06:10,541 --> 00:06:12,041 You don't think that's important? 131 00:06:12,125 --> 00:06:14,583 A kid will always want his parents to stay together 132 00:06:14,666 --> 00:06:16,142 - even if it's not... - Uh, first of all, 133 00:06:16,166 --> 00:06:18,059 - definitely not always. - All those people 134 00:06:18,083 --> 00:06:19,625 who say, "Oh, if I'm happy, 135 00:06:19,708 --> 00:06:21,625 then my kid will be happy too," 136 00:06:21,708 --> 00:06:24,125 that is nonsense. 137 00:06:24,208 --> 00:06:27,125 Get a divorce, fine. But don't lie to yourself. 138 00:06:32,041 --> 00:06:35,416 I really... I'm just savoring every moment with her, you know. 139 00:06:35,500 --> 00:06:37,458 The years go so fast, and now we have 140 00:06:37,541 --> 00:06:39,583 these amazing nights together. There's... 141 00:06:39,666 --> 00:06:42,208 - We watch movies, and... - Are you seeing someone? 142 00:06:42,875 --> 00:06:45,166 What? No. 143 00:06:45,250 --> 00:06:47,666 Yeah, I think you are. 144 00:06:47,750 --> 00:06:49,875 Well, I'm not, so. 145 00:06:49,958 --> 00:06:52,458 And I have a feeling I know who it is, too. 146 00:06:54,166 --> 00:06:55,500 I'm not seeing anybody, 147 00:06:55,583 --> 00:06:57,625 and I'm not planning on it anytime soon. 148 00:06:59,083 --> 00:07:00,166 Is it Ackerman? 149 00:07:00,958 --> 00:07:03,291 What? No, of course not. 150 00:07:03,375 --> 00:07:05,541 I think it is. And honestly, 151 00:07:05,625 --> 00:07:07,434 I always knew it was going to happen at some point. 152 00:07:07,458 --> 00:07:09,250 All right. Well, it's not Ackerman. It's... 153 00:07:09,333 --> 00:07:11,458 I mean, it's not anyone, actually, so. 154 00:07:11,541 --> 00:07:14,250 Okay. Whatever. Fair enough. 155 00:07:15,041 --> 00:07:16,125 This is me. 156 00:07:18,250 --> 00:07:20,625 Okay. Well, uh... 157 00:07:21,291 --> 00:07:22,541 Good luck with him. 158 00:07:23,208 --> 00:07:26,375 I give it a year max. 159 00:07:26,458 --> 00:07:28,375 - Okay, I'll... - Then you leave him too. 160 00:07:28,458 --> 00:07:29,708 Okay. 161 00:07:30,958 --> 00:07:34,000 You know, sometimes I just... 162 00:07:34,083 --> 00:07:36,583 I just wish I hadn't met you at all. 163 00:07:36,666 --> 00:07:39,458 - I didn't spend all these years on... - Poli, stop. 164 00:07:39,541 --> 00:07:41,708 Someone who doesn't understand what it means 165 00:07:41,791 --> 00:07:42,833 to be in a relationship. 166 00:07:42,916 --> 00:07:44,559 You're saying things that you don't mean. Stop. 167 00:07:44,583 --> 00:07:47,500 And what living together actually means. Family. 168 00:07:51,333 --> 00:07:55,125 Okay, well... I'm running late. 169 00:08:01,583 --> 00:08:02,916 Bye, Poli. 170 00:09:05,791 --> 00:09:07,625 - Hello? - Hey, Mom. 171 00:09:07,708 --> 00:09:09,791 - Hey, honey. How you doing? - Good. 172 00:09:09,875 --> 00:09:14,291 Josie's mom wanted me to check if I can watch a PG-13 movie. 173 00:09:14,375 --> 00:09:16,583 Well, I'm doing great. Thanks for asking. 174 00:09:16,666 --> 00:09:18,000 Mom. 175 00:09:18,083 --> 00:09:19,416 Yeah, of course you can. 176 00:09:19,500 --> 00:09:23,333 That's what I told her, but she wanted me to ask. Mom? 177 00:09:23,416 --> 00:09:26,166 Um, tell her thank you for checking and, you know, 178 00:09:26,250 --> 00:09:27,650 if you could also remind her that... 179 00:09:27,708 --> 00:09:30,250 We're about to have dinner, so I can't really talk. 180 00:09:30,333 --> 00:09:33,791 Okay... Yeah, but hon... Okay, just remember, you know, 181 00:09:33,875 --> 00:09:35,333 I have a meeting that's really late, 182 00:09:35,416 --> 00:09:36,833 so, um, if you need anything, 183 00:09:36,916 --> 00:09:39,916 - just have her text me and... - I know. You told me. 184 00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:42,000 - Oh, Mom? - Yes, honey? 185 00:09:42,083 --> 00:09:45,041 Can I go to sleep at 9:30, please? 186 00:09:45,125 --> 00:09:47,083 - Okay. - 'Cause Josie's bedtime is 9:30. 187 00:09:47,166 --> 00:09:49,666 Um, Josie's a little older than you. 188 00:09:49,750 --> 00:09:50,833 Mom. 189 00:09:50,916 --> 00:09:52,958 But, um... 190 00:09:53,833 --> 00:09:56,000 uh, yeah, sure, you can. 191 00:09:56,083 --> 00:09:58,250 - Thank you. - You're welcome. 192 00:09:58,333 --> 00:09:59,973 Please try to get some sleep though, okay? 193 00:10:00,041 --> 00:10:01,208 Okay, love you, bye. 194 00:10:01,291 --> 00:10:03,791 Okay, love you... 195 00:10:04,708 --> 00:10:06,458 - Hey. - Hey. 196 00:10:10,666 --> 00:10:12,041 Is she with Veronica? 197 00:10:12,125 --> 00:10:13,458 No, she's with Josie. It's... 198 00:10:13,541 --> 00:10:14,767 - Oh, right, right, right. - Yeah, yeah. 199 00:10:14,791 --> 00:10:16,267 - She's over the moon, though. - Yeah. 200 00:10:16,291 --> 00:10:19,791 - Sleepover on a school night. - Oh, wow. Yeah, I bet. I mean... 201 00:10:19,875 --> 00:10:21,458 How's your mom? 202 00:10:21,541 --> 00:10:23,000 Uh, she's good, she's good. 203 00:10:23,083 --> 00:10:25,791 Yeah, it ended up being a little harder than I expected 204 00:10:25,875 --> 00:10:27,355 - to leave, so... - That's okay. 205 00:10:27,416 --> 00:10:28,851 I mean, you could have stayed. It's... 206 00:10:28,875 --> 00:10:30,708 - No, no, no, don't... - I texted you that... 207 00:10:30,791 --> 00:10:32,375 No way, no way. 208 00:10:36,458 --> 00:10:38,708 - Shall we get going? - Yes, let's do it. 209 00:10:50,875 --> 00:10:53,041 You know, when, um, I was leaving, 210 00:10:53,125 --> 00:10:55,541 Arye said, "Happy Purim." 