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1
00:02:10,898 --> 00:02:14,857
Make the same. It's good for you.
Spring air.
2
00:02:15,236 --> 00:02:18,672
The way you're gulping it up,
there won't be enough left to go around.
3
00:02:18,739 --> 00:02:21,708
Isn't it very hot for so early in April,
Dr. Gurkakoff?
4
00:02:21,775 --> 00:02:23,140
I'm not surprised.
5
00:02:23,210 --> 00:02:26,202
This recent bombardment
by ions from the sun.
6
00:02:26,280 --> 00:02:29,408
You see, temperature is due
to the quantity of molecular...
7
00:02:29,483 --> 00:02:31,212
Hey, hey. Stop, stop,
8
00:02:31,285 --> 00:02:32,843
if you don't want me to retaliate
9
00:02:32,920 --> 00:02:35,946
by reciting all the tributary branches
of the Amazon.
10
00:02:36,023 --> 00:02:39,550
Incredible that only last week we were
drawing lots for our hot water bottle.
11
00:02:39,627 --> 00:02:42,824
Observe the forsythia or golden bell.
12
00:02:42,897 --> 00:02:45,161
I never knew it to bloom so early.
13
00:02:53,841 --> 00:02:55,809
Gentlemen. Gentlemen.
14
00:02:57,278 --> 00:02:58,939
It's 8:46, gentlemen.
15
00:02:59,013 --> 00:03:01,641
Oh, Potts.
Just once more around the park.
16
00:03:01,715 --> 00:03:03,740
Before we go back to our mausoleum.
17
00:03:03,817 --> 00:03:05,546
I saw a scarlet tanager
18
00:03:05,619 --> 00:03:08,918
which must have flown
all the way from Florida just to enjoy it.
19
00:03:08,989 --> 00:03:10,650
- 1,500 miles.
- Yes.
20
00:03:10,724 --> 00:03:13,591
Our constitutional
has taken up too much time already.
21
00:03:13,661 --> 00:03:15,185
We're working under pressure.
22
00:03:15,262 --> 00:03:18,527
After nine years of effort we are,
as the race track enthusiast might say,
23
00:03:18,599 --> 00:03:20,157
in the home stretch.
24
00:03:20,234 --> 00:03:22,225
Three more years
and our encyclopedia will be finished.
25
00:03:22,303 --> 00:03:24,567
Let's not bog down
in the middle of the letter "S."
26
00:03:24,638 --> 00:03:26,765
All right. All right.
That's done it.
27
00:03:26,840 --> 00:03:29,866
It's now 8:49, gentlemen.
I, for one, am going back to work.
28
00:03:29,944 --> 00:03:32,538
- Teacher's pet!
- Bertram Potts, the incorruptible.
29
00:03:32,613 --> 00:03:34,444
The eternal no-no man.
30
00:03:34,515 --> 00:03:35,504
Back home. Back home.
31
00:03:35,583 --> 00:03:38,108
Oh, well,
it may be raining this afternoon, anyway.
32
00:03:58,272 --> 00:04:00,365
- Good morning, Miss Bragg.
- Good morning, Miss Bragg.
33
00:04:00,441 --> 00:04:03,376
- Good morning, Miss Bragg.
- Good morning, Professor.
34
00:04:03,444 --> 00:04:05,309
- Good morning, Miss Bragg.
- Good morning.
35
00:04:05,379 --> 00:04:08,678
- Good morning, Miss Bragg.
- Good morning, Professor.
36
00:04:10,551 --> 00:04:13,850
Gentlemen, before you get down to work,
I have got something to say.
37
00:04:13,921 --> 00:04:15,912
One of you made off with
a jar of strawberry preserves
38
00:04:15,990 --> 00:04:17,252
from my pantry last night.
39
00:04:17,324 --> 00:04:21,761
I located the empty jar on the shelf behind
The Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire.
40
00:04:21,829 --> 00:04:25,060
That seems to indicate our historian,
Professor Peagram.
41
00:04:25,132 --> 00:04:26,565
I did no such thing, Miss Bragg.
42
00:04:26,634 --> 00:04:28,192
I'm not accusing anybody,
43
00:04:28,269 --> 00:04:31,761
but until it's cleared up, I think
we'll dispense with jam for breakfast.
44
00:04:31,839 --> 00:04:34,103
- Miss Bragg.
- Yes, Professor Oddly.
45
00:04:34,174 --> 00:04:35,766
I am the one.
46
00:04:35,843 --> 00:04:40,280
I was writing about strawberries
when suddenly I got a horrible craving.
47
00:04:40,347 --> 00:04:42,747
A crime confessed is half atoned.
48
00:04:44,385 --> 00:04:46,319
Miss Bragg. Miss Bragg.
49
00:04:46,387 --> 00:04:49,652
I had some material here.
What happened to it?
50
00:04:49,723 --> 00:04:50,815
What happened?
51
00:04:50,891 --> 00:04:53,359
I blushed for my duster
when I did your desk.
52
00:04:53,427 --> 00:04:56,453
You'll find everything
in the middle drawer, face down.
53
00:04:56,530 --> 00:05:00,830
I'm just starting my article on sex,
Miss Bragg. Any objections?
54
00:05:00,901 --> 00:05:05,031
No, I trust you have more control
of yourself than Professor Oddly.
55
00:05:09,043 --> 00:05:11,637
Professor Gurkakoff,
your window shade again.
56
00:05:11,712 --> 00:05:13,646
Yes, Miss Bragg.
57
00:05:13,714 --> 00:05:16,376
It's a crime
to carelessly expose this good carpet.
58
00:05:16,450 --> 00:05:18,941
You've just committed
a more serious crime, Miss Bragg.
59
00:05:19,019 --> 00:05:20,782
You have split an infinitive.
60
00:05:20,854 --> 00:05:24,620
Never "to carelessly expose."
Always "to expose carelessly."
61
00:05:24,692 --> 00:05:26,091
I'm not here to juggle words.
62
00:05:26,160 --> 00:05:28,890
It's my job
to conscientiously see that this house...
63
00:05:28,962 --> 00:05:30,896
You've just split another one, Miss Bragg.
64
00:05:30,964 --> 00:05:32,022
- Professor...
- Oh, oh.
65
00:05:32,099 --> 00:05:33,726
- Here's whatchamacallit.
- Who?
66
00:05:33,801 --> 00:05:36,702
The lawyer for the Foundation.
And Miss Totten's with him.
67
00:05:36,770 --> 00:05:38,965
And this place looking like a flicker's nest.
68
00:05:39,039 --> 00:05:42,941
Yes, we're in for our semi-annual wigging,
I suppose.
69
00:05:43,010 --> 00:05:44,705
- You'd better put your coat on, Potts.
- Why? What...
70
00:05:44,778 --> 00:05:47,269
- Better fix your tie.
- Fix your hair, fix your hair.
71
00:05:47,348 --> 00:05:48,645
Say, what is all this nonsense?
72
00:05:48,716 --> 00:05:51,685
This nonsense is Miss Totten.
And will you please smile at her?
73
00:05:51,752 --> 00:05:52,980
Say, this is all very undignified.
74
00:05:53,053 --> 00:05:55,385
- If you think you're being funny, I...
- Shh!
75
00:05:57,458 --> 00:05:59,756
- Morning, gentlemen.
Good morning.
76
00:05:59,827 --> 00:06:02,057
Won't you sit here, Miss Totten?
77
00:06:02,129 --> 00:06:04,120
It's a very nice morning, Miss Totten.
78
00:06:04,198 --> 00:06:06,098
Would you like to speak, Miss Totten,
or shall I?
79
00:06:06,166 --> 00:06:07,929
You, please, Mr. Larsen.
80
00:06:08,001 --> 00:06:10,060
I'll make this as brief as possible,
gentlemen.
81
00:06:10,137 --> 00:06:15,575
To date, $283,000 have been expended
in writing this encyclopedia.
82
00:06:15,943 --> 00:06:19,777
You all realize that Miss Totten's father,
the late Daniel S. Totten,
83
00:06:19,847 --> 00:06:22,441
left only a quarter of a million dollars
for this project.
84
00:06:22,516 --> 00:06:25,781
Every additional penny will have to come
from Miss Totten's own pocket.
85
00:06:25,853 --> 00:06:29,949
We would like a frank estimate
of how much longer you will take.
86
00:06:30,023 --> 00:06:35,017
- Maybe three years, maybe four.
- It cannot be. It just cannot be.
87
00:06:35,095 --> 00:06:37,029
Oh, my dear Miss Totten,
88
00:06:37,097 --> 00:06:39,622
you wouldn't discontinue
your father's great gesture
89
00:06:39,700 --> 00:06:41,793
towards human enlightenment?
90
00:06:41,869 --> 00:06:44,394
"Human enlightenment."
What nonsense, Professor Jerome.
91
00:06:44,471 --> 00:06:47,838
Papa had just one reason for ever starting
this unfortunate enterprise.
92
00:06:47,908 --> 00:06:48,932
Vanity.
93
00:06:49,009 --> 00:06:51,375
He broke a blood vessel
because he found his name was omitted
94
00:06:51,445 --> 00:06:53,037
from the Encyclopedia Britannica.
95
00:06:53,113 --> 00:06:56,241
Because 30 pages were devoted
to Thomas Alva Edison,
96
00:06:56,316 --> 00:06:58,307
17 to Alexander Graham Bell,
97
00:06:58,385 --> 00:07:02,947
but not one line to Daniel S. Totten,
the inventor of the electric toaster.
98
00:07:04,391 --> 00:07:06,825
In our encyclopedia,
99
00:07:06,894 --> 00:07:10,091
Mr. Totten shall receive
an appropriate amount of space.
100
00:07:10,164 --> 00:07:11,722
- Oh, yes, yes.
- Yes, of course.
101
00:07:11,799 --> 00:07:14,996
- Three quarters of a page, I should think.
- Three quarters of a page?
102
00:07:15,068 --> 00:07:16,763
- That's all he deserves.
- Is it?
103
00:07:16,837 --> 00:07:18,498
You may go on, Mr. Larsen.
104
00:07:18,572 --> 00:07:21,097
All we ask is
that you bring this thing to a close
105
00:07:21,175 --> 00:07:23,837
somehow or the other.
Get on with it. Slap it together.
106
00:07:23,911 --> 00:07:26,209
Mr. Larsen, may I have a word?
107
00:07:26,280 --> 00:07:29,511
- Hello, Professor Potts.
- Hello, Miss Totten.
108
00:07:30,584 --> 00:07:33,485
Mr. Larsen, you said, "Slap it together."
109
00:07:34,321 --> 00:07:36,118
We're not the slapping together kind.
110
00:07:36,190 --> 00:07:37,851
We have started an encyclopedia,
111
00:07:37,925 --> 00:07:40,621
and we shall finish it
as thoroughly as is humanly possible.
112
00:07:40,694 --> 00:07:43,561
- Another $100,000?
- If necessary, yes.
113
00:07:43,630 --> 00:07:46,793
If our work goes slowly
it's because the world, it goes so fast.
114
00:07:46,867 --> 00:07:49,131
Take Professor Jerome, our geographer.
115
00:07:49,203 --> 00:07:50,329
He has to rewrite all the time.
116
00:07:50,404 --> 00:07:52,099
- And Dr. Magenbruch...
I'm not interested.
117
00:07:52,172 --> 00:07:54,299
Don't interrupt, Mr. Larsen.
118
00:07:54,875 --> 00:07:56,502
Go on, Professor.
119
00:07:57,711 --> 00:07:59,736
I'm sure it's your wish that this monument
120
00:07:59,813 --> 00:08:03,112
to your father be finished
as nobly as it was begun.
121
00:08:06,620 --> 00:08:08,918
I'm appealing to you, Miss Totten,
122
00:08:08,989 --> 00:08:10,889
to your vision and to your heart.
123
00:08:10,958 --> 00:08:12,949
Maybe I'm a little inarticulate,
124
00:08:13,026 --> 00:08:15,460
but I've always regarded you as a...
125
00:08:15,963 --> 00:08:17,487
Yes, Professor?
126
00:08:19,132 --> 00:08:21,123
Always regarded you as a...
127
00:08:22,603 --> 00:08:24,093
Oh, Professor.
128
00:08:26,773 --> 00:08:30,265
- You know what I mean, Miss Totten.
- Yes.
129
00:08:30,344 --> 00:08:32,869
I warn you, Miss Totten,
another four years of this, with...
130
00:08:32,946 --> 00:08:35,744
After all, it was Father's wish.
131
00:08:35,816 --> 00:08:39,445
But, gentlemen, you will hurry
and finish the encyclopedia, won't you?
132
00:08:39,520 --> 00:08:41,545
- We will.
- Yes, yes, indeed.
133
00:08:43,624 --> 00:08:46,991
Last year, when all the other professors
came to my musical,
134
00:08:47,094 --> 00:08:49,426
where were you, Professor Potts?
135
00:08:49,930 --> 00:08:52,558
Sinus. But I shall be there this year.
136
00:08:52,933 --> 00:08:55,925
I shall look forward to seeing you again.
137
00:08:56,003 --> 00:08:57,664
- Goodbye.
- Goodbye.
138
00:08:58,171 --> 00:09:00,230
- Goodbye, madam.
- Good day.
139
00:09:00,307 --> 00:09:02,070
- Good day.
- Good day.
140
00:09:05,612 --> 00:09:08,103
That maneuver down my spine
was very unnecessary.
141
00:09:08,181 --> 00:09:10,046
- Was it, my dear Potts?
- Didn't it work?
142
00:09:10,717 --> 00:09:11,911
Hi.
143
00:09:12,119 --> 00:09:14,849
I hope you don't mind.
I came through the kitchen.
144
00:09:14,922 --> 00:09:17,356
Who are you?
- I'm the garbage man.
145
00:09:17,758 --> 00:09:20,226
I want to find out something
about Cleopatra.
146
00:09:20,294 --> 00:09:21,784
- Cleopatra?
- Yeah.
147
00:09:21,862 --> 00:09:24,023
This is some kind of a library or school,
isn't it?
148
00:09:24,097 --> 00:09:26,793
Neither, we are writing an encyclopedia.
149
00:09:26,867 --> 00:09:29,028
- Icyclo-what?
- An encyclopedia.
150
00:09:29,102 --> 00:09:31,764
A work which endeavors to compile
and catalog all human knowledge.
151
00:09:31,838 --> 00:09:33,533
Say, that's just what I need.
152
00:09:33,607 --> 00:09:35,666
Young man,
did you come through my kitchen?
153
00:09:35,742 --> 00:09:38,142
- That's right, sister.
- I'm not your sister, and you get out.
154
00:09:38,211 --> 00:09:40,145
- Oh, now...
- Miss Bragg.
155
00:09:40,213 --> 00:09:41,874
Please, Miss Bragg,
we find this intensely interesting.
156
00:09:41,949 --> 00:09:42,938
Go on, please.
157
00:09:43,016 --> 00:09:44,916
You can't tell me
he's not infested with germs.
158
00:09:44,985 --> 00:09:48,148
Then go and get your gas mask.
Now, shoo, scat, skedaddle.
159
00:09:48,221 --> 00:09:51,156
- Please, won't you take a seat?
- Thanks, bo.
160
00:09:51,592 --> 00:09:53,184
I seen all these books
through the window,
161
00:09:53,260 --> 00:09:55,194
and I figured
that maybe you can help me out.
162
00:09:55,262 --> 00:09:58,129
- In what way, young man?
- With this quizzola they got on the radio.
163
00:09:58,198 --> 00:09:59,222
- This what?
- Quizzola?
164
00:09:59,299 --> 00:10:00,926
Korn Krunchies Quiz-Quiz.
165
00:10:01,001 --> 00:10:03,902
Send in 100 box covers,
and you stand to make a little dough.
166
00:10:03,971 --> 00:10:07,498
Well, with my opportunities,
I got about 3,000 box covers together.
167
00:10:07,574 --> 00:10:10,042
Only some of the answers
you have to send in to the questions.
168
00:10:10,110 --> 00:10:11,975
You know, like true or false.
169
00:10:12,613 --> 00:10:13,773
You have those questions here?
170
00:10:13,847 --> 00:10:14,836
Yeah, sure.
171
00:10:14,915 --> 00:10:17,145
Well, that's very interesting.
172
00:10:18,452 --> 00:10:20,943
"Question one. Cleopatra died...
173
00:10:21,021 --> 00:10:23,080
"A. From swallowing a needle.
174
00:10:23,156 --> 00:10:25,090
"B. From snake bite.
175
00:10:25,158 --> 00:10:26,921
"C. From hiccups."
176
00:10:27,661 --> 00:10:30,186
That's my province. I cover history.
177
00:10:30,430 --> 00:10:32,455
The correct answer is "B."
178
00:10:32,933 --> 00:10:37,029
Cleopatra, queen of Egypt,
daughter of Ptolemy XIII, born 69 BC,
179
00:10:37,104 --> 00:10:40,130
killed herself
on the 29th day of August, 30 BC,
180
00:10:40,240 --> 00:10:42,470
by placing an asp to her bosom.
181
00:10:42,542 --> 00:10:44,339
- A what?
- An asp.
182
00:10:44,945 --> 00:10:46,503
A small snake.
183
00:10:46,580 --> 00:10:48,309
Well, patch my pantywaist.
184
00:10:48,382 --> 00:10:49,781
Well, well, next.
185
00:10:49,850 --> 00:10:51,579
"Which way would you say it?
186
00:10:51,652 --> 00:10:53,119
"Two and two is five.
187
00:10:53,186 --> 00:10:54,881
"Two and two are five.
188
00:10:54,955 --> 00:10:56,582
"Two and two makes five."
189
00:10:56,657 --> 00:10:58,682
Professor Potts covers English.
190
00:10:58,759 --> 00:11:01,159
- Did you hear the question, Potts?
- I did.
191
00:11:01,228 --> 00:11:03,321
As the verb
is always governed by the subject,
192
00:11:03,397 --> 00:11:05,831
the correct answer is,
"Two and two are five."
193
00:11:05,899 --> 00:11:08,424
- Potts.
- Oh, no, Potts.
194
00:11:08,502 --> 00:11:12,336
Correct for a grammarian perhaps,
but not for a mathematician.
195
00:11:12,406 --> 00:11:13,998
Two and two are four.
196
00:11:15,409 --> 00:11:18,401
That's a good one.
Nobody's gonna get that.
197
00:11:18,478 --> 00:11:20,070
Well, I certainly am obliged.
198
00:11:20,147 --> 00:11:22,047
I could use a bundle of scratch right now
199
00:11:22,115 --> 00:11:23,742
on account of I met me a mouse last week.
200
00:11:23,817 --> 00:11:25,307
- Mouse?
- What a pair of gams.
201
00:11:25,385 --> 00:11:27,683
A little in, a little out,
and a little more out...
202
00:11:27,754 --> 00:11:29,119
I am still completely mystified.
203
00:11:29,189 --> 00:11:30,588
Well, with this dish on me hands
204
00:11:30,657 --> 00:11:33,524
and them giving away 25 smackaroos
on that quizzola.
205
00:11:33,593 --> 00:11:37,120
- Smackaroos?
- Smackaroos? What are smackaroos?
206
00:11:37,197 --> 00:11:39,461
- A smackaroo is a...
- No such word exists.
207
00:11:39,533 --> 00:11:42,525
Oh, it don't? A smackaroo is a dollar, pal.
208
00:11:43,070 --> 00:11:45,561
Well, the accepted vulgarism
for a dollar is a buck.
209
00:11:45,639 --> 00:11:48,972
The accepted vulgarism
for a smackaroo is a dollar.
210
00:11:49,042 --> 00:11:52,102
That goes for a banger, a fish,
a buck or a rug.
211
00:11:52,179 --> 00:11:53,476
Well, what about the mouse?
212
00:11:53,547 --> 00:11:56,038
The mouse is the dish.
That's what I need the moolah for.
213
00:11:56,116 --> 00:11:57,447
- Moolah?
- Yeah, the dough.
214
00:11:57,517 --> 00:11:59,781
We'll be stepping. Me and this smooch...
I mean, the dish,
215
00:11:59,853 --> 00:12:02,481
I mean, the mouse. You know,
hit the jiggles for a little rum boogie.
216
00:12:02,556 --> 00:12:03,614
Please, please, not so fast.
217
00:12:03,690 --> 00:12:05,214
Brother, we're going to have
some hoytoytoy.
218
00:12:05,292 --> 00:12:06,350
- Hoytoytoy?
- Hoytoytoy?
219
00:12:06,426 --> 00:12:10,021
Yeah, and if you want that one explained,
you go ask your papas.
220
00:12:13,834 --> 00:12:16,632
That's Archie. His water's getting hot.
221
00:12:16,703 --> 00:12:18,295
Well, thanks again, gents.
222
00:12:18,371 --> 00:12:20,896
And if you ever want to get into
a contest sometime,
223
00:12:20,974 --> 00:12:22,669
just call on me.
224
00:12:22,743 --> 00:12:25,974
Maybe you've got the brains,
but I got the box covers.
225
00:12:26,446 --> 00:12:28,744
- Goodbye.
- Goodbye, come again.
226
00:12:30,183 --> 00:12:33,175
Well, kind of a breezy fellow, isn't he?
227
00:12:33,253 --> 00:12:34,242
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
228
00:12:34,321 --> 00:12:36,687
- He seems a most likeable gentleman.
- Yes.
229
00:12:36,757 --> 00:12:37,815
And I'm an idiot.
230
00:12:37,891 --> 00:12:39,552
- Idiot? Why?
- Why?
231
00:12:39,626 --> 00:12:41,253
Miss Bragg. Miss Bragg!
232
00:12:41,328 --> 00:12:42,795
- What's the matter, Potts?
- Well, what's...
233
00:12:42,863 --> 00:12:44,763
- I'm going out.
Going out?
234
00:12:44,831 --> 00:12:46,765
What's your prognosis
on the weather, Gurkakoff?
235
00:12:46,833 --> 00:12:49,301
- Light showers toward the evening, but...
- Yes, Professor Potts?
236
00:12:49,369 --> 00:12:51,030
Miss Bragg, my hat and my mackintosh.
237
00:12:51,104 --> 00:12:52,628
And put my luncheon sandwich
in the pocket.
238
00:12:52,706 --> 00:12:53,832
- But...
- Immediately.
239
00:12:53,907 --> 00:12:54,896
- Yes, sir.
- What's happened?
240
00:12:54,975 --> 00:12:56,636
What do you mean
you're going out, Potts?
241
00:12:56,710 --> 00:12:58,473
- Where are you going?
- Research.
242
00:12:58,545 --> 00:13:00,103
Research? What research?
243
00:13:00,180 --> 00:13:02,546
- The garbage man. Didn't you hear him?
- Yes.
244
00:13:02,616 --> 00:13:05,141
Well, I didn't quite understand all he said.
