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Come on, honey,
4
00:00:29,246 --> 00:00:31,031
give Daddy the blanket.
5
00:00:31,814 --> 00:00:33,685
Listen, this is gonna be
6
00:00:33,772 --> 00:00:35,818
a real fun party with lots of
cake and ice cream,
7
00:00:35,905 --> 00:00:38,386
but little girls with
wet blankets can't go.
8
00:00:38,821 --> 00:00:40,301
Now give it to Daddy.
9
00:00:43,695 --> 00:00:45,436
Do this-- leave
the blanket here,
10
00:00:45,523 --> 00:00:46,742
I'll advance you all
of your allowance
11
00:00:46,829 --> 00:00:48,396
till you're 40.
Fair enough?
12
00:00:51,486 --> 00:00:54,141
There is no way that
that blanket is going
in this car.
13
00:00:54,228 --> 00:00:55,229
Mom!
14
00:00:55,316 --> 00:00:56,795
No, no, no. Not this time.
15
00:00:56,882 --> 00:01:00,582
This is a brand new
$25,000 BMW 325 e.5
16
00:01:00,669 --> 00:01:01,583
with leather interior.
17
00:01:01,670 --> 00:01:03,541
Tom, it's just a car.
18
00:01:03,628 --> 00:01:06,414
Oh, come on, I just
Armor-alled the seats.
19
00:01:12,550 --> 00:01:14,335
[indistinct chatter
in Chinese]
20
00:01:18,600 --> 00:01:20,210
Got any 8s?
21
00:01:21,429 --> 00:01:23,213
Go fish.
22
00:01:23,300 --> 00:01:24,867
Why does it always
take her so long?
23
00:01:24,954 --> 00:01:29,045
Just think of her
as a work in progress.
24
00:01:29,611 --> 00:01:30,699
Ah!
25
00:01:30,786 --> 00:01:32,657
Do I look
all right?
26
00:01:32,744 --> 00:01:34,311
Do stars twinkle?
27
00:01:34,398 --> 00:01:35,878
Come on, sweetheart,
your bike awaits.
28
00:01:35,965 --> 00:01:37,314
Have you ever tried
putting pantyhose on
29
00:01:37,401 --> 00:01:38,794
-With wet nails?
-It's a bitch.
30
00:01:38,881 --> 00:01:40,622
I forgot
my sample case.
31
00:01:40,709 --> 00:01:42,580
Oh, come on, Tish,
we're gonna be late.
32
00:01:42,667 --> 00:01:44,321
We are late.
33
00:01:45,801 --> 00:01:47,411
[woman]
Be careful.
34
00:01:47,498 --> 00:01:49,283
[aggressive honking]
35
00:01:49,370 --> 00:01:50,762
Tom.
36
00:01:50,849 --> 00:01:52,242
Get out of the road, you...!
37
00:01:56,290 --> 00:01:58,161
Be careful, Tom!
38
00:02:01,599 --> 00:02:03,210
Yay!
39
00:02:04,820 --> 00:02:08,215
[church bell rings]
40
00:02:08,302 --> 00:02:10,260
Come on.
Come on.
41
00:02:11,696 --> 00:02:14,090
[joyful screams]
42
00:02:14,917 --> 00:02:16,745
Congratulations,
Mama.
43
00:02:16,832 --> 00:02:19,617
Oh, wasn't it
a beautiful sermon?
44
00:02:19,704 --> 00:02:20,749
Beautiful.
45
00:02:20,836 --> 00:02:21,750
Beautiful.
46
00:02:21,837 --> 00:02:23,360
Oh, no!
47
00:02:23,447 --> 00:02:25,580
It means fertility,
God forbid...
48
00:02:35,938 --> 00:02:38,245
♪ Ba ba ba ba ba
bamba ♪
49
00:02:39,420 --> 00:02:41,248
♪ Ba ba ba ba ba
bamba ♪
50
00:02:41,335 --> 00:02:44,381
♪ This great song with
This wonderful rhythm ♪
51
00:02:45,426 --> 00:02:48,777
♪ It's a wonderful rhythm,
And you can feel it ♪
52
00:02:48,864 --> 00:02:50,431
♪ You know what
I'm saying ♪
53
00:02:50,518 --> 00:02:53,390
♪ Yes, you know
What I'm saying ♪
54
00:02:53,477 --> 00:02:54,870
♪ Come on and dance ♪
55
00:02:55,436 --> 00:02:57,612
♪ Come on and dance,
Come on and dance ♪
56
00:02:57,699 --> 00:02:59,614
♪ When the stars
Meet the heavens ♪
57
00:03:00,441 --> 00:03:02,356
♪ When the stars
Meet the heavens ♪
58
00:03:02,443 --> 00:03:04,314
♪ The sky will shine ♪
59
00:03:04,401 --> 00:03:07,274
♪ And all night long,
The sky will shine... ♪
60
00:03:09,493 --> 00:03:10,538
Bad tits.
61
00:03:14,411 --> 00:03:15,412
No ass.
62
00:03:15,499 --> 00:03:16,457
Yeah.
63
00:03:16,544 --> 00:03:17,806
So, Tom,
64
00:03:17,893 --> 00:03:19,416
you still selling
Subarus?
65
00:03:19,503 --> 00:03:20,809
How many times I gotta
tell you, Kirby?
66
00:03:20,896 --> 00:03:22,463
I sell BMWs.
67
00:03:22,941 --> 00:03:24,726
I just happen to work out
of a Subaru showroom.
68
00:03:24,813 --> 00:03:26,336
Ohh.
69
00:03:29,513 --> 00:03:30,601
Look at her.
70
00:03:30,906 --> 00:03:32,516
What a pig.
71
00:03:32,603 --> 00:03:34,562
Here we are,
safe and sound.
72
00:03:37,565 --> 00:03:40,307
-Aah!
-I know, I know,
we gotta get a car.
73
00:03:40,394 --> 00:03:41,656
It's on my list.
74
00:03:42,134 --> 00:03:44,441
I dried my hair
in front of the TV,
75
00:03:44,528 --> 00:03:46,400
and it's full
of electricity.
76
00:03:47,052 --> 00:03:49,838
-Mitch, please, stop.
-Mitch, don't do that. C'mon.
77
00:03:49,925 --> 00:03:52,449
Wait. Your cousins,
Toby and Mary,
78
00:03:52,536 --> 00:03:53,885
do they have
a boy or a girl?
79
00:03:53,972 --> 00:03:55,496
Uh, one or the other.
80
00:03:57,628 --> 00:03:59,630
Go! Go! Go! Go!
81
00:03:59,717 --> 00:04:02,198
Mama! Mama, go!
82
00:04:06,681 --> 00:04:09,249
[laughs]
83
00:04:10,946 --> 00:04:13,340
[cheers]
84
00:04:24,612 --> 00:04:26,875
[announcer]
Congratulations
to the bride and groom.
85
00:04:26,962 --> 00:04:28,920
Many happy years
together.
86
00:04:29,007 --> 00:04:30,879
Jesus, who is that?
87
00:04:30,966 --> 00:04:33,621
[announcer]
Now we'd like to do
a composition of our own.
88
00:04:34,448 --> 00:04:37,755
Eh, you take away
the clothes and the make-up,
89
00:04:37,842 --> 00:04:39,409
what do you got?
90
00:04:39,496 --> 00:04:40,932
A gorgeous
naked woman.
91
00:04:41,019 --> 00:04:42,978
-Ah!
-Larry!
92
00:04:43,065 --> 00:04:45,763
Oh, congratulations,
Uncle Phil.
93
00:04:45,850 --> 00:04:47,852
Isn't she
something, huh?
94
00:04:47,939 --> 00:04:50,507
Edie, if you're as half as
wonderful as my uncle says,
95
00:04:50,594 --> 00:04:51,726
I want you to leave him
right now.
96
00:04:51,813 --> 00:04:52,901
I'm going to marry you.
97
00:04:52,988 --> 00:04:54,642
Oh!
98
00:04:54,729 --> 00:04:56,687
This is Larry's
beautiful wife, Trish.
99
00:04:56,774 --> 00:04:58,080
Congratulations.
100
00:04:58,167 --> 00:05:00,909
And this monster
here is Mitchie.
101
00:05:00,996 --> 00:05:02,824
Hey, easy on the mousse,
Uncle Phil.
102
00:05:02,911 --> 00:05:04,608
Hi, Mitch.
103
00:05:04,695 --> 00:05:06,654
This is for you.
104
00:05:06,741 --> 00:05:08,786
When are you coming
to work for me,
you son of a gun?
105
00:05:08,873 --> 00:05:11,833
Oh, I told you, Uncle Phil,
I just don't see an
intellectual,
106
00:05:11,920 --> 00:05:13,791
albeit, muscular guy
like myself
107
00:05:13,878 --> 00:05:15,837
working in a junkyard.
108
00:05:15,924 --> 00:05:18,927
Believe me. There's
a future in garbage.
109
00:05:19,014 --> 00:05:20,537
By the year 2000,
there's gonna be
110
00:05:20,624 --> 00:05:21,886
no place left
for human refuse.
111
00:05:21,973 --> 00:05:23,714
No place left
for human refuse.
112
00:05:23,801 --> 00:05:26,369
Get in while
the market's still open.
113
00:05:27,196 --> 00:05:29,633
Don't say nothing.
Don't say nothing. Sleep on it.
114
00:05:30,591 --> 00:05:32,897
-We'll talk, ok?
-It's on my list, Uncle Phil.
115
00:05:32,984 --> 00:05:34,638
-Your list?
-No, it's on my list.
116
00:05:34,725 --> 00:05:36,379
I got your list.
117
00:05:40,731 --> 00:05:44,474
I would like to make--
attention, please.
Attention!
118
00:05:44,561 --> 00:05:45,910
I want to make a toast
119
00:05:45,997 --> 00:05:47,999
to this lovely
young couple.
120
00:05:48,086 --> 00:05:51,089
For most of us,
121
00:05:51,176 --> 00:05:52,830
to find love
once in a lifetime,
122
00:05:52,917 --> 00:05:54,832
we're lucky.
123
00:05:54,919 --> 00:05:56,268
But for these two
124
00:05:56,356 --> 00:05:58,793
to find love again
later in life...
125
00:06:00,838 --> 00:06:02,623
So, Edie,
126
00:06:02,710 --> 00:06:06,017
On behalf of my whole family,
we are grateful,
127
00:06:06,104 --> 00:06:07,802
because my Uncle Phil,
128
00:06:07,889 --> 00:06:10,979
while being one of the
great men in garbage,
129
00:06:11,066 --> 00:06:13,895
has not always been so keen
on personal hygiene.
130
00:06:13,982 --> 00:06:15,636
That is, until he met you.
131
00:06:17,942 --> 00:06:19,683
So...
132
00:06:19,770 --> 00:06:21,946
I will now,
ahem, disrobe
133
00:06:22,033 --> 00:06:24,732
And play a Celtic
classic ballad
134
00:06:24,819 --> 00:06:26,995
on my love flute.
135
00:06:27,082 --> 00:06:28,649
[Uncle Phil]
Shut up!
136
00:06:36,047 --> 00:06:38,746
My nephew Larry's
making a toast.
137
00:06:41,705 --> 00:06:43,272
Oh.
138
00:06:43,359 --> 00:06:45,927
Uh, thank you,
Uncle Phil.
139
00:06:46,014 --> 00:06:47,711
Even the band stopped.
140
00:06:47,798 --> 00:06:48,930
Um...
141
00:06:49,017 --> 00:06:50,366
Well, I was uh...
142
00:06:50,453 --> 00:06:52,455
Excuse me here.
I was, just, uh...
143
00:06:53,021 --> 00:06:56,894
Trying to, uh, make
a toast here, um...
144
00:06:56,981 --> 00:07:00,942
What I guess what I was trying
to say was this is, uh...
145
00:07:01,029 --> 00:07:02,683
This occasion's more
than a--than a wedding.
146
00:07:02,770 --> 00:07:05,686
It's a, uh...
Well, it's a love story.
147
00:07:05,773 --> 00:07:06,948
It's...
148
00:07:07,035 --> 00:07:08,558
I'm dying here.
149
00:07:08,645 --> 00:07:11,474
It's the, uh, the story...
150
00:07:12,519 --> 00:07:14,912
♪ It's the story
Of a lovely lady ♪
151
00:07:14,999 --> 00:07:19,003
♪ Who was living, had
Three lovely girl sisters ♪
152
00:07:19,090 --> 00:07:23,486
♪ Each of them had hair
Like their mother ♪
153
00:07:24,182 --> 00:07:27,534
What's the real color
of her hair anyway?
154
00:07:27,969 --> 00:07:29,536
What year?
155
00:07:34,062 --> 00:07:36,804
♪ It's the story
Of Phil Kozinski ♪
156
00:07:37,761 --> 00:07:40,677
♪ Who was living in
A garbage dump alone ♪
157
00:07:42,853 --> 00:07:44,551
Anyway. Anyway.
158
00:07:44,986 --> 00:07:46,596
Anyway, to life...
159
00:07:46,683 --> 00:07:47,989
To love...
160
00:07:48,076 --> 00:07:49,817
To Phil and Edie.
161
00:08:01,785 --> 00:08:02,917
Larry...
162
00:08:03,961 --> 00:08:04,962
I'm touched.
163
00:08:05,049 --> 00:08:06,703
[belches]
164
00:08:09,053 --> 00:08:11,186
Such a wonderful nephew.
165
00:08:11,273 --> 00:08:12,970
Such a wonderful bride.
166
00:08:13,057 --> 00:08:14,624
I don't deserve her.
167
00:08:14,711 --> 00:08:16,321
You're right,
you bastard!
168
00:08:16,408 --> 00:08:17,845
Hey, you don't like it?
169
00:08:17,932 --> 00:08:19,934
Kiss me where
the sun don't shine!
170
00:08:20,021 --> 00:08:22,023
Oh, yeah?
Where is that?
171
00:08:22,110 --> 00:08:23,894
I'll show you where.
172
00:08:23,981 --> 00:08:24,982
Wait.
173
00:08:25,069 --> 00:08:28,725
[drum roll]
174
00:08:28,812 --> 00:08:30,988
[band plays
strip tease music]
175
00:08:31,075 --> 00:08:33,861
[crowd cheers]
176
00:08:39,693 --> 00:08:41,477
It's all mine!
177
00:08:45,220 --> 00:08:46,830
Marone a mi,
178
00:08:46,917 --> 00:08:48,179
my brother Angelo
179
00:08:48,266 --> 00:08:50,007
just rolled over
in his grave.
180
00:08:50,094 --> 00:08:51,922
You're crazy!
181
00:08:52,009 --> 00:08:53,924
Crazy with love!
182
00:08:54,403 --> 00:08:56,100
♪ You put your right leg in ♪
183
00:08:56,187 --> 00:08:58,102
♪ You put your right leg out ♪
184
00:08:58,189 --> 00:08:59,756
♪ You put your right leg in ♪
185
00:08:59,843 --> 00:09:01,236
♪ And you shake it
All about ♪
186
00:09:01,323 --> 00:09:02,890
♪ You do the hokey pokey ♪
187
00:09:02,977 --> 00:09:04,456
♪ And you turn
Yourself around ♪
188
00:09:04,544 --> 00:09:06,894
♪ That's what it's all about ♪
189
00:09:11,899 --> 00:09:14,728
Now all of these products
are natural,
190
00:09:14,815 --> 00:09:16,164
and they're coordinated
191
00:09:16,251 --> 00:09:17,992
to go with your
individual coloring.
192
00:09:18,645 --> 00:09:22,953
You're a "fall"--
soft ambers and magenta.
193
00:09:23,040 --> 00:09:26,566
And you're a "summer"--
yellows... blues.
194
00:09:27,784 --> 00:09:30,395
And you, you're a "spring."
195
00:09:30,482 --> 00:09:31,875
You should be in pink.
196
00:09:31,962 --> 00:09:34,399
Darling, I'm a widow
for 30 years,
197
00:09:34,486 --> 00:09:36,097
and I only wear black.
198
00:09:36,184 --> 00:09:38,795
And on you, it works.
199
00:09:38,882 --> 00:09:40,710
Classic.
200
00:09:40,797 --> 00:09:42,277
♪ Turn yourself around ♪
201
00:09:42,364 --> 00:09:44,235
♪ That's what
It's all about ♪
202
00:09:44,322 --> 00:09:47,064
Look at them.
Look at her.
203
00:09:47,151 --> 00:09:49,850
She buried my brother
only five years ago.
204
00:09:49,937 --> 00:09:53,462
-Look at her.
She killed him.
-What?
205
00:09:53,549 --> 00:09:54,811
She killed him with butter,
206
00:09:55,203 --> 00:09:56,726
putting butter in his food
all the time.
207
00:09:59,033 --> 00:10:00,251
Listen to me, Kevin,
I'm telling you,
208
00:10:01,470 --> 00:10:02,819
-I've got a problem with this!
-All right, you told me
we had a problem.
209
00:10:02,906 --> 00:10:04,342
-Now's not the time.
-You canceled the check.
210
00:10:05,387 --> 00:10:06,867
-You didn't fix the car!
-What, what? It's my fault
that it broke down?
211
00:10:06,954 --> 00:10:08,738
Tom, it broke down
on the way home!
212
00:10:08,825 --> 00:10:09,913
Hey! You owe me money!
213
00:10:10,000 --> 00:10:11,436
You owe me a car!
214
00:10:11,523 --> 00:10:13,003
-You're a goddam liar.
-You're a cheat!
215
00:10:13,090 --> 00:10:14,265
Shithead! Come on!
216
00:10:14,352 --> 00:10:15,963
Take it easy.
217
00:10:16,050 --> 00:10:17,268
Come on!
218
00:10:17,355 --> 00:10:18,966
Just relax. Relax!
219
00:10:19,967 --> 00:10:21,142
Take it easy.
220
00:10:21,229 --> 00:10:22,143
Your cousin's
an asshole.
221
00:10:22,230 --> 00:10:23,231
Hey! Just take it easy.
222
00:10:23,318 --> 00:10:24,798
Get some help, Tom.
223
00:10:28,236 --> 00:10:30,760
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
224
00:10:35,460 --> 00:10:38,768
Up close, she doesn't
look so young.
225
00:10:47,168 --> 00:10:50,693
[band plays the theme
from The Godfather]
226
00:11:00,529 --> 00:11:04,098
Wait, you're actually telling
me that your parents let you
come here today?
227
00:11:04,185 --> 00:11:07,231
And they never warned you
about the wedding killer?
228
00:11:07,318 --> 00:11:08,929
[kids] No.
229
00:11:09,016 --> 00:11:11,888
Okay. You see,
there's this guy, um...
230
00:11:11,975 --> 00:11:13,977
Fred, I think
his name is--
231
00:11:14,064 --> 00:11:18,112
And his girlfriend
walked out on him, okay?
232
00:11:18,199 --> 00:11:20,984
And on the day of her wedding
to this other guy,
233
00:11:21,071 --> 00:11:22,682
Fred showed up,
234
00:11:23,465 --> 00:11:24,901
and he had a machete.
235
00:11:24,988 --> 00:11:27,034
And he chopped her head off.
236
00:11:27,121 --> 00:11:29,732
-[kids] Eww!
-There was blood everywhere,
237
00:11:29,819 --> 00:11:33,388
and then he sliced
the groom's guts open,
right down the middle,
238
00:11:33,475 --> 00:11:35,433
and this stuff spilled out
239
00:11:35,520 --> 00:11:37,087
that looked like,
uh...spaghetti.
240
00:11:37,174 --> 00:11:39,089
Ew!
Gross!
241
00:11:39,176 --> 00:11:40,351
And then he ripped
her heart out
242
00:11:40,438 --> 00:11:42,179
while it was still beating,
243
00:11:42,266 --> 00:11:43,833
and he ate it!
244
00:11:43,920 --> 00:11:45,095
[kids] Ew!
245
00:11:45,182 --> 00:11:46,662
Wait, wait, wait.
246
00:11:46,749 --> 00:11:49,273
And now he goes
from wedding to wedding
247
00:11:49,360 --> 00:11:52,189
macheteing up everybody
into little pieces.
