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1
00:00:10,989 --> 00:00:14,563
[beeping]
2
00:00:14,596 --> 00:00:18,571
[sonographer] And...
wait just one second.
3
00:00:18,604 --> 00:00:19,740
[heartbeat]
4
00:00:19,773 --> 00:00:22,177
Yes, there's baby.
5
00:00:24,382 --> 00:00:26,419
[Maya cries]
6
00:00:26,452 --> 00:00:29,391
It's a tiny, little human being.
7
00:00:29,960 --> 00:00:31,864
Oh, my God. Luke, can you see?
8
00:00:31,897 --> 00:00:35,104
It's amazing. It's beautiful.
9
00:00:35,137 --> 00:00:36,373
So beautiful.
10
00:00:36,406 --> 00:00:38,076
[heartbeat continues]
11
00:00:38,109 --> 00:00:40,548
- Is... Is that the head?
- That is the head.
12
00:00:43,286 --> 00:00:45,124
And that heartbeat,
Maya. Listen.
13
00:00:45,157 --> 00:00:48,463
[heartbeat continues]
14
00:00:48,496 --> 00:00:50,134
[laughs]
15
00:00:50,167 --> 00:00:52,673
[heartbeat continues]
16
00:00:52,706 --> 00:00:54,342
I don't know what to say.
17
00:00:54,375 --> 00:00:56,212
Fucking Nora.
18
00:00:57,816 --> 00:00:58,584
Seriously?
19
00:01:00,655 --> 00:01:04,696
You're... You're gonna
be a father? Of a baby?
20
00:01:05,598 --> 00:01:09,540
Pregnancy tests can be wrong.
They go wrong all the time.
21
00:01:09,573 --> 00:01:12,244
Maya's having a 12-week
scan on January the 2nd.
22
00:01:12,277 --> 00:01:13,446
12 weeks? [chuckles]
23
00:01:14,348 --> 00:01:17,388
Shit. Right, okay, so you've
known for a while, then.
24
00:01:17,421 --> 00:01:18,834
We don't want to jinx
anything by, like,
25
00:01:18,858 --> 00:01:20,227
announcing it too soon.
26
00:01:20,260 --> 00:01:22,131
Hmm.
27
00:01:22,164 --> 00:01:24,536
And how are you... how are
you both feeling about it?
28
00:01:24,569 --> 00:01:26,406
Really excited. [laughs]
29
00:01:26,439 --> 00:01:28,811
Uh, um, it's a big surprise.
30
00:01:28,844 --> 00:01:31,416
Say that again.
[laughs] Jesus Christ.
31
00:01:31,449 --> 00:01:32,786
It wasn't planned, but you know,
32
00:01:32,819 --> 00:01:34,923
we've talked about it forever,
33
00:01:34,956 --> 00:01:37,227
and... and we're
really, really happy.
34
00:01:39,933 --> 00:01:42,471
This is such amazing news.
35
00:01:44,175 --> 00:01:45,812
In our day, it was
normal to have kids
36
00:01:45,845 --> 00:01:47,381
at your sort of age.
37
00:01:47,414 --> 00:01:49,252
Get it over with.
38
00:01:49,285 --> 00:01:51,624
And then when they're grown
up, you're still in your 30s.
39
00:01:51,657 --> 00:01:53,761
You can have some
fun. [laughs]
40
00:01:53,794 --> 00:01:57,435
Dancing, go to Las
Vegas, all sorts.
41
00:01:57,468 --> 00:01:59,238
Have you guys thought
about schools?
42
00:01:59,271 --> 00:02:01,443
Uh, we're both still
at school, Darren.
43
00:02:01,476 --> 00:02:04,182
Yeah, you can't start too early.
44
00:02:04,215 --> 00:02:06,486
Good prep schools get
booked up really quickly,
45
00:02:06,520 --> 00:02:07,689
and the shit ones, actually.
46
00:02:08,591 --> 00:02:11,630
Sorry to be blunt, but
are you absolutely sure
47
00:02:11,663 --> 00:02:13,568
you want to go ahead with this?
48
00:02:13,601 --> 00:02:15,304
There is another
option available.
49
00:02:15,337 --> 00:02:17,509
I had a baby very young.
It ruined my life.
50
00:02:17,542 --> 00:02:18,811
- Mum!
- I might not mean you.
51
00:02:18,844 --> 00:02:20,515
What, you had a baby before me?
52
00:02:20,548 --> 00:02:22,652
We're definitely
keeping the baby.
53
00:02:22,685 --> 00:02:24,288
We know it's a
huge thing, Granny,
54
00:02:24,321 --> 00:02:25,801
but we think we know
what we're doing.
55
00:02:25,825 --> 00:02:27,428
Granny? Oh, my
God. Oh, my God.
56
00:02:27,461 --> 00:02:29,733
I'm going to be a granny,
and I'm not even 50 yet.
57
00:02:29,766 --> 00:02:31,345
There's... There's a lot
that we need to talk about.
58
00:02:31,369 --> 00:02:32,539
- Yeah.
- Okay?
59
00:02:32,572 --> 00:02:34,776
Because, for a
start, you know...
60
00:02:35,878 --> 00:02:39,385
I mean, Jesus Christ. A baby.
61
00:02:39,418 --> 00:02:40,722
[chuckles]
62
00:02:40,755 --> 00:02:42,425
Why don't I fetch
that cheese I brought
63
00:02:42,458 --> 00:02:45,230
and you can all sit around
with some oatcakes and quince
64
00:02:45,263 --> 00:02:46,967
and talk it through?
