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♪ ♪
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♪ ♪
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♪ ♪
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♪ Love, love ♪
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♪ Love, love ♪
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♪ Love, American Style ♪
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♪ Truer than the
red, white and blue ♪
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♪ Love, American Style ♪
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♪ That's me and you ♪
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♪ And on a star-spangled
night, my love ♪
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♪ You can rest ♪
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♪ You can rest your
head on my shoulder ♪
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♪ Or by the dawn's
early light, my love ♪
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♪ I will defend ♪
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♪ I will defend
your right to try ♪
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♪ Love, American Style ♪
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♪ That's me and you. ♪
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Tonight, you will see
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two separate views
of love, American style:
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fun and games in
a retirement village,
21
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and our first story
about a guy, his girl,
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and the man in her spare
bedroom, which we call:
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♪ Hey, I live to be out
with my baby at the night ♪
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♪ When the music seems to
play around... ♪ Eddie, Eddie.
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Will you stop? You'll
wake up the whole building.
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Well, they should be up.
It's only 1:00 in the morning.
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You're out of your head.
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Yeah, I'm also
a great date, too.
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Had a good time, didn't you?
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I spent enough dough.
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Dinner at the Candlelight Roof,
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off-Broadway
show, that's big stuff.
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Loved the Roof, hated the show.
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Why, what was wrong with it?
35
00:03:03,984 --> 00:03:05,962
Well, what's the point of
doing Hamlet in the nude?
36
00:03:05,986 --> 00:03:07,319
Well, plenty.
37
00:03:07,354 --> 00:03:10,222
It brings out new depth
in the meaning of the play.
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It emphasizes Hamlet's moral
dilemma and Ophelia's body.
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That's the point. Yeah.
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00:03:15,795 --> 00:03:19,164
Eddie, it has been a
marvelous evening.
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Yeah. Thanks.
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00:03:23,036 --> 00:03:24,970
Good night.
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How about a cup of coffee?
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All right.
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If you promise to
behave, it's late.
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Oh, Gloria, you know me.
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I know, I should
get it in writing.
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Boy, Gloria, you sure have
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a suspicious mind.
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00:03:39,486 --> 00:03:41,753
I would have it looked
into if I were you.
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Eddie, what
happened to the lights?
52
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Where are you?
53
00:04:37,210 --> 00:04:38,176
Here I am, honey.
54
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Right over here.
55
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Eddie Claypool, you put
those lights right back on.
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Well, I was only
thinking about you.
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After all, I know
what a struggle it is
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for a working girl to
pay the electric bill.
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I'd rather struggle
with the electric bill
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00:04:52,359 --> 00:04:53,525
than struggle with you.
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00:04:53,560 --> 00:04:56,127
Okay, okay, okay.
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I was only trying to create
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some atmosphere for the coffee.
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Atmosphere I like.
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00:05:01,334 --> 00:05:03,734
It's blackouts that worry me.
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00:05:03,770 --> 00:05:05,203
Gloria, sometimes I think
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you're the coldest
fish in Manhattan.
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00:05:07,274 --> 00:05:09,674
You know that's not true, Eddie.
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00:05:09,709 --> 00:05:12,710
But I do wish you'd
stop trying to rush things.
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00:05:12,745 --> 00:05:15,246
I'm an old-fashioned
girl from Tennessee.
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00:05:15,282 --> 00:05:19,718
I love old-fashioned
girls from Tennessee.
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Especially one.
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Really? Really.
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00:05:26,860 --> 00:05:28,560
Well, I guess there's no sense
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00:05:28,595 --> 00:05:30,529
in wasting
electricity after all.
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00:05:32,299 --> 00:05:34,232
Welcome to the big city.
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00:05:38,706 --> 00:05:40,738
Oh, no.
78
00:05:40,774 --> 00:05:42,240
Who could that be?
79
00:05:42,275 --> 00:05:45,743
Oh, it's probably Bill
Franklin from upstairs.
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00:05:45,778 --> 00:05:47,790
That's what I hate
about this building.
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00:05:47,814 --> 00:05:49,247
Everybody is so friendly.
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Any time they want
to, they drop in.
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I like it.
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It's sort of like Tennessee.
If you want to know
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the truth, it's more
like the post office.
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Hi, Gloria.
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Hi, Bill.
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I'm not interrupting, am I?
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00:06:01,127 --> 00:06:02,960
Oh, of course not.
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00:06:02,996 --> 00:06:04,196
Sit down.
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00:06:04,231 --> 00:06:06,164
Hi, it's Eddie, isn't it?
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00:06:07,401 --> 00:06:08,611
Would you like some coffee?
93
00:06:08,635 --> 00:06:09,734
Yeah, great.
94
00:06:09,769 --> 00:06:11,381
Have mine, haven't touched it.
95
00:06:11,405 --> 00:06:13,438
Cream and sugar.
No, no, no, thanks.
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00:06:15,175 --> 00:06:18,677
Mmm, man, that's coffee.
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00:06:18,712 --> 00:06:20,412
Eddie, if I could find a girl
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who could make coffee like this,
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I wouldn't let her go. Bill.
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00:06:23,517 --> 00:06:25,950
I'm just trying to
get you married off
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00:06:25,985 --> 00:06:28,153
before I'm tempted
to take the fatal step.
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00:06:28,188 --> 00:06:29,598
Another cup of
coffee might do it.
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00:06:31,124 --> 00:06:32,424
Look how late it's getting.
104
00:06:32,459 --> 00:06:33,869
Oh, that's too bad, I was hoping
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00:06:33,893 --> 00:06:35,871
we could get a chance to
talk, but if you've got to go.
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I don't have to go.
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00:06:37,865 --> 00:06:38,963
Great.
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00:06:38,999 --> 00:06:40,410
Say, did you have
a pleasant evening?
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Don't ask.
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Yeah, don't ask.
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00:06:42,503 --> 00:06:43,503
But since you have asked.
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Does red hair,
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00:06:46,239 --> 00:06:49,841
green eyes, 34-25-34
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00:06:49,877 --> 00:06:50,987
sound like a pleasant evening?
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It does for you.
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Laverne, isn't it?
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00:06:53,747 --> 00:06:55,079
No, no, Laverne was last week.
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This is Karen.
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Karen?
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00:06:58,285 --> 00:07:00,196
When did Karen enter your life?
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This afternoon,
in a phone booth.
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00:07:02,322 --> 00:07:03,533
In a phone booth?
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00:07:03,557 --> 00:07:05,957
Well, she couldn't
get her dime back.
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I stepped in to help,
the door got stuck...
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00:07:08,562 --> 00:07:09,894
You want to hear the rest?
126
00:07:09,929 --> 00:07:11,929
No, we don't want
to hear the rest.
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00:07:11,965 --> 00:07:13,931
Oh.
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00:07:13,967 --> 00:07:15,400
Oh, I get it.
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00:07:15,435 --> 00:07:16,568
You two want to be alone.
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00:07:16,603 --> 00:07:18,903
Huh? Well, I'll just
toddle off to bed then.
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00:07:18,938 --> 00:07:20,249
Good night, Eddie.
Good night, Gloria.
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00:07:20,273 --> 00:07:22,393
Good night. Good night, Bill.
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00:07:30,016 --> 00:07:31,215
Where's he going?
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To the spare room.
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00:07:34,455 --> 00:07:36,165
You mean he's going
to spend the night here?
136
00:07:36,189 --> 00:07:38,267
Yes. Oh, didn't I tell you?
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00:07:38,291 --> 00:07:40,269
His apartment's being painted.
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00:07:40,293 --> 00:07:41,893
I don't care if it's
been burned out.
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00:07:41,929 --> 00:07:43,361
He's not sleeping here tonight.
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00:07:43,396 --> 00:07:44,841
Quiet, Eddie, he'll hear you.
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00:07:44,865 --> 00:07:46,631
He better hear me
or he'll hear this.
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00:07:46,667 --> 00:07:49,601
Eddie, I'm surprised at you.
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00:07:49,636 --> 00:07:51,603
Oh...
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00:07:51,638 --> 00:07:53,338
You're surprised at me?
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00:07:53,373 --> 00:07:55,807
A strange man is going to
spend the night alone with you
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00:07:55,843 --> 00:07:58,075
in your apartment, and
you're surprised at me?
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00:07:59,412 --> 00:08:01,946
Bill isn't a strange man.
148
00:08:01,981 --> 00:08:04,059
He's an old friend, and besides,
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00:08:04,083 --> 00:08:06,028
you know there's nothing
going on between us.
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00:08:06,052 --> 00:08:07,084
As far as I'm concerned,
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00:08:07,120 --> 00:08:08,787
there's something
going on with that guy
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00:08:08,822 --> 00:08:10,555
and every single
girl in New York City.
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00:08:10,590 --> 00:08:12,957
The way I look at it,
he's a one man love-in.
154
00:08:12,992 --> 00:08:15,004
Oh, Bill just likes
to exaggerate.
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00:08:15,028 --> 00:08:16,127
Exaggerate?
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00:08:16,163 --> 00:08:18,796
Gloria, any man picks
up a girl in a phone booth
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00:08:18,831 --> 00:08:20,598
is a pretty slick customer.
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00:08:20,634 --> 00:08:23,201
He doesn't even use the
telephone, just the booth.
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00:08:23,236 --> 00:08:24,636
You can't allow a man like that
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to stay overnight
in your apartment.
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00:08:26,072 --> 00:08:28,317
Well, he isn't interested
in me in that way.
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00:08:28,341 --> 00:08:31,209
Besides, he's
sleeping in that room,
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00:08:31,244 --> 00:08:32,977
and I'm sleeping in my room,
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00:08:33,012 --> 00:08:34,023
and it's all very much
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00:08:34,047 --> 00:08:35,992
aboveboard and respectable.
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00:08:36,016 --> 00:08:37,415
It's about as respectable
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00:08:37,450 --> 00:08:39,117
as sending a rooster
to guard a henhouse.
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00:08:39,152 --> 00:08:41,452
Eddie, you are absolutely...
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00:08:42,890 --> 00:08:45,456
Don't let me interrupt
you lovebirds.
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00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:50,629
My group had ten
percent fewer cavities.
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00:08:53,700 --> 00:08:56,300
But then, we have
ten percent fewer teeth.
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00:09:01,307 --> 00:09:03,274
Funny, funny.
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00:09:03,309 --> 00:09:04,609
Don't be rude.
174
00:09:04,644 --> 00:09:06,377
Did you get a load
of those pajamas?
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00:09:06,412 --> 00:09:07,979
What about them?
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00:09:08,014 --> 00:09:10,381
Baby, you don't sleep
in pajamas like that.
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00:09:10,416 --> 00:09:11,816
He's better dressed
now than he was
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00:09:11,852 --> 00:09:13,250
when he came home from his date.
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00:09:13,286 --> 00:09:15,130
So he likes flashy pajamas.
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00:09:15,154 --> 00:09:16,588
And you know what
they're flashing?
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00:09:16,623 --> 00:09:18,556
Sex, sex, sex.
182
00:09:18,592 --> 00:09:21,459
Eddie, you have
got a one-track mind.
