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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074 api.OpenSubtitles.org is deprecated, please implement REST API from OpenSubtitles.com 2 00:01:38,731 --> 00:01:45,534 On the mountain top 3 00:01:49,209 --> 00:01:55,444 I see something black 4 00:02:01,821 --> 00:02:05,689 Is it cow shit 5 00:02:07,026 --> 00:02:12,362 Or my beloved 6 00:02:14,100 --> 00:02:16,091 Good evening, ladies and gentlemen... 7 00:02:16,202 --> 00:02:18,136 and welcome once again to The Crazy Daisy Show. 8 00:02:18,238 --> 00:02:21,366 We have sophisticated entertainment, a window into reality... 9 00:02:21,474 --> 00:02:23,840 a breath of cold air from another world. 10 00:02:23,943 --> 00:02:29,506 As the Chastity Belt Foundation and the Aristotlese Aplanalp chain stores... 11 00:02:29,616 --> 00:02:34,280 proudly present the semifinalists in the Miss World 1984 Contest! 12 00:02:34,387 --> 00:02:37,151 And now, ladies and gentlemen, it gives me a great deal of pleasure... 13 00:02:37,257 --> 00:02:40,021 to present Mrs. Martha Aplanalp, well-known philanthropist... 14 00:02:40,126 --> 00:02:42,594 and chairman of the Chastity Belt Foundation. 15 00:02:42,695 --> 00:02:46,153 A great sponsor and a great mother. 16 00:03:36,916 --> 00:03:41,376 Dear Mrs. Martha, first the question, why the Chastity Belt Foundation? 17 00:03:41,487 --> 00:03:44,422 Surely in these modern times that seems to be a bit old-fashioned. 18 00:03:44,524 --> 00:03:47,186 Oh, we're not old-fashioned - not in the least. 19 00:03:47,293 --> 00:03:51,593 At Chastity Belt, there are no metals... 20 00:03:51,698 --> 00:03:53,996 no elastic supports... 21 00:03:54,100 --> 00:03:56,000 no tranquilizers. 22 00:03:56,102 --> 00:03:58,832 Through the guidance of our sensational method... 23 00:03:58,938 --> 00:04:01,907 your own body kills the animal. 24 00:04:03,209 --> 00:04:06,406 We advocate simple triumph of the will. 25 00:04:06,512 --> 00:04:09,675 It is painless and ever so rewarding. 26 00:04:10,717 --> 00:04:12,742 No wild dreams. 27 00:04:12,852 --> 00:04:15,980 No - No peculiar behavior. 28 00:04:16,089 --> 00:04:19,149 Solid health and purposeful direction. 29 00:04:19,259 --> 00:04:22,820 It's so good to hear about health and purposeful direction in these sick times. 30 00:04:22,929 --> 00:04:27,332 Right on! Sock it to me, baby. 31 00:04:27,433 --> 00:04:32,894 A network of muscles forms the protective armor around the pelvic region. 32 00:04:33,006 --> 00:04:36,772 If not controlled and kept at bay... 33 00:04:36,876 --> 00:04:41,813 wild impulses will turn everyone into beastly animals... 34 00:04:41,914 --> 00:04:44,815 chaotic natural beings. 35 00:04:45,852 --> 00:04:50,289 Semifinalists from 77 countries have been selected and sent here this evening. 36 00:04:50,390 --> 00:04:52,551 They are, of course, the most desirable, prominent... 37 00:04:52,659 --> 00:04:54,889 and well-preserved virgins available. 38 00:04:55,928 --> 00:05:00,695 This year's stake for the lucky young winner is $50 billion. 39 00:05:00,800 --> 00:05:04,167 Fifty billion dollars, the estimated fortune of Mr. Aplanalp... 40 00:05:04,270 --> 00:05:08,536 uh, Mrs. Martha Aplanalp's boy, her pride and joy. 41 00:05:08,641 --> 00:05:11,007 The richest bachelor in the world... 42 00:05:11,110 --> 00:05:14,546 who decided suddenly this summer to give up his bachelorhood... 43 00:05:14,647 --> 00:05:17,741 to sponsor the Miss World Contest and marry the winner... 44 00:05:17,850 --> 00:05:20,216 the most cherished girl on the planet Earth. 45 00:05:20,320 --> 00:05:22,220 There's a saying in the Aplanalp family: 46 00:05:22,322 --> 00:05:27,453 "When we buy something, we buy the best, and we buy it brand-new." 47 00:05:27,560 --> 00:05:30,791 And now, ladies and gentlemen, Dr. Mittlefinger. 48 00:05:33,533 --> 00:05:35,433 Turn over here, Doctor. 49 00:05:35,535 --> 00:05:38,368 Yes, uh, Dr. Mittlefinger certainly is an extraordinary man. 50 00:05:38,471 --> 00:05:42,237 Um, has to his credit the delivery of three army generals... 51 00:05:42,342 --> 00:05:45,743 four members of Parliament, Eskimo sextuplets, uh... 52 00:05:45,845 --> 00:05:49,246 and, of course, many, many more people... and women. 53 00:05:49,349 --> 00:05:53,080 I, uh - I'm really thrilled to be able to perform at this important function... 54 00:05:53,186 --> 00:05:56,587 and, uh, I'm anticipating some delightful specimens. 55 00:05:56,689 --> 00:06:00,284 Each new flower brings a new joy, a new excitement. 