211 00:10:55,625 --> 00:10:57,541 - Is today Purim? - Sunday. 212 00:10:57,875 --> 00:10:58,958 Oh. 213 00:10:59,041 --> 00:11:01,333 So you know... You know what that means? 214 00:11:02,583 --> 00:11:03,750 Mm-mmm. 215 00:11:03,833 --> 00:11:05,375 Our anniversary. 216 00:11:05,458 --> 00:11:06,916 What? What are you talking about? 217 00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:09,458 Our anniversary was, uh, September 2nd. 218 00:11:09,541 --> 00:11:12,583 Not... not of our wedding. 219 00:11:12,666 --> 00:11:14,625 Of the first time we... 220 00:11:18,166 --> 00:11:19,291 you know. 221 00:11:19,375 --> 00:11:20,875 - After the emergency room. - Right. 222 00:11:20,958 --> 00:11:22,041 After my asthma attack. 223 00:11:22,125 --> 00:11:23,625 How do you even remember that date? 224 00:11:23,708 --> 00:11:25,375 - Because it was Purim. - Okay. 225 00:11:25,458 --> 00:11:27,000 And I was over at Hoffman's. 226 00:11:27,083 --> 00:11:28,583 We were drinking ourselves to death. 227 00:11:28,666 --> 00:11:30,958 And that's... that's how the whole thing started. 228 00:11:32,916 --> 00:11:34,833 I thought maybe... 229 00:11:34,916 --> 00:11:36,756 You know what? Would you make a left turn here? 230 00:11:36,791 --> 00:11:37,851 No, it's actually further down. 231 00:11:37,875 --> 00:11:40,750 No, I know, but just make a left here. 232 00:11:40,833 --> 00:11:44,250 Is the place... is the surprise you were talking to me about? 233 00:11:45,125 --> 00:11:46,875 Left. 234 00:11:46,958 --> 00:11:49,666 - Okay, mister. - Right here. 235 00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:55,458 Actually, you know what? 236 00:11:55,541 --> 00:11:57,416 Pull over right here. 237 00:11:57,500 --> 00:11:59,875 You're not gonna kidnap and murder me, are you? 238 00:11:59,958 --> 00:12:01,500 Just pull over. 239 00:12:12,833 --> 00:12:14,458 Can I open my eyes now? 240 00:12:16,041 --> 00:12:17,291 Not yet. 241 00:12:23,666 --> 00:12:24,875 Well? 242 00:12:31,708 --> 00:12:33,250 Almost there. 243 00:12:43,083 --> 00:12:44,250 Open your eyes. 244 00:12:53,708 --> 00:12:55,166 Surprise. 245 00:13:02,166 --> 00:13:03,833 Yeah, so... 246 00:13:03,916 --> 00:13:05,750 I kind of became obsessed with the house. 247 00:13:05,833 --> 00:13:06,833 Okay. 248 00:13:06,875 --> 00:13:08,958 And I've been driving by it on my way to work 249 00:13:09,041 --> 00:13:12,333 and on my way back just to see it. 250 00:13:12,416 --> 00:13:14,000 I know it's... 251 00:13:14,083 --> 00:13:16,791 I know. It's very sentimental of me. 252 00:13:16,875 --> 00:13:19,000 - It's very nice. - Yeah. 253 00:13:19,083 --> 00:13:22,541 So, um, anyway, uh, when my parents visited, 254 00:13:22,625 --> 00:13:27,041 uh, last Hanukkah, I went on Airbnb to find a place 255 00:13:27,125 --> 00:13:31,458 for them to stay and suddenly, our house popped up. 256 00:13:32,791 --> 00:13:33,791 Huh. 257 00:13:33,875 --> 00:13:36,875 Yeah, I guess they rent it out 258 00:13:36,958 --> 00:13:39,583 when they go on vacation or whatever. 259 00:13:39,666 --> 00:13:44,875 So, um... so I signed up for, uh, alerts. 260 00:13:46,750 --> 00:13:48,583 So, are they on vacation now? 261 00:13:48,666 --> 00:13:50,333 I guess so. Yeah. 262 00:13:55,500 --> 00:13:56,958 So what do you say? 263 00:13:59,708 --> 00:14:01,041 - Yeah. - Yeah? 264 00:14:01,125 --> 00:14:02,125 Mm-hmm. 265 00:14:02,458 --> 00:14:03,458 Okay. 266 00:14:22,708 --> 00:14:23,833 So... 267 00:14:26,375 --> 00:14:29,041 - there's a lockbox... - Okay. 268 00:14:29,125 --> 00:14:31,791 Somewhere. Ah, here it is. 269 00:14:35,625 --> 00:14:37,583 Four, oh, five... 270 00:14:49,500 --> 00:14:50,500 Okay. 271 00:15:07,250 --> 00:15:08,416 Thank you. 272 00:16:26,875 --> 00:16:29,125 - Boys. - Crazy, huh? 273 00:16:31,583 --> 00:16:33,208 What do you think, like... 274 00:16:34,250 --> 00:16:37,500 seven and ten? 275 00:16:37,583 --> 00:16:40,000 Yeah, something like that. Yeah. 276 00:16:40,708 --> 00:16:42,125 What's that smell? 277 00:16:45,166 --> 00:16:46,541 Dead body? 278 00:16:46,625 --> 00:16:47,875 Oh. 279 00:16:47,958 --> 00:16:49,083 What is it? 280 00:16:49,166 --> 00:16:50,375 Hockey stink. 281 00:16:51,666 --> 00:16:53,708 It's worse. 282 00:17:00,000 --> 00:17:01,291 Sweet. 283 00:17:07,791 --> 00:17:10,000 I guess this one they couldn't really improve. 284 00:17:11,958 --> 00:17:13,791 They kept the light fixtures. 285 00:17:14,125 --> 00:17:15,291 Yeah. 286 00:17:22,583 --> 00:17:24,833 No smoking, no pets, 287 00:17:25,791 --> 00:17:30,000 - no parties or events. - Mm. 288 00:17:38,041 --> 00:17:39,083 Huh. 289 00:17:40,875 --> 00:17:42,833 Is that included in the rental? 290 00:17:46,000 --> 00:17:47,958 I'll get them a new one. 291 00:17:49,375 --> 00:17:51,125 You're such a rebel. 292 00:17:52,500 --> 00:17:53,625 That's me. 293 00:18:00,666 --> 00:18:01,791 Thanks. 