All language subtitles for The.politician.S01E01.WEB-DL.DDP5.1.x264-NTG.English-WWW.MY-SUBS.CO

WWW.MY-SUBS.COM

It was a waking dream,

the kind that arrives in the twilight
between sleep and the real world.

I sat straight up in
bed and said out loud,

"I'm going to be President
of the United States."

It does seem to be the hot job
everyone aspires to nowadays.

The air of impossibility
has been removed.

I had that dream when I was
seven years old, Dean Lawrence,

and I've spent my entire life
studying the lives of former presidents

to identify common
experiences and traits

that led to their inevitable
election victories.

Such as?

I only went back as far as Reagan.

As far as I'm concerned, he
created the modern presidency,

the presidency of
television and celebrity.

People like to think of their
presidents as characters they see on TV.

Most never actually
see them in real life.

Reagan and Bush Sr.

were both presidents of their
senior classes in high school.

Which, I assume, you are on
your way to accomplishing.

I believe I have the
election well in hand, yes.

Interestingly, Reagan, Clinton,
and Obama were all born into poverty

while the Bushes were both highborn.

How do you reconcile that
with your master plan?

Well, I have the good fortune
of being born both rich and poor.

Your family has generational wealth.

Yes, true, but I'm also the
only son of a cocktail waitress

from the Landing Strip Gentlemen's
Club in Laconia, New Hampshire.

- You're adopted.
- Yes.

Why Harvard, Payton?

Harvard's produced more presidents
than any other school. Seven.

Hmm. Well, I appreciate that.

You're clearly a very
well-prepared young man. Polished.

Thank you, Dean Lawrence.

But I'm not here to see the polish.

You're concerned about my GPA?

- Because I've...
- I don't care about your grades.

I want to know you.

The real you.

Have you ever been compelled
to go meet your birth mother?

No.

My real mother has always been

my greatest champion
and closest confidant.

When was the last time you cried?

I cried at the end of It's a
Wonderful Life last Christmas.

Everyone cries at the end of that movie.

I know.

Did you cry because you were moved

or because you felt like
you were supposed to?

Does it matter?

- Synced and corrected by chamallow -
- www.MY-SUBS.com -

You were great.

I've noticed... every time we have sex,

no matter what I do, you
seem to really enjoy it.

I don't know, I feel like, maybe,
sometimes, you're faking it.

I am.

Wh...

I don't like you pretending. I mean,

aren't we supposed to
be generating intimacy?

Sure, but we're also giving
you the self-confidence you need

to become the man I know you can be.

I know you watch porn.

Your brain is wired to enjoy
sex that's presentational.

Okay, but I don't want presentational.

I want authentic.

I will do better at appearing
more authentic from now on.

I don't want you to appear
authentic, I want you to be authentic.

I don't understand.
What's the difference?

I promise to be more real from now on.

- Where you going?
- I have a surf lesson.

We're going back to
Hawaii this Christmas

and I refuse to let
my dad call me Barney

and vanquish me to the ankle busters.

Let there be one place he doesn't
find me a complete disappointment.

Hey, he thinks you're great.

He thinks I'm pretty. And
he likes pretty things.

River!

- River!
- I'm in here.

You traitor. You
backstabbing son of a bitch.

You know how important this is to
me. How dare you run against me?

- Oh, I know. Listen, calm down...
- No. You calm down. I have the floor now.

Since when have you
wanted to be the president?

This wasn't even your idea, was it?

No, it was Astrid's idea.

She said I had to do it if I had a
shot of getting into Stanford and...

I had to do something to
get my parents off my back.

Screw you. Do you not
understand you're gonna beat me?

Okay? You're better looking than me.

You're more popular, co-captain
of the lacrosse team, so...

You're blowing this thing
way out of proportion.

The moment you win, I'll tell everyone

that we had sex and you're living a lie.

So, there's that.

- Payton.
- I'm warning you,

do not screw with my dream.

All right? I'm on a singular path. Okay?

You're not gonna get in the way, e

or I swear to God, I will make you pay.

Okay? So don't mess with me, River.

Are we clear?

I've never seen you like this.

I don't recognize this person.

