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I-I kinda want to get going.

You rolling?
All right, man,

this is exciting.
We're starting production

on "From War to Wisdom."
Day one, shoot one.

Josh, please state for
the record your full name.

Joshua R. Hisle.

Place of birth. Cincinnati, Ohio.

Underwear size.Large.

All right, man.

Are we live? We are live.

Dude...

could you match my...
My lackadaisical carefreeness?

Sir, yes, sir. What's goin' on?

Be the one, Dan.

Pretty doggone... all righty.

First question...

So, from what I hear,
it's just like "Call of Duty."

No, um...

tell me a little bit
about when you deployed.

Tell me a little bit about
where you're from,

where you grew up.

Yeah, where you from?

I guess I'm supposed to
say something, huh?

Fuck.

What were you fighting for?

What did we fight for?

That's a good question.

I don't have that answer.

And, dude,
if I'm going down paths

that make you uncomfortable
or that...

I won't say anything
I don't want to say.

Though, can you not
put that in either, dude? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You know what I'm saying? Sure, sure.

I've told this story
hundreds of times,

but it's different every time

I tell it, I swear. That's good.

I... dude, I'm here, I'm...
I'm enjoying it.

I'm having fun right now, man,

so let's... let's
keep it going, man.

I wanted to be a Marine
since I was a kid.

I mean, I always did.

I have papers and stuff
from, like, fifth grade

where I'm writing about
being a Marine.

Yeah, my grandfather,
Walter K. Hisle,

was a Marine, um, in Korea.

Korean War.
And, uh, I always wanted

to be a Marine ever since
I was a child.

Always look at my papaw's
pictures and stuff,

and he'd tell
war stories, and...

something very romantic
about it, I don't know.

You know, growing up it's...

You see it on TV,
you play these games,

just want to do it, you know?

You don't realize
what it really is.

I was 19.

Yeah, I think
I was 19, 'cause I...

I turned 20, uh, a couple days

before I left for boot camp.

So, I know I was 19
when I swore in and stuff.

When 9/11 happened,

I was at work
when the towers got hit.

And I left work and like, uh,

went and joined the Marines
like right then and there.

It was just an instant decision.

And, honestly, I didn't
give it a lot of thought,

I just did it, you know?

There were... there were
some other guys

down there, too, that were
doing the same thing.

It was kind of a...

This generation of,
uh, guys who were like,

they want to kick
somebody's ass.

I-I don't know who, but...

everybody wanted
some payback, I guess.

I think people who join
the Marine Corps

are a certain breed
of people, man.

I would read books by, like,

the Marines on Peleliu
or, you know,

what they did in Okinawa.

The whole
Pacific campaign, really.

These guys were some
fuckin' hard men,

and inspired me.
I was like...

I wondered if
I could be that hard.

I always wanted to be
something bigger than myself.

I always wanted to...

be the best, and be in the best.

I wanted to be in the Marines.

It's the best branch.
I wanted to be a grunt.

Physical fitness of

the United States Marines
is traditional.

Yet, even the high
bodily standards

of our leathernecks is being
stepped up these days

to meet new demands
of modern warfare.

The only thing I really
knew about the Marines

is they were supposed to
be the toughest,

they were supposed to be
the hardest, you know.

They had commercials
of them slaying dragons.

I want to be the best.

So, part of me went like,
"I'll be a Navy SEAL."

Then I realized that...

I'm not too good of a swimmer.

So, you know, I joined
the Marine Corps.

You know,
the volunteer infantry.

My recruiter was like,
"What do you want to do,

you know,
as an enlisted person?"

I was like,
"Well, obviously, infantry.

I want to, you know,
blow stuff up and kill people."

Why would I join
the Marine Corps

to do other stuff?

Oh, the Marine Corps
is legendary

for being badass, man.

I mean, every major battle
in the history of...

of all of our wars,
uh, they've taken...

they've taken people down, man.

We learned by fire real fast,

even while we were in training.

You know, you're taking
18-year-olds,

and then by the time they're 19,

they're all marathoners
and capable of hiking

large amounts of goods
through mountain passes,

you know, and employ
weapon systems.

You know, there's a big change

in such a small amount of time.

It was just always something

that I knew I was gonna
end up doing

at one point in my life.

Now we're going to war...

hopefully it holds out till
I can get there, right?

That was my train
of thought, dude.

Hopefully, it... it can
hold out till I get there.

The gears of war began turning.

And, so, everything changed.

There was something
palpable in the air.

Everybody knew
that something was coming.

We're going to war.

We didn't know what kind of war.

We didn't know how long
it was gonna last,

we didn't know if
we were even gonna fight it.

You know, we might just
have been flown into Kuwait,

you know, rattled our saber,
and then got to go home.

Nobody knew, but...
we were going.

And we were going now.

Rock and roll.

Hey, quit your lollygagging,

get your stuff, and let's go!

It's 2:00,
still on the plane.

Welcome to Kuwait.

This is as real
as it's gonna get.

In fact, it's worse,
'cause we can't see the enemy.

Good to go?

Yeah.
Yep.

Nobody gets off the bus.

We left in late January

and, uh, arrived
in Kuwait in buses.

They bussed us out
in the middle of the night,

like three, four, five hours

out in the middle of the night,

uh, into the Kuwaiti desert.

We finally roll up, uh,
off of sandy roads

to this one generator just
in the middle of nowhere.

I mean, there was nothing.

And, uh, they...
We get out, and they...

They tell us to unpack,
and we're just...

you know, biv...
Bivouacking here tonight.

And, uh, we all just kind of...

We put up, set up a fire watch,

and we wake up under
like six inches of sand.

A sandstorm comes
in the middle of the night

and buries everybody
while they're sleeping.

Welcome to the fucking suck,
you know what I mean?

And all of a sudden
we can see around us,

you know, it's morning
time and, uh,

there's just nothing
but... sand.

Slowly rolling sand for as...
Well, as far as you can see.

We didn't know where we were at.

They were like,
"We're somewhere in Kuwait."

Does anybody really know
where we are?

You guys know where we are?

Which way is Iraq?

That way.

And it wasn't till later

that after we dug in
the fighting holes

like World War II
all over again,

but thank God
it was sand to dig in.

We realized that we were like
two klicks from the border.

That we were staring

at the Iraqi border
just waiting to go.

And that's where we spent
the first month.

And it... it still
hadn't sank in.

Nothing had happened yet.

You weren't really on edge.

The... it waited us to death.

You know, that'll make somebody
go stir crazy.

It's like,
we're over here for a war

and then they just
parked us over there.

"Hurry up!
Get over there!"

And then they're like,
"All right...

now we're just gonna
sit here." And we...

We had no idea
what we're gonna do

and when we're gonna
be doin' it, by the way.

So... and that
was just...

that would drive a man insane.

Whoa, Blakley, that looks like

a little bit
of heaven there, huh?

Don't even know,
Mike, don't even know.

Where'd you get that from?

First Sergeant hooked me up.

First Sergeant did that? He did.

Woe be to the devil dog
who drops the pot.

Huh?

Seems to be
the most critical piece

of tactical equipment
you have here, First Sergeant.

Yeah, exactly!

Think about it,
you know, you train

to go do something,
you want to do it, right?

So, we're excited.

And we sat in Kuwait
for a couple of months.

Uh, I think it was
a solid two months.

