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1
00:00:09,881 --> 00:00:12,342
You really gonna leave
all this for business school?
2
00:00:12,367 --> 00:00:13,552
I was thinkin' about it.
3
00:00:13,577 --> 00:00:14,928
Well, don't.
4
00:00:14,953 --> 00:00:16,747
The best is yet to come.
5
00:00:16,772 --> 00:00:18,231
Hey, honey, I'm home.
6
00:00:18,256 --> 00:00:20,269
You know, I was thinking
about you and Bambi,
7
00:00:20,317 --> 00:00:21,861
seeing you two
together like that...
8
00:00:21,886 --> 00:00:22,994
Like what?
9
00:00:23,019 --> 00:00:24,729
But she came to, um...
10
00:00:24,780 --> 00:00:26,907
Over to, uh, borrow this bra.
11
00:00:27,011 --> 00:00:28,091
- Oh, yes.
- Mm-hmm.
12
00:00:28,116 --> 00:00:30,343
I lost mine in a well.
13
00:00:30,368 --> 00:00:31,661
Constance Papadopoulos.
14
00:00:31,686 --> 00:00:32,930
- I love it.
- I pitched her
15
00:00:32,954 --> 00:00:34,164
on investing in Bottom Dollar.
16
00:00:34,189 --> 00:00:36,291
No, look, she's-she's
retired from shipping.
17
00:00:36,316 --> 00:00:38,061
She... no. She has zero
publishing experience.
18
00:00:38,085 --> 00:00:39,711
I just hear "deep pockets
19
00:00:39,736 --> 00:00:42,022
with no big ideas of what
to do with a magazine."
20
00:00:42,047 --> 00:00:43,381
Why didn't I think of that?
21
00:00:43,446 --> 00:00:45,108
You don't have to.
That's why you got me.
22
00:00:45,133 --> 00:00:46,968
Maybe I have one
good chapter left.
23
00:00:47,135 --> 00:00:49,513
I cannot believe he was right.
24
00:00:49,538 --> 00:00:52,074
Yes, he
was. But do we need him?
25
00:01:08,615 --> 00:01:10,659
♪ Well, you
can bump And grind... ♪
26
00:01:12,661 --> 00:01:15,247
♪ It's good for your mind ♪
27
00:01:15,413 --> 00:01:16,915
♪ Well, you... ♪
28
00:01:17,082 --> 00:01:18,834
Now this is what I
call a comeback, huh?
29
00:01:19,000 --> 00:01:21,253
Yeah, baby.
30
00:01:21,419 --> 00:01:23,463
♪ No, you won't fool ♪
31
00:01:23,630 --> 00:01:26,091
♪ The children Of
the revolution ♪
32
00:01:27,800 --> 00:01:30,720
When I bought this
company three weeks ago,
33
00:01:30,887 --> 00:01:33,515
this is exactly the kind
of cultural happening
34
00:01:33,681 --> 00:01:35,225
that I hoped to
become a part of.
35
00:01:35,392 --> 00:01:38,728
And I have this man
and his global vision
36
00:01:38,895 --> 00:01:41,022
to thank for pulling me out
of a premature retirement
37
00:01:41,189 --> 00:01:44,234
and hosting this historic event.
38
00:01:44,401 --> 00:01:47,404
You know, a lot of
people counted us out.
39
00:01:47,571 --> 00:01:51,700
But we are back, and
we are better than ever
40
00:01:51,867 --> 00:01:53,618
with the hottest new movie
41
00:01:53,785 --> 00:01:56,204
to launch the hottest
new company, BDP.
42
00:01:56,371 --> 00:01:58,247
Remember that name.
43
00:01:58,415 --> 00:02:00,584
We're becoming a
major player in media.
44
00:02:00,750 --> 00:02:02,502
And, sure, Minx is our flagship,
45
00:02:02,669 --> 00:02:05,881
but we're gonna be so much
more than just one magazine.
46
00:02:06,047 --> 00:02:08,133
I'm CFO, chief fun officer.
47
00:02:08,300 --> 00:02:10,427
And I'm art director,
which is an actual title.
48
00:02:10,594 --> 00:02:12,429
We're building a catalog
of new magazines.
49
00:02:12,596 --> 00:02:14,680
Hosting fancy parties
like this one.
50
00:02:14,848 --> 00:02:16,242
There might even
be some merchandise
51
00:02:16,266 --> 00:02:17,702
coming your way.
52
00:02:17,726 --> 00:02:19,436
You said you wanted splashy.
53
00:02:19,603 --> 00:02:21,414
- Is this splashy enough?
- Well, it's a beginning.
54
00:02:21,438 --> 00:02:23,148
Where's our star
editor? Not here yet?
55
00:02:23,315 --> 00:02:24,435
Oh, Joyce? Uh, she's coming.
56
00:02:24,524 --> 00:02:25,567
She loves red carpets.
57
00:02:25,733 --> 00:02:26,985
She absolutely loves them.
58
00:02:31,781 --> 00:02:33,467
Faith not
filth. Faith not filth.
59
00:02:33,491 --> 00:02:36,077
Faith not filth.
Faith not filth!
60
00:02:36,244 --> 00:02:38,413
Whoo! Yeah.
61
00:02:47,839 --> 00:02:49,466
- Hello!
- Where were you?
62
00:02:49,633 --> 00:02:51,635
Oh, sorry.
The 101 was crazy.
63
00:02:51,801 --> 00:02:53,279
No, it wasn't. That's
how we got here.
64
00:02:53,303 --> 00:02:55,096
Okay, fine. I was writing
my editor's letter.
65
00:02:55,263 --> 00:02:56,741
A fine thank-you for giving
her the bigger office.
66
00:02:56,765 --> 00:02:57,891
They're the same size.
67
00:02:58,058 --> 00:02:59,410
The glass creates
an optical illusion.
68
00:02:59,434 --> 00:03:00,786
- They are not.
- Look, it's
69
00:03:00,810 --> 00:03:01,871
the first issue
with the new owner.
70
00:03:01,895 --> 00:03:03,813
I wanted to make the
right statement, okay?
71
00:03:03,980 --> 00:03:07,984
And, um, speaking of, are
we sure that Deep Throat
72
00:03:08,151 --> 00:03:10,153
is really putting our
best foot forward?
73
00:03:10,320 --> 00:03:11,964
Oh, I think so. It's a
really feminist tale.
74
00:03:11,988 --> 00:03:13,466
It's about a woman
searching for an orgasm.
75
00:03:13,490 --> 00:03:15,367
Yeah, which she
finds via a clitoris
76
00:03:15,533 --> 00:03:17,994
conveniently located
inside of her mouth?
77
00:03:18,161 --> 00:03:19,347
It's always in the
last place you look.
78
00:03:20,956 --> 00:03:22,249
This is our big launch, Joycey,
79
00:03:22,415 --> 00:03:23,708
just smile and
make us look good.
80
00:03:23,875 --> 00:03:25,102
- Have a little fun.
- All right.
81
00:03:25,126 --> 00:03:26,461
This is a big win for us.
82
00:03:26,628 --> 00:03:27,837
- Yeah.
- Oh, my gosh,
83
00:03:28,004 --> 00:03:29,315
there are so many
fabulous people here.
84
00:03:29,339 --> 00:03:30,566
Any new names on
the, uh, guest list?
85
00:03:30,590 --> 00:03:33,843
Red Buttons, the Alans...
Alda and Arkin...
86
00:03:34,010 --> 00:03:35,321
And, you're never
gonna believe this,
87
00:03:35,345 --> 00:03:36,888
Warren frickin' Beatty.
88
00:03:37,055 --> 00:03:38,682
Connie's gonna love this.
89
00:03:38,848 --> 00:03:40,408
Porn has gone mainstream.
We should have
90
00:03:40,475 --> 00:03:41,675
- an after-party, right?
- Yes.
91
00:03:41,768 --> 00:03:42,745
- No. No.
- Yes, let's do
92
00:03:42,769 --> 00:03:44,019
- an after-party.
- God no.
93
00:03:44,187 --> 00:03:46,040
The second this is over,
I'm at home in the bath.