Well, I don't care, okay?
I'm not a box, right?

I don't need to have four sides

for you to look at and approve of, okay?

I have... I have feelings, River.

These aren't feelings,
you're just hysterical.

Well, this is the true me.

This is who I am. I'm a winner.

I'mma win at all costs.

I know what my future's gonna
be and I know how to get there.

And I will not be stopped.

We have time for one more question each

before closing statements.

Payton, Mark Twain's classic
novel Huckleberry Finn

is part of this school's
freshman year English curriculum.

Do you believe racial epithets
should be removed from Huck Finn

before it is taught to students?

Hmm.

Well, first of all, thank you, Vicki,

for your years of service
as part of our yearbook club,

and thank you for what is a very
thoughtful and provocative question.

Now, this question doesn't
have an easy answer,

so all I can give you
is an honest answer.

No. We should not be rewriting
literary giants like Mark Twain.

Mark Twain loathed racial inequality,

and through the eyes
of Huckleberry Finn,

he was attempting to
shine a light on the...

the heinous, shameful sin of slavery,

and the systemic racism that
pervaded every aspect of his life

in the environment in
which he was raised.

But make no mistake, the racism
that Mark Twain wrote about

has not been banished to
the ash heap of history,

it's with us in this room today.

Right? It's different, to
be sure. It's... more subtle.

But we have a long way to go towards

true racial equality in this country,

and as student body president, I'll
ensure every student at this school

has an equal opportunity to succeed,

regardless of their color,
creed, national origin,

gender, sexual orientation,
genetic information, or disability.

If you choose to honor
me by electing me,

I will fight for each
and every one of you

so as long as there is
strength in me to fight.

So, give me your vote,

and help me lead this great
school into the future.

Thank you.

River, last question.

Uh, should the school be able to limit

the size of sugary drinks
sold at Saint Sebastian?

Um...

I mean...

Yeah? No?

Who cares?

No, sorry. I appreciate the
question, it's a good question.

I think it's important

that we make smart decisions
about the food we eat.

I just feel like,

it's hardly the most pressing thing
that any of us are dealing with.

- The world is dark, yeah?
- Oh, my.

And I think teenagers
nowadays realize that.

And... I don't know, it kind of
feels like the world's ending.

So, you know, if a 42-ounce
Mountain Dew makes you happy,

I say go for it.

I keep thinking that, uh, the
only thing we all share together

is that we're all alone.

And we take pictures, and we post them,

and we Facebook and Insta and
Tweet and Snap and everything and...

it just makes it worse.

Ah, man.

I tried to kill myself last year.

Yeah, I never... I
never told anyone that.

This is weird, I'm up
here, you guys... Can we...

Can I come down there and
talk to you? This is...

We're friends. We know each other

We don't have to do this.

- We can have a serious conversation.
- Okay, he's walking.

So, it was, uh, like,
about a year ago, and...

I don't know, I was just
feeling really depressed.

Not even depressed, just...
just hopeless, because, um...

because I felt so alone. And I, uh...

I was afraid I was always
gonna feel that way.

- He's crying. This is bad, this is bad.
- And, so I...

I went home after lax practice one
day and I was working out at home...

and something made me take
a 45-pound plate and, uh...

I tied it to my ankle

and I went out to my pool
and I jumped in the deep end.

And, for a second, I was really...

I was really ready to die.

And then I, like, realized. I was,
like, "River, what did you just do?"

And I panicked and I tried to get
the rope off my ankle and I couldn't.

And I just remember
looking up at the surface

of the water and thinking,
"No one's here, man.

You're gonna die alone."

And then, um...

next thing I remember I
was floating at the surface.

There's no cool ending to the story,

it's just the rope untied
itself from the weight.

I don't know, I never did Boy Scouts.

No one was there.

Oh, God, he's sweating like Nixon.

I don't want anyone here at this
school to ever feel like that.

It's really important to
me that all of you know

that your lives have value.

And that they're important.

That you're important.

That's all I got to say.

I love this guy.

Candidates, it's now time
for your closing statements.

I'll pick it up.

People lie, numbers don't. River's
ahead of you ten points post-debate.