248
00:11:52,276 --> 00:11:54,278
Kids, too?
249
00:11:54,365 --> 00:11:56,063
Especiallykids.
250
00:11:56,454 --> 00:11:57,978
It's time to go, kids.
251
00:12:02,460 --> 00:12:05,202
That was sweet of you
to tell them stories,
Mitch.
252
00:12:05,289 --> 00:12:06,856
There's nothing to it.
253
00:12:08,249 --> 00:12:10,077
Aah! Aah!
254
00:12:10,164 --> 00:12:11,731
Oh.
255
00:12:13,123 --> 00:12:14,385
Come on, children.
256
00:12:14,472 --> 00:12:16,692
Children, outside.
257
00:12:23,177 --> 00:12:25,005
Bye-bye.
258
00:12:28,225 --> 00:12:29,183
Bye-bye.
259
00:12:29,270 --> 00:12:30,837
Send a card!
260
00:12:33,448 --> 00:12:35,189
Okay, I'll call you.
261
00:12:38,148 --> 00:12:39,889
Dad, I can't find her
anywhere.
262
00:12:39,976 --> 00:12:41,717
And I got plans tonight.
263
00:12:43,153 --> 00:12:44,589
-Uh, Harry?
-Yeah?
264
00:12:44,676 --> 00:12:46,243
Hey, can you give
my kid a lift home?
265
00:12:46,330 --> 00:12:47,941
Come along, Mitch.
266
00:12:48,028 --> 00:12:50,160
Great. Hey, as dads go,
you're okay.
267
00:12:50,247 --> 00:12:51,945
Home by 10:00.
268
00:12:53,511 --> 00:12:55,731
Mitch, home by 10:00.
269
00:12:57,254 --> 00:12:58,734
[woman]
Bye.
270
00:12:59,169 --> 00:13:00,127
Goodbye.
271
00:13:05,349 --> 00:13:07,395
She's going
to come back soon
272
00:13:07,482 --> 00:13:08,875
from her honeymoon.
273
00:13:17,448 --> 00:13:19,363
-Hi.
-Hi.
274
00:13:19,450 --> 00:13:21,888
I seem to have
lost my mate.
275
00:13:21,975 --> 00:13:23,193
Me, too.
276
00:13:23,280 --> 00:13:24,934
I'm sure I came in
with one.
277
00:13:26,588 --> 00:13:28,938
-Nice wedding.
-Mm-hmm.
278
00:13:32,246 --> 00:13:33,508
I'm Phil's nephew.
279
00:13:33,595 --> 00:13:35,031
I know,
I'm Edie's, um--
280
00:13:35,118 --> 00:13:36,032
I know.
281
00:13:36,119 --> 00:13:37,120
Larry.
282
00:13:37,207 --> 00:13:38,948
I'm Maria. Chloe.
283
00:13:39,035 --> 00:13:40,515
-Hi, Chloe.
-Hi.
284
00:13:40,602 --> 00:13:42,038
-Are you cold,
sweetheart?
-Yeah.
285
00:13:42,125 --> 00:13:44,388
Well, why don't
we go inside?
286
00:13:44,475 --> 00:13:46,173
Yes. That's
a good idea.
287
00:13:53,397 --> 00:13:55,008
[singing]
288
00:13:55,095 --> 00:13:57,445
Ha ha ha!
You should be a singer.
289
00:13:57,532 --> 00:13:58,446
Oh, thanks.
290
00:13:58,533 --> 00:13:59,969
I'll try.
291
00:14:00,056 --> 00:14:01,536
Your wife
is very beautiful.
292
00:14:01,623 --> 00:14:03,494
Have you been
married long?
293
00:14:03,581 --> 00:14:05,279
Couple of years. You?
294
00:14:05,366 --> 00:14:06,367
Almost 11.
295
00:14:06,454 --> 00:14:07,977
Ooh.
296
00:14:09,065 --> 00:14:10,850
We were married young.
297
00:14:12,068 --> 00:14:12,939
Work?
298
00:14:13,026 --> 00:14:14,157
Yes. He sells cars.
299
00:14:14,244 --> 00:14:15,942
Subarus.
300
00:14:16,029 --> 00:14:18,074
No, do you work?
301
00:14:18,640 --> 00:14:21,295
Me? Yes.
I'm a legal secretary.
302
00:14:22,296 --> 00:14:23,340
Ahh.
303
00:14:23,427 --> 00:14:24,951
[Maria] And you?
304
00:14:25,038 --> 00:14:27,127
I teach ballroom dancing.
305
00:14:28,041 --> 00:14:29,303
-Really?
-Mm-hmm.
306
00:14:29,912 --> 00:14:31,392
Would you have been
more impressed
307
00:14:31,479 --> 00:14:33,176
if I said I was
a securities analyst?
308
00:14:33,263 --> 00:14:35,265
Because
my first wife was.
309
00:14:35,352 --> 00:14:37,485
My father, however,
was more impressed
310
00:14:37,572 --> 00:14:40,096
when I was
a real estate broker.
311
00:14:40,488 --> 00:14:43,230
My first wife's friends
liked that, too.
312
00:14:43,317 --> 00:14:45,406
Everybody was
impressed but me.
313
00:14:45,493 --> 00:14:47,974
And you play
the piano, too.
314
00:14:48,061 --> 00:14:49,236
No.
315
00:14:51,281 --> 00:14:52,543
Trumpet.
316
00:14:52,630 --> 00:14:54,937
Are you really
a dance teacher?
317
00:14:59,115 --> 00:15:00,595
Here you go. This...
318
00:15:01,074 --> 00:15:04,512
entitles you
to one free lesson.
319
00:15:04,860 --> 00:15:07,167
I'm not a very
good dancer.
320
00:15:07,254 --> 00:15:08,385
That's okay.
321
00:15:08,472 --> 00:15:10,039
I'm not a very
good teacher.
322
00:15:13,695 --> 00:15:16,393
Well, I bet I know somebody
who would like to dance.
323
00:15:16,480 --> 00:15:18,352
[laughs]
324
00:15:18,439 --> 00:15:19,570
[giggles]
325
00:15:19,657 --> 00:15:21,877
Oh, you're so light.
326
00:15:28,144 --> 00:15:29,537
You're very good
with children.
327
00:15:29,624 --> 00:15:32,105
Well, my job gives me
a lot of time
328
00:15:32,192 --> 00:15:34,063
to spend
with my son.
329
00:15:36,413 --> 00:15:38,241
-The one with
the video camera?
-Uh-huh.
330
00:15:41,331 --> 00:15:43,290
You know, my mother
and Phil...
331
00:15:43,638 --> 00:15:45,292
They're so sweet.
332
00:15:47,207 --> 00:15:49,557
I felt like crying,
but I couldn't.
333
00:15:49,644 --> 00:15:51,385
I never can.
334
00:15:53,256 --> 00:15:55,215
Why am I telling you this?
335
00:15:55,563 --> 00:15:57,652
People tell
dance teachers things.
336
00:15:57,739 --> 00:15:59,610
Thank you, madam. Lovely.
337
00:16:00,263 --> 00:16:02,570
Nobody told me anything
when I was in securities.
338
00:16:02,657 --> 00:16:04,180
Whoo!
339
00:16:04,267 --> 00:16:05,790
How many jobs
did you have?
340
00:16:05,877 --> 00:16:07,705
Oh, I don't know. A lot.
341
00:16:07,792 --> 00:16:10,360
I change every
two or three years.
342
00:16:10,447 --> 00:16:11,579
If it looks like
I might be successful,
343
00:16:11,666 --> 00:16:13,407
I move on.
344
00:16:13,494 --> 00:16:14,625
[Maria]
You don't want to be
successful?
345
00:16:14,712 --> 00:16:16,932
I want to be happy.
346
00:16:18,368 --> 00:16:19,717
We're getting personal here.
347
00:16:19,804 --> 00:16:21,328
You're learning
all of my secrets.
348
00:16:21,415 --> 00:16:23,330
And I don't know
the first thing about you.
349
00:16:23,939 --> 00:16:26,289
I'm not an interesting person.
350
00:16:27,029 --> 00:16:29,379
Christ, you--
how you doing?
351
00:16:29,466 --> 00:16:31,512
You will not believe
what happened to us.
352
00:16:31,599 --> 00:16:33,296
The God damn car broke down.
353
00:16:33,383 --> 00:16:35,037
Where is everybody?
354
00:16:35,907 --> 00:16:38,258
Oh, Jesus, I didn't know
it was this late. Are you okay?
355
00:16:38,345 --> 00:16:40,564
Oh, Tom was just
giving me a test drive.
356
00:16:41,130 --> 00:16:43,089
In his car. He--
we lost track of time.
357
00:16:43,176 --> 00:16:44,394
Tom sells BMWs.
358
00:16:45,178 --> 00:16:47,267
I thought
they were Subarus.
359
00:16:47,354 --> 00:16:49,617
I understand you're in
the market for a new car.
360
00:16:49,704 --> 00:16:51,706
We are, aren't we, honey?
361
00:16:51,793 --> 00:16:54,404
Your wife and I have been
talking about a set of wheels
362
00:16:54,491 --> 00:16:56,232
under you at a price
you can afford.
363
00:16:56,319 --> 00:16:57,755
Not just any set of wheels.
364
00:16:57,842 --> 00:17:00,193
We're talking about
the Bavarian Motor Works.
365
00:17:01,020 --> 00:17:03,457
I think a BMW is
a little out of our range.
366
00:17:03,544 --> 00:17:05,067
Mmm.
367
00:17:05,850 --> 00:17:08,070
Besides, they're
breaking down all the time.
368
00:17:08,723 --> 00:17:10,464
[laughs]
369
00:17:10,768 --> 00:17:12,988
[all laugh]
370
00:17:16,774 --> 00:17:19,429
So anyway, as soon as she said
371
00:17:19,516 --> 00:17:21,344
they were thinking
about buying a car,
372
00:17:21,431 --> 00:17:23,390
I knew if I could
get her behind the wheel--
373
00:17:23,477 --> 00:17:27,394
Bingo-- sale, commission,
full sticker price.
374
00:17:27,829 --> 00:17:30,092
Then the car breaks down.
375
00:17:30,179 --> 00:17:32,616
See that's the thing in sales,
you have to concentrate
on the woman.
376
00:17:32,703 --> 00:17:34,401
Women always
liked you, Tom.
377
00:17:37,273 --> 00:17:38,883
You believe me,
don't you?
378
00:17:38,970 --> 00:17:40,407
Why shouldn't I?
379
00:17:40,494 --> 00:17:42,322
You're my husband.
380
00:17:44,585 --> 00:17:47,196
[trumpet plays]
381
00:17:50,721 --> 00:17:52,593
Phil's worth
a lot of money.
382
00:17:53,289 --> 00:17:55,465
You really should
take him up on his offer.
383
00:17:55,552 --> 00:17:57,424
You're great at
collecting junk.
384
00:17:58,120 --> 00:18:00,470
You'd wind up
running the company.
385
00:18:04,648 --> 00:18:06,694
My psychic Mrs. Wong
386
00:18:06,781 --> 00:18:08,522
is encouraging me
to express myself.
387
00:18:08,609 --> 00:18:11,612
She says a lot of attractive
women get depressed
388
00:18:11,699 --> 00:18:13,483
because they think
people see nothing
389
00:18:13,570 --> 00:18:15,181
but their looks.
390
00:18:21,709 --> 00:18:23,580
She thinks
I have sensitivity
391
00:18:23,667 --> 00:18:25,408
and talent, Larry.
392
00:18:25,495 --> 00:18:27,410
She says that.
393
00:18:27,889 --> 00:18:29,369
Mrs. Wong's right.
394
00:18:32,415 --> 00:18:34,156
I should tell you that
more often. I'm sorry.
395
00:18:37,594 --> 00:18:40,206
Would you still slay
a dragon for me?
396
00:18:43,731 --> 00:18:45,428
Maybe a baby dragon.
397
00:18:53,567 --> 00:18:55,612
Mrs. Wong gave me
a self-improvement tape.
398
00:18:55,699 --> 00:18:56,961
Would you like
to hear it?
399
00:18:57,048 --> 00:18:59,094
Not right now.
400
00:19:00,313 --> 00:19:01,575
Larry...
401
00:19:02,053 --> 00:19:04,360
I wouldn't hurt you
for anything.
402
00:19:04,447 --> 00:19:06,101
You know that,
don't you?
403
00:19:08,669 --> 00:19:10,323
Why would you say that?
404
00:19:10,410 --> 00:19:12,281
Will you dance with me?
405
00:19:13,326 --> 00:19:15,110
We never dance anymore.
406
00:19:16,546 --> 00:19:18,113
[crash]
407
00:19:20,594 --> 00:19:21,595
[Larry]
Hey, Mitch.
408
00:19:33,998 --> 00:19:36,436
♪ Sunday, Monday
Happy Days ♪
409
00:19:36,523 --> 00:19:38,525
♪ Tuesday, Wednesday
Happy Days ♪
410
00:19:38,612 --> 00:19:41,354
♪ Thursday, Friday
Happy Days ♪
411
00:19:41,441 --> 00:19:42,616
♪ Saturday, what a day ♪
412
00:19:42,703 --> 00:19:44,313
♪ Saturday, what a day ♪
413
00:19:44,400 --> 00:19:45,793
Remember the guy
on the news
414
00:19:45,880 --> 00:19:47,621
who listened to
Ozzy Osborne so much
415
00:19:47,708 --> 00:19:49,840
that his parents sued because
he became a mass murderer?
416
00:19:50,580 --> 00:19:53,627
Well, Aunt Irene told me today,
she's thinking of suing now
417
00:19:53,714 --> 00:19:56,717
because cousin Donald
listened to Barry Manilow
over and over,
418
00:19:56,804 --> 00:19:58,632
and he became a florist.
419
00:19:58,719 --> 00:20:00,547
Aah!
420
00:20:03,506 --> 00:20:06,205
[Larry] That bad, huh?
What's up?
421
00:20:07,336 --> 00:20:09,730
It's the blonde on
the blue bicycle, isn't it?
422
00:20:09,817 --> 00:20:11,906
[chuckles]
Shut up.
423
00:20:11,993 --> 00:20:16,171
The blonde whose initials
are on your Vans.
424
00:20:17,912 --> 00:20:19,479
Shut up.
425
00:20:19,783 --> 00:20:21,829
When I watch
you play soccer,
426
00:20:21,916 --> 00:20:24,005
and the guys go
for Gatorade at the break,
427
00:20:24,092 --> 00:20:26,703
you go and talk
to the blonde on the bicycle.
428
00:20:26,790 --> 00:20:29,532
-I said, "Shut up!"
You're not my mother.
-Mitch!
429
00:20:29,619 --> 00:20:31,142
I'm just trying
to help, Mitchie.
430
00:20:31,230 --> 00:20:32,796
I could give you
the girl's point of view.
431
00:20:32,883 --> 00:20:34,711
Tish, kiss
my squirrel.
432
00:20:34,798 --> 00:20:38,237
Hey, hey, we will have no
squirrel-kissing here tonight.
433
00:20:39,063 --> 00:20:40,804
I was just
trying to help.
434
00:20:40,891 --> 00:20:43,329
I think I should spend a
little time with Mitch alone.
435
00:20:46,984 --> 00:20:50,379
"Kiss my squirrel"?
Hey, come on.
436
00:20:51,598 --> 00:20:52,512
[belches]
437
00:20:52,599 --> 00:20:53,600
Oh, that's very nice.
438
00:21:00,128 --> 00:21:04,393
[female on tape]
Repeat several times a day.
439
00:21:05,655 --> 00:21:09,703
I approve of myself.
440
00:21:11,008 --> 00:21:15,448
I approve of myself.
441
00:21:21,889 --> 00:21:25,458
You're not throwing it
quite hard enough.
442
00:21:25,545 --> 00:21:26,807
I hate Leonard Pearson.
443
00:21:26,894 --> 00:21:27,982
Who?
444
00:21:28,069 --> 00:21:30,680
Leonard Pearson.
In my class.
445
00:21:30,767 --> 00:21:32,813
He follows me around
all the time.
446
00:21:32,900 --> 00:21:34,945
Oh, but you shouldn't hate
anybody, Chloe.
447
00:21:35,032 --> 00:21:37,600
He tells everyone
he loves me.
448
00:21:37,687 --> 00:21:38,862
But that is sweet.
449
00:21:38,949 --> 00:21:40,734
You be sweet
to him, okay?
450
00:21:40,821 --> 00:21:42,431
Bye.
451
00:21:42,518 --> 00:21:43,519
Bye, Mom.
452
00:21:47,654 --> 00:21:48,698
Leonard!
453
00:21:48,785 --> 00:21:50,265
Aah!
454
00:22:23,994 --> 00:22:25,735
Hi, Tom.
455
00:22:25,822 --> 00:22:26,997
Bernadette...
456
00:22:27,084 --> 00:22:29,870
Look, I'm sorry,
457
00:22:29,957 --> 00:22:31,611
But we have to stop
seeing each other.
458
00:22:32,786 --> 00:22:34,004
What?
459
00:22:34,091 --> 00:22:35,571
It's just getting
too serious.
460
00:22:42,535 --> 00:22:43,753
You're right.
461
00:22:46,016 --> 00:22:47,627
[door slams]
462
00:22:55,678 --> 00:22:57,985
Hi. Uh... I'll be with you
463
00:22:58,072 --> 00:22:59,639
in a minute, okay, Tom?
464
00:23:05,035 --> 00:23:06,776
How's your family?
465
00:23:07,124 --> 00:23:08,648
Olga, listen...
466
00:23:08,735 --> 00:23:09,736
About us...
467
00:23:09,823 --> 00:23:11,781
[laughs]
468
00:23:11,868 --> 00:23:14,741
♪ You've got
A new girlfriend ♪
469
00:23:14,828 --> 00:23:16,786
[laughs]
470
00:23:17,918 --> 00:23:19,485
I can't see you anymore.
471
00:23:20,573 --> 00:23:22,662
Lighten up, Tom.
472
00:23:22,749 --> 00:23:24,794
[telephone rings]
473
00:23:24,881 --> 00:23:26,622
Planned Parenthood.
474
00:23:42,856 --> 00:23:44,553
You're not allowed
to talk to the driver.
475
00:23:54,955 --> 00:23:56,435
[Tom clears throat]
476
00:24:02,136 --> 00:24:04,399
Would you excuse me
just one moment?
477
00:24:08,751 --> 00:24:09,665
Hi.
478
00:24:09,752 --> 00:24:10,710
What did you tell him?
479
00:24:10,797 --> 00:24:11,754
Who?
480
00:24:11,841 --> 00:24:13,016
Your husband. About us.
481
00:24:13,103 --> 00:24:14,931
-Nothing.
-Good. Keep it that way.
482
00:24:15,018 --> 00:24:16,759
I just wanted to make sure
you're not one of those
483
00:24:16,846 --> 00:24:18,631
"three beers and you make
a confession" types.
484
00:24:20,067 --> 00:24:22,678
Well, you're a whole lot
different than you were
last night.
485
00:24:22,765 --> 00:24:25,159
Last night never
happened, understand?
486
00:24:25,246 --> 00:24:26,726
I've changed
my whole life today.
487
00:24:26,813 --> 00:24:28,249
I've cleaned up my act.
No more women.
488
00:24:28,336 --> 00:24:30,991
Last night never
happened, understand?
489
00:24:31,078 --> 00:24:32,862
And if you ever say
that it did,
490
00:24:32,949 --> 00:24:34,821
if use the "f" word
about us,
491
00:24:34,908 --> 00:24:37,040
If even the "fuh" sounds
comes out of your mouth,
492
00:24:37,127 --> 00:24:38,694
I will denounce you
as a liar
493
00:24:38,781 --> 00:24:40,087
and a home-wrecker,
do you understand?
494
00:24:40,174 --> 00:24:41,567
[woman] Miss!
495
00:24:42,002 --> 00:24:43,656
Excuse me. I have
to get back to her
496
00:24:43,743 --> 00:24:45,658
or her eyeliner
will cake.
497
00:24:46,702 --> 00:24:48,051
Do you understand?
498
00:24:48,138 --> 00:24:50,924
I have an IQ
in the triple digits.
