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1
00:00:01,371 --> 00:00:05,001
Kids,on New Year's Day
2012,Uncle Marshall took a trip
2
00:00:05,001 --> 00:00:08,421
to Minnesota to see
someone he truly missed.
3
00:00:08,421 --> 00:00:12,461
marven**
4
00:00:13,201 --> 00:00:15,131
Hey,Pop.
5
00:00:15,481 --> 00:00:18,021
I can't believe it's been a year.
6
00:00:18,301 --> 00:00:24,251
I think the most appropriate
way to honor your memory today...
7
00:00:24,251 --> 00:00:29,871
is to get blasted and watch the Vikings make
the Bears their furry little bitches. Go,Vikes!
8
00:00:30,781 --> 00:00:32,821
Sorry for your loss.
9
00:00:33,421 --> 00:00:36,551
Which is what we'll be saying to the
Bears in about three hours,right,Pop?
10
00:00:36,551 --> 00:00:38,931
Kids,tailgating at
the Vikings-Bears game
11
00:00:38,931 --> 00:00:41,601
was a tradition for Uncle
Marshall and his dad.
12
00:00:41,881 --> 00:00:46,031
That's how the government covered
up the UFO crash in Roswell:
13
00:00:46,031 --> 00:00:52,241
by canning the sliced up alien
carcasses and calling it Spam.
14
00:00:52,241 --> 00:00:56,341
aka***
15
00:00:56,341 --> 00:01:00,081
Wow. Is there anything
you don't know,Dad?
16
00:01:00,081 --> 00:01:03,051
No. I know most stuff.
17
00:01:03,051 --> 00:01:05,501
And in your honor...
18
00:01:05,501 --> 00:01:10,081
three decades of pork
fat,lighter fluid and Bengay.
19
00:01:11,621 --> 00:01:13,911
Dear God,that's the stuff.
20
00:01:13,911 --> 00:01:15,781
So much to catch you up on.
21
00:01:15,781 --> 00:01:21,011
So,last night was New Year's
Eve. That's a crazy story.
22
00:01:21,011 --> 00:01:23,371
{\a6}east***
23
00:01:21,271 --> 00:01:23,351
So you haven't told your
dad that you're pregnant yet?
24
00:01:23,351 --> 00:01:26,081
No. But why should I?
25
00:01:26,081 --> 00:01:27,811
My dad has never been there for me.
26
00:01:27,811 --> 00:01:31,151
This is just another chance
for him to let me down.
27
00:01:31,151 --> 00:01:33,341
Lily,you have to tell him.
28
00:01:33,341 --> 00:01:36,251
He's at some board game
convention in Chicago.
29
00:01:36,251 --> 00:01:38,211
He's your dad.
30
00:01:38,861 --> 00:01:40,711
I don't see why people
aren't getting this.
31
00:01:40,711 --> 00:01:44,971
Shoplifter does not promote
crime. It celebrates it.
32
00:01:44,971 --> 00:01:47,791
Excuse me. Yeah.
33
00:01:47,791 --> 00:01:53,281
Hey,Dad. I'm,uh,calling
with some pretty big news.
34
00:01:53,281 --> 00:01:54,831
I'm pregnant.
35
00:01:54,831 --> 00:01:57,151
Great. Thanks.
36
00:01:57,401 --> 00:02:02,051
-=http://bbs.sfile2012.com=-
-=http://ytet.org=-
Proudly Presents
37
00:02:02,051 --> 00:02:07,031
-=http://bbs.sfile2012.com=-
-=http://ytet.org=-
Sync: 卡灰
38
00:02:07,031 --> 00:02:11,001
How.I.Met.Your.Mother
S07E13
39
00:02:11,981 --> 00:02:15,841
Anyway,Dad,Ted and Barney's New Year's
Eve wasn't off to a great start,either.
40
00:02:16,991 --> 00:02:18,751
It's 50 bucks,and the
line starts out there.
41
00:02:18,751 --> 00:02:20,481
Uh,we're regulars.
42
00:02:20,481 --> 00:02:22,921
Oh,in that case,the line starts
out there,and it's 50 bucks.
43
00:02:22,921 --> 00:02:24,121
You got a problem with that?
44
00:02:24,121 --> 00:02:27,251
Kids,here's why we didn't
have a problem with that.
45
00:02:29,261 --> 00:02:32,501
And he was even scarier
without the toupee.