245
00:13:05,218 --> 00:13:08,415
Nor did I. And it's catastrophic, gentlemen,
catastrophic.
246
00:13:08,488 --> 00:13:09,853
- Why?
- How so?
247
00:13:09,923 --> 00:13:12,153
I've just finished my article on slang.
248
00:13:12,225 --> 00:13:15,194
Twenty-three pages compiled
from a dozen reference books.
249
00:13:15,262 --> 00:13:16,991
- Eight hundred examples.
- Well?
250
00:13:17,063 --> 00:13:19,463
Everything
from the idiotic combination "absotively"
251
00:13:19,533 --> 00:13:21,194
to the pejorative use of "zigzag."
252
00:13:21,268 --> 00:13:22,792
I traced the evolution of "hunky dory,"
253
00:13:22,869 --> 00:13:25,360
tracked down "skiddo" from "skedaddle."
254
00:13:25,739 --> 00:13:28,503
Eight hundred examples and I may as well
throw it in the waste basket.
255
00:13:28,575 --> 00:13:31,066
- Three weeks' work.
- Potts, you're hysterical.
256
00:13:31,144 --> 00:13:33,806
Outmoded.
Based on reference books 20 years old.
257
00:13:33,880 --> 00:13:36,747
Take "smooch." Take "dish." Take...
258
00:13:36,817 --> 00:13:40,218
- Hoytoytoy?
- Hoytoytoy. Not one of them included.
259
00:13:40,287 --> 00:13:43,381
Living in this house cut off from the world,
I've lost touch.
260
00:13:43,456 --> 00:13:44,821
And it's inexcusable.
261
00:13:44,891 --> 00:13:48,258
That man talked a living language.
I embalmed some dead phrases.
262
00:13:48,328 --> 00:13:51,263
- But where are you going?
- Out to collect new data,
263
00:13:51,331 --> 00:13:54,323
to tap the sources of slang,
the major sources.
264
00:13:54,401 --> 00:13:56,096
The streets. The slums.
265
00:13:56,169 --> 00:13:59,036
- The theatrical and allied professions.
- Oh, now, Potts, don't you think that...
266
00:13:59,105 --> 00:14:01,073
I know it's regrettable,
this loss of time, gentlemen,
267
00:14:01,141 --> 00:14:02,904
but it must be done.
268
00:14:05,045 --> 00:14:07,377
Leave the key under the mat.
I won't be home before 9:00.
269
00:14:07,447 --> 00:14:08,709
Yes, sir.
270
00:14:10,183 --> 00:14:12,811
I'm writing about the planet Saturn.
271
00:14:12,886 --> 00:14:15,719
Do I insist on going to the planet Saturn?
272
00:14:16,656 --> 00:14:20,717
Maybe my data on sex
is a little outdated, too.
273
00:14:22,729 --> 00:14:26,028
Just a moment, please.
Do you mind if I ride along with you?
274
00:14:26,099 --> 00:14:27,623
Hop on, buddy.
275
00:14:29,002 --> 00:14:32,062
Extra! Extra!
Nab Benny the Creep in cement killing!
276
00:14:32,138 --> 00:14:35,335
Read all about it.
Corpse's dogs dunked into cement.
277
00:14:35,408 --> 00:14:36,432
Extra! Extra!
278
00:14:37,811 --> 00:14:39,711
Ice-pick killing!
Link Benny the Creep with Big Tom!
279
00:14:39,779 --> 00:14:41,144
Extra! Extra!
280
00:14:41,214 --> 00:14:43,444
Seek man behind the man
behind the murder ring!
281
00:14:43,516 --> 00:14:45,381
Extra! Extra!
282
00:14:47,187 --> 00:14:49,121
Hey, what are you,
checking up on me or something?
283
00:14:49,189 --> 00:14:52,181
Four words, blitz it, mister.
Blitz it, will you? You give me the mimis.
284
00:14:52,259 --> 00:14:54,489
- "Mimis"?
- Yeah, the screaming mimis.
285
00:14:54,561 --> 00:14:55,619
Extremely picturesque.
286
00:14:55,695 --> 00:14:57,492
Young man,
could I interest you in a research project
287
00:14:57,564 --> 00:14:58,895
in which you could be very helpful?
288
00:14:58,965 --> 00:15:01,627
And what you promoting?
Some kind of reform school?
289
00:15:01,701 --> 00:15:03,931
If you would come to this address
at 9:30 tomorrow morning,
290
00:15:04,004 --> 00:15:06,131
you'd be doing society a definite service.
291
00:15:06,206 --> 00:15:08,436
Who are you anyway? Father Flanagan?
292
00:16:40,033 --> 00:16:41,057
293
00:17:37,257 --> 00:17:39,691
Come on, Krup, knock yourself out.
294
00:19:02,108 --> 00:19:05,271
Three, four, five,
295
00:19:05,345 --> 00:19:09,509
six, seven, eight,
296
00:19:09,582 --> 00:19:13,109
nine, ten, eleven,
297
00:19:13,186 --> 00:19:16,781
twelve, thirteen, fourteen.
298
00:19:25,398 --> 00:19:26,592
Yeah!
299
00:19:34,574 --> 00:19:37,304
Young man,
what is the name of that song?
300
00:19:37,377 --> 00:19:39,345
- Boogie.
- What does "boogie" mean?
301
00:19:39,412 --> 00:19:41,004
Are you kidding?
302
00:19:49,789 --> 00:19:52,053
More! More!
Yeah!
303
00:19:52,125 --> 00:19:54,992
- Okay, what do you want, hep cats?
- More of the same.
304
00:19:55,061 --> 00:19:56,358
- Same thing?
- Yeah.
305
00:19:56,429 --> 00:19:58,897
Okay, we'll mix it up a little.
Come on down, Krup.
306
00:19:58,965 --> 00:20:00,626
You're gonna have to be
awful quiet on this.
307
00:20:00,700 --> 00:20:02,167
I'm gonna need a little help,
okay, squares?
308
00:20:02,235 --> 00:20:03,497
- All right.
- All right.
309
00:20:03,570 --> 00:20:05,834
I want this chair,
and we'll clean off the table.
310
00:20:05,905 --> 00:20:07,463
A little juice down here, junior.
311
00:20:07,540 --> 00:20:09,701
- What's cooking, Sugar?
- Match boogie, Krup. How about it?
312
00:20:09,776 --> 00:20:11,209
Want match boogie? You'll get it.
Where's some matches?
313
00:20:11,277 --> 00:20:12,369
I have some right here.
314
00:20:17,317 --> 00:20:18,341
You two go with me,
315
00:20:18,418 --> 00:20:21,046
and the rest of you take boogie
with you on the orchestra, right?
316
00:20:21,120 --> 00:20:22,178
- Right.
- Okay.
317
00:20:22,255 --> 00:20:24,849
Here we go, Krup, like buster's gang.
318
00:20:24,924 --> 00:20:26,915
Very quiet. One, two.
319
00:20:27,393 --> 00:20:28,382
320
00:20:44,043 --> 00:20:45,237
Boogie.
321
00:21:16,276 --> 00:21:17,573
Yeah!
322
00:21:20,647 --> 00:21:22,638
Young man,
what is the name of that young lady?
323
00:21:22,715 --> 00:21:25,047
- Sugarpuss O'Shea.
- An astounding specimen.
324
00:21:25,118 --> 00:21:29,054
She jives by night, root, zoot and cute
and solid to boot.
325
00:21:29,122 --> 00:21:30,953
- Are you kidding?
- No.
326
00:21:32,659 --> 00:21:34,251
- Come on, Sugar, quick.
- Yeah, quick is right.
327
00:21:34,327 --> 00:21:35,351
What's the fever?
328
00:21:35,428 --> 00:21:36,759
Listen, Sugie, you gotta take it on the lam.
329
00:21:36,829 --> 00:21:37,818
- Yeah, they're looking for you.
- Who?
330
00:21:37,897 --> 00:21:39,023
- The District Attorney's office.
- Why?
331
00:21:39,098 --> 00:21:40,292
You've got to get dressed and out of here
332
00:21:40,366 --> 00:21:41,799
- before they slap a subpoena on you.
- A subpoena?
333
00:21:41,868 --> 00:21:43,563
Shh! Come on, we'll talk about it
in the dressing room.
334
00:21:43,636 --> 00:21:45,399
Well, why can't you tell me now?
335
00:21:47,674 --> 00:21:49,301
What is all this subpoena business?
336
00:21:49,375 --> 00:21:51,070
On account of
Benny the Creep had an accident.
337
00:21:51,144 --> 00:21:52,702
I never heard of Benny the Creep.
Who's he?
338
00:21:52,779 --> 00:21:54,337
- One of the boys.
- He was on kind of an errand
339
00:21:54,414 --> 00:21:56,109
when he grazed into a police car,
that dope.
340
00:21:56,182 --> 00:21:59,174
And for that I've got to hide out?
That don't make sense, Pastrami.
341
00:21:59,252 --> 00:22:01,186
No, you see,
when the bulls gave Benny a ticket,
342
00:22:01,254 --> 00:22:02,721
they saw Kinnick in the back of the car.
343
00:22:02,789 --> 00:22:03,949
- Dead.
- In the accident?
344
00:22:04,023 --> 00:22:05,547
That's what Benny was trying to tell them.
345
00:22:05,625 --> 00:22:07,786
- Only they saw Kinnick's feet.
- They was in a cake of cement.
346
00:22:07,860 --> 00:22:09,418
Benny was gonna dump him
in the East River.
347
00:22:09,495 --> 00:22:12,191
- That was the errand.
- What is all this? Where do I come...
348
00:22:12,265 --> 00:22:14,233
Wait a second.
Is Joe Lilac mixed up in this?
349
00:22:14,300 --> 00:22:15,927
The DA had him picked up
about a half hour ago.
350
00:22:16,002 --> 00:22:18,300
That's why we're here.
That's why you got to beat it.
351
00:22:18,371 --> 00:22:20,202
- Joe Lilac mixed up in a murder?
- Yeah.
352
00:22:20,273 --> 00:22:21,706
I don't believe it, not for a second.
353
00:22:21,774 --> 00:22:24,072
He was framed, Sugie, honest he was,
may I drop down dead.
354
00:22:24,143 --> 00:22:26,543
- Wasn't he, Asthma?
- And there was them pajamas they found.
355
00:22:26,612 --> 00:22:28,307
- Pajamas?
- Yeah, that's where you come in.
356
00:22:28,381 --> 00:22:30,941
Remember the dozen pink ones
you gave to the boss last Christmas?
357
00:22:31,017 --> 00:22:33,212
Before you knew
that the only color Joe Lilac wears is lilac?
358
00:22:33,286 --> 00:22:34,878
- Yeah.
- So we handed them out to the boys.
359
00:22:34,954 --> 00:22:37,980
And in the suitcase right beside
Benny the Creep when he gets caught
360
00:22:38,057 --> 00:22:40,150
is a pair with that big JL monogram.
361
00:22:43,529 --> 00:22:44,757
Who is it?
362
00:22:44,831 --> 00:22:47,857
I'd like to speak to Miss O'Shea
regarding an investigation I'm conducting.
363
00:22:48,067 --> 00:22:50,194
Okay, we'll take care of it.
364
00:22:50,536 --> 00:22:52,060
Just a minute.
365
00:22:56,743 --> 00:22:58,608
- How do you do, Miss O'Shea?
- Hello.
366
00:22:58,678 --> 00:23:00,578
I hate to intrude like this,
but mine is a very...
367
00:23:00,646 --> 00:23:01,840
Cut the corners. What is it?
368
00:23:01,914 --> 00:23:04,815
Well, this inquiry
is one of considerable importance.
369
00:23:04,884 --> 00:23:06,852
- Stop beating up with the gums.
- What was that?
370
00:23:06,919 --> 00:23:08,409
Get this. I don't know from nothing.
371
00:23:08,488 --> 00:23:11,184
Oh, but you do.
Every word you say proves as much.
372
00:23:11,257 --> 00:23:13,657
- Where's that paper?
- Subpoena?
373
00:23:13,726 --> 00:23:16,991
Suppose you tell the DA
to take a nice running jump for himself?
374
00:23:17,063 --> 00:23:20,191
Bewildering. And you want to tell me
you're not the person I'm looking for?
375
00:23:20,266 --> 00:23:23,929
- Say, how many of you are on this job?
- The entire project? Eight.
376
00:23:24,003 --> 00:23:27,131
Oh. The other seven waiting outside?
377
00:23:27,206 --> 00:23:29,197
Oh, no. They're at home.
Sound asleep I imagine.
378
00:23:29,275 --> 00:23:31,971
- Asleep?
- Yes, they go to bed at 9:00 every night.
379
00:23:32,044 --> 00:23:35,138
Do you mean to tell me
with crime what it is in New York...
380
00:23:35,214 --> 00:23:36,943
Say, are you a bull or aren't you?
381
00:23:37,016 --> 00:23:40,008
Well, if bull is the slang word
for professor, then I'm a bull.
382
00:23:40,086 --> 00:23:41,644
- A professor?
- Of English.
383
00:23:41,721 --> 00:23:42,710
Oh.
384
00:23:42,789 --> 00:23:44,950
I thought
there was some misunderstanding.
385
00:23:45,024 --> 00:23:46,150
Sure was.
386
00:23:46,225 --> 00:23:48,557
You see, I'm conducting an investigation
on current slang.
387
00:23:48,628 --> 00:23:51,426
Would you object
if I used you for observation and study?
388
00:23:51,497 --> 00:23:53,192
- Yeah, I would.
- If I could have your assistance
389
00:23:53,266 --> 00:23:54,358
for just a few days it would be...
390
00:23:54,434 --> 00:23:55,992
Out, out, Professor.
391
00:23:56,068 --> 00:23:58,468
- Then you won't help me?
- No. Out. Shove in your clutch.
392
00:23:58,538 --> 00:24:00,870
"Shove in your clutch."
Exactly the kind of thing I want.
393
00:24:00,940 --> 00:24:03,408
Perhaps if I could come back here again
when you have more time...
394
00:24:03,476 --> 00:24:05,740
Save the gas. I won't be here after tonight.
395
00:24:05,812 --> 00:24:08,337
Well, look,
here's the address of the Foundation
396
00:24:08,414 --> 00:24:10,507
if you should happen
to change your mind by any chance.
397
00:24:10,583 --> 00:24:12,710
- It's my residence, as well.
- Listen, not now.
398
00:24:12,785 --> 00:24:16,346
- Well, I'll just leave it here.
- Okay, scrow, scram, scraw.
399
00:24:16,422 --> 00:24:19,516
The complete conjugation.
All right, I'll scraw.
400
00:24:21,527 --> 00:24:23,586
Stop futzing around.
You haven't got time to get dressed.
401
00:24:23,663 --> 00:24:25,187
- All right. Only I...
- We'll go out the window.
402
00:24:25,264 --> 00:24:26,925
I think you're a pair of cracked dice.
403
00:24:30,136 --> 00:24:31,933
- Excuse me.
- Look out, mister.
404
00:24:37,276 --> 00:24:38,641
Good night.
405
00:24:39,812 --> 00:24:42,110
- Miss O'Shea.
- What do you want?
406
00:24:43,349 --> 00:24:44,782
Right there.
407
00:24:51,591 --> 00:24:54,116
Open up. District Attorney's office.
408
00:25:06,472 --> 00:25:08,997
- Where to?
- Just keep cruising, Jack.
409
00:25:10,076 --> 00:25:13,273
- Well?
- How about that warehouse on West 11th?
410
00:25:13,346 --> 00:25:14,779
- No. Too many rats.
- Hey, wait a minute.
411
00:25:14,847 --> 00:25:17,077
- Where are you taking me?
- It's just for the night, Sugarpuss.
412
00:25:17,149 --> 00:25:19,140
We can't take you to your place,
they'll have it covered.
413
00:25:19,218 --> 00:25:21,482
Joe's apartment,
they got sealed up like a can of coffee.
414
00:25:21,554 --> 00:25:24,114
Oh, I see.
Yeah, but you live someplace, don't you?
415
00:25:24,190 --> 00:25:25,589
Yeah, sure and the cops know where.
416
00:25:25,658 --> 00:25:29,059
Yeah, hotel, I thought of a hotel,
but they'll fan every hotel in town.
417
00:25:29,128 --> 00:25:30,425
Well, I could change my name.
418
00:25:30,496 --> 00:25:33,988
Listen, Sugie, why take chances?
It's an awful nice warehouse.
419
00:25:34,066 --> 00:25:37,399
He says rats, big mouth does.
Well, maybe a few little bitty mice.
420
00:25:37,470 --> 00:25:38,459
Uh-uh. That's out.
421
00:25:38,538 --> 00:25:41,598
Tomorrow we'll get hold of a lawyer
and figure out something with more class.
422
00:25:41,674 --> 00:25:43,505
Say, I got an uncle who's an undertaker
423
00:25:43,576 --> 00:25:45,806
and with business like it is,
he's always got an extra slab.
424
00:25:45,878 --> 00:25:48,870
That's fine. That's all I need.
Keep thinking.
425
00:25:49,982 --> 00:25:51,711
Hey, what's this?
426
00:25:51,784 --> 00:25:54,378
"Bertram Potts..."
Oh, that's that professor jerk.
427
00:25:58,991 --> 00:25:59,980
Uh-oh.
428
00:26:05,398 --> 00:26:07,389
I never would have believed it.
429
00:26:07,466 --> 00:26:09,263
But how do you account for the name?
430
00:26:09,335 --> 00:26:10,825
Have I missed anything?
431
00:26:10,903 --> 00:26:12,768
No, I was just about to explain...
432
00:26:12,838 --> 00:26:15,272
- You see, the word "puss" means face.
- Yes.
433
00:26:15,341 --> 00:26:17,935
As for instance, sourpuss, picklepuss.
434
00:26:18,711 --> 00:26:21,373
Sugarpuss implies
a certain sweetness in her appearance.
435
00:26:21,447 --> 00:26:22,436
- Sugar, yes, yes.
- Yes.
436
00:26:22,515 --> 00:26:24,073
Never mind the etymology.
437
00:26:24,150 --> 00:26:25,742
- Was she...
- Was she blonde or brunette?
438
00:26:25,818 --> 00:26:28,616
- Yes, which?
- That, I don't know. I didn't notice.
439
00:26:29,055 --> 00:26:31,080
But her vocabulary,
even in ordinary conversation...
440
00:26:31,157 --> 00:26:32,988
You spoke to her?
441
00:26:33,059 --> 00:26:34,856
- Yes, in her dressing room...
- In her dressing room?
442
00:26:34,927 --> 00:26:36,758
- Backstage?
- Yes.
443
00:26:36,829 --> 00:26:40,492
Unfortunately,
she disclaimed any interest in our project
444
00:26:42,134 --> 00:26:45,001
in words so bizarre
they made my mouth water.
445
00:26:45,071 --> 00:26:47,938
- "Shove in your clutch," for instance.
- Why, it's amazing.
446
00:26:48,007 --> 00:26:50,032
Potts, could you tell us
what was it like backstage?
447
00:26:50,109 --> 00:26:51,872
Very vivacious, I imagine.
448
00:26:51,944 --> 00:26:56,438
And perhaps, ballerinas giggling
up and down iron staircases.
449
00:26:56,515 --> 00:26:58,073
Around and around.
450
00:26:58,150 --> 00:27:00,778
- Possibly wearing tights.
- Tights.
451
00:27:00,853 --> 00:27:03,947
And that ineffable smell of rice powder.
452
00:27:04,023 --> 00:27:05,684
On nude shoulders.
453
00:27:07,426 --> 00:27:08,552
Well.
454
00:27:09,629 --> 00:27:11,494
It's getting a bit late, gentlemen.
455
00:27:11,564 --> 00:27:13,759
Perhaps we had better get to bed.
456
00:27:22,341 --> 00:27:24,309
Someday, I'll tell you my experiences
457
00:27:24,377 --> 00:27:26,242
with a young actress
named Lillian Russell.
458
00:27:26,312 --> 00:27:27,336
Did you know her?
459
00:27:27,413 --> 00:27:29,347
I stood in the snow four hours to get to...
460
00:27:30,516 --> 00:27:32,416
Is that our doorbell?
461
00:27:32,485 --> 00:27:33,952
But it's 12:25.
462
00:27:34,020 --> 00:27:37,319
It must be the statistics
on San Salvador's saltpeter.
463
00:27:37,657 --> 00:27:38,646
I'll get it.
464
00:27:38,724 --> 00:27:41,784
I asked for it to be sent registered airmail.
465
00:27:45,164 --> 00:27:46,426
Hi-de-ho.
466
00:27:47,600 --> 00:27:49,898
Don't tell me I'm too late for class,
Professor.
467
00:27:49,969 --> 00:27:50,958
Oh, my goodness gracious.
468
00:27:52,271 --> 00:27:53,863
Say, what is that?
469
00:27:55,107 --> 00:27:57,302
- Those are my colleagues.
- Oh.
470
00:27:58,077 --> 00:28:01,513
- I apologize for their lack of costume.
- Oh, that's all right, Professor.
471
00:28:01,580 --> 00:28:03,343
And the fact
that I haven't got my tie on and...
472
00:28:03,416 --> 00:28:06,647
Oh, you know,
once I watched my big brother shave.
473
00:28:08,454 --> 00:28:10,581
- Won't you come in?
- Why not?
474
00:28:11,624 --> 00:28:14,684
Frankly, your coming here
was the last thing I expected.
475
00:28:14,760 --> 00:28:16,022
Your "no" was so explicit.
476
00:28:16,095 --> 00:28:17,585
Well, I got thinking it over
477
00:28:17,663 --> 00:28:20,257
and "Foo," I said to myself,
"Who am I to give science the brush?"
478
00:28:20,332 --> 00:28:23,859
- Then I take it you've reconsidered?
- Yeah, that's the big idea.
479
00:28:23,936 --> 00:28:25,062
Well.
480
00:28:25,871 --> 00:28:27,600
Oh, dear. Oh, dear.
481
00:28:28,507 --> 00:28:29,769
Look out.
482
00:28:31,010 --> 00:28:34,639
- Well, that was Professor Oddly.
- Any more of them around?
483
00:28:34,714 --> 00:28:36,113
I hope not.
484
00:28:36,849 --> 00:28:39,044
Say, who decorated this place?
485
00:28:40,453 --> 00:28:42,080
- The mug that shot Lincoln?
- This is our work room.
486
00:28:42,688 --> 00:28:44,849
The living quarters are upstairs.
487
00:28:44,924 --> 00:28:47,950
That's a lot of books. All of them different?
488
00:28:48,060 --> 00:28:49,049
- I trust.
- Uh-huh.
489
00:28:49,161 --> 00:28:51,686
- May I have your coat?
- Yeah, thanks.
490
00:28:53,199 --> 00:28:54,598
Miss O'Shea.