Um, and it got
to the point where

there was a whole lot
of poker, and checkers,

and, uh, really nothing, uh...

you know, gas drills, but noth...

It turned into this, like,

you know, very, uh,
complacent... thing

where we were just
kind of camping out

in the middle of the desert.

Mr. Adouri said
Iraq was committed

to abandoning banned weapons

and accused the United States

of possessing ulterior motives.

I-I think we shouldn't
be out here

unless we're gonna go
across the L.D.

because, I mean,
we're shock troops,

we're not built to be able
to stand here

and just sit here 'cause

that's just not what Marines do.

No, gas masks suck, but...

All clear on deck!

All clear!

What we try to tell the Marines,

what I try to tell
the staff and shields

and the Marines directly is,

it doesn't matter
what our politics,

what's happening politically
or anything.

Only that matters
is what's happening

to our company today.

So, shake it off

and let's get our heads
in the game.

That way, we can all come home.

We're just another chapter
in the long legacy of,

you know, great Marines
doing what they had to do.

And it's our duty to...
Not to drop the flag,

so to speak.
And they understand that.

That's part of being a Marine.

It's... it's taught
since recruit training.

Every unit you go to
has a history,

and they'll always tell ya,

we have to, you know,
keep our legacy strong,

keep our honor clean,
so we can pass it on

to the Marines
that come behind us.

The Marine Corps is built

to fight from
the fireteam level up.

My position as First Sergeant

in this company,
I work on leadership

because, um, if we can
build 'em into strong leaders,

then all those bad decisions,
or less favorable decisions,

will start to just drop off.

They won't exist because
they'll take the time

to think about
their Marines first,

and then they'll make
better decisions.

So, I want to develop

their maturity
as Marine leaders.

Fox 2-5.

We were attached
to Second Tanks,

and, uh, they could bring

cool stuff over in their tanks.

And somebody had a guitar.

There's this motto
in the Marine Corps,

"When we're not killin',
we're chillin'."

So, we sat out and would,
like, write songs

about how hot it was
and how shitty it was.

And we had this little
talent show in the desert.

And, uh, First Sergeant
comes up and tells me,

you know, "You're gonna
do something tonight

to represent Fox."

So I did, and I won
the freaking thing.

Thanks a lot, Fox!
Thanks, everybody else!

And then one night, man,
about 2:00 in the morning,

they just were like freakin',
"Let's go, boys!"

You waited your whole
Marine Corps career.

Some of you, only been a year.

Some of you, it's only
been two years.

Some of you devil dogs,
it's been longer

for this moment right here.

Don't screw it up,
you understand what I'm saying?

You trained so hard
to get to this point,

now it's time to go
do what we need...

What we trained to do.
Check?

Let's go get some.

Let's go!

All of a sudden,
we're invading Iraq.

And we're going
through 'em, you're like,

"Oh, here we are.
We're here."

And, of course,
we're expecting...

D-Day, you know what I mean?

Just, bullets.

And as we went up the country

there through the south,
it was just white flags.

That was it.
I mean...

there were whole units
surrendering.

Wasn't until around
the Fertile Crescent

when we got out of the desert

and into some foliage,
we got attacked,

you know, by Republican Guard.

Saddam's good, you know, elite.

They weren't very elite.

I mean, we trashed 'em
pretty quick.

Pop, pop!

Boom!

You know, we'd get hit
by somebody,

we'd buckle down and...
And, you know,

our Cobra helicopters
would just fuckin'

cut 'em to pieces
and we'd move on.

Um, but, you know,
April 4th, the...

that was... that was
the day it all got real.

Mornin', Frank, how you doing?

Pretty good, pretty good.

Getting cleaned up
for the big town?

I can't wait.

The big day is coming.
Here it comes.

I want... I want to get
this stuff over with.

This is our last step,
Baghdad, so...

there ain't much to go
from there.

This is a long trip,

but I'll tell you what,
it's, uh...

It'll be worth it
when we get up there.

Think it's gonna
be easy or tough today?

Can't say.

Wish I knew.Yeah.

Even the Magic 8-Ball
doesn't know.

Even the Magic 8-Ball
doesn't know, that's true.

Yesterday was a little wild,
wasn't it?

I had a little bit
of fun yesterday.

Yeah. But at the end
of the day,

it's always good to know
that you're the good guy.

Yeah.So...

as long as I can
go home with that,

I'll be a happy man.

Let's go, get it loaded!

Get out!
Hey!

Get the fuck outta the way!

The fuck outta the way!

Get the fuck...

Boom! Get out!

Get the fuck outta the way!

Go, go, go, go, go!

Recon by fire.
Recon by fire, gentlemen.

Within minutes of leaving
our lines,

we were hit again.

For the third straight day,
we're taking contact

from main Iraqi brigade...

stationed on the main road
leading into Baghdad.

We only have 32 miles to go
to get to Baghdad,

and it looks like we're gonna
be fighting all the way up.

We were driving down the road

and we got hit by this,
like, couple...

Piss-shootin' couple of guys.

And we all got out,
and we're tryin' to find 'em.

It was three dudes and, uh,

I was a designated
marksman at the time.

So, I lay down and I find
this guy running,

and I pop a shot off
and I hit him.

And he fell down.

And he, you know, crawls
in the doorway, whatever.

I thought I missed him.
I really thought I missed him.

I thought he just,
you know, dropped.

And I find out, you know,
a couple hours later

the snipers went out and said,

"You got that
son of a bitch."

And I remember I was like...

stoked, but at
the same time, it was like,

"Damn, man, I fuckin'
just killed somebody,"

you know what I mean?
I just killed this guy.

And I-I don't know him,
I don't know

what he looked like,
how old he was, you know.

Maybe he had liver cancer

and I put him out of his misery,

but doubtful, you know?

I killed a fuckin' kid,
you know?

Just like me.

So, whatever,
we move on, and, uh...

there's not really time
to process that shit.

You go,
"All right, cool."

Good job, good job.

If you need...
You need firing support,

you need firing support,
window, aperture, opening...

One, recon by fire.

We move on,
we got ambushed hard.

And, uh, First Sergeant
Smith got killed.

And that was all of our hero.

I mean, this guy was...
He made us what we were.

He got us ready for this fight.

And to see him get killed, uh,

this invincible force,
was fucked up.

I don't know what's going on.

You know, I'm just
getting through the day.

You know, fuckin'...
shooting at, you know,

anything that pretty much
moved, half the time.

When...
when he got hit,

I mean, it...
rocked my world?

For... like, it hurt, you know.

You hear the radio call,
you know, "Fox 8 hit."

Fox 8 is hit.

And like all I could say
was just, you know, "Fuck!"

And I'm sittin'
in the Humvee, and I...

I look in the side mirror...

and I see them carrying
his body on the stretcher.

And they're taking him
to the helo.

The helicopter's
blowing everybody.

All the wind and dust around,

and it was kind of
a sandstormy kinda day.

And there was still smoke

and stuff from invasion,
fires and, you know,

things burning around us.

BMPs, the smell
of flesh in the air.

That was tough to see.

Okay, I didn't know
who it was at first.

And then, especially
when I looked back.

For... for a man that was
a mentor to me.

And just, I mean,
an amazing Marine.

And the last time I ever
got to see him

was in the side mirror
of a Hummer, on a stretcher.

There is no grieving
time, you know.

We had to keep going.
We had a job to do.

And ultimately,
at the end of the day,

I think our First Sergeant
would have been proud of us.