46
00:02:32,501 --> 00:02:36,371
- No problem.
- It's a little drafty. We'll get you a nice hot cocoa.
47
00:02:39,081 --> 00:02:42,481
Check it out. Sandy
Rivers' New Year's Eve show.
48
00:02:42,481 --> 00:02:45,901
Thank God I don't have to
produce this frozen pile of poo.
49
00:02:45,901 --> 00:02:47,291
How'd you dodge that bullet?
50
00:02:47,291 --> 00:02:51,501
Well,maybe Tina,the producer,he,uh,picked,is
more talented than I am...
51
00:02:51,501 --> 00:02:55,101
at lying down while Sandy
does his business on her.
52
00:02:55,361 --> 00:02:58,811
Does it bother you that this pervert's
on the air,and you're not anymore?
53
00:02:58,811 --> 00:03:00,831
- Do you miss it?
- What?
54
00:03:00,831 --> 00:03:04,371
Why would... why would I miss it?
55
00:03:04,371 --> 00:03:09,341
No. I would rather be warm and
cozy here in denial-- my apartment.
56
00:03:09,591 --> 00:03:13,291
Robin,I'm no therapist--
wait,yes,I am--
57
00:03:13,291 --> 00:03:15,641
but I've got a New
Year's resolution for you.
58
00:03:15,641 --> 00:03:17,231
Get back on camera.
59
00:03:17,231 --> 00:03:20,781
Mine was going to be "make
a sex tape," so... two birds.
60
00:03:21,571 --> 00:03:24,151
Hold that thought.
61
00:03:24,151 --> 00:03:26,771
Hello? Sandy?
62
00:03:26,771 --> 00:03:30,441
Tina quit. The woman I love just quit.
63
00:03:30,441 --> 00:03:32,941
- Love?
- She's my everything,Robin.
64
00:03:32,941 --> 00:03:36,711
My sun,my stars,my oxygen.
65
00:03:36,711 --> 00:03:41,201
Plus,she likes it fast and
dirty,and that's how Sandy rides.
66
00:03:41,671 --> 00:03:43,561
I need you here ASAP.
67
00:03:43,561 --> 00:03:47,451
Are you kidding me? Marcus?
What the heck are you doing here?
68
00:03:47,451 --> 00:03:49,351
What the heck are you doing here?
69
00:03:49,351 --> 00:03:52,581
I wanted to see Dad
today-- in private.
70
00:03:52,581 --> 00:03:57,301
Well,I had the same idea,and I drove
all the way from Mom's,so get lost.
71
00:03:57,301 --> 00:03:59,811
I flew here,so you get lost.
72
00:03:59,811 --> 00:04:04,421
Um,I'm trying to have a poignant moment
with our departed father,turd face.
73
00:04:04,421 --> 00:04:09,221
Well,I'm trying to feel Dad's spirit
flow through my soul,butt breath.
74
00:04:09,221 --> 00:04:13,341
I'm reaching out to the beyond to
touch Dad's inner light,ass clown.
75
00:04:13,341 --> 00:04:16,991
I hear Dad's voice like an ethereal song
76
00:04:16,991 --> 00:04:20,821
guiding me toward
salvation,douche nozzle.
77
00:04:20,821 --> 00:04:22,551
- Dibs on Dad.
- Dibs on Dad times infinity.
78
00:04:24,761 --> 00:04:27,151
I'll just pretend like you're not here.
79
00:04:28,511 --> 00:04:31,521
What? Dad,do you hear something?
80
00:04:31,521 --> 00:04:36,761
Perhaps the high-pitched whine of someone
who wet their bed until they were 11!
81
00:04:36,761 --> 00:04:38,761
Ten.
82
00:04:39,681 --> 00:04:44,151
Anyway,Dad,since it's
just the two of us...
83
00:04:44,151 --> 00:04:48,461
Lily and I were going to spend
New Year's unpacking the baby room.
84
00:04:48,461 --> 00:04:51,471
Um,sweetie,why is this book in here?
85
00:04:51,471 --> 00:04:53,341
That's Enigmas of The Mystical.
86
00:04:53,341 --> 00:04:55,871
It's all about mysterious
and unexplained phenomena.
87
00:04:55,871 --> 00:04:58,621
Don't you remember the TV
commercials from the '80s?
