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1
00:00:18,393 --> 00:00:20,353
Babe, we did it!
Oh, my God, okay.
2
00:00:20,395 --> 00:00:21,580
- Here's another one. You ready?
- Yeah.
3
00:00:21,604 --> 00:00:23,523
"VICE Magazine,"
"'Based on a True Story, '
4
00:00:23,565 --> 00:00:24,649
"real or hoax?
5
00:00:24,691 --> 00:00:25,793
The podcast that's
gripped the nation."
6
00:00:25,817 --> 00:00:26,943
Holy shit.
7
00:00:26,985 --> 00:00:28,361
- Keep going.
- Yep, we got one
8
00:00:28,403 --> 00:00:30,321
from BuzzFeed:
"Top ten moments you can't miss
9
00:00:30,363 --> 00:00:32,198
from 'Based on a True Story.'"
10
00:00:32,240 --> 00:00:34,200
- Love you, BuzzFeed.
- Another amazing one.
11
00:00:34,242 --> 00:00:35,326
"New York Times Magazine,"
12
00:00:35,368 --> 00:00:36,995
"Bill Kristol
and Noam Chomsky debate,
13
00:00:37,037 --> 00:00:39,789
'What does "Based on a True
Story" say about America?'"
14
00:00:39,831 --> 00:00:41,499
It says, the best...
15
00:00:41,541 --> 00:00:43,376
- country ever!
- Oh, my God.
16
00:00:43,418 --> 00:00:46,379
Charli D'Amelio tweeted
"My new favorite obsession!
17
00:00:46,421 --> 00:00:48,214
#basedonatruestory!"
18
00:00:48,256 --> 00:00:49,734
- Who's Charli D'Amelio?
- I loved her
19
00:00:49,758 --> 00:00:51,402
from "Dancing with the Stars."
She won last year...
20
00:00:51,426 --> 00:00:52,528
- Okay.
- But she also has, like,
21
00:00:52,552 --> 00:00:54,429
150 million followers on TikTok,
22
00:00:54,471 --> 00:00:56,014
so we are fucking viral, babe!
23
00:00:56,056 --> 00:00:57,390
Uh-oh, look who's callin' here.
24
00:00:57,432 --> 00:00:59,351
Okay.
Hey, you see the Daily Beast?
25
00:00:59,392 --> 00:01:01,102
Who is the voice
26
00:01:01,144 --> 00:01:03,188
of "Based on a True Story"?
27
00:01:03,229 --> 00:01:05,065
Can you believe that?
28
00:01:05,106 --> 00:01:07,192
Man, we are everywhere.
29
00:01:07,233 --> 00:01:08,526
Right?
30
00:01:08,568 --> 00:01:09,778
How far away are you?
31
00:01:09,819 --> 00:01:12,364
I'm just on Sunset.
I'll see you soon.
32
00:01:13,865 --> 00:01:15,825
- Why did she invite him?
- I don't know.
33
00:01:15,867 --> 00:01:18,119
It's like, if I know someone,
she has to know them too.
34
00:01:18,161 --> 00:01:19,537
My friend has to be her friend.
35
00:01:19,579 --> 00:01:21,390
If I have a plumber, she has
to have the same plumber.
36
00:01:21,414 --> 00:01:23,166
- It's like, fuck off.
- Yeah.
37
00:01:23,208 --> 00:01:25,460
This is gonna be
a fucking great party.
38
00:01:35,053 --> 00:01:36,429
- All right.
- Hi, guys.
39
00:01:36,471 --> 00:01:39,015
- Wow.
- Welcome. Hi.
40
00:01:39,057 --> 00:01:40,600
- Beautiful in here.
- Oh, thank you.
41
00:01:40,642 --> 00:01:42,727
- You look amazing. You're huge.
- Thank you.
42
00:01:42,769 --> 00:01:44,229
- Uh--
- Hi.
43
00:01:44,270 --> 00:01:46,147
- Hi, girls.
- So good to see you.
44
00:01:46,189 --> 00:01:48,733
- You guys look gorgeous.
- This dress--
45
00:01:48,775 --> 00:01:50,568
- Cut two dresses...
- Stop.
46
00:01:50,610 --> 00:01:52,046
- And put it together.
- No, you did not.
47
00:01:52,070 --> 00:01:53,154
- Hi!
- Tory!
48
00:01:53,196 --> 00:01:54,322
- Hi, sis.
- Hello.
49
00:01:54,364 --> 00:01:55,740
Little kid.
50
00:01:55,782 --> 00:01:56,741
You need a sweater.
51
00:01:56,783 --> 00:01:58,326
- Oh, hi.
- No, let it all out.
52
00:01:58,368 --> 00:02:00,912
- How was school?
- I just graduated.
53
00:02:00,954 --> 00:02:03,540
- You look smarter.
- Looking for a place to stay,
54
00:02:03,581 --> 00:02:05,792
you know, before baby comes
and kicks me out.
55
00:02:05,834 --> 00:02:07,394
Oh, my God,
no one is kicking you out.
56
00:02:07,419 --> 00:02:08,878
- Is there food yet?
- Yeah, inside.
57
00:02:08,920 --> 00:02:10,630
- Bye.
- Hi.
58
00:02:10,672 --> 00:02:12,882
- Who's your date?
- Tinder guy.
59
00:02:12,924 --> 00:02:15,844
Uh, no, actually, Bumble guy.
Jacob.
60
00:02:15,885 --> 00:02:17,095
Another fuckfest.
61
00:02:17,137 --> 00:02:18,972
Oh, no,
it's, like, a little early.
62
00:02:19,014 --> 00:02:20,473
- Is it?
- Alcohol?
63
00:02:20,515 --> 00:02:21,599
- Mm-hmm, yes.
- Yeah.
64
00:02:21,641 --> 00:02:23,018
- Yes, yes.
- I see this.
65
00:02:23,059 --> 00:02:23,977
- Bye.
- Holding hands.
66
00:02:24,019 --> 00:02:25,228
Intimate.
67
00:02:26,646 --> 00:02:28,189
I used to hate these things.
68
00:02:28,231 --> 00:02:29,607
I always got outbid.
69
00:02:29,649 --> 00:02:31,276
- Not anymore, babe.
- Not anymore.
70
00:02:31,317 --> 00:02:32,569
Look at this watch.
71
00:02:32,610 --> 00:02:34,529
Ten-day vacation--
Four Seasons in Maui.
72
00:02:34,571 --> 00:02:36,322
Ooh, I like that one.
73
00:02:36,364 --> 00:02:38,175
- What else we got here?
- A little wine tasting
74
00:02:38,199 --> 00:02:39,784
at home?
That would be nice too.
75
00:02:39,826 --> 00:02:41,286
A brick.
76
00:02:41,327 --> 00:02:43,663
- What is that?
- "A single brick salvaged
77
00:02:43,705 --> 00:02:46,833
from the last Manhattan
residence of Edgar Allan Poe"?
78
00:02:46,875 --> 00:02:49,044
A creepy brick owned
by a horror writer?
79
00:02:49,085 --> 00:02:51,212
- I have to have that.
- Early anniversary present?
80
00:02:51,254 --> 00:02:53,506
- That is so mine.
- It's gonna be yours, baby.
81
00:02:53,548 --> 00:02:54,942
- It also works as a weapon.
- Hey, it's my two
82
00:02:54,966 --> 00:02:56,343
favorite people.
83
00:02:57,385 --> 00:02:58,636
- Hey, Matt.
- Hey.
84
00:02:58,678 --> 00:03:01,348
- Hey, Michelle.
- Hey.
85
00:03:01,389 --> 00:03:03,350
I didn't know you were coming.
86
00:03:03,391 --> 00:03:04,768
- Well, surprise.
- Yay.
87
00:03:04,809 --> 00:03:06,394
- Yeah.
- Great. Yeah.
88
00:03:06,436 --> 00:03:09,647
And it's great that you guys--
um, how are you?
89
00:03:09,689 --> 00:03:12,984
You know what?
We are awesome.
90
00:03:13,026 --> 00:03:16,363
Yeah, and we have Nathan
to thank because he set us up.
91
00:03:16,404 --> 00:03:17,781
- Yeah.
- Oh, I--no, I didn't.