56 00:06:00,393 --> 00:06:02,418 Can we start the show? 57 00:06:02,528 --> 00:06:05,725 Of course. Uh, so let's meet now the first contestant... 58 00:06:05,832 --> 00:06:08,096 Miss Southern Rhodesia. 59 00:06:12,004 --> 00:06:15,405 Another historical moment, a window into reality... 60 00:06:15,508 --> 00:06:17,772 an event never attempted live on television before... 61 00:06:17,877 --> 00:06:20,038 and coming to you on The Crazy Daisy Show. 62 00:06:20,146 --> 00:06:22,114 If you'll just step up here. 63 00:06:42,769 --> 00:06:45,203 Would you be good enough to remove your pants? 64 00:06:45,304 --> 00:06:47,204 Oh, my pleasure. 65 00:06:47,306 --> 00:06:49,206 - Dr. Mittlefinger- - So kind. 66 00:06:49,308 --> 00:06:54,837 Brilliant master of deep insights and even deeper insights. 67 00:06:54,947 --> 00:06:59,350 Innovative explorer of the abysses of the human body and soul. 68 00:06:59,452 --> 00:07:02,182 Tell us, Miss, uh, Southern Rhodesia. Tell us, how do you feel now? 69 00:07:02,288 --> 00:07:06,190 Oh, I'm great. Oh! 70 00:07:06,292 --> 00:07:08,283 What's happening? 71 00:07:08,394 --> 00:07:11,124 You're tickling me. 72 00:07:11,230 --> 00:07:14,757 I'm really sensitive. You're tickling me with your little light. 73 00:07:14,867 --> 00:07:17,131 This little light. 74 00:07:17,236 --> 00:07:20,296 Now, ladies and gentlemen, we proudly present Miss Congo. 75 00:07:37,990 --> 00:07:40,049 Remove your panties please, honey. 76 00:07:40,159 --> 00:07:42,150 Hey, baby. You mean my bananas? 77 00:07:42,261 --> 00:07:46,061 Oh, yes, of course. Delicious. 78 00:07:54,207 --> 00:07:57,233 There are different types of hymen, a delicate little piece of skin... 79 00:07:57,343 --> 00:08:02,280 that informs us about a girl's initiation into the world of adult pleasures. 80 00:08:04,383 --> 00:08:07,375 I mean the sinful, disgusting pleasures of the flesh... 81 00:08:07,487 --> 00:08:09,955 and unusual sensual... 82 00:08:10,056 --> 00:08:11,956 excitation. 83 00:08:18,197 --> 00:08:22,459 Now, here comes Miss Yugoslavia, a picture of radiant health. 84 00:08:30,643 --> 00:08:33,510 Yes, well, this young lady is certainly self-assured. 85 00:09:12,518 --> 00:09:14,850 Now, moving right along, folks... 86 00:09:14,954 --> 00:09:17,980 let's meet Mademoiselle Canada. 87 00:09:38,911 --> 00:09:40,879 Would you take your pants off, please? 88 00:09:40,980 --> 00:09:43,005 I don't wear any. 89 00:09:44,116 --> 00:09:46,209 You never wear any pants? 90 00:09:46,319 --> 00:09:48,787 Not for a special occasion like this. 91 00:09:56,562 --> 00:09:59,326 Splendid. Splendid. 92 00:09:59,432 --> 00:10:01,900 By far the most beautiful thing here. 93 00:10:03,970 --> 00:10:09,340 In all my years of practice, I've never seen anything so sweet. 94 00:10:10,576 --> 00:10:12,476 A rosebud. 95 00:10:48,714 --> 00:10:52,343 The whole world is our country 96 00:10:52,551 --> 00:10:55,748 Liberty is our law 97 00:10:55,955 --> 00:11:00,654 And just one thought... 98 00:11:00,760 --> 00:11:04,127 The whole world is our country 99 00:11:04,230 --> 00:11:07,393 Liberty is our law 100 00:11:07,500 --> 00:11:12,995 Just one thought burns in our hearts 101 00:11:13,372 --> 00:11:18,469 Wanderers on land 102 00:11:19,045 --> 00:11:23,505 And sea 103 00:11:24,250 --> 00:11:28,346 For an idea 104 00:11:28,688 --> 00:11:31,486 We leave our loved ones behind 105 00:11:31,590 --> 00:11:34,923 The whole world is our country 106 00:11:35,027 --> 00:11:37,894 Liberty is our law 107 00:11:37,997 --> 00:11:42,991 And just one thought... 108 00:11:43,102 --> 00:11:46,401 The whole world is our country 109 00:11:46,505 --> 00:11:49,633 Liberty is our law 110 00:11:49,742 --> 00:11:55,578 Just one thought burns in our hearts 111 00:11:55,681 --> 00:12:00,846 But all your exiled people 112 00:12:01,053 --> 00:12:05,888 Shall return to you 113 00:12:06,258 --> 00:12:11,423 And brandish the torch 114 00:12:11,630 --> 00:12:13,598 To demand their rights 115 00:12:13,699 --> 00:12:16,964 The whole world is our country 116 00:12:17,069 --> 00:12:20,334 Liberty is our law 117 00:12:20,439 --> 00:12:24,933 And just one thought... 118 00:12:25,044 --> 00:12:28,445 The whole world is our country 119 00:12:28,547 --> 00:12:31,778 Liberty is our law 120 00:12:31,884 --> 00:12:36,981 Just one thought burns in our hearts 121 00:12:42,995 --> 00:12:46,396 When I buy something, I always buy the best. 122 00:12:46,499 --> 00:12:50,299 You know, yesterday, I bought a diamond mine in South Africa. 