88
00:04:58,621 --> 00:05:02,441
June 17th,1983. Tempe,Arizona.
89
00:05:02,441 --> 00:05:05,091
A woman makes a chicken salad sandwich.
90
00:05:05,091 --> 00:05:06,911
Chicken salad sandwich.
91
00:05:06,911 --> 00:05:08,851
Halfway across the country in Michigan,
92
00:05:08,851 --> 00:05:13,211
her daughter is compelled to make
almost exactly the same sandwich.
93
00:05:13,211 --> 00:05:15,521
- Tuna salad.
- Coincidence?
94
00:05:15,521 --> 00:05:19,601
Or an enigma of the mystical!
95
00:05:20,511 --> 00:05:24,191
Yeah,those enigmas always
seemed a bit thin to me.
96
00:05:24,191 --> 00:05:28,431
Thin? Lily,this is 200
pages of detailed accounts
97
00:05:28,431 --> 00:05:31,451
about Bigfoot,ghosts,aliens
abducting people
98
00:05:31,451 --> 00:05:33,041
from their beds and probing them.
99
00:05:33,041 --> 00:05:35,681
I'm going to read it to
Baby Eriksen at night-night.
100
00:05:35,681 --> 00:05:39,561
You really want to read our kid
bedtime stories about monsters?
101
00:05:39,561 --> 00:05:41,341
First of all,I wouldn't
use the "M" word.
102
00:05:41,341 --> 00:05:42,701
Only they can call themselves that.
103
00:05:42,701 --> 00:05:45,891
And secondly,are you really saying you
don't want to raise our child as a believer?
104
00:05:46,331 --> 00:05:49,811
I don't want to brainwash our child
to believe in something with no proof.
105
00:05:49,811 --> 00:05:51,831
It's not about proof; it's about faith.
106
00:05:51,831 --> 00:05:53,911
Faith is what gives
life shape and meaning.
107
00:05:53,911 --> 00:05:55,981
I mean,if there aren't
yetis or leprechauns,
108
00:05:55,981 --> 00:05:58,031
what's the point of even
getting up in the morning?
109
00:05:58,031 --> 00:06:02,101
I don't know. Wife,unborn
child,drop a deuce?
110
00:06:02,101 --> 00:06:05,211
Lily,don't you think
it's a bit narcissistic
111
00:06:05,211 --> 00:06:07,861
not to allow for something
bigger than us out there?
112
00:06:07,861 --> 00:06:13,261
Something whose beauty and
power and majesty humbles us?
113
00:06:13,261 --> 00:06:15,191
- God?
- Werewolves.
114
00:06:18,251 --> 00:06:22,791
So,as the countdown to 212
continues,a quick warning,America:
115
00:06:23,151 --> 00:06:27,991
Tina Henderson is a soulless
bitch who will stomp on your heart.
116
00:06:28,651 --> 00:06:32,551
I need you back,Tina. I love you.
117
00:06:32,551 --> 00:06:35,351
Well,if that's as bad as
it gets,we might be okay.
118
00:06:35,351 --> 00:06:37,821
Bathroom break.
119
00:06:40,011 --> 00:06:43,181
Oh,good. It's on the Jumbotron.
120
00:06:43,721 --> 00:06:46,241
- Oh,finally.
- Yeah,that'll be 100 bucks each.
121
00:06:46,241 --> 00:06:48,101
- What?
- You said 50.
122
00:06:48,101 --> 00:06:50,091
That was before the place got crowded.
123
00:06:50,091 --> 00:06:52,351
Okay? It's New Year's Eve.
People get rowdy and break stuff.
124
00:06:52,351 --> 00:06:58,241
The cover protects us. Plus,you get these
festive hats. For an additional 15 bucks.
125
00:06:59,601 --> 00:07:02,151
- They're wet.
- Dry ones are 20.
126
00:07:02,521 --> 00:07:06,671
That's it. Don't bother,everybody.
MacLaren's is a rip-off!
127
00:07:06,671 --> 00:07:10,041
You'd all be better off coming
upstairs to my place for a beer.
128
00:07:10,041 --> 00:07:13,171
Hey,dude. You serious?
129
00:07:13,581 --> 00:07:20,071
Ted,do you remember a couple yea
ago,we had the best idea of a time?
130
00:07:20,071 --> 00:07:24,371
- We should buy a bar.