And if you dig down
the tabs at the polls,

he is leading you in looks, charisma,

and, most importantly, authenticity.

Basically crushing
you in that department.

Especially after that masterclass
he put on during the debate.

Girls love it when a guy
who looks like that cries.

Not blubbery at all, more
of a silent, sexy cry.

Okay, fine, why don't all of
you just vote for him, then?

Our loyalty is with you, Payton.

This is a plane. We're all
headed to the same place.

You're the pilot, James
and I are your navigators.

Neither one of us knows
how to fly like you can.

We need you to get
us to the White House,

but we wouldn't be doing our job
if we weren't being honest with you.

If we don't tell it like
it is, we'll all crash.

Okay, what's my next move?

We need to get you a running
mate that softens you up.

Someone undeniably real.

I recommend a student
from the special ed class.

I believe the proper modern vernacular
for them is "differently abled."

So, you're going for the
sympathy vote, am I right?

What do you mean?

Well, it's not like
we're super good friends.

Been going to school
together for three years,

the most you and I have ever
said to each other is, "Hello."

So, you obviously have some
sort of strategy in mind.

The only strategy I'm interested in

is being a president for
every student at this school.

That includes people like you,

who traditionally have not been well
represented in student government.

What exactly does that
mean, "people like me"?

C'mon. I mean someone with a disability,

someone who might enjoy
sharing the spotlight for once

and having a hand in shaping
the culture at this school.

And "student body vice president"

looks pretty good on
a college application.

Oh, how thrilling.

What, so you are not
even gonna consider it?

Eat a fat one!

John McCain tried
that. It was a disaster.

Your family once hired Pinkertons
to bust up union organizers.

You have three lesser Picassos in
your housekeeper's room in your home.

Annie Leibovitz took your family
Christmas card photo last year

and you have a 4.3 GPA.

You're untouchable. You need a
running mate that can humanize you.

So, what kind of music do you like?

Britney Spears and Insane Clown Posse.

Yeah, me too.

If you had the chance to stand
up in front of the whole school,

and you could say anything
you wanted, what would you say?

I don't know.

Well, what would you want
to get off your chest?

Like, if you could change
one thing, what would it be?

Everyone should quit being a faker.

Alice? What do you think?

I love you. Unconditionally.

You are the front man
of my favorite rock band,

you are the star of my favorite
movie, you are my king of kings.

Nothing is going to stop you
from winning this election

and turning this school upside down.

But you've got to
listen to your advisors.

I'm just so happy to be alive.

I love when I can get
outside into the sunshine

and smell the ocean, you know?

Are you not eating lunch?

No. No, with the chemo I
don't always have an appetite.

My Nana says I have to eat,

but it's just the medicine I take,
it makes everything taste so spicy.

I'm so sorry to hear that. I...

I cannot imagine what that must be like.

High school is hard enough as it is.

I just don't look at it that way.

I think that every day is a gift.

And every time that I wake up,

even if I have to get a platelet
transfusion from Dr. Sengal,

I think to myself,

"A lot of kids around the world

don't have the same medical
care that I do. So...

If that's what I have to go
through, that's God's plan."

I'm looking for a VP candidate,

because I'm running for
student body president.

Yes, I heard. Andrea
told me. She's, um...

She said you were good at the debate.

She takes notes for me
when I can't be at school.

Mmm.

I wish I could've been there, but...

a lot of nice people
heard about my chemo

and they paid for me to go
to Disneyland with my Nana,

and we got to skip all the
lines and it was so much fun.

Best day ever!

What?

What are you...

I don't know. I just...

I really like you, Infinity.

You're so real.

We'd like a table for two, please.

- Sure, do you have a reservation?
- Yes. Jackson.

Dusty and Infinity Jackson.

I'm sorry. I don't see a
reservation under any of those names.

Well, that doesn't make any sense.
I mean, I know I definitely called.

Sorry. We're fully booked until 9:30.

Would you like to make
a reservation for then?

Karen, I want you to meet someone.

Infinity, say hello to Karen.

- Hello, Karen.
- Hi.

You were really looking forward to
eating here, weren't you, babydoll?

