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1
00:00:01,127 --> 00:00:02,211
- That's right, Don Drippy.
2
00:00:02,212 --> 00:00:03,629
I'll see you in one hour
3
00:00:03,630 --> 00:00:05,714
for the renegotiation
of your contract.
4
00:00:05,715 --> 00:00:07,341
And that is what happened
5
00:00:07,342 --> 00:00:09,927
in the phone call I had 30
minutes ago with Don Drippy.
6
00:00:09,928 --> 00:00:12,137
- That was a very
good re-creation.
7
00:00:12,138 --> 00:00:14,473
- It's crazy that my
dad gave his buddy's
8
00:00:14,474 --> 00:00:16,809
experimental fast-melting
ice cream franchise
9
00:00:16,810 --> 00:00:19,186
exclusive rights to
operate in New Utopia.
10
00:00:19,187 --> 00:00:21,939
- I love Drippy Drips.
It's fun because it melts.
11
00:00:21,940 --> 00:00:23,148
You have to eat it fast,
12
00:00:23,149 --> 00:00:24,900
otherwise you get milky fingers.
13
00:00:24,901 --> 00:00:26,944
Sometimes I eat it
slow on purpose.
14
00:00:26,945 --> 00:00:29,488
It's licky-licky-licky good!
15
00:00:29,489 --> 00:00:31,699
- Are you saying slogans,
or are those your opinions?
16
00:00:31,700 --> 00:00:33,659
- I don't know.
- This has to change.
17
00:00:33,660 --> 00:00:35,452
It's hot out. I
want ice cream.
18
00:00:35,453 --> 00:00:36,829
And there's only one kind
19
00:00:36,830 --> 00:00:38,622
because of this binding contract
20
00:00:38,623 --> 00:00:40,249
signed in barbecue sauce.
21
00:00:40,250 --> 00:00:42,501
- Wait. There's other
kinds of iced cream?
22
00:00:42,502 --> 00:00:45,045
- Okay, weird way to say
that but, yes, Wife Joslyn.
23
00:00:45,046 --> 00:00:46,839
Every self-respecting town
24
00:00:46,840 --> 00:00:49,216
needs at least four competing
ice cream options...
25
00:00:49,217 --> 00:00:50,759
Two hard, one soft,
26
00:00:50,760 --> 00:00:53,470
and one that serves creepy
savory flavors no one likes
27
00:00:53,471 --> 00:00:55,556
but that make you feel smart.
- Ha!
28
00:00:55,557 --> 00:00:59,143
Limiting choice was one of your
father's mechanisms of control.
29
00:00:59,144 --> 00:01:01,353
Don't you know anything?
- Oh, shut up, Bandit.
30
00:01:01,354 --> 00:01:03,939
I have a big day doing
good things for the cult.
31
00:01:03,940 --> 00:01:05,482
- And I'm doing good things
32
00:01:05,483 --> 00:01:07,985
for the town that the cult
does its dirty dealings in.
33
00:01:07,986 --> 00:01:10,070
I'm running for mayor!
34
00:01:10,071 --> 00:01:12,656
- Isn't that more of
a ceremonial position?
35
00:01:12,657 --> 00:01:14,742
- We love you, Mayor Pancakes!
36
00:01:14,743 --> 00:01:16,285
- He's a dog!
37
00:01:16,286 --> 00:01:19,455
- Every self-respecting
town needs a real mayor.
38
00:01:19,456 --> 00:01:21,206
And when I win...
39
00:01:21,207 --> 00:01:22,583
- You'll be in serious trouble.
40
00:01:22,584 --> 00:01:23,917
Vote for Bandit.
41
00:01:23,918 --> 00:01:25,336
I'm not a dog.
42
00:01:25,337 --> 00:01:26,837
- That was hot.
43
00:01:26,838 --> 00:01:28,422
- I mean, sort of.
44
00:01:28,423 --> 00:01:30,341
Valve, turn it?
45
00:01:30,342 --> 00:01:31,675
You want me to turn?
46
00:01:31,676 --> 00:01:33,552
- People need to enter
with more context.
47
00:01:33,553 --> 00:01:34,762
- Name's Dearl.
48
00:01:34,763 --> 00:01:37,056
I release built-up
gas from swamps.
49
00:01:37,057 --> 00:01:38,932
I've been doing it for years.
50
00:01:38,933 --> 00:01:41,560
I live by my own
terms. Can't complain.
51
00:01:41,561 --> 00:01:43,687
Your swamp out back... it's due.
52
00:01:43,688 --> 00:01:44,897
- Yeah, sure, go for it.
53
00:01:44,898 --> 00:01:46,523
- The gas builds up otherwise,
54
00:01:46,524 --> 00:01:49,401
gets real dangerous if you
don't have a tolerance.
55
00:01:49,402 --> 00:01:50,736
I have a tolerance.
56
00:01:50,737 --> 00:01:52,154
- Take yes for an answer.
57
00:01:52,155 --> 00:01:53,822
I'm sorry. I have ice
cream all over me.
58
00:01:53,823 --> 00:01:54,990
- I work in swamps.
59
00:01:54,991 --> 00:01:56,658
I'm not impressed by
a little ice cream.
60
00:01:56,659 --> 00:01:57,701
Mmm.
61
00:01:57,702 --> 00:01:59,203
- Ugh!
62
00:01:59,204 --> 00:02:01,413
I have had enough of hot
men getting in my way today.
63
00:02:01,414 --> 00:02:03,374
- Can I have permission to
have heard what he said?
64
00:02:03,375 --> 00:02:05,709
- Yeah. Why?
- He's releasing the swamp gas!
65
00:02:05,710 --> 00:02:07,836
Whoo-hoo!
- Huh?
66
00:02:09,881 --> 00:02:11,465
Oh, no, tambourines.
67
00:02:14,177 --> 00:02:17,179
Swamp day.