'Cause we had to
push on after that.

The war... became real.

That was it, man.
Everyone was like, sh...

And, all... you saw it.

No one was smiling.
Nobody was dicking around.

And everybody got very,
very serious,

and very, very old very quickly.

For me, it ended up being...

Becoming over the course
of the weeks and months,

it became like
a symbolic thing for me.

Our... our figurehead, you know,

the top of the pyramid
was knocked off.

But, you know, everybody just...

Like nothing happened,

just filled right in
and just took over

and it just kept running
like the machine that it is.

I mean, it's... the closest thing

I can akin it to is,
uh, like the phalanx

in ancient Sparta, when they...

They moved as one unit,
and no matter what happened,

everybody knew everybody's job,

up and down
the chain of command.

Let's go,
God damn it! I can see 'em!

Ed, the treads, look at me.

You know, if it ended up
being a private

in charge of the...
The entire group,

he knew the job.
And that...

That's what made it
so special for, uh,

for me, personally,
and for the Marine Corps

as a brotherhood in general.

And the armed forces in general.

I just will never
forget that day.

I mean, because
the events that evening

piled on and piled on
and piled on.

And it seems like
once that domino fell...

it didn't stop,
and we just got shit on

for the next, you know,
two months until...

until, you know,
they surrendered completely.

But, uh, it's...
It's funny because,

in relation to...
the romance of being

a kid and wanting to go to war.

And, you know, you... you thi...

I mean, you really want to go.

You think you know what
you're talkin' about.

But until it happens,
man, you don't...

You don't know.
And when it does happen,

it's like...
pshew.

"Jesus fuckin' Christ, man.
I shouldn't have done this.

This isn't for me."
You know?

But that's, you know...
But it's not...

That's not the scariest part.
The scariest part is when

that feeling goes away
and you start to like it.

The next thing we know,
we're in Baghdad.

And that's like...

Never thought in my life
I'd be sittin' in Baghdad.

And, you know, we...
Obviously, we met resistance.

But, I mean, nothing stopped us.

We were there for 'em.

They waved at us.
They chased us.

They were... they loved us.

I mean, we literally

set 'em free, you know?

We went in with the mentality
of... hearts and minds.

Uh, no better friend,
no worse enemy.

And we... we truly
embodied that, I feel like.

You know, we said,
we are here, you know,

we're not here
to impress you, like...

we're just gonna keep
ourselves safe

and other than that, like,

if you want to, you know,
work with us,

we will help schools,

we'll help your children,
we'll help you get food,

we'll help you get water.

You know, we will do anything
and everything

we can to help you.

But, if you... if you
come against us,

if you cross us...

the iron fist comes down.

And there is no half measure.

We will obliterate you.

Marines don't fight
for an administration,

or a country, or a flag.

Marines fight for Marines.

And that's why
we're so successful.

We believed in each other.

Everybody had each other's back.

It was a new experience
for everybody involved,

but we knew that
if we were there together,

we would conquer it,

because nothing
could conquer us.

So you get out.

And you go back home.

And that support structure
is gone.

The support structure
of your friends, your brothers.

All of a sudden, it's just gone.

And because we were...

I think we were
the first ones over there...

We didn't realize
that things would...

that things would be different.

It's like, you walk
into civilian society,

and you just don't
get it anymore.

It just... like,
just does not compute.

What are these people...

like, would they give
a shit about something?

And it's like,
just a little while ago,

like, if I was alive
at the end of the day,

I wasn't bleedin',
and if none of my bud...

That happened to none
of my buddies,

that was a good day.

And if there was food?
Psh. Plus one, you know.

If there was an oper...
A working fan...

uh, I mean, you're... you're set.

You're living
the life of luxury.

Your general American...
the general civilian,

never had to make a sacrifice

for what went on over there.

I'll never fault a man
and I'll never weep for a man

who died doing
what he chose to do.

If you're doing what you love

and you died doing it,

then God bless you
and a-fuckin'-men,

you know what I mean?
It's...

Isn't that the way
you want to go out?

My biggest issue that I found

was handling
Marines that survived.

When I first got back
from Iraq, you know,

I expected to be
different, you know.

I-I expected if you go, uh,

into a combat zone,
into such a high-stress,

high, you know, adrenaline

every day type environment,

um, that when I came home,
it was gonna take awhile

to kind of readjust back
to relative safety.

And, uh... you know,
I thought maybe,

hey, six months,
a year after getting home,

maybe then I'll start
to be more like the old me.

And, uh, you know,
it took a few years

to really realize that that's...

not gonna happen.

It was like, "What did
I do over there?

Why did I do this?"
you know.

And you try to regurgitate
this information

to your loved ones,
and that's where

it all kind of went downhill.

Um, your family
and your friends,

as much as they love you,

they just don't understand,
you know?

If I had a chance,
would I do it again?

I would do it all over again...

to be able to be there
for... my brothers.

Would I be there for...

political reasons and bullshit,

and the lies that we were told?

No, I wouldn't be there.

But would I be there for Josh...

for Langley, for First Sergeant?

Yes.
Heartbeat.

After the first tour, I got home

and got married right away.

Um, we'd been planning it

through letters
throughout the war.

Um, I mean, I threw on
my dress blues,

got married a couple of days
after I got home.

And then when we found out
we had to do a second tour

in Ramadi, um, to...

kick these guys
back outta there,

you know,
we'd lost control of it

and gotten all fucked up again.

Um, I had a son at this point.

When we got the call to leave,

it was down to...

Down to the wire
on the birth date.

Like, I-I was deployed
two weeks after he...

My son, Holland, was born.

Throughout the pregnancy,
prior to his birth,

I was training new Marines,

kids who...
just gotten out of...

infantry school, you know,
just like I was

a year and a half before that.

And, uh, that was...
That was hard,

because I'm looking
at these guys

and I know that I was
the same idiot that they were.

Um, didn't know anything,
you know,

about war or about anything.

And I'm thinking to myself like,

"I'm training these guys,

you know, half of 'em
are gonna fuckin' die."

You know, and I'm watching
the news, and you...

You saw what was going on
in Fallujah and Ramadi.

It's like, you know
what you're dropping into.

And you try to tell 'em that,

and you try to train 'em
for that, but...

it's a tiny city.

So, you're not gonna,
like, avoid shit.

Like, you're going to Ramadi,
you're going to Ramadi.

The company I went to was, uh...

called "The Blackhearts"...
That was our nickname.

In boot camp, you learn general

Marine Corps knowledge, right?

And you hear, okay,
2nd Battalion, 5th Marines

is the most decorated unit
in the Marine Corps.

All right?
So, I find out

that I'm going to the 2/5,

and I'm stoked, dude, you know?

There was a legacy.
These dudes, uh,

had just got back
from the invasion,

so these guys had all
been in the fight.

And we're just these young
infantry Marines

who are like, "This is what
we signed up to do."

So, these guys were
like our heroes, right?

And, uh, being Blackhearts,
they...

they instilled...
an ethos, almost, into us.

And they made us
earn that title.

And I think that's
why we functioned

so well when we finally
got into Ramadi,

because we had this identity
as Blackhearts.

And that's who
we had to live up to.

Let's go. Let's go.

Where is go?
Where is go, please?

Please, I have...
please!

Why?

Why husband, why?

When we left
the first tour in Iraq,

we were... we were...
It was parades.