294 00:18:03,625 --> 00:18:05,791 Happy anniversary. 295 00:18:06,625 --> 00:18:08,166 Happy anniversary. 296 00:18:14,291 --> 00:18:16,500 Seventeen years. 297 00:18:17,250 --> 00:18:18,791 Can you believe it? 298 00:18:20,208 --> 00:18:21,208 Yeah. 299 00:18:27,500 --> 00:18:30,625 Well, my parents celebrated their 53rd-year anniversary 300 00:18:30,708 --> 00:18:31,708 this year. 301 00:18:32,666 --> 00:18:34,333 That's... That's crazy. 302 00:18:40,916 --> 00:18:41,916 What? 303 00:18:46,375 --> 00:18:48,750 Just, I got in a fight with my mom. 304 00:18:48,833 --> 00:18:50,750 But I kinda picked the fight with her. 305 00:18:50,833 --> 00:18:54,000 For some reason I was trying to get her to admit 306 00:18:54,083 --> 00:18:55,916 that her marriage had been terrible. 307 00:18:56,958 --> 00:18:58,416 You... 308 00:18:58,500 --> 00:19:00,833 It's amazing how you always become like a little boy 309 00:19:00,916 --> 00:19:03,000 - around your mom. - I know. I don't know why. 310 00:19:03,083 --> 00:19:05,125 - Why? - I don't know why. 311 00:19:05,208 --> 00:19:07,750 - Don't know why I did that. - Mm-hmm. 312 00:19:10,333 --> 00:19:14,166 At least we talked, you know. Like really talked. 313 00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:16,000 Yeah. 314 00:19:18,750 --> 00:19:21,541 Well, I'm sure she must be so proud of you right now. 315 00:19:21,625 --> 00:19:23,458 Yeah, in her own way. 316 00:19:25,583 --> 00:19:28,416 Elisheva told me that she watched my TED Talk 317 00:19:28,500 --> 00:19:29,916 - like six times. - Really? 318 00:19:30,000 --> 00:19:31,875 But she'd never tell me that, though. 319 00:19:31,958 --> 00:19:33,541 And I can't tell her I know. 320 00:19:33,625 --> 00:19:35,250 You know how that whole dance goes. 321 00:19:37,750 --> 00:19:38,916 Yeah, I know. 322 00:19:40,666 --> 00:19:41,666 Yeah. 323 00:19:42,375 --> 00:19:44,083 She says hi, by the way. 324 00:19:45,833 --> 00:19:47,458 - Come on. - It's true. 325 00:19:52,250 --> 00:19:53,250 What? 326 00:19:55,083 --> 00:19:57,708 You think she suspects something about the two of us? 327 00:19:58,375 --> 00:20:00,333 - About us? - Yeah. 328 00:20:00,416 --> 00:20:02,166 - Seriously? - Yeah. 329 00:20:02,250 --> 00:20:04,833 No way. No, no, no, seriously, no way. 330 00:20:04,916 --> 00:20:06,416 How can you be so sure? 331 00:20:07,125 --> 00:20:08,541 - Because... - Mmm. 332 00:20:08,625 --> 00:20:12,125 Nothing could seem more far-fetched than this. 333 00:20:12,208 --> 00:20:16,250 It's completely outside her spectrum of possibilities. 334 00:20:16,333 --> 00:20:17,958 Mm-hmm. 335 00:20:18,041 --> 00:20:23,791 And, uh, so when she saw us go up to your old room together 336 00:20:23,875 --> 00:20:27,750 when I visited a month ago after your father died... 337 00:20:27,833 --> 00:20:29,625 - Mm-hmm. - That... 338 00:20:29,708 --> 00:20:31,541 What? No, it's totally acceptable 339 00:20:31,625 --> 00:20:34,666 for children to have guests in their old room during Shiva. 340 00:20:35,041 --> 00:20:36,041 Right. 341 00:20:36,125 --> 00:20:39,250 And, um, when she knocked on the door 342 00:20:40,083 --> 00:20:41,708 and you didn't answer it? 343 00:20:43,541 --> 00:20:47,791 She thought I was sleeping. I asked her afterwards. I did. 344 00:20:47,875 --> 00:20:50,083 - I'm not convinced. - I'm telling you, 345 00:20:50,166 --> 00:20:54,125 if I could never imagine this happening, 346 00:20:54,208 --> 00:20:55,625 there's no way she could. 347 00:20:58,750 --> 00:21:00,291 What did you imagine? 348 00:21:02,833 --> 00:21:04,375 When you came to Shiva? 349 00:21:09,458 --> 00:21:11,178 Honestly, I was just trying to hide the fact 350 00:21:11,250 --> 00:21:13,750 that I had a massive boner in front of everybody. 351 00:21:14,583 --> 00:21:16,750 I know. 352 00:21:16,833 --> 00:21:18,458 I felt it when you hugged me. 353 00:21:18,541 --> 00:21:21,291 - I wanted you to feel it. - Oh, my God. 354 00:21:25,875 --> 00:21:30,458 And then, when you asked me to go upstairs with you, 355 00:21:30,541 --> 00:21:34,083 I felt that all the eyes in the house were watching us 356 00:21:34,166 --> 00:21:36,666 and they knew exactly what was about to happen. 357 00:21:36,750 --> 00:21:39,458 Mmm. What did that do to you? 358 00:21:40,875 --> 00:21:42,541 It made me wet. 359 00:21:51,291 --> 00:21:52,791 It' was so crazy. 360 00:21:55,416 --> 00:22:00,208 In the middle of all that family shit and grief. 361 00:22:03,041 --> 00:22:05,708 And after all that time, you coming in there like that, 362 00:22:05,791 --> 00:22:08,625 like... like an apparition. 363 00:22:11,416 --> 00:22:13,500 Well, I know. I saw it on your face. 364 00:22:29,875 --> 00:22:32,583 They're really, like, making me angry, you know? 365 00:22:32,666 --> 00:22:34,000 Yeah, I get that. 366 00:22:35,333 --> 00:22:36,750 - It's not ugly. - No. 367 00:22:36,833 --> 00:22:38,250 They did a nice job, but like... 368 00:22:39,625 --> 00:22:42,083 how dare they, you know? 369 00:22:42,166 --> 00:22:43,208 Uh-huh. 370 00:22:45,791 --> 00:22:47,916 Still, it's better than a hotel room, right? 