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00:09:21,495 --> 00:09:23,194
I've got a one-track mind?
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00:09:27,834 --> 00:09:29,300
Oh, yeah, well...
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00:09:29,335 --> 00:09:31,803
after all the action
I've had tonight.
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00:09:31,838 --> 00:09:34,305
You must admit it's been
a big, big evening for me.
187
00:09:34,340 --> 00:09:37,475
You've seen Hamlet in the
nude, Bill Franklin in his pajamas
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00:09:37,511 --> 00:09:39,188
and I haven't even
had my coat off.
189
00:09:39,212 --> 00:09:41,379
Will you stop
carrying on like this?
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00:09:42,682 --> 00:09:45,149
Nightie-night.
191
00:09:45,185 --> 00:09:46,785
Night, Bill.
192
00:09:53,060 --> 00:09:54,993
I made a boo-boo.
193
00:10:01,034 --> 00:10:04,202
You see, uh, upstairs
194
00:10:04,237 --> 00:10:06,104
I have the same apartment.
195
00:10:06,139 --> 00:10:09,674
So upstairs, that's my
bedroom and not Gloria's.
196
00:10:09,710 --> 00:10:11,743
And of course, down here,
197
00:10:11,778 --> 00:10:14,345
that's Gloria's
bedroom and not mine.
198
00:10:14,381 --> 00:10:16,514
It was just a...
199
00:10:16,549 --> 00:10:18,283
just an automatic reflex.
200
00:10:28,060 --> 00:10:29,994
Good night.
201
00:10:40,073 --> 00:10:41,039
Satisfied?
202
00:10:41,074 --> 00:10:42,707
What do you mean?
203
00:10:42,743 --> 00:10:45,309
It was his subconscious
that gave him away.
204
00:10:45,345 --> 00:10:46,544
He did exactly what
205
00:10:46,579 --> 00:10:47,979
was on his mind
without meaning to.
206
00:10:48,015 --> 00:10:51,082
Claypool that is the
most ridiculous analysis
207
00:10:51,117 --> 00:10:52,328
I have ever heard.
208
00:10:52,352 --> 00:10:54,631
It was a completely
honest mistake.
209
00:10:54,655 --> 00:10:56,866
And if I were you, I
wouldn't worry so much
210
00:10:56,890 --> 00:10:59,002
about everybody
else's subconscious,
211
00:10:59,026 --> 00:11:00,625
because from where I sit,
212
00:11:00,660 --> 00:11:02,505
your subconscious
should have its mouth
213
00:11:02,529 --> 00:11:04,161
washed out with soap.
214
00:11:04,197 --> 00:11:05,830
Ha-ha.
215
00:11:05,866 --> 00:11:07,665
Funny, but I'm
not going to let you
216
00:11:07,701 --> 00:11:09,501
joke your way out of this.
217
00:11:09,536 --> 00:11:11,970
Gloria Gilcrest, this is
sordid and you know it.
218
00:11:12,005 --> 00:11:14,372
Sordid? Yes.
219
00:11:14,407 --> 00:11:17,041
We don't know
one girl, one girl,
220
00:11:17,076 --> 00:11:19,577
that would allow a single,
casually acquainted male
221
00:11:19,613 --> 00:11:21,245
stay over in her apartment.
222
00:11:21,280 --> 00:11:23,425
Eddie, there isn't
one girl that wouldn't,
223
00:11:23,449 --> 00:11:25,628
and it would be
perfectly respectable.
224
00:11:25,652 --> 00:11:28,212
Your morals are prehistoric.
225
00:11:29,389 --> 00:11:31,188
Oh, yeah?
226
00:11:31,224 --> 00:11:34,492
Okay. I'm going
to call your bluff.
227
00:11:35,629 --> 00:11:37,461
You're what? Yeah.
228
00:11:37,497 --> 00:11:39,274
We're going to see how
willing some other girl is
229
00:11:39,298 --> 00:11:40,977
to share her apartment
with a strange man
230
00:11:41,001 --> 00:11:42,132
for the night.
231
00:11:42,168 --> 00:11:44,635
Yeah. How about Joyce Becker?
232
00:11:44,671 --> 00:11:46,704
Are you going to call Joyce now?
233
00:11:46,739 --> 00:11:48,138
Why not? She's a night owl.
234
00:11:48,174 --> 00:11:49,139
She'll still be up.
235
00:11:49,175 --> 00:11:51,709
All right, Joyce Becker.
236
00:11:51,744 --> 00:11:53,889
And you claim
that she'll allow me
237
00:11:53,913 --> 00:11:55,123
to stay in her
apartment overnight
238
00:11:55,147 --> 00:11:56,391
like you're letting
lover boy here?
239
00:11:56,415 --> 00:11:58,649
Yes. Okay, baby.
240
00:11:59,786 --> 00:12:01,229
You're in for some shock, honey.
241
00:12:01,253 --> 00:12:02,598
You better hold onto something
242
00:12:02,622 --> 00:12:05,182
'cause you're going
to fall flat on your face.
243
00:12:05,859 --> 00:12:08,359
You asked for it.
244
00:12:08,394 --> 00:12:10,160
Joyce, Eddie Claypool.
245
00:12:10,196 --> 00:12:12,262
Fine, fine.
246
00:12:12,298 --> 00:12:13,865
No, no, not too busy.
247
00:12:13,900 --> 00:12:15,544
Uh, listen, Joyce, uh...
248
00:12:15,568 --> 00:12:17,880
I'm sorry I had to call
you at this hour but...
249
00:12:17,904 --> 00:12:19,882
the fact is I have a problem.
250
00:12:19,906 --> 00:12:21,706
I've been locked out.
251
00:12:21,741 --> 00:12:23,207
Yeah, my apartment.
252
00:12:23,242 --> 00:12:24,687
Seems like I lost
the keys somewhere
253
00:12:24,711 --> 00:12:26,689
and the superintendent
doesn't live in the building.
254
00:12:26,713 --> 00:12:28,846
Yeah, it's really a drag.
255
00:12:28,882 --> 00:12:31,193
Oh, I was wondering, Joyce, uh,
256
00:12:31,217 --> 00:12:33,529
since I have no place
to sleep tonight, uh,
257
00:12:33,553 --> 00:12:36,687
do you think I could
stay at your place tonight?
258
00:12:36,723 --> 00:12:38,689
I can?
259
00:12:38,725 --> 00:12:41,692
You don't mind?
260
00:12:41,728 --> 00:12:43,372
What about your boyfriend, Hank?
261
00:12:43,396 --> 00:12:46,196
He'll mind, won't he?
262
00:12:46,232 --> 00:12:48,232
It's okay with him.
263
00:12:48,267 --> 00:12:50,902
Well, thank you, Joyce.
264
00:12:50,937 --> 00:12:52,236
Yeah.
265
00:12:52,271 --> 00:12:54,282
Well, listen, maybe
I'll find the keys.
266
00:12:54,306 --> 00:12:58,275
If I don't, your key will
be under the doormat.
267
00:12:58,310 --> 00:13:01,245
Yeah, well, uh, thanks again.
268
00:13:07,219 --> 00:13:09,186
Joyce Becker.
269
00:13:09,221 --> 00:13:11,188
What did I tell you?
270
00:13:11,223 --> 00:13:13,201
I could never get
a date with her.
271
00:13:13,225 --> 00:13:15,470
She was always going
steady with someone.
272
00:13:15,494 --> 00:13:16,972
Never occurred to me to call her
273
00:13:16,996 --> 00:13:18,841
and ask her if I
could spend the night.
274
00:13:18,865 --> 00:13:20,230
Not everybody in the world
275
00:13:20,266 --> 00:13:22,399
is as suspicious as you are.
276
00:13:22,435 --> 00:13:24,446
If Joyce Becker would
let me spend the night,
277
00:13:24,470 --> 00:13:27,104
then Linda Crabtree will
let me spend the night.
278
00:13:27,139 --> 00:13:29,451
Then there's Sandra Burton,
279
00:13:29,475 --> 00:13:31,442
Barbara Newhope.
280
00:13:31,477 --> 00:13:34,111
Oh, what are you doing?
281
00:13:34,146 --> 00:13:35,991
You know, if a fella
played this thing right,
282
00:13:36,015 --> 00:13:37,492
he wouldn't even have
to have an apartment.
283
00:13:37,516 --> 00:13:39,562
He could just have a
locker at the bus terminal.
284
00:13:39,586 --> 00:13:41,118
But you do have an apartment
285
00:13:41,153 --> 00:13:42,753
and you haven't lost your key,
286
00:13:42,789 --> 00:13:44,755
and it's not being painted.
287
00:13:44,791 --> 00:13:46,769
There's something
else you forgot.
288
00:13:46,793 --> 00:13:48,759
What's that?
289
00:13:48,795 --> 00:13:50,728
I got a girl I like pretty much.
290
00:13:53,099 --> 00:13:54,899
Hey, I'm sorry.
291
00:13:54,934 --> 00:13:56,211
Can you forgive me for making
292
00:13:56,235 --> 00:13:57,446
such a fool of myself tonight?
293
00:13:57,470 --> 00:13:59,436
You're forgiven.
294
00:13:59,472 --> 00:14:02,106
I guess I just had
some growing up to do.
295
00:14:02,141 --> 00:14:03,586
Don't we all? Yeah.
296
00:14:03,610 --> 00:14:04,753
Well,
297
00:14:04,777 --> 00:14:06,744
good night, kitten.
298
00:14:06,779 --> 00:14:08,079
Sleep tight.
299
00:14:08,114 --> 00:14:09,925
You too, darling. Like a log.
300
00:14:09,949 --> 00:14:11,927
He doesn't bother
me in the least now.
301
00:14:11,951 --> 00:14:13,417
He shouldn't.
302
00:14:13,452 --> 00:14:15,419
You're twice the man he is.
303
00:14:15,454 --> 00:14:17,421
Even without pajamas?
304
00:14:17,456 --> 00:14:19,389
Sorry about that.
305
00:14:26,032 --> 00:14:27,865
Gloria.
306
00:14:27,900 --> 00:14:29,366
No, Gloria.
307
00:14:31,838 --> 00:14:33,771
Gloria!
308
00:15:06,773 --> 00:15:08,606
Man, this is ridiculous.
309
00:15:08,641 --> 00:15:10,775
I don't know what
I'm doing to myself.
310
00:15:10,810 --> 00:15:13,477
I got to get some sleep.
311
00:15:18,517 --> 00:15:20,785
Hey, fella, you're
one for the books.
312
00:15:20,820 --> 00:15:22,264
Can't you get it
through your head
313
00:15:22,288 --> 00:15:24,421
that everything is all right?
314
00:15:24,457 --> 00:15:28,025
You're nothing but a suspicious,
paranoid, insecure jerk, right?
315
00:15:28,061 --> 00:15:29,304
Wrong.
316
00:15:29,328 --> 00:15:30,628
What?
317
00:15:30,663 --> 00:15:33,530
Remember Rosemary Curtis?
318
00:15:33,566 --> 00:15:34,799
Who?
