All language subtitles for Utopia.au.S02E01.SamT (PDTV).English-WWW.MY-SUBS.CO

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$8.5 billion for roads, rail and ports...

New infrastructure of the 21st century.

.. going to benefit future generations...

There is no future plan for
Australia under this government.

.. infrastructure projects
right around the country...

.. decisions for the long term...
We want to spend the money.

.. nation-building projects...

I want to be known as the
infrastructure Prime Minister.

- This is a nation-building...
- .. nation-building...

- .. nation-building...
- .. nation-building...

Sorry! Just got your text.
Are you sure it's not working?

No, it's not. It doesn't make sense.

Hang on -- are you using your old card?

- What do you mean old?
- Didn't you get the email?

- Clearly not.
- Are you using old email?

- When did that become old?
- There's a new card on your desk.

Right, well, I can't get it
from out here... in the foyer.

- How long were you there?
- Oh, from about 6:30.

I wanted to knock a few things
on the head before the meeting.

- Shall I push the meeting back? - No!

Wow!

Looks like the fairies have been.

Came in yesterday, thought
I'd get rid of the clutter.

- Well, it wasn't all clutter.
- Oh! No, I know.

It's all there, filed alphabetically, A-Z.

Oh, that is fantastic. Oh, and
can I give you the whisper?

- Darwin. The port...
- You're not whispering.

OK. (Darwin. The port facility?)

- (Yes?) - Looks like
it might get approved.

(Really?! What a start to the year!)

Hey, Katie.

- Good to see you.
- He-llo!

- Naganook.
- Oh.

Hi!

- What's the raffle for?
- My parents live in Naganook.

- Where's that?
- Do you know Ouyen?

- No. - It's near Ouyen. In the Mallee.

I went home for Christmas, and
take a look at the town pool.

It's empty.

- We're raising money to
have it repaired. - Right.

- How much do you need?
- 50 cents.

No, how much do you need to fix the pool?

Oh, the plumber, Mr De Palma, said
$32,000 -- less if it's cash.

- Right. - So we've started
a Facebook page.

And the CWA have done
a fundraising calendar.

50 Shades Of Naganook. That's my auntie.

- In a leather mask?
- Mmm-hmm.

So you can get raffle
tickets or the calendar.

- Raffle for me.
- Ah, me too.

- I will take 50.
- Wow, thanks, Nat!

Oh, I'm gonna need a new book.

OK... Nat...

0-4...

- I'll just come back for them. - Sure.

Katie? Did you get that agenda?

- No. - I emailed it to you.

- On the old server?
- When did the server become old?

- There was an upgrade.
- Yeah, but information that might...

- There was an email.
- But I'm not getting the e...

- I need that agenda.
- Shall I put the meeting back?

No! No. New year, we get
cracking at 8:30 every time.

I've got your notes -- want
me to quickly type one out?

- Please. And then 8:30, bang. - Yep.

- Is that a Fitbit?
- Yeah.

- What's your target?
- 15,000.

Yeah, it lets me know every five.

- Tony? - Mm-hm? - 8:30.

Oh, indeed it is. 8:30. Right.
Well, welcome back, everybody.

New year, fresh start.

A few hiccups last year, but let's
not get distracted by frustrations.

It's still big dreams, sky's the limit.

- Let's go, item one.
- Annual holidays.

- That's not item one, is it? - It is.

- Well, it shouldn't be. What's
next? - The annual report.

- Are you doing this
alphabetically? - Yes, shouldn't I?

Well, no, it's just that
that's not until June.

It has to be at the printers by May,

graphic designers need
the text six weeks before,

we need proofs before that
-- so we're already behind.

- Shall I organise a photo
shoot? - I think so.

- What's a good day?
- OK, no, no, no!

It's important, but let's return to that.

In the interests of new
year, fresh start. Next?

- Charity days.
- What?

We're thinking of adding
Jeans for Genes day.

Forget about charity... I mean,
not forget about charity...

If we want to do FebFast, we
need to decide by tomorrow.

Again, later. Is this a good
time to mention indoor plants?

- No.
- It's on the agenda.

- We'll do it at the end. Next.
- Workplace health and safety.

- That's not even on the agenda.
- But remember Hugh did his knee.

He's fine now. That was months ago.

