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1
00:00:08,228 --> 00:00:09,957
What'll it be, Mac?
2
00:00:12,299 --> 00:00:15,735
- I'm looking for a private eye.
- Yeah?
3
00:00:16,036 --> 00:00:19,472
Maybe you know him? Perry Gunite?
4
00:00:19,539 --> 00:00:22,702
Sure. The daddy of them all.
5
00:00:22,943 --> 00:00:24,342
There he is now.
6
00:00:31,318 --> 00:00:33,980
Yes, sir, Mr. Gunite. What'll it be?
7
00:00:34,120 --> 00:00:35,747
Rocks over rocks.
8
00:01:40,220 --> 00:01:42,654
Yoo-hoo. Wilma, are you home?
9
00:01:42,722 --> 00:01:46,021
Hi, Betty. Just a minute. I'll open the door.
10
00:01:46,660 --> 00:01:48,321
Ta-da!
11
00:01:48,395 --> 00:01:50,727
What's going on? The Roller Derby?
12
00:01:50,797 --> 00:01:53,561
Come on in.
I'm gonna try some figure eights.
13
00:01:53,633 --> 00:01:56,898
I know, the hard way. Two fours.
14
00:01:57,804 --> 00:01:59,396
Look out, Wilma!
15
00:02:01,942 --> 00:02:04,638
That's doing it the hard way all right.
16
00:02:04,878 --> 00:02:06,869
What's this all about?
17
00:02:06,947 --> 00:02:11,611
I was cleaning out the storage closet,
and I found this box full of souvenirs.
18
00:02:11,785 --> 00:02:14,618
Some of them go way back
to Boulder High.
19
00:02:14,854 --> 00:02:17,914
I was wearing these skates
the first time I went out with Fred.
20
00:02:17,991 --> 00:02:21,358
- We went roller skating.
- What's that picture?
21
00:02:21,595 --> 00:02:26,123
It's Fred in uniform.
First-string catcher on the ball team.
22
00:02:26,900 --> 00:02:29,266
That's me. The one with the knobby knees.
23
00:02:29,336 --> 00:02:33,272
I didn't think
you were a fatso on the half-shell.
24
00:02:33,940 --> 00:02:36,067
What's this, a poem?
25
00:02:36,977 --> 00:02:40,242
"I love thee, Wilma
With hair like silk
26
00:02:40,313 --> 00:02:43,180
"Lips like cherries
Skin like milk
27
00:02:44,317 --> 00:02:47,878
"Your shell-like ears
Your dainty hands
28
00:02:47,954 --> 00:02:51,685
"And eyes so black
Like frying pans"
29
00:02:51,758 --> 00:02:54,522
Frying pans? Oh, brother.
30
00:02:54,828 --> 00:02:57,763
Fred wrote that
when we were in high school.
31
00:02:58,531 --> 00:03:01,159
At 16, that was beautiful.
32
00:03:01,568 --> 00:03:04,969
I must show it to Fred.
He'll get a big kick out of it.
33
00:03:15,181 --> 00:03:18,912
My goodness, it's 3:00.
I've got to run downtown to the jeweler's.
34
00:03:18,985 --> 00:03:21,920
- The jeweler's?
- Fred's birthday is next week.
35
00:03:21,988 --> 00:03:24,923
I'm buying him a watch.
And it's a big secret.
36
00:03:25,659 --> 00:03:28,560
So whatever you do, don't tell Barney...
37
00:03:28,628 --> 00:03:30,755
or he'll blab to Fred. So long.
38
00:03:31,765 --> 00:03:34,495
Frying pan eyes.
39
00:03:35,635 --> 00:03:38,263
- What's up?
- You forgot the skates.
40
00:03:38,571 --> 00:03:40,334
For goodness' sake.
41
00:03:42,475 --> 00:03:47,208
And what do you want me to do
with "Sonnet to Frying Pan Eyes"?
42
00:03:47,681 --> 00:03:51,310
Let me have it.
I'll put it in the drawer till I get back.
43
00:03:52,085 --> 00:03:55,612
Remember, not a word to Barney
about Fred's present.
44
00:03:56,089 --> 00:04:00,082
You know me. Hear nothing, see nothing.
45
00:04:00,727 --> 00:04:02,422
You forgot something.
