Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,375 --> 00:00:01,666
This movie is a pamphlet.
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00:00:01,750 --> 00:00:04,416
We do not condone vices
such as drug or alcohol use.
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00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000
Downloaded from
YTS.MX
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00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000
Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX
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00:00:25,958 --> 00:00:30,416
A 100% FICTIONAL STORY
INSPIRED BY 100 TRUE STORIES
6
00:01:20,333 --> 00:01:23,875
Yes, Mom, we broke up!
We just weren't compatible.
7
00:01:23,958 --> 00:01:28,000
She wanted kids, and I…
Just that, she wanted kids.
8
00:01:28,750 --> 00:01:32,000
Mom, to own my own house,
I need to buy it first.
9
00:01:32,083 --> 00:01:34,625
And a child holds you back in your career.
10
00:01:35,375 --> 00:01:38,333
Exactly! That's what I said.
11
00:01:38,416 --> 00:01:42,541
When I'm project manager,
I'll give you grandkids.
12
00:01:42,625 --> 00:01:44,375
Bro, do you have one Leu?
13
00:01:44,458 --> 00:01:46,333
-What's that?
-Some money.
14
00:01:46,416 --> 00:01:48,333
-Do you have Revolut?
-What's that?
15
00:01:48,416 --> 00:01:51,541
How do you expect me to help you
if you don't help yourself?
16
00:01:54,041 --> 00:01:56,625
Welcome to FU Global!
17
00:01:57,875 --> 00:01:58,958
I got it.
18
00:02:01,083 --> 00:02:06,375
I have to hang up, I'm late for work.
Yes, I went to the doctor.
19
00:02:08,041 --> 00:02:09,791
No, I'm fine.
20
00:02:10,583 --> 00:02:11,958
It's nothing serious.
21
00:02:12,041 --> 00:02:15,583
The doctor said
I might be suffering from anxiety.
22
00:02:16,500 --> 00:02:18,083
No!
23
00:02:18,166 --> 00:02:20,291
-Gina, how are the kids?
-They got measles.
24
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Good! Wonderful!
25
00:02:22,291 --> 00:02:25,333
It's the excuse of the century,
not a disease. I'm fine.
26
00:02:25,416 --> 00:02:29,458
-How's the bossman?
-Don't jinx it till it's certain!
27
00:02:31,541 --> 00:02:34,458
Don't know when I'll visit. Kisses!
28
00:02:36,916 --> 00:02:39,958
Mom, I have seven people
who depend on me, I need to…
29
00:02:42,250 --> 00:02:43,791
Morning!
30
00:02:43,875 --> 00:02:47,791
-Where is everyone?
-Half smoking, half drinking coffee.
31
00:02:50,541 --> 00:02:53,208
What about the Black Friday
summer campaign?
32
00:02:53,291 --> 00:02:56,041
-Two!
-Waiting on you.
33
00:02:58,500 --> 00:03:01,291
-Spira Bank offer?
-Waiting on you.
34
00:03:04,708 --> 00:03:08,708
-And you? What do you think we should do?
-Whatever you think.
35
00:03:12,333 --> 00:03:14,500
Diana, what the fudge are you doing?
36
00:03:14,583 --> 00:03:18,333
-Looking for espadrilles. Are you blind?
-Can't you do that after six?
37
00:03:18,416 --> 00:03:22,333
-After six is my free time.
-You think it's okay to do this at work?
38
00:03:23,041 --> 00:03:26,333
This isn't work, it's just a job.
I'm not a laborer.
39
00:03:33,666 --> 00:03:36,125
Let me take this garbage out.
40
00:03:38,416 --> 00:03:42,750
-You took it out already. It's empty.
-Empty or not, I have to change it.
41
00:03:42,833 --> 00:03:46,375
-You want people to say I'm not working?
-Put the bag back.
42
00:03:46,458 --> 00:03:48,166
I took it out already.
43
00:03:48,250 --> 00:03:51,875
-It's still a bag!
-It's garbage now.
44
00:03:53,458 --> 00:03:56,083
Do you want Ms. Nico
to give me a bad report?
45
00:03:56,166 --> 00:03:59,541
No one will pick on you.
You're the only one working here.
46
00:03:59,625 --> 00:04:02,875
And with a broken arm.
You're afraid of Nicoleta now?
47
00:04:03,833 --> 00:04:05,958
-Morning.
-Morning.
48
00:04:06,041 --> 00:04:09,875
The team building is in three weeks
and we're not fully booked.
49
00:04:09,958 --> 00:04:13,500
Because for the past three years,
the Cluj division keeps beating us?
50
00:04:13,583 --> 00:04:17,541
That's why Mr. Oprea
wants us to win this year.
51
00:04:17,625 --> 00:04:21,333
'Happiness Cup'. Sounds great.
I'll email you about it.
52
00:04:22,666 --> 00:04:24,833
You already said that last week.
53
00:04:24,916 --> 00:04:31,375
Kind reminder, last week I sent an email
with AI solutions to reduce expenses.
54
00:04:32,083 --> 00:04:33,750
And I told you I'll email you.
55
00:04:35,166 --> 00:04:38,333
Kind reminder, today we're getting
the evaluation reports.
56
00:04:38,416 --> 00:04:40,958
-Good luck!
-Thanks!
57
00:04:41,041 --> 00:04:42,708
-Wait up! Nico!
-Yes!
58
00:04:42,791 --> 00:04:44,375
-Do you hate me?
-No!
59
00:04:44,458 --> 00:04:47,208
-Honestly now!
-Of course not!
60
00:04:48,625 --> 00:04:50,833
When did you get here?
61
00:04:52,833 --> 00:04:58,875
-Do you think they're doing it?
-Mr. Emil, how can you say that?
62
00:04:58,958 --> 00:05:02,791
Mr. Oprea only screws
the girls in accounting.
63
00:05:04,583 --> 00:05:09,083
-And Nicoleta?
-Nicoleta is HR. She screws all of us.
64
00:05:10,125 --> 00:05:16,000
Mr. Emil, you know what your problem is?
You work too much.
65
00:05:16,083 --> 00:05:16,916
THE COOLEST BOSS
66
00:05:17,583 --> 00:05:21,291
You're a smart guy. But your problem is
that you work too much.
67
00:05:23,583 --> 00:05:25,083
And that's a problem?
68
00:05:25,166 --> 00:05:27,541
I just told you it's a problem.
Are you stupid?
69
00:05:27,625 --> 00:05:28,875
Nico!
70
00:05:28,958 --> 00:05:30,291
-Is he stupid?
-Yes, boss!
71
00:05:30,375 --> 00:05:32,125
I just told him he's smart.
72
00:05:32,208 --> 00:05:33,916
-Are you stupid?
-Yes, boss!
73
00:05:36,583 --> 00:05:37,875
'He doesn't get teamwork.
74
00:05:37,958 --> 00:05:40,916
Puts too much pressure.
Sends emails at 8:00 PM.'
75
00:05:41,000 --> 00:05:44,333
We should work harder.
It's Black Friday, the summer edition.
76
00:05:44,416 --> 00:05:46,375
Do you even know what we do there?
77
00:05:47,291 --> 00:05:50,791
- Processing credit cards.
- And what do we actually do?
78
00:05:51,375 --> 00:05:52,208
Nico!
79
00:05:52,291 --> 00:05:55,041
At PLM Global, we add value
through operational excellence
80
00:05:55,125 --> 00:05:57,750
and understanding the partners'
business processes.
81
00:06:04,166 --> 00:06:08,583
We help people get installments.
Installments calm people down.
82
00:06:08,666 --> 00:06:11,583
They don't complain.
They don't feel wronged anymore.
83
00:06:11,666 --> 00:06:13,000
That sounds pretty bad.
84
00:06:13,083 --> 00:06:15,166
-I like it.
-She likes it.
85
00:06:15,250 --> 00:06:16,916
See how happy she looks?
86
00:06:17,000 --> 00:06:18,583
You look upset.
87
00:06:18,666 --> 00:06:20,416
-Do you have kids?
-No.
88
00:06:20,500 --> 00:06:21,791
-Installments?
-I rent.
89
00:06:21,875 --> 00:06:25,416
-See? You're stupid. What's our slogan?
-Making dreams come true…
90
00:06:28,541 --> 00:06:30,541
Making dreams come true in installments.
91
00:06:30,625 --> 00:06:32,208
-Nico!
-Yes.
92
00:06:32,291 --> 00:06:33,708
-Do you have kids?
-Yes!
93
00:06:33,791 --> 00:06:35,875
-Installments?
-Where do I even begin?
94
00:06:35,958 --> 00:06:39,541
-Are you upset?
-No! Unless you want me to be.
95
00:06:39,625 --> 00:06:43,500
See? Life is simple when you have
kids and installments.
96
00:06:43,583 --> 00:06:45,041
You're happy to have a job.
97
00:06:45,125 --> 00:06:48,708
When you have no kids
or installments, you hate life.
98
00:06:51,541 --> 00:06:54,375
And we in this company don't hate life.
99
00:06:56,458 --> 00:07:01,291
All together. We are all a big family.
100
00:07:04,333 --> 00:07:05,583
Please, God.
101
00:07:06,500 --> 00:07:10,541
Make it drop, God! God, make it…
102
00:07:12,791 --> 00:07:14,250
-Hi!
-Hi!
103
00:07:14,333 --> 00:07:16,708
-May I join you?
-Sure.
104
00:07:19,708 --> 00:07:21,375
Mercury is retrograding.
105
00:07:25,583 --> 00:07:26,791
-Great day!
-You too!
106
00:07:29,375 --> 00:07:32,416
I suggest you don't take it
as a step back.
107
00:07:32,500 --> 00:07:35,458
It's more of a horizontal promotion.
108
00:07:35,541 --> 00:07:39,500
-Nico, give us a minute.
-Yes, boss!
109
00:07:39,583 --> 00:07:41,875
If you want to lead, I have a department.
110
00:07:41,958 --> 00:07:44,791
They've gone an entire year
without a boss or results.
111
00:07:44,875 --> 00:07:50,791
-What department?
-A special one.
112
00:08:02,333 --> 00:08:04,750
ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION
113
00:08:51,541 --> 00:08:53,041
Uh-huh.
114
00:08:56,958 --> 00:08:58,625
Yeah!
115
00:08:58,708 --> 00:09:02,458
They didn't demote me. They promoted me.
116
00:09:03,666 --> 00:09:06,708
Horizontally. Yes, Mom.
117
00:09:06,791 --> 00:09:10,708
Mom, I'm going to lead a lot of people.
118
00:09:10,791 --> 00:09:11,875
Bye, Mom.
119
00:09:13,625 --> 00:09:18,666
Hi. Hello! Hi! Soft 'hey'.
120
00:09:21,375 --> 00:09:26,000
Hi guys, I'm your new team… leader.
121
00:09:27,166 --> 00:09:30,666
-Where's everyone?
-Half smoking, half drinking coffee.
122
00:09:33,958 --> 00:09:35,291
Is this…?
123
00:09:36,750 --> 00:09:38,083
It is.
124
00:09:44,458 --> 00:09:50,583
Let's start with introductions.
I'm Emil. I'm your new team leader.
125
00:09:50,666 --> 00:09:52,958
-What did you do?
-Excuse me?
126
00:09:53,041 --> 00:09:55,666
You did something to get demoted.
127
00:09:55,750 --> 00:09:59,375
They didn't demote me.
They promoted me. Horiz…
128
00:10:03,041 --> 00:10:07,500
I want to prove
that the call center department is useful.
129
00:10:07,583 --> 00:10:09,958
And show you that work can be fun.