You were told to do a review and
you said put it off till next year.

- Yeah?
- It's next year.

First day and we're not... Still not?

- Nup. - This is ridiculous. Katie?

Sorry, how did we get to

a $50 billion submarine
contract last of all?

Staff indoor soccer, S-T. Submarine, S-U.

Alphabetical. Yeah, I reckon
tomorrow we'll do it first.

- We still have to do
indoor plants. - Gotcha.

Any luck? The new provider's not
recognising your old email address.

- Why don't we go back to the provider
we used to have? - The old one?

- The one that worked.
- What's your system password?

- I have no idea. - No worries, we'll
just hit 'Forgotten password'.

Here we go, security questions.
Name of first dog?

Oh... Charlie.

- Oh, I-E or E-Y? - I don't know,
we just used to yell, 'Charlie!'

Um... Didn't need a spellchecker.

- Try I-E?
- Yeah, sure.

- Ah...
- What?

- Must have been E-Y.
- Oh, well, try E-Y.

- We've been locked out
for 24 hours. - What?!

You're kidding...

5,000, Tony?

- So, you got in? - One of the
Accounts people swiped me through.

- It's definitely your new pass? - Yep.

I'll have to get it checked.
Maybe it needs to be activated.

I thought that was almonds?

I came in to knock a few things
on the head before the meeting.

- Shall I push the meeting back?
- No! 8:30 sharp. We get cracking.

- Get my agenda?
- Did you email it?

I'm locked out. I texted it.

Sorry, I've been so busy with emails.

- So you did. I'll do a new one. - Yep.

Anyway, that is the rental agreement,
the new rental agreement.

That is annual leave
authorisations from last year.

That is the staff appraisals HR wanted.

And that is my address
for the annual report.

- Wow. - Yeah, done. Let's
get on to some real work.

OK. Here's the amended BAS statement,

These purchase orders need to be signed.

Patrick wants you to go over the
motor vehicle lease agreements.

- Shall I hold onto the
others? - Maybe, yeah.

- Here he is.
- Ahh!

- Happy New Year!
- Happy New Year to you too!

Hello, hello, someone's looking trim.

Oh, I just cut back on the carbs.

- You're off to a flying start.
- Yeah, I feel good.

Alright. Can I give you a compass
setting for the new year?

- Yes, sir.
- A fresh start.

- That's what the PM's
looking for. - Really?

His words -- 'a fresh start'.

Katie, can you just pop the door?

- OK, this is strictly hush-hush.
- Right. You know me.

We are close -- I mean seriously close...

- Yes?.. - to getting all
the ducks lined up...

.. on the Darwin integrated port facility.

Marine supply base. $7 billion.

Anything fresher?

We've been working on it 12
months. It's about to get up.

- Where is it again?
- Darwin.

How's that a negative?

I guess he was looking for something
that speaks to a new year.

We're talking about the
transformation of northern Australia

into a regional hub for Asian engagement
-- they were his words too.

They sound stale. We need something fresh.

Did they not think to discuss
this before Christmas?

Ah, it's a busy time.
You know what it's like.

- What about the cabinet?
- Hopeless.

So, if anything does
come across your desk...

I'll have a think and
I'll get back to you.

- You're a good man. - Good. - Yeah.

- Is that a FitBit?
- Yeah, yeah.

- Huh. You look great. - Thanks. - Yeah.

- New year.
- Alright! Nation builders.

- How can you go cold on such
a big project? - I don't know.

- It'll still get up?
- I hope so.

- They've committed billions. - Tony?

- You told me to remind
you... - Oh, yeah.

- Raffle tickets or calendar?
- Tickets. Put me down for ten.

Thanks, Tony. It's the least we can do.

Five bucks.

- What? - They're 50 cents each.

Who sells raffle tickets for 50 cents?

- People from Naganook.
- I feel like a cheapskate.

- Where's Naganook?
- Near Ouyen.

I don't think they'll get
there with 50-cent tickets.

- Does it ever get to you? - What?

That we're splashing around billions

but a little country town
can't even fix their pool.

I try not to think about it.

- There must be something we can do.
- Well, make raffle tickets $1, for a start.

Must be someone we could speak to.

- Sorry, where's Ouyen?
- Mallee.

Oh! What about the guy we dealt
with on the Murray-Darling?