Uh-huh.

Hell, I said, "Let's go to Coco's."

I was so excited. I love me
some of that Coco's pot pie.

No, but you dug in. You said,
"I want Olive Garden, Nana."

I want Olive Garden, Nana. I do.

I just got my feeding tube
taken out, and my Nana said,

"Sure, yeah. You want endless
breadsticks, let's go for it."

Why don't you tell Karen
about your cancer? Hmm?

You're in pain sometimes, aren't you?

I'm sorry. I couldn't help overhear.

Uh, we're ahead of you,

but we'd really like
you to have our table.

- Oh, no. No, we couldn't poss...
- Please, I insist.

We'd also like to pay for your meal.

Oh, I...

I don't know what to
say. Thank you so much.

It's our pleasure.

You really ought to
be ashamed of yourself.

Bye.

Ooh!

It's blinking.

I can take your buzzer.

Right this way.

Thank you.

Enjoy your evening.

Thank you. You too.

It's so good.

Jesus H. Christ. It's like Rome.

I mean, all you can eat, and then
a quick trip to the vomitorium.

Dining out used to be
something you earned.

Well, like you have. But...

Don't eat that fast!

You're gonna yack it all up
like a baby bird. Spit it out.

Oh, Christ. Look at that. Jesus.

Don't forget, we have free tickets

to the Florida Georgia Line
concert on Friday night.

We're gonna be sitting
right up in front,

right in the handicap section,
right next to the stage.

- Free tickets. Wow, cool.
- Yeah.

So, how was school?

Okay. Payton asked me
to be his vice president.

Who's Payton?

He's a boy who's running for school
president and he asked me to...

Jesus Christ, he's
going to get more food.

Yeah.

What? He asked you to be what?

He asked me to be his running mate.

- Yeah?
- I don't really know. I mean, he's rich.

- He's really cute.
- Well, I hope you said yes.

I said no.

Why?

I don't know.

Sad.

I felt like he was using me,
and I don't like to be used.

You know what?

You're gonna finish your
endless bread basket right now.

And tomorrow, you are
gonna march up to that boy

and you are going to say,

"Thank you very much.
I accept your offer."

Something like this
could change your life.

Do you understand me?

You can be vice president.

Aim high.

Yeah.

You can get it all.

- Hi, Infinity.
- Hi. Jesus!

So, listen, I just was wondering

if you had thought any
more about my offer.

- I've thought about it.
- Mm-hmm.

The answer is no.

- Why?
- I don't need to tell you.

Payton!

We have a problem.

That's why I'm proud to
announce my running mate,

your next student body vice president,

Skye Leighton.

Thank you so much, River.

And, uh, thank you for giving
students at Saint Sebastian

the historic opportunity to elect

a gender non-conforming
African-American

to be their vice president.

Now, I can't promise that I'm
always gonna agree with you.

I have a reputation for
speaking my mind loudly

when I disagree with someone,

but I can promise you strength,
fortitude, and the passion

to make Saint Sebastian
an amazing place.

Thank you.

River!

Why are you doing this to me? Why
did you have to pick Skye Leighton?

Astrid said if I picked her,
I'd have my best shot at winning.

Why are you listening to her?

She doesn't want what's good
for you, she wants power.

You're the way she's gonna
get it. She's Lady Macbeth!

- You gotta calm down.
- She's jealous of us, can't you see that?

That is why she's trying
to take this away from me!

Why are you hurting me?

You... You have so much pain.

You don't need any of this.

You're gonna go to college
and join the Peace Corps.

This isn't gonna help you.

I'm sorry.

I really did love you.

No!

I wanna bag a Shiras moose.

I wanna bag a Siberian buffalo.

All right. I wanna bag...
Margaret Edmund Meyers.

- Maggie Meyers?
- Yes, Maggie Meyers.

- I already did.
- Really?

- Full bush.
- Dude, nice!

Firstly, it's illegal
to hunt Siberian bison.

Secondly, when you talk
about bagging things,

you sound like douchebags,
especially with your mother present.

You should totally come
hunting with us, Payton.

Yeah, that way we could
accidentally shoot you in the back.

That's enough!

