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1
00:00:03,476 --> 00:00:05,812
All right, who's ready
to have a good time, huh?
2
00:00:05,895 --> 00:00:07,855
That's right.
So welcome here.
3
00:00:07,939 --> 00:00:10,149
Uh, show of hands,
how many people have been
4
00:00:10,233 --> 00:00:11,567
to a taping
of a TV show before?
5
00:00:11,651 --> 00:00:13,069
Thank you.
6
00:00:13,152 --> 00:00:16,739
Okay, just remember,
the movie's hilarious.
7
00:00:16,823 --> 00:00:18,032
Everyone buy tickets.
8
00:00:18,116 --> 00:00:20,326
- Let me ask you a question.
- Yeah?
9
00:00:20,410 --> 00:00:21,470
Do you think I'm good
in the movie?
10
00:00:21,494 --> 00:00:22,680
Come on, Kev,
I'm your agent.
11
00:00:22,704 --> 00:00:24,265
Of course, I think you're good
in the movie.
12
00:00:24,289 --> 00:00:26,332
You know who else thinks
you're good in the movie?
13
00:00:26,416 --> 00:00:28,376
The studio.
Now, go knock 'em dead.
14
00:00:28,459 --> 00:00:31,045
Big smiles, big laughs,
you're America's funny man.
15
00:00:31,129 --> 00:00:33,274
The house band's gonna
play a little bit for ya,
16
00:00:33,298 --> 00:00:34,358
and, uh, we're gonna have
a great time, all right?
17
00:00:34,382 --> 00:00:36,092
America's funny man.
18
00:00:38,928 --> 00:00:41,639
Oh, now, Kev,
people are just raving
19
00:00:41,723 --> 00:00:42,974
about this new movie
of yours.
20
00:00:43,057 --> 00:00:44,809
Oh, my God,
they are raving.
21
00:00:44,892 --> 00:00:48,187
You are working with
Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson,
22
00:00:48,271 --> 00:00:50,273
playing
his comedy sidekick again.
23
00:00:50,356 --> 00:00:51,858
What is this,
the sixth time now?
24
00:00:51,941 --> 00:00:54,277
- Number six.
- How do you keep it so fresh?
25
00:00:54,360 --> 00:00:57,030
I mean, look,
Dwayne and I are, um,
26
00:00:57,113 --> 00:00:57,989
you know, we're friends.
27
00:00:58,072 --> 00:00:59,324
- Lucky.
- Hashtag, Jealous.
28
00:01:01,034 --> 00:01:03,536
He's lucky, too.
He's lucky, too.
29
00:01:03,619 --> 00:01:05,246
But, I mean, look,
when you are friends,
30
00:01:05,330 --> 00:01:06,664
you feed off of each other,
31
00:01:06,748 --> 00:01:08,624
that energy, of course,
transfers.
32
00:01:08,708 --> 00:01:10,060
But, uh, I don't know,
I would like to think
33
00:01:10,084 --> 00:01:13,254
of my-my characters
as-as heroes as well.
34
00:01:15,757 --> 00:01:19,177
I don't know...
I don't know why the laugh.
35
00:01:19,260 --> 00:01:20,928
I'm very serious.
36
00:01:21,012 --> 00:01:22,805
You know, I've actually
I've been...
37
00:01:22,889 --> 00:01:24,489
I've been trying to become
a leading man,
38
00:01:24,557 --> 00:01:26,726
you know, do more
of an action star thing,
39
00:01:26,809 --> 00:01:28,978
but I've been-I've been
somewhat typecast.
40
00:01:29,062 --> 00:01:30,414
For some reason, people only
see me as the funny guy.
41
00:01:30,438 --> 00:01:31,647
- You make me laugh.
- No.
42
00:01:31,731 --> 00:01:32,648
- Yeah.
- Thank you.
43
00:01:32,732 --> 00:01:33,834
Glad-glad, you know,
appreciate it.
44
00:01:33,858 --> 00:01:36,110
I'm not an easy audience.
45
00:01:36,194 --> 00:01:37,254
Yeah, you know,
but it's just it's...
46
00:01:37,278 --> 00:01:39,614
I can do more
than show up
47
00:01:39,697 --> 00:01:42,283
and do the funny
or do the dance. I'm...
48
00:01:42,367 --> 00:01:43,635
- Would you, though?
- Would you do that dance?
49
00:01:43,659 --> 00:01:44,659
- Come on.
- Come on!
50
00:01:44,702 --> 00:01:47,663
Who wants to see
Kevin dance, huh?
51
00:01:47,747 --> 00:01:50,249
We'll get
the "Macarena" going.
52
00:01:50,333 --> 00:01:52,919
No. No.
53
00:01:53,002 --> 00:01:54,337
I'm not...
I'm not gonna dance.
54
00:01:54,420 --> 00:01:55,814
Next time.
Next time then, for sure.
55
00:01:55,838 --> 00:01:57,131
Now, here's just a question.
56
00:01:57,215 --> 00:02:00,343
Like, okay, when you...
when you see Idris Elba, right,
57
00:02:00,426 --> 00:02:02,506
you see him and you go,
"Wow, that's an action star".
58
00:02:02,553 --> 00:02:05,181
But if you took
six inches off of Idris,
59
00:02:05,264 --> 00:02:06,724
nobody...
nobody's gonna give a shit.
60
00:02:06,808 --> 00:02:08,226
- Okay-okay, just...
- Okay.
61
00:02:08,309 --> 00:02:10,395
Gentle reminder here,
it's a live broadcast.
62
00:02:10,478 --> 00:02:11,896
Got it.
But you get my point.
63
00:02:11,979 --> 00:02:13,272
Nobody's gonna care.
- Right.
64
00:02:13,356 --> 00:02:14,565
All right,
if he was smaller.
65
00:02:14,649 --> 00:02:16,210
I mean, I don't think
I know any action stars
66
00:02:16,234 --> 00:02:18,653
that are 5'7".
Can we name one?
67
00:02:18,736 --> 00:02:21,572
There's, um...
Oh, there's Mr. Tom Cruise.
68
00:02:21,656 --> 00:02:22,824
Oh, wonderful.
69
00:02:22,907 --> 00:02:24,510
Who we love.
A favorite here on the show.
70
00:02:24,534 --> 00:02:26,095
Okay. Tom Cruise.
That's one. All right.
71
00:02:26,119 --> 00:02:27,453
- Jackie Chan.
- Yeah!
72
00:02:27,537 --> 00:02:29,872
- Isn't he great.
- Oh, he's a little guy.
73
00:02:29,956 --> 00:02:32,041
I feel like
you're being a dick.
74
00:02:32,125 --> 00:02:34,460
Is-Is this a bit?
75
00:02:34,544 --> 00:02:36,129
Are you guys...
is this a bit?
76
00:02:36,212 --> 00:02:38,673
I-I think it may have been.
Getting back to the movie,
77
00:02:38,756 --> 00:02:40,842
tell us-tell us
just how great this movie is.
78
00:02:40,925 --> 00:02:43,302
The, uh,
the movie's garbage.
79
00:02:43,386 --> 00:02:46,431
- Sorry?
- Yeah, the movie's garbage.
80
00:02:46,514 --> 00:02:49,100
Take the movie, ball it up,
throw it in the trash can.
81
00:02:49,183 --> 00:02:51,477
How many times do you need
to see me in a car
82
00:02:51,561 --> 00:02:53,396
with Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson?
83
00:02:53,479 --> 00:02:56,149
And I'm the comedy sidekick,
and he's saving lives,
84
00:02:56,232 --> 00:02:58,526
and I got a catchphrase,
"Oh, hell no"?
85
00:02:58,609 --> 00:02:59,485
We love it
when you say that.
86
00:02:59,569 --> 00:03:01,320
Oh, good.
Can you do it again?
87
00:03:01,404 --> 00:03:03,865
Here's my question.
Why can't I be an action star?
88
00:03:03,948 --> 00:03:07,118
I read something online
about you being afraid
89
00:03:07,201 --> 00:03:08,619
of woodland creatures.
90
00:03:08,703 --> 00:03:10,037
- Oh, yes.
- About me what?
91
00:03:10,121 --> 00:03:11,181
Beaver?
It was it a squirrel?
92
00:03:11,205 --> 00:03:12,123
- Squirrel.
- A squirrel.
93
00:03:12,206 --> 00:03:13,082
- It was a squirrel.
- Yes.
94
00:03:13,166 --> 00:03:14,000
That you have a fear
of squirrels.
95
00:03:14,083 --> 00:03:15,001
Who's afraid of a squirrel?
96
00:03:15,084 --> 00:03:16,437
I'm not fuckin' afraid
of a squirrel.
97
00:03:16,461 --> 00:03:17,795
- Okay.
- Ooh.
98
00:03:17,879 --> 00:03:18,981
- I'm not afraid of shit!
- Okay, you've said it.
99
00:03:19,005 --> 00:03:20,774
You've made your point there.
- I'm not afraid of shit,
100
00:03:20,798 --> 00:03:22,717
and I'm more than just a guy
that does comedy.
101
00:03:22,800 --> 00:03:24,552
I'm a fuckin' action star,
all right?
102
00:03:24,635 --> 00:03:26,488
So why don't you start
taking me a little serious?
103
00:03:26,512 --> 00:03:28,347
Tell me what I am
and what I'm not.
104
00:03:28,431 --> 00:03:29,991
If I didn't have
what the fuck it takes,
105
00:03:30,057 --> 00:03:32,101
would I show this?
Or that?
106
00:03:34,937 --> 00:03:35,771
Back up.
- Yep.
107
00:03:35,855 --> 00:03:36,939
Kev, Kev, Kev.
108
00:03:37,023 --> 00:03:38,125
Kev, hey, you gotta go
back out there.
109
00:03:38,149 --> 00:03:39,192
Say it was a joke.
110
00:03:39,275 --> 00:03:40,711
I'm not telling them
it was a joke.
111
00:03:40,735 --> 00:03:41,944
You don't get it, man.
112
00:03:42,028 --> 00:03:43,505
All right? I'm trying
to be taken seriously.
113
00:03:43,529 --> 00:03:45,740
My whole life, I've dreamed
of becoming an action hero.
114
00:03:45,823 --> 00:03:47,909
Well, you know,
maybe instead of dreaming,
115
00:03:47,992 --> 00:03:49,344
you should just
stay in your own lane.
116
00:03:49,368 --> 00:03:51,204
What the fuck
did you just say?
117
00:03:51,287 --> 00:03:52,788
- What are you doin'?
- Ooh!
118
00:03:54,665 --> 00:03:55,708
Pssshhh...
119
00:03:57,752 --> 00:03:59,795
That was a bit.
Doin' a bit.
120
00:04:03,466 --> 00:04:05,092
I'm not
afraid of!
121
00:04:05,176 --> 00:04:06,445
Okay, you've said it.
You've made your point there.
122
00:04:06,469 --> 00:04:07,738
- I'm not afraid of.
- Yup.
123
00:04:07,762 --> 00:04:08,947
And I'm more than just
a guy that does comedy.
124
00:04:08,971 --> 00:04:10,640
I'm a action star,
all right?
125
00:04:10,723 --> 00:04:12,892
So why don't you start?
126
00:04:12,975 --> 00:04:14,644
That was our star,
Kevin Hart.
127
00:04:14,727 --> 00:04:19,315
And apparently he's...
going through something.
128
00:04:19,398 --> 00:04:21,001
To say the least.
You don't see Tom Cruise...
129
00:04:27,031 --> 00:04:28,342
I already know
what you're gonna say.
130
00:04:28,366 --> 00:04:30,368
You're gonna say apologize,
then after that...
131
00:04:30,451 --> 00:04:32,537
No, no, no, Kev,
it's too late to apologize.
132
00:04:32,620 --> 00:04:35,498
The studio already removed you
from the fuckin' billboard.
133
00:04:35,581 --> 00:04:37,625
So I'm done?
Just like that, I'm done?
134
00:04:37,708 --> 00:04:39,835
Maybe not.
135
00:04:39,919 --> 00:04:42,713
Claude Van De Velde
wants to meet with you.
136
00:04:45,967 --> 00:04:47,718
Claude Van De Velde?
137
00:04:47,802 --> 00:04:48,678
You talking about
the director?
138
00:04:48,761 --> 00:04:50,388
Yes, Claude Van De Velde,
139
00:04:50,471 --> 00:04:52,391
director of four of the six
biggest action movies
140
00:04:52,431 --> 00:04:55,893
of all time,
saw the interview...
141
00:04:55,977 --> 00:04:57,019
and wants to meet.
142
00:04:57,103 --> 00:04:58,729
Why?
143
00:04:58,813 --> 00:05:00,356
You know what?
It don't matter.
144
00:05:00,439 --> 00:05:01,583
It doesn't even
fucking matter.
145
00:05:01,607 --> 00:05:04,277
I'm there.
Okay? I'm there.
146
00:05:06,737 --> 00:05:08,114
Oh, shit.
147
00:05:16,038 --> 00:05:20,042
I have seen all your films.
I like all your films.
148
00:05:20,126 --> 00:05:22,378
But you, Kevin,
you don't like your films.
149
00:05:22,461 --> 00:05:25,923
- Wow, you can tell, huh?
- Of course I can tell.
150
00:05:26,007 --> 00:05:28,884
You and I,
we are the same.
151
00:05:28,968 --> 00:05:32,305
My movies have grossed
billions of dollars.
152
00:05:32,388 --> 00:05:33,556
Who cares?
- Yeah.
153
00:05:33,639 --> 00:05:36,392
I mean, it's not about
the money, right?
154
00:05:36,475 --> 00:05:40,479
It is about finding yourself
inside an artistic expression.
155
00:05:40,563 --> 00:05:42,231
Yes.
156
00:05:42,315 --> 00:05:45,735
I want to find you, Kevin.
157
00:05:45,818 --> 00:05:47,987
Will you let me find you?
158
00:05:48,070 --> 00:05:51,949
You found me.
I'm right here, man.
159
00:05:52,033 --> 00:05:55,494
My next project is
a serious gritty action film.
160
00:05:55,578 --> 00:06:00,124
It requires
a serious, gritty actor.
161
00:06:00,207 --> 00:06:02,335
You, Kevin.
162
00:06:02,418 --> 00:06:05,046
I want you
in the leading role.
163
00:06:05,129 --> 00:06:07,548
Holy shit, man.
You gotta be...
164
00:06:07,632 --> 00:06:10,217
Excuse you. Watch it, man.
- My apologies, sir.
165
00:06:10,301 --> 00:06:12,928
Mark Wahlberg would not
scream at a party server.
166
00:06:13,012 --> 00:06:15,181
Oh, I didn't scream.
I didn't scream.
167
00:06:15,264 --> 00:06:17,642
An action star
is tough, confident,
168
00:06:17,725 --> 00:06:19,268
unfazed by minor details
169
00:06:19,352 --> 00:06:22,480
that disrupt
the average person.
170
00:06:22,563 --> 00:06:24,690
Yeah, I-I was unfazed.
171
00:06:24,774 --> 00:06:25,959
I wasn't fazed
at all from that.
172
00:06:25,983 --> 00:06:28,069
If you really want
this part,
173
00:06:28,152 --> 00:06:30,821
I need you to attend
a training program.
174
00:06:30,905 --> 00:06:34,408
All the best action stars
have gone through it.
175
00:06:34,492 --> 00:06:35,844
Are you talkin'
like action star school?
176
00:06:35,868 --> 00:06:40,081
Stallone, Van Damme,
Steven Seagal,
177
00:06:40,164 --> 00:06:42,625
Jackie Chan,
they're all alums.
178
00:06:42,708 --> 00:06:44,251
I just kind of assumed
all those guys
179
00:06:44,335 --> 00:06:47,338
had to have the juice.
The mojo.
180
00:06:47,421 --> 00:06:49,423
Do you remember
what Matt Damon
181
00:06:49,507 --> 00:06:52,385
was before
he was Jason Bourne?
182
00:06:52,468 --> 00:06:53,969
Yeah.
He just won an Oscar.
183
00:06:54,053 --> 00:06:55,680
Neither do I.
184
00:06:55,763 --> 00:06:59,392
This program turned a no-name
Matt Damon into a leading man
185
00:06:59,475 --> 00:07:01,102
revered around the world.
186
00:07:01,185 --> 00:07:03,646
Look,
with all due respect,
187
00:07:03,729 --> 00:07:06,691
I don't need that. I don't...
I don't need none of that.
188
00:07:06,774 --> 00:07:08,317
I'm ready now.
189
00:07:08,401 --> 00:07:11,821
I'm ready right now.
190
00:07:11,904 --> 00:07:14,532
Down here, Kevin.
191
00:07:14,615 --> 00:07:16,242
You don't think
you need training?
192
00:07:16,325 --> 00:07:18,828
You want the part
right now?
193
00:07:18,911 --> 00:07:23,040
Well, your new body is waiting
for you on that rooftop.
194
00:07:25,960 --> 00:07:27,837
Go and get it.
195
00:07:41,767 --> 00:07:43,102
Oh, shit!
Ahh!
196
00:07:44,311 --> 00:07:46,063
Help! Help me!
Help me!
197
00:07:46,147 --> 00:07:47,857
So good.
198
00:07:47,940 --> 00:07:49,442
He's doing his famous
"help me" scene
199
00:07:49,525 --> 00:07:50,985
from "Ride Along 2".
- Help!
200
00:07:54,822 --> 00:07:56,675
Look, Kev,
I don't love the idea
201
00:07:56,699 --> 00:07:58,409
of you driving out
to the middle of nowhere
202
00:07:58,492 --> 00:08:00,494
- to go to some...
- Action star school.
203
00:08:00,578 --> 00:08:02,204
Right, yes.
That.
204
00:08:02,288 --> 00:08:04,665
Kev, maybe we just
wait a little longer.
205
00:08:04,749 --> 00:08:05,851
Eventually,
the studios will forget
206
00:08:05,875 --> 00:08:07,209
how badly you fucked up,
207
00:08:07,293 --> 00:08:08,353
and they'll offer you
a new sidekick role.
208
00:08:08,377 --> 00:08:11,422
No, this is my time
to shine.
209
00:08:11,505 --> 00:08:13,883
You believe in me,
don't you?
210
00:08:13,966 --> 00:08:17,261
Don't you?
Danny?
211
00:08:17,344 --> 00:08:19,889
You believe in... Oh, shit.
212
00:08:19,972 --> 00:08:21,515
Damn reception.
213
00:08:29,356 --> 00:08:31,317
Oh, hell no.
214
00:08:42,369 --> 00:08:45,039
Ron Wilcox?
215
00:08:45,122 --> 00:08:47,625
Oh, shit.
216
00:08:47,708 --> 00:08:49,627
Don't be a bitch, Kevin.