46
00:04:02,495 --> 00:04:06,761
Yeah. This is the hard one for me.
Say nothing.
47
00:04:11,838 --> 00:04:14,500
How's about
a game of badminton later on, Fred?
48
00:04:14,574 --> 00:04:16,542
Not tonight, Barney-boy.
49
00:04:16,609 --> 00:04:20,272
I am gonna relax and watch TV.
50
00:04:24,250 --> 00:04:27,185
Thanks for the lift, Barney.
See you in the morning.
51
00:04:35,862 --> 00:04:37,955
Where do you think you're going?
52
00:04:38,031 --> 00:04:40,761
You know I always take a shortcut
through your kitchen.
53
00:04:40,834 --> 00:04:43,132
Tonight you're making a detour.
54
00:04:43,203 --> 00:04:46,400
You're detouring around the icebox.
55
00:04:46,473 --> 00:04:49,567
But, Fred, I always have a little snack
before dinner.
56
00:04:49,642 --> 00:04:54,204
All right, if you want a snack in the snoot
open that icebox, that's all.
57
00:04:54,280 --> 00:04:56,248
Not even a little antipasto?
58
00:04:57,917 --> 00:04:59,976
No antipasto!
59
00:05:05,792 --> 00:05:09,319
That'll teach you a lesson, Fred.
You ought to put your toys away.
60
00:05:09,395 --> 00:05:13,092
What birdbrain left this skate here?
61
00:05:13,500 --> 00:05:15,627
Maybe one of the neighbors' kids?
62
00:05:15,702 --> 00:05:19,160
Yeah. They're always in here
asking Wilma for handouts.
63
00:05:21,508 --> 00:05:25,342
You know, I haven't been on skates
since I was a kid.
64
00:05:25,411 --> 00:05:28,437
And you'd better stop thinking like a kid
and stay off them.
65
00:05:28,515 --> 00:05:31,951
Are you kidding? You think I can't skate?
66
00:05:32,519 --> 00:05:35,352
I wouldn't say that, Fred, but...
67
00:05:35,421 --> 00:05:38,117
Do you belong to some good hospital plan
or something?
68
00:05:38,191 --> 00:05:42,651
No, but keep that up, smart guy,
and you'll need one.
69
00:05:43,363 --> 00:05:48,062
- That's pretty good, Fred.
- I told you there was nothing to it.
70
00:05:48,835 --> 00:05:53,602
- Let's face it. You're a natural-born athlete.
- Yeah, I know.
71
00:05:55,141 --> 00:05:58,872
- You're class, Fred.
- How about this one, Barney?
72
00:05:59,479 --> 00:06:02,971
Champ, how's about letting me try them
for a while?
73
00:06:03,049 --> 00:06:05,813
Forget it. I'm just starting to warm up.
74
00:06:08,855 --> 00:06:11,016
Very fancy, Fred.
75
00:06:18,097 --> 00:06:22,397
- Fred.
- Relax, Barney, I'm okay. Didn't hurt a bit.
76
00:06:22,769 --> 00:06:27,570
- I know. Can I try the skates now?
- No, you can't "try the skates now."
77
00:06:29,909 --> 00:06:32,571
- What's this?
- What's what, Fred?
78
00:06:33,446 --> 00:06:35,414
Wait a minute, will you?
79
00:06:36,549 --> 00:06:38,073
It's terrible.
80
00:06:39,052 --> 00:06:40,144
Terrible.
81
00:06:40,687 --> 00:06:42,985
Here. Read this.
82
00:06:44,791 --> 00:06:46,258
Let's see.
83
00:06:46,326 --> 00:06:49,727
"I love thee, Wilma
With hair like silk
84
00:06:50,296 --> 00:06:53,527
"Lips like cherries
Skin like milk"
85
00:06:57,503 --> 00:07:01,166
"And eyes so black
Like frying pans"
86
00:07:02,342 --> 00:07:04,833
You're right. It is terrible.
87
00:07:06,446 --> 00:07:08,107
Eyes like frying pans?
88
00:07:08,648 --> 00:07:11,742
Couldn't you think of a better rhyme
than that?
89
00:07:11,851 --> 00:07:16,652
- Don't you understand? I didn't write that.
- You didn't?