65
00:02:47,368 --> 00:02:50,708
Oh, Maya, can you eat cheese
in your, um, condition?
66
00:02:50,741 --> 00:02:52,979
Uh, no, she can't have
any soft blue cheese
67
00:02:53,012 --> 00:02:55,785
or any soft cheese
with a white rind.
68
00:02:55,818 --> 00:02:56,954
All right, no brie, then.
69
00:02:56,987 --> 00:02:58,924
Good God. I'm so
glad I'm a man.
70
00:03:06,907 --> 00:03:09,278
[Darren] What do we all fancy
falling asleep in front of?
71
00:03:09,980 --> 00:03:12,886
Is there a Bond? There's
gotta be a Bond on somewhere.
72
00:03:12,919 --> 00:03:15,257
He used to be a male
model, Sean Connery.
73
00:03:15,290 --> 00:03:16,426
Oh.
74
00:03:16,459 --> 00:03:19,031
He posed for
life-drawing classes,
75
00:03:19,064 --> 00:03:21,269
never with his old fella
hanging out, though,
76
00:03:21,302 --> 00:03:22,338
I don't think.
77
00:03:22,371 --> 00:03:24,208
[chuckles] Shame.
78
00:03:24,576 --> 00:03:28,483
We could always watch the
King's Christmas message at 3.
79
00:03:28,517 --> 00:03:30,722
Still feels funny, doesn't it,
80
00:03:30,755 --> 00:03:33,628
that it's the King's message
nowadays and not the Queen?
81
00:03:33,661 --> 00:03:35,632
Mm. Indeed.
82
00:03:35,665 --> 00:03:38,604
It's a sort of glue holding
the country together, isn't it,
83
00:03:38,637 --> 00:03:40,909
the King's Christmas message?
84
00:03:40,942 --> 00:03:43,881
Comforting, steady, solid.
85
00:03:45,918 --> 00:03:47,555
Are we gonna watch it, then?
86
00:03:48,757 --> 00:03:50,962
No. The Gruffalo's on.
87
00:03:50,995 --> 00:03:52,799
Oh. Great.
88
00:03:52,832 --> 00:03:55,738
[Jim] I fuckin'
love the Gruffalo.
89
00:03:55,771 --> 00:03:56,841
[Maya] These glasses...
90
00:03:56,874 --> 00:03:58,845
Do these go in this cupboard?
91
00:03:58,878 --> 00:04:00,815
Uh, no. One next to
it. Thanks, Maya.
92
00:04:03,587 --> 00:04:04,866
So, just to be clear,
you're still...
93
00:04:04,890 --> 00:04:07,061
You're still planning
to go to university?
94
00:04:07,094 --> 00:04:09,365
Uh, if I can get into a
London college, then yeah.
95
00:04:09,398 --> 00:04:10,944
And then my mum, my dad,
and my sister will help out
96
00:04:10,968 --> 00:04:12,438
with the baby
while I'm studying.
97
00:04:12,471 --> 00:04:13,817
- Oh.
- And then hopefully I'll get
98
00:04:13,841 --> 00:04:15,578
into a London uni, too,
and then I can work
99
00:04:15,611 --> 00:04:17,090
- evenings and weekends.
- S-Sorry, hang on.
100
00:04:17,114 --> 00:04:18,684
Um, what about
101
00:04:18,717 --> 00:04:20,588
the music production
course in Manchester?
102
00:04:20,621 --> 00:04:23,426
Oh, yeah, that was just a
mad punt. I won't get in.
103
00:04:23,459 --> 00:04:24,428
- Oh.
- There's, like,
104
00:04:24,461 --> 00:04:26,499
400 applications for 15 places.
105
00:04:26,533 --> 00:04:29,338
- Uh-huh.
- I've applied to Durham, too,
106
00:04:29,371 --> 00:04:31,376
but I won't go even
if I get an offer.
107
00:04:31,409 --> 00:04:33,514
And all my other
choices are in London.
108
00:04:33,547 --> 00:04:37,421
Right. Babies are expensive,
Luke. They just are.
109
00:04:37,454 --> 00:04:39,560
A part-time job's
not gonna cut it.
110
00:04:39,593 --> 00:04:41,931
Uh, my parents will help out
financially at the beginning.
111
00:04:41,964 --> 00:04:43,510
- Oh, yeah, I was just...
- Yeah, we can help out, too.
112
00:04:43,534 --> 00:04:44,845
- So, we can do that as well.
- We can help out, too.
113
00:04:44,869 --> 00:04:47,775
- Yeah, to... to an extent, yeah.
- Yeah, absolutely.
114
00:04:50,548 --> 00:04:52,719
Look, I... I know
it's a total shock.
115
00:04:52,752 --> 00:04:54,030
It was a shock to my
parents when we told them.
116
00:04:54,054 --> 00:04:55,558
Mm.
117
00:04:55,591 --> 00:04:57,528
Uh, 'cause your
parents already know?
118
00:04:58,897 --> 00:05:00,577
Just because of me
moving in and everything.
119
00:05:00,601 --> 00:05:02,672
Oh, yeah, yeah. No, no,
obviously they needed to...
120
00:05:02,705 --> 00:05:04,342
- to know.
- Yeah.
121
00:05:04,375 --> 00:05:05,310
[chuckles nervously]
122
00:05:07,515 --> 00:05:12,726
So, um, can this scan tell
you the sex of the baby?