92
00:03:17,822 --> 00:03:19,449
I--I definitely didn't
set you up.
93
00:03:19,491 --> 00:03:21,826
No, no, you did.
You did, remember?
94
00:03:21,868 --> 00:03:22,911
I--I said he was hot,
95
00:03:22,952 --> 00:03:25,747
and then you said
he was good people.
96
00:03:25,789 --> 00:03:27,165
Buddy, thanks.
97
00:03:27,207 --> 00:03:28,750
- I owe you.
- I didn't...
98
00:03:28,792 --> 00:03:30,543
Good people?
99
00:03:31,920 --> 00:03:33,880
Oop, excuse me.
100
00:03:33,922 --> 00:03:35,965
Thank you so much.
101
00:03:36,007 --> 00:03:38,385
Oh, my God,
these canapes are amazing.
102
00:03:38,426 --> 00:03:40,136
Ugh, I know.
I've had, like, 17 of them.
103
00:03:40,178 --> 00:03:42,389
Uh...
104
00:03:44,599 --> 00:03:47,185
Uh...
Carlos is here.
105
00:03:47,227 --> 00:03:49,062
Mm, mm-hmm.
106
00:03:49,104 --> 00:03:51,022
Yeah.
107
00:03:51,064 --> 00:03:52,732
You invited Carlos?
108
00:03:52,774 --> 00:03:54,818
Yes.
I want all my friends here.
109
00:03:54,859 --> 00:03:56,319
Oh, my God.
You invite him to, like,
110
00:03:56,361 --> 00:03:58,405
socialize too?
111
00:03:58,446 --> 00:04:00,031
Well, this is the first one,
112
00:04:00,073 --> 00:04:01,408
but Simon doesn't care.
113
00:04:01,449 --> 00:04:02,784
- Hey.
- See?
114
00:04:02,826 --> 00:04:03,785
All good.
115
00:04:03,827 --> 00:04:05,537
You guys are so fucking weird.
116
00:04:07,956 --> 00:04:09,416
Hey, guys.
117
00:04:11,209 --> 00:04:12,419
Bring it in.
118
00:04:12,460 --> 00:04:14,254
Look at these new numbers.
119
00:04:14,295 --> 00:04:16,589
15 million downloads.
120
00:04:16,631 --> 00:04:18,133
That's a lot of fuckin' money.
121
00:04:18,174 --> 00:04:19,551
Yeah, that's a lot of money.
122
00:04:19,592 --> 00:04:20,427
- Like, a million dollars.
- Can you believe that?
123
00:04:20,468 --> 00:04:21,761
Can you believe that?
124
00:04:21,803 --> 00:04:24,097
Yeah, but you know
what the next question is?
125
00:04:24,139 --> 00:04:25,515
How do we make it bigger?
126
00:04:25,557 --> 00:04:27,267
Okay, let's just enjoy
this moment.
127
00:04:27,308 --> 00:04:28,601
We gotta push it.
Look.
128
00:04:28,643 --> 00:04:30,395
I went on a bit
of a deep dive on Reddit.
129
00:04:30,437 --> 00:04:32,897
Okay, 24% of our fans,
130
00:04:32,939 --> 00:04:35,108
they want me to keep talking
about my greatest hits
131
00:04:35,150 --> 00:04:37,610
over and over
like I'm Billy fucking Joel,
132
00:04:37,652 --> 00:04:40,530
but 76%, guess what they want?
133
00:04:40,572 --> 00:04:42,449
- Don't say it.
- Fresh new content,
134
00:04:42,490 --> 00:04:43,450
- motherfuckers.
- No.
135
00:04:43,491 --> 00:04:44,784
- No.
- Yeah. Yeah.
136
00:04:44,826 --> 00:04:45,845
We're not talking
about that anymore.
137
00:04:45,869 --> 00:04:47,138
- They said it.
- Faking it worked
138
00:04:47,162 --> 00:04:48,413
pretty good in Vegas.
139
00:04:48,455 --> 00:04:49,330
The fake was great.
It was great.
140
00:04:49,372 --> 00:04:50,665
It was a one-time thing.
141
00:04:50,707 --> 00:04:51,624
- How 'bout a two-time thing?
- It was great.
142
00:04:51,666 --> 00:04:52,584
- Why?
- No, we've gotten listen
143
00:04:52,625 --> 00:04:54,753
to our 15-million fanbase,
144
00:04:54,794 --> 00:04:56,296
and we gotta keep it real
for them.
145
00:04:56,338 --> 00:04:57,672
Okay, listen to this.
146
00:04:57,714 --> 00:05:00,091
Spotify is talking about
a $20-million deal with us.
147
00:05:00,133 --> 00:05:01,569
- Yeah.
- So how 'bout that's keeping
148
00:05:01,593 --> 00:05:03,928
- shit real, bro?
- That's keeping it real real,
149
00:05:03,970 --> 00:05:05,638
so just keep your shit together,
150
00:05:05,680 --> 00:05:08,058
don't fuck it up,
and just keep cool.
151
00:05:08,099 --> 00:05:09,392
Offer's comin' in any minute.
152
00:05:09,434 --> 00:05:10,518
We're all gonna be rich.
153
00:05:10,560 --> 00:05:12,145
Okay. Great.
154
00:05:12,187 --> 00:05:13,730
- Got it?
- I got it, yeah.
155
00:05:13,772 --> 00:05:16,024
- Don't fuck this up.
- Okay, don't fuck it up.
156
00:05:49,432 --> 00:05:51,559
Yeah?
157
00:06:02,987 --> 00:06:04,989
Okay, ready?
Oh, good catch.
158
00:06:05,031 --> 00:06:06,700
Good boy.
Come here. Come here.
159
00:06:08,118 --> 00:06:09,869
Come here, boy,
you handsome boy.
160
00:06:12,706 --> 00:06:14,582
Ooh.
Oh, good catch.
161
00:06:14,624 --> 00:06:16,334
Oh, Duke is such a handsome boy.
162
00:06:16,376 --> 00:06:18,086
- Come here.
- Hey.
163
00:06:18,128 --> 00:06:20,088
Do you wanna try
this edible flower?
164
00:06:20,130 --> 00:06:22,882
Do you think
we could get the dog back?
165
00:06:22,924 --> 00:06:24,718
Uh, sorry, what?
166
00:06:24,759 --> 00:06:26,094
- Are you kidding?
- I just--I...
167
00:06:26,136 --> 00:06:28,096
I'm really feeling like
168
00:06:28,138 --> 00:06:29,514
he wants to come home.
169
00:06:29,556 --> 00:06:32,017
Okay, babe.
We gave them the dog.
170
00:06:32,058 --> 00:06:34,060
You can't ask for something
like that back.
171
00:06:34,102 --> 00:06:35,603
- That's insane.
- We gave him the dog
172
00:06:35,645 --> 00:06:37,272
because our yard was too small.
173
00:06:37,313 --> 00:06:38,273
- Yes.
- But that's about
174
00:06:38,314 --> 00:06:39,274
to fucking change.
175
00:06:39,315 --> 00:06:40,650
We're gonna have a huge yard.
176
00:06:40,692 --> 00:06:42,110
He should come home.
177
00:06:42,152 --> 00:06:43,504
I mean, look--
look at the way he's--
178
00:06:43,528 --> 00:06:45,363
he throws the ball
like such a pussy.
179
00:06:45,405 --> 00:06:46,823
- He's like--
- Anybody see that?
180
00:06:46,865 --> 00:06:48,700
It is kind of a lame throw.
181
00:06:48,742 --> 00:06:50,469
- Right? Just like--
- Yeah, but that doesn't mean
182
00:06:50,493 --> 00:06:51,619
you can steal the dog back.
183
00:06:51,661 --> 00:06:53,663
Good catch, Duke!
184
00:06:53,705 --> 00:06:54,789
His name is McEnroe.
185
00:06:54,831 --> 00:06:56,624
It's not Duke, and he knows it.
186
00:06:56,666 --> 00:06:58,209
You gotta let it go, okay?
187
00:06:58,251 --> 00:06:59,461
We can't ask for the dog back.
188
00:06:59,502 --> 00:07:02,297
Okay, fine.
We'll buy him back.
189
00:07:02,339 --> 00:07:04,674
You know how much
Simon loves this dog?