- Of course! We could buy a bar!
131
00:07:24,371 --> 00:07:28,171
The name of our bar? Puzzles.
132
00:07:28,171 --> 00:07:30,681
People will be like,"Why
is it called Puzzles?
133
00:07:30,681 --> 00:07:32,931
" That's the puzzle.
134
00:07:33,621 --> 00:07:38,921
A bar where no one's overcharged,where
everyone feels valued and respected.
135
00:07:38,921 --> 00:07:44,071
A bar... where we get
chicks drunk and bang them.
136
00:07:44,071 --> 00:07:48,171
- We're opening Puzzles tonight.
- Of course we're opening Puzzles tonight!
137
00:07:49,151 --> 00:07:52,341
Aren't you going to ask
us why it's called Puzzles?
138
00:07:52,341 --> 00:07:53,861
Nope.
139
00:07:54,241 --> 00:07:55,651
Okay.
140
00:07:55,651 --> 00:07:59,501
Okay,we're back live in 30 seconds. ***
141
00:08:00,091 --> 00:08:03,671
I don't know. Uht's see if
he's still wearing his mic.
142
00:08:04,161 --> 00:08:07,921
Taxi,take me to Tina's
house. 50 West 67th.
143
00:08:07,921 --> 00:08:11,931
Sir,this is a falafel stand,and
you're sitting in the hummu
144
00:08:12,301 --> 00:08:15,981
Okay. Run the montage of people
who died this year until I get back.
145
00:08:15,981 --> 00:08:19,281
And add Sandy,because when I
find him,I'm going to kill him.
146
00:08:27,154 --> 00:08:29,474
- Anyway,Dad...
- Stop hogging Dad already.
147
00:08:29,474 --> 00:08:30,884
I've got stuff to tell him,too.
148
00:08:30,884 --> 00:08:34,404
Like what? You're still living
with Mom,and you have no job.
149
00:08:34,924 --> 00:08:36,524
Go ahead.
150
00:08:36,814 --> 00:08:38,504
So,anyway...
151
00:08:38,504 --> 00:08:43,144
July 8,19. Cheyenne,Wyoming.
152
00:08:43,144 --> 00:08:47,534
A hunter spots a hairy
form in the fore. Bigfoot.
153
00:08:47,534 --> 00:08:49,724
His story is dismissed
because,to be honest,
154
00:08:49,724 --> 00:08:53,324
he'd been drinking and had
a history of mental problems.
155
00:08:53,324 --> 00:08:56,264
But was it a hoax? Or
was it an enigma of the...
156
00:08:56,264 --> 00:08:59,884
- It was an idiot in a gorilla suit.
- Enigma.
157
00:08:59,884 --> 00:09:02,004
- Gorilla suit.
- Enigma!
158
00:09:02,004 --> 00:09:04,034
Gorilla suit!
159
00:09:04,034 --> 00:09:08,154
Marshall? Marcus? What
are you guys doing he?
160
00:09:08,154 --> 00:09:10,274
Having a private moment with Dad.
161
00:09:10,274 --> 00:09:13,204
No,I'm having a private moment with Dad.
162
00:09:13,204 --> 00:09:16,084
No,I'm having a private moment with Dad.
163
00:09:16,084 --> 00:09:18,514
Touchdown,Vikings!
164
00:09:26,464 --> 00:09:32,724
Anyway,Dad,since it's still
just the two of us,I'll go on.
165
00:09:35,684 --> 00:09:39,364
I've always envisioned
Puzzles as a literary salon,
166
00:09:39,364 --> 00:09:44,654
where Gotham's intelligentsia hold
court on art,philosophy and literature.
167
00:09:44,654 --> 00:09:48,054
Great. And while you're
distracting the nerds and fatties,
168
00:09:48,054 --> 00:09:51,524
I'll be in the VIP room getting it in.
169
00:09:51,524 --> 00:09:54,044
Uh,yeah,dude,I don't know
where you got a velvet rope,
170
00:09:54,044 --> 00:09:57,514
but you can't use my
room for anonymous sex.
171
00:09:57,514 --> 00:09:59,364
I'm kind of a neat freak that way.
172
00:09:59,364 --> 00:10:01,604
Hey,guys,I have an idea for Puzzles.
173
00:10:01,604 --> 00:10:04,184
What if... What?