123
00:05:12,759 --> 00:05:15,364
Not accurately, but it
can tell you the due date
124
00:05:15,397 --> 00:05:16,867
and whether you're
expecting twins.
125
00:05:17,669 --> 00:05:21,644
So, I mean, are we allowed
to come to the scan...
126
00:05:21,677 --> 00:05:25,685
I mean, scan... are parents...
Grandparent... grandparents-to-be,
127
00:05:25,718 --> 00:05:29,058
are they allowed to...
To be at the scan?
128
00:05:29,091 --> 00:05:31,396
Uh, in the actual scan room,
129
00:05:31,429 --> 00:05:33,634
they say they only
allow two other people,
130
00:05:33,667 --> 00:05:35,572
apart from Luke...
and me, obviously.
131
00:05:35,605 --> 00:05:38,476
Oh, yeah, you're kind
of essential. Yeah.
132
00:05:38,510 --> 00:05:40,480
But, uh, other people
can wait outside.
133
00:05:40,514 --> 00:05:41,482
Mm-hmm.
134
00:05:42,484 --> 00:05:44,690
Okay. Oh, that's great.
135
00:05:44,723 --> 00:05:46,025
That's good.
136
00:05:46,058 --> 00:05:47,796
So, are you, uh, are
you pleased for us?
137
00:05:47,829 --> 00:05:49,766
[inhales deeply]
138
00:05:49,799 --> 00:05:51,002
Yeah, yes, yes. [chuckles]
139
00:05:51,035 --> 00:05:53,641
Yeah, I mean, It's...
It's a shock, obviously.
140
00:05:53,674 --> 00:05:56,446
But as everyone said,
it is a huge shock.
141
00:05:56,479 --> 00:05:57,758
But, yeah, we're...
yeah, we're...
142
00:05:57,782 --> 00:05:59,953
Yeah, we're really
happy for you.
143
00:06:03,694 --> 00:06:06,165
Ah, it's a fucking disaster, Al.
144
00:06:06,198 --> 00:06:08,904
- He's 18.
- Mm-hmm.
145
00:06:08,937 --> 00:06:10,006
[whispers] 18.
146
00:06:11,175 --> 00:06:14,750
- She's... 18.
- Mm-hmm.
147
00:06:14,783 --> 00:06:19,058
18. They're both...
18 years old.
148
00:06:19,091 --> 00:06:20,561
It's like a Ken
Loach film, innit?
149
00:06:20,594 --> 00:06:24,569
- [sighs]
- Or I don't know. Fuckin'...
150
00:06:24,602 --> 00:06:25,203
- [snaps fingers]
- What's that... What's that movie?
151
00:06:25,236 --> 00:06:26,874
Juno?
152
00:06:26,907 --> 00:06:28,443
It's like fucking
Juno, isn't it?
153
00:06:28,476 --> 00:06:30,748
- It's not exactly like Juno.
- Well, whatever.
154
00:06:31,684 --> 00:06:33,530
[sighs] I guess we're just
gonna have to cope with it.
155
00:06:33,554 --> 00:06:35,089
There's... There's
no alternative.
156
00:06:35,758 --> 00:06:37,562
- There clearly is.
- What?
157
00:06:37,595 --> 00:06:39,700
Wh-What your mum said.
The obvious alternative.
158
00:06:39,733 --> 00:06:41,537
They're keeping the baby, Paul.
159
00:06:41,570 --> 00:06:42,715
They said they've
thought about it.
160
00:06:42,739 --> 00:06:43,950
They've talked about
it. They're keeping it.
161
00:06:43,974 --> 00:06:45,119
Well, maybe they've not
thought hard enough.
162
00:06:45,143 --> 00:06:46,680
Do you know what I mean?
163
00:06:46,713 --> 00:06:48,158
Maybe some grownups
need to talk to them.
164
00:06:48,182 --> 00:06:50,120
We can't be the ones to
suggest a termination.
165
00:06:50,153 --> 00:06:51,666
They'll hate us, and we're
already on the back foot.
166
00:06:51,690 --> 00:06:53,661
- How?
- Maya's parents have known
167
00:06:53,694 --> 00:06:56,867
about this for ages.
They're way ahead of us.
168
00:06:56,900 --> 00:06:58,738
[sighs] They'll be the ones
169
00:06:58,771 --> 00:07:00,049
in the room at the
scan, won't they?
170
00:07:00,073 --> 00:07:02,478
Yeah. Yes, they will.
171
00:07:02,512 --> 00:07:04,850
Every single family has an
alpha set of grandparents
172
00:07:04,883 --> 00:07:07,164
and a beta set, and we're in
danger of becoming the betas.
173
00:07:09,224 --> 00:07:10,928
- It's mad!
- Mm.
174
00:07:10,961 --> 00:07:12,264
- Us being...
- I know.
175
00:07:12,297 --> 00:07:14,836
Grandparents is unreal.
176
00:07:14,869 --> 00:07:19,011
It's like, get a fucking
OBE or something,
177
00:07:19,044 --> 00:07:21,850
new hip, becoming a magistrate.
178
00:07:21,883 --> 00:07:24,055
[sighs] I'm at the
denial stage, I think.
179
00:07:24,088 --> 00:07:25,232
Are you at the anger stage yet?
180
00:07:25,256 --> 00:07:26,602
I'm always at the
fucking anger stage.
181
00:07:26,626 --> 00:07:27,871
What are the other stages again?