371 00:22:49,083 --> 00:22:52,166 I don't know. I kind of like a hotel room. 372 00:22:53,125 --> 00:22:54,458 - Really? - Yeah. 373 00:22:55,791 --> 00:22:56,875 Something about it's like, 374 00:22:57,000 --> 00:22:59,458 it is what it is and it's not what it's not. 375 00:23:03,333 --> 00:23:04,500 Yeah, maybe. 376 00:23:13,833 --> 00:23:18,500 So... anything going on? 377 00:23:19,791 --> 00:23:21,125 What's happening? 378 00:23:21,208 --> 00:23:22,416 What could be happening? 379 00:23:23,208 --> 00:23:24,833 Are you seeing anyone? 380 00:23:26,750 --> 00:23:29,000 - Since last week? - Yeah. 381 00:23:29,083 --> 00:23:32,083 Any promising dates? Anything you wanna... 382 00:23:32,166 --> 00:23:33,500 - No. - Take further? 383 00:23:33,583 --> 00:23:35,791 I told you I don't want anything serious right now. 384 00:23:38,208 --> 00:23:40,166 - Why not? - Okay. I have to say, 385 00:23:40,250 --> 00:23:41,976 you're getting a little obsessed with the subject 386 00:23:42,000 --> 00:23:45,083 and I'm, uh, asking myself what that is about. 387 00:23:45,166 --> 00:23:47,416 No, nothing. I'm just... I'm trying to grasp 388 00:23:47,500 --> 00:23:50,000 - the concept here. - But what concept? 389 00:23:50,083 --> 00:23:54,000 Being alone. This whole "I'm better off alone" thing. 390 00:23:54,083 --> 00:23:56,541 It's not a concept. I'm just happy this way. 391 00:23:58,875 --> 00:24:01,958 Okay. Not totally buying it. 392 00:24:04,000 --> 00:24:06,583 Right, you used to always panic whenever I would talk 393 00:24:06,666 --> 00:24:08,250 about being alone. 394 00:24:08,333 --> 00:24:12,041 Yeah. You saw it as a sign that, um, I was in a bad way, 395 00:24:12,125 --> 00:24:14,791 but reality is, I just... 396 00:24:14,875 --> 00:24:17,791 It was something that I felt like I was missing. 397 00:24:17,875 --> 00:24:21,416 You know, I'd never really even expected 398 00:24:21,500 --> 00:24:23,041 that I'd ever get married. 399 00:24:23,125 --> 00:24:24,791 Yeah, I remember. 400 00:24:26,625 --> 00:24:28,041 Even with you. 401 00:24:28,375 --> 00:24:29,500 I know. 402 00:24:30,583 --> 00:24:32,708 That night when you proposed and... 403 00:24:32,791 --> 00:24:35,041 - Mm-hmm. Talked. - All night... 404 00:24:35,125 --> 00:24:36,458 - That's right. - About it. 405 00:24:37,916 --> 00:24:41,416 Then the next morning, I went to go see my mom. 406 00:24:41,500 --> 00:24:45,625 I don't actually... I don't know if I told you much about this. 407 00:24:45,708 --> 00:24:47,333 - I don't think so. - Um... 408 00:24:48,250 --> 00:24:50,208 it was in, uh, Back Bay. 409 00:24:50,291 --> 00:24:52,500 She was living nearby with Julian. 410 00:24:52,583 --> 00:24:54,916 - Mm-hmm. - Her third husband. 411 00:24:55,000 --> 00:24:56,375 I'm not sure if you even met him. 412 00:24:56,458 --> 00:24:58,250 Yeah, I think I did. I think I did once. 413 00:24:58,333 --> 00:24:59,958 Okay. Well, they split up soon after. 414 00:25:00,041 --> 00:25:02,333 Anyway, she, um, she was like... 415 00:25:04,041 --> 00:25:05,250 "Don't do it." 416 00:25:05,833 --> 00:25:07,166 Don't do what? 417 00:25:07,250 --> 00:25:08,416 Don't get married. 418 00:25:09,166 --> 00:25:10,875 - She said that? - Yeah. 419 00:25:10,958 --> 00:25:13,250 "Jonathan's a good guy. 420 00:25:13,333 --> 00:25:14,916 Best guy you've ever been with." 421 00:25:15,000 --> 00:25:16,541 - Obviously. - Mm-hmm. 422 00:25:16,625 --> 00:25:18,916 "Probably the best guy you'll ever be with." 423 00:25:19,000 --> 00:25:21,125 Wow, Mom, okay. 424 00:25:21,208 --> 00:25:23,333 "But you know you're not cut out for getting married. 425 00:25:23,416 --> 00:25:25,583 You don't have that gene." 426 00:25:25,666 --> 00:25:27,708 She said, "I don't have it, your father certainly 427 00:25:27,791 --> 00:25:29,471 doesn't have it, so why would you have it?" 428 00:25:34,500 --> 00:25:36,333 I mean, this is... This is the woman 429 00:25:36,416 --> 00:25:38,458 - that dragged you along on her trysts... - Yeah. 430 00:25:38,541 --> 00:25:40,267 When you were five years old, so I don't think 431 00:25:40,291 --> 00:25:42,208 really the person to listen to, right? 432 00:25:43,416 --> 00:25:45,250 Well, obviously, I didn't. 433 00:25:47,500 --> 00:25:51,958 No, I was gonna prove her wrong, gonna prove it to myself. 434 00:25:52,041 --> 00:25:54,625 So I, you know, spent my life 435 00:25:54,708 --> 00:25:56,541 trying to prove that I was different. 436 00:25:57,833 --> 00:25:59,375 And that I was gonna make it last. 437 00:26:07,041 --> 00:26:08,416 It didn't last. 438 00:26:13,250 --> 00:26:14,791 So maybe she was right. 439 00:26:15,375 --> 00:26:16,500 She's right? 440 00:26:16,583 --> 00:26:19,000 Yeah. Right about the gene? 441 00:26:19,083 --> 00:26:21,041 The monogamy gene? 442 00:26:21,125 --> 00:26:22,833 No, it's just maybe... 443 00:26:25,041 --> 00:26:26,791 maybe it's not right for me. 444 00:26:28,625 --> 00:26:31,000 So what, does it mean that you're doomed? 445 00:26:31,291 --> 00:26:32,333 No. 446 00:26:33,625 --> 00:26:35,625 Jonathan, I'm not doomed. 447 00:26:38,583 --> 00:26:40,791 I wonder if it's hard for you to understand because... 448 00:26:42,875 --> 00:26:45,041 you really can't be alone. 