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1
00:00:01,301 --> 00:00:03,535
Chester, you're not even dressed.
2
00:00:03,536 --> 00:00:05,771
- The reservation is in 15 minutes.
- Shh!
3
00:00:05,772 --> 00:00:06,805
He's back.
4
00:00:06,806 --> 00:00:08,941
Every night, at exactly 8:00 p. m...
5
00:00:08,942 --> 00:00:13,208
the well-dressed blond man appears.
6
00:00:13,280 --> 00:00:15,214
Chuck and Joanne are going to be waiting.
7
00:00:15,215 --> 00:00:17,816
You don't understand.
Every night, he does this.
8
00:00:17,817 --> 00:00:20,581
Every single night.
9
00:00:20,654 --> 00:00:22,855
He steps out of his building...
10
00:00:22,856 --> 00:00:25,557
walks exactly seven paces, stops...
11
00:00:25,558 --> 00:00:28,058
and smiles.
12
00:00:39,739 --> 00:00:42,041
Honey, I'm worried about you.
13
00:00:42,042 --> 00:00:43,676
Is he trying to communicate with someone?
14
00:00:43,677 --> 00:00:47,346
Is he trying to communicate with me?
Why is he doing this?
15
00:00:47,347 --> 00:00:51,350
But aside from not being able to fart
in the apartment, how's living with Quinn?
16
00:00:51,351 --> 00:00:53,052
Oh, it's great.
17
00:00:53,053 --> 00:00:55,553
## [Upbeat Pop]
18
00:00:57,157 --> 00:00:59,657
## [Man Vocalizing]
19
00:01:03,697 --> 00:01:06,197
## [Ends]
20
00:01:06,199 --> 00:01:08,500
Yeah, living with Quinn is great.
21
00:01:08,501 --> 00:01:11,629
Great, great, great. Great.
22
00:01:11,705 --> 00:01:14,006
- So how bad is it?
- Pretty bad.
23
00:01:14,007 --> 00:01:16,909
Last night,
I had just come back from my 8:00 fart.
24
00:01:16,910 --> 00:01:18,344
- Sure.
- Go on.
25
00:01:18,345 --> 00:01:20,279
Still no mail.
26
00:01:20,280 --> 00:01:22,281
I think they only deliver it once a day.
27
00:01:22,282 --> 00:01:25,918
Hey, listen, when I moved in here,
I sold all my stuff...
28
00:01:25,919 --> 00:01:27,820
because I know you like your place as is...
29
00:01:27,821 --> 00:01:29,355
and I was totally fine with that.
30
00:01:29,356 --> 00:01:31,190
Just one little thing.
31
00:01:31,191 --> 00:01:34,493
Would it be okay if instead
of using your coffee mugs...
32
00:01:34,494 --> 00:01:35,561
we use mine?
33
00:01:35,562 --> 00:01:38,463
Hmm.
34
00:01:38,531 --> 00:01:40,299
No.
35
00:01:40,300 --> 00:01:43,268
Barney, she got rid of all of her stuff for you.
36
00:01:43,269 --> 00:01:45,337
Oh, I see what this is really about.
37
00:01:45,338 --> 00:01:47,639
Yeah, mugs.
38
00:01:47,640 --> 00:01:50,140
Coffee? Tea?
39
00:01:50,210 --> 00:01:52,378
All right. Religion.
40
00:01:52,379 --> 00:01:57,182
This is about the fact that you don't think
this relationship is gonna last.
41
00:01:57,183 --> 00:01:59,785
That's why you don't want
to throw anything out.
42
00:01:59,786 --> 00:02:04,223
Because when that inevitable breakup comes,
you don't want to buy new mugs.
43
00:02:04,224 --> 00:02:06,592
That's why I've never thrown anything out...
44
00:02:06,593 --> 00:02:08,927
for any relationship ever.
45
00:02:08,928 --> 00:02:10,929
Isn't that right, honey?
46
00:02:10,930 --> 00:02:13,570
Oh, that's right, I'm alone.
47
00:02:13,633 --> 00:02:15,801
Lily, here's the thing.
48
00:02:15,802 --> 00:02:17,236
It's my apartment...
49
00:02:17,237 --> 00:02:20,406
and I need to assert my dominance as a man.
50
00:02:20,407 --> 00:02:23,137
Don't... ever say that...
51
00:02:23,209 --> 00:02:25,709
to any girl ever.
52
00:02:26,479 --> 00:02:27,913
Too late.
53
00:02:27,914 --> 00:02:29,581
What did you just say to me?
54
00:02:29,582 --> 00:02:31,417
She gave up her apartment for you.
55
00:02:31,418 --> 00:02:32,851
You know what?
56
00:02:32,852 --> 00:02:35,621
I don't have to sit here
and take this from you ladies.
57
00:02:35,622 --> 00:02:37,423
I'm goin' to Ted's...