217
00:08:49,710 --> 00:08:53,464
Be Academy Award-winning
Matt Damon.
218
00:08:53,547 --> 00:08:55,257
Get the fuck off my car.
219
00:08:59,595 --> 00:09:01,388
Uh...
220
00:09:01,472 --> 00:09:04,266
Hello?
221
00:09:04,350 --> 00:09:08,187
Anybody here?
222
00:09:08,270 --> 00:09:10,439
Claude Van De Velde,
he sent me.
223
00:09:10,523 --> 00:09:12,125
I don't know, you tell me
what you wanna tell me.
224
00:09:12,149 --> 00:09:14,610
Why are you here?
Why are you here?
225
00:09:14,693 --> 00:09:16,946
- Where's my nephew at?
- Uh, fellas?
226
00:09:17,029 --> 00:09:18,173
What do you mean
where's your nephew?
227
00:09:18,197 --> 00:09:19,674
I don't know where the fuck
your nephew is.
228
00:09:19,698 --> 00:09:24,662
- Hey, excuse me?
- Now you don't trust me?
229
00:09:24,745 --> 00:09:26,580
I know you murdered
my nephew, Rodrigo.
230
00:09:26,664 --> 00:09:29,625
Bullshit, motherfucker!
I didn't murder Rodrigo.
231
00:09:29,708 --> 00:09:32,044
Look, you got your money.
I got my shipment.
232
00:09:32,127 --> 00:09:34,088
I don't know
where Rodrigo is.
233
00:09:34,171 --> 00:09:35,631
Maybe he's fucking
your mother.
234
00:09:35,714 --> 00:09:37,091
Oh, training
has already begun.
235
00:09:37,174 --> 00:09:39,802
Okay. Uh...
236
00:09:39,885 --> 00:09:42,096
You. You. Oh, come on!
Bring it! Bring it!
237
00:09:42,179 --> 00:09:44,139
Come on, bring that bat,
motherfucker!
238
00:09:44,223 --> 00:09:46,267
Hey!
239
00:09:46,350 --> 00:09:48,936
You wanna
push somebody around?
240
00:09:49,019 --> 00:09:51,981
Try me out.
241
00:09:52,064 --> 00:09:55,609
Hey, and what are you,
a tough guy?
242
00:09:55,693 --> 00:09:57,403
Goddamn right,
I'm a tough guy.
243
00:09:57,486 --> 00:09:59,238
North Philadelphia tough.
244
00:09:59,321 --> 00:10:01,407
I'm Kevin motherfucking...
245
00:10:06,328 --> 00:10:10,416
Ah!
246
00:10:10,499 --> 00:10:11,876
What the hell happened?
247
00:10:11,959 --> 00:10:14,378
Welcome to Ron Wilcox
Action Star School.
248
00:10:14,461 --> 00:10:15,796
I'm Ron Wilcox,
249
00:10:15,880 --> 00:10:17,172
and that was
your first lesson.
250
00:10:17,256 --> 00:10:18,696
Gettin' hit in the head
with a bat?
251
00:10:18,757 --> 00:10:21,802
Oh, you are naive.
That was a prop bat.
252
00:10:21,886 --> 00:10:24,006
It that was made of plastic.
- Wasn't goddamn plastic.
253
00:10:24,054 --> 00:10:25,198
I've been hit
with a bat before,
254
00:10:25,222 --> 00:10:26,449
I know what a metal bat
fuckin' feel like.
255
00:10:26,473 --> 00:10:27,808
All right.
256
00:10:27,892 --> 00:10:30,311
Hey, Mr. Van De Velde
told me to tell him
257
00:10:30,394 --> 00:10:32,563
if you complain about
anything being too difficult.
258
00:10:32,646 --> 00:10:34,064
No.
No, no, no, no, no.
259
00:10:34,148 --> 00:10:35,166
I'm not complaining.
- Mm-hmm.
260
00:10:35,190 --> 00:10:36,066
I'm not complaining
about nothing.
261
00:10:36,150 --> 00:10:37,401
I loved that.
262
00:10:37,484 --> 00:10:38,319
I thought it was great,
to be honest with you,
263
00:10:38,402 --> 00:10:39,653
it gave me a rush.
264
00:10:39,737 --> 00:10:41,530
Good.
Let's take the tour.
265
00:10:41,614 --> 00:10:43,449
- Yeah.
- Come on.
266
00:10:43,532 --> 00:10:45,534
This place is to be
a slaughterhouse
267
00:10:45,618 --> 00:10:46,619
up till the '70s.
268
00:10:46,702 --> 00:10:48,329
And then,
as legend has it,
269
00:10:48,412 --> 00:10:51,165
the animals revolted
against their tormentors
270
00:10:51,248 --> 00:10:52,583
and they slaughtered
the humans.
271
00:10:52,666 --> 00:10:54,126
Oh, my God.
272
00:10:54,209 --> 00:10:56,587
And my pal, Charles Norris,
you know him as Chuck,
273
00:10:56,670 --> 00:10:58,631
well, he needed a place
to train.
274
00:10:58,714 --> 00:11:00,591
I bought it.
I mentored him.
275
00:11:00,674 --> 00:11:03,093
And that's why he's the badass
that he is today.
276
00:11:03,177 --> 00:11:05,137
Hmm...
277
00:11:05,220 --> 00:11:10,976
Yeah, he nearly died
within these walls.
278
00:11:11,060 --> 00:11:15,189
And that's how Ron Wilcox
Action Star School got born.
279
00:11:15,272 --> 00:11:17,858
Ron Wilcox A.S.S.,
for short.
280
00:11:17,942 --> 00:11:19,526
What the fuck
did you just say to me?
281
00:11:24,573 --> 00:11:26,992
Did Matt Da...
Matt Damon, go here?
282
00:11:27,076 --> 00:11:31,288
Oh, Matty boy!
Fuck yeah, Matt Damon!
283
00:11:31,372 --> 00:11:33,290
Before he came to me,
he was a no name actor
284
00:11:33,374 --> 00:11:35,501
from New England.
He was nothing.
285
00:11:35,584 --> 00:11:38,879
He was a hundred pounds
soakin' wet.
286
00:11:38,963 --> 00:11:40,357
You sure we're talking about
the same Matt Damon?
287
00:11:40,381 --> 00:11:42,049
Hell yeah.
Matt Damon!
288
00:11:42,132 --> 00:11:44,760
Huh. Okay. Yeah...
289
00:11:44,843 --> 00:11:48,430
Un-unh. Rule number one,
no phones 'til you graduate.
290
00:11:48,514 --> 00:11:49,723
Okay.
I run an empire,
291
00:11:49,807 --> 00:11:50,909
so unfortunately,
I need my...
292
00:11:50,933 --> 00:11:52,202
Okay, fine,
you know what I'll do?
293
00:11:52,226 --> 00:11:53,328
I'll just call
Mr. Van De Velde,
294
00:11:53,352 --> 00:11:55,229
and I tell him,
"Oh, the phone policy
295
00:11:55,312 --> 00:11:58,273
"wasn't working for him.
It wasn't to his liking."
296
00:11:58,357 --> 00:12:00,275
I know what
you're gonna do with this.
297
00:12:00,359 --> 00:12:01,919
You're going to make calls
to Hollywood.
298
00:12:01,944 --> 00:12:03,612
You're gonna say,
"Hello, Hollywood.
299
00:12:03,696 --> 00:12:05,197
"Ron's school
is too tough for me.
300
00:12:05,280 --> 00:12:06,865
"I need more drugs."
- No.
301
00:12:06,949 --> 00:12:08,909
Yeah, you're gonna say,
"Oh, I'm Kevin Hart.
302
00:12:08,993 --> 00:12:11,203
"I need more caviar
and champagne."
303
00:12:11,286 --> 00:12:13,706
I just wanna talk
to my employees.
304
00:12:13,789 --> 00:12:15,916
That's fine,
but I'm still keeping it.
305
00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:17,751
Okay.
306
00:12:20,796 --> 00:12:22,840
Okay, until you graduate,
307
00:12:22,923 --> 00:12:25,259
you are forbidden from
visiting the outside world.
308
00:12:25,342 --> 00:12:27,594
You'll stay here.
- Say what?
309
00:12:27,678 --> 00:12:29,680
You got your bed,
you got your toilet,
310
00:12:29,763 --> 00:12:33,434
you got your sink.
All the modern amenities.
311
00:12:39,565 --> 00:12:41,108
Okay.
312
00:12:41,191 --> 00:12:43,652
It's supposed
to toughen me up.
313
00:12:43,736 --> 00:12:45,904
Okay, I get it.
314
00:12:45,988 --> 00:12:49,575
Yeah, I'm good with that.
315
00:12:49,658 --> 00:12:52,369
Yeah, might be a little
too good with it.
316
00:12:52,453 --> 00:12:56,415
And rule number two,
No fucking on the premises.
317
00:12:56,498 --> 00:12:59,043
No anal, no blowjobs,
no nothin'.
318
00:13:01,253 --> 00:13:04,798
Who else is here?
319
00:13:04,882 --> 00:13:06,717
Just me.
320
00:13:11,805 --> 00:13:13,557
Twenty minutes
'til lights out.
321
00:13:18,937 --> 00:13:20,064
So those...
322
00:13:20,147 --> 00:13:21,750
those two Colombian guys
that hit me in the head
323
00:13:21,774 --> 00:13:23,567
with the prop bat,
they were actors, right?
324
00:13:23,650 --> 00:13:26,070
Yeah, exactly.
325
00:13:26,153 --> 00:13:28,572
Okay, rule number three,
326
00:13:28,655 --> 00:13:31,450
When you're under this roof,
your name is no longer Kevin,
327
00:13:31,533 --> 00:13:33,911
it's Agent Hart,
and you'll refer to me
328
00:13:33,994 --> 00:13:37,915
as Ron Wilcox, or Ron,
or Wilcox, or Coach Ron.
329
00:13:37,998 --> 00:13:39,041
I like Coach Ron.
330
00:13:39,124 --> 00:13:40,793
- And I refer to you as...
- Agent Hart.
331
00:13:40,876 --> 00:13:41,876
- Right.
- Right.
332
00:13:41,919 --> 00:13:43,003
- Yes.
- See, I'm on it.
333
00:13:43,087 --> 00:13:45,380
Now I assume you got me in
this FBI jacket
334
00:13:45,464 --> 00:13:47,424
and stuff for a reason.
So, what is it?
335
00:13:47,508 --> 00:13:49,259
Hey, would you do me
a favor?
336
00:13:49,343 --> 00:13:50,511
Yeah.
337
00:13:50,594 --> 00:13:53,055
Kevin, would you
grab that chair for me?
338
00:13:53,138 --> 00:13:54,056
- Yeah.
- Would you?
339
00:13:54,139 --> 00:13:55,974
- You mean this one?
- No, goddammit!
340
00:13:56,058 --> 00:13:58,393
I said respond
only to Agent Hart!
341
00:13:58,477 --> 00:14:02,815
Fuck!
342
00:14:02,898 --> 00:14:04,983
You just said that.
I fucked up. I'm sorry.
343
00:14:05,067 --> 00:14:06,227
That's not gonna
happen again.
344
00:14:06,276 --> 00:14:07,569
Why don't you just
call me Kevin?
345
00:14:07,653 --> 00:14:09,530
Okay, in your life,
have you ever heard
346
00:14:09,613 --> 00:14:14,409
an action star leading man
ever called Kevin?
347
00:14:14,493 --> 00:14:15,893
I mean, Kevin James
in "Mall Cop".
348
00:14:15,953 --> 00:14:18,413
No, no. Kevin is the name
of a punk bitch.
349
00:14:18,497 --> 00:14:21,250
Ethan Hunt,
that is an action star name.
350
00:14:21,333 --> 00:14:23,252
Tom Cruise was my alumni.
351
00:14:23,335 --> 00:14:25,170
For nine years of his life,
352
00:14:25,254 --> 00:14:27,881
he only responded
to Ethan Hunt
353
00:14:27,965 --> 00:14:30,384
whether he was
on-camera or off-camera.
354
00:14:30,467 --> 00:14:32,761
Whether he was in the shower,
or on the toilet.
355
00:14:32,845 --> 00:14:34,471
Whether he was fucking,
or not fucking.
356
00:14:34,555 --> 00:14:35,806
- Okay, I...
- If he was even...
357
00:14:35,889 --> 00:14:39,685
- I understand, Coach Ron!
- Do you? Do you really?
358
00:14:39,768 --> 00:14:43,021
I hope so, for your sake.
359
00:14:43,105 --> 00:14:45,816
Because your life
depends on it.
360
00:14:45,899 --> 00:14:48,402
Okay, next lesson.
361
00:14:48,485 --> 00:14:50,362
Every leading man
needs to know
362
00:14:50,445 --> 00:14:52,156
how to run into
a burning building
363
00:14:52,239 --> 00:14:53,574
and save a stranger.
- Hmm.
364
00:14:58,912 --> 00:15:00,455
Wow!
365
00:15:00,539 --> 00:15:02,583
Holy shit.
How'd you do that, man?
366
00:15:02,666 --> 00:15:05,252
And the stranger that
we are going to save today
367
00:15:05,335 --> 00:15:09,965
is our own action star dummy,
little Kevin.
368
00:15:11,592 --> 00:15:14,344
- That's supposed to be me?
- I don't see the resemblance.
369
00:15:14,428 --> 00:15:15,596
Are you fucking kidding?
370
00:15:15,679 --> 00:15:18,599
No, w-we've had this dummy
for years, buddy.
371
00:15:18,682 --> 00:15:21,560
- Oh, hell, no.
- Bitch, that's my line.
372
00:15:21,643 --> 00:15:23,288
I've said that line in,
like, twelve movies.
373
00:15:23,312 --> 00:15:24,855
Agent Hart,
are you a narcissist?
374
00:15:24,938 --> 00:15:26,273
No.
375
00:15:26,356 --> 00:15:27,584
Do you think the whole world
is all about you?
376
00:15:27,608 --> 00:15:29,151
- That's not... I'm not...
- No.
377
00:15:29,234 --> 00:15:31,195
You look at you
and then you look at him.
378
00:15:31,278 --> 00:15:33,158
- That's what...
- Look at you, and look at him.
379
00:15:33,238 --> 00:15:36,617
Do you see any resemblance?
- Kind of sort of, man!
380
00:15:36,700 --> 00:15:39,786
O-Okay, all right.
Okay, maybe I'm crazy.
381
00:15:39,870 --> 00:15:41,788
Help!
Help me!
382
00:15:41,872 --> 00:15:45,209
Oh, hell no!
Help! Help me!
383
00:15:45,292 --> 00:15:46,835
Oh, hell no!
384
00:15:46,919 --> 00:15:49,546
Now, safety during stunts
is of the utmost importance.
385
00:15:49,630 --> 00:15:51,232
Yeah, but I mean,
that's why you got stuntmen,
386
00:15:51,256 --> 00:15:54,301
right?
- Watch it.
387
00:15:54,384 --> 00:15:55,928
No, for the other guys,
not for me.
388
00:15:56,011 --> 00:15:58,138
T-the lightweights.
I don't...
389
00:15:58,222 --> 00:16:01,099
Okay, your jacket
is flame retardant,
390
00:16:01,183 --> 00:16:03,101
which means that
if you catch on fire,
391
00:16:03,185 --> 00:16:06,146
don't panic, I will come in
and put you out.
392
00:16:06,230 --> 00:16:08,690
Okay.
Y-You're gonna...
393
00:16:08,774 --> 00:16:10,460
Okay, I feel-I feel good...
I feel good about that.
394
00:16:10,484 --> 00:16:13,278
When you're ready,
I want you to storm the house,
395
00:16:13,362 --> 00:16:16,031
find the victim,
and bring him to safety.
396
00:16:18,492 --> 00:16:20,327
What is that?
397
00:16:20,410 --> 00:16:21,954
What are you doing?
I do...
398
00:16:22,037 --> 00:16:24,623
Psyching myself up.
399
00:16:30,837 --> 00:16:33,548
It's hot!
Hot!
400
00:16:46,019 --> 00:16:47,854
It's fucking hot!
401
00:16:47,938 --> 00:16:50,732
Where the fuck are you at?
Oh, God.
402
00:16:50,816 --> 00:16:53,568
Oh, fuck, I can't see shit!
403
00:16:53,652 --> 00:16:55,779
Little Kev?
404
00:16:55,862 --> 00:16:58,699
Excuse me,
are you Ron Wilcox?
405
00:16:58,782 --> 00:17:00,826
Oh, hello.
How are you?
406
00:17:00,909 --> 00:17:03,120
- Jordan King.
- We've been waiting for you.
407
00:17:03,203 --> 00:17:05,330
Help! Help me!
408
00:17:05,414 --> 00:17:07,207
- I've got you, little Kev.
- Oh, hell no!
409
00:17:07,291 --> 00:17:09,334
I'm about to save
your little beautiful black ass.
410
00:17:09,418 --> 00:17:12,087
Help! Help me!
411
00:17:12,170 --> 00:17:13,755
Oh, hell no!
412
00:17:13,839 --> 00:17:15,007
What the fuck?
413
00:17:15,090 --> 00:17:16,883
Who is this?
- Help! Help me!
414
00:17:16,967 --> 00:17:19,511
Oh, hell no!
- What the...
415
00:17:19,594 --> 00:17:22,931
Help! Help me!
Oh, hell no!
416
00:17:23,015 --> 00:17:24,725
It's fucking hot!
417
00:17:24,808 --> 00:17:26,018
Get your ass up.
418
00:17:26,101 --> 00:17:28,520
Yeah, um,
I'm just so nervous.
419
00:17:28,603 --> 00:17:30,897
I've never been in
an action movie before.
420
00:17:30,981 --> 00:17:32,524
I just wanna bring
my A-game here.
421
00:17:32,607 --> 00:17:34,693
- 90% is mental, okay?
- Oh, shit... Oh, shit!
422
00:17:34,776 --> 00:17:37,362
You are gonna be fantastic.
423
00:17:37,446 --> 00:17:39,906
I just know it.
- Oh, shit.
424
00:17:39,990 --> 00:17:42,075
Is he okay?
- Oh, God.
425
00:17:42,159 --> 00:17:44,202
You leave this guy alone
for five seconds.
426
00:17:44,286 --> 00:17:45,537
Geez.
- Put me out! Put me out!
427
00:17:45,620 --> 00:17:48,165
Put me out! Put me out!
Put me out!
428
00:17:51,460 --> 00:17:53,545
- Is he okay?
- Oh, he's fine.
429
00:17:53,628 --> 00:17:55,213
Gal Gadot was training with me,
430
00:17:55,297 --> 00:17:57,049
she was on fire
for twelve minutes.
431
00:17:57,132 --> 00:17:59,259
She put herself out
with a blanket.