90
00:07:16,823 --> 00:07:20,224
Do I look like the kind of a guy
who'd write that kind of goop?
91
00:07:20,293 --> 00:07:22,090
Not unless you're lovesick...
92
00:07:22,161 --> 00:07:25,130
and you couldn't be as sick as this
and live.
93
00:07:25,498 --> 00:07:27,898
Then if you didn't write this...
94
00:07:29,969 --> 00:07:33,769
That's it, Barney. There's somebody else.
95
00:07:34,274 --> 00:07:37,471
My Wilma. I can't believe it.
96
00:07:37,543 --> 00:07:40,637
- There now, take it easy.
- Why?
97
00:07:42,181 --> 00:07:44,172
Where have I failed her?
98
00:07:44,450 --> 00:07:47,385
- What did I do wrong?
- I don't know.
99
00:07:47,587 --> 00:07:50,715
Maybe you was too ambitious
to get ahead in the world.
100
00:07:50,790 --> 00:07:52,985
- Maybe you ignored her.
- Yeah.
101
00:07:53,293 --> 00:07:55,193
Leaving her alone every night...
102
00:07:55,261 --> 00:07:58,253
while you travel around the world
on your big business deals.
103
00:07:58,331 --> 00:08:00,799
Yeah. I didn't mean to ignore her.
104
00:08:01,534 --> 00:08:03,661
What big business deals?
105
00:08:07,340 --> 00:08:09,774
I guess I've been watching
too many TV shows.
106
00:08:09,842 --> 00:08:14,040
Funny. I'm losing my wife
and my best friend makes jokes.
107
00:08:15,648 --> 00:08:19,175
That's why she's not home.
She's with him.
108
00:08:19,619 --> 00:08:21,450
The goop writer.
109
00:08:22,322 --> 00:08:24,813
If I ever lay my hands on him...
110
00:08:24,891 --> 00:08:28,327
I'll choke him! I'll bend his head!
111
00:08:31,164 --> 00:08:34,429
It's me! Barney! Cut it out!
112
00:08:36,369 --> 00:08:39,998
I'm sorry, Barney.
I didn't know what I was doing.
113
00:08:41,607 --> 00:08:44,599
Maybe whoever it is
worships Wilma from afar.
114
00:08:44,677 --> 00:08:48,909
After all, Wilma's a very attractive woman.
115
00:08:48,982 --> 00:08:51,314
Oh, yeah? How do you know that?
116
00:08:51,751 --> 00:08:53,878
I'm just married, not dead.
117
00:08:56,656 --> 00:09:00,319
Could be some young squirt.
Like the delivery boy.
118
00:09:00,560 --> 00:09:01,925
That's it.
119
00:09:01,995 --> 00:09:05,192
An impressionable kid
rejected by his mother.
120
00:09:05,264 --> 00:09:06,390
Yeah.
121
00:09:06,866 --> 00:09:10,029
How do you know
he's been rejected by his mother?
122
00:09:10,203 --> 00:09:12,603
I've seen the kid, he's gotta be.
123
00:09:13,006 --> 00:09:14,496
Nice try, pal.
124
00:09:15,375 --> 00:09:19,311
- Did you read the next stanza?
- Nope, but I'll take a look.
125
00:09:21,381 --> 00:09:23,406
I see what you mean, Fred.
126
00:09:24,217 --> 00:09:26,742
"And when you in my arms are in
127
00:09:26,919 --> 00:09:29,012
"My love how can you doubt?
128
00:09:29,288 --> 00:09:31,449
"I quiver just like gelatin
129
00:09:33,059 --> 00:09:35,357
"And sometimes even break out"
130
00:09:35,428 --> 00:09:38,397
That don't sound like worship from afar.
131
00:09:38,631 --> 00:09:41,464
That sounds like worship
from very near to me.
132
00:09:41,534 --> 00:09:42,660
Yeah.
133
00:09:42,735 --> 00:09:45,602
- You know something else I found out?
- No, what?
134
00:09:45,671 --> 00:09:49,573
- Once you learn it, you never forget it.
- What's that, Barney?
135
00:09:49,675 --> 00:09:52,838
- Roller-skating.
- Yeah, I know.
136
00:09:53,646 --> 00:09:58,549
What are you talking about?
Take those skates off, and get out of here!
137
00:09:58,785 --> 00:10:01,310
Look, I'm leaving.