190
00:07:04,716 --> 00:07:06,551
He does. He's obsessed.
191
00:07:06,593 --> 00:07:08,470
He sleeps in the guesthouse
with him.
192
00:07:08,511 --> 00:07:10,013
Do you think I give a shit?
193
00:07:11,598 --> 00:07:13,099
Hey, pal.
194
00:07:14,684 --> 00:07:16,120
It's us.
He's look--he's looking at--
195
00:07:16,144 --> 00:07:17,496
- Babe, he's not looking at us.
- He's looking at us.
196
00:07:17,520 --> 00:07:19,272
No, he's not.
You can't take something
197
00:07:19,314 --> 00:07:20,273
- like that away.
- Hey.
198
00:07:20,315 --> 00:07:21,316
That's--that's nuts.
199
00:07:21,358 --> 00:07:22,442
Yeah, um, can I--
200
00:07:22,484 --> 00:07:23,627
can I grab you for a second?
I just--
201
00:07:23,651 --> 00:07:24,819
- Yeah.
- I need a hand.
202
00:07:24,861 --> 00:07:27,697
Yes. Please don't
steal the dog, okay?
203
00:07:27,739 --> 00:07:29,407
Come here, Duke.
Come to me. Come to me.
204
00:07:29,449 --> 00:07:30,950
Oh, come here. Good catch.
205
00:07:30,992 --> 00:07:33,453
Good boy.
Come here. Come here.
206
00:07:33,495 --> 00:07:35,038
Okay, Duke.
207
00:07:35,080 --> 00:07:36,373
Go get it.
208
00:07:36,414 --> 00:07:38,458
Oh, good catch.
You're such a handsome boy.
209
00:07:38,500 --> 00:07:39,709
Bring it back. Bring it back.
210
00:07:50,345 --> 00:07:53,890
Just love this room!
211
00:07:53,932 --> 00:07:55,850
It's so beautiful.
Where are the party favors?
212
00:07:55,892 --> 00:07:57,435
- You hiding them up here?
- Ava--
213
00:07:57,477 --> 00:07:58,853
Also, you have no pictures.
214
00:07:58,895 --> 00:08:01,356
- It's really weird.
- Hey, are you okay?
215
00:08:01,398 --> 00:08:03,525
What?
216
00:08:06,778 --> 00:08:08,113
What--what is that?
217
00:08:08,154 --> 00:08:09,989
I don't know. You tell me.
218
00:08:10,031 --> 00:08:12,033
I saw it fall out
of your pocket at CrimeCon.
219
00:08:12,075 --> 00:08:15,286
I've--I've never seen that
before in my life.
220
00:08:15,328 --> 00:08:16,722
You've never seen this before
in your life?
221
00:08:16,746 --> 00:08:17,831
- No.
- Ever?
222
00:08:17,872 --> 00:08:19,374
- No.
- Okay.
223
00:08:19,416 --> 00:08:22,752
"WTF? You killed Dahlia?
224
00:08:22,794 --> 00:08:24,254
"You made a podcast without us?
225
00:08:24,295 --> 00:08:27,132
Meet us outside
in the corridor now."
226
00:08:28,842 --> 00:08:31,177
You're "Based on a True Story,"
aren't you?
227
00:08:31,219 --> 00:08:32,262
The--
228
00:08:32,303 --> 00:08:35,015
"Based on a" --
the--the--the podcast?
229
00:08:35,056 --> 00:08:36,725
Ava, I-I just--
I wanna help you.
230
00:08:36,766 --> 00:08:37,851
- Are you in danger?
- No.
231
00:08:37,892 --> 00:08:39,644
Because I--I called the number
232
00:08:39,686 --> 00:08:40,788
on this phone,
and Matt answered.
233
00:08:40,812 --> 00:08:43,023
I don't--no. What?
234
00:08:43,064 --> 00:08:45,400
He's the Westside
fucking Ripper, isn't he?
235
00:08:45,442 --> 00:08:46,901
What is going on?
236
00:08:46,943 --> 00:08:48,379
- Okay--
- Why--why are you doing this?
237
00:08:48,403 --> 00:08:49,797
- Is--is he threatening you...
- It's not what you think.
238
00:08:49,821 --> 00:08:51,072
- Or Nathan?
- Oh, my God, no.
239
00:08:51,114 --> 00:08:53,324
It's not--
it's not like that at all.
240
00:08:53,366 --> 00:08:55,243
No? Then what is it?
Because it says right here
241
00:08:55,285 --> 00:08:56,911
that he killed
that girl in Vegas.
242
00:08:56,953 --> 00:08:58,747
Okay, is that why
you invited Matt tonight?
243
00:08:58,788 --> 00:09:00,040
So you could ask me about this?
244
00:09:00,081 --> 00:09:01,750
I mean, I invited him
to find out
245
00:09:01,791 --> 00:09:03,436
if he's the guy so I--
so I could help you,
246
00:09:03,460 --> 00:09:05,187
but if you don't want my help,
I'll just go to the cops with--
247
00:09:05,211 --> 00:09:06,647
No, no, no. No, no, no.
No, no, no, no, no.
248
00:09:06,671 --> 00:09:08,816
There's no--we don't need to--
let's just all calm down.
249
00:09:08,840 --> 00:09:10,276
No cops.
You don't need to call anybody.
250
00:09:10,300 --> 00:09:12,427
Oh, fuck. Okay.
I'm gonna tell you the truth.
251
00:09:12,469 --> 00:09:14,054
- Okay?
- Okay.
252
00:09:15,263 --> 00:09:16,723
Nathan and I are broke.
253
00:09:16,765 --> 00:09:18,850
We--we were gonna lose
the house.
254
00:09:18,892 --> 00:09:20,310
- What?
- I know, and Matt was over,
255
00:09:20,352 --> 00:09:21,936
and we started talking,
and it turns out
256
00:09:21,978 --> 00:09:25,106
he's a--he's this, like,
crime fanatic junkie like us.
257
00:09:25,148 --> 00:09:29,486
So the three of us decided
to make a fake podcast
258
00:09:29,527 --> 00:09:33,323
where Matt pretends
to be the Westside Ripper.
259
00:09:36,409 --> 00:09:40,121
So Matt is pretending
to be a serial killer?
260
00:09:40,163 --> 00:09:41,498
I know.
When you say it like that,
261
00:09:41,539 --> 00:09:42,624
it sounds really bad, but--
262
00:09:42,665 --> 00:09:45,251
it-it's so bad and--
and fucked up.
263
00:09:45,293 --> 00:09:47,253
I know it sounds like that,
but we were desperate,
264
00:09:47,295 --> 00:09:49,255
desperate,
completely desperate, and--
265
00:09:49,297 --> 00:09:51,466
and then Matt, like,
he got, like, really into it,
266
00:09:51,508 --> 00:09:53,218
and he pretended he was the guy
267
00:09:53,259 --> 00:09:54,761
that pushed that girl
off the roof.
268
00:09:54,803 --> 00:09:56,137
And people got obsessed.
269
00:09:56,179 --> 00:09:58,431
They couldn't get enough of it.
270
00:09:58,473 --> 00:10:01,601
So you're saying
that all of this is--is fake
271
00:10:01,643 --> 00:10:02,828
and that guy's just a plumber?
272
00:10:02,852 --> 00:10:04,896
- Yes!
- Because this looks
273
00:10:04,938 --> 00:10:06,523
pretty fucking real to me.
274
00:10:06,564 --> 00:10:07,732
Well, good.
275
00:10:07,774 --> 00:10:10,276
We-- We got you.
276
00:10:10,318 --> 00:10:11,361
That's good.
277
00:10:11,403 --> 00:10:12,570
That--
278
00:10:12,612 --> 00:10:14,322
Come on.
279
00:10:14,364 --> 00:10:16,449
Do you think
that I would be in business
280
00:10:16,491 --> 00:10:18,993
with a real serial killer?
281
00:10:19,035 --> 00:10:21,996
I mean, you sound insane.
282
00:10:22,038 --> 00:10:24,666
That would be the biggest
fucking stupidest thing
283
00:10:24,708 --> 00:10:26,334
I could do, right?
284
00:10:26,376 --> 00:10:28,086
Right?
285
00:10:29,713 --> 00:10:30,839
- Yeah.