432
00:17:59,343 --> 00:18:01,887
He barely lasted
twelve seconds.
433
00:18:01,970 --> 00:18:03,638
Is this funny to you?
434
00:18:03,722 --> 00:18:06,767
Hey, a leading man must learn
not to sweat the small stuff.
435
00:18:06,850 --> 00:18:08,610
What are you talking about
the small stuff?
436
00:18:08,685 --> 00:18:10,520
I was on fucking fire,
Coach Ron!
437
00:18:10,604 --> 00:18:12,022
Hey, knock it off!
438
00:18:12,105 --> 00:18:14,399
There's a lady present,
and I want you to meet her.
439
00:18:14,483 --> 00:18:16,651
Agent Hart,
this is Agent Jordan King.
440
00:18:16,735 --> 00:18:17,778
She'll be your bunkmate.
441
00:18:17,861 --> 00:18:19,404
It is a pleasure
to meet you.
442
00:18:19,488 --> 00:18:21,049
My pleasure.
Okay, you wanna explain to me
443
00:18:21,073 --> 00:18:22,866
why she get
this nice introduction?
444
00:18:22,949 --> 00:18:24,719
Why isn't she getting
hit in the head with a bat?
445
00:18:24,743 --> 00:18:26,411
When are you gonna bop her?
- Excuse me?
446
00:18:26,495 --> 00:18:28,789
Okay, you know, just...
447
00:18:28,872 --> 00:18:31,166
When he does this kind of thing,
I just zone him out.
448
00:18:31,249 --> 00:18:33,311
When he starts to whine.
Come on, I'll give you a tour.
449
00:18:33,335 --> 00:18:35,462
Okay.
450
00:18:35,545 --> 00:18:37,231
Now, this used to be
a slaughterhouse years ago,
451
00:18:37,255 --> 00:18:38,632
up until the 70's...
452
00:18:43,553 --> 00:18:45,389
...which brings me
to rule number two.
453
00:18:45,472 --> 00:18:48,308
There'll be no sexual
intercourse on the premises.
454
00:18:48,392 --> 00:18:52,687
Uh, yeah, um,
that won't be a problem.
455
00:18:55,148 --> 00:18:57,401
I didn't think it would be.
456
00:18:57,484 --> 00:19:01,196
I know you have to say it.
I-It's fine, we're good.
457
00:19:01,279 --> 00:19:03,115
All right.
So, hey, take a beat, okay?
458
00:19:03,198 --> 00:19:05,242
Relax, and we'll see you
out in twenty
459
00:19:05,325 --> 00:19:07,619
on the training ground, okay?
460
00:19:07,702 --> 00:19:09,037
Thanks, Ron.
You're the best.
461
00:19:09,121 --> 00:19:12,165
Hey, it's a pleasure.
462
00:19:15,710 --> 00:19:18,380
He's a fucking sociopath.
463
00:19:18,463 --> 00:19:21,091
- How do you mean?
- How do I mean?
464
00:19:21,174 --> 00:19:22,676
Do you really wanna know
how I mean?
465
00:19:22,759 --> 00:19:23,778
Because I was here
a couple days ago
466
00:19:23,802 --> 00:19:25,137
and shit hit the fan.
467
00:19:25,220 --> 00:19:26,614
There was a guy in here
accusing him
468
00:19:26,638 --> 00:19:28,849
of murdering some dude
named Rodrigo.
469
00:19:28,932 --> 00:19:30,684
- Rodrigo?
- Yes, Rodrigo.
470
00:19:30,767 --> 00:19:31,768
Saw a whole thing.
471
00:19:31,852 --> 00:19:33,121
And when I first
walked in this bitch,
472
00:19:33,145 --> 00:19:34,771
they hit me in the head
with a bat.
473
00:19:34,855 --> 00:19:37,357
Not no plastic bat.
With a fucking metal bat!
474
00:19:37,441 --> 00:19:40,026
And today, today he let me
catch myself on fire!
475
00:19:40,110 --> 00:19:42,654
"Let me catch
myself on fire"?
476
00:19:42,737 --> 00:19:43,965
I don't know why
you gotta sound it out.
477
00:19:43,989 --> 00:19:47,200
Yes. Let me catch...
no, I see why you did that.
478
00:19:47,284 --> 00:19:48,660
Because if you slow it down,
479
00:19:48,743 --> 00:19:49,578
you slow down,
it don't sound right.
480
00:19:49,661 --> 00:19:50,996
But you get what I'm saying.
481
00:19:51,079 --> 00:19:53,373
It happened.
It fucking happened.
482
00:19:53,457 --> 00:19:54,624
Look, I'm sorry, all right?
483
00:19:54,708 --> 00:19:56,251
It's just,
I don't have my phone,
484
00:19:56,334 --> 00:19:58,211
it's weird in here,
485
00:19:58,295 --> 00:19:59,480
and stuff is just starting to
fuck with me.
486
00:19:59,504 --> 00:20:02,215
Maybe-maybe I'm going
a little stir crazy.
487
00:20:02,299 --> 00:20:04,551
I don't know.
488
00:20:04,634 --> 00:20:08,555
That's shit.
That's shit water.
489
00:20:08,638 --> 00:20:10,682
Yep, God damn.
490
00:20:10,765 --> 00:20:14,436
Well, you're
not alone anymore, so...
491
00:20:14,519 --> 00:20:20,233
Yeah, well, maybe, but...
Hey, do I know you?
492
00:20:20,317 --> 00:20:23,528
Oh.
493
00:20:23,612 --> 00:20:26,490
I do!
Fuck!
494
00:20:26,573 --> 00:20:28,783
You're the girl from
that sitcom with the robot.
495
00:20:28,867 --> 00:20:30,136
The robot that was
a butler, right?
496
00:20:30,160 --> 00:20:31,262
You used to argue
with the butler,
497
00:20:31,286 --> 00:20:33,246
"Uh-uh,
get the fuck out of here".
498
00:20:33,330 --> 00:20:35,373
You'd do the thing,
"Butler, bitch".
499
00:20:35,457 --> 00:20:37,501
Yeah, yeah.
- Yeah.
500
00:20:37,584 --> 00:20:39,211
- That's me.
- Wow.
501
00:20:39,294 --> 00:20:42,506
Well, was.
I just quit.
502
00:20:42,589 --> 00:20:45,258
Kathryn Bigelow offered me
the lead in her next movie,
503
00:20:45,342 --> 00:20:48,136
which is huge, since there are,
like, what,
504
00:20:48,220 --> 00:20:50,680
three total action roles
for women?
505
00:20:50,764 --> 00:20:52,349
Oh, it's a lot
more than that.
506
00:20:52,432 --> 00:20:55,310
But congrats.
507
00:20:55,393 --> 00:20:58,522
Are you... I mean,
you want me to name 'em?
508
00:20:58,605 --> 00:21:00,645
I can go down the list.
You got Wonder Woman, right?
509
00:21:00,690 --> 00:21:02,150
You know, the Black Widow.
510
00:21:02,234 --> 00:21:07,072
You got, um, what was the one
with the woman with the, uh...
511
00:21:07,155 --> 00:21:11,201
she's, uh... what's...
that's three.
512
00:21:11,284 --> 00:21:15,539
Anyway, um, it's all riding on
this action school.
513
00:21:15,622 --> 00:21:17,707
I've just gotta prove to Ron
that I've got the chops,
514
00:21:17,791 --> 00:21:18,959
that I'm fit enough.
515
00:21:19,042 --> 00:21:20,877
You ain't gotta
prove that to nobody.
516
00:21:20,961 --> 00:21:23,046
You are fit.
517
00:21:23,129 --> 00:21:26,716
When you walked in that door
I said, "God damn."
518
00:21:26,800 --> 00:21:28,677
Not like that.
519
00:21:28,760 --> 00:21:31,596
I'm not saying it like that.
I don't mean it that way.
520
00:21:31,680 --> 00:21:33,040
- I'm just here to train...
- Yeah.
521
00:21:33,098 --> 00:21:36,101
...not make friends.
So, just to be clear.
522
00:21:36,184 --> 00:21:38,436
We're-we're here for
the same thing, right?
523
00:21:38,520 --> 00:21:39,604
Fuck friendship.
- Good.
524
00:21:39,688 --> 00:21:42,482
Yeah.
525
00:21:42,566 --> 00:21:44,646
- Mind if I use the bathroom?
- Do what you gotta do.
526
00:21:44,693 --> 00:21:46,194
The bathroom right there.
527
00:21:46,278 --> 00:21:49,739
Yeah, I'm gonna
need you to just...
528
00:21:49,823 --> 00:21:53,743
Oh. You gotta shit.
529
00:21:56,329 --> 00:21:58,748
Now in this lesson,
we're going to focus
530
00:21:58,832 --> 00:22:02,377
and explore the action star's
motivations.
531
00:22:02,460 --> 00:22:04,754
Agent King,
what is your motivation?
532
00:22:04,838 --> 00:22:06,506
After working undercover
in Paris,
533
00:22:06,590 --> 00:22:08,383
I go down to the basement
of the Louvre,
534
00:22:08,466 --> 00:22:11,344
where I thwart the theft of
an ancient Egyptian artifact
535
00:22:11,428 --> 00:22:13,597
when I'm accosted by
a rogue agent.
536
00:22:13,680 --> 00:22:16,057
- Good, Agent Hart.
- Accost?
537
00:22:16,141 --> 00:22:17,201
That's a little strong,
isn't it?
538
00:22:17,225 --> 00:22:21,313
What the fuck?
Focus. Focus.
539
00:22:21,396 --> 00:22:24,107
And...
540
00:22:24,190 --> 00:22:26,026
Okay, all right.
I-I'm an agent.
541
00:22:26,109 --> 00:22:28,737
- Yes.
- I'm an agent, and, um,
542
00:22:28,820 --> 00:22:31,698
basically, I gotta-I gotta
go get Agent King.
543
00:22:31,781 --> 00:22:34,618
I gotta seduce...
I gotta seduce Agent King
544
00:22:34,701 --> 00:22:36,161
in the basement of the Louvre.
545
00:22:36,244 --> 00:22:37,954
And just a question,
is this, like,
546
00:22:38,038 --> 00:22:40,915
some James Bond fan fiction?
- And, action.
547
00:22:49,132 --> 00:22:51,801
Agent King?
548
00:22:51,885 --> 00:22:55,013
- Who wants to know?
- Agent Hart.
549
00:22:55,096 --> 00:22:57,432
Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah.
550
00:22:57,515 --> 00:22:59,351
Not so fast.
551
00:22:59,434 --> 00:23:01,895
Look, you're in great danger,
552
00:23:01,978 --> 00:23:05,190
and the only cure for it
is to come with me to my bed.
553
00:23:10,612 --> 00:23:12,572
Seduce her,
god damn it!
554
00:23:13,990 --> 00:23:17,786
Seduce her.
Lure her into the car.
555
00:23:25,085 --> 00:23:27,462
In the car.
556
00:23:27,545 --> 00:23:29,631
In my car.
557
00:23:29,714 --> 00:23:32,717
Fucking creep.
558
00:23:41,434 --> 00:23:43,162
- What the fuck was that?
- Beautiful, beautiful.
559
00:23:43,186 --> 00:23:44,562
Keep going.
Keep going.
560
00:23:44,646 --> 00:23:46,648
What the fuck you mean,
"Keep going"?
561
00:23:46,731 --> 00:23:47,982
What the fuck, man?
562
00:23:48,066 --> 00:23:49,460
Do you have a problem,
Agent Hart?
563
00:23:49,484 --> 00:23:50,503
Yeah, I got a problem,
motherfucker!
564
00:23:50,527 --> 00:23:51,820
What is it?
565
00:23:51,903 --> 00:23:53,339
She's Bruce Lee,
and I'm some weird creeper.
566
00:23:53,363 --> 00:23:55,448
Oh, it's too challenging
for you to seduce her.
567
00:23:55,532 --> 00:23:57,325
Is that it?
- Uh, yes, it is.
568
00:23:57,409 --> 00:23:59,452
When you got me, looking...
569
00:24:02,789 --> 00:24:05,250
I see what you're doing.
570
00:24:05,333 --> 00:24:07,168
You're trying to get me
all riled up.
571
00:24:07,252 --> 00:24:08,252
It's not gonna work.
572
00:24:08,294 --> 00:24:09,921
I'm not falling for
your little trap
573
00:24:10,004 --> 00:24:10,922
and I'm not going
back over here
574
00:24:11,005 --> 00:24:12,841
to fight this
fucking jujitsu master
575
00:24:12,924 --> 00:24:14,134
with sexy talk.
576
00:24:14,217 --> 00:24:16,302
Oh, you want
a change of motivation?
577
00:24:16,386 --> 00:24:17,429
- Yeah, I do.
- Okay.
578
00:24:17,512 --> 00:24:19,222
This is your new motivation.
579
00:24:19,305 --> 00:24:21,891
She's a Russian mole
pretending to be an FBI agent.
580
00:24:21,975 --> 00:24:25,687
You eliminate her with this.
581
00:24:25,770 --> 00:24:29,023
- It's a prop knife, right?
- Retractable.
582
00:24:29,107 --> 00:24:31,693
Now go in there and
show her who's boss.
583
00:24:31,776 --> 00:24:35,155
Now we're fucking talking.
584
00:24:35,238 --> 00:24:37,407
You said
she's a Russian mole, right?
585
00:24:37,490 --> 00:24:40,326
Okay, I don't like that.
Down goes the mole, huh?
586
00:24:45,498 --> 00:24:47,667
Shit!
Oh, god damn it.
587
00:24:47,751 --> 00:24:50,253
Hey, I'm about to stab you
in the side, okay?
588
00:24:50,336 --> 00:24:54,174
With...
it's a prop knife.
589
00:24:54,257 --> 00:24:55,425
What the?
590
00:24:55,508 --> 00:24:57,469
Oh, you gotta sell it.
Make it look real.
591
00:25:03,183 --> 00:25:05,477
Ah, what the fuck?
592
00:25:05,560 --> 00:25:08,563
Ah!
- Real blood.
593
00:25:08,646 --> 00:25:11,065
- Oh, my God.
- What have you done to her?
594
00:25:11,149 --> 00:25:13,526
What have you done to her?
- I'm so sorry.
595
00:25:13,610 --> 00:25:15,490
I thought-I thought you said
it was retractable.
596
00:25:15,528 --> 00:25:17,238
I said it was practical.
597
00:25:17,322 --> 00:25:19,532
It's a practical knife!
It's a real knife!
598
00:25:19,616 --> 00:25:20,658
- Oh, my God.
- Oh God.
599
00:25:20,742 --> 00:25:22,494
She's passing out now.
- Oh, shit!
600
00:25:22,577 --> 00:25:23,596
I'm gonna have to
stitch her up.
601
00:25:23,620 --> 00:25:24,930
I've got a medical kit
in my office.
602
00:25:24,954 --> 00:25:26,056
- Fine, I will grab it.
- No!
603
00:25:26,080 --> 00:25:28,166
- Ow, ow, ow.
- Go to your room.
604
00:25:28,249 --> 00:25:29,250
You're grounded!
- No.
605
00:25:29,334 --> 00:25:30,168
What are you talking about?
I'll go grab it.
606
00:25:30,251 --> 00:25:32,378
No!
607
00:25:32,462 --> 00:25:35,423
My office is off limits
to students.
608
00:25:41,721 --> 00:25:45,433
I said my office
is off limits.
609
00:25:45,517 --> 00:25:47,227
If you disobey me again,
610
00:25:47,310 --> 00:25:49,354
the next time
I throw that knife
611
00:25:49,437 --> 00:25:51,189
will be through
your fucking skull.
612
00:26:02,408 --> 00:26:04,786
Hey.
613
00:26:04,869 --> 00:26:07,580
I brought you some breakfast
as a peace offering.
614
00:26:07,664 --> 00:26:09,207
The food here
is a little tricky.
615
00:26:09,290 --> 00:26:11,501
It's just a closet
full of beef jerky.
616
00:26:11,584 --> 00:26:13,086
Apparently,
Macho Man Randy Savage
617
00:26:13,169 --> 00:26:16,214
was an alum here and
he left his entire food supply
618
00:26:16,297 --> 00:26:18,508
to Ron in his will, so...
619
00:26:18,591 --> 00:26:21,427
Snap into a Slim Jim?
620
00:26:21,511 --> 00:26:23,179
Care to join me
for breakfast?
621
00:26:23,263 --> 00:26:27,141
Of course.
Jerky for two.
622
00:26:27,225 --> 00:26:28,810
Hmm.
623
00:26:28,893 --> 00:26:33,022
Um, look,
I'm going to apologize.
624
00:26:34,649 --> 00:26:36,234
You know, I didn't mean to...
- Stab me?
625
00:26:36,317 --> 00:26:38,361
Well, I wasn't
gonna use those words.
626
00:26:38,444 --> 00:26:40,864
Look, Ron...
Ron is crazy.
627
00:26:40,947 --> 00:26:43,241
I'm serious.
He's-he's nuts.
628
00:26:43,324 --> 00:26:45,410
Sick in the head crazy.
629
00:26:45,493 --> 00:26:47,579
And I'm convinced that
that motherfucker
630
00:26:47,662 --> 00:26:49,497
killed a dude named Rodrigo.
631
00:26:49,581 --> 00:26:51,082
And the motherfucker
tried to kill me
632
00:26:51,165 --> 00:26:52,834
just for being
around his office.
633
00:26:52,917 --> 00:26:55,920
And as far as your arm goes,
I know you think I'm lying,
634
00:26:56,004 --> 00:26:57,630
I heard retractable.
635
00:26:57,714 --> 00:26:59,757
You know, I've dated
guys like you before.
636
00:26:59,841 --> 00:27:02,093
It's always
someone else's fault.
637
00:27:02,176 --> 00:27:03,678
That's not true.
638
00:27:03,761 --> 00:27:05,889
That's not true at all.
When I'm wrong, I...
639
00:27:05,972 --> 00:27:07,366
I shouldn't say that,
'cause I'm never wrong.
640
00:27:07,390 --> 00:27:09,058
If... If I'm wrong,
641
00:27:09,142 --> 00:27:11,352
I have no problem admitting
that I'm wrong.
642
00:27:11,436 --> 00:27:15,356
But in this case, I'm not.
He said "retractable."
643
00:27:15,440 --> 00:27:18,776
Hey, part of me
is glad you stabbed me.
644
00:27:18,860 --> 00:27:20,987
It's a badge of honor.
645
00:27:21,070 --> 00:27:23,448
I heard when Jason Statham
came through here,
646
00:27:23,531 --> 00:27:25,909
he got stabbed
directly in the heart.
647
00:27:25,992 --> 00:27:26,993
Did he survive that?