499
00:24:51,011 --> 00:24:53,143
What word do you think
I didn't understand?
500
00:24:53,230 --> 00:24:56,625
Okay. I just wanted to make
sure you understood.
501
00:24:57,365 --> 00:24:58,845
Are you wearing
black underwear?
502
00:24:58,932 --> 00:25:00,542
Yes.
503
00:25:01,021 --> 00:25:02,762
Want to meet me
for a drink later?
504
00:25:06,200 --> 00:25:08,855
Kiss my squirrel.
505
00:25:13,816 --> 00:25:16,253
So they drove
to a shopping mall
506
00:25:16,340 --> 00:25:18,691
and parked in back
of a supermarket
507
00:25:18,778 --> 00:25:22,085
behind a dumpster
in our car
508
00:25:22,825 --> 00:25:25,219
that I make payments on
by sweating my ass off
509
00:25:25,306 --> 00:25:28,048
so she can sweat
her ass off inside it!
510
00:25:28,135 --> 00:25:29,571
Sorry.
511
00:25:30,703 --> 00:25:32,095
Now, that car was rocking
512
00:25:32,182 --> 00:25:33,662
like an out-of-whack
washing machine.
513
00:25:33,749 --> 00:25:35,229
I went crazy. I--
514
00:25:35,316 --> 00:25:37,187
Are you getting
all this down, Maria?
515
00:25:37,274 --> 00:25:38,928
-Yes, I am, Mr. Bregman.
-Okay.
516
00:25:39,842 --> 00:25:44,499
I decided to kill her,
but I couldn't.
517
00:25:45,892 --> 00:25:47,633
I love her.
518
00:25:48,808 --> 00:25:50,766
So I shaved her head,
519
00:25:50,853 --> 00:25:53,682
and now see
if he wants her.
520
00:25:53,769 --> 00:25:55,771
That is why your wife
521
00:25:55,858 --> 00:25:58,513
is suing you for divorce,
Mr. Dionne?
522
00:26:00,297 --> 00:26:02,517
[Mr. Dionne]
Love is shit.
523
00:26:03,736 --> 00:26:05,215
Marriage is shit.
524
00:26:05,302 --> 00:26:06,390
[Mr. Bregman]
You know, I'm sitting here
525
00:26:06,477 --> 00:26:08,131
listening to you editorialize.
526
00:26:08,218 --> 00:26:09,829
[Mr. Dionne]
Well, fuck you,
moneybags, hey?
527
00:26:29,196 --> 00:26:30,850
My favorite part-- boing!
528
00:26:30,937 --> 00:26:33,722
Here we go.
All right. Remember--
529
00:26:33,809 --> 00:26:35,245
Happy, happy, happy.
530
00:26:35,332 --> 00:26:37,117
No, no. We're doing
the cha-cha here.
531
00:26:37,204 --> 00:26:39,423
All right.
Remember, ladies,
532
00:26:39,510 --> 00:26:41,121
it's ok to smile...
533
00:26:41,208 --> 00:26:42,862
especially
at my jokes.
534
00:26:42,949 --> 00:26:45,038
Ready and...
535
00:26:45,125 --> 00:26:46,692
Cha-cha-cha.
536
00:26:46,779 --> 00:26:48,128
Swivel, swivel.
537
00:26:48,215 --> 00:26:50,130
Forward, back, forward.
538
00:26:50,217 --> 00:26:52,001
I can't even say it right.
539
00:26:52,088 --> 00:26:53,960
Hit him, Maggie,
if he does that right.
540
00:26:54,047 --> 00:26:57,703
Let's do it again.
Ready and cha-cha-cha.
541
00:26:57,790 --> 00:26:59,226
Swivel, swivel.
542
00:26:59,313 --> 00:27:01,097
Forward, cross, forward.
543
00:27:01,184 --> 00:27:02,925
Who's leading here?
544
00:27:03,665 --> 00:27:05,275
That's all right, you lead.
You're doing a good job,
Freddy.
545
00:27:05,362 --> 00:27:06,799
I want these suspenders.
546
00:27:06,886 --> 00:27:08,931
Ready and
cha-cha-cha.
547
00:27:09,018 --> 00:27:10,280
Swivel, swivel.
548
00:27:10,367 --> 00:27:11,804
Forward, cross, forward.
549
00:27:11,891 --> 00:27:15,895
Up, six, seven, eight.
550
00:27:15,982 --> 00:27:17,287
And one...
551
00:27:17,374 --> 00:27:20,726
two, three, four...
552
00:27:21,814 --> 00:27:24,730
[Larry]
All right. You know, you're
gonna put me out of work.
553
00:27:24,817 --> 00:27:25,992
You're too good.
554
00:27:26,079 --> 00:27:27,907
One more time.
Ready and...
555
00:27:27,994 --> 00:27:29,778
Cha-cha-cha.
556
00:27:29,865 --> 00:27:32,128
Oh, my God.
No, no, no.
557
00:27:32,215 --> 00:27:33,826
Let me show you one more time.
558
00:27:33,913 --> 00:27:35,741
One more time,
everybody.
559
00:27:37,394 --> 00:27:38,787
Mrs. Greenblatt.
560
00:27:49,232 --> 00:27:51,670
Ha ha. You
look mahvelous.
561
00:28:04,334 --> 00:28:06,685
Magnificent.
A thing of beauty.
562
00:28:07,294 --> 00:28:08,730
Thank you,
thank you.
563
00:28:11,515 --> 00:28:13,909
Okay, that's it.
Time's up, everybody.
564
00:28:13,996 --> 00:28:15,345
Practice,
practice, practice.
565
00:28:15,432 --> 00:28:17,043
Yes, practice,
practice, practice.
566
00:28:17,130 --> 00:28:19,132
Goodbye.
Get out of here.
567
00:28:19,219 --> 00:28:21,221
Get out of here,
get out of here,
you crazy guys.
568
00:28:21,308 --> 00:28:22,396
Thanks.
Get new shoes.
569
00:28:22,483 --> 00:28:24,267
Those are not gonna work.
570
00:28:24,354 --> 00:28:27,009
Okay, oh, don't forget to bring
your checks next week.
571
00:28:28,402 --> 00:28:29,925
Hi.
572
00:28:30,012 --> 00:28:31,361
Hi.
573
00:28:31,448 --> 00:28:33,842
[Larry]
You came for
your free lesson.
574
00:28:34,234 --> 00:28:36,453
No, it's my lunch break.
575
00:28:36,540 --> 00:28:38,760
And I thought that maybe
we could talk.
576
00:28:44,200 --> 00:28:46,202
-[Larry] Mexican?
-[Maria] It's too heavy.
577
00:28:46,637 --> 00:28:48,422
[Maria]
I don't know how to say this.
578
00:28:48,509 --> 00:28:49,815
[Larry]
Well, words are good.
579
00:28:50,206 --> 00:28:51,773
[Maria]
They have fried octopus?
580
00:28:52,339 --> 00:28:53,775
[Larry]
No, I had that
for breakfast.
581
00:28:56,386 --> 00:28:58,040
[Maria]
This is difficult.
582
00:28:58,127 --> 00:29:00,956
Oh, come on.
It's only lunch.
583
00:29:01,043 --> 00:29:02,131
Burgers.
584
00:29:02,218 --> 00:29:04,090
No, too obvious.
585
00:29:04,960 --> 00:29:07,876
Larry? I need
to ask you something.
586
00:29:09,965 --> 00:29:11,488
Do I think that...
587
00:29:11,575 --> 00:29:14,013
your husband and my wife
slept together?
588
00:29:16,406 --> 00:29:18,452
Thank you. It would
have taken me a lot longer.
589
00:29:18,974 --> 00:29:22,021
Well, I only have
an hour for lunch.
590
00:29:23,283 --> 00:29:25,067
Ah... Spuds International.
591
00:29:25,154 --> 00:29:27,940
Everything you ever
wanted on a potato and more.
592
00:29:28,027 --> 00:29:30,029
I think they had one
with a Buick on it.
593
00:29:30,638 --> 00:29:32,727
Do you think
they did?
594
00:29:33,815 --> 00:29:36,731
I don't know.
Only they know.
595
00:29:38,124 --> 00:29:40,126
You don't seem
to be upset about it.
596
00:29:40,474 --> 00:29:42,215
Sex isn't that big
a deal anyway.
597
00:29:42,737 --> 00:29:45,348
Whether they
had sex or not,
something happened.
598
00:29:45,435 --> 00:29:49,135
Hey, I believe
in people's
freedom of choice.
599
00:29:49,222 --> 00:29:51,050
Tish needs to grow up
to be her own person.
600
00:29:51,137 --> 00:29:52,529
Now that's me.
601
00:29:52,616 --> 00:29:54,009
What people do
is their own business.
602
00:29:54,096 --> 00:29:56,229
That doesn't
apply to marriage.
603
00:29:56,316 --> 00:29:58,144
Well, it sounds to me
you have a choice to make.
604
00:29:58,231 --> 00:30:00,842
And guess what?
You're free to make it.
605
00:30:02,278 --> 00:30:05,151
This is great. We hardly
know each other,
606
00:30:05,238 --> 00:30:07,762
and we're already getting
our first argument
out of the way.
607
00:30:11,113 --> 00:30:13,246
Are you serious about
that freedom stuff?
608
00:30:15,161 --> 00:30:16,118
Yes.
609
00:30:20,122 --> 00:30:23,038
No! Oh, God,
I'm so full of shit!
610
00:30:23,125 --> 00:30:25,214
I'd like to kill them both!
611
00:30:25,301 --> 00:30:26,302
I'm sorry.
612
00:30:26,389 --> 00:30:28,000
[yelling in Chinese]
613
00:30:28,087 --> 00:30:29,958
Sorry, I will pay for it.
614
00:30:30,654 --> 00:30:33,005
-No, it's my fault.
-I will pay for the fish.
I broke the fish.
615
00:30:33,092 --> 00:30:34,920
I shouldn't
have come.
616
00:30:35,007 --> 00:30:36,965
No, wait--
how much?
617
00:30:37,052 --> 00:30:38,271
Never--never mind.
618
00:30:38,358 --> 00:30:39,707
Wait, wait.
619
00:30:39,794 --> 00:30:42,057
Please, I'm, uh...
I'm very sorry.
620
00:30:44,016 --> 00:30:47,062
Whoa. It wasn't easy
621
00:30:47,149 --> 00:30:48,672
for you to come
see me today, was it?
622
00:30:48,759 --> 00:30:50,936
-No.
-Are you okay?
623
00:30:51,588 --> 00:30:53,939
No, I'm not okay.
624
00:30:54,417 --> 00:30:55,505
That's right.
625
00:30:55,592 --> 00:30:57,812
You don't cry,
do you?
626
00:30:59,031 --> 00:31:00,641
Or hit fish.
627
00:31:00,728 --> 00:31:02,077
Oh, God.
628
00:31:02,164 --> 00:31:03,513
Ooh, jeez.
629
00:31:04,514 --> 00:31:08,170
[Maria]
You know, Tom lately has
been really upset about work.
630
00:31:08,257 --> 00:31:10,520
They have these contests--
who sells the most cars.
631
00:31:10,607 --> 00:31:12,653
And he lost his trip
to Las Vegas.
632
00:31:12,740 --> 00:31:14,960
Well, that's a good reason
to hump my wife.
633
00:31:16,222 --> 00:31:17,484
I'm sorry.
634
00:31:17,571 --> 00:31:19,573
Listen, Tish is
a good person.
635
00:31:19,660 --> 00:31:22,228
She just wants to be
appreciated for
more than her looks.
636
00:31:22,315 --> 00:31:24,404
She's worried people
think she's dumb.
637
00:31:24,491 --> 00:31:27,407
She's not dumb.
Tom is very vulnerable
to female flattery.
638
00:31:27,494 --> 00:31:29,322
Why do you keep making
excuses for your husband?
639
00:31:29,409 --> 00:31:31,324
Mm, because you're making
excuses for your wife.
640
00:31:31,411 --> 00:31:35,241
All right, all right.
So, how did you two meet?
641
00:31:35,632 --> 00:31:37,504
We met in high school.
642
00:31:37,591 --> 00:31:40,420
He was an athlete,
a big athlete.
643
00:31:40,507 --> 00:31:42,552
And he had the red car
he was very proud of.
644
00:31:42,639 --> 00:31:44,337
Girls were crazy
about him.
645
00:31:45,338 --> 00:31:47,296
And I just came to this
country, And I was very shy.
646
00:31:47,383 --> 00:31:49,342
I couldn't believe when
he came and talked to me.
647
00:31:49,429 --> 00:31:51,213
Well, he must've said
something right,
648
00:31:51,300 --> 00:31:52,432
to get you to marry him.
649
00:31:52,519 --> 00:31:54,260
No. I was
the only girl
650
00:31:54,347 --> 00:31:56,044
who wouldn't
go to sleep with him.
651
00:31:57,306 --> 00:31:58,481
What about you?
652
00:31:58,960 --> 00:32:00,570
I guess I thought Tish
was going to be different
653
00:32:00,657 --> 00:32:02,355
than my first wife.
654
00:32:02,442 --> 00:32:03,573
Surprise, you know?
655
00:32:04,183 --> 00:32:05,924
Turns out she's the bride
of Bloomingdale's.
656
00:32:08,578 --> 00:32:10,450
So, what do you
want to do?
657
00:32:10,537 --> 00:32:12,060
You want to
confront them?
658
00:32:12,147 --> 00:32:13,496
They'll just deny it.
659
00:32:13,583 --> 00:32:15,934
We could
shave their heads.
660
00:32:16,630 --> 00:32:18,327
What?
661
00:32:18,414 --> 00:32:21,330
I have to go back
to work. I'm sorry.
662
00:32:21,417 --> 00:32:23,245
I'm sorry if
I spoiled your day.
663
00:32:23,985 --> 00:32:26,292
It was nice not having
lunch with you.
664
00:32:28,294 --> 00:32:29,948
Bye.
665
00:32:30,557 --> 00:32:32,080
Goodbye, Maria.
666
00:32:39,958 --> 00:32:41,307
[Chloe]
And he said, "No way."
667
00:32:41,916 --> 00:32:43,265
Sweetheart, I'm going to put
your flowers in this vase.
668
00:32:43,352 --> 00:32:45,093
You could do your homework.
669
00:32:47,574 --> 00:32:49,228
What's in the box, Daddy?
670
00:32:49,706 --> 00:32:50,577
What's this?
671
00:32:50,664 --> 00:32:52,361
Open it.
672
00:32:54,363 --> 00:32:56,148
And tonight
I'm going to make
673
00:32:56,235 --> 00:32:58,324
my world famous
garlic chicken pamplona.
674
00:32:59,455 --> 00:33:00,761
[Chloe] Yay!
675
00:33:00,848 --> 00:33:02,328
Not only that,
I'll even clean up
676
00:33:02,415 --> 00:33:04,199
after I use every pot
in the house.
677
00:33:04,286 --> 00:33:05,200
I promise.
678
00:33:07,246 --> 00:33:09,030
Tom, this is beautiful.
679
00:33:10,510 --> 00:33:12,338
What's the occasion?
680
00:33:12,642 --> 00:33:15,254
Nothing. Just us.
681
00:33:16,733 --> 00:33:18,083
All of us together.
682
00:33:18,170 --> 00:33:20,172
Just one of those nights.
683
00:33:20,563 --> 00:33:22,217
It's nice to have a family.
684
00:33:29,920 --> 00:33:32,271
So, how was your day?
685
00:33:33,185 --> 00:33:34,490
Fine.
686
00:33:34,577 --> 00:33:36,362
I had lunch
with Larry Kozinski.
687
00:33:38,233 --> 00:33:40,192
-Who?
-Larry Kozinski.
688
00:33:40,279 --> 00:33:41,671
I had lunch
with him today.
689
00:33:41,758 --> 00:33:43,325
Sweetheart, don't
wrinkle it.
690
00:33:43,412 --> 00:33:46,328
Why? Uh...what for?
691
00:33:46,981 --> 00:33:49,462
What did you
talk about?
692
00:33:49,549 --> 00:33:51,290
Hmm, nothing special.
693
00:33:52,552 --> 00:33:54,423
Was it a nice lunch?
694
00:33:54,510 --> 00:33:57,035
Mm-hmm, very nice.
695
00:33:58,514 --> 00:34:01,300
Well...that's fine.
That's good.
696
00:34:01,648 --> 00:34:04,216
That's okay. I'm glad
you had a nice day.
697
00:34:04,781 --> 00:34:06,174
Good old Larry.
698
00:34:06,522 --> 00:34:09,395
Lunch... nice.
699
00:34:11,397 --> 00:34:13,703
Mitchie is, uh--
what is it you are,
again, Mitchie?
700
00:34:13,790 --> 00:34:16,271
I'm a multimedia artist,
701
00:34:16,358 --> 00:34:18,186
but my emphasis
is on video.
702
00:34:19,579 --> 00:34:21,015
I'm so excited.
703
00:34:33,332 --> 00:34:35,334
♪ Sunday, Monday,
Happy Days ♪
704
00:34:35,421 --> 00:34:37,466
♪ Tuesday, Wednesday,
Happy Days ♪
705
00:34:37,553 --> 00:34:40,339
♪ Thursday, Friday,
Happy Days ♪
706
00:34:40,426 --> 00:34:42,776
♪ The weekend comes
The cycle hums ♪
707
00:34:42,863 --> 00:34:44,691
♪ Ready to race to you ♪
708
00:34:44,778 --> 00:34:48,434
♪ These days are ours ♪
709
00:34:48,521 --> 00:34:50,958
♪ Happy and free
Oh, Happy Days ♪
710
00:34:51,045 --> 00:34:53,613
♪ These days are ours ♪
711
00:34:53,700 --> 00:34:55,354
♪ Share them with me ♪
712
00:34:55,441 --> 00:34:57,878
♪ Goodbye gray skies,
Hello blue ♪
713
00:34:57,965 --> 00:35:00,359
♪ Nothing can hurt me
When I hold you ♪
714
00:35:00,446 --> 00:35:02,883
♪ Feels so right
It can't be wrong ♪
715
00:35:02,970 --> 00:35:05,277
♪ Rockin' and rollin'
All week long...♪
716
00:35:05,364 --> 00:35:07,061
-That's her.
-Very nice.
717
00:35:16,462 --> 00:35:18,116
♪ Sunday, Monday
Happy Days ♪
718
00:35:18,203 --> 00:35:20,509
♪ Tuesday, Wednesday
Happy Days ♪
719
00:35:20,596 --> 00:35:22,685
♪ Thursday, Friday,
Happy Days ♪
720
00:35:22,772 --> 00:35:25,471
♪ Saturday, what a day ♪
721
00:35:25,558 --> 00:35:28,561
♪ Groovin' all week
With you ♪
722
00:35:28,648 --> 00:35:32,652
♪ These days are ours
Share them with me ♪
723
00:35:32,739 --> 00:35:34,262
♪ Oh, Happy Days ♪
724
00:35:34,349 --> 00:35:36,308
♪ These days are ours ♪
725
00:35:36,395 --> 00:35:37,526
♪ Happy and free...♪
726
00:35:37,613 --> 00:35:39,528
[groans]
727
00:35:40,486 --> 00:35:43,489
♪ Nothing can hurt me
When I hold you... ♪
728
00:35:43,576 --> 00:35:45,491
-Well, you're a God damn liar!
-Well, you're a thief!
729
00:35:45,578 --> 00:35:48,407
♪ Rockin' and rollin'
All week long ♪
730
00:35:48,494 --> 00:35:49,843
Whoa, whoa.
731
00:35:49,930 --> 00:35:52,324
Whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, cut!
732
00:35:52,411 --> 00:35:53,586
Cut!
733
00:35:53,673 --> 00:35:55,370
Lights!
734
00:35:58,852 --> 00:36:00,375
Thank you.
735
00:36:00,984 --> 00:36:02,595
Uncle Tom, you did
the wrong thing.
736
00:36:02,682 --> 00:36:05,380
How about lunch, huh?
737
00:36:09,428 --> 00:36:12,474
You are a very
sick young man.
738
00:36:12,735 --> 00:36:14,650
Alienation...