94
00:03:46,064 --> 00:03:47,250
Joan Didion has a new
piece in the Paris Review.
95
00:03:47,274 --> 00:03:48,817
I've been saving it.
96
00:03:48,983 --> 00:03:51,194
- It's 7,000 words, no pictures.
- It's a quick read.
97
00:03:52,821 --> 00:03:53,881
Rich, go
take some photos.
98
00:03:53,905 --> 00:03:55,198
Bambs, mingle.
99
00:03:55,365 --> 00:03:56,925
When you see Warren
Beatty, let me know.
100
00:03:56,992 --> 00:03:58,994
- I wanna meet him.
- Definitely.
101
00:03:59,160 --> 00:04:00,161
What about me?
102
00:04:00,328 --> 00:04:01,913
You're management, baby.
103
00:04:02,080 --> 00:04:03,599
You're not lifting a finger.
You just enjoy your night.
104
00:04:03,623 --> 00:04:07,002
Well, we are certainly a
long way from Seneca Falls.
105
00:04:07,168 --> 00:04:08,378
Yeah.
106
00:04:08,545 --> 00:04:09,689
Come
have a drink with me.
107
00:04:09,713 --> 00:04:11,148
- With pleasure.
- You guys have fun.
108
00:04:11,172 --> 00:04:12,757
We will. Nice
cane, by the way.
109
00:04:12,924 --> 00:04:14,443
It's a walking stick.
Churchill had one.
110
00:04:14,467 --> 00:04:15,635
So did Willy Wonka.
111
00:04:15,802 --> 00:04:17,470
Oh, let him have his moment.
112
00:04:17,637 --> 00:04:19,347
Poor man already feels
like an appendage.
113
00:04:19,514 --> 00:04:20,765
- Mr. Renetti...
- What?
114
00:04:20,932 --> 00:04:22,159
...I'm Timmy,
the projectionist.
115
00:04:22,183 --> 00:04:23,435
Okay.
116
00:04:23,601 --> 00:04:25,186
Sorry, sir,
we have a problem.
117
00:04:25,353 --> 00:04:26,604
Deep Throat is missing.
118
00:04:34,321 --> 00:04:37,115
♪ Uhn, ahh ♪
119
00:04:38,325 --> 00:04:40,702
Okay.
120
00:04:40,869 --> 00:04:42,245
Why are you freakin'
me out, Timmy?
121
00:04:42,412 --> 00:04:44,956
- They're right here.
- Yes, the canisters.
122
00:04:45,123 --> 00:04:46,333
Okay?
123
00:04:48,793 --> 00:04:50,211
What am I lookin' at here?
124
00:04:50,378 --> 00:04:52,005
That's Bedknobs and Broomsticks,
125
00:04:52,172 --> 00:04:54,174
a five-time Academy Award
nominated musical fantasy
126
00:04:54,341 --> 00:04:56,051
set during World War II.
127
00:04:56,217 --> 00:04:57,862
Three adorable moppets
are placed in the care
128
00:04:57,886 --> 00:04:59,806
of an apprentice witch
played by Angela Lansbury.
129
00:04:59,888 --> 00:05:01,639
Apprentice? The woman's
nearly 70 years old.
130
00:05:01,806 --> 00:05:02,992
Miss Lansbury's
131
00:05:03,016 --> 00:05:04,726
in her early 40s.
132
00:05:04,893 --> 00:05:06,173
She just has one of those faces.
133
00:05:06,269 --> 00:05:07,937
Well, unless somebody
comes on that face
134
00:05:08,104 --> 00:05:09,272
in the second act,
135
00:05:09,439 --> 00:05:11,191
this audience is
gonna eat me alive.
136
00:05:11,358 --> 00:05:12,442
What can I say, Doug?
137
00:05:12,609 --> 00:05:14,027
My old lady made
me hire her son.
138
00:05:14,194 --> 00:05:16,780
He's a fuckin' moron.
139
00:05:16,946 --> 00:05:18,865
Yeah, Dwight, I'm
talkin' about you.
140
00:05:19,032 --> 00:05:20,926
Aw, you really fucked me
on this one, you know that?
141
00:05:20,950 --> 00:05:22,230
You think
you got it bad?
142
00:05:22,284 --> 00:05:23,554
I'd hate to be at
that birthday party
143
00:05:23,578 --> 00:05:24,537
in Palos Verdes.
144
00:05:24,704 --> 00:05:25,705
I'm gonna slide
145
00:05:25,872 --> 00:05:27,749
up and down the banister.
146
00:05:27,916 --> 00:05:29,793
I thought the bed was gonna fly.
147
00:05:29,959 --> 00:05:31,669
I guess you could
drive over there.
148
00:05:31,836 --> 00:05:32,996
It's a two-hour drive.
149
00:05:33,129 --> 00:05:34,589
Jesus fucking Christ.
150
00:05:34,756 --> 00:05:36,091
I have a theater full of people.
151
00:05:36,257 --> 00:05:37,384
My boss is here.
152
00:05:37,550 --> 00:05:39,844
You are in luck.
153
00:05:40,010 --> 00:05:42,097
There's another copy
of the film nearby.
154
00:05:42,263 --> 00:05:43,598
Bob Evans been sittin' on it.
155
00:05:43,765 --> 00:05:45,045
Who the
hell is Bob Evans?
156
00:05:45,100 --> 00:05:46,243
He's some
Hollywood hotshot,
157
00:05:46,267 --> 00:05:47,495
and I think he
did The Godfather.
158
00:05:47,519 --> 00:05:48,579
Here, give me that.
Give me that. Come here.
159
00:05:48,603 --> 00:05:50,003
- Director?
- Uh, no.
160
00:05:50,146 --> 00:05:51,207
- Writer?
- I-I don't know.
161
00:05:51,231 --> 00:05:53,274
All I know is, he's been
spankin' it to this movie
162
00:05:53,441 --> 00:05:54,960
- for two weeks straight.
- Ali MacGraw
163
00:05:54,984 --> 00:05:56,796
left him for Steve McQueen.
Cut the guy some slack.
164
00:05:56,820 --> 00:05:58,255
Doug, what the
hell are we doin'?
165
00:05:58,279 --> 00:06:00,240
It's 30 minutes there.
It's 30 minutes back.
166
00:06:00,407 --> 00:06:01,884
Please... I'll-I'll
vamp for the crowd.
167
00:06:01,908 --> 00:06:03,201
Just please do this for me.
168
00:06:03,743 --> 00:06:04,702
Thomas Guide?
169
00:06:04,869 --> 00:06:06,121
It's in the back seat.
170
00:06:06,287 --> 00:06:08,248
And, please, easy on the brakes.
171
00:06:08,415 --> 00:06:10,667
It's a very expensive car.
172
00:06:10,834 --> 00:06:11,936
Thank you, guys. I
love you, I love you,
173
00:06:11,960 --> 00:06:13,461
I love you.
174
00:06:21,344 --> 00:06:22,613
- Everything all right?
- Oh, with me?
175
00:06:22,637 --> 00:06:24,180
Fantastic. Thank
you for asking.
176
00:06:29,619 --> 00:06:31,121
Who's that? Who's that?
177
00:06:31,146 --> 00:06:33,206
- Hmm?
- Who was that?
178
00:06:33,231 --> 00:06:34,911
- I don't know. Is he famous?
- Hi!
179
00:06:34,936 --> 00:06:35,934
- Hey.
- I didn't think you guys
180
00:06:35,959 --> 00:06:37,227
were gonna show.
181
00:06:37,252 --> 00:06:38,503
Yeah, me neither,
182
00:06:38,528 --> 00:06:40,290
especially after I buried
the first invitation
183
00:06:40,315 --> 00:06:42,132
at the bottom of the trash can.
184
00:06:42,157 --> 00:06:43,342
But then the second
one showed up
185
00:06:43,366 --> 00:06:44,815
and this one got
his hands on it,
186
00:06:44,840 --> 00:06:46,048
so here we are.
187
00:06:46,073 --> 00:06:47,762
This scene is wild.