68
00:02:18,431 --> 00:02:20,057
- The gas makes
everyone go insane.
69
00:02:20,058 --> 00:02:21,225
It's kind of why I asked.
70
00:02:21,226 --> 00:02:23,310
Good luck getting
anything done today.
71
00:02:45,166 --> 00:02:46,625
- Mae Mae, I need you to help me
72
00:02:46,626 --> 00:02:48,043
put the gas back in the swamp.
73
00:02:48,044 --> 00:02:50,379
I have to focus on
girl-boss business business.
74
00:02:50,380 --> 00:02:54,341
- Oh, honey, you can't shove
a crazy baby back in its mama.
75
00:02:54,342 --> 00:02:56,260
That thing's alive.
76
00:02:56,261 --> 00:02:57,845
- Okay, can someone
explain this to me?
77
00:02:57,846 --> 00:02:59,012
- I can explain it.
78
00:02:59,013 --> 00:03:00,848
Elder Amos, entering
with context.
79
00:03:00,849 --> 00:03:02,724
I was your father's
personal scientist.
80
00:03:02,725 --> 00:03:04,726
You can trust me. I discovered
that copper kills sperm.
81
00:03:04,727 --> 00:03:06,145
Don't ask how.
82
00:03:06,146 --> 00:03:09,148
- Your father founded
New Utopia on a swamp,
83
00:03:09,149 --> 00:03:11,066
which is Latin
for "sloppy land."
84
00:03:11,067 --> 00:03:13,819
And this sloppy land gives
off something we call gas,
85
00:03:13,820 --> 00:03:15,654
but the ancients
called "swamp farts."
86
00:03:15,655 --> 00:03:17,364
Let me know if I
should slow down.
87
00:03:17,365 --> 00:03:19,491
You see, once a year,
our leader authorizes
88
00:03:19,492 --> 00:03:21,285
the safe release of
this gas pressure
89
00:03:21,286 --> 00:03:22,619
into our town's atmosphere.
90
00:03:22,620 --> 00:03:24,371
Now, how long does
this gas last?
91
00:03:24,372 --> 00:03:27,875
This gas lasts roughly
12 Earth hours.
92
00:03:28,960 --> 00:03:30,294
- It is a psychoactive chemical
93
00:03:30,295 --> 00:03:32,129
that unleashes a
highly anticipated,
94
00:03:32,130 --> 00:03:33,964
consequence-free
day of debauchery...
95
00:03:33,965 --> 00:03:35,799
Sort of like "The
Purge," only freakier.
96
00:03:35,800 --> 00:03:37,593
The gas shows people
their true selves.
97
00:03:37,594 --> 00:03:38,969
And most people's true selves
98
00:03:38,970 --> 00:03:40,721
are hornier than
they'd like to admit.
99
00:03:40,722 --> 00:03:42,598
But it can also
cause "crazification"
100
00:03:42,599 --> 00:03:43,891
of the following brain areas...
101
00:03:43,892 --> 00:03:46,226
The personality lobe,
the inhibitions lobe,
102
00:03:46,227 --> 00:03:48,645
the hallucination lobe, and,
of course, the brain penis.
103
00:03:48,646 --> 00:03:50,272
Hmm.
104
00:03:50,273 --> 00:03:51,440
Swamp prank.
105
00:03:53,276 --> 00:03:55,402
- And the prank lobe.
106
00:03:58,656 --> 00:04:01,283
- Man, swamp day
came late this year.
107
00:04:01,284 --> 00:04:03,285
We sealed this
place up right in time.
108
00:04:03,286 --> 00:04:04,703
I don't mind sloppy drunks,
109
00:04:04,704 --> 00:04:06,747
but sloppy gas drunks
think nothing counts.
110
00:04:08,458 --> 00:04:09,875
I hate that banner.
111
00:04:09,876 --> 00:04:11,960
- Mm, I felt good
about that pee.
112
00:04:11,961 --> 00:04:13,712
Why is the door a wall now?
113
00:04:13,713 --> 00:04:15,923
- It's surprise gas day,
and I'm sitting it out.
114
00:04:15,924 --> 00:04:18,133
- But if we're all sealed up,
we're gonna miss all the fun.
115
00:04:18,134 --> 00:04:19,801
- Well, too bad.
116
00:04:19,802 --> 00:04:22,137
We're gonna hunker down
together and have a normal day.
117
00:04:22,138 --> 00:04:24,389
Swamp gas is not my
drug, okay? Not for me.
118
00:04:24,390 --> 00:04:26,141
Natural highs freak me out.
119
00:04:27,477 --> 00:04:28,727
- Oops.
120
00:04:28,728 --> 00:04:30,062
- Big Judy, how could you?
121
00:04:30,063 --> 00:04:31,688
This is going to be the worst...
122
00:04:31,689 --> 00:04:33,649
Oh.
- Atta girl.
123
00:04:33,650 --> 00:04:37,569
Buckle up, kids! We're
on the G Train now.
124
00:04:43,284 --> 00:04:44,826
- Snake! I knew you were low,
125
00:04:44,827 --> 00:04:47,037
but to release swamp
gas on Election Day?
126
00:04:47,038 --> 00:04:49,706
You did this to sabotage me!
- Why would I do that?
127
00:04:49,707 --> 00:04:52,376
I have my own lean-in
pantsuit stuff to do today.
128
00:04:52,377 --> 00:04:54,753
Swamp prank.
129
00:04:54,754 --> 00:04:56,296
- If you were so good on policy,
130
00:04:56,297 --> 00:04:58,006
you'd know that if I
didn't release the gas,
131
00:04:58,007 --> 00:04:59,550
this town would explode.
132
00:04:59,551 --> 00:05:01,385
Is that what you want as mayor?
133
00:05:01,386 --> 00:05:04,054
An exploded town?