319
00:15:34,834 --> 00:15:37,702
Mrs. Bailey's dancing class.
320
00:15:37,737 --> 00:15:39,336
Oh, yeah.
321
00:15:39,371 --> 00:15:41,138
Remember you told
her you loved her?
322
00:15:41,173 --> 00:15:44,008
And you bought her a
Fudgie Wudgie as a token?
323
00:15:44,043 --> 00:15:47,478
Who did you see polishing off
that Fudgie Wudgie after class?
324
00:15:47,513 --> 00:15:49,747
Elmer Guntzwiller.
325
00:15:49,782 --> 00:15:52,282
And he couldn't even dance.
326
00:15:52,318 --> 00:15:54,318
How about blonde Carol Matthews?
327
00:15:54,353 --> 00:15:56,320
Carol Matthews.
328
00:15:56,355 --> 00:15:57,989
Remember you went into the army
329
00:15:58,024 --> 00:16:00,724
and she promised to
wait forever and ever?
330
00:16:00,760 --> 00:16:02,638
And before you were
through with basic training,
331
00:16:02,662 --> 00:16:05,797
she was married, settled
down and expecting.
332
00:16:05,832 --> 00:16:08,399
All right, all right,
but Gloria's different.
333
00:16:08,434 --> 00:16:09,500
Sure she's different.
334
00:16:09,535 --> 00:16:11,235
She's got more
nerve than the others.
335
00:16:11,271 --> 00:16:12,536
She brings the other guy
336
00:16:12,571 --> 00:16:13,949
right into the
apartment for the night,
337
00:16:13,973 --> 00:16:16,473
and convinces you
that it might as well be
338
00:16:16,509 --> 00:16:19,076
the Bobbsey Twins
at Grandma's house.
339
00:16:19,112 --> 00:16:20,555
You mean something's going on?
340
00:16:23,950 --> 00:16:26,583
How long are you going to
be that naive, gullible chump
341
00:16:26,619 --> 00:16:28,552
that women love
to make a fool of?
342
00:16:28,587 --> 00:16:30,354
Of course something is going on.
343
00:16:30,389 --> 00:16:32,556
A sexy chick and a swinging guy
344
00:16:32,591 --> 00:16:35,059
in a pad for the night
and nothing's going on?
345
00:16:35,094 --> 00:16:37,328
Boy, sometimes you're so naive
346
00:16:37,363 --> 00:16:39,396
even I don't believe
it, and I'm you.
347
00:16:39,432 --> 00:16:42,533
Yeah, thought they could
put one over on me, huh?
348
00:16:42,568 --> 00:16:47,038
Well, I'll show her who's
the gullible, naive chump.
349
00:16:47,073 --> 00:16:48,405
Yes, sir, boy.
350
00:16:48,441 --> 00:16:50,007
That's it.
351
00:16:50,043 --> 00:16:52,676
That's the last time anybody
makes a patsy out of me.
352
00:16:52,712 --> 00:16:55,112
Boy, is she in for a surprise.
353
00:16:55,148 --> 00:16:57,915
Thought she'd make a fool
out of Eddie Claypool, huh?
354
00:16:57,951 --> 00:16:59,650
Well, he's wised up now.
355
00:16:59,685 --> 00:17:02,086
Thought she'd make
a sucker out of me.
356
00:17:02,121 --> 00:17:03,598
Well, I'll show her
who the sucker is.
357
00:17:03,622 --> 00:17:05,122
I'll show him, too.
358
00:17:05,158 --> 00:17:07,291
I didn't read that
karate book for nothing.
359
00:17:07,327 --> 00:17:10,394
Him and his fancy pajamas!
360
00:17:25,278 --> 00:17:27,778
Hey, turn that music down!
361
00:17:35,654 --> 00:17:40,357
It's 3:00. I better take
another sleeping pill.
362
00:18:08,087 --> 00:18:11,322
♪ ♪
363
00:18:55,868 --> 00:18:57,701
Coming.
364
00:18:57,736 --> 00:18:58,736
Who is it?
365
00:18:58,771 --> 00:18:59,771
Eddie! Eddie!
366
00:18:59,805 --> 00:19:00,849
Eddie?
367
00:19:00,873 --> 00:19:02,851
Okay, baby, okay,
baby, the jig is up.
368
00:19:02,875 --> 00:19:04,341
What jig?
369
00:19:04,377 --> 00:19:06,688
If you and Bill Franklin want
to play around behind my back,
370
00:19:06,712 --> 00:19:08,657
it's okay with me.
This is a free country.
371
00:19:08,681 --> 00:19:09,891
But I just want you to know
372
00:19:09,915 --> 00:19:11,482
that I know about it.
373
00:19:11,517 --> 00:19:14,418
Oh, Eddie, you were so sensible
when you left here this evening.
374
00:19:14,454 --> 00:19:16,198
I thought you were
all over this nonsense.
375
00:19:16,222 --> 00:19:17,588
What happened?
376
00:19:17,623 --> 00:19:19,190
I had a long talk with myself
377
00:19:19,225 --> 00:19:20,969
in the mirror, that's
what happened.
378
00:19:20,993 --> 00:19:22,626
You talked with
yourself in the mirror?
379
00:19:22,661 --> 00:19:25,074
Yeah, and that guy in
the mirror told me plenty.
380
00:19:25,098 --> 00:19:26,575
Oh, he did, huh? Yes, he did.
381
00:19:26,599 --> 00:19:29,633
Well, did he also tell you
382
00:19:29,668 --> 00:19:31,746
that you're the biggest
nut this side of the Rockies?
383
00:19:31,770 --> 00:19:34,049
And that if I wanted to start
something with Bill Franklin,
384
00:19:34,073 --> 00:19:36,151
I wouldn't bring him
in right in front of you?
385
00:19:36,175 --> 00:19:39,377
That I would at least
wait until you went home?
386
00:19:39,412 --> 00:19:41,712
And I would probably go
upstairs to his apartment
387
00:19:41,747 --> 00:19:44,081
instead of down here so
that there'd be less chance
388
00:19:44,117 --> 00:19:45,282
of being found out?
389
00:19:45,318 --> 00:19:47,051
No.
390
00:19:47,086 --> 00:19:48,386
And on top of that,
391
00:19:48,421 --> 00:19:49,887
didn't he tell you
392
00:19:49,922 --> 00:19:51,933
that I didn't want anything
to do with Bill Franklin?
393
00:19:51,957 --> 00:19:54,024
You don't?
394
00:19:55,794 --> 00:19:57,494
You mean you're not, uh...
395
00:19:57,529 --> 00:19:58,896
No!
396
00:19:58,931 --> 00:20:01,131
And he isn't...?
397
00:20:01,167 --> 00:20:03,467
No, but don't
take my word for it!
398
00:20:03,503 --> 00:20:06,603
I want you to see for yourself.
399
00:20:06,639 --> 00:20:08,039
It's all right, Gloria.
400
00:20:08,074 --> 00:20:09,573
I just lost control of myself.
401
00:20:09,608 --> 00:20:10,974
But I insist.
402
00:20:11,010 --> 00:20:12,388
Please, Gloria, I believe you.
403
00:20:12,412 --> 00:20:14,223
Oh, I wouldn't hear of you.
404
00:20:14,247 --> 00:20:15,924
I want you convinced
once and for all
405
00:20:15,948 --> 00:20:17,226
that there's nothing going on
406
00:20:17,250 --> 00:20:20,451
and then we'll all be
able to get some sleep.
407
00:20:20,486 --> 00:20:21,885
All right?
408
00:20:24,090 --> 00:20:25,989
All right.
409
00:20:30,663 --> 00:20:33,263
Are you satisfied?
410
00:20:33,299 --> 00:20:34,331
I didn't see anything.
411
00:20:34,367 --> 00:20:35,399
Exactly.
412
00:20:35,434 --> 00:20:36,478
Now if you'll just go home...
413
00:20:36,502 --> 00:20:37,767
Wait a minute, wait a minute.
414
00:20:37,803 --> 00:20:39,269
You wouldn't let
me see anything.
415
00:20:39,305 --> 00:20:41,016
What do you mean I
wouldn't let you see?
416
00:20:41,040 --> 00:20:42,750
I think there's something
going on in that bedroom.
417
00:20:42,774 --> 00:20:44,441
And I'm going to
find out what it is.
418
00:20:44,477 --> 00:20:45,742
But, Eddie, I can explain.
419
00:20:51,617 --> 00:20:52,950
There's nobody here.
420
00:20:52,985 --> 00:20:54,385
Well, there isn't?
421
00:20:54,420 --> 00:20:56,432
I mean, of course there isn't.
422
00:20:56,456 --> 00:20:59,016
That's what I wanted to explain.
423
00:21:05,731 --> 00:21:08,899
I don't know what to say.
424
00:21:08,934 --> 00:21:12,603
Well, you don't have
to say anything, Eddie.
425
00:21:12,638 --> 00:21:14,771
I never acted like this
with anyone before.
426
00:21:14,807 --> 00:21:16,873
You haven't?
427
00:21:16,909 --> 00:21:19,009
I never felt this way.
428
00:21:20,746 --> 00:21:22,346
You know something?
429
00:21:22,381 --> 00:21:24,381
I think I'm in love with you.
430
00:21:24,417 --> 00:21:26,950
Oh, Eddie.
431
00:21:32,691 --> 00:21:34,002
What are you doing
tomorrow night?
432
00:21:34,026 --> 00:21:36,104
Well, I have something
on, but I'll break it.
433
00:21:36,128 --> 00:21:37,094
Break it. Okay.
434
00:21:37,129 --> 00:21:38,562
I'll pick you up for dinner.
435
00:21:38,597 --> 00:21:40,831
I'll pick you up for cocktails,
then we'll have dinner.
436
00:21:40,866 --> 00:21:41,876
All right.
437
00:21:41,900 --> 00:21:43,745
What are you doing
for lunch? Lunch?
438
00:21:43,769 --> 00:21:45,414
Yeah, we'll have lunch,
cocktails and dinner.
439
00:21:45,438 --> 00:21:46,581
Anything you say, Eddie.
440
00:21:46,605 --> 00:21:48,605
Oh, I'm so glad I came
back here this evening.
441
00:21:48,640 --> 00:21:49,606
So am I.
442
00:21:49,641 --> 00:21:50,774
You know something?
443
00:21:50,810 --> 00:21:54,378
I should kind of talk to
myself more often, huh?
444
00:21:54,414 --> 00:21:56,714
Well, you get in bed,
because I want you to be
445
00:21:56,749 --> 00:21:58,960
bright-eyed and bushy-tailed
for breakfast in the morning.
446
00:21:58,984 --> 00:22:00,496
Breakfast? Yeah.
447
00:22:00,520 --> 00:22:02,586
I don't know what my
horoscope was for today,
448
00:22:02,622 --> 00:22:04,988
but whatever it was, I'm
going to have it framed.
449
00:22:06,592 --> 00:22:07,758
Good night.
450
00:22:07,794 --> 00:22:09,893
Good night, sweetheart.
451
00:22:23,509 --> 00:22:25,809
I'll just let myself out.