188
00:06:47,787 --> 00:06:49,181
You know what? I am.
189
00:06:49,205 --> 00:06:50,307
I'm gonna unbutton
the second button.
190
00:06:50,331 --> 00:06:51,783
- Yes, fun.
- No, no, no.
191
00:06:51,808 --> 00:06:52,917
You have that eczema patch.
192
00:06:52,942 --> 00:06:54,353
Oh, just put the chain
over it. It'll be foxy.
193
00:06:54,377 --> 00:06:56,187
No, no, no.
I got it. I got it.
194
00:06:56,212 --> 00:06:57,273
I got it. It's okay.
195
00:06:57,297 --> 00:06:58,337
That's perfect. Thank you.
196
00:06:58,378 --> 00:06:59,983
You guys, drinkies.
197
00:07:00,008 --> 00:07:01,318
I'm Chief Fun
Offering my services.
198
00:07:01,342 --> 00:07:03,344
Um, uh, two Jack and Cokes,
199
00:07:03,511 --> 00:07:04,780
unless you have
anything stronger.
200
00:07:04,804 --> 00:07:06,181
Um, I'll see what they have.
201
00:07:06,347 --> 00:07:07,640
- Mm-hmm.
- Oh, my God.
202
00:07:07,807 --> 00:07:09,058
Thank God you're here.
203
00:07:09,225 --> 00:07:10,494
You can keep me company
at this bacchanal.
204
00:07:10,518 --> 00:07:13,229
Is that... uh, is that...
205
00:07:13,396 --> 00:07:15,040
is that... no, don't...
Is it Telly Savalas?
206
00:07:15,064 --> 00:07:16,167
That could
be any bald head.
207
00:07:16,191 --> 00:07:17,460
No, no.
Look at the gleam.
208
00:07:17,484 --> 00:07:18,764
That's him. That's
Telly Savalas.
209
00:07:18,902 --> 00:07:20,379
- I know it.
- God, the Lamberts
210
00:07:20,403 --> 00:07:21,529
at Deep Throat.
211
00:07:21,696 --> 00:07:23,198
What is the world coming to?
212
00:07:23,364 --> 00:07:25,533
Well, this film is the talk
of the dental community.
213
00:07:25,700 --> 00:07:27,619
Yeah, if that smug Peter
Strom wants to brag
214
00:07:27,784 --> 00:07:30,246
about his porcelain veneers
again, then I'm gonna say,
215
00:07:30,413 --> 00:07:32,093
"Oh, really? Well,
guess what I got to see.
216
00:07:32,123 --> 00:07:33,374
I got to see"... Yul Brynner.
217
00:07:33,541 --> 00:07:34,751
- Oh, is it?
- I knew
218
00:07:34,918 --> 00:07:35,936
- it was a celebrity skull.
- I do like Yul.
219
00:07:38,171 --> 00:07:39,523
Now the movie's gonna
start and I didn't say hi.
220
00:07:39,547 --> 00:07:41,216
Uh, you can talk to him after.
221
00:07:41,382 --> 00:07:42,276
- Shall we do this?
- Maybe we're sitting
222
00:07:42,300 --> 00:07:43,551
- by him.
- All right...
223
00:07:43,718 --> 00:07:44,778
- Are we sitting by him?
- No, we're
224
00:07:44,802 --> 00:07:45,821
definitely not. We're
not seated by him.
225
00:07:45,845 --> 00:07:47,406
- How do you know?
- Please don't. Please don't.
226
00:07:47,430 --> 00:07:49,265
That's such a
snazzy jacket, Lenny.
227
00:07:49,432 --> 00:07:50,910
Thank you.
228
00:07:50,934 --> 00:07:52,614
I don't get to, uh,
trot it out very often,
229
00:07:52,727 --> 00:07:53,704
- but...
- You know what?
230
00:07:53,728 --> 00:07:54,896
Let's be close to the aisle.
231
00:07:55,063 --> 00:07:56,523
- Okay. Ooh.
- Yeah?
232
00:07:56,689 --> 00:07:57,666
- You want me to go...
- Oh, that's so cute.
233
00:07:57,690 --> 00:07:58,918
Your bladder's
the size of a pea.
234
00:07:58,942 --> 00:08:00,294
- Uh, Joyce...
- Yeah.
235
00:08:00,318 --> 00:08:01,629
You know what?
You need to sit here.
236
00:08:01,653 --> 00:08:03,255
- We have sister business.
- Oh, okay.
237
00:08:03,279 --> 00:08:04,447
Prigger! Joyce!
238
00:08:04,614 --> 00:08:06,074
Can I talk to you
for a second? Now?
239
00:08:07,450 --> 00:08:08,760
I'm so sorry, Bambi.
240
00:08:08,784 --> 00:08:10,328
Okay. Yup.
241
00:08:10,495 --> 00:08:11,913
Okay. Sorry. Excuse us.
242
00:08:12,080 --> 00:08:14,123
Sorry.
243
00:08:14,290 --> 00:08:15,970
- Just scootch that on over.
- Oh.
244
00:08:16,084 --> 00:08:17,061
Okay,
what do you think?
245
00:08:17,085 --> 00:08:18,419
Popcorn, nachos, dog of corn?
246
00:08:18,586 --> 00:08:20,713
Oh, uh, nachos, please.
247
00:08:20,880 --> 00:08:22,715
I have seen popcorn
hulls get jammed
248
00:08:22,881 --> 00:08:24,092
right up into the gumline.
249
00:08:24,259 --> 00:08:26,010
- Yeah.
- Your job is so interesting.
250
00:08:26,177 --> 00:08:27,804
Oh.
251
00:08:27,971 --> 00:08:29,240
Do you judge people
when they get cavities,
252
00:08:29,264 --> 00:08:31,224
or is it nice to feel needed?
253
00:08:31,390 --> 00:08:33,184
Well, is it crazy if I say
254
00:08:33,351 --> 00:08:35,111
it's a little bit of both?
255
00:08:35,228 --> 00:08:37,272
No.
256
00:08:37,438 --> 00:08:38,499
No, well, that's
what I was saying...
257
00:08:38,523 --> 00:08:39,941
Oh, no.
258
00:08:40,108 --> 00:08:41,868
Something gone awry with
your mob-distributed
259
00:08:41,985 --> 00:08:43,653
- illegal film?
- Okay, listen, Joyce,
260
00:08:43,820 --> 00:08:45,548
I-I might have to get up
there and vamp a little bit
261
00:08:45,572 --> 00:08:47,657
for the crowd, and-and-and
I might pull you up, okay?
262
00:08:47,824 --> 00:08:49,468
And I'm gonna need you,
if you get up there,
263
00:08:49,492 --> 00:08:51,095
to talk about the...
Kind of the lady Minx
264
00:08:51,119 --> 00:08:52,137
perspective of the movie
to keep people going.
265
00:08:52,161 --> 00:08:53,347
All right, the Minx
perspective is gonna
266
00:08:53,371 --> 00:08:55,540
be quite happy in her seat,
eating Nonpareils, okay?
267
00:08:56,332 --> 00:08:57,434
- Want one?
- No, I don't want a Nonpareil.
268
00:08:57,458 --> 00:08:59,085
Those are disgusting.
269
00:09:00,503 --> 00:09:02,714
Fuck.
270
00:09:06,509 --> 00:09:08,386
What?
271
00:09:08,553 --> 00:09:09,846
We're here
for the reels.
272
00:09:12,849 --> 00:09:14,249
No. Not Lady
Sings the Blues.
273
00:09:14,392 --> 00:09:17,103
Deep Throat.
274
00:09:17,270 --> 00:09:19,397
Okay, thank you. You too.
275
00:09:20,607 --> 00:09:23,192
- Kevin's coming down.
- If you say so.
276
00:09:23,359 --> 00:09:25,945
Welcome, everybody,
to the biggest and baddest
277
00:09:26,112 --> 00:09:28,990
social event of 1973.
278
00:09:32,242 --> 00:09:34,370
This movie is too hot
for New York City.
279
00:09:34,537 --> 00:09:36,205
They couldn't handle it.