739
00:36:14,737 --> 00:36:16,348
Great.
740
00:36:16,435 --> 00:36:17,871
Interesting work,
Mitch.
741
00:36:17,958 --> 00:36:19,960
-Thanks, Dad.
-Yeah.
742
00:36:20,047 --> 00:36:23,355
What the hell are you
doing taking my wife
out to lunch?
743
00:36:23,920 --> 00:36:25,618
Actually,
we didn't have lunch.
744
00:36:25,705 --> 00:36:29,404
We went for a walk,
but my feet broke down,
745
00:36:29,491 --> 00:36:31,319
so we were a little late
getting back.
746
00:36:36,890 --> 00:36:38,631
They know.
747
00:36:38,718 --> 00:36:40,372
They know about us.
748
00:36:40,459 --> 00:36:42,330
[Bunny hop music plays]
749
00:36:55,822 --> 00:36:57,563
Work in garbage
all week,
750
00:36:57,650 --> 00:37:00,218
enjoy nature
on the weekends.
751
00:37:00,914 --> 00:37:02,872
Here we go--
ooh, ooh, ooh.
752
00:37:02,959 --> 00:37:05,527
All right now,
faster.
753
00:37:06,833 --> 00:37:08,313
Tell me
about Larry.
754
00:37:08,400 --> 00:37:10,619
Larry, Larry.
755
00:37:10,706 --> 00:37:12,882
I've asked him
a million times
756
00:37:12,969 --> 00:37:14,797
to come into
the business,
757
00:37:14,884 --> 00:37:16,495
but he wants
to change jobs...
758
00:37:16,582 --> 00:37:18,061
Dance.
759
00:37:18,148 --> 00:37:21,630
To me-- and I say this
with love, Maria--
760
00:37:21,717 --> 00:37:22,892
Larry is a failure
761
00:37:22,979 --> 00:37:24,677
in everything
except life.
762
00:37:24,764 --> 00:37:25,765
Come!
Dance with me!
763
00:37:25,852 --> 00:37:27,070
Yes.
764
00:37:27,157 --> 00:37:28,115
A wild woman.
765
00:37:28,202 --> 00:37:30,248
Come on,
come on.
766
00:37:31,466 --> 00:37:32,641
Show her how
to do it, girls.
767
00:37:32,728 --> 00:37:33,686
They were...
768
00:37:33,773 --> 00:37:35,514
Aw--aw, don't...
769
00:37:35,601 --> 00:37:37,603
No. You go.
770
00:37:37,907 --> 00:37:39,866
Oh, we're gonna
miss you.
771
00:37:39,953 --> 00:37:41,476
Whose shoe?
772
00:37:42,260 --> 00:37:43,870
Phil, do you
want some cake?
773
00:37:43,957 --> 00:37:45,611
Phil?
774
00:37:48,788 --> 00:37:50,355
Phil?
775
00:37:52,487 --> 00:37:54,402
Come on, asshole.
Come on!
776
00:37:58,972 --> 00:38:00,669
Larry,
something's wrong.
777
00:38:00,756 --> 00:38:02,715
One shot, man.
That's all it will take.
778
00:38:02,802 --> 00:38:03,672
One shot. I'm right here!
779
00:38:03,759 --> 00:38:05,021
[whistles]
780
00:38:05,108 --> 00:38:06,936
I won't have this.
Stop. Stop.
781
00:38:07,023 --> 00:38:09,678
Stop it, Tom,
stop it!
782
00:38:09,765 --> 00:38:11,289
But, Mama...
783
00:38:14,509 --> 00:38:16,250
Phil!
784
00:38:19,949 --> 00:38:21,777
Phil...
785
00:38:21,864 --> 00:38:23,431
Phil!
786
00:38:26,956 --> 00:38:28,958
Amore mio.
787
00:38:29,045 --> 00:38:30,699
Don't leave me.
788
00:38:30,786 --> 00:38:33,354
[sobbing]
789
00:38:50,328 --> 00:38:52,112
[priest]
So that even though I walk
790
00:38:52,199 --> 00:38:54,027
through the valley
of the shadow of death,
791
00:38:54,114 --> 00:38:56,551
I fear no evil
for thou art with me.
792
00:38:56,638 --> 00:38:59,032
Thy rod and thy staff,
they comfort me.
793
00:38:59,119 --> 00:39:01,513
Thou preparest a table
before me
794
00:39:01,600 --> 00:39:02,949
in the presence
of mine enemies.
795
00:39:03,036 --> 00:39:04,733
My cup overflows.
796
00:39:04,820 --> 00:39:07,910
Surely goodness and mercy
shall follow me
797
00:39:07,997 --> 00:39:09,869
all the days
of my life,
798
00:39:09,956 --> 00:39:11,261
and I shall dwell
799
00:39:11,349 --> 00:39:13,612
in the house
of the Lord forever.
800
00:39:13,699 --> 00:39:14,917
Let us pray.
801
00:39:15,744 --> 00:39:18,747
Oh, God, whose days
are without an end...
802
00:39:19,269 --> 00:39:21,010
Give me back
my 50 cents.
803
00:39:21,097 --> 00:39:22,534
Take your dime,
sport.
804
00:39:22,621 --> 00:39:25,058
Damn child,
just a lousy fare.
805
00:39:25,145 --> 00:39:27,365
What do you
think I am, huh?
806
00:39:28,104 --> 00:39:29,758
A God damn tourist?
807
00:39:29,845 --> 00:39:31,456
Cheapskate.
808
00:39:35,677 --> 00:39:37,897
Pop, you were
supposed to call me.
809
00:39:37,984 --> 00:39:40,900
For what, a ride
on that motorcycle of yours?
810
00:39:40,987 --> 00:39:43,032
Good to see you, son.
811
00:39:43,119 --> 00:39:45,034
Good God.
Is this Mitchie?
812
00:39:45,121 --> 00:39:46,688
How are you doing,
Grandpa?
813
00:39:46,775 --> 00:39:48,429
I'll be damned!
814
00:39:48,516 --> 00:39:50,910
You're getting to be
a big man, aren't you, huh?
815
00:39:50,997 --> 00:39:52,738
-Yeah.
-[chuckles]
816
00:39:52,825 --> 00:39:53,913
Let's go.
817
00:39:54,000 --> 00:39:55,262
No, no.
You go ahead.
818
00:39:55,349 --> 00:39:57,090
No, I--I'll wait
right here.
819
00:39:57,177 --> 00:40:00,485
At my age, you don't want to
get too close to an open grave.
820
00:40:00,572 --> 00:40:02,617
Hm. Stay with him.
821
00:40:05,968 --> 00:40:07,579
So. So, Grandpa,
822
00:40:07,666 --> 00:40:08,841
how come you didn't
come to the church?
823
00:40:08,928 --> 00:40:11,104
Uh, God makes me nervous
824
00:40:11,191 --> 00:40:12,845
when you get him
indoors.
825
00:40:12,932 --> 00:40:15,804
I don't like to see
people in their coffins.
826
00:40:15,891 --> 00:40:18,677
They always look so much
smaller without their spirits.
827
00:40:29,252 --> 00:40:32,517
I was going to bring you
a gift, but I forgot.
828
00:40:34,954 --> 00:40:37,565
Think you might like
one of these, huh?
829
00:40:38,566 --> 00:40:41,787
Which one you want?
Hot Patty's Pajama Party?
830
00:40:41,874 --> 00:40:43,876
or G irls with Big Jugs?
831
00:40:48,097 --> 00:40:50,926
Eat. There's
casseroles, cakes.
832
00:40:51,013 --> 00:40:53,668
I have turkey tetrazzini
coming out the wazoo.
833
00:40:53,755 --> 00:40:56,932
Phil, Phil.
Everyone loved him so.
834
00:40:57,019 --> 00:41:00,458
Did you see the wreath the boys
from the junkyard sent?
835
00:41:01,459 --> 00:41:04,766
Larry, was it me?
Was I too much for him?
836
00:41:04,853 --> 00:41:07,682
No, Edie, he's the happiest
he'd ever been with you.
837
00:41:07,769 --> 00:41:09,945
I want you to meet
my father, Vince.
838
00:41:10,032 --> 00:41:12,905
My sympathies.
Sorry I missed your wedding.
839
00:41:12,992 --> 00:41:14,559
My hernia
prevented it.
840
00:41:15,951 --> 00:41:17,126
Edie, I'm sorry.
841
00:41:17,213 --> 00:41:19,085
I have to go to work.
842
00:41:19,172 --> 00:41:20,956
We are still family
843
00:41:21,043 --> 00:41:22,001
even though
Phil is gone.
844
00:41:22,088 --> 00:41:23,872
So, don't be a stranger.
845
00:41:23,959 --> 00:41:25,874
I won't. I promise.
846
00:41:26,440 --> 00:41:28,703
See you later.
Bye, Pops.
847
00:41:28,790 --> 00:41:30,662
-Thank you.
-Nobody takes a day off
848
00:41:30,749 --> 00:41:32,577
when a man dies anymore?
849
00:41:32,664 --> 00:41:33,708
Jesus!
850
00:41:36,015 --> 00:41:38,757
You know, funerals make
women really horny.
851
00:41:38,844 --> 00:41:40,802
I never knew Phil
all that well,
852
00:41:40,889 --> 00:41:43,718
-but this is great
turkey tetrazzini, yeah?
-Mmm.
853
00:41:43,805 --> 00:41:45,111
Here, Mommy.
854
00:41:45,198 --> 00:41:47,069
Oh, thank you.
855
00:41:47,156 --> 00:41:49,289
Look, I gotta go
show a car.
856
00:41:49,376 --> 00:41:51,552
As long as Chloe's
staying overnight here,
857
00:41:51,639 --> 00:41:55,034
why don't, uh, why don't
you meet me about 7:30,
and we'll go out to eat.
858
00:41:55,121 --> 00:41:57,558
If Mama doesn't need me.
859
00:41:59,517 --> 00:42:00,779
Well, if your mom
doesn't need you,
860
00:42:00,866 --> 00:42:02,258
maybe you can meet me
at the showroom.
861
00:42:02,345 --> 00:42:04,130
Mm-hmm. Yes, if Mama
doesn't need me,
862
00:42:04,217 --> 00:42:06,480
I'll be there. 7:30.
863
00:42:08,221 --> 00:42:09,744
Okay.
864
00:42:12,791 --> 00:42:14,793
Beauty and the Beast.
865
00:42:15,141 --> 00:42:16,925
[Mitch]
I'm never gonna
get married.
866
00:42:17,273 --> 00:42:18,927
You wait, you see.
867
00:42:19,014 --> 00:42:20,929
You'll get married,
have kids,
868
00:42:21,016 --> 00:42:22,322
have a happy life.
869
00:42:22,409 --> 00:42:24,585
Don't eat too much
butter though.
870
00:42:25,325 --> 00:42:28,023
-You know what I'd
really like to do?
-What?
871
00:42:28,110 --> 00:42:29,024
Kill someone.
872
00:42:29,111 --> 00:42:30,156
What?
873
00:42:30,243 --> 00:42:31,636
Calmly plan a murder.
874
00:42:31,723 --> 00:42:34,116
Choose the victim.
875
00:42:34,203 --> 00:42:35,814
Maybe even
someone political--
876
00:42:35,901 --> 00:42:37,990
so I could do the world
some good, you know?
877
00:42:38,077 --> 00:42:40,819
I'd have to think
about it first
for a few years.
878
00:42:41,994 --> 00:42:44,736
Hey, it can't be any dumber
than getting married
879
00:42:44,823 --> 00:42:46,259
And going to work
every day.
880
00:42:46,346 --> 00:42:48,000
I mean, it must be
more fun.
881
00:42:50,219 --> 00:42:52,178
No nos spostato.
882
00:42:52,874 --> 00:42:55,921
Mr. Zee, I'm gonna
be a little late getting back.
883
00:42:57,226 --> 00:42:59,664
It's hard to rush
a funeral.
884
00:43:00,969 --> 00:43:02,623
As soon as I can.
885
00:43:07,454 --> 00:43:10,109
-What took you so long?
-Just get in the car.
886
00:43:10,631 --> 00:43:13,329
I think you forgot
to say "Please."
887
00:43:13,416 --> 00:43:14,853
Just get in the car,
will ya?
888
00:43:16,985 --> 00:43:18,552
Oh, you're so manly.
889
00:43:24,906 --> 00:43:27,692
There. Uh,
there's my wife.
890
00:43:29,389 --> 00:43:31,217
We were married
for 35 years
891
00:43:31,304 --> 00:43:33,698
and she never once
raised her voice to me.
892
00:43:36,962 --> 00:43:40,052
-So then you know
what it's like to lose someone?
-Mm.
893
00:43:40,139 --> 00:43:41,793
She went
in the hospital
894
00:43:41,880 --> 00:43:43,708
to have
a boil removed.
895
00:43:43,795 --> 00:43:45,318
Never came out.
896
00:43:45,405 --> 00:43:47,146
I moved upstate,
bought some gas stations.
897
00:43:47,233 --> 00:43:49,061
I did quite well,
898
00:43:49,148 --> 00:43:52,064
but I've had
to learn to live
with loneliness.
899
00:43:52,151 --> 00:43:53,369
Hmm?
900
00:43:53,456 --> 00:43:55,241
Life is that way.
901
00:43:55,328 --> 00:43:56,851
Who can explain it?
902
00:43:57,330 --> 00:43:58,853
I thought Phil and I
903
00:43:58,940 --> 00:44:01,813
would share the rest
of our lives together.
904
00:44:02,074 --> 00:44:03,989
Now all I have left
905
00:44:04,076 --> 00:44:06,208
is his share
of the garbage company.
906
00:44:07,035 --> 00:44:09,864
What am I going to do
with a garbage company?
907
00:44:11,300 --> 00:44:13,694
I don't know anything
about business.
908
00:44:16,088 --> 00:44:18,786
Perhaps you
would be interested
in buying me out?
909
00:44:18,873 --> 00:44:21,049
[chuckles]
910
00:44:21,746 --> 00:44:24,574
Well, maybe I could
give you something
911
00:44:24,662 --> 00:44:26,794
for your part
of the business.
912
00:44:26,881 --> 00:44:28,361
Something?
913
00:44:28,448 --> 00:44:30,363
What neighborhood
of "something"
914
00:44:30,450 --> 00:44:32,147
would we be
talking about?
915
00:44:32,234 --> 00:44:36,761
[both chuckle]
916
00:44:38,980 --> 00:44:41,113
-Will you be all right?
-Yes.
917
00:44:41,200 --> 00:44:42,810
-Bye, Mom.
-And you?
918
00:44:43,332 --> 00:44:44,986
See you in the city, son.
I'm taking Mitchie with me.
919
00:44:45,073 --> 00:44:46,945
I don't think riding that
thing's good for his gonads.
920
00:44:47,032 --> 00:44:48,120
All right.
921
00:44:48,207 --> 00:44:49,774
My sympathies,
Maria.
922
00:44:49,861 --> 00:44:51,645
Bye.
923
00:44:52,515 --> 00:44:53,952
Bye, Larry.
Thank you.
924
00:44:54,039 --> 00:44:55,083
Bye-bye.
925
00:44:55,344 --> 00:44:56,824
Are you coming
with us, Maria?
926
00:45:17,279 --> 00:45:18,890
Why are we here?
927
00:45:18,977 --> 00:45:20,543
I thought you were
taking me home.
928
00:45:20,630 --> 00:45:22,328
Do you want to go home?
I'll take you home.
929
00:45:22,415 --> 00:45:24,896
No, that's all right.
I just wondered.
930
00:45:25,505 --> 00:45:27,246
What were
you singing?
931
00:45:27,333 --> 00:45:29,422
I wasn't singing.
932
00:45:29,509 --> 00:45:30,945
Well, no, you just
didn't think
933
00:45:31,032 --> 00:45:31,946
I couldn't hear you
over the engine.
934
00:45:32,033 --> 00:45:33,165
but I could.
935
00:45:33,252 --> 00:45:34,993
You don't cry
at weddings,
936
00:45:35,080 --> 00:45:36,690
but you sing
at funerals.
937
00:45:36,777 --> 00:45:38,300
You told me you weren't
an interesting person.
938
00:45:38,387 --> 00:45:40,128
I'm not.
939
00:45:40,215 --> 00:45:42,000
Come on, what were
you singing?
940
00:45:43,262 --> 00:45:44,350
I don't sing
for people.
941
00:45:44,437 --> 00:45:45,830
It's private.
942
00:45:45,917 --> 00:45:47,092
Oh.
943
00:45:47,179 --> 00:45:48,920
Well, hum
a few bars then.
944
00:45:49,921 --> 00:45:51,749
[hums]
945
00:45:52,750 --> 00:45:55,056
Well, what song
is that?
946
00:45:56,057 --> 00:45:57,363
[hums]
947
00:45:57,450 --> 00:45:58,886
[hums]
948
00:45:58,973 --> 00:46:01,323
Boy, I still
have no idea.
949
00:46:01,410 --> 00:46:03,978
It's a Beatles song.
Now guess.
950
00:46:04,065 --> 00:46:05,371
Oh, I hate to
break this to you,
951
00:46:05,458 --> 00:46:06,938
but that tune has
no resemblance
952
00:46:07,025 --> 00:46:08,940
to any song The Beatles
ever recorded.
953
00:46:09,027 --> 00:46:11,377
It's "The Long
and Winding Road."
954
00:46:11,464 --> 00:46:13,901
Oh, no. No, that
goes more like...
955
00:46:14,206 --> 00:46:16,730
[hums]
956
00:46:18,297 --> 00:46:19,994
You're worse
than I am.
957
00:46:20,560 --> 00:46:22,344
Are you going
to push me off?
958
00:46:22,736 --> 00:46:24,172
I thought
you trusted me.
959
00:46:24,259 --> 00:46:26,000
Here, hold on to
my shoulders. Ready?
960
00:46:26,087 --> 00:46:28,002
Push.
Push against me.
961
00:46:28,089 --> 00:46:30,222
Oh! Isn't
that exciting?
962
00:46:30,309 --> 00:46:32,833
-I can't stop!
-[laughs]
963
00:46:34,226 --> 00:46:35,836
Come here.
964
00:46:38,708 --> 00:46:40,275
♪ Ta-da ♪
965
00:46:40,362 --> 00:46:41,929
My boat.
966
00:46:42,016 --> 00:46:43,365
-[Maria] Oh, it's great.
-[Larry] Yeah.
967
00:46:43,452 --> 00:46:44,671
[Maria]
I mean, it could be great.
968
00:46:44,758 --> 00:46:45,933
Shecould be great.
969
00:46:46,325 --> 00:46:48,066
You always refer
to a boat as a female.
970
00:46:48,153 --> 00:46:49,371
Why?
971
00:46:49,458 --> 00:46:50,851
Well, I guess if
you're some
972
00:46:50,938 --> 00:46:52,287
sweaty sailor out
at sea for a year,
973
00:46:52,374 --> 00:46:53,985
you need to use
your imagination.
974
00:46:54,855 --> 00:46:56,857
What are you going
to do with she?
975
00:46:58,337 --> 00:46:59,599
I'm gonna fix her up
976
00:46:59,686 --> 00:47:01,949
and I'm gonna sail off
into the sunset.
977
00:47:02,950 --> 00:47:05,170
You have a rich
fantasy life, don't you?
978
00:47:05,257 --> 00:47:06,171
Uh-huh.
979
00:47:07,563 --> 00:47:08,956
Don't you? Don't you
have fantasies?
980
00:47:09,043 --> 00:47:10,262
-I do. I do.
-Yeah?
981
00:47:10,349 --> 00:47:11,611
But they're private.
982
00:47:11,698 --> 00:47:13,395
I don't tell them
to anybody.
983
00:47:13,482 --> 00:47:15,223
[Larry]
Not even a dance teacher?
984
00:47:15,310 --> 00:47:17,399
Mm, you're not just
a dance teacher.
985
00:47:17,965 --> 00:47:20,054
I can't figure it out
what you are.
986
00:47:20,141 --> 00:47:22,013
Hey, isn't that
what everybody wants?
987
00:47:22,535 --> 00:47:24,493
A smooth-sailing life?