138
00:10:11,264 --> 00:10:12,754
Good evening.
139
00:10:13,366 --> 00:10:16,233
Fred! Why are you sitting in the dark?
140
00:10:16,669 --> 00:10:20,605
Some people spend all their married life
in the dark.
141
00:10:20,673 --> 00:10:23,403
You're mad because I'm late for dinner.
142
00:10:23,709 --> 00:10:26,405
I'm waiting, wife mine.
143
00:10:26,712 --> 00:10:28,680
Dinner will be ready in a minute.
144
00:10:29,048 --> 00:10:31,346
Do you mind warmed-over cactus stew?
145
00:10:31,417 --> 00:10:33,783
Never mind that. Where were you?
146
00:10:35,188 --> 00:10:36,314
Well...
147
00:10:36,389 --> 00:10:39,358
- Well...
- You said that.
148
00:10:40,993 --> 00:10:43,553
I ran into Betty downtown.
149
00:10:44,130 --> 00:10:48,157
- Yeah?
- And we dropped into a movie.
150
00:10:49,869 --> 00:10:51,700
Maybe you'd rather have...
151
00:10:51,771 --> 00:10:55,229
some cold cuts for dinner instead?
152
00:10:55,308 --> 00:10:58,766
- What movie did you see?
- What movie?
153
00:10:58,845 --> 00:11:03,009
Yeah, the name of the picture.
All pictures have names.
154
00:11:03,082 --> 00:11:06,279
Makes it easier
when they hand out Academy Awards.
155
00:11:07,453 --> 00:11:10,320
That's very funny, Fred. You kill me.
156
00:11:10,790 --> 00:11:14,157
First things first. The name?
157
00:11:16,295 --> 00:11:19,162
I don't know. We came in the middle.
158
00:11:19,465 --> 00:11:22,229
Oh, my, I forgot poor Dino's dinner.
159
00:11:22,301 --> 00:11:24,292
Here, Dino. Here, boy.
160
00:11:29,509 --> 00:11:31,272
Here's a nice bone.
161
00:11:34,013 --> 00:11:36,777
Okay, Dino's got his dinner.
162
00:11:37,316 --> 00:11:40,752
So how come you're so late
from seeing half a picture?
163
00:11:43,556 --> 00:11:47,185
They had a double feature, and I didn't see
the name of that one, either.
164
00:11:47,260 --> 00:11:50,320
How can you come
in the middle of both pictures?
165
00:11:50,396 --> 00:11:54,492
- It ain't easy.
- Okay. All right, forget it.
166
00:11:54,867 --> 00:11:58,462
- I'm gonna talk to Barney.
- Good. You run along.
167
00:11:58,538 --> 00:12:01,507
I'll have dinner all fixed
when you get back.
168
00:12:01,974 --> 00:12:03,202
Oh, boy.
169
00:12:06,245 --> 00:12:10,238
Hello, Fred. I'm fixing Barney a TV snack.
Come on in.
170
00:12:10,316 --> 00:12:14,150
- Betty, I wanna talk to you.
- Sure, Fred, what is it?
171
00:12:16,189 --> 00:12:19,386
Get the phone, will you, Fred?
My hands are full.
172
00:12:19,825 --> 00:12:21,554
Yeah. Okay.
173
00:12:23,563 --> 00:12:25,690
Hello, Betty? Wilma.
174
00:12:26,499 --> 00:12:28,933
Now look, don't talk, just listen.
175
00:12:29,402 --> 00:12:32,235
You've got to back me up. It's important.
176
00:12:32,338 --> 00:12:36,274
I told Fred I was with you all afternoon
at the movies.
177
00:12:36,342 --> 00:12:40,039
So if he asks, be a doll,
and follow through for me.
178
00:12:40,313 --> 00:12:43,043
- Okay, Betty?
- Okay, Wilma.
179
00:12:43,883 --> 00:12:46,716
- You got a cold?
- Yes, a cold.
180
00:12:57,730 --> 00:13:00,494
Fred, can you get the phone for me?
181
00:13:01,601 --> 00:13:03,626
I guess he's not back yet.
182
00:13:04,570 --> 00:13:06,765
All right, I'm coming.
183
00:13:08,774 --> 00:13:11,834
Hello. Who?