It was people thanking us.

And we were all
throwing up peace signs

and, you know,
this thing was over.

And the people
were kissing us and shit,

like, you know, liberators.

When we got there to Ramadi,

the combat outpost
and the guys we relieved,

they'd been getting
their asses kicked

for about, you know, six months.

They didn't even
have advice for us.

They just were like,
"Get me outta here."

So, we went on a couple
patrols and, uh...

and I don't know
if they hated us

or if they were just
scared shitless, but, uh...

it wasn't like when I left
Iraq the first time.

When I left the first time,
it was like, you know,

you were getting hugs
and kisses.

Uh, this time it was very...

We'd walk down the road,
everybody went in the house,

you know, locked down.

And we'd get hit.
You know, we'd get ambushed.

And that's just how it was.

When we were over there,

it's like, just because this...

city is quiet right now
doesn't mean anything.

This city will pop off
in a heartbeat, man.

In a fuckin' heartbeat.
It just...

turns like that.

And if feels like
the whole city's
on top of you.

Whoa!
How 'bout that shit?

Whoa!

Holy shit!

Duck down, man.

Holy shit!

That is the motherfuckin'
window that saved my life.

Fuck, man, we were...
we...

I don't... I don't even
know how to explain it,

'cause I don't want to use
too strong of words,

but we were...
we were...

we just fucked people up.

I mean, it just was crazy.

We had license to pretty much...

to do whatever you want.

Take cover!

It's on, motherfucker!
Whoo-hoo-hoo!

Marines are killers, man.
That's what we are.

We create hellfire,
that's what we do.

That's probably the biggest
mistake we made is, uh...

sending, you know,

100,000 Marines to...
to police Iraq.

You don't send killers
to keep the peace, man.

You don't.

I'll never forget gettin' hit,

and they told us...

"We've got two different
rooms, all right?

"One room is for people
that are gonna live.

"When they're injured,
you bring 'em to that room.

"And the gym...
the gym is expectant.

Gym means you ain't
gonna make it."

And the first night that
we brought guys back

into the expectant room...

the screams from that room...

that's when reality sets in.

You know, that guy's
not gonna pull through.

That was the same guy
that the night before,

I was up on a turret with,
you know what I mean?

And, I mean, where is he
gonna be tomorrow?

You know.
And...

that's really the "firt" death...

The first death is when
it really sinks in.

My thoughts out here
really are just,

"This is my job.
This is what I do."

If I died, uh...

it's simple as that, you know.

I basically told everyone
back home,

"Until I come back home,
just consider me dead."

You know, this way...

You know, and that's how
I operate out here.

I keep going.
Take a route and...

Yeah, I went to the ground.

Pulled me back, looked
at myself real quick,

make sure I wasn't bleeding,
kept going.

And that's what you gotta do,
you gotta keep pressing,

not only for yourself,
but for the platoon,

for the company,
to finish the mission.

So, out here...

you hear the things
whizzing by you,

things are blowing up
around you,

but it's instilled in you

to continue on, to not falter.

It's... It's just
second nature for us.

That pile of dirt...

can almost guarantee you
that was an IED.

We've been driving down
these little back roads...

you've got all these
different alleys.

Any time, an RPG gunner
could pop out and just...

just hit us with one.

This is the ghetto OP here.

Let's go.

Hey, I've been trying
to get a Frisbee

for fuckin'...
since we been here.

Well, I'll tell you what,
when we left the first time,

I never thought
I'd be coming back.

And, uh, when we left,
it was pretty peaceful.

And we came back, it was crazy.

So...
I don't know.

I'm actually having a ball.

But it's a little different.

This time,
I left a wife and a kid,

whereas last time I left
a fifth of Jack, you know?

This time, yeah,
I'm definitely watchin'

my own ass a little bit more,

just 'cause I want my kid
to have a dad.

Oh!

I don't know, I'm pretty
psyched to go home

and get out
of the Marine Corps, but...

now we have time
to do things like this,

what we should be doing.

Help these people out.

Boost their morale,
boost their confidence

so they can help us
finish this thing off.

'Cause that's what
it's gonna take,

is the Iraqi people to help us.

The first day back
in the States,

there's signs
all over the highway

coming in through Fallbrook,

"Welcome home, 2/5!
Welcome home, 2/5!"

There'll be somebody's name

or something like that,
you know?

They hold this formation,
we march up there

all super motivated...
Everyone's marching in time,

calling, like, that old

drill instructor cadence,
you know?

In raggedy-ass cammies and shit.

And, uh, people are...
taking pictures of us.

And that's, like, actually
one of, like, the proudest

I've ever felt
my entire life, man.

Coming back
and everyone's, like,

cheering for you and shit,
you know?

Company... dismissed!

What a great day.

But after a couple days
of being home, it's like...

"Well, fuckin' now what?"
You know what I'm saying?

This is my area.

It's not insomnia, it's duty.

That's what I say.

I stay up so that I can watch

the whole complex go to sleep,

and then I can go to sleep.

Sittin' on my porch, man.

It's where I go every night.

You gotta have a spot
you can retreat to.

It's gotta be your spot,
you know, where...

you're kind of
in control, you know?

And most of the guys I talk to,

they have that same shit...
Like, their basement,

or their fuckin' backyard,
or whatever.

Gotta have a place
to decompress, every day.

'Cause at the end of every day,

I'm full to the limit with...

stress and whatever.

You have no fuckin' idea
what it's like to...

not be able to sleep, man.

It wears on you,
and you start to go,

"I'm a burden to my family.

"I'm a burden to myself.
I'm a burden to everybody.

I should just fuckin'
shoot myself."

I don't know, man, the long arm

of the American government, I...

That was me,
that's who I was, man.

I was the fuckin'...

judge, jury, and executioner.

And it... I didn't like it.

I still don't like it.

But I don't regret it.

I feel like there's
a part of myself

over there, you know?

And that's why
I went back my fir...

Like, after my first
combat tour.

When I decided to go back,

I felt I needed to, man.

I still feel that...

whatever it was
I was doing over there,

it's not fuckin' done yet.

I mean, I'm home and I know

I'm not getting shot at anymore,

and no one's, like,
really trying to kill me.

But... I don't think
you can ever really...

I don't know, man.
I don't think

anybody ever really comes home.

Being unarmed bugged
the shit outta me.

Had to have... I had to have
some kind of weapon nearby.

Um... I couldn't sleep.

Falling asleep was this ordeal.

I'd be tired and I'd lay down,

and I'd lay there for two hours.

My mind would
just go and go and go.

The biggest hurt
for me was, you know,

I've ruined people's lives.

I arrested people
that I didn't even know
were terrorists.

You know, I took fathers
away from children.

I took children away
from fathers.

And, not only that, but...

I permanently took children
away from fathers.

You know, I mean,
we pulled the fuckin' trigger.

There's no if, ands,
or buts about it.

You know...
a killer's a killer.

Period.

And so, the first
few years were tough.

You know, I spent
a lot of time drinking.

You know, I got into trouble
with the law, you know.

And, uh... I spent
a little time in jail.

And, for me,
it was basically, um...

you know, coming out of jail
and getting into the V.A.

and realizing
the way I'm doing it,

it's not working, you know?

When I first got back, you know,

I had a lot of rage issues.
I would...

You know, my first apartment
that I had,

there were so many
holes in the walls.

You know, just trashed my car.