452
00:22:35,988 --> 00:22:38,333
So you see, there
was nothing to it at all.
453
00:22:38,357 --> 00:22:39,556
Not at all.
454
00:22:39,591 --> 00:22:41,136
I simply made the
same mistake again
455
00:22:41,160 --> 00:22:43,038
and all we were doing
was sleeping together.
456
00:22:43,062 --> 00:22:45,929
And when he says we
were sleeping together,
457
00:22:45,964 --> 00:22:48,365
he doesn't mean we
were sleeping together.
458
00:22:48,401 --> 00:22:49,411
Good heavens, no.
459
00:22:49,435 --> 00:22:53,237
He means we were
just... sleeping together.
460
00:22:53,272 --> 00:22:54,938
Gloria, I know what he means.
461
00:22:54,973 --> 00:22:56,740
I'm not a child.
462
00:22:56,775 --> 00:22:58,409
Friends?
463
00:23:01,647 --> 00:23:02,690
Good boy.
464
00:23:02,714 --> 00:23:04,159
You've got a real prince here.
465
00:23:04,183 --> 00:23:06,395
Well, I tell you, I
better get to bed
466
00:23:06,419 --> 00:23:08,430
or I won't even be
up for night court.
467
00:23:08,454 --> 00:23:10,220
Night, Gloria. Night, Bill.
468
00:23:14,326 --> 00:23:17,961
You really do
believe us, don't you?
469
00:23:17,996 --> 00:23:20,064
Of course I believe you.
470
00:23:20,099 --> 00:23:21,631
Nothing's changed between us?
471
00:23:21,667 --> 00:23:23,400
Nothing's changed.
472
00:23:23,436 --> 00:23:26,503
I'm glad. Because a
relationship like ours,
473
00:23:26,539 --> 00:23:29,173
without complete trust
wouldn't be worth a...
474
00:23:29,208 --> 00:23:32,242
Oh, honey, I trust
you, I do trust you.
475
00:23:32,278 --> 00:23:34,411
Oh, good.
476
00:23:34,447 --> 00:23:36,680
Now you go home
and get some sleep, too.
477
00:23:36,715 --> 00:23:38,549
Yeah.
478
00:23:38,584 --> 00:23:41,144
I'm finally going
to get some sleep.
479
00:23:42,821 --> 00:23:45,722
He's right, I do have a prince.
480
00:23:53,932 --> 00:23:55,332
Good night, darling.
481
00:23:55,368 --> 00:23:56,867
Good night, babe.
482
00:23:58,738 --> 00:24:00,504
You do trust me.
483
00:24:00,539 --> 00:24:02,439
Of course I trust you.
484
00:24:34,339 --> 00:24:37,307
♪ ♪
485
00:24:56,161 --> 00:24:58,495
Now I trust you.
486
00:25:11,310 --> 00:25:13,277
Lamar, you have to get over
487
00:25:13,312 --> 00:25:15,790
this terrible
inferiority complex.
488
00:25:15,814 --> 00:25:17,881
You are not that bad.
489
00:25:17,916 --> 00:25:19,449
Peggy, it's true.
490
00:25:19,485 --> 00:25:20,984
I'm just no good.
491
00:25:21,019 --> 00:25:23,086
Oh...
492
00:25:36,535 --> 00:25:40,170
I had to marry a scoutmaster.
493
00:26:19,311 --> 00:26:20,711
Ruthie!
494
00:26:20,746 --> 00:26:22,190
Granny.
495
00:26:22,214 --> 00:26:24,459
Oh, how wonderful to see you.
496
00:26:24,483 --> 00:26:26,528
How's Mother and Daddy?
497
00:26:26,552 --> 00:26:27,817
Oh, they're fine.
498
00:26:27,853 --> 00:26:29,764
Gosh, it's good to see you. Oh.
499
00:26:29,788 --> 00:26:30,920
How are you feeling?
500
00:26:30,956 --> 00:26:32,133
Oh, I'm just wonderful.
501
00:26:32,157 --> 00:26:33,457
Come on in.
502
00:26:34,727 --> 00:26:36,260
Let me look at you.
503
00:26:37,496 --> 00:26:39,429
Oh, I love that dress.
504
00:26:39,465 --> 00:26:40,830
Thank you.
505
00:26:40,866 --> 00:26:42,932
I wish I could wear
them that short,
506
00:26:42,968 --> 00:26:45,269
but my legs are too lumpy.
507
00:26:45,304 --> 00:26:46,436
That's what you get for
508
00:26:46,472 --> 00:26:48,305
standing on your
feet for 70 years.
509
00:26:49,508 --> 00:26:51,185
You know, I've
been wanting to come
510
00:26:51,209 --> 00:26:53,154
and see you for
such a long time.
511
00:26:53,178 --> 00:26:54,856
Today I just said, "This is it,"
512
00:26:54,880 --> 00:26:57,024
and I got in my
car and drove out.
513
00:26:57,048 --> 00:26:59,849
Oh, I'm so glad you did.
514
00:26:59,885 --> 00:27:02,264
Oh. You've got a great
looking place here, really.
515
00:27:02,288 --> 00:27:03,520
Wow.
516
00:27:03,555 --> 00:27:05,289
Are you getting along all right?
517
00:27:05,324 --> 00:27:06,456
Do you have friends?
518
00:27:06,492 --> 00:27:08,136
Are there things to do here?
519
00:27:08,160 --> 00:27:09,760
Why, my, yes, I'm fine.
520
00:27:09,795 --> 00:27:12,128
You don't need
to worry about me.
521
00:27:12,164 --> 00:27:14,364
Well, good. As long
as you're not lonely.
522
00:27:14,399 --> 00:27:15,632
Oh, no.
523
00:27:15,668 --> 00:27:16,867
Actually, it's fun.
524
00:27:16,902 --> 00:27:18,902
We have lots of fun here.
525
00:27:18,938 --> 00:27:20,737
You know what we call it?
526
00:27:20,773 --> 00:27:22,673
What? The campus.
527
00:27:22,708 --> 00:27:23,819
Really?
528
00:27:23,843 --> 00:27:24,975
'Course,
529
00:27:25,010 --> 00:27:26,944
some people call
it the boneyard,
530
00:27:26,979 --> 00:27:29,913
but there's always a
sourpuss in every crowd.
531
00:27:29,949 --> 00:27:32,594
Who are you talking
to in there, dear?
532
00:27:32,618 --> 00:27:35,018
Why, uh, it's my
granddaughter, Ruth.
533
00:27:35,053 --> 00:27:37,053
Are you thirsty, dear?
534
00:27:37,089 --> 00:27:38,822
Wouldn't you like a drink?
535
00:27:38,858 --> 00:27:40,156
You must be thirsty
536
00:27:40,192 --> 00:27:43,527
after that long ride out here.
537
00:27:43,562 --> 00:27:46,096
Okay, just a soft drink.
538
00:27:46,132 --> 00:27:49,232
Oh, well, I can give
you some mix, straight.
539
00:27:49,268 --> 00:27:50,801
Well, that'll be fine.
540
00:27:55,908 --> 00:27:58,007
Granny, who is that in there?
541
00:27:58,043 --> 00:28:00,243
Why, that's John.
542
00:28:00,278 --> 00:28:01,378
John?
543
00:28:01,413 --> 00:28:02,846
My husband.
544
00:28:02,881 --> 00:28:04,848
Your husband?
545
00:28:04,883 --> 00:28:06,516
Oh, Granny, how groovy!
546
00:28:06,552 --> 00:28:07,951
You're married.
547
00:28:07,987 --> 00:28:09,887
Yes. Didn't you know?
548
00:28:09,922 --> 00:28:10,620
No.
549
00:28:10,656 --> 00:28:13,657
Why, I wrote Ella.
550
00:28:13,693 --> 00:28:16,760
Well, I'm sure I did.
551
00:28:16,796 --> 00:28:18,896
Maybe I didn't.
552
00:28:18,931 --> 00:28:20,898
I don't know.
553
00:28:20,933 --> 00:28:22,265
But when?
554
00:28:22,300 --> 00:28:23,132
What?
555
00:28:23,168 --> 00:28:24,735
When did you get married?
556
00:28:24,770 --> 00:28:27,604
Oh, about six weeks ago.
557
00:28:27,639 --> 00:28:30,407
Uh, we went to Vegas.
558
00:28:30,442 --> 00:28:31,653
Well, hello there.
559
00:28:31,677 --> 00:28:32,976
So this is Ruth.
560
00:28:33,012 --> 00:28:35,023
Hi, Ruth. I'm
delighted to meet you.
561
00:28:35,047 --> 00:28:36,324
I'm John Carlson.
562
00:28:36,348 --> 00:28:39,316
Well, I'm pleased to
meet you, but my heavens,
563
00:28:39,351 --> 00:28:41,318
I didn't know a
thing about this.
564
00:28:41,353 --> 00:28:43,620
Well, I mean, congratulations.
565
00:28:43,655 --> 00:28:46,222
Congratulations?
566
00:28:46,257 --> 00:28:49,325
Uh, uh, Ruth didn't know
we were married, dear.
567
00:28:49,361 --> 00:28:51,840
Oh, so you didn't know, huh?
568
00:28:51,864 --> 00:28:53,407
Well, I see. Well...
569
00:28:53,431 --> 00:28:55,432
No, I didn't know
a thing about it.
570
00:28:55,467 --> 00:28:58,268
And I still don't understand
why you didn't let us know.
571
00:28:58,303 --> 00:29:01,872
Well, we meant to,
but you know how it is.
572
00:29:01,907 --> 00:29:04,508
Time just seems to float
by here on the campus.
573
00:29:04,543 --> 00:29:07,143
We didn't want to
make a big to-do
574
00:29:07,178 --> 00:29:08,345
about it.
575
00:29:08,380 --> 00:29:09,713
But, Granny, getting married?
576
00:29:09,749 --> 00:29:11,949
I'll get it.
577
00:29:13,619 --> 00:29:16,286
Gee, Granny, what
a great-looking guy.
578
00:29:16,321 --> 00:29:18,388
He is, isn't he?
579
00:29:18,423 --> 00:29:22,192
He's a little younger than
me, but he's very mature.
580
00:29:22,228 --> 00:29:24,205
Hello?
581
00:29:24,229 --> 00:29:27,097
Oh, well, we have an
unexpected guest here.
582
00:29:27,133 --> 00:29:29,644
And could you hold
on just a minute?
583
00:29:29,668 --> 00:29:30,801
It's George. You know,
584
00:29:30,836 --> 00:29:32,513
the starter at the
miniature golf course.
585
00:29:32,537 --> 00:29:34,704
He wants to know
if we're going to play
586
00:29:34,740 --> 00:29:35,705
our match.
587
00:29:35,741 --> 00:29:36,807
Oh, no!
588
00:29:36,842 --> 00:29:37,975
Ruth's here.
589
00:29:38,010 --> 00:29:39,609
Tell him we default.
590
00:29:39,645 --> 00:29:42,312
We're in the finals at the
tournament, but so what?