58
00:02:37,424 --> 00:02:38,657
the man cave...
59
00:02:38,658 --> 00:02:40,492
where guys can be guys.
60
00:02:40,493 --> 00:02:42,895
- Assert your dominance as a man?
- You have no respect for women.
61
00:02:42,896 --> 00:02:45,230
- You have a mother.
- You guys too?
62
00:02:45,231 --> 00:02:48,000
I'm goin' to the "Y" for a shvitz.
63
00:02:48,001 --> 00:02:51,437
No, dude, hold on.
You're not goin' anywhere.
64
00:02:51,438 --> 00:02:54,566
- It's trilogy time.
- [Gasps]
65
00:02:54,641 --> 00:02:57,309
[Ted Narrating]
Kids, here's the deal with trilogy time.
66
00:02:57,310 --> 00:03:01,113
It all started a long time ago
in a dorm room far, far away.
67
00:03:01,114 --> 00:03:03,115
Dude, if we fail this econ final...
68
00:03:03,116 --> 00:03:05,184
for the rest of our lives,
we're not gonna be able to-
69
00:03:05,185 --> 00:03:07,019
We won't know how to-
70
00:03:07,020 --> 00:03:08,821
Do you even know what econ is?
71
00:03:08,822 --> 00:03:10,522
No idea. We're screwed.
72
00:03:10,523 --> 00:03:14,560
There's only one thing left to do
at a time like this-
73
00:03:14,561 --> 00:03:16,495
watch the entire Star Wars trilogy
all the way through...
74
00:03:16,496 --> 00:03:18,464
because I haven't done that
in, like, five years.
75
00:03:18,465 --> 00:03:20,265
Dude, you can't let that happen.
76
00:03:20,266 --> 00:03:23,869
If you're not "tril-ing" it at least once
every three years, the Dark Side wins.
77
00:03:23,870 --> 00:03:25,637
Okay, let's make a pact.
78
00:03:25,638 --> 00:03:27,506
No matter what, every three years...
79
00:03:27,507 --> 00:03:29,541
we sit down and "tril" it up big time.
80
00:03:29,542 --> 00:03:31,076
Agreed?
81
00:03:31,077 --> 00:03:33,011
A- Greedo.
82
00:03:33,012 --> 00:03:35,447
Wow.
83
00:03:35,448 --> 00:03:37,449
2003?
84
00:03:37,450 --> 00:03:39,950
What's that gonna be like?
85
00:03:44,057 --> 00:03:46,992
Hey, Ted. Sweet hair.
86
00:03:47,060 --> 00:03:51,196
I told you it would eventually stop
growing out and start growing down.
87
00:03:51,197 --> 00:03:55,234
Anyway, I'm just working on designing
yet another skyscraper.
88
00:03:55,235 --> 00:03:59,905
And I'm carrying this briefcase
because now I'm a successful lawyer.
89
00:03:59,906 --> 00:04:03,175
I like that. Can I make one adjustment?
90
00:04:03,176 --> 00:04:05,676
With a cool mustache.
91
00:04:05,712 --> 00:04:07,179
Nice.
92
00:04:07,180 --> 00:04:10,048
And who knows?
By then, you and Lily might be engaged.
93
00:04:10,049 --> 00:04:14,419
Engaged?
Bro, I'm gonna do way better than that.
94
00:04:14,420 --> 00:04:17,787
Ah, being pregnant is so much fun.
95
00:04:17,857 --> 00:04:20,025
I want to do this four more times.
96
00:04:20,026 --> 00:04:23,428
Oh, baby, how do you feel after spending
all day working on your art?
97
00:04:23,429 --> 00:04:26,365
Since I make enough
to support us both financially.
98
00:04:26,366 --> 00:04:28,433
Horny.
99
00:04:28,434 --> 00:04:31,470
I hope we don't bother you, Ted, because
even though we're married and pregnant...
100
00:04:31,471 --> 00:04:37,001
it still makes sense that we all share
adult-size bunk beds.
101
00:04:37,310 --> 00:04:40,404
So... Star Wars?
102
00:04:40,480 --> 00:04:43,415
Sure. I don't have to be at work
until late afternoon-ish...
103
00:04:43,416 --> 00:04:47,386
because my boss appreciates
that I like to stay up late drinking...
104
00:04:47,387 --> 00:04:50,879
and... rocking out with our band.
105
00:04:50,957 --> 00:04:53,657
Did someone say "rockin' out"?
106
00:04:53,660 --> 00:04:56,160
## [Funk]
107
00:04:57,597 --> 00:05:00,097
Whoa. Who's the babe?
108
00:05:00,133 --> 00:05:02,167
That's the best part.
109
00:05:02,168 --> 00:05:04,903
Guys, you remember my awesome girlfriend...
110
00:05:04,904 --> 00:05:07,306
- who was a virgin until we met?
- Mmm.