130
00:10:13,500 --> 00:10:14,458
Why?
131
00:10:15,166 --> 00:10:19,041
What do you mean 'why'?
You should love your job.
132
00:10:19,125 --> 00:10:22,833
That's a hobby. If work was fun,
I would pay to be here.
133
00:10:23,458 --> 00:10:26,375
Nope. I love watching Asia Express.
134
00:10:26,458 --> 00:10:29,416
That means I clock in
lots of overtime hours.
135
00:10:29,500 --> 00:10:34,791
Onel, stop talking.
You're depriving your brain of oxygen.
136
00:10:34,875 --> 00:10:41,625
Guys, let's do a call simulation.
I'm the customer who has a problem.
137
00:10:47,541 --> 00:10:50,250
Hello, you have called FU Global.
I'm an idiot.
138
00:10:50,333 --> 00:10:53,333
-How may I help you?
-What are you doing?
139
00:10:53,416 --> 00:10:58,458
That's the procedure. They call,
I answer. They swear, I transfer them.
140
00:10:58,541 --> 00:11:01,416
How hard can it be to talk to a customer?
141
00:11:03,416 --> 00:11:04,541
Give it here!
142
00:11:07,083 --> 00:11:10,666
Suck my dick.
143
00:11:10,750 --> 00:11:13,250
Look, take the call from Buzău.
144
00:11:18,750 --> 00:11:21,833
Hello, you have called FU Global.
My name… What?
145
00:11:21,916 --> 00:11:26,208
-Do you have my name on the card?
-I know the name is on the card…
146
00:11:26,833 --> 00:11:32,000
What do you mean how I got your number?
I'm not being rude. Do what?
147
00:11:34,083 --> 00:11:36,583
I can't put anything in that hole.
It's too small.
148
00:11:36,666 --> 00:11:40,000
-You've ruined my life.
-Got it. I'll transfer you.
149
00:11:42,958 --> 00:11:44,375
FU Global, good afternoon.
150
00:11:44,458 --> 00:11:46,541
-Your mother is a whore!
-Yup! True.
151
00:11:46,625 --> 00:11:48,583
Of course! We all deserve to die.
152
00:11:48,666 --> 00:11:52,375
Let's see how we can solve that.
Can I get your social security number?
153
00:11:53,625 --> 00:11:55,541
How may I help you?
154
00:11:55,625 --> 00:11:57,875
Read a book. I don't know.
155
00:12:05,333 --> 00:12:11,500
Ma'am, I'm not saying 5G doesn't exist.
I'm saying it's not in pigeons.
156
00:12:12,541 --> 00:12:16,833
You have called the police. Hello! Hello!
157
00:12:18,833 --> 00:12:21,500
-What are you doing?
-Working.
158
00:12:22,333 --> 00:12:24,583
You just hung up on a client.
159
00:12:24,666 --> 00:12:29,125
-No. He hung up on me.
-Because you said you're the police.
160
00:12:29,208 --> 00:12:31,500
Our goal is to solve people's problems.
161
00:12:31,583 --> 00:12:36,416
No, that's the company's goal.
My goal is to get as many calls as I can.
162
00:12:36,500 --> 00:12:39,166
Don't you understand that I'm not human?
I'm a robot.
163
00:12:39,250 --> 00:12:41,916
I'm a robot.
164
00:12:42,000 --> 00:12:44,625
You did not solve their problems.
165
00:12:44,708 --> 00:12:47,708
I did. It can't be done.
166
00:12:47,791 --> 00:12:51,666
Don't you sleep better
when you know it can't be done?
167
00:12:51,750 --> 00:12:54,791
Horia? Do a Macarena, dude!
168
00:12:55,791 --> 00:12:57,041
Let's do it!
169
00:12:57,750 --> 00:13:02,416
Macarena!
He goes through five calls in 30 seconds.
170
00:13:03,000 --> 00:13:05,333
You don't believe it? Just watch.
171
00:13:05,416 --> 00:13:07,291
Nipple!
172
00:13:08,541 --> 00:13:10,416
Two, three and go.
173
00:13:10,500 --> 00:13:12,791
You called the IRS.
We close accounts. Hello?
174
00:13:13,833 --> 00:13:16,041
You're live with Oreste!
175
00:13:16,125 --> 00:13:21,750
Hello? Thank you for donating
two Euros for… Hello?
176
00:13:21,833 --> 00:13:26,125
You fucking bastard, if you call my wife
one more time, I'll… Hello?
177
00:13:26,208 --> 00:13:30,833
I'm Florin Piersic
and I'm so happy to talk to someone.
178
00:13:30,916 --> 00:13:34,458
I miss talking to… Hello?
179
00:13:34,541 --> 00:13:38,291
-What's the time?
-21 seconds.
180
00:13:38,375 --> 00:13:40,833
-Great job!
-Yes! A new record.
181
00:13:40,916 --> 00:13:42,375
Excellent work!
182
00:13:45,458 --> 00:13:47,791
Welcome to FU Global.
183
00:13:48,708 --> 00:13:50,791
-Yes.
-We believe in inclusion.
184
00:13:50,875 --> 00:13:53,250
I forgot my wallet. Please let me in.
185
00:13:54,458 --> 00:13:56,125
-Name?
-Horia.
186
00:13:56,208 --> 00:13:59,291
-Horia what?
-We are a big family here.
187
00:13:59,375 --> 00:14:00,333
Horia Brenciu.
188
00:14:01,583 --> 00:14:02,625
Do you have ID?
189
00:14:02,708 --> 00:14:06,541
I just said I forgot my wallet.
I don't have ID on me.
190
00:14:07,333 --> 00:14:08,625
Security!
191
00:14:10,750 --> 00:14:16,416
She called the special forces!
Sit down before you have a stroke.
192
00:14:16,500 --> 00:14:20,083
-You have heart pills in that canister?
-Grațiela, right?
193
00:14:20,958 --> 00:14:23,125
Weren't you
on season three of Love Island?
194
00:14:24,208 --> 00:14:25,541
Season four!
195
00:14:26,958 --> 00:14:32,000
-Have you considered changing your name?
-Me? The fat guy should change it!
196
00:14:38,041 --> 00:14:40,083
This slut wants money again.
197
00:14:40,875 --> 00:14:42,166
What now?
198
00:14:43,166 --> 00:14:46,833
I'm not giving you anything.
I'm not giving you any money.
199
00:14:48,000 --> 00:14:51,583
Because you're a piece of shit!
200
00:14:51,666 --> 00:14:56,541
The moment mom laid eyes on you,
she said you were gonna fuck up my life.
201
00:14:57,916 --> 00:15:01,333
Even whores have more common sense!
202
00:15:03,458 --> 00:15:06,125
-The wife?
-My son.
203
00:15:09,958 --> 00:15:12,750
-Can you help me out?
-With what?
204
00:15:13,416 --> 00:15:17,208
It's obvious everyone follows your lead.
205
00:15:17,291 --> 00:15:19,541
-Do you think you could…
-What?
206
00:15:20,958 --> 00:15:25,125
-Please make them like me!
-How can I do that?
207
00:15:25,208 --> 00:15:27,791
I don't know. Ask them to come in on time.
208
00:15:27,875 --> 00:15:29,541
How could I ask them that?
209
00:15:29,625 --> 00:15:33,500
Then just encourage them
to be more productive.
210
00:15:33,583 --> 00:15:38,375
I'm just an employee. I don't know how.
211
00:15:38,458 --> 00:15:42,000
You know what? Screw that crap!
212
00:15:45,416 --> 00:15:48,083
Do you think I enjoy
being on your territory?
213
00:15:48,166 --> 00:15:51,041
Don't you think I have testicles? I do!
214
00:15:51,125 --> 00:15:54,916
But I act like a man
and I leave my balls at the door.
215
00:15:56,875 --> 00:15:58,250
Okay. Deal!
216
00:16:02,750 --> 00:16:08,250
Guys! Listen up! He has testicles!
217
00:16:16,875 --> 00:16:19,666
Can I take another one?
I have a twin that eats a lot.
218
00:16:19,750 --> 00:16:23,625
And this is for my twin cousin.
He's a good guy.
219
00:16:23,708 --> 00:16:25,916
-Take as much as you need.
-Thank you!
220
00:16:26,000 --> 00:16:28,833
As team leader,
221
00:16:28,916 --> 00:16:34,250
it is my duty
to place the team's needs first.
222
00:16:40,375 --> 00:16:42,500
-Go ahead!
-You've got dessert, Onel.
223
00:16:42,583 --> 00:16:43,958
It's dessert?
224
00:16:44,041 --> 00:16:48,000
It's a wet paper towel.
Like toilet paper, but better.
225
00:17:02,666 --> 00:17:04,083
Oh yes!
226
00:17:06,666 --> 00:17:09,458
Șerban, I feel so loved right now.
227
00:17:12,500 --> 00:17:15,875
Can anyone tell me what this is?
228
00:17:18,958 --> 00:17:20,375
Onel?
229
00:17:21,291 --> 00:17:23,875
-Balls!
-What? No!
230
00:17:23,958 --> 00:17:26,166
-Two balls.
-No.
231
00:17:27,791 --> 00:17:31,333
Can anyone tell me
what this looks like now?
232
00:17:32,791 --> 00:17:33,791
Șerban!
233
00:17:33,875 --> 00:17:38,375
-Two hairy balls?
-Synergy!
234
00:17:38,458 --> 00:17:39,875
It's obvious it's synergy!
235
00:17:41,166 --> 00:17:44,625
I'm sorry. It's just… it's synergy.
236
00:17:45,583 --> 00:17:48,125
Does anyone know what synergy is?
Of course not!
237
00:17:48,208 --> 00:17:50,958
The coordination between
two entities to gain an effect
238
00:17:51,041 --> 00:17:53,916
greater than if taking
the two individually.
239
00:17:58,375 --> 00:18:03,541
-You're so stupid, Lorena!
-No, no! Well done, Lorena! She's right!
240
00:18:03,625 --> 00:18:06,416
-'Well done, Lorena!'
-No, dude. Listen up.
241
00:18:06,500 --> 00:18:10,250
It means that two balls together
242
00:18:10,333 --> 00:18:12,500
are better than one.
243
00:18:13,208 --> 00:18:17,041
Okay. Apparently we'll go with testicles.
244
00:18:18,000 --> 00:18:19,125
Right.
245
00:18:19,208 --> 00:18:23,958
Let's presume this is our company.
And it has…
246
00:18:24,041 --> 00:18:27,083
-The shape of a dick.
-…multiple layers.
247
00:18:28,375 --> 00:18:31,041
-Up here we have the top of…
-The dick.
248
00:18:32,083 --> 00:18:33,000
…pyramid. Leaders.
249
00:18:34,583 --> 00:18:37,666
-Here we have…
-The middle of the dick.
250
00:18:39,583 --> 00:18:41,041
The middle class.
251
00:18:42,333 --> 00:18:43,666
Employees.
252
00:18:44,500 --> 00:18:47,125
-And here we have…
-The base of the penis.
253
00:18:48,125 --> 00:18:49,458
Close enough.
254
00:18:49,541 --> 00:18:54,833
'Low'. Now, what's missing here?
255
00:19:01,583 --> 00:19:03,500
An onion?
256
00:19:03,583 --> 00:19:06,500
-No.
-A pussy.
257
00:19:07,375 --> 00:19:11,833
What does it mean? What does it stand for?
258
00:19:11,916 --> 00:19:14,708
-Sauron's Eye?
-A black hole?
259
00:19:14,791 --> 00:19:17,791
-The Virgin Mary?
-The client!
