All language subtitles for T A O O a H S01E31 Night School 1080p AMZN WEB-DL AAC2 0 H 264-WhatsBeyond (1)_track3_[eng]

- Hi, everybody.

I'm Harriet Nelson.

I certainly have a lot of
leisure time these mornings.

Our Hotpoint washer and
dryer save a lot of time.

Save a lot of money, too.

- Ah, very good.

- Where'd you come from?

- Oh, I get around.

- Hotpoint Quality
Appliances present

America's favorite family
comedy, "The Adventures

of Ozzie and Harriet,"
starring the entire Nelson

family, Ozzie, Harriet,
David, and Ricky.

- Yes, here we all are.

Out in the kitchen.

It's breakfast time,
as you can see.

That's me, Harriet, back
there bustling around.

And, of course, those
other three guys

represent the male contingent
of the Nelson household--

Ozzie, David, and Ricky.

Ozzie looks as if he's
just gotten an inspiration.

- Hey, I just got
an inspiration.

Why don't we go
on a picnic today?

How about it, Harriet?

- Oh, I'm afraid I can't.

- Oh, sure you can.

Come on, it would
be a lot of fun.

You pack a few sandwiches
and find some wooded glade

near a cool mountain spring.

I'll hold your hand and
whisper tender words

the way I used to up
in Springdale Park.

- Well, that's very romantic,
dear, except for one thing.

You never took me
to Springdale Park.

- I didn't?

Oh, well, then it must
have been some other--

Some other park.

- Boy, you're really living
dangerously now, Pop.

- Well, how about the picnic?

Come on, what do you say?

- Oh, I'd love to, dear, but
I have too much work to do.

I'll be happy to pack a lunch
for you and the boys, though.

- Well, what do you say, fellas?

- Well, gee, I'm sorry, Pop.

I promised to help a friend
of mine with some homework.

- Oh, that's kind
of strange, David.

It's usually a struggle to get
you to do your own homework.

- Well, this is a pretty
good friend of mine.

- Yeah, a pretty cute one, too.

- Oh, is this a girl?

- I'll say.

Her name is Margie--

- OK, Walter Winchell.

Nobody's asking you.

- Nobody has to.

I see all, hear all,
know all, and blab all.

- OK, Ricky.

You say you promised
to help this girl

with her homework, David?

- Yes, sir.

I told her I'd help her
with her chemistry notebook.

- Oh.

Well, Rick, looks like
it's up to you and me

to go on the picnic together.

- Gee, Pop, Iggy Schwartz
and I were supposed

to go to the movies today.

- Well, Ricky, you don't want
to sit in a stuffy theater

on a beautiful day like today.

- It's an awful
good picture, Pop.

- Oh, gee, I know.

Well, you folks
aren't in, so it looks

as though I'll have to go
on the picnic all by myself.

- Ooh, careful, dear,
you're spilling the coffee.

- Oh, well, this darn
table is so shaky.

- I know.

The leg's broken.

Remember?

You promised to fix it for me.

- Oh, yes.

I'll fix it.

Why don't you just put
a little less coffee

in the cup, Harriet.

And then when the table shakes,
it won't spill into the saucer.

- Oh, now that's
a clever solution.

That's much more practical
than fixing the table leg.

- OK, I promise
you, I'll fix it.

But I don't want to
waste a beautiful day

like this, Harriet.

Come on, can't I coax you
go to the picnic with me?

- No, I'm sorry, dear.

It's very tempting,
but I really can't go.

- Well, gee, can't
you help this girl

with her chemistry
notebook tomorrow, David?

- Well, gee, Pop.

I promised to help her
today, and I don't want

her to get any madder at me.

- Well, is she mad at you now?

- No, but I kind of think she
will be when she finds out

I don't even take chemistry.

- How about you, Rick?

- Well, Iggy's kind
of depending on me

to go to the movies
with him, Pop.

- Well, looks as
if I'll have to--

- As you see, Ozzie
tried his best,

but somehow he couldn't get
any takers in the kitchen.

However, if you
know Ozzie, you know

Ozzily doesn't give up
easily, or something.

So next we find him
out in the backyard,

approaching his good friend and
neighbor, Thorny, better known

as Don DeFore.

Or should I say better
known as Thorny?

At any rate, Thorny has
some surprising news

to convey to Oz.

No wonder he has those
carpentry tools with him.

- I'm going to night school now.

- Ah.

What do you have to do,
build your own desk?

- Nah, nah, no.

I'm taking woodcraft.

And boy, you should see the
terrific new lathe I've got.