134
00:05:04,055 --> 00:05:06,640
- You know I don't want that!
135
00:05:06,641 --> 00:05:08,684
What I want is a fair race.
136
00:05:08,685 --> 00:05:10,477
The mayor is licking me.
137
00:05:10,478 --> 00:05:13,063
- If your campaign can't
handle a little gas,
138
00:05:13,064 --> 00:05:14,064
that's on you.
139
00:05:14,065 --> 00:05:15,399
- Oh, I can handle it.
140
00:05:18,278 --> 00:05:20,529
Mmm.
141
00:05:20,530 --> 00:05:23,156
- ? I take offense
you're on the fence ?
142
00:05:23,157 --> 00:05:24,741
? My self-defense... ?
143
00:05:24,742 --> 00:05:25,868
- Ooh.
- Aah.
144
00:05:25,869 --> 00:05:27,619
So can I.
145
00:05:27,620 --> 00:05:29,288
Just have to keep it
together for the deal.
146
00:05:29,289 --> 00:05:31,206
Keeping it "profesh"
while volcanically horny
147
00:05:31,207 --> 00:05:33,000
is one of the special
skills on my r�sum�,
148
00:05:33,001 --> 00:05:34,668
right next to
conversational Mandarin.
149
00:05:34,669 --> 00:05:36,086
No one checks.
150
00:05:36,087 --> 00:05:38,088
- And I just have
to keep it together
151
00:05:38,089 --> 00:05:40,173
to out-campaign a
golden retriever.
152
00:05:40,174 --> 00:05:43,218
Making dogs look bad is also
one of my special skills.
153
00:05:43,219 --> 00:05:44,886
Vote for Bandit for horny!
154
00:05:44,887 --> 00:05:46,763
Mayor, mayor! Horny mayor!
155
00:05:46,764 --> 00:05:49,182
Good God, I got to
get out of here.
156
00:05:51,853 --> 00:05:53,770
- Whoo-hoo!
157
00:05:56,941 --> 00:05:58,650
Aah!
158
00:05:58,651 --> 00:06:00,360
- Oh, this is not good.
159
00:06:00,361 --> 00:06:01,987
Not good.
160
00:06:01,988 --> 00:06:03,739
Okay, Petey, focus on yourself.
161
00:06:03,740 --> 00:06:06,199
You can do this as long as
nobody hot comes around.
162
00:06:06,200 --> 00:06:07,951
And how hot could
some ice cream man be?
163
00:06:12,206 --> 00:06:14,666
Oh, no.
164
00:06:14,667 --> 00:06:16,543
Silver fox.
165
00:06:16,544 --> 00:06:18,378
Let's go, girl. Come on.
166
00:06:18,379 --> 00:06:20,047
Mr. Petey, I'm Drippy.
167
00:06:20,048 --> 00:06:21,214
Sorry, I'm dripping.
168
00:06:21,215 --> 00:06:23,050
Sorry. Hi. I'm hot old man.
169
00:06:23,051 --> 00:06:25,677
One more time... Hi. I would
like to suck your old.
170
00:06:25,678 --> 00:06:28,347
My bad. Hi, there. I'm
Petey. Soon we.
171
00:06:28,348 --> 00:06:29,431
Ah! One more time.
172
00:06:29,432 --> 00:06:30,807
Hello, sex dad.
173
00:06:30,808 --> 00:06:31,934
No. Hi.
174
00:06:31,935 --> 00:06:33,477
Hi, Don. Oh, there it is. Ha!
175
00:06:33,478 --> 00:06:35,854
We have a lot of
business to discuss.
176
00:06:35,855 --> 00:06:37,940
- Well, we should probably
get comfortable, then.
177
00:06:37,941 --> 00:06:39,775
I am going to pop a button.
178
00:06:44,697 --> 00:06:45,949
- Ooh!
179
00:06:47,700 --> 00:06:49,952
- Thanks for, uh, making
the trip, Mr. Drippy.
180
00:06:49,953 --> 00:06:51,620
- Wonderful to meet you.
181
00:06:51,621 --> 00:06:53,914
Your father was a dear friend,
and you look just like him...
182
00:06:53,915 --> 00:06:56,125
Well, with some key differences.
183
00:06:58,002 --> 00:07:00,170
I have a feeling
we can get this settled
184
00:07:00,171 --> 00:07:01,338
in three minutes or less.
185
00:07:01,339 --> 00:07:02,589
Here's a new contract.
186
00:07:02,590 --> 00:07:04,549
Could you sign it in
a not-hot way, please?
187
00:07:04,550 --> 00:07:05,842
Thank you.
- Whoa, now.
188
00:07:05,843 --> 00:07:07,302
Buy a girl a drink first.
189
00:07:07,303 --> 00:07:09,012
Your dad and I never
got into the specifics.
190
00:07:09,013 --> 00:07:10,263
We'd go out on the town,
191
00:07:10,264 --> 00:07:12,015
and we'd let Mae
Mae handle all that.
192
00:07:12,016 --> 00:07:13,225
But I like your moxie.
193
00:07:13,226 --> 00:07:15,185
- Um, which part
of me is my moxie?
194
00:07:15,186 --> 00:07:16,436
I'm sorry.
195
00:07:16,437 --> 00:07:18,313
- I apologize as well.
196
00:07:19,691 --> 00:07:21,441
This contract may have
worked for my dad,
197
00:07:21,442 --> 00:07:22,651
but it does not work for me.
198
00:07:22,652 --> 00:07:24,236
It makes no sense.
- I know, right?
199
00:07:24,237 --> 00:07:26,238
Best deal I ever made.
200
00:07:26,239 --> 00:07:28,448
- Well, your sweet,
milky gravy train
201
00:07:28,449 --> 00:07:30,409
is coming to a screeching halt.
202
00:07:30,410 --> 00:07:32,035
- Oh, asking me to sign
203
00:07:32,036 --> 00:07:34,454
before we've even had
a little country fun.