260
00:19:18,750 --> 00:19:20,333
Look, it's really--
261
00:19:20,416 --> 00:19:25,625
-OK. Now then. Who are we?
-The foreskin.
262
00:19:25,708 --> 00:19:29,083
-What's our mission?
-To screw the client.
263
00:19:29,166 --> 00:19:32,375
-To get?
-Added value.
264
00:19:32,458 --> 00:19:35,875
And this, my friends,
is the definition of capitalism.
265
00:19:43,833 --> 00:19:48,291
-Make yourself comfortable. How is it?
-Great! Things are moving.
266
00:19:48,375 --> 00:19:49,333
Come here!
267
00:19:58,500 --> 00:20:02,875
-What do you think about AI?
-It represents the future.
268
00:20:02,958 --> 00:20:06,250
Exactly! I'm closing down the call center.
269
00:20:06,333 --> 00:20:08,333
-What?
-It was Nicoleta's idea.
270
00:20:08,416 --> 00:20:12,166
It's cheaper to replace operators
with a robot. Watch this!
271
00:20:15,041 --> 00:20:19,000
Hi. I'm Clara. Welcome to FU Global…
272
00:20:22,375 --> 00:20:25,416
-What about the employees?
-What about them?
273
00:20:25,500 --> 00:20:27,583
-What will you do about them?
-Fired!
274
00:20:28,958 --> 00:20:31,666
Don't worry. Starting from September.
275
00:20:31,750 --> 00:20:35,916
If you play nice and befriend Nicoleta,
we'll keep seeing you here.
276
00:20:39,333 --> 00:20:41,541
Why me?
277
00:20:42,500 --> 00:20:46,458
-How are you doing?
-He fired me.
278
00:20:48,750 --> 00:20:52,208
-Help me with this.
-Sure!
279
00:20:52,291 --> 00:20:56,458
Ms. Nico said she can't pay me anymore.
280
00:20:57,291 --> 00:21:02,291
-And who's going to clean now?
-She said she has a robot.
281
00:21:02,375 --> 00:21:06,458
Apparently they can vacuum and mop.
282
00:21:07,083 --> 00:21:11,458
-That's exactly what you were doing.
-Yeah, but the robot speaks English too.
283
00:21:11,541 --> 00:21:13,458
In my day, we studied Russian.
284
00:21:13,541 --> 00:21:15,125
See ya!
285
00:21:21,208 --> 00:21:23,041
This chick is so hot! Swipe!
286
00:21:24,416 --> 00:21:26,958
What if I get you the Happy Cup?
287
00:21:29,250 --> 00:21:31,500
You think you can beat the Transylvanians?
288
00:21:36,083 --> 00:21:39,500
Would that be proof
that the CC department is valuable?
289
00:21:39,583 --> 00:21:43,333
If you get me the cup, I'll make you
project manager by Fall.
290
00:21:46,541 --> 00:21:50,708
If not, at the end of the month
you're all fired.
291
00:21:51,541 --> 00:21:52,875
Good luck!
292
00:21:55,875 --> 00:22:00,875
-I know how it sounds, but…
-Fuck your trip!
293
00:22:01,708 --> 00:22:03,375
I really like you guys.
294
00:22:03,458 --> 00:22:07,375
And I believe this team building
can bring us together.
295
00:22:07,458 --> 00:22:09,083
As friends.
296
00:22:12,416 --> 00:22:16,458
If you help me win the team building,
in two months I'm out of your hair.
297
00:22:17,666 --> 00:22:18,958
I'll leave!
298
00:22:20,125 --> 00:22:23,166
-Two months?
-Two months.
299
00:22:36,833 --> 00:22:39,000
Why are we doing this?
300
00:22:39,083 --> 00:22:45,041
They want us to do team building
to make us happier.
301
00:22:45,125 --> 00:22:49,083
-They should try raising our salaries.
-But how would you be motivated?
302
00:22:49,166 --> 00:22:51,541
Money. That would motivate me.
303
00:22:52,416 --> 00:22:57,416
What the hell does "the theme is
political correctness" mean?
304
00:22:57,500 --> 00:23:00,291
-It seems complicated.
-It's not!
305
00:23:00,375 --> 00:23:06,250
We go there and fight departments
from Craiova, Iași and Transylvania.
306
00:23:06,333 --> 00:23:09,708
They say Cluj is the best.
But they're from Cluj, after all.
307
00:23:09,791 --> 00:23:13,916
-Really? Cluj? Fuck'em!
-The way they speak!
308
00:23:14,583 --> 00:23:19,875
Craiova is surely a bunch of nerdy wusses.
309
00:23:19,958 --> 00:23:23,250
And we can just get Moldavians drunk.
310
00:23:24,250 --> 00:23:28,041
Isn't a team building where people drink
and have sex on the company's expense?
311
00:23:28,125 --> 00:23:29,875
Free beer? I'm in!
312
00:23:30,500 --> 00:23:32,916
Sex? In the vagina?
313
00:23:33,750 --> 00:23:37,083
Yes, Onel. Sex in the vagina.
314
00:23:51,416 --> 00:23:54,958
Șerban! Give me that vodka!
315
00:23:55,875 --> 00:23:58,125
-There you go, baby!
-Thanks!
316
00:23:59,166 --> 00:24:01,541
-You don't drink?
-I do.
317
00:24:04,791 --> 00:24:08,583
-How long have you been working here?
-Six years. Five too many.
318
00:24:08,666 --> 00:24:10,583
Onel, take a picture.
319
00:24:12,375 --> 00:24:15,833
Come on, Șerban.
I don't want to see your nipples. Go away!
320
00:24:15,916 --> 00:24:18,625
-We don't wanna see yours either.
-What do you want?
321
00:24:18,708 --> 00:24:23,541
-I'm surprised you're not team leader.
-Only men get leadership roles, right?
322
00:24:23,625 --> 00:24:24,916
I don't think so.
323
00:24:25,000 --> 00:24:28,375
Then how did you get here?
You have no call center background.
324
00:24:29,041 --> 00:24:33,041
What's the deal
with "political correctness"?
325
00:24:34,791 --> 00:24:36,333
It's an art.
326
00:24:36,416 --> 00:24:40,291
The art of offending someone
without being blunt.
327
00:24:41,250 --> 00:24:46,250
How do you tell someone,
"Shut the fuck up, you idiot?"
328
00:24:47,041 --> 00:24:51,958
You say, "I appreciate your feedback,
and I'll consider it."
329
00:24:52,041 --> 00:24:56,083
-And if you say, 'I don't give a fuck'?
-'Send me an email.'
330
00:24:56,166 --> 00:25:00,208
'Fuck you?' How do you say that?
'Suck it!'
331
00:25:01,750 --> 00:25:03,250
'Kind reminder.'
332
00:25:28,208 --> 00:25:29,541
BUCEGI NATURE RESERVE
333
00:25:42,666 --> 00:25:45,291
MAKING DREAMS COME TRUE IN INSTALLMENTS
334
00:25:46,083 --> 00:25:48,958
It's like a really big park.
335
00:25:54,583 --> 00:25:56,500
Welcome to the Belmont!
336
00:25:56,583 --> 00:26:00,333
Unfortunately, all the rooms are reserved
for the FU Global team building.
337
00:26:01,791 --> 00:26:03,875
We're from the Bucharest call center.
338
00:26:03,958 --> 00:26:05,666
Let me check, please.
339
00:26:06,541 --> 00:26:10,208
FU, FU...
340
00:26:10,958 --> 00:26:13,583
What FU Is this? A different FU.
341
00:26:13,666 --> 00:26:16,416
Sometimes you can't tell
what the FU you're reading.
342
00:26:18,041 --> 00:26:21,750
Found it! There were six rooms.
Now there are only three.
343
00:26:22,500 --> 00:26:26,875
-What?
-Ms. Nicoleta made the reservation.
344
00:26:32,916 --> 00:26:34,375
Where will you sleep?
345
00:26:46,875 --> 00:26:48,541
What are you doing?
346
00:26:49,291 --> 00:26:53,833
What every man does when
he's finally away from his family.
347
00:26:57,791 --> 00:26:59,166
Time to smash some pussy!
348
00:27:00,875 --> 00:27:02,958
At least wait for me to leave the room.
349
00:27:04,833 --> 00:27:08,375
Forgive me! Excuse me!
350
00:27:11,708 --> 00:27:13,500
Close the freaking window!
351
00:27:17,041 --> 00:27:20,083
-Hey!
-Hey! How are you, Nico?
352
00:27:20,166 --> 00:27:24,041
Kind reminder,
starting from now I'm 'Ms.' to you, yes?
353
00:27:24,125 --> 00:27:27,375
-How's the room?
-Perfect! Thanks.
354
00:27:30,875 --> 00:27:32,166
It's the radio.
355
00:27:33,041 --> 00:27:39,000
I know you've never stayed at a four star,
but please don't embarrass the company.
356
00:27:39,666 --> 00:27:41,375
Don't get wasted!
357
00:27:45,958 --> 00:27:48,166
Hey! What are you doing?
358
00:27:51,291 --> 00:27:52,791
Tits--
359
00:27:59,250 --> 00:28:01,000
Okay. I'll have a beer as well.
360
00:28:04,916 --> 00:28:06,250
Tits!
361
00:28:07,041 --> 00:28:10,166
-Are you trying to say you saw breasts?
-Yes!
362
00:28:14,541 --> 00:28:17,541
-Someone else arrived?
-The Moldavians. They're at the pool.
363
00:28:18,333 --> 00:28:20,125
Nice. We have a pool!
364
00:28:48,958 --> 00:28:50,333
That one is mine!
365
00:28:50,416 --> 00:28:52,916
-The first one is mine! I called it.
-That's mine!
366
00:28:53,000 --> 00:28:55,791
Stop it! Don't embarrass me, please.
367
00:28:59,750 --> 00:29:01,333
-Hey!
-Hey!
368
00:29:02,125 --> 00:29:05,916
I'm Emil, and I'm senior team leader
at the Bucharest call center.
369
00:29:06,000 --> 00:29:07,250
They're my colleagues.
370
00:29:07,333 --> 00:29:10,333
-Andreea. Logistics lead.
-Lavinia.
371
00:29:10,416 --> 00:29:12,250
- Sandra. Nice to meet you.
-Luiza.
372
00:29:12,333 --> 00:29:13,833
-Bianca.
-I'm Maria.
373
00:29:13,916 --> 00:29:15,833
-Yeah, cool!
-Good for you!
374
00:29:15,916 --> 00:29:18,708
It seems the Cluj team is late.
375
00:29:20,083 --> 00:29:22,000
How about some volleyball?
376
00:29:23,500 --> 00:29:26,250
-Big fan.
-Onel, you're the goalkeeper.
377
00:30:35,916 --> 00:30:38,000
And what did you do last night?
378
00:30:38,625 --> 00:30:40,375
-Really?
- Yeah.
379
00:30:42,375 --> 00:30:48,000
-Sorry about earlier. Are you okay?
-Yeah! I'm fine!
380
00:30:48,083 --> 00:30:50,125
What challenge scares you the most?
381
00:30:50,833 --> 00:30:55,000
I wouldn't say they scare me.
You know how it is when you're in charge.
382
00:30:55,083 --> 00:30:56,708
You have responsibilities.
383
00:30:56,791 --> 00:31:01,083
-Is this your first time?
-On team building? We also came last year.
384
00:31:01,166 --> 00:31:03,458
The guys from Cluj won that as well.
385
00:31:04,500 --> 00:31:07,208
I heard they're…
386
00:31:08,666 --> 00:31:12,625
-Rough.
-No. They're okay.
387
00:31:23,541 --> 00:31:24,833
One of ours!