280
00:09:36,372 --> 00:09:38,499
Chicago couldn't handle it.
281
00:09:38,666 --> 00:09:40,501
But this is LA, baby.
282
00:09:40,668 --> 00:09:44,714
Can we handle it?
283
00:09:44,881 --> 00:09:46,424
Oh.
284
00:09:51,137 --> 00:09:53,806
But first, I wanna introduce
285
00:09:53,973 --> 00:09:56,476
Minx's own Joyce Prigger.
286
00:09:56,643 --> 00:09:58,853
Come on up, Joycey.
287
00:09:59,896 --> 00:10:01,256
You're gonna love
her. I know I do.
288
00:10:01,314 --> 00:10:03,358
Get up, Joycey.
289
00:10:03,524 --> 00:10:05,902
Joyce! Joyce!
Joyce! Joyce! Joyce!
290
00:10:06,069 --> 00:10:08,905
Joyce! Joyce! Whoo!
291
00:10:09,072 --> 00:10:11,240
Whoo!
292
00:10:11,407 --> 00:10:13,618
Surely we can work
something out, guys.
293
00:10:13,785 --> 00:10:15,745
Shutting this down seems
to be an extreme reaction
294
00:10:15,912 --> 00:10:17,038
to this situation.
295
00:10:17,205 --> 00:10:18,748
You placed ads on billboards.
296
00:10:18,915 --> 00:10:20,155
You got those drive time idiots
297
00:10:20,208 --> 00:10:21,709
to yammer about it on the radio.
298
00:10:21,876 --> 00:10:23,920
Then you wave your klieg
lights across the city
299
00:10:24,087 --> 00:10:25,887
for a movie that's banned
in half the country.
300
00:10:26,005 --> 00:10:27,256
You tied the DA's hands.
301
00:10:27,423 --> 00:10:30,343
Friends, you're
killin' me right now.
302
00:10:30,510 --> 00:10:31,928
As we're all aware,
303
00:10:32,095 --> 00:10:35,098
Michelangelo was repulsed
by the female form.
304
00:10:35,264 --> 00:10:37,642
Um... uh...
305
00:10:37,809 --> 00:10:40,103
Uh, his greatest depictions...
306
00:10:40,269 --> 00:10:43,439
were of virginal,
untouched Mary.
307
00:10:48,528 --> 00:10:50,154
Uh...
308
00:10:50,321 --> 00:10:51,739
Have you guys seen the movie?
309
00:10:51,906 --> 00:10:53,825
It's more arthouse
than it is porn.
310
00:10:53,991 --> 00:10:55,260
You know what it's
about? It's about a woman
311
00:10:55,284 --> 00:10:56,804
- searching for pleasure...
- Mr. Renetti,
312
00:10:56,828 --> 00:10:58,287
this is not a negotiation.
313
00:10:58,454 --> 00:10:59,682
If a single frame of Deep Throat
314
00:10:59,706 --> 00:11:00,998
hits that screen,
315
00:11:01,165 --> 00:11:04,419
we're gonna arrest
you and everyone here.
316
00:11:07,130 --> 00:11:09,382
You guys really know how to rain
317
00:11:09,549 --> 00:11:11,634
on someone's parade,
you know that?
318
00:11:11,801 --> 00:11:13,237
I just don't know
what I'm gonna tell
319
00:11:13,261 --> 00:11:14,530
all those people in the theater.
320
00:11:14,554 --> 00:11:15,906
I got no Deep Throat
now 'cause of you.
321
00:11:15,930 --> 00:11:17,473
Well, better you say it here
322
00:11:17,640 --> 00:11:19,040
than from the inside
of a jail cell.
323
00:11:21,561 --> 00:11:22,996
Good
night, Mr. Renetti.
324
00:11:23,020 --> 00:11:25,690
I got egg all
over my face, officers.
325
00:11:25,857 --> 00:11:27,775
You win again.
326
00:11:27,942 --> 00:11:29,360
I lose again.
327
00:11:29,527 --> 00:11:31,028
Thanks for nothin', officers.
328
00:11:36,284 --> 00:11:38,786
Deep dish pizza,
329
00:11:38,953 --> 00:11:41,456
a lake as big as an ocean,
330
00:11:41,622 --> 00:11:42,683
- the Cubbies...
- Is that a haiku?
331
00:11:42,707 --> 00:11:44,625
No.
332
00:11:44,792 --> 00:11:46,169
I was just listing
all the things
333
00:11:46,335 --> 00:11:47,815
that you missed out
on by turning down
334
00:11:47,962 --> 00:11:50,506
- the University of Chicago.
- Don't start.
335
00:11:50,673 --> 00:11:52,425
Running Minx is my
business school.
336
00:11:52,592 --> 00:11:55,094
Tina, you're not running
Minx. You're running errands.
337
00:11:55,261 --> 00:11:57,638
Doug can distract us with
all the new titles he wants,
338
00:11:57,805 --> 00:12:00,349
but we're still his gofers.
339
00:12:00,516 --> 00:12:03,269
Oh.
340
00:12:03,436 --> 00:12:04,687
There's supposed to be six.
341
00:12:04,854 --> 00:12:06,094
Yeah. Bob
wanted to give
342
00:12:06,230 --> 00:12:07,732
the last three one more viewing.
343
00:12:07,899 --> 00:12:09,168
- He's had it for a week.
- I don't know, man.
344
00:12:09,192 --> 00:12:10,544
The engagement
sequence cheers him up.
345
00:12:10,568 --> 00:12:11,837
All right, I'll drive
back with the first set.
346
00:12:11,861 --> 00:12:13,005
You stay and take a
cab with the rest.
347
00:12:13,029 --> 00:12:13,863
Wha...
348
00:12:15,114 --> 00:12:17,200
Oh, Porn Schlepping 101.
I love that MBA program.
349
00:12:18,743 --> 00:12:20,745
Is that grass?
350
00:12:20,912 --> 00:12:22,622
No.
351
00:12:28,169 --> 00:12:29,688
- Do you have 'em?
- Yes.
352
00:12:29,712 --> 00:12:30,755
Yes.
353
00:12:32,673 --> 00:12:34,592
Oh, Tina, hallelujah.
354
00:12:36,385 --> 00:12:37,446
Tell me you weren't
ridin' the brakes
355
00:12:37,470 --> 00:12:38,470
like that the whole time.
356
00:12:38,513 --> 00:12:39,753
Would you quit worrying?
357
00:12:39,889 --> 00:12:41,325
You kill the
brakes when you do that.
358
00:12:41,349 --> 00:12:43,309
Uh, very good guess, but
no, that is the perineum.
359
00:12:45,478 --> 00:12:48,689
Warren, for the 12th time,
I know you know, all right?
360
00:12:48,856 --> 00:12:52,401
We all know you now. Right?
361
00:12:52,568 --> 00:12:55,863
Gentlemen, does any
man in this room
362
00:12:56,030 --> 00:12:59,075
besides Warren
Beatty over there,
363
00:12:59,242 --> 00:13:01,494
know where the clitoris
is on a female body?
364
00:13:01,661 --> 00:13:03,371
Absolutely not.
365
00:13:03,538 --> 00:13:04,872
Yes, good sir.
366
00:13:05,039 --> 00:13:07,250
The little nubbin
under the beret.
367
00:13:07,416 --> 00:13:10,044
Ew. Jeez.
368
00:13:10,211 --> 00:13:12,296
But yes. Yes, yes.
369
00:13:12,463 --> 00:13:14,298
It's the nubbin.
370
00:13:14,465 --> 00:13:16,843
The nubbin, everybody.
All right, now, let's...
371
00:13:17,009 --> 00:13:21,430
Hey-hey, ladies and gentlemen,
you've had enough of me.
372
00:13:21,597 --> 00:13:23,933
Are you ready for the absurdist
373
00:13:24,100 --> 00:13:26,644
cinematic spectacle of our time,
374
00:13:26,811 --> 00:13:28,187
Deep Throat?
375
00:13:47,957 --> 00:13:49,268
So do all
of Bob's assistants
376
00:13:49,292 --> 00:13:51,252
have to wait for
him to jerk off?