It is a honey.

And that motor too.

It's a 1/4 horsepower, belt
drive, 1750 rpm, 110 volts--

- Say, wait a minute,
there's just a possibility

that Thorny may talk
Ozzie into something.

- Well, tonight's
my fourth night.

And believe me,
Oz, it's wonderful.

You know, I never
realized there was

so much of my spare
time I was wasting.

Why, I'm learning to
make a lot of things

now that I'm saving a
lot of good money on.

Now, you take that
salad fork for instance.

It'd cost you about a dollar
and a half down at the emporium.

- Yes, I must admit, Thorny
soon convinced Ozzie.

And so my fond husband
strolled back into the house

to sell me on his new idea.

- Uh, Harriet?

- What is it, dear?

- I-- I want to talk
to you about something.

- What'd you say?
Excuse me.

- Uh--

- Oh, thank you, dear.

I was just about
finished with it anyway.

- Oh.

Well, I was just thinking
about the way we waste so much

of our time.

- Yes, you may be right.

- Well, of course, I wouldn't
worry too much about it

because, after all, we're
not the only ones who

fritter our lives away
with carefree pleasures.

- Well, I'm glad
to hear that, dear.

Would you hand me that carefree
rag and that happy furniture

polish?
- Oh.

- Woodshopping with his
lathe and his tools.

Thorny's learning
something useful.

He's looking forward to
the future, progressing,

building, working--

- Of course, he warmed up
to the subject gradually.

But I know him pretty well,
so about 10 minutes later, I

caught on.

Are you trying to tell
me that you'd like

to go to night school, too?

- Well, I think I kind of would.

Would you mind?

- Well, I think it'd be a
wonderful idea If you took up

woodcraft, maybe you'd
fix that table leg for me.

- Are you kidding?

I'll set up a
workshop in the garage

and make you an
entire new table.

- A new leg will be just fine.

So after a little more
of this carefree banter,

we found ourselves
down at the high school

to register for the
adult night classes.

- Is this where we register for
the adult education courses?

- Yes, it is.

Would you like to enroll?

- Yes, my wife and I both would.

- Oh, how nice.

Have you decided on the
courses you'd like to take?

- Well, yes.

I think I'd like
to take psychology

and advanced knitting.

- Oh, that's an
interesting choice.

- And have you decided, too?

- Yes, I think I'd like
to tackle that woodcraft,

you know, the
fixing of table legs

and the making of the salad
forks with mayonnaise on them?

- Oh, how about
something else too?

Here's the list.

- Oh, thank you.

Let's see.

Woodcraft, I've already
decided on that.

Say, how would you like to
have me read to you in French?

That's a very pretty language.

Or should I say, a "langauge"?

That is pretty, dear.

- All right, I think
I'll try that, then,

the wood crafts and the French.

Is that OK?

- Oh, yes.

French is such a beautiful
language, so colorful.

You know, they say
French is supposed

to be the language of love.

- Well, I'm principally
interested in the wood crafts.

The French is just incidental.

- Somehow, a man
who speaks French

has that certain debonair
quality about him.

Suave, sort of dangerous.

Well, yes, as I say,
I am principally

interested in the wood crafts.

The French is-- you say
"the language of love"?

- Yes.

Frenchmen have that
certain charm about them.

Women just can't
seem to resist them.

- Well, as I say, I'm going
to devote most of my time

to the wood crafts.

I'm thinking about doing a
lot of zings around zee house.

- Like fixing zee table leg?

- Oh!

Cheri, zee table leg,
she will be fixed.

What are you laughing at?

- I was just thinking how funny
our kitchen table is going

to look with a Louis XIV leg.

- Hey, what's going on in here?

- Shhh, Mom and
Pop are studying.

They're going to night school.

- Do they have to?

- Heck, no.

They're just doing it for fun.

- Gee, that sun must've been
hotter than it felt today.

- Ricky, please, we're
trying to concentrate here.

La plume est sur la table.

- What the heck is that?

- That's French.

I'm studying French.

- Your father is
studying French,

and I'm taking psychology.

- Where was I?

- Something about the plums.

- Plums?

La plume-- la plume
est sur la table.

La plume est sur la table.

La plume est sur la table.

- La plume est sure la table.

- La plume est sur la table.

- La plume est sur la table.
- Oui.

- La plume est sur la table.

- Ozzie and Harriet will
be back in just a moment.

- Each evening at
precisely 7 o'clock,

Ozzie and I hurry out the door
with books under our arms.

Come on, Oz.

No time for that.

You'll be late.

There we go.