491
00:28:56,602 --> 00:29:00,732
Greek philosophy,
I've got a set like this with a radio inside.
492
00:29:01,173 --> 00:29:03,266
Are you sure you don't want your coat?
493
00:29:03,342 --> 00:29:06,368
No, I'm fine.
Except I've got a run in this stocking.
494
00:29:06,445 --> 00:29:07,969
Well, how do we start, Professor?
495
00:29:08,047 --> 00:29:11,175
You see, this is the first time
anybody moved in on my brain.
496
00:29:11,250 --> 00:29:13,514
Have you got some kind of a machine,
497
00:29:13,586 --> 00:29:16,714
an X-ray or a vacuum cleaner maybe
that sorts out the words you want?
498
00:29:16,789 --> 00:29:18,347
What's your method, Professor?
499
00:29:18,424 --> 00:29:21,723
Well, it's quite simple. If you will be here
tomorrow morning not later than 9:30...
500
00:29:21,794 --> 00:29:22,783
Tomorrow morning?
501
00:29:22,862 --> 00:29:25,592
Why, yes.
I have arranged a round table discussion
502
00:29:25,664 --> 00:29:28,462
with a few people of various backgrounds.
503
00:29:28,534 --> 00:29:29,660
Uh-huh.
504
00:29:29,735 --> 00:29:33,535
You don't think we could sort of
begin the Beguine right now?
505
00:29:33,606 --> 00:29:35,699
Well, it's nearly 1:00, Miss O'Shea.
506
00:29:35,775 --> 00:29:37,868
Oh, foo, Professor,
let's get ourselves a couple of drinks,
507
00:29:37,943 --> 00:29:40,673
light the fire maybe, and you can start
working on me right away.
508
00:29:40,746 --> 00:29:44,011
I wouldn't think of imposing upon you
at this hour.
509
00:29:44,083 --> 00:29:46,950
Listen, I figured on working all night.
510
00:29:47,019 --> 00:29:50,614
Well, any hasty random discussion
would be of no scientific value.
511
00:29:50,689 --> 00:29:52,623
You see, I have to have my notes
thoroughly prepared
512
00:29:52,691 --> 00:29:54,716
for the seminar tomorrow.
513
00:29:55,361 --> 00:29:57,295
Okay. Where do I sleep?
514
00:29:58,030 --> 00:29:59,759
I don't know. Where do you live?
515
00:29:59,832 --> 00:30:01,561
Up on Riverside.
But I'm going to sleep here.
516
00:30:01,634 --> 00:30:02,828
Here?
517
00:30:02,902 --> 00:30:04,836
You don't understand, Miss O'Shea.
518
00:30:04,904 --> 00:30:08,806
We're all bachelors with the exception
of Professor Oddly, who is a widower.
519
00:30:08,874 --> 00:30:10,637
Why, no woman ever...
520
00:30:11,210 --> 00:30:13,303
Even Miss Bragg who takes care
of our needs
521
00:30:13,379 --> 00:30:15,711
goes home every night at 7:30.
522
00:30:15,781 --> 00:30:18,272
If you want me
tomorrow morning at 9:30, you...
523
00:30:18,350 --> 00:30:20,250
Oh, I do, Miss O'Shea.
524
00:30:22,555 --> 00:30:26,047
Even the most free-thinking people
must respect the...
525
00:30:27,193 --> 00:30:28,990
All right, feel that.
526
00:30:29,528 --> 00:30:31,393
Go on. Feel that foot.
527
00:30:32,932 --> 00:30:35,423
Okay, tootsie bell, what do you say?
528
00:30:35,501 --> 00:30:37,992
- It's cold.
- It's cold and it's wet.
529
00:30:39,638 --> 00:30:41,196
Now, come here.
530
00:30:43,309 --> 00:30:44,640
Come here.
531
00:30:47,246 --> 00:30:48,474
Closer.
532
00:30:50,115 --> 00:30:51,309
Closer.
533
00:30:52,117 --> 00:30:54,085
Come on, give.
534
00:30:54,153 --> 00:30:56,747
Hello, kids. Look down my throat.
535
00:30:56,822 --> 00:30:58,414
Go on. Look down.
536
00:30:58,490 --> 00:31:00,390
All right, right down there, look.
537
00:31:00,459 --> 00:31:02,620
I don't know what to look for.
538
00:31:02,695 --> 00:31:06,722
There is possibly a slight rosiness
in the laryngeal region.
539
00:31:06,799 --> 00:31:08,289
Slight rosiness?
540
00:31:08,367 --> 00:31:10,767
It's as red as the Daily Worker
and just as sore.
541
00:31:10,836 --> 00:31:12,360
- Who are you?
- I'm...
542
00:31:12,438 --> 00:31:13,598
Who is he?
543
00:31:13,672 --> 00:31:17,108
This is Dr. Magenbruch,
our physiological expert.
544
00:31:17,176 --> 00:31:19,007
This is Professor Robinson, law.
545
00:31:19,078 --> 00:31:22,912
- Professor Gurkakoff...
- Not so fast. Just let it creep up on me.
546
00:31:22,982 --> 00:31:24,381
I'll get to know them.
547
00:31:24,450 --> 00:31:27,681
Come here, physiology.
For all I know, I've got a fever. Feel.
548
00:31:27,753 --> 00:31:29,015
- It's possible.
- Certainly.
549
00:31:29,088 --> 00:31:31,488
And he wants to throw me out on my tin.
550
00:31:31,557 --> 00:31:34,321
There'll be no 9:30 for me
if you let me go out in the rain now.
551
00:31:34,393 --> 00:31:35,417
Naturally not.
552
00:31:35,494 --> 00:31:37,894
With the streets cold
and the subway hot and full of germs.
553
00:31:37,963 --> 00:31:40,397
I'm a push-over for streptococcus.
554
00:31:40,900 --> 00:31:43,494
- Can I have this now, kid?
- Pardon me.
555
00:31:44,370 --> 00:31:47,669
We'll call you a heated taxi and furnish you
with woolen socks and warm slippers.
556
00:31:47,740 --> 00:31:50,174
- How do you like that?
- Really, I don't understand you, Potts.
557
00:31:50,242 --> 00:31:52,574
- Why take chances?
- With valuable material?
558
00:31:52,645 --> 00:31:55,546
- You must think of your article, Potts.
- See, they get the point.
559
00:31:55,614 --> 00:31:57,741
If I might venture a suggestion,
560
00:31:57,850 --> 00:31:59,579
why couldn't the young lady
sleep in my room?
561
00:31:59,652 --> 00:32:00,846
- What?
- What?
562
00:32:00,920 --> 00:32:03,047
- Well!
- Professor Peagram!
563
00:32:03,822 --> 00:32:05,756
I can bunk in with Professor Robinson.
564
00:32:05,824 --> 00:32:07,655
I sometimes do
when there's an electric storm.
565
00:32:07,726 --> 00:32:09,523
Yes, he's afraid of thunder.
566
00:32:09,595 --> 00:32:11,927
Well, then it's all settled.
567
00:32:11,997 --> 00:32:15,262
Well, I guess I'll turn in.
Can I have my coat?
568
00:32:15,334 --> 00:32:17,928
- Of course.
- Thank you.
569
00:32:18,003 --> 00:32:20,062
- Hi-de-ho, fellows.
- Hi-de-ho.
570
00:32:20,906 --> 00:32:23,704
- I'll show you to my room.
- Yes, we all will go.
571
00:32:23,776 --> 00:32:25,141
I know where my own room is, thank you,
572
00:32:25,210 --> 00:32:27,303
- without any help from you.
- Why shouldn't... Why shouldn't...
573
00:32:27,379 --> 00:32:30,041
I'll find it. Don't bother.
Just rough out the directions.
574
00:32:30,115 --> 00:32:32,743
Top of the stairs
and the third door on the left.
575
00:32:32,818 --> 00:32:34,683
Gentlemen, just a moment, please.
576
00:32:34,753 --> 00:32:36,277
Gentlemen, this is all highly irregular.
577
00:32:36,355 --> 00:32:38,482
What if this should come
to the attention of the Foundation?
578
00:32:38,557 --> 00:32:39,922
And what about Miss Bragg tomorrow?
579
00:32:39,992 --> 00:32:42,552
What are you talking about?
This is research, isn't it?
580
00:32:42,628 --> 00:32:43,890
- Yes.
- Certainly.
581
00:32:43,963 --> 00:32:46,693
Who was that guy learned so much
from watching an apple drop?
582
00:32:46,765 --> 00:32:50,826
Isaac Newton, 1642 to 1727.
583
00:32:50,903 --> 00:32:53,565
- The law of gravity.
- Yeah, that's him.
584
00:32:54,139 --> 00:32:58,235
And I want you to look at me
as another apple, Professor Potts.
585
00:32:58,310 --> 00:33:00,039
Just another apple.
586
00:33:08,887 --> 00:33:10,752
It fits you like a glove,
you admit that, don't you?
587
00:33:10,823 --> 00:33:14,122
I like a little more effect around
the shoulders, sort of a puffed sleeve.
588
00:33:14,193 --> 00:33:17,754
- You know that JL could be Joe Lilac.
- Could be.
589
00:33:18,297 --> 00:33:21,391
- Still claim it isn't yours?
- No, it isn't and never was.
590
00:33:21,467 --> 00:33:24,493
Come on, loosen up, Joe.
It's 5:00 in the morning.
591
00:33:24,570 --> 00:33:26,902
How's about a little Benzedrine?
592
00:33:26,972 --> 00:33:29,065
- Put it on Benny the Creep.
- Sure.
593
00:33:29,141 --> 00:33:30,472
Take off your coat.
594
00:33:30,542 --> 00:33:33,943
I should have brought along my valet.
I'm a sucker for comfort.
595
00:33:34,013 --> 00:33:36,675
Why, don't worry, Joe.
You'll have your comfort.
596
00:33:36,749 --> 00:33:41,152
We'll have platinum bars on your cell,
and we'll heat up a chair for you, special.
597
00:33:41,253 --> 00:33:42,777
Twenty thousand volts.
598
00:33:44,256 --> 00:33:45,518
AC or DC?
599
00:33:49,261 --> 00:33:51,786
- So those are your pajamas, huh?
- Yep.
600
00:33:52,631 --> 00:33:55,191
You always wear them
three sizes too big?
601
00:33:55,267 --> 00:33:59,533
Allows for my chest expansion.
And my fingers get kind of chilly at night.
602
00:33:59,605 --> 00:34:01,539
And the JL?
603
00:34:02,775 --> 00:34:05,869
It stands for jellybean.
It stands for lollipop.
604
00:34:07,179 --> 00:34:09,010
- Take him away.
- Come on.
605
00:34:09,081 --> 00:34:11,208
That's fine. That's great.
606
00:34:12,484 --> 00:34:15,647
You never heard of Benny the Creep.
Benny the Creep never heard of you.
607
00:34:15,721 --> 00:34:17,985
There was no murder.
And there is no murder ring
608
00:34:18,057 --> 00:34:21,288
with you at the control boards
pushing the buttons.
609
00:34:21,827 --> 00:34:23,556
- Good morning, Joe.
- Hiya, McNeary?
610
00:34:23,629 --> 00:34:25,790
Morning, and pardon my glove,
Mr. District Attorney.
611
00:34:25,864 --> 00:34:27,491
Good morning.
612
00:34:27,566 --> 00:34:32,003
- All right, I've got a writ of habeas corpus.
- I've forgotten my reading glasses.
613
00:34:32,071 --> 00:34:34,232
Too bad. Come on, Joe.
614
00:34:34,306 --> 00:34:36,297
May be a couple of days
before I find them.
615
00:34:36,375 --> 00:34:39,503
- I won't stand for my client's...
- It's all right, McNeary.
616
00:34:39,578 --> 00:34:41,546
The man's trying to clean up the city.
617
00:34:41,613 --> 00:34:43,808
Why not give him
all the cooperation we can?
618
00:34:43,882 --> 00:34:47,340
- Does that mean you're going to talk, Joe?
- What about?
619
00:34:48,187 --> 00:34:50,712
Well, I'll make the pajamas talk.
620
00:34:50,789 --> 00:34:52,780
Here's the sales slip for them.
621
00:34:52,858 --> 00:34:55,918
They were bought by Miss O'Shea.
She bought them for you.
622
00:34:55,994 --> 00:34:59,088
Or maybe you never heard of her.
Maybe she isn't your girlfriend.
623
00:34:59,164 --> 00:35:03,362
- Why bring a lady's name into this?
- I'll bring the lady in herself.
624
00:35:05,504 --> 00:35:08,371
Where do we stand with that O'Shea girl?
What?
625
00:35:08,440 --> 00:35:09,839
What about the deputies?
626
00:35:09,908 --> 00:35:11,535
All right, let me talk to Collins himself.
627
00:35:11,610 --> 00:35:13,134
- What about the girl?
- Don't worry.
628
00:35:13,212 --> 00:35:15,578
We've got her in safe deposit temporarily.
629
00:35:15,647 --> 00:35:18,810
- Temporarily is not good enough.
- I've got something figured out.
630
00:35:18,884 --> 00:35:20,977
- Nothing gloomy, I hope.
- Strictly legal.
631
00:35:21,053 --> 00:35:22,577
A wife can't testify against her husband.
632
00:35:22,654 --> 00:35:24,349
- She's not my wife.
- Not yet, she isn't.
633
00:35:24,423 --> 00:35:26,653
But once they let you go,
we'll pull a fastie.
634
00:35:26,725 --> 00:35:28,056
Of all the incompetent...
635
00:35:28,127 --> 00:35:29,856
What sweetheart dreamed up that law?
636
00:35:29,928 --> 00:35:33,989
Don't give me that. You've had six hours.
Tell those guys to get a jump on.
637
00:35:36,768 --> 00:35:38,360
Having some trouble, Mr. DA?
638
00:35:38,437 --> 00:35:39,768
Don't worry, Joe.
639
00:35:39,838 --> 00:35:42,807
And don't underestimate this office
or the State of New York.
640
00:35:42,875 --> 00:35:45,935
I've got some boys
that can find a needle in a haystack.
641
00:35:46,011 --> 00:35:47,205
Why, that's a cinch.
642
00:35:47,279 --> 00:35:51,579
All you have to do is get a horse
to eat the hay and then X-ray the horse.
643
00:35:58,957 --> 00:36:00,720
Okay. Okay.
644
00:36:02,261 --> 00:36:03,888
Hold your horses.
645
00:36:06,765 --> 00:36:09,029
- Good morning.
- Good morning.
646
00:36:09,134 --> 00:36:11,967
What time is it?
This is worse than being in the army.
647
00:36:12,037 --> 00:36:15,006
Professor Potts started
the round table discussion 10 minutes ago.
648
00:36:15,073 --> 00:36:17,439
He did? Say, that's divastigating.
649
00:36:17,509 --> 00:36:20,205
- And this came for you.
- Who brought it?
650
00:36:20,712 --> 00:36:23,180
- A couple of persons.
- Any message?
651
00:36:23,248 --> 00:36:26,308
- Well, they spoke very picturesquely.
- Yeah, very.
652
00:36:26,385 --> 00:36:29,479
Yes, they said it's getting hot and hotter
653
00:36:29,555 --> 00:36:32,353
and to stay in the icebox
like a good little salad.
654
00:36:32,424 --> 00:36:34,688
And this is the dressing.
655
00:36:34,760 --> 00:36:37,285
- The salad, huh?
- And we wondered what it meant.
656
00:36:37,362 --> 00:36:38,386
Yes, we did.
657
00:36:38,463 --> 00:36:40,260
I'll tell you, sweetie. I...
658
00:36:40,332 --> 00:36:41,697
Gentlemen. Gentlemen.
659
00:36:41,767 --> 00:36:43,394
- Miss Bragg.
- Oh, my goodness.
660
00:36:43,468 --> 00:36:45,766
Sounds like Mother calling.
Kids, you better go.
661
00:36:45,837 --> 00:36:47,771
See you later.
662
00:36:47,839 --> 00:36:51,832
- Gentlemen, where are you, gentlemen?
- We're coming, Miss Bragg, we're coming.
663
00:36:51,910 --> 00:36:54,378
- On our way.
- I would like to talk to you.
664
00:36:54,446 --> 00:36:55,435
I wanted to ask you,
665
00:36:55,514 --> 00:36:57,482
what were all your trousers
doing in my kitchen?
666
00:36:57,549 --> 00:36:59,847
- I wanted mine pressed.
- Well, that accounts for one pair.
667
00:36:59,918 --> 00:37:01,715
- I did, too.
- Mine, too.
668
00:37:01,787 --> 00:37:03,652
Seven pairs, all at once?
669
00:37:03,722 --> 00:37:05,781
What's going on in this house anyway?
670
00:37:05,857 --> 00:37:08,849
No constitutional this morning.
You've hardly touched your breakfast.
671
00:37:08,927 --> 00:37:12,260
Professor Potts in the dining room with
a conglomeration of dubious characters.
672
00:37:12,331 --> 00:37:13,457
You, not at your desks.
673
00:37:13,532 --> 00:37:17,059
- That's right, gentlemen, we have to work.
- Yes, we have to work.
674
00:37:17,135 --> 00:37:22,038
- What were you doing upstairs, anyway?
- We took up a suitcase.
675
00:37:22,107 --> 00:37:23,836
- Suitcase?
- Yes.
676
00:37:23,909 --> 00:37:26,173
- Whose suitcase?
- We're very busy, Miss Bragg.
677
00:37:26,245 --> 00:37:27,439
I said, whose suitcase?
678
00:37:27,512 --> 00:37:30,845
Well, now, Miss Bragg, there is...
679
00:37:32,584 --> 00:37:35,018
- There is someone staying with us.
- Staying with us?
680
00:37:35,087 --> 00:37:37,920
- That's it.
- Who?
681
00:37:37,990 --> 00:37:39,389
Who's staying with us?
682
00:37:39,458 --> 00:37:41,653
What's the matter? Cat got your tongues?
683
00:37:41,727 --> 00:37:43,854
- Who's staying with us?
- Well, I...
684
00:37:43,929 --> 00:37:47,365
- Well, I... Oh, dear.
- Professor Potts didn't tell you?
685
00:37:47,432 --> 00:37:49,764
- No, and I want to know.
- Well, under the pressure
686
00:37:49,835 --> 00:37:52,030
- of a very trying assignment...
- Yes?
687
00:37:52,104 --> 00:37:54,368
- He's...
- Go on.
688
00:37:54,439 --> 00:37:57,067
- He's taken a temporary assistant.
- Yes.
689
00:37:57,142 --> 00:38:00,043
- So we're running a hotel now.
- Not exactly.
690
00:38:00,112 --> 00:38:03,240
It seems to me that... Professor Robinson,
691
00:38:03,315 --> 00:38:06,648
- is that one of your socks?
- No, not mine.
692
00:38:07,452 --> 00:38:09,079
I wish that it...
693
00:38:10,722 --> 00:38:14,021
Well, I know Professor Peagram
explains the corset he wears
694
00:38:14,092 --> 00:38:15,491
as due to a floating kidney.
695
00:38:15,560 --> 00:38:16,959
What's the explanation of this?
696
00:38:17,029 --> 00:38:21,329
Say, kids, I'm stuck.
Any of you can jerk a zipper?
697
00:38:21,400 --> 00:38:22,628
A zipper?
698
00:38:22,701 --> 00:38:25,067
Yeah, the darn thing's stuck...
699
00:38:25,137 --> 00:38:26,866
Hello, who are you?
700
00:38:26,938 --> 00:38:30,465
- This is our Miss Bragg.
- Miss... Did you say Bag?
701
00:38:30,542 --> 00:38:32,100
Bragg. How do you do?
702
00:38:32,177 --> 00:38:34,111
Great-o.
Do you know anything about zippers?
703
00:38:34,179 --> 00:38:35,578
- Do you? Do you?
- Well, I...
704
00:38:35,647 --> 00:38:36,944
- Well, do you?
- Do I?
705
00:38:37,015 --> 00:38:40,416
- No, I don't, but Professor Gurkakoff.
- Okay.
706
00:38:40,485 --> 00:38:43,511
- Well, it's purely mechanical.
- But look, you were married.
707
00:38:43,588 --> 00:38:44,782
No, I'm just a botanist.
708
00:38:44,856 --> 00:38:47,188
Look, kids, after all,
you know, this is only a zipper.
709
00:38:47,259 --> 00:38:49,489
- Come on, Gurky.
- Well, I can try.
710
00:38:49,561 --> 00:38:51,825
You know, I had this happen one night
in the middle of my act.
711
00:38:51,897 --> 00:38:54,730
I couldn't get a thing off,
was I embarrassed.
712
00:38:54,800 --> 00:38:56,199
How's chances for a cup of coffee?
713
00:38:56,268 --> 00:38:59,260
- No breakfast after 9:00.
- You see, it's a rule.
714
00:38:59,338 --> 00:39:02,432
Just like my Aunt Beulah that
brought me up, that's why I left home.
715
00:39:02,507 --> 00:39:03,496
- There.
- Oh, swell.
716
00:39:03,575 --> 00:39:05,338
Now where is this little clambake
of Professor Potts'?
717
00:39:05,410 --> 00:39:08,811
- In the dining room, just across the hall.
- In the dining room. See you later, kids.
718
00:39:13,685 --> 00:39:16,848
Don't tell me the jive session
has beat off without baby.
719
00:39:16,922 --> 00:39:19,390
Shut the door please, Miss O'Shea.
720
00:39:22,894 --> 00:39:23,918
You're late.
721
00:39:23,995 --> 00:39:26,190
I won't waste time with introductions.
These are our collaborators.
722
00:39:26,264 --> 00:39:27,788
- Hi, kids.
- Hi.
723
00:39:27,866 --> 00:39:30,391
As I was saying, I've worked out
a series of cross-references
724
00:39:30,469 --> 00:39:32,562
which I believe will be the best approach
to our subject.
725
00:39:32,637 --> 00:39:34,070
Going like gangbusters, isn't he?
726
00:39:34,139 --> 00:39:35,800
Sit down, please.
727
00:39:39,144 --> 00:39:42,341
I don't think
you'll find our venture dull, Miss O'Shea.
728
00:39:42,414 --> 00:39:46,248
The scientific conquest of
an important subject is never dull.
729
00:39:47,018 --> 00:39:49,680
"Slang," as the poet
Carl Sandburg has said,
730
00:39:49,755 --> 00:39:51,416
"is language which takes off its coat,
731
00:39:51,490 --> 00:39:53,651
"spits on its hands and goes to work."
732
00:39:53,725 --> 00:39:56,626
Let us... Let us, too,
then get down to work.
733
00:40:03,301 --> 00:40:06,202
Well, we've accomplished a lot
in the last three days,
734
00:40:06,271 --> 00:40:08,796
and I'm very grateful to all of you.