I-I punctured the tires
on my own car one time

'cause I was pissed off.

Dented, you know,
the side of it,

broke a window.
Um... I broke my own bones.

Pulled a shotgun
on a neighbor one time.

Spent, you know, almost
a night in the custody

of the Long Beach
Police Department.

Um, I just...
you know, I struggle

with rage in a big way,

and it ruined relationships
for me and...

And strained other
relationships for me,

and put me to a place
where I kind of did

draw off by myself
and get very alone and...

And lost contact with all
but a couple of people.

I've been on 32 different
types of medications.

Anti-psychosis
to heavy narcotics,

tranquilizers, all the way down.

The pill-taking point
was my low.

I mean, you know, that...

That's when I actually
put a bullet...

or a gun in my mouth, you know?

Loaded up a fuckin'...

a Glock right in front
of my wife.

And, you know, told her...

"This is it.

I don't have anything else
to live for."

And...
you know, it's...

it's then that...
After that moment,

the look that I seen
in my wife's eyes,

I've never seen before.

And it's... it was a look of,

you know, of her being scared.

I've never seen her
scared before.

Not... not like that.

And, I'll...
never forget it.

Took that right on
out the mouth and...

I haven't done it since,
you know what I mean?

And from that moment on,
you know,

I realized... I need help.

I didn't want to be defined as,

you know, a Marine
or combat Marine.

But what I realized
after ten years

is that is a part of you,
and it does define you.

And it's something that
for a long, long time,

I tried to put
in the background,

shake off, whatever
you want to call it,

and it was
a real moment, actually,

a real moment of clarity for me.

Um, not too long ago.

About a year ago, speaking
to a Vietnam veteran

who basically said,
"Son, that never goes away.

"That's just the way it is.

You're gonna have to learn
to deal with it.

Daddy, there was...

I got out of the Marines,
uh, Thanksgiving Day of '05.

You're at home, you're safe,
and you're sitting there

with your kid and your wife,
you know, and...

and it was really over.

That's... that's my mommy,
that's you.

I saw the man on his worst day,

and, you know,
I'm glad I did it,

because now I know exactly
what to teach my son.

You know, I know
exactly what to tell him.

And I know exactly
how to treat him when...

You know, when he wants
to go do that crap, you know?

And... And I can
write music about it,

and I can, uh...

I suffered a little bit,
but I can...

I can help a lot
of people, I think.

Towards the middle
of that tour in Ramadi,

I started to really
have an issue

with the way we were...
handling things.

Um... the whole...

the interruption
of people's lives,

I had a huge problem with.

If you tell... start bitching
to your men about it,

then you're just a useless
squad walkin' around.

So, I'd use my guitar
as an outlet...

you know, to...
To bitch and complain

about the way things were going.

And this way,
the boys aren't hearing me,

uh, talk trash about...
About the war.

And about the administration
we were under.

As... As we would get hit
really bad or lose someone,

or someone
would get wounded, um,

all this music became
reflective suddenly.

The funny stuff
ended just immediately.

That's when I became
a songwriter,

right then and there.

I started playing music
with a local band,

uh, just having fun.

And I was getting ready
for a gig in Cincinnati.

And I get the phone call
from Mike Cerre.

And he was a journalist that
was embedded with us in Iraq.

And, uh, he called me and said,

"Hey, you know...

You know
who Neil Young is?"

I'm like, "Yeah.
Yeah, I know who he is."

So, he's like, "I'm doing
this movie for him,

"'CSNY/Déjà Vu.'
And he's, uh,

"he's really into your music
and stuff, man.

"He wants to...
he wants you to come up

"and play with him and stuff.

When he comes
through town."

And I'm like,
"What?"

What's the order? Here's the man.

Oh, hey, Josh. Hey!

How are you? Ah, give it up, big guy.

How are ya?
Good to see ya!

Winner time! Mark, mark, mark!

Yeah, are you feeling good to be

back home for a while and...

Yes!
I'm doing well.

Taking it easy.
Adapting.Good. Great.

Yeah, really.

All right, let's do it.

Ladies and gentlemen,
Neil Young!

The reason we did it
was to shoot

this documentary,
"CSNY/Déjà Vu."

We did Sundance together.

We did a couple other shows
that, you know...

and it's just been
going on ever since.

Jackie, I want
to thank you so much.

And it's a real pleasure
for me to introduce

this friend of mine.

A guy that's in our movie,
uh, "Déjà Vu."

He's a... he's a soldier
that was in Iraq, twice.

He's a songwriter,

and he's here tonight
to play for you.

His name is Josh Hisle,
and he'll be playing

with his accompanist,
Jennifer Wheatley.

So, how about a big hand
for Josh and Jennifer?

Hi, I'm Josh.
This is Jennifer.

Um, wow!

Neil Young.

All right, we're just gonna
get right into it, okay?

And what happened was,

once we started hitting the road

and started sharing this music,

I suddenly became this guy

that all these vets
wanted to talk to.

We'd have all these vets
in the crowd,

and they'd be
talking to us afterwards

about how... we keep 'em...

you know, we're keeping
'em alive, or...

or, uh, you know, they can
listen to our music

and be all right,
and feel all right.

And they can relate
to everything.

So... it just turned into
something real powerful, man.

And then when that happ...
Once that happens, man,

once you decide that...

that you care
about these people,

you're married to it
forever, you know?

Great job, man!
Great!

Thank you. All right.

Beautiful.

After Josh got out

and he started getting,
you know, a little famous

touring with Stills and Nash
and all those guys,

CNN did a piece on... on him,
and he was singing,

I think that song
"Traitor's Death,"

or something like that.

And CNN was doing
this piece about, you know,

just the whole anti-war thing.

And I'm still in, man,
I'm getting ready

to go back again.

And I saw that shit,
and I was like,

"Fucking Hisle, dude."

I'm s... "Fuck that guy, dude.
How could you do that?"

I was so mad at him for
like the longest time, dude.

And then, I like... I came across

some of his other... I think
it was that song "Bail Me Out."

And this is a fucking pretty
righteous song, man, you know?

And especially after
I got out and started

looking at things
more objectively, and you know,

I started, like, "Well, I...
I pretty much agree with him."

My biggest hope is that people
can listen to my music

and see a painted picture
of, "A,"

what you're gonna have to do

if you go over there,
and the things

that you're gonna encounter.

And, "B," what you live with

for the rest of your life
after you do it.

If you can listen to music
or watch a film

and educate yourself,
and know what...

You know these horrors of war
without having to go do it.

That's the mission,
man, that's the mission.

My pleasure, man.

What a perfect night
for Josh Hisle

to be sharing his music with us.

Make welcome and celebrate
the Fourth of July

with Josh Hisle.

2008, I did Sundance with
Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young.

It was really cool.

After that ended, I started
looking for gigs,

came home and was... went on
the road with Mikey Ronstadt.

And we got a call
from Walt Michael,

who runs a music
and arts festival

called Common Ground
on the Hill.

And he hired us in
to tell our story,

and to... to play music
and to teach music.

And it's a great gig.
He's like, "It's a whole week,

and you live
on a college campus,
you get paid, you get fed."

And I get there, and it's just
this incredible community

of people who truly took me in.

And even though I was teaching,
I was learning so much,

making some of the best
friends in my life.

And I started
to heal as a result

of Common Ground on the Hill.

Thanks.

Thank you.
Thanks a lot.