204
00:07:34,455 --> 00:07:35,997
Well, if this is a negotiation,
205
00:07:35,998 --> 00:07:38,208
I'm going to need
something in return.
206
00:07:41,087 --> 00:07:42,212
Mm.
207
00:07:42,213 --> 00:07:43,797
Can we get a cleanup?
208
00:07:43,798 --> 00:07:46,258
Oh, Wife Beth? I didn't
know you worked here.
209
00:07:46,259 --> 00:07:48,343
- That's because you
never ask about me.
210
00:07:48,344 --> 00:07:50,846
The gas makes me full of rage.
211
00:07:50,847 --> 00:07:52,013
- Oh.
212
00:07:52,014 --> 00:07:53,473
Pardon me, Mr. Drippy.
213
00:07:53,474 --> 00:07:56,017
We both need to cool
down. We'll be right back.
214
00:07:56,018 --> 00:07:57,769
Aah!
215
00:07:57,770 --> 00:07:59,646
- Now, that's not as cold
as a regular freezer.
216
00:07:59,647 --> 00:08:02,107
That's 37 degrees. That's
just right on the edge.
217
00:08:02,108 --> 00:08:03,900
- Give him something in return?
218
00:08:03,901 --> 00:08:06,528
Ugh, this guy's really
trying to sleep with me here.
219
00:08:06,529 --> 00:08:09,406
I'm trying to screw him
over, not screw him.
220
00:08:09,407 --> 00:08:11,366
- He's not horny for you.
221
00:08:11,367 --> 00:08:14,286
He thinks you're an
exceptional young woman.
222
00:08:14,287 --> 00:08:17,456
- Like, he's just proud of me?
223
00:08:17,457 --> 00:08:20,333
Everyone's
proud of Petey.
224
00:08:20,334 --> 00:08:23,086
- Oh, my God, he has
a daughter crush.
225
00:08:23,087 --> 00:08:25,380
- Oh, look, Petey's catching on.
226
00:08:25,381 --> 00:08:26,798
- That magical dynamic
227
00:08:26,799 --> 00:08:28,800
where an older guy
sees himself in you
228
00:08:28,801 --> 00:08:30,927
and he's blind to all
your obvious flaws.
229
00:08:30,928 --> 00:08:32,721
It's happened to
me a lot, actually.
230
00:08:32,722 --> 00:08:36,183
- Sounds like you have multiple
father figures in your life,
231
00:08:36,184 --> 00:08:37,893
and I have none!
232
00:08:37,894 --> 00:08:40,854
- Me and Daddy Drippy banging
it out... it's off the table!
233
00:08:40,855 --> 00:08:44,316
A daughter crush is not sexual.
It can be a little bittersweet.
234
00:08:44,317 --> 00:08:46,485
- I'm the one who
brought this up to you.
235
00:08:46,486 --> 00:08:49,070
Why do you keep
explaining it to me?
236
00:08:49,071 --> 00:08:51,406
- He'll be the George Shultz
to my Elizabeth Holmes.
237
00:08:51,407 --> 00:08:53,408
The stronger his
daughter crush gets,
238
00:08:53,409 --> 00:08:56,161
the more he loses all sense
of what a good investment is
239
00:08:56,162 --> 00:08:58,580
and the more he'll
do whatever I want.
240
00:08:58,581 --> 00:09:00,290
And that's business.
241
00:09:00,291 --> 00:09:01,541
One thing is certain...
242
00:09:01,542 --> 00:09:03,835
There will be other
ice cream choices
243
00:09:03,836 --> 00:09:05,754
in this town.
244
00:09:05,755 --> 00:09:09,007
- Oh, great! Put
me out of a job!
245
00:09:13,387 --> 00:09:14,638
- Focus up!
246
00:09:14,639 --> 00:09:17,307
A vote for Bandit is
a vote for issues.
247
00:09:17,308 --> 00:09:18,809
- What's with the mask?
248
00:09:18,810 --> 00:09:20,977
- I'm protecting
myself from madness,
249
00:09:20,978 --> 00:09:23,188
the way I would like
to protect this town...
250
00:09:23,189 --> 00:09:24,815
- Ugh. Shut up.
251
00:09:24,816 --> 00:09:26,983
- I mean, imagine
if we had a person
252
00:09:26,984 --> 00:09:28,443
to stand up to the cult leader
253
00:09:28,444 --> 00:09:30,403
and not just a dog.
254
00:09:30,404 --> 00:09:31,780
- But I like dogs.
255
00:09:31,781 --> 00:09:33,240
- I like dogs, too.
256
00:09:33,241 --> 00:09:35,742
Look, I don't want to
disparage my opponent.
257
00:09:35,743 --> 00:09:38,703
I just wish there was a way
to get all your attention
258
00:09:38,704 --> 00:09:41,498
so you could compare
my platform to his.
259
00:09:41,499 --> 00:09:45,294
- Oh, I can think of something.
260
00:09:47,171 --> 00:09:50,882
Hello, and welcome to the
New Utopia Mayoral Debate.
261
00:09:52,426 --> 00:09:54,678
The first question
is for you both.
262
00:09:54,679 --> 00:09:56,096
Who's a good boy?
263
00:09:56,097 --> 00:09:58,515
Mayor Pancakes, you
have 30 seconds.
264
00:09:59,725 --> 00:10:01,476
I like him!
265
00:10:01,477 --> 00:10:02,978
He's like me!
266
00:10:02,979 --> 00:10:05,814
- He's someone you
could have a beer with!
267
00:10:05,815 --> 00:10:07,065
- What?
- Hey, Bandee?
268
00:10:07,066 --> 00:10:08,483
- Petey?
269
00:10:08,484 --> 00:10:11,778
- No, it's Polly, your
girlfriend, remember?