- Right.
286
00:10:30,880 --> 00:10:32,173
Please don't tell anybody.
287
00:10:32,215 --> 00:10:35,427
Truly, like, I--
I literally dragged Nathan
288
00:10:35,468 --> 00:10:36,886
into this shit show.
289
00:10:36,928 --> 00:10:38,388
There's a baby coming.
290
00:10:38,430 --> 00:10:41,141
Our lives could be over.
291
00:10:41,182 --> 00:10:42,392
Please.
292
00:10:44,394 --> 00:10:45,770
Okay.
293
00:10:45,812 --> 00:10:47,772
Okay.
Yeah, no, no, no. I--I--
294
00:10:47,814 --> 00:10:48,857
I won't say a word.
295
00:10:48,898 --> 00:10:50,692
Thank you.
296
00:10:50,734 --> 00:10:53,111
- Thank you.
- Wow.
297
00:10:53,153 --> 00:10:56,197
I got to admit, this is--
this is kind of genius.
298
00:10:56,239 --> 00:10:58,742
"Based on a True Story"
is based on a fake story.
299
00:10:58,783 --> 00:11:00,827
- I know.
- I-I wish I'd thought of it.
300
00:11:00,869 --> 00:11:03,413
Yeah. Well, yeah.
Well, yeah. Mm-hmm.
301
00:11:03,455 --> 00:11:04,748
Thank you.
302
00:11:05,915 --> 00:11:07,334
I got your back.
303
00:11:07,375 --> 00:11:10,545
- Thank you. Okay. Okay.
- Let's go back outside.
304
00:11:10,587 --> 00:11:13,590
Duke, Duke.
Duke.
305
00:11:13,631 --> 00:11:14,591
- Duke.
- McEnroe. See?
306
00:11:14,632 --> 00:11:16,009
He likes McEnroe. McEnroe.
307
00:11:16,051 --> 00:11:17,552
McEnroe, right there.
308
00:11:18,720 --> 00:11:20,055
Good boy.
309
00:11:20,096 --> 00:11:21,765
Yes! Come on, buddy.
310
00:11:21,806 --> 00:11:23,475
- Come here. Come here.
- Come on, buddy.
311
00:11:27,354 --> 00:11:29,230
Come to me, Duke.
Come to me, Duke.
312
00:11:31,191 --> 00:11:32,233
Good boy.
313
00:11:33,651 --> 00:11:34,944
- Ready? Go.
- Okay.
314
00:11:34,986 --> 00:11:37,113
I--I got it.
Okay, here we go.
315
00:11:37,155 --> 00:11:38,490
Go get it.
316
00:11:38,531 --> 00:11:39,531
Here boy. Come on.
317
00:11:42,077 --> 00:11:43,787
- Here, boy. Come on.
- Duke.
318
00:11:43,828 --> 00:11:45,121
- Hey, hey.
- Come on.
319
00:11:45,163 --> 00:11:46,831
Bring it to me.
Bring it to me, to me.
320
00:11:46,873 --> 00:11:49,042
- Me, me.
- McEnroe, look at me.
321
00:11:49,084 --> 00:11:51,461
Come here, pal. Come here, pal.
322
00:11:51,503 --> 00:11:52,545
Look at me. Come here.
323
00:11:52,587 --> 00:11:54,172
- Bring it to me. To me.
- Duke. Duke!
324
00:11:55,882 --> 00:11:58,093
Come to me, Duke.
Come to me.
325
00:11:58,134 --> 00:12:00,720
Come to me.
Come to me, Duke.
326
00:12:00,762 --> 00:12:03,056
Yay--oh!
327
00:12:03,098 --> 00:12:05,350
Aah!
328
00:12:10,814 --> 00:12:11,856
Help! Help!
329
00:12:25,328 --> 00:12:27,539
I'm gonna getcha outta here.
330
00:12:50,770 --> 00:12:52,063
- McEnroe.
- Duke.
331
00:12:52,105 --> 00:12:53,499
- McEnroe.
- Come to me. Come to me, Duke.
332
00:12:53,523 --> 00:12:54,875
- Bring it to me.
- Come to me. Come to me, Duke.
333
00:12:54,899 --> 00:12:56,234
- Duke!
- Look at me.
334
00:12:56,276 --> 00:12:57,235
- Come to me. Come to me.
- McEnroe.
335
00:12:57,277 --> 00:12:58,820
Come to me.
Yeah, yeah.
336
00:12:58,862 --> 00:12:59,982
- Oh! Oh, don't--
- Good boy.
337
00:13:04,325 --> 00:13:05,952
Hey.
338
00:13:05,994 --> 00:13:07,787
Hi. Hi.
339
00:13:07,829 --> 00:13:09,998
You good?
340
00:13:10,040 --> 00:13:12,667
Um, yes.
341
00:13:12,709 --> 00:13:14,419
Yes, I'm good.
342
00:13:14,461 --> 00:13:17,172
Everybody, please
take a seat inside.
343
00:13:17,213 --> 00:13:20,133
Dinner first,
and then the auction.
344
00:13:22,218 --> 00:13:24,054
Yeah, he likes me
so much better than Simon.
345
00:13:24,095 --> 00:13:27,140
- I know.
- Let's get that fuckin' brick.
346
00:13:27,182 --> 00:13:30,769
Hey, did you call me before?
347
00:13:30,810 --> 00:13:32,687
Uh, it was a butt-dial, sorry.
348
00:13:32,729 --> 00:13:34,314
- Really?
- Yep.
349
00:13:34,356 --> 00:13:35,982
Where's the trust, partner?
350
00:13:42,739 --> 00:13:44,324
The same caterer did my--
our wedding.
351
00:13:44,366 --> 00:13:46,409
- I didn't know that.
- Uh-huh.
352
00:13:46,451 --> 00:13:48,161
- That's right.
- Yeah.
353
00:13:48,203 --> 00:13:49,204
Hm?
354
00:13:49,245 --> 00:13:50,264
- Absolutely.
- It's great.
355
00:13:50,288 --> 00:13:51,247
- Okay.
- I wish he would take
356
00:13:51,289 --> 00:13:52,529
- an interest in my--
- I mean--
357
00:13:55,919 --> 00:13:57,921
- You tried your cake?
- No.
358
00:13:57,962 --> 00:13:59,047
Goodness.
359
00:13:59,089 --> 00:14:00,090
Thank you.
360
00:14:00,131 --> 00:14:01,591
Nice to see you.
361
00:14:01,633 --> 00:14:04,260
So are you a part
of the crew now?
362
00:14:04,302 --> 00:14:05,929
Hey, did you crush
those midterms?
363
00:14:05,970 --> 00:14:08,390
Yeah, I'm going
to UCLA Law in the fall.
364
00:14:08,431 --> 00:14:10,684
- Oh, my God. Congrats.
- Yeah, thanks.
365
00:14:10,725 --> 00:14:12,268
So we're gonna see
a lot more of you.
366
00:14:12,310 --> 00:14:14,312
- Yeah, a whole lot more.
- Awesome.
367
00:14:14,354 --> 00:14:16,314
"Crushed those midterms"?
368
00:14:16,356 --> 00:14:18,483
So a sign of the times,
I tried to put an ad
369
00:14:18,525 --> 00:14:21,820
on that hot true crime podcast,
"Based on a True Story."
370
00:14:21,861 --> 00:14:23,029
- Hot.
- Brilliant.
371
00:14:23,071 --> 00:14:24,239
Such a hot show.
372
00:14:24,280 --> 00:14:26,241
- Is that not a genius idea?
- Right?
373
00:14:26,282 --> 00:14:27,742
- Yeah.
- Amazing.
374
00:14:27,784 --> 00:14:29,327
- Brilliant.
- Yeah.
375
00:14:29,369 --> 00:14:31,055
- I love that.
- Oh, my gosh, it gets me hot.
376
00:14:31,079 --> 00:14:32,330
- So brilliant.
- It's so good.
377
00:14:32,372 --> 00:14:33,665
- I think it's fake.
- Oh, yeah?
378
00:14:33,707 --> 00:14:36,418
Yeah, like, the, um--
the Orson Welles thing?
379
00:14:36,459 --> 00:14:37,585
Uh, "War of the Worlds"?