111
00:05:07,307 --> 00:05:09,675
My name's Rhiannon,
like the Stevie Nicks song.
112
00:05:09,676 --> 00:05:13,412
I'm hot, but in a crunchy,
earthy kind of way.
113
00:05:13,413 --> 00:05:16,114
[British Accent]
Oh, and I'm from England.
114
00:05:16,115 --> 00:05:18,417
Nice. Okay, Star Wars time.
115
00:05:18,418 --> 00:05:21,683
But first... we jam.
116
00:05:21,754 --> 00:05:25,224
Good thing I spent the last three years
learning to wail on guitar.
117
00:05:25,225 --> 00:05:27,725
## [Rock]
118
00:05:30,263 --> 00:05:31,663
Babe.
119
00:05:31,664 --> 00:05:32,664
Yep.
120
00:05:32,665 --> 00:05:34,666
Our band is gonna be in demand.
121
00:05:34,667 --> 00:05:37,536
And luckily, there'll be plenty of supply.
122
00:05:37,537 --> 00:05:40,037
Supply? Demand?
123
00:05:40,106 --> 00:05:43,108
Dude, do you realize what we just did?
124
00:05:43,109 --> 00:05:45,077
We used econ.
125
00:05:45,078 --> 00:05:47,588
We're gonna ace this final.
126
00:05:48,448 --> 00:05:50,449
[Ted Narrating]
We both got zeros.
127
00:05:50,450 --> 00:05:55,046
Oh, dude, 2003 is gonna be awesome.
128
00:06:00,526 --> 00:06:03,026
## [Plunking, Off-key]
129
00:06:04,297 --> 00:06:05,464
"Satisfaction"?
130
00:06:05,465 --> 00:06:07,165
"Hot Cross Buns."
131
00:06:07,166 --> 00:06:09,034
Well, keep it up, bro.
132
00:06:09,035 --> 00:06:11,103
So, you ready to watch the trilogy?
133
00:06:11,104 --> 00:06:13,405
Oh, I don't know.
134
00:06:13,406 --> 00:06:17,042
I really thought that by now I'd be a lawyer
with a kick-ass mustache.
135
00:06:17,043 --> 00:06:19,678
But I still haven't
gotten into law school...
136
00:06:19,679 --> 00:06:22,614
and my facial hair just grows in patchy.
137
00:06:22,615 --> 00:06:25,115
Just red and patchy.
138
00:06:25,918 --> 00:06:28,053
Come on, your life's not that bad.
139
00:06:28,054 --> 00:06:29,721
Dude, I manage a Structure.
140
00:06:29,722 --> 00:06:32,658
Yeah, but you get 10% off vests.
I mean, that's something.
141
00:06:32,659 --> 00:06:35,394
The vests are pretty sweet,
but, look, Lily and I aren't married...
142
00:06:35,395 --> 00:06:37,162
and we don't have a baby on the way.
143
00:06:37,163 --> 00:06:40,932
- But we did get the cool apartment.
- That we can barely afford.
144
00:06:40,933 --> 00:06:44,269
I mean, I don't see any way
that our lives are better now
than they were three years ago.
145
00:06:44,270 --> 00:06:46,605
[Barney] Oh, really, Marshall?
Nothing comes to mind?
146
00:06:46,606 --> 00:06:48,607
By the way, guys, this is Lisa.
147
00:06:48,608 --> 00:06:51,988
You'll be seeing a lot more of Lisa.
148
00:06:53,279 --> 00:06:55,614
And they never saw her again.
149
00:06:55,615 --> 00:06:58,115
Whazzup?
150
00:06:58,618 --> 00:07:00,519
Okay, three years ago...
151
00:07:00,520 --> 00:07:03,288
we had this whole fantasy
about how great our lives were gonna be...
152
00:07:03,289 --> 00:07:04,790
and it didn't pan out.
153
00:07:04,791 --> 00:07:06,792
But I'm tellin' you, three years from now...
154
00:07:06,793 --> 00:07:08,960
when we're watchin' the trilogy in 2006...
155
00:07:08,961 --> 00:07:11,791
our lives are gonna be awesome.
156
00:07:12,265 --> 00:07:15,257
## [Orchestra: Classical]
157
00:07:18,504 --> 00:07:20,572
Ah, hello, Ted.
158
00:07:20,573 --> 00:07:22,040
I'm an environmental lawyer now.
159
00:07:22,041 --> 00:07:24,042
Sure, it's not the most lucrative field...
160
00:07:24,043 --> 00:07:26,044
but luckily I have the cash and prizes...
161
00:07:26,045 --> 00:07:28,880
from my historic seven-week run...
162
00:07:28,881 --> 00:07:31,083
on Wheel of Fortune.
163
00:07:31,084 --> 00:07:33,385
Can I make just one little adjustment?