123 00:12:50,402 --> 00:12:53,235 Today, another buy. 124 00:12:53,339 --> 00:12:55,807 The best-bred bride available. 125 00:12:59,044 --> 00:13:02,571 Must be about 785 diamonds in there. You know that? 126 00:13:02,681 --> 00:13:05,455 - About that? - Oh, yeah. Maybe more. 127 00:13:05,551 --> 00:13:07,542 And they all came from my diamond mine. 128 00:13:07,653 --> 00:13:10,554 Yeah! 129 00:13:10,656 --> 00:13:13,420 Yes, sir, baby. Here we go. 130 00:13:22,268 --> 00:13:24,236 Yeah. Hand-carved. 131 00:13:26,639 --> 00:13:28,607 - You know who this fella is? - No. 132 00:13:28,707 --> 00:13:31,107 That's Karl. Karl Marx! 133 00:13:31,210 --> 00:13:33,110 Yeah. 134 00:13:33,212 --> 00:13:36,670 He's the guy that shot the Russian Czar. Yeah. Shot him dead, right in the head. Yeah. 135 00:13:36,782 --> 00:13:39,580 That started World War I, honey. Yeah! 136 00:13:44,456 --> 00:13:47,186 I got it from a Russian business connection. Yeah. 137 00:13:47,293 --> 00:13:49,193 He buys a lot of my diamonds. 138 00:13:49,295 --> 00:13:51,786 - You see that little fountain down there? - Yes. 139 00:13:51,897 --> 00:13:53,797 That's my next buy. Yeah! 140 00:13:53,899 --> 00:13:57,562 It's gonna be my biggest undertaking in landscape architecture. 141 00:13:57,670 --> 00:13:59,831 I'm gonna buy it from the Canadian government. 142 00:14:00,873 --> 00:14:03,068 I'm gonna renovate it, redecorate it. 143 00:14:04,176 --> 00:14:07,339 Get rid of the water, turn off the falls. 144 00:14:07,446 --> 00:14:12,110 I'm gonna install an electronic, synthetic... 145 00:14:12,218 --> 00:14:14,311 laser moving image in livin' color. 146 00:14:14,420 --> 00:14:16,581 In livin' color, honey! Yeah. 147 00:14:16,689 --> 00:14:19,624 And we're gonna have a huge quadraphonic sound system. 148 00:14:19,725 --> 00:14:22,193 Yeah! Of the royal waters. Yeah! 149 00:14:23,362 --> 00:14:26,854 We're gonna have the best sight and sound system available. Yeah. 150 00:14:26,966 --> 00:14:30,367 Unaffected by weather conditions. 151 00:14:40,412 --> 00:14:42,744 My empire. 152 00:14:42,848 --> 00:14:45,180 Milk for the entire country. 153 00:15:46,278 --> 00:15:48,246 Let's see the bride. 154 00:15:48,347 --> 00:15:50,907 - Whoo! - Hey! 155 00:15:58,490 --> 00:16:01,618 Mama! 156 00:16:01,727 --> 00:16:03,695 Whoo! 157 00:16:08,834 --> 00:16:11,632 Now, you may ask, do I have time for marriage? 158 00:16:11,737 --> 00:16:17,107 And I simply state that marriage is a great gimmick for saving money and time... 159 00:16:17,209 --> 00:16:19,837 which is money! 160 00:16:19,945 --> 00:16:22,880 I have come to understand the real meaning of marriage. 161 00:16:22,982 --> 00:16:25,576 I simply can't afford any more waste. 162 00:16:25,684 --> 00:16:29,085 I can't afford any more chaos in my sex life. 163 00:16:29,188 --> 00:16:33,682 All right. Everyone has to relieve himself, but why waste it? 164 00:16:34,793 --> 00:16:38,729 Okay. You bang some broad, you feel good for a half a second... 165 00:16:38,831 --> 00:16:42,130 but then you realize you've gotta run to the phone to call your doctor... 166 00:16:42,234 --> 00:16:44,361 'cause you gotta have a V.D. test. 167 00:16:44,470 --> 00:16:46,870 You soothe your balls... 168 00:16:46,972 --> 00:16:48,872 and you get a headache. 169 00:16:48,974 --> 00:16:51,534 - That's right, my son. - Well, not for me no more. 170 00:16:51,643 --> 00:16:53,611 I guarantee that. 171 00:16:53,712 --> 00:16:58,411 My mama kept telling me, "Son, look after your health." 172 00:16:58,517 --> 00:17:02,317 Well, Ma, I sure as hell aim to. 173 00:17:02,421 --> 00:17:06,187 Come over here, honey. Best little heifer in town. In the world! 174 00:17:06,291 --> 00:17:09,488 No chemical substitutes. 175 00:17:09,595 --> 00:17:12,496 All ingredients checked and double-checked... 176 00:17:12,598 --> 00:17:14,862 and certified pure. 177 00:17:17,236 --> 00:17:21,002 Not an easy thing to find these days, is it? 178 00:17:21,106 --> 00:17:23,006 Well, I done it. 179 00:17:23,108 --> 00:17:26,134 So now I have acquired a lady of the house... 180 00:17:26,245 --> 00:17:28,372 a personal jewel... 181 00:17:28,480 --> 00:17:30,380 but above all... 182 00:17:30,482 --> 00:17:34,612 a purified sanitation system for unchecked waste. 183 00:18:49,595 --> 00:18:51,563 Hey! Hey! 184 00:21:49,308 --> 00:21:52,300 Hey, Mama! Yahoo! 185 00:21:54,479 --> 00:21:56,879 Hey, Mama! Yahoo! 