At about 10:30, we return.

In case this sounds
a bit mysterious,

let me explain it to you.

We've been attending special
adult classes at night school.

Ozzie labors at
woodcraft and French,

while I work on
knitting and psychology.

Each progressing, each
learning, each advancing.

After our first night, Ozzie
came home a better Frenchman

by one sentence.

- La plume est sur la table.

- I had the start of a
pair of argyle socks,

and Ozzie had a table leg
well under construction.

Two nights passed.

Our education went on.

Ozzie began to speak
French quite fluently.

- La plume est sur la table.

- I had the start of a
pair of argyle socks,

and Ozzie had a table leg
well under construction.

A week goes by.

By now, one would take
Ozzie for a native of Paris.

Poised, assured, as
he glibly recites--

- La plume est sur la table.

- I had the start of a--

Yes.

And Ozzie had a--

Yes.

- Still working on
your psychology?

- Well, I'm struggling with it.

It's pretty confusing.

- Oh?

What does it say?

Maybe I can explain it to you.

- "The symptom of
actual neurosis

is frequently the
incipient stage

of the psychoneurotic system.

The connection is observable
between neurasthenia

and conversion
hysteria, and also

between hypochondria
and paraphrenia."

- La plume est sur la table.

- Can't you learn to say
anything besides that one word?

- Well, Harriet, it's
not just one word.

It's an entire sentence.

La plume est sur la--

Yes, dear, I--

I've heard it.

It's about the only thing I
have heard for the past week.

What does it mean?

- Oh, it means, "the
pen is on the table."

- Wish you'd spend a little
more time on woodcraft.

- Well, don't you
like my French?

- Well, yes, dear, but
in your native tongue,

la broken leg is sur la table.

- Well, I was going to
save it as a surprise,

but I might as
well tell you now.

I'm making an entire new
leg for the kitchen table.

- Really?

- Yeah, as a matter of fact,
this is the second one.

I finished one the
other day, but I

had a little accident with it.

- Oh, what happened?

- Well, after I finished, I
noticed it was a little too

wide, too thick.

And so I figured I'd
put it on the lathe

and sort of shave
it down a little.

So I shaved it a little bit.

And then, I shaved
a little more.

And then I put it on the
lathe again and turned it

and shaved it a little more.

Wanted to make sure it
was just the right width,

and so then I shaved
it a little more.

And I turned it and
shaved it a little more,

and the darn thing disappeared.

How are you doing
with your knitting?

- Oh, pretty good.

Knitting a little
surprise for you.

- Oh, wonderful.

What is it?

- Oh, I can't tell you.

It's a surprise.

- Aw.

- You know, I'm really
proud of you, dear.

I didn't think this educational
urge would last more

than three or four days, and
here it's been a week now.

- Oh, I'm enjoying myself.

It's a wonderful way to
spend your spare time.

- Yeah, the Dunkels had a
wonderful party last night.

- Oh, yeah, I heard about that.

I understand Mary
Dunkel made one

of those big delicious chocolate
pies she makes so well.

- Mm-hmm.

Thorny told me.

- You know, speaking
of Thorny, I

haven't seen him down at that
night school since we started.

Oh, yes, he stopped
by one evening

to see if he could
borrow my bowling ball.

- I heard they
played party games

and they had a dance contest.

Gee, I bet they had fun.

- Aw, well, let them
stuff themselves

with sandwiches and cake.

Let them play their silly games.

I just can't wait to see the
expression on their faces

when I come in there spouting
French like a native.

Oh, well, back to the old books.

La plume est sur la table.

- Hi, boys.

- Hi, Mom.

- You fellas better wash up.

Dinner's just about ready.

- You and Pop going to night
school again tonight, Mom?

- Oh, sure.

We wouldn't miss school.

- I wouldn't miss it either.

Even if I didn't have
to go for a whole year,

I wouldn't miss it.

- Well, high school's
very interesting, Ricky.

- You learn anything yet, Mom?

- Oh sure, I've learned a lot.

- Like what?

- Well, for one thing,
I've learned I can't knit.

- I thought you were knitting
pop a pair of argyle socks.

- Well, I was trying to.

I follow the
instructions, but somehow

the heel always turns out
to be longer than the toe.

- Maybe you've just been
studying too hard, Mom.

You know, it's not
good too study to hard.

- Yeah, David's right, Mom.

I bet you just need a good rest.

- Well, it has been
quite a while since I've

spent a quiet evening at home.

- How about a quiet
evening at the movies?

- Yes, it's been quite a while
since I've been to a movie,

too.