184
00:13:12,111 --> 00:13:14,636
This is Mr. Slagheap, the jeweler.
185
00:13:14,847 --> 00:13:17,247
I'm calling about
your husband's wristwatch.
186
00:13:17,416 --> 00:13:19,145
The jeweler?
187
00:13:20,253 --> 00:13:21,811
You shouldn't have called.
188
00:13:21,887 --> 00:13:24,151
Suppose my husband
answered the phone?
189
00:13:24,257 --> 00:13:26,657
I'm terribly sorry, Mrs. Flintstone.
190
00:13:26,726 --> 00:13:29,786
I'm just checking the inscription.
Now, that was:
191
00:13:31,664 --> 00:13:36,226
That's right, "darling."
Not "The only man I ever loved"...
192
00:13:36,435 --> 00:13:39,131
"The only man I ever will love."
193
00:13:41,474 --> 00:13:42,907
My own wife.
194
00:13:43,476 --> 00:13:47,810
Don't worry, my dear. I'll rush it
so that you can have it tomorrow.
195
00:13:47,880 --> 00:13:51,509
Thank you. I know
you have so many others waiting.
196
00:13:51,584 --> 00:13:54,451
It's so kind of you to squeeze me in.
197
00:13:54,620 --> 00:13:55,985
Oh, no.
198
00:13:57,056 --> 00:13:59,820
My wife falling for a playboy.
199
00:14:06,432 --> 00:14:09,731
It can't be true, Fred.
Wilma involved with a playboy?
200
00:14:09,902 --> 00:14:12,132
Wilma's different. She's different.
201
00:14:12,204 --> 00:14:16,197
That's a wonderful quality
about you, Barney. Loyalty.
202
00:14:16,609 --> 00:14:19,043
Pure blind loyalty.
203
00:14:19,612 --> 00:14:21,307
Yeah, I know.
204
00:14:21,580 --> 00:14:24,572
Maybe I should have married
somebody like you.
205
00:14:24,917 --> 00:14:27,681
It's too late, Fred. I'm already married.
206
00:14:28,487 --> 00:14:31,081
I didn't mean it that way, waterhead.
207
00:14:31,390 --> 00:14:36,191
And another thing, stop defending Wilma.
I'm the innocent party, get on my side.
208
00:14:36,262 --> 00:14:38,822
I am. And on Wilma's side, too.
209
00:14:38,898 --> 00:14:42,299
She ain't what it looks. I feel it right here.
210
00:14:42,368 --> 00:14:45,769
I heard it here. And I know it here.
211
00:14:46,072 --> 00:14:49,701
And when I find that playboy,
he's gonna get it here.
212
00:14:50,576 --> 00:14:52,100
Fred, watch it!
213
00:15:01,654 --> 00:15:05,647
What's the matter with you, Fred?
We almost had a 7-car accident.
214
00:15:06,759 --> 00:15:08,158
Who cares?
215
00:15:08,527 --> 00:15:10,154
I do. Watch it, will you?
216
00:15:14,600 --> 00:15:19,230
- What're you gonna do here, Fred?
- I ain't gonna brush up on my cha-cha.
217
00:15:20,139 --> 00:15:24,269
Okay, Barney, take over. I'll see you later.
218
00:15:24,343 --> 00:15:27,835
- But, Fred...
- Will you stop yakking and get going?
219
00:15:28,214 --> 00:15:31,206
Okay, Fred, if you wanna be mysterious.
220
00:15:38,090 --> 00:15:39,819
What'll it be, Mac?
221
00:15:41,560 --> 00:15:45,724
- I'm looking for a private eye.
- Yeah?
222
00:15:45,798 --> 00:15:49,325
Maybe you know him? Perry Gunite?
223
00:15:49,502 --> 00:15:52,471
Sure, the daddy of them all.
224
00:15:52,938 --> 00:15:54,337
There he is now.
225
00:16:01,313 --> 00:16:03,975
Yes, sir, Mr. Gunite. What'll it be?
226
00:16:04,183 --> 00:16:05,810
Rocks over rocks.
227
00:16:06,519 --> 00:16:08,783
Yes, sir, coming right up.
228
00:16:09,555 --> 00:16:13,651
- They don't come any tougher.
- Yeah.