388
00:31:37,500 --> 00:31:40,041
I'm more scared
of the stags from Craiova.
389
00:31:44,166 --> 00:31:45,000
Who?
390
00:31:47,625 --> 00:31:48,875
The Internal Audit guys.
391
00:32:04,625 --> 00:32:06,208
Quiet! We're here!
392
00:32:07,541 --> 00:32:12,000
Hey, bro! I'm Laurențiu.
Consulting manager for Internal Audit.
393
00:32:12,083 --> 00:32:15,041
Hi. Emil! Senior team leader,
Bucharest call center.
394
00:32:15,125 --> 00:32:19,416
Great. This weekend call me 'Dread'.
395
00:32:21,750 --> 00:32:28,208
I'm Resin, this is Sharky, Shabby,
396
00:32:28,291 --> 00:32:30,333
Scandal and Mihai.
397
00:32:30,416 --> 00:32:36,791
-Hi, everyone!
-Shut the fuck up and grab the luggage!
398
00:32:39,166 --> 00:32:43,083
-Hi, baby! Did you miss me?
-You're still a bunch of pigs.
399
00:32:43,166 --> 00:32:44,250
Yeah, and you're…
400
00:32:46,375 --> 00:32:48,041
still beautiful.
401
00:32:50,083 --> 00:32:51,500
Pay attention!
402
00:32:51,583 --> 00:32:53,500
This is too much!
403
00:32:53,583 --> 00:32:56,541
Are they for real?
404
00:32:58,000 --> 00:33:00,166
Auditing isn't easy.
405
00:33:00,250 --> 00:33:03,666
They count thousands of euros
14 hours a day.
406
00:33:04,916 --> 00:33:08,750
They use these three days to make up
for having no life the other 362.
407
00:33:09,875 --> 00:33:12,000
Couldn't we be more like them?
408
00:33:15,208 --> 00:33:16,583
Good afternoon!
409
00:33:17,250 --> 00:33:19,000
We got hoes here as well?
410
00:33:21,000 --> 00:33:21,958
Nice.
411
00:33:22,041 --> 00:33:24,333
That's Horia. He's from Titan.
412
00:33:24,416 --> 00:33:27,208
He survived a stroke.
413
00:33:28,291 --> 00:33:30,000
Sit down and shut up!
414
00:33:31,416 --> 00:33:33,250
-Dude!
-Yeah!
415
00:33:57,000 --> 00:33:58,958
Let's talk to the guys.
416
00:33:59,791 --> 00:34:03,916
-Hi!
-Don't drink too much!
417
00:34:04,958 --> 00:34:08,291
-Come on.
-Sure, Dad.
418
00:34:08,375 --> 00:34:10,500
Look at that one.
419
00:34:14,791 --> 00:34:17,500
Yo, fat guy! Bring the shade over here!
420
00:34:19,958 --> 00:34:21,541
-Call it!
-Head.
421
00:34:21,625 --> 00:34:23,958
-Nope.
-Hit him!
422
00:34:25,166 --> 00:34:28,583
-Cheers!
-Cheers!
423
00:34:28,666 --> 00:34:32,166
Hey, guys,
I know it's your first team building
424
00:34:32,250 --> 00:34:36,125
and you're not used to the free stuff,
but let's not get wasted.
425
00:34:36,208 --> 00:34:38,041
Calm down, boss.
426
00:34:38,125 --> 00:34:43,916
-Firstly, the stags are more wasted.
-Firstly, the Cluj team are a pity bunch.
427
00:34:44,000 --> 00:34:46,541
They haven't even made it here in time.
428
00:34:46,625 --> 00:34:50,625
-Cheers!
-Cheers!
429
00:34:50,708 --> 00:34:53,875
Cluj is here!
430
00:35:21,166 --> 00:35:25,916
Hi, everyone! So nice seeing you girls.
431
00:35:26,500 --> 00:35:29,416
Oy, so good to be here.
432
00:35:31,041 --> 00:35:33,500
Raul! Sales Manager.
433
00:35:33,583 --> 00:35:39,416
These are my colleagues. But I'll let them
introduce themselves, as is right.
434
00:35:39,500 --> 00:35:45,833
-Tase! My highest esteem goes out to you.
-Erika! I congratulate you already.
435
00:35:45,916 --> 00:35:48,708
-Why are they talking funny?
-Funny how?
436
00:35:48,791 --> 00:35:53,500
-Like they're lying.
-Kika! I bow to you.
437
00:35:53,583 --> 00:35:56,791
Popa! Aka Brain. I love you all.
438
00:35:56,875 --> 00:36:01,083
Paul! So sorry for being late.
439
00:36:01,166 --> 00:36:03,666
Don't worry.
That's just your genes. A bit slower.
440
00:36:06,958 --> 00:36:09,791
We were supposed to be here at 12:00,
441
00:36:09,875 --> 00:36:14,166
but we decided to stop
for a few hours to meditate at Simidiu.
442
00:36:14,250 --> 00:36:17,958
-Do you know where that is?
-Close to Blabanos.
443
00:36:19,208 --> 00:36:20,625
Did you hear that?
444
00:36:20,708 --> 00:36:26,625
Are these villages or flowers?
445
00:36:31,041 --> 00:36:32,291
So funny!
446
00:36:32,375 --> 00:36:38,375
There were two priests reconditioning
an orphanage and we just had to help.
447
00:36:39,750 --> 00:36:41,500
I'm gonna cry.
448
00:36:41,583 --> 00:36:47,500
We cried when the little guys smiled.
449
00:36:47,583 --> 00:36:49,458
Oy...
450
00:36:49,541 --> 00:36:52,375
Why didn't you adopt a few, oy?
451
00:36:52,458 --> 00:36:55,000
-What?
-What?
452
00:36:55,083 --> 00:37:00,000
-You don't joke about that.
-I'm so happy to see you.
453
00:37:00,083 --> 00:37:04,958
Let's check you in!
The challenges begin tomorrow.
454
00:37:05,041 --> 00:37:07,291
Easy!
455
00:37:09,500 --> 00:37:13,166
She spent two seconds with them
and now she already talks like them.
456
00:37:22,500 --> 00:37:26,541
How are they so fucking perfect?
457
00:37:26,625 --> 00:37:28,166
I want one too.
458
00:37:28,250 --> 00:37:32,958
Jesus! Lorena, cover up your lungs
before you catch a cold.
459
00:37:33,833 --> 00:37:36,958
They're breasts, not lungs, moron.
Suck a fucking dick!
460
00:37:37,041 --> 00:37:39,458
-Wow, guys!
-You're a slut!
461
00:37:39,541 --> 00:37:40,875
-Fuck off!
-Dumbass!
462
00:37:40,958 --> 00:37:42,875
Guys! Stop it!
463
00:37:42,958 --> 00:37:47,083
Let's go mingle and show them
they don't intimidate us.
464
00:37:48,375 --> 00:37:49,666
Watch this!
465
00:37:54,166 --> 00:37:55,625
Hey, dude!
466
00:37:56,833 --> 00:37:59,166
Where can I get something to smoke?
467
00:38:02,666 --> 00:38:05,416
Hi! Want to drink a beer? Beer!
Grab a beer?
468
00:38:06,291 --> 00:38:10,750
Oy! No, thank you.
Sorry, I don't drink beer.
469
00:38:10,833 --> 00:38:14,708
I only drink liquor made by my gramps,
470
00:38:14,791 --> 00:38:20,875
who instilled in me
a deep love of nature, especially--
471
00:38:21,541 --> 00:38:26,458
Triathlon is my passion.
But I also love curling, and--
472
00:38:26,541 --> 00:38:32,875
Yoga. It's so good for you.
It relaxes all your joints.
473
00:38:32,958 --> 00:38:37,791
And here, this bruise I got
when I fell off the bike
474
00:38:37,875 --> 00:38:41,875
on our ecologically illuminated
biker rails in Cluj--
475
00:38:41,958 --> 00:38:44,875
Between the free parking
476
00:38:44,958 --> 00:38:47,083
and the five-star vegan restaurant
477
00:38:47,166 --> 00:38:51,416
built in a mansion
that dates back to when Austria was--
478
00:38:51,500 --> 00:38:56,458
We would have been years ahead
of the South easily--
479
00:38:56,541 --> 00:38:58,750
Easily.
480
00:39:11,916 --> 00:39:16,541
-I fucking hate them!
-Stop it! Mountains are nice. Mountains!
481
00:39:17,500 --> 00:39:21,541
I'll go drink with the guys from Craiova.
Are you coming, dude?
482
00:39:21,625 --> 00:39:24,208
Let me be, dude!
483
00:39:25,916 --> 00:39:29,416
What's with this chick? Come on!
484
00:39:35,125 --> 00:39:37,000
Onel! Not like that!
485
00:39:40,208 --> 00:39:42,250
Wait! Onel!
486
00:39:49,666 --> 00:39:50,875
BABY EAGLE
487
00:39:50,958 --> 00:39:53,666
-Cheers!
-Cheers!
488
00:39:53,750 --> 00:39:54,833
God bless!
489
00:40:05,583 --> 00:40:07,833
You know what I love about you guys?
490
00:40:09,083 --> 00:40:11,000
That you don't give a fuck about this.
491
00:40:11,708 --> 00:40:15,500
That's because we didn't come to win.
492
00:40:15,583 --> 00:40:20,791
We came to get wasted and to finally
get away from our families.
493
00:40:28,250 --> 00:40:31,708
Bro, I have a bit of cokes.
494
00:40:32,958 --> 00:40:37,666
-Do you want some 'cokes'?
-What's 'cokes'?
495
00:40:38,333 --> 00:40:43,666
-Dust from the wings of angels.
-Then I'd like a bit.
496
00:40:44,666 --> 00:40:47,416
Brother!
497
00:40:47,500 --> 00:40:53,791
-We'll start our own software company.
-And sell trips to the Danube Delta.
498
00:40:53,875 --> 00:40:56,041
-Give it to him!
-Do it!
499
00:41:08,750 --> 00:41:10,708
Hey! Whatcha doin'?
500
00:41:10,791 --> 00:41:14,125
We're playing potato to the sack.
Ever played that?
501
00:41:14,208 --> 00:41:18,416
You have to catch a potato in your nuts.
If you miss it, we kick your ass.
502
00:41:18,500 --> 00:41:20,541
Best game ever!
503
00:41:20,625 --> 00:41:24,750
Seems simple, but you need
good pelvis movement.
504
00:41:24,833 --> 00:41:26,041
Hit him!
505
00:41:32,000 --> 00:41:33,916
What was that?
506
00:41:34,000 --> 00:41:36,708
I'll fucking kill you all! Enough!
507
00:41:41,125 --> 00:41:42,166
Hey!
508
00:41:45,166 --> 00:41:48,083
-You got the wrong room.
-I got drunk and now I wanna fuck.
509
00:41:49,583 --> 00:41:50,875
With whom?
510
00:42:03,625 --> 00:42:05,416
-No!
-No? Why?
511
00:42:05,500 --> 00:42:07,583
Cause we're colleagues?
512
00:42:07,666 --> 00:42:13,166
What happens in team building,
stays in team building. Bossman!
513
00:42:16,750 --> 00:42:17,666
Sorry!
514
00:42:18,416 --> 00:42:23,125
You check out all the girls here,
but not me, right?
515
00:42:23,208 --> 00:42:25,500
I don't count for you?
516
00:42:25,583 --> 00:42:28,791
Lorena isn't a woman!
Lorena is one of the guys!
517
00:42:28,875 --> 00:42:32,333
No! Why would you say that?
That's not how it is.
518
00:42:32,416 --> 00:42:34,958
You're just part of the team.