- Well, there's a swell picture
playing at the Bijou, Mom.

- Yeah, it's very
quiet and restful,

real soothing to the nerves.

- What's the name of it?

- "Jet Bomber."

- Yes, I can see where that
would be very soothing.

- Come on, Mom.

We'll even treat you.

- Yeah, be our guest, Mom.

- Well, I must admit
that I'm tempted.

But how would I explain
this to your father?

- Well just explain
it the way Ricky

and I explain these things.

- How is that?

- Just don't say
anything about it.

- I'd be playing
hooky, you know.

- Oh, if you're
worried about that,

we'll write a note
to your teacher.

- Yeah, and I'll even sign it.

- Well--

- Come on, Mom.

"Jet Bomber" sounds
like a swell picture.

- Yeah, come on, Mom.

- All right, men.

Prepare for Operation Hooky.

Our target for tonight
is the Bijou Theater.

- Thanks a lot, Mom.

- But remember, now,
not a word about this

to General de Gaulle.

- Oh hi, Mr. Nelson.

- Oh, hello there, Emmy Lou.

- I just heard about your
going back to school.

And I want you to
know that I think

it's wonderful, just wonderful.

- Oh, thanks a lot.

- What are you studying?

Engineering, architecture,
chemistry, medicine?

- Uh, French.

Say something in
French, Mr Nelson.

- Uh, uh, what type of thing?

- Something romantic.

- Well, la plume
est sur la table.

Mr. Nelson!

- Donne-moi la plume.

Mr. Nelson!

What does it mean?

- It means "the pen
is on the table.

Give me the pen."

- Oh, that's so cultured and
European and cosmopolitan.

- Yeah, the only thing
though, I find it's

awfully difficult to
work into a conversation.

Very, very difficult.

- Doesn't it thrill you to go
back to school again though?

- Uh, can you keep
a secret Emmy Lou?

- I don't know until I find
out if it's worth telling.

- Well, frankly, I'm just bored
stiff with the whole idea.

I mean, ever since I
enrolled in this darn course,

I haven't even had a chance
to get out of the house.

I haven't seen a
moving picture show.

I haven't had a
chance to go bowling.

I haven't been to
a lodge meeting.

Even at home, I haven't had
a chance to watch television.

Golly, I've just been
studying, studying, nothing

but study ever since I enrolled.

And tonight is my
bowling night too.

- But you're getting
an education.

- Oh, some education.

Woodcraft?

- Woodcraft, using
precision tools,

carving, sawing, surely you've
got something out of that.

- Well, I've learned how to
open a Band-Aid with one hand.

- But think of your
French, Mr. Nelson.

Someday you may visit
Paris, and you'd

be able to speak the language.

- I don't know, Emmy Lou.

Let's face it.

How many tables can there
be with pens on them?

Tonight is my bowling night.

I wish I could go bowling.

- Why don't you play hooky?

- Oh, Emmy Lou, I
couldn't do that.

- Why not?

- Well-- say, maybe
I could, at that.

I'll bet I could
work out something

so Mrs. Nelson would
never know about it.

How does this sound?

I'm awfully sorry dear, but
I have to go down to school

a little early tonight to
work on the table leg, so

why don't you go down by
yourself and take the car.

Is that all right, dear?

- I think you're
trying to play hooky.

- Play hooky?

- Oh, yes, you are.

You just want to go bowling.

- Whatever gave you
an idea of that sort?

- Emmy Lou told me.

- Emmy Lou!

Well-- oh, don't do
that to me, Emmy Lou.

- Of course I won't, Mr. Nelson.

Actually, I think
it sounds fine.

- Yeah, so do I. I
think it may work.

I guess I'll try it.

- Well, as the Spanish
say, "Hasta la vista."

- Oh!

Wait, Emmy Lou!

Sur la table.

- Here's the morning paper.

You want to see it?

- Oh, well, thanks a lot.

Did you enjoy night
school last night?

- But-- did you?

- Oh, everything went along
about the same as usual.

- Oh, that's nice.

- Uh, Harriet.

- Yes, dear?

- I have a little
confession to make to you.

You'll find out sooner or
later, so I might as well

tell you now.

- Hmm, this sounds
very sinister.

What have you done?

- I didn't go to night
school last night.

I played hooky, in a
manner of speaking.

- Oh, Ozzy, aren't you
ashamed of yourself?

- Go right ahead.

Lay it on me.

I deserve it.

- Well, I have a little
confession to make, too.

- What's that?

- I knew you didn't go to
night school last night.

- Well, how did you know?