- Oh, yeah! - He was handing out
grants like they were Smarties.

- Do you remember his name? - No.

- Do you remember his department?
- No. But he knew what he was doing.

- Shouldn't be too hard
to find. - Shouldn't be.

- No.
- Annual holidays.

- No.
- Bicycle racks.

- Is this alphabetical?
- Only the office stuff.

I don't want office stuff!
Here -- Darwin Port.

- Can we come back to coffee? - No!

Sorry, Amy. Yes, later, but...
yep, plants and charities. Yep.

Now, the interim feasibility study.

Has everyone got the documents?

No...

- I emailed them yesterday.
- Old server or new server?

- Old.
- Oooh.

I didn't wanna get locked
out! We have to sort it out.

Yeah? Can I mention our health
and safety toolbox talk?

- What? - Did everyone get my email?

- Yeah. - How did she
get her documents...?

- New server.
- So, when do we do it?

Next year?

We have to hold it within
14 days of resuming work.

I actually haven't resumed work.

Tony, it's a statutory requirement.

Alright, we'll have the talk.
When were you thinking?

Well, I often like to begin

by telling an amusing story
about some people's...

Yeah, I'll take questions at the end.

Sure, I just wondered
if you had a sense --

tell the story -- how long
this might all take.

- Oh, no more than an hour. - Sure.

- That OK?
- Yeah, great.

Then, after the break, we'll get
stuck into the practical scenarios

and that'll set us up nicely for
tomorrow's risk reduction seminar.

So, what is workplace health and safety?

It's divided into five basic areas.

And if we take the first,
we've got four sub-areas.

Still on hold.

- I spoke to Dominic...
- Dominic! That's his name.

.. from Rural and Regional Development.

Those grants are pretty narrow,

so he put me onto someone
from Sports and Recreation.

Again, there's lots of grants
but we don't fit any.

The closest I could get was the
Remote Community Support Program.

- And? - Pools don't qualify
as a community facility.

Oh, you're kidding me. Flood assistance?

- In the Mallee?
- Oh, yeah.

- Has there been a bushfire recently?
- We could start one...

OK, there's gotta be something.

I'm still waiting on a call from
local government, so maybe.

- OK.
- Oh, hello?

Hello, I'm attempting to retrieve
a password for an email account.

I was speaking to someone before.

Is that 'Woodford, T' at NBN?

Yeah, that's the one.

I'll need to speak to the person who
originally authorised the account,

Jenny Sutton.

Oh, Jenny... Uh, yep, you can speak
with Jenny. She's right here.

- Here's Jenny now.
- Hello?

Who am I speaking to?

Katie.

It was an entire folder
with all the costings.

I think maybe it's been mislabelled.

'Darwin Port costings' -- it
was written across the top.

It used to sit there and
the plans used to sit there.

- Ohh!
- You got it?

Holiday leave applications
-- you need to sign them.

- I need the costings.
- Sure.

I'm really sorry about this morning.
How long were you waiting?

- The cleaner eventually
let me in. - Take my card.

- How will you get in?
- I don't come in early.

- Meanwhile, I'll get yours
sorted. - OK, great.

- Can I get you a coffee?
- Yeah... No.

- No, water's fine.
- OK. And some grapefruit?

Yep. Not as much today,
though. It's very sour.

- You got a minute?
- Yeah, sure.

- Nat?
- Yep.

- This time I'M shutting
the door. - Jim?

Alright, what are you two cooking up?

Nothing.

When the NBA starts phoning around
Canberra, word gets out.

What are you sitting on?

I smell something fresh.

Come on, just a broad outline.

I think I know -- Naganook.

It's just something Nat's
trying to get up.

- Out with it.
- There's this pool...

- Pools! Interesting.
- No, just one pool.

There's this town that
no-one's ever heard of...

I'm liking this.

And everyone there has banded together

just to try and fix this pool.

Goosebumps. So, this broken pools idea...

- It's not actually 'pools'...
- I know, it's much bigger.

- We're talking national?
- We're talking Naganook.

Near Ouyen. In the Mallee.

Sure, but once we ramp
it up, what's the scale?

- At this point, it's just the pool.
- You're being modest.

Once we roll this out across
5,000, 6,000 regional centres,

it's big, right?

- Well...
- Jim, it's...