174
00:10:04,224 --> 00:10:07,654
- ***
- ****
175
00:10:07,654 --> 00:10:09,274
Oh. Okay. I understand.
176
00:10:09,274 --> 00:10:11,504
But he we like your energy.
177
00:10:11,504 --> 00:10:13,504
How would you like to
be our star bartender.
178
00:10:13,504 --> 00:10:14,894
I've always wanted to be a bartender.
179
00:10:14,894 --> 00:10:16,124
It's just like being a therapist.
180
00:10:16,124 --> 00:10:19,374
You listen to people's problems,pretend
to care,but you can drink openly,
181
00:10:19,374 --> 00:10:21,744
instead of having to hide
your booze in a coffee mug.
182
00:10:21,744 --> 00:10:25,044
Great. Oh,check it out. We worked
out a theme song for Puzzles.
183
00:10:25,044 --> 00:10:29,204
While I was carrying 100-pound kegs
up four flights of stairs? Awesome.
184
00:10:34,704 --> 00:10:37,784
* Puzzles is a place where people go *
185
00:10:37,784 --> 00:10:40,834
* To feel like they belong *
186
00:10:40,834 --> 00:10:43,514
* Gonna take advantage
of dumb drunk girls *
187
00:10:43,514 --> 00:10:44,804
- No,we're not.
- ***
188
00:10:44,804 --> 00:10:47,644
* That would be wrong *
189
00:10:47,644 --> 00:10:53,064
* A place where wit and wisdom bloom *
190
00:10:53,864 --> 00:10:56,894
* A place to bang chicks in Ted's room *
191
00:10:56,894 --> 00:10:59,654
- Not gonna happen.
- We'll talk about it.
192
00:10:59,654 --> 00:11:04,374
* At Puzzles,we all fit together *
193
00:11:04,374 --> 00:11:07,484
* And I'm the bartender! *
194
00:11:08,574 --> 00:11:10,684
- I'll go get the other kegs.
- Probably a good idea.
195
00:11:10,684 --> 00:11:13,914
We got to work out some harmonies.
196
00:11:13,914 --> 00:11:15,304
- * And I'm right here *
- * No,you actually down here *
197
00:11:15,344 --> 00:11:16,924
Excuse me,sir?
198
00:11:16,924 --> 00:11:19,974
About the TVs,we in the
middle burying my aunt,so...
199
00:11:19,974 --> 00:11:21,784
Oh I'm sorry. We'll keep it down.
200
00:11:21,784 --> 00:11:24,524
No,I just want to check out the score.
201
00:11:25,124 --> 00:11:28,604
Actually,I'm trying to have a
private moment with my dad,so...
202
00:11:29,944 --> 00:11:32,884
It's just that I used to
goto Vikes's with my aunt;
203
00:11:32,884 --> 00:11:34,804
may she rest in peace.
204
00:11:40,614 --> 00:11:42,534
Anyway,so back to my story.
205
00:11:43,164 --> 00:11:45,284
She also loved burgers.
206
00:11:52,104 --> 00:11:54,104
So now,back to my story.
207
00:11:54,104 --> 00:11:57,474
Aunt Laura sure loved a toasted bun.
208
00:12:02,804 --> 00:12:04,744
Tina,please tell me Sandy's here.
209
00:12:04,744 --> 00:12:06,564
Don't worry,he's here.
210
00:12:06,564 --> 00:12:09,164
And we're back... together!
211
00:12:09,164 --> 00:12:13,724
He told me he loves me,he's
sorry,and I'm the only girl for him.
212
00:12:14,524 --> 00:12:19,874
You know,since we'll
here,and we're all horny...
213
00:12:20,904 --> 00:12:22,824
I don't know what went wrong.
214
00:12:22,824 --> 00:12:26,824
Well,proposing the three-way was
bad,starting without us was worse,
215
00:12:26,824 --> 00:12:29,414
finishing in the hallway
was the nail in the coffin.
216
00:12:29,414 --> 00:12:32,414
No! Stop drinking! I
gotta get you back on air!
217
00:12:32,414 --> 00:12:36,004
But I'm single and ready
to mingle! Hello,there.
218
00:12:37,274 --> 00:12:42,084
Oh,the Twitter-verse blowing up about a
new apartment-themed bar called Puzzles.
219
00:12:42,084 --> 00:12:43,534
Why is it called Puzzles?