270
00:10:11,779 --> 00:10:13,989
Boop.
- Polly, right, right.
271
00:10:13,990 --> 00:10:15,615
- Why don't you
take off your mask?
272
00:10:15,616 --> 00:10:17,325
Your face polls really well,
273
00:10:17,326 --> 00:10:19,369
and you're kind of
sounding anti-dog.
274
00:10:19,370 --> 00:10:21,705
- I can't risk Petey's
gas getting to me today.
275
00:10:21,706 --> 00:10:24,416
I'm running an honest,
issues-driven campaign.
276
00:10:24,417 --> 00:10:26,918
Mayor Pancakes is, of
course, a good boy,
277
00:10:26,919 --> 00:10:28,962
but he's a bad
mayor.
278
00:10:28,963 --> 00:10:32,174
- You say our mayor is
bad because he is a dog.
279
00:10:32,175 --> 00:10:34,342
I say, okay.
280
00:10:34,343 --> 00:10:35,719
No, there was more.
281
00:10:35,720 --> 00:10:38,054
I say, tell us your human plan.
282
00:10:38,055 --> 00:10:40,140
What will you do as mayor?
283
00:10:40,141 --> 00:10:44,019
- Well, uh, jobs,
education, environment.
284
00:10:44,020 --> 00:10:46,229
- Those are issue areas.
What are your policies?
285
00:10:46,230 --> 00:10:48,732
Uh...
286
00:10:48,733 --> 00:10:50,525
- Babe, show face.
287
00:10:54,030 --> 00:10:55,906
Look at me.
288
00:10:55,907 --> 00:10:58,366
I'm cute, too.
289
00:10:58,367 --> 00:11:01,286
He makes a really good point.
290
00:11:01,287 --> 00:11:02,829
- Now, let's have a beer.
291
00:11:02,830 --> 00:11:05,123
I'm someone you
can do that with.
292
00:11:06,667 --> 00:11:08,460
- But if there are
other people around,
293
00:11:08,461 --> 00:11:10,754
then, yes, the size
of the yacht matters,
294
00:11:10,755 --> 00:11:12,923
but the speed of
the yacht matters,
295
00:11:12,924 --> 00:11:14,799
and maybe that's the distinction
296
00:11:14,800 --> 00:11:16,384
that you need to
kind of internalize.
297
00:11:16,385 --> 00:11:18,094
- Huh, amazing story.
298
00:11:18,095 --> 00:11:20,222
My question was
about the contract.
299
00:11:20,223 --> 00:11:21,806
- You focus me beautifully.
300
00:11:21,807 --> 00:11:24,184
My adult daughter is
such a disappointment.
301
00:11:24,185 --> 00:11:25,727
She makes these necklaces.
302
00:11:25,728 --> 00:11:27,270
Well, she doesn't even make
'em... she has a fabricator.
303
00:11:27,271 --> 00:11:28,855
- Oh, hold that thought.
- No, no, no.
304
00:11:28,856 --> 00:11:30,815
Take your time. There is a
lesson in this, so I do want...
305
00:11:30,816 --> 00:11:32,109
Yeah, yeah, yeah,
we'll get back.
306
00:11:35,821 --> 00:11:37,530
- May I help you?
307
00:11:37,531 --> 00:11:40,283
- Okay, Dearl, I know I
didn't impress you before,
308
00:11:40,284 --> 00:11:42,118
but I need to ask you a favor.
309
00:11:42,119 --> 00:11:44,788
I've got a zaddy here with a
red-hot daughter crush on me...
310
00:11:44,789 --> 00:11:47,332
Not perverted... and we're
renegotiating a contract,
311
00:11:47,333 --> 00:11:49,042
but he doesn't want
to talk business.
312
00:11:49,043 --> 00:11:50,752
He just wants to tell me
about dinners he's had
313
00:11:50,753 --> 00:11:52,254
and talk shit about his kids.
314
00:11:52,255 --> 00:11:55,173
I got to get him so loose that
he lets me set the agenda.
315
00:11:55,174 --> 00:11:56,716
I need more gas.
316
00:11:56,717 --> 00:11:58,385
Think you could
make that happen?
317
00:11:58,386 --> 00:12:00,762
- I just want everyone to
enjoy this gift from the swamp,
318
00:12:00,763 --> 00:12:02,430
no matter what the intentions.
319
00:12:02,431 --> 00:12:04,849
- You're more of a
philosopher than is necessary
320
00:12:04,850 --> 00:12:06,650
for your function, but
I appreciate it, Dearl.
321
00:12:08,187 --> 00:12:11,564
- The gas makes you think
about things in a new way.
322
00:12:11,565 --> 00:12:13,650
- Everybody go around and
say one thing about your life
323
00:12:13,651 --> 00:12:14,985
that freaks you
out... I'll start.
324
00:12:14,986 --> 00:12:16,695
Sometimes I see
things in my head
325
00:12:16,696 --> 00:12:19,197
that haven't happened
yet, but then they do.
326
00:12:19,198 --> 00:12:21,032
- I feel like there's so much
I wanted to do with my life
327
00:12:21,033 --> 00:12:22,075
that I didn't do.
328
00:12:22,076 --> 00:12:23,994
- Like what, fellow traveler?
329
00:12:23,995 --> 00:12:25,787
- I don't know.
I just thought...
330
00:12:25,788 --> 00:12:27,330
I can't say it.
331
00:12:27,331 --> 00:12:29,874
Oh, having dreams
is so humiliating.
332
00:12:29,875 --> 00:12:32,168
- Whatever it is,
let's make it happen
333
00:12:32,169 --> 00:12:33,336
right here in the bar.
334
00:12:33,337 --> 00:12:34,546
- Yes. Whoo-hoo-hoo.
335
00:12:34,547 --> 00:12:35,880
- Who would we even do that?
336
00:12:35,881 --> 00:12:38,508
- We up the gas.