380
00:14:37,627 --> 00:14:39,671
It could be just street theater.
381
00:14:39,713 --> 00:14:41,798
Absolutely not.
Are you kidding me?
382
00:14:41,840 --> 00:14:43,133
You heard this guy's voice?
383
00:14:43,174 --> 00:14:44,759
That's a stabby voice.
384
00:14:44,801 --> 00:14:47,178
- What?
- I buy it 100%.
385
00:14:47,220 --> 00:14:48,847
- That guy is the killer.
- Mm.
386
00:14:48,888 --> 00:14:51,307
- You should just ask them.
- There's no chance.
387
00:14:51,349 --> 00:14:53,852
- Yeah.
- You never talk to anybody.
388
00:14:53,893 --> 00:14:55,145
- Oh.
- No, you--
389
00:14:55,186 --> 00:14:57,230
you email a shell corporation.
390
00:14:57,272 --> 00:14:58,773
You pay them in crypto.
391
00:14:58,815 --> 00:15:02,444
Nobody knows where they are
or who they are.
392
00:15:02,485 --> 00:15:04,988
- Wow.
- I wouldn't pay them a cent.
393
00:15:05,030 --> 00:15:07,866
Paul, the guy is killing people.
394
00:15:07,907 --> 00:15:09,659
Okay, Richard.
395
00:15:09,701 --> 00:15:13,496
Last time I checked, there is
still free speech in America.
396
00:15:13,538 --> 00:15:15,790
Okay, even if that speech
is about
397
00:15:15,832 --> 00:15:17,292
how you just killed someone?
398
00:15:17,334 --> 00:15:18,626
Yeah, especially then.
399
00:15:18,668 --> 00:15:21,129
You--you wanna outlaw
offensive speech?
400
00:15:21,171 --> 00:15:22,839
Who decides
what goes on the list?
401
00:15:22,881 --> 00:15:24,382
Me? You?
402
00:15:24,424 --> 00:15:26,176
I listen to it, and I think
403
00:15:26,217 --> 00:15:28,178
it's totally fucking disgusting.
404
00:15:28,219 --> 00:15:29,888
I think that you're right.
405
00:15:29,929 --> 00:15:31,514
I think that it's all true.
406
00:15:31,556 --> 00:15:33,141
I think he's a serial killer.
407
00:15:33,183 --> 00:15:35,018
And I think the people
that are helping him
408
00:15:35,060 --> 00:15:36,644
are far worse than he is.
409
00:15:36,686 --> 00:15:38,563
- Oh. What people?
- Preach, sister.
410
00:15:38,605 --> 00:15:39,856
- There's an interviewer.
- Hm?
411
00:15:39,898 --> 00:15:41,417
- Don't say that.
- Right? I mean, somebody...
412
00:15:41,441 --> 00:15:42,835
- No, that's not your word.
- Has to be helping him.
413
00:15:42,859 --> 00:15:46,321
The Westside Ripper has
some kind of brain defect,
414
00:15:46,363 --> 00:15:48,823
but these parasites are
making money off of him.
415
00:15:48,865 --> 00:15:50,825
They should go to prison
longer than he does.
416
00:15:50,867 --> 00:15:53,078
That's a very good point.
417
00:15:53,119 --> 00:15:54,371
No, they really should.
418
00:15:54,412 --> 00:15:56,247
- Think about it.
- Mm.
419
00:15:56,289 --> 00:15:58,625
I don't know. I--
420
00:15:58,667 --> 00:16:00,835
there's nothing wrong
with makin' money.
421
00:16:00,877 --> 00:16:03,046
I love money. You love money.
422
00:16:03,088 --> 00:16:04,589
You love money.
423
00:16:04,631 --> 00:16:06,049
Money's great.
424
00:16:06,091 --> 00:16:07,384
Puts food on the table,
425
00:16:07,425 --> 00:16:09,386
puts our kids through school.
426
00:16:09,427 --> 00:16:11,513
Carlos loves money.
Right?
427
00:16:11,554 --> 00:16:12,806
What?
428
00:16:12,847 --> 00:16:15,058
Can't open your gym
on the East Coast
429
00:16:15,100 --> 00:16:17,310
without money, right?
430
00:16:17,352 --> 00:16:19,562
Uh, it certainly
would help, yeah.
431
00:16:19,604 --> 00:16:22,524
Mm, guys, I think it's time
432
00:16:22,565 --> 00:16:24,734
to start bidding
on the items, right?
433
00:16:24,776 --> 00:16:26,986
I just wanna say
I love Carlos' business plan.
434
00:16:27,028 --> 00:16:29,322
- Oh, my God.
- And I--
435
00:16:29,364 --> 00:16:30,740
I want to invest in it.
436
00:16:30,782 --> 00:16:33,743
Wait, you--you want
to invest in my gym?
437
00:16:33,785 --> 00:16:37,914
Yeah, I want to finance
the whole thing by myself.
438
00:16:39,249 --> 00:16:40,417
Well, that's--
439
00:16:40,458 --> 00:16:41,668
Wait, are you serious?
440
00:16:41,710 --> 00:16:42,919
100%.
441
00:16:42,961 --> 00:16:43,920
- Great.
- Yeah?
442
00:16:43,962 --> 00:16:45,046
When do we start?
443
00:16:46,965 --> 00:16:48,883
Now.
444
00:16:48,925 --> 00:16:50,885
What?
445
00:16:50,927 --> 00:16:52,762
Now.
446
00:16:52,804 --> 00:16:54,055
Like, right now.
447
00:16:54,097 --> 00:16:55,223
Immediately.
448
00:16:56,766 --> 00:16:57,851
Immediately?
449
00:16:57,892 --> 00:16:59,269
He's joking.
450
00:16:59,310 --> 00:17:01,312
He's just--
451
00:17:01,354 --> 00:17:03,565
Go pack a bag,
452
00:17:03,606 --> 00:17:05,025
go to LAX,
453
00:17:05,066 --> 00:17:07,819
get on the red-eye,
go to New York, get to work.
454
00:17:07,861 --> 00:17:10,405
It's gonna take
a couple of years.
455
00:17:10,447 --> 00:17:12,198
I'm gonna need you there
the whole time
456
00:17:12,240 --> 00:17:14,826
overseeing construction,
the plans,
457
00:17:14,868 --> 00:17:18,371
and you're not gonna be able
to come back here ever.
458
00:17:23,835 --> 00:17:26,296
Why you doing this?
459
00:17:26,338 --> 00:17:28,757
- Hm?
- Hm?
460
00:17:28,798 --> 00:17:30,884
Why are you doing this
right now?
461
00:17:30,925 --> 00:17:32,177
Is it 'cause I invited him?
462
00:17:32,218 --> 00:17:35,096
What?
463
00:17:35,138 --> 00:17:36,639
I believe in Carlos.
464
00:17:36,681 --> 00:17:38,808
I like Carlos' business plan.
465
00:17:38,850 --> 00:17:41,936
Unless there's something
that Carlos loves
466
00:17:41,978 --> 00:17:45,148
more than money here in LA.
467
00:17:45,190 --> 00:17:46,358
Then he should stay.
468
00:17:49,694 --> 00:17:51,654
Okay.
469
00:17:51,696 --> 00:17:55,450
I just transferred you $250,000.
470
00:17:55,492 --> 00:17:56,492
What?
471
00:18:03,541 --> 00:18:04,918
When I get my investment back,
472
00:18:04,959 --> 00:18:06,544
we'll go 50/50.
473
00:18:06,586 --> 00:18:09,381
If it works out, I'll finance
a national rollout,
474
00:18:09,422 --> 00:18:12,384
but you gotta go right now.
475
00:18:20,392 --> 00:18:21,351
You don't have to go.
476
00:18:21,393 --> 00:18:24,229
Babe, please, stay for me.
477
00:18:24,270 --> 00:18:25,730
You gotta go, Carlos.
478
00:18:28,108 --> 00:18:29,275
I'm sorry.
479
00:18:30,193 --> 00:18:32,153
Oh.
480
00:18:44,541 --> 00:18:47,043
Are you fucking insane?
481
00:18:51,297 --> 00:18:53,425
Why would you do that?
482
00:18:53,466 --> 00:18:55,885
Why the fuck do you even care?