Common Ground on the Hill
was founded in 1994,

and the idea was
to bring together artists

and to foster dialogue
among artists

about day-to-day
boots on the ground issues

for all of us in our society.

At the same time,
we celebrate our arts,

and we believe that
a healthy society

is one that has
its arts happening.

Josh Hisle came to us,
I think four years ago,

and I was immediately
blown away by his songs,

and his ability.

And not only ability, but his...

need to speak freely
and to speak truth.

And I felt like
we needed to hear that,

and I feel that our country
and our world

needs to hear this.

We take the warriors
who, um... who serve us,

who serve our countries,
and we train them,

and they do their work
as requested.

And then, we forget about them.

We honor them.

In this generation,
we're honoring these people.

But I'm not sure
we follow up right,

and I'm not sure that, um,
unless we hear their stories

and allow them to be
okay with their stories,

that we're doing
our jobs as citizens.

We were asked to come back
a second year and a third year.

After a while, I decided
that this was helping me.

This was helping me
psychologically.

I was feeling
worth something again,

I was... you know, I was feeling
like I was contributing again.

I was writing music
that I wasn't just complaining

about my woes anymore,
I was writing music

that was helping me,
it was healing me, my own soul.

And their music
was healing my soul.

I just wanna thank you guys
from the bottom of my heart

for bringing me in here
four years ago

and saving my life.

It changed the game
for me completely.

War changes you, period.

It helps me a lot to hear
what everyone's thinking.

You know what I mean,
it helps me

to know how you guys feel.

So, I just wanted to thank
all of you,

and give yourselves
a huge round of applause.

Go ahead, give it up
for yourselves.

You guys are awesome.

I knew that if this
could help me,

it could help other veterans.

So, naturally, I reached out
to Blackhearts, people I knew,

that I knew,
I'd been in contact,

and I knew were having
a hard time,

or could... I think
could benefit from this.

We formed the Vets Initiative
Common Ground on the Hill

three years ago.

We're bringing veterans...
Scholarshipping veterans

and bringing 'em to
Common Ground on the Hill,

to various places,
Westminster, Maryland,

here in Gettysburg,
as well as Tucson, Arizona.

And the idea is to reintegrate
warriors, returning warriors

back into civilian society
through arts and music,

and... and classroom
programming.

And, you know, we raise money
throughout the year,

uh, just guerilla-style,
to bring these guys in,

and it's been successful
thus far.

Made a left turn and driven
about a mile and a half...

Hisle, he called me
and he told me

about this Common Ground event.

And he told me that...
Started... just kinda told me

something about, "Oh,
there's this, like, festival

"and there's, um... uh, music.

There's, uh...
the trade skills, classes."

I talked to Blakley
for a little bit,

and he explained to me
what... what Common Ground was,

and... I couldn't pass it up.

First time Hans
told me about it,

I... I looked at the video,

and I was like,
"What the fuck is this?"

I mean, it was...
It was a hippie fest, you know?

It was like, it was artists.

Like, "Dude, I don't
play no music.

What the hell
am I gonna do here?"

Obviously, it was a little bit
of culture shock at first.

But since I've been here,
over the last few days,

I think it's imperative
that veterans are here,

so that everybody else
can have a more educated opinion

on what we are doing
when we're in,

what we're doing
when we get out,

and that we're just people, too.

Don't knock it till you try it,
that's really the only...

The only way you can explain it.

Because it's not until
you get here

that you realize that
people still care about you.

Those of you in here
who aren't combat veterans,

you're in here for a reason.

You're in here to understand

that we're in here with you
to understand.

Uh, brought you here
to bridge a gap, you know.

When you come back,
being 23 years old

when I got out of the Army,
all of my friends,

I mean, they're just
getting done finishing up

their bachelor's degree,
and I don't even know

how to conduct myself
like a normal human being...

when I'm being
reintroduced into society.

My friends are like,
"What is wrong with you?

"Why are you driving
110 miles an hour,

dodging bags of trash
blowing across the road?"

And it's incredibly hard
for them to empathize

with what we've been through.

There'll be no shortage
of suicides this year.

There'll be no shortage
of wars in the future.

And just remember
that it's gonna...

There's gonna be a lot
more boys and girls

to take care of
that are coming back.

There were a couple
of other classes

that I thought about taking.

And something just
drew me to this.

I... I guess it's the need
to understand more.

You know, we love to say
"support our troops,"

and, "Oh, I support our vets."

But you know, flag waving
and all that kind of stuff

isn't... that's not
gonna do too much.

I think we have
a real responsibility to...

To do more to get to know them,

and to, uh, to find out
how we can help them.

To get their perspective
just puts everything

in a whole different light,

which I'm gonna
take away for me,

and you know,
remember forever, really.

One of the cool things
about the Veterans Initiative

is the cast, the vets that come.

We got a lot of young Iraq guys

that are really having
a hard time

trying to find
some way up and out.

Then you got Ragtime,
a Vietnam-era Marine.

He's found this level of peace,

and he's like a great mentor
to the younger guys.

And sometimes, just being
in contact with other...

With other warriors,
um... that's all you need,

just to be in touch again,
just to be able to talk

to someone
who speaks your language.

Well, as you can see,

we're making a totem pole
for everybody.

We're hopefully
gonna represent everybody

that came with us
in the initiative.

We got Fox 2/5's insignia.

Old Ragtime, who's an old
former Marine,

he wanted a peace symbol,
so he's been working

on his peace symbol and getting
everybody started in it.

I make music with a file,
they make music with a guitar.

It's all... it's all
the same thing.

Each one is art, it's just art
in a different direction.

It's almost surreal
because it's ten years of time

that have gone by since
I've seen a lot of these people.

You know, it's been a long road,
I guess you could say.

You... you either choose
to reinvent yourself

and change along the way,
or you...

you get stuck in the mire,
and that's those guys

that we're trying to help
and, you know, just show 'em

that it's okay to look forward.

It's okay to not be
the quintessential tough guys.

It's okay to... to not have to
think about it every day.

You know, you're not
doing any of the people

that were left behind
an injustice

by putting their memory away.

'Cause if they were alive,
they'd tell you,

"Why aren't you
living your life?

"Why aren't you keeping going?

Why aren't you
expressing yourself," you know?

So, you can either
let it destroy you,

or you can take it and use it
to heal the world.

And so, that's what
this place is all about,

and I absolutely love it.

When I got back from 'Nam,
I didn't want to be

that person that I was.

I didn't like him very much.

And Ragtime came about as I was
just searching for an identity.

I heard that on a song
by The Band

called "Rockin' Chair."

Not gonna sail
the seven seas anymore.

He's gonna sit on his porch
in his rocker

with his old friend Ragtime.

And... and I heard that name,
and... it's just who I became.

It just was so cool, that I felt
that that's who I was.

Being an artist
was quite a shift.

It seemed very strange that
that was kinda my path,

was gonna be into art
rather than violence,

or killing,
or something like that.

I just thought
my whole past life

hadn't been going towards
art at all.

I avoided it...
with extreme prejudice.

And, um... now, I want
to be an artist,

but I still don't really
think of myself as that.

I'm still just basically a grunt
that does some things well.

Well, this is a piece
I did about 15 years ago,

when, um, I was just starting
to be diagnosed with PTSD.

The head is a mass
of disorganized matter.

And the hair, it swirls
between chaos and order.

The shoulders are crying
deep blue water,

and the neck
is a simmering volcano.