I get it -- early days, keep
your cards close to your chest.

But blink reaction, this
ticks a lot of boxes --

obesity, kids, support for
the bush, infrastructure.

This feels fresh. This is just the
start to the new year we needed.

- Good work, team.
- Thanks.

Pools. Genius!

- Great.
- What's the problem?

I've been swiping it but
the lift's not moving.

- OK, can I look at your card?
- We've been given new ones.

I think there's an issue
with activating them.

- You have full after-hours
access? - Yeah.

- This is your card?
- Yep.

Katie?

Oh, yeah. Long story.

I'm gonna have to ask you
to step out of the lift.

- I work there. I head the
Authority. - Of course you do.

- Can I get back-up...
- There's no need to call for back-up!

- .. asap. No need to get aggressive.
- I'm not getting aggressive!

Please step all the way
outside of the lift.

- If you swipe me up...
- Keep moving.

Step away from the bicycle.

- I'm really sorry.
- It's alright. These are done.

- Just need this bank authorisation.
- I thought we did that yesterday.

But you initialled where
you should have signed.

Now initial where you signed
twice. And you need to do these.

- And the Darwin files?
- I'm still looking.

- Katie! They used to be here!
- I know, they used to be here!

- OK, we are good to go.
- Emails?

Just gotta set up a new password
-- one you can remember.

Oh, 'ABCDE'.

- Must have at least eight
characters. - '.. FGHI'.

Letters and numbers, containing
a mix of upper and lower case.

- Oh, you can't write it down.
- I'm writing it down.

- Lower-case 'e', 'e'...
- Hang on.

.. 4, upper-case 'T', 7, 8,

3, lower-case 'e', upper-case 'J'.

- Ah, that one's already taken.
- Oh, you're kidding me!

Fair dinkum, I need it
before this session.

- I can't go... Hello!
- Linda's back.

- Great!
- And here's your juice.

- Oh, great, kale again. - Yep!

So, by planning ahead and staying
aware of the hazards,

we can all help to make the
workplace a safe place.

Thank you, thank you. Thank you so much.

Well, I, uh, I think I speak
on behalf of everyone

when I say thank you to Linda,

for such an exhaustive and
informative morning -- mornings.

- So, uh, thanks to Linda.
- Oh, pleasure. Thank you.

Thank you.

Alright, then. Time for the test.

- The what?
- The test.

Let's see who's been paying attention.

Now, most people take 45 minutes.

- But YOU have an hour. - Oh.

Uppercase J, lowercase T,
uppercase V, lowercase W...

5, 6, 9, uppercase T, lowercase E.

Taken.

Just had a quiet word with Jim.

- Uh... shut the door? - Something
I might need to make a start on.

This fresh idea of yours.

- The pools program.
- Program?

Recreational grants. There's
been a pretty positive reaction.

- You haven't spoken
to anyone? - No, no, no.

Just made one discreet phone call.

- To? - To the PM's
communications department.

That's 38 people!

38 People who were champing
at the bit to get started.

- On what? - This fresh
idea. So what've you got?

- We don't really have anything.
- Oh, stop being coy.

You have a dream -- the outback,
children, community swimming pools.

Time to shape the narrative.

Come on. Lean in.

- Tony.
- Yeah?

- You failed.
- Failed?

- You had to get 20 out of 25.
- That's like an A!

- Hugh got a perfect score.
- He was the one that got injured.

- I didn't know there'd be a test.
- It was in the email.

I wasn't getting emails. I
deserve special consideration.

- You're gonna have to resit it.
- You're kidding me.

- You know what, I really need to find
those two Darwin files. - I know!

This one and that one.

I found most of the files already.

You have to keep everything
about Darwin together.

I did them alphabetically.

Great system, but group
the project together.

- Under D?
- Whatever!

- Is that a muffin?
- I was in a rush.

Do you still want your juice at 10:30?

I think I need a coffee today.

- Hey, Scotty, you know the
Darwin costings file? - Yeah?

- Do you know where it is?
- Uh, it used to be there.

Yeah. What are you doing?

- I'm gonna route your computer directly
through the modem. - Right.

- No password required. - OK.

- Tony? - Yeah? - Is it
OK if we move your bike?

- It's blocking a fire exit.
- Yeah, put it wherever you want.