988
00:47:25,059 --> 00:47:28,236
You can achieve that
for a minute on a dance floor
989
00:47:28,323 --> 00:47:30,021
or the water.
990
00:47:31,457 --> 00:47:32,458
Look how lovely.
991
00:47:32,545 --> 00:47:34,199
Hmm.
992
00:47:37,550 --> 00:47:39,204
That one would
look great on you.
993
00:47:39,291 --> 00:47:40,553
Oh, Tom hates me in hats.
994
00:47:40,640 --> 00:47:42,816
Then I'll buy it
for you.
995
00:47:43,338 --> 00:47:44,296
No.
996
00:47:46,515 --> 00:47:48,300
But the look
on Tom's face...
997
00:47:50,302 --> 00:47:52,217
We'll take that one
right there.
998
00:47:52,957 --> 00:47:55,133
What does your wife
hate you to wear?
999
00:47:56,438 --> 00:47:58,179
Boxer shorts.
1000
00:47:58,266 --> 00:47:59,615
She doesn't think
they're sexy.
1001
00:47:59,702 --> 00:48:01,269
Oh, I think
they're very sexy.
1002
00:48:03,489 --> 00:48:05,491
We're gonna be bad.
We're gonna be so bad.
1003
00:48:05,578 --> 00:48:08,886
[indistinct chatter]
1004
00:48:11,627 --> 00:48:13,064
Hey. I got him.
1005
00:48:13,151 --> 00:48:15,109
He's gonna buy.
325 loaded--
1006
00:48:15,196 --> 00:48:16,589
chrome wheels,
tinted glass,
1007
00:48:16,676 --> 00:48:18,983
alarm, phone,
wool carpets.
1008
00:48:19,070 --> 00:48:22,116
Two more Beemers,
and I...I win the trip
to Vegas.
1009
00:48:23,422 --> 00:48:25,337
[woman]
I don't even like the color.
I mean, it's just--
1010
00:48:25,424 --> 00:48:27,556
[man]
Look, just sit in it.
Just sit in it.
1011
00:48:27,817 --> 00:48:29,167
I don't like it.
1012
00:48:38,219 --> 00:48:39,177
Hi.
1013
00:48:39,264 --> 00:48:40,265
Hi.
1014
00:48:41,483 --> 00:48:42,963
Listen.
1015
00:48:43,572 --> 00:48:45,096
The beauty
of the Subaru
1016
00:48:45,183 --> 00:48:47,185
is that it is
so cost-efficient
1017
00:48:48,012 --> 00:48:50,492
that I bet a woman like you
could talk him into one for him
1018
00:48:50,579 --> 00:48:52,364
and then one for yourself.
1019
00:48:53,626 --> 00:48:55,149
Do this.
1020
00:48:55,236 --> 00:48:56,455
Let me take you
for a test drive
1021
00:48:56,542 --> 00:48:58,109
in that little blue wagon.
1022
00:49:19,217 --> 00:49:20,305
Hi.
1023
00:49:20,914 --> 00:49:22,350
[Tish] This way.
Now see there?
1024
00:49:22,437 --> 00:49:24,222
Won't it go out
further that way?
1025
00:49:25,353 --> 00:49:26,572
Yeah.
1026
00:49:27,094 --> 00:49:28,052
That's good. You're
really doing that well.
1027
00:49:28,139 --> 00:49:29,401
That's really good.
1028
00:49:29,488 --> 00:49:30,402
I need to
talk to you.
1029
00:49:32,186 --> 00:49:33,622
I'm with a customer.
1030
00:49:33,709 --> 00:49:35,363
But if you're interested
in a makeover,
1031
00:49:35,450 --> 00:49:37,191
you'll have to wait
your turn.
1032
00:49:37,278 --> 00:49:38,453
Now, I want you
to try the dusty rose.
1033
00:49:38,540 --> 00:49:40,151
This is important.
1034
00:49:40,238 --> 00:49:42,240
So is my career.
A line right there--
1035
00:49:42,327 --> 00:49:43,284
Tish.
1036
00:49:43,371 --> 00:49:45,983
I'm with a customer.
1037
00:49:48,594 --> 00:49:50,117
[Tish]
That--that works.
1038
00:49:50,204 --> 00:49:51,292
-Yeah?
-Yeah.
1039
00:49:51,379 --> 00:49:53,294
Yeah. That
definitely works.
1040
00:49:53,381 --> 00:49:55,949
Your husband is
having an affair
with my wife.
1041
00:49:58,691 --> 00:50:00,301
You are insane.
1042
00:50:01,085 --> 00:50:04,349
If I had any idea
how insane you were,
1043
00:50:04,436 --> 00:50:06,612
I would never have
let you start up with me.
1044
00:50:06,699 --> 00:50:08,309
Ha! What?!
1045
00:50:08,396 --> 00:50:10,094
You seduced me!
1046
00:50:12,705 --> 00:50:14,185
I'm sorry.
1047
00:50:14,272 --> 00:50:15,664
Uh, I'll be right back.
1048
00:50:15,751 --> 00:50:17,971
Take your time, honey.
1049
00:50:21,757 --> 00:50:24,543
Your opinion of Larry
is a tribute
1050
00:50:24,630 --> 00:50:27,502
to your insensitivity
to other human beings.
1051
00:50:27,589 --> 00:50:30,244
Larry would
never have sex
1052
00:50:30,331 --> 00:50:32,159
with someone
like your wife.
1053
00:50:32,246 --> 00:50:33,813
Yeah, I'm not
worried about sex.
1054
00:50:33,900 --> 00:50:36,033
I'm worried about them
having a relationship.
1055
00:50:36,685 --> 00:50:38,209
You've ruined my life.
1056
00:50:38,905 --> 00:50:41,473
And you are jeopardizing
my new job here
1057
00:50:41,560 --> 00:50:44,215
as assistant manager
of this department.
1058
00:50:44,302 --> 00:50:47,305
So if you'd like
a private consultation,
1059
00:50:47,392 --> 00:50:49,263
please call
for an appointment.
1060
00:50:49,350 --> 00:50:52,179
and if you ever come here
and upset me again,
1061
00:50:52,266 --> 00:50:54,181
I will have
the security guards
1062
00:50:54,268 --> 00:50:56,401
throw you
out of the store.
1063
00:50:58,664 --> 00:51:00,231
Now where were we?
1064
00:51:00,318 --> 00:51:02,668
-Making the lips fuller.
-Yes.
1065
00:51:03,321 --> 00:51:04,844
So I burned her underwear.
So what? I'll buy her more.
1066
00:51:04,931 --> 00:51:07,325
I mean, can you--?
He's sick. He's a beast.
1067
00:51:07,412 --> 00:51:09,501
How am I supposed to go
anywhere looking like this?
1068
00:51:09,588 --> 00:51:11,807
Well, in some countries,
bald is considered attractive.
1069
00:51:11,894 --> 00:51:13,722
I didn't marry you
for your looks anyway.
1070
00:51:13,809 --> 00:51:15,333
I want a divorce.
1071
00:51:15,420 --> 00:51:16,725
Her and that lowlife
appliance salesman
1072
00:51:17,770 --> 00:51:19,859
-aren't getting a dime.
-He's not a lowlife appliance
salesman!
1073
00:51:19,946 --> 00:51:21,600
Excuse me. Excuse me.
I'm sorry, folks, but
we're very late.
1074
00:51:22,340 --> 00:51:25,212
I had no idea your job
was so dangerous.
1075
00:51:25,299 --> 00:51:26,605
Why are we running?
1076
00:51:26,909 --> 00:51:28,520
How about lunch?
1077
00:51:28,607 --> 00:51:30,435
-I'm not hungry.
-Good.
1078
00:51:32,741 --> 00:51:34,439
[laughs]
1079
00:51:37,790 --> 00:51:39,748
Fish must be
so happy.
1080
00:51:39,835 --> 00:51:41,359
[Larry]
They must be.
1081
00:51:41,446 --> 00:51:44,275
They have mating rituals
like Italian operas.
1082
00:51:45,102 --> 00:51:47,713
I hate to leave,
this was such a great idea.
1083
00:51:47,800 --> 00:51:49,280
Let's call in sick.
1084
00:51:49,367 --> 00:51:51,195
Maggie can
take my classes.
1085
00:51:51,282 --> 00:51:52,500
I can't call in sick.
1086
00:51:52,587 --> 00:51:54,067
Then call in well.
1087
00:51:54,154 --> 00:51:55,895
Tell your boss,
it's too beautiful a day
1088
00:51:55,982 --> 00:51:57,679
to take notes on other
people's problems. Come on.
1089
00:51:57,766 --> 00:51:59,203
I'll call for you.
You want me to?
1090
00:52:00,291 --> 00:52:02,075
I'll call for myself.
1091
00:52:06,775 --> 00:52:09,256
[Larry]
If the lake were to
swallow me up right now,
1092
00:52:09,343 --> 00:52:11,171
I would die
a happy man.
1093
00:52:12,694 --> 00:52:13,913
It's been
a long time
1094
00:52:14,000 --> 00:52:16,089
since I've been
this happy, too.
1095
00:52:17,612 --> 00:52:19,092
Is it just me,
1096
00:52:19,179 --> 00:52:22,313
or do you also have this
uncontrollable desire
1097
00:52:22,400 --> 00:52:24,402
to put our lips together?
1098
00:52:28,580 --> 00:52:29,755
We can't.
1099
00:52:29,842 --> 00:52:30,756
You're right.
1100
00:52:30,843 --> 00:52:33,150
We can't.
1101
00:52:33,585 --> 00:52:35,282
Why can't we?
1102
00:52:37,806 --> 00:52:39,765
Have you ever
cheated on Tish?
1103
00:52:39,852 --> 00:52:42,202
Once.
1104
00:52:42,507 --> 00:52:44,073
In Monopoly.
1105
00:52:44,161 --> 00:52:46,075
I stole all
her good properties
1106
00:52:46,163 --> 00:52:48,252
while she was
doing her nails.
1107
00:52:48,904 --> 00:52:50,384
How about you?
1108
00:52:50,471 --> 00:52:51,994
[Maria]
A Catholic schoolgirl?
1109
00:52:52,081 --> 00:52:53,518
-Yeah.
-No.
1110
00:52:55,824 --> 00:52:58,175
So what will
happen to us?
1111
00:52:58,871 --> 00:53:00,525
Well, we could be
lovers,
1112
00:53:00,612 --> 00:53:02,266
or we could be
friends.
1113
00:53:02,353 --> 00:53:03,832
We are friends.
1114
00:53:03,919 --> 00:53:06,270
If we're lovers,
1115
00:53:06,357 --> 00:53:07,880
we have to lie.
1116
00:53:07,967 --> 00:53:10,317
I don't think
I can do that.
1117
00:53:10,404 --> 00:53:12,189
Yeah. Me either.
1118
00:53:13,755 --> 00:53:15,409
We could make love once
1119
00:53:15,496 --> 00:53:17,281
and then never
see each other again.
1120
00:53:17,368 --> 00:53:18,369
Hmm.
1121
00:53:23,765 --> 00:53:25,550
Friends, then.
1122
00:53:25,898 --> 00:53:27,682
Very special friends.
1123
00:53:28,379 --> 00:53:31,469
Oh, Tom and Tish will be
insane with jealousy.
1124
00:53:31,556 --> 00:53:32,600
So what?
1125
00:53:32,687 --> 00:53:33,819
Who cares?
1126
00:53:33,906 --> 00:53:35,386
We're gonna
be innocent.
1127
00:53:35,473 --> 00:53:37,736
We'll be this
great couple.
1128
00:53:37,823 --> 00:53:40,913
Years from now, we'll be in the
Guinness Book of Records.
1129
00:53:41,000 --> 00:53:42,915
"20 years,"
people will say,
1130
00:53:43,002 --> 00:53:44,960
"and they never had sex."
1131
00:53:45,047 --> 00:53:47,659
"You're kidding me."
"No. It's true."
1132
00:53:47,746 --> 00:53:49,617
And all those years,
1133
00:53:49,704 --> 00:53:52,620
I'll be dreaming
of kissing you.
1134
00:53:53,926 --> 00:53:55,580
With tongue
or without?
1135
00:53:56,929 --> 00:53:59,192
How about just one?
1136
00:53:59,845 --> 00:54:01,368
Friends?
1137
00:54:01,455 --> 00:54:03,370
Remember.
1138
00:54:03,457 --> 00:54:05,285
What do you do
on the weekend?
1139
00:54:06,112 --> 00:54:07,679
I spend as much time
as I can with Chloe.
1140
00:54:08,549 --> 00:54:10,856
Tom loves to go to
restaurants he cannot afford,
1141
00:54:10,943 --> 00:54:12,553
then complains
all through dinner.
1142
00:54:13,772 --> 00:54:14,860
Bye.
1143
00:54:14,947 --> 00:54:16,557
Bye.
1144
00:54:17,689 --> 00:54:19,212
Hey!
1145
00:54:19,299 --> 00:54:21,345
Hey, let's pretend to meet
at a restaurant.
1146
00:54:25,000 --> 00:54:26,698
Saturday night?
1147
00:54:26,785 --> 00:54:28,395
I'll bring my father.
1148
00:54:30,789 --> 00:54:32,486
[Larry]
Mario's. 9:00.
1149
00:54:35,881 --> 00:54:37,535
Did you let it breathe?
1150
00:54:37,622 --> 00:54:40,277
Sir, I personally
gave it mouth-to-mouth.
1151
00:54:45,978 --> 00:54:47,632
Excellent.
1152
00:54:48,241 --> 00:54:49,938
Does anyone
ever send it back?
1153
00:54:50,025 --> 00:54:52,332
Not the house wine, sir.
1154
00:55:03,038 --> 00:55:04,649
Look who's here.
1155
00:55:05,911 --> 00:55:06,955
Hey, look who's here.
1156
00:55:07,042 --> 00:55:08,479
What a coincidence.
1157
00:55:08,566 --> 00:55:09,523
Hi.
1158
00:55:09,871 --> 00:55:11,395
Come join us.
1159
00:55:11,482 --> 00:55:12,787
Yes. By all means.
1160
00:55:12,874 --> 00:55:14,963
Really? Well,
what do you think?
1161
00:55:15,050 --> 00:55:17,531
That'd be fun. What do you
say? Yeah, that'd be great.
1162
00:55:21,013 --> 00:55:22,623
I've always
wanted to come here.
1163
00:55:23,363 --> 00:55:25,496
What are those,
children's portions?
1164
00:55:25,583 --> 00:55:27,324
The flowers are
bigger than the food.
1165
00:55:28,281 --> 00:55:29,543
Could we get some
more wine over here, please?
1166
00:55:30,762 --> 00:55:33,634
Look at all these
self-satisfied pigs
stuffing themselves.
1167
00:55:34,069 --> 00:55:35,723
People are starving.
1168
00:55:35,810 --> 00:55:36,985
Mitch.
1169
00:55:37,551 --> 00:55:38,944
You know, I really wish
someone with an Uzi
1170
00:55:39,031 --> 00:55:40,815
would walk in here
and take all this jewelry
1171
00:55:40,902 --> 00:55:42,600
everyone's showing off.
1172
00:55:42,687 --> 00:55:44,819
They're just symbols
of a sick society.
1173
00:55:44,906 --> 00:55:47,648
Hey, I started out pumping gas
when I was your age.
1174
00:55:47,735 --> 00:55:49,694
Now I own
a string of stations.
1175
00:55:49,781 --> 00:55:52,044
And that can only happen
in this society.
1176
00:55:52,131 --> 00:55:53,915
Please make them
stop, Larry.
1177
00:55:54,002 --> 00:55:56,527
Oh, I think everybody's
entitled to their own opinion.
1178
00:55:56,614 --> 00:55:57,919
-Don't you, Edie?
-Oh, yes.
1179
00:55:58,006 --> 00:55:59,747
As long as they
agree with mine.
1180
00:55:59,834 --> 00:56:01,532
[laughs]
1181
00:56:07,755 --> 00:56:09,453
So how you like
this wine, Vince?
1182
00:56:10,454 --> 00:56:11,803
Let me put it to you this way.
I'd rather have a case
of the clap
1183
00:56:11,890 --> 00:56:13,370
than a case of this wine.
1184
00:56:14,806 --> 00:56:16,547
Oh, boy.
1185
00:56:17,243 --> 00:56:19,027
[Vince]
See these prices here?
1186
00:56:19,114 --> 00:56:22,683
I think Phil would have
wanted you to take us out
to dinner.
1187
00:56:22,770 --> 00:56:26,600
I think Phil would have wanted
you and me to split it.
1188
00:56:29,690 --> 00:56:30,735
To Phil.
1189
00:56:30,822 --> 00:56:31,779
Yeah.
1190
00:56:31,866 --> 00:56:32,867
To Phil.
1191
00:56:32,954 --> 00:56:34,521
[all]
To Phil.
1192
00:56:40,919 --> 00:56:42,355
[scoffs]
1193
00:56:42,921 --> 00:56:44,401
Excuse me.
1194
00:56:46,141 --> 00:56:47,795
What's wrong with her?
1195
00:56:47,882 --> 00:56:49,362
I don't know.
1196
00:56:49,449 --> 00:56:50,668
She went to
the ladies' room. I will go.
1197
00:56:50,755 --> 00:56:52,496
No, Mama. I'll go.
1198
00:57:00,112 --> 00:57:02,723
[sobbing]
1199
00:57:04,595 --> 00:57:05,857
Tish?
1200
00:57:07,075 --> 00:57:08,250
Open up.
1201
00:57:08,337 --> 00:57:09,730
[Tish] Go away.
1202
00:57:09,817 --> 00:57:11,645
Come on. Let me in.
1203
00:57:12,080 --> 00:57:13,821
[Tish]
Please leave me alone.
1204
00:57:18,609 --> 00:57:19,610
Tish?
1205
00:57:20,741 --> 00:57:23,178
You bought him those
terrible boxer shorts,
didn't you?
1206
00:57:23,483 --> 00:57:25,050
I didn't mean
anything by it.
1207
00:57:25,137 --> 00:57:27,139
It was just a joke.
1208
00:57:27,226 --> 00:57:29,968
Tom said you were
having an affair,
1209
00:57:30,055 --> 00:57:31,709
but I didn't believe him
1210
00:57:31,796 --> 00:57:34,451
until I saw how you
looked at each other.
1211
00:57:35,321 --> 00:57:37,584
We're not
having an affair.
1212
00:57:37,671 --> 00:57:39,586
We've been playing
a little game
1213
00:57:39,673 --> 00:57:41,545
to get back
at you and Tom.
1214
00:57:42,633 --> 00:57:44,591
It's just gone too far.
1215
00:57:44,678 --> 00:57:45,940
I'm sorry.
1216
00:57:46,027 --> 00:57:47,725
She's so nice.
1217
00:57:48,856 --> 00:57:50,597
She's so nice.
1218
00:57:53,861 --> 00:57:54,819
[Larry] Tish.
1219
00:57:56,777 --> 00:57:58,692
Here, go get us some
ice cream, Mitchie.
1220
00:57:58,779 --> 00:57:59,867
But I don't want
to miss anything.
1221
00:57:59,954 --> 00:58:00,999
Ice cream!
1222
00:58:01,565 --> 00:58:02,783
Please get us some
ice cream, Mitchie.
1223
00:58:02,870 --> 00:58:03,784
Don't talk to him
like that.
1224
00:58:07,005 --> 00:58:07,962
Tish.
1225
00:58:08,049 --> 00:58:09,790
Tish, wait a minute.
1226
00:58:09,877 --> 00:58:11,966
-Son.
-What?
1227
00:58:12,401 --> 00:58:14,795
-Are you bedding
that woman?
-Tish?
1228
00:58:15,404 --> 00:58:16,928
Well, Christ, son,
I hope you're bedding
your own wife.
1229
00:58:17,015 --> 00:58:17,929
No, the other one. Maria.
1230
00:58:18,016 --> 00:58:19,670
No, Pop, I'm not.
1231
00:58:19,757 --> 00:58:21,715
Well, you sure as hell
act like it, both of you.
1232
00:58:21,802 --> 00:58:23,717
Well, I'm not.
We're just friends.
1233
00:58:24,109 --> 00:58:25,980
Well, then, get
your house in order.