591
00:29:42,347 --> 00:29:43,847
Oh, no. Now, look,
592
00:29:43,883 --> 00:29:45,794
if you're in the finals,
why don't you play?
593
00:29:45,818 --> 00:29:47,350
I mean, how long will it take?
594
00:29:47,385 --> 00:29:49,719
Well, it shouldn't
take us more than, uh,
595
00:29:49,755 --> 00:29:51,455
20 minutes to polish him off,
596
00:29:51,490 --> 00:29:53,557
but we'd rather spend
the time with you.
597
00:29:53,592 --> 00:29:55,804
Oh, we'd much rather spend
the time with you, Ruthie.
598
00:29:55,828 --> 00:29:56,960
Oh, no.
599
00:29:56,995 --> 00:29:58,995
Now, you two play, I insist.
600
00:29:59,030 --> 00:30:00,464
Well, if you insist.
601
00:30:00,499 --> 00:30:02,332
We've been trying to get a match
602
00:30:02,367 --> 00:30:04,000
with these pigeons
for two weeks.
603
00:30:04,035 --> 00:30:06,470
We've got a side
bet of 75 cents.
604
00:30:06,505 --> 00:30:08,282
We'll be right there, George.
605
00:30:08,306 --> 00:30:09,851
If we're going, let's go.
606
00:30:09,875 --> 00:30:12,141
Well, now, Ruth,
you-you just wait here.
607
00:30:12,177 --> 00:30:13,710
It won't take us long, honest.
608
00:30:13,745 --> 00:30:16,446
Just relax.
609
00:30:16,482 --> 00:30:18,582
You better be hot, baby.
610
00:30:20,953 --> 00:30:22,218
We'll be right back, Ruthie.
611
00:30:22,253 --> 00:30:24,588
And if you get hungry,
look in the refrigerator.
612
00:30:24,623 --> 00:30:26,422
We've got plenty
of tapioca in there.
613
00:30:26,458 --> 00:30:27,702
Don't worry about me.
614
00:30:27,726 --> 00:30:29,771
You two take your
time and have fun.
615
00:30:29,795 --> 00:30:32,228
I'll be here.
616
00:30:32,263 --> 00:30:34,063
She seems very happy.
617
00:30:34,099 --> 00:30:35,932
He's such a nice man.
618
00:30:35,968 --> 00:30:37,567
John.
619
00:30:37,603 --> 00:30:41,270
Oh, no, no, he's
very bright and alert.
620
00:30:41,306 --> 00:30:42,572
Sure, I'll tell him.
621
00:30:42,608 --> 00:30:43,985
I know.
622
00:30:44,009 --> 00:30:45,274
I was pretty shocked myself.
623
00:30:45,310 --> 00:30:47,377
No, no, I think
I'll stay overnight
624
00:30:47,412 --> 00:30:48,945
and drive home in the morning.
625
00:30:50,148 --> 00:30:51,280
Oh, listen, Mom,
626
00:30:51,316 --> 00:30:52,861
there's somebody
at the door, though.
627
00:30:52,885 --> 00:30:54,050
I got to go.
628
00:30:54,085 --> 00:30:56,019
Okay. Bye-bye.
629
00:31:02,127 --> 00:31:03,860
Oh, hello. Hi.
630
00:31:03,896 --> 00:31:05,695
Where are the folks?
631
00:31:05,731 --> 00:31:07,608
Oh, they're over at the
miniature golf course.
632
00:31:07,632 --> 00:31:09,099
And who are you?
633
00:31:09,134 --> 00:31:10,867
I'm Ruth, Terry's granddaughter.
634
00:31:10,903 --> 00:31:13,270
Oh, Ruth. You just graduated
from Bennington, right?
635
00:31:14,539 --> 00:31:15,772
Right. How did you know?
636
00:31:15,807 --> 00:31:17,941
Well, she talks
about you all the time.
637
00:31:17,977 --> 00:31:19,609
You're a great-looking chick.
638
00:31:19,644 --> 00:31:21,544
I mean, she said
you were pretty,
639
00:31:21,580 --> 00:31:23,880
but, uh, well, sometimes
what's pretty to them...
640
00:31:23,916 --> 00:31:25,815
I know. Who are you?
641
00:31:25,851 --> 00:31:27,662
I'm Oliver Kingman,
the manager here.
642
00:31:27,686 --> 00:31:29,597
I've got their Social
Security checks.
643
00:31:29,621 --> 00:31:31,387
Oh, well, come on in. Thanks.
644
00:31:35,093 --> 00:31:36,671
Well, how's old Bennington?
645
00:31:36,695 --> 00:31:38,261
Oh, fine, I guess.
646
00:31:38,296 --> 00:31:39,629
Have you ever been up there?
647
00:31:39,665 --> 00:31:40,808
Sure, I went to Williams.
648
00:31:40,832 --> 00:31:42,465
You did? Yeah.
649
00:31:42,500 --> 00:31:43,933
Tell me, do they still have
650
00:31:43,969 --> 00:31:45,780
those great bashes at
Ernie's on Friday nights?
651
00:31:45,804 --> 00:31:49,039
Well, things have changed
pretty much since you were around.
652
00:31:49,074 --> 00:31:50,707
It's not so much groups anymore.
653
00:31:50,742 --> 00:31:51,708
People pair off now.
654
00:31:51,743 --> 00:31:52,842
It's more serious.
655
00:31:52,878 --> 00:31:55,145
And are you paired
off and more serious?
656
00:31:55,180 --> 00:31:57,580
Well, not at the moment.
657
00:31:59,051 --> 00:32:01,317
Well, do you like working here?
658
00:32:01,352 --> 00:32:03,620
Yes, very much.
659
00:32:03,655 --> 00:32:06,155
I get a real charge
out of these people.
660
00:32:06,191 --> 00:32:07,791
They call me the dean.
661
00:32:09,161 --> 00:32:10,928
Oh, of the campus.
662
00:32:10,963 --> 00:32:12,062
Yeah, right.
663
00:32:12,097 --> 00:32:13,763
Did Terry tell you about that?
664
00:32:13,799 --> 00:32:16,344
Uh-huh. Now listen, they're
a great bunch of people
665
00:32:16,368 --> 00:32:18,936
and they think I'm great
because I know what's going on.
666
00:32:18,971 --> 00:32:20,536
I've got all the gossip.
667
00:32:20,572 --> 00:32:23,673
I don't suppose there's too
much to gossip about around here.
668
00:32:23,709 --> 00:32:26,542
I don't know, you
might be surprised.
669
00:32:26,578 --> 00:32:31,481
I hate to leave, but I've got
some more checks to deliver.
670
00:32:31,516 --> 00:32:34,050
Let's see, his...
671
00:32:34,086 --> 00:32:35,585
and hers.
672
00:32:35,621 --> 00:32:37,141
See ya. Okay.
673
00:32:38,657 --> 00:32:40,735
Oh, I see the government
hasn't changed the name yet.
674
00:32:40,759 --> 00:32:42,025
What?
675
00:32:42,060 --> 00:32:44,327
Well, it's still made
out to Theresa Grant
676
00:32:44,362 --> 00:32:45,629
instead of Mrs. John Carlson.
677
00:32:45,664 --> 00:32:47,063
Oh.
678
00:32:47,099 --> 00:32:49,398
Well, you did know they
were married, didn't you?
679
00:32:49,434 --> 00:32:51,567
Well, actually, I...
680
00:32:51,603 --> 00:32:53,036
When did they get married?
681
00:32:53,071 --> 00:32:54,971
About six weeks ago.
682
00:32:55,007 --> 00:32:56,472
I thought you said
683
00:32:56,508 --> 00:33:00,076
you knew everything
that went on around here.
684
00:33:00,112 --> 00:33:02,411
Yes, well, they must have
been married on a Wednesday.
685
00:33:02,447 --> 00:33:03,658
You see, I'm off on Wednesdays.
686
00:33:03,682 --> 00:33:05,593
You know, you don't
sound very happy for them.
687
00:33:05,617 --> 00:33:07,250
Oh, of course I am.
688
00:33:07,285 --> 00:33:09,318
Tell them
congratulations for me.
689
00:33:09,354 --> 00:33:10,698
Well, tell me, didn't
they have a party
690
00:33:10,722 --> 00:33:12,266
or a celebration or anything?
691
00:33:12,290 --> 00:33:14,124
A party?
692
00:33:14,159 --> 00:33:16,325
Let's see, uh...
693
00:33:16,361 --> 00:33:17,560
Come to think of it,
694
00:33:17,595 --> 00:33:19,040
there was something
about six weeks ago.
695
00:33:19,064 --> 00:33:20,764
It was a lot of noise.
696
00:33:20,799 --> 00:33:22,699
They stayed up until about 8:30.
697
00:33:22,734 --> 00:33:24,600
That must have been it.
698
00:33:24,636 --> 00:33:26,269
Well, it's been real
nice meeting you.
699
00:33:26,304 --> 00:33:27,581
No, wait a minute.
700
00:33:27,605 --> 00:33:29,372
I don't understand this.
701
00:33:29,407 --> 00:33:31,719
You're the dean and you're
supposed to look after these people.
702
00:33:31,743 --> 00:33:33,387
How come you didn't
know they were married?
703
00:33:33,411 --> 00:33:35,411
I don't know. Maybe
I knew it and forgot.
704
00:33:35,446 --> 00:33:37,814
I mean, after all, what
difference does it make
705
00:33:37,849 --> 00:33:38,948
if they're married
706
00:33:38,984 --> 00:33:40,150
or they're not married?
707
00:33:40,185 --> 00:33:41,529
What difference does it make?
708
00:33:41,553 --> 00:33:43,731
Are you kidding? It makes
a lot of difference to me.
709
00:33:43,755 --> 00:33:44,821
It does?
710
00:33:44,856 --> 00:33:46,589
Well, of course it does.
711
00:33:46,624 --> 00:33:48,136
If they weren't
married, I'd feel awful.
712
00:33:48,160 --> 00:33:49,359
Why?
713
00:33:49,394 --> 00:33:50,671
What do you mean why?
714
00:33:50,695 --> 00:33:51,906
What if it was your grandmother?
715
00:33:51,930 --> 00:33:53,496
I wish it was my grandmother.
716
00:33:53,531 --> 00:33:54,664
Why?
717
00:33:54,699 --> 00:33:56,099
She's living with her daughter.
718
00:33:56,134 --> 00:33:58,801
Listen, are they married or not?
719
00:33:58,837 --> 00:34:00,803
You want me to level with you?
720
00:34:00,839 --> 00:34:02,483
Of course. They're not married.
721
00:34:02,507 --> 00:34:04,174
But why are they doing this?
722
00:34:04,209 --> 00:34:05,308
For $50.
723
00:34:05,344 --> 00:34:06,609
$50?
724
00:34:06,644 --> 00:34:08,245
Sure.
725
00:34:08,280 --> 00:34:10,881
Look, they get $150
apiece from the government
726
00:34:10,916 --> 00:34:12,282
if they're single.
727
00:34:12,317 --> 00:34:14,251
That's $300 total.
728
00:34:14,286 --> 00:34:17,254
But if they're married,
they only get about $250.