182
00:07:27,895 --> 00:07:30,000
- [laughs] Um, denial...
- [exhales deeply]
183
00:07:30,033 --> 00:07:33,574
anger, bargaining,
depression, um...
184
00:07:33,607 --> 00:07:36,145
- Sporty, Scary, Posh.
- [laughs]
185
00:07:36,178 --> 00:07:37,749
- Divorced, beheaded, died.
- [laughing]
186
00:07:37,782 --> 00:07:40,888
Divorce... Divorced,
beheaded, survived.
187
00:07:40,921 --> 00:07:45,230
Oh, God. [laughs]
188
00:07:45,263 --> 00:07:47,034
[whispers] Fucking
hell, though, Al.
189
00:07:47,067 --> 00:07:48,671
I know.
190
00:07:48,704 --> 00:07:50,073
[exhales deeply]
191
00:07:50,106 --> 00:07:52,578
Right. Night, night, Grandpa.
192
00:07:53,379 --> 00:07:57,154
- Teeth out. Catheter in.
- No, but, really, babe, babe.
193
00:07:57,187 --> 00:07:59,593
This is such a massive shitshow.
194
00:07:59,626 --> 00:08:01,629
It could ruin Luke's
life. It could.
195
00:08:02,163 --> 00:08:04,936
We won't let it, I promise.
196
00:08:04,969 --> 00:08:07,542
Hey. Yeah. Mmm.
197
00:08:07,575 --> 00:08:09,178
[exhales deeply]
198
00:08:09,211 --> 00:08:09,979
[switch clicks]
199
00:08:11,683 --> 00:08:12,585
[switch clicks]
200
00:08:16,142 --> 00:08:17,923
Sorry Ava we're holding you up.
201
00:08:18,296 --> 00:08:19,966
We're like a couple of tortoises
202
00:08:19,999 --> 00:08:22,237
who've had a fall and
then shat themselves.
203
00:08:22,270 --> 00:08:25,110
It's fine. It's nice
to go slowly sometimes.
204
00:08:25,143 --> 00:08:28,083
It's good to get out
for a Boxing Day walk.
205
00:08:28,116 --> 00:08:31,824
You need to keep moving, or
you seize up, body and mind.
206
00:08:31,857 --> 00:08:34,095
It isn't Boxing
Day, though, is it?
207
00:08:34,128 --> 00:08:36,032
- Isn't it?
- Is it?
208
00:08:36,065 --> 00:08:38,169
It's the 27th.
209
00:08:38,202 --> 00:08:42,210
Oh, so it's like the
Boxing Day of Boxing Day.
210
00:08:42,745 --> 00:08:45,584
Which would make Christmas
Day Boxing Day Eve.
211
00:08:48,089 --> 00:08:50,293
So...
212
00:08:50,326 --> 00:08:53,600
how are you feeling about
Luke and all that, Ava?
213
00:08:56,640 --> 00:08:57,975
20 seconds.
214
00:08:58,777 --> 00:09:00,147
Sorry, love?
215
00:09:00,180 --> 00:09:03,286
There were 20 seconds
at Christmas dinner
216
00:09:03,319 --> 00:09:05,290
just after Luke said he
was moving in with Maya,
217
00:09:05,323 --> 00:09:08,029
where I thought, okay, maybe
218
00:09:08,062 --> 00:09:11,637
it's finally time for me to be
number one kid in the family.
219
00:09:11,670 --> 00:09:15,778
Right. And then he said
he was gonna be a dad.
220
00:09:15,811 --> 00:09:17,682
And then I wasn't even
number two kid again.
221
00:09:17,715 --> 00:09:20,119
I was suddenly number
three because of the baby.
222
00:09:21,990 --> 00:09:25,898
I'm jealous of a baby. Not
even a baby. An unborn baby.
223
00:09:25,931 --> 00:09:26,866
[sighs]
224
00:09:29,806 --> 00:09:31,351
So, what do you think of
your new place, Granny?
225
00:09:31,375 --> 00:09:33,146
Oh, wonderful.
226
00:09:33,179 --> 00:09:36,152
I wish we'd moved to
sheltered housing years ago.
227
00:09:36,185 --> 00:09:38,223
There's all sorts going on.
228
00:09:38,256 --> 00:09:43,801
Dance class, cookery class,
art class, book club, yoga.
229
00:09:43,834 --> 00:09:46,640
There's a hairdresser
comes once a week... Holly.
230
00:09:46,673 --> 00:09:48,978
Uh, chiropodist... Cliff.
231
00:09:49,011 --> 00:09:50,915
Oh. I love it.
232
00:09:50,948 --> 00:09:52,685
And what about you, Granddad?
233
00:09:52,718 --> 00:09:54,823
I think it's the
penultimate stop
234
00:09:54,856 --> 00:09:56,291
on my journey to the grave.
235
00:09:57,427 --> 00:09:59,198
Like Battersea Park Station
236
00:09:59,231 --> 00:10:02,104
when you're on the
train into Victoria,
237
00:10:02,137 --> 00:10:05,945
only Victoria is death,
and Battersea Park is
238
00:10:05,978 --> 00:10:07,949
coughing up blood
and getting jaundice.
239
00:10:07,982 --> 00:10:09,819
Oh, wow. Thanks, Jim.
240
00:10:09,852 --> 00:10:11,923
You've ruined that
train journey for me.
241
00:10:13,894 --> 00:10:15,931
Look. Look.