- Juice at 10:30?
- Great.

It turns out that we have no grant
that applies to something like this.

Haven't you done your research?
And you said you had nothing.

So, we've got a national program

aimed at communities falling
though the cracks.

We're building regional and
recreational infrastructure.

- I love it!
- It's more about repairing.

Don't love that so much. I'm
not crazy about repairing.

- That's the idea. Fixing
a pool. - What pool?

The one we're trying to get repaired?

- Oh, we'll knock that down.
- It's a pool.

We'll fill it in then put a big
rec centre right on the top of it.

Remember, lean in, dream big.
Now, I will need a metric.

So, what are we talking?

- 30? - What are we gonna
do with $30 million?

- No -- thousand. 30,000.
- Sure, but nationwide.

Give me a headline figure.
Half a billion? A billion?

What about over five to ten years?

Well, I guess I'm just
concentrating on the one pool.

Of course you are. Good girl.
One dream at a time. Oh!

Do you like that? 'One dream at a time?'

- Found it!
- Oh, great. Both folders?

No, the test you need to resit.

- Can't I do it tomorrow?
- Uh... yes, within 24 hours.

- Do you require an interpreter? - No.

Are you of Aboriginal or Torres
Strait Islander background?

- Katie. Tomorrow? - Sure.
Do you have a disability...

Oi!

Hugh, are you OK?

- It's the same knee.
- Scotty?

- Ice pack.
- Yes, ice pack.

- Ooh, ooh... has he unplugged it?
- Yep, he's unplugged it.

Sorry, Tony.

- Hey, you alright?
- Oh, I'm fine.

- What's he doing?
- Sitting a test.

It's alright, I'll grab Nat.

Morning, Nat!

- Hi.
- Hey, good news.

COAG yesterday started off
a bit frosty in the morning,

but after morning tea, the
PM just happened to mention

this regional infrastructure fund
of yours, and they loved it.

- Really? - Big thumbs
up from the states.

- No-one's blinking at
$1 billion. - $1 billion?

Per year, initially, but after that...

One thing, though -- a few ministers
were hazy on who'll handle it.

- We're just working through
that at the moment. - Great.

Can I get a few departmental
guys down this week?

- Here? - Just to hear it from you.

- Bit of an inside briefing. - Sure.

Too easy! Big ticks for you!

Tony.

Oh, God!

- Thanks for the heads-up.
Gotta go. - Tony!

Next question.

Name the location of the
nearest fire extinguisher.

- You can't look!
- I'd look in a fire.

- There could be smoke.
- There's one in the kitchen.

Well, just outside the kitchen.
Am I getting warmer?

- Tony, I can't help.
- Alright, we'll come back to that.

What is the nearest hospital
emergency facility?

- Oh, it's the... it's
the Royal... - Not Royal.

- Saint.. - Nor saint.
- General... Memorial...?

Is it a wellness centre? Has it got
Olivia Newton-John in the title?

- Tony, I'll get into trouble.
- Alright, next question.

A plumber arrives to fix a
leaking tap in the kitchen.

- But has no ID.
- Oh, God.

Do you -- A, tell him to go away...

You've got that departmental meeting.

- Oh, Jesus.
- Can I do anything?

Can you grab those photos
Katie had of her pool?

- Sure. - And anything else she's got.

- Raffle tickets?
- No.

- Oh, and where do you want to meet?
- Can't we do it here?

Uh, don't think so.

Ah, here she is. Lovely
to finally meet you.

- Natalie, everyone.
- Hello.

Hi, everyone. Uh, you probably
didn't all need to come down.

Oh, no. We've been given our riding
instructions on this one from you-know-who.

- Who?
- The Prime Minister.

Can I just say that my colleagues
in the Health Department

are enormously excited by this.

That's very nice.

- Their apologies for being unable
to attend today. - Unable...

Now, without wanting to steal the thunder

from Aged Care and Social Services here,

- but I think I can see some smiles.
- Hard to hide them.

When Education and Finance see eye-to-eye,

we know we're looking at a good thing.

Right!

Now, I'm going to bring in Sport,
Small Business, Indigenous Affairs,

but before I do that,

we'd love to get your
big-picture take on RHAFI.

- RHAFI? - Rural Health
and Fitness Initiative.