729
00:34:17,289 --> 00:34:19,189
They lose $50.
730
00:34:19,224 --> 00:34:21,624
That's why they're not married.
731
00:34:21,659 --> 00:34:24,660
Are you trying to tell me
that my grandmother...
732
00:34:24,696 --> 00:34:26,262
For $50... right.
733
00:34:26,297 --> 00:34:27,697
A month.
734
00:34:27,732 --> 00:34:31,134
Well, excuse me, would you?
735
00:34:31,169 --> 00:34:32,668
I've got a headache.
736
00:34:32,704 --> 00:34:33,937
Oh, really?
737
00:34:33,972 --> 00:34:35,616
Well, listen, I've got all
kinds of pills in my office.
738
00:34:35,640 --> 00:34:38,307
Oh, no. No, thank you.
739
00:34:38,343 --> 00:34:39,442
I'd rather be alone.
740
00:34:39,477 --> 00:34:41,477
Oh, sure.
741
00:34:41,512 --> 00:34:43,446
Are you going to
be around later?
742
00:34:43,481 --> 00:34:44,680
Maybe we could have dinner.
743
00:34:44,716 --> 00:34:47,817
Oh, I don't know
right now. I'll see.
744
00:34:47,853 --> 00:34:50,653
Okay. Good-bye, Ruth.
745
00:34:50,688 --> 00:34:52,588
Good-bye.
746
00:34:57,362 --> 00:34:59,295
Here come the champs!
747
00:34:59,330 --> 00:35:00,563
We won, Ruthie!
748
00:35:00,598 --> 00:35:01,865
We won!
749
00:35:01,900 --> 00:35:03,778
That's nice, Granny, I'm glad.
750
00:35:03,802 --> 00:35:05,379
Oh, you should have been there.
751
00:35:05,403 --> 00:35:07,570
We were down two
going in to the turn,
752
00:35:07,605 --> 00:35:09,638
and then we made our move.
753
00:35:09,675 --> 00:35:13,876
Oh, Agnes really choked up
on that windmill play, didn't she?
754
00:35:13,912 --> 00:35:15,756
Her hand shook just like that.
755
00:35:15,780 --> 00:35:17,481
Oh, that was
because of her palsy.
756
00:35:17,516 --> 00:35:19,827
Oh, palsy my foot.
It was the pressure.
757
00:35:19,851 --> 00:35:21,351
It got to her.
758
00:35:21,386 --> 00:35:25,589
And then, on number 18,
old Fred was so nervous,
759
00:35:25,624 --> 00:35:27,824
he was puffing
like a steam engine.
760
00:35:27,859 --> 00:35:29,426
That was his asthma.
761
00:35:29,461 --> 00:35:32,562
And then John had
about a 20-footer.
762
00:35:32,597 --> 00:35:34,342
He was behind
the tire, you know,
763
00:35:34,366 --> 00:35:37,233
and he hit it against
the cement wall,
764
00:35:37,269 --> 00:35:38,568
through the coffee can,
765
00:35:38,603 --> 00:35:41,204
over the waterfall
and he sunk it.
766
00:35:41,239 --> 00:35:43,139
He sunk it!
767
00:35:43,175 --> 00:35:44,607
Oh, what a shock.
768
00:35:44,642 --> 00:35:46,943
I was so proud of you, love.
769
00:35:46,979 --> 00:35:48,511
Thank you, Terry.
770
00:35:48,546 --> 00:35:50,858
Well, I'm glad you won and
had such a nice time, Granny.
771
00:35:50,882 --> 00:35:52,460
But I'm afraid I've
got to be going.
772
00:35:52,484 --> 00:35:54,217
What? Go? Oh?
773
00:35:54,252 --> 00:35:55,485
Yes.
774
00:35:55,520 --> 00:35:56,719
Why, but you can't go now.
775
00:35:56,754 --> 00:35:59,389
We're going to fill
this thing with beer
776
00:35:59,424 --> 00:36:01,135
and have some
beans and hot dogs,
777
00:36:01,159 --> 00:36:02,937
and a lot of the
neighbors are coming over.
778
00:36:02,961 --> 00:36:04,405
We're going to
have a little party.
779
00:36:04,429 --> 00:36:05,895
We're going to have a ball.
780
00:36:05,930 --> 00:36:07,908
Well, I'm sorry,
but it's getting late
781
00:36:07,932 --> 00:36:09,643
and I don't want to
drive when it's dark.
782
00:36:09,667 --> 00:36:11,934
Oh, my.
783
00:36:11,970 --> 00:36:14,415
We thought you were
going to stay over night.
784
00:36:14,439 --> 00:36:17,607
Well, we never would have
gone to play if we'd known.
785
00:36:17,642 --> 00:36:19,620
Well, then we've got plenty
of room haven't we, John?
786
00:36:19,644 --> 00:36:21,044
You bet!
787
00:36:21,079 --> 00:36:23,157
You see, this couch turns
into a very comfortable bed,
788
00:36:23,181 --> 00:36:24,447
and you can bunk in that.
789
00:36:24,483 --> 00:36:26,615
Oh, no, no, I
wouldn't think of it.
790
00:36:26,651 --> 00:36:28,618
Well, we do it all the time.
791
00:36:28,654 --> 00:36:30,164
Lots of times the
Johnsons come over
792
00:36:30,188 --> 00:36:34,157
to play a fast game of whist
and it gets too late for Carl.
793
00:36:34,193 --> 00:36:36,003
He has night
blindness, you know.
794
00:36:36,027 --> 00:36:37,160
So they just sleep here.
795
00:36:37,196 --> 00:36:38,294
We don't mind a bit.
796
00:36:38,330 --> 00:36:39,562
No trouble at all.
797
00:36:39,597 --> 00:36:41,264
Well, that's very kind of you,
798
00:36:41,299 --> 00:36:43,432
but I've really got to be going.
799
00:36:43,468 --> 00:36:45,001
Now, Ruthie,
800
00:36:45,036 --> 00:36:47,203
I'm sure you didn't
come all the way out here
801
00:36:47,239 --> 00:36:49,105
just to turn around and go back.
802
00:36:49,141 --> 00:36:50,273
Now, what's the matter?
803
00:36:50,308 --> 00:36:51,974
Don't you feel well?
804
00:36:52,010 --> 00:36:53,776
Oh, no, I'm fine.
805
00:36:53,811 --> 00:36:56,179
I just wanted to see
you and I have seen you
806
00:36:56,214 --> 00:36:57,581
and everything's fine, so...
807
00:36:57,616 --> 00:36:59,516
Ruthie.
808
00:36:59,551 --> 00:37:01,817
I think I'm going to
get out of these duds
809
00:37:01,853 --> 00:37:03,186
and into my drinking clothes.
810
00:37:03,221 --> 00:37:05,188
If you ladies will excuse me.
811
00:37:05,223 --> 00:37:07,257
Ruthie.
812
00:37:07,292 --> 00:37:09,659
What's the matter?
813
00:37:09,694 --> 00:37:12,395
We haven't done anything
to upset you, have we, dear?
814
00:37:12,431 --> 00:37:13,729
Oh, no, no.
815
00:37:13,765 --> 00:37:16,166
I just want to beat
the traffic, that's all.
816
00:37:16,201 --> 00:37:17,833
Well, good-bye, Granny.
817
00:37:17,869 --> 00:37:19,335
Oh, and your checks came.
818
00:37:19,371 --> 00:37:20,736
They're on the table.
819
00:37:20,772 --> 00:37:22,439
Oh, now wait a minute.
820
00:37:22,474 --> 00:37:24,018
Mr. Kingman brought the checks?
821
00:37:24,042 --> 00:37:26,008
Yes, he did. Well...
822
00:37:26,044 --> 00:37:29,079
Uh, did you talk to him at all?
823
00:37:29,114 --> 00:37:30,813
We had a little talk.
824
00:37:30,848 --> 00:37:34,451
Did he say anything to
you about John and me?
825
00:37:34,486 --> 00:37:36,886
No, nothing in particular.
826
00:37:36,921 --> 00:37:39,155
Ruthie...
827
00:37:39,191 --> 00:37:41,458
look at me.
828
00:37:41,493 --> 00:37:44,060
I can always tell
when you're lying.
829
00:37:44,096 --> 00:37:46,407
I remember when you
brought that little garter snake
830
00:37:46,431 --> 00:37:49,099
into your room
and said you didn't.
831
00:37:49,134 --> 00:37:52,535
Now come on, sit down,
832
00:37:52,571 --> 00:37:55,838
tell me all about it.
833
00:37:55,873 --> 00:38:00,243
You had this little
talk with Mr. Kingman
834
00:38:00,278 --> 00:38:02,044
and he told you what?
835
00:38:02,080 --> 00:38:04,214
Oh, Granny, look, it's
none of my business.
836
00:38:04,249 --> 00:38:05,748
What you do is your business.
837
00:38:05,783 --> 00:38:06,927
Now, none of that.
838
00:38:06,951 --> 00:38:08,484
It is too your business.
839
00:38:08,519 --> 00:38:10,519
We love each other.
840
00:38:10,555 --> 00:38:13,256
Well, I guess I just
wasn't prepared.
841
00:38:13,291 --> 00:38:15,258
I wish you'd told me the truth.
842
00:38:15,293 --> 00:38:18,060
About John and me
not being married?
843
00:38:18,096 --> 00:38:19,496
Yes.
844
00:38:19,531 --> 00:38:20,863
Why are you doing it?
845
00:38:20,898 --> 00:38:23,732
For $50 a month, Ruthie.
846
00:38:23,768 --> 00:38:25,602
Well, that's what
Mr. Kingman said,
847
00:38:25,637 --> 00:38:28,338
but I would have been happy
to give you the extra $50,
848
00:38:28,373 --> 00:38:30,807
or the family would
have been glad to.
849
00:38:30,842 --> 00:38:33,443
I've never taken anything
from the family yet,
850
00:38:33,478 --> 00:38:35,745
and I don't intend to start now.
851
00:38:35,781 --> 00:38:37,681
Maybe someday I'll have to.
852
00:38:37,716 --> 00:38:39,282
But I don't have to yet.
853
00:38:39,317 --> 00:38:42,285
But, Granny, what'll I tell
them when I go back home?
854
00:38:42,320 --> 00:38:45,922
Well, tell them you saw me,
855
00:38:45,957 --> 00:38:49,526
I look good and I'm
living with this nice man.
856
00:38:49,561 --> 00:38:52,261
Oh, Granny, they
won't understand.
857
00:38:52,297 --> 00:38:55,031
Well, then... tell
them I'm married.
858
00:38:55,066 --> 00:38:57,066
They'll understand that.
859
00:38:57,101 --> 00:39:01,070
You understood it until that
bigmouth Kingman came along.
860
00:39:01,105 --> 00:39:02,706
But that's a lie.
861
00:39:02,741 --> 00:39:04,641
Well, then...
862
00:39:04,676 --> 00:39:07,043
tell them that I'm
living with John,
863
00:39:07,078 --> 00:39:08,845
or tell them I'm married.