242
00:10:16,465 --> 00:10:18,102
We've got some veggie
cup-a-soups, Ava,
243
00:10:18,135 --> 00:10:21,275
if you fancy one,
mushroom and sweet corn.
244
00:10:21,308 --> 00:10:22,845
Great, thank you.
245
00:10:22,878 --> 00:10:24,716
I've started knitting
some little baby clothes
246
00:10:24,749 --> 00:10:26,720
for the great-grandchild.
247
00:10:26,753 --> 00:10:29,258
- Booties, a cardigan.
- That's nice.
248
00:10:29,291 --> 00:10:30,393
Mind your Gran's jigsaw.
249
00:10:32,030 --> 00:10:33,399
What is it?
250
00:10:33,432 --> 00:10:35,112
- Fucking enormous.
- Constable's Hay Wain.
251
00:10:36,740 --> 00:10:39,713
[whooshing]
252
00:10:39,746 --> 00:10:41,884
[sonographer] Everything's
looking absolutely fine.
253
00:10:41,917 --> 00:10:43,721
[Maya] Great.
254
00:10:43,754 --> 00:10:45,834
[sonographer] The placenta's
in exactly the right position.
255
00:10:45,858 --> 00:10:48,263
Oh, brilliant. And
it's just one baby?
256
00:10:48,296 --> 00:10:50,166
- Just the one, yes.
- [whispers] Oh, right.
257
00:10:50,199 --> 00:10:52,271
Unless its twin is
very good at hiding.
258
00:10:52,304 --> 00:10:54,174
[laughter]
259
00:10:54,207 --> 00:10:56,747
- One's enough for Luke.
- Yeah.
260
00:10:56,780 --> 00:10:59,051
[voice breaking]
Just feels, like...
261
00:10:59,084 --> 00:11:01,757
really real now,
doesn't it, Luke?
262
00:11:01,790 --> 00:11:02,926
Too real.
263
00:11:02,959 --> 00:11:05,430
[machine continues whooshing]
264
00:11:05,463 --> 00:11:07,200
No, not... not too real.
265
00:11:07,233 --> 00:11:09,706
Like, real enough.
266
00:11:09,739 --> 00:11:11,777
You know, really... real.
267
00:11:11,810 --> 00:11:13,847
[whooshing continues]
268
00:11:15,000 --> 00:11:21,074
api.OpenSubtitles.org is deprecated, please
implement REST API from OpenSubtitles.com
269
00:11:23,065 --> 00:11:24,735
- That's almost it.
- Great. No hurry.
270
00:11:27,240 --> 00:11:29,913
- Quick final check?
- Yep.
271
00:11:29,946 --> 00:11:32,785
Uh, your telly and PlayStation
are still down there.
272
00:11:32,818 --> 00:11:35,090
Yeah, I-I think I might just
keep 'em here, actually.
273
00:11:35,123 --> 00:11:38,229
Oh, right. You sure?
274
00:11:38,262 --> 00:11:40,467
Yeah, there's not a lot of
space in Maya's room, so...
275
00:11:40,500 --> 00:11:41,435
Okay.
276
00:11:42,938 --> 00:11:45,143
[sighs] Also, I-I think I'd just
277
00:11:45,176 --> 00:11:47,616
quite like to get away sometimes
and be a kid again, you know?
278
00:11:48,784 --> 00:11:50,420
- Maybe here...
- Mm-hmm.
279
00:11:50,453 --> 00:11:52,759
With Jacob? Have
some Jacob time.
280
00:11:52,792 --> 00:11:54,194
Oh. Okay.
281
00:11:55,396 --> 00:11:57,167
H-How is, um...
282
00:11:57,200 --> 00:11:59,371
weird Jacob taking
all the baby news?
283
00:11:59,404 --> 00:12:01,777
- Uh... [chuckles] obsessed.
- [laughs]
284
00:12:01,810 --> 00:12:06,118
He's, um, he's Googling recipes
for Maya to combat constipation,
285
00:12:06,151 --> 00:12:09,091
and he's got a fetal
growth chart on his fridge.
286
00:12:09,124 --> 00:12:11,228
- Christ, he's amazing.
- Yeah.
287
00:12:11,261 --> 00:12:14,936
And a fucking
lunatic. [laughs] Hey.
288
00:12:14,969 --> 00:12:17,341
- Hi! I haven't been crying.
- Oh, good.
289
00:12:17,374 --> 00:12:20,213
Oh, Lukey. I don't
want you to go.
290
00:12:20,246 --> 00:12:21,950
- Won't be far away.
- No, I know.
291
00:12:21,983 --> 00:12:23,988
And I'll... I'll pop in a lot.
292
00:12:24,021 --> 00:12:26,201
Maya's family don't swear
that often, so I'll have to...
293
00:12:26,225 --> 00:12:28,363
- Oh. [laughs]
- [laughs] Funny.
294
00:12:28,396 --> 00:12:30,100
- See you soon.
- Bye.
295
00:12:30,133 --> 00:12:31,837
We'll see you on New Year's Eve?
296
00:12:31,870 --> 00:12:33,081
Uh, no, I think we're
gonna be spending it
297
00:12:33,105 --> 00:12:34,417
at Maya's sister's,
if that's okay.
298
00:12:34,441 --> 00:12:37,214
No, sure, absolutely. See
you at the scan, then.
299
00:12:37,247 --> 00:12:40,855
Or the waiting room, whatever,
depending. [chuckles]
300
00:12:40,888 --> 00:12:42,859
Yeah. See you then.