And that's how life was
for a while.

This gold beam
is coming in to try to defuse

the disorganization in there
and bring healing.

I guess that's what
this is gonna try

to put the pieces back together.

It took 30 years till
they started recognizing PTSD.

And so, all those years
in there,

I went through a marriage,
I went through a lot of things,

you know, and it's like,
I didn't know

what was wrong with me.

And when the first night
I got to Common Ground,

it was just like, all these guys

and all this energy
that I hadn't felt

in that mass
for a long, long time.

I loved it.

I feel like
I'm over the hill, man.

But I can still have
a few shots in...

I can help
the younger bucks with.

But they gotta be there, too.

And that's why I want to be
a part of Common Ground,

'cause there's people
actually walking the walk.

I do feel that I have not
lived in vain.

Maybe somewhere down the road,
someone will look at my life

and say, "Well, Ragtime
wasn't drinking the Kool-Aid."

War sucks.

There's never been a good war
or a bad peace.

As far as being a warrior goes,

I'm very proud that I was able
to accomplish that in my life,

and I feel good about that.

But what I did with that
was not good at all.

I don't like what we did
to the Vietnamese people at all.

It's put a hole in my soul
that's still there.

It ain't over yet, and I've...

I've been a grunt for...
Since 1963.

It's okay to be a warrior.

It's strength,
it's not the fight.

You know, feeling more
like a warrior now.

As long as I'm here, I'm...
It's the American Dream.

Right on.

America forgot what
it was supposed to be doing.

But I remember.

So, this is the worst part
right here.

Just, you know, like,
being on the 405 right here

where it kind of merges
with the 101,

and then when it starts to,
you know, go more south

through the Getty Center
and into the Wilshire District.

That territory, that just
kind of...

It really gets me,
'cause right here,

you feel like you're
bottlenecked in,

and like, you know,
there's people over there

that somebody can post if they
really didn't like other people.

It's a tactical advantage
for the enemy.

This place is...
I mean, a lot of casualties

could happen here.

And it's just, you know,
all it takes is one asshole

to go up there and, you know...
make people's lives a hell.

I only did one tour in Iraq.
I invaded, and, uh...

I mean, like, everybody
that was in my fire team

is... is gone now.

They died either coming home
or serving

in Ramadi the second time.

These guys were all guys that
had just extraordinary futures

laid out for them.

Yeah, I mean, in some sense,
I feel like I betrayed them

because I didn't
go back with them.

That guilt just starts
to set in,

and I felt
this urge to still help.

My service was not done.

And I couldn't
let my brothers down.

You just gotta live
your life wholly and fully,

and peacefully, and you gotta
show that that is possible,

and that's how you honor them.

The things I... I really
honed in on

to help me heal
were simple things,

like planting your own
vegetables

and building,
you know, simple things.

Your dog, feeding him.

Daily tasks that are routines
that bring you so much joy.

You know, cooking
and loving food,

and loving
how a community works,

especially the folk scene,
you know,

the folk... the folk communities,

where people are sharing
music and food and stories.

Those things really kind of
give me a sense of purpose

and a sense to move on.

Like Ragtime, he's reached
the farthest stage of healing,

I mean, that you can probably
possibly reach.

He's found his inner peace.

He knows he has to live
with the tragedies in his life,

but he doesn't dwell on 'em.

That is, in my eyes,
it is attainable.

I know it is.

I know it is because I know
I have support

from other veterans.

A lot of guys, they just get out

and they're... they're
really lost, you know?

And there's other things that
need to happen, obviously,

at the local level, to help
veterans heal more holistically.

The work's not done.

This war is gonna keep going on,

and we need to keep
welcoming these guys home

and getting them the services
they need,

and the government
can't do that.

The government
can provide infrastructure,

but it can't... it can't
touch down at a local level,

at a grassroots level,
it just can't.

You need empowered veterans
to empower other veterans

to do these things.

Matt Lorscheider, he was a...
he was a Marine infantryman

from Fox company,
2nd Battalion, 5th Marines.

After that, he went to college,
got his bachelor's,

and followed
by a master's degree,

and... now has decided
to help homeless veterans

with the New Directions program.

So, we're gonna go
pay him a visit right now

and get a little bit of...
of information

on what he has to say about it,
and what he's been doing

since he's been out
of the Marine Corps.

The veteran population
we work with is 100% homeless.

One doesn't become homeless
because they have

excellent job skills,
for the most part.

So, we're addressing
the statistics that, you know,

probably 98% of our population

could use some retraining
in those skills.

There is a correlation
between companies

that have a reputation
for bad customer service

and companies that pay low wages

and give not a lot of hours,
and don't pay benefits,

and those things are connected.

I first came to work here

because I wanted to do something
that'd help my fellow vets.

And it just, like,
it made a big difference to me

when I was working with people
and they were or weren't vets.

You know, I... when I was trying
to talk to somebody

about my situations,
and they weren't a veteran,

no matter how much
they tried to say,

"Oh, well, I work
with veterans all the time,"

or, "Oh, my... you know,
my husband's a vet,"

or, "My cousin's a vet,"
or, "My uncle's a vet,"

it's not the same.

It's not the same as if you
haven't really done it.

It gives me a certain level
of legitimacy when dealing

with combat veterans
and combat arms veterans

that have... that have been
in that kind of stuff,

where I can say, you know what,

you know, I've had people
shooting at me, too.

You know, I've...
I've shot people.

I know what that's about.

There's kind of a trend
going on right now,

and it's been going on
for a few years,

where guys are getting
kicked out of the military.

You know, they basically
act out with rage

related to PTSD, or they start
using drugs to self-medicate,

or they start using
alcohol to self-medicate.

And when they get
kicked out on OTHs...

On Other Than Honorable
discharges,

they lose their entitlement
to VA healthcare,

including healthcare
and mental healthcare

for the very conditions
that got them kicked out,

conditions that were started
because they served in combat.

That's absolutely
criminal to me,

because they're putting
a whole generation of veterans

directly into the streets
by doing that.

It needs to stop right away.

And you can print that,
you can tell that to Congress,

you could tell that to Obama,
whoever's in charge.

Like, that needs
to stop yesterday.

No matter where
my career takes me,

you know, I know it's gonna be
doing something

that benefits veterans
and society, you know.

I... my desire to serve
my country and all that

didn't end the day I,
you know, got my DD 214.

My purpose
is I wanna help people,

and I'm starting with people
like me, other veterans.

You know, veterans that...
That maybe didn't take advantage

of their opportunities
the way I did,

or you know, guys who are just
struggling and need a hand.

That's what we did in
the military, that's what we did

in the Marine Corps, you know,
you helped a buddy out.

I'm not gonna stop
doing that now.

You know, once a Marine,
always a Marine.

That's what
it's all about for me.

It gives me a great deal
of hope to see

Marines I served with,
Marines I didn't serve with,

warriors from all
different branches,

starting these small
organizations

to help one another.

That's the potential here,
and that's what's happening.

As we empower each other
as veterans,

and then we start bridging
the gap with civilians again,

and all these people
are empowered,

and they all
are so happy to help,

and they're so willing to work,

it's like, it just spreads
like wildfire.

Although we all
have our issues...

And make no mistake,
going to combat,

you don't come home the same...

But to see 'em going forward
in spite of that

gives me immense hope,
and for the sake of hope,

we have to keep doing this.