864
00:39:08,880 --> 00:39:10,658
Whatever you think
the traffic will bear.
865
00:39:10,682 --> 00:39:12,415
Oh, I don't know.
866
00:39:12,450 --> 00:39:14,384
I'm all mixed up.
867
00:39:14,419 --> 00:39:17,620
You know, I've always thought
of you in a very special way.
868
00:39:17,656 --> 00:39:20,056
Like I remember when we
used to come and visit you
869
00:39:20,091 --> 00:39:21,335
when you had that little house
870
00:39:21,359 --> 00:39:22,637
out in the country
on Thanksgiving.
871
00:39:22,661 --> 00:39:25,228
I was a perfect
little grandmother.
872
00:39:25,263 --> 00:39:26,929
You were, Granny, you were.
873
00:39:26,964 --> 00:39:29,632
And you put me on a pedestal.
874
00:39:29,668 --> 00:39:31,867
Maybe.
875
00:39:31,903 --> 00:39:36,772
It gets mighty cold and
lonely on a pedestal.
876
00:39:36,808 --> 00:39:42,311
But it's nice and warm and
cozy in bed with a man you love.
877
00:39:42,347 --> 00:39:44,981
Well, Granny, look,
you were the one
878
00:39:45,016 --> 00:39:47,484
that taught me everything I
know about right and wrong.
879
00:39:47,519 --> 00:39:49,419
What do you think about
what you're doing now?
880
00:39:49,454 --> 00:39:52,288
I think it's right, or I
wouldn't be doing it.
881
00:39:52,323 --> 00:39:55,425
Well, what if I did it?
882
00:39:55,460 --> 00:39:57,727
Well, that'd be wrong, I guess.
883
00:39:57,763 --> 00:39:59,495
Why?
884
00:39:59,531 --> 00:40:02,998
Because you don't need
the $50 a month and we do.
885
00:40:04,536 --> 00:40:06,735
Oh, I don't know.
886
00:40:06,771 --> 00:40:09,439
If you want to blame anybody,
blame the government.
887
00:40:09,474 --> 00:40:12,841
They're penalizing
companionship.
888
00:40:12,877 --> 00:40:15,644
Well, did you convince
her to stay, Terry?
889
00:40:15,680 --> 00:40:16,979
Well, I don't know.
890
00:40:17,014 --> 00:40:18,414
Have I?
891
00:40:20,385 --> 00:40:24,587
John, Ruth knows about us.
892
00:40:24,622 --> 00:40:26,855
Oh, she does?
893
00:40:26,891 --> 00:40:30,326
Well, what do you think, Ruth?
894
00:40:30,361 --> 00:40:33,663
She doesn't like it.
895
00:40:33,698 --> 00:40:35,831
Oh, she doesn't.
896
00:40:35,867 --> 00:40:38,735
That's a shame.
897
00:40:38,770 --> 00:40:41,437
Maybe we ought to have
a little gin fizz or something.
898
00:40:43,941 --> 00:40:47,410
Oh, Ruthie, honey.
899
00:40:47,445 --> 00:40:50,879
Excuse me, Granny, I'm sorry.
900
00:40:50,915 --> 00:40:53,816
You really feel bad
about this, don't you?
901
00:40:53,851 --> 00:40:55,585
I do, I can't help it.
902
00:41:00,592 --> 00:41:03,270
Let me have a word with
you alone, John. Sure.
903
00:41:03,294 --> 00:41:06,362
Excuse us a minute,
please, Ruth, huh?
904
00:41:23,949 --> 00:41:25,147
Yes?
905
00:41:25,183 --> 00:41:27,116
Oh, you must be Ruthie.
906
00:41:27,151 --> 00:41:28,718
Well, come in, everybody.
907
00:41:28,753 --> 00:41:30,164
Meet Terry's granddaughter.
908
00:41:30,188 --> 00:41:32,522
I'm Martha Wilson. Hello.
909
00:41:32,557 --> 00:41:34,101
Yes, I'm George Callis. Hi.
910
00:41:34,125 --> 00:41:36,726
I'm Alice McCloud.
911
00:41:36,761 --> 00:41:39,696
Grace Talley. I've heard
a lot about you. Thank you.
912
00:41:39,731 --> 00:41:42,198
Fred Donahue, glad to know you.
913
00:41:42,233 --> 00:41:43,533
Ruthie, Ruthie, by the way,
914
00:41:43,568 --> 00:41:45,234
where's the kids?
915
00:41:45,269 --> 00:41:46,603
Oh, you mean John and Terry?
916
00:41:46,638 --> 00:41:47,638
Yeah.
917
00:41:47,672 --> 00:41:49,806
Well, they're in the bedroom.
918
00:41:49,841 --> 00:41:52,119
Well, bless their hearts.
919
00:41:52,143 --> 00:41:54,243
Oh, hello everybody.
920
00:41:57,415 --> 00:41:59,716
We sure are proud of you.
921
00:41:59,751 --> 00:42:00,861
Thanks, thanks.
922
00:42:00,885 --> 00:42:02,985
Now listen, everybody.
923
00:42:03,020 --> 00:42:04,987
We have a little
announcement to make.
924
00:42:05,022 --> 00:42:06,856
Now, go ahead, Terry.
925
00:42:06,891 --> 00:42:10,059
Yes, well, it's just...
926
00:42:10,094 --> 00:42:12,795
John and I have
decided to get married.
927
00:42:14,866 --> 00:42:17,367
Oh, Granny, that's terrific.
928
00:42:17,402 --> 00:42:19,079
Well, why are you
going to do that?
929
00:42:19,103 --> 00:42:21,070
You'll lose 50 bucks!
930
00:42:21,105 --> 00:42:22,550
Well, never mind about that.
931
00:42:22,574 --> 00:42:24,507
We've decided
we're going to do it.
932
00:42:24,542 --> 00:42:25,708
We're going to get married.
933
00:42:25,744 --> 00:42:29,078
The kids. Yes, the children...
934
00:42:29,113 --> 00:42:34,350
Oh, Granny and John,
I'm so happy for you both.
935
00:42:42,327 --> 00:42:44,827
Oh, and I want to invite
all their close friends
936
00:42:44,862 --> 00:42:46,995
and as many relatives
as I can round up.
937
00:42:47,031 --> 00:42:50,099
We need a large table
and some folding chairs.
938
00:42:50,134 --> 00:42:51,934
Think you can arrange all that?
939
00:42:51,969 --> 00:42:53,302
Yeah, I can arrange it.
940
00:42:53,338 --> 00:42:55,082
Oh, and can you get
the justice of the peace?
941
00:42:55,106 --> 00:42:56,672
Sure.
942
00:42:56,708 --> 00:42:59,152
Oh, yeah, and I better
get the flower girl,
943
00:42:59,176 --> 00:43:01,744
Mabel Jackson, she's 92.
944
00:43:01,779 --> 00:43:04,146
You know, I don't
dig your attitude.
945
00:43:04,181 --> 00:43:06,616
You sound like you don't
want them to get married.
946
00:43:06,651 --> 00:43:09,084
It doesn't thrill me much.
947
00:43:09,120 --> 00:43:10,886
How about some coffee?
948
00:43:10,921 --> 00:43:12,821
Well, why not?
949
00:43:12,857 --> 00:43:16,058
Hey, Ruth, forgive
me for being personal,
950
00:43:16,093 --> 00:43:18,961
but I got you figured
as being pretty hip.
951
00:43:18,996 --> 00:43:20,763
Am I wrong?
952
00:43:20,798 --> 00:43:22,030
Well, I've been around.
953
00:43:22,066 --> 00:43:23,566
I'm not a little girl anymore.
954
00:43:23,601 --> 00:43:24,945
Well, neither is
your grandmother.
955
00:43:24,969 --> 00:43:27,603
What's wrong with
them getting married?
956
00:43:27,639 --> 00:43:29,305
What's wrong?
957
00:43:29,340 --> 00:43:31,173
I'll tell you.
958
00:43:31,208 --> 00:43:33,287
They're playing golf
three times a week now.
959
00:43:33,311 --> 00:43:34,889
If they get married,
they'll play once
960
00:43:34,913 --> 00:43:37,212
or maybe not at all.
961
00:43:37,248 --> 00:43:39,848
And John likes a good cigar
every once in a while, too.
962
00:43:39,884 --> 00:43:42,752
And when that ice cream truck
comes around in the afternoon,
963
00:43:42,787 --> 00:43:44,287
they each get a Nutty Fudge.
964
00:43:44,322 --> 00:43:47,990
They're going to have to
cut down on these things, too.
965
00:43:48,025 --> 00:43:50,926
Now I know that newlyweds
have to live on tight budgets...
966
00:43:50,961 --> 00:43:52,995
But they won't have
to give up anything.
967
00:43:53,030 --> 00:43:55,230
The family will make up the $50.
968
00:43:55,266 --> 00:43:57,166
Oh, please.
969
00:43:57,201 --> 00:43:58,967
Please, don't do that.
970
00:43:59,003 --> 00:44:00,402
Don't start sending them money.
971
00:44:00,438 --> 00:44:01,537
Why not?
972
00:44:01,572 --> 00:44:02,939
Because, now they're people.
973
00:44:02,974 --> 00:44:04,507
Don't turn them into dependents.
974
00:44:04,542 --> 00:44:08,844
Well, maybe they will
have to give up a little.
975
00:44:08,880 --> 00:44:10,512
But they'll be gaining a lot.
976
00:44:10,548 --> 00:44:11,647
Like what?
977
00:44:11,682 --> 00:44:13,415
Their self-respect.
978
00:44:13,451 --> 00:44:14,951
When the family
comes to visit them,
979
00:44:14,986 --> 00:44:17,753
they won't have to
lie and conceal things.
980
00:44:17,789 --> 00:44:22,024
Ruth, your grandmother has
lived here for three months.
981
00:44:22,059 --> 00:44:24,694
Do you know how many visitors
she's had from the outside?
982
00:44:24,729 --> 00:44:26,261
Two,
983
00:44:26,297 --> 00:44:28,397
you and the plot salesman.
984
00:44:28,432 --> 00:44:31,400
Oh, well, uh...
985
00:44:31,435 --> 00:44:33,595
Well, everyone's been
very busy lately, but...
986
00:44:34,438 --> 00:44:37,306
I'm sure from now on,
she'll have lots of visitors.
987
00:44:37,341 --> 00:44:38,552
Boloney.
988
00:44:38,576 --> 00:44:40,476
These people are on their own.
989
00:44:40,512 --> 00:44:42,189
They've got to
make it themselves.
990
00:44:42,213 --> 00:44:44,079
And the happy ones do.
991
00:44:44,115 --> 00:44:46,026
The ones that sit around
in their rocking chairs,
992
00:44:46,050 --> 00:44:47,862
waiting for their children or
grandchildren to visit them,
993
00:44:47,886 --> 00:44:49,184
might as well be dead.
994
00:44:49,220 --> 00:44:51,787
Well, what do you want me
to do, just leave them alone?
995
00:44:51,823 --> 00:44:53,567
Say, "Granny, do
whatever you want.