Yo, that's good, Mom.

It's for a series I'm doing
to raise awareness and money

for the Syrian war debt.

This is Orhan. He was killed in
an airstrike earlier in the year.

Bummer.

Are you boys gonna be back for dinner?

No, we have that event in support
of eliminating net neutrality.

How can you be for
eliminating net neutrality?

This family holds 54 million
dollars in telecom stocks.

- He doesn't care, he's barely in the will.
- Boys!

Why are you always defending him?

Because you're bullies. And
you're borderline psychopaths.

Of course you're in
the will, same as them.

I saw to that.

Don't tell your father.

You know, I read this study

from Columbia.

It says that it's
impossible for a parent

to love an adopted child
as much as a biological one.

Parents are programmed to be drawn

to the children that
look most like them.

I would assume it has something
to do with protecting bloodlines.

Well, I would say that's a flawed
study, because I love you the most.

I always have.

You're just saying that because
they grew up to be such jerkwads.

You're not wrong about that.

You can't teach kindness.

You know? I tried for a long time.

Can't do much with small hearts.

Hard hearts, maybe, but not small ones.

I love them, don't
get me wrong, I just...

The love has edges.

It doesn't go on and on the
way my love for you does.

And you felt that way
about me right away?

Like you were a part of me.

It wasn't a meeting, it was a reunion.

This funny, dark, Jewish hair.
These big Disney eyes. And...

You were alone in the world.

And I suppose I felt
that way about myself.

Don't ever listen to your
brothers about who they say you are

or what you might do in this world.

There's my surprise!

Can I use your restroom?

Well, yes, of course. Just follow
the path up to the main house.

There's staff.

- You could've at least said hello.
- What is he doing here?

He's your new Mandarin tutor.

That's River Barkley, he's
incredibly popular at school.

So are you.

Not his kind of popular. And he's
dating my arch-nemesis, Astrid Sloan.

She called me a fag in second
grade. I'm not even gay.

Oh.

Well, he comes very highly recommended.

I suggest you make him like you

and have Astrid Sloan be very jealous.

Fine.

Every single one of these
books is an autobiography.

Lincoln, Ross Perot, US Grant.

I like to read about how
others achieved their greatness

so that I can mimic what worked.

You know, fake it till you make it.

What?

I fake it a lot too.

People think I'm... all calm.

I don't know if I really am.

It's sometimes like I'm...

feeling the whole
world at once, you know?

Uh, where did you learn Mandarin?

My dad works for Goldman, so we
lived in Shanghai until I was ten.

- "Bathroom"?
- Do you want to start?

- Oh, yeah, sure.
- Yeah.

Why are you so tense?

How do you know I'm tense?

I just do.

You don't seem very happy.

Are you happy?

I try to be.

I try to be too.

I really try.

It's so hard to have to
try so hard all the time.

Um...

Okay, that was weird.

Um, how did you get me to
be vulnerable like that?

I'm never like that.

I know.

It's just kinda a
thing I do with people.

Maybe it was just what you needed.

What do you need?

I don't know what that means.

Can I kiss you?

See you next time?

Excuse me. Languages?

- Third stack.
- Thank you.

I'm gonna dive right in.

I know what's going on
between you and River.

He told me what happened.

I was mad at first, but
then I admired his honesty.

River and I have complete transparency.

I've always known he was
fluid. I am too, sorta.

And if you're the way he deals with
that part of himself, that's fine.

But I want in too.

Come over to my house after school.

Let's all get it on.

Okay.

I don't know where the
gun came from. Um...

He just turned away for a moment

and then he had it in his
hand and then he shot himself.

Son, look at me.

I never heard a sound like that before.

I need you to focus and tell
me everything you remember.

What happened?

He killed himself.

He did this because of you.

- Miss?
- I have to see him.

- Sorry, you can't...
- I have to see him! I'm his girlfriend.

I'm his girlfriend!

I should be crying.

Why aren't I crying?

It's not you.

They told me when you were
born you didn't even cry.

You just came out and looked at
everyone with a furrowed brow.

I'm worried...

that I...

that I don't have the same
feelings everyone else does.