Don't you want that?
519
00:42:35,041 --> 00:42:37,958
I want someone to look my ass.
520
00:42:39,791 --> 00:42:43,708
I haven't had sex in a year.
I thought I'd fuck someone here.
521
00:42:43,791 --> 00:42:46,416
So we can both regret it the next day.
522
00:42:46,500 --> 00:42:49,875
Then we'll stop talking for half a year.
Like normal people do.
523
00:42:50,666 --> 00:42:55,333
I swear that no man can make
a woman feel regret as much as I can.
524
00:42:56,708 --> 00:43:02,291
It's just that I just broke up with
someone, and I can't. For various reasons.
525
00:43:03,125 --> 00:43:06,958
But I respect you as a human being,
colleague and woman.
526
00:43:08,375 --> 00:43:10,250
You fucking pussy!
527
00:43:13,541 --> 00:43:17,083
It feels so good inside!
528
00:43:22,166 --> 00:43:23,458
Oy!
529
00:43:33,333 --> 00:43:35,333
Down!
530
00:43:35,416 --> 00:43:41,000
Welcome to the Happiness Cup!
A FU Global tradition since 2017.
531
00:43:41,083 --> 00:43:43,416
There are four challenges.
532
00:43:43,500 --> 00:43:47,333
The team that wins one
earns a smiley face.
533
00:43:47,416 --> 00:43:51,083
At the end, the team
with the most smiley faces wins.
534
00:43:51,166 --> 00:43:57,416
And, as we're used by now,
the Transylvanians win all the smiles.
535
00:43:57,500 --> 00:44:01,625
Are you ready? We will start with… Marian!
536
00:44:02,791 --> 00:44:04,083
Team Trivia!
537
00:44:04,166 --> 00:44:05,458
JESUS
538
00:44:05,541 --> 00:44:10,083
-He died for our sins.
-Vadim. Corneliu Vadim Tudor.
539
00:44:10,166 --> 00:44:11,500
No...
540
00:44:14,041 --> 00:44:16,000
He betrayed Craiova.
541
00:44:17,916 --> 00:44:19,291
All!
542
00:44:20,750 --> 00:44:27,208
-We all have! True!
-We're all here!
543
00:44:27,291 --> 00:44:28,250
BECALI
544
00:44:28,875 --> 00:44:32,375
-Money. Wool. Politics.
-Jews. Soros.
545
00:44:32,458 --> 00:44:34,000
Jews, right?
546
00:44:34,083 --> 00:44:36,166
-She's married.
-She's married.
547
00:44:36,791 --> 00:44:39,291
-She wears colorful outfits.
-Colorful outfits.
548
00:44:39,375 --> 00:44:41,083
-Blond hair.
-Blond hair.
549
00:44:41,166 --> 00:44:43,375
EINSTEIN
550
00:44:43,458 --> 00:44:48,458
E = mc².
551
00:44:48,541 --> 00:44:54,625
Albert Einstein. March 14th, 1879.
552
00:44:57,291 --> 00:45:00,625
-Window. Billionaire. He invented…
-Gates.
553
00:45:01,958 --> 00:45:04,583
Controlled by Jews,
who want to exterminate us all.
554
00:45:05,500 --> 00:45:06,916
Okay!
555
00:45:11,125 --> 00:45:14,541
Team Trust is based
on absolute trust in your teammates.
556
00:45:16,541 --> 00:45:18,000
Oh my God!
557
00:45:30,791 --> 00:45:32,291
Good job, bro!
558
00:45:32,375 --> 00:45:34,291
Come on, guys! We can do this.
559
00:45:35,208 --> 00:45:39,125
-Where's Horia?
-Hey, guys!
560
00:45:39,916 --> 00:45:42,541
This is how we do it!
561
00:46:03,375 --> 00:46:06,708
-Are you okay?
-God?
562
00:46:06,791 --> 00:46:08,541
Is that You?
563
00:46:08,625 --> 00:46:13,583
You finally broke the elevator.
Help me up.
564
00:46:19,875 --> 00:46:24,083
What? That's it?
Is it Monday already? It was fun!
565
00:46:28,833 --> 00:46:30,583
See you next year!
566
00:46:42,833 --> 00:46:47,583
-I guess it counts. You get the point.
-Yes!
567
00:46:49,041 --> 00:46:51,083
That's how you do it!
568
00:46:51,166 --> 00:46:53,333
TEAM CLUJ - IAȘI - BUCHAREST - CRAIOVA
569
00:47:01,041 --> 00:47:05,250
-Great comeback.
-It's just one point.
570
00:47:05,333 --> 00:47:07,583
Still, no one expected it.
571
00:47:09,708 --> 00:47:11,541
I know my team!
572
00:47:12,500 --> 00:47:16,333
I'm happy to see a different kind
of people at these events.
573
00:47:16,416 --> 00:47:19,708
I hope those monsters
don't scare you too much.
574
00:47:19,791 --> 00:47:22,583
-A shot?
-I don't drink.
575
00:47:22,666 --> 00:47:24,083
Why? Are you a wuss?
576
00:47:25,708 --> 00:47:29,541
-What?
-It's okay to take a sip once in a while.
577
00:47:40,250 --> 00:47:42,166
Just don't tell my colleagues.
578
00:47:47,833 --> 00:47:50,500
Congratulations! You won one point.
579
00:47:51,291 --> 00:47:54,666
-Too bad it will be your last.
-It won't be our last.
580
00:47:54,750 --> 00:48:00,000
Looking at you monkeys, I won't have
to wait a few months to shut you down.
581
00:48:00,583 --> 00:48:04,000
I have complete confidence
you'll do that by yourselves by Monday.
582
00:48:09,583 --> 00:48:15,375
My dears, the next one is
my favorite challenge: Team Karaoke.
583
00:48:15,458 --> 00:48:19,333
I look forward to seeing which songs
you've prepared for this.
584
00:48:19,416 --> 00:48:20,666
You start, Craiova!
585
00:48:25,125 --> 00:48:28,333
I don't have a gang, I have men in black
586
00:48:28,416 --> 00:48:31,541
I appear like the AntichristAnd they bow in front of me
587
00:48:32,666 --> 00:48:36,083
Half of them have pure soulsThe other half are broken
588
00:48:36,166 --> 00:48:39,375
I sweep them off
589
00:48:39,458 --> 00:48:41,916
I'm free at the seaside
590
00:48:42,000 --> 00:48:47,041
I'm with you at the beachWe're making love on the hot sand
591
00:48:47,125 --> 00:48:49,375
I'm not a nice girl anymore
592
00:48:50,000 --> 00:48:55,458
This song is for all
the women in this team building.
593
00:48:57,166 --> 00:49:02,750
When I'm with you and I feel good
594
00:49:02,833 --> 00:49:06,125
-I just follow my heart
-I'm gonna kill that motherfucker!
595
00:49:07,458 --> 00:49:12,541
The sea is blue, you're beautiful.
596
00:49:12,625 --> 00:49:16,833
I just follow my heart
597
00:49:18,291 --> 00:49:22,583
Sunny outside, spring all around
598
00:49:22,666 --> 00:49:25,916
I just follow my heart
599
00:49:26,791 --> 00:49:30,541
Don't ask
600
00:49:30,625 --> 00:49:34,333
I just follow my heart
601
00:49:40,583 --> 00:49:41,791
Yeah!
602
00:49:41,875 --> 00:49:47,458
Amazing! Congrats! I love Horia Brenciu!
603
00:49:47,541 --> 00:49:51,958
Bravo! Well done!
604
00:49:53,333 --> 00:49:56,041
Bucharest is next! Applause, please!
605
00:50:07,916 --> 00:50:11,250
Big assholes, small assholesGirls with small tits
606
00:50:11,333 --> 00:50:15,041
With big tits or filled with siliconeThey all gathered here
607
00:50:15,125 --> 00:50:17,958
Big holes, small holes!
608
00:50:18,041 --> 00:50:23,125
Thank you, Dorina! Amazing, well done!
609
00:50:23,208 --> 00:50:25,708
We're still choosing our song.
Just on sec.
610
00:50:25,791 --> 00:50:30,708
-Where did you learn that?
-From my first boyfriend, when I was 13.
611
00:50:30,791 --> 00:50:34,500
-Wow! Where did you grow up?
-In Colentina.
612
00:50:53,125 --> 00:50:58,791
I see your tormentAnd I see you don't dare
613
00:50:58,875 --> 00:51:01,750
To tell me what's going on
614
00:51:03,166 --> 00:51:08,625
But I know that you can't hide
615
00:51:08,708 --> 00:51:14,333
Don't look for another wayHot hands once more
616
00:51:14,416 --> 00:51:20,458
And another night of longingOther hands are reaching to you
617
00:51:20,541 --> 00:51:26,250
But you'll always be
618
00:51:27,041 --> 00:51:29,250
Simply passing by
619
00:51:30,000 --> 00:51:35,208
You don't know what to tell meI see that you're searching
620
00:51:36,083 --> 00:51:38,708
Words full of lies
621
00:51:39,583 --> 00:51:41,500
But it's no use
622
00:51:41,583 --> 00:51:47,708
Because you've always been
623
00:51:47,791 --> 00:51:50,833
An actor in a hurry
624
00:51:51,791 --> 00:51:57,458
Who delivers his line and leaves smilingly
625
00:51:57,541 --> 00:52:02,083
An actor in a hurry who already forgot
626
00:52:02,166 --> 00:52:06,250
What he said on stage
627
00:52:06,333 --> 00:52:09,541
An actor in a hurry
628
00:52:10,250 --> 00:52:15,583
Who leaves right after the play
629
00:52:15,666 --> 00:52:18,250
Happy that the part was easy
630
00:52:18,333 --> 00:52:22,583
He has the voice of an angel.
A stupid angel.
631
00:52:23,333 --> 00:52:26,833
Another stage
632
00:52:36,375 --> 00:52:41,166
-Bravo!
-Onel!
633
00:52:41,250 --> 00:52:44,166
Onel!
634
00:52:45,000 --> 00:52:47,458
-Cheers to Onel!
-To Onel!
635
00:52:47,541 --> 00:52:48,666
Thank you.
636
00:52:49,250 --> 00:52:51,375
Where did you learn to sing like that?
637
00:52:52,291 --> 00:52:56,333
-In the shower. When I was a kid.
-You must have showered a lot!
638
00:52:57,333 --> 00:53:01,000
Not at all. My parents used to lock me up
in there when they went out.
639
00:53:01,083 --> 00:53:03,625
And leave the music on
so I wouldn't feel alone.
640
00:53:03,708 --> 00:53:07,458
-That's for dogs, not for humans.
-Oh, no. They always took Bobby.
641
00:53:08,500 --> 00:53:13,041
It's obvious to everyone who deserves
to win the karaoke round, right?
642
00:53:13,125 --> 00:53:13,958
Onel!
643
00:53:15,166 --> 00:53:20,833
Congratulations to team Transylvanial!
644
00:53:23,541 --> 00:53:25,791
Boo! Thieves!
645
00:53:25,875 --> 00:53:29,708
-Thieves!
-Enough!
646
00:53:29,791 --> 00:53:32,125
-Thieves!
-Stop it!
647
00:53:32,208 --> 00:53:38,666
I have a surprise for all of you.
648
00:53:39,458 --> 00:53:42,375
Mr. Oprea just checked in
649
00:53:42,458 --> 00:53:47,333
and he will join us
for this year's team building.
650
00:53:47,416 --> 00:53:49,333
Applause!
651
00:53:49,416 --> 00:53:51,583
Go, Mr. Oprea!