449 00:26:45,125 --> 00:26:47,375 I mean, you never could. 450 00:26:47,458 --> 00:26:49,958 You always needed like, I don't know, a... 451 00:26:52,000 --> 00:26:54,208 witness to your life. 452 00:26:58,250 --> 00:27:00,250 - Witness? - Yeah. 453 00:27:00,333 --> 00:27:02,083 - Okay. - Yeah. Someone who's constantly, 454 00:27:02,166 --> 00:27:04,458 you know, seeing you, and... 455 00:27:04,541 --> 00:27:07,208 I mean, like, keeping a record. 456 00:27:07,666 --> 00:27:10,416 Hmm. Okay. 457 00:27:12,583 --> 00:27:14,708 No, did I hurt your feelings? 458 00:27:14,791 --> 00:27:16,708 No, no, no. No, no, I didn't... 459 00:27:16,791 --> 00:27:18,916 I didn't realize I was such a burden. 460 00:27:19,000 --> 00:27:20,750 You're not. You weren't. 461 00:27:22,125 --> 00:27:24,541 - It's not personal, you know. - Okay. 462 00:27:25,958 --> 00:27:29,250 I really think most women feel this way about men. 463 00:27:29,333 --> 00:27:30,333 Hmm. 464 00:27:31,625 --> 00:27:32,625 Yeah. 465 00:27:36,125 --> 00:27:41,166 I mean, I haven't been single since I was 15 years old, 466 00:27:41,250 --> 00:27:42,916 - you know what I mean? - Mm-hmm. 467 00:27:43,958 --> 00:27:45,250 I realized... 468 00:27:47,750 --> 00:27:49,375 it's kind of refreshing. 469 00:28:15,958 --> 00:28:17,166 You okay? 470 00:28:20,291 --> 00:28:22,625 - Something's off. - Yeah. 471 00:28:23,958 --> 00:28:25,375 - It's just so weird. - Yeah. 472 00:28:25,458 --> 00:28:29,333 It's so weird to be here again. 473 00:28:36,666 --> 00:28:37,875 You okay? 474 00:28:37,958 --> 00:28:39,625 Yeah. It's nothing serious. 475 00:28:45,083 --> 00:28:48,083 Maybe it was a bad idea to come here? 476 00:28:48,166 --> 00:28:50,958 No, I really am happy you brought me here. 477 00:28:51,041 --> 00:28:54,375 Yeah? - No, it was a really nice thought. 478 00:28:54,458 --> 00:28:56,250 Yeah, maybe it's just the day. 479 00:28:57,000 --> 00:28:59,041 - Uh-huh. - It's just so much. 480 00:29:00,958 --> 00:29:02,916 Yeah. 481 00:29:03,000 --> 00:29:06,166 Yeah, maybe we should have, uh, yeah, postponed it, so. 482 00:29:09,500 --> 00:29:12,500 - Let me get my, uh... - Sure. 483 00:29:12,583 --> 00:29:13,875 Be right back. 484 00:31:31,500 --> 00:31:33,291 Fuck. 485 00:31:41,750 --> 00:31:43,708 Hey, Jane. 486 00:31:43,791 --> 00:31:46,500 - Jonathan. - Hi, baby. 487 00:31:46,583 --> 00:31:49,750 Oh. You only speak to me when you're, like, really tired. 488 00:31:49,833 --> 00:31:53,125 No, yeah, I'm still up. I'm still up. 489 00:31:53,208 --> 00:31:55,750 I'm just talking quietly 'cause Mom fell asleep already. 490 00:31:55,833 --> 00:31:57,166 Oh. 491 00:31:57,250 --> 00:31:59,250 - Yeah. - So sorry. Is she okay? 492 00:31:59,333 --> 00:32:01,416 Yeah, yeah, yeah, she's fine. It's just... 493 00:32:01,500 --> 00:32:04,458 you know, the whole thing at the ceremony 494 00:32:04,541 --> 00:32:06,500 was really draining for her. 495 00:32:06,583 --> 00:32:08,208 Oh, God. Are you okay? 496 00:32:08,291 --> 00:32:09,750 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 497 00:32:09,833 --> 00:32:11,875 Yeah. Well, you know how it is. It's like the... 498 00:32:11,958 --> 00:32:15,458 being at the cemetery, and then going to an empty house, 499 00:32:15,541 --> 00:32:17,000 it was a lot for her. 500 00:32:21,416 --> 00:32:26,208 Uh, yes, taking the 6:30 train out of Valley Stream 501 00:32:26,291 --> 00:32:28,791 than the Amtrak from Penn Station. 502 00:32:29,583 --> 00:32:31,000 Okay. 503 00:32:31,083 --> 00:32:33,083 - Yep. - So, um... 504 00:32:35,708 --> 00:32:36,958 Is he up? 505 00:32:37,041 --> 00:32:38,666 Okay, he's right there with you? 506 00:32:38,750 --> 00:32:41,041 Yeah, he wants to say hi. 507 00:32:41,125 --> 00:32:42,750 Okay. Yeah. Just, uh... 508 00:32:44,666 --> 00:32:46,916 Trying to connect here. 509 00:32:49,375 --> 00:32:50,541 Okay. 510 00:32:51,708 --> 00:32:52,791 Okay. 511 00:32:53,833 --> 00:32:55,875 Oh, hello. 512 00:32:55,958 --> 00:32:57,916 - Hi. - Hi. 513 00:32:58,000 --> 00:33:01,708 - Say Hi. - Hey, Ethan. 514 00:33:01,791 --> 00:33:05,000 Oh, Bubba, why are you awake? 515 00:33:05,083 --> 00:33:07,625 He was growing some teeth. Encouraging. 516 00:33:08,416 --> 00:33:10,375 What's up now, where are you? 517 00:33:10,458 --> 00:33:12,125 Uh, I'm in the bathroom. 518 00:33:13,583 --> 00:33:15,750 - What? - I'm in the bathroom. 519 00:33:16,125 --> 00:33:17,166 Okay. 520 00:33:17,250 --> 00:33:20,083 Look, Ethan, can you show Daddy your new trick? 521 00:33:20,166 --> 00:33:21,625 Can you... What does a dog say? 522 00:33:21,708 --> 00:33:22,708 Woof. 523 00:33:22,791 --> 00:33:24,083 - Woof. - Woof. Woof? 524 00:33:24,166 --> 00:33:25,750 - Yeah. - Oh, my gosh. 525 00:33:25,833 --> 00:33:27,250 He just did that today? 526 00:33:29,458 --> 00:33:31,958 He's just, like, wants to party? 527 00:33:32,041 --> 00:33:36,375 He's like sleeping and eating because... 528 00:33:36,458 --> 00:33:38,500 I mean, he's living the life. Um... 529 00:33:38,583 --> 00:33:41,333 Oh, man. 530 00:33:42,166 --> 00:33:43,958 It's tough, huh? Sorry. 