483
00:18:59,264 --> 00:19:00,974
God.
484
00:19:02,267 --> 00:19:03,435
Hey, buddy.
485
00:19:03,476 --> 00:19:04,978
You got
some interesting friends.
486
00:19:05,020 --> 00:19:08,398
Okay, let's help
some teen runaways!
487
00:19:10,108 --> 00:19:12,277
Oh, my God.
488
00:19:12,318 --> 00:19:14,154
I cannot believe that happened.
489
00:19:15,697 --> 00:19:16,656
You okay?
490
00:19:16,698 --> 00:19:18,199
I know you really loved Carlos.
491
00:19:18,241 --> 00:19:19,743
Oh, fuck Carlos.
492
00:19:19,784 --> 00:19:21,494
I never loved Carlos,
493
00:19:21,536 --> 00:19:24,664
but fuck him for leaving.
494
00:19:24,706 --> 00:19:28,251
Well, I mean, we all know
you're gonna be just fine.
495
00:19:28,293 --> 00:19:30,170
- Will I?
- Yes.
496
00:19:30,211 --> 00:19:33,089
'Cause I feel like
I'm pretty fucked right now.
497
00:19:33,131 --> 00:19:37,135
Ava, look at my life right now.
498
00:19:37,177 --> 00:19:38,720
Take a good look.
499
00:19:38,762 --> 00:19:41,097
You gotta let me in
on the podcast.
500
00:19:41,139 --> 00:19:43,808
Okay? It's--it's literally
all that I got.
501
00:19:45,852 --> 00:19:48,104
Okay, uh, maybe we should
talk about this another time.
502
00:19:48,146 --> 00:19:50,148
No, no, no, 'cause--
'cause I can help you.
503
00:19:50,190 --> 00:19:52,359
You know, you--you know
I'm great with marketing.
504
00:19:52,400 --> 00:19:54,944
Right? And branding,
and I know this world.
505
00:19:54,986 --> 00:19:57,364
And we're the "Wine & Crime"
girls, right?
506
00:19:57,405 --> 00:19:58,924
- Yeah, I can't do this.
- Oh, well, I--
507
00:19:58,948 --> 00:20:00,825
because do you remember
that guy--
508
00:20:00,867 --> 00:20:02,762
that guy that I had
a thing with in Cabo last year?
509
00:20:02,786 --> 00:20:05,205
'Cause he's huge at Wondery,
510
00:20:05,246 --> 00:20:06,331
and--and he's married,
511
00:20:06,373 --> 00:20:07,749
so he definitely owes me
a solid.
512
00:20:07,791 --> 00:20:09,918
I can get him to make us
a preemptive offer,
513
00:20:09,959 --> 00:20:12,629
you know, probably
a really, really big one.
514
00:20:12,671 --> 00:20:14,255
- Oh, my God.
- Yes.
515
00:20:14,297 --> 00:20:18,635
So some guy is gonna make us
a multimillion-dollar offer
516
00:20:18,677 --> 00:20:20,470
because he went down on you
in Cabo?
517
00:20:20,512 --> 00:20:23,348
Yeah, that is
how the world works.
518
00:20:23,390 --> 00:20:25,225
How do you not know that?
519
00:20:25,266 --> 00:20:27,018
Okay, just trust me.
520
00:20:27,060 --> 00:20:29,121
You shouldn't get involved
in this 'cause it's a mess.
521
00:20:29,145 --> 00:20:30,480
Okay, hold on.
522
00:20:30,522 --> 00:20:31,666
Don't come at me like
you're my friend now.
523
00:20:31,690 --> 00:20:33,191
- What?
- No, I know exactly
524
00:20:33,233 --> 00:20:34,776
what's going on.
525
00:20:34,818 --> 00:20:37,529
I mean, I know
Matt's the killer.
526
00:20:37,570 --> 00:20:39,864
I have no fucking idea
what you're talking about.
527
00:20:39,906 --> 00:20:41,324
Okay.
528
00:20:41,366 --> 00:20:42,909
So if I took Matt's wine glass
529
00:20:42,951 --> 00:20:44,661
and took it down
to the police station,
530
00:20:44,703 --> 00:20:47,997
you're telling me that his DNA
wouldn't be an exact match
531
00:20:48,039 --> 00:20:49,499
to the Westside Ripper?
532
00:20:52,711 --> 00:20:54,713
If you tell a single person
about this,
533
00:20:54,754 --> 00:20:57,465
I will fucking end you.
534
00:20:57,507 --> 00:20:59,092
But I already told Simon.
535
00:21:00,510 --> 00:21:02,387
- What?
- Yeah.
536
00:21:02,429 --> 00:21:04,389
- I told him.
- You told--
537
00:21:04,431 --> 00:21:06,016
you told Simon?
Are you insane?
538
00:21:06,057 --> 00:21:08,351
- Why would you do that?
- Because he's a lawyer,
539
00:21:08,393 --> 00:21:09,769
and he will protect me!
540
00:21:09,811 --> 00:21:12,022
Oh, my God.
He's not gonna protect you.
541
00:21:12,063 --> 00:21:14,482
He fucking hates you.
He hates everything about you!
542
00:21:14,524 --> 00:21:16,693
Oh, sweetie.
543
00:21:16,735 --> 00:21:18,111
That's just married talk.
544
00:21:18,153 --> 00:21:19,672
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
I can't believe
545
00:21:19,696 --> 00:21:21,239
you would be stupid enough
546
00:21:21,281 --> 00:21:22,782
to fucking tell Simon!
547
00:21:22,824 --> 00:21:25,160
Oh, I absolutely am that stupid.
548
00:21:25,201 --> 00:21:26,703
And why not?
549
00:21:26,745 --> 00:21:29,914
I mean, it's worked pretty well
for me so far, right?
550
00:21:29,956 --> 00:21:31,416
Tell me something.
551
00:21:31,458 --> 00:21:34,044
Who's the one
living in a mansion
552
00:21:34,085 --> 00:21:36,880
in the Palisades,
553
00:21:36,921 --> 00:21:39,424
and who can't afford
their mortgage in Mar Vista?
554
00:21:40,550 --> 00:21:42,093
Okay, you listen to me,
555
00:21:42,135 --> 00:21:44,637
you with your little
400 calories a day,
556
00:21:44,679 --> 00:21:46,848
your cool sculpt,
and your amazing blowjobs
557
00:21:46,890 --> 00:21:47,992
you can't stop bragging about--
558
00:21:48,016 --> 00:21:50,060
- They are amazing.
- Well,
559
00:21:50,101 --> 00:21:52,729
not amazing enough
to keep Carlos around.
560
00:21:52,771 --> 00:21:54,564
So if you wanna go steal
561
00:21:54,606 --> 00:21:56,399
the Westside Ripper's
wine glass,
562
00:21:56,441 --> 00:21:57,859
good fucking luck.
563
00:21:57,901 --> 00:21:58,985
Fuck you.
564
00:21:59,027 --> 00:22:00,737
Fuck you, 'cause Nathan
will bring me in
565
00:22:00,779 --> 00:22:03,573
'cause he is nothing like you!
566
00:22:03,615 --> 00:22:05,575
He will cut me in!
567
00:22:05,617 --> 00:22:08,119
And my blowjobs
are the fucking best!
568
00:22:09,371 --> 00:22:12,415
Everyone in LA knows it...
569
00:22:12,457 --> 00:22:13,750
and Dubai.
570
00:22:18,171 --> 00:22:19,464
900, $900.
Ladies and gentlemen,
571
00:22:19,506 --> 00:22:20,775
it would be a dream
within a dream
572
00:22:20,799 --> 00:22:22,676
if we got to $1,000.
573
00:22:22,717 --> 00:22:25,470
Do I hear 1, $1,000
574
00:22:25,512 --> 00:22:26,721
for the Edgar Allan Poe brick.
575
00:22:26,763 --> 00:22:27,990
How 'bout a 1,200?
Who'll do a 1,200?
576
00:22:28,014 --> 00:22:29,450
There's a fan
of blood and murder for 1,200.
577
00:22:29,474 --> 00:22:31,267
Hey, can I talk to you
for a second?
578
00:22:31,309 --> 00:22:33,204
Hold on, these fuckers are
trying to steal your brick.