186 00:22:34,953 --> 00:22:38,445 Is there life on the Earth 187 00:22:38,557 --> 00:22:41,321 Is there life after birth 188 00:22:41,426 --> 00:22:44,088 Is there life on the Earth 189 00:22:44,196 --> 00:22:49,566 Is there life after birth 190 00:22:51,870 --> 00:22:54,668 It's a joy to be alive 191 00:22:54,773 --> 00:22:58,231 It's good to be glad 192 00:22:58,343 --> 00:23:00,903 Good to survive 193 00:23:01,012 --> 00:23:06,780 It's great to be mad 194 00:23:06,885 --> 00:23:09,649 It's fun to have nothing 195 00:23:09,755 --> 00:23:12,349 Do things in the nude 196 00:23:12,457 --> 00:23:15,358 Oh, it's sweet to be hungry 197 00:23:15,460 --> 00:23:20,090 It's finger-licking good 198 00:23:20,198 --> 00:23:23,099 Is there life on the Earth 199 00:23:23,201 --> 00:23:25,829 Is there life after birth 200 00:23:25,937 --> 00:23:28,770 Is there life on the Earth 201 00:23:28,874 --> 00:23:31,206 Is there life after birth 202 00:23:31,309 --> 00:23:34,472 Is there life on the Earth 203 00:23:34,579 --> 00:23:37,275 Is there life after birth 204 00:23:37,382 --> 00:23:40,010 Is there life on the Earth 205 00:23:40,118 --> 00:23:44,953 Is there life after birth 206 00:23:47,492 --> 00:23:50,689 It's a joy to be crazy 207 00:23:50,796 --> 00:23:53,697 It's good to be sad 208 00:23:53,799 --> 00:23:55,960 It's good to be lazy 209 00:23:56,067 --> 00:24:00,697 Great to be bad 210 00:24:02,307 --> 00:24:05,037 It's good to be lucky 211 00:24:05,143 --> 00:24:08,135 Good to practice deadly sin 212 00:24:08,246 --> 00:24:10,737 To die for a cause 213 00:24:10,849 --> 00:24:15,513 To be alive and to win 214 00:24:15,620 --> 00:24:18,589 Is there life on the Earth 215 00:24:18,690 --> 00:24:21,523 Is there life after birth 216 00:24:21,626 --> 00:24:24,322 Is there life on the Earth 217 00:24:24,429 --> 00:24:27,227 Is there life after birth 218 00:24:27,332 --> 00:24:30,267 Is there life on the Earth 219 00:24:30,368 --> 00:24:33,098 Is there life after birth 220 00:24:33,205 --> 00:24:35,673 Is there life on the Earth 221 00:24:35,774 --> 00:24:41,007 Is there life after birth 222 00:25:00,665 --> 00:25:02,030 Hey, Potemkin! 223 00:25:02,234 --> 00:25:05,032 Aren't you from that famous revolution that failed? 224 00:25:06,137 --> 00:25:08,071 I mean the one in 1905. 225 00:25:09,975 --> 00:25:12,603 Captain, I am your new lover. 226 00:25:14,379 --> 00:25:16,404 The annunciation! 227 00:25:19,084 --> 00:25:20,676 I'm starving for love. 228 00:25:20,886 --> 00:25:22,615 I'm hungry for love. 229 00:25:23,588 --> 00:25:27,718 Those who starve know how to make love. 230 00:25:30,762 --> 00:25:33,492 They're charged with electricity. 231 00:25:35,200 --> 00:25:37,100 Where is this boat going? 232 00:25:37,369 --> 00:25:38,961 All the way. 233 00:25:41,439 --> 00:25:42,872 All the way? 234 00:25:44,676 --> 00:25:46,268 To the bottom. 235 00:25:54,419 --> 00:25:59,083 You need a good sailor on this boat. Come. I'll treat you well. 236 00:26:00,825 --> 00:26:03,385 What a joy to meet... 237 00:26:04,696 --> 00:26:06,493 an authentic... 238 00:26:07,532 --> 00:26:10,729 sexual proletarian! 239 00:26:16,207 --> 00:26:18,004 Beast! 240 00:26:38,296 --> 00:26:40,491 Fascination! 241 00:26:47,439 --> 00:26:49,304 Forward! 242 00:26:49,608 --> 00:26:52,076 Optimistic tragedy! 243 00:27:03,254 --> 00:27:05,916 Oh, sailor! 244 00:27:13,665 --> 00:27:16,828 Stick your sword in! You won't hurt her! 245 00:27:20,538 --> 00:27:23,803 "Man" - how proud that word sounds! 246 00:27:26,745 --> 00:27:31,239 Forward, people, to battle 247 00:27:31,583 --> 00:27:36,350 The red flag, the red flag 248 00:27:36,454 --> 00:27:41,255 Forward, people, to battle 249 00:27:41,359 --> 00:27:45,227 The red flag will triumph 250 00:27:45,964 --> 00:27:50,697 The red flag will triumph 251 00:27:50,802 --> 00:27:54,738 The red flag will triumph 252 00:27:54,839 --> 00:27:58,639 The red flag will triumph 253 00:27:58,743 --> 00:28:02,804 Long live communism and freedom 254 00:28:02,914 --> 00:28:06,042 Forward, people, to battle 255 00:28:06,151 --> 00:28:09,211 The red flag, the red flag 256 00:28:09,320 --> 00:28:12,118 Forward, people, to battle 257 00:28:12,223 --> 00:28:15,124 The red flag will triumph 258 00:28:15,226 --> 00:28:18,753 Forward, people, to battle 259 00:28:18,863 --> 00:28:22,526 The red flag, the red flag 260 00:28:22,634 --> 00:28:26,365 Forward, people, to battle 261 00:28:26,471 --> 00:28:29,963 The red flag will triumph 262 00:28:30,075 --> 00:28:33,476 The red flag will triumph 263 00:28:33,578 --> 00:28:36,672 The red flag will triumph 264 00:28:39,217 --> 00:28:41,276 I expected something else to happen. 265 00:28:41,386 --> 00:28:44,878 Nonsense. He can do anything. He's the most powerful millionaire in the world. 