I think a lot of young people
feel that way, especially nowadays.

Your generation got the terrible idea

that it was best to vomit
every thought and feeling

all over each other.

It's a pandemic of overcommunication

that's led to an absence of intimacy.

It's more than that for me.

What if I'm just wired differently?

I mean, what if I can't
feel for anyone else?

They say that sociopaths can't do that.

What if all I'll ever able
to do is pretend to feel?

Does it matter if you
can't tell the difference?

I'm sorry about River.

He was a wonderful boy.

This is gonna sound awful,
but I'm just gonna say it.

Now that River's dead,
you're running unopposed.

- Seriously?
- I can't believe you just said that.

Sorry, but it's my job.

You know you don't have to do this.

I want to.

And while they ask that you
respect their privacy at this time,

River's family wishes to
express their gratitude

for the outpouring of support they
have received in the last few days.

It's trying times like these

where we, as a community,
look to our student leaders

for a way to move
forward and begin to heal.

Payton?

I didn't really get to
know River until last year.

He was my tutor.

Then he became my friend.

And then, my opponent.

We found ourselves running
against one another,

but River never made it
feel like a competition.

He would always say, "Don't
worry about it, Payton.

Let the best man win."

Now, the best man can't win.

Uh, River was very active
in the drama department,

so I've asked one of his many friends

to help me sing a song in his honor.

♪ It's coming on Christmas ♪
♪ They're cutting down trees ♪

♪ Putting up reindeer ♪
♪ Singing songs of joy and peace ♪

♪ Oh, I wish I had a river ♪

♪ I could skate away on ♪

♪ But it don't snow here ♪

♪ It stays pretty green ♪

♪ Gonna make a lot of money ♪
♪ Then I'm gonna quit this crazy scene ♪

♪ Oh, I wish I had a river ♪

♪ I could skate away on ♪

♪ Oh, I wish I had a river so long ♪

♪ I would teach my feet to fly ♪

♪ Oh, I wish I had a river ♪

♪ I could skate away on ♪

♪ I made my baby cry ♪

♪ He tried hard to help me ♪
♪ You know, he put me at ease ♪

♪ And he loved me so naughty ♪
♪ Made me weak in the knees ♪

♪ Oh, I wish I had a river ♪

♪ I could skate away on ♪

♪ Oh, I wish I had a river so long ♪

♪ I would teach my feet to fly ♪

♪ Oh, I wish I had a river ♪

♪ I could skate away on ♪

♪ I made my baby say goodbye ♪

♪ It's coming on Christmas ♪
♪ They're cutting down trees ♪

♪ They're putting up reindeer ♪
♪ And singing songs of joy and peace ♪

♪ Oh, I wish I had a river ♪

♪ I could skate away on ♪

River's girlfriend, Astrid,
has asked to say a few words.

Thank you, Payton, that was beautiful.

I'm sure River would've appreciated it.

You were right when you
said the best man can't win.

There was only one person
in this race up for the job.

And now he's gone.

That is why I've decided
to run in River's place.

My running mate will be Skye Leighton.

We will try to be the first all-female
ticket in this school's history.

If you believed in what River stood for,

good, because so did I.

And if you give me your vote,

then together, we can
keep River's memory alive.

Thank you.

You wanted to see me?

This came for you.

Open it.

Waitlisted.

Sweetheart.

A lifetime of focus and planning,

carefully studying applications
obtained on the black market

to pinpoint the exact combination
of extracurriculars and test scores

that would optimize my
chances at acceptance.

Three years on that stupid
literary magazine. Model UN.

And service-oriented
summer camp in Costa Rica.

Flippin' Mandarin!

- They haven't said no.
- This is worse. This is worse than no.

This is... This is, "Let's wait
and see if we find anybody better."

This is, "Even if we take
you, you're our second choice."

Why didn't... Why didn't they want me?

They took those morons.

Well, your father and
I bought their way in.

You were very clear. You said
you wanted to do this properly.

No, I can't get in that way.
People know it. It stays with you.

It's... It's handing your opponent
a negative ad on a platter.

Come here.

Don't litter.

Okay.

Waitlisted is not "no"
and you're going to get in.