301
00:12:42,892 --> 00:12:44,538
Love you guys, and give
my love to Ava as well.
302
00:12:44,562 --> 00:12:45,573
- Will do. Love you.
- All right. Love you, mate.
303
00:12:45,597 --> 00:12:46,933
Cheers, Steve.
304
00:12:52,511 --> 00:12:53,445
[sighs]
305
00:12:55,249 --> 00:12:57,254
I think Maya should
have a termination.
306
00:12:57,287 --> 00:12:58,222
Hmm.
307
00:12:59,424 --> 00:13:00,927
- Hang on, what?
- [door opens]
308
00:13:01,896 --> 00:13:03,299
No. What was that?
309
00:13:03,332 --> 00:13:04,869
You said the same a
couple of days ago,
310
00:13:04,902 --> 00:13:06,147
Yeah, but then you
said the opposite.
311
00:13:06,171 --> 00:13:08,510
Luke is gonna ruin
his life, Paul.
312
00:13:08,543 --> 00:13:11,415
He's gonna throw away his future
and his 20s and everything
313
00:13:11,448 --> 00:13:13,453
- that's out there for him.
- What about the whole
314
00:13:13,486 --> 00:13:15,065
alpha grandparents thing
you were talking about?
315
00:13:15,089 --> 00:13:18,262
Fuck being grandparents!
We need to be parents!
316
00:13:18,295 --> 00:13:21,168
We need to step up and stop him
from throwing everything away.
317
00:13:21,201 --> 00:13:23,048
[inhales sharply] You
really mean it, though, hon?
318
00:13:23,072 --> 00:13:24,876
- The "A" word.
- Not really.
319
00:13:24,909 --> 00:13:25,620
- Abortion.
- No, I know what you meant.
320
00:13:25,644 --> 00:13:29,017
- Sorry.
- No, not really, no, no.
321
00:13:29,050 --> 00:13:31,590
I just... Oh. Maya
wants this baby.
322
00:13:31,623 --> 00:13:34,428
- Right.
- Luke wants this baby, but...
323
00:13:34,461 --> 00:13:36,040
this is just about the
hardest bit of parenting
324
00:13:36,064 --> 00:13:38,302
that we've ever had to
do, and I'm... I am fucked
325
00:13:38,335 --> 00:13:39,906
if I know how we can manage it.
326
00:13:39,939 --> 00:13:42,310
Okay, me and you need
to get in sync, okay?
327
00:13:42,343 --> 00:13:44,481
Me and you need to
get off the back foot,
328
00:13:44,515 --> 00:13:48,156
get ourselves fired up, and in
the fucking room for that scan.
329
00:13:48,189 --> 00:13:50,594
- You're right.
- New year, new us.
330
00:13:50,627 --> 00:13:53,533
[swing jazz music playing]
331
00:13:57,508 --> 00:14:00,080
Oh, I think I nodded off
there for a minute. [yawns]
332
00:14:00,113 --> 00:14:02,317
I'd fallen asleep, so I
didn't notice you nodding off.
333
00:14:02,350 --> 00:14:04,321
- [yawns] Mm.
- Well...
334
00:14:04,354 --> 00:14:06,927
three minutes to
the Big Ben bongs.
335
00:14:06,960 --> 00:14:08,496
Shall I put BBC One
on for the bongs?
336
00:14:08,530 --> 00:14:10,968
Uh-huh, uh-huh. [sighs]
I'll go... I'll go get Ava.
337
00:14:11,001 --> 00:14:12,003
Okay.
338
00:14:15,109 --> 00:14:16,589
- [chuckles]
- Fuck it. I'll text her.
339
00:14:17,681 --> 00:14:18,950
[sighs]
340
00:14:22,257 --> 00:14:23,927
Oh, do you need
topping up, babe?
341
00:14:23,960 --> 00:14:25,363
- Yeah.
- Okay.
342
00:14:25,396 --> 00:14:26,933
Can't reach.
343
00:14:28,102 --> 00:14:29,572
[chuckles] Help.
344
00:14:30,273 --> 00:14:31,610
Hi, love.
345
00:14:31,643 --> 00:14:33,212
Hey, do you wanna
enjoy some champagne?
346
00:14:33,245 --> 00:14:34,481
No, thanks.
347
00:14:34,515 --> 00:14:37,087
- What have you been up to?
- Revising.
348
00:14:37,120 --> 00:14:40,360
There's a history module that
I'm sort of struggling with,
349
00:14:40,393 --> 00:14:42,532
and anyway, boring, but
I need to work on it.
350
00:14:42,565 --> 00:14:45,369
- Can we help?
- It's fine.
351
00:14:45,971 --> 00:14:48,142
- Hmm.
- We know it's been tough
352
00:14:48,175 --> 00:14:52,217
for you, you know, with the
baby and the focus on Luke.
353
00:14:52,250 --> 00:14:55,123
- It's fine.
- Ah. It's not, though.
354
00:14:55,156 --> 00:14:58,095
It's a big thing for Luke. You
need to concentrate on him.
355
00:14:58,128 --> 00:14:59,666
I haven't got any
big things going on.
356
00:14:59,699 --> 00:15:02,505
Well, you... you have, just
not as dramatic as Luke.
357
00:15:02,538 --> 00:15:04,509
- Luke has always been dramatic.
- Yeah.
358
00:15:04,542 --> 00:15:06,513
Nearly dying, punching
me in the face.