- Well, I've been
taking psychology.

I could read the signs.

- What kind of signs?

- Oh, the averted
face, the cast down

eyes, the foot tracing a
pattern on the kitchen linoleum,

you're bowling ball, where
you left it in the bushes

last night.

- Uh, Harriet?

- Yes, dear?

- How did you enjoy
the movies last night?

- Now, how did
you find that out?

- Oh, the boys.

They let it slip to me when
I was buying them a soda

so that they
wouldn't let it slip

to you that I let it slip
to them that I played hooky

last night.

You know, Harriet, we've been
enjoying this night school

tremendously and it's
been a wonderful way

to use our spare time.

But don't you think
it's been selfish of us?

- Yes, I do, dear.

I agree with you 100%.

It's been very selfish.

- Very selfish.

- How?

- Well, for one
thing, the boys have

been missing my companionship.

Do you realize it's
been nearly a week

since I stretched out
under the shade tree

and watched them play baseball?

- Yes, I do.

And the lunches have
been very poor, too--

A couple of sandwiches
and a glass of milk.

- After all, what
have I learned?

"La plume is sur la table."

A sentence I'll
probably never get

to use if I live to
be 100 years of age.

And this woodcraft.

Harriet, I just have no
talent for that sort of thing.

I've taken two cracks
at a table leg,

and each one has
turned out badly.

- Oh, no, dear, the table
leg's a huge success.

Haven't you heard?

- No, no, it's no good at all.

I tried the second one
yesterday, and it's too short.

- Oh, well, for a
table leg maybe.

But David wrapped
some tape around it,

and Ricky hit two
home runs with it.

- Oh, by the way, what
about the surprise

you were knitting for me?

- I'm afraid to show it to you.

I'm afraid you might laugh.

- No, no, honest, I won't laugh.

- Or worse still, I'm
afraid you might cry.

- No, no, I won't.

Let me see it.

- All right, they're right
there in the desk drawer.

- Oh!

Oh, Harriet, how unusual, a
pair of hand-knit laundry bags.

- They're socks.

I've been knitting
them for your feet.

Pretty terrible, aren't they?

- Oh, oh, no, no,
these are excellent,

considering you've been knitting
them with your feet, you say?

- No, I didn't.

- I think they'll
fit me perfectly.

I really do.

You see, I have a very thin heel
and I have a very long big toe,

very fat toes.

These will be fine.

They'll be fine for me.

- Well, that's very
generous of you, dear.

- Gee, there's one thing
bothering me, though.

I mean, if we're going
to quit night school,

I'll have to go down
and tell the teacher.

That's going to be
awfully embarrassing.

- Well, why do you
have to go down there?

- Well, I mean, I
think that they're

entitled to know about it.

We can't just quit.

- Well, why don't you just
drop her a note in the mail?

- Yeah, that's a good idea.

That's the most cowardly--

I mean, convenient
way of doing it.

- What are you looking for?

- My pen.

I usually keep it
right on the desk here.

- Ozzie.

- Yes, dear?

- "La plume est sur la table."

- How do you like that?

Probably the only
time in my life

I'll get a chance to
use that sentence,

and she beats me to it.

- Ozzie and Harriet will
be back in just a moment.

- You know, Harriet,
I've been thinking.

You're absolutely right.

It wasn't Springdale Park where
I used to take you on picnics

and hold your hand.

I remember now.

It was Mountain View Park.

- Oh, well, that's
very interesting, dear,

but I've never been to
Mountain View Park either.

- You sure?

- Positive.

Do you want to
know where it was?

- Well, yes.

Please tell me.

- Inspiration Park.

- Oh!

Harriet, I've never even
heard of Inspiration Park.

- Are you sure?

- I'm positive.

Harriet.

- Yes, dear?

- Who used to take you
to Inspiration Park?

- Go to sleep, dear.

- Next week, "The Adventures
of Ozzie and Harriet"

will be brought to you by
Prophylactic Toothbrushes,

Listerine Toothpaste, and
Listerine, the most widely

used antiseptic in the world.

The part of Emmy Lou was
played by Janet Waldo.

The registrar was
played by Joan Shawlee.

Don't forget that a
completely different episode

of "The Adventures
of Ozzie and Harriet"

is heard every Friday
night on radio.

Consult your newspaper for
time and radio station.

- There are more than 550,000
cerebral palsied in America.

They need the help of all
of us to help them lead

happier, more useful lives.

Today, only a fraction
of these half million

are receiving treatment or help.

Please give to United Cerebral
Palsy in your community today.

Your help is their hope.