164
00:07:33,386 --> 00:07:36,988
For which I was knighted
by Her Majesty the Queen.
165
00:07:36,989 --> 00:07:38,990
Ah, Lady Aldrin.
166
00:07:38,991 --> 00:07:41,259
Oh, Sir Marshall.
167
00:07:41,260 --> 00:07:44,830
I cannot wait to get a house
down the street from your parents...
168
00:07:44,831 --> 00:07:48,633
so we can be close to your mom,
whom I get along with now.
169
00:07:48,634 --> 00:07:49,935
[Chuckles]
170
00:07:49,936 --> 00:07:51,470
But here's the best part.
171
00:07:51,471 --> 00:07:53,438
Rhiannon. Hurry.
172
00:07:53,439 --> 00:07:58,110
Just because I designed the opera house
doesn't mean they'll hold the curtain for us.
173
00:07:58,111 --> 00:08:00,545
[Chuckles]
Just kidding. Of course it does.
174
00:08:00,546 --> 00:08:03,046
Take your time, my love.
175
00:08:03,916 --> 00:08:06,017
Hey, guys, it's me again.
176
00:08:06,018 --> 00:08:10,622
I'm pretty much the same as last time,
only now I'm super rich and fancy.
177
00:08:10,623 --> 00:08:12,657
Oh.
[Speaking French]
178
00:08:12,658 --> 00:08:14,526
- [Tittering]
- [Tittering]
179
00:08:14,527 --> 00:08:17,662
And it still makes sense
that we all live together.
180
00:08:17,663 --> 00:08:19,631
[Laughing]
181
00:08:19,632 --> 00:08:22,934
What about you, Barney?
Any predictions for 2006?
182
00:08:22,935 --> 00:08:25,103
Oh, yeah. Picture it.
183
00:08:25,104 --> 00:08:27,205
By the way, guys, this is Jodie.
184
00:08:27,206 --> 00:08:30,208
You'll be seeing a lot more of Jodie.
185
00:08:30,209 --> 00:08:31,676
[Chuckling]
186
00:08:31,677 --> 00:08:34,212
And they never saw her again.
187
00:08:34,213 --> 00:08:36,773
Whazzup?
188
00:08:36,849 --> 00:08:40,118
How is that any different
from your life right now?
189
00:08:40,119 --> 00:08:42,187
It's not. I'm K. F.C., baby.
190
00:08:42,188 --> 00:08:44,723
You don't mess with the colonel's recipe.
191
00:08:44,724 --> 00:08:48,293
I want things to stay exactly the same,
but with a different hottie.
192
00:08:48,294 --> 00:08:50,729
'Cause Barney don't slurp
no sloppy seconds...
193
00:08:50,730 --> 00:08:53,597
especially his own.
194
00:08:53,666 --> 00:08:57,002
Okay, the bottom line is
things are gonna get better.
195
00:08:57,003 --> 00:09:00,705
- All I care about is getting into law school.
- You will.
196
00:09:00,706 --> 00:09:03,266
2006 is gonna be awesome.
197
00:09:07,814 --> 00:09:09,448
And look what happened.
198
00:09:09,449 --> 00:09:12,818
You got into law school,
just like I said you would.
199
00:09:12,819 --> 00:09:15,020
See? Things aren't so bad.
200
00:09:15,021 --> 00:09:17,422
Lily left me.
201
00:09:17,423 --> 00:09:21,763
[Sobbing]
And now I'll never have a mustache.
202
00:09:26,432 --> 00:09:28,767
Ah, baby, there you are.
203
00:09:28,768 --> 00:09:33,038
I have spent all day thinking
about all the naughty, naughty
things you and I are gonna do-
204
00:09:33,039 --> 00:09:34,606
to cheer up Marshall.
205
00:09:34,607 --> 00:09:36,575
Like what?
206
00:09:36,576 --> 00:09:40,045
Um, uh, I'll let you guys hang out, okay?
207
00:09:40,046 --> 00:09:42,881
Um, I'll just be waiting in the bedroom.
208
00:09:42,882 --> 00:09:44,483
[Chuckles]
Oh, I'm sorry.
209
00:09:44,484 --> 00:09:46,251
I didn't mean that to sound like...
210
00:09:46,252 --> 00:09:48,386
"Ted and I are gonna do it" kind of thing.
211
00:09:48,387 --> 00:09:50,887
Okay?
[Mouths Words]
212
00:09:52,458 --> 00:09:54,826
Okay. Okay. See ya.
213
00:09:54,827 --> 00:09:57,362
Marshall, this will pass. Trust me.
214
00:09:57,363 --> 00:09:59,863
Three years from now-
215
00:10:01,667 --> 00:10:06,037
Briefcase, lawyer, knighthood, mustache,
all that stuff from before.
216
00:10:06,038 --> 00:10:07,706
Congratulations, bro.
217
00:10:07,707 --> 00:10:12,444
And congratulations to you, too, Ted,
for locking this down.