377
00:13:51,419 --> 00:13:52,795
I'm actually a VP at Paramount.
378
00:13:54,463 --> 00:13:55,965
But I started as his assistant,
379
00:13:56,132 --> 00:13:57,925
and he can't stop
thinkin' of me that way.
380
00:13:58,092 --> 00:14:00,595
The things
he makes me do.
381
00:14:00,761 --> 00:14:04,640
You know, if
I ever have an assistant,
382
00:14:04,807 --> 00:14:07,810
I swear I'm gonna
be so nice to him.
383
00:14:07,977 --> 00:14:09,812
- I do have an assistant.
- Mm.
384
00:14:09,979 --> 00:14:11,081
Who do you
think is standing
385
00:14:11,105 --> 00:14:13,316
outside Bob's door right now?
386
00:14:15,443 --> 00:14:17,737
No. No. I'm getting loopier
by the second, so...
387
00:14:19,572 --> 00:14:20,907
And if I like you loopy?
388
00:14:26,037 --> 00:14:27,872
Kevin, I'm done. I need
389
00:14:28,039 --> 00:14:29,474
a strawberry milkshake...
390
00:14:29,498 --> 00:14:30,642
and a menthol cigarette.
391
00:14:30,666 --> 00:14:32,627
Also, I, uh, fired
your assistant.
392
00:14:32,793 --> 00:14:34,003
He won't stop crying.
393
00:14:34,170 --> 00:14:35,588
- Duty calls.
- Mm.
394
00:14:37,590 --> 00:14:39,175
Can you get me a cab?
395
00:14:41,302 --> 00:14:42,303
I have a better idea.
396
00:14:44,972 --> 00:14:46,292
Listen,
having a clitoris
397
00:14:46,349 --> 00:14:47,829
deep down at the
bottom of your throat
398
00:14:47,892 --> 00:14:49,518
is better than having
no clitoris at all.
399
00:14:49,685 --> 00:14:53,439
That's easy for
you to say.
400
00:14:53,606 --> 00:14:55,733
Suppose your balls
were in your ear.
401
00:14:58,694 --> 00:15:00,130
Why, then I could
hear myself coming.
402
00:15:04,200 --> 00:15:06,243
Listen, we have
the problem solved.
403
00:15:06,410 --> 00:15:08,204
All we have to do now
is find a solution.
404
00:15:08,371 --> 00:15:10,331
Like what?
405
00:15:11,832 --> 00:15:14,001
Like-like deep throat.
406
00:15:14,168 --> 00:15:15,336
Sorry, sorry, sorry.
407
00:15:15,503 --> 00:15:16,605
- Oh, my God.
- Deep what?
408
00:15:16,629 --> 00:15:18,047
Deep throat.
409
00:15:18,214 --> 00:15:19,715
You make
it sound so easy.
410
00:15:19,882 --> 00:15:22,218
Well, it is.
411
00:15:22,385 --> 00:15:25,054
Try it. You'll like it.
412
00:15:25,221 --> 00:15:27,556
Well, what
have I got to lose?
413
00:15:27,723 --> 00:15:28,617
- Come dear.
- How much time
414
00:15:28,641 --> 00:15:29,850
we got left, Timmy?
415
00:15:30,017 --> 00:15:32,103
Seven, maybe eight minutes.
416
00:15:32,269 --> 00:15:34,149
Well, it-it's
better to give the audience
417
00:15:34,271 --> 00:15:36,065
some Deep Throat than
no Deep Throat, right?
418
00:15:36,232 --> 00:15:38,025
No. It's way worse.
419
00:15:38,192 --> 00:15:39,777
- See this crack?
- Yeah.
420
00:15:39,944 --> 00:15:42,029
Sound of Music,
'66. We spooled out
421
00:15:42,196 --> 00:15:43,614
right as the Nazis rushed in.
422
00:15:43,781 --> 00:15:45,050
All right, so we are
about to give blue balls
423
00:15:45,074 --> 00:15:46,283
to this entire theater.
424
00:15:46,450 --> 00:15:47,468
Is that what you're
telling me right now?
425
00:15:47,492 --> 00:15:49,286
Yes, sir.
426
00:15:49,453 --> 00:15:52,123
Teens? Teens? Please.
427
00:15:52,289 --> 00:15:53,958
I need you.
428
00:15:54,125 --> 00:15:55,805
I need you to go find
Richie and figure out
429
00:15:55,876 --> 00:15:57,044
what the holdup is.
430
00:15:57,211 --> 00:15:58,438
By the time I get
there and back,
431
00:15:58,462 --> 00:15:59,982
this reel'll be long
done. It doesn't m...
432
00:16:00,006 --> 00:16:01,108
No, I have a plan for that.
I have a plan for that.
433
00:16:01,132 --> 00:16:02,109
I'm gonna have Joyce go up there
434
00:16:02,133 --> 00:16:03,217
and tap dance a little bit.
435
00:16:03,384 --> 00:16:04,802
- Please. Please.
- Okay, but it...
436
00:16:04,969 --> 00:16:06,113
- it just doesn't make sense.
- I-I-I need you
437
00:16:06,137 --> 00:16:09,306
to go, please.
438
00:16:09,473 --> 00:16:11,642
- I'm begging you.
- Ooh, okay. Yep.
439
00:16:13,561 --> 00:16:15,146
Oh, God.
440
00:16:17,606 --> 00:16:20,526
It's a lot. Right?
441
00:16:20,693 --> 00:16:22,111
I've mostly been
watching the crowd
442
00:16:22,278 --> 00:16:23,838
- instead of the screen.
- What? Oh, no.
443
00:16:23,946 --> 00:16:26,198
I-I-I had a large cola.
444
00:16:26,365 --> 00:16:28,301
You know, after three kids,
whoosh, goes right through ya.
445
00:16:28,325 --> 00:16:29,761
Well, Lenny seems to
be having a good time.
446
00:16:29,785 --> 00:16:31,245
Oh, yeah.
Mark my words,
447
00:16:31,412 --> 00:16:32,848
he's in there workshopping
a Deep Throat joke
448
00:16:32,872 --> 00:16:34,040
he'll be telling for years.
449
00:16:37,793 --> 00:16:39,587
Huh? Ow!
450
00:16:39,754 --> 00:16:41,881
What's wrong with you?
451
00:16:44,425 --> 00:16:45,801
- Joan Didion?
- Oh, my God.
452
00:16:45,968 --> 00:16:48,471
Is it the auth... Joan
Didion? Is she here?
453
00:16:51,098 --> 00:16:53,100
- Hi. Hi.
- Oh, God.
454
00:16:53,267 --> 00:16:55,427
- I'm, uh... I'm Joyce...
- Joyce Prigger, yeah.
455
00:16:55,519 --> 00:16:56,854
I enjoyed your
little performance.
456
00:16:57,021 --> 00:17:00,066
Oh, God. Blech.
457
00:17:00,232 --> 00:17:01,400
What are you doing here?
458
00:17:01,567 --> 00:17:03,694
Forming an opinion.
459
00:17:03,861 --> 00:17:07,114
I wanted to see what all
the... the fuss was about.
460
00:17:07,281 --> 00:17:08,824
Well, people are
here.
461
00:17:08,991 --> 00:17:10,951
You know, and people
are really laughing.
462
00:17:11,117 --> 00:17:12,243
But I-I think that's because
463
00:17:12,411 --> 00:17:14,454
of the collective anxiety
464
00:17:14,622 --> 00:17:17,083
of watching something
so unsettling on screen.
465
00:17:17,249 --> 00:17:20,544
The laughter's a nervous
release, you know?
466
00:17:22,546 --> 00:17:23,815
I think they're laughing
'cause it's a comedy.
467
00:17:23,839 --> 00:17:25,508
Yes. I-I agree.
468
00:17:25,674 --> 00:17:27,234
Well, I don't think
it was their intent,
469
00:17:27,259 --> 00:17:29,178
but, uh, regardless,
470
00:17:29,345 --> 00:17:31,347
they seem to have
stumbled onto something.