You're the most exceptional
human being I've ever met.

Hold on. You must've gotten
your letter today too.

I'm sure that they have an algorithm

that demands they take so many women

and so many applicants
from this group or that.

Yes, I got in.

Alice, please, don't diminish your
accomplishments to soothe my ego.

You're gonna be valedictorian.

You have a gold medal in
fencing from the Junior Olympics.

You speak six languages.

No one deserves to go
to Harvard more than you.

And I am so happy for you.

Well, okay.

Tonight is about getting
you back on your feet 100%,

so you can win this election and
make this world a better place.

Thomas, please go set up your
table in the massage room.

You'll give Payton a treatment
as soon as we're done.

Reiki, cups, and acupuncture.

You're too good to be true.

I have a plan to help you win.

But first, I need to
ask you some questions,

and I need you to answer
me honestly, no judgment.

I swear.

Did you kill River?

I won't judge you or turn
you in. I just want to know.

While you didn't anticipate
Astrid jumping into the campaign,

you might have correctly thought

that River dying would be
your clearest path to victory.

I didn't kill him.

We need to break up.

- You said you wouldn't judge me!
- Not really break up.

We need to pretend to break up in
order for you to win the election.

Right now, you and Astrid are
splitting the sympathy vote.

I'm going to confess
that I cheated on you.

It'll be a scandal.

You will dump me and everyone
will feel sorry for you.

I've cleared with McAfee and James.

They think it could gain
you six to nine points,

depending on how magnanimous
you are about the whole thing.

But everyone will hate you.

I love you.

This... is what love looks like, Payton.

This is what sacrifice looks like.

This is what it takes
to change the world.

I am your first lady today...

and always.

- But there are rules.
- Rules?

We will break up

long enough for you to win

and for no one to suspect
duplicity on our parts.

You will post photos of Big Sur,

the truffle french fries at
Hoagies Diner on Route 14,

and cute dogs on your Instagram at
least once a day with captions like,

"Wish I was here", and
"Yummy", and "heart emoji".

When you do so, I will know
you were thinking of me.

A secret code. I love it.

And, most importantly,

when you pass me in the hall,
you will not pay me any mind.

But as soon as we're past each
other, you will turn and look back.

I need you to do this for me
or I won't be able to survive.

Do you agree to these terms?

You are the best thing
that will ever happen to me.

Yes.

I agree.

Let's move on to fish course.

I don't want to say "I'm
overwhelmed with shame."

- That's too calculating, it sounds fake.
- It is fake.

No.

"I broke up with Payton tonight.

I guess you could say I cheated on him,

though it's more complicated than that.

I will not name the other
party involved at this time

out of respect to their family. Period."

That's good. Mysterious.
Really makes you lean in.

Post it.

This is good.

Jesus, people are freakin'
animals. These comments are brutal.

This is really good.

- Hi.
- Hi.

I didn't like doing that.

I know.

It's the right thing to do.

Hey, Payton. We're ready
when you are, buddy.

Okay.

Payton.

Hey, kiddo.

Look, I know you've been
struggling with Mandarin

and River was tutoring you.

You must be going
through a lot right now.

Yeah, I am.

Just show up for the exams,
and I'll give you an A.

Okay?

Thank you.

Okay.

Hey, man, I'm really sorry.

Numbers look great. Genius.
Wish I'd thought of it.

Go to the cafeteria
and press some flesh.

Well, I can imagine.

Well, well, well. Oh.

Look who's home.

Ms. Fancypants, shut the door.

Yes, ma'am.

- Sit down.
- Yes, ma'am.

This lovely young man was telling me

that you turned him down again

as a running mate in
the school election.

That is twice now
that you have defied me

and I would like an explanation.

I just don't want all that attention.

Oh, don't you lie to me.

You were the one who begged me
to call the Channel 13 news team

so you could get a
free trip to Legoland.

And the second those cameras turned on,

well, you just about peed your
pants, you were so excited.

You know, actually, Ms.
Jackson, uh, Infinity, I have...

I've seen all the local news
stories on you and they are...

Oh, God, they're so inspiring.

But I really think that this
could be something even bigger.