337
00:12:38,509 --> 00:12:40,677
- Big Judy is about
to open the door.
338
00:12:47,351 --> 00:12:48,936
- Yeah-heh-heh!
339
00:12:55,234 --> 00:12:56,776
- So everybody's sad.
340
00:12:56,777 --> 00:12:59,738
We go into the cutest little
balsamic-vinegar store
341
00:12:59,739 --> 00:13:01,197
on Martha's Vineyard.
342
00:13:01,198 --> 00:13:03,199
Turn the corner, lo and
behold, there's a cat...
343
00:13:03,200 --> 00:13:05,201
- Mm-hmm.
- In the store.
344
00:13:05,202 --> 00:13:08,246
- We've got to be close.
He can't go on like this.
345
00:13:08,247 --> 00:13:09,622
- Oh, we're here,
346
00:13:09,623 --> 00:13:12,125
where gas is swamp
and swamp is gas
347
00:13:12,126 --> 00:13:14,377
and gas is me and I am swamp.
348
00:13:14,378 --> 00:13:15,880
Breathe it in, my friends.
349
00:13:18,007 --> 00:13:20,425
- Don, it's been really cool
hearing about different stores
350
00:13:20,426 --> 00:13:22,093
that you frequent when
you go on vacation,
351
00:13:22,094 --> 00:13:23,845
but I'd like to steer
the conversation
352
00:13:23,846 --> 00:13:25,346
back to the contract.
353
00:13:25,347 --> 00:13:28,308
- I told you, I'll hash
it out with Mae Mae later.
354
00:13:30,603 --> 00:13:34,230
Look, I think... I think I'm just
so damn proud of you that I...
355
00:13:34,231 --> 00:13:35,482
I think that's what it is.
356
00:13:35,483 --> 00:13:36,858
- Then you'll be happy to know
357
00:13:36,859 --> 00:13:38,651
you don't have to deal
with Mae Mae anymore.
358
00:13:38,652 --> 00:13:40,362
You're gonna do this
contract with me
359
00:13:40,363 --> 00:13:42,322
because I'm gonna give you
the thing you want most,
360
00:13:42,323 --> 00:13:44,074
and I'm gonna give
it to you right now.
361
00:13:44,075 --> 00:13:46,534
- You'd do that for me?
- Yes.
362
00:13:46,535 --> 00:13:49,454
I will let you take
credit for my success.
363
00:13:49,455 --> 00:13:51,372
- All of it?
- All of it.
364
00:13:51,373 --> 00:13:52,540
- Say more.
365
00:13:52,541 --> 00:13:54,584
- I'll let you stand at a podium
366
00:13:54,585 --> 00:13:57,462
while people film you talking
about how I'm the real deal.
367
00:13:57,463 --> 00:13:58,963
- Oh, my God, yes.
368
00:13:58,964 --> 00:14:01,716
- I'll pose with you for
a profile in "Forbes,"
369
00:14:01,717 --> 00:14:05,804
while I sit and you stand with
a big meaty hand on my shoulder
370
00:14:05,805 --> 00:14:08,181
and a smug look that
says, we're touching.
371
00:14:08,182 --> 00:14:09,265
- Keep going.
372
00:14:09,266 --> 00:14:11,017
- I'll give you the satisfaction
373
00:14:11,018 --> 00:14:13,770
you aren't getting from
your own adult daughter.
374
00:14:13,771 --> 00:14:15,647
- I lose money on
every one of these.
375
00:14:15,648 --> 00:14:17,357
- I'll even let you promote me
376
00:14:17,358 --> 00:14:19,859
to a position I haven't
been prepared for
377
00:14:19,860 --> 00:14:22,112
to give your ethically
questionable company
378
00:14:22,113 --> 00:14:23,905
the veneer of gender equality!
379
00:14:23,906 --> 00:14:25,406
- Oh, God, yeah.
380
00:14:25,407 --> 00:14:28,409
We are dying to fire the
one woman on our board.
381
00:14:28,410 --> 00:14:30,662
She has been
pregnant for months.
382
00:14:30,663 --> 00:14:32,539
Yes!
383
00:14:32,540 --> 00:14:34,874
- Ha ha!
384
00:14:34,875 --> 00:14:36,668
Dearl?
385
00:14:36,669 --> 00:14:37,962
- I'm up. I'm up.
386
00:14:42,424 --> 00:14:43,883
- I'm undecided.
387
00:14:43,884 --> 00:14:46,846
- It's anyone's race!
388
00:14:51,475 --> 00:14:54,978
- Well, thank you for being
a part of my success today.
389
00:14:54,979 --> 00:14:57,689
- I can't wait to
take credit for you.
390
00:14:57,690 --> 00:14:59,232
Oh, hi, there, Mae Mae.
391
00:14:59,233 --> 00:15:00,525
- Swamp prank.
392
00:15:00,526 --> 00:15:02,652
Oh, shit, Drippy, what
are you doing here?
393
00:15:02,653 --> 00:15:04,279
- Petey here negotiated
the contract,
394
00:15:04,280 --> 00:15:07,157
and Drip Co. Enterprises is
dropping the exclusivity clause
395
00:15:07,158 --> 00:15:08,950
in our contract with New Utopia.
396
00:15:08,951 --> 00:15:10,869
- Um...
397
00:15:10,870 --> 00:15:12,078
no.
398
00:15:12,079 --> 00:15:13,913
No, it can't be!
399
00:15:13,914 --> 00:15:15,582
- It can be.
400
00:15:15,583 --> 00:15:18,293
There's a whole wide world
of ice cream ahead for you,
401
00:15:18,294 --> 00:15:19,586
for everyone.
402
00:15:19,587 --> 00:15:22,297
- Make this make
sense. Swamp prank?