229
00:16:13,726 --> 00:16:15,717
- Bartender.
- Yes, sir?
230
00:16:16,195 --> 00:16:18,186
Put that in a dirty glass.
231
00:16:18,831 --> 00:16:20,423
Yes, sir.
232
00:16:20,866 --> 00:16:22,834
You see what I mean?
233
00:16:22,968 --> 00:16:26,335
Yeah. How tough can you get?
234
00:16:29,508 --> 00:16:33,342
Mr. Gunite, can I talk to you?
235
00:16:33,979 --> 00:16:37,210
Business or pleasure?
What's your problem?
236
00:16:37,483 --> 00:16:40,543
- I'm a married man, and I'm miserable.
- Figures.
237
00:16:41,053 --> 00:16:44,420
Some goof's been writing
sickening poetry to my wife.
238
00:16:44,523 --> 00:16:45,512
Figures.
239
00:16:45,591 --> 00:16:48,856
I gotta find out who it is.
You gotta take my case.
240
00:16:49,061 --> 00:16:52,121
We can't talk here.
Come over to my office.
241
00:16:52,665 --> 00:16:53,927
Yes, sir.
242
00:17:01,807 --> 00:17:03,672
We're waiting for you.
243
00:17:05,110 --> 00:17:07,943
I don't know what them private eyes got...
244
00:17:08,013 --> 00:17:12,313
but if they ever put it up in bottles,
they'll make a fortune.
245
00:17:15,254 --> 00:17:18,553
There isn't much money
in this private eye racket...
246
00:17:18,624 --> 00:17:21,491
- it's the fringe benefits.
- Yeah.
247
00:17:27,733 --> 00:17:29,394
Morning, Brigette.
248
00:17:29,735 --> 00:17:32,067
Bonjour, Monsieur Boss.
249
00:17:32,505 --> 00:17:35,565
- My secretary.
- It figures.
250
00:17:35,641 --> 00:17:37,108
Great secretary.
251
00:17:37,176 --> 00:17:40,339
When she first came to work for me,
she was all thumbs.
252
00:17:40,412 --> 00:17:43,142
She ain't all thumbs now.
253
00:17:45,184 --> 00:17:49,917
- Now, you think there's another man?
- I don't think, I know.
254
00:17:49,989 --> 00:17:52,890
He's been sending her icky stuff. Like this.
255
00:17:55,394 --> 00:17:59,228
- It's a shame. A dirty shame.
- You bet.
256
00:17:59,331 --> 00:18:02,630
- A shame I never learned to read.
- Yeah.
257
00:18:02,935 --> 00:18:06,496
I'm not hiring a scholar.
I want you to find this guy.
258
00:18:07,006 --> 00:18:09,338
All right, I'll take the case.
259
00:18:09,742 --> 00:18:12,540
And you're gonna take it
on the chin, buster.
260
00:18:12,611 --> 00:18:16,047
Well, it's Knuckles Stickazora.
261
00:18:16,582 --> 00:18:20,382
Listen, Knuckles,
this town's not big enough for both of us.
262
00:18:20,452 --> 00:18:23,444
I'm giving you 24 hours to get out of town.
263
00:18:23,923 --> 00:18:26,483
Okay, boys, take care of him.
264
00:18:38,137 --> 00:18:41,334
Remember, 24 hours.
265
00:18:45,411 --> 00:18:47,777
I just can't believe that about Wilma.
266
00:18:47,846 --> 00:18:50,940
No, sir, she's just not the type.
267
00:18:51,884 --> 00:18:55,411
I know what I'll do.
I'll go back and talk Wilma out of it.
268
00:18:55,487 --> 00:18:56,715
That's what I'll do.
269
00:19:02,528 --> 00:19:06,760
Fred's gonna love this watch.
Especially the inscription.
270
00:19:09,101 --> 00:19:10,693
That couldn't be Fred.
271
00:19:11,604 --> 00:19:13,936
I better hide this, just in case.
272
00:19:15,908 --> 00:19:17,842
Wilma, you home?
273
00:19:18,611 --> 00:19:20,169
I think so.
274
00:19:20,379 --> 00:19:24,873
- Wilma, I gotta talk to you right away.
- Sure, Barney, come on in.
275
00:19:26,085 --> 00:19:27,643
Thanks, Wilma.