266 00:28:44,989 --> 00:28:49,289 Which means, quite simply, that for your own good, you better forget this marriage. 267 00:28:49,394 --> 00:28:51,658 Then I think I should get alimony. 268 00:28:51,763 --> 00:28:54,254 I advise you strongly... 269 00:28:54,365 --> 00:28:56,560 to refrain from thinking anything. 270 00:28:56,668 --> 00:29:01,401 Thinking sometimes can be a very dangerous exercise. 271 00:29:01,506 --> 00:29:03,633 Very dangerous indeed. 272 00:29:04,976 --> 00:29:07,410 Hmm. This is insane. 273 00:29:07,512 --> 00:29:09,412 Yes. 274 00:29:09,514 --> 00:29:13,075 Maybe we should ask for a psychiatric examination. 275 00:29:13,184 --> 00:29:17,484 There are people with similar symptoms. They become confused. 276 00:29:17,589 --> 00:29:23,221 They spend the rest of their lives behind the walls of asylums. 277 00:29:38,409 --> 00:29:41,207 - This house is mine! - Forget it! 278 00:29:46,184 --> 00:29:48,084 - Alimony! - Oh, yeah? 279 00:29:48,186 --> 00:29:50,154 Never! 280 00:29:56,961 --> 00:29:58,519 Be reasonable! 281 00:30:22,187 --> 00:30:24,485 Jeremiah. Jeremiah. 282 00:30:26,257 --> 00:30:28,691 Take care of her, Jeremiah. 283 00:30:41,472 --> 00:30:44,236 This is mine! This is mine! 284 00:30:44,342 --> 00:30:47,334 This is mine! Mine! 285 00:30:48,446 --> 00:30:51,244 Take care of her, Jeremiah. 286 00:30:51,349 --> 00:30:53,317 She's overtired. 287 00:30:54,686 --> 00:30:57,154 She doesn't feel very well. 288 00:30:57,255 --> 00:31:00,019 Poor girl. 289 00:32:11,129 --> 00:32:13,188 Where am I? Oh! 290 00:32:17,168 --> 00:32:20,331 Hitler! Dirty Jew. 291 00:32:20,438 --> 00:32:23,066 They call me Neanderthal. 292 00:32:25,777 --> 00:32:28,337 Fascist pig! 293 00:32:28,446 --> 00:32:30,914 I'm not just anybody. 294 00:32:31,950 --> 00:32:34,009 Dirty Commie. 295 00:32:34,118 --> 00:32:37,747 Why, they even wanted to put me on exhibit... 296 00:32:39,123 --> 00:32:41,557 in the Museum of Natural Sciences. 297 00:32:48,199 --> 00:32:51,259 My portrait is used in Szondy's test. 298 00:32:54,772 --> 00:32:57,605 I am listed in Krafft-Ebing. 299 00:32:57,709 --> 00:32:59,973 I am a certified psychopath. 300 00:33:00,078 --> 00:33:03,707 I am even quoted by Lombroso. And... 301 00:33:03,815 --> 00:33:06,807 my size is superhuman. 302 00:33:32,744 --> 00:33:35,474 - Afraid? - No. 303 00:33:35,580 --> 00:33:37,548 Hmm. 304 00:33:37,648 --> 00:33:39,707 I have my own advertising slogan: 305 00:33:39,817 --> 00:33:41,876 Try me. I'm delicious. 306 00:33:46,724 --> 00:33:48,885 See this chocolate complexion? 307 00:33:51,496 --> 00:33:53,464 Try it. 308 00:34:09,714 --> 00:34:12,114 It's sweet. 309 00:34:12,216 --> 00:34:14,582 Finger-licking good. 310 00:34:26,464 --> 00:34:28,955 Ooh. 311 00:34:30,301 --> 00:34:32,997 I'm Catholic, and it's a spiritual thing for me. 312 00:34:33,104 --> 00:34:35,595 I'm Muslim, and I have a real thing for you. 313 00:34:35,706 --> 00:34:38,470 Oh. 314 00:34:41,913 --> 00:34:44,780 Oh, you damned fool! 315 00:34:44,882 --> 00:34:47,942 This is my only property. This is my diamond mine. 316 00:34:52,890 --> 00:34:55,415 I'll do something to you that my father taught me. 317 00:35:28,326 --> 00:35:30,260 Are you happy? 318 00:35:38,503 --> 00:35:41,336 - Hello, sir. Where are you off to today? - Oh. Paris. 319 00:35:41,439 --> 00:35:43,930 May I have your ticket, please? Thank you. 320 00:35:45,676 --> 00:35:48,702 It weighs a ton. What have you got in there? 321 00:35:48,813 --> 00:35:50,872 Oh, books. Lots of them. 322 00:35:50,982 --> 00:35:55,282 Books weigh a lot. I'm taking a refresher course in philosophy. 323 00:35:55,386 --> 00:35:58,947 Marcuse, Supek, Vranicki, Sartre. 324 00:35:59,056 --> 00:36:03,220 - You know, i-i-it's heavy. - That would be 55 pounds overweight. 325 00:36:03,327 --> 00:36:05,887 Oh, I'll pay the difference. 326 00:36:05,997 --> 00:36:07,965 Thank you very much. 327 00:36:13,504 --> 00:36:15,472 Thank you. 328 00:37:19,070 --> 00:37:21,038 I have presents for you. 329 00:37:21,672 --> 00:37:23,503 A real Arabian carpet. 330 00:37:24,976 --> 00:37:26,500 You like it? 331 00:37:26,844 --> 00:37:28,505 Made in China. 332 00:37:31,249 --> 00:37:34,446 Vodka from Berkeley, California. 333 00:37:34,652 --> 00:37:36,051 For you. 334 00:37:36,254 --> 00:37:37,812 And my friend... 335 00:37:40,024 --> 00:37:41,514 Leonide. 336 00:37:47,498 --> 00:37:50,524 And my name is Luv Bakunin. 337 00:37:51,669 --> 00:37:54,297 Do you like my friend? 