218
00:10:12,445 --> 00:10:13,945
You know what's weird?
219
00:10:13,946 --> 00:10:16,648
I never thought I would get married,
but you talked me into it.
220
00:10:16,649 --> 00:10:18,750
Or rather, banged me into it.
221
00:10:18,751 --> 00:10:20,685
[Giggles]
You're so good in bed. Ooh.
222
00:10:20,686 --> 00:10:22,654
[Both Moaning]
223
00:10:22,655 --> 00:10:25,423
- How is this helping me?
- I'm getting to it.
224
00:10:25,424 --> 00:10:29,661
In three years,
not only will Lily be back, but-
225
00:10:29,662 --> 00:10:33,431
Ah, it's so nice to be married
to a wonderful guy...
226
00:10:33,432 --> 00:10:36,196
and be carrying his child.
227
00:10:36,269 --> 00:10:38,603
I think you're being kind of optimistic, Ted.
228
00:10:38,604 --> 00:10:41,273
Can I make one little adjustment?
229
00:10:41,274 --> 00:10:44,843
Ah, it's so nice to be married
to a wonderful guy...
230
00:10:44,844 --> 00:10:46,745
and carrying his child.
231
00:10:46,746 --> 00:10:48,914
And here he is now.
232
00:10:48,915 --> 00:10:52,918
Guys, I want you to meet
some douchey guy named Trey.
233
00:10:52,919 --> 00:10:55,387
- 'Sup, brah?
- Mmm.
234
00:10:55,388 --> 00:10:59,624
I don't know what I love more-
his thick mustache or his trucker hat.
235
00:10:59,625 --> 00:11:01,927
You know I hate those hats.
236
00:11:01,928 --> 00:11:05,898
Then you're really gonna hate this sonogram.
237
00:11:07,500 --> 00:11:11,095
No!
238
00:11:11,170 --> 00:11:15,470
No!
239
00:11:15,541 --> 00:11:19,144
A baby in a trucker hat. That's awesome.
240
00:11:19,145 --> 00:11:22,795
Anyway, Ted's right. 2009 is gonna rule.
241
00:11:22,848 --> 00:11:24,716
By the way, guys, this is Maya.
242
00:11:24,717 --> 00:11:28,097
You'll be seeing a lot more of Maya.
243
00:11:29,555 --> 00:11:32,995
And they never saw her again. Whazzup?
244
00:11:33,025 --> 00:11:35,493
Okay, seriously,
at least tell me you're gonna change...
245
00:11:35,494 --> 00:11:38,563
the what will by then be
nine-year-old beer commercial reference.
246
00:11:38,564 --> 00:11:42,334
There's gotta be at least one way
that you'd like the future to be different.
247
00:11:42,335 --> 00:11:44,963
I guess there is one thing.
248
00:11:45,037 --> 00:11:48,873
By the way, guys, this is Maya.
You'll be seeing a lot more of Maya.
249
00:11:48,874 --> 00:11:51,009
And not because of these.
250
00:11:51,010 --> 00:11:53,945
Because of these.
251
00:11:54,880 --> 00:11:56,247
Back boobs.
252
00:11:56,248 --> 00:11:58,249
The visual stimulation of missionary...
253
00:11:58,250 --> 00:12:00,619
meets the emotional detachment
of doggie style.
254
00:12:00,620 --> 00:12:03,120
Patent pending. Whazzup?
255
00:12:03,823 --> 00:12:05,323
The point is, Marshall...
256
00:12:05,324 --> 00:12:10,354
this time in three years,
everything is gonna be great.
257
00:12:13,432 --> 00:12:15,500
See? Lily came back.
258
00:12:15,501 --> 00:12:19,204
Of course,
Robin and I didn't end up together.
259
00:12:19,205 --> 00:12:21,039
But I did get engaged...
260
00:12:21,040 --> 00:12:22,874
and left at the altar.
261
00:12:22,875 --> 00:12:25,377
But I did start my own architectural firm.
262
00:12:25,378 --> 00:12:26,878
And it failed after two months.
263
00:12:26,879 --> 00:12:29,080
- Can we put the movie on, please?
- Yeah. Sure, buddy.
264
00:12:29,081 --> 00:12:30,615
Hey, by the way, where is Robin?
265
00:12:30,616 --> 00:12:32,751
[Ted Narrating]
In the summer of 2009...
266
00:12:32,752 --> 00:12:34,986
Barney and Robin were secretly dating.
267
00:12:34,987 --> 00:12:38,490
Oh. Uh, Barney says she's taking some
extension class in how to decoupage...
268
00:12:38,491 --> 00:12:40,925
and Barney's taking a different
decoupage class in the same building.
269
00:12:40,926 --> 00:12:44,229
That's why they shared
that cab that one time.
270
00:12:44,230 --> 00:12:46,398
[Ted Narrating]
We were idiots.