We had did the run, you know,

the couple hundred mile
running gun fight to Baghdad.

And then after
we secured Baghdad,

I guess the forces...
The US forces

kinda spread out
across the country.

My unit, we were tasked
in the Babylon province.

So, we were down by, you know,
the ruins of Babylon.

And of course,
while we were there,

we would do a lot
of counterambush patrols.

We'd go out in the city
and basically, you know,

try and elicit a response,

you know, from the...
From the enemy fighters

that, you know, were in the...

That were out there
kinda waiting.

And we were headed out of
the city on one of the routes,

and they had 500
20-millimeter tank rounds

daisy-chained together
and wired to a car battery

laying off the road.

And so, the... the Iraqi Reform
fighter or whoever it was,

you know, waited until we,
you know, rolled up on the IED,

and then set if off when
it was right next to our tire.

That was the first IED attack
for our unit

of the entire war.

Luckily, they weren't
very good at it then.

You know, nobody was
seriously injured.

But it was... it was
mainly the blast wave.

You know, as that blast
passes through your brain,

you know, it... it could
do some serious damage,

you know, long-term damage.

And at the time,
you know, in '03,

they didn't understand
blast wave injuries,

you know, traumatic brain injury
as well as they do now.

Had that happened today,
you know,

I'd spend the next 30 days
in a dark room, you know,

resting the brain
and giving it time to heal.

But back then, you know,
I wasn't missing any limbs,

you know what I mean,
and the next day,

we're out on patrol
doing it again.

When we got out
of the Marine Corps,

Kenny and I stayed in touch.

He was someone who I always held
as a... as a close friend.

And it was very difficult,
because I knew him before Iraq.

So, I knew
the happy-go-lucky kid,

the guy that was just overall
an up-spirit type of person.

And so, when we came back,
you know, it was pretty obvious

that he was struggling
and having some problems.

About ten years after
getting back from Iraq

and going through the VA,
you know, going through

the process of being treated
for posttraumatic stress,

my doc had prescribed
a service dog.

He said, you know,
"I think a service dog

"would be the next best
stage treatment for you

in your posttraumatic stress."

And so, you know, I started
going through the process

of trying to find
an organization to work with.

The VA doesn't provide them
or pay for 'em,

so you know, basically,
I was on my own,

just like any other vet,
you know, that's gonna be trying

to figure out where to get
a service dog.

My best option turned out
to be going with an organization

that wasn't a nonprofit
that actually charged me

$15,000 for Atlas.

And you know, being a disabled
Marine on disability,

you know, and having that...
That fixed income, you know,

I understand that most
other vets in my position,

you know, they're just not
gonna be able to afford that.

I called him, I'm like, what's...
What are you talking about?

You know, why does a dog
cost $15,000?

I knew he was
service connected 100%,

so I said, "Why isn't the VA
paying for this,

you know, and what
is this all about?"

So, during that
initial conversation

when he's explaining to me
how this dog is helping him

and what the dog can do for him,

it was a pretty significant
moment in my life

that I remember,
because I knew that

that was going to be
a fantastic opportunity

to help other veterans.

I was trained to, you know,
turn it on.

I was trained
to turn on that kill switch.

I was... I was trained to...
thrive in combat and survive.

But the problem comes back,
is when we come back stateside,

you know, and we take
that uniform off

and we, you know,
take the weapons to the armory,

and you go back to your house,

you know, and you go back
to your wife,

and you go back
to that civilian setting.

We're not trained
to turn it off.

We're not trained to turn off
that hyper-vigilance,

those survival instincts
that we have,

that were reinforced and honed

depending on how long
you were there and how close,

you know, you came to dying
while you were there.

My Battle Buddy,
I'll take him to the mall.

You know, I take him out
to these public places,

you know, all the places that
I spent years avoiding.

And so, over time, it's...
It essentially has become

that retraining,
you know, allowing me to...

I guess basically
reintegrate myself

back into that civilian world.

Atlas has definitely been
a life-changer for me.

He's got different tasks
that he's trained to do,

and he's trained to wake me
from nightmares.

So, you know, if at 3 a.m.,
you know, I'm sweating

and you know, cussing in Arabic,

he'll jump up on the bed,
you know, and either lay on me

or lick my face and wake me up.

You know, there's different
things he can do,

where he'll post, you know,
turn around and face behind me

so I'm not hyper-vigilant,
or I don't have to be,

you know, as on alert as,
you know, I had been for years.

You know, there's all sorts of
things that they can be trained

to do that...
That really just help

increase that quality of life
on a daily basis,

help mitigate, you know,
some of those symptoms

that would keep you
from doing things.

I'd actually been looking for
a charity to get involved with.

And I came back to him
and I said, "Hey,

"what do you think about,
you know, starting a charity,

"you know, together,
the two of us,

and helping other vets do this?"

And you know, he said,
"There's nothing I'd rather do."

And... and that was it.

And his brother John
came on board,

and the idea was... was born.

You know, there's a need
in that veteran community.

There's a great need.

And when I looked for that help,
it wasn't there.

I sincerely believe that we're
gonna be one of the biggest

organizations that there
ever were for veterans.

I don't see why we shouldn't be.

We're not looking
at just sending veterans

away for a weekend, you know,
or, you know,

helping 'em catch up
on bills for a month

and then say, you know,
"Good luck,

we hope the rest
of your life's better."

When these veterans commit
to getting a Battle Buddy

through the Battle Buddy
Foundation,

and when they commit to becoming
a part of this program

and a part of this family,
it's for life.

When it comes to life
after combat,

there are no unobtainable goals.

It blows me away because I'll...
You know, I get vets

that look at me like I'm some
kind of example or something.

And I'm like, "Brother,

"man, I got the same
nightmares you do, you know.

"I've got the same, you know,
sins and the same struggles,

"you know, and the same
torment on the inside,

you know, that you do."

But instead of spending my days
hiding in the garage,

you know, thinking about it,

now, I've got no time...
I ain't got no time for that.

The most exciting thing
about the situation

we're in as veterans right now
is the potential.

If you can go take Ramadi at
18 years old with your friends,

you can do anything.
You can start a program.

You could have the biggest
program in the country.

Why not?

There's value in walking
that dark path and surviving.

You know, there's value

in being there
for your brothers and sisters.

Positive ripples just make
positive tsunamis, you know?

It just keeps getting
bigger and bigger.

I don't think it's reaching
to say that 100% of people

that have been in combat
have one buddy

that they can still
reach out to,

no matter how far
down the line they go.

Call that person,
tell that person what
you're going through.

They might be going
through the same thing.

You know, they might need you
as much as you need them.

We're all in this together,

and, um... we swore an oath.

And that oath just never dies.

If I could have a voice
to most veterans,

it's just, it gets better, man.

I think vets
really need to help vets

and let 'em know, dude,
it's gonna be all right.

Can you imagine
a company of Marines,

an entire company of Marines,

the greatest fighting force
in the world,

all dedicated to doing good
for the rest of their lives?

There's no... there's no
ceiling on that.

It could go to the moon,
I mean, it's crazy.

So, we need to spread
this positivity,

because it's out there,
people are doing it.

And I just think
that story needs to be told.

We're gonna wrap,
I wanna ask you

if there's anything
you wanna say

that we haven't said?

Any grand statement
you wanna make, anything.

Not really.
I mean, I said everything.

I don't have a grand statement.
I never did.