276
00:19:28,320 --> 00:19:31,983
- What're you looking for?
- I'm looking for him.
277
00:19:32,391 --> 00:19:35,952
Him? What him?
There's no him around here.
278
00:19:36,328 --> 00:19:38,956
Fred's out of his mind.
You've gotta leave him.
279
00:19:39,031 --> 00:19:41,431
Fred? But he's my husband.
280
00:19:41,500 --> 00:19:45,527
- Exactly. And he loves you.
- Sure. And I love him.
281
00:19:45,838 --> 00:19:49,330
- Then how could you?
- How could I what?
282
00:19:49,775 --> 00:19:52,335
Wilma, Fred knows, and I know.
283
00:19:52,478 --> 00:19:55,072
Tell me. I'd like to join the club.
284
00:19:55,314 --> 00:19:57,646
Wilma, please be serious.
285
00:20:13,832 --> 00:20:16,562
My wife and my best friend.
286
00:20:16,935 --> 00:20:21,531
As my Chinese compatriot says,
"That's the way the egg rolls."
287
00:20:21,840 --> 00:20:22,932
What'll I do?
288
00:20:23,008 --> 00:20:26,239
There's only one way
to handle a delicate situation like this.
289
00:20:26,311 --> 00:20:30,213
- I'll tear him limb from limb.
- That's the way.
290
00:20:37,456 --> 00:20:38,650
Where to?
291
00:20:38,724 --> 00:20:41,557
To put a little snake in the grass into orbit.
292
00:20:41,627 --> 00:20:43,618
- That's where to.
- Okay.
293
00:20:48,367 --> 00:20:51,962
- How could you do such a thing to Fred?
- Do what to Fred?
294
00:20:52,037 --> 00:20:54,835
Don't pretend. I know how women are.
295
00:20:54,940 --> 00:20:59,240
They all crave excitement, romance.
But not you, Wilma.
296
00:20:59,812 --> 00:21:01,973
Call him, Wilma.
297
00:21:02,047 --> 00:21:04,880
Tell him it was just one of those things.
298
00:21:05,217 --> 00:21:09,381
Tell him that it's all over now.
Do it for Fred.
299
00:21:09,455 --> 00:21:12,356
Wait a minute. Who am I calling?
300
00:21:12,658 --> 00:21:14,956
You know who. The goop writer.
301
00:21:15,427 --> 00:21:17,156
The skunk that wrote:
302
00:21:17,229 --> 00:21:20,164
"Shell-like ears
Dainty hands
303
00:21:20,232 --> 00:21:23,224
"Eyes so black
Like frying pans"
304
00:21:23,736 --> 00:21:26,136
That skunk was Fred.
305
00:21:26,205 --> 00:21:28,503
- Fred?
- Yes, Fred.
306
00:21:28,574 --> 00:21:31,304
He wrote it to me
when we were in high school.
307
00:21:31,376 --> 00:21:34,675
It was so long ago
he must have forgotten he did it.
308
00:21:36,648 --> 00:21:40,709
Wait till Fred finds out
that the other man is himself.
309
00:21:41,787 --> 00:21:46,156
I'm sticking around till he gets home.
We should have a load of laughs.
310
00:21:49,762 --> 00:21:53,926
First thing I'm gonna do
is punch him right in the nose.
311
00:21:54,700 --> 00:21:55,860
Talking to me, sir?
312
00:21:55,934 --> 00:21:58,732
- No, me. Just step on it.
- Right, sir.
313
00:22:04,176 --> 00:22:08,044
"To my darling,
the only man I ever will love.
314
00:22:08,113 --> 00:22:09,740
"From his Wilma."
315
00:22:10,015 --> 00:22:14,714
I guess I'm just as cornball as Fred
when it comes to writing poetry.
316
00:22:14,953 --> 00:22:18,787
I think it's beautiful.
It'll get Fred right here.
317
00:22:19,324 --> 00:22:23,158
- The watch. It fell under the couch.
- I hope it didn't break.
318
00:22:23,462 --> 00:22:26,090
Don't worry. I see it, way in the back.
319
00:22:30,736 --> 00:22:34,399
Wait a minute. Why should I act primitive?
320
00:22:35,107 --> 00:22:37,337
Barney's a sweet little guy...