1234
00:58:26,067 --> 00:58:28,766
Pop, if you don't
stop bossing
people around...
1235
00:58:28,853 --> 00:58:30,158
You know that tall building
over there?
1236
00:58:30,245 --> 00:58:31,595
It's called a Hilton.
1237
00:58:32,204 --> 00:58:33,553
[Larry] Tish.
1238
00:58:35,120 --> 00:58:36,861
Tish. Come on, sweetheart.
1239
00:58:37,775 --> 00:58:40,691
Tish, come on. You're making
a big deal out of nothing.
1240
00:58:41,082 --> 00:58:42,823
Tish, open up.
1241
00:58:43,258 --> 00:58:45,739
Come on, sweetheart.
1242
00:58:46,479 --> 00:58:48,481
Listen, you're not doing
anything stupid in there,
are you?
1243
00:58:50,091 --> 00:58:52,616
Oh. Hi.
1244
00:58:54,922 --> 00:58:57,490
Oh, we haven't seen
this outfit for a while,
have we?
1245
00:58:59,231 --> 00:59:01,668
You sure you don't want
to talk about this, huh?
1246
00:59:02,016 --> 00:59:03,931
I guess not.
1247
00:59:04,018 --> 00:59:05,933
[door opens]
1248
00:59:06,020 --> 00:59:08,066
Phil? Oh, God.
1249
00:59:08,153 --> 00:59:10,503
What's happening?
Hmm?
1250
00:59:13,027 --> 00:59:14,855
What?
1251
00:59:14,942 --> 00:59:17,162
Oh. Great, you think I'm
too young to talk about sex?
1252
00:59:17,249 --> 00:59:18,903
Is that it?
1253
00:59:18,990 --> 00:59:20,252
You know,
I've had sex.
1254
00:59:20,339 --> 00:59:21,819
Yeah.
Sure you have.
1255
00:59:21,906 --> 00:59:23,037
I have.
1256
00:59:23,124 --> 00:59:24,865
She was 300 pounds.
1257
00:59:24,952 --> 00:59:26,954
And when I was
up on top of her,
1258
00:59:27,041 --> 00:59:29,740
I was so high, my arms and legs
didn't even touch the bed.
1259
00:59:30,697 --> 00:59:32,264
And when she breathed,
I flew up and down
1260
00:59:32,351 --> 00:59:33,787
like I was on
a trampoline.
1261
00:59:35,920 --> 00:59:37,791
Why the hell you make up
all this nonsense?
1262
00:59:38,836 --> 00:59:40,272
I'm a multimedia
artist.
1263
00:59:40,359 --> 00:59:41,795
That's what I do.
I make up nonsense.
1264
00:59:41,882 --> 00:59:42,927
Wow.
1265
00:59:47,540 --> 00:59:48,933
Do you
still have sex?
1266
00:59:49,020 --> 00:59:50,587
Rarely.
1267
00:59:52,284 --> 00:59:53,198
Do you miss it?
1268
00:59:53,285 --> 00:59:54,895
Yeah. Oh, God.
1269
00:59:55,592 --> 00:59:57,637
Then why don't you
have it?
1270
01:00:00,118 --> 01:00:02,599
I've just been thinking
the same thing.
1271
01:00:06,864 --> 01:00:09,780
[wedding march chimes]
1272
01:00:18,963 --> 01:00:21,139
Smile. Good.
1273
01:00:21,400 --> 01:00:23,097
Welcome
to Weddingland.
1274
01:00:23,184 --> 01:00:26,057
And which joyous event
will you be attending?
1275
01:00:26,144 --> 01:00:27,711
Uh, Kozinski.
1276
01:00:27,798 --> 01:00:29,103
The crystal gazebo.
1277
01:00:29,190 --> 01:00:31,802
A right, then a left.
1278
01:00:31,889 --> 01:00:33,760
Dusty, will you
take them?
1279
01:00:36,850 --> 01:00:38,460
Macintosh.
1280
01:00:38,547 --> 01:00:40,375
The pink rose castle.
1281
01:00:40,462 --> 01:00:44,249
♪ Isn't it romantic?
Music in the night ♪
1282
01:00:44,336 --> 01:00:46,207
♪ A dream
That can be heard ♪
1283
01:00:46,294 --> 01:00:48,253
♪ Isn't it romantic? ♪
1284
01:00:48,340 --> 01:00:52,605
♪ Morning shadows write
The oldest magic word ♪
1285
01:00:52,953 --> 01:00:54,259
Kiss.
1286
01:00:54,346 --> 01:00:57,001
♪ I hear the breezes playing ♪
1287
01:00:57,088 --> 01:00:58,872
Hey, good shot, Mitch.
1288
01:01:00,091 --> 01:01:02,963
Okay, together.
Let me see the gut.
Let me see the gut. Hey!
1289
01:01:03,050 --> 01:01:05,226
No x-rated pictures,
you bad boy.
1290
01:01:05,313 --> 01:01:07,881
Weddings are
joyful occasions.
1291
01:01:07,968 --> 01:01:10,057
They're Pagan rituals, okay?
1292
01:01:10,144 --> 01:01:11,929
He's got it under control,
here, Aunt Sofia.
1293
01:01:12,016 --> 01:01:14,148
I had a good shot.
She's stifling art.
1294
01:01:14,235 --> 01:01:15,889
Edie.
1295
01:01:15,976 --> 01:01:17,238
How are you?
1296
01:01:17,848 --> 01:01:20,067
Is that a dress
you wear to a wedding?
1297
01:01:20,154 --> 01:01:22,243
-I made it.
My own design.
-Oh.
1298
01:01:22,330 --> 01:01:24,245
-See you later.
-Bye.
1299
01:01:24,985 --> 01:01:27,858
That's a dress you wear
to a hooker's wedding.
1300
01:01:27,945 --> 01:01:29,163
Good to see you
again, Edie.
1301
01:01:29,250 --> 01:01:30,382
Hi, Vince.
1302
01:01:30,469 --> 01:01:32,645
-Sofia.
-How do you do?
1303
01:01:34,168 --> 01:01:35,779
How are you?
1304
01:02:04,459 --> 01:02:06,157
-Howdy.
-Hey.
1305
01:02:19,605 --> 01:02:23,870
♪ A time for us
Someday there'll be ♪
1306
01:02:23,957 --> 01:02:26,090
♪ When chains are torn ♪
1307
01:02:26,177 --> 01:02:27,091
Ah!
1308
01:02:28,266 --> 01:02:29,789
Speak up.
1309
01:02:31,269 --> 01:02:35,012
♪ A time
When dreams deny ♪
1310
01:02:36,404 --> 01:02:37,971
That is a
beautiful dress.
1311
01:02:38,058 --> 01:02:40,017
Here's looking
at you, kid.
1312
01:02:40,321 --> 01:02:41,845
Weddings really
turn me on.
1313
01:02:44,238 --> 01:02:45,762
Oh, yeah.
1314
01:02:46,458 --> 01:02:48,025
Music going
all the time.
1315
01:02:49,330 --> 01:02:50,854
I can't live
without music.
1316
01:02:50,941 --> 01:02:52,464
Look at her.
1317
01:02:53,117 --> 01:02:56,250
Look at her. It's not enough
she killed the first one.
1318
01:02:56,729 --> 01:02:59,906
Now she's out
to kill the brother, too.
1319
01:03:00,167 --> 01:03:01,908
The kiss of death.
1320
01:03:04,432 --> 01:03:05,651
You're a sight
for sore eyes.
1321
01:03:05,738 --> 01:03:07,174
You know that,
don't you?
1322
01:03:07,784 --> 01:03:10,090
I am an old
lonely woman.
1323
01:03:10,177 --> 01:03:11,526
My life is over.
1324
01:03:11,613 --> 01:03:14,007
I try to be a good
grandmother now.
1325
01:03:14,094 --> 01:03:16,227
I'm thinking
of making jam.
1326
01:03:17,315 --> 01:03:19,012
I like your shoes.
1327
01:03:19,099 --> 01:03:21,754
It shows off your
bubblegum toes.
1328
01:03:22,450 --> 01:03:24,191
What was I saying?
1329
01:03:24,713 --> 01:03:26,585
Giving me that crap
about being old.
1330
01:03:26,672 --> 01:03:30,154
♪ A world of shining hope
For you and me ♪
1331
01:03:30,241 --> 01:03:32,330
[announcer]
Ladies and gentlemen,
1332
01:03:32,417 --> 01:03:35,115
at this time, we're so happy to
bring on the dance floor
1333
01:03:35,202 --> 01:03:39,903
for their first dance,
Mr. and Mrs. Dean Kozinski!
1334
01:03:40,904 --> 01:03:44,255
♪ See the stone
Set in your eyes ♪
1335
01:03:44,342 --> 01:03:48,825
♪ See the thorn
Twist in your side ♪
1336
01:03:49,216 --> 01:03:51,131
♪ I'll wait... ♪
1337
01:03:51,740 --> 01:03:53,960
-Dance with me.
-Sure.
1338
01:03:54,047 --> 01:03:56,441
-What?
-Huh?
1339
01:03:56,528 --> 01:03:58,095
Somebody
dance with me.
1340
01:03:58,182 --> 01:03:59,139
Sure. Yeah.
1341
01:03:59,226 --> 01:04:01,098
What are you--?
1342
01:04:01,185 --> 01:04:04,057
♪ And you give
Yourself away... ♪
1343
01:04:05,015 --> 01:04:06,451
♪ And you give ♪
1344
01:04:06,538 --> 01:04:08,540
♪ And you give ♪
1345
01:04:08,627 --> 01:04:12,718
♪ And you give
Yourself away ♪
1346
01:04:12,805 --> 01:04:16,722
♪ With or without you ♪
1347
01:04:16,809 --> 01:04:20,682
♪ With or without you ♪
1348
01:04:20,769 --> 01:04:26,471
♪ I can't live ♪
1349
01:04:26,558 --> 01:04:29,866
♪ With or without you ♪
1350
01:04:32,216 --> 01:04:34,479
♪ Ah ♪
1351
01:04:34,566 --> 01:04:36,307
Go dance with your wife.
1352
01:04:36,394 --> 01:04:39,832
♪ Ah ♪
1353
01:04:40,615 --> 01:04:43,183
♪ Ah ♪
1354
01:04:48,580 --> 01:04:51,191
♪ With or without you ♪
1355
01:04:52,453 --> 01:04:56,283
♪ With or without you ♪
1356
01:04:57,154 --> 01:04:59,243
-♪ I can't live ♪
-Why don't we go for a walk?
1357
01:05:01,680 --> 01:05:05,466
♪ With or without you ♪
1358
01:05:05,553 --> 01:05:08,992
♪ With or without you ♪
1359
01:05:15,215 --> 01:05:17,217
The marriage business
is sure booming.
1360
01:05:19,263 --> 01:05:20,873
Business is right.
1361
01:05:28,533 --> 01:05:30,665
Would you and your wife
like a piece of cake?
1362
01:05:30,752 --> 01:05:33,320
Oh, thank you,
but she's not my wife.
1363
01:05:33,973 --> 01:05:36,106
In that case, can I have
your phone number?
1364
01:05:36,845 --> 01:05:38,195
-[woman] What are you doing?
-Kidding!
1365
01:05:38,282 --> 01:05:40,023
-Congratulations.
-Thank you. I'm kidding.
1366
01:05:41,938 --> 01:05:45,071
What do you think
we would be like as
a married couple?
1367
01:05:45,158 --> 01:05:46,159
Horrendous.
1368
01:05:46,246 --> 01:05:46,855
Awful.
1369
01:05:47,856 --> 01:05:50,294
Oh, sure. First you'd
find me witty, charming,
1370
01:05:50,381 --> 01:05:53,079
fall in love with those cute
sounds I make in the morning.
1371
01:05:53,166 --> 01:05:55,038
Then about three months,
1372
01:05:55,125 --> 01:05:58,084
you'd want to smother me
with a pillow because
I talk too much.
1373
01:05:58,171 --> 01:06:00,173
Oh, no.
I love our talks.
1374
01:06:00,260 --> 01:06:03,002
Well, we talk now
because we're not married.
1375
01:06:05,613 --> 01:06:08,094
-[Tish] They're in love.
-[Tom] They're not in love.
1376
01:06:08,181 --> 01:06:09,182
They are.
1377
01:06:09,661 --> 01:06:11,445
And it's our fault.
1378
01:06:11,532 --> 01:06:13,056
I'm out.
1379
01:06:13,143 --> 01:06:14,144
They're not in love.
1380
01:06:14,231 --> 01:06:15,406
Here.
1381
01:06:15,493 --> 01:06:17,364
Have some of mine.
1382
01:06:17,756 --> 01:06:19,540
Why are you
being nice to me?
1383
01:06:19,627 --> 01:06:20,846
To make them
jealous, right?
1384
01:06:20,933 --> 01:06:22,282
I've always
been nice to you.
1385
01:06:24,197 --> 01:06:25,372
Never.
1386
01:06:25,459 --> 01:06:27,418
Then how come
you had sex with me?
1387
01:06:28,462 --> 01:06:31,422
'Cause I thought you were
intelligent and going
somewhere with your life,
1388
01:06:31,509 --> 01:06:34,686
Ha! But I've had cause
to reconsider my first opinion.
1389
01:06:34,773 --> 01:06:37,254
I'm goin' somewhere.
You think I'm going to
sell Subarus forever?
1390
01:06:37,341 --> 01:06:39,386
Plus, I have a lot of
deep thoughts.
1391
01:06:40,257 --> 01:06:43,086
I just have a hard time
talking to women.
1392
01:06:43,782 --> 01:06:45,392
Well, you're talking to me.
1393
01:06:46,741 --> 01:06:48,352
You're different.
1394
01:06:49,483 --> 01:06:50,528
How?
1395
01:06:50,615 --> 01:06:52,443
I don't know.
Different.
1396
01:06:53,574 --> 01:06:55,185
Different than Maria.
1397
01:07:02,366 --> 01:07:04,020
Maria's...
1398
01:07:04,542 --> 01:07:05,978
Too good for me.
1399
01:07:07,719 --> 01:07:09,721
You know, if Larry
got a good job
1400
01:07:09,808 --> 01:07:11,549
and he stopped playing
that trumpet,
1401
01:07:11,636 --> 01:07:13,290
I could be happy.
1402
01:07:13,899 --> 01:07:15,944
And you know, I wouldn't be
attracted to someone like you.
1403
01:07:16,032 --> 01:07:17,642
-What the hell does that mean,
"someone like me"?
-[groans]
1404
01:07:17,729 --> 01:07:19,731
♪ Hi ho the derry-o ♪
1405
01:07:19,818 --> 01:07:21,341
♪ The bride cuts the cake ♪
1406
01:07:21,428 --> 01:07:23,387
♪ The bride cuts the cake♪
1407
01:07:23,474 --> 01:07:25,258
♪ The bride cuts the cake ♪
1408
01:07:25,345 --> 01:07:27,478
Hey, buddy,
where you been, huh?
1409
01:07:27,565 --> 01:07:29,175
-Where've you been?
-Where the hell's my wife?
1410
01:07:29,262 --> 01:07:30,394
-I don't know.
-Oh, Tommy--
1411
01:07:30,481 --> 01:07:31,917
Where's Maria?
Have you seen her?
1412
01:07:32,004 --> 01:07:33,179
Don't worry about her, Tommy.
Come on.
1413
01:07:33,614 --> 01:07:34,572
[woman]
Come watch them cut the cake.
1414
01:07:35,573 --> 01:07:36,791
Let's go cut the cake. That's
an idea. Let's go cut the cake.
1415
01:07:36,878 --> 01:07:38,489
Somebody stop him.
Stop him!
1416
01:07:39,446 --> 01:07:40,404
[woman screams]
1417
01:07:40,491 --> 01:07:42,058
[screams]
1418
01:07:47,715 --> 01:07:49,500
Mama, the cake!
1419
01:07:49,587 --> 01:07:51,545
I know, don't--
I know.
1420
01:07:51,632 --> 01:07:52,764
[Edie] You go straight.
1421
01:07:52,851 --> 01:07:53,895
[Maria]
Mama, you open the door.
1422
01:07:53,982 --> 01:07:55,288
[Edie]
You go straight.
1423
01:08:07,431 --> 01:08:10,303
Sweetheart, are you going
to be sick again?
1424
01:08:10,390 --> 01:08:11,478
Mm-mmm.
1425
01:08:11,565 --> 01:08:13,176
Lie still, dear.
1426
01:08:14,307 --> 01:08:15,700
I'll get a Hefty bag.
1427
01:08:15,961 --> 01:08:18,006
Can I use the phone
to call a cab?
1428
01:08:18,094 --> 01:08:20,270
Don't be ridiculous.
Take my car.
1429
01:08:20,357 --> 01:08:21,662
I'll stay here tonight.
1430
01:08:21,749 --> 01:08:22,924
You can bring it
back tomorrow,
1431
01:08:23,011 --> 01:08:25,231
with a full tank of gas.
1432
01:08:25,971 --> 01:08:28,016
I'll bring it back tomorrow
on one condition--
1433
01:08:28,104 --> 01:08:29,496
to pick you up
to have dinner.
1434
01:08:29,975 --> 01:08:32,760
Vince, we are
not compatible.
1435
01:08:32,847 --> 01:08:35,067
Oh, come on, dinner.
1436
01:08:35,415 --> 01:08:36,460
On me?
1437
01:08:38,679 --> 01:08:40,377
All right.
1438
01:08:40,464 --> 01:08:42,422
You've made an old man
very happy.
1439
01:08:42,509 --> 01:08:43,902
You are not so old.
1440
01:08:43,989 --> 01:08:46,339
Yeah, I know.
And I'm not so happy.
1441
01:09:03,835 --> 01:09:05,532
He'll be fine.
1442
01:09:05,619 --> 01:09:08,666
This is so crazy.
We haven't done anything.
1443
01:09:08,753 --> 01:09:10,233
They think we have.
1444
01:09:19,372 --> 01:09:20,634
We have to stop.
1445
01:09:20,721 --> 01:09:22,245
I know.
1446
01:09:24,508 --> 01:09:25,683
It's so unfair.
1447
01:09:26,336 --> 01:09:28,425
You've become
my best friend.
1448
01:09:32,864 --> 01:09:34,518
But you know,
1449
01:09:34,605 --> 01:09:36,607
married men and women
are only allowed
1450
01:09:36,694 --> 01:09:39,131
to be close friends
in large groups.
1451
01:09:42,613 --> 01:09:43,788
For Tish.
1452
01:09:43,875 --> 01:09:45,355
Ah.
1453
01:09:51,883 --> 01:09:53,450
[car starts]
1454
01:09:54,712 --> 01:09:56,453
I'm gonna miss you.
1455
01:10:06,463 --> 01:10:08,029
Mitch, don't do that.
1456
01:10:08,116 --> 01:10:09,640
It's so cool.
1457
01:10:09,727 --> 01:10:10,858
Just don't.
1458
01:10:10,945 --> 01:10:13,339
-Feeling better?
-Mmm.
1459
01:10:13,861 --> 01:10:15,428
Do you want me
to leave?
1460
01:10:16,386 --> 01:10:17,604
No.
1461
01:10:17,996 --> 01:10:19,650
I will if you
want me to.
1462
01:10:20,955 --> 01:10:23,480
I've always
liked you so much.
1463
01:10:24,132 --> 01:10:26,222
I like you, too.
1464
01:10:27,397 --> 01:10:30,313
I was almost unfaithful
to your father once.
1465
01:10:30,400 --> 01:10:31,836
I knew this was coming.
1466
01:10:31,923 --> 01:10:33,838
He was a barber.
1467
01:10:33,925 --> 01:10:36,362
He looked just like
John Forsythe,
1468
01:10:36,449 --> 01:10:37,711
only bald.
1469
01:10:37,798 --> 01:10:39,409
And Italian.
1470
01:10:40,627 --> 01:10:42,150
I'm not sleeping
with Larry.
1471
01:10:42,238 --> 01:10:44,065
But you are
thinking about it.
1472
01:10:44,152 --> 01:10:46,154
He makes me feel good.
1473
01:10:46,242 --> 01:10:48,069
We talk. We walk.