220
00:12:43,534 --> 00:12:45,194
That's the puzzle!
221
00:12:45,194 --> 00:12:50,154
Anyway,this VIP room has a maximum
occupancy of two people including me,
222
00:12:50,154 --> 00:12:53,284
so eeny... and the rest of you may go.
223
00:12:55,954 --> 00:13:01,634
It's funny,but it seems each
time I read James Joyce's Ulysses,
224
00:13:01,634 --> 00:13:05,044
it's a different
book,begging the question:
225
00:13:05,044 --> 00:13:09,054
Has the book changed... or have I?
226
00:13:11,924 --> 00:13:15,334
Okay,people are getting rowdy
and drunk and breaking things.
227
00:13:15,334 --> 00:13:18,024
I know this goes against the Puzzles
mission statement you made me memorize,
228
00:13:18,024 --> 00:13:19,824
but we gotta raise our drink prices.
229
00:13:19,824 --> 00:13:23,054
All right,just a little
bit so no one will notice.
230
00:13:29,354 --> 00:13:31,074
Poodles sucks!
231
00:13:31,074 --> 00:13:34,214
And that's when the night
turned to absolute crap.
232
00:13:31,394 --> 00:13:35,084
{\a6}all***
233
00:13:34,214 --> 00:13:39,444
* At Puzzles,we all fit together *
234
00:13:40,224 --> 00:13:45,664
* On sunny days or stormy weather *
235
00:13:45,664 --> 00:13:48,814
* So pull up a chair and sit' *
236
00:13:48,814 --> 00:13:51,904
* To share and stories to tell *
237
00:13:51,904 --> 00:13:57,344
* Puzzles is a place where
everybody feels at home *
238
00:13:57,344 --> 00:13:59,864
* And we bang chicks in Ted's room. *
239
00:13:59,864 --> 00:14:01,764
What-what do,what do,what do we do?
240
00:14:01,764 --> 00:14:04,114
And so Puzzles got a bouncer,
241
00:14:04,114 --> 00:14:06,674
All right,you know what,you guys?
242
00:14:11,314 --> 00:14:14,644
No. No,no,no,no,no,you said double
what MacLaren's was paying me.
243
00:14:14,964 --> 00:14:18,074
And why isn't anyone wearing
the hats I brought up?!
244
00:14:20,714 --> 00:14:23,614
"November 14th... "1982.
245
00:14:23,614 --> 00:14:27,004
"Everglades National Park,Florida.
246
00:14:27,004 --> 00:14:29,684
"Five mysterious lights
dance in the night sky.
247
00:14:29,684 --> 00:14:32,604
"A ray shoots down,lifting
the park ranger,"
248
00:14:32,604 --> 00:14:36,174
who,to be fair,was going
through a bad divorce
249
00:14:36,174 --> 00:14:40,044
and had a habit of
lying to get attention.
250
00:14:41,134 --> 00:14:42,574
" I hate this job,Sandy!
251
00:14:42,574 --> 00:14:44,494
I went into journalism
to make a difference,
252
00:14:44,494 --> 00:14:47,034
but you have made that impossible.
253
00:14:47,034 --> 00:14:49,474
You know,to be honest,it hasn't
been an easy couple months for me.
254
00:14:49,474 --> 00:14:52,494
I've made mistakes. I've felt alone.
255
00:14:52,494 --> 00:14:55,134
I had to let go of dreams
I didn't even know I had.
256
00:14:55,134 --> 00:14:57,074
So here's the deal:
257
00:14:57,074 --> 00:14:59,904
You're gonna get back on air
and count us into a better year,
258
00:14:59,904 --> 00:15:03,264
because I just can't do 2011 anymore.
259
00:15:03,264 --> 00:15:05,374
You with me?
260
00:15:05,494 --> 00:15:07,564
He's not with me,is he?
261
00:15:14,541 --> 00:15:16,441
Anyway,Dad,where was I?
262
00:15:16,441 --> 00:15:17,701
{\a6}all***
263
00:15:17,261 --> 00:15:20,631
You know what? Fine,get out
of here! We don't need ya!
264
00:15:23,861 --> 00:15:26,731
And why doesn't anybody like these hats?
265
00:15:27,511 --> 00:15:29,971
I made these hats.
266
00:15:29,971 --> 00:15:34,681
It's because they' wet,Doug.