471
00:17:31,514 --> 00:17:32,640
And will you excuse me?
472
00:17:41,899 --> 00:17:43,150
Hey, Joan?
473
00:17:43,317 --> 00:17:46,654
Um, fun idea just
occurred to me.
474
00:17:46,821 --> 00:17:48,090
What if you wrote
475
00:17:48,114 --> 00:17:49,573
about this for Minx?
476
00:17:49,740 --> 00:17:50,825
Uh...
477
00:17:50,991 --> 00:17:52,743
Just some small musings, really.
478
00:17:52,910 --> 00:17:53,929
Just you... just your thoughts
479
00:17:53,953 --> 00:17:56,205
on what it all means.
480
00:17:56,372 --> 00:17:58,874
It is possible to
continue this conversation
481
00:17:59,041 --> 00:18:01,001
at another time?
482
00:18:01,168 --> 00:18:04,004
Well, uh, actually,
483
00:18:04,171 --> 00:18:08,175
um, we're having an after-party,
484
00:18:08,342 --> 00:18:10,803
um, which you should come to.
485
00:18:10,970 --> 00:18:12,930
Um, and we can...
we can chat there
486
00:18:13,097 --> 00:18:15,015
if you like and talk about life
487
00:18:15,182 --> 00:18:18,227
and star signs
and...
488
00:18:18,394 --> 00:18:19,520
- Um...
- Oh.
489
00:18:19,687 --> 00:18:21,897
- There you go.
- Yeah.
490
00:18:22,064 --> 00:18:23,983
Is this in the valley?
491
00:18:27,862 --> 00:18:29,738
Help me push this
against the door.
492
00:18:29,905 --> 00:18:31,705
- It might buy us some time.
- Stop it.
493
00:18:35,411 --> 00:18:36,891
Her-her-her
eyes were smiling.
494
00:18:36,996 --> 00:18:38,247
You know? Like-like-like,
495
00:18:38,414 --> 00:18:41,458
from ear to ear. Oh!
496
00:18:41,625 --> 00:18:44,753
Oh, God, no!
497
00:18:44,920 --> 00:18:46,356
Oh! Oh, God.
498
00:18:46,380 --> 00:18:47,524
Oh, that's terrible.
499
00:18:47,548 --> 00:18:48,966
Find reel four.
500
00:18:49,133 --> 00:18:50,277
- All right. Jesus.
- Oh, okay.
501
00:18:50,301 --> 00:18:51,778
I haven't seen any of it.
How am I supposed to know
502
00:18:51,802 --> 00:18:53,071
- what's in reel four?
- Shout it out.
503
00:18:53,095 --> 00:18:54,030
- I'll know.
- I've got, uh,
504
00:18:54,054 --> 00:18:55,514
pubic shaving.
505
00:18:55,681 --> 00:18:57,099
Is this the nurse
making whoopie?
506
00:18:57,266 --> 00:18:59,143
There's a straw coming
out of her vagina.
507
00:18:59,310 --> 00:19:01,187
That's Coke dildo.
508
00:19:01,353 --> 00:19:02,521
Coke dildo starts reel four.
509
00:19:02,688 --> 00:19:03,707
All right,
give me reel four.
510
00:19:03,731 --> 00:19:05,524
It's reel four. Give it to me.
511
00:19:05,691 --> 00:19:07,067
Thank you. Come on.
512
00:19:07,234 --> 00:19:09,028
Oh, my
God. Give me that.
513
00:19:09,195 --> 00:19:10,362
- Come on.
- Fuck!
514
00:19:15,451 --> 00:19:17,453
Je... God, reel four.
515
00:19:20,080 --> 00:19:22,374
Case 358.
Albert Finster. Age 25.
516
00:19:22,541 --> 00:19:24,210
Bachelor.
517
00:19:24,376 --> 00:19:25,836
Has an obsession in finding out
518
00:19:26,003 --> 00:19:28,464
that things really do
go better with Coke.
519
00:19:28,631 --> 00:19:31,008
Relax your muscles...
520
00:19:33,010 --> 00:19:34,762
♪ I'd like to try ♪
521
00:19:37,556 --> 00:19:41,310
♪ Please don't
think Less of me ♪
522
00:19:41,477 --> 00:19:43,896
♪ I'd like to drink
A little Coke ♪
523
00:19:44,063 --> 00:19:45,898
All right.
524
00:19:46,065 --> 00:19:48,359
Oh. Thank you.
You're very kind.
525
00:19:48,525 --> 00:19:50,027
Thank you.
526
00:19:50,194 --> 00:19:52,279
Hi, hello.
527
00:19:52,446 --> 00:19:54,073
Did you enjoy it?
Love your boa.
528
00:19:54,240 --> 00:19:55,824
'Kay, thank you.
Great to meet you.
529
00:19:55,991 --> 00:19:58,327
Thank you. Oh, I'm
sorry. Excuse me.
530
00:19:58,494 --> 00:20:00,138
All right, you should
put some ice on that,
531
00:20:00,162 --> 00:20:01,747
because we have an
after-party to host.
532
00:20:01,914 --> 00:20:03,808
Thought you nixed that. Who
was it, Joyce Carol Oates
533
00:20:03,832 --> 00:20:05,552
in the bathtub, reading
a book or something?
534
00:20:05,584 --> 00:20:07,878
No, it's Joan Didion, and she's
coming to the party, okay?
535
00:20:08,045 --> 00:20:09,522
She might actually be
writing about Deep Throat
536
00:20:09,546 --> 00:20:11,882
for our magazine.
537
00:20:12,049 --> 00:20:13,849
Oh, God, this really is
a cultural phenomenon.
538
00:20:14,009 --> 00:20:15,570
- Uh... it's not gonna happen.
- Hi.
539
00:20:15,594 --> 00:20:16,988
We don't have time
to throw a party.
540
00:20:17,012 --> 00:20:18,657
What? No, it's fine.
Constance is all over it.
541
00:20:18,681 --> 00:20:19,974
She's got a caterer on retainer.
542
00:20:20,140 --> 00:20:21,725
- Constance...
- Yeah.
543
00:20:21,892 --> 00:20:23,892
Is gonna stock the booze
for one of our parties?
544
00:20:23,978 --> 00:20:25,187
- Yeah.
- No.
545
00:20:25,354 --> 00:20:26,665
- Why?
- No, no, if we're gonna do it,
546
00:20:26,689 --> 00:20:27,999
it's gotta be Tina.
I'll send Tina.
547
00:20:28,023 --> 00:20:29,251
- She knows what good...
- Tina! Where is Tina?
548
00:20:29,275 --> 00:20:30,915
I haven't seen her all
evening. Thank you.
549
00:20:31,944 --> 00:20:33,404
Hi! Oh, my God, hi.
550
00:20:37,199 --> 00:20:38,534
Enjoy!
551
00:20:42,955 --> 00:20:44,475
- Great choice.
- ♪ Oh, baby ♪
552
00:20:44,623 --> 00:20:46,625
♪ If it's all right... ♪
553
00:20:46,792 --> 00:20:48,186
No, no, I
liked it. I liked it.
554
00:20:48,210 --> 00:20:50,337
Of course, I've had a
lot of women patients,
555
00:20:50,504 --> 00:20:51,690
but the only thing
I've ever found
556
00:20:51,714 --> 00:20:52,774
in the back of a woman's throat
557
00:20:52,798 --> 00:20:54,008
is esophageal cancer.
558
00:20:54,174 --> 00:20:55,443
So another... oh, yeah.
559
00:20:55,467 --> 00:20:56,885
Hey, you're driving.
560
00:20:57,052 --> 00:20:58,530
Oh, the green
ones are for focus.
561
00:20:58,554 --> 00:21:00,514
Astronauts take them
to survive reentry.
562
00:21:00,681 --> 00:21:03,058
- You can have half.
- Ooh.
563
00:21:03,225 --> 00:21:04,077
- Give it.
- I love what you did
564
00:21:04,101 --> 00:21:05,287
with the lens flare.