531 00:33:45,125 --> 00:33:46,208 I love you. 532 00:33:46,291 --> 00:33:48,250 - Okay. I love you too. - Bye. 533 00:33:48,333 --> 00:33:50,625 - Lila tov, bubbelah. - Lila tov. 534 00:33:50,708 --> 00:33:52,375 Say "lila tov," bye. 535 00:33:52,458 --> 00:33:53,708 Okay, baby. 536 00:33:53,791 --> 00:33:55,666 - Okay, I'm gonna try to... - Lila tov. 537 00:33:56,500 --> 00:33:57,708 - Bye, coocoo. - Bye. 538 00:33:57,791 --> 00:33:59,458 Bye. Bye, cooties. 539 00:33:59,541 --> 00:34:02,250 - Bye. Love to your mom, okay? - Okay. Thanks, sweetie. 540 00:34:02,333 --> 00:34:03,500 Okay. 541 00:34:29,041 --> 00:34:31,000 Oh, my God. 542 00:34:32,208 --> 00:34:35,125 - Wow! - I know, right? 543 00:34:35,833 --> 00:34:37,875 Oh, my God. 544 00:34:37,958 --> 00:34:40,166 Can you imagine this as Ava's room? 545 00:34:40,250 --> 00:34:42,625 No way, we would have taken it for ourselves. 546 00:34:43,500 --> 00:34:45,041 Look at this. 547 00:34:45,125 --> 00:34:47,000 Is this what you imagined back then? 548 00:34:47,083 --> 00:34:50,458 Well, yeah, not this big, but... yeah, something like that. 549 00:34:52,000 --> 00:34:53,916 So this is what I missed out on, huh? 550 00:34:54,000 --> 00:34:55,625 Well, you could have done it yourself. 551 00:34:56,083 --> 00:34:58,708 Yes. True. 552 00:35:08,958 --> 00:35:10,208 Cute. 553 00:35:11,416 --> 00:35:12,791 Genius kid. 554 00:35:28,333 --> 00:35:31,250 It is a little over the top, but I have to say 555 00:35:31,333 --> 00:35:33,625 the effect is undeniable. 556 00:35:53,416 --> 00:35:54,541 You okay? 557 00:35:54,916 --> 00:35:55,833 Yeah. 558 00:35:55,916 --> 00:35:57,875 Yeah, sorry, it wasn't very serious. 559 00:35:57,958 --> 00:36:00,083 Sorry, I disappeared on you. 560 00:36:02,166 --> 00:36:04,291 Hmm, you got dressed. 561 00:36:06,583 --> 00:36:08,166 You wanted to leave. 562 00:36:11,500 --> 00:36:13,833 Yeah, just for a second, but it passed. 563 00:36:19,250 --> 00:36:21,083 Who was that on the phone? 564 00:36:22,750 --> 00:36:24,541 - Jane. - Mmm. 565 00:36:24,625 --> 00:36:25,791 And Ethan. 566 00:36:26,916 --> 00:36:28,916 Everything all right? 567 00:36:29,000 --> 00:36:31,291 Yeah, yeah. They just wanted to say goodnight. 568 00:36:41,291 --> 00:36:42,458 Guilt. 569 00:36:49,958 --> 00:36:51,291 I don't know. 570 00:36:56,458 --> 00:37:00,875 I think I'm over my obsession with being a good person, 571 00:37:03,083 --> 00:37:04,333 - you know? - Mm-hmm. 572 00:37:04,416 --> 00:37:08,583 Constantly checking to make sure I'm doing the right thing. 573 00:37:11,208 --> 00:37:13,250 I don't really have that need anymore, for... 574 00:37:14,333 --> 00:37:16,083 moral superiority. 575 00:37:17,333 --> 00:37:19,416 I'm no better than anybody else. It's okay. 576 00:37:21,500 --> 00:37:22,708 Okay. 577 00:37:24,125 --> 00:37:25,166 What? 578 00:37:26,083 --> 00:37:28,000 Just not totally buying it. 579 00:37:30,375 --> 00:37:32,375 Touché. 580 00:37:35,375 --> 00:37:37,083 I'm not saying I'm proud of it. 581 00:37:39,041 --> 00:37:41,958 The affairs. But, you know... 582 00:37:42,041 --> 00:37:43,208 Mm-hmm? 583 00:37:43,291 --> 00:37:47,041 I just realized that there's things that... 584 00:37:48,000 --> 00:37:50,500 I mean, I have needs that I'm not... 585 00:37:50,583 --> 00:37:53,208 - willing to ignore anymore. - Mm-hmm. 586 00:37:53,291 --> 00:37:57,875 And, you know, that's just how it is for me right now. 587 00:37:57,958 --> 00:38:00,333 Just accepting that. That's okay. 588 00:38:02,208 --> 00:38:03,583 "Affairs," plural? 589 00:38:07,875 --> 00:38:11,625 Yeah, I had... I had something six months ago. 590 00:38:13,000 --> 00:38:14,208 It was meaningless. 591 00:38:17,291 --> 00:38:21,833 Two somethings if you count one-night stands, 592 00:38:23,541 --> 00:38:24,916 which I don't, so. 593 00:38:28,000 --> 00:38:29,250 Well... 594 00:38:30,708 --> 00:38:34,083 Maybe you have lost your moral superiority. 595 00:38:34,166 --> 00:38:36,500 That doesn't sound very good when you say it. 596 00:38:36,583 --> 00:38:38,000 It's like, what? 597 00:38:38,083 --> 00:38:40,208 I'm the last person to judge. 598 00:38:54,666 --> 00:38:56,625 I didn't want to marry her. 599 00:38:59,000 --> 00:39:01,541 I'm not saying that as a justification for anything. 600 00:39:01,625 --> 00:39:02,875 It's just the truth. 601 00:39:05,291 --> 00:39:08,750 But we had a really good time together. 602 00:39:08,833 --> 00:39:12,250 And, you know, sometimes it's easy to confuse 603 00:39:12,333 --> 00:39:14,000 great sex with love. 604 00:39:14,500 --> 00:39:16,250 Easy for you. 605 00:39:16,333 --> 00:39:18,250 I don't think it's just me. 606 00:39:20,666 --> 00:39:24,083 But she got pregnant. 607 00:39:25,291 --> 00:39:27,041 And, um... 608 00:39:27,125 --> 00:39:30,125 - I really wanted that kid. - Hmm. 609 00:39:30,208 --> 00:39:32,458 And, you know, she wanted to get married. 610 00:39:32,541 --> 00:39:34,041 And I just thought, why not? 611 00:39:34,125 --> 00:39:36,000 What's the difference between living together 612 00:39:36,083 --> 00:39:37,250 and getting married? 613 00:39:37,791 --> 00:39:39,125 So I said yes. 614 00:39:41,958 --> 00:39:43,625 Then Ethan was born. 615 00:39:45,583 --> 00:39:47,791 And he's just... ugh. 616 00:39:51,041 --> 00:39:52,750 That's really great. 