338 00:38:03,447 --> 00:38:05,415 Oh. 339 00:38:11,022 --> 00:38:13,081 Entrust your fate to no one! 340 00:38:13,424 --> 00:38:16,154 People! 341 00:38:16,260 --> 00:38:19,991 The policeman's boot crushes your desires and feelings. 342 00:38:20,431 --> 00:38:23,889 Let's be realistic and demand the impossible. 343 00:38:24,101 --> 00:38:26,092 A good bath, for instance. 344 00:38:26,304 --> 00:38:28,033 I haven't had one in four months. 345 00:38:30,141 --> 00:38:32,905 Let's be realistic, comrades 346 00:38:33,210 --> 00:38:36,873 And demand the impossible 347 00:38:37,081 --> 00:38:40,050 A hot bath, for instance 348 00:38:49,327 --> 00:38:50,624 Don't stay here. 349 00:38:50,828 --> 00:38:52,921 This boat is full of corpses. 350 00:38:53,631 --> 00:38:55,189 It doesn't matter. 351 00:38:55,466 --> 00:38:57,434 The whole world is full of corpses. 352 00:39:02,006 --> 00:39:05,772 IN THE KATYN FOREST 353 00:41:49,840 --> 00:41:53,833 Let's be realistic, comrades 354 00:41:54,044 --> 00:41:57,741 And demand the impossible 355 00:42:25,809 --> 00:42:29,074 Is there life on the Earth 356 00:42:29,179 --> 00:42:32,171 Is there life after birth 357 00:42:32,283 --> 00:42:34,911 Is there life on the Earth 358 00:42:35,019 --> 00:42:40,184 Is there life after birth 359 00:42:42,560 --> 00:42:45,552 It's a joy to be alive 360 00:42:45,663 --> 00:42:48,894 It's good to be glad 361 00:42:48,999 --> 00:42:51,467 Good to survive 362 00:42:51,569 --> 00:42:56,336 It's great to be mad 363 00:42:57,641 --> 00:43:00,371 It's fun to have nothing 364 00:43:00,477 --> 00:43:03,105 Do things in the nude 365 00:43:03,213 --> 00:43:06,148 Oh, it's sweet to be hungry 366 00:43:06,250 --> 00:43:10,277 It's finger-licking good 367 00:43:10,387 --> 00:43:13,686 Is there life on the Earth 368 00:43:13,791 --> 00:43:16,624 Is there life after birth 369 00:43:16,727 --> 00:43:19,821 Is there life on the Earth 370 00:43:19,930 --> 00:43:22,228 Is there life after birth 371 00:43:24,735 --> 00:43:27,169 The portrait. The portrait. Somebody. 372 00:43:27,271 --> 00:43:29,171 The portrait. Get the portrait in place. 373 00:43:44,455 --> 00:43:47,151 I want you to face the camera and look terribly Mexican... 374 00:43:47,257 --> 00:43:50,090 'cause I didn't fly you all over here to look like a French extra. 375 00:43:50,194 --> 00:43:52,321 And start to sing very nobly. 376 00:44:15,085 --> 00:44:19,522 To see this world of violence 377 00:44:20,157 --> 00:44:24,560 And so much suffering makes me high 378 00:44:25,963 --> 00:44:30,093 To live more fully I will die 379 00:44:30,834 --> 00:44:35,237 Such passion cries out for forgiveness 380 00:44:38,308 --> 00:44:43,336 River of blood, carnage 381 00:44:43,981 --> 00:44:46,313 I will shout 382 00:44:46,483 --> 00:44:49,611 "I want more!" 383 00:44:51,255 --> 00:44:55,589 Night of the sun, oh my heart, to celebrate the explosion 384 00:44:56,927 --> 00:45:00,829 With the motor of history driving me on 385 00:45:02,599 --> 00:45:08,401 I'm a wild stallion 386 00:45:08,572 --> 00:45:11,666 My golden mane flies in the wind 387 00:45:11,842 --> 00:45:14,402 As I seek out good times 388 00:45:15,179 --> 00:45:20,082 My valiant sword stands ever ready 389 00:45:20,184 --> 00:45:23,779 Cut! Cut! What's the matter, love, now? 390 00:45:23,887 --> 00:45:26,913 What's got into you? Don't you know we're working on a limited budget here? 391 00:45:27,024 --> 00:45:29,652 Don't you know I've got to be back in London by tomorrow night? 392 00:45:29,760 --> 00:45:32,524 Let's do it again, and this time, let's get it bloody right! 393 00:45:32,629 --> 00:45:34,995 Rewind. Rewind. 394 00:45:35,099 --> 00:45:37,124 - So, are you ready? - Ready. 395 00:45:39,603 --> 00:45:45,041 To see this world of violence 396 00:45:45,142 --> 00:45:50,170 And so much suffering makes me high 397 00:45:51,215 --> 00:45:55,481 To live more fully I will die 398 00:45:56,220 --> 00:46:00,623 Such passion cries out for forgiveness 399 00:46:03,694 --> 00:46:07,596 River of blood, carnage 400 00:46:09,032 --> 00:46:11,796 I will shout 401 00:46:11,902 --> 00:46:15,338 "I want more!" 402 00:46:16,507 --> 00:46:21,308 Night of the sun, oh my heart, to celebrate the explosion 403 00:46:22,346 --> 00:46:27,807 With the motor of history driving me on 404 00:46:27,918 --> 00:46:33,481 I'm a wild stallion 405 00:46:33,590 --> 00:46:36,684 My golden mane flies in the wind 406 00:46:36,794 --> 00:46:39,627 As I seek out good times 407 00:46:39,730 --> 00:46:43,996 My valiant sword stands ever ready 408 00:46:45,803 --> 00:46:50,365 This wild stallion cannot be tamed 409 00:46:51,375 --> 00:46:53,969 Stirring up passion wherever I go 410 00:46:54,178 --> 00:46:56,146 This is my song 411 00:46:58,882 --> 00:47:01,578 A thousand steeds will rise from my grave 412 00:47:04,421 --> 00:47:07,788 Untamed and unafraid 413 00:47:47,865 --> 00:47:49,856 You are so beautiful. 