648
00:27:27,076 --> 00:27:29,162
He shot "Transporter"
like a week later.
649
00:27:29,245 --> 00:27:31,706
What the fuck?
In the heart?
650
00:27:31,789 --> 00:27:33,142
They stabbed him in the heart?
- Yup, right through it.
651
00:27:33,166 --> 00:27:34,709
God damn it.
652
00:27:34,792 --> 00:27:37,045
Maybe I'm just doing
the wrong fucking thing here.
653
00:27:37,128 --> 00:27:41,758
I mean, maybe this just
isn't for me, you know?
654
00:27:41,841 --> 00:27:44,636
So just leave.
Go home.
655
00:27:44,719 --> 00:27:46,512
I'm sure
there's a real hero somewhere
656
00:27:46,596 --> 00:27:49,682
in need of a goofy sidekick.
- Okay, that backfired.
657
00:27:49,766 --> 00:27:51,327
I thought that you would
go the opposite direction
658
00:27:51,351 --> 00:27:53,645
and tell me that,
no, I should stay.
659
00:27:53,728 --> 00:27:55,772
And that this is for me.
660
00:27:55,855 --> 00:27:57,732
That's what I thought.
661
00:27:57,815 --> 00:27:59,126
Well what do you
want me to say?
662
00:27:59,150 --> 00:28:01,486
If you need extra motivation
to be the star
663
00:28:01,569 --> 00:28:06,115
of a Claude Van De Velde movie,
you're in the wrong business.
664
00:28:06,199 --> 00:28:09,452
This is probably my only shot
to be a big action star,
665
00:28:09,535 --> 00:28:12,080
so I'm not gonna blow it.
666
00:28:12,163 --> 00:28:14,666
I'll do anything it takes.
667
00:28:17,502 --> 00:28:19,837
You're right.
668
00:28:19,921 --> 00:28:23,216
You are absolutely right.
669
00:28:23,299 --> 00:28:25,301
I need to stop
all the bitching and moaning.
670
00:28:25,385 --> 00:28:27,470
I need to cowboy the fuck up.
671
00:28:27,553 --> 00:28:30,723
There you go.
672
00:28:34,268 --> 00:28:35,853
When I first started
in the business
673
00:28:35,937 --> 00:28:37,563
training action stars,
674
00:28:37,647 --> 00:28:40,066
every stunt scene was practical,
675
00:28:40,149 --> 00:28:43,236
or as Kevin might say,
retractable.
676
00:28:43,319 --> 00:28:45,238
Oh, that's really good.
That's great.
677
00:28:45,321 --> 00:28:46,197
It's not funny.
678
00:28:46,280 --> 00:28:47,466
But the industry
has changed.
679
00:28:47,490 --> 00:28:48,950
You can't even be
an action star
680
00:28:49,033 --> 00:28:51,452
without, well,
knowing how to work green.
681
00:28:51,536 --> 00:28:54,122
I'm very familiar
with a green screen.
682
00:28:54,205 --> 00:28:55,707
I mean, I've done about
15 movies
683
00:28:55,790 --> 00:28:57,250
where we've had a green screen.
684
00:28:57,333 --> 00:28:59,919
In which of those 15 movies
were you the leading man?
685
00:29:00,003 --> 00:29:01,921
Any idiot can jump
on a green screen
686
00:29:02,005 --> 00:29:04,799
and pretend to be eaten by
a CG dragon.
687
00:29:04,882 --> 00:29:06,718
Hell, even little Kevin
can do that.
688
00:29:06,801 --> 00:29:08,094
Oh, hell no!
689
00:29:08,177 --> 00:29:10,847
Okay, who's finding the time
to dress him like me?
690
00:29:10,930 --> 00:29:12,098
It's really...
691
00:29:12,181 --> 00:29:14,017
Okay, question,
what does a leading woman,
692
00:29:14,100 --> 00:29:16,894
or leading man,
get to do onscreen
693
00:29:16,978 --> 00:29:19,188
that sidekicks don't?
- Win fights.
694
00:29:19,272 --> 00:29:22,400
- Murder bad guys.
- Make love.
695
00:29:22,483 --> 00:29:25,028
Today's lesson
is in love making.
696
00:29:25,111 --> 00:29:27,613
Yes!
On the green screen.
697
00:29:27,697 --> 00:29:29,240
Are we doing it
on the green screen?
698
00:29:29,323 --> 00:29:30,783
- Bingo.
- Nice.
699
00:29:30,867 --> 00:29:33,536
Adding effects to the bed,
to the walls, cracking 'em.
700
00:29:33,619 --> 00:29:34,912
Okay, I'm gonna be candid,
701
00:29:34,996 --> 00:29:37,540
I don't want to do
a sex scene with him.
702
00:29:37,623 --> 00:29:38,791
That's fine,
703
00:29:38,875 --> 00:29:39,709
'cause I don't wanna do
a sex scene with her.
704
00:29:39,834 --> 00:29:41,878
Ugh.
705
00:29:45,882 --> 00:29:47,216
What's so funny?
706
00:29:47,300 --> 00:29:49,802
Okay, well, look at you,
and then look at her.
707
00:29:49,886 --> 00:29:53,056
And look at you, then her.
Then you, then her.
708
00:29:53,139 --> 00:29:54,307
Okay, I don't get the joke.
709
00:29:54,390 --> 00:29:55,641
What is it?
What am I missing?
710
00:29:55,725 --> 00:29:57,077
All right,
let me put it another way.
711
00:29:57,101 --> 00:30:00,646
Uh, look at you,
and then look at her.
712
00:30:00,730 --> 00:30:02,148
Then look at you,
and then her.
713
00:30:02,231 --> 00:30:05,234
Can we just get this shit
over with, please?
714
00:30:05,318 --> 00:30:07,695
Okay, let's discuss
motivation.
715
00:30:07,779 --> 00:30:11,115
All right, now, after
almost killing each other,
716
00:30:11,199 --> 00:30:13,159
Agent Hart and Agent King
717
00:30:13,242 --> 00:30:15,203
discover that they're
on the same team.
718
00:30:15,286 --> 00:30:18,247
After defusing a bomb
at the top of a skyscraper
719
00:30:18,331 --> 00:30:20,792
in-in the middle of
an earthquake,
720
00:30:20,875 --> 00:30:23,336
you discover
this overwhelming passion
721
00:30:23,419 --> 00:30:25,379
for each other.
722
00:30:26,214 --> 00:30:27,340
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
723
00:30:27,423 --> 00:30:28,663
We're at the top
of a skyscraper
724
00:30:28,716 --> 00:30:29,550
in the middle
of an earthquake?
725
00:30:29,634 --> 00:30:31,719
Yes! Yes! Goddamn it!
726
00:30:31,803 --> 00:30:33,963
You are the dumbest actor
that I have ever worked with.
727
00:30:34,013 --> 00:30:35,765
Go! Action!
728
00:30:37,517 --> 00:30:39,268
Red wire or blue wire?
729
00:30:39,352 --> 00:30:40,603
It's gotta be the red.
730
00:30:40,686 --> 00:30:41,687
Are you sure?
731
00:30:41,771 --> 00:30:44,232
Agent Hart, are you sure?
- I don't know.
732
00:31:10,049 --> 00:31:11,968
Earthquake! Earthquake!
733
00:31:12,051 --> 00:31:13,344
The building's falling apart!
734
00:31:13,427 --> 00:31:15,596
- Oh, uh, Okay, um...
- Okay.
735
00:31:15,680 --> 00:31:17,557
Good... great.
736
00:31:17,640 --> 00:31:19,100
Oh! Oh! Oh!
737
00:31:19,183 --> 00:31:21,561
Oh! Shit!
Hold on.
738
00:31:21,644 --> 00:31:23,479
Wait... Oh.
739
00:31:23,563 --> 00:31:24,998
Where you at?
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
740
00:31:25,022 --> 00:31:26,023
- Kevin.
- Hold on, wait!
741
00:31:26,107 --> 00:31:27,608
Give me a second.
Shit!
742
00:31:27,692 --> 00:31:28,943
- Okay.
- Okay.
743
00:31:29,026 --> 00:31:30,546
All right, come on.
It's an earthquake.
744
00:31:30,611 --> 00:31:31,612
It's an earthquake, fuck.
745
00:31:31,696 --> 00:31:33,281
- Yeah.
- Go.
746
00:31:33,364 --> 00:31:36,159
Agent Hart, I can't believe
we just diffused that bomb.
747
00:31:36,242 --> 00:31:38,452
We just saved thousands
of lives, maybe millions.
748
00:31:38,536 --> 00:31:42,123
This earthquake's gotta be
about a 7.5 magnitude.
749
00:31:42,206 --> 00:31:45,751
This could be our last time
being together before we die.
750
00:31:45,835 --> 00:31:48,838
Now kiss her neck softly
and start fucking.
751
00:31:48,921 --> 00:31:50,631
What? Wait.
752
00:31:50,715 --> 00:31:52,383
Kiss-kiss her neck
and then start fucking?
753
00:31:52,466 --> 00:31:54,844
Kiss her neck softly
and start fucking!
754
00:31:54,927 --> 00:31:57,305
Oh, okay.
755
00:31:57,388 --> 00:31:58,740
I'm just gonna do it,
'cause that's what he's...
756
00:31:58,764 --> 00:32:00,016
Yeah, no, it's fine.
757
00:32:00,099 --> 00:32:01,893
Yeah, put your...
Give me that.
758
00:32:01,976 --> 00:32:04,103
Be sexy!
Do something!
759
00:32:04,187 --> 00:32:05,664
- Grab my leg.
- Yeah, give me this one.
760
00:32:05,688 --> 00:32:07,565
Have you never
had sex before?
761
00:32:07,648 --> 00:32:08,900
Do it!
762
00:32:08,983 --> 00:32:10,502
- That's not...
- We need to be upright.
763
00:32:10,526 --> 00:32:11,587
One second, that's it.
- Give me that.
764
00:32:11,611 --> 00:32:13,279
Go! Go!
765
00:32:13,362 --> 00:32:16,407
Agent Hart, no.
We shouldn't do this.
766
00:32:16,490 --> 00:32:19,410
It's against Bureau
protocol.
767
00:32:19,493 --> 00:32:21,871
Well, protocol was
meant to be broken.
768
00:32:24,999 --> 00:32:27,418
Ah, whoa!
Ah, help!
769
00:32:27,501 --> 00:32:29,337
Help! Don't drop me!
Don't drop me!
770
00:32:29,420 --> 00:32:30,838
Please don't let go!
Don't let go!
771
00:32:30,922 --> 00:32:32,089
I won't, I've got you.
772
00:32:32,173 --> 00:32:34,425
- Don't let go!
- I've got you, I promise.
773
00:32:34,508 --> 00:32:36,510
Can you push in
a little closer?
774
00:32:36,594 --> 00:32:38,346
Help me! Help me!
775
00:32:38,429 --> 00:32:39,847
I'm too young to die.
776
00:32:39,931 --> 00:32:41,933
Any closer, they'll
see the cameras.
777
00:32:42,016 --> 00:32:43,851
Okay, good, hold there.
778
00:32:43,935 --> 00:32:45,645
- I got you.
- Perfect.
779
00:32:45,728 --> 00:32:47,104
- Help!
- Kevin,
780
00:32:47,188 --> 00:32:48,981
you're like one foot
off the ground.
781
00:32:49,065 --> 00:32:51,234
You cannot teach
acting like that.
782
00:32:51,317 --> 00:32:52,794
I'm just gonna
let you down, okay?
783
00:32:52,818 --> 00:32:54,237
Ah!
784
00:32:58,699 --> 00:33:00,910
Okay, lights out,
twenty minutes.
785
00:33:00,993 --> 00:33:02,912
No funny business.
786
00:33:02,995 --> 00:33:04,789
And no fucking!
787
00:33:13,005 --> 00:33:14,340
Now do you believe me?
788
00:33:14,423 --> 00:33:16,801
He's a fucking psychopath.
789
00:33:16,884 --> 00:33:19,095
Okay, it does seem like
an odd coincidence
790
00:33:19,178 --> 00:33:20,763
your wires just snapped.
791
00:33:20,846 --> 00:33:22,807
Coincidence?
792
00:33:22,890 --> 00:33:26,060
Those lines are strong enough
to hold a goddamn elephant.
793
00:33:26,143 --> 00:33:28,271
Where's your phone at?
- He confiscated it.
794
00:33:44,328 --> 00:33:47,331
Kevin, he said lights out.
We can't leave.
795
00:33:47,415 --> 00:33:48,916
He's not
my camp counselor.
796
00:33:49,000 --> 00:33:50,126
You know what I'm gonna do?
797
00:33:50,209 --> 00:33:52,545
I'm about to go, I'm about
to get my phone back,
798
00:33:52,628 --> 00:33:53,981
and I'mma see what other
weird shit he hide
799
00:33:54,005 --> 00:33:57,133
in this office that
he don't want me to see.
800
00:33:57,216 --> 00:33:59,427
Kevin, don't.
801
00:34:23,826 --> 00:34:25,161
- Claude.
- Ronny, baby!
802
00:34:25,244 --> 00:34:27,705
Garçon.
803
00:34:27,788 --> 00:34:30,833
- Have a seat.
- Ah.
804
00:34:30,916 --> 00:34:34,462
Uh, pull up
scene 12, please.
805
00:34:34,545 --> 00:34:36,088
Have a seat.
806
00:34:37,882 --> 00:34:40,551
- This is a bad idea.
- This is a good idea.
807
00:34:40,634 --> 00:34:42,845
Wilcox won't murder me
in front of you.
808
00:34:42,928 --> 00:34:44,805
Come on, there's his office.
Come on.
809
00:34:46,766 --> 00:34:48,976
Shit!
810
00:34:49,060 --> 00:34:51,020
Do you have a bobby pin?
811
00:34:51,103 --> 00:34:52,313
Yeah, yeah,
812
00:34:52,396 --> 00:34:54,207
it's in the bun on the back
of my fucking head.
813
00:34:54,231 --> 00:34:56,067
Okay, don't be an asshole.
814
00:34:56,150 --> 00:34:58,152
I'll find a paperclip.
Excuse me.
815
00:35:00,154 --> 00:35:01,739
Wait, you know how
to pick a lock?
816
00:35:01,822 --> 00:35:04,033
South side of Chicago,
born and raised.
817
00:35:04,116 --> 00:35:05,302
It's not North Philadelphia,
818
00:35:05,326 --> 00:35:07,453
but I'm not gonna
hold it against you.
819
00:35:07,536 --> 00:35:09,497
- Got it.
- Hey.
820
00:35:15,336 --> 00:35:19,048
Oh, God!
Oh, fuck, I can't see shit.
821
00:35:19,131 --> 00:35:20,925
Where you at?
822
00:35:21,008 --> 00:35:22,760
Help! Help me!
823
00:35:22,843 --> 00:35:24,929
- I've got you, little Kev.
- Oh, hell no!
824
00:35:25,012 --> 00:35:26,931
Help!
825
00:35:27,014 --> 00:35:29,058
It's fucking hot!
826
00:35:29,141 --> 00:35:32,103
Oh, whoa.
827
00:35:32,186 --> 00:35:35,314
You damn right.
It is authentic.
828
00:35:35,398 --> 00:35:36,750
He doesn't even know
he's being filmed.
829
00:35:36,774 --> 00:35:38,192
Exactly.
830
00:35:38,275 --> 00:35:41,612
I've been chasing for
this cinema verite style
831
00:35:41,695 --> 00:35:45,366
of realistic hard action
filmmaking for years.
832
00:35:45,449 --> 00:35:48,202
It is my white whale,
my unicorn.
833
00:35:48,285 --> 00:35:50,871
All I needed was an actor
who was fragile,
834
00:35:50,955 --> 00:35:54,291
vulnerable, afraid
of being forgotten.
835
00:35:56,794 --> 00:35:59,296
Afraid of being forgotten.
836
00:35:59,380 --> 00:36:02,800
Thank you, Kevin.
You're a gift.
837
00:36:02,883 --> 00:36:05,177
Thank you, thank you.
838
00:36:11,559 --> 00:36:13,894
Any questions, uh,
for tomorrow's scenes?
839
00:36:13,978 --> 00:36:16,021
Oh, no.
840
00:36:19,900 --> 00:36:21,735
I should get back
to the set.
841
00:36:21,819 --> 00:36:23,487
Bonsoir.
- Bonsoir.
842
00:36:23,571 --> 00:36:25,114
Merci.
843
00:36:28,492 --> 00:36:30,077
Again.
844
00:36:33,289 --> 00:36:36,167
Hey, can I...
can I ask you a question?
845
00:36:36,250 --> 00:36:38,586
- Yeah.
- So you...
846
00:36:38,669 --> 00:36:40,588
you remember earlier today
when we were shooting
847
00:36:40,671 --> 00:36:42,214
the scene on green screen,
848
00:36:42,298 --> 00:36:45,634
like-like right before
the wire snapped,
849
00:36:45,718 --> 00:36:47,136
you kind of seemed
like you was...
850
00:36:47,219 --> 00:36:49,305
like you were really
into it.
851
00:36:49,388 --> 00:36:51,390
It's called acting.
852
00:36:52,600 --> 00:36:54,768
You acted like you
wanted to kiss me.
853
00:36:54,852 --> 00:36:56,770
Yes.
854
00:36:56,854 --> 00:36:59,356
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
855
00:36:59,440 --> 00:37:00,941
Yeah.
856
00:37:09,200 --> 00:37:12,703
Come on, let's go.
857
00:37:12,786 --> 00:37:15,956
The fuck.
Stealing my shit.
858
00:37:16,040 --> 00:37:17,833
Hollywood bitch.
859
00:37:33,307 --> 00:37:34,767
You got anything?
860
00:37:34,850 --> 00:37:36,560
Nope, you?
861
00:37:36,644 --> 00:37:39,271
Got a drawer
full of old head shots.
862
00:37:40,564 --> 00:37:42,107
Oh.
863
00:37:42,191 --> 00:37:43,585
"Coach Ron, you are
the bright light
864
00:37:43,609 --> 00:37:45,402
"in the darkest parts
of my soul."
865
00:37:45,486 --> 00:37:47,738
What the fuck
does that mean?
866
00:37:47,821 --> 00:37:48,882
We should get
out of here soon.
867
00:37:48,906 --> 00:37:50,157
No, we shouldn't.
868
00:37:50,241 --> 00:37:51,343
I know there's
some stuff in here
869
00:37:51,367 --> 00:37:52,284
that he don't
want us to see.
870
00:37:52,368 --> 00:37:54,703
you just gotta
look for it.
871
00:37:54,787 --> 00:37:55,704
He probably got
one of them, like,
872
00:37:55,788 --> 00:37:58,457
secret compartments
somewhere.