617 00:39:52,833 --> 00:39:54,375 The sex is not. 618 00:39:54,458 --> 00:39:55,541 Well... 619 00:39:55,625 --> 00:39:58,500 It's not happening at all. 620 00:39:58,583 --> 00:40:00,333 But that, you know, since Ethan was born, 621 00:40:00,416 --> 00:40:03,083 so, obviously. 622 00:40:03,166 --> 00:40:06,083 But, um, you know, we're good. We're good. 623 00:40:07,458 --> 00:40:11,208 It's like we have a common language. 624 00:40:11,291 --> 00:40:14,125 It's like meeting somebody that speaks your language. 625 00:40:14,208 --> 00:40:16,083 I realized that she's the first Jewish woman 626 00:40:16,166 --> 00:40:17,875 that I've dated since college. 627 00:40:18,583 --> 00:40:20,416 - Really? - Yeah. 628 00:40:20,500 --> 00:40:24,916 Yeah, I didn't... didn't imagine it would be so significant, 629 00:40:25,000 --> 00:40:30,333 like, knowing the same songs and idioms, the holidays, 630 00:40:30,416 --> 00:40:33,625 but it's nice. It's comfortable. 631 00:40:37,750 --> 00:40:39,125 Don't you love her? 632 00:40:40,416 --> 00:40:41,541 Hmm. 633 00:40:44,666 --> 00:40:47,791 Yeah. Yeah, in a certain way. 634 00:40:53,875 --> 00:40:55,791 What if she finds out about us? 635 00:41:00,833 --> 00:41:02,416 Um... 636 00:41:06,291 --> 00:41:08,208 I don't know. 637 00:41:08,291 --> 00:41:11,208 I guess I'm just... I'm not really scared enough... 638 00:41:13,458 --> 00:41:14,750 of splitting up. 639 00:41:16,250 --> 00:41:18,208 In fact, I'm pretty sure it'll happen eventually. 640 00:41:18,291 --> 00:41:20,375 So I don't really have any illusions about that. 641 00:41:30,750 --> 00:41:33,250 I'll never love anybody the way that I loved you. 642 00:41:37,541 --> 00:41:39,333 - It's a fact. - Hmm. 643 00:41:41,666 --> 00:41:45,375 With you, breaking up was just never on the table. 644 00:41:45,458 --> 00:41:46,916 Just never even occurred to me. 645 00:41:50,750 --> 00:41:54,166 So it's just, it's different, entirely different kind of love. 646 00:41:56,166 --> 00:42:00,250 I remember someone said it was like a piece of tape 647 00:42:00,333 --> 00:42:02,458 that you rip off and try to reapply... 648 00:42:05,041 --> 00:42:06,333 that'll stick again maybe, 649 00:42:06,416 --> 00:42:09,000 but it's never going to be like the first time. 650 00:42:12,875 --> 00:42:14,875 It's really sad, what you're saying. 651 00:42:14,958 --> 00:42:16,208 I don't know. I don't think so. 652 00:42:16,291 --> 00:42:18,750 I think it's okay to have different kinds of love. 653 00:42:18,833 --> 00:42:20,083 That's okay. 654 00:42:25,250 --> 00:42:27,166 What? 655 00:42:27,625 --> 00:42:28,833 What? 656 00:42:28,916 --> 00:42:30,851 Just don't act like it's cool, you're never gonna love again. 657 00:42:30,875 --> 00:42:32,041 It's not that s... 658 00:42:32,583 --> 00:42:33,791 I didn't say that. 659 00:42:33,875 --> 00:42:35,458 I mean I'm here with you, aren't I? 660 00:42:35,541 --> 00:42:37,000 It's different with me. I mean, 661 00:42:37,083 --> 00:42:39,125 - it's not the same, obviously. - Why? 662 00:42:39,208 --> 00:42:41,708 Because we've been... 663 00:42:43,166 --> 00:42:44,958 through the worst that could happen. I mean, 664 00:42:45,041 --> 00:42:47,291 there's nothing to be afraid of anymore with me. 665 00:42:47,375 --> 00:42:49,375 Yeah, okay, so maybe that's just... 666 00:42:49,458 --> 00:42:51,750 That's exactly what works for me now. 667 00:42:51,833 --> 00:42:53,458 - For us. - God, Jonathan. 668 00:42:53,541 --> 00:42:54,958 What? What? 669 00:42:56,333 --> 00:42:59,583 Can't you see we're both just so fucked up? 670 00:42:59,666 --> 00:43:02,125 We've barely even started getting over what happened to us 671 00:43:02,208 --> 00:43:03,750 - and... - Yeah, well, it takes time. 672 00:43:03,833 --> 00:43:05,625 Yeah, but it's been four years. 673 00:43:05,708 --> 00:43:09,083 We just keep coming up with all these solutions and like... 674 00:43:10,208 --> 00:43:11,750 Why does it take so long to break up? 675 00:43:11,833 --> 00:43:14,125 And why does no one talk about the fact that 676 00:43:14,208 --> 00:43:16,458 it's this fucking endless trauma? 677 00:43:19,583 --> 00:43:21,458 Well, it... 678 00:43:21,541 --> 00:43:24,833 It is second on the list of most stressful life events. 679 00:43:26,625 --> 00:43:27,958 Before moving. 680 00:43:33,000 --> 00:43:34,875 After death of a loved one. 681 00:43:38,416 --> 00:43:40,375 So... 682 00:43:40,458 --> 00:43:42,916 So we should have a Shiva of our own? 683 00:43:44,291 --> 00:43:45,458 To mourn? 684 00:43:47,541 --> 00:43:48,583 Yes. 685 00:43:54,750 --> 00:43:57,208 We won't leave the house for seven days. 686 00:44:00,375 --> 00:44:02,750 Everyone will come and console us. 687 00:44:02,833 --> 00:44:03,875 Mm-hmm. 688 00:44:05,083 --> 00:44:08,791 And we won't eat meat or drink wine. 689 00:44:08,875 --> 00:44:11,333 - Mm-hmm. - Or shower. 690 00:44:12,833 --> 00:44:14,416 I can work with that. 691 00:44:15,750 --> 00:44:18,458 We won't cut our hair or shave. 692 00:44:21,750 --> 00:44:22,750 Done. 693 00:44:24,041 --> 00:44:25,375 No sex. 694 00:44:27,000 --> 00:44:28,916 What? That's forbidden too? 695 00:44:30,083 --> 00:44:31,125 Totally. 