359
00:15:06,546 --> 00:15:09,952
He's always been a
bit... primary colors.
360
00:15:13,693 --> 00:15:18,002
Is it all right if... I don't
really care about this baby?
361
00:15:18,035 --> 00:15:20,006
[people on TV counting down]
362
00:15:20,039 --> 00:15:23,446
Y-Yes, of... of course
that is allowed.
363
00:15:23,479 --> 00:15:24,716
[people on TV cheering]
364
00:15:24,749 --> 00:15:26,318
- Oh.
- Oh.
365
00:15:26,351 --> 00:15:28,122
- Happy New Year.
- Happy New Year.
366
00:15:28,155 --> 00:15:29,424
- Hey.
- [glasses clink]
367
00:15:29,457 --> 00:15:31,428
[cheering continues,
fireworks popping on TV]
368
00:15:31,461 --> 00:15:33,432
[cellphone chimes]
369
00:15:33,465 --> 00:15:35,136
[Big Ben tolling]
370
00:15:35,169 --> 00:15:38,008
[fireworks and
cheering continue]
371
00:15:40,714 --> 00:15:43,452
I might have that glass
of champagne, actually.
372
00:15:43,485 --> 00:15:45,289
Yeah, of course. Coming up.
373
00:15:50,667 --> 00:15:53,305
[birds chirping]
374
00:15:55,510 --> 00:15:57,080
So, have we gone past it?
375
00:15:57,113 --> 00:15:58,458
It definitely said
radiology this way,
376
00:15:58,482 --> 00:15:59,719
but the signs have run out.
377
00:15:59,752 --> 00:16:01,388
Right, so hang...
hang on, hang on.
378
00:16:01,421 --> 00:16:03,401
Is X-Ray Department the same
as Radiology Department?
379
00:16:03,425 --> 00:16:05,664
- Oh, shit, we're gonna be late.
- That's fucking mad!
380
00:16:05,697 --> 00:16:08,268
Isn't it? Having... Having
two... Two names for the...
381
00:16:08,603 --> 00:16:10,306
Babe! Hon?
382
00:16:11,809 --> 00:16:14,582
- Is it cold?
- The gel?
383
00:16:14,615 --> 00:16:17,220
Only at first, but
you'll be tense,
384
00:16:17,253 --> 00:16:20,260
so you'll probably jump a
little bit, which means, Luke,
385
00:16:20,293 --> 00:16:22,197
you'll probably jump
a little bit, too.
386
00:16:22,230 --> 00:16:24,201
[laughs] Yeah, probably.
387
00:16:24,234 --> 00:16:25,513
Seeing inside a
human body, though,
388
00:16:25,537 --> 00:16:27,140
that's... that's pretty cool.
389
00:16:27,173 --> 00:16:28,619
Wait till your first
colonoscopy. Luke.
390
00:16:28,643 --> 00:16:30,280
- [laughter]
- [Ally] Oh.
391
00:16:30,313 --> 00:16:32,785
Hi. So sorry we're
late. Rubbish signs.
392
00:16:32,818 --> 00:16:35,156
Yeah, we... we went down
every corridor twice,
393
00:16:35,189 --> 00:16:38,396
like some NHS Pac-Man.
Anyway, I'm sorry. I'm Paul.
394
00:16:38,429 --> 00:16:40,166
Ah. Great to meet
you, Paul. I'm Sunil.
395
00:16:40,199 --> 00:16:41,368
- This is my wife Meena.
- Oh.
396
00:16:41,401 --> 00:16:43,472
- Meena, I'm Ally.
- [Sunil] Hi, Ally.
397
00:16:43,506 --> 00:16:45,644
- How you doing, love?
- Uh, a little bit nervous.
398
00:16:45,677 --> 00:16:49,217
Understandable. I'm a bit
nervous, too. [laughs]
399
00:16:49,250 --> 00:16:51,221
[sighs] How are you, sport?
400
00:16:51,254 --> 00:16:54,361
Um... I'm a little bit nervous
as well, if I'm honest.
401
00:16:54,394 --> 00:16:56,633
- I'm perfectly calm.
- [laughter]
402
00:16:56,666 --> 00:16:59,572
No, he's not. He was up at 5:00
this morning cleaning the oven.
403
00:16:59,605 --> 00:17:01,107
Oh. [chuckles]
404
00:17:04,280 --> 00:17:06,160
- Uh, happy New Year, by the way.
- [Sunil] Yes!
405
00:17:06,184 --> 00:17:07,864
Happy New Year. Did you
do anything special?
406
00:17:07,888 --> 00:17:10,326
Uh, no, just, uh, fell asleep
in front of the telly, right?
407
00:17:10,359 --> 00:17:11,519
Then... then the bongs and...
408
00:17:11,896 --> 00:17:14,267
[chuckles] The BBC bongs?
409
00:17:14,300 --> 00:17:16,673
- Always. The official bongs.
- [laughter]
410
00:17:16,706 --> 00:17:18,810
Never trust Jools
Holland's bongs.
411
00:17:18,843 --> 00:17:20,413
- They're pre-recorded.
- [laughter]
412
00:17:20,446 --> 00:17:21,683
- True.
- [Paul] Yeah.
413
00:17:21,716 --> 00:17:23,319
We all had, uh,
dinner at my sister's.
414
00:17:23,352 --> 00:17:24,454
She's got a three-year-old.
415
00:17:24,487 --> 00:17:26,660
- Ah, lovely.