735
00:40:08,874 --> 00:40:11,365
There's another word
I'd like to take up now.
736
00:40:11,443 --> 00:40:13,502
It's recurred several times
in our discussions,
737
00:40:13,578 --> 00:40:15,569
and its meaning still eludes me.
738
00:40:15,647 --> 00:40:17,239
I think it was Miss O'Shea
who used it yesterday
739
00:40:17,315 --> 00:40:19,943
in reference to the cuffs that I wear.
740
00:40:20,018 --> 00:40:22,748
- The word is "corny."
- Yeah, wouldn't you say they were corny?
741
00:40:22,821 --> 00:40:26,188
- Because of the cornstarch in them?
- Because it's 1941.
742
00:40:26,925 --> 00:40:30,884
- Then corny means old-fashioned.
- Kind of hick, loose-tooth.
743
00:40:30,962 --> 00:40:32,486
Mortimer Snerd.
744
00:40:33,298 --> 00:40:34,856
Oh, gee.
745
00:40:35,467 --> 00:40:37,128
There's other kinds of corn, too.
746
00:40:37,202 --> 00:40:38,863
When you give your girl
your fraternity pin,
747
00:40:38,937 --> 00:40:41,235
well, if she says, "I'll keep it forever,"
748
00:40:41,306 --> 00:40:43,570
- that's corny, too.
- Yeah, or take a joke.
749
00:40:43,642 --> 00:40:45,439
"That's no lady, that's my wife."
750
00:40:45,510 --> 00:40:47,842
Making your baby's shoes into ashtrays.
751
00:40:47,913 --> 00:40:49,278
- That's corn.
- Right off the cob.
752
00:40:49,347 --> 00:40:51,645
Well, let's stick to corn.
753
00:40:51,716 --> 00:40:53,581
Is it synonymous with baloney?
754
00:40:53,652 --> 00:40:56,746
No, it's anything
that gets them in the sticks.
755
00:40:56,822 --> 00:40:59,416
"Long time, no see," that's Indian corn.
756
00:40:59,491 --> 00:41:01,049
Yeah, when a guy comes to see a girl
and says,
757
00:41:01,126 --> 00:41:02,957
"Let's turn off the lights,
it hurts my eyes."
758
00:41:03,028 --> 00:41:04,723
Brother, that's corn.
759
00:41:04,796 --> 00:41:07,856
The implication is
he's trying to pull some hoytoytoy.
760
00:41:07,933 --> 00:41:11,892
- You're catching on, Professor.
- Countrified, old-fashioned, sentimental.
761
00:41:24,916 --> 00:41:26,406
Business kind of peaked, Jack?
762
00:41:26,485 --> 00:41:29,386
Yeah, it takes up a lot of time
being on the faculty.
763
00:41:29,454 --> 00:41:31,422
- I'll buy the heap.
- There's no call for you to do that.
764
00:41:31,490 --> 00:41:33,321
Why not?
I want to line my bureau drawers.
765
00:41:33,391 --> 00:41:34,517
Gee, thanks.
766
00:41:35,293 --> 00:41:38,524
- Back in a second, Professor.
- Oh, yes, all right.
767
00:41:52,511 --> 00:41:54,672
- Miss O'Shea.
- Just a minute.
768
00:41:58,950 --> 00:42:00,076
- Miss O'Shea.
- Yeah?
769
00:42:00,151 --> 00:42:02,016
We saw you pass the library arch,
770
00:42:02,087 --> 00:42:04,385
and we kind of got a little problem
on our hands.
771
00:42:04,456 --> 00:42:05,889
- Would you help us?
- Why, I'd love to.
772
00:42:05,957 --> 00:42:06,981
Oh, good.
773
00:42:07,792 --> 00:42:09,760
You're kind of spruced up today,
aren't you, Professor?
774
00:42:09,828 --> 00:42:11,455
- The spats?
- Yeah.
775
00:42:11,530 --> 00:42:15,159
I ran across them in my bottom drawer.
Why let the moths eat them?
776
00:42:15,233 --> 00:42:17,292
Attaboy. What's your problem, sweetie?
777
00:42:17,369 --> 00:42:19,234
- Well, look.
- Let me start again.
778
00:42:19,437 --> 00:42:21,462
But, Professor,
I'm completely exhausted.
779
00:42:21,540 --> 00:42:24,737
But we've got to get it right.
Now, start with the right foot.
780
00:42:24,809 --> 00:42:26,470
- The left foot.
- The right foot.
781
00:42:26,545 --> 00:42:27,603
Gentlemen, it's the left foot.
782
00:42:27,679 --> 00:42:29,738
- Which foot, please?
- The right foot.
783
00:42:29,814 --> 00:42:31,907
All right, but you're wrong.
784
00:42:32,417 --> 00:42:34,612
One, two, three, four.
785
00:42:34,686 --> 00:42:37,086
One, two, three.
786
00:42:37,155 --> 00:42:39,623
But I can't "humph" from here.
787
00:42:40,825 --> 00:42:43,988
We've been working on it
ever since luncheon.
788
00:42:44,062 --> 00:42:45,188
Holy smoke.
789
00:42:45,263 --> 00:42:48,858
- Start again with the left foot, come on.
- The left foot.
790
00:42:51,069 --> 00:42:53,503
One, two, three.
791
00:42:54,639 --> 00:42:56,334
Well, it's the right motion.
792
00:42:56,408 --> 00:42:59,775
- But it doesn't feel right.
- It doesn't look right.
793
00:43:00,312 --> 00:43:02,109
Possibly it isn't right.
794
00:43:02,180 --> 00:43:04,512
There was two "humphs." Humph, humph.
795
00:43:04,583 --> 00:43:07,017
Well, that would make it right.
Humph, humph.
796
00:43:07,852 --> 00:43:09,114
You're wrong, my dear Gurkakoff.
797
00:43:09,187 --> 00:43:11,815
Mathematics can never be wrong.
Look here, I'll show you.
798
00:43:11,890 --> 00:43:14,120
- Stay there, Professor Oddly.
- Show him.
799
00:43:15,860 --> 00:43:17,293
One, two.
800
00:43:17,362 --> 00:43:19,159
Professor Oddly, please stand up.
801
00:43:19,230 --> 00:43:20,458
I beg your pardon.
802
00:43:20,532 --> 00:43:24,093
- One, two, three. Humph, humph.
- Just one.
803
00:43:25,170 --> 00:43:27,934
- The expert is here. We need you.
- What's the trouble?
804
00:43:28,006 --> 00:43:29,837
Well, that dance you showed us last night.
805
00:43:29,908 --> 00:43:31,637
- Yeah?
- Yes, maybe we're not very bright.
806
00:43:31,710 --> 00:43:35,510
Professor Gurkakoff has been trying
to reconstruct it by compound fractions.
807
00:43:35,580 --> 00:43:37,912
- You'd better relax, lover.
- Who, me? Thank you.
808
00:43:37,983 --> 00:43:41,942
I can't find the common denominator
between the steps and the music.
809
00:43:42,020 --> 00:43:44,716
You bet you can't, you're playing
a polka, and I taught you a conga.
810
00:43:44,789 --> 00:43:47,417
How about some light in here? Come on.
811
00:43:48,226 --> 00:43:50,126
Look, kids, this is the tempo.
812
00:43:53,765 --> 00:43:54,993
Got it?
813
00:43:59,037 --> 00:44:01,369
- That's right, hit it.
- Hit what?
814
00:44:01,439 --> 00:44:03,066
That's what I told you.
815
00:44:03,475 --> 00:44:07,434
- One, two, three...
- Attaboy, Gurky! You're wonderful!
816
00:44:09,247 --> 00:44:11,943
Wing it, Professor. Hang on.
817
00:44:13,184 --> 00:44:14,651
Good afternoon.
818
00:44:16,921 --> 00:44:18,183
How do you like the new suit?
819
00:44:18,256 --> 00:44:20,383
What the well-dressed professor will wear.
820
00:44:20,458 --> 00:44:22,892
A young lady chased me all the way up
Fifth Avenue.
821
00:44:22,961 --> 00:44:24,929
Probably to tell you
to take the price tag off.
822
00:44:24,996 --> 00:44:26,964
Did you... Did you get the records?
823
00:44:27,032 --> 00:44:29,466
Well, they were all out of
Beat Me Daddy, Eight to the Bar.
824
00:44:29,534 --> 00:44:31,434
- Oh, dear, oh, dear.
- But I got Chicka Chicka Boom Boom
825
00:44:31,503 --> 00:44:35,200
- and Shoot the Sherbet to Me Herbert.
- Now watch us go.
826
00:44:37,709 --> 00:44:38,903
Thank you very much, gentlemen.
827
00:44:38,977 --> 00:44:41,036
The same time tomorrow,
all of you who can.
828
00:44:41,112 --> 00:44:43,080
- Okay, coach, so long.
- Goodbye.
829
00:44:43,148 --> 00:44:46,049
This has given me
a new interest in life, Doc.
830
00:44:46,117 --> 00:44:47,141
Me, too.
831
00:44:47,218 --> 00:44:49,584
I'm gonna use some of those
two-dollar words hollering my papers.
832
00:44:49,654 --> 00:44:53,613
Park Avenue bigamy scandal,
most illuminating, most illuminating!
833
00:44:53,692 --> 00:44:55,956
- So long, Prof.
- And thank you very much.
834
00:44:56,027 --> 00:44:57,324
That's all right.
835
00:44:57,395 --> 00:44:59,192
Excuse me for talking shop,
836
00:44:59,264 --> 00:45:02,131
but your garbage certainly
has cheered up these days.
837
00:45:02,200 --> 00:45:06,899
Flowers, candy boxes, perfume wrappings
and an empty of that sweet French liqueur.
838
00:45:06,971 --> 00:45:09,872
Why, that's not our garbage,
I'm sure.
839
00:45:09,941 --> 00:45:12,000
Maybe it wasn't, but it was in your pail.
840
00:45:15,113 --> 00:45:16,944
I'm leaving, sister.
841
00:45:20,285 --> 00:45:21,684
Miss Bragg.
842
00:45:21,753 --> 00:45:23,152
May I have a word with you,
Professor Potts?
843
00:45:23,221 --> 00:45:24,620
That music, is it coming from next door?
844
00:45:24,689 --> 00:45:27,123
From this door, and that's what
I want to talk to you about.
845
00:45:27,192 --> 00:45:28,819
Either she goes or I go.
846
00:45:28,893 --> 00:45:32,090
- You're speaking of Miss O'Shea?
- I am, Professor Potts.
847
00:45:32,163 --> 00:45:36,463
That is the kind of woman
that makes whole civilizations topple.
848
00:45:36,534 --> 00:45:40,664
It's always been my pride to scrupulously,
untiringly, efficiently...
849
00:45:40,739 --> 00:45:43,105
Now, now, Miss Bragg,
you've split that infinitive three times.
850
00:45:43,174 --> 00:45:45,472
I repeat, either she goes or I go.
851
00:45:45,543 --> 00:45:48,376
I don't like ultimata, Miss Bragg,
but I shall look into the matter.
852
00:45:48,446 --> 00:45:51,643
Don't look into the matter,
look into the library.
853
00:46:07,932 --> 00:46:10,264
Hiya, Pottsy, come on, hook on!
854
00:46:10,335 --> 00:46:11,962
I feel so abandoned.
855
00:46:21,246 --> 00:46:22,907
Hey, what's the big idea?
856
00:46:22,981 --> 00:46:26,348
As soon as you gentlemen get your breath,
we had better have a conference.
857
00:46:26,417 --> 00:46:27,907
Will you please leave the room,
Miss O'Shea?
858
00:46:27,986 --> 00:46:31,945
- But we've only just started.
- If you please, Miss O'Shea.
859
00:46:32,023 --> 00:46:33,957
Loose-tooth again.
860
00:46:34,025 --> 00:46:35,890
Now, if you gentlemen will be kind enough
861
00:46:37,562 --> 00:46:39,427
to get together all that you've written
in the last three days...
862
00:46:47,639 --> 00:46:48,765
Well, it's about time.
863
00:46:48,840 --> 00:46:50,740
I thought you two had amnesia
and forgot where you parked me.
864
00:46:50,809 --> 00:46:51,833
Hold the phone, Sugie.
865
00:46:51,910 --> 00:46:54,208
Dropping me on the doorstep
like a throwaway for a credit dentist.
866
00:46:54,279 --> 00:46:56,304
- You said it was for one night.
- Sugie, for snap's sake.
867
00:46:56,381 --> 00:46:58,611
You're as hot as a pistol.
The DA's got 100 men on the job.
868
00:46:58,683 --> 00:47:01,311
Why, they're squeezing this town
through a sieve, borough by borough.
869
00:47:01,386 --> 00:47:02,614
You tell her, Pastrami.
870
00:47:02,687 --> 00:47:05,349
They're tailing us, Sugie. Took us
three hours to get here from 48th Street.
871
00:47:05,423 --> 00:47:07,220
Detoured through Jamaica, Long Island
to shake them off.
872
00:47:07,292 --> 00:47:08,350
Okay, you wait here.
873
00:47:08,426 --> 00:47:09,825
I'll get my things together
in two seconds flat.
874
00:47:09,894 --> 00:47:11,293
Hey, wait a minute, Sugie.
875
00:47:11,362 --> 00:47:15,025
- We got a surprise for you.
- You ain't leaving, not right yet.
876
00:47:15,099 --> 00:47:16,361
I'm not? Joe's out, isn't he?
877
00:47:16,434 --> 00:47:19,403
Yeah, but for how long? They're laying
for you so they can get him back.
878
00:47:19,470 --> 00:47:20,494
That's the surprise.
879
00:47:20,572 --> 00:47:23,302
I'm supposed to stay in this old mans'
home till the moths eat holes in me?
880
00:47:23,374 --> 00:47:25,865
Say, when I say a surprise,
I mean a surprise.
881
00:47:25,944 --> 00:47:27,639
Go on, flash it to her.
882
00:47:27,712 --> 00:47:30,078
Put on your sunglasses, Sugie.
883
00:47:30,715 --> 00:47:33,582
- Oh, boy.
- Seven grand boiled into that one, Sugie.
884
00:47:34,385 --> 00:47:36,751
Joe doesn't have to bribe me
just because I do him a little favor.
885
00:47:36,821 --> 00:47:38,379
It's not a bribe, don't take it like that.
886
00:47:38,456 --> 00:47:39,616
Let him try and get it back though.
887
00:47:39,691 --> 00:47:40,851
Say, it's not your size, is it?
888
00:47:40,925 --> 00:47:42,790
It'll do, if I have to whittle down my finger.
889
00:47:42,861 --> 00:47:45,091
Third finger, left hand, Sugie.
890
00:47:45,163 --> 00:47:47,256
- Who do you think you're kidding?
- The future Mrs. Joe Lilac.
891
00:47:47,332 --> 00:47:49,129
- Come again?
- Wedding bells, sweetheart.
892
00:47:49,200 --> 00:47:50,792
Joe and the lawyer have got it
all figured out.
893
00:47:50,869 --> 00:47:52,666
Yeah, a wife can't testify
against husband, see.
894
00:47:52,737 --> 00:47:54,068
Don't put it like that, you dope.
895
00:47:54,138 --> 00:47:58,336
Say, he's been thataway about you
ever since he first picked you out.
896
00:47:58,409 --> 00:48:00,843
Yeah, but it took the DA
to make him pop the question.
897
00:48:00,912 --> 00:48:02,038
He sent you a love message.
898
00:48:02,113 --> 00:48:05,139
He says to tell you he gets more bang
out of you than any dame he ever knew.
899
00:48:05,216 --> 00:48:08,413
And he's the top, Sugie,
do you realize that? He's the top.
900
00:48:08,519 --> 00:48:09,986
Mrs. Joe Lilac.
901
00:48:10,054 --> 00:48:12,716
Third Avenue girl
in the major league at last.
902
00:48:12,790 --> 00:48:15,088
Wait till they find out,
those other dolls in the show.
903
00:48:15,159 --> 00:48:17,252
Watch me break their crockery with this.
904
00:48:17,328 --> 00:48:18,920
Here, here,
the wedding's got to be a fast one, though.
905
00:48:18,997 --> 00:48:20,259
Over in New Jersey someplace.
906
00:48:20,331 --> 00:48:22,765
Now, this is the application for the license,
and you sign right here.
907
00:48:22,834 --> 00:48:24,495
- Will I? You got a pen?
- Yeah.
908
00:48:24,569 --> 00:48:26,799
- Unscrew it for Mrs. Lilac.
- Right here, right here.
909
00:48:26,871 --> 00:48:27,963
You know, I can't make up my mind.
910
00:48:28,039 --> 00:48:32,373
Will I continue my night club career
or bust in on the Helen Hayes racket?
911
00:48:32,443 --> 00:48:34,206
Say, this ought to be signed
before a notary public.
912
00:48:34,279 --> 00:48:36,975
I'm a notary public,
permission expires 1943.
913
00:48:37,048 --> 00:48:38,777
Were those pajamas a good investment.
914
00:48:38,850 --> 00:48:40,875
You'll get the final dope
by tomorrow morning.
915
00:48:40,952 --> 00:48:42,044
Joe will phone around 10:00.
916
00:48:42,120 --> 00:48:44,554
Now, meantime lie low
and stick close to the Ameche.
917
00:48:44,622 --> 00:48:46,920
- Okay, the what?
- The telephone.
918
00:48:51,396 --> 00:48:54,229
- Miss Sugarpuss.
- You'd better duck.
919
00:48:54,299 --> 00:48:56,392
- Okay, 10:00, I'll be waiting.
- Okay, okay.
920
00:48:56,467 --> 00:48:58,435
- Miss Sugarpuss.
- Here I am.
921
00:48:58,503 --> 00:49:00,403
Just getting a little air.
922
00:49:00,471 --> 00:49:03,031
- Miss O'Shea.
- What's buzzing, cousin?
923
00:49:03,107 --> 00:49:05,507
Professor Potts would...
924
00:49:05,576 --> 00:49:08,443
He wishes to speak to you.
925
00:49:08,813 --> 00:49:10,075
- Yes.
- Yes.
926
00:49:10,148 --> 00:49:12,378
Don't worry, kids, cheer up.
927
00:49:13,918 --> 00:49:16,148
- Shut the door, please.
- Sure.
928
00:49:20,224 --> 00:49:23,682
- Take this chair, please, Miss O'Shea.
- This particular one?
929
00:49:23,761 --> 00:49:24,887
Okay.
930
00:49:28,032 --> 00:49:30,000
Open your mouth, please.
931
00:49:30,068 --> 00:49:32,536
Open your mouth. Wider.
932
00:49:33,671 --> 00:49:34,695
Thank you.
933
00:49:34,772 --> 00:49:36,330
- Can I close it now?
- Please do.
934
00:49:36,407 --> 00:49:37,704
- Okay.
- Miss O'Shea.
935
00:49:37,775 --> 00:49:38,799
Yeah?
936
00:49:38,876 --> 00:49:42,243
Circumstances, under, over which
neither of us has the least control,
937
00:49:42,313 --> 00:49:45,373
force me to a step
I am most reluctant to take.
938
00:49:46,684 --> 00:49:49,676
The sky is perfectly clear.
The thermometer stands at 76.
939
00:49:49,754 --> 00:49:52,848
Your throat seems quite normal.
I must ask you to leave.
940
00:49:52,924 --> 00:49:54,983
Leave here? Why?
941
00:49:55,059 --> 00:49:57,892
Miss O'Shea,
I want you to look at our project,
942
00:49:57,962 --> 00:50:01,125
I mean the encyclopedia, as a voyage,
943
00:50:01,199 --> 00:50:03,667
a long, hard, tedious one.
944
00:50:03,735 --> 00:50:05,794
A voyage from "A" to "Z."
945
00:50:05,870 --> 00:50:07,735
Now, when the Foundation
launched our vessel,
946
00:50:07,805 --> 00:50:12,265
it very wisely followed an old rule
of the sea, no women aboard.
947
00:50:12,343 --> 00:50:15,210
It chose a crew of single men
with nothing to distract them
948
00:50:15,279 --> 00:50:16,871
from the course they were to sail.
949
00:50:16,948 --> 00:50:20,145
Say, junior, couldn't stop
walking around a little, could you?
950
00:50:20,218 --> 00:50:23,346
For four days, we have been drifting,
Miss O'Shea.
951
00:50:23,421 --> 00:50:25,753
The needle of the compass
no longer points to the magnetic pole.
952
00:50:25,823 --> 00:50:28,451
It points, if I may say so, to your ankles.
953
00:50:28,526 --> 00:50:30,824
Come now, Admiral,
a bunch of grown men,
954
00:50:30,895 --> 00:50:32,886
they've seen a pair of ankles before.
955
00:50:32,964 --> 00:50:34,454
Not for nine years.
956
00:50:34,532 --> 00:50:38,525
Except for the singularly uninspiring
underpinnings of Miss Bragg.
957
00:50:38,603 --> 00:50:40,002
Now, my colleagues...
958
00:50:40,071 --> 00:50:42,301
If you think I'm bothering them,
I'll sit on my legs.
959
00:50:42,373 --> 00:50:44,773
- And I'll do it in my room or in the kitchen.
- Too late.
960
00:50:44,842 --> 00:50:48,073
- You must leave, Miss O'Shea.
- Well, I can't leave now.
961
00:50:48,146 --> 00:50:50,637
How about that slang?
It's not finished yet.
962
00:50:50,715 --> 00:50:52,615
There's a lot of words
we haven't caught up with.
963
00:50:52,683 --> 00:50:55,516
For instance, do you know what this
means, "I'll get you on the Ameche"?
964
00:50:55,586 --> 00:50:56,814
- No.
- Of course, you don't.
965
00:50:56,888 --> 00:50:58,253
An Ameche is the telephone.
966
00:50:58,322 --> 00:51:00,153
- On account of he invented it.
- Oh, no, he didn't.
967
00:51:00,224 --> 00:51:04,854
- You know, in the movies.
- I see what you mean. Very interesting.
968
00:51:04,996 --> 00:51:08,659
Make no mistake, I shall regret
the absence of your keen mind.
969
00:51:08,733 --> 00:51:12,794
Unfortunately, it is inseparable
from an extremely disturbing body.
970
00:51:14,172 --> 00:51:16,470
All right. I'll go, only don't shove.
971
00:51:16,541 --> 00:51:19,237
- I'll leave sometime tomorrow.
- Not tomorrow. Right away.
972
00:51:19,310 --> 00:51:21,437
- But I tell you I've got a...
- I insist, Miss O'Shea.
973
00:51:21,512 --> 00:51:22,945
Oh, Crabapple Annie.
974
00:51:23,014 --> 00:51:24,675
- Listen, Pottsy...
- Crabapple Annie?
975
00:51:24,749 --> 00:51:26,910
Why, that implies
that I'm puritanical and narrow-minded.