I think this could be
a national news story.

Infinity, you could become
the voice of a generation

of handicapable children.

You know, at the risk of sounding
vulgar, it's worth remembering

that you could parlay something like
that into serious, regular income

just off of Instagram alone.

Wait a minute.

- We could make some money on this?
- Absolutely. Oh, absolutely.

Oh!

Well, hot damn!

If it would be at all helpful,

I'd be happy to provide
you with a cash loan

that could be used for anything.

Paying off medical
bills, buying a new car.

Wait a minute. A new car?

- Anything.
- I like the sound of that.

You know, I must say, I
like the sound of your voice.

Really? Yeah?

Yeah, I really... It's got
a real melodic tone to it.

Is that... Are you from the South?

Well, I am a country girl.

I knew it. I knew it.

- West-goddamn-Virginia.
- Of course.

Yeah, I drove all the way to
California from Martinsville.

You ever heard of Martinsville?

I don't think I have.

- Stop it. Stop it. Just stop it!
- What?!

I know what he's doing.

I know what you're doing.

Payton, you're trying to seduce us.

You're using your
money and your interest

and you're throwing it
around like it's nothing.

Hey, you are being a rude little toad.

He's a fake, Nana. He's a fake. I
don't trust anything that he says.

I'm so sorry.

- I really do apologize, dear.
- No, no, no.

- I am so sorry.
- Uh, no, no, she's right.

She's right.

River died and... my
girlfriend broke up with me

and I don't think that
I've processed any of it.

Um, I just keep acting
like everything is normal.

I just keep going through the motions,

like nothing happened, but
it did, I know that it did.

I know it did, and I still, I can't...

I can't feel anything.

You're right, Infinity. You're right.

I'm a fake.

You shouldn't believe anything I say,

because I don't know
that I believe it either.

I think that's why I want
you for a running mate.

You're authentic and you're real,

and I can't even face
the truth because...

because the truth is...

... the truth is that I loved him.

Oh, my God. I loved him so much.

And now he's gone.

Oh...

I'm so sorry, Payton.

I believe you now.

Hey, I believe you.

Okay?

I'm sorry. Hey...

We got her.

Because that's what life's all about.

It's not about avoiding adversity,

it's how we handle the hard times

when they come barging into our lives,

destroying everything we hold dear.

And that's why I've got someone
very special with me today.

Now, this is a girl that
we've all met, but...

she's someone that I don't
think a lot of us really know.

And I think that the reason
that I find her so inspiring

is because... I look at my life,

and what's happened in the past
few weeks, even the past few hours,

does not even compare

to the struggles that this
young woman has to face

every moment of every day.

And yet, she looks at the future...

with hope and optimism

and a sense of humor.

Infinity, you inspire me.

That is why I'm proud to introduce
you as my running mate today.

Ladies and gentleman, the next
vice president of Saint Sebastian,

Infinity Jackson!

Thank you. Oh, my God, that was so nice.

How about this one, huh? Let's hear it.

Thank you, my gosh, thank you. Uh...

I guess Payton's right.

My life hasn't always been easy,
but my Nana... my Nana always says,

"Infinity Maybelline Jackson... "

Congrats on the musical,
by the way. Nice to see you.

Hey, looking good, guys.
Thanks for being here.

"... a lot worse than
you." And she's right.

- She already has an 80% approval rating.
- And a fan account on Instagram.

I'm one of the lucky ones.

Sit back and enjoy the show.

But I'm counting my blessings today.

We're all lucky, aren't we?

- Hey, Andrew.
- Eric.

Right, Eric, sorry.

You douchebag, my name is Andrew.

I'm here, I'm alive, I'm with
all of you beautiful people.

I was coming to find you.

I'm really sorry. I want you
to know this was a really...

She's scamming everyone,
you know that, right?

- What? Who?
- Infinity.

It's all a big scam. She's not sick.

Thank you, Payton.

Thank you, Saint Sebastian.

She's faking it.

I...

I'm gonna work my butt off for you guys.

I mean, like, let's just get
out there and win this thing!

Yeah!

- Synced and corrected by chamallow -
- www.MY-SUBS.com -