- Oh, that's a lovely age.
416
00:17:26,693 --> 00:17:29,799
I mean, to be. It's an
absolute bastard for a parent.
417
00:17:29,832 --> 00:17:31,670
- [laughter]
- Yeah, and, uh,
418
00:17:31,703 --> 00:17:33,415
Maya didn't sleep through
the night till she was, what,
419
00:17:33,439 --> 00:17:34,709
- four years old?
- [Ally] Oh.
420
00:17:34,742 --> 00:17:36,412
- [Sunil] Yeah.
- It almost killed us.
421
00:17:36,445 --> 00:17:38,282
- We almost murdered her.
- Yeah.
422
00:17:38,315 --> 00:17:39,635
- [laughter]
- [sonographer] Maya?
423
00:17:39,719 --> 00:17:41,188
Hi.
424
00:17:41,221 --> 00:17:42,567
We'll be ready for
you in five minutes.
425
00:17:42,591 --> 00:17:44,695
- Oh, great.
- And are you the dad?
426
00:17:47,467 --> 00:17:49,438
Y-Yeah, I'm the dad, yeah.
427
00:17:49,471 --> 00:17:52,310
We can only have two of you in
the scanning room, I'm afraid.
428
00:17:55,383 --> 00:17:59,458
[whooshing]
429
00:17:59,491 --> 00:18:01,596
[Maya, voice breaking]
It's just, um...
430
00:18:01,629 --> 00:18:04,602
It just feels really real
now, doesn't it, Luke?
431
00:18:04,635 --> 00:18:07,306
[Luke] Yeah. Too real.
432
00:18:09,477 --> 00:18:11,583
No, not... not... not
too real, obviously.
433
00:18:11,616 --> 00:18:14,789
Just real enough, you
know? Really real.
434
00:18:14,822 --> 00:18:16,735
Oh, it's the best thing I've
seen on telly in months.
435
00:18:16,759 --> 00:18:18,428
[laughter]
436
00:18:18,930 --> 00:18:20,834
- Can you see okay there?
- Yeah. [chuckles]
437
00:18:22,738 --> 00:18:25,877
- It's amazing, isn't it?
- Really amazing.
438
00:18:28,616 --> 00:18:31,321
Babies really live up
to the hype, don't they?
439
00:18:36,264 --> 00:18:37,467
- They're 18.
- I know!
440
00:18:37,500 --> 00:18:39,571
- It's mad.
- It's terrifying, Paul.
441
00:18:40,005 --> 00:18:41,643
I-I mean, we have
to support them.
442
00:18:41,676 --> 00:18:43,212
- Mm-hmm.
- Well, of course, yeah.
443
00:18:43,245 --> 00:18:45,349
- But also...
- Exactly.
444
00:18:45,382 --> 00:18:47,630
It could be a disaster. In
fact, my first reaction was,
445
00:18:47,654 --> 00:18:49,892
- this is a disaster.
- Mm-hmm.
446
00:18:49,925 --> 00:18:53,567
But Meena managed to row me back
to this could be a disaster.
447
00:18:53,600 --> 00:18:55,403
But they're 18.
448
00:18:55,436 --> 00:18:58,209
I've got whiskey older than
that and some T-shirts.
449
00:18:58,242 --> 00:18:59,746
- [chuckles]
- It's so nice to know
450
00:18:59,779 --> 00:19:01,215
you're as freaked out as we are.
451
00:19:01,248 --> 00:19:02,894
Oh, I'm as freaked out
as I've ever been, Ally,
452
00:19:02,918 --> 00:19:03,763
and I've been freaked out a lot.
453
00:19:03,787 --> 00:19:05,423
- Ah.
- Oh, hey!
454
00:19:05,456 --> 00:19:06,826
- Hey, hey.
- Hi.
455
00:19:06,859 --> 00:19:10,366
- Hey. How was it, Maya?
- [sighs] Amazing.
456
00:19:10,399 --> 00:19:12,437
- Super amazing.
- It really was.
457
00:19:12,470 --> 00:19:14,383
- [Sunil] Did your mother cry?
- Of course she did.
458
00:19:14,407 --> 00:19:16,311
She used to cry at
Bob the Builder.
459
00:19:16,344 --> 00:19:18,650
- It was the camaraderie.
- Sure.
460
00:19:18,683 --> 00:19:20,954
- [laughter]
- Oh, while I remember,
461
00:19:20,987 --> 00:19:22,792
Granny Jackie asked
me to give you these.
462
00:19:22,825 --> 00:19:24,494
She's knitted
something for the baby.
463
00:19:26,899 --> 00:19:28,268
They're huge.
464
00:19:28,937 --> 00:19:30,841
I'm sure the baby
will grow into them.
465
00:19:30,874 --> 00:19:32,419
Yeah, and if not, I
can always wear them
466
00:19:32,443 --> 00:19:34,347
- when I'm doing the gardening.
- [laughter]
467
00:19:42,698 --> 00:19:45,671
- I'm really glad I saw the baby.
- Mm.
468
00:19:45,704 --> 00:19:47,875
- I think I'll be a good auntie.
- Oof.
469
00:19:47,908 --> 00:19:49,678
I think you'll be
an excellent auntie.
470
00:19:53,318 --> 00:19:55,557
So, have you two come to
terms with Luke being a dad?
471
00:19:55,590 --> 00:19:56,525
- Fuck, no.
- Never.
472
00:19:56,575 --> 00:20:01,125
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