- Oh, right! RHAFI.
- One dream at a time.

Absolutely.

We've had the broad overview,
and look -- exciting stuff.

But naturally, we'd love you
to really add some detail

to really fill out the picture.

Sure.

Tony! Chocolate?

It's got raisins in it.

Anyway, bad news.

17 out of 30. It's better than yesterday.

You let the plumber in without proper ID.

If he can find a working swipe
card, he deserves to get in!

You had to get 20 or above.

- I have to get those two files.
- Ooh, I found them!

- Thank God. - Can you
pop them on my desk?

- I can't.
- Why not?

- The white ones.
- Oh, you're kidding me.

- What are you gonna do?
- Get the stupid thing.

- They're heavy, Tony!
- I can get it.

Oh, another 5,000!

- I need a ladder.
- We don't have them anymore.

Get one!

We not allowed to because
of the safety review.

- Just get a few chairs!
- See, that's why you failed the test.

I don't care how you do it. I don't
care who goes to hospital to get them.

I want those boxes, whatever it takes!

Alright, let's really drill down on this.

I was wondering whether I should
start with a practical example.

- Wonderful idea.
- Great.

Hugh, do you have the photos from Katie?

- Yes.
- Great.

Let me tell you about a beautiful
little town called Naganook.

It's the height of summer

and the good people of Naganook
are all dreaming of one thing.

- Hugh?
- Sorry. Sorry.

Sorry again.

Oh! Sorry, don't know what that was.

- We're good.
- I need that one too.

- That one as well?
- Yeah.

Ooh, shit!

To actually have the name
of the plumber involved.

Incredible.

We don't see that level
of detail very often.

No, we don't. Natalie,
you have set the tone.

Now I think it's up to
all of us to do our bit.

Hear, hear.

So, if there is anything
else that you need...

- Shall I get the raffle tickets?
- Not now. - .. call my office.

- Shall I throw out your grapefruit?
- Yeah, we'll start again next week.

- Where's your Fitbit?
- 'Cause I'm not riding in anymore...

- What's in the bag? A muffin?!
- It's gluten-free.

- Hey, where's Hugh?
- At the physio.

- And where was Amy?
- She burnt her hand!

- Oh, how?
- Laminating safety signs.

- Where's Scotty?
- Getting your bike fixed.

- Oh.
- G'day, here we go!

- Hot off the press.
- Oh!

RHAFI!

For the young and not-so-young

across the sweeping plains
of this great land.

Because no matter where you live,

keeping active makes
good sense for us all.

The Rural Health and Fitness Initiative,

ensuring all Australians reach their peak,

one dream at a time.

Well, what do you reckon?

- Wow. - That's what everyone says!

Hey, wait till you see the online version.

- So, it's... it's going
ahead? - Full steam!

PM wants to take you both to dinner.

- You still paleo?
- Sort of.

Can I just ask -- there's a lot here
about building new facilities.

What about, like, maintenance?

Yeah, I'm not sure that's our main focus.

- So, say, fixing swimming pools...?
- Yeah, it won't start there.

- We did start there.
- Yeah, but look at it now!

- And the roll-out's still
nationwide? - Yeah!

- Great, so...
- Starting in WA.

Bit of a pilot program
-- keep the natives happy.

And then?

And then, if all goes well,
Queensland, maybe NSW,

couple of electorates down in Tassie...

- And Victoria?
- Again, wouldn't start there.

Anyway, well done to you both. This
year is off to a flying start.

- You can keep that.
- Thanks.

This feels fresh.

Katie!

How many raffle tickets you still got?

Oh, heaps.

- We'll take 'em all.
- Wow!

- I'll get my purse.
- And a calendar!

Two.

Three.

Just a few more security questions.

- OK. - Name of favourite teacher.

- Oh... can I have a clue?
- Begins with M.

Oh! Mr McIntyre.

- Is that 'Mc' or 'Mac'? - Mac?

I'm sorry, sir, that's incorrect.
I can't help you anymore.

Hang on, I've got the other t...

Here he is! Just wanted to say well done.

Oh, thanks, yeah. What's that?

- Oh, turns out I won
Katie's raffle! - Oh.

Have you put on weight?

- That one's really heavy.
- Hang on a sec.

Careful!

Hang on. Here we go, all good.

Scott!