403
00:15:22,298 --> 00:15:24,674
- And, of course, with the
exclusivity clause gone,
404
00:15:24,675 --> 00:15:27,427
that absolutely means that
we'll be pulling our funding
405
00:15:27,428 --> 00:15:29,762
of the alien cruise
ship landing terminal.
406
00:15:29,763 --> 00:15:31,097
- The which one?
407
00:15:31,098 --> 00:15:33,016
- The huge complex
your father designed
408
00:15:33,017 --> 00:15:35,226
that we've been financing in
exchange for exclusive rights.
409
00:15:35,227 --> 00:15:36,769
Mae Mae handles the specifics.
410
00:15:36,770 --> 00:15:38,897
It houses the Dad
& Space Museum,
411
00:15:38,898 --> 00:15:40,315
some sort of cryogenics thing,
412
00:15:40,316 --> 00:15:41,983
and all your father's
pet projects.
413
00:15:41,984 --> 00:15:43,818
- Don, surely you
can reconsider.
414
00:15:43,819 --> 00:15:46,362
- Honestly, this
exceptional young woman
415
00:15:46,363 --> 00:15:48,239
made me think of my life
in a different light.
416
00:15:48,240 --> 00:15:52,744
And she's right... it just might
be time to focus on ice cream.
417
00:15:54,205 --> 00:15:56,247
- Don Drippy, how dare
you think of things
418
00:15:56,248 --> 00:15:57,540
in a different light?
419
00:15:57,541 --> 00:16:00,084
Sugar beach! What did you do?
420
00:16:00,085 --> 00:16:02,587
- Who's mad?
Don't answer that.
421
00:16:09,678 --> 00:16:10,803
- I'm gonna lose.
422
00:16:10,804 --> 00:16:12,513
I'm gonna lose to that dog.
423
00:16:12,514 --> 00:16:14,432
- Oh, come on, Bandit.
424
00:16:14,433 --> 00:16:16,392
You didn't really
want to be mayor.
425
00:16:16,393 --> 00:16:17,977
You're just a troublemaker.
426
00:16:17,978 --> 00:16:20,772
I know you.
- Yeah, I guess you're right.
427
00:16:20,773 --> 00:16:22,941
The election results are in!
428
00:16:24,485 --> 00:16:26,736
- Why is the mayor
shaking my paw?
429
00:16:26,737 --> 00:16:28,404
He's conceding.
430
00:16:28,405 --> 00:16:30,365
Bandee, you won.
431
00:16:30,366 --> 00:16:32,742
- I won?
- By one vote.
432
00:16:32,743 --> 00:16:34,577
Turnout was low.
433
00:16:34,578 --> 00:16:38,122
- Well, everyone's been pretty
distracted by their own things!
434
00:16:38,123 --> 00:16:40,124
- This is gonna
be bad for Petey.
435
00:16:40,125 --> 00:16:41,751
I can't wait to tell her!
436
00:16:41,752 --> 00:16:44,796
- But, Mr. Mayor, we've been
suppressing our urges all day.
437
00:16:44,797 --> 00:16:47,590
You won. Let's celebrate
by banging it out.
438
00:16:47,591 --> 00:16:50,385
Oh, no.
439
00:16:50,386 --> 00:16:53,054
Polly, I'm not horny for you.
440
00:16:53,055 --> 00:16:55,390
- ? I'll never... ?
441
00:16:55,391 --> 00:16:56,849
- Cool! Sounds good, babe.
442
00:16:56,850 --> 00:16:58,101
Big day for you.
443
00:16:58,102 --> 00:16:59,435
I'll sleep on the couch tonight.
444
00:16:59,436 --> 00:17:00,812
It's easy. My pillow's
already there.
445
00:17:08,904 --> 00:17:11,072
What did we do?
446
00:17:11,073 --> 00:17:12,490
- Action.
447
00:17:12,491 --> 00:17:15,201
- Hi, I'm Eliza, and
welcome to my audition
448
00:17:15,202 --> 00:17:17,954
for "Diners,
Drive-ins and Dives."
449
00:17:17,955 --> 00:17:19,205
Hi, sharks.
450
00:17:19,206 --> 00:17:22,000
Is that how I think
all pitches start?
451
00:17:22,001 --> 00:17:24,669
I know you like
some nasty bar food,
452
00:17:24,670 --> 00:17:26,921
and I have some, and I
want to show it to you.
453
00:17:26,922 --> 00:17:28,589
Look at 'em. Look at
these onion rings.
454
00:17:28,590 --> 00:17:30,216
Pick my onion ring.
455
00:17:30,217 --> 00:17:31,676
Pick me for the show.
456
00:17:31,677 --> 00:17:35,221
I want everyone to
look at me and like me.
457
00:17:35,222 --> 00:17:38,600
Oh, I am not happy.
458
00:17:38,601 --> 00:17:40,893
I am not happy in this town.
459
00:17:40,894 --> 00:17:43,146
I've been lying to myself.
460
00:17:43,147 --> 00:17:45,189
I should've left when
I had the chance.
461
00:17:45,190 --> 00:17:47,650
Oh, no. Oh, no.
462
00:17:47,651 --> 00:17:49,027
I mean, did you ever think...
463
00:17:49,028 --> 00:17:50,528
If you combine
ketchup and mustard,
464
00:17:50,529 --> 00:17:51,821
it's called
"kustard."
465
00:17:51,822 --> 00:17:53,615
I invented it.
466
00:17:54,825 --> 00:17:57,076
- The gas shows what's inside.
467
00:17:57,077 --> 00:17:59,912
- I was just high. I told
you, it's not my drug.
468
00:18:01,457 --> 00:18:04,250
- I'm gonna find a burger.
469
00:18:06,629 --> 00:18:08,921
- What's going on here?
- Nothing going on.