873
00:37:58,541 --> 00:38:00,125
Got it!
874
00:38:00,209 --> 00:38:01,794
Oh, bingo.
875
00:38:01,877 --> 00:38:03,921
Holy shit.
876
00:38:07,925 --> 00:38:10,135
Here, I got another lock
for you to pick.
877
00:38:10,219 --> 00:38:11,571
- What do you think's in there?
- Don't know.
878
00:38:11,595 --> 00:38:13,347
Some shit he don't want
nobody to find.
879
00:38:15,015 --> 00:38:16,517
Shit!
880
00:38:26,735 --> 00:38:28,404
Get your ass.
881
00:38:52,845 --> 00:38:56,640
Oh, isn't
this interesting?
882
00:38:56,724 --> 00:39:00,352
Well, I know that you're both
pretending to be asleep,
883
00:39:00,436 --> 00:39:02,021
and that's fine.
884
00:39:02,104 --> 00:39:04,398
It's probably the best acting
that either of you
885
00:39:04,481 --> 00:39:06,567
will ever do
in your entire lives.
886
00:39:06,650 --> 00:39:09,361
Especially you, Agent Hart.
887
00:39:09,445 --> 00:39:12,197
But if I find out
that either of you
888
00:39:12,281 --> 00:39:14,825
left this bunk
without my permission,
889
00:39:14,908 --> 00:39:16,410
you'll regret the day
you ever stepped
890
00:39:16,493 --> 00:39:18,954
into Ron Wilcox
Action Star School.
891
00:39:28,380 --> 00:39:31,050
If you weren't fake sleeping,
you would have woken up.
892
00:39:53,739 --> 00:39:55,616
Holy shit,
that was too close.
893
00:39:55,699 --> 00:39:57,368
You're telling me.
894
00:40:17,596 --> 00:40:19,223
Kevin, come on,
open it later.
895
00:40:19,306 --> 00:40:20,825
We're supposed to be
at the sound stage.
896
00:40:20,849 --> 00:40:22,434
I'm almost there.
Wait a second.
897
00:40:26,313 --> 00:40:28,107
Shit.
898
00:40:28,190 --> 00:40:29,900
I got it!
I got it. I got it.
899
00:40:32,194 --> 00:40:33,779
It's a necklace.
900
00:40:33,862 --> 00:40:35,531
It's got RBG.
901
00:40:35,614 --> 00:40:38,742
Oh, "R" is for Rodrigo,
that guy that he murdered.
902
00:40:38,826 --> 00:40:40,536
Jesus, Kevin,
give it a rest.
903
00:40:40,619 --> 00:40:42,055
You gotta sneak that shit
back into his office
904
00:40:42,079 --> 00:40:43,706
before he figures out
you stole it.
905
00:40:43,789 --> 00:40:45,541
Rise and shine,
let's go.
906
00:40:45,624 --> 00:40:47,876
Come on, let's go!
- Shit.
907
00:40:47,960 --> 00:40:49,712
Put this on your side.
908
00:40:59,263 --> 00:41:00,973
All right, class.
909
00:41:01,056 --> 00:41:03,559
It's a fun day today.
It's a big day.
910
00:41:03,642 --> 00:41:06,520
Behind that door, I got
a very big surprise for you.
911
00:41:06,603 --> 00:41:08,123
We'd see daylight
for the first time?
912
00:41:08,147 --> 00:41:10,023
Nope.
Any other guesses?
913
00:41:10,107 --> 00:41:11,376
You gonna open the door up
and a panther
914
00:41:11,400 --> 00:41:12,669
gonna come through
and maul us to death?
915
00:41:12,693 --> 00:41:14,253
Getting warmer.
You're getting warmer.
916
00:41:14,319 --> 00:41:15,571
Why am I getting warmer?
917
00:41:15,654 --> 00:41:17,574
Ooh, a source of protein
other than beef jerky?
918
00:41:17,614 --> 00:41:19,074
That would be great.
- Watch this.
919
00:41:19,158 --> 00:41:21,078
- Unbelievable. Please.
- Some fruit? A smoothie?
920
00:41:22,703 --> 00:41:24,997
- Josh Hartnett!
- Hey, hey, hey, buddy!
921
00:41:25,080 --> 00:41:26,206
Ooh, ooh look out,
look out!
922
00:41:26,290 --> 00:41:27,666
Ooh.
923
00:41:27,750 --> 00:41:30,085
Get off me.
924
00:41:30,169 --> 00:41:32,004
My favorite alumni.
925
00:41:32,087 --> 00:41:34,882
Class third week, April 1999.
- Oh, come on, that's...
926
00:41:34,965 --> 00:41:36,967
- Come on!
- Oh my God.
927
00:41:37,050 --> 00:41:39,511
Is it possible that
you're too beautiful?
928
00:41:41,138 --> 00:41:43,015
Um, yeah. You kiss...
929
00:41:43,098 --> 00:41:45,642
it kissed my, um...
you smile a lot.
930
00:41:45,726 --> 00:41:47,186
What the fuck
did you just say?
931
00:41:47,269 --> 00:41:48,270
- I...
- Kev,
932
00:41:48,353 --> 00:41:49,414
I'm so glad
you're here, man.
933
00:41:49,438 --> 00:41:50,939
This is gonna change
your life.
934
00:41:51,023 --> 00:41:52,357
I mean, when Ron finished
with me,
935
00:41:52,441 --> 00:41:53,960
I shot "Pearl Harbor",
"Black Hawk Down",
936
00:41:53,984 --> 00:41:55,235
"Hollywood Homicide".
937
00:41:55,319 --> 00:41:56,921
You should have probably
left the last one out.
938
00:41:56,945 --> 00:41:58,214
When I first came here,
I was nothing.
939
00:41:58,238 --> 00:42:00,115
I was, like, 100 pounds
soaking wet.
940
00:42:00,199 --> 00:42:02,785
By the time I was out of here,
I felt invincible.
941
00:42:02,868 --> 00:42:05,537
I felt like Academy Award
winner Matt Damon or some shit.
942
00:42:05,621 --> 00:42:07,289
You're too much.
943
00:42:07,372 --> 00:42:08,499
He's too much.
944
00:42:08,582 --> 00:42:10,959
Why don't you guys catch up,
and, Agent King?
945
00:42:11,043 --> 00:42:12,878
- Yes?
- Let's talk motivation.
946
00:42:12,961 --> 00:42:15,297
- Bye.
- Nice to meet you.
947
00:42:17,090 --> 00:42:19,927
Kev, how's it
going so far, man?
948
00:42:20,010 --> 00:42:21,678
It is not going good.
949
00:42:21,762 --> 00:42:23,889
This place is like a prison.
Do you hear me?
950
00:42:23,972 --> 00:42:25,849
And I think Coach Ron
is trying to kill me.
951
00:42:25,933 --> 00:42:27,994
Well, that's just his way.
Look at him, he's a teddy bear.
952
00:42:28,018 --> 00:42:29,520
He ain't no teddy bear!
953
00:42:29,603 --> 00:42:31,355
He's the complete opposite
of a teddy bear.
954
00:42:31,438 --> 00:42:32,981
And I believe he
murdered somebody.
955
00:42:33,065 --> 00:42:35,150
I think he murdered
a Colombian drug lord.
956
00:42:35,234 --> 00:42:36,610
I think he did it.
957
00:42:36,693 --> 00:42:38,153
I got a guy named
Rodrigo was here,
958
00:42:38,237 --> 00:42:40,518
and I think he murdered...
- Oh God, you crack me up, Kev.
959
00:42:43,033 --> 00:42:45,118
Oh, you're serious?
- Yes, I'm serious.
960
00:42:45,202 --> 00:42:46,662
I went snooping around
in his office,
961
00:42:46,745 --> 00:42:48,747
and I think I found
a keepsake from the murder.
962
00:42:48,831 --> 00:42:50,582
It was a necklace,
it's got "RBG".
963
00:42:50,666 --> 00:42:52,793
Ron murdered someone
and kept a necklace?
964
00:42:52,876 --> 00:42:54,670
Like Dexter?
965
00:42:54,753 --> 00:42:56,255
- Josh, listen to me.
- Yes?
966
00:42:56,338 --> 00:42:58,173
- We need to call the cops.
- Okay.
967
00:42:58,257 --> 00:42:59,859
We need the people from
out there to come in here.
968
00:42:59,883 --> 00:43:00,944
- Okay.
- I'm taking about the Feds,
969
00:43:00,968 --> 00:43:03,053
the DA...
- What are you whispering about?
970
00:43:03,136 --> 00:43:04,531
Nothing.
We're talking about workouts.
971
00:43:04,555 --> 00:43:05,949
We're talking
my workout, his workout.
972
00:43:05,973 --> 00:43:07,349
It's nothing much.
973
00:43:07,432 --> 00:43:08,976
How's my goddaughter?
974
00:43:09,059 --> 00:43:10,894
Oh, man, she is
growing like a weed.
975
00:43:10,978 --> 00:43:12,145
Oh, yeah?
Let me see that.
976
00:43:12,229 --> 00:43:13,414
- Goddaughter?
- Let me see that.
977
00:43:13,438 --> 00:43:15,232
Whoa-ho! Oh!
- Look at her.
978
00:43:15,315 --> 00:43:16,668
She misses her
Uncle Ronnie, though.
979
00:43:16,692 --> 00:43:18,652
Well, you tell her
that her Uncle Ronnie
980
00:43:18,735 --> 00:43:20,153
misses that little
pumpkinhead, too.
981
00:43:20,237 --> 00:43:22,823
Hey.
982
00:43:22,906 --> 00:43:25,659
Hey, why the sad face?
Are you okay?
983
00:43:25,742 --> 00:43:26,952
I'm fine, I'm fine.
984
00:43:28,954 --> 00:43:31,248
I can't find
my special necklace.
985
00:43:31,331 --> 00:43:33,709
The one that I had
custom made with RBG.
986
00:43:33,792 --> 00:43:35,544
Ruth Bader Ginsburg.
987
00:43:35,627 --> 00:43:36,879
That's okay, it's okay.
988
00:43:36,962 --> 00:43:38,231
Yeah, she's my favorite
Supreme Court justice.
989
00:43:38,255 --> 00:43:40,966
I mean, I love
her dissenting opinions.
990
00:43:41,049 --> 00:43:42,801
Let me tell you something,
if I find out
991
00:43:42,885 --> 00:43:45,053
that someone stole it,
I'll kill 'em.
992
00:43:45,137 --> 00:43:46,763
I'll kill 'em!
- Hey!
993
00:43:46,847 --> 00:43:49,016
You have to think
positive thoughts.
994
00:43:49,099 --> 00:43:52,269
We're gonna find it.
It's gonna turn up soon.
995
00:43:52,352 --> 00:43:55,188
I promise you,
it's gonna turn up soon.
996
00:43:57,441 --> 00:44:00,027
Today we're doing
firearms stunts.
997
00:44:00,110 --> 00:44:02,362
We've got Officer Hartnett,
who is a corrupt cop
998
00:44:02,446 --> 00:44:03,864
who's gone rogue,
999
00:44:03,947 --> 00:44:06,700
we've got Agent King
and Agent Hart.
1000
00:44:06,783 --> 00:44:09,411
You finally found him
in this chop shop,
1001
00:44:09,494 --> 00:44:11,455
and this is where the shootout
will take place.
1002
00:44:11,538 --> 00:44:13,123
Now, here is your gun.
1003
00:44:13,206 --> 00:44:14,291
Nice.
1004
00:44:14,374 --> 00:44:16,710
Don't you ever accept
a gun like that.
1005
00:44:16,793 --> 00:44:17,920
It's always from the back.
1006
00:44:18,003 --> 00:44:19,296
You passed it
to me frontwards.
1007
00:44:19,379 --> 00:44:21,465
That was a test.
You failed.
1008
00:44:21,548 --> 00:44:24,676
Now, these firearms
are loaded, okay?
1009
00:44:24,760 --> 00:44:28,388
So please, be careful
how you handle them.
1010
00:44:28,472 --> 00:44:29,657
Well, we don't have
to be that careful
1011
00:44:29,681 --> 00:44:31,441
'cause there's-there's
blanks in them, right?
1012
00:44:31,516 --> 00:44:32,643
Not loaded, loaded.
Just...
1013
00:44:32,726 --> 00:44:34,561
They're blanks, correct?
1014
00:44:36,104 --> 00:44:38,607
No, Coach Ron, that's
not gonna do it for me.
1015
00:44:38,690 --> 00:44:41,568
I need a verbal confirmation
that it's blanks in this gun.
1016
00:44:41,652 --> 00:44:42,921
- What do you think?
- Yes or no?
1017
00:44:42,945 --> 00:44:44,196
Are there blanks
in this gun?
1018
00:44:44,279 --> 00:44:46,448
Come on, Kevin.
Get your head in the game, man.
1019
00:44:46,531 --> 00:44:48,343
Josh, my head's in the game.
I'm just trying to be safe.
1020
00:44:48,367 --> 00:44:51,078
And he still didn't
say yes or no.
1021
00:44:51,161 --> 00:44:52,621
Yes.
1022
00:44:52,704 --> 00:44:55,207
- Yes, you heard him.
- Okay, everyone in wardrobe.
1023
00:44:55,290 --> 00:44:56,684
I'll see you in ten,
right back here,
1024
00:44:56,708 --> 00:44:57,834
we start the shootout.
1025
00:44:57,918 --> 00:44:59,503
Let's go, let's go,
let's go.
1026
00:45:03,215 --> 00:45:05,217
Hey, what are you doing?
Get into costume.
1027
00:45:05,300 --> 00:45:06,760
No, not me.
I'm not doing it.
1028
00:45:06,843 --> 00:45:08,053
Kevin, you're
being paranoid.
1029
00:45:08,136 --> 00:45:09,656
We all heard him say
there were blanks.
1030
00:45:09,680 --> 00:45:12,140
My gun has blanks,
I guarantee you that.
1031
00:45:12,224 --> 00:45:15,060
But I bet you Josh, he's got
a fully loaded fuckin' pistol.
1032
00:45:15,143 --> 00:45:16,812
Now, Ron already tried
to kill me once.
1033
00:45:16,895 --> 00:45:19,082
Right now, he's probably willing
to go all the fuckin' way.
1034
00:45:19,106 --> 00:45:20,273
I'm not doing it.
1035
00:45:20,357 --> 00:45:22,043
Trying to make it look like
a goddamn accident.
1036
00:45:22,067 --> 00:45:23,443
That's exactly
what it'll do.
1037
00:45:23,527 --> 00:45:27,656
Kevin Hart accidentally killed
in Ron Wilcox's Action School.
1038
00:45:27,739 --> 00:45:29,533
No, thank you.
1039
00:45:29,616 --> 00:45:31,284
First of all,
Josh would never do that.
1040
00:45:31,368 --> 00:45:33,578
He is sweet and sensitive.
1041
00:45:33,662 --> 00:45:36,790
And he's tender, probably.
1042
00:45:36,873 --> 00:45:38,709
Okay, what the fuck
is over there, huh?
1043
00:45:38,792 --> 00:45:40,335
I bet he's none
of those things.
1044
00:45:40,419 --> 00:45:42,546
He and Ron,
they're like this.
1045
00:45:42,629 --> 00:45:45,257
Fucking godfather to his kids.
He didn't say shit about that.
1046
00:45:45,340 --> 00:45:46,620
And they know
I got the necklace!
1047
00:45:46,675 --> 00:45:47,718
So put it back.
1048
00:45:47,801 --> 00:45:49,281
I can't put it back
'cause too late.
1049
00:45:49,344 --> 00:45:50,804
They know I got
the goddamn necklace.
1050
00:45:50,887 --> 00:45:52,681
You know what? It's not
safe for me here.
1051
00:45:52,764 --> 00:45:54,141
I gotta go.
- Oh,
1052
00:45:54,224 --> 00:45:55,368
so you're just gonna give up
on your lifelong dream
1053
00:45:55,392 --> 00:45:57,728
because you're afraid
of getting shot?
1054
00:45:57,811 --> 00:46:00,022
Fuck that dream!
1055
00:46:00,105 --> 00:46:02,482
And look, I'm leavin'.
1056
00:46:02,566 --> 00:46:05,861
You got a choice.
1057
00:46:05,944 --> 00:46:08,071
Come with me.
1058
00:46:08,155 --> 00:46:09,740
Uh...
1059
00:46:12,784 --> 00:46:14,536
I can't.
1060
00:46:14,619 --> 00:46:16,538
I'm sorry.
1061
00:46:16,621 --> 00:46:18,457
This is my shot.
1062
00:46:18,540 --> 00:46:20,917
I understand.
1063
00:46:21,001 --> 00:46:22,836
It is your shot
and you deserve it.
1064
00:46:28,383 --> 00:46:30,719
Okay.
1065
00:46:30,802 --> 00:46:32,304
Nice.
1066
00:46:41,646 --> 00:46:42,646
One, two, three.
1067
00:46:45,525 --> 00:46:46,651
Yes!
1068
00:46:55,702 --> 00:46:58,080
Ugh. That dick.
1069
00:47:00,957 --> 00:47:04,544
The fuck is my car?
1070
00:47:06,505 --> 00:47:08,673
You gotta be kidding me.
1071
00:47:13,053 --> 00:47:16,098
Oh, motherfucker!
1072
00:47:32,405 --> 00:47:36,284
He killed my car.
He killed my fucking car.
1073
00:47:36,368 --> 00:47:38,370
Kevin!
1074
00:47:38,453 --> 00:47:40,789
Kevin!
1075
00:47:40,872 --> 00:47:43,208
Where are you?
1076
00:47:43,291 --> 00:47:46,419
Come out, come out
wherever you are!
1077
00:47:46,503 --> 00:47:48,130
Shit.
1078
00:48:11,361 --> 00:48:14,531
Goddamn it.
1079
00:48:14,614 --> 00:48:16,575
Motherfuckin' squirrels.
1080
00:48:16,658 --> 00:48:18,785
Shit! Get your ass
outta here.
1081
00:48:18,869 --> 00:48:19,995
Shoo!
1082
00:48:20,078 --> 00:48:22,122
Go squirrel!
1083
00:48:23,582 --> 00:48:25,333
Motherfucker.
1084
00:48:25,417 --> 00:48:27,127
Better get your ass back.
1085
00:48:27,210 --> 00:48:28,837
You hear me?
1086
00:48:28,920 --> 00:48:30,505
I ain't scared of you.
1087
00:48:30,589 --> 00:48:32,799
You better keep it over there
before you get hurt.
1088
00:48:32,883 --> 00:48:34,068
Bring it over here,
you get what you want.
1089
00:48:34,092 --> 00:48:35,927
Shit. Shit!
Oh...
1090
00:48:36,011 --> 00:48:37,220
I see you.