It makes you feel
565
00:21:05,311 --> 00:21:06,231
like someone's looking.
566
00:21:06,353 --> 00:21:07,539
Most
people get derailed
567
00:21:07,563 --> 00:21:09,189
by the monster cock.
568
00:21:09,356 --> 00:21:11,233
Oh. Funny and talented.
569
00:21:11,400 --> 00:21:12,901
Hope you're ready
to hit the big time.
570
00:21:13,068 --> 00:21:14,748
Okay.
571
00:21:14,778 --> 00:21:17,281
Well, the difference
is, cane's got a crook,
572
00:21:17,448 --> 00:21:19,575
whereas this baby right
here... check that out.
573
00:21:19,742 --> 00:21:23,078
Nepalese fire opal.
574
00:21:23,245 --> 00:21:25,539
They say it's cursed.
575
00:21:25,706 --> 00:21:28,125
I say
it's expensive.
576
00:21:28,292 --> 00:21:29,918
- Ahem.
- A great piece.
577
00:21:30,085 --> 00:21:33,630
♪ I know you're
gonna Make it all right ♪
578
00:21:41,597 --> 00:21:43,057
Oh, yeah?
When I was a kid,
579
00:21:43,223 --> 00:21:44,600
I thought a blow job was someone
580
00:21:44,767 --> 00:21:46,352
literally blowing on your dick.
581
00:21:46,518 --> 00:21:48,228
No, the first time
I saw a penis,
582
00:21:48,395 --> 00:21:50,481
I thought it was a
long belly button.
583
00:21:50,647 --> 00:21:53,734
What kind of wackos
send these unsolicited?
584
00:21:53,901 --> 00:21:55,986
Aw, grandpa thinks he
belongs in a magazine.
585
00:21:57,780 --> 00:21:59,448
That's Wayne. He
has a purple heart.
586
00:21:59,615 --> 00:22:00,908
Yeah. And
a purple penis.
587
00:22:02,284 --> 00:22:05,245
Um...
588
00:22:05,412 --> 00:22:06,830
Hey, can
I get a refill?
589
00:22:08,999 --> 00:22:10,879
♪ Now, I know
That when I take you... ♪
590
00:22:13,712 --> 00:22:15,381
Ah,
nothing more attractive
591
00:22:15,547 --> 00:22:17,966
than a man doing the dishes.
592
00:22:18,133 --> 00:22:19,968
You know, if you were
20 years younger,
593
00:22:20,135 --> 00:22:21,655
I might just lock
you away in my tower.
594
00:22:21,804 --> 00:22:23,404
Well, if you
were ten years older,
595
00:22:23,472 --> 00:22:25,032
I might let ya.
596
00:22:25,099 --> 00:22:26,475
I'm just sayin' my goodbyes.
597
00:22:26,642 --> 00:22:28,002
Not bad for our
maiden voyage, huh?
598
00:22:28,102 --> 00:22:29,311
What do you think? You happy?
599
00:22:29,478 --> 00:22:31,158
I especially appreciate
the way you handled
600
00:22:31,271 --> 00:22:32,856
the debacle with
the missing reels
601
00:22:33,023 --> 00:22:34,775
and the police.
602
00:22:34,942 --> 00:22:36,485
- What police?
- Mm-hmm.
603
00:22:36,652 --> 00:22:37,629
I know that you're
used to taking care
604
00:22:37,653 --> 00:22:40,614
of all these things by
yourself, but use me.
605
00:22:40,781 --> 00:22:43,659
I was the DA's
third-largest donor,
606
00:22:43,826 --> 00:22:45,536
and that prickly son
of a bitch owes me.
607
00:22:45,702 --> 00:22:47,162
Good to know.
608
00:22:47,329 --> 00:22:49,498
But I like what I
saw tonight, Douglas.
609
00:22:49,665 --> 00:22:51,625
I'm very excited to
roll up our sleeves
610
00:22:51,792 --> 00:22:53,335
and see where this is gonna go.
611
00:22:53,502 --> 00:22:54,420
Me too.
612
00:22:54,586 --> 00:22:56,338
Oh, and by the way,
613
00:22:56,505 --> 00:23:00,008
awfully generous of you to
give Joyce the larger office.
614
00:23:00,175 --> 00:23:01,510
You are a gentleman.
615
00:23:09,977 --> 00:23:10,977
Your car is on Mulholland
616
00:23:11,103 --> 00:23:12,183
somewhere between Coldwater
617
00:23:12,229 --> 00:23:13,730
and Laurel Canyon.
618
00:23:13,897 --> 00:23:15,542
That Rolls is a piece
of shit, and so are you.
619
00:23:15,566 --> 00:23:16,817
I shouldn't have sent you,
620
00:23:16,984 --> 00:23:17,919
but there was no way I
could have reached...
621
00:23:17,943 --> 00:23:19,319
Laurel and Coldwater?
622
00:23:19,486 --> 00:23:20,766
That's a two-mile
stretch, Teens.
623
00:23:20,904 --> 00:23:22,281
Tough shit.
624
00:23:22,448 --> 00:23:23,633
I just walked into
a big-ass party
625
00:23:23,657 --> 00:23:25,117
that I wasn't invited to
626
00:23:25,284 --> 00:23:27,619
for a movie I didn't get to see.
627
00:23:27,786 --> 00:23:28,805
Go back to
the party, guys.
628
00:23:28,829 --> 00:23:30,831
Have fun. Tina, please,
629
00:23:30,998 --> 00:23:32,142
you think that was my intention?
630
00:23:32,166 --> 00:23:33,518
There was no way
I could reach you.
631
00:23:33,542 --> 00:23:35,586
Résumés for
my replacement.
632
00:23:35,752 --> 00:23:38,005
I am the managing editor,
Doug, not your secretary.
633
00:23:38,172 --> 00:23:40,215
If you need me, I'll be drinking
634
00:23:40,382 --> 00:23:42,509
your secret Scotch
in Joyce's office.
635
00:23:42,676 --> 00:23:44,052
That's where the
fun seems to be.
636
00:23:44,219 --> 00:23:47,848
The-the-the only thing
637
00:23:48,015 --> 00:23:49,325
I've found at the back
of a woman's throat
638
00:23:49,349 --> 00:23:51,852
is a swollen uvula.
639
00:23:53,061 --> 00:23:54,789
Okay, these pills are
definitely making me funnier.
640
00:23:54,813 --> 00:23:56,541
- Can I have the other half now?
- No. It's 2:00 a.m.
641
00:23:56,565 --> 00:23:58,045
The sitter probably
thinks we're dead.
642
00:23:58,192 --> 00:23:59,818
Okay, so what's another hour?
643
00:23:59,985 --> 00:24:01,612
You've had enough, okay?
644
00:24:01,778 --> 00:24:04,615
Y-you can tell all your
friends tomorrow at the club
645
00:24:04,781 --> 00:24:08,118
about your big party
with the porn stars.
646
00:24:08,285 --> 00:24:10,913
That's what you think
this night is about?
647
00:24:11,079 --> 00:24:12,706
Shell...
648
00:24:14,958 --> 00:24:17,169
Something is going on with
you, and I don't know what.
649
00:24:17,336 --> 00:24:19,022
And I-I don't quite know
why, but I just figured
650
00:24:19,046 --> 00:24:19,981
it would be good
for us to get away
651
00:24:20,005 --> 00:24:20,982
from the kids and the house
652
00:24:21,006 --> 00:24:22,006
and the responsibilities,
653
00:24:22,132 --> 00:24:23,452
try to have a
little fun together?
654
00:24:24,760 --> 00:24:26,136
I would like that, too,
655
00:24:26,303 --> 00:24:29,097
to have some fun with you.
656
00:24:29,640 --> 00:24:31,892
Look, I love you.
657
00:24:32,059 --> 00:24:33,560
And-and whatever this is,
658
00:24:33,727 --> 00:24:35,270
I wanna figure it out with you.
659
00:24:35,437 --> 00:24:36,438
Do whatever it takes.
660
00:24:38,774 --> 00:24:40,526
I do still have that
other half, so...