652
00:53:53,833 --> 00:53:56,083
Raul! Let's go to bed,
653
00:53:56,166 --> 00:54:00,083
'cause tomorrow morning
we're doing cardio before breakfast.
654
00:54:00,166 --> 00:54:04,666
Let's sync our watches for yoga.
655
00:54:04,750 --> 00:54:07,916
Speaking of yoga,
I might as well have a drink.
656
00:54:16,500 --> 00:54:20,666
-Dad taught me to do it this way.
-No way!
657
00:54:20,750 --> 00:54:26,541
Bro! The only way to impress in the sack
is to do the alphabet.
658
00:54:26,625 --> 00:54:31,125
But before. If you do it after,
it's like admitting you're a bad lay.
659
00:54:31,208 --> 00:54:32,458
The alphabet?
660
00:54:34,708 --> 00:54:36,125
Pay attention!
661
00:54:36,791 --> 00:54:40,125
-You stick your head between the legs.
-Like this. I'll help.
662
00:54:40,208 --> 00:54:44,333
-I'm the woman.
-He's… I'm…
663
00:54:45,166 --> 00:54:47,958
-I'm you, and he's his wife.
-Get to it already!
664
00:54:48,041 --> 00:54:54,291
-And you start with your tongue: A, B, C…
-A, B, C--
665
00:54:54,375 --> 00:54:57,041
This is simple, because it's half of O.
666
00:54:57,125 --> 00:55:01,625
-And women like that?
-Listen to this guy!
667
00:55:01,708 --> 00:55:05,791
This is how I apologize to my wife.
I tend to make mistakes!
668
00:55:05,875 --> 00:55:11,583
But be careful never to do Z!
Never Z! Got it?
669
00:55:17,708 --> 00:55:21,041
-I really liked you guys.
-Thanks.
670
00:55:21,125 --> 00:55:25,875
Don't worry about it. A great leader
knows when to admit defeat.
671
00:55:25,958 --> 00:55:27,583
Really? Does he?
672
00:55:28,833 --> 00:55:30,000
Yes.
673
00:55:30,083 --> 00:55:34,333
What was that song your colleague sang?
What was the beginning again?
674
00:55:36,000 --> 00:55:38,125
Oh yeah.
675
00:55:39,958 --> 00:55:42,333
'Small derriere, big derriere.
676
00:55:42,416 --> 00:55:46,666
Women with small breasts, big breasts.'
I don't really remember.
677
00:55:48,666 --> 00:55:50,375
You're upset!
678
00:55:51,625 --> 00:55:53,000
Be happy!
679
00:55:53,083 --> 00:55:56,708
It's the last night here.
We're in the middle of nowhere.
680
00:55:56,791 --> 00:55:59,916
-Does your boss know where you are?
-Who cares?
681
00:56:00,875 --> 00:56:03,250
What can she do? Fire me?
682
00:56:04,875 --> 00:56:06,750
I can get another job tomorrow.
683
00:56:06,833 --> 00:56:11,250
As long as I have no installments,
I'm free to do whatever I want.
684
00:56:11,333 --> 00:56:13,625
-You're right!
-Yup!
685
00:56:13,708 --> 00:56:15,125
-Fudge it!
-Yes!
686
00:56:15,208 --> 00:56:19,083
Fudge it! Fudge it!
687
00:56:19,166 --> 00:56:20,708
I'm so wild.
688
00:56:22,041 --> 00:56:25,500
-You plan on getting in this company?
-No!
689
00:56:26,833 --> 00:56:30,458
I just want some peace and quiet.
My own place.
690
00:56:31,000 --> 00:56:32,083
Your B&B.
691
00:56:33,583 --> 00:56:35,250
Not follow orders.
692
00:56:35,958 --> 00:56:38,916
-Be able to take care…
-Of yourself.
693
00:56:53,291 --> 00:56:57,708
I'm sorry! Thank you.
You're really beautiful,
694
00:56:57,791 --> 00:57:02,583
but the company strictly forbids
any sexual relations between employees.
695
00:57:02,666 --> 00:57:05,166
I want you to spank me
while I spit on your back.
696
00:57:07,125 --> 00:57:08,583
Excuse me?
697
00:57:08,666 --> 00:57:10,708
Technically, it isn't sex.
698
00:57:22,208 --> 00:57:24,500
Yup! That's an erection!
699
00:57:25,541 --> 00:57:26,750
-Let's go!
-Man!
700
00:57:27,708 --> 00:57:32,625
-Give me the tobacco.
-There you go!
701
00:57:36,166 --> 00:57:37,791
Open it.
702
00:57:37,875 --> 00:57:43,666
So that's what Sartre was saying.
703
00:57:43,750 --> 00:57:47,166
-What's that? I saw you, Onel!
-Fuck me!
704
00:57:47,250 --> 00:57:49,708
Stop running away! I saw you!
705
00:57:49,791 --> 00:57:53,333
What's that? I hope it's not what I think!
706
00:57:53,416 --> 00:57:58,125
Mr. Oprea! Apologies, but these thugs
brought drugs here.
707
00:57:58,208 --> 00:58:02,083
Even though our policy forbids it!
708
00:58:03,666 --> 00:58:07,708
I'm deeply disappointed that you brought…
709
00:58:09,208 --> 00:58:14,750
this here and hide like rats.
710
00:58:15,500 --> 00:58:18,791
So you can smoke this…
711
00:58:20,041 --> 00:58:22,625
without your bro here!
712
00:58:25,291 --> 00:58:29,166
-You got tobacco? I have paper.
-I have everything.
713
00:58:29,250 --> 00:58:31,416
-Nicoleta, sit down!
-Sit down!
714
00:58:31,500 --> 00:58:34,541
You scared the shit out of me.
715
00:58:52,333 --> 00:58:54,125
How was it?
716
00:58:54,208 --> 00:58:56,416
That was amazing, bro!
717
00:58:59,708 --> 00:59:02,083
These will make you
listen to reggae, Nicoleta!
718
00:59:04,125 --> 00:59:07,791
This is serious stuff, Nicoleta!
Serious stuff!
719
00:59:16,666 --> 00:59:19,000
Take it in! Hold it!
720
00:59:19,083 --> 00:59:23,416
Say this: 'The priest's horses go across,
smoke is coming out their ass'.
721
00:59:23,500 --> 00:59:27,708
The priest's horses go across,
smoke is coming out their ass.
722
00:59:27,791 --> 00:59:29,291
Let it out. Again.
723
00:59:29,375 --> 00:59:32,375
My sweet Mom messaged me
asking if I'd eaten.
724
00:59:33,666 --> 00:59:37,875
Truth is, I haven't in two days
and everything is closed now.
725
00:59:37,958 --> 00:59:39,416
Indeed, everything is closed.
726
00:59:40,541 --> 00:59:43,375
-Room service is open till midnight.
-Shut the hell up!
727
00:59:43,458 --> 00:59:45,625
Shut it, Mike!
728
00:59:45,708 --> 00:59:50,541
-I want real food from home!
-Yeah, real food!
729
00:59:50,625 --> 00:59:56,291
I want a juicy sausage
like Mom used to make at home
730
00:59:56,375 --> 00:59:58,000
after gassing the pig.
731
00:59:58,083 --> 00:59:59,583
Oh, yeah! Real sausage!
732
00:59:59,666 --> 01:00:05,458
And cow cheese, so white and fresh
that you can almost taste the cow.
733
01:00:05,541 --> 01:00:11,125
-True!
-And above all, some leek.
734
01:00:11,208 --> 01:00:15,375
Where the fuck would we get leek
up here, in the mountains?
735
01:00:15,458 --> 01:00:19,750
-Call a delivery guy.
-They won't come!
736
01:00:19,833 --> 01:00:21,875
Hold him down, I'm almost done.
737
01:00:21,958 --> 01:00:23,916
LEEKZILIA
738
01:00:24,000 --> 01:00:26,708
-Do it!
-Sit still, dude!
739
01:01:35,083 --> 01:01:39,000
-You sang okay.
-Really?
740
01:01:41,083 --> 01:01:42,416
So what?
741
01:01:43,750 --> 01:01:47,291
-For an ugly man.
-You're ugly, you…
742
01:01:59,958 --> 01:02:03,333
-Gramercy!
-An offering for our dearly departed.
743
01:02:05,666 --> 01:02:12,583
Sometimes I look at the stars
and my head starts to hurt.
744
01:02:16,333 --> 01:02:20,208
-That's from the 5G satellites.
-What's that?
745
01:02:20,291 --> 01:02:24,666
It's Freemasonry's plan
to control us and keep us poor.
746
01:02:25,375 --> 01:02:27,333
You're so smart!
747
01:02:38,000 --> 01:02:42,583
-What's that?
-Come on, Vlady! Turn that wheel!
748
01:02:42,666 --> 01:02:46,625
Papa wants a full of Jacks!
749
01:02:46,708 --> 01:02:48,958
If you don't take risks,
you don't get drinks!
750
01:02:49,041 --> 01:02:55,125
-Bonus! Go!
-Who the fuck calls at this hour?
751
01:02:55,208 --> 01:02:59,458
-With whom do I have the pleasure?
-Hello! We're from Vlad Casino.
752
01:02:59,541 --> 01:03:01,208
You went over the losing limit.
753
01:03:01,291 --> 01:03:03,375
Listen to this bitch.
754
01:03:03,458 --> 01:03:06,625
-Okay, Ma'am, just one last spin.
-It's not possible. I'm sorry!
755
01:03:06,708 --> 01:03:09,750
-I can feel you're really beautiful.
-Still not possible.
756
01:03:09,833 --> 01:03:11,541
Come on, lady!
757
01:03:11,625 --> 01:03:15,375
-What's happening?
-She's not letting me spin.
758
01:03:16,958 --> 01:03:21,666
-Hello. I wanna speak to your boss.
-My boss?
759
01:03:21,750 --> 01:03:27,375
Vlady! I know he's there.
I'm here with the guys.
760
01:03:27,458 --> 01:03:31,791
-Guys, say hello to Vlady!
-Hi, Vlady!
761
01:03:31,875 --> 01:03:35,375
-Put Vlady on, please.
-Vlady is a cartoon character.
762
01:03:35,458 --> 01:03:37,458
Vlady! My man! Are you there?
763
01:03:38,375 --> 01:03:44,250
Hello, my man! I'm closing for the night!
Going home to my little vamps.
764
01:03:44,333 --> 01:03:48,083
-Go to sleep everyone!
-Got it!
765
01:03:48,750 --> 01:03:53,333
Thanks, Vlady. Kisses!
766
01:03:53,416 --> 01:03:55,708
Is that a blue whale?
767
01:04:17,791 --> 01:04:20,208
Did you write 'Go, Steaua!'?
768
01:04:49,541 --> 01:04:50,416
So?
769
01:04:52,875 --> 01:04:54,625
What did you do last night?
770
01:04:56,791 --> 01:04:59,458
-Nothing!
-I didn't do anything either.
771
01:04:59,541 --> 01:05:05,541
Where'd you go last night, jackass?
I could eat you whole, you cute boy, you!
772
01:05:05,625 --> 01:05:06,875
Sit down.
773
01:05:06,958 --> 01:05:10,666
-Why is Oprea allowing this?
-Nature's circle of life.
774
01:05:11,375 --> 01:05:14,083
Oprea might be the lion,
775
01:05:14,166 --> 01:05:17,625
but even he fears a money checkup
from the jackals.
776
01:05:18,416 --> 01:05:20,458
-Whatever!
-My dears--
777
01:05:21,166 --> 01:05:25,458
today is about learning to cooperate
in the most difficult situations,
778
01:05:25,541 --> 01:05:28,375
like a fantastic team.