976
00:51:26,984 --> 00:51:28,008
Yeah.
977
00:51:28,086 --> 00:51:30,782
I am a perfectly normal man
with perfectly normal instincts.
978
00:51:30,855 --> 00:51:33,323
- But an awful high boiling point.
- Not even that.
979
00:51:33,391 --> 00:51:36,189
I, too, have been acutely aware
of your presence.
980
00:51:36,260 --> 00:51:38,057
- You have?
- Twice, to be exact.
981
00:51:38,129 --> 00:51:39,460
Once when you leaned over my shoulder
982
00:51:39,530 --> 00:51:41,464
to correct my spelling of
the word "boogie-woogie,"
983
00:51:41,532 --> 00:51:43,261
I could feel your breath on my ear.
984
00:51:43,334 --> 00:51:45,768
And yesterday afternoon when you
happened to stand against the window
985
00:51:45,837 --> 00:51:48,135
with the sunlight in your hair.
986
00:51:49,874 --> 00:51:53,037
- What'd you do about it?
- I left the room,
987
00:51:53,111 --> 00:51:54,703
dipped my handkerchief in cold water
988
00:51:54,779 --> 00:51:56,679
and applied it to the back of
my neck right there,
989
00:51:56,747 --> 00:51:59,807
- where the nerve center is.
- That's cute.
990
00:51:59,884 --> 00:52:02,944
You see, that's the basic difference
between me and the other professors.
991
00:52:03,020 --> 00:52:05,750
We are all beguiled,
but I am relatively young.
992
00:52:05,823 --> 00:52:07,120
I can suppress temptation.
993
00:52:07,191 --> 00:52:10,752
I generate enough energy
to take precautionary measures.
994
00:52:11,963 --> 00:52:15,421
A little sun on my hair
and you had to water your neck.
995
00:52:17,502 --> 00:52:19,936
Perhaps I shouldn't have mentioned it,
Miss O'Shea,
996
00:52:20,004 --> 00:52:21,869
but I'm merely trying to point out the fact
997
00:52:21,939 --> 00:52:24,772
that the success of our enterprise
is at stake.
998
00:52:24,842 --> 00:52:26,901
I want you to...
999
00:52:30,748 --> 00:52:32,272
Cooperate.
1000
00:52:32,350 --> 00:52:34,113
I want you to leave.
1001
00:52:35,219 --> 00:52:37,016
All right, I'll go.
1002
00:52:37,922 --> 00:52:41,153
But if I'm going to go anyway,
I guess I might as well spill it.
1003
00:52:41,225 --> 00:52:43,489
Spill it? Spill what?
1004
00:52:43,561 --> 00:52:45,324
Why do you suppose
I came here in the first place?
1005
00:52:45,396 --> 00:52:46,454
To help with the research.
1006
00:52:46,531 --> 00:52:48,522
- I did not. I came on account of you.
- Me?
1007
00:52:48,599 --> 00:52:50,533
And not on account of
you needed some slang.
1008
00:52:50,601 --> 00:52:52,296
On account of
because I wanted to see you again.
1009
00:52:52,370 --> 00:52:54,964
Miss O'Shea, the construction
"on account of because"
1010
00:52:55,039 --> 00:52:56,734
outrages every grammatical law.
1011
00:52:56,807 --> 00:52:59,605
So what? I came on account of
because I couldn't stop thinking about you
1012
00:52:59,677 --> 00:53:01,440
after you left my dressing room.
1013
00:53:01,512 --> 00:53:06,074
On account of because I thought
you were big and cute and pretty.
1014
00:53:06,150 --> 00:53:07,481
- Pretty?
- Yeah, I mean you.
1015
00:53:07,552 --> 00:53:10,919
Maybe I'm just crazy, but to me,
you're a regular yum-yum type.
1016
00:53:10,988 --> 00:53:12,979
- Yum-yum?
- Yeah, don't you know what that means?
1017
00:53:13,057 --> 00:53:14,115
No, we never got to that.
1018
00:53:14,192 --> 00:53:15,887
Well, we've got to it now,
and I'm glad it's out.
1019
00:53:15,960 --> 00:53:17,689
I don't give a whoop
whether the others went for me.
1020
00:53:17,762 --> 00:53:19,627
You're the one I'm wacky about,
just plain wacky.
1021
00:53:19,697 --> 00:53:21,460
- Can you understand that?
- Please, Miss O'Shea.
1022
00:53:21,532 --> 00:53:23,693
Oh, please, nothing.
Maybe you can generate or whatever it is
1023
00:53:23,768 --> 00:53:26,032
for all that suppress business, but...
1024
00:53:26,103 --> 00:53:28,401
I can't. No, you're too tall.
1025
00:53:31,142 --> 00:53:32,404
- What are you doing?
- You'll find out.
1026
00:53:32,476 --> 00:53:34,068
Those are Professor Gurkakoff's
reference books.
1027
00:53:34,145 --> 00:53:36,204
- Now, isn't that just too bad!
- And they're very...
1028
00:53:36,280 --> 00:53:37,872
- That's perfect.
- What are you going to do?
1029
00:53:37,949 --> 00:53:40,713
Come here,
I'm going to show you what yum-yum is.
1030
00:53:40,785 --> 00:53:42,150
Here's yum.
1031
00:53:43,688 --> 00:53:45,519
Here's the other yum.
1032
00:53:47,525 --> 00:53:49,288
And here's yum-yum.
1033
00:53:53,164 --> 00:53:54,495
Excuse me.
1034
00:53:55,233 --> 00:53:56,257
Hey, where are you going?
1035
00:54:07,745 --> 00:54:10,805
Did you see?
He practically stepped on my hand.
1036
00:54:10,881 --> 00:54:12,712
- Three steps at a time.
- Shot out of a gun.
1037
00:54:12,783 --> 00:54:14,444
- But where is he going?
- Why?
1038
00:54:14,518 --> 00:54:18,215
To get a razor strop, I hope,
and I hope he knows where to apply it.
1039
00:54:23,160 --> 00:54:27,062
- Well, Professor Potts?
- Yes, Miss Bragg.
1040
00:54:27,131 --> 00:54:30,430
Will one of you call a taxi
from the corner for Miss O'Shea?
1041
00:54:31,102 --> 00:54:33,093
- Right away.
- Thank you.
1042
00:54:39,010 --> 00:54:41,376
- Fine business.
- I beg your pardon?
1043
00:54:41,445 --> 00:54:43,072
What's the idea of
running out on me like that?
1044
00:54:43,147 --> 00:54:45,240
Nothing, nothing.
1045
00:54:45,816 --> 00:54:48,876
The last few minutes
only confirmed my former decision.
1046
00:54:48,953 --> 00:54:50,944
Your further presence here would be fatal.
1047
00:54:51,022 --> 00:54:54,583
You must get me out of your mind
just as I must get you out of this house.
1048
00:54:54,659 --> 00:54:58,026
- Your hair's wet.
- Well, never mind, please.
1049
00:54:58,095 --> 00:55:00,586
- Well, it is wet.
- Well, what of it?
1050
00:55:00,665 --> 00:55:01,893
Nothing, I just happened to mention it.
1051
00:55:01,966 --> 00:55:04,560
- Well, forget it, please.
- Okay, okay.
1052
00:55:05,269 --> 00:55:08,295
Now to get back to the subject
under discussion.
1053
00:55:08,372 --> 00:55:11,739
It would be idle of me to deny that I, too,
feel the affinity
1054
00:55:11,809 --> 00:55:15,176
that you mentioned a few minutes ago,
very strongly.
1055
00:55:15,246 --> 00:55:17,111
After three years,
when my work is finished,
1056
00:55:17,181 --> 00:55:19,979
perhaps we can take up where we left off.
1057
00:55:20,051 --> 00:55:24,988
In the meantime, I hope we can keep up
some sort of correspondence.
1058
00:55:26,223 --> 00:55:30,319
- Would you, Miss Sugarpuss?
- Oh, Pottsy.
1059
00:55:31,629 --> 00:55:34,894
I know that's the way I feel, too,
but it has to be.
1060
00:55:36,434 --> 00:55:40,768
Sugarpuss, before you go, would you...
1061
00:55:47,511 --> 00:55:48,978
Would you
1062
00:55:50,514 --> 00:55:52,414
yum me just once more?
1063
00:55:59,790 --> 00:56:02,486
- It seems so unnecessary.
- Yes.
1064
00:56:02,560 --> 00:56:04,187
- Yes.
- The taxi's here.
1065
00:56:04,295 --> 00:56:05,785
I'll tell him.
1066
00:56:11,168 --> 00:56:14,660
Professor Potts,
the taxi for that young woman is here.
1067
00:56:16,774 --> 00:56:18,071
The taxi.
1068
00:56:19,611 --> 00:56:21,841
- Yes, what is it?
- The taxi's here.
1069
00:56:21,913 --> 00:56:23,278
Taxi? What taxi?
1070
00:56:24,149 --> 00:56:26,049
Miss O'Shea's or mine.
1071
00:56:27,853 --> 00:56:30,219
It's all yours, Crabapple Annie.
1072
00:56:52,911 --> 00:56:55,675
What is the delay, young man?
Delivery was promised for 10:00.
1073
00:56:55,747 --> 00:56:57,112
Sign here.
1074
00:56:57,649 --> 00:57:00,516
- I trust that it's engraved correctly.
- I guess so.
1075
00:57:00,585 --> 00:57:02,849
- $39.85, wasn't it?
- Yeah.
1076
00:57:02,921 --> 00:57:05,685
Here's $40. Keep the change.
1077
00:57:10,729 --> 00:57:13,129
- You're sure the setting is solid gold?
- Why, of course.
1078
00:57:13,198 --> 00:57:15,462
There was one $5 cheaper,
but not nearly so handsome.
1079
00:57:15,534 --> 00:57:17,024
- Let's see it, Potts.
- Yes, please.
1080
00:57:17,102 --> 00:57:19,229
No, no, it's wrapped so neatly, I hate to.
1081
00:57:19,304 --> 00:57:21,670
- I'll take it, Miss Bragg.
- Room service.
1082
00:57:21,740 --> 00:57:25,676
- Now we've got room service.
- I thought she might like this.
1083
00:57:25,744 --> 00:57:27,678
- Thank you.
- It's nothing, really.
1084
00:57:27,746 --> 00:57:29,145
Be careful.
1085
00:57:31,983 --> 00:57:34,781
If I were the cream
for that woman's coffee, I'd curdle.
1086
00:57:34,853 --> 00:57:37,754
I thought you meant to leave us
in protest, Miss Bragg.
1087
00:57:37,823 --> 00:57:38,949
- Yes.
- Yes.
1088
00:57:39,024 --> 00:57:42,983
A nurse does not quit her post
when an epidemic reaches a crisis.
1089
00:57:53,503 --> 00:57:54,765
Come in.
1090
00:57:58,909 --> 00:58:02,276
- Morning, Pottsy.
- Good morning. I brought your breakfast.
1091
00:58:02,345 --> 00:58:06,145
Good, I'll have it right here
in the snooze stand, thank you.
1092
00:58:06,950 --> 00:58:09,441
- How do you take it?
- Just jav, no cow.
1093
00:58:09,519 --> 00:58:11,214
- Just what?
- Black.
1094
00:58:12,055 --> 00:58:13,750
- Sugar?
- Straight.
1095
00:58:14,958 --> 00:58:16,721
- Toast?
- No, thanks.
1096
00:58:17,661 --> 00:58:20,186
- You sure you don't want some toast?
- Uh-uh.
1097
00:58:20,263 --> 00:58:22,788
Well, here's some jam to go with it.
It's blackberry.
1098
00:58:22,866 --> 00:58:25,130
- Never use it.
- Not just one bite?
1099
00:58:25,202 --> 00:58:26,328
Mmm-mmm.
1100
00:58:27,070 --> 00:58:28,662
Sit down and take a load off your feet.
1101
00:58:28,738 --> 00:58:31,138
Say, I found out what's wrong with
"on account of because."
1102
00:58:31,208 --> 00:58:32,232
It's saying the same thing twice,
1103
00:58:32,309 --> 00:58:34,573
you know, like calling somebody
a rich millionaire.
1104
00:58:34,644 --> 00:58:38,671
You call it a pleo...
No, wait a minute, a plea...
1105
00:58:38,748 --> 00:58:41,308
- A pleonasm?
- Yes, that how you pronounce it? That's it.
1106
00:58:41,384 --> 00:58:43,318
- Who told you that?
- This room's full of books about grammar.
1107
00:58:43,386 --> 00:58:45,047
I read for a couple of hours.
1108
00:58:45,121 --> 00:58:46,179
I couldn't sleep, either.
1109
00:58:46,256 --> 00:58:49,225
I walked in the park till the sun
came up over the East Sixties.
1110
00:58:49,292 --> 00:58:51,089
It took me all that time
to gather my thoughts,
1111
00:58:51,161 --> 00:58:54,619
to analyze my impulses
and clarify our relationship.
1112
00:58:54,698 --> 00:58:55,824
Have we got one of those?
1113
00:58:55,899 --> 00:58:58,663
It's a very important moment,
a new chapter.
1114
00:58:58,735 --> 00:59:00,726
In fact, for me, it's the first chapter.
1115
00:59:00,804 --> 00:59:05,241
For what has my life been up till now?
A preface. An empty foreword.
1116
00:59:05,308 --> 00:59:07,435
You couldn't talk a little plainer,
could you?
1117
00:59:07,510 --> 00:59:09,569
Not if you won't have a piece of toast.
1118
00:59:09,646 --> 00:59:12,581
At least just... At least look under the lid.
1119
00:59:16,653 --> 00:59:19,884
- You went and bought me a present.
- I hope it fits.
1120
00:59:19,956 --> 00:59:23,392
Gurkakoff calculated the circumference
of your finger.
1121
00:59:32,969 --> 00:59:35,870
I woke up the jeweler at 7:00 this morning.
1122
00:59:37,407 --> 00:59:41,468
- It's a lovely ring, Pottsy, really it is.
- I hoped you'd like it.
1123
00:59:42,679 --> 00:59:45,978
It's our... It's our engagement ring.
1124
00:59:47,083 --> 00:59:51,611
- Pottsy, do you mean you...
- Yes, I did, I...
1125
00:59:52,522 --> 00:59:54,422
You mean you really...
1126
00:59:58,261 --> 00:59:59,387
Well?
1127
01:00:01,431 --> 01:00:04,491
- What am I supposed to say?
- Just say yes.
1128
01:00:05,368 --> 01:00:09,737
After you've declared your feelings,
it's the only logical step to take.
1129
01:00:10,907 --> 01:00:15,071
Don't you think you'd better take
another turn around the park, Pottsy?
1130
01:00:15,512 --> 01:00:17,275
I'm just as surprised as you.
1131
01:00:17,347 --> 01:00:20,111
Marriage? I thought
I was married to my books.
1132
01:00:20,183 --> 01:00:22,242
The only thing
I thought I could care for deeply
1133
01:00:22,319 --> 01:00:24,787
was a correctly constructed sentence.
1134
01:00:24,854 --> 01:00:30,520
The subject, predicate, adverbial clause,
each in its proper place, and then you...
1135
01:00:30,593 --> 01:00:33,994
You see, I've had rather a curious life.
1136
01:00:34,064 --> 01:00:36,658
I graduated from Princeton when I was 13.
1137
01:00:36,733 --> 01:00:40,260
I recited Tyger, Tyger Burning Bright
when I was a year old.
1138
01:00:40,337 --> 01:00:43,135
Before I was two, I could read fluently.
1139
01:00:44,040 --> 01:00:47,066
People like that just, well...
1140
01:00:48,244 --> 01:00:51,736
You see, dust just piles up on their hearts.
1141
01:00:51,815 --> 01:00:54,215
And it took you to blow it away.
1142
01:00:55,752 --> 01:00:57,379
Yeah, but I...
1143
01:00:58,021 --> 01:01:01,115
I didn't mean
to blow it smack into your eyes.
1144
01:01:01,191 --> 01:01:05,059
Well, that's what happened, look.
Look inside the ring.
1145
01:01:07,464 --> 01:01:09,489
Oh, yeah, there's writing.
1146
01:01:10,333 --> 01:01:13,791
- "Richard III." Who's Richard III?
- Richard III.
1147
01:01:13,870 --> 01:01:17,101
Act 1, Scene 2, line 204.
1148
01:01:17,941 --> 01:01:21,138
- There wasn't room for all the words.
- What words?
1149
01:01:21,211 --> 01:01:24,510
Well, they go like this, quote,
1150
01:01:24,581 --> 01:01:27,709
"Look, how this ring
encompasseth thy finger.
1151
01:01:27,784 --> 01:01:31,276
"Even so thy breast
encloseth my poor heart.
1152
01:01:31,354 --> 01:01:34,517
"Wear both of them,
for both of them are thine."
1153
01:01:37,093 --> 01:01:38,856
Unquote, I suppose.
1154
01:01:40,697 --> 01:01:43,825
I hope you don't think it's too corny.
1155
01:01:47,370 --> 01:01:50,464
- Pottsy, I...
- Come in.
1156
01:01:52,542 --> 01:01:54,669
- There is a telephone call for you.
- For me?
1157
01:01:54,744 --> 01:01:58,202
We didn't want to interrupt, but the man
on the wire said it was from your daddy.
1158
01:01:58,281 --> 01:02:00,408
- Daddy?
- That's what he said.
1159
01:02:00,517 --> 01:02:01,506
Oh.
1160
01:02:02,152 --> 01:02:05,553
- Oh, yes, Daddy!
- It's long distance.
1161
01:02:05,622 --> 01:02:07,317
Yeah, I'll get it.
1162
01:02:08,224 --> 01:02:11,022
- How did it go, Potts?
- She seemed quite overwhelmed.
1163
01:02:11,094 --> 01:02:12,288
That was to be expected.
1164
01:02:12,362 --> 01:02:15,388
You see, excuse me,
you see, the customary procedure
1165
01:02:15,465 --> 01:02:17,933
is to approach
the parents of the young lady first.
1166
01:02:18,001 --> 01:02:20,196
- Yes.
- Yes, I realize that.
1167
01:02:22,639 --> 01:02:25,472
- Hello?
- Hello, hello, it's Asthma, Sugie.
1168
01:02:25,542 --> 01:02:26,668
The boss wants to talk to you,
1169
01:02:26,743 --> 01:02:29,303
only we're relaying the call
so it won't be traced, dig me?
1170
01:02:29,379 --> 01:02:31,210
Here she is, boss. Ready?
1171
01:02:31,281 --> 01:02:33,977
Okay, Sugie, don't use no names, though.
1172
01:02:42,425 --> 01:02:45,292
Oh, boy, did you call at the right minute.
Where are you?
1173
01:02:45,361 --> 01:02:48,922
Some whistle snort in New Jersey.
Rancocas, it's called.
1174
01:02:49,466 --> 01:02:52,731
Well, how you been, Sugie? I hear
you're hiding out with the seven dwarfs.
1175
01:02:52,802 --> 01:02:55,930
Eight. And it's kind of indicated
I'd better get out of here quick.
1176
01:02:56,005 --> 01:03:00,066
Oh, no, nothing like that, it's just that one
of the professors got off the beam a little.
1177
01:03:00,143 --> 01:03:02,668
Yeah, a slight case of Andy Hardy.
1178
01:03:02,745 --> 01:03:07,148
Why don't you just take his umbrella
and whack him over the knuckles?
1179
01:03:07,217 --> 01:03:10,380
Well, everything's all set, babe.
The license comes through this afternoon.
1180
01:03:10,453 --> 01:03:13,286
I got a justice of the peace all lined up.
1181
01:03:13,756 --> 01:03:16,953
Yeah, that's what we're trying
to figure out, how to get you here.
1182
01:03:17,026 --> 01:03:20,154
No, I don't want you to take a train.
They'd spot you like a lead dime.
1183
01:03:20,230 --> 01:03:23,199
They'll be watching everything,
Holland Tunnel, Washington Bridge.
1184
01:03:23,266 --> 01:03:25,097
I don't even trust the highways.
1185
01:03:25,168 --> 01:03:27,363
I don't care
if I have to hook a ride on a hearse.
1186
01:03:27,437 --> 01:03:29,837
I want to get out of here.
I don't like it. I want to blow.
1187
01:03:32,775 --> 01:03:35,642
Well, what other news is there, Daddy?
1188
01:03:35,712 --> 01:03:39,204
Everything fine at home? Is Mom all right?
1189
01:03:43,086 --> 01:03:47,750
For Easter? Well, I don't know, Daddy.
1190
01:03:48,224 --> 01:03:51,489
Just a minute.
I won't be long, just wait in the library.
1191
01:03:51,561 --> 01:03:54,428
Do you mind if I have a few words
with your father?
1192
01:03:55,565 --> 01:03:56,725
Sure.
1193
01:03:58,801 --> 01:04:02,601
Daddy, this is the professor
I was telling you about.
1194
01:04:06,609 --> 01:04:10,204
Mr. O'Shea? My name is Bertram Potts.
1195
01:04:11,080 --> 01:04:15,915
I judge your daughter has already
told you of my aspirations in her regard.
1196
01:04:17,020 --> 01:04:18,544
Hey, are you crazy?
1197
01:04:19,355 --> 01:04:22,347
You're quite right, Mr. O'Shea.
1198
01:04:22,425 --> 01:04:24,154
It's inexcusable for one
to introduce oneself
1199
01:04:24,227 --> 01:04:27,458
to one's future father-in-law
over the telephone.
1200
01:04:28,331 --> 01:04:30,458
But before even considering
1201
01:04:30,533 --> 01:04:32,433
entrusting your daughter's
future happiness to my care,
1202
01:04:32,502 --> 01:04:35,232
I'm sure you want to know all about me.
1203
01:04:37,106 --> 01:04:38,698
Well, as character references,
1204
01:04:38,775 --> 01:04:41,642
you might get in touch with the head
of the Rockefeller Foundation,
1205
01:04:41,711 --> 01:04:44,544
and the President of Princeton,
my own university.
1206
01:04:46,516 --> 01:04:49,007
Well, except for occasional trouble
with my left sinus,
1207
01:04:49,085 --> 01:04:51,679
I am in excellent physical condition.
1208
01:04:52,355 --> 01:04:55,654
- How's your digestion, son?
- Good.
1209
01:04:56,492 --> 01:04:59,461
I draw a salary of $3,200 per year.
1210
01:05:00,463 --> 01:05:03,830
In the last election,
I voted the straight Republican ticket.
1211
01:05:04,000 --> 01:05:06,093
That's fine, that's fine.
1212
01:05:07,704 --> 01:05:10,172
I just had a brain flash, McNeary.
1213
01:05:11,040 --> 01:05:14,237
What did you say your first name is, son?
Bertram.
1214
01:05:15,144 --> 01:05:17,442
Well, Bertram,
I don't know if Sugarpuss told you,
1215
01:05:17,513 --> 01:05:19,777
but she's our only child.