996
00:44:53,591 --> 00:44:54,831
"Sleep with whomever you like.
997
00:44:54,859 --> 00:44:56,537
Whatever you do
is okay with me"?
998
00:44:56,561 --> 00:44:58,694
Well, I don't think
you have to worry
999
00:44:58,730 --> 00:45:00,696
about her becoming promiscuous.
1000
00:45:00,732 --> 00:45:02,799
Do you think that
just because she's old,
1001
00:45:02,834 --> 00:45:05,112
she doesn't have to care about
what people think anymore?
1002
00:45:05,136 --> 00:45:07,636
If people's opinion of her
1003
00:45:07,672 --> 00:45:09,839
depends upon whether
she's married or not,
1004
00:45:09,874 --> 00:45:11,373
she's led a pretty wasted life.
1005
00:45:11,409 --> 00:45:12,708
Oh, look,
1006
00:45:12,744 --> 00:45:15,878
let's just cut out all
this fencing, all right?
1007
00:45:15,913 --> 00:45:18,481
I mean, are you going to help
arrange the wedding or not?
1008
00:45:18,516 --> 00:45:20,949
Yeah, I'm going to help.
1009
00:45:20,985 --> 00:45:23,652
Listen, did you talk over
these arrangements with them?
1010
00:45:23,688 --> 00:45:25,254
No.
1011
00:45:25,289 --> 00:45:27,234
Well, I suggest we
talk it over with them.
1012
00:45:27,258 --> 00:45:29,892
I mean, after all, it's
probably their last wedding.
1013
00:45:29,927 --> 00:45:31,026
You're right.
1014
00:45:31,061 --> 00:45:32,728
I was getting a
little carried away.
1015
00:45:32,764 --> 00:45:35,141
Come on, let's take a walk
over to the house, huh?
1016
00:45:35,165 --> 00:45:36,331
Okay.
1017
00:45:41,005 --> 00:45:43,539
Start on those, folks.
1018
00:45:43,574 --> 00:45:46,976
There's more cooking and the
beans will be hot in a minute.
1019
00:45:47,011 --> 00:45:49,145
I hope these hot
dogs are tender.
1020
00:45:49,180 --> 00:45:51,914
I'm breaking in a
new set of dentures.
1021
00:45:51,950 --> 00:45:53,716
Well, no beans for me.
1022
00:45:53,751 --> 00:45:55,462
They're bad for my arteries.
1023
00:45:55,486 --> 00:45:58,321
Oh, Freddie, how about
some badminton tomorrow?
1024
00:45:58,356 --> 00:45:59,521
No, not tomorrow.
1025
00:45:59,557 --> 00:46:02,158
I'm picking up a sports
car in the morning.
1026
00:46:02,193 --> 00:46:04,894
Have a ball, everybody.
1027
00:46:04,929 --> 00:46:10,032
Oh, say, say, I heard that this
week's movie was rated "X."
1028
00:46:10,068 --> 00:46:13,970
Good, them "G"
movies put me to sleep.
1029
00:46:14,005 --> 00:46:16,605
Hi, everybody. Hi.
1030
00:46:16,640 --> 00:46:18,607
Hi, there. Hi.
1031
00:46:18,642 --> 00:46:21,155
Granny, could I talk
to you for a minute?
1032
00:46:21,179 --> 00:46:22,511
Oh, sure.
1033
00:46:22,546 --> 00:46:23,924
Excuse me for a minute, folks.
1034
00:46:23,948 --> 00:46:25,848
Yeah, sure.
1035
00:46:25,883 --> 00:46:28,784
How about a couple of
nice hot dogs for you two?
1036
00:46:28,820 --> 00:46:30,285
Oh, no, thanks, Granny.
1037
00:46:30,321 --> 00:46:32,361
Listen, I've been
talking to Mr. Kingman,
1038
00:46:32,389 --> 00:46:34,267
and he says that he
can arrange everything.
1039
00:46:34,291 --> 00:46:35,569
Arrange everything
for what, dear?
1040
00:46:35,593 --> 00:46:36,637
For the wedding.
1041
00:46:36,661 --> 00:46:38,639
I thought maybe we
could have it next Sunday,
1042
00:46:38,663 --> 00:46:39,807
a week from tomorrow.
1043
00:46:39,831 --> 00:46:41,341
Oh, I know it's
short notice, but...
1044
00:46:41,365 --> 00:46:44,266
No, forget it Ruth.
1045
00:46:44,301 --> 00:46:45,980
There ain't going
to be any wedding.
1046
00:46:46,004 --> 00:46:47,336
What?
1047
00:46:47,371 --> 00:46:49,105
No, John and I talked it over.
1048
00:46:49,140 --> 00:46:50,640
I just can't do it to him.
1049
00:46:50,675 --> 00:46:52,074
He'd have to give up too much.
1050
00:46:52,110 --> 00:46:54,242
You mean like his
miniature golf games?
1051
00:46:54,278 --> 00:46:55,845
Yeah, right.
1052
00:46:55,880 --> 00:46:57,680
And the Nutty Fudge bars.
1053
00:46:57,715 --> 00:47:00,049
You know, he just lives
for that ice cream truck.
1054
00:47:00,084 --> 00:47:02,518
When he hears those bells play
1055
00:47:02,553 --> 00:47:05,721
"Tiptoe Through the
Tulips," his face just lights up.
1056
00:47:05,757 --> 00:47:08,624
Well, then what
are you going to do?
1057
00:47:08,659 --> 00:47:12,161
Well, we thought we'd split up.
1058
00:47:12,196 --> 00:47:13,663
I don't want to hurt him,
1059
00:47:13,698 --> 00:47:15,665
and I can't hurt
you either, Ruthie.
1060
00:47:17,568 --> 00:47:20,402
It's been fun while it's
lasted, but it's over now.
1061
00:47:20,437 --> 00:47:22,716
You mean you'll each
live in your own place?
1062
00:47:22,740 --> 00:47:24,974
No, no, I'm going to
pull out completely.
1063
00:47:25,009 --> 00:47:28,678
If I stayed around here, the
temptation might be too great.
1064
00:47:28,713 --> 00:47:30,758
First windy night, we'd
probably get together
1065
00:47:30,782 --> 00:47:33,448
and the whole thing
would start all over.
1066
00:47:33,484 --> 00:47:35,885
How about the beans, Terry?
1067
00:47:35,920 --> 00:47:37,352
They're all set.
1068
00:47:37,388 --> 00:47:39,655
John, I told them
about what we decided.
1069
00:47:39,690 --> 00:47:41,090
Oh, you did?
1070
00:47:41,125 --> 00:47:42,858
Well, I was willing
to go through with it,
1071
00:47:42,894 --> 00:47:44,060
but she wouldn't do it.
1072
00:47:44,095 --> 00:47:46,595
What will you do now,
Terry? Where will you go?
1073
00:47:46,631 --> 00:47:48,597
Well, I don't know.
1074
00:47:48,633 --> 00:47:50,611
I thought maybe I'd
go down to San Diego
1075
00:47:50,635 --> 00:47:52,179
and move in with
my sister, Doris.
1076
00:47:52,203 --> 00:47:54,436
Doris?
1077
00:47:54,471 --> 00:47:56,683
Granny, you've never been
able to get along with Doris.
1078
00:47:56,707 --> 00:47:58,107
You'd be miserable.
1079
00:47:58,142 --> 00:48:00,676
At least I'd be
leading a clean life.
1080
00:48:00,712 --> 00:48:02,656
Nobody would have
to be ashamed of me.
1081
00:48:02,680 --> 00:48:05,614
Oh, no, look, you can't do that.
1082
00:48:05,649 --> 00:48:07,316
Oh, I feel terrible.
1083
00:48:07,351 --> 00:48:09,391
I feel like I'm ruining
both your lives.
1084
00:48:10,888 --> 00:48:13,856
Listen, Granny,
forget everything I said.
1085
00:48:13,892 --> 00:48:15,324
I was just being stupid.
1086
00:48:15,360 --> 00:48:16,959
I've got no right to...
1087
00:48:16,995 --> 00:48:19,039
I mean, you two dig each other,
1088
00:48:19,063 --> 00:48:20,707
and you're right for each other.
1089
00:48:20,731 --> 00:48:23,365
Look, I'm leaving.
1090
00:48:23,400 --> 00:48:25,212
So, please, just
forget everything I said.
1091
00:48:25,236 --> 00:48:26,736
The best thing I can do
1092
00:48:26,771 --> 00:48:29,772
is to just get out and
leave you two alone.
1093
00:48:29,807 --> 00:48:32,608
Oh, Ruthie, honey,
please don't go.
1094
00:48:32,643 --> 00:48:36,511
Oh, no, I'm going before
I do any more damage.
1095
00:48:36,547 --> 00:48:37,791
But I'll be back, and soon.
1096
00:48:37,815 --> 00:48:39,493
And don't worry, Granny,
1097
00:48:39,517 --> 00:48:41,183
about anything.
1098
00:48:41,219 --> 00:48:42,785
Ruthie.
1099
00:48:42,820 --> 00:48:45,454
Oh, just be happy,
Granny, that's all I want.
1100
00:48:49,160 --> 00:48:51,660
Good-bye, Granny.
1101
00:48:51,695 --> 00:48:53,362
Good-bye, John. Bye.
1102
00:48:53,398 --> 00:48:55,164
Best of luck to both of you.
1103
00:48:55,199 --> 00:48:57,759
Wait, Ruth. I'll
walk out with you.
1104
00:48:59,870 --> 00:49:03,572
Terry, I think he
really likes her.
1105
00:49:03,607 --> 00:49:06,242
Well, she's a nice looking girl.
1106
00:49:06,277 --> 00:49:08,610
All she needs is
to loosen up a little.
1107
00:49:08,646 --> 00:49:10,947
Say, we'd better get out
there and tell the folks.
1108
00:49:10,982 --> 00:49:12,315
They're waiting. That's right.
1109
00:49:12,350 --> 00:49:14,516
Yes, that's right, we better.
1110
00:49:14,552 --> 00:49:15,796
Listen, listen, folks,
1111
00:49:15,820 --> 00:49:18,720
we have a little
announcement to make.
1112
00:49:18,756 --> 00:49:21,068
We're not getting
married after all.
1113
00:49:21,092 --> 00:49:23,058
Oh, congratulations.
1114
00:49:23,094 --> 00:49:26,128
Ruth bought the whole story.
1115
00:49:26,163 --> 00:49:30,265
She always was a sucker
for one of Granny's fairy tales.
1116
00:50:08,439 --> 00:50:10,372
♪ ♪
1117
00:50:24,588 --> 00:50:27,089
Let's see...
1118
00:50:27,124 --> 00:50:30,359
Radishes might look good there.
1119
00:50:30,394 --> 00:50:32,328
Oh...
1120
00:50:32,363 --> 00:50:34,296
Open your mouth.
1121
00:50:34,332 --> 00:50:36,698
I think I'll try
some carrots there.
1122
00:50:39,837 --> 00:50:43,305
Your chest is ideal for onions.
1123
00:50:46,043 --> 00:50:49,378
She treats him just like dirt.
78326
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