271
00:12:46,399 --> 00:12:48,667
Wait a minute.
272
00:12:48,668 --> 00:12:50,669
You're saying that Barney Stinson...
273
00:12:50,670 --> 00:12:53,170
is at a decoupage class?
274
00:12:53,939 --> 00:12:56,074
That means we can watch Star Wars
on his giant TV.
275
00:12:56,075 --> 00:12:58,575
Punch it, Chewy.
276
00:13:01,247 --> 00:13:03,381
[Panting, Gasping]
277
00:13:03,382 --> 00:13:05,483
Oh. You're back from decoupage.
278
00:13:05,484 --> 00:13:06,818
What's decoupage?
279
00:13:06,819 --> 00:13:09,320
Oh, uh, yeah,
I took that cab there that one time.
280
00:13:09,321 --> 00:13:11,821
Hold on.
281
00:13:12,425 --> 00:13:14,925
Come on in.
282
00:13:16,295 --> 00:13:19,631
- Uh, we were hoping we could
watch the trilogy here.
- Uh, sure.
283
00:13:19,632 --> 00:13:21,633
But, uh...
284
00:13:21,634 --> 00:13:23,702
first go look out my, uh, bedroom window.
285
00:13:23,703 --> 00:13:26,004
There's a, uh...
286
00:13:26,005 --> 00:13:28,633
naked lady, uh...
287
00:13:28,708 --> 00:13:31,209
jumping up and down on a mini-trampoline...
288
00:13:31,210 --> 00:13:35,271
in the apartment across the, uh, street.
289
00:13:35,347 --> 00:13:37,847
[Gasps]
290
00:13:41,554 --> 00:13:44,122
- Get me out of this thing.
- There's no time.
291
00:13:44,123 --> 00:13:46,458
I'm not ready for them to find out about us.
292
00:13:46,459 --> 00:13:48,593
Then you're gonna have to stay in there
for the entire trilogy.
293
00:13:48,594 --> 00:13:50,528
- Wha-
- Don't worry. It's only 382 minutes.
294
00:13:50,529 --> 00:13:53,029
Nerd.
295
00:13:55,101 --> 00:13:59,104
So where do you guys think
we'll be in three years? It'll be 2012.
296
00:13:59,105 --> 00:14:01,039
That's an easy one.
297
00:14:01,040 --> 00:14:05,977
- Guys, this is Sophia.
You'll be seeing a lot more of-
- [Glass Shatters]
298
00:14:05,978 --> 00:14:07,979
[Marshall]
Okay, that is so weird.
299
00:14:07,980 --> 00:14:11,245
I was just trying to use the Force.
300
00:14:11,317 --> 00:14:14,686
I mean, do you think instead of
making a beer fly out of the fridge...
301
00:14:14,687 --> 00:14:16,788
I made that lamp break?
302
00:14:16,789 --> 00:14:18,890
Either that or the stormtrooper did.
303
00:14:18,891 --> 00:14:20,825
[Laughing]
304
00:14:20,826 --> 00:14:22,827
Oh, the stormtrooper would never do that.
305
00:14:22,828 --> 00:14:26,059
He knows that lamp cost $1,200.
306
00:14:27,166 --> 00:14:29,000
Anyway, while it's just us guys...
307
00:14:29,001 --> 00:14:30,802
Iet me ask you something.
308
00:14:30,803 --> 00:14:33,671
We've all had that same fantasy
about having sex...
309
00:14:33,672 --> 00:14:36,007
with a girl in
a stormtrooper costume, right?
310
00:14:36,008 --> 00:14:38,568
- Mmm, no.
- Never.
311
00:14:38,644 --> 00:14:40,345
Guys.
312
00:14:40,346 --> 00:14:41,946
Come on. No girls around.
313
00:14:41,947 --> 00:14:43,948
Just us bros. Safe space.
314
00:14:43,949 --> 00:14:47,485
Let's stop being polite
and start gettin' real.
315
00:14:47,486 --> 00:14:50,421
Stormtrooper fantasy.
Every guy's had that one, right?
316
00:14:50,422 --> 00:14:53,252
- Not even once, no.
- No. No.
317
00:14:54,059 --> 00:14:55,860
So I'm the weird one?
318
00:14:55,861 --> 00:14:58,625
- Yeah.
- Yeah. Yeah.
319
00:14:58,697 --> 00:15:02,834
How about you, Ted? How's your life gonna
be different in, what, three years?
320
00:15:02,835 --> 00:15:04,936
Oh, you know, the usual.
321
00:15:04,937 --> 00:15:07,105
Gonna meet a nice girl and get married.
322
00:15:07,106 --> 00:15:10,275
I mean, I know I say that every year,
but let's be honest.
323
00:15:10,276 --> 00:15:12,443
In 2012, I'll be 34.