1216
01:05:19,849 --> 01:05:23,080
We kind of never figured
on having a professor in the family,
1217
01:05:23,152 --> 01:05:26,053
but if that's what she wants,
then that's fine with us.
1218
01:05:26,122 --> 01:05:29,250
Well, I shall do everything I can,
Mr. O'Shea, to make her happy.
1219
01:05:29,325 --> 01:05:31,623
Just one thing more, Bertram.
1220
01:05:31,694 --> 01:05:35,994
Mom is kind of an invalid,
doesn't do any traveling.
1221
01:05:36,065 --> 01:05:38,863
But it would just break her heart
not to see Sugarpuss married.
1222
01:05:38,935 --> 01:05:41,529
- You understand that?
- Of course, sir.
1223
01:05:41,604 --> 01:05:44,801
My mother's dead,
but I know it would have...
1224
01:05:45,675 --> 01:05:48,508
It would have made her happy
to be present.
1225
01:05:48,978 --> 01:05:52,004
So, suppose you just bring the kid
right down here.
1226
01:05:52,081 --> 01:05:56,177
We want to see you and
let's have the ceremony in our hometown.
1227
01:05:56,853 --> 01:05:58,946
Why, of course, Mr. O'Shea.
1228
01:05:59,722 --> 01:06:02,213
May I call you Father, Mr. O'Shea?
1229
01:06:03,226 --> 01:06:05,126
Thank you, Father.
1230
01:06:06,362 --> 01:06:10,389
It was better than I hoped for.
Your father wants to talk to you.
1231
01:06:14,404 --> 01:06:16,872
Well, Sugie,
this solves your transportation.
1232
01:06:16,939 --> 01:06:18,702
That Jack was made-to-order.
1233
01:06:18,775 --> 01:06:22,677
Who's gonna stop the Rockefeller
Foundation and Princeton University?
1234
01:06:22,745 --> 01:06:25,646
And suppose you get a couple of the other
old beavers to come along in the car.
1235
01:06:25,715 --> 01:06:28,115
Maybe there's some other way.
1236
01:06:28,184 --> 01:06:30,414
I don't want to take them
for that kind of a ride.
1237
01:06:30,486 --> 01:06:32,886
That's quite all right.
I'll take a couple of days off.
1238
01:06:32,955 --> 01:06:35,583
- Yes, we all will.
- That's a good idea.
1239
01:06:35,992 --> 01:06:39,257
Now cut out the menkenkes, Sugie.
This gets you to Rancocas.
1240
01:06:39,328 --> 01:06:41,728
Once you're here, we'll give the professor
the boot, easy like,
1241
01:06:41,798 --> 01:06:43,857
where it won't blind him.
1242
01:06:43,933 --> 01:06:46,868
I don't want any discussions.
Just one thing.
1243
01:06:47,470 --> 01:06:51,600
Watch out for the Washington Bridge.
That'll be swarming with cops.
1244
01:06:52,642 --> 01:06:55,008
Hello? Hello?
1245
01:06:58,081 --> 01:07:01,812
- What's the matter, my dear?
- He's always in such a rush.
1246
01:07:01,884 --> 01:07:04,546
Which is my great good fortune,
the sooner the better.
1247
01:07:04,620 --> 01:07:07,418
Gentlemen, I now have the honor
to announce our betrothal.
1248
01:07:07,490 --> 01:07:08,821
Congratulations.
1249
01:07:08,891 --> 01:07:12,657
Very sensibly condensed,
as in the Reader's Digest.
1250
01:07:14,831 --> 01:07:17,959
- Please don't cry, I'm very happy.
- Can't help it.
1251
01:07:18,034 --> 01:07:21,435
Look, why don't you go upstairs and
pack my fianc�e's things for her? Please.
1252
01:07:21,504 --> 01:07:24,405
- I want to be an usher.
- We'll all be ushers.
1253
01:07:25,074 --> 01:07:27,304
One kisses the bride. May I?
1254
01:07:27,376 --> 01:07:29,901
- We'll all kiss the bride.
- Yes, of course.
1255
01:07:29,979 --> 01:07:32,971
- May we?
- Go ahead.
1256
01:07:36,986 --> 01:07:39,216
We are very happy.
1257
01:07:39,288 --> 01:07:42,451
We feel that you are marrying
all of us, a little.
1258
01:07:42,525 --> 01:07:44,220
Yes, yes, indeed.
1259
01:07:50,399 --> 01:07:53,027
We wish you every happiness, my dear.
1260
01:07:55,471 --> 01:07:56,802
All of us.
1261
01:08:00,209 --> 01:08:04,270
If we're gonna get started
this afternoon, I'd better be going.
1262
01:08:12,455 --> 01:08:13,547
Well.
1263
01:08:17,393 --> 01:08:20,760
- Kind of a cheesy picture of me, isn't it?
- Recognizable, thank heaven.
1264
01:08:20,830 --> 01:08:21,956
- Wait a minute.
- Get your things together
1265
01:08:22,031 --> 01:08:23,589
and get down the back stairs
before I call the police.
1266
01:08:23,666 --> 01:08:24,758
I've got something to say.
1267
01:08:24,834 --> 01:08:27,462
A gangster's moll thinking
she'd marry one of my professors.
1268
01:08:27,537 --> 01:08:29,368
Don't worry,
I'm not marrying any professor.
1269
01:08:29,438 --> 01:08:32,134
- Certainly not.
- I'm mink coat. I'm no bungalow apron.
1270
01:08:32,208 --> 01:08:33,641
That's the guy I'm getting.
1271
01:08:33,709 --> 01:08:35,870
Pretty good getting for a gal
that came up the hard way.
1272
01:08:35,945 --> 01:08:38,436
We'll have this room fumigated
when you're out of it.
1273
01:08:38,514 --> 01:08:39,742
- Well, you ought to, I guess.
- Let me past.
1274
01:08:39,816 --> 01:08:42,376
No, no, no, any spilling that's to be done,
I'll do, but not yet.
1275
01:08:42,451 --> 01:08:45,011
- Not while it would bug up everything.
- If you think I'll hold my tongue...
1276
01:08:45,087 --> 01:08:47,385
Why don't you look at it this way, Braggo?
The harm's been done.
1277
01:08:47,456 --> 01:08:50,482
Pottsy's gonna wear his heart in a sling
whether he finds out sooner or later.
1278
01:08:50,560 --> 01:08:53,427
Here or in New Jersey
won't make any difference to him.
1279
01:08:53,496 --> 01:08:56,056
Only, in New Jersey's
a darned sight better for me.
1280
01:08:56,132 --> 01:08:57,258
Better for you, indeed.
1281
01:08:57,333 --> 01:08:58,459
- No, no, no.
- Why, you, you...
1282
01:08:58,534 --> 01:09:01,002
- Open that door or I'll scream.
- No, I can't have you screaming, not now.
1283
01:09:01,070 --> 01:09:03,595
- A piercing scream...
- Sorry, Braggo.
1284
01:09:24,427 --> 01:09:26,019
- What did you say?
- What?
1285
01:09:26,095 --> 01:09:28,893
I was just running
through the marriage service.
1286
01:09:28,965 --> 01:09:30,262
"To be my lawful wedded wife.
1287
01:09:30,333 --> 01:09:32,358
"For better, for worse,
for richer, for poorer."
1288
01:09:32,435 --> 01:09:34,164
- Please, Pottsy.
- What?
1289
01:09:34,237 --> 01:09:35,704
Don't, please.
1290
01:09:37,506 --> 01:09:39,872
You're very nervous aren't you, darling?
1291
01:09:39,942 --> 01:09:41,603
It's been a very exciting day.
1292
01:09:41,677 --> 01:09:44,942
It's just this business of going to Jersey.
I mean, back home.
1293
01:09:45,014 --> 01:09:48,211
Every time I get to this old bridge,
I get worried for fear I might get stuck
1294
01:09:48,284 --> 01:09:50,081
and not be able to get back over again.
1295
01:09:50,152 --> 01:09:52,985
We'll bring you back, don't you be afraid.
1296
01:09:59,562 --> 01:10:01,086
Okay, go ahead.
1297
01:10:08,938 --> 01:10:11,463
- Hey.
- Sorry, sorry.
1298
01:10:11,540 --> 01:10:13,940
You trying to play piggy-back?
1299
01:10:14,010 --> 01:10:15,568
Listen to that.
1300
01:10:15,645 --> 01:10:18,512
- I don't see any reason for sarcasm.
- Neither do I.
1301
01:10:23,286 --> 01:10:25,254
Something wrong with your brakes,
sonny?
1302
01:10:25,321 --> 01:10:29,189
I couldn't locate it for a moment.
This is a rented car.
1303
01:10:29,258 --> 01:10:31,954
- Got a driver's license?
- I have, indeed.
1304
01:10:38,901 --> 01:10:43,167
"1903."
This should have been renewed 20 times.
1305
01:10:43,239 --> 01:10:45,366
- This is as far as you drive, brother.
- No, no.
1306
01:10:45,441 --> 01:10:48,308
But, Officer, this is a wedding party.
1307
01:10:49,445 --> 01:10:50,912
A wedding party?
1308
01:10:50,980 --> 01:10:53,141
- Are you the bridegroom?
- No, I am.
1309
01:10:53,215 --> 01:10:55,410
- Is this the bride?
- Yes.
1310
01:10:55,484 --> 01:10:56,883
- Pardon me.
- Officer, please.
1311
01:10:56,953 --> 01:10:57,942
What is it?
1312
01:10:58,020 --> 01:11:01,251
It's good luck to touch a bride,
and I got a promotion coming up.
1313
01:11:01,324 --> 01:11:04,851
Well, could you reciprocate
by letting us proceed?
1314
01:11:04,927 --> 01:11:06,417
- Yes, we'll drive very carefully.
- Yes.
1315
01:11:06,495 --> 01:11:09,225
Postponing a wedding
is bad luck, you know, Officer.
1316
01:11:09,298 --> 01:11:11,232
That's right.
Well, what are you waiting for?
1317
01:11:11,300 --> 01:11:12,892
- Get going.
- Okay.
1318
01:11:12,969 --> 01:11:14,596
A very nice gentleman.
1319
01:11:18,107 --> 01:11:20,940
All that nonsense with my driving license.
1320
01:11:22,144 --> 01:11:25,477
With that license I once drove
President Theodore Roosevelt.
1321
01:11:25,548 --> 01:11:27,778
And he pronounced my driving bully.
1322
01:11:28,951 --> 01:11:31,351
- He said that...
- Look out! Look out!
1323
01:11:35,257 --> 01:11:37,020
Look out, look out!
1324
01:11:55,644 --> 01:11:57,407
Help! Help!
1325
01:11:58,981 --> 01:12:02,417
Police! Police! Help! Help!
1326
01:12:03,052 --> 01:12:05,145
How's that, operator? No answer.
1327
01:12:05,221 --> 01:12:06,848
- Jam it.
- Jam it.
1328
01:12:10,593 --> 01:12:11,582
Huh?
1329
01:12:12,294 --> 01:12:15,559
All right, I didn't mean to say it, I'm sorry.
1330
01:12:15,631 --> 01:12:17,826
Hey, wait a minute,
there's a car driving up now.
1331
01:12:20,836 --> 01:12:23,202
Listen, sister, I said I was sorry.
What do you want me to do?
1332
01:12:23,272 --> 01:12:25,570
Send you a bouquet of...
1333
01:12:25,641 --> 01:12:28,371
It's you, wait a minute.
Hey, it's Sugarpuss.
1334
01:12:30,679 --> 01:12:32,943
Sugie, say,
what the sweet Judas gives out?
1335
01:12:33,015 --> 01:12:34,004
Where are you?
1336
01:12:34,083 --> 01:12:37,917
We're not down here to enjoy ourselves.
This is a wedding.
1337
01:12:37,987 --> 01:12:40,785
A what? They had an accident.
1338
01:12:41,490 --> 01:12:46,484
Nothing serious.
No, it just shook the old boys up a little.
1339
01:12:47,163 --> 01:12:49,529
I couldn't get to a phone before.
1340
01:12:49,598 --> 01:12:51,828
I don't know,
some little hotel near Kingston.
1341
01:12:51,901 --> 01:12:54,199
Poplar Grove, it's called. Yeah.
1342
01:12:55,504 --> 01:12:57,995
Oh, sure, Joe,
there's a midnight bus. I can grab that.
1343
01:12:58,074 --> 01:12:59,541
Midnight bus, what are you talking about?
1344
01:12:59,608 --> 01:13:02,736
I'll have Asthma and Pastrami
pick you up in about 40 minutes.
1345
01:13:02,812 --> 01:13:03,904
Sure tonight.
1346
01:13:03,979 --> 01:13:06,140
I've got a justice of the peace on call.
1347
01:13:06,215 --> 01:13:07,978
There'll be a justice
of the peace tomorrow.
1348
01:13:08,050 --> 01:13:09,984
Now, why not do this thing right?
1349
01:13:10,052 --> 01:13:14,284
I want to wait until the old boys go to bed.
I can't walk out on them cold.
1350
01:13:14,356 --> 01:13:15,448
Maybe you'd like to sit down
1351
01:13:15,524 --> 01:13:17,856
and knit them eight little sweaters
to remember you by.
1352
01:13:17,927 --> 01:13:21,158
I've told you how it's going to be,
now stop barking orders.
1353
01:13:21,230 --> 01:13:22,458
So long.
1354
01:13:26,168 --> 01:13:27,863
Get the car ready.
1355
01:13:29,472 --> 01:13:32,066
I could prove to you
by the laws of relativity
1356
01:13:32,141 --> 01:13:35,372
that it was not I who ran into the signpost,
1357
01:13:35,444 --> 01:13:37,639
but that it was the signpost which ran...
1358
01:13:37,713 --> 01:13:40,113
That's all right, go ahead, sit down.
1359
01:13:41,050 --> 01:13:44,144
But that it was the signpost
which ran into me.
1360
01:13:45,554 --> 01:13:46,680
Let me explain.
1361
01:13:46,755 --> 01:13:50,816
If you do, by that same law,
your head will run into this bottle.
1362
01:13:51,660 --> 01:13:55,357
- Before you do that, I'd like a drink, please.
- By all means, excuse me.
1363
01:13:55,431 --> 01:13:57,194
No, I think I'll hit the hay, get some sleep.
1364
01:13:57,266 --> 01:13:59,097
- Why?
- The evening's young yet.
1365
01:13:59,168 --> 01:14:01,568
Oh, no, I don't belong here.
This is a bachelor dinner.
1366
01:14:01,637 --> 01:14:03,969
- But this one is different.
- No, that's the law.
1367
01:14:04,039 --> 01:14:06,473
We've heard from the garage.
The car will be ready in the morning.
1368
01:14:06,542 --> 01:14:08,476
Perhaps it will hold together
until Rancocas.
1369
01:14:08,544 --> 01:14:09,602
Then we'll be leaving early.
1370
01:14:09,678 --> 01:14:14,342
Yeah, after issuing an urgent appeal
to all signposts not to charge at us.
1371
01:14:14,550 --> 01:14:15,574
That's right.
1372
01:14:15,651 --> 01:14:16,777
What...
1373
01:14:16,852 --> 01:14:19,116
What time shall we waken you,
about 7:30?
1374
01:14:19,188 --> 01:14:21,213
I'll be awake all right.
1375
01:14:22,158 --> 01:14:25,093
Well, kids, here's to you.
1376
01:14:25,161 --> 01:14:27,857
- Here's to you.
- Here's to all of us.
1377
01:14:27,930 --> 01:14:29,056
Yes, to all of us.
1378
01:14:34,069 --> 01:14:35,502
Pottsy, I...
1379
01:14:37,706 --> 01:14:40,174
You know,
you boys still have time to warn him.
1380
01:14:40,242 --> 01:14:43,370
- A man is a goof to marry any woman.
- Just let them try to warn me.
1381
01:14:43,445 --> 01:14:47,074
He'll have to console us that
there aren't seven more just like you.
1382
01:14:47,149 --> 01:14:50,846
- Yeah, one for each of us.
- Of assorted ages, of course.
1383
01:14:50,920 --> 01:14:52,251
Naturally.
1384
01:14:52,821 --> 01:14:53,810
I...
1385
01:14:54,857 --> 01:14:55,846
Well, I...
1386
01:14:56,425 --> 01:14:59,360
I'd like to keep you all in a locket, always.
1387
01:14:59,962 --> 01:15:03,125
Eight squirrelly cherubs
right out of this world.
1388
01:15:04,934 --> 01:15:07,630
- Bye, kids.
- Good night.
1389
01:15:07,970 --> 01:15:09,096
Goodnight.
1390
01:15:09,171 --> 01:15:11,731
Did you hear, Potts?
I'm a squirrelly cherub.
1391
01:15:32,361 --> 01:15:35,592
No, no, no.
No, I insist, the happiest marriages
1392
01:15:35,664 --> 01:15:37,894
are those which produce three children
1393
01:15:37,967 --> 01:15:41,232
at intervals of not less than two
or more than three years.
1394
01:15:42,871 --> 01:15:45,203
Gentlemen, gentlemen. Please.
1395
01:15:45,941 --> 01:15:49,138
You are all speaking very glibly
about a subject
1396
01:15:49,211 --> 01:15:51,475
of which you know practically nothing.
1397
01:15:51,547 --> 01:15:53,742
No, I know what I'm saying.
1398
01:15:53,816 --> 01:15:58,810
If you feel the need of any guidance,
may I suggest that you turn to me.
1399
01:15:58,887 --> 01:16:00,752
That's right.
You were married, weren't you?
1400
01:16:00,823 --> 01:16:05,556
Oh, yes. Genevieve has been dead
for some 24 years but...
1401
01:16:05,628 --> 01:16:09,530
I have relived every moment
of our happiness so many times.
1402
01:16:09,598 --> 01:16:12,726
And my experience
is entirely at your disposal, Bertram.
1403
01:16:12,801 --> 01:16:14,029
Thank you, Oddly, but I really...
1404
01:16:14,103 --> 01:16:19,666
I judge I do not have to start
with basic principles.
1405
01:16:20,576 --> 01:16:22,305
Being...
1406
01:16:22,678 --> 01:16:26,114
Being a botanist,
I find an astonishing parallel
1407
01:16:26,181 --> 01:16:29,810
between a woman's heart
and the wind flower
1408
01:16:29,885 --> 01:16:32,149
or Anemone nemorosa.
1409
01:16:32,221 --> 01:16:36,157
Perhaps you know the plant,
how it waits for the warm sunshine
1410
01:16:36,225 --> 01:16:40,821
and soft winds before it unfolds its petals.
1411
01:16:41,897 --> 01:16:43,489
Sensitive and delicate.
1412
01:16:43,565 --> 01:16:47,968
One rough, impetuous bee
can completely destroy the bloom.
1413
01:16:48,103 --> 01:16:50,230
Come out of the garden, will you, Oddly?
1414
01:16:50,306 --> 01:16:51,568
- Jerome.
- Have a heart.
1415
01:16:51,640 --> 01:16:52,834
I'm much obliged to you, Oddly, but I...
1416
01:16:52,908 --> 01:16:57,106
Please, please, Bertram.
Think of me as an elder brother
1417
01:16:57,179 --> 01:17:01,548
or father, anxious to send you off properly.
1418
01:17:02,117 --> 01:17:04,347
As we all are. Of course.
1419
01:17:04,420 --> 01:17:06,684
Now, tenderness,
1420
01:17:07,423 --> 01:17:11,553
that is what I advocate.
Tenderness and patience.
1421
01:17:12,961 --> 01:17:15,020
Genevieve was a watercolorist.
1422
01:17:15,097 --> 01:17:19,693
Therefore, after the wedding reception,
we went straight to the Catskills.
1423
01:17:22,338 --> 01:17:27,640
We spent there a beautiful week
filled with promise.
1424
01:17:28,377 --> 01:17:31,972
And returned to New York
with 14 excellent watercolors.
1425
01:17:32,614 --> 01:17:34,047
Fourteen watercolors.
1426
01:17:34,116 --> 01:17:38,416
Back in New York, I flung my enthusiasm
into preparing a lecture,
1427
01:17:38,487 --> 01:17:40,717
"The Flora of the Catskills,"
1428
01:17:40,789 --> 01:17:43,519
whilst Genevieve painted
a flight of swallows
1429
01:17:43,592 --> 01:17:46,117
around the walls of our living room.
1430
01:17:46,695 --> 01:17:47,889
Ah, me.
1431
01:17:48,897 --> 01:17:53,459
I remember for three months,
every time I bade her goodnight
1432
01:17:53,535 --> 01:17:56,732
I would kiss the palm of her little hand,
1433
01:17:56,805 --> 01:17:59,638
astonished at my own boldness.
1434
01:17:59,708 --> 01:18:01,699
What did you say
the name of the flower was?
1435
01:18:01,777 --> 01:18:05,269
Anemone nemorosa,
of the buttercup family.
1436
01:18:06,148 --> 01:18:09,709
Genevieve was a blonde.
1437
01:18:11,453 --> 01:18:13,546
Here is a lock of her hair.
1438
01:18:14,022 --> 01:18:15,489
- Very lovely.
- Yes.
1439
01:18:15,557 --> 01:18:18,526
I remember, it used to shine a great deal.
1440
01:18:18,594 --> 01:18:22,121
And there was a song at that time
everyone sang.
1441
01:18:22,798 --> 01:18:25,562
Unfortunately, I can never carry a tune.
1442
01:18:27,035 --> 01:18:28,400
That's it.
1443
01:18:30,839 --> 01:18:32,568
Please sing it all.
1444
01:18:33,876 --> 01:18:35,935
1445
01:18:36,779 --> 01:18:38,770
Does anyone else know it?
1446
01:19:01,103 --> 01:19:02,695
Please sing it again.
1447
01:19:09,912 --> 01:19:13,211
1448
01:19:36,171 --> 01:19:37,661
Please, go on.
1449
01:19:44,079 --> 01:19:46,206
Thank you, thank you so much.
1450
01:20:21,617 --> 01:20:22,948
Good boy.
1451
01:20:33,195 --> 01:20:35,493
Robinson, what did you make
of what Oddly was saying?
1452
01:20:35,564 --> 01:20:37,759
Don't ask me, Potts. He's the expert.
1453
01:20:37,833 --> 01:20:41,269
- What's his bungalow number?
- I don't know. Ask Peagram.
1454
01:20:41,336 --> 01:20:44,134
Peagram, what's the number
of Oddly's bungalow?
1455
01:20:44,206 --> 01:20:45,605
He's in six.
1456
01:21:09,765 --> 01:21:10,925
Oddly?
1457
01:21:13,235 --> 01:21:14,998
I'm sorry, Oddly,
but I've got to talk this out.
1458
01:21:15,070 --> 01:21:18,267
I must get this off my chest
before it stifles me.