696 00:46:34,708 --> 00:46:36,250 What is it? What's wrong? 697 00:46:39,208 --> 00:46:40,500 Did you have a nightmare? 698 00:46:42,750 --> 00:46:45,125 - What was it? - Oh, God... 699 00:46:49,791 --> 00:46:51,166 We were driving. 700 00:46:57,375 --> 00:46:58,916 Oh, fuck. 701 00:47:13,958 --> 00:47:15,625 Oh, my God. 702 00:47:18,166 --> 00:47:20,083 Oh, fuck. 703 00:47:21,958 --> 00:47:23,208 What? 704 00:47:26,375 --> 00:47:27,750 We were, um... 705 00:47:29,000 --> 00:47:33,250 We were driving to Lawrence to see my parents 706 00:47:33,333 --> 00:47:36,916 and, um, Ava was with us. 707 00:47:39,541 --> 00:47:42,083 We were on the highway. 708 00:47:42,166 --> 00:47:44,666 There was an accident and there was terrible traffic 709 00:47:44,750 --> 00:47:47,208 for miles and miles, and so I... 710 00:47:47,291 --> 00:47:50,458 I said to you, "Let's go back home on foot." 711 00:47:50,541 --> 00:47:53,375 But we had to cross to the other lane. 712 00:47:53,458 --> 00:47:55,708 - And you and Ava crossed. - Mm-hmm. 713 00:47:55,791 --> 00:47:58,541 But I didn't... I couldn't... You had to push the cars 714 00:47:58,625 --> 00:48:00,291 - to get through them. - Mm-hmm. 715 00:48:00,375 --> 00:48:03,458 Like, you had to physically push them away from each other. 716 00:48:03,541 --> 00:48:05,833 But it... but it turns out I didn't have any hands. 717 00:48:05,916 --> 00:48:08,875 I just had like stumps, like, nothing from the elbows down. 718 00:48:08,958 --> 00:48:11,833 So like, I... it was impossible for me to reach you guys. 719 00:48:11,916 --> 00:48:14,291 Oh, I'm sorry. 720 00:48:17,041 --> 00:48:18,291 Hey, come here. 721 00:48:19,541 --> 00:48:20,708 It's cold. 722 00:48:37,208 --> 00:48:38,708 Hmm. 723 00:48:42,041 --> 00:48:43,875 You want some water? 724 00:48:43,958 --> 00:48:45,541 - No. - No? 725 00:48:49,041 --> 00:48:50,958 You know, I could make us some coffee. 726 00:48:51,041 --> 00:48:52,666 Maybe it's time that we get up anyway. 727 00:48:52,750 --> 00:48:55,375 No, don't go, don't go anywhere. Just stay. Just stay. 728 00:48:55,458 --> 00:48:56,500 Okay. 729 00:48:56,583 --> 00:48:57,791 Just stay. 730 00:49:01,916 --> 00:49:03,708 Do you remember anything else? 731 00:49:03,791 --> 00:49:05,458 I'm trying to remember. 732 00:49:09,333 --> 00:49:11,500 You know, yesterday... 733 00:49:13,291 --> 00:49:16,041 - My mom has this notebook... - Mm-hmm. 734 00:49:16,125 --> 00:49:18,750 Where she wrote down a bunch of things 735 00:49:18,833 --> 00:49:22,125 when I was little, like, you know, 736 00:49:22,208 --> 00:49:26,708 anecdotes and medical stuff, and dreams. 737 00:49:26,791 --> 00:49:27,875 That's really sweet. 738 00:49:27,958 --> 00:49:29,875 Yeah, we were looking at it together yesterday. 739 00:49:31,166 --> 00:49:33,958 And there was this one time that she wrote about 740 00:49:34,041 --> 00:49:36,166 when I woke up in the middle of the night, 741 00:49:36,250 --> 00:49:37,767 I was like three years old or something, and... 742 00:49:37,791 --> 00:49:39,166 - Mm-hmm. - I came into the room 743 00:49:39,250 --> 00:49:41,791 and I was just standing there in the middle of the room 744 00:49:41,875 --> 00:49:43,291 and I said, "I can't sleep. 745 00:49:43,375 --> 00:49:45,375 All my dreams are really boring." 746 00:49:47,625 --> 00:49:49,583 And I said to her yesterday, I was like, 747 00:49:49,666 --> 00:49:52,333 "You got it back then, right? You got... you understood 748 00:49:52,416 --> 00:49:57,375 that 'boring' actually meant scary, right?" 749 00:49:58,625 --> 00:50:00,265 And she said, "What are you talking about? 750 00:50:00,291 --> 00:50:03,250 No, you were so cute, no, you didn't look scared at all." 751 00:50:07,125 --> 00:50:10,250 She just was incapable of... 752 00:50:12,416 --> 00:50:13,708 She couldn't... 753 00:50:22,375 --> 00:50:24,125 Sometimes, I feel... 754 00:50:27,083 --> 00:50:29,708 like I'm not sure if I have the ability... 755 00:50:34,916 --> 00:50:36,833 like if I've ever really... 756 00:50:39,500 --> 00:50:41,375 truly loved anyone. 757 00:50:44,708 --> 00:50:47,958 Or if I've ever really been loved. 758 00:50:48,041 --> 00:50:49,916 Okay, now you're being dramatic. 759 00:50:53,041 --> 00:50:54,541 - Am I? - Yes. 760 00:50:57,416 --> 00:50:58,750 I love you. 761 00:51:00,458 --> 00:51:03,041 And I always have, in my own... 762 00:51:04,291 --> 00:51:06,458 deranged way. 763 00:51:09,416 --> 00:51:14,083 And you love me in your own complicated way. 764 00:51:15,416 --> 00:51:17,416 And you'll always love me. 765 00:51:52,500 --> 00:51:54,458 "In the middle of the night, 766 00:51:57,041 --> 00:51:59,166 without any fanfare, 767 00:52:00,166 --> 00:52:04,083 in a dark house somewhere in the world." 768 00:52:07,541 --> 00:52:08,875 What's that? 769 00:52:10,166 --> 00:52:12,833 Mmm, it's from a movie. 770 00:52:14,625 --> 00:52:15,791 Hmm. 771 00:52:44,333 --> 00:52:47,291 - Okay. Let's cut. - All right, we cut. 772 00:52:51,000 --> 00:52:52,458 Here you are, guys. 773 00:55:28,190 --> 00:55:30,190 >>>>oakislandtk<<<<< www.opensubtitles.org 54462

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