We have fun.
1474
01:10:48,156 --> 01:10:49,810
What's so wrong?
1475
01:10:49,897 --> 01:10:52,683
This walk you are taking
is right into quicksand.
1476
01:10:52,770 --> 01:10:55,163
I haven't been happy
with Tom in a long time.
1477
01:10:55,251 --> 01:10:57,427
Who says you're supposed
to be happy?
1478
01:10:57,688 --> 01:10:58,950
Oh, excuse me.
1479
01:10:59,037 --> 01:11:01,387
I dare to want
to be happy.
1480
01:11:02,606 --> 01:11:05,565
As my mother,
pace l'anima sua,
used to say,
1481
01:11:05,652 --> 01:11:08,916
"Primo alla famiglia
e dopo il piacere."
1482
01:11:09,003 --> 01:11:11,702
Why always my problems
have to be solved
with proverbs?
1483
01:11:11,789 --> 01:11:13,486
You have a nice home
and a beautiful child.
1484
01:11:13,573 --> 01:11:15,009
[Maria]
An unfaithful husband.
1485
01:11:15,096 --> 01:11:16,402
That doesn't mean he
doesn't love you.
1486
01:11:16,489 --> 01:11:17,708
It just means he's stupid.
1487
01:11:17,795 --> 01:11:18,926
I think Tom,
in his own way,
1488
01:11:19,013 --> 01:11:20,711
wanted to get caught
1489
01:11:20,798 --> 01:11:22,495
because he's
unhappy, too.
1490
01:11:22,582 --> 01:11:25,542
Well, you-- I just want
to ask you a question.
1491
01:11:25,629 --> 01:11:28,284
And then I'll shut up
and mind my own business.
1492
01:11:29,328 --> 01:11:31,678
Are you really ready
to change your entire life
1493
01:11:31,765 --> 01:11:33,680
and the life of those
close to you
1494
01:11:33,767 --> 01:11:35,378
for a dance teacher?
1495
01:11:37,031 --> 01:11:38,816
Until you are sure,
1496
01:11:38,903 --> 01:11:41,384
don't do anything
you'll regret.
1497
01:12:32,739 --> 01:12:34,350
Sorry.
1498
01:13:08,079 --> 01:13:09,646
Don't move!
1499
01:14:26,636 --> 01:14:27,680
Ohh!
1500
01:14:27,767 --> 01:14:28,681
Whoa!
1501
01:14:28,768 --> 01:14:29,813
Whoa!
1502
01:14:30,640 --> 01:14:31,554
Aah!
1503
01:14:31,641 --> 01:14:32,729
Aah!
1504
01:14:36,994 --> 01:14:38,648
Moo.
1505
01:14:39,126 --> 01:14:41,085
Yeah. Moo.
1506
01:14:41,172 --> 01:14:42,565
[cows moo]
1507
01:14:42,652 --> 01:14:43,696
Moo.
1508
01:14:44,828 --> 01:14:46,438
Moo.
1509
01:14:49,833 --> 01:14:50,921
Oak Lane?
1510
01:14:52,052 --> 01:14:53,619
Round the bend.
1511
01:14:54,402 --> 01:14:55,969
Are you happy?
1512
01:14:56,056 --> 01:14:57,580
About what?
1513
01:15:07,241 --> 01:15:09,940
[man on TV]
Now, what we've been involved
in here in the greens
1514
01:15:10,027 --> 01:15:12,725
is to try to form
and to lay out...
1515
01:15:12,812 --> 01:15:14,466
Hello.
1516
01:15:14,553 --> 01:15:16,947
We'd like to, uh, rent one
of your cottages, please.
1517
01:15:17,034 --> 01:15:18,862
For how long?
1518
01:15:20,820 --> 01:15:22,039
Uh...
1519
01:15:22,692 --> 01:15:24,781
Just for the afternoon,
thanks.
1520
01:15:28,001 --> 01:15:29,568
It's nice.
1521
01:15:46,280 --> 01:15:48,152
The fireplace works.
1522
01:15:48,239 --> 01:15:50,633
No room service, but the cafe
off the highway delivers.
1523
01:15:50,720 --> 01:15:52,069
Menu's by the phone.
1524
01:15:52,809 --> 01:15:55,638
Oh, and yes,
the paintings
are for sale.
1525
01:15:59,076 --> 01:16:00,773
Well...
1526
01:16:00,860 --> 01:16:01,905
I love it.
1527
01:16:04,908 --> 01:16:06,562
Nervous?
1528
01:16:07,258 --> 01:16:08,781
Mm-hmm.
1529
01:16:08,868 --> 01:16:10,000
Me, too.
1530
01:16:23,274 --> 01:16:24,710
Oh, shit!
1531
01:16:24,797 --> 01:16:25,972
We broke the lamp.
1532
01:16:30,324 --> 01:16:33,197
I've wanted to do
something like that
my entire life!
1533
01:16:33,284 --> 01:16:34,894
[laughs]
1534
01:16:37,375 --> 01:16:39,638
Oh, look,
your lip's bleeding.
1535
01:16:42,075 --> 01:16:43,686
I bit my lip.
1536
01:16:45,165 --> 01:16:46,863
Round three.
1537
01:17:57,237 --> 01:17:58,978
What's this?
1538
01:17:59,631 --> 01:18:01,851
They're all yours, Mitchie.
1539
01:18:01,938 --> 01:18:03,940
I'm going for the real thing.
1540
01:18:06,377 --> 01:18:07,987
♪ I'm a love man ♪
1541
01:18:08,074 --> 01:18:10,903
Samurai hair stylist.
Yaah!
1542
01:18:10,990 --> 01:18:12,470
Hyah!
1543
01:18:12,557 --> 01:18:14,167
Jeez, I hope you know
what you're doing.
1544
01:18:15,255 --> 01:18:17,257
♪ That's what they call me
I'm a love man ♪
1545
01:18:17,823 --> 01:18:19,129
Don't know why
I let you do this.
1546
01:18:19,216 --> 01:18:22,132
♪ 6'1", weight 210 ♪
1547
01:18:22,219 --> 01:18:25,483
♪ Long hair
And pretty fair skin ♪
1548
01:18:25,570 --> 01:18:28,399
♪ Long legs,
And I'm all out of sight ♪
1549
01:18:28,486 --> 01:18:31,881
♪ Hey, little girl,
I'm goin' to take you out ♪
1550
01:18:31,968 --> 01:18:33,273
♪ 'Cause I'm a love man ♪
1551
01:18:33,926 --> 01:18:36,712
♪ That's what they call me
I'm a love man ♪
1552
01:18:38,496 --> 01:18:40,977
♪ Make love to you
In the morning, girl ♪
1553
01:18:41,064 --> 01:18:44,023
♪ Make love to you
At night, now ♪
1554
01:18:44,110 --> 01:18:47,331
♪ Make love to you
When you think about it ♪
1555
01:18:47,418 --> 01:18:50,029
♪ I wanna make sure
Everything all right ♪
1556
01:18:50,116 --> 01:18:52,162
♪ 'Cau-'cau-'cau-'cau-
'Cause I'm a love man ♪
1557
01:18:53,467 --> 01:18:55,382
♪ Ooh, baby,
I'm a love man ♪
1558
01:18:55,469 --> 01:18:58,342
♪ That's what they call me
I'm a love man ♪
1559
01:18:58,995 --> 01:19:01,998
♪ Baby, here comes
The love man ♪
1560
01:19:04,000 --> 01:19:07,003
♪ 6'1", weight 210 ♪
1561
01:19:07,090 --> 01:19:10,049
♪ Long hair
And pretty fair skin... ♪
1562
01:19:15,359 --> 01:19:18,275
Mandarin egg rolls,
shrimp cocktail,
1563
01:19:18,362 --> 01:19:20,320
turkey club sandwich,
1564
01:19:20,407 --> 01:19:23,367
and lox with scrambled eggs.
1565
01:19:23,454 --> 01:19:25,282
-Oh, and a chocolate cake.
-Oh, yeah.
1566
01:19:25,369 --> 01:19:26,936
So what do you want?
1567
01:19:28,328 --> 01:19:29,590
French fries.
1568
01:19:29,677 --> 01:19:31,114
Oh, and French fries,
please.
1569
01:19:31,201 --> 01:19:32,506
-With lots of ketchup.
-Lots of ketchup.
1570
01:19:32,593 --> 01:19:35,205
Oh, and wait, do you have
any champagne?
1571
01:19:35,292 --> 01:19:36,467
Oh, yeah.
1572
01:19:36,554 --> 01:19:39,165
Oh, great. Oh!
And please hurry.
1573
01:19:39,252 --> 01:19:40,819
Tha-thank you.
1574
01:19:41,951 --> 01:19:43,779
[knock on door]
1575
01:19:44,214 --> 01:19:45,737
That was quick.
1576
01:19:46,390 --> 01:19:47,478
Yes?
1577
01:19:47,565 --> 01:19:49,045
[woman]
It's the maid.
1578
01:19:49,132 --> 01:19:50,742
Would you like
the bed turned down?
1579
01:19:51,961 --> 01:19:53,005
Uh, no, thank you.
1580
01:19:57,183 --> 01:19:58,924
I better call home.
1581
01:20:00,012 --> 01:20:04,016
Closer. Closer still.
1582
01:20:04,103 --> 01:20:05,452
Aah!
1583
01:20:05,539 --> 01:20:07,280
Closer still.
1584
01:20:07,367 --> 01:20:08,934
Aah!
1585
01:20:09,282 --> 01:20:11,023
...Ser still.
1586
01:20:11,502 --> 01:20:13,286
I'll be with her
till Tom gets home.
1587
01:20:13,373 --> 01:20:15,811
Don't worry.
Where are you?
1588
01:20:16,463 --> 01:20:18,074
Can I speak
to Chloe, Mama?
1589
01:20:21,077 --> 01:20:23,166
Hi, sweetheart.
How was school today?
1590
01:20:25,124 --> 01:20:26,909
Leonard Pearson
scratched you?
1591
01:20:26,996 --> 01:20:28,345
But this is awful.
1592
01:20:28,432 --> 01:20:29,868
Are you all right?
1593
01:20:32,175 --> 01:20:33,916
I'm gonna be home
a little late tonight.
1594
01:20:35,439 --> 01:20:36,527
Why?
1595
01:20:37,049 --> 01:20:39,051
Because I'm seeing
some friends.
1596
01:20:39,138 --> 01:20:40,923
But I'll be home
to kiss you good night.
1597
01:20:43,360 --> 01:20:45,057
Be a good girl
for daddy.
1598
01:20:46,189 --> 01:20:47,799
I love you.
1599
01:20:53,631 --> 01:20:55,198
I had to lie
to my daughter.
1600
01:21:57,260 --> 01:21:59,262
I'll bet this
is the first one
she ever sold.
1601
01:21:59,349 --> 01:22:00,306
Mm.
1602
01:22:01,220 --> 01:22:03,092
It's late.
1603
01:22:03,831 --> 01:22:05,485
I'm sorry
I fell asleep.
1604
01:22:05,790 --> 01:22:07,357
I fell asleep, too.
1605
01:22:08,532 --> 01:22:11,187
Does falling asleep
mean we've finally
gotten each other
1606
01:22:11,274 --> 01:22:12,884
out of our system?
1607
01:22:13,319 --> 01:22:14,364
No.
1608
01:22:14,451 --> 01:22:17,019
It means we were
both tired.
1609
01:22:24,287 --> 01:22:25,897
I'd better go.
1610
01:22:27,159 --> 01:22:28,900
I'll call you tomorrow.
1611
01:23:23,346 --> 01:23:25,174
[creaking]
1612
01:23:56,640 --> 01:23:58,294
Your office called.
1613
01:23:59,730 --> 01:24:01,123
Because you called in sick,
1614
01:24:01,558 --> 01:24:02,298
they wanted to know
if you were all right.
1615
01:24:03,603 --> 01:24:04,648
Are you all right?
1616
01:24:04,735 --> 01:24:06,171
Tom.
1617
01:24:07,085 --> 01:24:10,219
If, um, I hadn't acted
like an idiot,
1618
01:24:10,306 --> 01:24:11,481
would this have happened?
1619
01:24:11,568 --> 01:24:13,091
You were just
being you.
1620
01:24:16,616 --> 01:24:19,228
Sometimes a man
thinks he has
to prove himself
1621
01:24:19,315 --> 01:24:20,272
by being with a lot of women.
1622
01:24:20,359 --> 01:24:21,491
Tom...
1623
01:24:22,144 --> 01:24:23,754
If you're going to tell me
about your infidelities,
1624
01:24:23,841 --> 01:24:26,104
I will have to
leave you forever.
1625
01:24:35,722 --> 01:24:37,202
Oh, uh...
1626
01:24:37,637 --> 01:24:40,031
Chloe's teacher
would like to talk to you.
1627
01:24:50,259 --> 01:24:51,390
Are you in love with him?
1628
01:24:55,873 --> 01:24:58,310
If I am,
I'll get over it.
1629
01:24:58,789 --> 01:25:00,182
Yeah.
1630
01:25:02,097 --> 01:25:04,055
We were in love
once upon a time.
1631
01:25:04,882 --> 01:25:06,231
We got over it.
1632
01:25:38,568 --> 01:25:40,352
[telephone rings]
1633
01:25:42,441 --> 01:25:43,486
[groans]
1634
01:25:45,792 --> 01:25:47,359
Yeah. Yeah.
1635
01:25:47,446 --> 01:25:49,100
You go near
my wife again,
1636
01:25:49,753 --> 01:25:51,363
and I'll kill you.
1637
01:26:04,681 --> 01:26:05,682
Hey, Pop.
1638
01:26:05,769 --> 01:26:07,597
What's the matter?
1639
01:26:07,684 --> 01:26:11,078
My brother Phil just
called me from the grave.
1640
01:26:11,166 --> 01:26:13,472
He said to stay away
from Edie,
1641
01:26:13,559 --> 01:26:15,126
or he'd kill me.
1642
01:26:16,432 --> 01:26:17,781
You were dreaming, Pop.
1643
01:26:17,868 --> 01:26:19,391
No.
1644
01:26:20,044 --> 01:26:22,351
But she doesn't
want me anyway.
1645
01:26:22,960 --> 01:26:24,701
Doesn't think
we're compatible.
1646
01:26:24,788 --> 01:26:26,311
No. Don't do that.
1647
01:26:26,398 --> 01:26:28,226
Let me make you
breakfast.
1648
01:26:32,622 --> 01:26:34,319
Hi.
1649
01:26:34,928 --> 01:26:37,366
I'm not leaving
because I'm angry,
or mad, or anything.
1650
01:26:39,716 --> 01:26:42,501
I want you to be free
to make up your mind.
1651
01:26:42,588 --> 01:26:43,676
Where are you going?
1652
01:26:43,763 --> 01:26:45,765
My mom's.
1653
01:26:46,375 --> 01:26:48,551
I'll have the rest of my
clothes picked up later.
1654
01:26:49,813 --> 01:26:51,031
Your mother
gives you hives.
1655
01:26:51,118 --> 01:26:52,424
Wh-what are you doing?
1656
01:26:52,859 --> 01:26:55,253
Not this time.
It's time I face up to her.
1657
01:26:56,602 --> 01:26:59,475
See, I'm not as dumb
as you think.
1658
01:26:59,562 --> 01:27:01,390
I think you're the smartest
person around here.
1659
01:27:02,042 --> 01:27:03,870
Now, wait a minute.
Shouldn't we be
talking about this?
1660
01:27:03,957 --> 01:27:05,437
No, I've made up
my mind.
1661
01:27:05,524 --> 01:27:06,743
Well, at least let me
help you here.
1662
01:27:06,830 --> 01:27:08,484
You can help me
get a cab.
1663
01:27:15,099 --> 01:27:17,275
So how did your
big date go last night?
1664
01:27:18,972 --> 01:27:20,670
Can you keep a secret?
1665
01:27:22,411 --> 01:27:23,542
Yeah, sure.
1666
01:27:23,629 --> 01:27:25,370
So can I.
1667
01:27:32,812 --> 01:27:34,249
You...
1668
01:27:36,816 --> 01:27:38,427
Mrs. Davidow, hello.
1669
01:27:38,775 --> 01:27:39,776
Hello, Mrs. Hardy.
1670
01:27:40,037 --> 01:27:41,473
Good morning, Chloe.
1671
01:27:41,778 --> 01:27:43,258
-Did you want to talk to me?
-Mm-hmm.
1672
01:27:43,345 --> 01:27:44,520
Would you take over
for a while, Elaine?
1673
01:27:45,999 --> 01:27:47,827
I'm concerned
about Chloe's arm.
1674
01:27:47,914 --> 01:27:49,786
-She has a scratch.
She said that--
-Excuse me!
1675
01:27:49,873 --> 01:27:51,788
She said that
Leonard Pearson
did it to her.
1676
01:27:51,875 --> 01:27:55,444
You know, it's time for us
to do some serious sharing
1677
01:27:55,531 --> 01:27:58,185
and interfacing
about Chloe,
Mrs. Hardy.
1678
01:27:58,273 --> 01:28:00,492
Can I offer you
a cup of decaf?
1679
01:28:01,058 --> 01:28:02,407
So what do you think?
This is beautiful or what?
1680
01:28:02,494 --> 01:28:04,583
Isn't it gorgeous?
Isn't it great?
1681
01:28:04,670 --> 01:28:06,803
Leather, the whole thing.
What do you say we go
for a ride?
1682
01:28:06,890 --> 01:28:08,065
I'll go grab the keys, huh?
1683
01:28:09,066 --> 01:28:10,676
Come on, come on.
I'll get the keys,
I'll be right back.
1684
01:28:11,068 --> 01:28:13,288
This is it.
I can feel it.
1685
01:28:13,375 --> 01:28:14,854
I can smell it. I'm telling
you, I'm taking them
for a test-drive.
1686
01:28:14,941 --> 01:28:16,160
Do you hear
what I'm saying?
1687
01:28:16,247 --> 01:28:17,509
I know it.
I sell this Beemer,
1688
01:28:17,596 --> 01:28:18,902
I'm off to Vegas.
I'm goin', man.
1689
01:28:18,989 --> 01:28:21,252
I got 'em. I got 'em.
Got 'em. Got 'em!
1690
01:28:26,518 --> 01:28:29,260
Oh, my God, my God.
1691
01:28:33,786 --> 01:28:36,049
Yo, Mel, can you
open up that window?
1692
01:28:36,136 --> 01:28:38,748
Wanna take the 750
for a test drive?
1693
01:28:38,835 --> 01:28:41,011
Can I tantalize you with
something in the meantime?
1694
01:28:41,098 --> 01:28:42,534
I'm here
to see Tom.
1695
01:28:42,926 --> 01:28:44,493
[man] A mistake,
but I'll be right back.
1696
01:28:47,670 --> 01:28:48,714
Hi.
1697
01:28:50,150 --> 01:28:54,416
So... you're
finally buying a car.
1698
01:28:55,808 --> 01:28:57,680
Thinking about it.
1699
01:28:58,289 --> 01:28:59,682
Hey, I'll see you later.
I'll be right back.
1700
01:28:59,769 --> 01:29:01,292
Got it definitely
under control.
1701
01:29:05,688 --> 01:29:06,732
I left Larry.
1702
01:29:08,038 --> 01:29:09,692
[crash]
1703
01:29:09,779 --> 01:29:12,869
[man] Are you crazy,
you stupid shit?
1704
01:29:12,956 --> 01:29:14,479
Get that piece of...
1705
01:29:14,566 --> 01:29:15,872
[Tish]
That was really great.
1706
01:29:15,959 --> 01:29:17,482
[Tom]
It was great.
1707
01:29:17,569 --> 01:29:19,397
[Tish]
It wasn't sogreat.
1708
01:29:19,484 --> 01:29:21,704
[Tom]
What are you talking about?
It was great.
1709
01:29:22,052 --> 01:29:23,575
[Tish]
No, it was different.
1710
01:29:23,662 --> 01:29:27,187
Well, it's different
in a bed.
1711
01:29:27,274 --> 01:29:29,886
No, it's not the bed.
1712
01:29:29,973 --> 01:29:31,714
It's different.