324
00:15:12,444 --> 00:15:14,579
If it still hasn't happened for me by then...
325
00:15:14,580 --> 00:15:16,848
something is seriously wrong with me.
326
00:15:16,849 --> 00:15:19,184
[Laughing]
327
00:15:19,185 --> 00:15:22,018
You know? Seriously.
328
00:15:28,460 --> 00:15:31,770
Something is seriously wrong with me.
329
00:15:37,036 --> 00:15:38,536
I can't do this anymore.
330
00:15:38,537 --> 00:15:41,706
I can't keep smiling
and being optimistic all the time...
331
00:15:41,707 --> 00:15:43,975
when all the evidence
points to the contrary.
332
00:15:43,976 --> 00:15:47,645
You really think that three years from now,
things aren't gonna be awesome?
333
00:15:47,646 --> 00:15:53,585
I'll tell you what things are gonna
be like three years from now.
334
00:15:53,586 --> 00:15:55,053
Uh, yes, hello.
335
00:15:55,054 --> 00:15:58,490
I see on my frozen entrée for one...
336
00:15:58,557 --> 00:16:00,458
they printed this number...
337
00:16:00,459 --> 00:16:03,294
where I can voice comments and concerns.
338
00:16:03,295 --> 00:16:08,245
Well, there's more cinnamon
in the cobbler than usual.
339
00:16:09,001 --> 00:16:11,501
No, I like cinnamon.
340
00:16:12,705 --> 00:16:16,355
Mmm, you're very welcome for my comment.
341
00:16:16,775 --> 00:16:19,275
Wait, uh, don't go.
342
00:16:20,145 --> 00:16:22,943
Um, do you like cinnamon?
343
00:16:23,015 --> 00:16:25,515
Hello? Hello?
344
00:16:31,323 --> 00:16:33,791
Marshall, you want to watch Star Wars?
345
00:16:33,792 --> 00:16:35,226
No can do, old bean.
346
00:16:35,227 --> 00:16:36,928
You see, we're up on the Cape...
347
00:16:36,929 --> 00:16:39,931
Iiving the idyllic family lifestyle
that you've always dreamed of.
348
00:16:39,932 --> 00:16:44,198
Oh, and I'm pregnant with baby number five.
349
00:16:44,270 --> 00:16:46,337
Baby number four isn't even out yet.
350
00:16:46,338 --> 00:16:48,339
I'm just that good.
[Chuckles]
351
00:16:48,340 --> 00:16:52,377
Oh, hold on. There's somebody
wants to say hello to you.
352
00:16:52,378 --> 00:16:55,546
Hey, Ted, I just wanted to say
that things are great...
353
00:16:55,547 --> 00:16:58,683
and I'm married to that douchey guy
in the trucker hat.
354
00:16:58,684 --> 00:17:01,184
Whassup, brah?
355
00:17:01,453 --> 00:17:05,123
It turns out it was just you
I didn't want to commit to.
356
00:17:05,124 --> 00:17:07,125
[All Laughing]
357
00:17:07,126 --> 00:17:10,028
Oh, and I got back boobs.
[Giggling]
358
00:17:10,029 --> 00:17:12,827
So things are great. Buh-bye.
359
00:17:12,898 --> 00:17:15,924
- [Squeals]
- [All Laughing]
360
00:17:16,001 --> 00:17:17,702
[Beeps]
361
00:17:17,703 --> 00:17:19,737
By the way, Ted, this is Melanie.
362
00:17:19,738 --> 00:17:21,906
You'll be seeing a lot more of Melanie.
363
00:17:21,907 --> 00:17:24,375
W- W-Wait a minute. Who is Melanie?
364
00:17:24,376 --> 00:17:26,577
Barney, if there's one thing
I can count on not to change...
365
00:17:26,578 --> 00:17:29,314
it's you walking in
with some random girl on your arm.
366
00:17:29,315 --> 00:17:31,683
No. No, I don't want that.
367
00:17:31,684 --> 00:17:34,252
For the first time in my life...
368
00:17:34,253 --> 00:17:37,255
I don't want to find myself in three years
with some random girl...
369
00:17:37,256 --> 00:17:40,224
no matter how many boobs she has.
370
00:17:40,225 --> 00:17:42,725
I want to be with Quinn.
371
00:17:44,763 --> 00:17:48,866
Guys, you're gonna be
seeing a lot more of Quinn.
372
00:17:48,867 --> 00:17:51,336
Dude, we've been to the Lusty Leopard.
We've seen plenty.
373
00:17:51,337 --> 00:17:56,097
I kind of walked into that one.
All right, buh-bye.
374
00:17:59,611 --> 00:18:02,447
- What are you doing?
- We're living together. I'm excited about it.
375
00:18:02,448 --> 00:18:05,378
And I'm gettin' rid of my mugs.
376
00:18:06,018 --> 00:18:09,754
- That was mine.