1091
00:48:37,304 --> 00:48:39,514
I ain't takin'
my eye off you.
1092
00:48:39,598 --> 00:48:41,933
I got ya locked in.
1093
00:48:42,017 --> 00:48:44,311
Stay back!
1094
00:48:45,937 --> 00:48:47,898
Stupid woods.
1095
00:48:53,236 --> 00:48:54,613
Oh.
1096
00:48:54,696 --> 00:48:56,156
Thank god.
1097
00:48:56,239 --> 00:48:57,657
Excuse me.
1098
00:48:57,741 --> 00:48:59,743
Excuse me, sir?
1099
00:48:59,826 --> 00:49:01,536
How ya doin', man?
1100
00:49:04,497 --> 00:49:07,250
- You know you're trespassin'.
- Yes.
1101
00:49:07,334 --> 00:49:08,960
I mean, no. No.
I didn't.
1102
00:49:09,044 --> 00:49:10,253
I do now. But I...
1103
00:49:10,337 --> 00:49:13,715
Sign posted
right over there.
1104
00:49:13,798 --> 00:49:16,176
Only got two words on it.
1105
00:49:16,259 --> 00:49:20,096
No and trespassin'.
1106
00:49:20,180 --> 00:49:21,848
Yep.
1107
00:49:21,932 --> 00:49:24,184
I see it now.
1108
00:49:24,267 --> 00:49:27,145
I see it now. I didn't see that
when I... when I came in.
1109
00:49:27,229 --> 00:49:29,439
The way I came in,
my back was to that.
1110
00:49:29,522 --> 00:49:30,440
So, I never caught that.
1111
00:49:30,523 --> 00:49:34,569
You're a city boy, ain't ya?
1112
00:49:34,653 --> 00:49:37,822
Well, uh, I refer to myself
as a city man,
1113
00:49:37,906 --> 00:49:40,325
not a boy.
You can say boy, man,
1114
00:49:40,408 --> 00:49:41,510
whatever you...
what do you prefer?
1115
00:49:41,534 --> 00:49:44,329
Woods ain't safe
for a city boy...
1116
00:49:46,790 --> 00:49:49,876
much less a city man.
1117
00:49:52,337 --> 00:49:53,672
Okay.
1118
00:49:53,755 --> 00:49:55,966
I'm gonna address the
elephant in the woods.
1119
00:49:56,049 --> 00:49:58,361
This whole "Deliverance" thing
that we got goin' on right now...
1120
00:49:58,385 --> 00:50:00,637
which is great, okay?
'Cause it's workin'.
1121
00:50:00,720 --> 00:50:01,948
So, when things are workin',
you give 'em the accolades
1122
00:50:01,972 --> 00:50:02,847
that they deserve.
1123
00:50:02,931 --> 00:50:05,308
I'm-I'm uncomfortable, sir.
1124
00:50:05,392 --> 00:50:07,352
I'm actually scared,
all right?
1125
00:50:07,435 --> 00:50:09,729
So, now that we know that,
let me help this mood
1126
00:50:09,813 --> 00:50:10,915
by just telling you
why I'm here.
1127
00:50:10,939 --> 00:50:12,941
I'm tryin' to use a phone.
You got a phone?
1128
00:50:13,024 --> 00:50:16,111
I wanna use it real quick,
and I'm outta here.
1129
00:50:19,948 --> 00:50:21,199
Two minutes.
1130
00:50:21,283 --> 00:50:22,659
No! I'm not out
of my mind.
1131
00:50:22,742 --> 00:50:24,911
As a matter of fact,
I'm very much in my mind.
1132
00:50:24,995 --> 00:50:27,181
- The dude's tryin' to kill me.
- That's unfortunate.
1133
00:50:27,205 --> 00:50:29,040
What do you mean?
Unfortunate?
1134
00:50:29,124 --> 00:50:31,793
Listen to me, Danny.
He's trying to kill me.
1135
00:50:31,876 --> 00:50:33,062
No, totally.
1136
00:50:33,086 --> 00:50:35,213
Kev, listen.
I've got huge news.
1137
00:50:35,297 --> 00:50:36,464
All right? Ready?
1138
00:50:36,548 --> 00:50:38,383
"Pound Pups 4."
1139
00:50:38,466 --> 00:50:43,013
"Pound Pups 4."
They want you to voice Reggie,
1140
00:50:43,096 --> 00:50:45,682
a quick-witted,
short-tempered goldendoodle
1141
00:50:45,765 --> 00:50:47,350
who craves mischief.
1142
00:50:47,434 --> 00:50:48,643
Did they ask
for me directly?
1143
00:50:48,727 --> 00:50:49,936
Yeah. Now, listen.
1144
00:50:50,020 --> 00:50:52,272
The money's not what
you're used to making,
1145
00:50:52,355 --> 00:50:54,190
but this could be the role
that gets you back
1146
00:50:54,274 --> 00:50:57,736
in the good graces
with the comedy gods.
1147
00:50:58,903 --> 00:51:01,948
Hey, I... Uh...
1148
00:51:02,032 --> 00:51:05,035
Hey! I... Hi.
1149
00:51:05,118 --> 00:51:07,245
Hey, I'm Reggie
the goldendoodle
1150
00:51:07,329 --> 00:51:09,372
and I'm ready to
create some mischief!
1151
00:51:09,456 --> 00:51:11,249
See? You're a genius!
1152
00:51:11,333 --> 00:51:13,209
It's amazing.
I'm in the movie right now.
1153
00:51:13,293 --> 00:51:14,461
I'm watchin' the movie!
1154
00:51:15,962 --> 00:51:19,049
Now, normally, we'd,
you know, counter.
1155
00:51:19,132 --> 00:51:21,134
Negotiate a better deal,
blah, blah, blah.
1156
00:51:21,217 --> 00:51:22,927
I think we should
close this one.
1157
00:51:23,011 --> 00:51:24,512
Huh? What do you think?
1158
00:51:24,596 --> 00:51:26,264
No, no, no.
Don't sigh.
1159
00:51:26,348 --> 00:51:28,058
Be happy.
This is good, Kev.
1160
00:51:34,731 --> 00:51:37,442
Oh, goddamn it.
Are you crying?
1161
00:51:37,525 --> 00:51:40,904
How did we get here,
Danny? Hmm?
1162
00:51:40,987 --> 00:51:42,864
How did we get here?
1163
00:51:42,947 --> 00:51:44,324
Just tell me
how we got here.
1164
00:51:44,407 --> 00:51:46,701
Look. Stop beatin'
yourself up.
1165
00:51:46,785 --> 00:51:49,079
Huh? You made a mistake.
1166
00:51:49,162 --> 00:51:50,514
You tried to be
somethin' you're not.
1167
00:51:50,538 --> 00:51:51,831
You're not an action hero.
1168
00:51:51,915 --> 00:51:54,000
You know that now.
1169
00:51:54,084 --> 00:51:55,436
So, is that a yes
on "Pound Pups 4?"
1170
00:51:55,460 --> 00:51:56,753
I...
1171
00:51:56,836 --> 00:51:59,130
Help! Help me!
1172
00:51:59,214 --> 00:52:01,341
- I'm stuck!
- Kevin?
1173
00:52:01,424 --> 00:52:04,177
Kevin, I need
a verbal yes on this.
1174
00:52:04,260 --> 00:52:06,596
Kevin, don't let
this go away, buddy.
1175
00:52:06,679 --> 00:52:08,765
- Help me!
- Kev, goldendoodles.
1176
00:52:08,848 --> 00:52:10,225
You love dogs, Kevin.
1177
00:52:10,308 --> 00:52:11,434
Help!
1178
00:52:11,518 --> 00:52:13,520
- Kevin.
- Help me!
1179
00:52:13,603 --> 00:52:15,271
Help!
1180
00:52:15,355 --> 00:52:16,940
- Hey, you okay?
- No!
1181
00:52:17,023 --> 00:52:19,734
- Fuck.
- Damn truck broke.
1182
00:52:19,818 --> 00:52:22,112
Ugh. Shit!
1183
00:52:22,195 --> 00:52:23,905
It's on my chest.
1184
00:52:23,988 --> 00:52:25,615
I can't breathe.
1185
00:52:25,698 --> 00:52:27,298
I'm gonna call
somebody right now, man.
1186
00:52:27,325 --> 00:52:30,203
Okay? I'm gonna
call someone.
1187
00:52:30,286 --> 00:52:31,788
Hey.
1188
00:52:31,871 --> 00:52:33,206
Hey!
1189
00:52:33,289 --> 00:52:36,918
Oh, sh...
1190
00:52:37,001 --> 00:52:38,670
Okay. Come on.
1191
00:52:38,753 --> 00:52:40,463
You gotta lift this truck.
1192
00:52:40,547 --> 00:52:43,049
You gotta lift this truck!
1193
00:52:43,133 --> 00:52:44,884
Lift the fuckin' truck.
1194
00:52:44,968 --> 00:52:46,845
Come on, Kevin.
1195
00:52:46,928 --> 00:52:47,804
Ready.
1196
00:52:47,887 --> 00:52:50,348
Three, two, one.
1197
00:52:53,059 --> 00:52:57,147
I'm doing it!
I'm doin' it!
1198
00:53:03,987 --> 00:53:06,114
Oh.
1199
00:53:06,197 --> 00:53:07,282
You okay?
1200
00:53:07,365 --> 00:53:09,576
Breathe, man.
1201
00:53:09,659 --> 00:53:11,119
Slow down.
1202
00:53:11,202 --> 00:53:13,663
Take your time.
All right.
1203
00:53:13,746 --> 00:53:15,099
Nice and slow.
Get your breath back.
1204
00:53:15,123 --> 00:53:17,167
Oh, my god.
You just saved my life.
1205
00:53:17,250 --> 00:53:19,878
- No.
- Oh, oh, yeah.
1206
00:53:19,961 --> 00:53:21,880
You're like
a real-life Rambo.
1207
00:53:27,051 --> 00:53:28,678
I guess I kinda am.
1208
00:53:28,761 --> 00:53:29,761
Oh...
1209
00:53:32,223 --> 00:53:34,893
How can I ever
repay you, sir?
1210
00:53:34,976 --> 00:53:37,687
Sir? No, man.
1211
00:53:37,770 --> 00:53:39,481
Wait, you don't
know who I am?
1212
00:53:39,564 --> 00:53:42,317
You don't recognize me from
movies, TV, stand-up comedy?
1213
00:53:42,400 --> 00:53:44,694
Uh, no?
1214
00:53:48,865 --> 00:53:51,493
The name is Hart.
1215
00:53:51,576 --> 00:53:53,286
Agent Hart.
1216
00:53:58,166 --> 00:53:59,435
Hey, you wouldn't happen
to know of a shortcut back
1217
00:53:59,459 --> 00:54:01,711
to Ron Wilcox's Action School,
would you?
1218
00:54:01,794 --> 00:54:02,921
- Wilcox Property.
- Yeah.
1219
00:54:03,004 --> 00:54:04,589
Uh, yes, Agent.
1220
00:54:04,672 --> 00:54:07,967
Uh, you can follow that path,
it'll take you right to it.
1221
00:54:08,051 --> 00:54:09,427
Okay.
1222
00:54:09,511 --> 00:54:10,613
I think I'mma go
and get on that trail
1223
00:54:10,637 --> 00:54:12,055
before the sun goes down.
1224
00:54:12,138 --> 00:54:15,058
Uh, that...
you ain't walkin'.
1225
00:54:22,732 --> 00:54:24,192
Oh, yeah.
1226
00:54:34,953 --> 00:54:36,555
- How was that?
- Phenomenal.
1227
00:54:36,579 --> 00:54:37,997
We got it.
1228
00:54:38,081 --> 00:54:40,458
All right, that's a wrap
on the creepy trailer!
1229
00:54:40,542 --> 00:54:42,043
Well done, everyone.
1230
00:55:00,395 --> 00:55:02,981
Stop!
Goddamn it, stop!
1231
00:55:03,064 --> 00:55:04,566
Motherfuckers.
1232
00:55:08,027 --> 00:55:11,030
Chitty chitty
bang bang, bitch.
1233
00:55:11,114 --> 00:55:13,533
No!
1234
00:55:13,616 --> 00:55:15,785
No!
1235
00:55:15,868 --> 00:55:18,538
Fuck!
1236
00:55:20,290 --> 00:55:23,251
Holy shit, Jordan.
You weren't joking.
1237
00:55:23,334 --> 00:55:24,853
He actually thinks we're using
real bullets today.
1238
00:55:24,877 --> 00:55:26,921
Kev.
1239
00:55:27,005 --> 00:55:28,965
- You told him?
- I'm sorry, it was funny.
1240
00:55:29,048 --> 00:55:30,550
It's not fucking funny!
1241
00:55:30,633 --> 00:55:32,635
'Cause that man back there
is a lunatic.
1242
00:55:32,719 --> 00:55:34,721
You're a fucking lunatic,
Coach Ron.
1243
00:55:34,804 --> 00:55:37,140
Hey! You know what?
1244
00:55:37,223 --> 00:55:39,309
Maybe I am a lunatic.
1245
00:55:39,392 --> 00:55:41,477
Maybe I oughta
just kill ya!
1246
00:55:41,561 --> 00:55:43,688
Hey, no, Ron.
Hold up.
1247
00:55:43,771 --> 00:55:45,106
Let me kill him.
1248
00:55:45,189 --> 00:55:47,066
- Stop it.
- No. Me! Me! Me!
1249
00:55:48,109 --> 00:55:50,153
Stop it. Stop!
1250
00:55:50,236 --> 00:55:51,446
You know what, assholes?
1251
00:55:51,529 --> 00:55:53,215
Y'all wanna fuckin' play,
then play. Go ahead.
1252
00:55:53,239 --> 00:55:54,239
Unload 'em all.
1253
00:55:54,282 --> 00:55:55,783
All right.
Now we're havin' fun.
1254
00:55:55,867 --> 00:55:58,786
After you.
1255
00:56:02,832 --> 00:56:05,251
Shit!
1256
00:56:05,335 --> 00:56:06,919
Holy shit.
1257
00:56:07,003 --> 00:56:09,172
Maybe there was
a bullet in there.
1258
00:56:09,255 --> 00:56:11,716
You're bad, man!
1259
00:56:11,799 --> 00:56:13,217
Motherfucker!
1260
00:56:13,301 --> 00:56:14,677
- No, no, no, no, no.
- Oh, my god.
1261
00:56:14,761 --> 00:56:16,888
Josh, stop, man.
This is bullshit!
1262
00:56:16,971 --> 00:56:18,264
You're tryin' to
fuckin' kill me!
1263
00:56:18,348 --> 00:56:21,267
What's your problem?
I already apologized to you.
1264
00:56:21,351 --> 00:56:23,519
- When? When did you apologize?
- I thought I did.
1265
00:56:23,603 --> 00:56:25,688
What, you thought
you apologized?
1266
00:56:25,772 --> 00:56:28,441
You know what, maybe I would
apologize to you
1267
00:56:28,524 --> 00:56:30,276
if you gave me back
my necklace.
1268
00:56:30,360 --> 00:56:33,279
There it is. There it is.
1269
00:56:33,363 --> 00:56:35,132
You know I took the necklace
so you tried to fucking kill me.
1270
00:56:35,156 --> 00:56:36,449
- Hey, hey.
- Just admit it, man!
1271
00:56:36,532 --> 00:56:37,760
Kev, Kev, Kev, Kev.
Just chill out.
1272
00:56:37,784 --> 00:56:38,701
We're all just
goofin' around.
1273
00:56:38,785 --> 00:56:39,702
We're just having
a little fun, okay?
1274
00:56:39,786 --> 00:56:41,204
Nobody got hurt.
Nobody got hurt!
1275
00:56:41,287 --> 00:56:43,039
- Oh, it was a goof.
- Yeah, just a goof.
1276
00:56:43,122 --> 00:56:44,683
Well, now that I know that,
I guess I feel better.
1277
00:56:44,707 --> 00:56:45,833
All right.
1278
00:56:45,917 --> 00:56:47,061
Did you know it was
a goof, Jordan?
1279
00:56:47,085 --> 00:56:48,753
You know what,
I don't know. Okay?
1280
00:56:48,836 --> 00:56:50,147
It was... I don't...
I don't know.
1281
00:56:50,171 --> 00:56:51,523
- You don't know.
- I'm staying out of it.
1282
00:56:51,547 --> 00:56:52,566
- Now, you're staying out of it.
- Yeah.
1283
00:56:52,590 --> 00:56:53,508
You know what? Okay.
Everybody's tempers
1284
00:56:53,591 --> 00:56:54,300
are a little hot
right now.
1285
00:56:54,384 --> 00:56:55,611
Maybe we could all
just take a break.
1286
00:56:55,635 --> 00:56:56,779
Maybe take five.
- Let's take a break.
1287
00:56:56,803 --> 00:56:57,821
We drink some water.
We have some beef jerky.
1288
00:56:57,845 --> 00:56:59,045
- All right. Okay.
- We just...
1289
00:56:59,097 --> 00:57:00,616
We reconvene in a bit, okay?
- I'm cool. I'm cool.
1290
00:57:00,640 --> 00:57:02,117
- You're cool?
- I'm cool. Give... Come on.
1291
00:57:02,141 --> 00:57:02,975
- Give him a hug.
- Give me a hug, man.
1292
00:57:03,059 --> 00:57:04,477
Give me a hug.
- I don't... No.
1293
00:57:04,560 --> 00:57:06,813
- Come on. I love you, man.
- That's beautiful, right?
1294
00:57:06,896 --> 00:57:08,648
How do you love me? How?
1295
00:57:08,731 --> 00:57:10,608
How? How does
anybody love anybody?
1296
00:57:11,818 --> 00:57:14,153
- What?
- That's profound.
1297
00:57:14,237 --> 00:57:16,739
It's a good question.
1298
00:57:16,823 --> 00:57:18,241
We're gonna
miss you, big guy.
1299
00:57:18,324 --> 00:57:20,052
- I'll miss you too, baby.
- That was a hoot!
1300
00:57:20,076 --> 00:57:24,247
Now he's lettin' us see
daytime as if we're free.
1301
00:57:24,330 --> 00:57:26,874
I never said you
weren't allowed to leave.
1302
00:57:26,958 --> 00:57:29,252
You got a little bit
of imagination there, buddy.
1303
00:57:29,335 --> 00:57:31,045
Well, I remember
my car used to be here
1304
00:57:31,129 --> 00:57:34,132
and now my car is
at the bottom of a ravine.
1305
00:57:34,215 --> 00:57:35,633
Guess I'm imaginin'
that, too?
1306
00:57:35,717 --> 00:57:37,885
Yeah, well, you know,
this is meth country.