779
01:05:28,458 --> 01:05:31,875
-'Fan' as in 'fun'.
-You go, Nicoleta!
780
01:05:31,958 --> 01:05:34,458
I expect all of you on the Happy Meadow.
781
01:05:35,625 --> 01:05:40,291
-I can't do anything while I'm drunk.
-Stop the bullshit! Of course you can.
782
01:05:40,375 --> 01:05:44,416
This country was built on alcohol.
It's being lead on alcohol.
783
01:05:44,500 --> 01:05:47,458
-And you need alcohol to live in it.
-Yes!
784
01:05:47,541 --> 01:05:50,791
And I told them,
"Sure! I'll give it to you."
785
01:05:50,875 --> 01:05:52,875
Please get in line to get it.
786
01:05:53,583 --> 01:05:54,666
Get in line.
787
01:05:59,125 --> 01:06:02,791
This is first class humor.
788
01:06:03,500 --> 01:06:06,750
Nico, I want these guys in Bucharest.
789
01:06:08,041 --> 01:06:11,666
Just come for one year. So I can win
the Cup for once. Name your price.
790
01:06:13,750 --> 01:06:16,833
-You got drunk last night?
-No, I don't drink.
791
01:06:16,916 --> 01:06:22,208
Look how scared he is!
Don't worry, I know my people.
792
01:06:23,541 --> 01:06:25,708
-You see that phony?
-Which one?
793
01:06:25,791 --> 01:06:28,583
The one on the left.
He thinks he's the big dick here.
794
01:06:28,666 --> 01:06:30,458
He wants to take my place.
795
01:06:31,041 --> 01:06:33,708
I heard you won one point. Good job.
796
01:06:33,791 --> 01:06:36,875
-Thank you.
-Not good enough.
797
01:06:37,750 --> 01:06:39,666
You remember our deal.
798
01:06:40,458 --> 01:06:43,250
I want you to win this,
not just participate.
799
01:06:50,125 --> 01:06:53,375
Dear all, there's only one
outdoor challenge left.
800
01:06:53,458 --> 01:06:58,083
Team spirit means everything.
It's time for Team Power.
801
01:06:59,541 --> 01:07:02,750
If the Transylvanians win another one,
everything will be lost.
802
01:07:02,833 --> 01:07:05,166
Let's focus and do this.
803
01:07:05,958 --> 01:07:07,208
Courage!
804
01:07:12,333 --> 01:07:14,208
Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
805
01:07:15,000 --> 01:07:17,208
-Synergy!
-Let's fuck them!
806
01:07:17,291 --> 01:07:18,750
Not what I had in mind.
807
01:07:30,250 --> 01:07:33,250
Don't let them win. Pull!
808
01:07:41,500 --> 01:07:43,208
How did they manage to win?
809
01:07:43,916 --> 01:07:45,666
Yeah, girls!
810
01:07:45,750 --> 01:07:48,208
Get over here, baby! Come here!
811
01:07:52,500 --> 01:07:54,625
You got a little dirty, girl!
812
01:07:56,583 --> 01:07:59,875
-Are you ready?
-Yeah!
813
01:08:02,041 --> 01:08:08,125
-Stay focused! Everything is good!
-That's not fair. There's only four left.
814
01:08:08,208 --> 01:08:12,000
Then let's make it fair. Hold this.
815
01:08:16,791 --> 01:08:18,375
Nicoleta!
816
01:08:19,583 --> 01:08:22,791
You're the man! I love you, dude!
817
01:08:24,833 --> 01:08:28,166
-I saved you this spot.
-Put your hands there!
818
01:08:29,000 --> 01:08:32,625
-Ready?
-Yes!
819
01:08:33,250 --> 01:08:34,375
Go!
820
01:08:36,666 --> 01:08:38,000
Pull!
821
01:08:45,000 --> 01:08:50,208
-Bring on the Cup!
-We won!
822
01:08:54,125 --> 01:08:55,458
Oy!
823
01:08:57,291 --> 01:09:00,083
-What was that?
-No way we're getting Mr. Oprea dirty.
824
01:09:00,666 --> 01:09:03,583
I have installments.
For the house, the car, the dog--
825
01:09:06,333 --> 01:09:09,666
Dumbass contest! Do you have any idea
how much this watch costs?
826
01:09:11,416 --> 01:09:16,500
-Freaking contest! Crazy shit!
-They're badmouthing!
827
01:09:17,916 --> 01:09:19,916
Okay, guys.
828
01:09:20,833 --> 01:09:24,250
-Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
-Let's fuck them up the ass!
829
01:09:24,333 --> 01:09:26,458
Okay. We should plan this.
830
01:10:05,625 --> 01:10:06,750
Yeah!
831
01:10:17,750 --> 01:10:19,083
Good job?
832
01:10:20,208 --> 01:10:22,083
Good job!
833
01:10:22,166 --> 01:10:28,500
My dears, now it looks like there's a tie.
834
01:10:30,833 --> 01:10:34,125
Let's clean up for the last challenge.
835
01:10:34,208 --> 01:10:38,125
Because Bucharest won
by playing dirty in rope pulling,
836
01:10:38,208 --> 01:10:43,166
we have a tie for the first time ever
in the Happy Cup.
837
01:10:44,083 --> 01:10:48,791
-Still, FU Global supports equality--
-Enough, Nicoleta!
838
01:10:48,875 --> 01:10:51,625
Someone has to win.
839
01:10:51,708 --> 01:10:55,708
In the middle of the court
we have the Happy Flag.
840
01:10:55,791 --> 01:11:01,625
The team that gets it and places it
in the adversary's team base, wins.
841
01:11:01,708 --> 01:11:03,875
Good luck!
842
01:11:03,958 --> 01:11:07,875
Transylvania!
843
01:11:16,916 --> 01:11:18,583
Last challenge, everyone.
844
01:11:18,666 --> 01:11:21,791
-No--
-Problem!
845
01:11:22,333 --> 01:11:27,416
Don't forget what we have learned.
It's not important for us to win,
846
01:11:27,500 --> 01:11:29,458
but for the others to lose.
847
01:11:29,541 --> 01:11:32,833
No-- problem!
848
01:11:33,791 --> 01:11:35,583
Let's do this!
849
01:11:35,666 --> 01:11:40,833
Make everyone suffer!
850
01:11:40,916 --> 01:11:42,791
Transylvania is number one!
851
01:11:50,833 --> 01:11:53,541
How the hell do these guys
shoot so goddamn well?
852
01:12:05,458 --> 01:12:09,791
They're hidden inside the base.
Brain, we need a plan.
853
01:12:09,875 --> 01:12:13,458
This is too easy.
Like taking candy from a baby.
854
01:12:14,041 --> 01:12:15,291
Everything is set.
855
01:12:19,333 --> 01:12:20,583
Hey!
856
01:12:22,041 --> 01:12:23,791
Onel, don't!
857
01:12:24,708 --> 01:12:26,791
Tits!
858
01:12:30,000 --> 01:12:31,208
Horia, don't!
859
01:13:02,291 --> 01:13:06,708
Horia!
860
01:13:06,791 --> 01:13:12,000
-Is it you, God?
-No! I'm the real Horia Brenciu.
861
01:13:12,083 --> 01:13:16,583
-I just can't shake this guy.
-Don't worry. It won't be long.
862
01:13:16,666 --> 01:13:18,500
It's not your time yet.
863
01:13:18,583 --> 01:13:22,500
I brought you here,
because you need to change.
864
01:13:23,166 --> 01:13:24,541
Horia…
865
01:13:25,208 --> 01:13:28,833
Life should be lived joyfully.
Not constantly bickering.
866
01:13:30,291 --> 01:13:31,875
I can't believe this shit!
867
01:13:31,958 --> 01:13:34,916
There won't be anyone left
if you continue acting like this.
868
01:13:35,000 --> 01:13:39,041
You, the other Horia Brenciu,
who obviously isn't me.
869
01:13:39,125 --> 01:13:42,875
Take it easy.
Love your family, help your colleagues.
870
01:13:42,958 --> 01:13:45,666
Emil needs you.
871
01:13:45,750 --> 01:13:48,750
You have to win this
or Oprea will fire every one of you.
872
01:13:48,833 --> 01:13:50,958
-What can I do?
-It's easy.
873
01:13:52,041 --> 01:13:56,208
Your superpower is to make everyone
feel like shit.
874
01:13:56,291 --> 01:13:58,541
-Yeah.
-You can use it to do the opposite.
875
01:13:58,625 --> 01:14:03,458
Give Emil back his confidence.
Everything is in your hands.
876
01:14:07,791 --> 01:14:09,791
Not literally.
877
01:14:11,000 --> 01:14:16,333
I never thought I'd say this,
but thank you, real Horia Brenciu.
878
01:14:16,416 --> 01:14:20,708
Everything will work out.
I'll wait for you at the end.
879
01:14:20,791 --> 01:14:23,125
-In Heaven?
-At my concert!
880
01:14:23,208 --> 01:14:26,666
On the 27th and 28th November.
881
01:14:26,750 --> 01:14:30,833
HB Orchestra, ballet. Only 140 lei.
882
01:14:30,916 --> 01:14:35,500
By the way, when you wake up,
Shabby doesn't brush his teeth!
883
01:14:35,583 --> 01:14:39,208
You got everything under control.
Good luck, Horia!
884
01:14:39,291 --> 01:14:41,125
Live your life.
885
01:14:41,208 --> 01:14:44,041
Follow your heart
886
01:14:49,083 --> 01:14:52,458
-What the flying fuck?
-I was helping you, bro!
887
01:14:52,541 --> 01:14:54,958
Did you eat onions? Or was it me?
888
01:14:56,708 --> 01:14:57,791
Time out.
889
01:14:59,375 --> 01:15:00,916
Emil?
890
01:15:02,125 --> 01:15:05,958
Come here! Come!
891
01:15:10,000 --> 01:15:14,083
I told you to let me shut them down.
They're useless!
892
01:15:14,166 --> 01:15:17,958
Thanks. This year,
Cluj will take the Cup again.
893
01:15:18,583 --> 01:15:20,000
Useless!
894
01:15:20,083 --> 01:15:23,166
-What did you do, bossman?
-Why didn't you say anything?
895
01:15:23,250 --> 01:15:24,208
Guys!
896
01:15:24,291 --> 01:15:27,250
I can only say insulting things
towards capitalism.
897
01:15:27,333 --> 01:15:32,291
Guys, if we win, no one will fire you.
If we win, it will be fine.
898
01:15:33,125 --> 01:15:36,875
But what if we don't?
I'll die. It's all my fault.
899
01:15:37,666 --> 01:15:40,750
What have you done, Emil?
900
01:15:44,666 --> 01:15:46,333
Are you okay?
901
01:15:47,416 --> 01:15:51,333
Guys, I think I don't hate
my life anymore.
902
01:15:55,583 --> 01:15:57,000
What's wrong with him?
903
01:16:01,750 --> 01:16:05,208
Hey! A little panic attack.
Don't worry about it.
904
01:16:05,291 --> 01:16:09,416
See you tomorrow at the office.
Please, leave the reports on the desk.
905
01:16:11,583 --> 01:16:13,291
I tried!
906
01:16:13,375 --> 01:16:15,791
Why didn't you tell us
he wants to shut us down?
907
01:16:16,875 --> 01:16:21,541
I didn't want to put pressure on you.
908
01:16:22,875 --> 01:16:25,708
Do you think you're the only one
suffering from anxiety?
909
01:16:26,291 --> 01:16:30,166
Look at this face. See any movement?
910
01:16:30,250 --> 01:16:35,333
No! You know why?