470
00:18:08,922 --> 00:18:10,632
- Look, I know
you're embarrassed
471
00:18:10,633 --> 00:18:12,508
that you wanted to play
big-lady business boss
472
00:18:12,509 --> 00:18:13,926
and ended up jeopardizing
473
00:18:13,927 --> 00:18:15,803
everything your father
and I worked for.
474
00:18:15,804 --> 00:18:18,306
It's okay. Don can cool off.
475
00:18:18,307 --> 00:18:20,892
When he's thinking clearly,
I'll invite him back,
476
00:18:20,893 --> 00:18:24,103
wine and dine him, and get your
father's amazing space terminal
477
00:18:24,104 --> 00:18:26,481
ready for the benevolent
aliens to arrive
478
00:18:26,482 --> 00:18:28,608
and bring us to
salvation via comet,
479
00:18:28,609 --> 00:18:30,693
which is what they use for ship.
480
00:18:30,694 --> 00:18:33,488
- Right, so about that,
I guess I'm just not 100%
481
00:18:33,489 --> 00:18:35,782
on, like, any of
what you just said.
482
00:18:35,783 --> 00:18:37,658
- But the people are
counting on the comet,
483
00:18:37,659 --> 00:18:39,619
and the comet is
counting on the terminal.
484
00:18:39,620 --> 00:18:40,995
Let me help you.
485
00:18:40,996 --> 00:18:43,831
So you screwed up
on gas. Who hasn't?
486
00:18:43,832 --> 00:18:45,208
- I hasn't!
487
00:18:45,209 --> 00:18:46,668
I won the election.
488
00:18:46,669 --> 00:18:49,045
It was only by one
vote, but that's enough.
489
00:18:49,046 --> 00:18:50,963
You and I are
officially at odds.
490
00:18:52,424 --> 00:18:54,676
- My anti-Petey platform
really spoke to people.
491
00:18:54,677 --> 00:18:56,010
Well, a person.
492
00:18:56,011 --> 00:18:57,303
- You won by one vote?
493
00:18:57,304 --> 00:18:59,847
Oh, no, my final prank.
494
00:18:59,848 --> 00:19:01,015
- What's that, Mama?
495
00:19:01,016 --> 00:19:03,184
- I voted for my son!
496
00:19:03,185 --> 00:19:04,811
He'd be terrible!
497
00:19:04,812 --> 00:19:06,604
Swamp prank!
498
00:19:06,605 --> 00:19:09,565
- Well, congratulations,
Mayor Bandit.
499
00:19:09,566 --> 00:19:11,150
I'm looking forward
500
00:19:11,151 --> 00:19:13,653
to watching you be completely
ineffective as a leader
501
00:19:13,654 --> 00:19:15,488
and then go back to
being a barn farmer.
502
00:19:15,489 --> 00:19:17,740
Now, can you
rooter-skedaddy whatever?
503
00:19:17,741 --> 00:19:20,785
- My first mayoral decree...
No more flirt-fighting.
504
00:19:20,786 --> 00:19:22,245
We're officially at odds now.
505
00:19:22,246 --> 00:19:23,663
Now, what about your thing?
506
00:19:23,664 --> 00:19:25,957
Tell Mayor Bandit about
your spectacular failure.
507
00:19:25,958 --> 00:19:27,333
- I got what I wanted, too.
508
00:19:27,334 --> 00:19:29,502
- She's on gas.
Don't listen to her.
509
00:19:29,503 --> 00:19:31,754
- No, I was on gas.
510
00:19:31,755 --> 00:19:34,465
But even then, I
got what I wanted.
511
00:19:34,466 --> 00:19:36,467
I guess I didn't know
how to tell you this.
512
00:19:36,468 --> 00:19:38,720
I do think the right
thing is more ice cream,
513
00:19:38,721 --> 00:19:40,138
and that's more important
514
00:19:40,139 --> 00:19:42,640
than an alien cruise
ship landing terminal.
515
00:19:42,641 --> 00:19:46,144
- I'm anti-cult, but that
sounds anti-cult, too.
516
00:19:46,145 --> 00:19:48,229
Are you telling me we're
on the same side here?
517
00:19:48,230 --> 00:19:50,523
- In this particular instance.
518
00:19:50,524 --> 00:19:52,275
- Dang it, I don't know
how to process this!
519
00:19:54,236 --> 00:19:56,279
- I feel great that I told
you what I really want.
520
00:19:56,280 --> 00:19:57,697
Don't you feel great, too?
521
00:19:57,698 --> 00:19:59,866
It's like a huge
weight has been lifted.
522
00:19:59,867 --> 00:20:03,077
I'm gonna go scout some
new ice cream options.
523
00:20:03,078 --> 00:20:05,329
It's all happening!
524
00:20:05,330 --> 00:20:07,458
- There's a schism
in the church.
525
00:20:09,710 --> 00:20:11,419
- I didn't see you
much this time.
526
00:20:11,420 --> 00:20:14,338
- I had business to attend
to. It was nothing personal.
527
00:20:14,339 --> 00:20:18,301
- It seems like everyone was
having fun today except me.
528
00:20:18,302 --> 00:20:20,470
That makes me a little sad.
529
00:20:20,471 --> 00:20:22,972
I always thought I was
the glue of my group.
530
00:20:22,973 --> 00:20:26,851
They didn't even care
that I had to work.
531
00:20:26,852 --> 00:20:30,021
- You can't rely on other
people for your happiness.
532
00:20:30,022 --> 00:20:33,191
- You're so right. Gosh,
it feels good to talk.
533
00:20:33,192 --> 00:20:35,693
I really think what's
between us... it's real.
534
00:20:35,694 --> 00:20:37,028
- Shh.
535
00:20:37,029 --> 00:20:38,947
Baby, you know I
belong to the swamp.
536
00:20:47,873 --> 00:20:49,790
- Oh, no.
537
00:20:49,791 --> 00:20:52,085
I that guy.
538
00:20:52,135 --> 00:20:56,685
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