1307
00:57:37,969 --> 00:57:41,389
Probably a couple of tweakers
goin' for a joyride.
1308
00:57:41,472 --> 00:57:42,515
They'll be back.
- Ah...
1309
00:57:42,598 --> 00:57:44,350
Tweakers love to drive,
I keep forgettin.
1310
00:57:44,434 --> 00:57:45,309
I thought we were
gonna be cool, baby.
1311
00:57:45,393 --> 00:57:46,811
- Yeah.
- I am cool. Cool.
1312
00:57:48,104 --> 00:57:49,397
Hey, look.
1313
00:57:49,480 --> 00:57:51,149
I know this has
been tough on you.
1314
00:57:51,232 --> 00:57:53,234
You only got
a couple days left.
1315
00:57:53,317 --> 00:57:56,279
My advice, take as much wisdom
as you can from this guy.
1316
00:57:56,362 --> 00:57:57,923
And just have some fun.
- Yeah. Thank you.
1317
00:57:57,947 --> 00:58:00,241
Appreciate you, Josh.
1318
00:58:00,324 --> 00:58:02,201
See ya, Kev.
1319
00:58:02,285 --> 00:58:04,871
- I love you, man.
- I love you too, man.
1320
00:58:04,954 --> 00:58:06,289
Jordan.
1321
00:58:09,459 --> 00:58:10,585
The fuck was that?
1322
00:58:19,552 --> 00:58:22,221
Agent Hart.
I wanna tell ya somethin'.
1323
00:58:22,305 --> 00:58:24,116
I don't really feel like
dealin' with it, Coach Ron.
1324
00:58:24,140 --> 00:58:26,184
But look.
1325
00:58:26,267 --> 00:58:28,603
I'm sorry about
that live bullet, man.
1326
00:58:28,686 --> 00:58:30,313
I really am.
1327
00:58:30,396 --> 00:58:32,940
It's all I wanted, man.
1328
00:58:33,024 --> 00:58:34,609
All I wanted
was an apology.
1329
00:58:34,692 --> 00:58:36,611
I know.
1330
00:58:36,694 --> 00:58:40,156
You sayin' that to me makes
the world of difference.
1331
00:58:40,239 --> 00:58:42,825
I'm sorry that
I accused you of...
1332
00:58:42,909 --> 00:58:46,078
of tryin' to kill me
and other people.
1333
00:58:46,162 --> 00:58:48,664
Now, give me a hug, man.
Thank you.
1334
00:58:48,748 --> 00:58:50,666
Thank you.
- Uh, guys?
1335
00:58:50,750 --> 00:58:53,002
- Yeah.
- Who is that?
1336
00:59:08,476 --> 00:59:10,478
- Holy shit.
- Oh shit!
1337
00:59:14,190 --> 00:59:17,360
Oh, shit!
1338
00:59:17,443 --> 00:59:18,712
- Get inside!
- What the fuck was that?
1339
00:59:18,736 --> 00:59:20,655
- Come on!
- Fuck this shit!
1340
00:59:20,738 --> 00:59:22,698
- Goddamn it!
- Oh, shit!
1341
00:59:24,200 --> 00:59:27,745
It's a bomb!
1342
00:59:30,790 --> 00:59:32,875
What the hell is happening?
1343
00:59:32,959 --> 00:59:34,669
Hey, Ron, I-I don't
know this scene.
1344
00:59:34,752 --> 00:59:35,670
Where is it
in the script?
1345
00:59:35,753 --> 00:59:37,964
It is not in
the fucking script!
1346
00:59:38,047 --> 00:59:39,399
No, no, no.
Tell me you're kidding.
1347
00:59:39,423 --> 00:59:40,967
Tell me that
was just a stunt.
1348
00:59:41,050 --> 00:59:42,653
That we did not just watch
Josh Hartnett explode!
1349
00:59:42,677 --> 00:59:45,847
It is not a stunt!
It is not in the script!
1350
00:59:45,930 --> 00:59:48,099
Josh Hartnett is dead!
1351
00:59:48,182 --> 00:59:51,686
Oh, god, I've fucked up.
I've fucked up!
1352
00:59:51,769 --> 00:59:53,062
What the fuck is goin' on?
1353
00:59:53,145 --> 00:59:54,772
- I can't.
- What the fuck is goin' on?
1354
00:59:54,856 --> 00:59:55,874
O-okay, Kevin.
1355
00:59:55,898 --> 00:59:57,525
Don't-Don't be mad.
Don't be mad.
1356
00:59:57,608 --> 00:59:59,610
But this whole thing,
1357
00:59:59,694 --> 01:00:01,534
aside from what just
happened to Josh Hartnett,
1358
01:00:01,571 --> 01:00:03,155
has-has been scripted.
1359
01:00:03,239 --> 01:00:04,258
What the fuck
is that accent?
1360
01:00:04,282 --> 01:00:05,658
I was acting,
I'm sorry!
1361
01:00:05,741 --> 01:00:07,869
I'm not from Chicago,
I'm from Essex!
1362
01:00:07,952 --> 01:00:10,454
Claude Van De Velde wanted you
at your most authentic,
1363
01:00:10,538 --> 01:00:13,082
so he hid a bunch
of cameras in here
1364
01:00:13,165 --> 01:00:15,167
to film us playing roles,
doing the stunts,
1365
01:00:15,251 --> 01:00:16,502
all of it.
1366
01:00:16,586 --> 01:00:18,105
But whatever just happened
wasn't part of it.
1367
01:00:18,129 --> 01:00:20,339
Which is fucking insane, Ron!
For fuck's sake!
1368
01:00:20,423 --> 01:00:21,799
For fuck's sake?
1369
01:00:21,883 --> 01:00:23,068
That's what you
wanna say to me?
1370
01:00:23,092 --> 01:00:24,677
For fuck's sake?
1371
01:00:33,352 --> 01:00:35,688
- Talk in your regular voice.
- All right.
1372
01:00:35,771 --> 01:00:38,190
No, I've lost it now.
I'm in my head!
1373
01:00:38,274 --> 01:00:40,943
Who does that?
Who does this to somebody?
1374
01:00:52,997 --> 01:00:55,333
Oh, shit. You okay?
1375
01:00:55,416 --> 01:00:59,170
Oh, god.
I'm such a fucking idiot!
1376
01:00:59,253 --> 01:01:02,048
What was I thinking?
- What the hell was that, man?
1377
01:01:02,131 --> 01:01:03,525
You want to know
what the hell is going on?
1378
01:01:03,549 --> 01:01:04,651
You're goddamn right
I wanna know what's going on.
1379
01:01:04,675 --> 01:01:06,135
I bought some drugs.
1380
01:01:06,218 --> 01:01:08,930
I sold them to the wrong people.
- What?
1381
01:01:09,013 --> 01:01:11,641
And Rodrigo got mad at me
and we got into a fight.
1382
01:01:11,724 --> 01:01:13,851
And then, I accidentally
killed him.
1383
01:01:13,935 --> 01:01:15,478
- You did kill Rodrigo.
- Yes.
1384
01:01:15,561 --> 01:01:16,914
I told you
he fuckin' killed him.
1385
01:01:16,938 --> 01:01:19,315
And that necklace.
That necklace was his necklace.
1386
01:01:19,398 --> 01:01:21,233
I'm a horrible person.
1387
01:01:21,317 --> 01:01:23,402
I'm going straight
to hell.
1388
01:01:23,486 --> 01:01:25,206
You're goddamn right
you're going to hell.
1389
01:01:25,279 --> 01:01:26,614
What are you doing?
- Claude!
1390
01:01:26,697 --> 01:01:28,574
- What are you doin', Ron?
- Claude!
1391
01:01:28,658 --> 01:01:31,619
Claude, if you're watchin',
you call the cops right now.
1392
01:01:31,702 --> 01:01:33,454
You call the fuckin cops.
1393
01:01:33,537 --> 01:01:35,915
Senor Wilcox!
1394
01:01:35,998 --> 01:01:37,583
Oh, shit.
1395
01:01:37,667 --> 01:01:39,335
My nephew Rodrigo's body
washed up
1396
01:01:39,418 --> 01:01:41,837
4 miles due south
of here!
1397
01:01:41,921 --> 01:01:44,674
A coincidence, no?
1398
01:01:44,757 --> 01:01:46,717
I'm gonna give you
2 minutes.
1399
01:01:46,801 --> 01:01:49,762
Exactly dos minutos
to bring your ass out here
1400
01:01:49,845 --> 01:01:51,138
and face me like a man!
1401
01:01:51,222 --> 01:01:53,724
If not, I'm gonna set fire
to the building
1402
01:01:53,808 --> 01:01:55,226
and burn you
like a chicharone.
1403
01:01:57,979 --> 01:02:00,856
- Snap out of it!
- I can't! It's over!
1404
01:02:00,940 --> 01:02:02,525
Listen to me,
motherfucker.
1405
01:02:02,608 --> 01:02:05,194
This is why men shouldn't be
left in charge of anything!
1406
01:02:05,277 --> 01:02:07,947
My career is just now
becoming the thing
1407
01:02:08,030 --> 01:02:10,992
that I have worked
my entire life towards!
1408
01:02:11,075 --> 01:02:13,452
And I'm not dying because
of you, you fucking idiot.
1409
01:02:13,536 --> 01:02:15,621
We're all gonna die!
1410
01:02:18,374 --> 01:02:20,584
- Oh, shit.
- What the fuck, man?
1411
01:02:20,668 --> 01:02:22,670
Everybody gotta
calm the fuck down!
1412
01:02:22,753 --> 01:02:24,880
They're all blanks.
1413
01:02:24,964 --> 01:02:26,882
- Hey. Hey. Hey.
- Don't hit me.
1414
01:02:26,966 --> 01:02:29,093
I'm not gonna hit you.
Look.
1415
01:02:29,176 --> 01:02:32,013
When I first walked through
that door, you told me.
1416
01:02:32,096 --> 01:02:33,305
You said, "Kevin..."
1417
01:02:33,389 --> 01:02:35,516
You said an action hero
is not in here.
1418
01:02:35,599 --> 01:02:38,019
You said it's not in here.
- Uh-huh.
1419
01:02:38,102 --> 01:02:39,729
You said that it's here.
1420
01:02:39,812 --> 01:02:41,605
It's in your heart, man.
1421
01:02:41,689 --> 01:02:44,150
You know, clearly,
you done made some mistakes.
1422
01:02:44,233 --> 01:02:46,068
And one of those mistakes
involved murderin'
1423
01:02:46,152 --> 01:02:47,820
the nephew of some kind
of drug lord.
1424
01:02:47,903 --> 01:02:49,697
Oh, god.
1425
01:02:49,780 --> 01:02:51,365
I killed him!
1426
01:02:51,449 --> 01:02:53,534
I'm not tryin' to
fuckin' upset you, man.
1427
01:02:53,617 --> 01:02:55,745
Listen.
I know that you know.
1428
01:02:55,828 --> 01:02:59,040
I know that you know that
there's an action hero in there.
1429
01:02:59,123 --> 01:03:02,168
And I know that a true
action hero is-is-is tough.
1430
01:03:02,251 --> 01:03:03,419
Is confident.
1431
01:03:03,502 --> 01:03:05,713
And they're unfazed
by the minor details
1432
01:03:05,796 --> 01:03:07,965
that disrupt
your average lay person.
1433
01:03:08,049 --> 01:03:11,385
They will take responsibility
for their shit.
1434
01:03:11,469 --> 01:03:13,763
You go out there
and you tell the truth, man.
1435
01:03:13,846 --> 01:03:15,806
Tell the fucking truth.
1436
01:03:15,890 --> 01:03:18,517
Say Rodrigo's death...
say it was an accident.
1437
01:03:18,601 --> 01:03:20,770
Say it was a fucking accident.
And give 'em...
1438
01:03:20,853 --> 01:03:22,730
Give 'em this.
Here.
1439
01:03:22,813 --> 01:03:23,981
You give 'em this,
1440
01:03:24,065 --> 01:03:25,691
say you wanna make
things right.
1441
01:03:25,775 --> 01:03:26,877
- I wanna make it right.
- That's all you gotta do!
1442
01:03:26,901 --> 01:03:28,486
Say I wanna make it right.
I'm sorry.
1443
01:03:28,569 --> 01:03:29,987
I fucked up.
- I fucked up.
1444
01:03:30,071 --> 01:03:32,071
- I wanna tell the truth.
- I wanna tell the truth.
1445
01:03:32,114 --> 01:03:33,908
- That's it!
- I don't wanna make a mistake.
1446
01:03:33,991 --> 01:03:35,034
Okay, listen.
1447
01:03:35,117 --> 01:03:37,661
All you gotta do
is be the action hero
1448
01:03:37,745 --> 01:03:41,207
that you wanna see
in the world.
1449
01:03:41,290 --> 01:03:43,501
Thank you.
1450
01:03:43,584 --> 01:03:45,419
Thank you.
1451
01:03:45,503 --> 01:03:47,004
Tell the truth, man.
1452
01:03:52,718 --> 01:03:54,136
That was amazing.
1453
01:03:59,809 --> 01:04:01,143
Amigos!
1454
01:04:01,227 --> 01:04:02,269
Amigos.
1455
01:04:02,353 --> 01:04:03,771
Peace. Peace.
1456
01:04:03,854 --> 01:04:05,272
Paz.
1457
01:04:05,356 --> 01:04:06,607
Paz. Paz.
1458
01:04:06,690 --> 01:04:07,608
Paz. Paz. Paz. Uh...
1459
01:04:07,691 --> 01:04:10,236
Shit, it's
actually working.
1460
01:04:10,319 --> 01:04:12,655
Kevin, did you just
save our lives?
1461
01:04:12,738 --> 01:04:14,990
No. I just know
that being the hero
1462
01:04:15,074 --> 01:04:17,535
means ownin' up
to your mistakes.
1463
01:04:17,618 --> 01:04:20,579
I had to learn
the same thing in my life.
1464
01:04:20,663 --> 01:04:23,541
Just glad that Ron can
learn the same thing too.
1465
01:04:27,878 --> 01:04:29,630
Shit!
1466
01:04:29,713 --> 01:04:31,132
What the fuck!
1467
01:04:48,023 --> 01:04:49,567
Is he dead?
1468
01:04:49,650 --> 01:04:51,694
I mean, he took a lot
of bullets. I think so.
1469
01:04:51,777 --> 01:04:52,987
We gotta check.
1470
01:04:53,070 --> 01:04:54,710
We gotta check to see
if he's still alive.
1471
01:04:58,075 --> 01:04:58,909
He's dead.
- Yeah.
1472
01:04:58,993 --> 01:04:59,869
- He's dead.
- Yeah.
1473
01:04:59,952 --> 01:05:02,621
- He's fuckin' dead.
- Okay. Okay.
1474
01:05:02,705 --> 01:05:05,249
Maybe if we just stay quiet,
they'll leave.
1475
01:05:05,332 --> 01:05:07,293
I like that plan.
Yeah. Yeah.
1476
01:05:07,376 --> 01:05:08,502
Juan. Ortiz.
Go inside.
1477
01:05:08,586 --> 01:05:10,045
If there's any witnesses,
kill them.
1478
01:05:10,129 --> 01:05:11,297
Hide!
1479
01:05:11,380 --> 01:05:12,423
Go!
1480
01:05:12,506 --> 01:05:13,841
Fuck.
1481
01:05:13,924 --> 01:05:15,259
Close it, close it,
close it.
1482
01:05:15,342 --> 01:05:16,343
Hold it. Hold it.
1483
01:05:22,474 --> 01:05:24,226
Hey, do we got any more
real bullets?
1484
01:05:24,310 --> 01:05:25,686
I checked already,
1485
01:05:25,769 --> 01:05:26,937
they're blanks.
1486
01:05:27,021 --> 01:05:28,039
What do you mean
they're fucking blanks?
1487
01:05:28,063 --> 01:05:30,065
Is everything in here
a fuckin' prop?
1488
01:05:30,149 --> 01:05:31,358
What about the knife?
1489
01:05:31,442 --> 01:05:32,562
The knife
I stabbed you with?
1490
01:05:32,610 --> 01:05:34,403
It was retractable.
Fake blood.
1491
01:05:34,486 --> 01:05:37,990
Shit! Are you
fucking kidding me?
1492
01:05:38,073 --> 01:05:39,825
Shit! Go.
Go, go, go!
1493
01:05:52,838 --> 01:05:54,048
Kevin?
1494
01:05:54,131 --> 01:05:55,549
Yeah.
1495
01:05:55,633 --> 01:05:57,384
Um, if anything happens
1496
01:05:57,468 --> 01:05:59,303
and we don't
get out of here alive,
1497
01:05:59,386 --> 01:06:02,681
I just want you to know...
- Stop.
1498
01:06:02,765 --> 01:06:05,476
I love you too.
1499
01:06:05,559 --> 01:06:08,062
- Uh...
- Shit. You were gonna
1500
01:06:08,145 --> 01:06:10,231
say somethin' else,
weren't you?
1501
01:06:10,314 --> 01:06:11,625
You were gonna say it
was nice knowin' me?
1502
01:06:11,649 --> 01:06:13,234
- Yeah.
- Fuck me.
1503
01:06:13,317 --> 01:06:15,694
We're about to die.
You could've at least lied.
1504
01:06:15,778 --> 01:06:17,380
I mean, you've been lying
this entire week,
1505
01:06:17,404 --> 01:06:18,715
wouldn't have made
that big of a difference.
1506
01:06:18,739 --> 01:06:21,575
I'm sorry.
I was hired to play a role
1507
01:06:21,659 --> 01:06:23,244
and they paid me
a lot of money.
1508
01:06:23,327 --> 01:06:24,870
Like, a lot.
1509
01:06:24,954 --> 01:06:26,097
You're not making it
any better.
1510
01:06:26,121 --> 01:06:27,748
You're actually making it
a lot worse.
1511
01:06:27,831 --> 01:06:29,708
Shh.
Did you hear that?
1512
01:06:29,792 --> 01:06:31,168
Shit.
They're coming.
1513
01:06:31,252 --> 01:06:32,711
Play dead.
- What? No.
1514
01:06:32,795 --> 01:06:34,147
They'll walk in here,
they'll see that we're dead,
1515
01:06:34,171 --> 01:06:35,047
and then they'll leave.
1516
01:06:35,130 --> 01:06:36,340
But how-how did we die?
1517
01:06:36,423 --> 01:06:38,050
I can't hear you.
I'm dying.
1518
01:06:57,361 --> 01:06:59,446
What the...
1519
01:07:09,331 --> 01:07:11,542
Oy! Did you hear that?
1520
01:07:11,625 --> 01:07:13,127
Yeah.
I think it's Ortiz.
1521
01:07:13,210 --> 01:07:16,422
Oh. Then what the fuck
are you waiting for?