1459
01:21:19,341 --> 01:21:20,831
If you don't mind,
we won't turn on the light
1460
01:21:20,909 --> 01:21:24,106
while we're discussing
these things extremely personal.
1461
01:21:24,179 --> 01:21:25,976
What you said,
1462
01:21:26,048 --> 01:21:29,814
I recognize the beauty and delicacy
of the relationship you described.
1463
01:21:29,885 --> 01:21:32,353
But I'm... I don't trust myself.
1464
01:21:32,421 --> 01:21:35,185
I'm afraid
I'm a lot bolder than you are, Oddly.
1465
01:21:35,257 --> 01:21:38,124
You don't think that would necessarily
endanger everything? Do you?
1466
01:21:38,193 --> 01:21:41,685
Why, the very idea that I should
have to spend my honeymoon
1467
01:21:41,763 --> 01:21:43,731
watching her paint in watercolors
1468
01:21:43,799 --> 01:21:47,565
just because she's like somebody
from the buttercup family, I...
1469
01:21:48,904 --> 01:21:50,895
I'm a man in love.
It's the first time in my life.
1470
01:21:50,973 --> 01:21:52,907
I want to take her in my arms.
1471
01:21:52,975 --> 01:21:57,139
I thought because I was young,
I had self-control but that's not true.
1472
01:21:57,212 --> 01:21:59,476
I think of her every waking moment.
1473
01:21:59,548 --> 01:22:02,415
Why, if this marriage had been delayed,
I mean, should have been delayed,
1474
01:22:02,484 --> 01:22:04,281
I mean, should be...
1475
01:22:05,053 --> 01:22:08,113
Listen to that.
Oddly, I don't know my tenses anymore.
1476
01:22:08,190 --> 01:22:12,286
I've gone goofy, completely goofy,
bim-buggy, slap-happy.
1477
01:22:12,361 --> 01:22:15,956
Can a man like that keep his mind
on the Anemone nemorosa?
1478
01:22:16,832 --> 01:22:19,357
- Pottsy.
- What...
1479
01:22:24,673 --> 01:22:29,269
I'm sorry, I don't know
how I could have made such a mistake.
1480
01:22:29,344 --> 01:22:33,075
To say such things to a woman.
You'll have to forgive me.
1481
01:22:33,649 --> 01:22:35,742
Don't apologize, Pottsy.
1482
01:22:36,218 --> 01:22:38,482
It was illuminating.
1483
01:22:42,090 --> 01:22:43,523
Professor Potts!
1484
01:22:45,594 --> 01:22:48,995
- Somebody is calling me.
- Are they?
1485
01:22:51,133 --> 01:22:53,067
Maybe it's just as well.
1486
01:22:53,135 --> 01:22:55,160
- Professor Potts!
- Professor Potts!
1487
01:22:56,672 --> 01:22:58,162
I'll be back.
1488
01:23:11,286 --> 01:23:12,981
- Were you calling me?
- Yes, we were, Potts.
1489
01:23:13,055 --> 01:23:15,182
Potts, something has come up.
1490
01:23:15,257 --> 01:23:17,020
- Yes, well...
- Well, what?
1491
01:23:17,926 --> 01:23:21,862
- You better tell him, Martin.
- Maybe he'd better tell him.
1492
01:23:21,930 --> 01:23:23,329
- Who?
- Potts.
1493
01:23:25,400 --> 01:23:26,560
There's a gentleman here. No.
1494
01:23:26,635 --> 01:23:27,727
There's a man here. No.
1495
01:23:27,803 --> 01:23:31,068
- Four men, four men inside.
- Yes, they'll tell you.
1496
01:23:40,749 --> 01:23:44,446
- Well, what...
- So you're the bridegroom?
1497
01:23:44,519 --> 01:23:47,886
- Yes. This is Professor Potts.
- How are you, Bertram?
1498
01:23:49,324 --> 01:23:52,157
I thought
you'd look like these other squats,
1499
01:23:52,227 --> 01:23:54,821
only with a beard and pea soup on it.
1500
01:23:55,297 --> 01:23:57,822
What about me evoked
this interest on your part?
1501
01:23:57,899 --> 01:24:00,663
- Sounds like it was engraved, don't it?
- Yeah.
1502
01:24:00,736 --> 01:24:04,069
- What is this all about?
- It's about Sugarpuss.
1503
01:24:04,139 --> 01:24:08,132
- Perhaps if we talked to him...
- There's been too many detours as is.
1504
01:24:08,210 --> 01:24:11,771
Maybe you recognize my voice, Bertram,
do you?
1505
01:24:14,616 --> 01:24:16,243
How's your sinus?
1506
01:24:17,986 --> 01:24:20,682
- You're not her father.
- You're getting warm.
1507
01:24:20,756 --> 01:24:21,745
I'm her daddy.
1508
01:24:22,891 --> 01:24:23,880
Shut up.
1509
01:24:24,359 --> 01:24:27,351
I believe I'm entitled to some clarification.
1510
01:24:29,197 --> 01:24:30,391
So am I.
1511
01:24:40,609 --> 01:24:41,906
Lipstick.
1512
01:24:46,148 --> 01:24:47,877
What are you doing?
1513
01:24:49,618 --> 01:24:51,449
Calm down now, Wimpy.
1514
01:24:56,091 --> 01:24:58,685
I was kind of counting on Sugarpuss
to tell you the score.
1515
01:24:58,760 --> 01:25:02,093
Trouble is she's all right giving out
with the twists and the wise cracks.
1516
01:25:02,164 --> 01:25:03,756
When it comes to leveling off,
she gets chicken.
1517
01:25:03,832 --> 01:25:06,528
He's trying to say that our wedding trip
was nothing but a vast lie.
1518
01:25:06,601 --> 01:25:08,296
A vast lie?
1519
01:25:08,370 --> 01:25:09,894
Don't you believe it, Bertram.
1520
01:25:09,971 --> 01:25:12,940
There's going to be a wedding all right,
with Sugarpuss the bride.
1521
01:25:13,008 --> 01:25:14,032
Only I'm the bridegroom.
1522
01:25:15,443 --> 01:25:16,501
Shake it off.
1523
01:25:18,713 --> 01:25:22,444
I certainly do appreciate the way
you guys delivered a hot cargo.
1524
01:25:23,952 --> 01:25:26,352
She was to be handled with care.
1525
01:25:26,421 --> 01:25:31,984
- Potts, it seems that your bride to be...
- His bride. That's a laugh.
1526
01:25:32,828 --> 01:25:37,026
It seems that Sugarpuss has used us
to circumvent the police.
1527
01:25:37,098 --> 01:25:40,465
- We serving as protective coloration.
Yes.
1528
01:25:40,535 --> 01:25:41,729
I don't believe it.
1529
01:25:41,803 --> 01:25:44,135
Professor, you really thought
she was going to marry you
1530
01:25:44,206 --> 01:25:47,175
with your $3,000 what-was-it a year?
1531
01:25:47,242 --> 01:25:49,972
She spends that much
for having her toenails painted.
1532
01:25:50,045 --> 01:25:52,775
She sulks if she has to wear
last year's ermine.
1533
01:25:55,450 --> 01:25:57,884
He don't believe it. Look at him.
1534
01:25:58,854 --> 01:26:02,381
All right. Suppose you go tell Sugarpuss
Daddy's here.
1535
01:26:06,728 --> 01:26:08,525
Joe Lilac's the name.
1536
01:26:20,208 --> 01:26:22,335
Professor Potts! Professor Potts!
1537
01:26:22,410 --> 01:26:23,900
- Why, Miss Bragg.
- Is it too late?
1538
01:26:23,979 --> 01:26:25,742
Have you married that girl?
She knocked me out.
1539
01:26:25,814 --> 01:26:27,714
Nine hours in a closet.
Something told me all along.
1540
01:26:27,782 --> 01:26:29,477
Hold the phone, sister.
1541
01:26:29,551 --> 01:26:30,711
We traced you through your accident.
1542
01:26:30,785 --> 01:26:33,549
There's a warrant from the DA's office
for this girlfriend of Lilac's.
1543
01:26:33,622 --> 01:26:35,112
Where is she?
1544
01:26:57,412 --> 01:26:59,937
There's a Mr. Lilac waiting for you.
1545
01:27:00,548 --> 01:27:01,640
Yeah.
1546
01:27:02,584 --> 01:27:06,076
The situation has been explained to me
in simple terms.
1547
01:27:06,655 --> 01:27:11,752
You don't have to worry about the police.
I told them you and he left a half hour ago.
1548
01:27:11,826 --> 01:27:13,623
Probably were in Trenton by now.
1549
01:27:13,695 --> 01:27:16,129
- Thanks, Pottsy.
- Thanks for what?
1550
01:27:16,731 --> 01:27:20,565
You've given us all a fine course in
the theory and practice of being a sucker.
1551
01:27:20,635 --> 01:27:23,103
It was a very small tuition fee.
1552
01:27:23,171 --> 01:27:25,366
Perhaps it wasn't quite worthy
of you choosing us
1553
01:27:25,440 --> 01:27:28,068
as subjects of your demonstration.
1554
01:27:28,777 --> 01:27:32,338
Eight pushovers,
like shooting fish in a barrel.
1555
01:27:33,682 --> 01:27:34,671
I...
1556
01:27:35,383 --> 01:27:38,011
I didn't want you to get it this way.
1557
01:27:38,553 --> 01:27:40,418
Not right in the face.
1558
01:27:41,723 --> 01:27:43,156
I've been...
1559
01:27:44,292 --> 01:27:47,784
I've been sitting here
trying to write you a letter.
1560
01:27:47,862 --> 01:27:49,853
Here are all my excuses.
1561
01:27:53,601 --> 01:27:57,503
The handwriting of a...
What would be your word for it?
1562
01:28:04,512 --> 01:28:05,809
A tramp.
1563
01:28:29,337 --> 01:28:31,965
- Good morning, Miss Bragg.
- Good morning, gentlemen.
1564
01:28:32,040 --> 01:28:34,565
What about some nice hot breakfast?
I made some Parker House rolls.
1565
01:28:34,642 --> 01:28:36,439
- No, thank you.
- Even have some jam.
1566
01:28:36,511 --> 01:28:37,876
Strawberry jam, Professor Oddly.
1567
01:28:37,946 --> 01:28:39,937
Thank you, Miss Bragg,
but I don't think so.
1568
01:28:40,015 --> 01:28:41,949
- Nobody wants any breakfast?
- No, thank you.
1569
01:28:42,017 --> 01:28:44,451
Why? What? Very well.
1570
01:29:05,206 --> 01:29:07,640
Gentlemen, just a moment, please.
1571
01:29:08,510 --> 01:29:11,343
Before we attempt to get back to work,
I'd like to say a few words.
1572
01:29:11,413 --> 01:29:16,180
You've been very kind and very tactful.
If I may say so, over-tactful.
1573
01:29:17,352 --> 01:29:18,717
The entire ride home in the car,
1574
01:29:18,787 --> 01:29:22,553
you avoided a certain subject
and made empty conversation.
1575
01:29:22,624 --> 01:29:25,491
Now, let's have it out.
I made an ass of myself and I know it.
1576
01:29:25,560 --> 01:29:27,585
Oh, well, we all have, Potts.
1577
01:29:27,662 --> 01:29:29,823
Yes, but I was the lead donkey.
1578
01:29:30,398 --> 01:29:35,028
Why not just regard the episode
as a prolonged constitutional?
1579
01:29:35,103 --> 01:29:37,196
That's right. That's what we'll do.
1580
01:29:37,272 --> 01:29:38,296
Thank you.
1581
01:29:38,373 --> 01:29:41,934
What happened to our emotions
can't be undone.
1582
01:29:42,010 --> 01:29:44,604
What happened to our work
must be remedied.
1583
01:29:44,679 --> 01:29:48,775
I'm sorry, but because of me
we must work two extra hours a day.
1584
01:29:48,850 --> 01:29:50,442
In a month,
we'll be back on schedule again.
1585
01:29:50,518 --> 01:29:51,712
- Sure.
- That's right.
1586
01:29:51,786 --> 01:29:53,344
Now, we are all scholars.
1587
01:29:53,421 --> 01:29:56,049
Let us withdraw behind our wall of books,
1588
01:29:56,124 --> 01:29:59,355
and may her name never
be brought up in this house again.
1589
01:29:59,427 --> 01:30:03,363
- We didn't mention it, Potts.
- Not even by omitting it so obviously.
1590
01:30:03,431 --> 01:30:06,059
Excuse me, Bertram, but...
1591
01:30:06,134 --> 01:30:09,626
Well, now that
we are burying her memory,
1592
01:30:09,704 --> 01:30:14,300
I feel it only fair, you see,
she gave me something for you.
1593
01:30:14,375 --> 01:30:19,972
I found her crying in her bungalow,
and she slipped your ring into my pocket.
1594
01:30:20,048 --> 01:30:21,743
Put it in the wastebasket, please, Oddly.
1595
01:30:21,816 --> 01:30:23,545
Just a moment.
Just a moment.
1596
01:30:23,618 --> 01:30:27,384
- Is this your ring, Potts?
- That for $39.85?
1597
01:30:27,455 --> 01:30:30,481
- Doesn't look like it.
- Why, no it is not.
1598
01:30:30,558 --> 01:30:32,526
- Are you sure?
- Positive.
1599
01:30:33,461 --> 01:30:39,093
Because if this is the one she gave
back to you and not the one you gave her,
1600
01:30:40,268 --> 01:30:41,565
it's enormously interesting.
1601
01:30:41,636 --> 01:30:44,196
- But why?
- Why? How so?
1602
01:30:45,473 --> 01:30:47,100
Potts.
1603
01:30:47,175 --> 01:30:49,302
- She loves you.
- How can you say that?
1604
01:30:49,377 --> 01:30:51,538
Please, she happened
to pull that one off by mistake.
1605
01:30:51,613 --> 01:30:54,081
- Not according to Professor Freud.
- Freud?
1606
01:30:54,149 --> 01:30:56,982
The subconscious mind
never makes mistakes.
1607
01:30:57,819 --> 01:31:01,152
She gave you the ring she didn't want,
his ring.
1608
01:31:02,023 --> 01:31:05,857
And she kept the one she wanted, yours.
1609
01:31:05,927 --> 01:31:09,727
- That's right, Potts.
- Bosh and nonsense.
1610
01:31:09,797 --> 01:31:11,321
I agree with Miss Bragg.
1611
01:31:11,399 --> 01:31:14,300
I refuse to be coddled with
a lot of psychoanalytical nonsense.
1612
01:31:14,369 --> 01:31:17,270
As one who understands a woman's heart,
I would like to...
1613
01:31:21,509 --> 01:31:23,136
- Good morning.
- Good morning.
1614
01:31:23,211 --> 01:31:24,906
Quite an eventful night
last night, gentlemen.
1615
01:31:24,979 --> 01:31:26,344
At least, so we see by the papers.
1616
01:31:27,515 --> 01:31:31,110
We're quite fresh this morning, however.
And we're going back to work with a will.
1617
01:31:31,186 --> 01:31:32,813
- Yes, indeed.
- There's no hurry about that.
1618
01:31:32,887 --> 01:31:35,720
- Not any longer.
- We've had quite enough of your activities.
1619
01:31:35,790 --> 01:31:39,248
It has cost the estate some $300,000
to at last have its name
1620
01:31:39,327 --> 01:31:41,352
spread across every tabloid in New York.
1621
01:31:41,429 --> 01:31:44,193
"Night club babe hides out
in Totten Foundation."
1622
01:31:44,265 --> 01:31:46,165
- And this one.
- Yes.
1623
01:31:46,868 --> 01:31:49,666
"Professor bridegroom carries
ball of fire across state line."
1624
01:31:49,737 --> 01:31:51,534
And many others like it.
1625
01:31:51,606 --> 01:31:56,202
For my father, I feel profound humiliation.
For myself, unutterable disgust.
1626
01:31:56,277 --> 01:31:57,938
- Shall I go ahead?
- Please.
1627
01:31:58,012 --> 01:31:59,445
For the aforesaid reasons,
1628
01:31:59,514 --> 01:32:01,607
Miss Totten has decided
to discontinue the encyclopedia.
1629
01:32:01,683 --> 01:32:02,741
What?
1630
01:32:02,817 --> 01:32:04,842
- How soon can you vacate?
- Vacate? After nine years?
1631
01:32:04,919 --> 01:32:07,012
- Expelled in disgrace?
- Pull the chair from under us?
1632
01:32:07,088 --> 01:32:09,215
Thrown out like eight old shoes?
1633
01:32:09,290 --> 01:32:12,020
I'm sorry, gentlemen,
but my mind's made up.
1634
01:32:12,093 --> 01:32:13,321
Go ahead, Mr. Larsen.
1635
01:32:13,394 --> 01:32:15,385
Several real estate firms
are interested in this property.
1636
01:32:15,463 --> 01:32:18,489
One of the companies wants to erect
an apartment house here, giving you...
1637
01:32:18,566 --> 01:32:19,794
Whoa! Please don't do that.
1638
01:32:19,867 --> 01:32:21,198
I'm sorry.
1639
01:32:21,803 --> 01:32:24,363
One word, Miss Totten, may I?
1640
01:32:24,439 --> 01:32:28,000
In your very understandable excitement,
a great injustice is being done.
1641
01:32:28,076 --> 01:32:29,236
I am the guilty one.
1642
01:32:29,310 --> 01:32:32,336
And I accept my dishonorable discharge
without protest,
1643
01:32:32,413 --> 01:32:35,075
but that others should suffer
and be punished
1644
01:32:35,149 --> 01:32:37,583
for my misconduct
is unthinkable.
1645
01:32:39,120 --> 01:32:41,452
Oh, my goodness, what was that?
1646
01:32:45,893 --> 01:32:47,656
- Good morning.
- Good morning.
1647
01:32:47,729 --> 01:32:51,165
Everybody line up over there,
like for a photograph.
1648
01:32:52,467 --> 01:32:54,833
With you, Bertram, in the foreground.
1649
01:32:54,902 --> 01:32:56,426
Come on, get going.
1650
01:32:56,504 --> 01:32:59,871
Get around, get around. Go on.
Faster. Keep moving.
1651
01:33:01,242 --> 01:33:05,542
Saint Valentine's Day!
1652
01:33:22,930 --> 01:33:25,262
Is the bride ready yet?
1653
01:33:25,333 --> 01:33:27,198
- No, not yet.
- What?
1654
01:33:27,969 --> 01:33:31,837
- Louder, please.
- We're still talking it over.
1655
01:33:31,906 --> 01:33:33,931
Good idea. Important step.
1656
01:33:35,209 --> 01:33:38,701
- Hey, wait a minute. Where you going?
- For lunch. Five minutes late.
1657
01:33:38,780 --> 01:33:42,773
- When are you going to be back?
- After I've ate and had my nap.
1658
01:33:43,384 --> 01:33:45,784
How long are we gonna argue this?
1659
01:33:46,454 --> 01:33:49,753
- Now look, Sugie.
- I said no. And no is no.
1660
01:33:49,824 --> 01:33:52,952
Sugie, when I was nine years old,
I was in love with my piano teacher.
1661
01:33:53,027 --> 01:33:55,825
She played classical.
You're not nine years old.
1662
01:33:55,897 --> 01:33:56,886
I love him.
1663
01:33:56,964 --> 01:33:59,432
- She loves him.
- Yes, I love him.
1664
01:33:59,500 --> 01:34:02,594
I love those hick shirts he wears
with the boiled cuffs.
1665
01:34:02,670 --> 01:34:04,831
And the way he always has
his vest buttoned wrong.
1666
01:34:04,906 --> 01:34:07,374
Looks like a giraffe and I love him.
1667
01:34:07,442 --> 01:34:08,841
I love him because he's the kind of a guy
1668
01:34:08,910 --> 01:34:11,902
that gets drunk on a glass of buttermilk.
1669
01:34:11,979 --> 01:34:15,380
And I love the way
he blushes right up over his ears.
1670
01:34:16,617 --> 01:34:20,212
I love him because he doesn't know
how to kiss, the jerk.
1671
01:34:21,022 --> 01:34:24,185
I love him, Joe.
That's what I'm trying to tell you.
1672
01:34:24,258 --> 01:34:26,249
I'll never see him again.
1673
01:34:26,928 --> 01:34:29,294
But I'm not gonna marry you.
1674
01:34:29,364 --> 01:34:31,491
Not if you tie a ton of cement
around my neck
1675
01:34:31,566 --> 01:34:34,091
and throw me into the East River
like you did to all the others.
1676
01:34:34,168 --> 01:34:35,999
- I tell you, Joe was framed.
- Oh, sure, sure.
1677
01:34:36,070 --> 01:34:38,504
So you tell me, I know better now.
1678
01:34:39,374 --> 01:34:42,036
I guess she'd better talk to her professor.
Get him on the phone.
1679
01:34:42,110 --> 01:34:43,668
You leave him out of this.
1680
01:34:43,745 --> 01:34:46,236
Imagine that big giraffe
at the bottom of the East River.
1681
01:34:46,314 --> 01:34:48,578
You wouldn't like that to happen
to him, would you, Sugarpuss?
1682
01:34:48,649 --> 01:34:51,083
- That ain't funny, McGee.
- Who said it's funny?
1683
01:34:51,152 --> 01:34:52,744
I mean business.
1684
01:34:53,488 --> 01:34:55,854
That is if you don't say "I do"
like a nice little bride.
1685
01:34:55,923 --> 01:34:56,912
Uh-uh.
1686
01:34:57,492 --> 01:35:00,893
I kind of figured you'd bumped your brains
into one of them pink clouds.
1687
01:35:00,962 --> 01:35:03,726
- You can't do this, Joe.
- It's too late, Sugie.
1688
01:35:03,798 --> 01:35:06,528
- The pressure's on already.
- What is this? Putting the screws on me?
1689
01:35:06,601 --> 01:35:08,933
You said it,
and right where it'll do the most good.
1690
01:35:09,003 --> 01:35:11,699
- Neighborhood of the heart.
- Hello.
1691
01:35:11,773 --> 01:35:14,435
This is McNeary. Hang on. Here you are.
1692
01:35:15,376 --> 01:35:16,775
You take it.
1693
01:35:21,149 --> 01:35:23,014
- Hello?
- Hello, Sugie.
1694
01:35:24,185 --> 01:35:25,948
Sure, it's Pastrami.
1695
01:35:28,055 --> 01:35:29,989
Just dropped in on the boys,
Asthma and me,
1696
01:35:30,057 --> 01:35:32,389
with our little old typewriters.
1697
01:35:33,361 --> 01:35:35,090
That's up to the boss.
We're waiting for orders.
1698
01:35:36,364 --> 01:35:39,094
- For orders?
- Can we make a deal now, Sugie?