579
00:22:33,228 --> 00:22:34,646
- $1,300.
- Okay, but--
580
00:22:34,688 --> 00:22:37,357
I need you for one second.
581
00:22:37,399 --> 00:22:39,043
- We're gonna lose the brick.
- I don't care.
582
00:22:39,067 --> 00:22:40,735
Just come on.
583
00:22:40,777 --> 00:22:42,070
So here's the thing--
don't panic
584
00:22:42,112 --> 00:22:43,798
when I tell you this--
but I lost the burner.
585
00:22:43,822 --> 00:22:44,781
- What?
- I got it back,
586
00:22:44,823 --> 00:22:45,841
but I dropped it in Vegas,
587
00:22:45,865 --> 00:22:47,242
and then Ruby, she found it,
588
00:22:47,283 --> 00:22:48,386
- and now she's blackmailing...
- Oh, my fucking God.
589
00:22:48,410 --> 00:22:49,327
Us and wants in on everything.
590
00:22:49,369 --> 00:22:50,495
- Ruby?
- Yes.
591
00:22:50,537 --> 00:22:51,413
How did you not
know you dropped it?
592
00:22:51,454 --> 00:22:52,414
It was an accident! Okay?
593
00:22:52,455 --> 00:22:53,498
We had been using yours.
594
00:22:53,540 --> 00:22:54,642
I barely use mine.
I thought it was
595
00:22:54,666 --> 00:22:55,875
in my bag, but it fell out.
596
00:22:55,917 --> 00:22:57,353
I know I fucked up,
but she knows everything.
597
00:22:57,377 --> 00:22:59,170
She knows that Matt
is the Westside Ripper,
598
00:22:59,212 --> 00:23:01,131
and she told me
that she told Simon.
599
00:23:01,172 --> 00:23:03,883
- She told Simon?
- Well, she might be bluffing.
600
00:23:03,925 --> 00:23:05,653
- I don't fuckin' know, but--
- This is fine. It's fine.
601
00:23:05,677 --> 00:23:06,845
We're gonna figure this out.
602
00:23:06,886 --> 00:23:08,138
But this place is toxic.
603
00:23:08,179 --> 00:23:09,782
Okay? I'm telling you,
it's fucking toxic.
604
00:23:09,806 --> 00:23:12,017
They're nuts.
I'm taking McEnroe outta here.
605
00:23:12,058 --> 00:23:13,953
Babe, who fucking cares
about the dog right now?
606
00:23:13,977 --> 00:23:15,478
Just forget the fuckin' dog.
607
00:23:15,520 --> 00:23:17,063
We have bigger problems.
608
00:23:18,565 --> 00:23:20,025
- What? What?
- Oh, shit.
609
00:23:20,066 --> 00:23:23,069
Alba, she just came out
against us.
610
00:23:23,111 --> 00:23:24,279
No, not Alba.
611
00:23:24,320 --> 00:23:25,530
Jessica Alba just tweeted,
612
00:23:25,572 --> 00:23:27,907
"If #BasedOnATrueStory
is true, it's sickening.
613
00:23:27,949 --> 00:23:29,427
"If it's fake,
it might be even worse.
614
00:23:29,451 --> 00:23:30,720
"America,
we're better than this.
615
00:23:30,744 --> 00:23:33,455
#CancelBasedOnATrueStory."
616
00:23:33,496 --> 00:23:35,040
Oh, no, oh, no, oh, no.
617
00:23:35,081 --> 00:23:36,958
Okay, oh, fuck, fuck, fuck.
Oh, my God.
618
00:23:37,000 --> 00:23:37,959
Okay, maybe
it's not gonna track.
619
00:23:38,001 --> 00:23:39,627
Maybe no one's gonna pick
this up.
620
00:23:39,669 --> 00:23:42,047
Oh, shit.
Malia Obama just retweeted it.
621
00:23:43,089 --> 00:23:45,050
Oh, my God, so did Tom Hanks.
622
00:23:45,091 --> 00:23:47,260
- Kylie Jenner.
- Oh, my God.
623
00:23:47,302 --> 00:23:49,137
So did Dame Judi Dench.
624
00:23:49,179 --> 00:23:51,056
- Oh, I'm so sorry, babe.
- Oh, my God.
625
00:23:51,097 --> 00:23:53,558
- I know you love her.
- Are you seeing this shit?
626
00:23:53,600 --> 00:23:54,785
- Yes.
- We're gonna get canceled?
627
00:23:54,809 --> 00:23:56,811
- Alba fucked us.
- Okay, is there anyone
628
00:23:56,853 --> 00:23:57,896
that's for us?
629
00:23:57,937 --> 00:23:59,481
- For us? Um--
- Who is? Look.
630
00:23:59,522 --> 00:24:00,732
- Kanye?
- Okay, Kanye?
631
00:24:00,774 --> 00:24:02,192
Ugh, that's not good.
632
00:24:02,233 --> 00:24:03,234
The dude from NXIVM.
633
00:24:03,276 --> 00:24:04,527
Josh Duggar?
634
00:24:04,569 --> 00:24:05,862
Jared from Subway.
635
00:24:05,904 --> 00:24:07,131
- That's not good.
- That's bad.
636
00:24:07,155 --> 00:24:08,198
No.
637
00:24:08,239 --> 00:24:09,908
This is fuckin' awful.
638
00:24:09,949 --> 00:24:11,076
There goes iTunes.
639
00:24:11,117 --> 00:24:12,410
- We lost iTunes?
- Yes.
640
00:24:12,452 --> 00:24:13,536
Okay.
641
00:24:13,578 --> 00:24:14,805
Okay, here's what
we're gonna do.
642
00:24:14,829 --> 00:24:16,331
You and me,
we're gettin' outta here.
643
00:24:16,373 --> 00:24:17,933
We're takin' the dog.
We'll call you from the road.
644
00:24:17,957 --> 00:24:19,376
You're taking the fucking dog?
645
00:24:19,417 --> 00:24:20,436
Our brand is under attack.
646
00:24:20,460 --> 00:24:21,711
We gotta act now.
647
00:24:21,753 --> 00:24:23,588
Here's our play, okay?
648
00:24:23,630 --> 00:24:25,131
The snowflakes can suck it.
649
00:24:25,173 --> 00:24:27,676
We're gonna double down
just like our fans want.
650
00:24:27,717 --> 00:24:29,028
- I'm gonna go out tonight...
- No.
651
00:24:29,052 --> 00:24:31,888
- And I will--
- We are not doing that, okay?
652
00:24:31,930 --> 00:24:33,783
We have to do something,
but we are not doing that.
653
00:24:33,807 --> 00:24:34,766
You guys,
if we don't do something,
654
00:24:34,808 --> 00:24:37,102
we are gonna lose
the Spotify deal.
655
00:24:37,143 --> 00:24:38,812
Do you understand?
So what do we do?
656
00:24:38,853 --> 00:24:40,438
Wait, wait.
Hold on a second.
657
00:24:40,480 --> 00:24:41,648
Wait a minute.
Doesn't...
658
00:24:41,690 --> 00:24:44,818
doesn't Ruby know Alba?
659
00:24:44,859 --> 00:24:47,070
Yes. You know what?
She was her body double
660
00:24:47,112 --> 00:24:48,363
in "Spy Kids 4."
661
00:24:48,405 --> 00:24:49,590
Remember, she had the wig
and the costume on
662
00:24:49,614 --> 00:24:50,782
one night after shooting?
663
00:24:50,824 --> 00:24:52,409
She loves to hold that over me.
664
00:24:52,450 --> 00:24:53,618
She went down on Kid Rock.
665
00:24:53,660 --> 00:24:54,869
- Someone took a photo.
- Yeah.
666
00:24:54,911 --> 00:24:56,705
Why don't we get Ruby
to tell Alba
667
00:24:56,746 --> 00:24:58,456
that we'll release
the fuckin' photo
668
00:24:58,498 --> 00:24:59,791
unless she pulls the post?
669
00:24:59,833 --> 00:25:00,959
Why would Alba care?
670
00:25:01,001 --> 00:25:02,127
It's not her in the picture.
671
00:25:02,168 --> 00:25:03,920
It doesn't matter.
It looks like her.
672
00:25:03,962 --> 00:25:05,797
No, the tweet's out there.