414 00:47:52,169 --> 00:47:54,603 I know. 415 00:48:14,591 --> 00:48:18,049 Your eyes are irresistible. 416 00:48:29,806 --> 00:48:32,707 I must see you tonight. 417 00:48:33,777 --> 00:48:35,972 See me now. 418 00:49:10,347 --> 00:49:12,315 Mmm. 419 00:50:06,203 --> 00:50:08,501 Let's get a picture of Sacr� Coeur! 420 00:50:08,705 --> 00:50:10,536 Stand right there! 421 00:50:11,575 --> 00:50:14,237 It's him! Master, we must have a picture. 422 00:50:14,344 --> 00:50:16,312 Oh! 423 00:50:16,413 --> 00:50:18,244 Oh. 424 00:50:18,348 --> 00:50:20,373 Ow. 425 00:50:27,891 --> 00:50:30,223 At last! At last! 426 00:50:30,327 --> 00:50:32,295 Instant cinema! 427 00:50:37,234 --> 00:50:39,202 Have you sent for the doctor? 428 00:50:45,008 --> 00:50:47,602 Where's my veal chop? 429 00:50:47,711 --> 00:50:49,975 Hello, maestro. 430 00:50:50,080 --> 00:50:54,346 I knew you were a hell of a lover, but this really knocks me out. 431 00:50:54,451 --> 00:50:56,351 And I am not easily surprised. 432 00:50:56,453 --> 00:50:59,251 Knocks me out too, se�or. 433 00:50:59,356 --> 00:51:01,620 It's a real love cramp. 434 00:51:02,259 --> 00:51:04,625 The man's organ is erect. 435 00:51:04,828 --> 00:51:07,991 The woman's love muscle closes tightly around it. 436 00:51:08,231 --> 00:51:11,064 Sometimes it tickles, but sometimes 437 00:51:11,268 --> 00:51:13,031 they get stuck. 438 00:51:13,236 --> 00:51:15,261 Happens to dogs too. 439 00:51:17,808 --> 00:51:20,504 - You're gonna cut it off? - Don't worry. Have no fear. 440 00:51:20,610 --> 00:51:22,874 - Latin lover. - S�. 441 00:51:29,152 --> 00:51:31,211 Hors d'oeuvres for table 12. 442 00:51:31,321 --> 00:51:34,119 Ah! 443 00:51:38,328 --> 00:51:41,820 Arriba! 444 00:51:58,081 --> 00:52:00,379 - Can I have an autograph, please? - S�. S�. 445 00:52:00,484 --> 00:52:03,419 Will you sing something for us, maestro, please? 446 00:52:03,520 --> 00:52:07,980 With the motor of history driving me on 447 00:52:10,093 --> 00:52:15,656 I'm a wild stallion 448 00:52:15,765 --> 00:52:18,359 My golden mane flies in the wind 449 00:52:18,468 --> 00:52:21,596 As I seek out good times 450 00:52:21,705 --> 00:52:25,732 My valiant sword stands ever ready 451 00:52:27,277 --> 00:52:32,943 This wild stallion cannot be tamed 452 00:52:33,049 --> 00:52:35,574 Stirring up passion wherever I go 453 00:52:35,685 --> 00:52:37,585 This is my song 454 00:52:40,657 --> 00:52:43,251 A thousand steeds will rise from my grave 455 00:52:46,329 --> 00:52:49,457 Untamed and unafraid 456 00:53:33,076 --> 00:53:35,044 When I left for Spain... 457 00:53:36,279 --> 00:53:37,940 in the war 458 00:53:38,415 --> 00:53:41,213 against all war and against fascism... 459 00:53:43,186 --> 00:53:45,177 my doctor said to me, 460 00:53:45,922 --> 00:53:47,651 "Comrade... 461 00:53:49,092 --> 00:53:50,616 don't go! 462 00:53:52,028 --> 00:53:53,495 You're too weak. 463 00:53:54,698 --> 00:53:56,689 You're so delicate." 464 00:54:00,103 --> 00:54:03,402 He said, "Life is so fragile. 465 00:54:05,375 --> 00:54:07,366 It must be protected." 466 00:54:09,412 --> 00:54:11,471 "From what?" I asked. 467 00:54:13,350 --> 00:54:15,944 "From water? Fire? 468 00:54:17,420 --> 00:54:18,944 Wind? 469 00:54:20,657 --> 00:54:22,591 Men? 470 00:54:25,996 --> 00:54:30,990 You can wipe your ass with your advice", I told him. 471 00:54:35,272 --> 00:54:37,240 I told my husband... 472 00:54:39,342 --> 00:54:42,334 "Freedom and communism start today." 473 00:54:45,782 --> 00:54:50,014 "Love starts today"... 474 00:54:53,089 --> 00:54:55,353 I told my lover. 475 00:54:58,995 --> 00:55:01,862 "We can't wage revolution with lies", 476 00:55:02,766 --> 00:55:05,963 I told the secretary of my party cell. 477 00:55:08,605 --> 00:55:11,233 I told my soldiers, 478 00:55:11,441 --> 00:55:15,605 "Our aim in this war isn't to die on the field of honor. 479 00:55:17,380 --> 00:55:20,872 Whoever falls and dies is a real schmuck, 480 00:55:21,084 --> 00:55:22,881 a total idiot!" 481 00:55:31,695 --> 00:55:33,754 Everyone has deserted me. 482 00:55:43,006 --> 00:55:48,569 Only a few old soldiers come visit me now and then. 483 00:55:54,351 --> 00:55:56,251 Don't stay here. 484 00:57:05,021 --> 00:57:06,955 Wow. 485 00:57:32,449 --> 00:57:34,849 My name is Anna Planeta. 