Why are they all wet?!
267
00:15:34,681 --> 00:15:36,811
Were those our last customers?
268
00:15:36,811 --> 00:15:39,491
Let me go check the bathroom.
269
00:15:42,921 --> 00:15:46,071
You must be from the escort service.
270
00:15:46,341 --> 00:15:51,911
The scenario is high
school wrestling match.
271
00:15:55,841 --> 00:15:59,581
- Hello?
- So get this: I lost Sandy Rivers.
272
00:15:59,581 --> 00:16:00,821
Funny you should mention that.
273
00:16:00,821 --> 00:16:04,201
It's almost midnight! What am
I gonna do,go on the air myself?
274
00:16:04,201 --> 00:16:07,611
Listen... Wait. Yeah,do that!
275
00:16:07,611 --> 00:16:09,231
No,I-I can't actually.
276
00:16:09,231 --> 00:16:12,031
Yes,you can. It's what you
really want and you deserve it.
277
00:16:12,031 --> 00:16:14,201
Kevin,that's not how it works.
278
00:16:14,201 --> 00:16:15,811
Sounds like that's your only choice.
279
00:16:15,811 --> 00:16:19,571
New York's a big city. Sandy
Rivers could be anywhere.
280
00:16:21,241 --> 00:16:24,541
And... wrestle!
281
00:16:27,781 --> 00:16:29,271
I'm sorry,baby.
282
00:16:29,271 --> 00:16:30,851
I just...
283
00:16:30,851 --> 00:16:33,801
I want our kid to believe
that the universe is magical.
284
00:16:33,801 --> 00:16:36,401
You know,like my dad taught me.
285
00:16:36,401 --> 00:16:38,071
You know what my dad taught me?
286
00:16:38,071 --> 00:16:41,091
Nothing... 'cause he was never there.
287
00:16:42,611 --> 00:16:46,891
"June 22nd,1996,Brooklyn,New York.
288
00:16:46,891 --> 00:16:50,071
"A man misses his daughter's
high school graduation.
289
00:16:50,071 --> 00:16:52,581
"Later,she discovers
her babysitting money "
290
00:16:52,581 --> 00:16:57,361
has been spent on a board game called
Who Stole The Babysitting Money?
291
00:16:57,361 --> 00:16:59,981
" He never saw the irony in that.
292
00:17:00,831 --> 00:17:03,801
"December 31st,2011.
293
00:17:03,801 --> 00:17:07,481
"A woman calls her father
to tell him she's pregnant.
294
00:17:07,481 --> 00:17:11,161
says,'Great. Thanks,'
and hangs up on her.
295
00:17:11,351 --> 00:17:13,991
" And after pushing her to call him,
296
00:17:13,991 --> 00:17:18,761
a Big Foot is discovered
in her husband's mouth.
297
00:17:19,461 --> 00:17:21,381
I'm glad you're a believer,baby,
298
00:17:21,381 --> 00:17:26,261
but I'm never gonna believe
in an "enigma of the mystical"
299
00:17:26,261 --> 00:17:29,481
unless I see it with my own eyes.
300
00:17:29,581 --> 00:17:33,641
Because the truth is,my father
never taught me believe in anything
301
00:17:33,641 --> 00:17:35,821
but myself.
302
00:17:36,421 --> 00:17:40,271
Well,if it helps at
all,I believe in you,too.
303
00:17:41,461 --> 00:17:44,231
Then there's a pretty
good chance I don't exist.
304
00:17:44,501 --> 00:17:46,671
How dare you?!
305
00:17:50,141 --> 00:17:51,381
Oh,my God!
306
00:17:51,381 --> 00:17:55,231
This is Robin Scherbatsky
filling in for Sandy Rivers.
307
00:17:55,231 --> 00:18:00,101
You know,America,tonight I've
been groped,stepped in puke
308
00:18:00,101 --> 00:18:05,101
and until 10 minutes ago had no idea
I would be on national television.
309
00:18:05,101 --> 00:18:06,131
That's my girl.
310
00:18:06,131 --> 00:18:08,471
But that's the magic of New Year's.
311
00:18:08,471 --> 00:18:12,081
When that clock strikes
midnight,we all get a fresh start.
312
00:18:12,081 --> 00:18:16,731
And I don't know about
you,but I could really use one.
313
00:18:16,731 --> 00:18:21,681
And that magic moment
starts in ten... nine...