1699
01:35:39,834 --> 01:35:44,362
Sure we can, brother.
Put him on, Pastrami, just a word.
1700
01:35:45,640 --> 01:35:48,370
Would you mind stepping
to the phone, Professor Potts?
1701
01:35:48,443 --> 01:35:50,638
A lady friend of yours.
1702
01:35:50,711 --> 01:35:53,339
I have nothing to say to Miss O'Shea.
1703
01:35:54,015 --> 01:35:57,576
- Oh, please, please!
- You haven't?
1704
01:35:57,652 --> 01:35:58,641
Just a moment.
1705
01:35:58,719 --> 01:36:00,380
Goodness, this is awful.
Yesterday, a nightclub...
1706
01:36:00,455 --> 01:36:02,116
Shut your clam, sister.
1707
01:36:02,190 --> 01:36:03,350
Hello.
1708
01:36:04,158 --> 01:36:07,286
Yes, Miss O'Shea, this is Professor Potts.
1709
01:36:07,361 --> 01:36:09,226
Your friends are here.
1710
01:36:09,864 --> 01:36:12,856
Not at all.
Your methods are familiar by now.
1711
01:36:12,934 --> 01:36:15,494
I don't know the exact purpose
of this maneuver.
1712
01:36:15,570 --> 01:36:18,038
What more can be gained from us?
1713
01:36:18,105 --> 01:36:20,573
But I hope
that it works to your advantage.
1714
01:36:21,642 --> 01:36:24,702
I'm sorry, Pottsy,
but it'll be all right in a little while.
1715
01:36:24,779 --> 01:36:29,478
They won't hurt anybody.
Just don't do anything foolish.
1716
01:36:29,550 --> 01:36:31,643
- Promise me, Pottsy.
- Give it.
1717
01:36:34,589 --> 01:36:37,615
Okay, Bertram, put Pastrami back on.
1718
01:36:38,259 --> 01:36:40,727
I imagine he wants to talk to you.
1719
01:36:41,696 --> 01:36:43,027
Yes, boss?
1720
01:36:43,698 --> 01:36:48,567
Okay, we'll wait for the call.
And best wishes, boss. Congratulations.
1721
01:36:50,271 --> 01:36:54,002
Well, all we have to do
is to wait for the all-clear signal.
1722
01:36:55,009 --> 01:36:58,342
We'll dismiss the class
right after the ceremony.
1723
01:36:58,412 --> 01:37:01,973
- Did you say after the ceremony?
- That's what I said.
1724
01:37:02,049 --> 01:37:03,448
You mean they're not married yet?
1725
01:37:03,518 --> 01:37:05,349
Why do you think
we're futzing around with these?
1726
01:37:05,419 --> 01:37:06,545
Well, I don't know, I thought...
1727
01:37:06,621 --> 01:37:10,648
A little trouble with Sugarpuss'
vocal chords. Wouldn't say yes.
1728
01:37:11,025 --> 01:37:13,516
She wouldn't say yes? What...
1729
01:37:13,594 --> 01:37:15,027
You very ugly young man,
1730
01:37:15,096 --> 01:37:17,826
you know, to me at this moment
you look perfectly delightful?
1731
01:37:17,899 --> 01:37:19,457
- I mean absolutely beautiful.
- I what?
1732
01:37:19,534 --> 01:37:21,058
- Positively wonderful.
- Are you nuts?
1733
01:37:21,135 --> 01:37:23,296
No, I feel like yodeling.
1734
01:37:25,873 --> 01:37:27,135
Pardon me.
1735
01:37:27,208 --> 01:37:31,008
Dr. Gurkakoff,
my apologies to Professor Freud.
1736
01:37:31,078 --> 01:37:32,340
Thank you.
1737
01:37:32,413 --> 01:37:35,109
But you don't understand.
This visit is no longer a mystery.
1738
01:37:35,182 --> 01:37:36,877
Apparently, it requires those two guns
1739
01:37:36,951 --> 01:37:39,852
leveled on us
to force Sugarpuss to marry Mr. Lilac.
1740
01:37:40,087 --> 01:37:41,520
- You mean to say that...
- Yes.
1741
01:37:41,589 --> 01:37:44,615
- That explains everything.
- Break it up, break it up.
1742
01:37:44,692 --> 01:37:46,523
- We can't allow that.
- No, no, indeed.
1743
01:37:46,594 --> 01:37:48,186
Can't, huh?
What do you think we're here for?
1744
01:37:48,262 --> 01:37:52,255
But, young man, you see,
we all love this young lady very dearly.
1745
01:37:52,333 --> 01:37:54,233
Better look out. It's gonna spit.
1746
01:37:54,302 --> 01:37:55,963
What is going to... Oh, dear.
1747
01:37:56,037 --> 01:37:59,404
- Now, sit down, all of you. Sit down.
- Yes, we're... I mean, we're...
1748
01:38:06,380 --> 01:38:07,404
Ah.
1749
01:38:07,481 --> 01:38:10,712
Don't look so big now,
them eight big brains.
1750
01:38:10,785 --> 01:38:12,548
Not to me they don't.
1751
01:38:13,988 --> 01:38:15,615
You are under the impression
that you are big
1752
01:38:15,690 --> 01:38:16,850
because you have those firearms
1753
01:38:16,924 --> 01:38:19,654
because you know how to load them
and pull the trigger.
1754
01:38:19,727 --> 01:38:22,161
It would be interesting
to teach them the contrary...
1755
01:38:22,229 --> 01:38:24,254
Button it up, understand?
1756
01:38:26,267 --> 01:38:29,031
Hey, fellows, this won't take a second.
1757
01:38:29,103 --> 01:38:31,298
They're pulling a double or nothing
on that quizzola.
1758
01:38:31,372 --> 01:38:34,068
Three new questions. First.
1759
01:38:34,141 --> 01:38:36,905
"The sword of Damocles, was that a..."
1760
01:38:38,212 --> 01:38:40,009
Say, was you holding a meeting
or something?
1761
01:38:40,081 --> 01:38:42,049
More like a wake, maybe.
1762
01:38:45,553 --> 01:38:48,215
- Excuse me.
- Just a minute, Jack.
1763
01:38:48,789 --> 01:38:52,247
We got a loge seat for you,
right in the back row.
1764
01:38:52,326 --> 01:38:53,918
This way, please.
1765
01:39:00,267 --> 01:39:01,734
That's right.
1766
01:39:02,937 --> 01:39:04,427
Now, sit down.
1767
01:39:22,223 --> 01:39:26,751
Young man, your...
You don't mind if we talk, do you?
1768
01:39:26,827 --> 01:39:29,125
- Just keep it funny.
- Thank you.
1769
01:39:29,797 --> 01:39:34,063
Your question as you came in was about
the sword of Damocles, I believe.
1770
01:39:34,368 --> 01:39:35,426
Yeah.
1771
01:39:35,503 --> 01:39:38,063
- But I'd just as soon skip it.
- No, but it's a very interesting subject.
1772
01:39:38,139 --> 01:39:40,334
- Never mind.
- Yeah, but I do mind.
1773
01:39:41,042 --> 01:39:43,840
I just wanted to tell you
that the sword of Damocles
1774
01:39:43,911 --> 01:39:45,606
was suspended over his head.
1775
01:39:45,680 --> 01:39:48,114
- Yes, by a single hair.
- Exactly.
1776
01:39:48,215 --> 01:39:52,549
Did you hear that, Robinson?
Suspended over his head by a single hair.
1777
01:39:52,620 --> 01:39:54,850
A constant source of danger.
1778
01:39:54,922 --> 01:39:57,982
Mr. Pastrami,
you know your history, don't you?
1779
01:39:58,693 --> 01:40:03,187
It's not one of my best points.
I never went in for that kind of stuff.
1780
01:40:03,864 --> 01:40:07,391
- At least, not very much.
- Well, I thought I'd just ask you.
1781
01:40:07,468 --> 01:40:10,494
- A very interesting lesson indeed.
- Yes.
1782
01:40:11,205 --> 01:40:15,574
Yes, indeed. I've always found it
a most absorbing subject.
1783
01:40:15,643 --> 01:40:18,134
But Mr. Totten is not suspended by a hair.
1784
01:40:20,014 --> 01:40:21,379
Uh-uh.
1785
01:40:21,449 --> 01:40:24,976
No secrets, boys, talk upstairs.
1786
01:40:25,052 --> 01:40:27,782
- I thought you'd see it.
- Don't you agree, Dr. Gurkakoff?
1787
01:40:27,855 --> 01:40:30,187
- What did you say?
- I said, don't you agree?
1788
01:40:30,257 --> 01:40:34,751
Yes, yes, yes. A danger very often
overhangs the unsuspecting.
1789
01:40:34,829 --> 01:40:36,194
What kind of jive is that?
1790
01:40:36,263 --> 01:40:38,823
If you're gonna talk, talk so we can dig it.
1791
01:40:38,899 --> 01:40:41,265
Oh, I'm sorry. We'll try.
1792
01:40:41,335 --> 01:40:43,496
- Dr. Gurkakoff?
- Yeah?
1793
01:40:43,571 --> 01:40:46,563
What was that about
the Roman fleet and Archimedes?
1794
01:40:46,640 --> 01:40:49,700
I don't remember.
You know, it's not exactly...
1795
01:40:49,777 --> 01:40:52,803
Why, he set it afire
with the use of reflectors.
1796
01:40:52,880 --> 01:40:56,008
You can talk just as well sitting down,
can't you?
1797
01:40:56,083 --> 01:40:57,641
Yes, yes.
1798
01:40:58,352 --> 01:41:01,617
I find that vastly instructive,
don't you, Dr. Gurkakoff?
1799
01:41:01,689 --> 01:41:03,589
Extremely enlightening.
1800
01:41:04,892 --> 01:41:07,690
- Potts, you were saying...
- Yes.
1801
01:41:07,762 --> 01:41:10,128
Now if I... May I stand?
1802
01:41:10,197 --> 01:41:13,894
- Sure, if it's gonna help.
- Thank you, it will a lot.
1803
01:41:13,968 --> 01:41:17,267
Now, if I may have your attention
for a few moments.
1804
01:41:17,338 --> 01:41:20,330
Gentlemen,
you see your inferiority is a question
1805
01:41:20,407 --> 01:41:22,637
of the bony structure of your skulls.
1806
01:41:22,710 --> 01:41:26,237
- What's the matter with our skulls?
- Now, just listen, please.
1807
01:41:26,313 --> 01:41:28,372
Let us take
the glandular syncopation of your eyes.
1808
01:41:28,449 --> 01:41:30,849
Kindly look at me, both of you.
It's very important.
1809
01:41:30,918 --> 01:41:33,614
They are the doliocephalic and
the brachiocephalic
1810
01:41:33,687 --> 01:41:35,985
with a somewhat
Mediterranean estrafuge.
1811
01:41:36,056 --> 01:41:37,785
Now try to follow me closely.
1812
01:41:37,858 --> 01:41:41,817
Now, the double smorgasbord
of your chins, for instance,
1813
01:41:41,896 --> 01:41:44,694
convexing into
the cataclysmic protoplasm...
1814
01:41:45,766 --> 01:41:47,358
Am I boring you?
1815
01:41:48,636 --> 01:41:52,504
- I don't get it.
- Now, the latest centrifugal research
1816
01:41:52,573 --> 01:41:56,509
as performed by
Bronxville scientists has proven
1817
01:41:56,577 --> 01:42:01,173
that syllogism is enigmatic to prolonged
resistance, especially in the cavalry.
1818
01:42:01,248 --> 01:42:04,217
Now take your ears.
The totalitarian mastoid
1819
01:42:04,285 --> 01:42:08,881
of their basic lobes prematurely
extricated from the paranoiac agriculture
1820
01:42:08,956 --> 01:42:11,447
- and molecular cadenzas...
- Get down to it.
1821
01:42:11,525 --> 01:42:14,289
- What's wrong with us?
- Nothing.
1822
01:42:15,996 --> 01:42:18,464
You're just fine. Everything's fine.
1823
01:42:18,532 --> 01:42:21,160
Now, on one hand
we have the sword of Damocles,
1824
01:42:21,235 --> 01:42:23,567
and on the other hand we have...
1825
01:42:24,405 --> 01:42:26,134
Professor Quintana,
would you look up something
1826
01:42:26,207 --> 01:42:27,765
in Tate's Oriental Philosophy for me?
1827
01:42:27,842 --> 01:42:30,834
- I think I saw it last on your desk.
- Yes, yes.
1828
01:42:31,745 --> 01:42:34,145
- Line one, chapter seven.
- Yes.
1829
01:42:34,215 --> 01:42:35,580
Do you mind?
1830
01:42:36,417 --> 01:42:38,942
Hey, this mixed-up talk
is giving me a headache.
1831
01:42:39,019 --> 01:42:42,079
All that book talk. That's a lot of mahaha.
1832
01:42:42,156 --> 01:42:44,317
I assure you this is not a lot of mahaha.
This is...
1833
01:42:44,391 --> 01:42:46,916
I'll show you
what makes the world go round.
1834
01:42:47,428 --> 01:42:49,919
Kind of spread out a little bit, will you?
1835
01:42:54,568 --> 01:42:57,731
- My globe! My globe!
- Me, I don't like globes.
1836
01:42:59,373 --> 01:43:00,635
Now me.
1837
01:43:05,112 --> 01:43:07,307
I saw me a picture last week.
1838
01:43:19,960 --> 01:43:21,951
There's gonna be a lot
of trash tomorrow, sister.
1839
01:43:22,029 --> 01:43:24,122
If there is any tomorrow, brother.
1840
01:43:41,315 --> 01:43:44,148
Ain't there some more of
them things around?
1841
01:43:44,218 --> 01:43:47,381
- Don't get up, please, just...
- Please.
1842
01:43:49,290 --> 01:43:51,417
What's the matter with all of you?
1843
01:43:51,759 --> 01:43:53,590
We thought...
1844
01:43:53,661 --> 01:43:55,788
- Young man.
- What do you want?
1845
01:43:55,863 --> 01:44:00,095
Do you think you could shoot this dime
1846
01:44:00,167 --> 01:44:03,796
if I held it between my fingers?
1847
01:44:05,139 --> 01:44:06,504
Why, sure.
1848
01:44:08,142 --> 01:44:09,541
I mean...
1849
01:44:09,610 --> 01:44:12,101
I mean from where you were sitting.
1850
01:44:17,017 --> 01:44:18,109
Okay.
1851
01:44:24,091 --> 01:44:25,888
All right, put it up.
1852
01:44:27,861 --> 01:44:31,991
- Perhaps we'd better use a quarter.
- Well, that's twice as easy.
1853
01:44:32,066 --> 01:44:33,533
I'm glad.
1854
01:44:43,210 --> 01:44:46,236
Or maybe even a 50-cent piece?
1855
01:44:48,215 --> 01:44:50,445
He's not as dumb as he looks.
1856
01:44:51,051 --> 01:44:53,383
Has anyone change for $1?
1857
01:44:53,754 --> 01:44:56,655
Never mind, never mind.
A quarter will do. Put it up.
1858
01:44:56,724 --> 01:44:59,955
- Oh, no, I can get change.
- Never mind, put it up.
1859
01:45:21,548 --> 01:45:22,708
I've got him!
1860
01:45:31,125 --> 01:45:33,559
- Hold him, hold him.
- I've got him.
1861
01:45:37,898 --> 01:45:41,061
New Jersey? That's an awful big order.
Whereabouts in Jersey?
1862
01:45:41,135 --> 01:45:44,298
You just keep on driving.
Further orders will be forthcoming.
1863
01:45:44,371 --> 01:45:46,805
I warned you, Miss Totten,
you should never have come along.
1864
01:45:46,874 --> 01:45:48,501
It may be very dangerous.
1865
01:45:48,575 --> 01:45:50,668
This is my encyclopedia,
and I am going to stick with it.
1866
01:45:50,744 --> 01:45:52,939
I've never had so much fun in my life.
1867
01:45:53,013 --> 01:45:54,947
How are they doing inside?
1868
01:45:55,015 --> 01:45:56,482
Are we ready?
1869
01:45:56,550 --> 01:45:58,984
- Shall we start the torture now?
- Just one moment.
1870
01:45:59,053 --> 01:46:01,681
First, we are going to give him
just one chance to talk.
1871
01:46:01,755 --> 01:46:03,586
Where is that ceremony taking place?
1872
01:46:03,657 --> 01:46:06,820
Listen, monkey, I've been given
the third degree by all kinds of cops.
1873
01:46:06,894 --> 01:46:08,987
- All over.
- But not by us.
1874
01:46:09,063 --> 01:46:11,691
You will see, I am an authority
on Chinese tortures.
1875
01:46:11,765 --> 01:46:13,733
That tickles!
1876
01:46:13,801 --> 01:46:16,463
- Are you ready, Dr. Gurkakoff?
- That's right.
1877
01:46:16,537 --> 01:46:19,597
- Now, between the 12th and 13th vertebra.
- No! No! No!
1878
01:46:20,674 --> 01:46:24,872
- Hold his head down.
- Hey, cut it out!
1879
01:46:24,945 --> 01:46:27,709
- Stop it, will you? Look out.
- No, no, no.
1880
01:46:30,484 --> 01:46:32,918
Will you cut it out? Stop it.
1881
01:46:33,253 --> 01:46:35,619
No! No!
1882
01:46:36,090 --> 01:46:37,421
Around and around.
1883
01:46:42,896 --> 01:46:46,491
All right, all right!
All right, I'll talk! I'll talk.
1884
01:46:46,567 --> 01:46:48,865
They're in Fulham, New Jersey.
1885
01:46:49,603 --> 01:46:53,437
- Fulham, New Jersey.
- Fulham, New Jersey.
1886
01:46:53,507 --> 01:46:56,965
Shortest route, Bloomfield, Pine Brook,
Mine Hills, Allamuchy.
1887
01:47:06,253 --> 01:47:07,743
And now repeat after me.
1888
01:47:07,821 --> 01:47:10,346
- I, Joseph Lilac.
- I, Joseph Lilac.
1889
01:47:10,424 --> 01:47:12,892
- Loud, please.
- I, Joseph Lilac...
1890
01:47:12,960 --> 01:47:14,154
Head of Murder Incorporated.
1891
01:47:14,228 --> 01:47:16,287
- Quiet.
- Take thee, Katherine O'Shea.
1892
01:47:16,363 --> 01:47:18,763
- Take thee, Katherine O'Shea...
- Who hates and despises you.
1893
01:47:18,832 --> 01:47:20,629
- Loathes you.
- To be my lawful wedded wife.
1894
01:47:20,701 --> 01:47:23,829
- To be my lawful wedded wife.
- For better or for worse.
1895
01:47:23,904 --> 01:47:26,031
- For better or for worse.
- For worse.
1896
01:47:26,106 --> 01:47:28,904
For richer or poorer,
in sickness and in health.
1897
01:47:28,976 --> 01:47:31,274
For richer or for poorer,
in sickness and in health...
1898
01:47:31,345 --> 01:47:32,744
- I'm sick right now.
- Cut it out.
1899
01:47:32,813 --> 01:47:34,713
- What?
- Never mind. Keep going.
1900
01:47:34,781 --> 01:47:36,612
- Huh?
- Keep going!
1901
01:47:36,683 --> 01:47:39,413
To love and to cherish
until death do us part.
1902
01:47:39,486 --> 01:47:40,919
They'll put you in the chair
and fry you like...
1903
01:47:42,055 --> 01:47:45,286
And now repeat after me.
I, Katherine O'Shea.
1904
01:47:46,226 --> 01:47:48,126
I said, repeat after me.
1905
01:47:48,195 --> 01:47:49,662
I, Katherine O'Shea.
1906
01:47:49,730 --> 01:47:51,527
Come on, come on, Sugie.
It's just a parade or something.
1907
01:47:51,598 --> 01:47:53,589
Is it? Just wait and see.
1908
01:47:59,506 --> 01:48:00,700
What is this?
1909
01:48:00,774 --> 01:48:03,902
I believe...
I think it is known as an upstick.
1910
01:48:03,977 --> 01:48:05,706
- A stickup.
- Put 'em up.
1911
01:48:05,779 --> 01:48:07,872
- Hold up your hands.
- Hold 'em up!
1912
01:48:14,621 --> 01:48:16,145
- Back door!
- Don't do that!
1913
01:48:16,223 --> 01:48:17,986
I didn't mean it.
1914
01:48:18,058 --> 01:48:22,017
Hold 'em up there. Hold 'em up!
I mean it! I mean it.
1915
01:48:22,095 --> 01:48:26,293
Come on, now.
Put 'em up. Put 'em up. I mean it.
1916
01:48:35,175 --> 01:48:37,234
Get his gun, get his gun.
1917
01:48:45,552 --> 01:48:47,986
All right, Joe. Put up your dukes.
1918
01:48:49,590 --> 01:48:51,080
Okay, Bertram.
1919
01:49:15,215 --> 01:49:16,876
Come on, Bertram.
1920
01:49:38,438 --> 01:49:41,339
This load of garbage
goes to the DA's office.
1921
01:49:42,776 --> 01:49:45,370
Something must have went wrong, boss.
1922
01:49:47,581 --> 01:49:51,950
Listen, you squirrelly cherubs,
you eight wise idiots, it wouldn't work.
1923
01:49:52,386 --> 01:49:54,650
Remember, Pottsy, no women aboard.
1924
01:49:54,721 --> 01:49:58,953
And now, above all women,
you want to take a dizzy dame like me.
1925
01:49:59,026 --> 01:50:02,723
If you'll allow me, I can prove to you
the inevitability of this step
1926
01:50:02,796 --> 01:50:05,424
- by higher mathematics.
- I can cite examples from history.
1927
01:50:05,499 --> 01:50:08,627
Or from geography,
two rivers converging irresistibly.
1928
01:50:08,702 --> 01:50:09,726
Yes, indeed.
1929
01:50:09,803 --> 01:50:11,361
I can prove it
by examples from literature.
1930
01:50:11,438 --> 01:50:13,030
Physiology.
By law.
1931
01:50:13,106 --> 01:50:15,074
- All of them.
- Gentlemen.
1932
01:50:15,542 --> 01:50:18,602
As a grammarian,
I know when words cease to be of use.
1933
01:50:18,679 --> 01:50:20,840
There remains one argument.
1934
01:50:22,849 --> 01:50:25,579
- Come here, dear.
- Oh, no, please, Pottsy.
1935
01:50:25,652 --> 01:50:27,916
- Get up, darling.
- But, Pottsy...
1936
01:50:27,988 --> 01:50:29,512
- It isn't fair.
- It isn't?
1937
01:50:29,589 --> 01:50:31,318
No. It is not fair.
1938
01:50:32,125 --> 01:50:35,891
Oh, my goodness, Bertram.
Remember the Anemone...
1939
01:50:35,916 --> 01:50:36,016
.
159018
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