1522
01:07:18,132 --> 01:07:19,883
It's not fuckin'
rocket science.
1523
01:07:32,730 --> 01:07:34,523
Kick me, bitch? Huh?
Kick this!
1524
01:07:38,152 --> 01:07:40,738
Kick me twice,
shame on me.
1525
01:07:45,326 --> 01:07:47,411
Kick me three times...
1526
01:08:04,678 --> 01:08:07,264
Don't look,
I'm on your fuckin' back.
1527
01:08:07,348 --> 01:08:09,183
Come on, let's get
the fuck outta here.
1528
01:08:16,815 --> 01:08:18,525
Wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait.
1529
01:08:20,527 --> 01:08:21,527
Come on.
1530
01:08:29,036 --> 01:08:29,953
You think you can
win a gunfight
1531
01:08:30,037 --> 01:08:31,205
with a Colombian
drug lord?
1532
01:08:31,288 --> 01:08:33,457
No. We don't have guns
in England.
1533
01:08:33,540 --> 01:08:34,851
Didn't you say you're
from North Philly?
1534
01:08:34,875 --> 01:08:37,002
What are you doing?
I can't take the gun like that.
1535
01:08:37,086 --> 01:08:39,213
Give it to me right.
1536
01:08:39,296 --> 01:08:40,714
Ron would be proud.
1537
01:08:40,798 --> 01:08:42,549
Shut up, Ron would be proud.
1538
01:08:42,633 --> 01:08:44,343
Ron would be proud.
1539
01:08:44,426 --> 01:08:45,969
Shit!
1540
01:08:46,053 --> 01:08:48,806
Go. Go, go, go.
1541
01:08:48,889 --> 01:08:51,100
Fuck, fuck, go.
1542
01:09:02,236 --> 01:09:04,822
Okay. I'm going
to create a distraction,
1543
01:09:04,905 --> 01:09:06,657
and then you're going
to shoot the guy.
1544
01:09:06,740 --> 01:09:07,658
- Yeah.
- Are you ready?
1545
01:09:07,741 --> 01:09:09,660
I've never been
more ready in my life.
1546
01:09:09,743 --> 01:09:12,371
On three.
One, two...
1547
01:09:12,454 --> 01:09:13,973
Wait, wait, wait.
No, don't count like that.
1548
01:09:13,997 --> 01:09:17,126
Go the other way. Three, two...
Like that does better for me.
1549
01:09:17,209 --> 01:09:20,796
Three, two, one.
1550
01:09:20,879 --> 01:09:22,506
Go, go, go.
1551
01:09:22,589 --> 01:09:23,589
It's go-time.
1552
01:09:25,259 --> 01:09:27,386
Yeah, motherfucker!
1553
01:09:27,469 --> 01:09:29,054
Yeah, motherfucker!
1554
01:09:30,848 --> 01:09:32,266
God damn!
1555
01:09:32,349 --> 01:09:33,642
Motherfucking prop!
1556
01:09:33,725 --> 01:09:35,185
I'm out! I'm out!
I'm out!
1557
01:09:37,438 --> 01:09:39,731
Fuck!
Almost got him.
1558
01:09:39,815 --> 01:09:41,567
- Yeah, you did.
- Yeah.
1559
01:09:44,528 --> 01:09:46,113
Okay, he's reloading.
1560
01:09:46,196 --> 01:09:47,281
Follow me. Quick.
- Okay.
1561
01:09:47,364 --> 01:09:49,658
Wait, wait. Wait for me!
Wait for me!
1562
01:09:53,120 --> 01:09:54,037
Damn it.
1563
01:09:54,121 --> 01:09:55,873
Can't believe
I missed his ass.
1564
01:09:55,956 --> 01:09:58,375
I had him. The sight.
It's gotta be the sight.
1565
01:09:58,459 --> 01:09:59,686
The sight is off with this.
- No, Kevin.
1566
01:09:59,710 --> 01:10:01,753
You just can't shoot for shit.
We need to think!
1567
01:10:01,837 --> 01:10:04,631
There has to be something
in here we can use.
1568
01:10:04,715 --> 01:10:07,468
Guess what we can't use? This.
It's out of bullets.
1569
01:10:07,551 --> 01:10:08,886
I ain't got
no more bullets.
1570
01:10:08,969 --> 01:10:10,471
Kevin! Focus.
1571
01:10:10,554 --> 01:10:11,763
It's props.
1572
01:10:11,847 --> 01:10:13,891
It's a bunch of fuckin'
props over here.
1573
01:10:20,772 --> 01:10:22,816
Whoop, there it is.
1574
01:11:05,943 --> 01:11:08,779
Hell no!
Oh, hell no!
1575
01:11:08,862 --> 01:11:11,949
Oh hell no! No-no-no...
1576
01:11:12,032 --> 01:11:13,492
Got you,
motherfucker!
1577
01:11:15,577 --> 01:11:16,577
Oh shit!
1578
01:11:18,372 --> 01:11:20,457
Okay, okay,
okay, okay.
1579
01:11:23,085 --> 01:11:24,085
Hold his ass.
1580
01:11:28,590 --> 01:11:31,802
Oh, you thought it
was over, didn't you?
1581
01:11:31,885 --> 01:11:33,554
But I don't
travel alone.
1582
01:11:33,637 --> 01:11:36,014
No, I got my friends
with me.
1583
01:11:36,098 --> 01:11:39,810
Let me introduce you to
Mr. Fuck Shit and Mr. Up.
1584
01:11:39,893 --> 01:11:42,312
- Kevin, shut up!
- Okay. No, no, I was...
1585
01:11:42,396 --> 01:11:43,522
I had more,
but I can cut it.
1586
01:11:43,605 --> 01:11:44,815
Hold this motherfucker.
1587
01:11:46,733 --> 01:11:49,611
Shit! I thought
you had his feet!
1588
01:11:52,990 --> 01:11:56,243
Shit! Yeah.
We got his ass.
1589
01:11:56,326 --> 01:11:57,786
I got him.
1590
01:11:57,869 --> 01:12:00,289
Ain't no "I" in "team."
Put it up here.
1591
01:12:00,372 --> 01:12:01,832
Let's get outta here.
Come on.
1592
01:12:01,915 --> 01:12:04,835
Watch your step.
Watch your step. Let's go.
1593
01:12:04,918 --> 01:12:06,396
He kicked me right in
the fucking nose,
1594
01:12:06,420 --> 01:12:07,588
son of a bitch.
1595
01:12:13,385 --> 01:12:15,304
Run! Run.
1596
01:12:24,271 --> 01:12:26,273
Hey, wait a minute,
Jordan.
1597
01:12:26,356 --> 01:12:27,816
Jordan, slow down.
It's a cliff.
1598
01:12:27,899 --> 01:12:29,276
It's a cliff!
It's a cliff!
1599
01:12:34,406 --> 01:12:35,406
Oh, shit.
1600
01:12:37,242 --> 01:12:38,660
Come on, we've got to go.
1601
01:12:38,744 --> 01:12:41,663
I can't! I can't do that.
That's too far.
1602
01:12:41,747 --> 01:12:44,416
I'm sorry.
- Jesus Christ, just jump.
1603
01:12:44,499 --> 01:12:46,918
- Just go. Go save yourself!
- No!
1604
01:12:47,002 --> 01:12:49,630
We're both getting out of here.
Now, hurry the fuck up!
1605
01:12:52,507 --> 01:12:56,803
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck!
1606
01:12:56,887 --> 01:12:57,887
Fuck!
1607
01:13:01,308 --> 01:13:02,768
Go. Go. Go.
1608
01:13:02,851 --> 01:13:03,851
Shit.
1609
01:13:08,565 --> 01:13:10,692
Why didn't you say
you love me back?
1610
01:13:10,776 --> 01:13:14,488
Uh, I dunno.
We just...
1611
01:13:14,571 --> 01:13:16,466
We're just kinda getting
to know each other and...
1612
01:13:25,499 --> 01:13:29,044
Any last words
before I blow your brains out?
1613
01:13:29,127 --> 01:13:31,463
Don't shoot me, okay?
1614
01:13:31,546 --> 01:13:33,924
You ain't gotta
do this.
1615
01:13:34,007 --> 01:13:35,342
You ain't gotta
do this, man.
1616
01:13:41,431 --> 01:13:43,225
Yeah. Just let me...
1617
01:13:45,894 --> 01:13:48,522
Why are you doing that?
1618
01:13:48,605 --> 01:13:51,692
Cut it out.
Stop it!
1619
01:13:51,775 --> 01:13:53,777
You look at me
when I kill you.
1620
01:13:53,860 --> 01:13:54,903
Look at me!
1621
01:13:54,986 --> 01:13:56,863
I know that there's
nothing up there.
1622
01:14:29,938 --> 01:14:32,190
Ah, shit!
1623
01:14:37,070 --> 01:14:40,115
Go home. I'm sure there's
a real hero somewhere
1624
01:14:40,198 --> 01:14:41,533
in need of
a goofy sidekick.
1625
01:14:43,160 --> 01:14:45,412
Well, you're not
alone anymore.
1626
01:14:51,209 --> 01:14:53,754
I've got you,
I promise!
1627
01:14:53,837 --> 01:14:55,422
Kevin!
1628
01:14:55,505 --> 01:14:57,299
Focus.
1629
01:15:11,354 --> 01:15:13,398
I owe you one.
1630
01:15:20,906 --> 01:15:23,116
I'm comin' for you.
1631
01:15:23,200 --> 01:15:24,409
I'm comin'.
1632
01:15:28,705 --> 01:15:31,124
It's a simple jump.
1633
01:15:31,208 --> 01:15:34,169
Three, two, one.
1634
01:15:44,221 --> 01:15:47,098
Hey.
Hey, come on.
1635
01:15:47,182 --> 01:15:49,267
Jordan, no.
Come on, get up. Get up.
1636
01:15:49,351 --> 01:15:51,228
Jordan, no.
1637
01:15:51,311 --> 01:15:53,605
Look at me.
Look at me.
1638
01:15:53,688 --> 01:15:57,442
Don't you die. Don't you die.
I'm not gonna let you die.
1639
01:15:57,526 --> 01:16:02,572
Come on, Jordan. You can't...
you can't die, not...
1640
01:16:02,656 --> 01:16:06,076
Come on, Jordan.
Get up. Don't do...
1641
01:16:06,159 --> 01:16:09,120
Jordan! Jordan!
1642
01:16:09,204 --> 01:16:11,748
I jumped.
I got over here.
1643
01:16:11,832 --> 01:16:15,126
Jordan?
I fucking jumped!
1644
01:16:15,210 --> 01:16:18,755
I fucking jumped.
1645
01:16:22,384 --> 01:16:23,635
I fuckin'...
1646
01:16:23,718 --> 01:16:27,722
Breathe.
1647
01:16:27,806 --> 01:16:29,891
Bravo.
1648
01:16:29,975 --> 01:16:32,352
It's a wrap, everybody.
1649
01:16:32,435 --> 01:16:34,646
Bravo.
1650
01:16:39,651 --> 01:16:41,027
A wrap?
1651
01:16:41,111 --> 01:16:42,362
Agent Hart!
1652
01:16:42,445 --> 01:16:43,446
Coach Ron?
1653
01:16:43,530 --> 01:16:46,741
Woo! Yeah!
1654
01:16:46,825 --> 01:16:48,702
- Yeah!
- Oh, yeah.
1655
01:16:48,785 --> 01:16:50,036
What the fuck
is happening?
1656
01:16:52,372 --> 01:16:54,374
Hey, baby. It was good workin'
with you.
1657
01:16:54,457 --> 01:16:56,084
No hard feelings, man.
Sorry.
1658
01:17:03,842 --> 01:17:06,803
- Hi.
- Oh, no. Come on, Jordan.
1659
01:17:06,887 --> 01:17:09,264
This was a part of it, too?
- Yeah.
1660
01:17:09,347 --> 01:17:11,808
Sorry, Kevin.
- Jordan.
1661
01:17:11,892 --> 01:17:14,019
I really thought
that I lost you.
1662
01:17:14,102 --> 01:17:16,855
Oh, Kevin.
1663
01:17:16,938 --> 01:17:19,024
Well, I guess I'm glad
that you're alive.
1664
01:17:19,107 --> 01:17:21,359
Well, movie magic.
1665
01:17:24,321 --> 01:17:26,656
- Movie magic.
- Very good. Very good, guys.
1666
01:17:30,535 --> 01:17:33,288
Jordan, no.
Come on. Get up. Get up.
1667
01:17:33,371 --> 01:17:35,874
Jordan, you can't do this.
Don't die.
1668
01:17:35,957 --> 01:17:38,543
Come on, Jordan.
Get up. Don't do...
1669
01:17:38,627 --> 01:17:42,672
Jordan!
Jordan!
1670
01:17:42,756 --> 01:17:46,051
I did it. I jumped.
I got over here!
1671
01:17:46,134 --> 01:17:49,971
Jordan.
I fuckin' jumped!
1672
01:17:50,055 --> 01:17:53,433
I fuckin' jumped.
1673
01:18:09,574 --> 01:18:12,243
Well?
1674
01:18:18,291 --> 01:18:20,877
That may be the strangest
movie I've ever seen.
1675
01:18:23,922 --> 01:18:28,343
So bizarre
and-and-and violent.
1676
01:18:31,554 --> 01:18:36,142
And yet...
authentic.
1677
01:18:39,354 --> 01:18:41,564
You can't teach
acting like that.
1678
01:18:41,648 --> 01:18:42,899
- So, you liked it?
- Like it?
1679
01:18:42,983 --> 01:18:44,651
I like kidney-shaped
swimming pools.
1680
01:18:44,734 --> 01:18:46,444
I like reduced-fat
eggnog.
1681
01:18:46,528 --> 01:18:48,530
This movie?
1682
01:18:48,613 --> 01:18:50,490
I loved.
1683
01:18:50,573 --> 01:18:52,409
He loves it.
1684
01:18:52,492 --> 01:18:54,494
How does it feel
to be a leading man
1685
01:18:54,577 --> 01:18:56,121
in your own
action movie?
1686
01:18:56,204 --> 01:18:59,165
- Wow.
- Kevin, please.
1687
01:18:59,249 --> 01:19:00,959
Oh, the same stage.
1688
01:19:01,042 --> 01:19:02,419
Uh...
1689
01:19:02,502 --> 01:19:04,838
Oh, stop, stop.
Guys.
1690
01:19:04,921 --> 01:19:07,424
Well, I learned
two things.
1691
01:19:07,507 --> 01:19:09,843
The first thing is
that it's dangerous.
1692
01:19:09,926 --> 01:19:11,553
It's dangerous
as hell.
1693
01:19:11,636 --> 01:19:13,722
I mean, I was set on fire.
1694
01:19:13,805 --> 01:19:15,074
I was hit in the head
with a bat.
1695
01:19:15,098 --> 01:19:17,142
Punched. Kicked.
I'm really gonna be scarred.
1696
01:19:17,225 --> 01:19:19,185
Yeah, he probably is.
1697
01:19:19,269 --> 01:19:20,329
No, I'm serious. I don't know
why you're laughing,
1698
01:19:20,353 --> 01:19:21,855
I'm being very serious.
1699
01:19:21,938 --> 01:19:24,000
I'm gonna have real issues
because of this guy right here.
1700
01:19:24,024 --> 01:19:25,316
- Fuck yeah!
- It's not...
1701
01:19:25,400 --> 01:19:28,653
It's not a fuck yeah.
It's a serious thing.
1702
01:19:30,989 --> 01:19:34,784
The second thing that
I learned is that, uh,
1703
01:19:34,868 --> 01:19:39,748
there's no such thing
as a leading man.
1704
01:19:39,831 --> 01:19:42,250
'Cause you're nothing
without your co-stars.
1705
01:19:45,545 --> 01:19:48,089
And I had that
in-in you guys.
1706
01:19:48,173 --> 01:19:49,966
So, thank you. Come on.
Get up here.
1707
01:19:50,050 --> 01:19:51,342
Seriously. Get up here.
- Bro.
1708
01:19:51,426 --> 01:19:52,761
- Buddy.
- Take this in.
1709
01:19:52,844 --> 01:19:54,387
Take it in with me.
1710
01:19:54,471 --> 01:19:56,514
Wait, wait.
Do I get top billing?
1711
01:19:56,598 --> 01:19:57,849
Yeah. You'll have
top billing.
1712
01:19:57,932 --> 01:19:59,184
Nice.
I forgot to ask.
1713
01:19:59,267 --> 01:20:00,745
Well, I think it's time
to celebrate.
1714
01:20:00,769 --> 01:20:01,811
- Yes!
- Yes!
1715
01:20:01,895 --> 01:20:03,730
Looks like we've got
a hit on our hands!
1716
01:20:03,813 --> 01:20:05,857
Ron, congratulations!
1717
01:20:05,940 --> 01:20:09,944
Congratulations, everybody.
1718
01:20:10,028 --> 01:20:12,864
Ladies and gentlemen, we have
a real treat for you today.
1719
01:20:12,947 --> 01:20:14,759
Okay, wait, wait, wait.
Easy with the spoilers.
1720
01:20:14,783 --> 01:20:16,785
This requires a little
dramatic build-up.
1721
01:20:16,868 --> 01:20:18,328
Okay.
Here it is.
1722
01:20:18,411 --> 01:20:19,805
Now, you know that
I'm not a big fan
1723
01:20:19,829 --> 01:20:22,707
of these high-budget
action films.
1724
01:20:22,791 --> 01:20:23,792
Here she goes again
1725
01:20:23,875 --> 01:20:26,086
with her love
of fancy foreign films.
1726
01:20:26,169 --> 01:20:27,897
I have discerning taste.
This is my build-up.
1727
01:20:27,921 --> 01:20:29,672
This is what you requested.
- Continue.
1728
01:20:29,756 --> 01:20:32,300
This movie
by Claude Van De Velde moved me.
1729
01:20:32,383 --> 01:20:34,260
I gotta say.
- It's an incredible film.
1730
01:20:34,344 --> 01:20:36,137
I've seen it 27 times.
1731
01:20:36,221 --> 01:20:37,680
Team Van de Velde right here.
1732
01:20:37,764 --> 01:20:40,475
The hero of this movie
is not the action star
1733
01:20:40,558 --> 01:20:41,684
that you would expect.
1734
01:20:41,768 --> 01:20:44,521
The one that really
saves the day.
1735
01:20:44,604 --> 01:20:46,314
Well, we have him here today.
1736
01:20:46,397 --> 01:20:49,317
Ladies and gentlemen,
Sassy the squirrel.
1737
01:20:51,069 --> 01:20:53,446
Oh, you're a lot bigger
in person.
1738
01:20:53,530 --> 01:20:55,448
Oh, hell no.
124386
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