314
00:18:21,681 --> 00:18:25,011
That night became a turning
point in Robin's career.
315
00:18:26,381 --> 00:18:29,391
{\a6}world***
316
00:18:27,761 --> 00:18:29,821
But we'll get to that.
317
00:18:31,181 --> 00:18:33,391
They're nice hats,Doug.
318
00:18:33,391 --> 00:18:36,271
They're wet but they're nice.
319
00:18:36,271 --> 00:18:38,871
...three,two,one.
320
00:18:42,741 --> 00:18:45,491
And that's the story of New Year's Eve.
321
00:18:45,491 --> 00:18:47,111
You know,I've been thinking that
322
00:18:47,111 --> 00:18:50,911
the reason I got so intense with
Lily about Enigmas of the Mystical
323
00:18:50,911 --> 00:18:52,311
is that,well...
324
00:18:52,311 --> 00:18:54,501
Could you pass the pickles?
325
00:18:56,461 --> 00:18:59,441
...with you gone,I feel
the mystical a little less.
326
00:18:59,441 --> 00:19:01,671
Can you hand me the chips?
327
00:19:01,671 --> 00:19:05,361
Sometimes I feel you a little less.
328
00:19:05,681 --> 00:19:08,511
That's why today was so
important because I just...
329
00:19:08,511 --> 00:19:10,271
I needed to...
330
00:19:13,461 --> 00:19:16,841
Did you just open a beer
on my father's headstone?
331
00:19:16,841 --> 00:19:18,531
Actually,it's a hard cider.
332
00:19:18,531 --> 00:19:20,691
And just as he was about to lose it...
333
00:19:20,691 --> 00:19:22,501
Hey,Marvin,can you pass me a burger?
334
00:19:22,501 --> 00:19:24,121
Hey,not Marvin. Marshall.
335
00:19:24,121 --> 00:19:27,571
Sorry,it's just,you're
so much like your pop.
336
00:19:27,571 --> 00:19:32,121
Your Uncle Marshall thought back to
all those tailgates with his father.
337
00:19:33,571 --> 00:19:36,051
- Hey,mind if I grab one?
- The more the merrier!
338
00:19:36,051 --> 00:19:37,711
All right.
339
00:19:38,031 --> 00:19:44,731
* The time has come to heal our wounds *
340
00:19:45,431 --> 00:19:51,911
* The time has come,it's
coming soon... *
341
00:19:51,911 --> 00:19:56,191
And he realized that maybe
private moments are overrated.
342
00:19:56,191 --> 00:19:57,841
You know what?
343
00:19:58,521 --> 00:20:00,491
The more the merrier.
344
00:20:02,081 --> 00:20:03,731
Hey,guys.
345
00:20:09,411 --> 00:20:12,351
- Happy New Year.
- Happy New Year.
346
00:20:14,931 --> 00:20:18,561
January 1st,2012,East Meadow,New York.
347
00:20:18,561 --> 00:20:22,451
A woman answers her door to find
something more enigmatic and mysterious
348
00:20:22,451 --> 00:20:25,291
than Bigfoot or the Loch Ness Monster.
349
00:20:25,291 --> 00:20:26,491
Dad?
350
00:20:27,271 --> 00:20:31,221
- I thought you were in Chicago.
- I was.
351
00:20:31,221 --> 00:20:33,741
Great. Thanks.
352
00:20:34,801 --> 00:20:38,441
My daughter's having a baby!
353
00:20:42,421 --> 00:20:45,961
- Did you drive all night?
- Yeah.
354
00:20:45,961 --> 00:20:48,591
Well,Teddy and I split the drive.
355
00:20:48,591 --> 00:20:51,291
This guy's a maniac behind the wheel.
356
00:20:53,041 --> 00:20:55,281
Congrats,Princess.
357
00:20:55,281 --> 00:20:59,531
-=http://bbs.sfile2012.com=-
-=http://ytet.org=-
Proudly Presents
358
00:20:59,531 --> 00:21:01,621
Happy New Year,Dad.
359
00:21:01,621 --> 00:21:06,371
-=http://bbs.sfile2012.com=-
-=http://ytet.org=-
Sync: 卡灰祝大家新年快乐
360
00:21:06,371 --> 00:21:08,651
How.I.Met.Your.Mother
S07E13
27635
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