661
00:24:44,446 --> 00:24:47,367
♪ ...to
your lips, darlin' ♪
662
00:24:47,533 --> 00:24:51,370
♪ It's poison to some ♪
663
00:24:51,796 --> 00:24:53,005
Come with me.
664
00:24:53,030 --> 00:24:54,073
I know a place.
665
00:24:55,666 --> 00:24:57,492
kiss.
666
00:24:58,252 --> 00:25:00,270
- Oh.
- Watch out,
667
00:25:00,295 --> 00:25:01,731
the cabinet on the left
is a little wobbly.
668
00:25:01,802 --> 00:25:03,438
Okay.
669
00:25:07,254 --> 00:25:08,796
You're the
belle of the ball.
670
00:25:08,821 --> 00:25:10,948
Joan! Hi.
671
00:25:10,973 --> 00:25:12,891
I didn't know you
were here. Hi.
672
00:25:13,058 --> 00:25:14,351
That's by design.
673
00:25:14,799 --> 00:25:15,727
Oh.
674
00:25:17,062 --> 00:25:19,022
Is that your notebook?
675
00:25:19,189 --> 00:25:21,441
Are you-are you considering
writing the piece?
676
00:25:22,069 --> 00:25:25,063
I don't think I have
much to say about Deep Throat.
677
00:25:25,498 --> 00:25:28,529
Oh. Really?
678
00:25:28,554 --> 00:25:29,545
Mm.
679
00:25:29,800 --> 00:25:31,969
But doesn't it seem
like people are longing
680
00:25:31,994 --> 00:25:35,664
for a way to be more
open about sexuality
681
00:25:35,689 --> 00:25:39,977
and-and to ask questions
without feeling shame?
682
00:25:40,002 --> 00:25:41,753
And so they've turned
this ridiculous movie
683
00:25:41,920 --> 00:25:43,313
into this spectacle
684
00:25:43,338 --> 00:25:46,091
to give themselves a
way to do just that.
685
00:25:46,258 --> 00:25:47,944
And, do you know, I don't
think it stops there.
686
00:25:47,968 --> 00:25:50,028
I-I think... I don't know.
687
00:25:50,053 --> 00:25:51,930
This feels like the
beginning of something.
688
00:25:52,097 --> 00:25:54,391
♪ It's
poison for some ♪
689
00:25:54,558 --> 00:25:56,476
Sounds like you've already
started writing it.
690
00:25:57,068 --> 00:25:59,237
♪ So
wait like a lady ♪
691
00:25:59,262 --> 00:26:03,308
♪ Lady, lady, lady
Lady, lady, lady ♪
692
00:26:03,333 --> 00:26:05,294
♪ Wait like a lady
Wait like a lady ♪
693
00:26:05,319 --> 00:26:07,404
♪ Lady, lady, lady... ♪
694
00:26:10,824 --> 00:26:13,118
- Hey.
- Hey.
695
00:26:13,285 --> 00:26:15,096
Well, this is the biggest
party we've ever thrown.
696
00:26:15,120 --> 00:26:16,413
Oh, by far.
697
00:26:18,332 --> 00:26:19,666
Ernest Borgnine
and Warren Beatty
698
00:26:19,833 --> 00:26:21,113
came to blows in
the parking lot.
699
00:26:21,209 --> 00:26:23,670
What? Why didn't
anybody come tell me?
700
00:26:23,837 --> 00:26:26,048
It wasn't a fair fight.
701
00:26:26,214 --> 00:26:27,591
Ernie dropped with one punch.
702
00:26:27,758 --> 00:26:29,885
Ugh, I fucking
missed everything.
703
00:26:33,430 --> 00:26:35,223
I think I like the
old parties better.
704
00:26:35,390 --> 00:26:37,476
Yeah. Porn's gone mainstream.
705
00:26:59,873 --> 00:27:04,474
♪ My daddy said ♪
706
00:27:06,509 --> 00:27:11,555
♪ Son, the time's done come ♪
707
00:27:13,025 --> 00:27:16,323
♪ I'm gonna turn you loose
And let go your hand ♪
708
00:27:16,348 --> 00:27:21,005
♪ You got to go in the world
And prove yourself a man ♪
709
00:27:22,412 --> 00:27:24,640
♪ 'Cause you been
Put down here ♪
710
00:27:24,665 --> 00:27:26,433
♪ To be number one ♪
711
00:27:26,458 --> 00:27:28,310
♪ You've got to rise
In the morning ♪
712
00:27:28,335 --> 00:27:30,083
♪ And meet the sun ♪
713
00:27:30,108 --> 00:27:33,173
♪ You gotta sit at the
table And break the bread ♪
714
00:27:33,198 --> 00:27:34,919
♪ And if the blood
In your veins ♪
715
00:27:34,944 --> 00:27:36,696
♪ Is runnin' red ♪
716
00:27:36,785 --> 00:27:38,637
♪ Then you ought to be a man ♪
717
00:27:38,662 --> 00:27:41,818
♪ Or you might
as well Be dead ♪
718
00:27:47,212 --> 00:27:51,425
♪ My daddy said ♪
719
00:27:53,844 --> 00:27:57,889
♪ Son, the time's done come ♪
720
00:28:00,559 --> 00:28:03,979
♪ You got to look all
around Find a solid stone ♪
721
00:28:04,146 --> 00:28:05,647
♪ You got to make
Things ready ♪
722
00:28:05,814 --> 00:28:09,735
♪ And build yourself a home ♪
723
00:28:09,901 --> 00:28:11,945
♪ 'Cause you been
Put down here ♪
724
00:28:12,112 --> 00:28:13,989
♪ To be number one ♪
725
00:28:14,156 --> 00:28:15,476
♪ You got to rise
In the morning ♪
726
00:28:15,574 --> 00:28:17,743
♪ And meet the sun ♪
727
00:28:17,909 --> 00:28:20,495
♪ You got to sit at the
table And break the bread ♪
728
00:28:20,662 --> 00:28:22,581
♪ And if the blood
In your veins ♪
729
00:28:22,748 --> 00:28:24,374
♪ Is runnin' red ♪
730
00:28:24,541 --> 00:28:25,876
♪ Then you ought to be a man ♪
731
00:28:26,042 --> 00:28:27,878
♪ Or you might
as well Be dead ♪
732
00:28:28,044 --> 00:28:29,671
Eighteen.
733
00:28:32,301 --> 00:28:34,428
Motherfuck.
734
00:28:35,077 --> 00:28:39,495
♪ My daddy said ♪
735
00:28:41,808 --> 00:28:46,612
♪ Son, the time's done come ♪
736
00:28:48,023 --> 00:28:49,875
♪ You got To find
you a woman ♪
737
00:28:49,900 --> 00:28:52,068
♪ And treat her good ♪
738
00:28:52,110 --> 00:28:55,030
♪ Do your duty Like
you know you should ♪
739
00:28:55,065 --> 00:28:58,492
♪ You'll never have to
worry 'Bout bein' alone ♪
740
00:28:58,658 --> 00:29:01,578
♪ The woman's gonna
make you A happy home ♪
741
00:29:04,289 --> 00:29:06,166
♪ 'Cause you been
Put down here ♪
742
00:29:06,333 --> 00:29:08,126
♪ To be number one ♪
743
00:29:08,293 --> 00:29:09,961
♪ You got to rise
In the morning ♪
744
00:29:10,128 --> 00:29:11,963
♪ And meet the sun ♪
745
00:29:11,988 --> 00:29:14,925
♪ You got to sit at the
table And break the bread ♪
746
00:29:15,091 --> 00:29:16,752
♪ And if the blood
In your veins ♪
747
00:29:16,777 --> 00:29:18,545
♪ Is runnin' red ♪
748
00:29:18,570 --> 00:29:20,530
♪ Then you ought to be a man ♪
749
00:29:20,555 --> 00:29:24,935
♪ Or you might
as well Be dead ♪
750
00:29:29,689 --> 00:29:32,567
♪ Then you ought to be a man ♪
751
00:29:32,734 --> 00:29:38,198
♪ Or you might
as well Be dead ♪53256
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