Because I've embraced my anxiety.
911
01:16:35,416 --> 01:16:40,416
And when I was hugging it,
and felt all warm and cuddly,
912
01:16:40,500 --> 01:16:43,875
I bent forward, I took a rock,
and I fucking hit it.
913
01:16:43,958 --> 01:16:46,875
Then it fell to the ground.
You know what I did next?
914
01:16:46,958 --> 01:16:51,041
I kneeled down and fucked the bitch.
915
01:16:51,125 --> 01:16:55,416
Got it? I fucked it. And now I'm all good.
916
01:16:55,500 --> 01:17:00,666
What the fuck was that noise? A bear?
I don't give a fuck if it's a bear!
917
01:17:01,750 --> 01:17:02,750
Feeling better?
918
01:17:04,291 --> 01:17:05,291
Yes!
919
01:17:07,416 --> 01:17:10,041
Okay! All good. I'm okay now!
920
01:17:10,125 --> 01:17:13,375
Bitch. We don't want to get fired.
What's our next move?
921
01:17:14,208 --> 01:17:15,083
What now, boss?
922
01:17:16,666 --> 01:17:18,625
Boss? No one called me 'boss' before.
923
01:17:18,708 --> 01:17:21,583
That's what you call someone
you think is beneath you.
924
01:17:22,208 --> 01:17:27,583
I'm serious. You wanted to be leader.
Now you can do that. Delegate!
925
01:17:28,291 --> 01:17:30,250
Okay. Come here!
926
01:17:30,333 --> 01:17:33,625
Șerban, you ran from the police
all your life, so you're the fastest.
927
01:17:33,708 --> 01:17:35,750
-I need you to distract them.
-Yes, boss!
928
01:17:35,833 --> 01:17:37,041
The rest of you…
929
01:17:39,041 --> 01:17:40,250
Carry on!
930
01:17:53,000 --> 01:17:57,916
-Horia! Kill them! Fuck!
-Let's kill them, Emil!
931
01:18:00,333 --> 01:18:01,583
Stop!
932
01:18:08,291 --> 01:18:10,208
Wait a second!
933
01:18:11,625 --> 01:18:14,416
-What's the hurry?
-Put it down!
934
01:18:16,208 --> 01:18:17,583
Kneel!
935
01:18:20,541 --> 01:18:26,875
-Lick it! Lick it, bitch!
-Dorina! That's a bit too much!
936
01:18:28,333 --> 01:18:34,166
Yes! Go!
937
01:18:46,083 --> 01:18:48,166
Yes!
938
01:18:48,250 --> 01:18:50,000
Good job!
939
01:18:54,333 --> 01:18:59,000
Enough!
940
01:18:59,083 --> 01:19:04,125
Congratulations! I have to admit
that you proved your value here.
941
01:19:05,916 --> 01:19:10,500
The call center department is
an essential part of FU Global.
942
01:19:10,583 --> 01:19:12,708
What do you know? We're essential.
943
01:19:12,791 --> 01:19:16,500
-We might rethink your position.
-No, thanks!
944
01:19:19,625 --> 01:19:22,375
-I'm not staying with you either.
-What will you do?
945
01:19:24,708 --> 01:19:26,708
I resign from FU Global.
946
01:19:29,541 --> 01:19:32,916
Don't be an idiot.
We can rethink your salary as well.
947
01:19:33,708 --> 01:19:37,500
-Let's do it now.
-These things are confidential.
948
01:19:37,583 --> 01:19:43,458
-You come to HR, we negotiate, then--
-My salary is 6.650 lei plus meal tickets.
949
01:19:44,125 --> 01:19:46,750
What? 6.650?
950
01:19:46,833 --> 01:19:48,791
I take home 5.200!
951
01:19:48,875 --> 01:19:53,375
I make 4.500 and I go everywhere
around the country to sell plastic?
952
01:19:53,458 --> 01:19:55,291
You have salaries?
953
01:19:55,375 --> 01:19:59,125
How do you make that much?
You're not even from Cluj.
954
01:19:59,208 --> 01:20:03,041
What does it matter?
It's important to stay together…
955
01:20:03,125 --> 01:20:05,500
-Shut up, you're from Ploiești.
-Dude!
956
01:20:05,583 --> 01:20:08,208
Raul is from Băicoi. Tase is Moldavian.
957
01:20:08,291 --> 01:20:11,250
Paul is from Călărași.
Erika is from the heart of Bucharest.
958
01:20:11,333 --> 01:20:14,583
-Shut the fuck up!
-Stop stirring shit up!
959
01:20:15,208 --> 01:20:16,541
-Shut up!
-Well--
960
01:20:16,625 --> 01:20:21,875
It's not okay to talk
about your colleagues like that.
961
01:20:21,958 --> 01:20:24,708
Wow! I'm doing okay with 5.000.
962
01:20:24,791 --> 01:20:29,875
What? 5.000?
I make 3.500 and do half of her work!
963
01:20:29,958 --> 01:20:32,083
-Fucking bitch!
-So what's the problem?
964
01:20:32,166 --> 01:20:36,625
-Should we tell them Oprea's number?
-Two and a half inches.
965
01:20:36,708 --> 01:20:40,875
Oh, you mean money?
Better not. They'll be scarred for life.
966
01:20:46,083 --> 01:20:48,416
-Nicoleta!
-Everyone stop!
967
01:20:48,500 --> 01:20:51,041
Stop talking about your salaries!
968
01:20:52,000 --> 01:20:57,375
Speaking of salaries, what's yours?
Mine is four--
969
01:20:59,666 --> 01:21:00,833
Holy shit!
970
01:21:00,916 --> 01:21:02,875
-What the fuck did you do, bitch?
-What?
971
01:21:06,375 --> 01:21:08,166
-Dude!
-What's your fucking problem?
972
01:21:10,875 --> 01:21:13,375
Fight!
973
01:21:18,250 --> 01:21:23,791
I'm gonna kill you and your family,
and fuck your sister.
974
01:21:26,458 --> 01:21:28,500
Guys!
975
01:21:31,041 --> 01:21:33,375
Let's not resort to violence.
976
01:21:35,041 --> 01:21:38,125
It's not politically correct to hit you,
so please carry on.
977
01:21:40,166 --> 01:21:43,041
Don't worry.
For me, it's politically correct.
978
01:21:54,708 --> 01:21:56,458
Nobody hits my bitch!
979
01:22:01,125 --> 01:22:05,708
Stop hitting your heads.
We don't have insurance for that!
980
01:22:05,791 --> 01:22:08,291
Why are you so upset?
981
01:22:08,375 --> 01:22:12,208
You can hit me with some head
anytime, if you know what I mean.
982
01:22:13,000 --> 01:22:15,083
Don't touch her!
983
01:22:25,791 --> 01:22:31,500
Mihai, now you can call yourself
a true resident of Craiova.
984
01:22:31,583 --> 01:22:33,833
Let me kiss that little dick!
985
01:22:35,875 --> 01:22:41,916
-Allow me to have the last hit.
-It will be an honor.
986
01:22:44,166 --> 01:22:47,958
Since you southerners
started moving to Cluj,
987
01:22:48,041 --> 01:22:50,500
rent has been going up constantly.
988
01:22:51,916 --> 01:22:53,416
Let him go!
989
01:22:54,750 --> 01:22:56,166
What are you doing?
990
01:22:59,625 --> 01:23:00,958
Take it easy!
991
01:23:02,375 --> 01:23:06,416
-You okay?
-I can pawn this off for 3.000!
992
01:23:11,458 --> 01:23:16,250
Feels so good!
I haven't hit anyone in ages.
993
01:23:16,333 --> 01:23:18,791
I'll hit the fudge out of you, Mr. Oprea.
994
01:23:18,875 --> 01:23:24,833
Emil! Fucking swear like a man.
You resigned!
995
01:23:25,625 --> 01:23:29,375
Fuck me! I'll suck your dick!
996
01:23:30,041 --> 01:23:32,541
Put your mother's ass on my face!
997
01:23:32,625 --> 01:23:36,208
-Too much!
-Emil! That's too much!
998
01:23:36,291 --> 01:23:37,500
Too much?
999
01:23:40,375 --> 01:23:43,875
-Is your erection back?
-How do you know?
1000
01:23:45,666 --> 01:23:50,666
-How do you know this, dickhead?
-It was obvious.
1001
01:23:51,291 --> 01:23:55,333
Twelve hours at the office.
Overtime on weekends.
1002
01:23:55,416 --> 01:23:58,000
I've been there too, Emil.
1003
01:23:58,625 --> 01:24:03,541
I'm sorry things went this way and
I didn't know how to value you better.
1004
01:24:03,625 --> 01:24:06,291
Not as an employee. As a friend.
1005
01:24:08,666 --> 01:24:11,041
-Really?
-Nope!
1006
01:24:18,916 --> 01:24:20,208
ONE YEAR LATER
1007
01:24:27,333 --> 01:24:31,625
Did I wear you out last night?
I'll wear the leash tonight.
1008
01:24:34,541 --> 01:24:37,375
A hand, maybe?
1009
01:24:45,083 --> 01:24:47,291
Yeah. Easy!
1010
01:24:50,500 --> 01:24:55,083
I'm okay, Mom!
I went to the doctor, I'm fucking fine!
1011
01:24:55,166 --> 01:24:56,333
Sorry.
1012
01:24:57,583 --> 01:25:02,708
Maria? She's fine. Shy, as usual.
1013
01:25:03,375 --> 01:25:06,041
Kisses!
1014
01:25:15,083 --> 01:25:21,833
-Boss! Or is it 'owner'?
-Owner only after I pay the installments.
1015
01:25:21,916 --> 01:25:25,000
-Hi, ma'am!
-I'm so happy you guys are here!
1016
01:25:25,750 --> 01:25:27,833
Did we forget you here last year?
1017
01:25:35,458 --> 01:25:38,375
These are Vadim and Decebal.
1018
01:25:38,458 --> 01:25:43,208
Yes! We'll schedule something
for Monday.
1019
01:25:43,291 --> 01:25:47,333
Talk later. I'm at the team building now
with my employees.
1020
01:25:49,708 --> 01:25:51,291
How is the entrepreneur's life?
1021
01:25:51,375 --> 01:25:54,208
-You tell us.
-Depends on your associates.
1022
01:25:54,291 --> 01:25:55,833
FU A.I.
1023
01:25:55,916 --> 01:25:57,625
What tattoo?
1024
01:25:58,291 --> 01:26:01,291
Should I send some guys
to 'talk' some sense into you?
1025
01:26:02,416 --> 01:26:07,708
I know where you live.
With me! Daddy loves you! Bye!
1026
01:26:08,291 --> 01:26:13,250
-Family life, you know how it is.
-Welcome to Kind Reminder.
1027
01:26:14,666 --> 01:26:17,375
Have a peaceful team building, `guys`!
1028
01:26:19,958 --> 01:26:22,208
-Good afternoon!
-Welcome!
1029
01:26:23,333 --> 01:26:24,708
Oh God!
1030
01:26:27,625 --> 01:26:29,458
Who are those?
1031
01:26:37,250 --> 01:26:39,083
The stags from Craiova.
1032
01:26:42,000 --> 01:26:47,041
To get completely fucked up is a true art!
Let's paint with our livers!
1033
01:26:51,625 --> 01:26:54,125
THE END
1034
01:26:56,875 --> 01:26:58,916
TEAMBUILDING WILL BE BACK
1035
01:30:37,250 --> 01:30:43,541
This movie was made possible with
the help of the Romanian Government.
1036
01:30:48,875 --> 01:30:51,000
Probably.
74801
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