- Sorry. I don't know which are which.
377
00:18:09,755 --> 00:18:13,591
The truth is, I never drink coffee at home.
378
00:18:13,592 --> 00:18:15,460
- This one?
- Mm-hmm.
379
00:18:15,461 --> 00:18:18,129
There. I don't need my coffee mugs
'cause I got yours.
380
00:18:18,130 --> 00:18:20,630
For the rest of my life.
381
00:18:21,300 --> 00:18:23,301
Or as long as you'll have me.
382
00:18:23,302 --> 00:18:25,470
We haven't really talked about the future.
383
00:18:25,471 --> 00:18:27,271
Did I make things awkward?
384
00:18:27,272 --> 00:18:29,807
- Just keep smashing mugs.
- [Chuckles]
385
00:18:29,808 --> 00:18:32,210
Or donate them.
386
00:18:32,211 --> 00:18:37,148
The point is,
I plan on being with you for a long time.
387
00:18:37,149 --> 00:18:39,649
You okay with that?
388
00:18:42,554 --> 00:18:45,234
- [Shatters]
- Sounds great.
389
00:18:47,493 --> 00:18:49,993
- Ooh.
- Ohh. [Farts]
390
00:18:52,264 --> 00:18:54,632
I am so sorry.
391
00:18:54,633 --> 00:18:56,534
No, no, it's great.
392
00:18:56,535 --> 00:18:59,203
A guy has to be the first one to let it rip.
393
00:18:59,204 --> 00:19:01,205
I was actually hoping
this would happen soon.
394
00:19:01,206 --> 00:19:03,775
I've been crop-dusting the patio for weeks.
395
00:19:03,776 --> 00:19:05,643
The patio.
396
00:19:05,644 --> 00:19:07,645
I've been going out on the street.
397
00:19:07,646 --> 00:19:10,615
Like exactly this time, every night.
398
00:19:10,616 --> 00:19:13,116
Where are you, blond man?
399
00:19:13,185 --> 00:19:15,486
Show yourself.
400
00:19:15,487 --> 00:19:17,987
I'll be at my mother's.
401
00:19:18,490 --> 00:19:21,192
We're a real couple now, aren't we?
402
00:19:21,193 --> 00:19:23,693
We are.
403
00:19:24,096 --> 00:19:26,776
- [Farts]
- [Farts, Gasps]
404
00:19:28,067 --> 00:19:29,567
Mmm.
405
00:19:29,568 --> 00:19:32,637
Hey, buddy, I get that you're bummed.
406
00:19:32,638 --> 00:19:35,873
But l-I got a good feeling about 2015.
407
00:19:35,874 --> 00:19:38,142
I think that's gonna be your year.
408
00:19:38,143 --> 00:19:40,144
[Ted Narrating]
Kids, that was the one time...
409
00:19:40,145 --> 00:19:44,515
I ever lost faith in the idea that my life
would be better in three years.
410
00:19:44,516 --> 00:19:49,387
And what's funny is, three years
from that moment, my life was amazing.
411
00:19:49,388 --> 00:19:52,557
- All right. It's trilogy time.
- Can I just lodge one complaint?
412
00:19:52,558 --> 00:19:56,627
This is a guys tradition. It's kind of
a lame move on Ted's part to bring a chick.
413
00:19:56,628 --> 00:19:59,163
Come on, dude. Cut him some slack.
414
00:19:59,164 --> 00:20:00,465
I know. He loves her.
415
00:20:00,466 --> 00:20:03,167
And I'll give him this-
she is pretty damn cute.
416
00:20:03,168 --> 00:20:05,570
Thank God she takes after her mother.
417
00:20:05,571 --> 00:20:08,691
All right. Let's watch this thing.
418
00:20:09,274 --> 00:20:14,678
TV, play Star Wars trilogy.
419
00:20:16,548 --> 00:20:19,517
Play Star Wars tril-
420
00:20:19,585 --> 00:20:22,085
You know what? Screw it.
421
00:20:23,155 --> 00:20:26,724
Okay, you are about
to see something awesome.
422
00:20:26,725 --> 00:20:28,426
And just know this-
423
00:20:28,427 --> 00:20:30,528
Han shot first.
424
00:20:30,529 --> 00:20:31,996
[Whispers]
It's true.
425
00:20:31,997 --> 00:20:34,232
I wonder if things
will be a lot different...
426
00:20:34,233 --> 00:20:37,668
when we watch the trilogy again in 2018.
427
00:20:37,669 --> 00:20:40,169
I hope not.
428
00:20:46,211 --> 00:20:50,001
[Gasping, Panting]
Oh, that was awesome.
429
00:20:51,650 --> 00:20:53,951
You were right. Not weird.
430
00:20:53,952 --> 00:20:56,452
No.
[Chuckling]
431
00:20:57,189 --> 00:20:59,714
[Moaning]
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