321
00:22:37,843 --> 00:22:40,073
even though I can't trust him.
322
00:22:40,212 --> 00:22:43,306
After all, we're adults, civilized.
323
00:22:44,016 --> 00:22:48,009
I'll wish them the best,
and if the best man has won...
324
00:22:48,654 --> 00:22:50,281
c'est la guerre.
325
00:22:50,455 --> 00:22:53,822
I'll be cool, calm. I'll even laugh.
326
00:22:56,628 --> 00:22:59,495
Fred, I didn't expect you so early.
327
00:22:59,832 --> 00:23:02,596
Good evening, my dear little wife.
328
00:23:04,636 --> 00:23:08,470
Get out from under that couch,
you homewrecker!
329
00:23:08,540 --> 00:23:12,909
- It's no use hiding, you little lizard!
- Are you off your rocker?
330
00:23:12,978 --> 00:23:16,141
Fred, I wanna talk to you.
331
00:23:16,215 --> 00:23:19,275
Why talk?
Maybe you'd rather hear some poetry.
332
00:23:19,484 --> 00:23:23,113
"Eyes so black
Like frying pans"
333
00:23:24,423 --> 00:23:27,915
- You've got nothing to worry about.
- I know. Not a thing, pal.
334
00:23:27,993 --> 00:23:32,453
Silly old me. I've been worrying
my fool head off over this.
335
00:23:33,699 --> 00:23:35,599
When was that taken?
336
00:23:35,667 --> 00:23:39,296
This afternoon
when you were supposed to be working.
337
00:23:39,371 --> 00:23:41,566
Yes, and instead he was over here...
338
00:23:41,640 --> 00:23:45,167
trying to get me to give up
the author of that corny poetry...
339
00:23:45,244 --> 00:23:47,109
who happens to be you.
340
00:23:48,447 --> 00:23:50,381
- Me?
- Yes, you.
341
00:23:50,449 --> 00:23:52,474
I've got a box full of that stuff.
342
00:23:52,551 --> 00:23:55,645
Yeah. You wrote it
when you was in high school.
343
00:23:56,822 --> 00:24:00,724
- I wrote it?
- You did. You also wrote:
344
00:24:00,792 --> 00:24:03,625
"You're a perfect peach, my love
345
00:24:03,695 --> 00:24:05,890
"Together we're a pair"
346
00:24:05,964 --> 00:24:08,990
"You're sweet, you're nice
347
00:24:09,635 --> 00:24:11,262
"You're paradise
348
00:24:11,737 --> 00:24:14,968
"And all kind of stuff like that there"
349
00:24:15,807 --> 00:24:18,298
Yeah, I remember.
350
00:24:18,543 --> 00:24:23,207
And even though you don't deserve it,
here's your birthday present.
351
00:24:24,416 --> 00:24:25,849
"To my darling...
352
00:24:26,551 --> 00:24:29,179
"the only man I ever will love.
353
00:24:30,055 --> 00:24:31,716
"From his Wilma."
354
00:24:33,692 --> 00:24:36,058
Wilma, honey, I'm sorry.
355
00:24:36,128 --> 00:24:40,121
I've been a jealous fool, a skunk, a nut.
356
00:24:40,198 --> 00:24:43,099
Who's arguing with you, you big dope?
357
00:24:43,435 --> 00:24:45,335
So long, you lovebirds.
358
00:24:46,939 --> 00:24:50,340
- Will you ever forgive me?
- I don't know why I should.
359
00:24:50,409 --> 00:24:52,434
Please, one more chance.
360
00:24:52,778 --> 00:24:55,542
Before I do, if I do...
361
00:24:55,881 --> 00:24:59,112
I wanna know one thing, Fred Flintstone.
362
00:24:59,184 --> 00:25:03,746
What? Anything. Ask me. Go ahead.
363
00:25:04,022 --> 00:25:06,957
Ask me. What?
364
00:25:07,659 --> 00:25:11,959
Do I still have eyes
as black as frying pans?
365
00:25:12,431 --> 00:25:14,831
You sure do, honey.
366
00:25:16,969 --> 00:25:19,563
You sure do.
367
00:26:02,347 --> 00:26:03,336
Wilma.
368
00:26:09,021 --> 00:26:11,251
Come on, Wilma, open this door!
28395
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