1713
01:29:32,192 --> 01:29:33,716
You're different.
1714
01:29:35,892 --> 01:29:39,678
Well, it's different
now that you're, um...
1715
01:29:39,765 --> 01:29:41,506
Now that I'm what?
1716
01:29:41,593 --> 01:29:43,726
Now that you're, uh...
1717
01:29:44,074 --> 01:29:45,554
on your own.
1718
01:29:46,511 --> 01:29:50,820
Oh, my God. I just
realized something.
1719
01:29:50,907 --> 01:29:53,866
You're one of those men
who can only do this
1720
01:29:53,953 --> 01:29:55,302
because you're married.
1721
01:29:55,390 --> 01:29:56,739
You're not interested
in anyone
1722
01:29:57,435 --> 01:29:59,916
-that you'd have to have
some responsibility--
-Calm down!
1723
01:30:00,003 --> 01:30:02,919
You know, I'm up for
a new position
in the fashion office
1724
01:30:03,006 --> 01:30:06,792
and I took time out
today because I thought
that maybe you'd--
1725
01:30:06,879 --> 01:30:08,620
You thought that
maybe I'd what?
1726
01:30:08,707 --> 01:30:11,623
Nothing. There's a run
in my panty hose.
1727
01:30:11,710 --> 01:30:13,538
[Tom]
What's the matter with you?
1728
01:30:13,625 --> 01:30:16,933
I'm being tested
and punished
1729
01:30:17,020 --> 01:30:18,717
for my stupidity.
1730
01:30:18,804 --> 01:30:20,676
Oh, I deserve this.
1731
01:30:32,949 --> 01:30:34,646
She looks much better.
1732
01:30:35,168 --> 01:30:37,475
Hey, what
a great surprise.
1733
01:30:37,997 --> 01:30:40,739
I had no idea how much
I loved sanding.
1734
01:30:41,261 --> 01:30:43,176
Is sandpapering
going to be
your next job?
1735
01:30:43,263 --> 01:30:44,656
I don't think so.
1736
01:30:44,743 --> 01:30:46,702
No, I was thinking
that you and me
1737
01:30:46,789 --> 01:30:48,791
ought to open
a restaurant some place.
1738
01:30:49,922 --> 01:30:51,054
Why, do you cook?
1739
01:30:51,141 --> 01:30:53,535
No, but I do dishes.
1740
01:30:55,188 --> 01:30:57,060
A restaurant where?
1741
01:30:57,147 --> 01:30:58,844
Somewhere where
we could hang a sign
1742
01:30:58,931 --> 01:31:01,717
that says "gone sailing"
anytime we want.
1743
01:31:02,979 --> 01:31:04,328
And people
would understand?
1744
01:31:04,415 --> 01:31:05,895
"Understand"?
Are you kidding me?
1745
01:31:05,982 --> 01:31:07,505
People will approve.
1746
01:31:08,332 --> 01:31:12,554
And what about
your son? Wife?
1747
01:31:13,685 --> 01:31:15,948
Mitch goes
to spend next term
1748
01:31:16,035 --> 01:31:17,733
with his mother
in San Francisco,
1749
01:31:17,820 --> 01:31:18,995
then college.
1750
01:31:19,082 --> 01:31:21,127
Tish, I don't know
what she wants,
1751
01:31:21,214 --> 01:31:22,738
but it certainly
isn't me.
1752
01:31:29,135 --> 01:31:30,702
It must be beautiful
out there.
1753
01:31:36,186 --> 01:31:37,753
Does that mean
you're gonna come along?
1754
01:31:40,930 --> 01:31:45,282
Chloe has been lying
about a boy attacking her
1755
01:31:45,369 --> 01:31:48,677
when actually she has been
beating on him.
1756
01:31:50,113 --> 01:31:54,030
But the teacher thinks
she's acting out
her anger toward Tom.
1757
01:31:54,117 --> 01:31:55,771
Oh...
1758
01:31:56,336 --> 01:31:59,601
The other day
she put a cat
in the school dryer.
1759
01:32:01,907 --> 01:32:04,040
The teacher thinks,
um...
1760
01:32:04,127 --> 01:32:07,130
it's because she doesn't
get enough attention,
1761
01:32:07,217 --> 01:32:11,569
'cause I'm not doing
a good enough job.
1762
01:32:12,309 --> 01:32:14,616
No. Now kids
go through stages.
1763
01:32:22,798 --> 01:32:24,756
My husband
and my daughter need me.
1764
01:32:31,110 --> 01:32:32,634
And us?
1765
01:32:35,027 --> 01:32:37,987
Us? Well, we do what
generally people do...
1766
01:32:41,120 --> 01:32:42,861
Go on with their lives.
1767
01:32:47,387 --> 01:32:49,955
Maybe people aren't
supposed to be happy.
1768
01:32:50,521 --> 01:32:52,610
No, I don't
believe that.
1769
01:32:58,094 --> 01:32:59,835
I came to say goodbye.
1770
01:33:00,270 --> 01:33:01,837
I know.
1771
01:33:03,099 --> 01:33:04,709
Have you
been crying?
1772
01:33:07,233 --> 01:33:08,800
I have.
1773
01:33:10,410 --> 01:33:12,761
I have been crying
a lot lately.
1774
01:33:15,154 --> 01:33:17,809
I'm making up for all
these years I didn't.
1775
01:33:23,293 --> 01:33:24,947
I'm fine.
1776
01:33:27,906 --> 01:33:30,735
And I'm only sorry
we never had
a chance to dance.
1777
01:33:45,837 --> 01:33:47,273
You all got to be crazy!
1778
01:33:47,360 --> 01:33:48,971
Pop, please, I've got
enough problems.
1779
01:33:49,058 --> 01:33:50,276
Go home.
I'll call you.
1780
01:33:50,755 --> 01:33:52,365
Larry, Larry, just listen
to me for once.
1781
01:33:52,452 --> 01:33:53,845
If you love that woman
the way I think you do,
1782
01:33:54,454 --> 01:33:56,065
sometimes in life you gotta
fight to the death.
1783
01:33:56,152 --> 01:33:58,067
I am familiar with
this philosophy, Pop.
1784
01:33:58,154 --> 01:34:00,417
I believe it's Attila the Hun
who said it first.
1785
01:34:00,504 --> 01:34:02,158
Yeah? Well this is what
your father Vincent Kozinski
is saying first,
1786
01:34:02,245 --> 01:34:04,073
last, and always.
1787
01:34:04,551 --> 01:34:07,772
You've got only
one life to live.
1788
01:34:07,859 --> 01:34:09,165
You can either
make it chicken shit
1789
01:34:09,252 --> 01:34:10,949
or chicken salad.
1790
01:34:27,879 --> 01:34:29,098
Good chops.
1791
01:34:30,273 --> 01:34:31,100
I'm glad
you like them.
1792
01:34:31,187 --> 01:34:32,144
My favorite.
1793
01:34:32,231 --> 01:34:33,929
I know.
1794
01:34:34,016 --> 01:34:35,060
Thanks.
1795
01:34:35,147 --> 01:34:36,975
You're welcome.
1796
01:34:44,026 --> 01:34:45,680
Maybe, um...
1797
01:34:47,899 --> 01:34:49,771
We can make love later.
1798
01:34:51,860 --> 01:34:52,948
Good.
1799
01:36:39,228 --> 01:36:40,838
Thank you.
1800
01:36:44,363 --> 01:36:45,843
[sighs]
1801
01:37:45,163 --> 01:37:47,383
Phil always said there was
a future in garbage.
1802
01:37:47,470 --> 01:37:49,341
I just never thought
it would be my future.
1803
01:37:49,428 --> 01:37:51,517
You were very generous in your
business dealings, Vince.
1804
01:37:51,604 --> 01:37:52,736
Very generous.
1805
01:37:52,823 --> 01:37:54,216
Now, don't let it
get around.
1806
01:37:54,303 --> 01:37:56,087
You're not
such a tough guy.
1807
01:37:57,741 --> 01:37:59,482
A tough guy might've
made a pass at you.
1808
01:37:59,569 --> 01:38:01,136
But not you!
1809
01:38:02,006 --> 01:38:04,226
Well, I'd say I got
this big empty house
in the country.
1810
01:38:04,313 --> 01:38:07,272
Come and visit me
and we can celebrate.
1811
01:38:07,664 --> 01:38:10,319
I'd say I am too old
for traveling.
1812
01:38:16,455 --> 01:38:17,848
[Edie squeals]
1813
01:38:23,071 --> 01:38:24,986
I love you, Edie.
1814
01:38:26,291 --> 01:38:27,858
My God.
1815
01:38:45,397 --> 01:38:47,225
[Sofia]
All right. All right.
1816
01:38:47,312 --> 01:38:49,184
Auntie Sofia.
1817
01:38:49,271 --> 01:38:50,576
[Sofia]
Poor angel, poor angel.
1818
01:38:50,663 --> 01:38:53,188
Okay. Okay, okay.
1819
01:38:54,450 --> 01:38:56,365
You still want
to kill people?
1820
01:38:56,452 --> 01:38:58,497
No, they're
too stupid.
1821
01:38:58,584 --> 01:39:01,065
You're telling me.
Your grandfather's
about to marry
1822
01:39:01,152 --> 01:39:02,937
the Bermuda Triangle.
1823
01:39:09,421 --> 01:39:12,294
Oh, that's very good news.
Very good.
1824
01:39:12,772 --> 01:39:14,949
God bless you.
1825
01:39:18,648 --> 01:39:20,084
[Tom]
Hi, Vince.
1826
01:39:22,391 --> 01:39:23,740
-Father.
-A pleasure.
1827
01:39:23,827 --> 01:39:25,263
Uh, you know my son,
I'm sure, huh?
1828
01:39:25,350 --> 01:39:26,351
Yeah, nice to
see you again.
1829
01:39:29,833 --> 01:39:32,053
-Hi.
-Hi.
1830
01:39:32,531 --> 01:39:33,619
You're late.
1831
01:39:33,706 --> 01:39:35,143
You've met Kathy,
haven't you?
1832
01:39:35,230 --> 01:39:36,579
Kathy,
this is Tish.
1833
01:39:36,666 --> 01:39:38,102
Hi.
1834
01:39:38,189 --> 01:39:40,235
Hi. It's nice
to meet you.
1835
01:39:41,453 --> 01:39:43,586
What? What?
1836
01:39:43,673 --> 01:39:45,980
Start! Start!
1837
01:39:54,205 --> 01:39:56,033
It's too late.
I did it.
1838
01:39:56,860 --> 01:39:59,080
Look at those kids.
They're cute.
1839
01:40:33,201 --> 01:40:35,029
Here we go.
1840
01:40:40,382 --> 01:40:41,383
[dog barks]
1841
01:41:04,797 --> 01:41:08,497
Vincent, will you
take this woman
to be your wife?
1842
01:41:08,801 --> 01:41:10,325
Yeah. Can I kiss her?
1843
01:41:10,412 --> 01:41:11,587
Not yet.
1844
01:41:12,066 --> 01:41:14,590
-Say, "I will."
-[Vincent] I will.
1845
01:41:14,677 --> 01:41:17,506
[priest]
Edie, will you take this man
to be your husband?
1846
01:41:19,595 --> 01:41:21,249
I will.
1847
01:41:21,336 --> 01:41:22,685
Vincent and Edie,
you have made
1848
01:41:22,772 --> 01:41:24,600
this solemn covenant
of marriage
1849
01:41:24,687 --> 01:41:26,471
before God
and this company.
1850
01:41:26,863 --> 01:41:29,257
Always follow
your bliss.
1851
01:41:29,344 --> 01:41:31,824
Always follow
what your heart says.
1852
01:41:31,911 --> 01:41:35,306
I now pronounce you
man and wife.
1853
01:41:35,872 --> 01:41:38,222
You may kiss the bride.
1854
01:41:47,318 --> 01:41:49,451
[applause]
1855
01:41:49,538 --> 01:41:52,367
At this point,
ladies and gentlemen,
we need the assistance
1856
01:41:52,454 --> 01:41:54,325
of a volunteer
from the audience.
Somebody--
1857
01:41:54,412 --> 01:41:56,501
-Hey, me!
-who wouldn't mind
lending us a hand...
1858
01:41:56,588 --> 01:41:57,763
Sit, sit, sit!
1859
01:41:57,850 --> 01:41:59,330
or perhaps
his whole body--
1860
01:41:59,417 --> 01:42:00,592
And I think we
have one here.
1861
01:42:00,679 --> 01:42:01,898
Hi, how are you, sir?
1862
01:42:01,985 --> 01:42:03,726
-What's your name?
-Uh, Stan.
1863
01:42:03,813 --> 01:42:05,771
Hi. Uh, Stan, we're going
to ask you to remove
your jacket
1864
01:42:05,858 --> 01:42:07,512
if you wouldn't mind,
1865
01:42:07,599 --> 01:42:09,514
and Michelle will help you
off with it there.
1866
01:42:10,080 --> 01:42:11,777
Another girl
in here, huh?
1867
01:42:12,474 --> 01:42:13,953
Try not to be funnier
than the magician,
would you, Stan?
1868
01:42:14,040 --> 01:42:16,304
Just lie down,
make yourself comfortable.
1869
01:42:17,000 --> 01:42:18,436
We don't have to stay
here, darling.
1870
01:42:18,523 --> 01:42:19,959
I'm fine.
1871
01:42:20,046 --> 01:42:21,874
I don't want you
to feel uncomfortable.
1872
01:42:21,961 --> 01:42:23,528
Why would I feel
uncomfortable?
1873
01:42:23,615 --> 01:42:25,530
I mean, uh,
I'm not if you're not.
1874
01:42:25,617 --> 01:42:27,141
Okay.
1875
01:42:28,490 --> 01:42:30,666
And... easy, boy.
1876
01:42:30,753 --> 01:42:31,797
Okay. Here we go.
1877
01:42:31,884 --> 01:42:33,277
-Ready?
-Oh, yeah. Oh!
1878
01:42:33,364 --> 01:42:34,539
That's good, yeah.
1879
01:42:34,626 --> 01:42:36,628
Congratulations
on your promotion.
1880
01:42:36,715 --> 01:42:39,370
It agrees with you.
You never looked more
beautiful.
1881
01:42:39,457 --> 01:42:40,632
Thank you.
1882
01:42:40,719 --> 01:42:42,330
I've redone
the apartment.
1883
01:42:42,417 --> 01:42:44,897
It's sort of post-modern
meets the Jetsons.
1884
01:42:44,984 --> 01:42:46,290
You should come
and see it sometime.
1885
01:42:46,377 --> 01:42:47,378
I will.
1886
01:42:47,987 --> 01:42:49,424
I'm good now.
I'm good.
1887
01:42:51,339 --> 01:42:52,557
And don't go away.
1888
01:42:55,473 --> 01:42:57,345
-You want a drink?
-No, thank you.
1889
01:42:57,432 --> 01:42:58,607
-I'm going to get a drink.
-All right.
1890
01:43:01,044 --> 01:43:04,265
[magician]
We're going to show
you something really puzzling.
1891
01:43:10,053 --> 01:43:11,533
I'm sorry.
1892
01:43:11,620 --> 01:43:13,535
Larry, do you know
why I married you?
1893
01:43:13,883 --> 01:43:16,146
My money?
1894
01:43:16,581 --> 01:43:17,843
Your eyes.
1895
01:43:17,930 --> 01:43:19,280
I thought a man
with your eyes
1896
01:43:19,367 --> 01:43:21,151
would never hurt
a woman.
1897
01:43:21,586 --> 01:43:22,544
Have I?
1898
01:43:24,676 --> 01:43:26,200
No.
1899
01:43:27,418 --> 01:43:29,159
Good luck, Larry.
1900
01:43:29,812 --> 01:43:31,335
Thank you.
1901
01:43:40,736 --> 01:43:42,477
[magician]
And now what
we're going to do now
1902
01:43:42,564 --> 01:43:44,174
we'll introduce you
to a little friend of mine.
1903
01:43:44,740 --> 01:43:46,350
Sammy the Saw.
1904
01:43:47,743 --> 01:43:49,397
Oh, you want
to go home?
1905
01:43:49,484 --> 01:43:51,573
Good. Let's talk to Daddy.
We'll go home, okay?
1906
01:43:51,660 --> 01:43:53,575
Hey, he didn't have that
much to begin with.
1907
01:43:57,883 --> 01:44:00,582
[man]
Oh, ho. Hold on, wait.
1908
01:44:01,365 --> 01:44:04,586
You know, I came
this close to having her.
1909
01:44:08,590 --> 01:44:09,591
Ha!
1910
01:44:19,035 --> 01:44:21,429
-Now, that was fantastic.
-Well, we're not finished yet.
1911
01:44:21,516 --> 01:44:22,778
Put him together later on.
1912
01:44:22,865 --> 01:44:23,909
I want to dance
with my wife.
1913
01:44:23,996 --> 01:44:25,389
Give us a waltz,
huh?
1914
01:45:02,470 --> 01:45:04,254
They look so sweet.
1915
01:45:31,586 --> 01:45:32,630
Hi.
1916
01:45:34,676 --> 01:45:35,677
Hi.
1917
01:45:36,460 --> 01:45:38,462
Tell your story
walking, Larry.
1918
01:45:42,074 --> 01:45:43,685
Maria, would you
dance with me?
1919
01:45:44,686 --> 01:45:45,600
No. She won't.
1920
01:45:45,687 --> 01:45:46,731
Please stop.
1921
01:45:46,818 --> 01:45:48,516
Larry, no.
1922
01:45:49,865 --> 01:45:52,650
Well, then how about spending
the rest of your life with me?
1923
01:45:52,737 --> 01:45:54,304
What are you
talking about?
1924
01:45:54,391 --> 01:45:55,914
You know, I haven't hit
another human being
1925
01:45:56,001 --> 01:45:57,829
since the eighth grade,
but if you want to fight,
1926
01:45:57,916 --> 01:45:59,222
I will fight.
1927
01:45:59,309 --> 01:46:00,615
-Please, please, please!
-Fine.
1928
01:46:02,573 --> 01:46:03,792
What's going on here?
1929
01:46:03,879 --> 01:46:04,967
Pop, please, will ya?
1930
01:46:05,533 --> 01:46:06,969
I'm trying to make
a little chicken salad
1931
01:46:07,056 --> 01:46:08,492
out of chicken shit here.
1932
01:46:08,579 --> 01:46:10,755
Maria, everyone
is looking.
1933
01:46:10,842 --> 01:46:12,627
Wait a minute.
1934
01:46:12,714 --> 01:46:14,846
I've kept my part
of the bargain
for Chloe's sake.
1935
01:46:14,933 --> 01:46:17,675
Well, maybe Chloe deserves
more than a bargain, Tom.
1936
01:46:18,763 --> 01:46:20,591
You come and
get in the car
with me right now,
1937
01:46:20,678 --> 01:46:22,593
or I'm leaving you
for good.
1938
01:46:38,914 --> 01:46:41,482
Larry Kozinski,
I would love to dance with you.
1939
01:47:34,796 --> 01:47:37,712
-Dance, please,
everybody, dance.
-Dance!
1940
01:47:37,973 --> 01:47:40,497
I'm taking
my present back.
1941
01:48:19,057 --> 01:48:20,581
Yoo-hoo!
1942
01:48:29,764 --> 01:48:30,895
Mitch!
1943
01:48:30,982 --> 01:48:32,070
[Chloe]
Come on, Mitch.
1944
01:48:32,157 --> 01:48:33,724
-Up! Here we go!
-Mitch, come.
1945
01:48:33,811 --> 01:48:34,986
Come on quick,
we gotta leave.
1946
01:48:35,073 --> 01:48:36,858
Come on, please!
1947
01:48:36,945 --> 01:48:38,686
Come on. Hurry up.
1948
01:48:38,773 --> 01:48:39,774
Mitch!
1949
01:48:39,861 --> 01:48:40,905
[Mitch]
Wait, Dad.
1950
01:48:40,992 --> 01:48:43,604
Dad, Dad. Stop it.
1951
01:48:44,256 --> 01:48:46,694
What are you doing?
What are you doing?
1952
01:48:46,781 --> 01:48:47,782
Come on.
124034
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