486 01:02:09,459 --> 01:02:15,125 You can fuck me if you are lucky, Mr. Sugar. 487 01:02:52,535 --> 01:02:54,730 Three blind mice 488 01:02:54,837 --> 01:02:56,737 Three blind mice 489 01:02:56,839 --> 01:02:58,739 See how they run 490 01:02:58,841 --> 01:03:00,866 See how they run 491 01:03:00,977 --> 01:03:04,811 They all ran after the farmer's wife who cut off their tails with a carving knife 492 01:03:04,914 --> 01:03:08,509 Did you ever see such a thing in your life as three blind mice 493 01:03:08,618 --> 01:03:10,518 Three blind mice 494 01:03:11,621 --> 01:03:15,352 See how they run See how they run 495 01:03:15,458 --> 01:03:19,224 They all ran after the farmer's wife 496 01:08:49,158 --> 01:08:51,524 I'm building the head... 497 01:08:51,627 --> 01:08:53,527 of Immaculate Conception. 498 01:08:55,397 --> 01:08:59,197 Conceive your child in the brains... 499 01:08:59,301 --> 01:09:01,269 of a - 500 01:09:58,027 --> 01:10:02,293 Nice and flat so I can cut little slices. 501 01:10:02,498 --> 01:10:06,400 Can I cut it now? 502 01:10:06,602 --> 01:10:08,627 No one's answering. Shall I cut it? 503 01:10:10,573 --> 01:10:12,541 Oh! 504 01:10:16,245 --> 01:10:18,839 Delicious! Who wants a slice? 505 01:10:26,055 --> 01:10:28,148 Aaah! 506 01:13:26,802 --> 01:13:33,674 Is it cow shit 507 01:13:34,476 --> 01:13:39,175 Or my beloved 508 01:18:49,891 --> 01:18:51,859 Oh! Oh! 509 01:20:55,183 --> 01:20:57,674 Everyone I loved is dead. 510 01:21:27,983 --> 01:21:30,110 I feel good. 511 01:21:30,485 --> 01:21:32,919 It always starts out that way. 512 01:21:34,422 --> 01:21:36,447 It always starts out so well. 513 01:21:46,635 --> 01:21:48,728 Sugar everywhere. 514 01:21:51,106 --> 01:21:52,801 I don't believe it. 515 01:21:55,143 --> 01:21:57,737 This boat is full of sugar. 516 01:22:05,854 --> 01:22:07,651 Sugar is dangerous. 517 01:22:14,162 --> 01:22:15,891 Fine weather today. 518 01:22:16,998 --> 01:22:19,023 How can you say that? 519 01:22:33,581 --> 01:22:35,378 Sugar is dangerous. 520 01:22:40,155 --> 01:22:42,851 Makes you live dangerously. 521 01:23:02,744 --> 01:23:04,712 Are you afraid of the past? 522 01:23:11,486 --> 01:23:13,681 I brought all this sugar here, 523 01:23:14,155 --> 01:23:16,817 but the bitter taste still lingers. 524 01:23:19,294 --> 01:23:21,888 In any case, the traces can't be erased. 525 01:23:22,998 --> 01:23:25,159 What about the witnesses? 526 01:23:29,070 --> 01:23:30,901 The witnesses must disappear. 527 01:23:35,343 --> 01:23:38,073 Oh. 528 01:23:50,258 --> 01:23:52,522 Oh. 529 01:23:52,627 --> 01:23:54,254 That's good. 530 01:23:55,063 --> 01:23:56,462 Go on. 531 01:24:26,961 --> 01:24:29,191 No explanation? 532 01:24:32,600 --> 01:24:35,034 Not everything can be explained. 533 01:24:38,239 --> 01:24:42,972 I was so jealous when Vakulinchuk was killed. 534 01:25:25,420 --> 01:25:29,686 I was so jealous when Vakulinchuk was killed. 535 01:27:32,313 --> 01:27:34,838 My God, how sad you are! 536 01:27:36,718 --> 01:27:38,015 Is the tear ready? 537 01:28:38,146 --> 01:28:40,910 Anna! 538 01:29:53,621 --> 01:29:58,081 Darling, this is going to be the highlight of your career. 539 01:29:58,192 --> 01:30:01,628 From now on, when people eat chocolate- 540 01:30:01,729 --> 01:30:04,220 I mean the brand we advertise- 541 01:30:04,332 --> 01:30:06,300 they will not feel the same. 542 01:30:20,415 --> 01:30:24,317 I want them to feel as they're eating you. 543 01:30:24,652 --> 01:30:26,643 Action. 544 01:30:27,755 --> 01:30:30,189 Chocolat. 545 01:30:33,161 --> 01:30:36,221 Easy, easy. 546 01:30:39,133 --> 01:30:40,566 Perfect. 547 01:30:46,407 --> 01:30:48,637 Perfect. Very beautiful. 548 01:30:48,743 --> 01:30:50,904 - Okay. - Sensational! 549 01:30:51,012 --> 01:30:52,912 Okay. 550 01:33:34,809 --> 01:33:36,868 Mmm. Right. 551 01:33:36,978 --> 01:33:39,276 We're gonna sell the chocolate. 552 01:33:53,127 --> 01:33:55,357 Beautiful. 553 01:33:55,463 --> 01:33:57,431 Beautiful. 554 01:33:57,531 --> 01:34:00,227 Let everything be known... 555 01:34:00,334 --> 01:34:02,234 and let everything be clean. 556 01:34:20,321 --> 01:34:23,916 Our scouts had trouble in certain parts of the world. 557 01:34:24,025 --> 01:34:28,428 It's not easy to find a girl who's both pretty and a virgin. 558 01:34:28,529 --> 01:34:32,090 Our boys did quite a job, I'll tell you. 559 01:34:33,305 --> 01:35:33,190 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org41055

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