It's taken flight.
673
00:25:05,839 --> 00:25:07,007
You go talk to Ruby.
674
00:25:07,048 --> 00:25:08,299
I'll find out what Simon knows.
675
00:25:08,341 --> 00:25:10,593
Ruby's not gonna do shit
for us right now.
676
00:25:10,635 --> 00:25:12,637
- Trust me.
- It's all we fuckin' got,
677
00:25:12,679 --> 00:25:14,180
guys. Let's go. Go.
678
00:25:14,222 --> 00:25:16,474
Big man, everyone!
679
00:25:17,517 --> 00:25:19,310
Big fuckin' man.
680
00:25:19,352 --> 00:25:22,397
What kind of control freak buys
his wife's boyfriend, huh?
681
00:25:22,439 --> 00:25:23,958
You're the one
who invited him, honey,
682
00:25:23,982 --> 00:25:25,126
in front of all of our friends.
683
00:25:25,150 --> 00:25:26,693
Yeah, you know why?
You know why?
684
00:25:26,735 --> 00:25:29,029
'Cause you can't get it up
unless you call me "Mommy."
685
00:25:29,070 --> 00:25:30,989
Do you guys know that?
What's up with that?
686
00:25:31,031 --> 00:25:33,324
You miss sucking
on Mommy's titties, huh?
687
00:25:33,366 --> 00:25:35,827
Yes! Yes, I do!
688
00:25:35,869 --> 00:25:37,287
You know what?
I actually like
689
00:25:37,328 --> 00:25:39,622
sucking Mom's tits
better than yours!
690
00:25:39,664 --> 00:25:41,207
Guys, that's not great
691
00:25:41,249 --> 00:25:42,625
- for the dog.
- Or anyone.
692
00:25:42,667 --> 00:25:45,962
Even if I stitched
Michael Fassbender's foreskin
693
00:25:46,004 --> 00:25:47,881
onto Orlando Bloom's dick...
694
00:25:47,922 --> 00:25:50,008
And Frankensteined
the perfect penis,
695
00:25:50,050 --> 00:25:51,926
I still couldn't get it up
for you!
696
00:25:51,968 --> 00:25:53,303
Are you gonna finally stroke out
697
00:25:53,345 --> 00:25:56,014
and leave me with all
your daddy's money, huh?
698
00:25:56,056 --> 00:25:59,768
Come on. Come on, McEnroe.
Come on.
699
00:25:59,809 --> 00:26:02,979
Okay, stay here, and stay quiet.
700
00:26:03,021 --> 00:26:04,415
I'm gonna get you outta here
tonight.
701
00:26:04,439 --> 00:26:05,482
Okay? Yeah.
702
00:26:05,523 --> 00:26:07,025
You think that hurt me?
703
00:26:07,067 --> 00:26:08,860
You think sending him away
hurt me?
704
00:26:08,902 --> 00:26:10,212
- Okay!
- You can't fucking hurt me.
705
00:26:10,236 --> 00:26:11,780
What do you want?
You want the spa day
706
00:26:11,821 --> 00:26:13,114
at the Peninsula, honey, huh?
707
00:26:13,156 --> 00:26:14,324
Do you want the deep tissue?
708
00:26:14,366 --> 00:26:16,034
Do you want me
to buy that for you?
709
00:26:16,076 --> 00:26:17,744
You're gonna continue
to buy my love!
710
00:26:17,786 --> 00:26:19,245
You're a fucking monster,
711
00:26:19,287 --> 00:26:21,247
and you've never loved anything
712
00:26:21,289 --> 00:26:24,000
in your entire life
except that dog!
713
00:26:24,042 --> 00:26:26,378
That's it!
How pathetic is that, everyone?
714
00:26:26,419 --> 00:26:28,880
- So now it's the dog's fault?
- Oh, sure!
715
00:26:28,922 --> 00:26:30,173
Yeah, it's the dog's fault!
716
00:26:30,215 --> 00:26:32,008
Sure,
it's the fucking dog's fault!
717
00:26:32,050 --> 00:26:33,343
You want me to shut the dog up?
718
00:26:33,385 --> 00:26:35,178
Yeah, go shut
the fucking dog up!
719
00:26:35,220 --> 00:26:37,055
Okay.
I'll shut the fucking dog up!
720
00:26:37,097 --> 00:26:38,056
Do you need Mommy's help?
721
00:26:38,098 --> 00:26:39,808
You think you can handle that?
722
00:26:39,849 --> 00:26:40,767
You got that, hon?
723
00:26:40,809 --> 00:26:42,394
Goddamn it!
724
00:26:42,435 --> 00:26:44,813
Hey, I know this is
a terrible time.
725
00:26:44,854 --> 00:26:46,731
I'm so sorry,
but, um, you're friends
726
00:26:46,773 --> 00:26:48,024
with Jessica Alba, right?
727
00:26:48,066 --> 00:26:49,818
- Yeah.
- You are?
728
00:26:49,859 --> 00:26:52,028
Yeah, she's really sweet,
actually.
729
00:26:52,070 --> 00:26:54,072
- Um--
- Fuck off and die!
730
00:26:55,198 --> 00:26:56,199
Oh, my God!
Oh, my God!
731
00:26:56,241 --> 00:26:57,909
Oh, my God.
Oh, no.
732
00:26:57,951 --> 00:26:59,369
No.
733
00:26:59,411 --> 00:27:01,246
- What's he doing?
- Someone...
734
00:27:01,287 --> 00:27:03,081
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
735
00:27:03,123 --> 00:27:04,833
- Uh--
- No, you should stay here.
736
00:27:06,292 --> 00:27:07,752
Wait...
737
00:27:07,794 --> 00:27:09,087
He's got a gun.
738
00:27:09,129 --> 00:27:10,272
- He's got a gun.
- Oh, my God.
739
00:27:10,296 --> 00:27:11,840
Oh, my God.
740
00:27:11,881 --> 00:27:12,841
Watch out.
Watch out!
741
00:27:12,882 --> 00:27:15,051
Oh, my God.
742
00:27:15,093 --> 00:27:16,720
What did you do?
743
00:27:18,805 --> 00:27:20,432
I shut the dog up.
744
00:27:22,267 --> 00:27:24,894
Oh, no.
745
00:27:27,772 --> 00:27:29,315
I shut it up.
746
00:27:29,357 --> 00:27:30,608
Oh, my God.
747
00:27:30,650 --> 00:27:32,610
Simon, please put that down.
748
00:27:34,654 --> 00:27:37,490
- What the fuck did you--
- I shut the fucking dog up
749
00:27:37,532 --> 00:27:39,409
is what I did.
750
00:27:45,957 --> 00:27:49,294
Okay, easy, please.
Please, please.
751
00:27:49,336 --> 00:27:53,298
No, no, no.
752
00:28:05,935 --> 00:28:09,981
I'm gonna come around you, okay?
753
00:28:10,023 --> 00:28:15,320
Hey. Just focus on me.
754
00:28:15,362 --> 00:28:17,530
All right?
755
00:28:17,572 --> 00:28:20,450
That's good. That's good.
756
00:28:20,492 --> 00:28:24,496
Man, you must be in shock.
757
00:28:27,707 --> 00:28:30,502
You're not a bad person.
758
00:28:30,543 --> 00:28:34,422
We all have anger in us.
759
00:28:34,464 --> 00:28:36,841
I know. It's okay.
760
00:28:36,883 --> 00:28:38,051
It's okay. It's all right.
761
00:28:38,093 --> 00:28:39,594
It's good. Yeah, yeah.
That's good.
762
00:28:39,636 --> 00:28:40,595
You don't wanna do this.
763
00:28:40,637 --> 00:28:42,889
Yeah. That's good.
764
00:28:42,931 --> 00:28:44,849
McEnroe!
765
00:28:47,185 --> 00:28:48,853
- Okay, Tory.
- You all right?
766
00:28:48,895 --> 00:28:50,021
I got you.
767
00:28:50,063 --> 00:28:51,022
I got you.
768
00:28:51,064 --> 00:28:52,357
He just lost his mind?
769
00:28:52,399 --> 00:28:55,860
Oh, no!
770
00:28:55,902 --> 00:28:57,696
I'm so sorry.
53507
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